#idk man hes eating a live frog

[crescentmoonrider]

げろげろ 🐸

[haecien]

SEVENTEENS reaction to their s/o being scared/screaming about bugs.

Note: I have no idea who is & is not scare of bugs in svt... this is just my interpretation!! If there is a video/post about this tell me!!! also fun fact, a Cockroach was roaming around my room while writing

Warning: mentions of killing, the word die😭 all of this is jokes, none of these are real! slight cursing!

Genre: fluff, jst fluff

766 words 3,883 characters

C.SC -

At first he thought you were dying when he heard your blood curtailing scream, turns out there was a fly just roaming around and it happen to just touch your face.

Now he has learned to carry at least 1 tiny can of bug spray just for you, it gives him a heart attack over your screams. He finds it a bit cute whenever you clung to him after seeing a bug near you.

Y.JH -

Same reaction for the first time of coups. But.... instead of comforting he just... almost teased you to death/j

He'd secretly hide those fake toys of bugs ALL around your shared house/apartment/...idk any living place lmao

You'd almost kill him for doing that, still gets you everytime. Ofc he made it up to you, he is still your boyfriend after all

" Hey... come on I'm sorry! I forgot to remove itt"

*silent treatment*

H.JS -

He would try to calm you down at first, if you were still wailing about the bug he would try and kill it or carefully place it outside.

He would endlessly caress you and tell you that you're alright

(Bro im giggling)

"Joshua i swear ill love you til I die" " Then die😊🤭" /j

(If ykyk)

W.JH-

Who knows he'll eat the bug, jk. He would prob scream with you, he'll act up like " I'll protect you! " then comes running back to you terrified

" YOU DIDN'T TELL ME IT WAS THAT BIG " " WAAAHAA I KNOW... "

Eventually he sucked it up and very "bravely" shoo shoo away the bug. BEGONE! " You know! I was just acting, I wasn't really scared... " " Totally.... "

K.SY-

" AAAAAAAAA " Wow is HE more scared than YOU? Yes, a matter of fact he is.... " You know i've seen tigers beat bigger enemies... yet you're scared of a single bug?? I guess you're not really a tiger. "

Those exact words, they made him furious and he quickly got a broom and vigorously whacked the bug away! In times of need you just made him question his identity as a tiger.

J.WW-

Honestly, would be kinda chill. He carefully took a piece of paper and a glass and scooped up the bug and placed it outside.

He asked if you wanted to play with him to help you calm down, you said yes NEVER wanting to set a foot outside right now. (Ok now imagine resting your head on his broad ass shoulders while playing and he'd run his fingers through your hair)

L.JH-

Same reaction as Wonwoo, BUT It would take him awhile to come down from his room😭the time he came down you'd almost started thinking of burning this entire house to the ground. (No reason, i keep thinking about the fluffy hair jihoon with THE black turtleneck shirt that's kinda tight)

X.MH-

So... Fuck it he's letting you take care of it/j yeah he's gnna flame that bug, BURN THE WITCH! If he mocks you about this you would bring up the thing with him and frogs😭(if you don't know I remember seeing a video of seeing minghao being scared of irl frogs but not animated ones ex: keroppi)

K.MG-

Hes a big boy... but he's just a puppy tbh, LITTERALLY LOOK (I got off track sorry HAJSJSK Free gyu pics ig HAHA)

Deff is also scared of the bugs too, poor baby just stood there frozen while the bug flew on his face. Prob had to call a friend to help you HAHA

L.SK-

You know he's gnna hit those high notes, who's going to help you both in this state oh my god. "YOU'RE THE MAN. GO GET IT. " the bug flew away before you both could even do anything " Sunshine i drove it away!! " ".... YaaYyyy.... " *dies*

H.VC-

" HANSOL... " he looked at you confused literally deadass holding the now DEAD bug in his hands " what do I do with it? Throw it o-- " "NO! " bitch I thought you were scared of it " ... ill just do whatever "

B.SK-

He gets scared easily too so... hajimalago/j would be sassy about it " Why don't you get it! You saw it first " kind of guy you'd end up bickering with him too much that the bug decided to just dip out

L.CN-

The only guy who actually protected you HELP, you'd move to another room and let him take care of it. He'd keep reassuring you that you were fine and that the bug was gone, no more bugs will bother you anymore

[bolithesenate]

hello i would like you to choose violence. questions 1, 7, and 13?

AND VIOLENCE WE SHALL CHOOSE

1 - the character everyone gets wrong

can I say Yoda?

i feel like theres two camps in fandom: either he's a Fun Lil Guy Who Eats Frogs And Talks (sometimes helpful) Riddles OR he is The Source Of All Our Problems (derogatory)

and make no mistake. i've been part of group 2 before and especially in EU material there are a lot of... questionable choices made by the man. deeply questionable. but I lso feel like there's no one really tackling the sheer existential horror that is yoda's life?

he is older than all his peers. if we look at grogu, then he must have, already as a *baby*, seen his friends grow up, live and die like like fireflies, shining bright for only the briefest moment. basically all of his padawans are dead. his padawans' padawans as well.even with the extended livespans that jedi have, he is so old that he literally speaks different

idk, i think i just want to see more people look at this weird green guy and really THINK about why he is how he is, bad sides and all

(and yes, I also could have said Tarre Vizsla here, bc i have some very CHOICE opinions on him. but ive talked about those in length before, so Yoda it is)

7 - character I began to hate bc of how fanon acts about them

Obi-Wan

well, it's not really hate-hate, but I now find myself actively avoiding fics that have him tagged as a main guy.

idk, i've just grown bored of him?

also i really don't understand why ppl find him so hot. sorry. he looks like a random guy i could see at the train station.

like, guys! expand your horizons a bit! there's so many funny little guys out there in the big gffa, do we really have to sing the praises of the same ginger over and over again? yeah I'm salty but this is revenge for every time a random commenter asks about Obi-Wan in a fic where he isn't even tagged

13 - worst blorbofication

yeah.

see above.

second worst to me probably is Bo-Katan. idk, i don't get it. this woman was a literal dterrorist and showed no remorse whatsoever about being part of the reason her sister is dead and her planet crumbled. and yet people call her a girlboss?

idk, make it make sense

[gemwolfz]

WHOOOO'S READY FOR BABY BIRD FOR KERONIAN AUDIENCE- ew why is the "coming up next" for this episode at the beginning of this ep instead of the back of the last one where it belongs. whats goin on aniwatch- HOLY FUCK MOMOKA'S MOM MENTIONED. anyway i think intro i havent seen yet dropped fr this time

GUYS THERES A FUCKING UNSUPERVISED INFANT. IN MY HOUSE.

(keroro voice) fuuuuck i don't want to be the frog virgin mary.

idk man he's fuckin green. but i assure you all if keroro had a child he would brag about it to you all well before it even grew arms

(keroro voice) WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT. HUH. WHUH

hes literally pogging. Hey who wants to talk about the implications of baby keronians drinking milk. where is it coming from. why do you kids still have baby formula and bottles laying around anyway do you have secret babysitting jobs ive never seen. i love refusing to suspend disbelief for the bit

soldier with heart of steel falls to the keronian nature of "awww babie :3" (probably with aims of impressing his crush but Nuh Uh. Reality can be whatever i want)

true brood parasite behavior. i salute you

POINTING. keroro babytalk...

I'm not gonna sugarcoat it

i like how dororo pulls a cushion for changing babubu right out of hammerspace. why did you have that with you you don't even live here. maybe it was on the floor beside him or something but thats not as funny

my brother in christ you shouldnt be eating at the fucking morning meeting anyway smh

what do you suggest sir. he cant just leave the fucking baby somewhere. he's not even taking maternity leave

he's truly a frog in spirit. Infinite piss machine just like a real frog

This is a really good image how have i never seen it

you know it would actually help a lot if you guys helped. theres five of you this baby could be supervised every minute of the day. and then keroro wouldnt be on the brink of collapse at any given moment. bet you guys never considered that huh

agab (assigned gender at bird)

True brood parasite behavior

naturally anyway. the alternative to "not a keronian at all" would be "secret war crime government project", not like keroro's not adopted one of those as well in his days

yknow his fully fledged form has a strikingly tadpole-like tail.

gem's "think like gem!" assignment: - most parasitic birds will, at one point before they're fully-grown, encounter other birds of their species. babubu never did. - also being a brood parasite means that, unlike what they thought, babubu never had a name before keroro gave him one. remember keroro you truly were his only parent his birdparents are deadbeats (species-typical)

[lizzie-is-here]

like the dawn

part xvi- the storm

“i want you to always remember me. will you remember that i existed, and that i stood next to you here like this?” - haruki murakami

summary: the mad titan comes calling

wordcount: 1.9k (my tiny bby 🥺)

warnings: cussing (i think? idk honestly), lil fluff, violence ig, uhh infinity war but just the beginning, forgot bucky got the hot arm and had to include that, sad foreshadowing slay

taglist: @whelvedfeelingsstuff @sebsgirl71479 @rebloggingmyrecs @babyblublossom @local-mr-frog @thenyxsky @capsiclesdoll @moonlightreader649 @saranghaey @almosttoopizza @itsivymusic

a/n: IM BACK BITCHES. sorry this part is short but the next part is coming up very soon bc i’m excited to hopefully make y’all cry 👍 as always, love you, very proud of you, stay hydrated and eat something pls and hope u enjoy! this may not be my best work but i’ll make it up to you when… the stuff happens lmao 💀 happy 2023!!! 🤍🤍🤍

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“He came out of nowhere.”

You stare up at the holographic screen.

