#idk if we're in the WE'RE SO BACK phase but. we're out of the IT'S SO OVER for sure

[neverendingford]

.

[ciraeus]

I think we'll be okay lads

[anaalnathrakhs]

hjgjhggjgjgh forgot i can't even go to the psych ward if there was magically room for my non urgent case. my mom's birthday is this weekend, and my aunt and grandma stay at our house for the following week. i need to be there for the birthday, and then i have to seem normal and present at normal hours. AND THEN IT'S THE HOLIDAYS.

[alittlebitofrainbyyourside]

Fopps was like 'why have you removed yourself from 90% of your social spaces' and I do not know how to explain that like... it's not that anyone has upset me or that like- Okay, there is an element of like 'the way I care about people is wrong and I am a terrible human being for leading everyone on' but that's like- complicated and more fleeting. 90% of it is absolutely just 'if you give me a captive audience, I will trauma dump rn.' tumblr is mostly safe rn because I frequently forget that I have the ability to make posts and not just reblog things.

[avornalino]

DATE WENT WELL IM HAPPY YO REPORT !!

finally moved into my dorm and my roommates are nice (so far) and i have a date (kinda?) today at 4 life is good!

[hibiscusseaart]

So about Time Travel Tobirama

He gets back in his childhood, the period when Kawarama was already dead, but Itama still alive, just cuz I like Itama alive and well, ok. (also i love the idea of Itama the weed shinobi by @oh-no-its-bird so)

And he starts to think and strategise smth like "Ok, I need to kill Black Zetsu, but idk where he is. But he should be around Uchihas, so I must come closer. But I cant just go there, we're not in peace, they'd kill me. And I don't exactly know when Black Zetsu is gonna try to manipulate Madara. So I also have to monitor Madara and make sure Izuna doesn't ever dies, to ensure that Madara won't lose his shit".

So, he's really logical and his conclusion was "So the easiest way to monitor the Uchiha clan is to marry an Uchiha." But he can't just marry a random Uchiha, it'd be shitty for politics he is the clan heir after Hashirama after all + it'd be nice way to strengthen peace via marriage. Plus he needs to keep close eye to Madara. So. Marrying Madara it is. Or Izuna. But first of all, Izuna is annoying and second he still needs very carefully look for potential signs of Black Zetsu corruption and it's better to do that when they're in close quarters. So the best case scenario is Madara's hand in marriage.

Killing Madara might be easier, but Hashirama would be sad. Plus I think the ppl who helped him to be sent in the past (coughnaruto who said that) told him smth about that Madara and Hashirama are Indra and Ashura reincarnations and be like "What if daddy Sage gets angry..."

So yeah no killing Madara. Even though he kinda wants to.

And to be clear, he had this plan in the few days he's back in his baby body. He's like 10-12 or whatever, when Hashi starts running to the river to meet Madara. Oh and Itama is safe and sound cuz Tobi said fuck Butsuma and went to safe his baby brother.

So one day Tobirama follows his brother to the river to actually meet Madara before his father decides to fuck everything.

So, Tobirama's the most fucked up honeypot mission officially begun. Tobirama is gonna be like "Ok i need to impress a 12 yo... But I cant just show him a cool jutsu, he might think about me as a rival or whatever... Kids like praise and cool things... Maybe I can tell him that he's cute and find him a cool stick? Should I ask Anija to make a cool stick?"

He meets Madara (without a stick, Hashirama might've suspect smth) and be like "Wow, Anija who would've known you've made such a cute friend" (Tobirama is hard cringing in his head, he's not the best in honeypot missions) and Madara, being about 12 year old, is standing there covered in mud, cuz Hashirama threw him into river or whatever + the little hc that he's kinda ugly when he's in his teens. Like Madara thinks of himself as strong and cool, but not particularly handsome with his wild hair and eye bags.

So Madara is smitten cuz wow pretty boy with red eyes said that He's cute!!!

Tobirama looks at Madara's dopey smile and thinks of the first phase as a success. Now Tobirama starts to spend some time with Hashirama and Madara to monitor their surroundings from their clans, while Itama distracts their father, and also try to win over Madara when he is still an impressionable kid. Plus he starts hinting that they may be Senju and Uchiha and that they should be prepared. But well they're kids who wants to escape all that war and just play with a peer so.

Long story short, Madara be like "So we're gonna make a village and then I'm gonna marry Tobirama!"

Tobi "fuck yes, a bit ahead of the schedule, but sounds good, i'm in"

Hashirama is outraged bc THATS HIS LIL BROTHER!!!

So Tobirama plays hard and makes Madara promise to marry him when they're old enough.

But then well, they're still found out and they still have a fallout cuz of their clans. But Tobirama made them promise to try hard for peace (and marriage), so now they just have to wait til Butsuma dies and Hashirama can become a clan head.

Tobirama tries not to be so efficient at killing Uchihas cuz he will be their family later so he tries to avoid it and just knock out or use some non lethal methods. Hashirama mostly fights Madara and it's almost sparrings at this point. Itama works on his weed empire and learns healing.

Well one day Butsuma dies and Hashirama and Tobirama bully their Elders and rush to try for peace. Tajima (who I think is still alive) is suspicious of all of it and stalls af.

So one day on the battlefield Tobirama says "So, marriage when? You promised asshole", making all the Uchiha and Senju stumble and "HUH?!"

So now many of the Senju and Uchiha now know that Uchiha clan heir apparently proposed to the Senju heir ??? Everyone is confused.

Madara, still crushing hard on Tobirama, catches this opportunity and bullies everyone to allow peace and let him marry Tobirama. Uchiha allow it only cuz everyone knows how crazy Uchihas about loved ones and Madara is the strongest one. They kinda afraid that if they won't allow it, he'd go crazy (he would).

So Madara gets his trophy wife Tobirama, Tobirama gets his safari zone with Uchihas in their natural habitat.

Tobirama is a surprisingly good husband to Madara, cuz with all that Zetsu thing, he's attentive as hell. "Something bothering you, dear husband? Do tell me everything."

At first they think he'd learn things and will tell that all back to Senju, but Tobirama tries to assure them "I don't really care about details. Tell me about how it makes you feel." (he looks for the signs of Zetsu corruption)

So basically Tobirama marries Madara to become his therapist. Madara is very much in love and constantly brags how much his spouse loves him and that he always listens his worries.

Izuna is mad as fuck about all of it btw. He thinks that Tobirama has ulterior motives and hides something. (He's right. ) But Tobirama dutifully plays his part as an attentive spouse and makes plans for bettering Uchiha clan just so that the village won't suffer. He'd probably would prescribe them regular therapy for everyone who awoken Sharingan.

also @fashionredalert write a snippet for this au with madara in the mud! pls check it out!

[eyeless-cunt]

KINKTOBER DAY 12

PROMPT: Monsterfucking

CREEP: Slenderman

Word Count: 3.4k (no comments allowed, shut mouth)

CW: 18+ Sexual Content, Tentacles, Dub-Con, Outside Sex, Creampie (SHUT MOUTH), Slender is 10x monsterified, I'm talking we're straight up 8 pages in this motherfucker. Biblically Accurate Slender y'all. Is this technically not creepypasta anymore and actually 8 pages? Or is it both … It's actually something new me tinks. idk. just fuck him bruh.

KINKTOBER '24 MASTERLIST

You were carefully considering the idea that you were finally going mad. There could be no other explanation for you getting yourself into this situation. At any point you could have revisited the plan and thought, “this seems like it could get me killed.” At some point during the planning you could have considered the logistics of getting out alive. But you didn't. Instead, you stood here now in the woods with a dim flashlight and a crumpled paper in hand.

You'd been finding them stuck to trees, and 4 pages later you were starting to finally reconsider your venture. You stared down at the paper that was dirty with a sort of grime mixed with…something. You weren't entirely convinced the something wasn't blood, but it was too dark to tell for sure. As was expected by now, it was filled with charcoal drawings of various symbols and eerie warnings.

‘IT’S ALWAYS WATCHING’

“Right…,” you muttered under your breath, the idea of walking back to the car not seeming too horrible now. You hoped that whatever they believed was watching wasn't too hungry.

You rubbed at your forehead, cursing the headache that had slowly begun when you entered the forest and only gotten worse since then. It felt like static beneath your skin, a sort of numbness that had you pulling your phone out to check the time. A dark screen is the only thing that greeted you.

“Fuck, seriously?” You tsked, unsure of how the battery drained that quickly. Last you checked you had over half the battery left, so how…? A sharp crack coming from straight ahead through the trees has your head snapping up, the phone battery question phasing away to leave room for new ones.

You eye the four pages in your hand, shrugging as you begin to slowly turn around, cautiously beginning your trek back to the car. If you found some more on the way, great. If not, oh well. You'd come back another day–key word being day. Another crack, although farther away sounding, had you picking up the pace slightly. A brisk walk wasn't feeling amazing in this cold weather, but it was better than waiting around to get eaten by a bear.

The static in your head grew the further you walked, and at one point you wondered if you were walking in the correct direction. You shook the thought away, palm pressed to your forehand. How hard could walking in a straight line end up being?

The snap of a branch only a few feet away had you jumping in place, eyes wide as you stared into the dark expanse of wood before you. You pushed yourself to keep moving despite your aggravation and anxiety rising. A shrill ringing sound had begun to persist in your ears, drowning out any small sounds you should normally be able to hear.

