#idk if this is interesting to anyone else or if it’s just like the obvious storyline of tit but i just wanted to write it out anyways | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

tsxkkis · 7 months ago

Text

# tsukishima kei - perfect match

a/n: watch me suddenly appear out of nowhere after the school year has finally ended to post something!! i'm sure absolutely no one is surprised that tsukishima is the centre of this fic, but tbh idk how to feel about it (it's definitely longer than my usual ones but i didn't proofread it, so idk if the lenght is an advantage or not) but i hope you'll like it ^^ with school being over for the next two months i'll finally have time to write, so expect more works soon!!

summary: you and tsukishima decide to help your friends get together, but the plan is long forgotten when you realize what your own feelings are.

warnings: nothing really, canon yamayachi (my loves), some light swearing, bad writing

tsukishima kei did not expect any of his friends to bother him in the middle of the night. hell, he didn't even expect any of them to disturb his alone time at all. and yet at exactly 2.34 in the morning, right as he was about to turn off his currently binge watched tv show and go to sleep, he felt his phone buzzing on the nightstand.

his eyes focused on your name, written in white font on his phone screen, surely shocked by the sight.

'why are you calling me at 2 in the goddamn morni-'

'is yamaguchi interested in anyone?'

your question caught him off-guard even more than the call itself, his brows furrowing in a weirded-out look.

'if you're asking for yourself, i'm positive that he is not interested.'

tsukishima heard a sigh of annoyance on the other side of the call and could only imagine the exact look on your face in this very moment.

'well, thank god, because i'm not asking for myself.' you said. there were muffled sounds of someone preparing food in the background. 'i'm asking for yachi.'

the blonde boy smiled unconsciously.

'he does like her.' the boy stated, turning off his laptop as he put it back on the desk. 'so much so, in fact, that it can be kind of annoying sometimes.'

you squealed with excitement, a giggle leaving your mouth at tsukishima's remark.

'perfect! now, listen carefully.'

that singular phone call created an alliance between you and kei. an alliance with only one goal; getting your two best friends to finally confess to each other. to both of you, it was almost infuriating how blind they were; how they didn't notice just how obvious it was that they both shared the same feeling. constant blushing at as little as a mention of the other's name, the stolen glances, the very obvious pining - all of it seemed to be non-existent in the eyes of both yamaguchi and yachi.

but lucky for them, you had a plan.

his eyes lingered on you for a few seconds, as if awaiting a sign from you. tsukishima still thought of your 'master plan' as rather silly, but seeing the determination on your face, and the frown that appeared when he called your idea stupid was enough for him to sigh and go with it this once.

the four of you were currently occupied with studying for a math test coming up next week, everyone nose deep in their notebooks. well, everyone except for kei.

the boy cleared his throat almost theatrically, drawing the attention of the three of you.

'yamaguchi, i think i'll have to pass on the movies this weekend.' he said, the tone of his voice as lifeless as ever. 'akiteru insisted that i go to one of his games, so i guess you'll have to take someone else.'

the freckled boy looked a little troubled upon hearing the information. both you and tsukishima were well aware that the tickets to the cinema were already paid for; yamaguchi would definitely be sad if it all went to waste.

'well, i guess i can ask hina-'

'yachi, didn't you tell me last week that you wanted to go to the movies with someone?' you barged in before the boy could even finish his sentence, your friend freezing in her spot at the mention of a conversation you had not that long ago, cheeks flushed pink at the mere thought of going somewhere with yamaguchi one-on-one. 'maybe you'd fill in for tsukki?'

the girl glanced at you, panic in her eyes as an awkward silence filled the room, everyone waiting for her to answer. you gave her an encouraging smile, as if trying to non-verbally tell her to go for it, to use this as a chance to get closer to the boy she liked for so long.

'if yamaguchi doesn't mind...' she mumbled quietly, head turning to face the boy who was already shaking his head.

'of course i don't.' yamaguchi smiled, his small dimples showing up in the process.

you glanced over to look at tsukishima, a triumphant smile on your face as if you just won a volleyball tournament. his hair was slightly messy, and his glasses were sliding off his nose, two of the top buttons on his school uniform unbuttoned, showing a bit of his collarbones. surprisingly enough, the blonde boy smiled back; a small, quick smile that your eyes barely noticed. you had no idea what it was, but something about that singular smile made your heart beat faster.

don't. the main focus of this entire thing is to get yachi and yamaguchi together. not to think of tsukishima and how attractive he looks-

shit.

developing a crush on tsukishima kei was certainly not part of your plan.

at first, you tried ignoring it as much as you could, focusing solely on your friends and getting them to date. as time went on and yamaguchi and yachi started getting closer, you almost felt a sense of relief - you could finally stop spending so much time around tsukishima, which made your chances of getting over your stupid crush higher.

but it wasn't as easy as you thought. tsukishima was intelligent, pretty, and his snarky remarks and judgy personality actually drew you to him even more with each passing day. through the countless conversations and numerous phone calls, he proved himself to be more than just a salty, mean guy that everyone viewed him as.

'soon enough, they won't even need our help.' you mumbled to yourself as you opened your bento box, a smile on your face as you noticed your mom homemade onigiri inside. 'i don't know what i'll do with myself then.'

tsukishima scoffed, closing the textbook in front of him.

'maybe start focusing on your own love life for once.'

'hey! it's not my fault that i'm a good friend.' you stated, mouth full of food, as you looked up at your friend sitting on the opposite side of the table, looking through the tasks assigned for next week. 'besides, it's not like i'm the only one.'

tsukishima adjusted his glasses, looking up at you for a mere second before focusing back on his notebook.

'touché.'

'oh, come on.' you whined out, dissatisfied with the lack of response from the blonde boy. 'you won't miss this even a little bit?'

alright, maybe just a bit-

'no.' tsukishima stated firmly, fixing his posture as he highlighted one of the important sentences written down. you heard a bit of hesitation in his voice, and the few seconds of silence before hearing an answer couldn't help but make you wonder. you decided to ignore it this time - he was focused on something else right now, there was no need to disturb him.

'do you think yachi will like my outfit?'

tsukishima was sitting at the edge of his best friend's bed, mindlessly scrolling through his phone and occasionally looking up to see the twelfth - no, thirteenth shirt that yamaguchi has tried on already. the boy sighed, turning his device off.

'it's your first official date, i'm sure she doesn't mind what you wear.' he stated, gaining a frown from yamaguchi.

'you didn't answer my question.'

'alright, i think she'll like it.' the blonde haired boy said, reaching out for a bag of chips, opening it with a loud sound. 'but i'm sure she'll focus more on the date itself rather than what you're wearing.'

ever since announcing to their friends that they're going on their first official date, both yamaguchi and yachi were full of stress, constantly overthinking every little detail from their outfit to whether or not the date will go well or not. tsukishima found it rather comical - it was only a date after all. why stress over it so much? he never went on one, obviously, but he always thought that when the day came, he'd approach it calmly.

'do you have any tips on how to not freak out?' yamaguchi asked suddenly, catching his friend off-guard. 'during the date, i mean.'

'how can i know? i've never gone on one.'

the freckled boy looked at tsukishima, a confused expression on his face as he processed his words.

'oh.' he paused for a second, his voice quieter when he continued speaking. 'i thought you and y/n were, you know, a thing.'

huh?

to say tsukishima was shocked was an understatement. he genuinely had no idea what to say; he never even let a thought of you and him being more than friends, 'partners in crime', as you loved to say, slip through his mind. never did it occur to him that someone from the outside would see your relationship as being something more than a merely platonic one.

well, maybe there was something to it after all.

yamaguchi's words made him wonder - although he did find you annoying at times, it was only occasionally and to a very little degree. that in itself was very rare in tsukishima's eyes, as he found most of the people surrounding him at least normally annoying. you, on the other hand, were a completely different case. your jokes, no matter how awkward or downright cringe, made him crack a silent laugh more often than not, and every time he saw you smile, his lips uncontrollably curved up into a small, barely noticeable one themselves.

'oh, no, absolutely not.' the blonde blurted out after a long minute of silence, the tips of his ears turning a bright shade of red. 'there is not a single bone in my body that would want to date her. now get up idiot, or you'll be late to your date.'

the moment tsukishima opened his bedroom, after walking his friend to the bus stop, he immediately plopped down on his bed, phone in hand, instinctively opening messages to write to you. surprisingly enough, a message was already waiting for him.

'yachi almost cried because of how stressed she is T-T'

'do you think we should spy on them to make sure it all goes well?'

he found himself smiling at the words on his phone screen, quickly typing back an answer.

'do you really not have a life of your own?'

'idiot.'

only after a few minutes did he get a response from you.

'can i come over?? i'm bored :33'

a harmless message, one might think. in reality, tsukishima was freaking out at the mere thought of hanging out with you for a reason other than setting up your friends, his cheeks a light shade of pink as his eyes kept digging a hole through his phone.

you weren't any better than him - hands slightly shaky as you awaited a response for what felt like hours, but was actually just a few minutes. you had no idea what took over you; was it a sudden wave of bravery or rather an idiotic spontaneous choice to ask tsukishima that. but nonetheless, when you finally got the response, you felt ecstatic.

'alright.'

'bring some snacks.'

'kei, i think yamaguchi is he- oh, that's certainly a new face.'

you stood in front of the door with an awkward smile, facing tsukishima's older brother, akiteru, his eyes scanning you from head to toe. to say he was surprised was an understatement - he looked as if he'd seen a ghost. as if a friend that's not yamaguchi coming over to tsukishima's house was so out of the ordinary that it could become a national holiday.

'come in.' the younger male appeared in the back of the hall, an oversized dinosaur shirt and shorts on. his expression was softer than usual; not until he looked at his brother, whom he gave a sharp stare, signaling him to let you inside and don't make such a fuss about it.

you sat down on his bed, awkward silence filling up the room. not wanting to make the conversation about your friends as per usual, you slowly realized you don't know what to talk about, trying to think of something, anything, as you began unpacking your bag filled with snacks.

surprisingly enough, it was tsukishima who spoke up first.

'wanna watch a movie?' he asked, opening his drawer to pull out two bottles of soda, hidden there so that his brother doesn't devour all of them. 'unless it'll make you even more bored than you were before.'

'well, if you have a boring taste in movies-'

'says the one who looks like their favorite movie is mamma mia.' tsukishima scoffed under his breath, turning his laptop on and starting to search up movies. you looked at him, a dramatic expression as you pretended to be offended.

'and you look like you're about to mansplain the godfather to me.'

a short silence filled the room before you heard the blonde boy let out a short, muffled laugh at your comment.

'you couldn't be more wrong.' he sat down next to you, a small smile still on his face. 'i found it kind of boring, actually.'

'what do you like, then?'

'horror movies.' tsukishima stated, eyes focused on the screen. 'but tadashi gets easily scared, so i often don't have a chance to watch them.'

'same with me and yachi.' you said, unconsciously scooping a bit closer to the boy as you tried to get a better look at what he was searching up. 'i love them, but yachi jumps at every small scare on the screen. sometimes, she even gets scared when there's nothing happening at all.'

'they really do match each other.' he mumbled, putting the laptop on the bed as he pressed play on a movie he chose. his eyes quickly glanced your way to get a nod of approval on his choice.

'yeah, they do.'

and we could, too.

'are you and tsukishima dating?'

you almost spat out your drink, the words coming out of hinata's mouth catching you so off-guard you were close to choking.

the three of you, along with kageyama, were currently cleaning up after volleyball practice, the boys racing on who would clean more balls off of the floor.

'no, we're not.' you said in a clearly sad tone with an obvious hint of dissatisfaction in your voice. 'what the hell made you think that way?'

the orange haired boy stopped in his tracks, his signature smile disappearing for a minute as he got lost in his own thoughts.

'oh! i remember now.' he said after a short while, his grin coming back. 'yamaguchi told me that you two are close.'

'he did also mention that he seems happier around you.' kageyama added, joining the conversation. 'seeing tsukishima happy must be pretty scary.'

not really, you thought. but at the same time, what confused you more was what kageyama said right before.

he seems happier around you.

yamaguchi has been kei's friend for the longest time, so any of his observations must be true, or at least that's what you liked to believe. but would that mean that tsukishima kei, the salty, closed-off guy whom everyone finds intimidating could possibly like you? was there truly a possibility that he enjoyed spending time with you?

as you finished cleaning up the hall, saying your goodbyes to your two friends who ran off to practice volleyball somewhere else, a familiar, tall figure appeared in the doorframe, sharp eyes staring at you with an expression that you couldn't exactly decipher.

'want me to walk you home?' he asked, hands in his pockets. 'it's getting late.'

you looked at him, trying to hide the blush creeping up onto your cheeks before quickly nodding as an answer.

'sure, let's go.'

most of the walk was filled with silence on both parts, exactly as you expected. even though it might've felt awkward for some, you did enjoy his presence in itself enough that a conversation wasn't necessary.

the boy stopped in his tracks mid-way, reaching into his backpack and pulling out his phone and an old pair of white, wired earphones, showing them to you as a silent question of whether you wanted to listen to music with him or not. you agreed without a second thought, a small smile on your face as he put on one of his playlists.

'i really like this song.' you mumbled, eyes lighting up upon hearing the familiar melody. with both of you wearing the same set of headphones right now, you were practically forced to walk closer to each other - hands constantly brushing against one another, a faint blush on your face as you tried to ignore it and focus on the music.

tsukishima, on the other hand, couldn't shake away the thoughts roaming around his head. he felt as if what he was doing now was incredibly unlike him; and maybe it was. but for some reason, he didn't mind being like this around you. less cocky, sarcastic, mean and more... gentle.

he could feel his fingers brushing against yours from time to time, and it drove him crazy. should he go for it and play it off nonchalantly, or just ignore it? should he even make the first move or wait for you to do it?

before he was able to decide, tsukishima felt your hand reaching for his, heart rate immediately speeding up as your fingers shyly intertwined with his, looking the other way to hide your anxious expression.

his hand was much bigger than yours, but somehow it fit perfectly with yours. as if they were created solely to hold one another and nothing else. the plan to get your friends to be together was long forgotten by now - your mind was clouded with thoughts of tsukishima only, and little did you know that his wasn't any different.

you glanced his way only to find his eyes already on you, hiding his true feelings behind a nonchalant look. only now did you notice that the two of you were standing in front of your house, the boy adjusting his glasses as he waited to see what you'll do next.

