#idk my dudes i just love him to bits
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Originally posted July 29 on Twitter/X.
A sketch that got out of hand
Also!!! Here's some never before seen stuff about this since I remembered. This sketch was actually planned to be a full body pic but I didn't like how it was going so I just quickly slapped some colors on the upper body cause that was the only part of I liked LOL
There's also this sketch which is on the same canvas. You could say this was the original sketch before I redraw it
I actually forgot this doodle existed until I decided to poke around in the layers LOL
#Chimera Scribble#Slayer Guilty Gear#Guilty Gear#Sketch#Digital Art#2024#Holy SHIT did this post do numbers on Twitter#I think I gained like 300+ followers after making this post and it was scary#It's so funny cause I had drawn this with the intention of drawing him with a manic expression#Because I love my crazy faces#But then I was like “oh maybe I draw him too feral” which also was the twitter caption just about#And I posted it for the lols and expected like. Idk. a few likes and retweets#Mind you I didn't even hastag the post on twitter#AND INSTEAD THIS POST DID NUMBERS#A SKETCH THAT GOT A BIT OUT OF HAND AND PEOPLE ACTUALLY LIKED IT#Fucking WILD dude#It's been months and I still can't get over it#I know I'm rambling in the tags but I need you guys to know that I have never recovered from this post--#I might've peaked with this and I don't even know what I did#Anyways as of writing this this post is at#78 comments 1.1k retweets 8.5k likes 686 bookmarks 114.4k views#THATS SO CRAZY
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ignore that this is a skyrim video and in polish but this is the polish VA of frank castle in the 1994 show and its the voice frank has in my head always. and i feel a strong need to share that with you guys bc i think it is a good voice
youtube
#marvel#frank castle#the punisher#in another version of the dub frank is voiced by a dude who voiced justice in dragon age awakening which is miles funnier for sure#but this voice is the same as the one that was on the DVDs that i had as a child. so to me this is frank's voice. forever. sorry!#jacek mikołajczyk thank you for having a cool as hell voice i guess#writing the name down so i dont forget it (will forget it anyway)#anyway yeah. voice headcanon. except its canon for polish people. some of them#I LOVE THIS VOICE IDK. hes no grzegorz pawlak but i think grzegorz would also be good for frank actually. maybe once hes like old old#and not just middle aged#no offence to pawlak. he voiced lucien lachance in polish skyrim and i love his voice also to bits#sorry sorry. polish voice actors are my passion.#fun fact also back to daa justice i used to selfship with him too lowkey in a sense. he and my cousland were so tragic <3#human x inhuman my beloved he missed her so much during da2 but didnt realize it until they met again and then they parted immediately
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Incoming... long lost love ex!geto who comes to see you for one last time—on the night that he's going to die.
#this is going to be angsty as hell but LIKE THEYLL BE FLUFF IN IT TOO#BUT ANGST#SINCE IT'LL BE SCORNED!READER#since geto just up and leaves you 10 years ago#the hate fucking will be insane#BUT SINCE THE LOVE IS STILLL THERE AND NEVER LEFT THIGNS GET ALL SOFT AND MUSHY#AND THE CONVOS THAT YOU'LL HAVE THE REMINISCING THE DISCUSSION ON WHY U BROKE UP#ALL THAT GOOD JUICY STUFF#DO U GUYS WANNA SEE THIS SHIT?#IDK WHY IM REALLY ASKING SINCE IM GONNA WRITE IT ANYWAYS#ITS GONNA BE MY BEST WORK YET#LIKE AN ACTUAL FINE CRAFTED PIECE OF WORK#THAT I PROOFREAD AND STUFF#AND LIKE PUT ALL MY EFFORT INTO#its the classic 'when he's mean to everyone but you' trope#or the classic 'you know I'll always love you even when you hate me trope'#and readers all like FUCKKK YOU DUDE#since yk I always have to make my reader a bit of a meanie#but then its the 'when you wanna hate him but you just cant'#so... yes#here's a big#★ — emptalkshit!
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Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.
Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.
#my characters#waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit#deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee#and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name#deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c#man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while#he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair#ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so#its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons#but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me#and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not#fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew#and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable#while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts#and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed#so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en#so you know maybe its that idk#and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now#and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it#and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad#that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal#and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it#the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer#anyway story time in the tags again#im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note#its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him#he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times#and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea#and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you
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Posting this by itself because :) I just feel like he should have gotten to wear the mech pilot suit at least once..
