#idk if any of this makes sense at all but oh well!
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nobody knows • portgas d. ace
another drabble for sneaky link/ex boyfriend ace bc I have one functioning brain cell and all of it is focused on him atm teehee 🤭
wc: 1.8K
more infidelity (y’all both still AIN’T SHIT 😭 reader got that dog in her I’m sorry), straight porn, modern au, black fem reader, phone sex/sexting, squirting, oral sex, calls reader bitch, a eating + anal, recording, backshots, rough sex, heavy breeding, idk what else will come out
he’s so ooc in this and I don’t give a fuck (I’m ovulating and stressed w life + therapy is too expensive)
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nobody knows why you and ex-boyfriend!ace broke up in the first place. Honestly, it seemed like such a waste…three long years down the drain with nothing to show for it but the two of you left in shambles. Friends and family consoling you both as you learned to navigate life without one another. (Y/N), moving on fairly quickly with the son of one of your dad’s friends..a byproduct of military nepotism and the very antithesis to what Ace was. A stiff working a cushy desk job and reaping the benefits..pushing papers and always playing it safe. He was very kind, sweet and damn near ideal in every sense of the word. Not too much of a drinker, a partygoer or anything of the sort but he always took you on dates. All of your girlfriends liked him well enough, thinking that he more matched your speed than the thrill seeking, goofy, chaotic daredevil that was ex-boyfriend!ace. Who rode motorcycles and climbed mountains in his spare time, when he wasn’t holding life by the tips of his fingers as an EMT. Covered in tattoos, he looked like such a quintessential, stereotypical ‘bad boy’… “God, (y/n). I don’t know what you ever saw in that guy. He’s a loser, through and through.”
However, what nobody knows..is that you never truly left him alone! He was your ideal match and you couldn’t shake it. You could actually laugh, joke and make mistakes with him. There was no need for faux perfection and lies. You saw each other for who you really were.
Nobody knows that while you’re at work, he’s constantly sending you filthy messages to get you aroused and worked up. Making you chew your lip and the tip of your pen as you twirl in your chair..reading how he’s going to make sure you feel it in your stomach the next time you two link. Nobody knows he shamelessly sends you nut videos, uttering your name with the sexiest moans. Nobody knows that when you tell your assistant that the hour where you refuse any meetings is designated for you to choke on ex-boyfriend!ace’s cock in your cute little business attire..loving the way those glasses hang off the tip of your nose as he pushes your forehead to his pelvis.
“Goddamn, babe..I knew I couldn’t quit you..you’re eating my dick up so good.”
“It’d taste even better if you let me come on it first.”
loving that you were willing to abandon all of your morals for him so easily. Nobody knows about the second phone you keep stashed away in your glovebox just to call him late at night when your new man is sleeping or working overnight and you want some company..
“Can you please come over? I miss you..he won’t be back tonight. I promise.”
“Of course, baby. Anything for you..I’ll always come running when you tell me.”
or in need of a good orgasm because that dummy couldn’t give you one if you handed him a roadmap to the clit! With ex-boyfriend!ace on the other line talking you through it with that deep voice and lewd commands.
“Oh my gosh, pretty girl. Did you call me just so you could touch yourself to the sound of my voice? You’re so cute..” making you FaceTime him because he wants to see the mess he helped create.
nobody knows that whilst you're out at dinner with your new man, alongside loved ones as he boasts about how he knows you’re the one and how you guys make such a lovely couple, (y/n) is daydreaming about ex-boyfriend!ace riding you on the back of his Suzuki through the city, knowing the rush gets you turned on. That rather than dealing with an insecure little boy who felt intimidated by your looks and success, ex-boyfriend!ace would go drinking and partying with you, loving when you showed off your body because he wasn't worried about another man taking what was his. Nobody knows that you have a small tattoo of ex-boyfriend!ace’s name right above your private area. Hell, it's not as if your new man touched you enough to notice and when he did, the lights remained off.