'i guess i should go home now.' you mumbled, but you still didn't move an inch, hand not leaving his. 'see you tomorrow?'

his hand squeezed yours tightly before taking it away, an unusually warm and welcoming smile on his face.

'sure. see you tomorrow, idiot.'

but as you slowly made your way towards the door, tsukishima couldn't shake away the feeling in him, telling him to go for it. and as much as he tried to resist it, he just couldn't anymore.

'wait.’

before you could fully turn away, tsukishima kei's lips were already on yours, a sweet, long kiss that felt as if he was waiting to do it for years. his hand traveled to your waist and it didn't take long for you to react; lips moving swiftly with his, noses bumping into one another before you pulled away, a giggle escaping your mouth as you saw just how red tsukishima's face was.

‘don't laugh at me, moron.’ he said, immediately catching the reason for your laughter as he flicked you in the forehead. ‘your whole face is red, too.’

‘i didn't expect you to do this.’ you mumbled, eyes focused on his as you reached to hold his hand again. ‘didn't expect my feelings to be mutual, either.’

‘i'm glad we feel the same.’ his face leaned in closer to yours, a wave of confidence taking over him as he placed a short kiss on your forehead. ‘but i would still prefer to properly ask you out. if you'd say yes, that is.’

‘of course i would.’ you smiled, ‘i'd be stupid not to.’

‘should we bet on how long it takes the others to realize we're dating now?’ tsukishima smiled at you, eyes not leaving yours for even a spare second. you laughed at his idea, giving his hand a squeeze.

‘get ready to lose, kei.’

‘you wish.’

taglist: @moonswolfie

#tsxkkis #tsukishima kei #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima kei x reader #karasuno x reader #tsukishima fluff #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fluff

1K notes · View notes

taeyongdoyoung · 5 months ago

Text

teddy bear

summary: you discover your best friend's dirty little secret but after the initial anger passes, you are excited... pairing: haechan x reader genre: smut, best friends to lovers warnings: non-consensual filming/hidden camera, perv!haechan (wbk), but ALSO perv!reader, allusions to masturbation, lowkey dubcon but not rlly, face-sitting, eating out, blowjob, unprotected piv sex, boob touching, switch!haechan, inexperienced!reader, pet names, oh yeah and kissing (ew) author's note: idk what this is but 🎵 i've been a nasty guuuurl, nasty, is somebody gonna match my 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴 🎵 word count: 2k

If there is one person in this universe you’d trust with your life, that person would be Haechan. He’s always been there for you, through the highs and lows of your life. So, when you discover how he’d betrayed you, you feel like your world comes crashing down on you with all of its weight and injustice.

You accidentally find something you’d never expected would happen to you. A hidden camera in the teddy bear Haechan had gifted you a year ago. You can’t believe it. You don’t perceive yourself as a particularly interesting person. You don’t do much in your room. Except…

The idea that Haechan had seen you in your most private, vulnerable moments sends chills down your spine. You feel mortified, embarrassed but most of all, angry. How could he do this to you? How could he film you in secret without your permission? How could he betray your trust like that? And worst of all, how could a part of you get excited about that?

You invite your best friend Haechan over on a whim. With the initial plan to confront him, maybe threaten him with this newfound knowledge a little, things take an unexpected turn.

“Hey, darling, how have you been?” Haechan asks as he enters your apartment.

“Oh, don’t you ‘darling’ me, you creep!” you immediately accuse him.

“What did I do?” he tries to play it dumb but you can see it in his eyes that he knows exactly what crime he’s guilty of.

“I found the camera…inside the teddy bear,” you get straight to the point, dragging him by the hand to your room and showing him the evidence.

Maybe this is unwise. Maybe a sane person would go to the police rightaway. Maybe you should file a restraining order. But the thought of living without Haechan feels more painful than the thought he’d done something so sick. Maybe you’re just as sick in the head.

“So, you found it,” he states the obvious.

��Aren’t you gonna say anything to defend yourself? Like, maybe it came like that and you didn’t know it had a camera,” you attempt to find a logical explanation.

“Oh, I knew, alright,” Haechan confesses.

You punch his arm lightly, not meaning to actually hurt him, but he’s taken aback nonetheless.

“How could you do this to me? I trusted you with my life,” you cry out, your eyes welling up with tears.

“I promise no one else has seen the footage. I would never show it to anyone.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” you sniffle. “You saw me…naked. No, scratch that, you saw me touching myself, saw me crying all alone, saw me at my most pathetic.”

“There was never anything pathetic about you, precious. You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen and I’m so sorry I made. I just…admire you so much that I did something wrong. I know it’s unhealthy that I want to look at you all the time but I couldn’t help it. I’d do anything to make you forgive me,” Haechan promises.

“Anything?” you ask, your eyebrow raising in interest, a sinful idea already forming in your head.

“You name it. If you wanna report me to the police, go for it, as long as you forgive me one day.”

“I’m not gonna report you,” you say calmly. “But I do want a favour.”

“Whatever you wish, sweetheart,” Haechan blinks at you with so much affection and dedication you know you’re making the right choice.

“You’ve probably seen me…well, struggling to reach an orgasm,” you murmur shyly. “When I feel it coming, my fingers get so tired and I just…stop in the middle of nowhere. I was wondering if you can help me with that?”

You phrase it as a question but it’s actually a demand. If Haechan wants your forgiveness so badly, he’s gonna have to earn it.

“Sit on my face,” he offers.

“Huh?”

“Go on, then. I’ll help you out, just relax and let me take care of you.”

Fuck, his words have such an immediate effect on you that you rush to take off your shorts and comfortable panties you wear at home and you don’t have the time to feel self-conscious.

Haechan seems more eager than you and pulls you closer than ever. As you make yourself comfortable on top of him, he quickly dives in, licking your pussy with so much enthusiasm that you already know he’s gonna make you feel so good. You grab his hair a bit harshly and he moans against your folds, the sound sending vibrations to your core. Arching your back, you search the long-awaited release as Haechan digs his nails into your thighs, holding onto you for support. His tongue fucks into you from below in ways you didn’t think possible. You cry out his name unabashedly as you come all over his too pretty for this world face.

You collapse backwards, head falling near his legs. As the haze of your orgasm begins to wear off, you notice Haechan’s hard cock straining against the confines of his jeans. Another idea has already been planted in your brain.

“Am I forgiven yet?” Haechan wonders with an adorable pout. You want to kiss him stupid but decide to torture him a little longer.

“Not yet,” you chuckle. “But it’s a good start. Now, I want you to teach me how to suck a cock.”

His pained expression tells you volumes.

“W-why?” he stutters.

“Oh, I don’t know. I’m not very experienced and I wouldn’t want to embarrass myself in front of guys. So, show me the right way.”

Haechan gulps anxiously. Is he jealous of these hypothetical future guys. You don’t tell him that he is the only guy you want to touch, that would give his ego an unnecessary boost. And you don’t want that. You want him to think that him being forgiven is dependent on whether he does as you wish.

“Okay. Well, to be honest, most guys just prefer fucking a girl’s mouth, or so I’ve heard. So, you wouldn’t have to do much. But I can still show you the basics.”

You nod eagerly and unbutton his jeans. Haechan gently guides you to his cock.

“Lick the tip. You don’t have to fit it all in your mouth.”

You follow his instructions excitedly and envelop your lips around his length. It’s not super long but its thickness poses a delicious challenge. Your mouth can’t possibly widen any further so you also start touching him with your small hands.

“That’s good, you’re doing so well for me,” Haechan praises you and his words make you even more enthusiastic. Your eyes teary and your throat hurting but he strokes your hair so sweetly and you must be fucked up because you don’t want this to end.

Licking and groping to the best of your abilities, his release comes sooner than expected. Are you really that good or is he just whipped for you? You try to swallow his cum but there is so much of it that as soon as your lips leave his cock so you can breathe properly, his cum comes spilling down your chest.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” Haechan apologizes for making a mess.

You shake your head and can’t resist the temptation any longer so you crash your mouth against his in a sick, feverish kiss. He appears taken aback but kisses you back with just as much passion, if not more. He buries his hand in your hair, tilting your head back, practically fucking your face with his own. He bites your lips and touches your cheek with his other hand, as you completely melt for him.

“You like this?” Haechan chuckles in disbelief once he breaks the kiss. “You like being kissed by your best friend who’s been getting off on footage of you in secret?”

“Does that make me a weirdo?” you grin wickedly.

“Oh, definitely. But I wouldn’t have it any other way,” Haechan says.

“I want you to fuck me,” you blurt out suddenly, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“Are you sure?” his eyes widen in shock.

“Please?”

“Your wish is my command, princess,” Haechan responds. “Do you want to be on top?”

“I don’t know, whatever works best for you,” you really don’t care about the positions, you just need this freak inside of you. Okay, you realize you’re just as freaky but oh well.

“Wanna try riding me and if you get tired, I’ll take over?” Haechan suggests softly.

“Alright, let’s try that,” you agree quickly and take your top off.

“Oh,” Haechan licks his dry lips in surprise.

“What?”

“You’re not wearing a bra,” he states the obvious.

“So? I’m at my own home, it feels more comfortable that way.”

“I know but…you asked me over knowing that I’ve put a camera in that bear and you’re not wearing-”

“Haechan, do me another favour and stop overthinking, okay?”

He nods again, still staring at your boobs.

“Do you want to touch them?” you laugh because his face looks priceless.

“May I?” Haechan asks politely. God, he’s so cute you want to eat him up. He’s also the most perverted guy you’ve ever met. So basically perfect for you.

“Yes, do whatever you want, I trust you,” you admit even though it is probably foolish. But it is true.

Haechan envelops his hands around your tits as you climb on top of him, letting his cock slide in. You’re so wet for him it happens so smoothly, as if you were meant to fit in together. He plays with your nipples gently and you ride him, moving your hips up and down.

“You can be more rough, I’m not gonna break,” you tell him honestly.

Haechan isn’t sure exactly what you mean by that but tries his best to not disappoint you. He pinches your nipples, squeezing your boobs a little more harshly and eliciting sweet moans out of you. Then, he bucks his hips upwards to meet your wetness, fucking into you from below with impressive speed and eagerness. You are beginning to grow tired, chasing an orgasm that feels so close, yet out of reach.

“Please, take over, I don’t think I can do this,” you pout pitifully.

“Sure, angel,” Haechan flips you over so that you are now lying on your back and fucks you hard and sweet.

“Make me come, Haechan, please, please, please,” you beg him desperately.

“Let go for me, baby, that’s it,” he encourages you and who are you to argue with him?

Your orgasm hits you so suddenly and you feel yourself babbling nonsense. Soon after, he releases his seed inside or you, making you lose your mind even further. You feel so deliciously full you wish you could stay trapped in this moment forever.

Haechan slides out of you and brings you a bottle of water. You greedily accept it and after your thirst is satiated, give the rest to him. He drinks a bit and then leaves it on the bed. You look at him without saying anything and he does the same for a while. Haechan strokes your hair and you lean into his comforting touch. The silence is in no way uncomfortable but you are still plagued by thoughts. What’s next? Pure friendship is out of the question. You like him too much to entertain the thought of him with someone else. But does he feel the same?

“I don’t want to suck other guys’ cocks. In case it wasn’t obvious,” you admit without thinking of the consequences. “Do you…want to sleep with other people?”

Haechan shakes his head.

“Your ten personalities provide plenty of entertainment for me,” he jokes.

You shove him lightly, unable to contain your giggles. He grabs your wrists and kisses them fondly.

“You’re such a brat,” you say but it’s a compliment.

“Alexa play Charli XCX’s new album” Haechan shrugs.

“I sometimes wish I could be a brat, too,” you sigh wistfully.

“You? No way, you’re my good girl,” he squeezes your cheeks dotingly.

“Challenge accepted,” you give him a wink.

“Fine, fine, I’ll try my best to teach you my brattish ways,” he vows generously.

“It’s a date,” you clap your hands with unrestrained excitement.

“So…am I forgiven?” Haechan asks one last time.

You laugh and wrap your arms around him in a hug.

“On one condition,” you whisper in his ear with a smirk. “You take the teddy bear to your place. It’s my turn to look at you whenever I like.”

The End

#nct #haechan #nct smut #haechan smut #nct dream smut #lee donghyuck smut #nct 127 smut #haechan x reader #nct hard thoughts #nct hard hours #haechan hard thoughts #haechan hard hours #nct imagines #haechan imagines #writing

845 notes · View notes

shepscapades · 6 months ago

Note

looking through your docsuma tag.....love them. wish they had one more combined braincell so they could realize their feelings

HERE'S THE THING THOUGH OKAY the problem is actually that they're both too smart about their feelings. you've got me down a horrible rabbit hole okay let me do my best to explain without being a freak(reading this back over, i failed <3).

Xisuma takes longer to realize, first of all. He's got so much to deal with coming out of s8 and through the beginning of s9 that quite frankly he's really just grateful to have another friend he can count on and trust, and he's so consumed by getting the androids back in working order on top of his actual season 9 plans (on top of Cleo shoving self care down his throat and demanding that he make a better habit of taking breaks and taking care of himself, which takes a LONG time to adjust to, if it can be argued that he ever does) that he doesn't really realize he's developed feelings for Doc until his heart beats him over the head with it randomly one day. Probably sometime in S10. Even then, because of said busy-ness, I think Xisuma has a very hard time getting over the meta-ness of a creator developing feelings for his creation and the selfishness of that reality amidst all of his other responsibilities, and he is likely too scared/overwhelmed to entertain the thought of the feelings themselves, much less the likelihood of reciprocation or the fantasy of a relationship.