The smell of fog had you looking around, noticing the extra chill in the air as you slow down, your thighs burning with an effort you shouldn't have had to make on the journey back. You know for sure now that you must have gotten turned around at some point. You'd been walking for what seemed like hours, but these woods shouldn't be that large. They were hardly two miles wide, and yet you hadn't found a single edge. Your head was pounding unbearably at this point, and you were permanently rubbing at your forehead in a failing attempt to calm the ache.

In the distance, a white paper rustling in the wind caught your attention. “Shit,” you whispered lowly, slowly creeping towards the paper. Despite your further time in the woods you hadn't found anymore. Yet here laid a fifth, just as filthy as the others and stuck to a tree trunk.

‘DON'T LOOK OR IT TAKES YOU’

Another warning against whatever ‘It’ was. You felt a shiver run its way down your spine, the fog from earlier persisting. You eye your surroundings, wondering if maybe you should just start screaming and hope someone comes to your rescue. One look at how the moon is still high in the sky makes you trash the idea immediately.

You fold the paper with the others in your back pocket, walking over to a stump to sit and breathe some focus back into your body. An animal's scream in the distance has you standing right back up, grabbing your dim flashlight and steadily jogging away. You switch direction for a change and head in the opposite direction of the scream–east, hoping to end whatever circle loop you were stuck in.

After only five minutes of walking you encounter another page, your headache still steadily increasing in pressure. The sound of static was ringing in your ears as you grabbed the sixth paper, eyeing it carefully.

‘NO NO NO NO NO NO–’

Your hands shake a bit as you read the page that's covered in the single word, every single ‘no’ basically ripped into the paper with the pencil tip. Whoever hung these was seriously messed up. You'd read online that people found these, but maybe your curiosity should've stayed unsated.

Flickering light sends your gaze down, immediate panicked curses spewing from your mouth as you hit the flashlight repeatedly, to no avail. It dies out anyways, leaving you stranded in the dark and alone. Despite feeling like crying, you hold it in, looking around and letting your eyes adjust to the darkness. Now focused on the space between the trees, your eyes focus on something tall in the distance. Your eyes furrow as you try to make sense of whatever it is, horror seeping into your bones as you realize it's a suit–which makes it a person. A person? No, you think, it's much too tall to be a person. The ringing in your ears reaches a crescendo as you watch it's ‘head’ turn as it watches you.

As it…watches you. Sudden realization and fear pools in your gut as you remember the long stick figure that was drawn on all the pages without fail. You thought nothing of it at the time, the doodle not even worth mentioning. Yet here it was, staring back at you with a white blank face and unusually long limbs. ‘Its always watching,’ plays in the back of your mind as your eyes tear up in horror. You're sprinting through the forest now, pure adrenaline and fear coursing through your veins and pushing you faster as you tear through branches and various bushes in your way. You hear it now, the static. It's not your headache, it's that thing.

The static grows louder as you run, and you feel the hopelessness and fear settle into your bones, knowing that means it's growing closer. A searing pain in your side has you screaming as you look down, realizing you've been slammed against a tree. You scoff as you look up and realize there's a paper stuck to this very tree. With your head pounding and screaming, you reach up and grab the seventh note. Useless, maybe.

‘CAN’T RUN’

Oh, you don't say? You gasp as you feel yourself being lifted, the burning in your side still nothing compared to the ache that's slamming against your skull walls by now. You open your eyes, trembling as you realize you're at least ten feet in the air now. A scream escapes you as you see that you're eye level with the faceless being. ‘Don’t look or it takes you,’ surfaces in your memory, prompting you to close your eyes. You open them again anyways, the fear forcing them open. You can't look away, noting how the suit the creature wears is still clean, somehow. Much cleaner than your now dirt stained clothing.

You struggle in its grasp, unsure of how you're being held as you eye its hands that stay straight at its side. A slick tendril of sorts shoots forward to hold you by the waist, halting your squirming. That's how then.

“Wha–wait, wait!” Your voice trembles as it leaves your body, panic overtaking you as you feel the tendrils that surround you begin to move. They slide up your body to snatch your hands, holding them together above you. You feel the strain on your shoulders as your body swings, sending you into hysterics. Your eyes widen in fright as its hand moves finally.

You shriek as you see it move towards you, legs kicking as it uses its hand to grab the top half of your face, blocking part of your vision. Your kicking is halted as more tendrils return to hold them in place, a shiver wracking through you as one slides its way to your waist.

“You must wish to die, human.” The sound of its voice in your head with you has you halting for a second, confused yet transfixed.

“No answer? Do you not know this tongue, after all?” You try to move, your headache easing as he speaks. Were you supposed to respond?

“Let me go,” is all you manage to get out, fear seizing your body before you could continue. Not that you were sure of what else could possibly be said.

You wait for a response, but what seems like minutes pass with you still hanging in the air limply, eyes attempting to peek behind its hand as you focus on where its eyes should be. Still, you can't gather the courage to speak again. You look up to find that the moon hasn't moved an inch. That shouldn't be possible.

“Where are we?” The question sounds weak coming from your lips, and it hangs in the air without an answer for an indefinite amount of time. Eventually, it removes its hand from your skull, the limb returning to its side.

“According to your brain, nowhere you know of, human.” Confused, you mull over its response in your head, realization washing over you like a bucket of cold water. It grabbed you for that reason, then? How much did it learn?

“Only that you're much stupider than I previously thought.” You gasp, the knowledge that it could read your mind only making you that much more fearful. The tendril on your waist tightens, causing you to whine in pain as you feel your side burn as though you're on fire. With your headache almost gone you're left to focus on that. That, and the fact that you're about ten seconds from death.

“You didn't come here to die?” It asks the question as though it doesn't know the answer. You can't even be bothered to say “obviously”, eyes searching the darkness around you as though help would be here soon.

“Why risk your life?” It continues as though it doesn't hear you cursing its existence in your head. You don't have an answer.

“Predestined, maybe.” You scoff. Well that's fucking stupid, you think. Everyone is ‘predestined’ to die, you don't have to be so goddamn pretentious about it. Your squirming only seems to bind you tighter, and eventually you have no choice but to give up and lie there, tired and limp, feeling hopeless.

“Predestined for other things, maybe.” Other things? Strangulation? Death by being eaten alive, 'maybe'? Death by fire, if this thing got creative.

A tendril moving up around your inner thigh to hold you has you flinching, warmth flooding your face as you shiver. Your face burns in embarrassment, wondering if maybe there was a possibility he missed your reaction to it. Or maybe his species doesn't have sex, or understand it for that matter. The remembrance that it can read your mind has you snapping your head down at the ground, mind racing to think about anything else. Instead of rushing to think about any number of important things like your wounds, your situation, or your inevitable and closely looming death–you instead just chant the first thing you lock eyes onto, ‘rock’ being the chant in your head. He speaks again, interrupting your steady stream of chanting.

“I’m a ‘he’ now? No longer an ‘it’. How nice.” He seems sarcastic, as though the fact that he was ever an ‘it’ to you offended him. “Chanting never does much for subconscious thoughts.” You tense, the embarrassment that was haunting you earlier coming back full force like a typhoon. You begin to chant, ‘shut up,” hoping it'll do the trick this time. His expressionless face seems unamused.

“I don't understand your shame. Are you not more worried about your death by my hands than my judgement?” You look away, realizing the absurdity of your worries, but unable to quell them all the same. Was he judging you? Or was he too worried about killing you? Neither were options you'd like to explore. A tendril slipping past your waistband has you gasping, the feeling causing your thighs to clench. He had to have done that on purpose.

“And if I did? What action would you take besides squirming in my grasp?” You balk, wondering what exactly he meant by that. Surely the attitude wasn't a species based attribute.

“Is rubbing your thighs together for a mate at any time an attribute of yours?” Your mouth drops almost comically, your eyes glaring daggers at him as you begin attempts to kick your way from his grip again. You scoff, the thought of trying to seduce a faceless, tactless, and murderous creature almost sending you into hysterics.

“And yet your body is readying itself for me all the same.” Gasping, you manage to flip him off, the tendrils wrapped around your wrist tightening as a result.

“You believe I'm a liar?” He questions, head doing the smallest tilt as his blank face stares at you. For once, you speak out loud.

“I believe you're a dick!” You shout, your attempt at kicking only serving to tire you out.

“But a liar all the same.” You scoff, wondering if he ever got tired of cryptic speech.

A tendril yanking off your shoe has you squirming yet again, watching in shock and confusion as your pants get yanked down over your hips. Your mouth opens to speak, only to clamp down on an unsavory noise that almost escapes by a pinch. You look down, finding a tendril slipped past your underwear, toying with your clit and sliding between your folds. You can't even attempt to open your mouth, legs squirming as you bite your tongue, trying your hardest to ignore the sudden but intense pleasure ricocheting through your body.

“Do you still find me to be a liar?” You can't possibly speak, the feeling he's putting you through far too much on your already overstressed mind. Your legs are forced open, and upon looking again you find yourself completely bare, but you're unsure of when that happened, your brain foggy.

‘I 'find you' to be a dick,’ you think clearly, hoping he caught it among all the thoughts that were going haywire through your head.