When your girlfriends are divulging the dirt about their relationships and how envious they are of you. Claiming that you hit the jackpot with such a structured, well mannered guy who works a high paying job and always comes home to you. But what nobody knows…is that he could never replace the man you truly love. So much so, when you kiss him on the cheek that Friday evening before heading to the ‘airport’ for another business trip..you’re secretly meeting ex-boyfriend!ace in the top floor suite at a luxury hotel hours away from home where you two go every month to fuck each other's brains out for three days straight. Akin to addicts who can’t be satisfied, you rabidly devour one another until your bodies quit.
“I’ve waited all week for this…I’m so not sorry for how I’m about to fuck you.” ”I wouldn’t expect anything less.” Wrapping his hands around your throat, shoving his tongue into your mouth as he corners you against a wall. Nobody knows that ex!boyfriend!ace has you face down on a mattress with your ass up in the air as his tongue explores both of your entrances. Practically seating you on his face to suction around that clit, flicking his tongue in and out of your tight cunt before prodding your asshole, leaving a sloppy trail of saliva on each of them. Because you wore that adorable little heart shaped plug to help prep you for the weekend.
“You taste so fucking good…especially when I know you’ll let me have it anytime I want.”
nobody knows that you’re somewhere gripping the sheets for dear life as ex-boyfriend!ace delivers the most insane backshots you’ve ever felt. Those perfectly round, thick cheeks ricocheting off of his lower half..the contrast in your skin and that pearlescent scream surrounding his shaft making the sight even better…ripping orgasms from your body with no shame because he deserves it. After all, you belong to him.
“That’s right..come on this dick, bitch. Give me what I want..” he still loves and respects you all the same. But ace knows you prefer rough, degrading sex far more than the mundane and vanilla. Especially when it was in short supply with your current situation. Even going as far as to place a foot on your head, tugging your arms behind your back so that he can really bury his cock inside of you.
“Yes! Keep fucking meeee, just like that, daddy. ‘S so good!”
“You love when I dig you out like this, treating you like a little slut..’swear this pussy’s going to get me in some serious trouble one day. But I don’t care, I love you.”
rambling on as he feels you twitching around him for the third time, leaving splatters of warm juices each time; squirting immensely from the constant stimulation to your spot.
“Damn, you’re coming so hard, pretty girl. Is he not fucking you right?” Laughing before he could even get the very rhetorical question from his mouth. Leaning down to place a trail of pecks and licks on your spine to console you before placing you into a prone position. ”Of course not..nobody knows this body better than me. Isn’t that right, gorgeous?” All but confirmed by the way you’re tightening around him..he can’t help but to grip your throat and steal sloppy kisses from you whilst he drills you into the mattress. “Nooo, babyyy. You’re the only one who can fuck me this good..oh my Goddd—“ placing his camera in your face so that he could have it for safekeeping..(and in case he gets wind of your man running his mouth about him again!) Making you call his name and scream it to the heavens. “Aceeee, fuck meeee..”
Nobody knows that you’ve been fucking for damn near an hour while your phone buzzes with missed calls and texts from your boyfriend and whatever little girl he’s deciding to entertain for the moment. As heinous as it was, you were just filling the void and you’d always find your way back to each other. Perhaps it was the thrill of sneaking around that kept this charade going. Either way, you weren’t giving each other for a long time and it’s so obvious why..no one else will do the freaky shit that you both crave so much.
“Oh my gosh, I can’t believe you’re letting me fuck your ass again..feels amazing.” glaring up at him with the most adoring gaze in your eyes and smile on your face as you proudly hold a vibrator to your clit..allowing him to stretch that opposite opening. Practically coming on spot when you began to show your gratitude for this pleasure…
“Thank you, daddy..using all my holes like this. I love it so much.” That much apparent by the tears pouring down your face alongside that toothy grin. Only he could give it to you so good, you begin to cry!
“Oh shit..of course, gorgeous girl. I’d do anything for you..anything to see my baby smile.” Including pinning you down by your throat and letting trails of saliva drip into your mouth. Even feeding you a couple slaps when you all but pleaded with him to treat you like an object.
nobody knows that on the sparse occasions when you have sex with your current man, he’s forced to wear a condom because you’ve discussed several times that you don’t want children and you’re not taking any risks. But ex-boyfriend!ace gets the privilege of feeling that hard cock sliding in and out of you raw..and to breed you as many times as he can muster! Letting load after load spill into your aching womb. Filling every hole with that dripping seed.