Doc, on the other hand, realizes he is developing feelings for Xisuma kind of steadily throughout the course of s9, since that's when they start spending so much more time together in the lab working on androids and improving android tech. As a general statement, Doc is very aware of himself, all of the time. His awareness of the self is very important to his sense of normalcy and control, so any time he experiences a new emotion, he notes it, logs it.

So, while he's very aware of the feelings he's developing as they happen, he doesn't quite put a name to it/realize what it actually is until he talks to Tango and Etho, funnily enough--It's definitely one of those moments where Tango or Etho or whomever are explaining their struggles with the physical manifestations of their... idk, lovesickness-- ie, thirium pump rate irregularities, temperature fluctuations, influxes of feelings they've described as a combination of longing, affection, want, happiness, yearning... and Doc, as the unbiased third party to put 2 and 2 together, explains to them that those are obvious signs of romantic attraction, only very belatedly realizing several hours later that those are the exact symptoms he hasn't quite been able to put a name to. Naturally he's exceptional about being quiet about this realization until he slips up during a maintenance check-in with Tango sometime after, who is not doing well in s9, and Tango (mid romance-ranting) catches the passing of a wistful expression on Doc's face and calls him out for "totally thinking about someone right now" (Teasing aside, tango promises to keep Doc's secret).

So, despite knowing well his feelings before X ever develops his own, Doc is actually very, very careful about them-- He knows more than anyone else how busy Xisuma is. He knows how stressed X is. He also knows Xisuma seems to be more knowledgeable when it comes to emotions and feelings, and despite the clear signs that Xisuma shows interest(?) in him as well, Doc can only assume there is a good reason nothing romantic has happened between them-- he trusts Xisuma more than anything, and he--firmly-- will not breach this trust by acting on something Xisuma does not seem to be ready for (or does not seem to want yet(yet?)). Therefore, Doc is patient, and even though as Season 10 develops and Doc becomes aware of the likelihood that Xisuma could return the feelings, he trusts Xisuma's emotional intuition more than anything. He, painfully, recognizes Xisuma's discomfort (or hesitation), concludes that there must be a missing variable in this equation he cannot grasp, and decides to let Xisuma lead because of it. He will not push farther than he feels Xisuma has.

It's definitely one of those "fell first" "fell harder" type situations I think. I'm normal about them. can you tell

#long post #dbhc #dbhc ask #dbhc doc #dbhc xisuma #docsuma #ask #anon #get me out of here #im not okay about them #bye #let me know if i should put that under a read more i coulodn't find a good spot for it so i decided not to but also its kinda long so #lays face down on the floor

336 notes · View notes

bizbat · 11 months ago

Note

your jason todd hcs are sooooo good omg!!! do you have any hcs specifically for when he has a crush on the reader, like how he might act, specifically if the reader is oblivious and really doesn’t think that she’s his type / thinks he’s joking if he says anything flirty?

When They're In Love - Jason Todd (Crush Edition)

🕸️Spiderverse Masterlist🕸️

🐼JJK Masterlist🐼

~ Fem terms + Pet names used for reader.

~ You can find part one of these hcs here, and part two here.

~ You can find more of my works here.

~ These can be read as a sort of part three/prequel kinda.

~Fic at the end.

~ Tw for : Blood, Knives, Needles, Vomit. (All slight)

~Thank you for asking! Hope you enjoy, sorry this took so long :(

You would never know that Jason has a crush on you.

For the most part, he wont talk to you any differently than he will anyone else.

Maybe he won't jokingly insult you, or be super sarcastic around you, but I think that's kind of as far as he'd go.

Unless you're a close friend or family member, you'd probably have no clue he had a crush based on the way he talks to you.

But the little actions and things he does for you are so obvious.

He's the type to hold open doors for you, all the while staring other people dead in the eye as it shuts in their face.

He somehow always just "randomly" has your favorite snack on hand, or a whole collection of books by your favorite author.

I think he'd be touchy, unless he knows you don't like being touched.

If you like or don't mind it, he'd have his arm constantly thrown over your shoulder, always be leaning against you, always resting a hand on your hip.

If you're shorter than him, he does that super annoying thing where he rests his elbow on your head.

He is so lame omg.

But bc he's kinda like this with everyone, no one would fault you for not understanding his hints.

He's like the opposite though.

You said hi to him this morning? You must be in love with him.

You smiled at him today instead of Dick? He's already planning the wedding.

What's that? You said he smells nice? Have his babies. (If you can/want to)

Our delusional king.

He doesn't think you don't get his flirting.

He'd think you're fully aware and are flirting back.

Again, our delusional king.

You probably won't get it until something really serious happens and he comes to you instead of Bruce or Roy.

He'd probably try to get into things you're interested in.

Listens to all your favorite songs, reads your favorite books, etc.

And he's not subtle about it bc he is in fact, a loser.

He'll recommend a song by your favorite artist and then be like "idk why but this just reminded me of you lol"

LOSER. Can you guys tell i'm a big believer in the "jason todd is secretly a massive loser" agenda? Cuz I am. :|

And then he listens when you go on rambles about how great the things you like are and how much they mean to you.

I said he'll do things just to hear you talk about them, and I think he'd do that when he has a crush on you too.

He just loves your voice and likes hearing you talk.

He smiles at you so softly when he thinks you aren't looking.

You could be bumming out and he'll look at you with heart eyes like yeah, future spouse right there.

I don't think he'd be a big user of social media, but if you were, he'd get a whole account just to like and comment of your pictures.

user94820860038466 commented: You look very pretty in this picture.

Comments like an old man bc he has very little understanding of the internet.

He'd probably help you take pictures and fight with other people in your comment section if they're too down bad or creepy.

He doesn't strike me as the jealous type bc once again, he's so delusional he pretty much already thinks you're dating.

Nicknames nicknames nicknames.

Calls you so, so many nicknames.

Angel, doll, sweetheart, maybe even babe.

He constantly talks about you when you aren't there.

Lian and Roy know so much about you before they even meet you.

He'd do anything for you.

The store is actually about a mile in the other direction, but yeah he can get you your favorite drink.

He does not like that food at all and the owner of the store despises him, but he will not return to you empty handed best believe.

He was actually going to wear that hoodie today, but it looks so much better on you you should keep it!

~ Drabble Starts Here. ~

It's just like every other night in Gotham City. It's cold, and wet, and it smells like smoke and garbage that's been left out in the sun.

The only barrier between you and the chilled, musty air outside is a single sheet of glass; the fire escape window of your fifth floor apartment. It's comforting. The glass is, of course, bulletproof, and the seal around the sill is tight, so no gases ever manage seep in. It pays to have a decent landlord, especially in Gotham.

It's funny, but you really never think about that window. You mostly keep it shut and locked, except in the summer, when you can smell your neighbor in the building next door cooking all types of delicious aromatic dishes, or when it's just too hot and you decide the risk of heatstroke is greater than the risk of airborne psychosis. It never occurs to you just how well it keeps you safe, just how well it keeps things out.

It occurs to Jason, though. In fact, it's the only thing on his mind as he's gripping his side, frantically trying to prevent too much blood from seeping out of his body.

He'll probably chastise himself later for not being more gentle or respectful, but he's lost too much blood to be thinking straight. With his free hand, he bangs on your window, praying that you're A) at home, and B) not listening to music. He's not too worried about the first one, he knows you never leave your lights on when you're away, but the second one, he's not too sure about.

He bangs, and bangs, and bangs on the glass, a loud, thunk thunk thunk thunk thunk that immediately rouses your from your sleep. You jump up from your spot on the couch, an open book falling from your lap as you dart into your room to grab the knife Jay gave you for protection, before returning to your living room, keeping your back to the wall.

You hold the blade in front of you, nervously gripping the hilt as you listen to the banging, making sure to stay just out of sight as you cautiously creep closer and closer to the noise. It isn't until the banging dies down that you finally get close enough to see the cause.

You gasp at the sight, dropping the knife and trying to tug the window open, before mentally yelling at yourself to unlock it. You drag the weakened behemoth of a man into your apartment, carefully placing his upper body on the floor in front of your window and removing his helmet. Your hand moves to his side, firmly pressing down on his wound, as you stare at him, mouth agape and eyes flooding with concern.

He laughs, a dry chuckle that just sounds like it hurts. "What took ya' doll?" You wanna smack him, but you can do that when he's not bleeding all over your hardwood floors. You tell him to wait, as if he could go anywhere in the state he's in, before rushing to grab the emergency kit he forced you to keep.

"Let-ngh- let me do it." He groans as he attempts to sit up, trying and failing to pull the tweezers from your hand. He doesn't even have the strength to sit back up when you gently push him back down. You clean his wound, all while he holds back winces and groans. You don't hold back, focusing on cutting and cleaning and stitching and wrapping, berating Jason for coming to you of all people.

"What d'ya mean? Of course I'd come to you?" Jason manages between harsh breaths. "Who else would I go to?" He seems genuinely confused, you're his girlfriend, you always come to him when you need help. Why wouldn't he come to you?

"Oh, I don't know, Jason, maybe Bruce, or Roy, or literally anyone else with training to handle this kind of thing!?" It comes out mean, but through his pain he can tell it's coming from a place of true care. You're worried. One of the strongest, most skilled people you know is bleeding out on your floor and you're panicking. Of course you are, you've never had to sew someone up, or dig a bullet out of someone, or try to hold down bile from the heavy smell of blood.

Your hands are shaking like crazy. This isn't a slight graze you can put a bandaid over and seal with a kiss, this is a life threatening wound on someone you care about, and all they've been doing since they came to you is make stupid fucking jokes and try to take things from your hands.

Jason can tell it's getting to you.

It should be the other way around, what with him bleeding out in your living room, but he quiets down, gripping your wrist with his non-blood covered hand. "Hey," He gently strokes your skin with his thumb, repeating himself when you don't move your eyes from his wound. "Hey, look at me Y/n." It's just stern enough to make you obey, without sounding like he's mad at you. "It'll be okay. I'm in good hands." Jason smiles at you, tired and reassuring. It calms your nerves just enough for you to finish sewing his wound shut.

You sit back when you're done, taking in your work once you wrap his stomach with gauze. Jason turns just enough to catch a glimpse, smiling up at you with his stupid, charming smirk. "Not bad, doll. Told ya you had it covered." He lays back, smiling up at you as he lays his head on his arm, the one on his non-injured side. Though he doesn't seem to bothered by the end of it all, you can't say the same.

He takes in your features, your tired, glossy eyes and your pouting lips. It makes his smile drop. You look away, your sad eyes not meeting his own. "I . . . what? What's wrong Y/n?" Jason winces, moving to rest on his elbows to get a better look at your face. "Was it the blood? Or the- was it the window? I'm sorry about that, by the way." You shake your head no at all of his suggestions, taking a breath before turning back to face him.

He can feel his heart hurt at the sight of unshed tears in your eyes. "I . . . I was scared Jay." He pushes himself all the way up when you take your lip into your mouth. He ignores the pain shooting through his side when he pulls you into his arms. "Hey, hey, hey, scared of what? I'm okay. You did good." Those tears finally spill when your arms wrap around his waist, loose as to not further irritate his wound.

"You could've died Jay, a-and I wouldn't be able to-to help you! I can't help you!" You sob into his shoulder. He holds you tightly, pressing his lips to your head as he rubs your back. "Please, please don't cry. I'm okay now, you helped me. I'm all better now." He rocks you both gently, trying to console you. "Sides, if I was gonna die, I'd be happy if it was with my girl."

What?

You freeze in his arms, and he knows he said something wrong. He just doesn't know what. His brain moves a mile a minute as he tries to figure out what it was before you get even more upset. Though, his brain completely shuts down when you stare up at him with those cute, confused eyes. The tears have slowed down, and he's at least thankful for that. "Your . . . girl?" Now he's confused too. "What-what do you mean by that?"

He has to do a double take. "What do you mean? You're my girl, like . . . girlfriend, you know?" Every second that passes only confuses the two of you more. "I'm your girlfriend?" "Ar-aren't you?" You blink at him. Were you? Are you? "Am I?" Somewhere there was cognitive dissonance, Jason just doesn't know for who. "Yeah, we're dating, I thought?" Though, he doesn't feel so confident about that now.

"Oh," You feel your ears grow warm, for the second time now your eyes don't meet his own. "I . . . I didn't know that." You wish you could hide right now, but he's still got his arms wrapped around you. "I mean, unless you don't want to, then-then I'm sorry-" Jason feels maybe even more embarrassed than you as he finally drops his arms, grabbing his helmet and moving to crawl back out the window he came in through. His bullet wound is completely forgotten by now.

He stops when you grip his jacket, shyly staring at the floor as you speak. "No! I w-want to." Your eyes darty up to his, before losing confidence and dropping back to the floor. "I want to be your girlfriend," It comes out a whisper, and when he's silent for a beat too long you worry he's suddenly changed his mind.

"Good. Great. Yeah." He drops back to the floor, sitting cross legged beside you. Internally, he's doing backflips in his mind. "Cool." Later on, he'll ask more questions, but for now, he's satisfied. "Yeah." You shyly play with your clothes, twiddling your thumbs as you sit in silence. You feel like a little girl who just admitted to her crush that she likes him. "Are you-" "I didn't-" You interrupt each other, both of you gesturing for the other to continue. It's a bit of a fight, but Jason makes you go first.

"I was gonna ask if you were hungry. I have some, um, pretzels and stuff. If you want." Jason nods. He follows you into your kitchen, where the two of you quietly and contently eat the iron rich foods you looked up. "What were you going to say, by the way?"

Jason looks up from his plate, the haphazardly prepared meal helping him feel better, though his heart feels pretty good right now anyways. "I didn't know that you didn't know. I thought," he laughs nervously. "I thought, we were dating this whole time." He laughs again when you shake your head. "I didn't know! I thought . . . I don't know, that I wasn't your type, or something."

That's probably the most surprising thing he's heard you say today. Okay it's not, but it's the thing that most catches him off guard.