You’ve been back for barely a week, and there’s something new on the horizon. From out in space, a genocidal maniac has made himself known.

He calls himself Thanos. The last survivor of a planet whose civilization fell long ago. And he’s hunting for stones that can apparently control every part of the universe.

You’re lucky the team received the warning in time. Thor, Bruce Banner, and the remaining Asgardians had narrowly escaped the titan, and fled to Earth to warn you of the danger.

The god had asked a few questions about your wings, as fascinated by them as you were about the magical hammer he carried.

Despite what the others said, you quickly realized that Thor wasn’t dumb, not even dense. Just unaccustomed to modern life. Much like you and your boys.

Okay, maybe he was a little bit dense.

Alongside them, another addition had arrived in the form of a sorcerer by the name of Stephen Strange. His demeanor reminded you of a certain genius.

But there wasn’t time to worry about much other than preparing for the coming siege. There wasn’t time to warn the governments of the world. You needed to suit up. Quickly.

“What’s his objective?” Steve asks, one hand on the small of your back and the other entwined with Bucky’s flesh hand.

“He’s a plague,” Bruce rasps. “He invades planets. He takes what he wants. He wipes out half the population. He sent Loki.” He points to the rather greasy reformed god, who frowns.

“So this is it,” Tony hums. The billionaire is oddly composed, silently calculating. “What’s our timeline?”

“No telling. He has the Power and Space Stones. That already makes him the strongest creature in the whole universe. If he gets his hands on all six stones, Tony…”

Strange cuts in. “He could destroy life on a scale hitherto undreamt of.”

You wrinkle your nose a bit.

“Did you seriously just say ‘hitherto undreamt of’? God, you sound like my grandfather.” you ask.

“Are you seriously complaining about how I talk when you’re 100 years old?”

“Physically, I’m about 30, so-“

Bucky sighs. “Joacă frumos, păpușă [Play nice, doll].”

Tony speaks before you start arguing with the sorcerer again. “If Thanos needs all six, why don’t we just stick Mr. Sparkles’s stone down the garbage disposal?” he asks, gesturing to the Time Stone held in the amulet.

“No can do,” the man retorts. Wong, another sorcerer explains.

“We swore an oath to protect the Time Stone with our lives.”

Tony shrugs. “And I swore off dairy, but then Ben & Jerry’s named a flavor after me-“

“Ok, boys, how about we table this conversation for a time when we aren’t in danger,” Nat snaps.

“Ok, look, Thanos has the biggest army in the universe, and he’s not gonna stop until he gets… Vision’s stone.”

You nod. “Then we have to protect it.” The android, from his place staring out the window, disagrees.

“No, we have to destroy it. I’ve been giving a good deal of thought to this entity in my head. About its nature.” He pauses, stepping towards Wanda. “But also its composition. I think if it were exposed to a sufficiently powerful energy source, something very similar to its own signature, perhaps-“

Vision leans close to the girl. “-its molecular integrity could fail.” You knew what he was asking. All of you did. But no one wanted to say it.

“Yeah, and you with it,” Wanda chuckles, disbelieving. “We’re not having this conversation.”

“Eliminating the stone is the only way to be certain that Thanos can’t get it,” he presses.

“That’s too high a price.”

Your chest aches as the android gently takes her face in his hands.

“Only you have the power to pay it. Thanos threatens half the universe. One life cannot stand in the way of defeating him.”

“But it should,” Steve says. “We don’t trade lives, Vision.” You rest a hand on his arm, nodding when he looks to you for support.

“Captain, 70 years ago, you laid down your life to save how many millions of people?” Vision queries. Despite being a robot, his voice is laced with uncertainty. Fear. “Tell me, why is this any different?”

Tony, Bruce, and Peter look up from where they were discussing.

“Because you might have a choice,” the doctor says. “Your mind is made up of a complex construct of overlays. JARVIS, Ultron, Tony, me, the stone. All of them mixed together, all of them learning from one another.”

Wanda takes a sharp breath. “You’re saying Vision isn’t just the stone?”

“I’m saying that if we take out the stone, there’s still a whole lot of Vision left, perhaps the best parts.”

“Can we do that?” Nat asks.

Bruce shakes his head. “Not me, not here.”

Peter, as quiet as he’d been, raises his hand. “I know someone! And somewhere.”

You raise a brow. “So do I.”

“Shuri,” both of you say.

“How do you know her?” Bucky asks. The teen sheepishly shrugs.

“She started sending me advice on how to fix my suits from Instagram.”

FRIDAY’s voice echoed over the speakers. “Boss, something’s entered the atmosphere in lower Manhattan.”

Tony curses under his breath. “Shit, okay. We’ve gotta split up.”

“Okay, normally I’m all for your plans, but that seems like a horrible idea,” Sam says.

“We don’t have any other choice. You go to Wakanda, Thor and his crew can head into space to recruit any help we can get, and we’ll stay and handle this,” the billionaire says, gesturing to himself, Peter, and the sorcerers.

A knot forms in your gut. “And if it’s Thanos?”

No one responds. It’s a real possibility that none of you want to think about.

“Then we’ll hold him off until you get there.”

———————————————————————

The quinjet has never flown faster. A quick call to T’Challa and Shuri meant that you were rushing off the plane the moment you arrived, before the princess grabbed Bucky, Steve, and you.

“Come with me. I have an upgrade for that outdated arm of yours,” she calls.

“Is there time?” the brunet asks. Entering her lab, dozens of doctors hurry over. Bucky grabs yours and Steve’s hands, unsure of how to navigate this.

“It’ll be okay,” Steve assures. You nod, following as they lay him down on a table.

They’re unbelievably quick as they work, a hologram providing a view into everything going on. Within minutes, he’s gone under and they’ve started removing the heavy titanium.

Shuri herself carefully implants a new base for the arm, which clicks into place with little trouble. That’s when you see the arm.

It’s gold and black, crafted with careful detail but still bulky enough to balance out. You lift it gently, finding the weight to be much lighter than the old one. Vibranium.

Doctors take the arm from you with knowing smiles, precisely but swiftly locking it in place.

When he sits up minutes later, you hold your breath.

Flexing the new hand, Bucky stares in awe at the prosthetic.

“I… I can feel again.”

He reaches for you and Steve, and can’t believe it when he can truly feel your wings with his left hand. The sensation isn’t perfect, but he’ll take it over the cold, unfeeling HYDRA arm any day.

“What’s it like?” Steve asks, holding Bucky’s face with one hand.

“Perfect.”

A voice calls from the door.

“As cute as you three are, we’ve gotta hurry.” Nat holds up a projection. “Tony says Thanos isn’t in Manhattan.”

The rest of the group is hurrying in behind her, guiding Vision onto the operating table as Shuri prepares for a much more difficult procedure.

“The structure is polymorphic,” she comments.

Bruce nods. “Right, we had to attach each neuron non-sequentially.”

“Why didn’t you just reprogram the synapses to work collectively?” You don’t understand what they’re saying, but by the look on Bruce’s face, she’s made an excellent point.

“… Because we didn’t think of it.”

The girl purses her lips to hide a smile. “I’m sure you did your best.”

Wanda and Shuri begin to discuss the complications of the procedure, but you wander to the window. It’s too perfect. The sky is dappled with clouds and Wakanda is going on as normal as possible with the impending disaster looming on the horizon.

Right on cue, Sam’s voice rings through your earpiece.

“Hey, Cap, we got a situation here.”

You watch as a vessel crashes into the protective shield that surrounds the city, blowing up and leaving no damage.

“Don’t start celebrating yet. We got more incoming outside the dome,” Rhodey groans.

Fire blazes into view as more ships crash into the earth. You feel your heart rate increase.

“It’s too late, we need to destroy the stone now,” Vision says. The look on Wanda’s face is enough for you to shake your head.

“Get your ass back on that table,” you press.

T’Challa nods. “We will hold them off.”

Steve turns to the anxious Sokovian. “Wanda, as soon as that stone’s out of his head, you blow it to hell.”

“I will.”

———————————————————————

You soar above dozens of hovering vehicles as the aliens approach the barrier. It’s hard to get a clear view of the enemy, but below you, you can clearly spot Bruce in the Hulkbuster and Nat, Bucky, and Steve on a carrier. Beside you, Rhodey and Sam scope out the area.

One small disadvantage of your abilities. Flight comes naturally. No tech. No heat scanners or AI. No extra help. Just your powers and your wings.

At the tree line, one huge alien and one smaller one stop. The Wakandan forces fall into formation, and you watch from the air as Nat, Steve, and T’Challa go to face the two.

No surprise, it goes horribly. The crash-landed ships open, and you can make out hundreds of ugly, dog-like aliens barreling through the forest.

You land next to your boys just in time to hear Bucky mumble, “What the hell?”

“Looks like we pissed her off,” Nat mumbles.

“They’re killing themselves,” Okoye whispers in horror. She’s right. Only a few make it through the barrier before being immediately killed. The rest are sliced by the force field.

Bucky shoots down some and Bruce fires lasers while the Wakandans take out the rest.

At your side, you twist your hands. It’s been months since you’ve used your powers. Partly out of fear, but also as a way to forget all of the memories that came with them.

While you worry, one alien makes it through Bucky’s rain of gunfire, jumping towards you with a slavering mouth full of yellowed teeth.

Quick as ever, you swing out your hand, and the burst of light is so potent that it disintegrates on contact.

“Well, good to know that that still works,” Steve says, arm still raises from where he went to defend you. Twin shields are mounted on his wrists, with razor-sharp points.

“Cap, of these things circle the perimeter and get in behind us,” Bruce begins. “There’s nothing between them and Vision.