“You look so pretty stuffed with my cum, sweetheart. Just how I like it.”
nobody knows why you left ex-boyfriend!ace in the first place but you knew why you’d always come running back!
@violetxxvenom @shamelesshoefairy @lwop-kpop
#cherry’s works ✦⭒#black fem reader#portgas d ace#portgas ace x reader#portgas d ace x black reader#ace x black reader#one piece#one piece x black!reader#one piece x reader#one piece x black reader#black reader#portgas ace x y/n#portgas ace x you#portgas ace smut#one piece modern au#one piece fanfiction#one piece smut#op smut#ace headcanons#fire fist ace#op headcanons#ace drabble#one piece drabble#cw toxic relationship#cw infidelity#cw cheating#ex boyfriend ace is my new religion goodbye#cw smut#this is pure filth I’m so sorry 😭#hope y’all like it though
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having. thoughts 😄😄
#challengers#i am so normal about them 😊😊😊 can you tell#i am having so many Thoughts i needed to organize them or i was gonna go (more) insane#idk if any of this makes sense at all but oh well!#character analysis#(if u squint)#art donaldson#patrick zweig#tashi duncan#i REFUSE to tag tashi as tashi donaldson ao3 im looking at u
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Jimithon Mouthwashing is such a good representation of untreated, enabled NPD like it makes me want to squeeze the life out of him. I'm endlessly fascinated when watching him interact with his crew, surroundings, and himself because he's so fucking lost in his own sauce. It's insane. If I'm being real, it makes him my favorite character in the game.
It's a little scary to say, but watching Jimmy is like seeing a mirrored version of myself two years ago before I truly committed to treatment for my NPD. He's like a shadow. The opening line "I hope this hurts," which I believe comes from Jimmy right before the crash, is such a poignant statement. It's a simple line, but I can tell you from experience that the desire to hurt others when in a narcissistic rage is overwhelming. It's such a good line to sum up Jimmy's character in that moment. Luckily, in the real world, I had my friends and family there to catch me when I hit my lowest, even though I'd hurt them so many times. Jimmy probably could've used friends to force him into therapy (cough cough Curly cough cough)
#also I don't mean we're similar in any way when it comes to rape or SA. Please don't twist it that way at all.#I mean like in terms of the jealously resentment revenge hurting others to feel thrilled not taking responsibility not seeing flaws etc#I'm diagnosed with NPD also but pls know my experience will be different from others. We're all different people obvs.#also Jimmy has like wayyyyyyyyyy more things wrong with him not just untreated NPD lol#I would say that untreated NPD is a hell most can't describe#you barely feel anything except rage boredom and jealousy (in my case)#love is a form of ownership and control because you can't really feel it the right way#so your -person- is an object of intense obsession and also a tool for you#if that makes sense? I see that with Jimmy and Curly for sure#You want to tear others down and hurt them because it makes you feel good to put them below you#there's a constant feeling of insecurity and it drives you crazy fr#kind gestures from friends feel insulting#and oh my god achievements made by friends and family in my case feel like I've been shot like I hate when they achieve things#It's not logical obvs but that's something I instantly noticed in Jimmy so i was like .....oh brother lol#and also if they achieve something my brain needs it to somehow be tied to me or I'll make it tied to me so they can be thankful#they should always center their attention on me and if they don't I immediately resent them#these are just some of my thought processes on the matter so I can show the similarities I feel with Jimmy#the KEY DIFFERENCE is all of these thoughts I have are left in my head and not exhibited in my actions (any more. took a long time)#but he is such a nasty human with ZERO introspection that he prob never even thought about treatment#also doesn't help that the hot blonde he's friends with never did anything to help with that#idk sorry for oversharing but ahhh this game is so well written I gotta yap about it lol#also kind of a funny unrelated story to show how weird the achievement thing can be lol#my friends announced they saved up enough to go to Vietnam (their dream trip) and I was happy for them (I really was)#but of course my delusional ass immediately also took it as a threat#and I booked a month long trip to Europe a few days after so I could also announce it LMAO#that is a kind of innocent incident when compared to Jimmy but it just shows how annoying NPD can be#Jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#NPD
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Oh, I know that cliffhanger was so mean 😂 But I'm happy we're finally here at the (soon) happy end 💕
Me presenting the mess lmao:
First, I've gotta say how pretty the color scheme and art is for this fic, Wayne. So delicate and lovely. 👌🏽🩷🩵
Aww, thank you, Alex! I fully went with the fic title inspiration for that one lol. Can't beat the Swiftie outta me after sixteen years 😂🩵🩷 (And I genuinely love the new tumblr functions. About damn time!)