“And yourself the liar?” You don't bother to think up a response, only shooting a glare his way as you feel the cool air breeze past your skin, sending shivers through you.

You yelp as you feel him prodding at your entrance, wondering if he'll really take it that far. There can't be anything in it for him, can there? Was there any point in prolonging your death?

“Your mind is filled with worry. Is that an attribute of your species as well?” You scoff, deciding that attitude must certainly be hereditary for his kind. There could be no other possible way he held so much, it was practically unnatural. That, and the entirety of his existence.

Suddenly a mewl is slipping from your mouth, legs spread as you realize he's finally slipped inside you. You heat in embarrassment as you clamp your mouth shut again, trying not to roll your hips as he slides in and out of you easily. You're clenching around him, your insides practically trying to suck him back inside as he pulls out.

Despite your resistance, you find yourself letting your head fall back as another tendril joins to rub at your clit, the pleasure becoming too intense to bear stoically. You bite your lip as an orgasm builds in your core, too addicted to the way he's making you feel to beat it down.

Him pushing inside you again pushes it over the edge, the orgasm rolling through you in waves, your insides clenching onto him as it does. You can't help but whimper, the feeling pushing through you with little warning. You're breathing harshly, short pants leaving you as you hang limp and wet before him.

Movement has you turning to look downwards, only to find his hand has reached out to touch you as well. Your hips buck unwillingly as he slips a finger inside, swiping at the wetness he's left behind.

“Still, you ache?” He questions almost mockingly, and you close your eyes, shame coursing through your veins. As if that was your fault.

“Not a fault. Only an attribute.” His fingers return, pumping in and out of you steadily, your hips rolling into him for more despite your inner protests. Your mouth falls open as he hits a sweet spot, gasps and moans spilling from you now unabated. The feeling of him pulling out has you whining pitifully.

His tendrils slipping from your body catches your attention just before you begin free falling, mouth opening to squeal right as he catches you in his arms. You don't have time to question him, a burn at your entrance forcing your mouth shut as you feel what's probably him and not a tendril enter you slowly. You throw your arms around him, burying your head in the crook of his neck as the intense ache of him entering sends shocks through your body one after the other. His skin feels smooth, similar to yours. It's comforting in a way, but that thought is immediately squashed as you remember his ability.

The idea that he heard you think that despite the fact that you'll be dead by his hands immediately after this sends a feeling down your spine that's much more than merely embarrassment. Meanwhile he pushes the whole way in, the ache subsiding almost immediately as you feel him flush with all your walls. You can't help but moan at the feeling.

You hold him tighter as he rolls into you, shaking the thought away as you chase the pleasure he's giving you. It's not worth worrying about if you'll be dead soon. The only thing you have the capacity to worry about at this moment is cumming around his length.

Instead of his words in your mind you feel him in an entirely different way. It's as though he's conveying emotions to you rather than words–the main one being his pleasure at your submission. It's an odd feeling to have someone else's emotions flowing through your body, but not entirely unwelcome. It makes you wonder if he can feel yours.

Your nails are digging into his shoulders as he presses into you, your legs clenching around him tightly. You feel his hand holding the back of your head, and you think it may be a bit unnecessary to hold you, your arms and legs doing enough of the work to keep you up here with him. A deep thrust of his hips has you seeing stars, any and all previous thoughts you had melting away as the only thing that remained was pleasure. Your legs begin to feel weak as he ruts into you deeply.

“Your mind is entirely more tolerable like this.” You barely hear him, entirely focused on the budding orgasm that's somehow already hitting you, your body tensing as you chase it, the feeling of being filled so much more intense than it was only a minute ago. You understand why as he pulls out of you, a liquid something dripping out onto your thighs and the forest floor below you. You can't bother to think of what may happen next, the emptiness of your body causing you to clench around nothing, as though you still weren't satiated.

“Your attribute is far more persistent than mine, human.” He says it as though it will make any sense to you in this state, your mind still really only focused on the aftershocks of your orgasm. You can barely remember how you found yourself on the ground, the gate to the parking lot in sight. You look down to find yourself not only clothed but dry and clean. Your head whips to the treeline surrounding you, eyeing the shadows carefully as you feel he must still be watching–and yet, nothing hides there, leaving you much emptier than you ever thought possible.

[thechaoticdruid]

°•IF THE BG3 COMPANIONS BABYSAT YOUR KIDS!•°

Lae'zel

Congratulations your children are spending an afternoon at boot camp!

You can rest assured they will be treated fairly at least.

No favoritism going on here.

Anyone who misbehaves shall be sent to solidarity confinement and left there until....Idk

If they want a snack they WILL have to fight one another in a duel to the death.

Or at least until one of them falls down and cries.

To the winner go the cookies.

Or more accurately maybe some giant space hamster jerky.

Karlach

This is assuming her engine has been fixed, naturally.

The kids absolutely love Auntie K.

Legit can carry them all on her shoulders at once.

She gives the best hugs too and is always so nice and warm.

She is up to play any games with them! Especially ones where she pretends to be a monster and chases them around.

Very protective of the little ones.

Brings them new stuffies each time she visits.

You MUST remind her constantly to watch her language around the little ones!

Gale

Arrives via magic portal.

Brings Tara to help him.

Takes it very personally if one of the children don't like him.

Tries to impress them via magic and creates a magical illusion to entertain the kiddos.

Attempts to teach them everything he knows about the weave.

Takes it very hard if the children fall asleep during his lecture.

Must be consoled by Tara.

If any take an interest in the weave they immediately become his favorite.

You'll probably end up coming home to your home appliances floating or having some kind of enchantment on them.

Halsin

Yes he turns into a bear and lets them ride on his back.

Most time is spent outside enjoying nature and all of its beauty.

Will carry the littlest one on his shoulders at all times.

Always brings healthy snacks, mostly fruit like apple slices.

Proceeds to take them to a nearby pond to feed the ducks.

Widdles them little animal figures to play with.

No TV or video games. The thought of technology taking over their lives makes him sick.

We play outside or we don't play at all.

Doesn't mind them grabbing at his ears, if they can even reach them that is!

He has to remind one of them multiple times that he unfortunately cannot turn into a dragon.

Sad sad truth.

Shadowheart

Makes cute little flower crowns with them.

Helps the little ones feel better if any of them are afraid of the dark.

Is very good at comforting them.

Possibly might be one of the older one's first goth girl crush.

Badmouths Lae'zel in front of them shamelessly.

Always puts on a tim Burton movie or something for them to watch.

Definitely the reason for any of their emo phases.

They think she's really cool though.

Wyll

Always the first to volunteer to babysit.

Man has the patience of a saint and can handle even the most unruly of children.

Always talks them up and is very careful to never put them down.

Tells them all kinds of exciting stories of his time as the Blade.

Makes sure to adjust them to be suitable for the kiddos.

Leaves out the scary parts.

If any of them are mean to one another and can't get along he's the type to make them each say something nice about the other as a punishment.

Let's them play with toy swords and teaches them a thing or two about using them.

Never raises his voice at them. Is super calm and collected.

Loves them all to pieces!

Also may or may not take them out to get ice cream if they're good.

Astarion

Assuming this is Spawnstarion we're talking about because the vampire Ascendant would just laugh in your face if you asked him then slam the door on you.

Our sweet little spawn will also likely laugh and think you're joking at first.

"You seriously want a vampire to watch over your children?"

Assuming you pay him and be sure to give him big sweet puppy dog eyes he may consider it.

This man is a very not my child not my problem kind of guy.

Gets annoyed with all the children asking tedious vampire questions and responds with very sarcastic answers.

Does not approve of them wanting to touch his ears.

Agrees to let them see his fangs in hopes to scare them (the mischievous little shit).

The children instead think they're cool, which confuses him. He really isn't sure how to feel about it.

Threatens to eat them if they get on his nerves.

Spends most of the time on the sofa, boredly reading a magazine or watching television.

Miraculously takes a shine to one of the younger girls who call him pretty and compliments his clothes and hair.

This is also given the girl is a little mischief gremlin who pulls pranks on her older siblings.

He lets her paint his nails purple or red while she gossips about her mother/father's new partner or her siblings.

Unapologetically shows her favoritism and lets her sit on his lap and watch TV with him.

Will not bat an eye if the other children run a muck and destroy shit.

Legit just keeps watching TV. Probably some drama filled 'reality' show.

He actually finds the chaos caused by the children quite amusing.

One of the children somehow ends up on the roof.

Once the parents are home and it's time to leave. The youngest girl gives him a hug.

His eyes get all big and round and almost threaten to tear up.

Astarion is not asked to babysit again.

Sorry some of them are so short, I mostly write for Astarion so I'm not very confident at doing the other characters.

Hope you like it though!

[eatingfireflies]

2.2 is coming and if I don't write this now, how can I get jossed later?

This is the moment when I started to wonder if their 2.0 conversation was a role play.

Like, we know this issue is a sore point for Ratio. The fact that this guy he called a loud peacock in 2.0 made a joke about his failure to get into the Genius Society and all he said was 'I was being sarcastic'?? Babe, is something wrong? You barely touched your sharp and witty comeback.

(Btw I checked both Cn and Jp, he says 'It was just a joke.')