(my AU black version and the og green)
#Legend of Korra#Baatar Jr.#LoK#WIP#[ since this is from something silly I wanted to post this bit because he is serving very cunty#even if you know he's talking about accidentally ingesting caustic chemicals lol#this was def self indulgent but also why couldn't he have worn the suit at least once sobs#we had one chance#I don't actually think he uses the mech suit hardly ever even though he has his own personal one#but on rare occasions he does and gets in this outfit and Kuvira are you okay? Are you good? Has anyone checked on her?#I feel like this outfit is what causes her to take a serious sanity hit LOL#she just drags him away by the hood and no one sees them again for like 4 hours#or she's just like “You know what I think he could use my help :)” and proceeds to be everything but helpful#idk how anything in this regime gets done I swear#the most Baatar ever used the mech suits was when they were first being built#idk dude I love a man in a working uniform sobs#I knew someone would recognize the mech pilot suit hehe that made me smile because yeah :)))#it felt good to draw Baatar again sobs I love him so much I've missed him#I do kinda wish this sketch was cleaner but I wanted to at least post it now in case I never did lol#I should to a proper illust of him in the pilot suit one day just for the pure self indulgence of it all#give myself a lill treat you know? ]#Neon Ocean Art
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Hate having adhd went to go work on my fallout modpack, got distracted while going to disable the steam overlay, ended up in the points shop, went to go edit my profile, decided to change my pfp, found a buried folder I forgot existed, found some old Veneer art I forgot existed, spent 45 minutes looking at all the old photos, STILL HAVE NOT TOGGLED ONE SIMPLE OPTION THAT SHOULD'VE TAKEN 30 SECONDS AT MOST
#I'm shocked I have these drawings scanned on my pc I don't remember doing that I must've done it before I left in case my mom threw all my#Art out again#Anyway at age 12 I was writing a better '3 merpeople go on land to find a 4th one that has been disguised as a human all his life' story#Than Ma/ko Merm/aids EVER did so uh. Take that Jonathan#God it sucks so bad that kid me would've LOVED MM if it just DIDN'T HAVE THE STUPID GENDER WAR BULLSHIT#Literally the entire first and second season is just. So fucking stupid. I wrote a God damn essay about how they fumbled Erik's story SO BAD#I don't even LIKE Erik BUT THEY DID HIM SO DIRTY#THE CHARACTER POTENTIAL AND WRITING COULD'VE BEEN BETTER THAN ZANE B. S1 OF H2O BUT THEY THREW IT AWAY AND FOR WHAT!!!!!!!#Seriously you're telling me a kid who was abandoned his entire life for being male didn't have a bigger impact on the pod than FUCKING ZAK?#That plot twist of 'oh actually Zak was a merman all along' was 100% so they could guilt free write Erik out#Instead of like. Having him face his actions or redeem himself in like. Any way. He just fucks off. THEN the pod is like lol Zac were sorry#We're sorry for literally not doing anything to you because you were privledged enough to have a mother who was super ultra powerful#So you were never really affected by our actions until JUST now. Unlike that other fuckface Erik who suffered his whole life alone#Also then in s3 there are STILL no mermen in the pod. Not even little mermen babies. No kids and teens they've welcomed back n apologized to#NOTHING#God. Mm pisses me off dude#AND I STILL HAVENT TOGGLED THAT FUCKING OPTIONS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#Cruddy rambles#God I'm not done I'm sorry fallout can wait YOU ARE TELLING ME THE GUY WHO TELLS US HOW SHITTY MERMAN BABIES R TREATED BY THE POD. IS NOT#THE SAME ONE THE POD APOLOGIZES TO IN THE SEASON FINALE BECAUSE THEY WROTE IN A SHITTY PLOT TWIST?#AUUUUUUUHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG#It's so bad. It's so fucking bad. It's so needlessly gendered and for what. They could've just had 2 rival warring pods#What pisses me off the most is that s3 (4) completely pivots and never really follows thru with the s1 and 2 story arcs#The writers just kinda wash thsir hands of that because 'hey the pod said sorry to zac' BUT THEN NOTHING ACTUALLY CHANGES!!!!#Maybe instead of having a constantly rotating cast of characters s3 (4) could've instead focused on Ondina and Erik's relationship a bit#Maybe have Ondina tell him she wants to just stay friends because she can't trust him. Have him IDK grow and change as a character?#Maybe so you can show kids nobody is born evil and we all need support systems and healthy relationships to grow and become better people??#THAT would've been a GOOD FOLLOW THROUGH#But no instead u just write him out of the show and never show any OTHER mermen who were exiled being welcomed back#Like u had Ondina becoming a teacher... Why not have Zac become a teacher for all the new mermen who were just recently welcomed back??