"Of course you are! You're so sweet, and cute, and nice, and pretty, and you smell really good, and you're funny, and I like your voice, and the way you d-do things . . . and . . . other stuff." Jason stops himself before he can ramble for hours about every single things he loves about you. You wouldn't mind if he did, though. You hide your pleased expression with your hand.

"Me too." It's quiet, but no longer shy. "I like all that "stuff" about you too."

#bizbat #dc #jason todd x reader #jason todd headcanons #dc headcanon #red hood x reader #red hood #jason todd #dc x reader #lian harper #roy harper

556 notes · View notes

yrrtyrrtwhenihrrthrrt · 1 month ago

Text

Rewatching Season 1 of Arcane with my Season 2 knowledge and here's my commentary so far:

These children were giving SUCH Siblings. Not just Vi and Powder (although they were closer) but Claggor and Milo, whacking each other upside the head, bullying each other, protecting each other, being silly little kids. They deserved to all be brothers and sisters. They deserved to grow up together. I'm glad in the Alt Timeline it seems like Powder's relationship with her brothers really got stronger and they got to be a proper family, (with both Dadco and Dadnder to boot) it just sucks that Vi couldn't be a part of it :(

Viktor was kinda serving cunt with his finger tattoos and bracelets, although I found it interesting/weird that he had neither a limp nor his purple machine herald skin. I could see if being eaten by the magic and spat out fucking. Somewhere in the universe would return him to his original body, but then he should have had his limp, and if it didn't, he would have still had an augmented appearance. I get that he was likely from a different universe, but I think his disability is a part of him thematically and would be consistent across universes (at least ones where he would become a mage) idk. I guess including either feature would be an obvious giveaway for that spoiler, once Viktor and his limp were introduced, or once his hand turned purple towards the end of S1. And as powerful as he was, he probably could have conjured up a disguise so Jayce wouldn't be able to identify him later on, so it's a moot point ig just thought it was interesting

I forgot Silco had a bald cat. Probably because the bald cat is immediately killed. Take notes, anyone who is working on Domestic Vanco Everything Is Fine AU (me), they have a bald cat.

Silco is also much more sympathetic after having watched Season 2. Just knowing that if he had gotten Vander's apology, they would have worked on the nation of Zaun together again and created a truly beautiful thriving society like they always dreamed, like we see in S2 (which I strongly believe would not have been possible if not for Silco joining back up with Vander) is heartbreaking. He was a fucked up old twink but he really wanted to create something better.

Also it looks like Silco was injecting drugs into his eye even before shimmer was finalized??? Questionable. Was it not shimmer? Was it something else? Am I missing something? Whack. What this ALSO implies is that, well, we see in the alternate universe that his eye just looks like a normal injured/blind eye, but it's also implied that Alt. Universe events were largely the same up until Vi's heist went wrong. This means that Silco, in the AU, WAS shooting up dangerous untested drugs into his eyeball, and at some point, decided to stop after reuniting with Vander. Accepting his trauma, moving on from the pain? My Zaundads heart can't take it.

#arcane spoilers #Ive been writing comic Goldenheart for 2 years. A twink blind in one eye with facial scarring and a man he had a horrible falling out with?#ive been training for this #silco #vander #milo arcane #arcane claggor #powder arcane #vi arcane #zaundads #viktor arcane

93 notes · View notes

inchidentally · 10 days ago

Text

we all know Oscar speaks to media in carefully rehearsed and self-approved soundbites rather than risk impromptu vulnerability. which as a total side note is so fascinating bc he and Lando both call themselves over-thinkers but it manifests for Oscar in choosing to risk potentially being misconstrued as reserved or even cold/apathetic over giving the media/unkind public any part of his heart or soul to play with - whereas with Lando, he'd rather maintain the freedom of authenticity and then weather the brutal storms of being misunderstood - or accidentally misrepresenting himself. Oscar has no interest in becoming known as Himself, he just wants to be there in the racing history books with the people he's always admired and measured himself against. Lando wants to write his own story and have it be remembered by those who matter to him, Oscar wants to keep himself to himself and only focus on the parts of his career that matter to him and those close to him.

it's such a unique distinction between them and is equally laudable and authentic, but it's also so much a part of how they just Work So Well despite not taking a single one of the obvious easy methods to establish a friendship/bond or using any of the obvious easy ways to maintain it. (and even more notable bc unlike Lando with Carlos and Daniel where there was the age/life/hobbies difference and Lando had to adapt to the older guy's interest and friend groups, Lando and Oscar could've easily rolled with already sharing mutual friends, starting out in the same karting company, the same video games, same generation and references, and crucially Lando's best friend for life. the way they could have utilized all of that to push the great new bromance but didn't. that Max comfortably brings up Oscar on his stream so it's not like there's any issue there. it was a deliberate choice for them not to lean into something - at least publicly! - that the public would absolutely eat up.) like, they started from the mutual respect for what they're both trying to achieve in this sport and their own personal struggles and have built entirely off of that foundation. idk that fact and the way that get caught tilting their heads and smiling fondly at each other still just akjkkasfgagfagjflsagflj)

and like, Lando's deep pride in what they've built together as teammates and the history they are creating together and him finding his leadership and his strength in no longer being the kid, the little brother or the fanboy.

ANYWAY SORRY Oscar's soundbites are in no way fake or PR or advised by anyone else, it's that they're pre-rehearsed and parsed for anything a stranger could get their fangs into. he doesn't want any of his life with Lily out there for consumption so he lets her take the couple photos for his IG and he has his "my girlfriend would say/think/do" lines ready to go where they can be inserted and satisfy people wanting more of his romantic life. and the safety of Mark Webber as yes a supportive/father figure in his life but also a good source of harmless media humor. he has his "thanks to the fans and sponsors" "good to see all the fans out there" "my main focus is to improve my own performance" etc etc ready to go when talking about racing and what is owed to the people allowing him to have this rarified career. bc all of that is his Adult Life and happened after he became aware that gaining notoriety and sharing bits of his life would inevitably have it's very bad side. even tho he met Lily and Mark in his teens, his career and life trajectory were much closer to what his life is now than his life at say 14/15/16.

but he avoids or stumbles when talking about his own family, how he feels about the team in his garage who so closely represent people he doesn't want to disappoint, about Lando, about guys like Logan and Liam who he's spent significant parts of his childhood with, has only once mentioned Max F despite them being wrapped up in COVID protocol together and Max confirming that their relationships is still really good. the threads to childhood and a time when his privacy was never an issue are way too live and charged with those topics - to different degrees and different ways, but it's the same reason why he clams up and often doesn't have a handy soundbite ready.

WHERE I'M GOING WITH THIS holy shit I cannot fucking stop rambling - is that him constantly saying how Baku meant more to him than Hungary and that Hungary was about ticking a box but Baku was when he knew how it felt to truly win - is because sometimes the soundbites are for necessity and to avoid further probing. the sponsors, his romantic life tidbits, the way he's trying to improve himself - sometimes they're specifically so that he can offer up a pink, beating piece of his own heart to show to people while never putting it directly in their hands.

Lando, their relationship, their teammate dynamic, what they talk about, the emotions they feel about each other, what happens behind that shared doorway of theirs - all of that is Off Limits and even the soundbites are incredibly rare. (the tiny glimpse of their solidarity against DTS with the "no, I'm with my team" "fuck 'em" and the intensity of looking into each other's eyes while they mutually process things being both a little eerie but so <3 !!) equally he will NOT talk about how he loves or feels about his mum, dad and sisters or any feelings and the soundbites are even rarer.

there's something to be said about neurodivergence and the decisions over what feels intimate in a controlled, safe reliable way (Lily, his own race performances, Mark Webber, funnily enough now in a smaller way Carlos who he admires/gets uniquely annoyed by) and what feels intimate in a don't-have-full-control, tied to childhood emotions, kinda scary way (his family, Lando, the impact he has on his team/McLaren) and it not at ALL meaning that one is more or less or important than the other, just different - but that is wayyyyyy too overstepping even for me to go into/even be able to go into or theorize. it's just kinda... (wild gesturing) there.

but Lando, Hungary, Baku… those have dark, visceral blood running through them. those things slot directly, terrifyingly into his hidden most intimate childhood feelings about dreams, ambitions, sacrifices, passions, insecurities, pains and joys etc (Andrea kissing both their heads lovingly?? feels so indicative and expressive on it's own of what was going on). Lando as a person and a driver pushing so fully into Oscar's attention and his ambition from literally age 13/14 - and not in the usual pre-F1 likes/comments that we as fans knowingly blow up into something deeper than it is - but in a oh wow he truly notched Lando into his own personal measure of ambition and also just found him fascinating/cool in a way he didn't do with any other driver! and it remained fully consistent up until he had Lando in his day-to-day life and didn't need to follow him any other way anymore! but it's unchanged from telling his mum he won't have to face such harsh expectations his first season bc Lando is so good to just recently saying he's proud to have The Best as his teammate to measure against. that's just !!! that's perilously close to an open heart!!

so when he cultivates soundbites for these things to present to the media/public, it's far from him dulling them down or acting dispassionate: in that case he could choose to just cultivate a white lie or a bland enough fib to get people off his back. it's actually because he so badly wants the world to know that he /knows/ Hungary was a mess and that neither he nor Lando ever had a hope of not being as vilified by one side as they were angrily defended by the other. that the relief of Baku that was evident in BOTH of them is something Real To Him. he will NOT say he didn't earn Hungary and he will NOT say that he ever would have expected Lando to be okay with giving back the lead bc neither of those things has ever been a question for him. but he very much does want people to see him authentically and feel the warmth behind the words when he says that Baku is for him The Win he wants to talk about and it's for the reasons we can easily assume. that if he speaks any more plainly than the soundbite then Lando's fans could rip into it or his own fans could rip into Lando over it or F1 fans could start claiming he's a cold blooded winner OR a teammate simp who doesn't have the killer instinct needed.

no, he won't hand that over to the media or the masses. he'll give a private little smile, add a warm, soft knowing lilt to his voice and return to Baku 2024 as the moment when his childhood earnestness hugged his adult ambition and that Lando and the Team and Andrea and his family are all tied up in that in ways that anyone with basic empathy can imagine. if someone needs it spelled out, if they are too biased or too dense or too emotionally undeveloped to learn human beings based on anything except dumb, deliberate invasiveness then they're precisely the people he's intending to keep at the gate. (*because it's precisely those people who have also latched their teeth onto Lando's vulnerability, claiming to be his biggest fans, storming around the internet and comments sections speaking for him and about him with an authority they never earned and being just as misguided and wrong as the people who only want to hate him)

idk just, every time he talks about Baku and gets that sweet smile on his face and I remember Lando striding around with sweet freedom filling his lungs and leaping up to shower Oscar in champagne at the group photo and the utter giddiness shared in having that awful shadow's chill off of them… like, it means SO much to him <3<3

#inchidentallyanessay #opes and rayers that all the links work bc my eyes were getting so bleary by the end of editing them in lafgsajlfg

95 notes · View notes

indigosaffron · 1 month ago

Text

Caitvi being endgame was the thing that ruined season 2.

I don't mean that in a homophobic way - I am literally a lesbian and in the first season, I rly liked Caitvi's dynamic. Vi was given a space to heal and a person who helped and cared for her. She didn't need to protect and lead Caitlyn like she did with Jinx, Mylo and Claggor, and as a result we got to see her heal and be vulnerable as she didn't have to be strong for the people she loved. Caitlyn, on the other hand, had grown up sheltered and privileged, and her relationship with Vi allowed her to see the people of Zaun more clearly and encouraged her to help them and set aside her prejudice. This dynamic was also reflected in how the show portrayed the people of Zaun. In the first season, it's very pro-Zaun, pro-revolutionary, anti-fascism, all that.

And then the second season, Caitlyn pulled a complete 180, started acting like a fascist and hating the people of Zaun, and in the end... Vi forgives her.

Is this in character for both of them? Yes, actually. Caitlyn has grown up sheltered and was raised to look down on the people of Zaun, it's very easy for her to just turn back to that way of thinking. Vi is also incredibly dependent and forgiving when it comes to those she loves. We see how hard it is for her to let go of anyone - Vander and Powder are obvious examples. So it isn't strange that she doesn't leave Caitlyn and forgives her in an instant.

Would it have been so much more interesting if Vi didn't forgive her? Yes. A million times yes. I would've loved to see that character growth for Vi, of her establishing that boundary and deciding that she had to leave Caitlyn behind. I'm honestly kind of mad that they gave Jinx so much development and growth throughout the story and Vi has barely changed. Her political beliefs seems to be the biggest thing that has changed, and even those are rooted in the same character traits - first she was fighting for powder, now she's fighting for Caitlyn.

It's not just that I'm mad that they never address how toxic this relationship becomes in season 2. I saw someone else mention how it went from "privileged + oppressed" in s1 to "oppressor + oppressed" in s2 and if that doesn't just sound like literal abuse to you idk what to say. They frame this in the show as a normal relationship - at best, it's both of their faults and their both in a bad place mentally. They never address how horrible Caitlyn acts throughout act 1.

As a result of this, they kind of lose the whole "Piltover is an oppressive force and the people of Zaun should revolt" plot line. Instead it becomes "both sides are bad and in the wrong", just like with Caitvi's relationship. After all, the show can't properly condemn Piltover and yet support Caitlyn at the same time. And if they want Caitlyn and Vi together in a relationship that looks healthy, they have two options - either they address the flaws in the relationship and take the time required to fix them, or they ignore the flaws and pretend it's not a big deal.

They don't have the time in 2 seasons to address those flaws, though, so they decide to ignore them, and in doing so ignore the flaws in Piltover's overall treatment of Zaunites. This creates a contradicting message between the first and second seasons. In the first season, it was obvious that the Zaunites were being mistreated and that they should rise up. In the second season, they suddenly ignore all of that, and instead make the nations unite to face the "bigger problem". I didn't really like the hex tech plot line to begin with because I felt like it distracted from the more important plot line, which was the whole Piltover v Zaun thing, which they completely brushed under the rug.