And I don't want to bring up the voice acting because the way voices sound is subjective and what I hear might not be what you hear, but the Double Indemnity scenes with Ratio are probably the most relaxed we ever see Aventurine ever. (I'm talking about the Cn version, but I played in Jp audio and I could hear it there too.) He's playful and his voice is higher pitched, so different from what we've seen of him so far.

It sounds like Ratio and Aventurine have known each other longer than they want us to believe in their 2.0 convo.

I mean, the implication here is Ratio did some research on Aventurine's background recently and that's how he found out about Aventurine's past. So we make the assumption that they haven't been working together for long.

Look, they even did a Penacony remix of their Final Victor conversation

But honestly, you'd think Ratio would have figured out if he trusted Aventurine or not at this point, considering he came back for more after Final Victor (lmao??)

Also, we know Aventurine had been planning for Penacony since his call to Topaz, where he asked for her help. It's hard to believe that he went through all the trouble of asking two different Stonehearts to lend him their cornerstones and then went to Penacony and the Dreamscape with Ratio, whom he barely knows. That's too much gambling, Aventurine!

We know the Family won't let anyone from the IPC to enter the Dreamscape and Aventurine only gets a pass because of the Watchmaker's invite

But Himeko is wrong here: Aventurine didn't go inside the Dreamscape alone and he does have someone backing him up. It just happened that almost no one else saw Ratio in Penacony and the one scene where we did see him talking to Aventurine was 2.0, where he got angry and left Aventurine babbling to himself.

But now that we're here, what did Ratio do in Penacony aside from bicker and betray?

His initial job is to gather intel, afaik. Aventurine tells him to go look into things in 2.0 before he left. And he does give Aventurine updates in 2.1 (Aventurine finds out about Firefly from Ratio) so good for you, professor!

Ratio is Aventurine's connection to his colleagues outside. Once Aventurine's plans enter the Dead phase, Ratio is the only one left to tell Topaz and Jade if the plan had been a success or not. (Aventurine also makes a joke about the Genius from the Council of the Mundanites offering to be his undertaker. In the Jp version, he says 'So the Genius from the Council of the Mundanites wants to claim my corpse? What an honour.' So there's also that... Uh. Idk how dead dead Aventurine really is, but at least we know someone's looking after his body while he's gone lmao??)

But also he's Aventurine's bait to Sunday, the (fake) weak link in Aventurine's plans that Sunday thought he could exploit.

And the 3rd one is a bit complicated, because it is a gamble. Remember Aventurine's E1? Prisoner's Dilemma? Yeah, it's kinda like that. I talked about it before, but let's copy paste it here for easier reading (and because this post totally needs to be a wall of text)

Let's zoom out a bit again and remember that Aventurine was sent to Penacony because Diamond thinks this whole affair could still have a peaceful resolution. Meaning: Aventurine is the kind option. The IPC could have sent Opal instead, but it sounds like that means there would be a body count.

And I think that's why Ratio is here and why he agreed to cooperate. Because if Aventurine's plan works out, only Aventurine's life will ever be in real danger. (And we know from Ratio's note that he also took steps to increase the chances of Aventurine coming back.)

Ratio being there is important to the plan because

Him being from the Intelligentsia Guild removes some of the heat from the Family. If Ratio is coming in as a plus one, the IPC (in this case, I'm assuming it's Aventurine because he's the guy in charge of the operation) chose the best person for the job. It makes the Family happier knowing there are not two IPC envoys walking around the Dreamscape and Aventurine has a buddy who can move around more freely than another IPC employee could

But because Ratio is an outsider, he's also the weak link in Aventurine's plans. Another IPC employee will probably not betray Aventurine, but the Guild has no particular horse in this race. We were also led to believe from their 2.0 conversation that Ratio doesn't like Aventurine very much. This is what I meant when I said Ratio is a bait: Aventurine was pretty much dangling him in front of Sunday, making Sunday think he could use Ratio to ruin Aventurine's plans. The important thing of course is the trust the two of them have for each other (yay, Prisoner's Dilemma). Ratio could ruin Aventurine's plan if he wants to (very bad for all involved because I'm guessing Opal is the next step) and Aventurine could fail (not as bad for everyone involved after 2.1 because the IPC has already won regardless. There's still a Phase 2 in Aventurine's plan and Ratio seems to want him back after that, so I guess he'd consider it a failure if Aventurine doesn't return?), but trusting each other means they win.

Tl;dr Ratio's presence in Penacony is a bit of a gamble on Aventurine's part but it worked well for him so far. Ratio is here to make sure everyone stays alive. (And maybe the Phase Flame? I honestly don't know if the Annihilation Gang will ever come back again, but for now I'm going with the obvious and assuming Ratio is here because he thinks Aventurine's plan will work and work with the least amount of pain for everyone.)

Thank you for getting this far. Why do we think they deserve Oscars?

Aside from the movie references (we'll get to that), we have 3 different instances where Aventurine mentions acting / the 'script'.

The most direct is the conversation with future!Aventurine in the garden maze: future!Aventurine praises Ratio's acting while Aventurine says 'Or he might not be acting at all' (the inability of these two to admit they are friends, but more importantly they don't think the other person thinks highly of them, is2g).

The next one is hidden in the mission description

And the other one got lost in translation. This was translated to 'You catch on quickly' in En. In Jp he says something like 'You have a good sense for drama, professor' (Sorry Idk what this is in the og Cn)

Finally, Double Indemnity. I haven't seen the movie, but it seems to be about an insurance salesman who gets seduced by a hot wife femme fatale into helping her get rid of her husband so she could claim his insurance. Double Indemnity refers to this clause where the insurance gets doubled if the person suddenly dies of an accident.

I've thought about this so hard, let me tell you. What could this possibly have to do with Aventurine and the mission? (For example, 'Hot wife Sunday seduces Ratio the insurance salesman into helping him get rid of Aventurine' etc.) And I honestly still don't know but one detail does help my theory so I'm pulling it out:

The relationship between the insurance salesman and the hot wife femme fatale was known only to the two of them. To the insurance claims adjuster, who was investigating the case and trying to prove the husband's death wasn't an accident, those two are unrelated people who might have seen each other once or twice. The claims adjuster suspected the wife, but had no idea of the insurance salesman's involvement. The truth is, they actually knew each other a full year before the plan was set in motion. Hey, doesn't it actually fit nicely now?

(Spellbound otoh, I still don't know. I have a Sunday and Gallagher reading of it, but Hvy keeps telling me no and making it gay instead so Idk.)

[marxism-transgenderism]

Genuinely would love to know what you think that trans women have in common with femboys

Well for starters we have the shared desire to take estrogen to alter out bodies and, short of that, dress and act more femininely/as woman/however you wanna phrase it. In a time of "anti-drag" bills and restrictions on access to hormones i hope i don't have to point out how these shared desires back us all into the same corner.

Look a lot of people replying to my post have assumed I'm defending a lot of wild shit i never mentioned in the post. Idk which twitter femboys pissed y'all off so much but I never said we have to court any particular group, especially not some creeps online who harass us.

But I'm deeply deeply worried by this growing sentiment among transfems on here that anyone else doing transfemininity different from us are just a grifters or aping our identities. Not only because we should respect others but girl how many of us went through a phase of being feminine boys before realizing we were trans women. Hell, i know so many girls on here who identify as both trans women and feminine men.

I'm not saying we are all exactly 100% the same. As i said in the post we have differences in identity and what we like to be called and that does shape our communities. But when that's the only substantial difference that any of us can come up with then i can promise you that the world at large does not care. They want to strip all of us of our rights and healthcare all the same.

What we have in common is that we exist on the same spectrum of transfeminine gender, far closer to each other than some would like to believe. And so when i see a website full of girls who seem more focused on how annoying the people next to us are than how we're all in immediate danger then forgive me for thinking we need to course correct.

Especially when i see so many of us defaulting to the same rhetoric of "they're terrible fetishists engaging in immoral behavior" that the christian right uses against us. You can think sissy kinks are weird and creepy but how are these arguments any different from the blair whites of the world raging against anyone who's not a Medically Diagnosed Dysphoric True Transexual. Cause so far the only substantial thing i can make of the arguments against me is "they're not using the right pronouns that allow them to say femboy" which is just saying they're doing transfemininity wrong and therefore they're bad.

This is getting to be longer than i wanted lol but I want reiterate that we don't need to ally with anyone who doesn't wanna ally with us. Whatever racist transphobic femboy twinks on twitter and 4chan y'all keep talking about are not who I'm talking about. What I'm wanting to point out is that there are people on here who are already in our communities. People who call themselves boys and girls and both and everything else in between who's transitions and identities are not that different from yours or mine. And right now this insistence that they are doing it wrong and are therefore our political enemies is driving and wedge where there doesn't need to be one. I promise we can all just make out and have puffy nipples together

[bluerosefox]

Misunderstandings and Miscommunications

Back at it again with some

✨️ Shenanigans ✨️

Brain rot.

Here goes.

So Danny finally tells his parents the truth (Phantom Planet not happening in this AU) and due to his anxiety and fear takes their disbelief and horror and yelling (not mad or angry but like worried yelling) as rejecting him.

They had rejected Vlad a few weeks ago when he had been caught as Plasmius but they only rejected him because they had found out he had been trying to kill Jack in order to get to Maddie and had been hurting Danny behind their backs while also trying to get him to denounce Jack as his dad, it had nothing to do with him being part ghost.