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i love doodling swapinverse like hello drawing characters aside from the normal mtt is lowkey therapeutic 🧡🧡🧡 anyways i FINALLY FINALLY finished crash's lore!!!! and vice.SER is connected to him,,,, theyre interconnected!!! i forgot how much i liked crash's design (not the design but all the little gimmicks in the design. figuring out all the hanging ribbon bits is annoying but hey it looks good)
#outertale does not exist in swapinverse anymore. how quaint#dude thalia and melpomene are th only ones that r like. 100% good#I NEED TO MAKE MORE GOOD AND NICE CHARACTERS😭😭😭😭#mst..... recreators (qip name 4 siphon n crash?) and vice.SER........ theyre all EVIL (or have evil goals)#i WAS thinking doing something with reaper because i adore his design and aesthetic and i wanna combine it with SOMETHING idk what#anyways if core frisk error which is supposed to be vice.SER exists then should normal core frisk exist too?????#i mean i dont think that just because a core frisk role esque person exists doesnt mean the role is instantly filled up#the mst and mtt co exist in swapinverse but those 3 are like.... NORMAL aus. not outcodss n stuff#i love the giant lance thing i gave crash. i mean the ribbons can form any weapon and take any shape (kinda like puella magi mami's guns)#but like..... it just is so cool i love characters that use multiple weapons#i LOVE (haha) every single little gimmick thing i give swapinverse characters. the tiny details is what i adore giving them#if you catch me not posting 4 a bit its probably just bc im working on swapinverse or jk fashion au. or maybe ive seriously just lost motiva#anyways i have a few banger rants in my drafts ive yet to elaborate om but just like....... i dont feel like it#someon needs to wrangle those posts out of my tired lazy arms#lowkey why do siphon and crash remind me of kanade and mafuyu. idk i cant explain#if you cut vice.ser in half it would be like jelly with binary in it. i wanna eat him#he would tingle on my tongue but thats just the static. eating yhe glasses would be difficult bit they dont have lenses so its ok#i drew them both looking at us but i think that vice.ser is the only true one always looking at US.looking out from inside#god i love swapinverse sooo much i wish i could get it done faster and be goatedly good with motivation. a shame#but i do think that i may be finishing up the character descriptions 500% ish sure#SO THEN THAT MEANS I CAN WORK ON THE ACTUAL STORY!!!! WOOOOO#ive already decided that theres gonna be mentions of me myself and i in it. i love meta storytelling#im cursed with perpetually sweaty hands i hate having to draw on slighty damp paper. nobody understands me#UGH im getting too happy in life im starting to act weird in public and offering to help people. i need to stop#anyways just school doodles!!! because in the period where they take our phones i have naught to do but draw#i need to get back (start) my english reading. and then help my friend with a few questions on her homework. how joyous#and then i can get back to my BETTER homework (working on swapinverse :3)#crash managed to destroy outertale in his lore i wonder how many worlds vice.SER will destroy#actually if hes supposed to be core frisk error then i should make him NOT destroy worlds right???? right#tricule rant
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Summary:
Three little scenes on the theme of singing.
:) I was in the mood for something short and sweet. Hope you enjoy!
#gotta go back to work for a bit but i couldn't resist posting this as soon as i had a few free minutes#i originally meant to post these on here only but the middle vignette got away from me a bit. lol#i think the moment miles complained about rose humming is the moment that cemented my severe dislike of him. like. dude.#your girlfriend is snow-white mary poppins the most adorable princess ever#and you complain? that she hums??? im going to break your kneecaps????#idk what else i can say about dorothy singing 'what'll i do'. that scene is everything it changed my life ngl#i guess i wanted a happier memory related to it than 'oh she sings it and then leaves forever four episodes later'#i hope rose's pov works well! i'm never quite sure about it. i should give a try to a whole fic in her pov soon#please tell me im not the only one who found blanche's beer jingle to be the sweetest thing ever. she sang it in such a soft voice#like it's funny ofc but i just melted#might be because im in love with her though#i always ramble in the tags when i post this stuff lmao. i hope you all have fun#hugs and kisses for you!#the golden girls#golden wives#writing
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Anyway I changed my mind about not posting shipping stuff. Jack and Shadowbent had something. The wolf and the shepherd. Change my mind.