Maybe this would've been better if they'd had more time to properly flesh out Caitvi's relationship, but as it is, it would've been better if it wasn't endgame at all imo.

#arcane #anti caitvi #anti caitlyn kiramman

88 notes · View notes

restinslices · 11 months ago

Note

How do you think earth realm boys would be like around their crush?

Haven’t made moodboards for them so this is all I got rn

Johnny Cage

He would be incredibly shy

^ That's something I would say if I lost it

Am I suffering from lack of sleep? Yes. Have I lost the plot? No.

Johnny is a huge flirt. He was flirting with Kitana and he hardly knew her

And I'm pretty sure a lot of his MK1 intros is just him flirting or being a little shit

So with that being said it’s obvious to everyone

It’s obvious at least that he finds you attractive. The problem would be trying to figure out whether he’s just being Johnny or if he actually likes you

Which would be difficult

He flirts, he makes sly jokes, he says how much you should be with him and that he could totally handle you, how great you’d be together and a whole bunch of other shit

Like I said though, the main problem would be knowing if he’s joking or not

But I think if you simply asked “dude, are you joking?” He’d say “no” immediately

But Johnny’s eyes tend to wander so you wouldn’t be wrong for being hesitant

It’d be dogshit if you were just his distraction for the month

You’d know he’s serious though because he keeps going for months

Obviously you’ve encountered other attractive people but he doesn’t seem to care about them and his eyes are always on you

A model could walk by and he’d be too busy pulling your chair to notice

That’s how you’d know he’s serious. It’s been months and he’s still focused on you?

Whether or not you share those same feelings is a different story

Kenshi Takahashi

Probably one of the hardest to tell

Idk if this is a headcanon I made up or if it’s canon but I feel like Kenshi is good at hiding certain emotions

If it’s an emotional moment then yeah, it could slip but this is something more casual

He wouldn’t say anything but he’d do things for you

You’d mention you haven’t had time to cook because you’ve been busy and he’d offer to help with whatever

He’d ask your opinion on stuff first as well

As friends he makes sure you’re included but it’s even more so if he has a crush (this is not correct English but I cannot think of how else to put this)

One of the other guys would make some joke about him being in love and he’d look at them in a way that would let them know they were right

Kenshi is not 10 so trying to blackmail him won’t work

His eyes are always on you and even though he knows he shouldn’t be jealous of other people that are close to you, he can’t help it

There’s two voices in his head. One says “just tell them”, the other says “you’re gonna mess up your friendship”

So he’d continue to be a little butler lowkey until he actually felt like he had to get a move on

If someone showed genuine romantic interest in you, then he’d start moving

He’s either gonna be stereotypically sweet and get flowers and shit or he’s just gonna ask you out at a random time

Like I said, whether or not you accept his invitation is up to you

Dude is probably tense as fuck the entire time he’s asking

Kung Lao

Similar to Johnny

Kung Lao has such an inflated sense of self, you not liking him makes no sense to him

Does that mean he just tells you right away though? No

There’s lots of things that make no sense and happen anyway so he plays it safe

And by safe I mean he is incredibly obvious but doesn’t just straight up tell you

Lots of flirting and lingering looks

He does a lot of extra shit then looks to see if you saw it

It’s like when a kid does a cartwheel then looks to make sure their parents saw them

He also straight up asks for compliments

“That was a really good kick, right?”

Sure Kung Lao

He likes compliments way better from you now

He kinda acts the same because everyone knows he has a big head but the flirting makes it obvious

And Raiden definitely knows. Kung Lao told him because why wouldn’t he?

Anyone joking about stealing you away bothers him a lot more than he’d like to admit

He’s both “I’m Kung Lao. You have no chance” and “but what if they do have a chance?”

Admits his feelings way sooner than Kenshi

Probably does it extremely casual too just to rip the bandaid off

You’re standing next to each other and he’s like “we should go on a date on Friday”

Well since you asked so nicely-

Who’s turning down Kung Lao? Let’s be fr for a second

Raiden

Doesn’t he like Kitana and it was incredibly subtle? I only found out because of intros

So with that being said, I think it would be difficult to tell

He’d act the same way he does as your friend

I think his fear of messing up your friendship would be higher than everyone else

So he doesn’t say anything

In a different post I said he’d give you produce as a gift and I think that’s still the same here

He’s gonna still have the hookup so food is a frequent gift he gives you to show his affection

He also offers to do tasks for you

When it comes to training, he’s probably noticeably softer towards you

His excuse is “oh, I didn’t notice I was doing that”

It’s a terrible lie

Everyone at some point finds out because he’s constantly staring at you and is soft towards you

Raiden is a pretty calm person but he’d actually strangle Kung Lao if he said anything. He’d get a toddler’s grip

You’d probably find out about it from the other guys instead of him

And you’d think they’re just fucking around like they always do

Raiden still refuses to confess. He doesn’t wanna confess then lose you completely

And tbh he’d probably take so long, you’d get into other relationships and he’d just watch

Finally though after 279373 years he’d confess which would free him from his emotions and Kung Lao harassing him

Liu Kang

I think there’d be two stages to this

The first stage is “I’ll just ignore it”

During this stage he’ll try to ignore his feelings for you because bullshit comes after Liu Kang constantly and dragging you into that is something he definitely doesn’t wanna do

There’s a good chance you were in the previous timeline and you died horribly so he wants to stay away so he doesn’t fuck up this new life for you

During this time he’d compliment you on your skills and be a lot more patient with you when it comes to you screwing up (which is something everyone does)

He either involves you in a lot of missions of sidelines you so you won’t be hurt

Which is kinda shitty because that means he’s sending other people into dangerous situations

Soon after this stage, he enters the second stage

This stage is the “fuck it” stage

Liu Kang does not have a good history when it comes to romance

He was way too slow and lost Kitana (multiple times I think. I don’t remember what happened in the dlc in MK11) and now in this timeline, Kitana has no memory of them and has no feelings for him. Then he saw his Kitana but they can’t be together.

Because of this he realizes that he has to start moving quicker and prioritizing his happiness

So he just asks

It’s better to hear “no” than to always wonder what could’ve been

But bitch who is turning down Liu Kang? Don’t be stupid

He’d probably take you to a secluded spot and say how he feels and ask you to go on a date with him

It seems like it came out of nowhere but if you review what’s happened between you two, it’ll start to make sense

313 notes · View notes

jjscrybaby · 20 days ago

Text

𝑻𝑹𝑨𝑪𝑲 𝑭𝑶𝑼𝑹 💿 — 𝒕𝒘𝒐 𝒈𝒉𝒐𝒔𝒕𝒔

masterlist.

steve harrington x fem!reader | angst/fluff | (a lot of reader x the other characters cause i’m a sucker for found family, i got way too into it and added full on lore so sort of messed up family warning, ptsd. shitty ending cause it was getting a bit long and i wanted to write something else lol.)

writing this made me want to write a full fic about it, but idk if anyone would be interested in that. let me know if you’d want to see something like it! it wouldn’t be exactly the same, obviously, but along the same lines.

︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶

Hawkins doesn’t look much different from when you left. The trees are caked in snow, the grass is all dead and icy, the buildings are locked up tight for the night with extra locks because no one ever truly feels safe anymore. You remember, back when you were young, your mom wouldn’t even lock the front door sometimes; it would be dangerous if you lived elsewhere, but Hawkins was known for it’s safety and lack of thugs and thieves.

Your eyes travelled over the empty streets as you drove, nausea sitting uncomfortably in your gut. It had been two years since you last stepped foot in your home-town, and yet everything feels exactly the same.

The house that sat in front of you was decorated head to toe in decorations, lights hanging on the roof and a blow-up snowman on the lawn. Hopper and Joyce loved going all out for their two teens, El never got to experience Christmas before a few years ago and Will deserves to have new memories of Christmas time. You climbed out your car and the front door was pulled open, Jonathon stepped out.

“There she is!” He beamed, stepping towards you with open arms. You grinned, wrapping your own arms around him excitedly.

“Long time no see,” you smiled, pulling away. The nausea settled now that you were seeing a familiar face.

“You’re two hours late, got scared you weren’t coming… again,” Jonathon stated, moving to open your trunk and get your bags for you. You sighed, tucking your hair behind your ear.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m an asshole. I know,” you replied, a self-pitying smile on your face.

He shook his head, closing your trunk and carrying your suitcase under one arm. He ruffled your hair as he walked past and back inside the house, you following close behind. “No one thinks you’re an asshole. We just miss you around here.”

Before you could respond, you were getting bombarded by a girl who has definitely grown over the last two years. El’s arms wrapped around your waist, smiling up at you. “You’re here!”

“Hey,” you greet enthusiastically. She’d learnt a lot over the last couple years, you could tell from the monthly calls you have, but you didn’t think she fully understood why you hadn’t come back to visit yet — she may be the only one.

“Your hairs different,” she stated, tugging on the ends of your hair. You just laughed as Hopper, Joyce and Will also appeared in the hallway.

“Hi, honey,” Joyce said warmly, hugging you.

Hopper was next, kissing the top of your head; he’d definitely softened since the last battle. Will had grown the most, towering over you now as he wrapped his arms around you.

“Look at you,” you laughed. “Not 4’11 anymore, huh?”

“Shut up,” he grumbled, smiling sheepishly.

“How was the drive?” Joyce asked, arm wrapping around your waist as she lead you through the foreign house and into the kitchen.

They’d moved in here just after the final battle, but you’d also left at the same time. You’d seen pictures from El mailing them to you, but you’d never actually seen it with your own eyes. It was homely, comforting, a lot like the old Byers’ house. You were happy they’d made the decision to move back to Hawkins rather than go back to California, it was obvious no one was enjoying it there and Hopper didn’t want to leave.

“Exhausting,” you sighed, leaning against the counter as Joyce turned on the kettle.

“Well, we’re happy you’re here,” Hopper smiled. “It means those two can finally stop pacing the house.” He pointed to El and Will.

“We weren’t,” El argued, shaking her head.

“Not sure how your feet aren’t aching by now,” Hopper teased, making her stick her tongue out at him.

You smiled softly at the exchange. You could remember when you all thought he was dead, the effect it had on Eleven. It had broken your heart, for more reasons than one. Growing up, you’d spent countless hours in his office at the station; petty theft, underage drinking, cps calls. He became somewhat of a dad to you too, and yet you still left him behind.

“I missed you guys, too,” you smirk, ruffling both the teens hair. They groaned, pushing you away as if you were an overbearing mother.

“I think they all missed you. Robin and Dustin spent an entire week trying to talk their way into being here when you arrived, but we figured you’d be tired and those two are the last people you want to see when you’re tired,” Joyce explained.

Robin and Dustin, two of the ones you missed the most, but not the one. Seeing them would just remind you of him, although you were well aware you’d be seeing him as well. You’d been so close to cancelling, making up an excuse about having to work Christmas Day and promising to see them in the New year, but you did that last year. You felt guilty, and deep down you didn’t want to spend Christmas alone in your dingy apartment in a city you hate.

“I’ve put your bags in the guest room,” Jonathon said, walking into the kitchen just as Joyce started to pour cups of tea.

“The guest room? Damn, this place is fancy,” you joked.

“Technically it’s meant to be El’s room, but she spends most nights on a mattress on Will’s floor,” Hopper explained with a pointed look at his daughter. You couldn’t blame her, she’d grown up completely alone; it was about time she had people around her.

You sat around and drank tea in the living room, a Christmas movie playing as white noise in the background as you chatted about your life now, and theirs. You heard all about school for the teens, about Jonathon’s new job and him and Nancy thinking of getting their own place, about Hopper and Joyce’s wedding plans. That was another thing you’d have to visit for, but at least there would be more people; easier to hide in the shadows.

When you crawled into bed, pyjamas on and eye bags heavy, the door creaked open. Joyce stood there, coming to sit on the edge of the bed when you gave her a warm, sleepy smile.

“How are you feeling about tomorrow?” She asked quietly, incase anyone was listening in.

Tomorrow. Christmas Eve. The day you’ll have to see everyone again, the day you’ll have to see him.

“I’m feeling okay. I’m excited to see everyone,” you murmured back.

“You know we’re all here for you? If you need a break or anything…” she trailed off, but you knew what she meant.

“Thankyou, Joyce. And thankyou for letting me stay here. Robin offered, but I didn’t really want to stay with her and… y’know,” you explained softly.

“No worries, we’re happy to have you. We’d keep you forever if we could,” she joked, making you laugh tiredly. “Go on, get some rest. El will be waking you up nice and early, she’s been practicing making breakfast.”

“God help us,” you muttered, making her laugh. “Night, Joyce.”

“Night, sweetheart.”

︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶

As you’d been warned, El woke you up just past eight am to cook breakfast together. You’d all sat down and eaten the eggs and bacon, talking about the plans for the day. Today was supposed to be more chill, just meant for reuniting and getting more into the Christmas spirit. It was tomorrow, Christmas Day, when things would become more intense.

You showered and dressed, putting on some jeans and a white, long-sleeved top. When you went down the stairs, Nancy was already here. She gave you a welcoming hug. The two of you were never that close, but when you’ve fought literal demons together you become family.

Next was Mike, who gave you a hug and then an insult just to not cringe himself out. Then came Lucas and Max, her walking had improved by far; she barely had to use the crutches anymore. When the next knock on the door came, you held your breath. Joyce pulled it open and Dustin and Robin stood there, barging past her to get to you. You laughed as they tackled you in hugs, telling you how mean you were for not visiting more recently. When you looked up though, the smile dropped off your face. There he stood, holding a homemade pie with a stupid Christmas jumper on as he said hello to Joyce.

For a moment, time stood still. You were 17 again, utterly in love with Steve Harrington. He was just as in love with you, the two of you sat three years ago watching Christmas movies and feeding each other cookies after you’d cried in his arms over all the people you’d lost. Joyce and the kids had been in California, Max had been pretending you all didn’t exist as Lucas tried to get her to let him in, everything had sucked. It had sucked a little less with him by your side, though. You’d at least had a shoulder to cry on.