Clearly Ben isn't taking this well (nor should he, tbf). It really got me when he said that she was his best friend -- his only friend as well as his love. I get that he feels betrayed, but though he's come a long way, he still hasn't matured enough not to lash out at her over the phone. 🙄
Ooof, that phone call was rough, wasn't it? But I think he really panicked when she said that and instantly reverted back to his old self that probably gives him more confidence and protection 😭💔
I love and melt every time when he calls her his only (and best) friend because he certainly realized that when he was in rehab lol. But let's face it – he's not a people person that makes friends easily 😂
askasdnawjf omfg, BEN. 💀💀💀
Oh, you just know that man shamelessly enjoys Mrs. Brooks' flirting 🤣🤣🤣
Awwww Benny. 🥹 This kid's probably the only reason Ben's holding it together. I loved Ben's internal monologue of how he's trying to do better for his son, but also feels guilty for even saying in anger that he's not his real son. 😭 I truly hope the kid never actually hears about that later. Idk if my heart could take it! 😂
I was a little worried it might be too OOC, but he did learn and grow a lot in rehab and after that whole Homelander thing, I could really see him accept the boy as his own eventually, especially since it's just been the two of them alone all this time. I think if reader were there, they might not even have bonded as much 💚
But it's so sweet when he really tries to do better than his own father, even though some methods are still a little quesionable 😂🫶
Oooh this makes so much sense that he would keep a vial of V for emergencies. Like as much as we don't want that for him at this point, the danger of this world and how it views Ben might push him to do something drastic to save his family.
There was no way he wasn't keeping something for emergencies. Although he's happy where he is now, I don't think he'll ever fully trust the peace and will always cling to Soldier Boy as his go-to protection lol
And kudos to him for not using it so far! God knows that would've been an easy fix for him to be with his wife again 😭
lol at least she knows him well. 😅 She knows he didn't mean the shit he said, even if it did cut her down to the bone.
She does lol. And I found her whole attitude toward it really gracious. We all mess up sometimes and no one's perfect. Sometimes things we don't mean slip out in the heat (or hurt) of the moment... 🙈
loll baby steps. 😅
Their little breakfast together as a family was so wholesome and lovely (despite Ben's mouth lol)!
lol all the baby steps with him 😂 But I loved showing how Ben was slowly adjusting to the new world of the 21st century
LOL yeeeah, kids are hard work, Ben. Now he sees for himself. 🤣🤣
We all know that man just wants to spread his seed and not put in any of the work 😂😭 But Benny surely taught him a lesson on that one lmao
I never thought of it this way, but that's such an interesting (and delicious) power imbalance with SB that you would never see coming in a fic. Such good storytelling. 👌🏽
Aww, thank you! I loved the opportunity to show some reversed roles for once. And it really opened Ben’s eyes to how some of his lovers might have felt lol
Oh GODDDD. Are you pulling in the Gen V virus?!
I did – kinda lol. I wrote Rehab before Gen V and S4 came out, but I figured this is good way for a cure loophole haha. But since the series is already its own AU/timeline, I made some minor adjustments to the OG virus 🤓
I have to wonder if Neuman in on it and that's why she sent our girl home. Or maybe someone else is targetting her, or she caught the virus somehow by accident? Oh good lord. 😰 Ben's REALLY gonna need to step it up if he's going to save her (and himself really).
Honestly, I could’ve easily turned this into a multi-chapter conspiracy, but I tried to keep it short, sweet, and uncomplicated for once before I accidentally ruin their happy end again 😂🩷
But I figured just all the traveling and airports would expose her more, and it all just trickles down to bad luck (or maybe a blessing in disguise) 😉
Lover – Part 1
Series Summary: Free from his past, Ben’s trying to move on and find a little drop of happiness in this new world. But when he finally holds everything he ever wanted in his hands, it threatens to slip through the cracks, and he has to fight one final time with everything he’s got to keep it.