“Then we better keep ‘em in front of us,” Steve replies.

“How are we supposed to do that?” you ask. It’s not like you can tell them where to go.

T’Challa swallows. “We open the barrier.” He lifts a hand to his earpiece before you can protest. “On my signal, open North-West Section Seventeen.”

“This will be the end of Wakanda,” a man you don’t quite recognize says.

Okoye doesn’t hesitate. “Then it will be the noblest ending in history.”

Glancing to Steve and Bucky, then back to the barrier, you inhale sharply. “To the end of the line?”

“To the end of the line.”

[vanilladaises-rp]

Emry woke up bright and early the next morning. Well, she woke up early at least. She was less "bright" and more "drowsy" with her squinted eyes and messy morning hair. She let out a sigh as she saw the sun just starting to rise. Emry was not a morning person, despite almost always waking up early. She pulls herself out of bed and grabs the fuzzy robe off her reading chair, throwing it on over her pjs. Then, she begins to shuffle towards the kitchen. Step one of every morning is tea. The kettle gets filled with fresh water and put on the stove to heat. Emry takes to absently gazing out the back doors, still half asleep, but after a moment her brain wakes up a little more with a thought. "I wonder if any of the guys are still out there." She glances at the time on the oven. Its almost 8:00 am. Emry roams around looking for her slippers. She finds one half under the couch, and the other under the coffee table. Once the slippers are secured, she heads out the back door. Emry makes it to the middle of her yard before scanning the tree line. "Umm.. good morning?" Nothing. Not one rustle. Emry feels a little ridiculous chatting with a, potentially, empty forest, but she gives it one more shot. "Well, uh, if you are still out there, you're welcome to come in for some breakfast. Just knock on the back door." She waits a beat after speaking in case anyone emerges. No one does, so she just heads back inside. The kettle has begun to call her back anyways.

~Strawberry (man. I should just write every reply on my laptop if I write so much better lol)

The morning was very muggy, mist in the woods and the clouds completely covered the sun, it was nice. Lee know laid in the wet grass admiring the clouds, it had been awhile since he had some food. He was starving, but didn't want to move. Lee Know closed his eyes and listened to the sounds around him, hearing small creatures nearby rustle, he focused on them, their movements, their smell. Lee Know was hungry, not for a "normal" breakfast though.

Once the rodent was within view, Lee Know's eyes darken and he quietly morphed into his wolf form at the smell of the bunny rabbit. Chan's family doesn't usually hunt, at least anywhere near town but the wolf was hungry and was letting his instincts get the best of him. Lee know smirked as the poor animal moved closer, not noticing his presence. He felt a smidge of guilt for what he was about to do but was too far gone to stop himself.

In the front yard, Chan sat on the porch steps with a calm smile, taking in the morning air himself. It was so peaceful to see the trees move with the wind, listening to the small pond nearby as frogs jumped on lily pads. It was peaceful until he heard your screams. Chan's eyes widened, jumping from the stairs and into the house. He saw you stand in the kitchen, frozen still as you watched Lee Know eat the bunny live.

Chan was a bit shocked but mostly angry that his brother would do something like this in your yard, "Don't watch" He spoke softly covering your eyes from behind. He wanted to bury you in his chest but was afraid of what you might think. Of him, his brother, his family. He wanted to assure you that this wasn't a custom, that he would never do something so cruel, but he has.

(holy shit this was long im sorry 🙈 dude i feel the same! whenever i write on my laptop i feel like my responses are 10x better idk why lol 🤣)

[anthony-burchs-dog]

i gotta write a defense of gerard once we get more backstory because he was a rude child punished in a move egregiously unfair for his crime who suffered the horror and uncanniness of becoming a person growing up as a frog. eating flies, becoming an adult—going through puberty? i supposed it depends on which fairy tale you read, i remember versions where the prince and elody are vaguely teens and/or adults and at least one where they were both kids. but gerard was a child who did something assertive and loud and had his life ruined for it, and when he was saved from living as a frog, FROM DYING AS A FROG, by love and softness he became a man who only knew how to be soft and pleasure-seeking and evasive and cowardly. he was a frog! how long was he a frog! how long was he alone as a kid turned into a frog without friends or authority figures or role models to teach him how to grow up! gerard was a kid! and he’s not anymore, so it’s true, he’s gotta grow up. but i think he’s a young adult who’s still deeply in survival mode after a traumatic childhood who hasn’t even realized yet that he’s traumatized. he’s got a lot of healing to do himself. idk i love him. i want him to stay soft. i want him to become softer. i want him to be a little more aware of the world and more accommodating and connected to other people and their differences but i want him to stay a sweet-hearted, often cowardly little fool.

[lavender-annd-lilac]

Reader doesn’t hate Hal...yet, but she is very annoyed at the matchmaking that him and her father are constantly doing.  She’s not interested in Hal.

Omg now I feel rly bad for this dude bc like… u know when u are a kid and ur parents have that family friend they ask u to call uncle/aunt so and so? And they always make their kids play with u? (not necessarily for matchmaking reasons, just like, the parents want to hang out so the kids are forced to as well lol)

I remember my dad’s best friend (let’s call him Dan) had a daughter and whenever Dan came to visit or or we went to visit Dan’s family, me and the daughter (let’s call her Cindy) were told to go play. This would prob be like other other week when I was growing up.

My dad would always tell me stuff like, “oh, you should tell Cindy about your violin lessons bc she plays cello so she will be interested”, or “ask Cindy to show u what she learned in ballet class, u guys will have so much fun”, etc.

And then when Dan would visit dad, he would always be like “Cindy says hi! She’s excited to go to the movies next weekend”, blah blah blah.

So I kind of feel like these adults kind of tricked me haha by givings us both the impression that we were meant to be bff.

Since I was prob lacking a bit in the emotional intelligence department 😅 it wasn’t until we were both in high school, and I had been left on read like 800 times, and our parents stopped hanging out so much that I realized Cindy and me and were basically marionettes controlled by our parents - ie. not really friends haha 😆

For the record, Cindy was never mean or anything, even tho she had to tolerate a lot of crap from me (I wasn’t mean either, but I would always want to do role-playing games with our toys like “our frog armies ambush and eat a big horse underwater” and she was more of a jump rope/dance kind of person), but ya, in retrospect I just feel that was a shitty thing for our parents to do bc they were always encouraging us to be besties instead of just letting a natural friendship happen or not happen lol 🤷‍♀️

Anyway I guess Hal’s my dude now bc in my mind we were both unfairly spoonfed lies 🤣🤣🤣 also I always feel obliged to root for the underdog/antagonist character. Even tho this story is on like part 8? 9? rn and he might be a full on villain idk. I’ve got your back bro! Say the word and I’ll open up that portal to hell and unleash chaos on this whole town 😈

Lol jk I’m not that advanced and also would never mess w/ chaos magic like that 😵‍💫.

And she’ll rob them, and even spins them in the extractor, before she jars them up.

Me: 😖😖😖

This whole suspicious nature and the cop scenario had me rolling.  Are you wondering if this Cole is a cop, because the Cole in A Little at a Time is? 

Hahaha uh well… I’ll save this one until the end bc it’s a STORY.

Carpet in a dining area really freaks me out, but I digress. 

…🤢how is this hygienic??? Bc I feel like they aren’t giving that thing a deep steam clean every night 😬 I would literally rather have a dirt floor tbh. No amount of giant potatoes could convince me to dine in that establishment!!! But maybe I would order takeout haha

And EVERY TIME I walk into this steak house it feels like I’m stepping into 1995.  Time literally stands still.  The smell is the exact same.

U know what I actually understand this I think… there is an indoor skating rink where my parents live and it’s stayed exactly the same since I was a kid being forced to hold a pylon and skate back and forth. There’s still a donut stand and a popcorn stand lmaoo. The smell too haha. Smells are like the the strongest memories 🥲

Another odd fact, but this is in fact a local legend in my hometown.  The church.

I’m jealous!! I would love to have like a Blair Witch local legend or something near me haha 😍

Cole is a full fledged man that doesn’t know how to drink sweet tea without it running down his chin.  Or was that intentional?  You know, women sometimes like that shit.

I’ll take ur word for it hahaha 😬personally I feel like a display of coordination and fine motor skills would be more attractive but I guess I can just watch stuff like this on YouTube if I want to be impressed 🤖

she’ll be thrown in the basement.

Wait what 😰😰😰

Ok so the suspicious about cops story/rant under the cut 😬

to me any unidentified male is a Potential Cop 😂😂🤷‍♀️

Lol call me paranoid but I’ve always lived in large-ish cities where u can’t throw a rock without hitting a cop. (Ok maybe bad analogy….for the record I have never thrown rocks at cops!)

Idk if u remember when Pokémon go was a big thing and ppl (including me) were obsessed with it??

So, one night I see this chansey on my map near the church/graveyard by my apartment and it’s 3am but so what? It’s not purge night and there’s no wartime curfew or whatever so I figure I’m Gucci.

This is a chansey btw but the quote is incorrect 😅 Pokemon can only say their own names

I’m just casually walking on the sidewalk in front of the cemetery and BOOM, two big ass SUV’s with headlights like

In my face 😩😩😩and cops asking me for all kinds of info I’m not legal obligated to give them bc I’m not doing anything illegal and I’m not being arrested.

Can we see ur ID? Do u attend the university of [my city]? What program, what’s ur major? Age? Address???

So I answer their BS questions bc like… there’s 2 cops boxing me in with SUVS like I’m OJ Simpson attempting a getaway in my bronco. Except I’m on foot…and not an “alleged” murderer

When I tell them I’m just playing Pokémon go, trying to case a fairly rare Pokémon… one of these porky pigs asks me to SHOW HIM on my phone.