#I’m normally generally apathetic towards shipping at best and I don’t like it at worst. I think there’s only a handful of ships I do like#But I’ve always liked werewolves sooo#I just think they’d have a fun dynamic#Better with movie!jack bc I don’t like book!jack#Shadowbent could have a little better design as well but I think he’s a little funky dude all the same#They’re ex situationship but still in love#I’m ready to be absurdly absolutely insane about them#I’ve been working on a WIP about them getting together and then breaking up for literal years. It’s been so long#id post fanart but I can’t decide on a fucking design for Shadowbent#bc I want to keep the vibe of the og while still making him a bit more… ✨dreamy✨ ig?#Idk what to say but I was raised on twilight movie marathons (against my will funnily enough) and seeing Jacob did something to me#so did teen wolf#there’s a really specific vision in my head that I cannot bring out of my head#Rotg#rise of the guardians#jack frost#skreeklavic shadowbent#shadowbent
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I think making sweeping generalizations of specific traits being considered "ugly" is not great the same way i think its rude and unnecessary to call others ugly, i also think its worthwhile to acknowledge that certain traits ARE considered "Ugly" due to societal beauty standards, that doesn't make them ACTUALLY ugly, bc beauty is subjective anyway, and can be found Anywhere, and even someone who seems to tick every single box of societal beauty Ideals will almost certainly have at least one trait or feature about their appearance that they are insecure about or feel is "ugly", bc even within the constraints of conventional attractiveness theres subjectivity
also this fish was so fucking Ugly and i adored it so much. i miss him.
he was also gorgeous.
#toy txt post#toy pic post#he passed in like. man. i want to say 2019? his name was Gus. he was a pink kissing gourami#the thing about albino fish is that they always look a little bit sickly and concerning. his head always seemed a little big for his body#like he was really old. when i got him he looked so bad cos he had wounds all over him from dads fish that got infected and the dude#straight up looked like a zombie. every day id wake up and prepare myself to find him dead. but he recovered and never went back in w the#fish that injured him. his face was hideous. he looked pale and sickly. his head was a little too big like he was super old#his scales were iridescent and pretty and shimmery. he had no concept of giving a shit about me finding him beautiful or not. not even on#his mind. simply not something he would think about. now. im sure he'd have some sort of beauty standard to hold himself to for mating if#that had been an option for him. but it wouldnt be the same. idk. i just. i love the idea. of animals that are not traditionally cute or#beautiful or charismatic and the fact that they do not give a single fucking shit what we think of the way they look. BOTH ways. a#a butterfly does not give a single thought tohow beautiful or inspiring you find the colors of its wings. the wolf fish does not care that#humans find it hideous and terrifying. it just looks the way that it does. its fine. its vibing. it just wants to live and survive and get#enough food. yes beauty is everywhere but so is ugly. and there is beauty in ugly. to me. there is beauty in not even thinking about#standards to be conformed to or not. the beauty is irrelevant. its not For You. it doesnt Matter. its just Existing. if you like how it#looks while it exists? great! good for you. if you dont? okay cry about it i guess. this ugly ass fish doesnt give a shit if humans find it#beautiful or not. he was just going to continue to use his lips covered in teeth to scrape biofilm and algae off the surface of rocks and#driftwood and play in the current of the filter.#let girls be ugly the way marine iguanas dont give a shit if humans find them pretty cos theyre just sunning themselves and eating seaweed#off rocks. all humans are beautiful. all humans are ugly. it doesnt matter. let us go dive into the ocean and scrape seaweed off the rocks#and then bask in the sun on a warm rock and not fucking worry about that#anyway also Yes ive seen uglier fish than him.i know they exist. but he was also special cos he was My Fish u see
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theres another member of zarbons species in the moro arc of dragon ball super! he transforms into a differentmonster form than zarbon
Yuzun! i know him! or well, i kinda know him. i'm not really caught up or invested in anything Dragon Ball related beyond Buu Saga, but i've learned somewhat about him.
i think he's pretty neat! and i'm really happy they expanded Zarbons race just a little bit with Yuzun. though you hate to hear how he went out... there's no peace for my mans race. i hate this solar system. fuuuck.