🫡 Catch up here! Sequel to Rehab & Video Games.
Pairing: Soldier Boy/Ben x female!Reader
Warnings: 18+ due to language & mature themes, established relationship, Soldier Boy x wife!reader, angst, discussions of divorce, Dad!Soldier Boy, human!Soldier Boy, SB trying to be an ally (trust me it's a warning lol), fluff, (the beginnings of) smut
Word Count: 4.6k
A/N: Sid and Nancy are back to finally get their happy end for Valentine's 💕 The road might be a little bumpy until then, but we'll get there 😉
Disclaimer: This is a sequel story. The reader and Soldier Boy met at a rehab facility in 2025 after both being cured of Compound V. Reader became a supe again at the end of the series and is still currently a supe with acidic powers. Seriously guys, catch up with the links above. I can't explain everything... 😝
Main Masterlist || Series Masterlist || Tag List
Part 1: Lovelorn
The crystalline water of the small lake is peaceful, a calm Ben appreciates as he sits on the dock, his bow legs hanging down and feet almost touching the perfectly still surface. But underneath the serenity roars a thundering storm, his mind reeling like the fishing pole in his grasp without an end in sight.
“Fuck that! Fuck all of that shit, Y/N! I fucking love you. I’m sick and tired of those games. How many fucking times do I have to tell you that I miss you, huh? I don’t wanna do this anymore. I don’t wanna call you and hope you have time to pick up. I don’t wanna text you and wait hours for a fucking answer. I don’t wanna fuck you through a dumbass screen. I miss you. I miss my wife. I miss actual goddamn sex, for fuck’s sake!”
“I know. I miss all of that, too. Maybe it’s time. Maybe we should finally talk about it.”
“Talk about what?”
“Divorce.”
Remembering the word brings forth another surge of paralyzing anger. His jaw clenches, the grip around the pole tightening. He’s sure even the fish can feel his fury since they refuse to bite this evening. A flicker of sunlight that reflects on the water’s surface then hits his green eyes, flashes of the haunting night flowing freely into his mind.
“Are you fucking kidding me right now? You wanna fucking divorce me?!”
“Ben, just listen–“
“No, you fucking listen! You’re my fucking wife, and you’re not fucking leaving me! You understand? Till death do us part, sweetheart, and I fucking mean it.”
Ben’s heart twinges at the memory. He recalls how she startled at his threat, not knowing he regretted those words as soon as he said them. He remembers how her breath halted, how her hands jittered, and how the tears brimmed in her eyes.
“Ben, I just want you to be happy. You’re supposed to have a family. Everything you ever wanted…”
“So were you. You’re supposed to be fucking here. With me. And the kid. We’re supposed to do this fucking thing together. Remember?”
“But I can’t!”
“Can’t or don’t fucking want to, huh?”
“Ben, I don’t wanna keep you trapped. This way, you can find someone new. Someone who can give you want you want.”
“You don’t fucking get it, do you? No one can give me want I fucking want but you. I wanna fucking be with you!”
“Ben…”
“No, you know what? You wanna fucking leave me like all the others, go fucking right ahead!”
“Ben–“
“You want me to fuck someone else so badly? Be fucking happy? Fucking fine! Consider your wish granted, wifey. Guess, I’m going out tonight and fuck some other slut. Who knows, maybe I’ll fucking knock her up, too! Get a real fucking kid…”
“Ben!”
“Fuck you, my love!”
Ben doesn’t even remember if he hung up before he flung the phone against wall. All he knows is that he had to get a new one the next morning.
And moreover, he did go out that very same night. He called the neighbor, Mrs. Brooks – a fine, older widow in her 70s – and asked her to keep an eye on the kid while he went to the local watering hole. She was the kid’s usual babysitter and very fond of both him and the little slugger. She was also constantly flirting with him. It was only too bad Ben couldn’t get her pregnant…
At the bar, he then met Cynthia – a petite redhead with a huge rack, a perfectly shaped ass, and ideal child-bearing hips in a tight, glittery, emerald dress. It shone like a neon sign.