Dude is deadass like, oh, idk this game, can u show me?

Omg… sir… idk if u have played a video game before but like, once u catch something/defeat something, it’s done lmao

I can’t show him how I caught the Chansey bc I already caught it????

Imagine u are playing Mario and u eat the shroom that makes u taller. If someone asks u to show them, it’s like bitch I can’t! I already ate the shroom I can’t spit it out and demonstrate again that’s not how it works 🙄

So I basically tell him this but like in a more diplomatic way, and he gets super suspicious like, “oh rly, u can’t show me??? Have u had any alcohol tonight??” And still makes me hand over my phone and is like swiping around the screen and everything 😵‍💫

Finally I was like, am I being arrested?

Donut man #1: no

Me, a law abiding citizen: am I not allowed to be here? *gestures around me*

Donut man #1: I’m pretty sure it’s fine

*silence*

Me, an innocent civilian: ok well if u don’t mind I’m going to go…

Donut man #2: I think it’s rly important for you to focus on your studies and make friends you know, enjoy your freshman year

(I’m already told them I’m doing a grad degree but ok)

Me: ok… *leaves*

And that’s like, just the most recent incident 😠 soooo many times cops have just popped up outta nowhere like they don’t have actual jobs to do 😒

always male cops too. I’ve been on this accursed earth since the 1990’s and I can count on two hands how many non-traffic patrol female cops I’ve seen.

And yes, victim profiling sucks and I’m not excusing that BS …, but I might be more understanding if I was walking around looking like Edward Scissorhands.

Like, ok officer, I am openly wielding several long blades… that’s fair that you might want to ask what’s up.

In reality tho, I’m a pretty average Asian kid. I have dyed hair, but it’s not even in a cool punk ass mohawk or anything. Most of the time it’s a pastel colour like this:

(Lol not me low key showing off my colour mixing skills… I didn’t take a hairdressing course just so I could cosplay as Frenchy from Grease even if that was my primary motivation 😝)

So ya, Cole could literally have been a talking camel in the other story and I would have still been suspicious of this Cole being a cop 🤣

Stained Like Georgia Clay, Part 1

Summary:  as fate would have it, you meet someone new, just as your parents go out of town.

Pairings:  Cole Turner X Reader

Rating:  fluff

Warnings:  none yet, 18+ ONLY

Word Count:  2.3K

Series Masterlist

Keep reading

[dballzposting]

How much do you think Trunks missed Goten during GT?

He was up there in space and he didnt want to be a downer so he never said it outloud but occasionally while he was steering the ship for long periods of time in complete solitude he would think about how if they failed then the earth and the whole universe would be fucked and before their imminent demise he would have to live with Goku and Pan on some planet somewhere, or die early trying to fight whatever beast was inevitably coming their way. And well that thought just sort of sucked.

He missed everybody and everything but he missed Goten specifically in the way that cool shit would happen and he had nobody to tell it to :( he couldnt just pull out his phone and be like "Hey Goten. Youre never gonna believe this. There was this frog guy and he tried to marry me. Yeah MARRY ME. Yeah I had to dress up as a bride but it was okay because it spared a real woman from an arranged marriage with that big green thing. Yeah it was righteous of me. Yeah and then we got a dragon ball and then this OTHER GUY SHOWED UP and STOLE IT. Yeah and now we're chasing those guys. Yeah uh huh. yeah I'll let them know you said that. Yeah for sure. Okay. Take care. Bye man."

Again he didnt want to be a downer but he really missed the little things about home .... all the room to walk around in .... the nice meals ..... the sound of his mother tinkering in one of the many garages .... the sound of his father fucking shit up in the gravity chamber ..... the peace of his office (which he normally hated).... his sister's stupid Nintendogs game that she always played at full volume .....the way that he could exist without being subjected to a gas leak all day..... The sound of Goten pissing really hard in the urinal next to him (with his pants on the floor ass fully bare) and he would piss so hard that it was to the point where Trunks would often take the next urinal down becasue he was afraid of splashback .... sighhhhh.

Anyway he makes a best friend out of Giru so it's not a big deal. He comes home and is like "Hey Goten meet my new best friend" and Goten is like "haha you mean like your SPACE Best Friend right? Like the guy who is your best friend when youre space traveling but not all the time right....Your spaceship buddy right" and Trunks is like "Nope. This is my new best friend Giru :D" and then he kisses the robot deeply and with passion on its glass face and Goten is flooded with a toxic amount of jealousy so fast that his muscles and bones begin to melt and he starts shaking and he goes "haha well gimme a minute i gotta go blast ass real quick...i'll be back..." and then he runs to the bathroom and pukes his guts out.

Later he assumes that it was all a misunderstanding so he goes to talk to Trunks again and he overhears him talking to the robot and Trunks says "Youre a much better best friend than Goten. You dont pee or spit at me and you never smell like dog food. You only smell like metal and burning wires and sometimes chrome polish, and I'm into it. And you're quiet when you sleep and you actually listen to me when I talk. Also, you've forgiven me for when I had space madness and I kept trying to breastfeed you. If that were Goten instead he never would have let me live it down. He would probably keep trying to get me to do it again honestly. And honestly Giru, I would do that again for you because I have fond memories. And I love that you eat the spare nuts and screws and wires that end up at the bottom of my bags and on my floors because I dont know what to do with them otherwise. You're a real friend Giru. I love you" and again Goten has to run and limp and fall down the hall to throw up in the Capsule Corp shitters.

and idk maybe they make up. Maybe Trunks is like “Im sorry Goten I was wrong. I miss you and all of your weird smells. I miss how your flesh is fleshy and notably not metallic and how it’s wet but sometimes it’s dry instead. And I miss how you would make me do fun things with you rather than let me work on machines all day. You know Giru really just sat on my desk and watched me file papers all of Thursday and I hated it. And I miss peeing at the urinal with you. Giru doesnt pee. GIRU DOESNT PEE ! I miss you man. I’m sorry”

um this isnt what you were asking about...

[enhasfever]

𝐸𝑁𝐻𝑌𝑃𝐸𝑁 𝐴𝑆 𝐷𝐼𝑆𝑁𝐸𝑌 𝑃𝑅𝐼𝑁𝐶𝐸𝑆𝑆𝐸𝑆

➪ pairing: none

➪ genre(s): crack

➪ tw: a few swears

➪ wc: 0.7k

➪ in which your local disney enthusiast assigns a disney princess to each enhypen boy. c:

➪ heeseung — tiana (princess and the frog)

he'd definitely be unfortunate enough to have to kiss a frog

and also turn into one

then have to kiss it again in order to turn human once more

has rich friends like jay who can spoil them with nice things but would 100% still choose to eat ramen every night

has goals and is that independent bitch everyone strives to be

girlboss, gaslight, gatekeep ✨

➪ jay — aurora (sleeping beauty)

three words: predebut sleeping pics.

that's all

okay not really shush let me try to be funny

but fr he would honestly rather sleep than deal with life and people

you can't be disappointed in your dreams 😌

or maybe you can idk

he's probably screaming in his dreams at the people who cause him a great deal of stress irl

he's too busy trying to strategize how he's gonna get up to pee without waking himself up too much to get cursed

he just doesn't have time for it 😤

➪ jake — merida (brave)

okay so i couldn't think of an australian princess so he gets a scottish accent

it's the next best thing c:

avid hater of men

started an anti-man club featuring the bears that were once his family members

would literally rather fight a giant, human eating bear than get married

also he's got a bow & arrow- how much more badass can you get?

would launch arrows at anyone who came within a foot of his ramen stash

➪ sunghoon — elsa (frozen)

i think we all saw this one coming

locked himself in his room not because of his ice powers ,,

but because he was afraid that his good looks would kill everyone around him

and also he just doesn't wanna share his magic with some snot nosed younger sibling

(looking at you riki)

olaf is HIS bestie!! 🤬

would actually allow his sibling to marry someone they'd just met so he could take their room too

he'd probably turn it into an ice rink for himself

➪ sunoo — rapunzel (tangled)

if anyone is gonna knock the soul out of someone with a frying pan, it's this guy

he'd also 100% grow his hair out so he could swing around from it like tarzan

and living in isolation in a tower away from the fear of having to become riki's floor mop ??

sign him tf up

would also hoard a ton of mint choco foods up there with him to repel anyone who tried to come rescue him

he doesn't need rescued, he has 25 feet of hair! he's practically unstoppable

➪ jungwon — moana (moana)

he's literally the only person in existence who would successfully avoid getting absolutely cooked by a lava monster simply by singing to it

everyone's whipped for him ✋🏻

he may not be able to keep his plants alive but you better believe that he'll preserve a chicken with an IQ of a peanut for as long as he lives

and not to brag or anything ,,

but he would totally annihilate the coconut men that came to attack him at sea

also he'd probably just look fabulous in a grass skirt

he'd definitely pull off that island girl vibe 🌺🏝

➪ niki — vanellope (wreck-it ralph)

i am an avid believer that vanellope IS a disney princess and you can argue with the wall if you disagree

he's got that younger sibling energy that she exudes and if you don't see him in her then you're blind

i'm making your eye doctor appointment rn as you read this

he would absolutely befriend a big scary man with giant hulk hands just for the fun of it

i can also see him as a fugitive in a land full of candy and sweets

he probably accidentally ate one of the candy villagers bc he just couldn't help himself

he'd also drive like a maniac i can just feel it

© enhasfever

[enduracarrotchips]

YouTuber AU

Hello welcome to Dating Scandal but with Twitter Involved (nightmare)

A little exposition here: 

Link, Zelda, Sidon, Revali, and Riju are the most popular group of youtubers on the internet and have a huge fanbase that likes to theorize, draw fanart, and write fanfiction about them. Disclaimer, I don’t actually interact with real-person fandoms myself lol there’s just too much potential for drama and misunderstandings & they’re always bound to end in a dumpster fire but that is sort of what this au is about so.