#ask#shelbybunny#i like his design :) although its really hard to top zarbon's.............. <- sorry just those combinations of words turned off his brain.#understand okay?#i think his monster form is cool! idk if id be as weird about his monster form as i am with Zarbons :) but i like him#i dont know if Super would have this part in the anime... idk anything about super... but i imagine Yuzun having a surfer dudes voice#kinda like yajirobe's voice yknow#atleast that was always my first impression. though i guess i could see a similar regal voice coming from him#though ogh those wrist bands. i dont think anything for me could top Zarbons arm warmers#Zarbons arm warmers have always stuck out in my brain as like one of my favourite details.#literally would love to have some like... thick pink nylon arm warmers. thats how ive always imagined Zarbons to be#or a fabric similar to nylon. that smooth soft fabric yknow. that good shit.#i think if i wore those my brain would turn off because id be stimming those shits.#anyway :) yuzuns really neat. continuously happy knowing theres more of his race than just Zarbon#fuck frieza girlies. there'd be so much more of Zarbons race if it werent for that bitch bastard.#i'll never get behind the frieza zarbon dynamic. ive always kinda seen zarbon as being afraid of frieza#like its more obvious near his last few episodes in the show but. ugh man.#i believe what zarbon said in his final moments of saying he'd turn to vegetas side and go against frieza.#then that little bitch put a hole in him. horrible horrible. hate on planet namek.#anyway! thank you for the ask :) i appreciate getting to talk about Yuzun a little bit
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I think what is missing with 4-sided Dive that Talks Machina had was a third party to have those character discussions with. It's not the same with a fellow PC. Also someone with interviewing abilities, sometimes I feel like they meander so much.
And I do like to watch them talk, I do watch old episodes of AWNP, fireside chat, etc, but for discussing the game/campaign I think the mechanics of it muddles with the flow.
I personally feel no value is added from the tower of inquiry or the cup questions, though I don't mind the game playing at the end since at this point who had their curiosity satisfied can simply leave, but answering while playing which they tried doing at least once I watched didn't work at all.
Edit: Btw when I say no value is added I mean the format (being in a cup, pulling from the tower) and not the questions themselves.
#and. idk about y'all. but the broom bit just goes over my head#does anyone actually find that funny?#i can see some of them either don't want or don't like 'hosting'#them reading off the teleprompter also ruins the mood#i wish there was someone prepared to guide them through these conversations#maybe not dani bc she's prone to adding her own insights. which i like! but not in a host#SOMEONE TO CONTROL SAM#i *love* him but he derails so much#anyway. I'm not saying 4sided dive is doomed. but I think it has a *long* way to go before it's on TM level#unless you hated brian then all I'm saying must sound like bs xD#AND btw i have no nostalgia for TM. I hopped on this train in c3 and I haven't watched c2#i just really enjoyed their conversations#talks machina#4-sided dive#critical role#cr stuff#4 sided dive#(late addendum: this was written b4 the shitty dude's debacle. im really sad he ruined to show for everyone that admired him in the past#BUT i still recognize the value it had. not just from his hosting but from the format. the questions submitted#while my opinion remains. my admiration for him does not. i still wish for a host for the new show. obviously someone different)
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not to project too hard onto a fictional character but at what point did it just become so standard for John to get high grades in academics that his family stopped acknowledging it because that was the norm
#is this bc i told my family about my results and literally no one said anything despite responding to my second question#so i know they saw it#yes 😔#come on fam I'm allowed to be proud and excited and I want to share that 🥺🥺🥺🥺#yes I DO want to be told congrats for every result I worked hard for that!!#how is it that my friends and colleagues are more hyped than you i don't get it#(i will make character sad for the same reasons as me watch out)#anyway my family are very lovely but alas tall poppy syndrome is rampant#and i'm just more senstive bc the sads are here for other reasons#but also dude :(#idk#also this is not a post meant to be like john's soooo much smarter than everyone else bc he is not and I'll die on that hill#they're all smart#but i do like the idea of him being into academics and basing just a bit too much of his self esteem on his grades#and falling just a wee bit on the arrogant side of pride when it comes to those smarts#bc that is something I do unfortunately relate to 🤪🤪#forreal physics students get a bit of a god complex and are super insufferable for a few years source: me#so#am i rambling to make myself feel better yes#poking fun at john is a favourite past time of mine what can i say#anyway releasing this into the world bc screw it#then I should probs make dinner bc it's getting a bit late
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i have to come to terms with the fact that I am actually well off for someone in this country now, like.. idk it's weird