They do love Danny and are just horrified their invention had killed their baby boy and that they had been trying to hurt him for a last few years because they didn't know he was Phantom (but the clues, oh the clues were staring at them in the face now, how blind they were to it oh.)

Due to Danny's panic he runs off into the Infinite Realms in order to hide with one of his ghost friends but.... he runs into some trouble (Skulker? Walker? idk pick any) and gets tossed in a random portal that had opened up.

And finds himself in the DC verse.

Danny accidentally falls into a huge battle as well and when he spots the heroes trying to protect the city he fell into from some huge evil villain he helps out despite his own emotions (it helps distract him from what he 'thinks' happened between him and his parents)

And once he's done helping he books it cause he need to process everything and doesn't stop when the hero he helped out called out to him, and phases out and turns invisible if the hero tries to stop him to talk. It isn't long until Danny is in a new city and finds some more people to help from villains and evil, and he starts using it to distract himself.

Basically Danny aimlessly wanders around and starts helping anyone to keep his mind off the thought of never being able to go home again.

Meanwhile his parents are PANICKING about not being to find Danny after he runs. They try calling his friends, but the moment they hear the Fenton's say they know about him being Phantom they too jump the gun and think Danny was rejected. They both yell, not letting the Fenton's say anything, and let slip Danny most likely is hiding in the Infinite Realms (aka the Zone) if hes not in Amity.

Tucker and Sam immediately hang up and call Jazz, whose at college, before the Fenton parents could and tell her what happened. And Jazz isn't happy.

Despite being so smart and willing to give their parents so many chances to change their views on Ghosts, she's not a child anymore and isn't going to let them hurt Danny (they don't want to). She starts making her way home to give her parents a piece of her mind.

But by the time she gets there, driving all night, her parents are missing and she finds a video message on the computer from Tucker explaining they had snuck into the house to go into the portal to try to find Danny only to see the Fenton parents suiting up and going into the zone with the Specter Speeder and Boo-o-rang keyed to Danny. "No doubt they're going to hunt Danny down, we're going to try to slow them down and find Danny before they do Jazz! We left an extra Boo-o-rang behind keyed on Danny's signature come help us when you get this message! Take Danny's Specter Bike I made sure the keylock is off!" (Let's pretend Tucker tinkered with the design of the Specter Speeder and made some bike versions, with Danny and funnily enough Johnny 13's help, it was fun bonding thing they all did)

Jazz is even more livid after that. Takes a few things and heads to the portal as well, hopefully to find Danny first before her parents.

By the time Jazz finds the portal that opens to the DC verse she's in Gotham, runs into Red Hood (and helps take down some gang goons but in the process her Boo-o-rang gets busted in the scuffle) and basically they talk. She asks if he's seen any runaway blue eyed black haired young teens around and Jason jokingly says "Nope but we better find him before the Big Bad Bat takes him and turns him into a Robin."

Jazz is very confused.

MEANWHILE

The Fenton parents are of course making a menace of themselves... They're driving around (which is a warning enough if Jack is behind the wheel) trying to find Danny to explain that they do love him and to come back home, and when they do find Danny he freaks out and starts booking it again (right as he actually stopped to talk enough with a hero too). The heroes of the DC verse whose meet Danny and those that heard about some young 'meta' teen whose been helping out and is very powerful, take note how scared and panicked he looked when facing the two and things get worse when they take note how... careless they are going after him (cause we know the Fenton's get a little extreme) and add the fact they look like mad scientists too (they haven't been sleeping well since Danny ran off)

So the DC heroes start assuming the worse for the young teen hero...

It gets even much WORSE when Tucker and Sam, who are hot on the Fenton's heels as well, show up and eventfully tell them what happened (or what they think happened) when they gain their trust.

Basically, a lot of miscommunication happens.

Danny thinks he needs to be on the run from his parents and is helping out in the DC verse to keep his mind off his own breaking heart from the rejection (if you wanna make it serious maybe have his actual core in danger from the rejection or something). And is nearly adopted by every hero who see's this sad ghost kid.

His parents are labeled mad scientists (kinda are) who are hunting Phantom down to end him or experiment on him but they actually DO love him and just want their son come back home. (due to being Fenton's they do kinda accidentally cause a lot of mayhem in their wake)

Tucker and Sam are trying to be amazing friends and stopping the Fenton's from hurting their best friend but much like Danny they are a bit too caught up in their emotions to realize the truth of what happened and may or may not alerted the JL and JLD why Danny is on the run in the first place. (when they had down time to find out where they were they found out about the meta protection laws and is kinda using that to get Danny help)

Jazz is in Gotham, has no way to track Danny down at the moment, is talking with Red Hood (coughAngerManagementcough) about finding her brother and saving him from her parents before they do anything to hurt him. Cue Red Hood (and maybe with the help of the Outlaws) helping Jazz go find her brother.

This can be serious but I mostly see it being silly with nothing but shenanigans and a lot of miscommunication.

[ssa-atlas-alvez]

okay but cowboy!reader taking jj horseback riding when they visit his parents town for a case. they don't come back to his parents house (where they're all staying- readers mom wouldn't take no for an answer) until the early morning and the team teases them about it the next morning over homemade breakfast. reader is all blushey about it because he just genuinely lost track of time showing jj around and jj just isn't phased by the teasing. buddy distracting everyone from the conversation by finally getting fed bacon.

- 🦦

PART ONE (this can be read alone, but it starts the day after part one)

Description: Being close to home, the team finally get to meet reader's family. Things start out great and then... Not so much. Reader makes sure his younger brother knows that despite what their parents have said, he's still there for them.

Warning: homophobia, someone nearly says the f-slur twice (they don't say the whole thing, reader puts them in their place), mentions of going to conversion therapy, pro-conversion therapy views, being kicked out because of sexuality, unaccepting parents, unaccepting sibling (Jason's a bit of a dick and I stand by that). I think that's everything.

A/N: Sorry if this seems rushed at all aha (it's like 3k words but idk worried it's rushed). Also just to clarify I'm against conversion therapy (i'm saying it as a just in case it needs to be said).

Taglist: @xweirdo101x @xdark-acadamiax @ara-a-bird @heidss @chubbyboyinflannel @pendragon-writes @migwayne @bigolgay @technikerin23 @supercriminalbean @honestlycasualarcade @caffeine-mess @1s3v3n1 @oddmiles @kevyeen @stealing-kneecaps @criminalskies @woodandwaxwings @wizardmon3 @aphroditeslovr @ducks118 @azeal-peal @13thdoctor-run @introvertpan84 @goth-boi-atlas

You all met in the lobby at nine the next morning, you winced, seeing the appearance of the rest of the team, “Y’all okay?”

“No,” They groaned simultaneously. 

“Alright, well, breakfast is on me,” You chuckled, “And I’ll drive so you can all sleep on the way there,” You held back a laugh as they all relaxed in relief (well, minus Rossi and Hotch who always made sure to be relatively simple with their drinking). 

It wasn't a long drive, two hours max, before you arrived home. When you got out of the car, you drew in a deep breath, childhood memories rushing in. You had missed his place. You tried to get back as much as you could, for holidays and birthdays, but it never felt enough.

“Hi Mama!” You cheered, walking towards her with a grin.  

“(Y/N)! What are you doing with your shoes on?” She raised her eyebrows, putting her hands on her hips. “Boy you know you need to take them off when you get in!” Alice, your Mama, looked up, seeing the panicked look of the team, she continued, “Oh, y'all don't need to worry your pretty little faces about it, (Y/N) should have remembered.” 

“Sorry Mama,” You responded, quickly taking your shoes off and removing your hat and giving her a kiss on the cheek, “How are y’all?”

“We're all okay, son,” A gruff voice sounded through the room.

“Pops!” You grinned, giving your father a handshake before a hug. “Where's the squirt?” You asked, looking around.

“I'm not that much smaller than you,” Aden rolled his eyes, you didn’t respond, simply pulling your younger brother into an embrace.

“I didn’t realise he was such a hugger,” Emily smirked slightly as she spoke to your mother.

“Oh, (Y/N)’s always been a hugger,” Alice says, “He’s a complete softy.”

“We could never have known.” Morgan said before continuing, “Especially with all his reckless shoot outs,”

“His what?” Your Pops exclaimed. 

“You're such an ass-” You hissed, turning to Morgan with a glare. 

“Y/N!” Alice exclaimed.

“Sorry Mama! See y'all come over and now I'm in trouble every few minutes,” You said, turning your attention back to the team. 

“Is what this lovely man said true?”

“Yes Mama, but in my defence-”

“Good luck son,” You Pops said, patting your shoulder. “Can I get anyone a drink? I reckon Alice’ll be chewing him out for a least ten minutes,”

Three minutes into the lecture, the door opened and closed loudly. You turned and saw your older brother, Jason, walk in.

“Well I'll be damned, if it isn't my snotty nosed younger brother!” Your head snapped up and your Mama wrapped up her lecture as you walked towards your brother.  

“Jason! How you been?!” You pull him into a tight embrace.

“Not too bad, not too bad.” Jason answered, “Plodding along,”

Your attention switched over to Emily as she cleared her throat, “Oh! Sorry, this is my team. So Hotch, Rossi, Morgan, Garcia, Emily, JJ, and Reid,”

“I think you only had a younger brother?” 