He bought her three drinks, and she constantly touched his arm as he whispered dirty things into her ear. He could’ve easily persuaded her to come to the dingy pub’s bathroom with him, where he’d rail her from behind till she saw fucking stars and was dripping his cum. But the scrape of her nails against his skin caused him to shudder over and over again – not in the good way – and he cursed himself for fucking missing his wife. He also remembered how shitty he'd felt the last time he had executed similar revenge plans…
This wouldn’t do, so he ditched the floozy there on the spot and returned to an empty house, angrier and more frustrated than before.
Ben fucking hates everything and everyone.
“Dad, look! I got it on by myself,” his six-year-old announces and holds up both hook and worm with a proud and wide grin to show him.
Ben forces a smile to his lips. “Good job, buddy.”
He tries his best to hide his envenomed mood from his son. He recalls how he always hated it when his own father took his personal shit out on him. Ben vows to do better, although the focus should really be on the term trying.
He fails more often than not.
Another regret of that night trickles into his mind then, one that haunts and tortures him more than the other hateful things he’s spewed.
“Who knows, maybe I’ll fucking knock her up, too! Get a real fucking kid…”
Sure, in the beginning, Ben thought he’d never really view the kid as his own flesh and blood, but he would’ve gone along with it for her. Y/N once called them a family of misfits – forgotten and lost souls cast out by the rest of society. But they’d always have each other and that was what counted.
Where the fuck is she now, though?
When she didn’t come with them to start their new life, Ben pretty much wrote the whole ‘found family’ bullshit off as a lost cause. He’d never get along with the kid, he was constantly frustrated by the little rascal’s shenanigans and outbursts, all the while his long-distance wife urged him to be patient over a fucking phone.
Ben’s felt fucking alone most days.
However, with a firm hand, a level head, and some old-school discipline, Ben’s managed the impossible and set the kid on the right track. Now, little Ben’s staying out of playground trouble, being nice to his teachers, and getting straight-As.
Alright, fine…
Out of sheer boredom and not because he was desperate, Ben might have read those stupid parenting books Y/N got him for Christmas: The Gentle Parenting Book, Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child, and Parenting from the Inside Out.
Bunch of sissy bullshit if you ask Ben. He wanted a fucking Rolex under the tree and not coded messages wrapped in nice paper. And moreover, he’ll never admit that hogwash has actually helped, even if the Russians take him and torture him for another forty years.
It’s been a fucking struggle, but the boy’s grown on him. And in all honesty, the kid probably resembles him more than the firstborn who shares his bloodline. Sometimes, Ben even (quietly) thinks it’s a fucking good thing the kid doesn’t have an ounce of his DNA.
So, now they go camping and fishing together. They go to the bowling alley, the arcade, and to local high school football games. Ben tries to teach the boy what he knows (to the best of his abilities). And a few weeks ago, the kid suddenly started to call him the D-word. Y/N, on the other hand, has received the M-word pretty instantly – and she’s a fucking great mother, even from afar.
And at first, Ben surely considered it fucking weird since the kid isn’t really his, but, well, the word’s grown on him as much as the boy himself.
Ben still feels fucking guilty for even merely suggesting he wasn’t his real son – because he is, and he hopes the kid never finds out he ever uttered those words in the first place.
The former supe sighs internally. What has she fucking done to him? He wouldn’t mind the change as much if he got to keep the reward…
His mind flickers with a glimmer of an idea when the fading sunlight hits the shimmering veil again. The solution to everything, one little blue vial, is hidden right underneath the wooden floorboards of his bedroom. He’s thought about it a lot.
He could be with her. She wouldn’t have to be scared to hurt him. He could be someone again. Nothing could break him anymore.
Sometimes, that shit was harder to quit than fucking drugs. No wonder they needed a whole-ass rehab for it.
Ben’s keeping it for emergencies, though. In case he needs to protect her – or his family, his kid. In case that Neuman cunt turns on her because he surely doesn’t trust that booger-brain bitch. He keeps it in case he feels weak.
He also keeps a vial of the cure in case she changes her mind and takes it after all. But sometimes he’s scared to ask or push too hard because it very likely would kill her, and he couldn’t fucking live with that.