Impa, Mipha, Daruk, and Urbosa are family friends that appear in a lot of their videos/streams. 

(This is an art blog I swear)

enter vidcon 20XX

Link: 

blows stuff up/sets stuff on fire with a side of cooking vids and gaming

most are filmed outside, he does those challenges where you try to cook stuff with limited ingredients/materials

has the largest fanbase of all of them, but not the most…intimidating.

does a lot of collab videos, mostly with Impa, Daruk, and Riju because they have similar interests/channels, but Zelda appears in his videos and is seen filming and the stans read too far into it

simps. i’m pointing at you.

Most popular videos are “shield surfing on rock!—how I broke my leg” “can Daruk eat Impa’s motorcycle?” and “how to inhale ranch dressing.”

Twitter handle is @ arsonistslullabye because he’s a hozier fan

45m subs

Zelda:

theories, analyses, conspiracies, and the occasional e x p e r i m e n t

she once got link to eat a frog for 50 bucks.

most people argue that she’s better than more popular YouTubers because she actually has quality content to give to the world and she has a lot of defensive supporters

She used to get a lot of hate before Urbosa spoke up about it and scared the bejeezus out of everyone

has an actual posting schedule

“Happy Sunday everyone, it’s Zelda Hyrule and today we will be talking about cryptozoology and why blupees exist, you cowards.”

Twitter handle is @ zeldaofhyrule and she is pan. just so you know. One of those calm extroverts that mystify me to this day.

18m subs

Sidon:

fashion/life hacks. Like gourmet troom troom but if they were real people.

Has the 2nd largest fanbase

most of them are girls

Sidon has a boyfriend though, which he told everyone at VidCon a few years ago

cue the drama and shipping and the entire fandom trying to figure out who the boyfriend is. A well known reddit thread emerged that presented the common guesses being Link, Sidon, and Zelda.

“But it can’t be Zelda, Sidon’s gay.”

“I’m not in the fandom but I thought Zelda was a boy??”

“Did you just say Sidon? Is that a typo? Are you saying that Sidon’s dating himself?”

Sidon x Sidon became a fandom joke.

Don’t look at me I’m just setting up all the worldbuilding. every fandom has their weird dark sides and Sidon x Sidon is the Linkcest of the Sidon YT fandom.

Mystery BF is actually Bazz, a pretty inconspicuous guy who appeared in a few of his videos. This was confirmed a year ago, but everyone still ships him with other YouTubers because they’re convinced he was lying to throw them off his scent. He really can’t catch a break and this is why you should not ship real people.

Twitter handle is @ officialprincesidon

says “beguiling” a lot

21m subs ᕙ( ͡❛ ▿ ͡❛)ᕗ

Mipha:

Sidon’s sister, hasn’t posted a single video but just has the channel for show because she appears in so many of Sidon’s videos as a model for his makeup tutorials and whatnot

has 328k for that. Everyone loves her, she’s great. @ mimipha

Revali:

Link’s sworn rival

Link thinks they’re friends

He kept popping up in link’s Twitter threads and making snarky comments until zelda called him out for not even following link (so why was he stalking his acc) which kept the Twitter drama to a minimum

Revali was the catalyst of a few popular memes and that’s where most of his subs come from.

drags link into a few challenges that always get a ton of views because of how competitive they get

“ITS JUST ASININE” is a running joke that everyone tries to get him to say. His @ is itsjustasinine as well

Urbosa is the only person who can win an argument with him

5m subs and growing rapidly. newer to youtube than everyone else.

Impa:

Doesn’t have a channel she’s just a mutual friend of Mipha, Zelda, and Link

Rides a motorcycle, so she is used in a few of Link’s videos.

@ ihaveamotorcycle because she thinks having a motorcycle is a personality trait. the most unruly on Twitter when it comes to replying to fan’s stuff, leaking upcoming videos and generally causing chaos.

Mipha’s girlfriend. That’s how she met Zelda and Link.

Urbosa:

Is actually a model, but she has a ton of YouTuber friends because she’s known Zelda since birth.

when she entered the youtube community she didn’t realize she would be adopting like 15 children

5m subs. her videos are professional & related to her modelling career. @ urbosasfury

I feel like she would do unboxing vids. I’m not sure what she’s unboxing.

Daruk

Just a friend of Link’s, fun guy. yells a lot. once ate a rock and had no reaction.

people are scared of him for that reason

Riju:

yoga & gymnastics & “ha look at how flexible I am its eAsY” videos

you know the type

she also does reactions and is sponsored by save the sand seals charities which she is very enthusiastic about. She’s also Urbosa’s niece and the only minor in the gang (15). I like to think that the champions YT community is actually not creepy so everyone respects her a ton

doesn’t post frequently, she mostly appears in Link’s videos to jump out of airplanes or whatever. And sometimes Zelda’s if she’s interested in the topic. 500k subs, but she’s always really popular when she appears in Link’s videos.

VidCon:

In the months leading up to VidCon, some fans on the internet made a few discoveries: first of all, that the inside of Link’s house is painted green. This is a big deal because all of his videos are filmed outside either in his backyard or on trips that he and the brosquad go on to do…whatever bros do. explosions. idk. The point is he had some announcement about VidCon and filmed it inside. Only the wall and a potted plant were shown.

However, the colour was similar to the the shade of Zelda’s living room. Fans dug through years and years of old videos and found a clip of Zelda walking through a hallway, where there was an open door and a glimpse of a houseplant.

There were 2 types of responses to the theory:

“They could just be roommates guys calm down”

“and they were ROOMMATES?”

others pointed out that Link could just not have a house and had to crash in Zelda’s

Some guy on reddit claimed he had a botany degree and declared that the houseplants in the clips were not of the same genus. Normal people pointed out that the plant would have grown 4 years between the clips and would look considerably different.

#Zelink trended on twitter for a while and people posted other old clips from both of their channels and the frog video blew up again

Impa retweeted a post tagged as #zelink with “rofl” and later publicly apologized for causing confusion.

Fans noticed that in the “can a motorcycle drive over my arm” (it was clickbait he’s fine) episode 2 years ago, Link was eating out of a paper lunch bag with his name written on it in handwriting that a few people claimed to look like Zelda’s, leading people to believe that she had packed him a lunch.

However, this theory was shot down with the counterargument that Zelda can’t cook. although. i mean how much skill do you need to make a sandwich.

No one knows what tumblr is doing at this time

Zelda wore a scarf in her “Save the Sand Seals” video that matched identically to the scarf Link wore when he travelled to Hebra to film a shield surfing video, but it’s been debated wether it’s actually the same scarf or not.

Neither Zelda nor Link has spoken up about the theories, and besides Impa’s one slip on twitter, neither has any of their friends. Zelda received a lot of backlash for the assumption that she was dating Link because he has a lot of delusional fans that didn’t want her to “steal their man” or whatever the hell that type of fan would get mad about

Oh yea and bolson & karson run a zelink fanpage on twitter sorry I forgot about that

after that whole mess, everyone was even more anticipant of VidCon in the hopes that some of their questions would be answered.

The whole batch went to VidCon this year: Link, Impa, Daruk, and Riju are a gang while Sidon and Mipha go together and Zelda & Revali each go separately. Urbosa is there for supervision moral support

Zelda has always been much better at dodging questions that she doesn’t want to answer than anyone else, so her Q&A went without a hitch. When asked to confirm the rumours she said “which one?” and then moved on to the next question (without actually confirming any rumours).

Link is generally a more awkward person but eventually said that he had filmed the video in Zelda’s house because it was nicer and didn’t realize it would cause such an uproar. Fans were disappointed, but Bolson claimed he saw Link and Zelda exiting the hotel elevator on the same floor after Link’s Q&A session. No one believed him.

Fans went back to theorizing over who Link, Zelda, and Sidon were all dating, because apparently they can’t just be dating unknown people and have to be with other YouTubers

Sidon and Bazz got engaged about a week after VidCon, making at least 4 preteen girls cry

actually try 4 million

Sidon x Sidon made a brief comeback but Sidon spoke up about his fandom for the first time ever on twitter and told everyone that no, he was not dating himself. eventually, everyone settled down and accepted that none of them were in a relationship save for a few loud fans.

Link and Zelda still got the occasional “when will you tell us who you’re dating?” comment but most of them were joking and the people who still hardcore shipped them were generally frowned upon. Zelda’s popularity went up after VidCon and she regained the 200k subscribers she’d lost after the first theory dropped.

Two months after VidCon, Link posted a video titled “Zelda and I’s House Tour!” and gave around 45 million people a heart attack

as revealed in the video, they had actually been dating since they were 16 and everyone’s just a fool.

the potted plant is named Hestu.

[lazywonderlvnd]

if you ever take prompts would you ever write harry as a himbo? disgustingly charming, kind and respectful to women BUT stupid. and draco is all "you're so stupid its so hot take off your trousers"

this is literally so funny im shaking. i tried to keep harry as ic as possible idk ytfsugeruahes i’m rly dying tho. living for these rare tropes keep em coming. hope u enjoy anon ❤️

“Can I get two cranberry vodkas?”

“Vodka cranberries,” grunted the surly bartender, unmoving. Harry’s eyebrows came together, obviously confused. Draco sighed and tried not to sound too fond.