“Hi,” he murmured, a gentle smile on his lips as he stepped towards you. Joyce had taken the pie, that meant his arms were free. Were you supposed to hug him? Shake hands? How did you greet your former soulmate?

“Hi,” you echoed, just as softly as him. Eyes were on the two of you, everyone waiting to see what you would do; you felt just as lost as them.

He made the decision, strong arms wrapping around your waist in a fleeting hug. His cologne filled your nose, the same one he’d been wearing since he was fifteen. He pulled away, hands lingering just under your shirt as he stared down at you.

The breakup wasn’t his decision, which was why you’d been so anxious to see him. What if he hated you for how you left things? One second you were planning on moving in together, and the next you were telling him you couldn’t do this anymore and fleeing across the country. You hadn’t even heard his voice since that night.

“You look good,” he complimented, taking in your appearance.

“You too,” you smiled. He looked different, yet the same. His hair still perfect and eyes still warm. There was an exhaustion behind them, one that all of you shared. He was freshly shaved, very clean looking. He always had been, though. With his parents being so pristine, he had to be. You were the lucky one that got to see him before he was ready for the day, messy hair and sweats on. You always thought he looked perfect.

“Let’s go sit,” Joyce decided, noticing the slight awkwardness between the pair of you.

The large group of you moved to the living room, all squeezing in. Hopper sat in his armchair, the one you were positive used to sit in the cabin, with El on the arm of it. Joyce, Nancy and Jonathon on one couch, the kids young adults all on the floor and you, Robin and Steve on the other couch. Robin took the middle, thank god, you’d shoved yourself into the corner before she could force you into sitting next to him.

She wanted the two of you back together more than anyone, every time she called she’d bring him up; it was a ploy to force you into thinking about him. She didn’t understand why you left, why you ended things with him. She never blamed you, of course she didn’t, but you knew that sometimes she wanted to just scream down the phone at you for answers as to why you broke her best friend’s heart.

“It’s so weird to have you back here, good weird obviously, but weird,” Robin babbled, arm around your shoulders.

“Yeah, it’s weird for me too,” you laughed softly, looking around the living room.

There was a wall of pictures that you hadn’t noticed last night, ones of the family and also the rest of you. You featured in a few, and it made you smile. Even with you not living here, not seeing them in two years, they’d put you up there. One of the photos caught your eye, it was from before the Snowball dance, you, El and Steve from when he’d dropped you to the cabin to do her makeup. She had her dress on, and Hopper had wanted to snap a picture. Steve was stood behind you, looking down at you with a loving smile as you kissed El’s cheek. That same picture was on your wall in your apartment, the only thing that makes it feel like home.

You look back towards Robin, eyes meeting Steve’s. He just stares, it’s like now than no one’s watching the two of you his facade of being perfectly fine is gone. He’s staring at you like he wishes you were someone else, or wishes you weren’t there at all. You don’t blame him, you feel the same way.

“How’s Chicago?” Steve asked, but from the tone you could tell he didn’t really want to know — or he wanted you to tell him how terrible it is.

It was terrible, you hated it. You had a shitty job as a waitress in a diner by your apartment, your neighbour was a creepy old man who kept inviting you in for a chat and you had no friends. You felt completely alone, but the horrors that Hawkins held were just too much for you to deal with.

“It’s okay,” you replied quietly, nibbling on your red-painted nails.

“Great,” he replied sarcastically. You carried on smiling, it was strained and awkward but you didn’t want to make things even more uncomfortable by starting to cry.

The next few hours were a blur, catching up with your friends (mainly the ones four years younger than you) and helping Joyce make dinner just to get away from the conversation you knew you needed to have. He deserved closure, an explanation, but you weren’t ready to give it. You weren’t ready to open up.

“How are you doing?” The question caught you off guard, eyes going wide as you turned to look at Hopper. You were pouring yourself your third glass of wine, finally able to legally drink in front of the sheriff. “With the holidays, I mean. I know you’ve never really enjoyed them.”

“I’m okay,” you replied, sipping from your glass.

He didn’t believe you, the way his eyebrow raised told you that. “You know, you’ve always got a place here. I don’t know how Chicago is, you never really talk about it, but if you ever want to come home then you have a place to stay.”

“Thanks, Hop,” you murmured, tears welling up in your eyes as you gave him a soft smile. “I just— I think me coming back would be too weird.”

“You can’t not come back because you’re afraid it would be weird, if you want to be here then you have every right. This is your home, kid. Doesn’t matter what you left behind,” he argued firmly.

You spent the rest of the night going over his words. Was he right? He’d left once too, but that wasn’t by his own accord, everyone was thrilled to have him back. It wasn’t the same. You knew if you truly decided to move back to Hawkins you’d have to have that difficult conversation, and you’d have to deal with seeing Steve more than once every couple years. You didn’t even know anything about him anymore — was pizza still his favourite food, did he still hate horror movies, did he have a girlfriend? You hadn’t even thought about him moving on, but there was a possibility, you didn’t think he’d wait around for you forever.

It got to midnight and everyone was still there, you didn’t realise you were having some sort of group sleepover. Joyce and Hopper headed to bed, telling you all to behave, next was El and Max who headed to Will’s room. Lucas, Dustin and Mike were sharing the pull-out couches and Jonathon and Nancy were in his room. That left just you, Steve and Robin. What you should have expected was for Robin to fall asleep on the last couch, the place where Steve was supposed to sleep.

“Well, great,” Steve muttered, looking around. He tried to shake Robin, but she had one too many margaritas; she was out cold. “Guess I’m sleeping in the bathtub.”

“Don’t be stupid,” you sighed. You didn’t want to share your bed with Steve, but you didn’t feel like you had much of a choice. You couldn’t leave him to sleep on the floor, or the bath, in the middle of December. “Just come on.”

“What?” He looked over at you in confusion, before realisation hit him. “Uh…”

“Don’t be a child, Steve. You haven’t got any other options,” you argued, walking away from him to head up the stairs.

He followed you, walking into the bedroom behind you. You both looked at each other awkwardly, moving around to get changed and ready for bed. When you crawled into bed you felt your heart race pick up, the bed dipping beside you as he laid next to you silently.

Minutes ticked by, you thought maybe he’d fallen asleep from the soft sounds of his breathing that filled the room, but then he spoke up. “You didn’t even say goodbye.”

“What?” You whispered back, throat growing dry.

“When you left, you didn’t say goodbye. I had to find out that you were gone from Robin. I know we weren’t together anymore but… I thought I deserved a goodbye, at least,” he muttered.

“You did,” you murmured after a moment of silence. You felt him shift, turning to look at you. “But I was afraid.”

“Of what?”

“Of seeing you, I thought if I told you what I was planning you’d manage to talk me out of it,” you explained quietly, squeezing your eyes closed as they filled with tears.

“Was that possible?” He asked.

You nodded your head, wiping a stray tear that rolled down your cheek. “Everything sucked, it still does, but… at the time… it was just—” you trailed off, a sob catching in your throat.

“We don’t gotta do this right now,” he reassured, concern filling his voice. He turned his body fully towards you, moving closer.

“Yeah, we do,” you argued. You were a little tipsy, you were in the dark and there was no way of escaping him. This was the perfect time. “After everything with my parents, I was terrified of losing people. It was like, my biggest fear. Then everything happened with Vecna, and for four years I had to lose countless people. I had to worry constantly that I was going to lose you.”

“You never—”

“Just let me finish,” you pleaded, voice full of pain. “After the final battle, after I nearly lost you and everyone, I was still terrified that it wasn’t over. I was having constant nightmares, seeing things, it was literally torture. I had to get away, and apart of that was leaving you.”

“Why didn’t you just talk to me about this?” He asked softly, hand reaching towards you but hesitating at the last second.

“Because, Steve. You were doing so well, you were so happy. I didn’t want to drag you down with me,” you sobbed

“You wouldn’t have been,” he argued calmly, finally taking your hand in his to squeeze tightly. “You were the love of my life, you understand that? I could’ve helped. I— I still could.”

You looked up at him, lip wobbling. “You still could?”

“I love you. Always have always will. You don’t like it in Chicago, I know you don’t. Robin tells me how miserable you sound, and from seeing you today I agree with her. You’re not happy, but you could be,” he explained, leaning forward so your faces were only a couple inches apart.

“Even after everything I did?” You asked shakily.

He smiled softly at you in the darkness, moving further forward until his lips were brushing against yours. When you didn’t push him away, he leant in fully and his lips connected to yours. Your tears continued to run down your cheeks, but now they didn’t feel quite so sad.

“That answer your question?” He murmured against your lips, making you giggle quietly. You nodded your head and he grinned back. He looked over you at the clock that rested on the bedside table, his grin growing at the time. “Merry Christmas, beautiful.”

“Merry Christmas, Stevie,” you smiled, kissing him once again.

Chicago wasn’t for you. Hawkins would always be where you’d end up — because of the people that had been waiting there for you.

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #stranger things #i hate this actually #my attention span is nonexistent

80 notes · View notes

corviiids · 3 months ago

Note

ooh idk if you've talked about this one before, but what about goro akechi for the kira game?

HI RAPS

verdict: im prepared for this to be controversial, but consider this: ive never been wrong in my whole life. i think goro akechi could beat kira, but i don't know if he'd be happy with the outcome.

could goro akechi identify light yagami

im answering this one first because i want to make a point about this. listen. i feel like due to akechi's whole Plot where he Fakes Solving Cases For Clout, people forget that he actually is a really smart person and a good detective. like, he's not the super prodigy genius he pretends to be, but he's not a fake detective. he faked solving those shutdown cases for extremely specific reasons:

he was the fucking perpetrator so it served him to take control of the public understanding of the investigation into them and control the narrative; and

those cases were particularly high profile and would have been impossible to solve by anyone else, so 'solving' them would catapult him into notoriety faster than anything else - it was a clout speedrun, which is what he and shido needed.

but there are numerous other cases and puzzles in various bits of p5 media that he solves without faking them, plus we see plenty of occasions where he demonstrates his high intellect. the casino is a great example because i feel like the game takes that palace as an opportunity and relishes in letting you know what akechi can really do. the anime and the mementos mission manga both have subplots where akechi solves / helps to solve legitimate mysteries. and of course the famed unused mementos request in p5r which i think about all the time. it's kind of a shame that akechi's fake cases end up overshadowing all his real ones when he's a legitimately competent detective, even if he's not the impossible prodigy he projects as and even if he's nowhere near the level L is.

of course there's also the obvious one! while we are all aware that the phantom thieves are the least subtle people on the planet, and all ren's confidants eventually work it out just because he's so deeply unsubtle about it, it is still the case akechi identified them as persons of interest very early on, before pretty much anyone else (partly by intellect, partly by his metaverse advantage, i'll get to that). that's relevant because i think the phantom thieves are reasonably analogous to kira in the sense that they're utilising supernatural methods to target individuals which are untraceable via ordinary means.

now i dont think akechi could identify kira nearly as quickly or cleanly as L could, but i do think that if you placed him in charge of the investigation with all the investigative resources of the prosecutor's office / police department, he would be able to identify light as at least a person of interest in a reasonable amount of time, for two main reasons

light is more sneaky than the phantom thieves, but also makes the same kinds of identifiable mistakes that the PT do (eg targeting people in a set area, operating in such a way that it's possible to identify him as a student, being easily provoked, etc); and

unlike L, akechi has supernatural powers.

which brings me to:

could goro akechi intuit the mechanics of the death note

no, i don't think so, not on his own. but he wouldn't need to, because he has access to the metaverse.

we're back at the universe question. i think to fairly answer 'could they beat kira' questions we have to give our detective character all the advantages they have access to in their home universe, which means that akechi not only has his intellect but also has the metaverse, his persona, and his experience traversing the collective unconscious. (by the way, here's my post about what if light yagami had a palace.)

which means that once goro akechi has identified light as a person of interest, not even needing to ID him as a particular suspect, he can check whether the metanav gives him a hit. then he could infiltrate light's palace / find him in mementos (let's be real it's gonna be a palace) and find out the rest of what he needs to know from there. the metaverse isn't only useful for changing hearts and causing shutdowns. shadows are very forthcoming about their evil plans. all akechi would need to do is find light's shadow, and he'd find out everything he needs to know about the death note and kira's new world.

(follow-up question for fun: if akechi didn't have the metaverse, would he be able to intuit the mechanics of the death note? i think that akechi would ultimately get to the same point as L, namely, that kira needs a name and a face, but the specifics of 'magic murder notebook' would escape him. so no.)

could goro akechi survive

i think this would really depend on the context in which this investigation is taking place, but broadly i think it's likely? not certain, but it's likely. it depends on how reactive light is and depends on how well akechi reads the kira situation early on.

akechi is pretty shrewd, with the exception of major blindspots where someone he has a grudge against is concerned (hence why he's vulnerable to shido and to ren's plots). but i think kira is dangerous enough that akechi would be on pretty high alert from the start. in canon he's cunning enough to make false statements to the media to trick the thieves into thinking he's at least partially on their side / not an unambiguous enemy (that's the same strategy used in romance ha ha ha) so i think once akechi identified a person of interest he wouldn't be stupid enough to publicise that he's closing in on them and would probably start leaking false theories to make light think he's completely off the trail - after all, unlike L, akechi's name and face are completely public, so it would be way too risky to make light feel cornered. it would be smartest to play up the shallow celebrity angle to make think light he's just a dumbass idiot talking a big game.

i think akechi would bank on kira's MO of only killing criminals. after all, light didn't try to kill L until L deliberately goaded him into it - it's unlikely that akechi would have a reason to think that light would try to kill him just for investigating. up until that point kira has been masquerading as an icon of justice, so it would (and canonically did) take a lot to make kira veer from that ideology into killing investigators just because they threatened him. however, it's not impossible given nobody really knows anything about kira at that stage, so while akechi might make it public information that he's investigating kira, he wouldn't let on that he thought light was a threat.

then he could either:

initiate a surprise raid on light to get the death note based on information gained from light's shadow - risky because if it goes wrong light will kill him, but this will net him the most glory

(pre-phantom thieves) kill light - stops the murders but means akechi doesn't get clout for solving the kira murders single-handedly, not preferable

(post-phantom thieves) change light's heart - akechi also doesn't get credit and would be reluctant besides

so it depends how we're defining success i guess. could akechi beat light by killing light? likely yes, by simply causing a shutdown before putting light on notice that akechi was on his trail at all. could akechi beat light by apprehending light? maybe, it depends, it's risky. could akechi beat light by changing his heart? only if the thieves are involved.

so i guess the answer is yes i think akechi has the capacity to beat kira but probably not in a way that akechi himself is satisfied with and it wouldn't be a sure thing. it could go either way.