“Oh, er, Jason was Mama and Papa’s first child and then they adopted me and Aden,” You quickly explained.

“I see, don’t mention your least favourite brother, I see how it is,” Jason teased, you rolled your eyes. 

“Whatever,” Jason laughed and gently shoved you. 

“Ladies, y’all can take the spare room,” You said, “Gents, y’all can take my room. Aden, you lucky thing, get me sleepin on your floor,” Aden groaned loudly, causing the team to chuckle. 

You had a few hours to settle down and you showed the team around, showing them who’s room was who’s, by the time you were settled, you were being told that it was time for dinner. And soon enough you were all sat around the table. 

"Mrs (L/N), we were wondering if you had any good stories on young y/n here?" Derek asks with a grin.

Your face pales as your Mama smile, "Mama, that's not really necessary-"

“Nonsense! Your team wants to learn more about you,” She gave you a smile, patting your cheek. You found yourself sinking in your chair. “Sit up straight,” 

“Yes Ma’am,” You turned to Morgan, “I’ll get you back for this,” You mumbled, turning to your mashed potatoes. 

“We used to have this horse, Cinnamon,” You Mama started and you found yourself groaning in embarrassment. 

“You don’t even know what story Mama’s going to tell,” Jason pointed out.

“Doesn’t matter, they’re all embarrassing,” You mumbled. 

“He used to sneak out at night to sleep in her stable,” Your Mama began. 

"Which would have been adorable if he wasn't sixteen," Jason snorted, you groaned loudly.

"Can you not embarrass me in front of my colleagues?" 

"You do that yourself," Aden chimed in with a smirk.

“Kid, don’t test me-”

“Whatever, you’re an old man now,” Aden shot back. “Has (Y/N) told you about the time he got escorted out of a rodeo for threatenin’ the judges?”

“Oh god, I forgot about that!” You groaned loudly, placing your head in your hands as your team laughed loudly. 

When night time rolled around, you parted ways with your team. The men heading to one room, the ladies heading to the other. You and Aden made your way to his room. You set up the sleeping bag and laid down. Eventually, Aden hopped into his bed, turning off his lamp and leaving you both in darkness. 

“Which one is the one you have a crush on?” Aden asked you, breaking the silence.

“Hm?”

“The one you message me about,” 

“Oh, JJ,” You said. “The blonde one without glasses,” 

“Oh, she’s pretty.” Aden said, “You should totally ask her out.”

“Not that simple I’m afraid kid,” You sighed, “We work together.”

“No, it is that simple, grown ups just complicate everything for no reason.” You paused, taking in his words. He did have a point, (sort of). 

“I guess.” You shrugged, “I dunno, guess I’m scared of rejection.”

“That would make sense,” Aden shrugged, “Given our past n all,”

“Dr Aden over here,” You joked. 

Aden paused for a moment, shifting so he could look at you, “I think I wanna be a profiler when I’m older,” 

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise, “Really?”

“Yeah,” Aden gave a small smile, “I think I could help do some good.”

“Aw, you wanna be just like you’re big brother,” You teased before sobering up, “I think you’d be good at it,”

“Really?” You smiled as his face lit up.

“Definitely, you got a smart brain in there, kid.”

“Thanks!” Aden laid back down, the pair of you smiling softly to yourselves. Silence took over for a few seconds. “Y/N can I tell you something?” Aden asked into the darkness.

“Sure, kid, what's up?”

There was a small pause, before Aden’s voice laced with anxiety piped up, “Promise it won't make you hate me?”

“Nothing you say would make me hate you, kiddo.” You said strongly. “Ever.”

“I- I like boys, I'm gay.”

You couldn’t help but smile, “Kid, that's okay. You're allowed to like boys, there's nothing wrong with it.” You reassured, Aden breathed a sigh of relief.

“I wanna tell Mama and Pops, could you wait close by in case it goes badly?”  

“Of course, but I'm sure it'll go okay. When did you want to tell them?” 

“Hmm… Two days time? I feel like that gives me some prep time.” 

“Okay kid,” You said, “Now get some sleep,”

“A’right, night, (Y/N),”

“Night Aden,” You said, “Love you kid,”

“You too,” He yawned. 

JJ opening the door and chiming a ‘good morning’ is what woke you at eight am the next morning. Normally, you would have been mad, having been woken up so early. But seeing JJ smile at you seemed to put the world right. 

“Mornin’,” You replied, your voice deep from sleep. “You sleep well?” 

“You betcha cowboy,” She responded with a twinkle in her eyes, you huffed a laugh. “Your mum says breakfast will be ready in ten minutes.”

Both you and Aden sat up at the mention of food. “We’ll be right down.” Aden said. When JJ had left, Aden turned back to you. “Where’s Buddy?”

“Sleeping in Mama and Pops’ room, apparently they’ve missed him more than me,” Aden gave a laugh as he left the room. 

After breakfast, you sat on your couch, staring out the window into your backyard when JJ sat next to you. “You know, when you were talking about your childhood yesterday, I realised something.”

“Yeah?”

“I’ve never ridden a horse before,” 

You bit your lip, forcing yourself to keep a variety of different jokes in your head - reminding yourself that it wasn’t the time or the place. 

“Never?” You asked instead, and she shook her head. 

“Nope, not once.”

“Would you like to? We’ve got horses,” You said, “I’m sure Mama and Pops won’t mind. I could even show you around a bit.”

JJ looked at you before nodding. “Yeah, okay,” She gave you a smile. 

When you both got back it dark, you put both the horses back in the stables, following the usual steps (picking out the hooves and such) before you gave them an apple each and thanked them (something you always did after a ride). With that, you made your way back into the house. 

“Well hey there stud,” Is what greeted you. You stared at Morgan, jaw dropped. “You two kids have been out a while,”

“I showed her around town,” You explained, feeling an awful lot like a teenager who stayed out past curfew. 

“Uh-huh,” Penelope chimed, folding her arm.

“Hey, hey now,” You responded, “I just showed her around town, I showed her where I went to school, things like that.”

“Just ignore them,” JJ replied, giving you a smile, “They clearly don’t have anything better to do.”

“You wound me with your words,” 

“Children, stop arguing,” Your Mama chimed, “Agent Rossi and Agent Hotchner has helped me cook dinner.”

“Rossi and Hotch are gonna be your new dads,” Morgan teased, you grabbed the closest pillow, throwing it at his head. 

And soon enough, you were all sat around the table eating. “I’m just saying,” Aden said, he, Morgan, Prentiss, and Garcia grinning at you, “It’s a bit suspicious that you only took JJ out.”

You opened your mouth to argue when you witnessed Buddy stand on his hind legs and steal some bacon off of Morgan’s plate. 

"Buddy!" Your eyes are wide as Buddy runs off with all of Morgan's bacon. "I am so sorry-!" You explain before running after him. "Buddy I thought we were trying a raw diet?!" 

Buddy barked and your jaw dropped, "Don't take that tone with me, Mister." 

“And on that note, I think we should all call it a night,” Your Pops said with a chuckle. 

A few hours later, you laid back in your sleeping bag in the dark, “I think I’m going to tell them tomorrow.” Aden said thoughtfully, “I want it over with.”

“A’right kid,” You said, “I’ll be there,”

“I know, you’re always there when I need you,” Aden sat up to give you a smile, “Except for that time when you were too busy getting to know Rosie-”

“Hey, you told me you were fine, don’t open that can of worms kid-” Aden cut you off with a fit of laughter and soon enough you joined in. “You damn near gave me a heart attack with that.”

“That’s because you’re an old man.” You gasped dramatically.

“How dare you!” 

“Boys you better go to sleep!” You heard your Mama exclaim through the door and you both struggled to keep your laughter quiet.

It was JJ that woke you that morning as well (something you could quite happily get used to). When she left, once again the pair of you got ready for the day. 

“I think I might tell Mama and Pops before breakfast. I want to get it over with.”

“A’right, kiddo, I’ll be right outside, okay?” You reassured and he nodded. You gathered our clothes, getting dressed in the bathroom whilst Aden got changed in the bedroom. And then the pair of you walked downstairs, you waiting outside the kitchen door in the living room whilst Aden walked inside.

It had only been two minutes when Morgan approached you. “You good?” Morgan asked, seeing you standing in the living room staring intently at the kitchen door. You turned to him and gave a nod.

“Yeah, Aden wanted me close while he tells Mama and Pops something.” You answered, giving Morgan a small smile, “He was a bit nervous,”

The door flew open and closed again, looking at you for a split second before flinging his arms around you as he gave a small sob. “Kid? Kiddo, what's wrong?” You asked, rubbing circles on his back.  

“You were wrong, it wasn't okay.” Aden cried.

“What’d they say?”  

“That it’s wrong and I need conversion therapy.” Aden’s answer was short but made your stomach drop. 

“Aden, look at me. There is nothing wrong with you. What they say don't matter, you hear me? They're bigots.” Your eyes flicked up to JJ, Emily, Penelope, and Spencer as they wandered in, concerned, “Why don't yall go pack some stuff, okay? 'm gonna talk to Mama and Pops, okay?”

You waited until Aden was out of the room before you walked in, “Y’all wanna tell me what the fuck you just said to that kid? He's crying his eyes out.”

“We told him the truth.” Your Mama answered.