i'm still living the exact same lifestyle that i was before, so for the most part it feels almost like nothing has changed, like maybe im spending a little bit more money on food and buying the "good" toilet paper, but all that does is allow me to actually have savings in my bank account
i still stand with the working class and impoverished people of this country, and I am very much still in the boat of "one [very] bad day from homelessness" so i am not taking this for granted whatsoever
i've just been watching some of those youtube channels where they interview random people all over the country and just like.. kinda show what their life is like and it's definitely putting mine in perspective
very very grateful for the opportunities i have had and very proud of myself for forcing myself to stay in college (even tho it took almost 10 years to finish and left me with a mountain of debt) and just like.. idk, i feel like i could be doing more to help people out, i can't wait til im out of debt ;o;
#like idk it makes me feel a little bad sometime that im able to live comfortably while others arent#fuck i mean i got one of my friends living on my fucking couch rn i have a daily reminder of the inequality in this country#cause he doesnt have any qualifications to get a good enough job to fucking LIVE in this city#he's been trying to find a place to live but everywhere wants you to be making 3x the rent#and there's not a fucking job in this town that will pay you that much...#it's college town most people here are not even paying their own rent their well-off parents are paying it#ive never even fucking paid rent here i was living off the good fucking graces of my friends and my partner for like 7 years#and im still not paying rent i live in a trailer park and i own the trailer it's a shitty 2bd that i've had to pay to fix multiple times#but the fact that i can even afford to do that now is INSANE TO ME#I OWN A BUILDING WTF#i mean i do pay lot rent but it's only $300/mo#but rent prices here keep going up and up and up and i feel bad for my friend cause i dont know wtf he's supposed to do#i'm not charging him anything to live here so he's saved up a bunch of money but no matter how much he has the apartment places dont care#cause he wont have that money once he has to spend it all on bills and then his paychecks wont be able to cover living costs...#and i love him but he's just a little bit stupid and like.. doesn't seem to comprehend that he cannot afford a place that's $900 :'D#like he thinks that because he makes $1500 a month that he can spend $900 of that on rent like buddy NOO#what about FOOD? and OTHER BILLS? that's JUST rent dude what about lights and water????#but also idk i dont feel THAT bad for him cause he could always just move back in with his mom or live with a roommate but he fcking refuse#anyway this got off on a tangent the point is once im out of debt im donating all my fucking money
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hmmmm... ran into my ex today
#cy says stuff#personal#it's been three years but i had such a strong feeling that i would see him and i did#he definitely saw me first and when we made eye contact i think he like confirmed that it was me#and he looked... scared#which is like. dude it's been three years i have made peace with it#and then he literally just ran out of the building without ordering food or anything#and I'm like damn i wanted to talk to you!#i wanna know how he is!#but tbh by the looks of it he seemed unwell! which is sad because i really wanted him to be okay..#i just feel so much older now and seeing him again really made me realize how i just want him to not be sad anymore#And i felt that when we were dating and after we broke up#and to see that he's still sad is like :((( idk it kind of breaks my heart a little bit#i know he's still beating himself up about everything and I'm like bro i forgave you years ago i promise you it's okay#idk. i wish him well. i hope he turns out okay. i hope he figures out how to love himself and the life he's been given#and I'm happy i cut off contact when i did because i know it would've broken my heart to see him stay like this for so long#and i wonder why his reaction was to be afraid#because i was stern after we broke up but i was never out here threatening ppl or actively trying to hurt them#like the worst thing i did was ask him why he thought it was appropriate to keep randomly texting me to compliment my appearance after we'd#been broken up for months#and I'm like what life experiences are you having that make you afraid.. what have you come to expect???#idk i feel like he's just so guilty about everything he's ever done and he's made himself out to be this monster that deserves that respons#but he really isn't like he was just a kid and he just keeps fucking himself over cause he never learned how to be healthy or get help#idk im kind of grieving for him rn! like I'm sorry your life turned out like that!#i can't make it better for him but im definitely not going to make it worse#and if we ever talk i will tell him i forgive him and that he should forgive himself too#for that at least lmao#no idea what he's been up to in these past few years#but he clearly wasn't ready to talk today so#maybe some other time some other place some other world
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Joke's on me turns out I like kissing as long as it's Jay
#sky is aro ace#qpp tag#honestly I'm questioning this label a bit now#are we queerplatonic? idk#I'm old and i don't want to spend a lot of energy thinking about it#he's just my dude#my guy#my future husband#and I love him
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