#long post #but actually! not as long as it could have been considering you asked me about goro akechi vs light yagami #which you'd think given it's them and it's me i could go on about forever #but instead. i only went on about it for mostly forever #asks #anyway thanks rapsodia this was very self indulgent for me #could they beat kira the game #poof if you're seeing this i didnt forget about our project i swear

135 notes · View notes

themultifanshipper · 9 months ago

Text

George knew he was fucked.

Well, preferably he was going to be doing the fucking.

Warnings: being disgusting in public, infidelity? Kinda fluffy? Idk

George spotted you from across the paddock on media day. You were new on the media team but you were already proving to be a force to be reckoned with. Didn't take anyone's bullshit, didn't ask mundane, stupid questions that made the drivers internally cringe. You were smart, that much was obvious the first time meeting you, and it didn't take long for the drivers to warm to you, especially George.

He was instantly drawn to you and always went out of his way to talk to you first, guaranteeing he'd be in a good mood for the rest of the day.

Then he spotted you from across the dance floor after the last race of the season, at some overpriced privatised club everyone was invited to celebrate at.

You were wearing a strapless thing that showed off your figure, perhaps more than was appropriate, but it was certainly effective in making sure you caught his eye constantly, only leaving the dance floor periodically to get drinks.

Every time you walked past him he would catch your eye and you would exchange winks and conspiratorial grins.

That night, he decided he needed you. He walked over and you danced awkwardly for a while, in true George fashion, but the songs got slower and it quickly turned into dirty whispers and roaming hands.

If you asked anyone else, your behaviour would be qualified as indecent, and even Lando, the expert on public indecency, told you to "maybe cool it a bit". But George's thigh between your legs made it hard to think straight and soon enough the two of you needed your clothes off.

You inevitably ended up in his hotel room and he picked you apart, learning the ins and outs of your body.

He made you writhe, gasp, shiver and moan in pitches you didn't know you could manage, and you knew you were screwed. Ruined for anyone else.

That was the first time. And you both knew it wouldn't be the last. His house, his drivers room, various private jets, clubs, hotels all around the world, Charles' yacht (that was a night to remember, Charles' scream still ringing out in the collective memory).

You were convinced Carmen knew about it. How could she not? The two of you were inseperable, fucking like rabbits all over the place. It was clear to anyone who knew the two of you that you were made for each other.

But as it turned out Carmen didn't care at all, only interested in sponsors and her carefully curated PR image that made her rich. So the only reputation their breakup could hurt was George's.

And it didn't really hurt it, let's be honest. Famous, popular Mercedes formula 1 driver George Russell could pick whoever the fuck he wanted, and that was you.

You celebrated with champagne and a very drunken, very public wedding in Vegas at the Grand Prix, which just happened to be the next weekend...

It was quite the blowout. All the drivers showed up, showering you in champagne which almost made you cry with how symbolic it was of their acceptance of you into the F1 family.

But it didn't take long for you and George to dissappear into the night together, stumbling along, giggling away as you made your way slowly up to your hotel room.

He undressed you carefully, worshipping your body like it was made just for him. He spent over an hour between your legs, sliding his tongue over every inch of skin he could find, sucking and biting the sensitive skin until you were begging him for release, which he took pleasure in denying over and over again.

When he finally slid into you, rubbing gentle circles over your clit, you were so riled up you came instantly. The feeling of being filled and stretched enough to send you over the edge.

He didn't stop though as you held on to his hair and scratched down his back, driving the final nail in the coffin that sent him over the edge as well.

You fell asleep like that, and when you woke up you went again, and then once again after breakfast, plastic ring pops hanging on to your fingers for dear life.

You were in love with George Russell, and he was equally in love with you.

Horny bastards that you were.

#my thots #george thots #george russell #gr63 #f1 #formula1 #formula 1 rpf #george russell x reader #george russell smut

218 notes · View notes

sondheim-girly · 16 days ago

Text

ok im gonna get my yap on, because Brody Grant has so much power in this fandom and I need to talk about why. Am I overthinking this? Yes. Is everything I’m about to say super obvious? Also yes. But who cares.

Ok so some might say “oh the fandom just likes him cuz he’s hot” and the thing is, yes hes hot, but so is the entire cast? And I can’t think of anyone else in the cast who can break the fandom with one single appearance. I think the key of it is the fact that hes unpredictable and always leaves us wanting more. See, back before the Tonys he was doing a lot of press, both for opening and as a nominee. And then post Tonys, you had a three month drought where we practically didn’t get any content of him. However we were still riding high from the pre Tonys interviews, so the obsession continued to stay strong. And theres an element of someone not having their entire life and personality on public display that makes them so much more exciting. And then he disappears for an entire month, then comes back blonde and posts a bunch of photos from his trip in Tokyo. He then goes on to start appearing in the occasional Soc Saturday after not appearing in one for literally months, then is in sky’s Instagram, and starts posting on Instagram more!! So hes giving us just barely enough content to keep us sustained, but also leaving us wanting to much more. Theres also a level of mystery that’s just super exciting cuz you literally never know what he’s gonna do. Is he gonna disappear for a month and go blonde? Is he gonna show up on Soc Saturday and yell about a guy named Mike? Who knows. Not to mention how… mysterious the post he just made was? Like who even knows why he posted that?? No clue, but it’s wonderful.

now of course this is how he has maintained this strange hold on the fandom, but how did he get it in the first place? Of course hes good looking, but hes also absurdly talented, and a very charming person. He’s interesting because he has this kinda edgy ‘persona’ tho idk if that’s exactly the right way to describe it, but then you watch an interview with him and hes this super duper genuine, thoughtful, interesting guy! And then u see a clip of him with the cast and hes just really silly and funny. And so he has all these sides to him which is very intriguing. And he just has this like- really sweet smile and also I think the ear cuff and fingerless glove combo is something that definitely had a major effect on the fans. Ok ive kinda lost the plot.

also theres something about him having social media and rarely using it. Because then it’s like oh we could get content but you never know when- there are a lot of cast members who are super active on social media so we get used to it, or actors who don’t have it at all, meanwhile Brody can just get on there, say something, explode the fandom, then leave. Hes also very intentional about what posts he leaves up, which we can tell from his occasional cleansing of his account. Idk what my point is here but I wanted to say something about this

anyways this is my yap. It’s unedited and completely chaotic but I hope y’all enjoyed it.

#jean has thoughts #the outsiders musical #the outsiders broadway #Brody grant

49 notes · View notes

redr0sewrites · 11 months ago

Note

Hi, I love your works! Can you write a hazbin hotel Lucifer x gn punk reader? Like, they dress punk, listen to punk music and are pretty rebellious anarchists? Tysm

YESSSS OFC!!!! also random rose lore but i am such a big green day fan and my mom once went to a green day concert and she talks ab it all the time-

🥀Cw: fluff, Lucifer being a sweetie

🥀HCs:

Lucifer was probably a little confused about your style and ideals when he first met you

he would ask you soooooo many questions about your outfits

hes a little awkward, but he means well 😭

he definitely asked you for music recommendations because you seemed really interested and invested in your style of music

when you started talking all excitedly about your favorite bands and music taste, Lucifer found himself enraptured by your love for the things you enjoy

Lucifer admires your individuality and how you stay true to the things you enjoy, and he also loves your spunky attitude

deep down, he despises heaven and authority figures as much as anyone else and he thinks its hilarious that the two of you are dating

an anarchist and the literal king of hell

once u start recommending your music to him, hes hooked

suddenly every rock or punk song he listens to reminds him of you, and he adores it

i think he'd really enjoy green day, maybe x ray spex too, but he'll ultimately listen to anything u want him too

lucifer ADORES your style too

if you wear studded patch jackets, vests, etc he DEFINITELY designs patches and studs for you

he would give u a little duck or apple pin to put on your jacket!!!

lucifer will help you out with your hair too, he loves detangling it at the end of the day and washing all of the hair spray and spiky styling out

would def help you dye it fun colors too

i mentioned this in my goth hcs, but if you wear a lot of jewelry he loves to fiddle and fidget with it while he's bored

like he'll just be standing next to you and all of a sudden he's playing with the chain necklaces you're wearing or poking the spikes and studs on your jacket just bc he's bored

overall, he's super supportive and sweet

"are you ready, duckling?" Lucifer called, waiting for you to finish getting ready. he had decided to take you out on a date tonight- not to a fancy establishment, no, but to a more hell-born central part of the pentagram to visit some knock-off theme park you'd mentioned weeks ago called LooLoo Land. the both of you thought that the obvious copyright of Lu Lu World was hilarious, and what better place to go on a date than a shitty theme park?

"I'm coming Luci, give me a sec!" you shout, "i'm just finishing up with my accessories". Lucifer hums in response, soon bursting into giggles as you come hurdling down the stairs, tackling him in a hug. you both pulled away after a few seconds, and Lucifer stepped back to admire your outfit. "Is it just me, or have you gotten spikier?" Lucifer chuckled, poking a stud on your jacket as you roll your eyes. "C'mon you, we have to go!" you smile, dragging him out the door as he admired your determined expression. "driving or teleporting?" you ask, and Lucifer shrugs. "you're no help," you grumble, but take his hand. "let's teleport, it'll be quicker." with a smile, Lucifer opens a portal. "Whatever you wish, dear ~"

RAHHHHHH💯💯💯 this one required a bit of research cuz idk as much ab punk culture/music as ik ab goth stuff, but it was still sm fun to write!!!!!

211 notes · View notes

kradogsrats · 5 months ago

Text

like idk maybe this isn't obvious but... post s6 it seems pretty clear that Aaravos's spirit was imprisoned, not his body?

He has Callum switch the pearls, rather than just smash the one that is the prison. It could be that he can't control Callum well enough at this juncture to do something like consciously break the prison open (vs. unconsciously grabbing the wrong one), but no matter how vigilant Callum has become... that just doesn't seem super likely? I think it's more that Callum just can't really do anything useful for him, at the time. He's not crammed in there physically like it's a pokeball—if the prison was broken open, he would have to return to the heavens... and I think there's some reason he doesn't want to do that. He needs to wait for the prison and the staff to be together so the quasar diamond is available.

The Orphan Queen had the Novablade. Could she have been keeping it safe so that no one could free Aaravos and then use it to send him back to the heavens? I guess... but honestly that doesn't make a ton of sense to me. If he's out, he's out—you aren't going to have fewer problems because he's running around corporeally vs. not. No, I think she used it on him. I think they set up a trap where the prison was ready to contain his spirit, then destroyed his physical form to force him into it.

Claudia has to magically build a new body for him. I don't really know what else to say about that? Like that's just literally what happens. I might do a post about the spell itself later, because it's really interesting, but like... it is what it is. They are deliberately drawing a parallel between Aaravos's state and, say, Runaan's. I will also note that it definitely seems like it's a new body for Runaan because he's missing the binding and his arm is uninjured.... but on the other hand, his horn is broken, and it's anyone's guess where the pants came from, so who knows.

Some takeaways:

The Jailer: possibly a lot more fucked up than anticipated, if she knew how to do this!

Archmage Akiyu: FUCK so I don't remember who it was but someone compared Aaravos's prison to a primal stone in the context of having captured an entire physical area/phenomenon in an orb, and I THINK THAT WAS APT. Though I don't personally think it's physical, I've previously noted the possible relationship between primal stones and the draining/storing essence concept of the staff and coins. We don't know a lot about creating primal stones, but at least one source says only archmages are powerful enough to do so.

The Orphan Queen: definitely stabbed a bitch.

#the dragon prince spoilers #s6 spoilers #tdp spoilers #aaravos

87 notes · View notes

clover-system · 7 months ago

Text

The longest list of anti-endo sources I've ever seen

While trying to find something else using Tumblr's infamous search engine, I came across this absolute gem:

NINE SOURCES!!! That's a record!! This is incredible!

@radpocalypse, listen. I am about to tear these to shreds, but before I do, I want you to know that you have my respect for not only compiling the longest list of sources I have ever seen an anti-endo provide, and not only doing so seemingly not directly prompted, but typing out every single link by hand, on mobile, without making a single mistake. Incredible work.

And also, to be completely honest, if I had nine sources supporting a belief, I almost certainly wouldn't look into them this closely. But, hey, that's what strangers on the internet with opposing views are for.

One more thing before the debunk: Endogenic systems do not claim to have DID etc. without trauma. They just don't. Whether it could be possible is often debated as an edge case, usually just to win an argument against someone of the opposing side, but really, it's irrelevant for 99% of the community. A good chunk are questioning OSDD based on later trauma, but as far as I am aware, no one on this website is claiming a completely endogenic plural disorder.

However, I don't want to dismiss entire pages based on this alone without further commentary, and it's a fun intellectual exercise regardless. So, whenever I use green text, I'm just playing Devil's Advocate under the premise of "If I was claiming to have DID without trauma (which neither I nor anyone else afaik is), would this source actually debunk that claim?" My syster will also occasionally pop in with purple, since she was cocon while I was writing this.

My dad just walked into my room and literally said "hey how it's going". You know, like. Like that one post. Amazing.

Anyway, civility established. Now come along with me on this long long journey of ten minutes of reading. Maybe put some music on in the background, if that will help you get through it. I had Near's Theme on while writing.

Here we go.

Link 1: McLean Hospital

Ok, main thing that caught my eye was

According to a 2010 Psychiatric Times article, only 5% of people with DID exhibit obvious switching between identity “states.”