“No,” said Harry. “Cranberry vodkas, I mean. The flavoured kind.”

“Harry,” said Draco, putting a hand on his arm, “it’s not flavoured vodka. It’s vodka and cranberry juice, he just means it’s typically called --” But he stopped trying, because Harry had an eyebrow raised and looked unimpressed with the explanation. He turned to the bartender. “Two vodka cranberries. Thank you.”

“What’s the difference?” Harry said when the man behind the bar had turned away to get their drinks. Had they been at a wizarding pub this wouldn’t have happened -- people didn’t talk to Harry that way. This Muggle clearly just thought he was a moron, which might have been true in a number of ways but it was always so very endearing.

“That’s just what it’s called,” Draco explained, grinning. He touched a kiss to Harry’s cheek. “People are quite touchy about terminology.”

“Whatever,” said Harry. “I thought it was flavoured vodka, that makes more sense.”

“No, honey,” said Draco kindly. “It’s cranberry juice, that’s why it’s red.” He took the drinks as Harry passed the bartender his Muggle money, telling him to keep the change to pay for a couple girls’ drinks that were ordering. They giggled and fluttered their lashes at him, not knowing he had no interest, he was just Harry, being an absolute gentleman came naturally to him.

They took their drinks outside, Draco privately hoping the cool autumn air would lower his body temperature a little bit (Harry’s shameless idiocy always, unfailingly, made him hot under the collar, he didn’t for the life of him know why), and no sooner had Harry pulled out a cigarette than he’d stuck it absent-mindedly in his mouth the wrong way and lit the filter.

“Fuck, shit,” Harry muttered, plucking it out from between his lips and, with a roll of his eyes, chucking it perfectly into a bin some ten feet away. “Why do I do that every time?”

Draco, half-hard, watched him light another and then took it when Harry offered it to him. He lit another for himself, looking completely, mind-meltingly hot for no reason at all as he checked to make sure he was doing it the right way.

“Oi, could we bum a couple of those?” a woman asked, the high trill of her voice indicating she was properly sloshed.

“Oh, yeah, absolutely,” said Harry, hurrying to take the last two out of his pack and handing them to the woman and her friend. He then used his little Muggle contraption to light both of them up, oblivious to the way they looked at him with hungry eyes.

“Thanks so much,” the woman’s friend said, but when Harry only gave them a charming little smile and nod before turning back to Draco they took the hint and walked off, looking slightly crestfallen. Draco clenched his teeth and reminded himself he was not allowed to drag Harry into a bathroom stall to ravish him.

“I was thinking for Ron’s birthday,” said Harry, looking at once moronic and attractive holding his cigarette with his thumb and index finger like it was a joint, “he’s always threatening to eat his body weight in things. I wanna get him, like ... I dunno, his body weight in Chocolate Frogs or something. How would we calculate, like, how much his body weight would be in Chocolate Frogs?”

Draco took a moment to suck in a crisping lungful of smoke, telling himself again, over and over, he couldn’t drag Harry into the loos, he couldn’t do that, it was illegal ...

“Do you have any idea?” Harry pressed. “Maybe I should just ask Hermione.”

“Harry,” Draco said, stubbing out his cigarette. “D’you know how much Ron weighs?”

“Yeah.”

“Then you know how much he weighs in Chocolate Frogs,” he said, taking Harry’s cigarette and putting that out too. Harry looked at him, confused, as Draco took his hand, feeling very resigned, and began leading Harry towards the bathrooms.

“Wait, what?” Harry said, and then, “Where are we going?”

Draco shoved him into the bathroom and manually did the lock.

“There’s no calculation, Harry,” said Draco. He pushed him back against a wall and pulled open the zipper of his windbreaker. Harry looked more bemused than ever. “Whatever his weight is, that’s also his weight in Chocolate Frogs.”

And finally understanding dawned in Harry’s eyes. “Oh!” he exclaimed, looking excited. “Right, yeah, that makes sense!”

“God, you’re so dumb,” Draco muttered, and started fumbling with his trousers.

[akaashigiri]

Sleepy Jaegers

summary: eren and y/n are at a gathering at armin’s place, and their 2 year old is exhausted. eren is equally as exhausted.

pairing: dad!eren jaeger x fem!reader

word count: 1.69k

warnings: none, fluffff

a/n: sigh my baby fever possessed me to write this 💔 might make armin a father as well if people end up liking this one (i will anyway) 😋

These gatherings were almost like a ritual to the group.

There wasn’t ever a specific place they met, they would always gather in different places, wether it’d be the beach, a park, or at one of their homes. It didn’t matter where it took place, just as long as everyone was there. Everyone was obligated to come.

So of course that includes the littlest Jaeger.

It was mid September, and although the weather wasn’t bad at all, some didn’t really feel like going out to public places like the local park, so the group decided on Armin’s new place, since Sasha and Annie still have yet to see it (their homes are farther from the rest)

They were all gathered in the spacious living room; Jean and Sasha on the long couch, while Mikasa and Armin sat on the smaller one. Historia and Ymir shared the beige-colored chair in the corner of the room, while Annie sat on one of the kitchen stools as she watched Y/N and Connie do the dishes (Armin insisted, but the two almost threatened him if he were to touch a dish).

As soon as Eren walked in, he all but restricted anyone from sitting on the big beige reclining sofa, claiming that he deserved it for helping Armin pick it out. Eren was grateful for going to Ikea that day with Armin to pick out the sofa he was now slouched on, recliner out and all. It was now his favorite spot in the whole house (besides the kitchen, since he loved playing around with the smart refrigerator).

As Y/N passed another dish for Connie to rinse and dry, she suddenly felt a tug on her pants, looking down to meet the tired eyes of her daughter.

She was quick to rinse and dry her hands to pick her up, giving all of her attention to the little girl. “Aw, what’s wrong Mimi? Everything alright?” She asked, already noticing the fatigue on her face.

She only snuggled into her mother’s neck, giving her the simple response of, “Tired.” Her vocabulary was fairly short, due to the fact that she was only 2 and learned her words from the ones around her (Eren got in big trouble the day Y/N heard the word ‘shit’ come out of her daughter’s mouth).

Y/N wasn’t surprised she got tired easily today, since Jean gave her more candy then Y/N would usually allow. And with the way her, Ymir, and Mikasa were running around in the yard earlier today, Y/N already saw this coming.

“You’re tired?” she asked again, earning a nod from the crook of her neck. “Okay, mommy’s almost done. Go sit next to daddy until I finish, okay?” She tells her, moving her head back to face her daughter again. Myra nodded, allowing her mother to put her down.

Walking tiredly, Myra slowly moved through the kitchen and made her way to the living room, spotting her father laidback in the corner of the room, limbs sprawled out on the sofa.

Eren wasn’t sure if it was the father instincts, but he was the first to notice her presence in the room, stopping the ghost story Jean swears is real to bring his full attention to his daughter.

“Mimi’s come to save us, everyone!” Eren exclaims, throwing jazz hands up as everyone joined and cheered her on for simply walking in. Jean didn’t like what Eren was implying, but clapped nonetheless.

“You’re not funny. Aren’t dads supposed to tell good jokes?” He questioned, attempting to steal a fry from Sasha’s plate, but failing miserably as she only swats his hand away.

“No Jean, I think it’s the other way around, they’re supposed to be corny.” Armin butts in, watching with a smile as Myra finally starts walking towards her father.

Eren could already see the fatigue on her face, holding his arms out for her once she got a little closer. “What’s up Mimi, you tired?” Eren questioned, laughing as she instead of answering, simply lifted her arms up for him to take her.

She responds with a nod, her hair falling over her face as she was lifted onto his lap. As soon as she was situated, she wasted no time in making herself comfortable, wiggling out of her dad’s grasp and laying her stomach down on his, her head right above where his heart was.

“Nevermind.” he sighs, making the whole room burst out into laughter. This only made Myra whine, the loudness distrupting her attempt at sleeping. “Sorry Myra!” Sasha whispered, finally giving a fry to Jean afterwards.

“I wonder what got her so tired.” Annie questions, making Jean sink into the couch out of guilt as Eren sends him an irritated glance.

“Jean went and gave her a sugar rush before we got here. It was absolute hell.” Eren’s eyes furrow in frustration as he remembers earlier today and how hard it was for him to catch a nap without his energetic 2 year old jumping all over him. All while Jean was happily eating lunch with his wife.

“Okay, but I didn’t know she wasn’t supposed to have that much candy! Kids eat candy like crazy, right?” He attempts to defend himself, looking around the room for support, only to be met with silence.

“Yeah, thing is she’s not a kid! She’s a toddler! Dumbass.” he mumbles the last part, hoping that Y/N somehow wouldn’t hear. But she always found a way how.

“Can someone please slap Eren for me?” She yells from the kitchen. “Stop cursing in front of Myra!”

Eren has no time to defend himself as volunteers step up to do what their friend asked, but Mikasa was the quickest, and Eren was even quicker. He swiftly grabs Myra’s frog blanket from the bag sat beside him and hids his face in it, saving it from the harsh blow of Mikasa’s hand.

“You’re lucky I didn’t miss completely, I just don’t wanna wake Myra.” she confesses, walking back to her seat.

“God, I cant believe we almost named her after you.” Eren groaned, blanket still clutched in hand.

“Mimi’s close enough for me.” She smiles, noticing the way Myra starts to squirm a bit. “Throw the blanket over her, I think she’s cold.” She suggests, bringing Eren’s attention back to the little girl on his chest.