Because of what? Because he’s being a whiny pussy who wants to risk his wife’s life over a fucking kiss? A fuck?
It sounds insane. He doesn’t want this.
She’s more than his wife, too. She’s his fucking best friend and the only one he’s ever had. Maybe that’s why it hurts so fucking much. How could she even think for a second he’d rather fucking leave and do this with some fucking stranger?
Doesn’t she believe he’s changed? Not even her? Who else is there, then?
“Dad?” His son blinks at him with that look he can’t say no to. Why the fuck are children always doing that? “Can we order pizza? I don’t think the fish are biting.”
“I think you’re right. And hey, I can always go for pizza. Great idea, buddy,” Ben says and can see the kid brighten up at his words. He’d always wanted his father to call him “buddy” or “slugger” – or something other than a fucking disappointment.
What about the kid? pops into his mind. If he takes Compound V again, what happens to his son? What if he becomes one of the monsters Ben’s trying to protect him from? He knows all too well how that shit fucked with his mind the first time around. It’s not as easy.
“Hey.”
Ben’s heart stills like the water in front of him as the soft melody of her voice reaches his ears. He presses his eyes shut as the kid ditches his fishing pole on the dock and dives straight into her waiting arms.
“Mommy!”
“Hey, buddy, I missed you.” She smiles and tousles his hair, but her eyes drift to the far end of the dock where her husband still sits and doesn’t bother to even face her. “I got a surprise for you inside in the kitchen, Benny. You wanna go run ahead and check it out? Your dad and I will join you soon.”
“Cool! Awesome! See ya!”
Their son bolts so fast toward the house, Y/N’s surprised he doesn’t stumble in the grass once. She then lets out a sigh when her attention turns back to her sulking husband.
“You’re gonna acknowledge me at all or just ignore me for the rest of your life?” she prompts, a bit of venom on her tongue.
Yes, she knows her words hurt him, even though they were said with the best intentions. She knows she’s failing as a wife and mother. She knows they both deserve better. She just wanted him to have the option.
However, she can’t say his words haven’t hurt her, too. And it hurt even more when he ignored her for two weeks straight, kept her from their son, and never returned any of her calls or messages.
She knows Ben’s a big man-child, though. Rehab didn’t entirely fix that.
“Not sure yet,” he finally answers but still doesn’t even gift her a glance over his broad and brooding shoulder.
“Oh, it speaks.” She can’t help the bits of sarcasm but is aware she has to tread carefully now. “You’ve been ignoring me for two weeks.”
“Don’t have much to fucking say to you…” Ben grabs a bottle of beer from the cooler next to him, twists it open, and occupies his mouth with a gulp before he says something else he regrets. “‘Sides, my phone broke. Got a new one.”
“Something you usually tell your wife,” she mutters bitterly under her breath.
“Yeah, but not you’re fucking ex-wife,” he retorts.
“We’re still married.”
“Does it fucking matter?” Ben counters and takes another sip.
“I hope it does,” she mumbles and sighs once more, pocketing her hands in her jacket. It’s gotten cold outside – much like their marriage. “Guess that means you haven’t seen my press conference this morning?”
“Nope. Don’t fucking care,” Ben scoffs. He sounds more than a little bitter before his raspy voice ramps up with pettiness. “Already got a new piece of ass. Better fuck than you ever were. Sorry, doll.”
Y/N purses her lips, her head bobbing when he throws the dagger that aims for her heart. He could’ve still been Soldier Boy, and she would’ve believed him. And somehow, she isn’t surprised by his reaction, which really is the sad part. Her heart floods with hurt; her mind berates him and calls him every goddamn name in the book she’s ever learned from him.
Broken promises – that is the theme of their marriage.
Instead of pouring oil into the fire, however, she decides to stay calm. They’ve been through so much together. She’s already forgiven him once, she can do it again.
No one’s perfect. Not her. Not him. Especially him.
“I resigned this morning.”
Yup. Ben feels immediate regret for the lie he’s told.
He’s so stumped by her words, his head finally twists over his shoulder with wide eyes and a raised brow. Their gazes meet for the first time, and Ben is reminded why he had avoided eye contact.