“Really and what would that be?” You asked, folding your arms.

“That we don't want the likes of him under this roof.” Your Pops is the one who answered this time. 

“The likes of him?”

“He's a homosexual!” Your Pops exclaimed, his face slowly starting to turn red.

“He's your son.” You stated.

“He's a fa-”

“Don't you even fuckin call him that again, you hear me?” You exclaimed, “I don't care if you're our pops, you call him that again I knock you out, understood?”

“We're your parents,” Your Mama exclaimed, “Where's your respect?”

“Funny enough, Ma, my respect left the minute you told my baby brother that the only way he would be accepted in this household is if he changed himself.”

“How are you defendin’ him?” She asked. 

“There's nothing wrong with being gay.” You scoffed loudly, were they really so blatantly homophobic?

“It's disgustin’!” 

“He's your son-”

“He's a sinner.”

“He’s a fourteen year old boy!” You could feel yourself starting to lose your temper.

“We've told him he can stay if he goes to conversion therapy.” 

“Then he's leavin’. I'll look after him.” You state. 

“You want him? Take him. We don't want a fa-” You don’t realise you’re reacting until you’re swinging. You hear a slight crunch as it hits his nose, you ignore it. You also ignore the pain that flashes through your hand on impact.

“I told you not to fuckin’ talk about my brother like that.” You state, pointing harshly at him. “Don’t fuckin’ talk about him like that.”

“(Y/N), You need to step out of the room,” You didn’t even realise Derek was in the room, until his fingers are wrapping around your shoulders in an attempt to pull you out of the room. You quickly shrug his arm off you.

“Y’all don't deserve a kid like Aden,” You leave the room, wanting nothing more than to go back in there and talk some sense into them. Instead you force yourself shoulders back, force yourself to take a deep breath and turn to Aden, “Come on kid, let's go. You okay with stayin’ with me for a while?” 

“What’s going on?” Jason asked, walking into the room.

You turned to Aden, waiting until he nodded before you continue, “Aden just told Ma and Pops he’s gay and they told him to go to conversion therapy.”

Jason nods, “Good, it’ll help him.”

You scoff loudly, “You know what? I was so fuckin’ wrong about this family. Come on, Aden, we’re goin’,”

“You wait in the car, we’ll round up the others,” JJ said, placing her hand on your arm as she gives you a small smile. Aden follows you with his head down, hands in front as he anxiously picked at his nails.

You opened the passenger door for him, motioning for him to get in (the others could make do in the back for now, you needed to check on your brother). “Whatchya thinkin’?”

“I screwed all this up,” Aden whispers, “(Y/N)- I’m so sorry,”

“What? Hey, no,” Your answer is immediate, “Kid you did nothin’ wrong.”

“But now Mama and Pops don’t want anything to do with us, it’s just us.” Aden said, “I screwed it all up and now we’re back to square one.”

“Hey, no.” You keep your voice firm, “You did nothin’ wrong, what you told them is perfectly acceptable. It’s them that has the problem, a’ight? If that’s a make or break deal, then so be it.”

“But-”

“Kid, I would choose you over anyone, any day.” You said, “You’re my brother, which means you’re stuck with me for life. You hear me? I would rather have no one and still have you than have everyone without you,”

“But I-”

“You did nothin’ wrong.” You answer strongly. 

“(Y/N)-”

“No, kid, I won’t have you thinking anything bad about yourself because of this,”

“I was just going to say that I think you need to go to the hospital,” He said, pointing to your hand, which was already bruising and beginning to swell.

“I’ll be fine,” You said, shrugging him off. 

“Did you punch him?”

“Yep,” You replied, not one to lie to your brother, even about something like this. “He said some unacceptable things.”

“About me?”

“Yeah, kid. So I broke his nose.” 

“I think you also broke your hand,” Aden pointed out. 

“I did not break my hand.”

“Prove it.”

“How can I even prove that?”

“Straighten your hand.”

You stared at him, “Fine.” You begin to straighten your hand out, “Okay, you’re right,”

Rossi opened the door, “What’s the kid right about?”

“He broke his hand,” You stared at him in disbelief. “What? You weren’t gonna tell him.” You huffed.

“To the hospital we go,” Hotch chimed, motioning for you and Aden to move into the back so he and Rossi could sit up front with him driving. 

“Sir-”

“We don’t want to hear it,” Rossi said, you huffed once more glaring at Morgan as he laughed. 

And that’s how you ended up with a cast on your hand and a scowl.

[eluxcastar]

The little sisterfication of Signora

── ୨୧：la signora & reader

୨୧﹑synopsis :: we're back with the little sibling headcanons let's GOOO

୨୧﹑genre :: fluff

୨୧﹑content :: gn reader, young signora, use of signora’s real name, it's more ambiguous how much older reader is, not proofread

୨୧﹑words :: 1.1k

this has been planned for so long, but I struggle SO bad writing Signora tbh Idk why it's not like I don't know how to write arrogant anguished women. I love arrogant anguished women 😭 while I'm on that thought I came to the realisation reader is probably dead with Rostam which was just what I wanted to think. BUT BUT I DID try to sneak some details in so it can still be cute cough witch's flower of blaze

it feels weird every time I use their real names but also calling them by titles when we know their names feels wrong because if it's from the perspective of their sibling who would know and use their name 😔 I think because I'm not used to it I'm like who the hell is MILBURN PENNYBAGS that's PULCINELLA (I had to look up the Monopoly man's name for that joke you BETTER laugh)

all little siblingification posts

Rosalyne was, as children are, young and interested in learning, eager but never quite aware. She loved to trail along by your side as you took her up the mountains to find a patch of flowers, at which point she would plop down in the grass and get to work making herself a flower crown with an extra one so you could match. Since your mother taught her the secret, she had happily taken to it and off to the races she was, linking flowers and matching colours in pursuit of the prettiest arrangement she could make to be her crown.

She long ago decided that Windwheel Asters are among the best, with an interesting shape and fiery red to contrast her blonde hair. Calla Lilies have a similar colour but a bad shape for flower crowns, and Cecilias are too pale to stand out the way she'd like them to. Windwheel Asters are bold and show off her hard work better than any delicate flower could.

Of course, that means she must also find the perfect flower for you, and that's hard work, but she'll never stop trying. Rosalyne read in a book about an extinct flower called the Padisarah, a beautiful purple flower that even the Dendro Archon couldn't perfectly replicate, and decided it would've been perfect for you if it still existed. You suspect that it's only because she can't have it that she wants it, the allure of something mystical that exists only in the imagination.

She settles instead on the legends of a Liyue flower that blooms at the sound of beautiful music—Glaze Lily or something to that tune. Each time Rosalyne makes a flower crown for you with the next best thing she can find, she claims that one day she'll travel to Liyue, and when she does, she'll bring you back one to see how pretty they are as if she has some greater understanding looking at the same picture in her book as you did. Maybe she does.

There is no dream too big, not for Rosalyne. She is desperate for your approval at every turn and wants you to think she's as cool as she thinks you are. She wants to hear you smile with her despite seeming so far away at times. Her phase of being petty and squabbling with you is over at last, and she seeks the comfort of the one person she looks up to more than anybody for a guiding star to turn to—you.

Your parents are both far away future ideals for an older Rosalyne to aspire to be, maybe with that boy she likes, but you are not so distant. You're like her, if only older and barely wiser. She sees all that she wants in you, and it makes her look up to your guidance above all else. Her parents are the annoying rule makers who preside over her life and ruin her fun; you're the fun troublemaker who sleazes the both of you past the city guards and takes her headfirst into the danger of the mountains just so she can play.

Rosalyne thinks of an ambitious future, and your parents tell her to be careful; you tell her to chase it. Become a scholar and do as she pleases. She's more inclined towards your indulgent way of thinking. You have yet to stifle the burning passion she holds but recognise it, and in your mind, it's about as cool as dragons could ever be. It is not the worrisome uncertainty of instability and hardship that your parents think it is.

Her heart is set in a far-off place—Sumeru, the Akademiya, where she feels everything will fall into place like a fairytale. Rosalyne has it all figured out, down to the number of boys she'll reject in pursuit of that boy she has had a crush on since she was twelve.

Even you're not privy to that, subject to Rosalyne quickly closing her diary or turning away from you, hiding the gifts she managed to get him and letters she wrote out but never could quite work up the nerve to send. It used to be only one of the many instances that would have her yelling at you not to snoop, though it has dwindled to being only one of the very few instances, save for accidentally discovering her in the process of procuring your birthday gifts.

It used to be that you would be searching for your missing things, a few of which had disappeared suspiciously close to your birthday and were found the moment you were proudly presented those very items as gifts from your little sister, sometimes with a daring tale of how she acquired it for you. Most of the time, you acted surprised and grateful, maybe even added a comment about how you were glad you didn't have to get a new one since Rosalyne had gone out and done it for you. You hid your annoyance at her habit of stealing your things behind thoughts of how cute your mother thought it was that Rosalyne didn't want to be left out of getting to give you something.

Rosalyne does, however, realise the possible benefit of asking for your help with this boy once she gets over the embarrassment-driven beet-red cheeks and yelling at you. You cannot find her boy and drag him by the ear to her, but you could help her write a letter to him or teach her to wrap that gift she was holding onto. You can do any number of things to help her chances— except talk to him. You can't do that, or you'll give it away with that big mouth of yours.