Eren is quick to unravel the rather big blanket from his grasp and take it in both hands to bring it in the air, watching it fall perfectly onto her small figure. The blanket basically covered his whole torso, the end tickling his neck a bit.

“Thanks again for the blanket, Historia. She loves it so much, a little too much.” he says, feeling his daughter move under the blanket so that her little arms were wrapped around his torso as far as she could go. “She won’t use the one I got her anymore.” he says with a slight frown.

The group laughs again, but quietly this time, not wanting the little girl to possibly wake up in a fit.

“I wouldn’t blame her, to be honest.” Jean shrugs, giving Eren a knowing glance, as well as a sly smirk. He knows how mad Y/N would get if he were to disobey her, especially a few minutes after she scolded him. Since Y/N was only a few feet away, Eren aggresively sticks his middle finger up to the man. It’s not like Myra could see through the blanket anyway.

“Are you gonna finish your ghost story, Jean?” Annie asked, although she didn’t believe a word. She just wants to see him make a fool out of himself.

Jeans eyes light up, snapping his fingers together as he sits upstraight again, ready to go into full detail once again. “Right! Okay, okay, so right when I went to shave my beard...”

Eren let’s Jean’s apparent ghost encounter story fade in the background, focusing on the shallow breaths coming from his daughter. He felt himself getting a little drowsy himself, as if her sleepiness was seeping into him.

He doesn’t waste time lifting the blanket a bit to wrap a protective arm around her small figure under it, adjusting his posture on the sofa and crossing his ankles over one another. His let his neck sink into the back of the couch, letting his head go as well so he facing the ceiling. With the warmth of the blanket and the little girl under it, he couldn’t help but close his drowsy eyes as well, finally giving in.

A few minutes pass and Jean is done telling his story, but of course, no one believes him. All except Historia. “Thank you, Historia! See I’m telling the truth. Morons.” Jean rolls his eyes at the way Armin and Sasha curl up as they laughed, Mikasa and Annie trying their best to hold in theirs.

Jean soon notices the person who would’ve regurlarly had the most to say was being awfully quiet. Getting ready to scold him for not listening, Jean is met with a site he has to admit, is the cutest thing he’s seen all year.

Eren was deep in slumber, soft snores coming from him and the little girl that rested as peacefully as he did on top of him. The print of his arm around her could be seen through the green blanket, as well as both of their steady breaths. They looked so comfortable, it would be a pain for them to get up soon, which they would have to eventually.

“Awww, they’re adorable!!” Historia exclaims from the other side of the room, which seemed to catch Y/N’s attention all the way from the kitchen.

“What’s happening? Is something cute happening? Someone take pictures!” She exclaimed, wanting to abandon the plates and take them herself, but thinks that would be rather rude to leave poor connie alone.

“On it!” Sasha and Jean say in unison. Both are quick to pull out their phones, Jean getting the more unappealing angles, while Sasha actually put some effort into it and snapped a few photos.

These were being sent to every single person on her contact list.

this was written at like 2 am sorry if there are typos i swear i reread 💔

also i’m currently working on a mob fic idk if ppl still like those but i most definitely do so watch out for that one :p

hope y’all liked this one lol

-aysha <3

[brb-screaming-over-amphibia]

Theories +Wishlist for s3

(these were made before the sneak peak and poster so some is confirmed/non-canon sorry!) Theories:

-I’m thinking that the first ep of Amphibia will have the Plantar family trying to cheer up Anne/get her mind off of things for a bit by going to places she likes (but they keep backfiring bc they’re places she, Sasha, and Marcy all went to) -At the end though, it has Anne find a way to really talk about how she’s feeling and acknowledge that one fun trip to the mall isn’t going to solve everything and that she’s still going to have moments where she’s sad and dealing with her grief but she can always count on her family and friends to be there for her when she needs them -(+ a bonus: don’t forget to live in the moment and appreciate what you have right now moments bc I feel like that’s a huge theme that will be there throughout the season)

-Sasha’s parents are neglectful (I’m thinking they might be rich and busy so that’s why, possibly controlling too), I just think it makes a lot of sense regarding her personality and attitude  -them being divorced would make sense too!

-Beach episode!!! BEACH EPISODE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (maybe have parallels to Best Fronds???? 👀)

-An episode where Anne tries to find a way to control/channel her powers and at the end a huge attack or something big happens and the Plantars are in danger so she activates them instinctively and figures out how activate them at will

-The Plantars being confused about the names of places (Sprig: ”The Big Apple? But there’s no Big Apple?? And you thought Wartwood was a weird name!”)

-Frobo coming back bc OFC HE IS but i still feel like something bad will happen to him like i feel like there’s some kinda catch but,,,,idk man,,,,,let the big metal baby man be happy and okay -polly saving the day with her legs!!! like,,,,who knows what she can do now,,,,,,,with all this,,,,,,,,,,power,,, -for the christmas ep: maybe Anne missing her friends and wishing they were there? i feel like they probably spent every christmas together ;;; and maybe! sprig and the fam is trying to take her mind off of it! -anne using up her powers and the frog fam + her parents (maybe, depends on when they find out) having to remind her that she’s just a kid and she needs to rest too!!!! set boundaries!!!!!  -and on that topic, i feel like anne would blame herself for a lot of what happened too and she keeps pushing herself to save everyone because she couldn’t save Marcy and Sasha but a core theme of the season is to accept that it wasn’t your fault and responsibility (kinda contrasting earlier lessons in s1 and 2 where it was the opposite) and her frog fam + parents (??) will have to help her learn this lesson -IDK THIS IS A LOOSE IDEA but what if!!! Anne has healing powers!!! It’d match her nature aesthetic and also help with the final battle?? Maybe its easier to heal herself than others????? -anne is more protective of sprig + frog fam (??) bc of true colors?? if they do this i will cry

Wishlist:

-more flashbacks of the trio!!! pls!!!! 

-flashback of Anne meeting Marcy for the first time?? PLEASE???

-BABY PICTURES OF ANNE!!!! PLS!!!

-Anne going through the five stages of grief (i think if this were to happen, it’d be very subtle but it’d be good to teach to people that it’s okay and that people will mourn in different ways and for different amounts of time!)

-I do love the Sasha’s hair au where she cuts it off Mulan style bc HAIR SYMBOLISM!!! but i still really like the hair she has right now ;;  I’d be happy either way though!

-reoccurring gags with the Plantar family meeting real frogs,,,there’s so much potential,,,,,

-LIKE WHAT IF SPRIG ADOPTED A FROG DJFGHSJD (this would be such a weird Goofy and Pluto situation djfgsdjhfgsdj)

-Marcy being freed not too late into the season!! I miss her and I don’t want to see her having a lot less screentime ;;;; (this is rough bc of pacing and stuff like that, I feel like i’d be happy if she was in 7 eps, in person)

-Anne using humor to cope with her TRAUMA (F)

-Anne getting THERAPY BC SHE NEEDS IT

-Anne missing eating bugs in her food (IT’D BE SUCH A FUNNY REOCCURING GAG)

-Flashbacks or family pictures or SOMETHING, ANYTHING regarding Sprig and Polly’s parents!

-The Plantar’s having a way to be able to see Anne regularly after they head home!! BC OTHERWISE I WON’T BE OKAY

-the iconic picture of the trio coming back up again! its been a HOT MINUTE since we’ve seen it and i’d LOVE to see it used in a SUPER emotionally charged scene like!!! what if!!! it was able to bring back Marcy from her possessed form!!!!! 

-flashback scenes in the finale detailing all of anne + marcy + sasha’s adventures showing how much this whole ordeal has changed them and those around them!!! i will cry!!!!

-Valeriana coming back to help anne and the trio!!!! heck, a ton of the people who anne helped throughout the show coming back to help her!!!!! I WILL SOB!!!!!!

-MORE OF HOP POP CALLING ANNE HIS GRANDDAUGHTER/FAMILY I WILL LIE ON THE FLOOR AND SOB -anne’s mom mothering sprig and polly BC THEY NEVER HAD THAT AND THEY DESERVE IT, I WILL ABSOLUTELY BREAK  D O W N -MORE YOUNG ANNE AND HER PARENTS FLASHBACKS/MENTIONS/PICTURES!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -NEW OUTFITS FOR ANNE/THE TRIO??? i just want the good fanart please -also, sprig coping with his homesickness with Anne and them comforting each other bc they now both know how each other feel ;;;; (also sprig’s probably worried about wartwood and everyone in amphibia bc of Andriass so hah a  that’s great) -BABY DOMINO???????? FLASHBACK TO ANNE FINDING DOMINO??????????? FLASHBACK ABOUT DOMINO MISSING ANNE EPISODE?????????????? those will all kill me instantly, without fail -i would LOVE to have at least a moment where Anne’s mom talks about how it was like before Anne came back, i mean!!! it’s been almost 6 months!!!!! poor thing!!! -IVY AND SASHA BECOMING BESTIES!!!!! IT’D COMPLETE THE FROG TRIO BESTIE TEAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -the calamity trio patching up each others’ wounds, idk if this could happen but i just WANT IT (fan content is okay too 👀) -more owl house references, thank you

[blackberry-gingham]

ooh, def Toad!!🐸

Bless you 😭😭😭 also tagging @samatedeansbroccoli since she asked for the same character 😩

Favorite thing:

Probably his severe underdog status tbh. I am not joking when I say that literally no one genuinely likes this man or even gives him the time of day in the Marvel universe.