Very interesting! Even with all of the "idk who's fronting" memes, 5% is really not that high. Though maybe online spaces like these help train the ability to identify it? The reference trail leads back to a book by Kluft but I don't really feel like going through dozens of pages for this. Definitely making a note of this though; I wonder if there have been any follow-up studies on this.

Not much to say here other than that. No mention of plurality outside DID.

DID is associated with long-term exposure to trauma, often chronic traumatic experiences during early childhood.

Dissociation—or disconnection from one’s sense of self or environment—can be a response to trauma.

Dissociative identity disorder—a type of dissociative disorder—most often develops during early childhood in kids who are experiencing long-term trauma. This typically involves emotional, physical, and/or sexual abuse; neglect; and highly unpredictable interactions with caregivers.

Why "associated", not "is caused by"? Why "can", not "is"? Why "most often", etc.?

Why such weak language?

Not that it couldn't be weaker.

I vaguely remember McLean getting into some hot water regarding a video they posted about DID, but didn't find anything concrete. Half-remembered anecdote aside, the author seems well-qualified.

C-tier debunk of this position. It's not nothing but it could be a lot better.

Link 2: Psych Central

It occurs in women 9 times more often than in men.

Very interesting statistic, but no citation provided.

Alters can show striking differences. For instance, one alter may speak with a different accent or have a softer way of speaking. They might have different opinions or a different gender identity, and even physical differences — like left- or right-handedness, or the need for a glasses prescription.

That's quite a stark difference here compared to the McLean article. What happened to "alters aren't that noticeable"?

But whatever, these are just interesting tidbits. None of this has anything to do with endogenic plurality. Nothing like "this is the only way to be multiple", no comment whatsoever.

DID is usually associated with adverse experiences in someone’s past and traumatic memories.

Dissociative identity disorder (DID) is a mental health condition with strong links to trauma, especially trauma in childhood.

Bruh. This again?

In fact, the American Psychiatric Association reports that 90% of people with DID have a history of childhood abuse and neglect, based on research from the United States, Canada, and Europe.

Bruh. Seriously? 90%? You know what that leaves, right?

According to your own source, 10% of DID systems are endogenic.

But let's break this down. There's a big difference between the system being endogenic, and the DID being endogenic. This statistic is specifically referring to childhood trauma.

The wording's plenty vague though. This can absolutely be read as completely endogenic DID.

One review article from 2017 about the causes of DID noted that there was relatively little research on the condition to date.

The authors said researchers hadn’t yet investigated potential genetic and epigenetic factors. With epigenetic factors, the experiences and behaviors of your parents and ancestors can influence the function of the genes they pass down to you.

The authors of the review said scientists needed to do more research to investigate whether a person with DID might carry genes that can influence if they develop the condition or not.

This is particularly promising because studies have already shown that genes can influence dissociative disorders in general.

So you're telling me DID might be able to be passed down one or two generations? Wow. Again, this still has nothing to do with endogenic plurality, but I'm really glad I decided to play with this second angle, because it's so much more fun. We're certainly not at intentional self-inflicted DID here, but we are at this point a long way from certainly needing childhood trauma in all cases.

And also the reviewer is a military psychiatrist who specializes in ADHD. So uh. Not bringing our best here.

Link 3: Mayo Clinic

Gotta love an article that's nice and short. This is just a brief summary of a bunch of dissociative disorders. Again, nothing about endogenic plurality.

Starting to run out of things to say about this. This whole post could probably be a fifth the length if I didn't feel like playing on hard mode.

Formerly known as multiple personality disorder, this disorder involves "switching" to other identities. You may feel as if you have two or more people talking or living inside your head. You may feel like you're possessed by other identities.

Each identity may have a unique name, personal history and features. These identities sometimes include differences in voice, gender, mannerisms and even such physical qualities as the need for eyeglasses.

Hey, that reminds me of someone.

There also are differences in how familiar each identity is with the others. Dissociative identity disorder usually also includes bouts of amnesia and often includes times of confused wandering.

Again, McLean looking really odd with its declaration of DID's covertness against great detail like this. However, its author is so far the best qualified. This one just says "Mayo Clinic Staff". Can't even know which of them worked on this. Some of them are psychs, but if any of them specialize in dissociative disorders, it doesn't say so.

Dissociative disorders usually arise as a reaction to shocking, distressing or painful events and help push away difficult memories.

I won't bother quoting even more wishy-washy language because this post is already at an ungodly length (about 1300 words so far) and we're barely a third done. But yeah, suffice to say, no nail-in-the-coffin 100% link to trauma.

Link 4: Rethink

We are a trusted information creator and accredited by the Patient Information Forum (PIF).

Their bold, for once. That's an alarm-ringing corporate phrase if I've ever seen one. Also, first thing on the PIF's website is "balancing the risks and benefits of AI in the production of health information". So this article might've been written by GPT. Awesome. And yeah, a lot of this whole website looks to me like a bunch of interconnected pages with stupidly long articles written by stitching together LLM generations. Does pass GPT0's test though.

This one is so long. I'll take the ten minutes to read through every word, which I don't think @radpocalypse did, just to make sure there's nothing here, but one thing that does catch my eye scrolling down to near the bottom is that they misspelled their first citation.

A quick look at this Carolyn Spring shows a lot being sold and credentials nowhere in sight. Awesome.

So already I don't need to read this. The information here is not at a high level of trustworthiness. It's maybe better than nothing, but seriously, one can and should do better. But I'll read it anyway, just for bonus points. Thanks to AccelaReader for making this bearable.

Many people will experience dissociation at some point in their lives. Lots of different things can cause you to dissociate. For example, you might dissociate when you are very stressed, or after something traumatic has happened to you.

Some of the symptoms of dissociation include the following:

You may have clear multiple identities.

It‘s important to remember that you could have the symptoms of dissociation without a dissociative disorder.

So according to this, multiple identities can be caused by intense but non-traumatic stress, and might not necessarily be a disorder. So, while I admit this is a little bit of a stretch, we're four links in and this is the first mention of plurality in general, so I'll take it. One point for endogenic plurality. (And again, none of this really matters anyway because this is the worst source so far.)

Dissociative identity disorder (DID) is sometimes called ‘Multiple Personality Disorder.

If you have DID you might seem to have 2 or more different identities, called ‘alternate identities.

Two missing closing quotes. Really not a good sign.

They suggest that DID is caused by experiencing severe trauma over a long time in childhood.

Aha! Finally, something concrete against endogenic DID! Too bad it's buried in the worst source yet. If we believed we had DID, we would absolutely not reconsider that based on a sketchy webpage with suboptimal syntax and no credentials.

Ugh, finally done with that one. What a slog.

Link 5: DID Research

Aha! The infamous psych student's blog! That's what Sophie said, anyway. Not taking her word for it though. Let's see what we can find here, independently.

Dissociative identity disorder (DID) is the result of repeated or long-term childhood trauma

Why wasn't this first? First sentence, so crystal clear. No two ways about this, transDID destroyed right out of the gate.

DID cannot form after ages 6-9 because individuals older than these ages have an integrated self identity and history.

Why wasn't this first? It's so plain, so refreshing after four pages of strategic ambiguity. Nothing left here for green. But still no mention of non-disordered plurality.

The author is impressively credentialed but doesn't seem to specialize quite near this area. She's certainly better than most, high above any random Tumblr user talking out of their ass, but the good stuff would be to get a DID specialist to explicitly spell out that endogenic systems are not possible.

Also should make note of this big fat legal disclaimer:

While the author strives to make information on this website as complete, reliable, and accurate as possible, the author makes no claims, promises, guarantees, or warranties about the accuracy, completeness, or adequacy of the contents of this site and expressly disclaims liability for errors and omissions in the contents of this site.

If we did claim to have DID, this would rattle us a little but could ultimately be brushed aside.

Link 6: SANE

As usual, literally nothing about endogenic plurality. I'll just greenmode this.

The majority of people with DID have been through severe trauma in early childhood

And now back to our regularly scheduled nondefinitive language.

Fun fact: highlighting text on this website turns it invisible. Awesome.

A person needs to meet the following criteria to be diagnosed with DID:

- Two or more distinct identities or personality states, each with its own way of thinking and relating. - Amnesia and gaps in the recall of everyday events, personal information or traumatic events. - The experiences are not part of normal cultural or religious practice, or part of childhood imaginary play. For example, a child having an imaginary friend does not mean they have DID. - The symptoms are not because of substance abuse or other medical conditions.

Ah finally, a direct quote from the good ol' DSM. Notice the lack of a trauma requirement.

Funny enough, using only these criteria in isolation, we actually would count as having DID due to our grayout memory gaps when switching. DID is also listed in the dissociative disorders section of the DSM, not the trauma disorders section, so there is no implied criterion there either. However, there still remains the universal criterion of distress, which we do not fulfill. We are quite happy with ourselves.

DID is caused by severe childhood trauma, such as physical, verbal or sexual abuse.

Well, which is it?? Is it a majority association or a direct cause? Why the contradiction? Or is the emphasis on early childhood trauma?

Eh, whatever. Point is, green is once again shut down. But there is still no mention of endogenic plurality anywhere here!!

And no indication of who wrote this article, though the citation for direct cause is a dissociative disorder specialist. Does he actually say that in the cited paper, though?

Dissociative identity disorder (DID) is multifactorial in its etiology. Whereas psychosocial etiologies of DID include developmental traumatization and sociocognitive sequelae, biological factors include trauma-generated neurobiological responses. Biologically derived traits and epigenetic mechanisms are also likely to be at play. At this point, no direct examination of genetics has occurred in DID. However, it is likely to exist, given the genetic link to dissociation in general and in relation to childhood adversity in particular.

I hope you have a dictionary on hand. That sure is a lot of big words that aren't in Firefox's built-in spellchecker. Still, after making sure I got everything, it's clearly not so cut and dry here. And we're back on the "it could be genetic" point.

Tangentially related: I do like the dismissal of the iatrogenic model on the basis of the brain scans.

Neurobiological differences have been demonstrated between dissociative identities within patients with DID and between patients with DID and controls. Given the current evidence, DID as a diagnostic entity cannot be explained as a phenomenon created by iatrogenic influences, suggestibility, malingering, or social role-taking. On the contrary, DID is an empirically robust chronic psychiatric disorder based on neurobiological, cognitive, and interpersonal non-integration as a response to unbearable stress.

Anyway, we're not even on the original page anymore, so I'll call it here. No mention of endogenic plurality, and the citation that claims to dismiss endogenic DID doesn't.

Link 7: NAMI Michigan

While the causes [of DID] are unknown

I'm tired. Aren't you tired?

Treatment for DID consists primarily of psychotherapy with hypnosis.

Yeah I'm calling BS on this one

And no citations on this entire page, nor even the author's name.

Statistics show that DID occurs in 0.01 to 1 percent of the general population.

Research has shown that the average age for the initial development of alters is 5.9 years old.

No sources listed. This is definitely the worst link. Literally on the same level as a rambling Tumblr user in terms of credibility.

Doesn't matter that it says

This disorder is believed to be triggered by physical or sexual abuse in childhood

Couldn't even get this dogshit source to be firm.

This one gets an F.

Link 8: The Psychology Practice

Got scared for a moment there that it said ai. No, that's AL, a name. Also this was written in 2022, so we're definitely safe. Can't actually find any other info on this AL character, but at least we can look up the co-author.

Hm, can't find anything on her, either. Well, at least this is a step up from the previous link. Let's see what it has to say.

According to the Dissociative Identity Research Organisation (2018), DID is formed in childhood due to repeated trauma in early childhood (before age 10) before the personality is fully integrated.

I do like that these later links are direct with this. They don't seem to have a citation for that DIRO, though. Unless...

No. Oh no.

Ok, so this one was written by a couple of clowns who definitely didn't do their homework. Cool. I'm getting tired of humoring awful sources like this, so moving on to the grand finale.

Link 9: NAMI

Wait, this is the same group behind the zero-citation article from Michigan! But that was just Michigan. Maybe the main site can do better.

Ugh, it's just another list of dissociative disorders instead of DID specifically.

The symptoms of a dissociative disorder usually first develop as a response to a traumatic event,

Aren't you tired? Aren't you tired? Aren't you tired?

Often these identities may have unique names, characteristics, mannerisms and voices.

Often? Wow. Sure is a far cry from 5%.

Dissociative disorders are managed through various therapies including: - Psychotherapies such as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) - Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) - Medications such as antidepressants can treat symptoms of related conditions

No mention of hypnosis, allegedly the primary method of treatment?? (/sarc)

and there was no mention of plurality being exclusive to dissociative disorders

Oh, and no listed authors either.

So, after three thousand words of analysis, all we've come up with are nothing burgers, dogshit, and dogshit nothing burgers. Out of nine links, only one briefly and indirectly touched on endogenic plurality, and it was in favor. Even the argument against the traumaless DID strawman is weak at best. These sources are bad, to put it lightly.

@radpocalypse, if you're reading this, firstly, thank you for powering through your ADHD and dyslexia to read thousands of words dunking on your masterpiece. Secondly, if you have any more sources that you think are backing you, feel free to send them my way. Just uh, maybe read them more closely next time?

And that goes for everyone here. If you think you have a better source, or if I made a mistake or missed something here, I am open to correction. I am open to the idea that I'm wrong and I have some unknown trauma to work through, but I certainly won't go digging unless I have good reason to believe it's there, and I haven't seen any good reason. And if you haven't either, maybe it's time to reconsider your position.

One last thing before I go.

Have you ever actually seen a pro-endo carrd, let alone one cited in standalone? I haven't.

Here's a much longer list of much better sources than yours supporting endogenic plurality compiled by the traumagenic Guardians System. I don't expect you to read anywhere near the whole thing; just pick a few links at random. And yes, while many of them are peer-reviewed papers, some of them are Tumblr posts, but those Tumblr posts cite peer-reviewed papers, so it's all good.

Thanks for reading.

#syscourse #sysconversation

139 notes · View notes