You're not quite sure how she came to that conclusion.

Her acceptance to the Akademiya came all too quickly. Years seemed to fly by, and her quirks evened out into a young woman your parents were more comfortable sending away to another nation. Their fears of her immaturity and fiery passion dragging her down settled as she did. By the time you were ready to send her away, the encroaching elegance you had seen forming in her younger self blossomed until she carried herself with more confidence and grace than ever. 

Like your parents, you are ready to watch her pursue that dream and come home to see the boy she likes still waiting for her. You make sure she knows you'll be there too, maybe even come visit every now and then and see Sumeru for yourself.

As she leaves, you reveal what you've been hiding for her—a single red flower. You're not as practised at the art of making flower crowns, but you found her this. This is all you can offer that she can carry with her until it wilts away.

CROSSPOSTED ON AO3

[frankensteins-mt-dew]

Little things I loved in Haunted Mansion (2023)

I just saw Haunted Mansion for a second time, and yall,it's good. The way they were able to blend the horror with the goofy and make it feel like the ride. amazing.

(Spoilers under the cut) here's all the little things I loved about the movie

1- this ones probably not anything but a coincidence but when Ben and Alyssa first meet the streamers are placed between them. I grew up Mormon (its complicated now) and whenever we drew the veil between life and death it was always a bunch of squiggly lines, like the streamers. Idk if that's like a thing in other religions too but I just thought it was interesting.

2- Gabby straight up saying "Nah. We're out." The second she noticed the spooky shit. Its an accurate and appropriate response that's not really used in this genre.

3- on that note I love the idea that they were basically forced to come back/stay. It advances the narrative and keeps them at the setting but it's not a bottle episode. Or movie.

4- Forced 👏 proximity 👏found👏family. They're all in the same room like 90% of the time no matter where they're at. And when they split the party for too long shit goes down.

5- Ben talking about his wife and his grief. The whole scene with him telling his friends about her and how she died, and Bruce almost immediately making a probably not appropriate joke that just made everyone laugh. It felt so real, like a real conversation. And the ghost winks. I have definently had those in my life but never had a name for it

6- Also the way they talk about grief?! Howthey show different characters dealing with it. How no matter who it is its like "you're hurting.it's ok. Let's get through it together" amazing.

7- The entire cast brought their A game in this movie. They knew what kind of movie this was and totally went with it

8- They ride references were amazing. The stretching room. the doom buggy chair. The forever hallway. Constance Hatchaway. Gracey. THE HAT BOX GHOST. Crump being the last name of one of the imagineers and his manor looking like the ride in wdw.

9- The music was so good! The jazz influence. SUPERSTITION. Grim Grinning Ghosts being prominent but not overwhelming. I wish the ending song was longer though.

10- the way they showed the passage of time with the moon phases and different outifts

11- Gabby and Ben's relationship remaining undefined. Imo this was not the time for them to get together, at least not immediately, what with (gestures broadly to everything) going on. The flowers he gives her at the end could be a romantic gesture or one of friendship and gratitude. I like that whatever ishappening between them is taking its time, because its something they both need.

I know there's something I'm forgetting but I cant think of it now so if I remember it I'll add it later. I hope more people go to see it I would love to see a sequel. Maybe they explore phantom manor or mystic manor (actually I dont remember if that one actually has any ties to the other mansions/manors)

[lover-of-mine]

i think, in the beginning, tommy sl was connected with the gerrard one but know i don’t really know

i fear they are going to do a time skip since aisha was doing fitting for more fall/winter outfits so i think a time jump or maybe we start s8 with a scene (for us in the future) in the present and then pitch black "x weeks before" and we go back in time since gerrard and 8a ending could coincide with the opening scene

because i can't phantom the idea of gerrars staying at the 118 for more than a month

going back to tommy i think he's connected with gerrard but if we really have a time skip idk if he's going to be there as buck situationship but maybe as a mentor?

there is this ostark interview right after 7x04 where he said:

"I don't know what that story is going to end up being, but I would really like for Tommy to stay a part of Buck's life, regardless. He's obviously opened this door for him, and I think it would be really nice if [Tommy] was able to continue to hold [Buck's] hand and could help guide him through this process. As somebody who's a little older and more experienced, to kind of help shepherd Buck into this new phase of understanding who he is."

so maybe he’s going to stay to help buck

Okay, we need to stop with the Tommy as a mentor thing, PLEASE. It wasn't cute in April and now it's just wrong. That man has proved he doesn't understand Buck, what is he mentoring Buck on? Sex? In the show where the couple we saw get pregnant barely kisses? In the show where Buck gets an implied sex moment that's just Taylor and him going up the stairs? Come on. Also, we need to disregard anything they said during the 704 interviews because those happened before they had the scripts for 7b and before this chaos. Keeping Tommy in Buck's life after they break up in any capacity is feeding the situation, they released a scene that further undefines the relationship and highlighted how bad of a fit in Buck's life he is, if he stays in Buck's life, no matter how they do it, the madness will only get worse. They're not gonna risk feeding into a situation that even has people going after Aisha now.

We're not killing each other in some normal ship war. Tim himself is talking about how ugly things have gotten. No one wants to fuel this fire. Dragging it out will not accomplish something positive. They don't need Tommy to take down Gerrard. And the show needing to adapt to the circumstances in which it is airing includes adapting to everything that's happening now. Buck doesn't really need his hand held through his own feelings. And if he does it's not like he doesn't have queer people in his life who understand him better. I believe they had a plan to make Tommy a positive presence in Buck's life. But that went out the window the second this chaos started. They had chances to create some sort of emotional understanding between the two, looked it in the eye and ran the other way. If the season had actually given us something on screen that shows that they had some sort of emotional connection, then sure, I would sit my ass down and accept we are going there, but they didn't when there were very clear chances. And yeah, we're probably getting some sort of time jump, that's gonna drop Buck in a defined relationship, which is not gonna make anyone root for Tommy because we didn't see anything to justify them staying together, or it's gonna be months and they'll still be dancing around it, and for Evan wants to be a husband so bad Buckley it's just gonna be sad. They wrote a relationship that's a bad fit for Buck in universe and that's creating havoc for the production. That's gonna affect how they use him.

(ps because I realized this sounds a bit too aggressive, I know everyone wants this to be a nice experience for Buck, I want that too, but it's not what the show is actually doing, this isn't against you, I promise I'm not trying to be mean to you, I understand where you're coming from, I just think that ship has sailed)

[reactionimagesdaily]

REACTION IMAGES BLOG PATCH NOTES (aka the 10k follower celebrations got out of hand)

Hey everyone!

So it's been a hot minute since I announced that we passed 10,000 followers on here! I'm sure... well, I'm actually sure that most people won't be TOO fussed either way, but I did say I was gonna do some stuff, and I wanna stick to my word if nothing else xD

So! Let the celebrations begin! Firstly, I'm announcing a new QnA (I love those things) that'll last,,,, I'll say 2 weeks and go from there. Feel free to ask me about whatever you want!! If you want to cater to me specifically, my current big interests are Baldur's Gate 3, Cyberpunk 2077, Mass Effect, and uuuuh Halo. (Also Bionicle remains a constant.) (Lots of scifi videogame stuff at the moment...)

[IK there's still some stuff in the inbox I need to answer/respond to you - I promise I'll get to those as well <3 thank you so much for your patience, if you've been waiting]

Secondly, here's a new song cover! IDK how many of you have played the game Divinity: Original Sin 2, but here's me singing Lohse's song; Sing For Me.

Thirdly: here's a new gimmick blog! I Was Not Joking. (Though, for my sanity, it's gonna be weekly instead of daily.) I'll be posting the images I have saved in my folder called 'feral screenshots' - it'll basically be a collection of cursed images/images with strange auras. I wanna say y'all know the ones, but if you don't, then here's an example of what we're dealing with:

[Image ID: a person floating in a rubber ring in a swimming pool. On their head is what looks like a life-size Lego head.]

Introduciiiiing the Weekly Weird Images blog!

And Fourthly! It is my great pleasure to announce that we're adding alt text to all the images on this blog! Sorry it took so long to get round to T_T

And yes - I do mean we! To write out all the alt text for these images, I've on-boarded minion-in-chief/court jester aplomb @tizzytinkertilly! I (the reaction images guy) will still be handling every other part of the blog - she'll just be doing that bit. For the sake of my sanity xD

This is kind of a big change - both the addition of alt text, and the fact that this blog is no longer a single-person operation - so for the foreseeable future, the queue's been tweaked so that we only post 2 images a day instead of 4. (Fun fact! 2 images a day was the original MO of this blog, and then covid happened and I was like "I'll make it 4 a day because it'll be a nice thing to do for everyone while they're miserable in this pandemic :)" and then I never stopped (although you could argue that the pandemic never stopped either).) Maybe if/when we fall into a good routine and feel like we can do more, we can bump the rate of images back up, but right now this is a teething phase and I'm keen to slow things down for a little bit. :P (Tumblr has made some WEIRD mechanical choices for group blogs, I'll be honest.)

And, uh, yeah, that's all! Let the QnA begin- Hope y'all enjoy the song cover- Hope y'all enjoy the additional blog- A big welcome to Tinks and to alt text! Happy 10k followers, everybody!