Which is just amplified when we consider that he's actually extremely powerful, assuming we take his toad powers to their logical and scientific conclusions and all

Least favorite thing:

Dnsjskskak the way that his creators can't settle on one design for him and so he constantly swings between "ok looking at best" to "literally the most hideous, uncanny thing you've ever seen in your life" 😭

Favorite line:

At the tail end of his run in the wolverine X-Men school comic, as he's being exiled for helping Paige do her nefarious stuff and the others are like "was it worth it" or whatever and he says

"All I did, I did for love"

Like..... Bro. Ouchie.

Especially when you consider that Toad's idea of love is kind of warped in that he is just soooo easy to take advantage of. Like, he's a willing dependent in a codependency relationship. He'll do literally anything you ask... Just as long as you at least pretend to give even a fraction of a fuck about him.

So all that to say, that while he may feel his actions are justified bc "he did it for the woman he loves" and all... That's really not even the case tbh, bc he never seemed to be truly loved by her in the first place.

But also in the invasive species mission in contest of champions during the little dialogue transmission, ronin is like "time to die, frog man" or whatever and toad is like "hey fuck you, that guys not like me, he's just a guy in a suit"

AND HES FUCKING RIGHT LMAOOOOO

Idk, not super profound or anything, but genuinely made me laugh so it deserves a spot

brOTP:

Oof, once again, Toad is another guy who doesn't really have friends lol. I'd say him and Spiderman tbh.

Two dudes who are losers irl, but also super smart and all that. They can commiserate over their girl troubles, I'm sure

OTP:

Me again, lmao. I will give him true love 😌🤲🏻

nOTP:

Probably like.... Magneto or something. Ugh, that's so foul. Just the concept hurts to type 😭

Random HC:

I'm trying to think of something I haven't said already lmao

Uuuuuh, he basically starts to fall apart once he hits middle age tbh, lol. He just wants to retire and live a normal life with his s/o after like... 43. Eating bugs starts to give him really bad heartburn and he really hates to crouch down and do that toad hop thing he's known for.

Age and dad bod weight come together for pretty shitty back pain afterwards if he does it for too long.

Unpopular opinion:

Well, there's not really many people to pitch against for me to even have a truly "unpopular opinion" tbh 😂😂😅

But I guess I'd say Todd kind of annoys me tbh. I think it's his diction style more than anything tho, so 😭 That, and it's like... I get why he's more of a popular choice in fanfictions, but also.... Idk. What about the og tho 😭😭

Song I associate:

Probably listen up by Oasis off of the very excellent The Masterplan album. One bc I just associate Liam Gallagher and his voice and image so hard with Mort, but also the mood is right and the lyrics are accurate.

That and the titular song off that same album. The Masterplan, the song, is sung by Noel, Liam's brother, but idk. I really love his voice for like.... Adult Toad.

The first is more about making up your mind to be your own man, even if it means you have to go at life on your own.

The second has a lot more to unpack tbh lmao, but basically it ties into the idea that "the plan for life is that there is no plan" and while that may sound scary, and sure it can be... But we should also realize the potential it has in that good things can happen too, even when we don't expect them.

Favorite picture:

Lmao am I wrong to post one of my drawings 😭

I'd say I'm caught between this panel of the comic, bc like.... W I D E. Plus, canon dad bod confirmed lmao

And this scene from days of future past just bc I literally died like LMAO. Even in an alternate universe, this man is forced into a crummy job. That, and the fact that a man who's poisonous enough to take out literally anyone in an actual fucking heartbeat...

Is cooking FOOD and with no gloves or anything. Like.... This is such an absolutely God tier FDA violation 😭😭

[vagrantblvrd]

But also the time Anakin didn’t fall but became the Emperor after those pesky Jedi killed Palpatine.

Before they could be all hurray, the evil’s been defeated!!1! \o/ someone realizes just how deeply entrenched Palpatine’s Empire is in the Galactic Republic and whatnot and they should maybe do something about that?

And what with Palpatine being dead it only makes sense for his ~padawan, whatever his name was to assume the title and so you get Darth Vader as the new Emperor.

(So badly injured in his battle to protect the Emperor he’s forced to wear this special suit with a rad helmet and anyway, very Darth Vader of him.)

Rumors say Vader was a close friend of Anakin’s until Palpatine turned him to the Dark Side. Vader lived, but Anakin...didn’t, or so the rumors go.

Makes for a good story, though. Vader vowing to destroy everyone Anakin loved and whatnot in revenge for killing his master, so of course Oni-Wan spirits Padme off to Alderaan to keep her safe. She has the twins there and pledges to destroy the Empire by siding with the Rebel Alliance, and anyway.

Makes for a good story, you know?

Meanwhile Anakin and a few trusted people who know the truth work to dismantle the Empire, quietly horrified at how large it is and how did all of them miss this?

Also the whole Order 66 business Palpatine never gets the chance to issue, but is a Concern with the clones, the 501rst sticking with Anakin because they’re convinced the man cannot be allowed out without supervision, supposedly ~evil Emperor or not.

And of course, you know, the Anakin’s former Jedi master determined to stop the man who killed his padawan, and becomes Vader’s Arch Nemesis.

There’s this whole cat and mouse thing between them where Anakin manages to catch him every so often.

Everyone aboard the Emperor’s ship not in the know is like :O because you just know he’s torturing information about the Rebels and Skywalker’s family - what better revenge than to take Ankin’s children as his pupils? - out of him and everyone knows the Emperor is very thorough.

But really, it’s like, omg, Obi-Wan could you maybe be less dramatic and Anakin you have no room to talk, and also, Padme and the twins say hi.

And then Plotting to destroy the Empire from within and it goes a bit faster, what with Anakin being the Emperor and all? But there’s so much to do and he’s so tired, and misses his wife and kids.

The only thing Obi-Wan can do is bring little recorded holo messages from Padme and the twins, in code and careful not to look suspiciously like letters to Anakin, and they both pretend this isn’t the worst thing that’s ever happened to them.

Also, also.

That time someone got it into their heads to jut up and kill Skywalker’s family to curry favor with the Emperor’s and almost succeeded.

No one knowing where Luke was for ages until Boba Fett demanded an audience with the Emperor. Said he had information on something he was sure the Emperor would be interested to hear and anyway.

Anakin meets with Boba Fett who has a little Mandalorian beside him and Anakin almost gives everything away on the hangar deck because it’s Luke.

Safe and sound and the moment they’re somewhere safe, the only ones around who know the truth, Anakin is hugging Luke so hard and Luke has grown up in the - has been a year? more? - time since the attack, and oh, he needs to tell Padme, tell Leia and the others.

(But you know, just a little longer like this.)

There’s no safe way to get Luke back to Padme and others without risking exposing everything they’ve sacrificed for, so Luke ends up staying with Anakin.

By pretending to be a foundling Boba Fett’s taken in, and it’s just.

The next time he captures Obi-Wan and Obi-Wan stops laughing (that or cry and he’d rather not) he looks at Luke in his armor - it suits him oddly enough - and this gruff bounty hunter that Anakin’s kid charmed the hell out of enough for him to risk going to the Emperor and anyway.

The Emperor’s pet bounty hunters (and secret bby!Jedi) and, uh yes.

That goes on for a few years, Boba’s foundling turning into a truly terrifying bounty hunter in his own right and whispers saying Vader should replace Fett with the younger one, but he doesn’t. Perhaps waiting for the foundling to do it on his own, who knows.

Also that time Boba and Luke ran into Din somewhere and Boba Fett is like oh no, because Anakin’s going to kill him and also Din is an idiot and he never wanted this okay, never.

(There’s this whole Thing before this, though, misunderstandings and trying to kill one another before Din realized wait, not the bad guys??? And also oh, no, because Luke’s face, okay. Very nice.)

And yet here he is, bringing these idiots back to the Emperor’s ship and sure he’s about to get sighed at so much because Anakin, and really, idk.

Because Luke and Din and Adventures while Boba was negotiating a job, and who the hell told Din he was an adult when he thinks being swallowed whole by a krayt dragon is a sound strategy???

Also that time with this small village of shrimp farmers and the bandits with an AT-ST and anyway.

Anakin’s going to kill him.

One good thing out of dragging the two of them around with him is that he gets Fennec on his side, , the only actual adult around for parsecs.

Although, okay, Luke learning sniping from her (among other deadly things) is terrifying considering what a good shot he already was.

(Boba pretends he doesn’t see the way Din looks at Luke when he’s shooting, pretends he knows nothing of the way Luke looks at Din when he so much as breathes, and why, why, was he cursed to have Skywalkers in his life again?)

But, okay, but.

At some point they get to where they can break the hold the Empire has over the galaxy, weakened it enough it cant go to ground, nurse its wounds and come back again, and Skywalkers you know?

Dramatic bastards.

This whole thing where the Emperor’s pet bounty hunters turns against him, team up with the Rebels and Kenobi and Tano, and anyway.

Vader dies on the bridge of his ship and it’s all the newsfeeds and whatnot talk about for weeks, months, later.

Don’t even notice when a man who looks like Anakin Skywalker might have if he’d lived, gotten older, goes to Alderaan or wherever the two of them went to see Padme and Leia, a trio of Mandalorians with him, and anyway.

Yes.

But also, also.

Luke and Din showing up wherever Anakin ends up a few years down the road with this Grogu character, and all, “Hey, dad, guess who we found?”

(Shhh, Anakin’s  supposed to be dead, and it’s very tragic, really, how Padme visits so often to lay flowers on his grave and honor his memory and honestly, it’s beautiful in a way, don’t you think?)

Because years and years of conflict and opportunists and worse and someone got to Grogu before they could be stopped, but it’s okay now because he has two dads who wear shiny armor and also have lightsabers -

“Wait, wait,is that the Darksaber? Does Obi-Wan know about this?

- and let him eat all the frogs he wants, it’s awesome.