She is breathtakingly beautiful.
“Look, uhm… I know this is my fault,” she starts and swallows thickly. Her eyes are so focused on the tips of her boots, she doesn’t even notice he has gotten up from his spot and is strolling closer to her. “I shouldn’t have said it. Not over the phone, not like this. I don’t wanna divorce you, okay? I don’t wanna fucking leave you. I love you, even when you drive me nuts, which you do quite a lot… But the point is – I want this with you. I’ve always wanted this with you… I’ve been working really hard to control my powers and doing meditations, and Vicky even got me a trainer… I want this to work, ok–“
She’s cut off by his lips on hers. His massive hands cup her entire face and hold her so close to him, she’s not sure they’re not melting into one person altogether. He kisses her so deeply as if he hasn’t done it in ages, which he hasn’t.
And sure, surprising her is probably not the smartest idea, considering she could accidentally kill him. But he’s always lived for a good adrenaline rush.
“Ben!” she gasps, eyes wide. But she doesn’t pull away like she usually does. She even keeps her palms placed on his beating heart. She giggles a little at his eagerness and is positively baffled by his reaction. It patches the wounds on her heart a bit.
“I fucking lied, okay? It’s not true. I didn’t-… There’s no one else, alright?” he assures her quickly, thumb brushing her glowing cheeks. “You believe me?”
He’s almost nervous that she won’t. He can’t even blame her, considering his track record. But to his relief, her lips rise to a soft smile.
“I do,” she replies, causing his heart to downright soar. “Don’t ask me why, because I have no fucking idea, but I do.”
Ben smacks his lips. There’s more weighing on his crumpled, old, and heavy heart. “Look, I’m sorry for what I said that night too, alright? I would never hurt you, I swear.”
She nods in his hands. “I know. Don’t worry, okay? Sometimes we say things we don’t mean. Doesn’t make them true. You know I’m kinda the queen of that,” she says and offers him a wry smile.
Ben then pulls her to his lips and kisses her – feverishly and fervently. This time, he even dares to slip his tongue inside her mouth, his hands graciously exploring her curves that mold perfectly to his frame. When he generously palms and squeezes her buttcheeks, she breaks from the kiss with a laugh.
“Slow down, Casanova,” she says, giggling, her cheeks blushing and hurting furiously. “Take it easy on me, alright? Baby steps.”
“Not even a little sorry.” He chuckles quite cheekily and reluctantly lets her go but stays close. “So, you quit? What about the deal? What did the bitch say?”
“Well, good things happen when you’re nice to people and actually make friends,” she says with a mischievous smile that’s supposed to hide the lecture. But Ben knows there’s one somewhere in there. “Vicky just wants me to be happy, so she reluctantly let me go because I’m still an awesome Chief of Staff. And granted, she doesn’t necessarily understand why my happiness includes you, but she’s a great friend, so…”
Ben frowns slightly at her words but tries not to take too much offense. His wife is here, and that’s all that counts. But: Fuck that cock-juggling thunder cunt…
“You’re staying? For good now?” he checks, not trusting the peace entirely. When could he ever?
“I’m staying for good,” she confirms, smiling brightly. “Unless you don’t want me t–“
“Oh, shut the fuck up!” He kisses her faster than her mouth can move, hot and rough. As he slowly draws back, his nose brushes hers, and he looks deeply into her eyes. “I’m gonna show you how much I want you tonight.”
“Ben, I told you – baby steps,” she reminds him gently but still giggles when he continues to tease her, beard tickling the spot behind her ear.
“I promise I steer clear of the home runs, but I will make it to third base, my love,” he all but swears and places a wet kiss on her forehead. “Now, let’s get inside before the kid burns the house down…”
Y/N laughs as she takes his hand, sauntering back to their home together as the sun sets behind them.
“Mom, you wanna come to a football game with us tonight?” her son asks as he eagerly shuffles his breakfast into his mouth.
The boy hasn’t left her side since she’s come home last night, even sneaking into their bed to cuddle with her – a little to Ben’s chagrin. But after a few scolding looks from his wife, he relented to sharing the attention.
She swears she has two children sometimes…
“Yeah, I’d love to,” she agrees with a wide smile. Little things like that are all she’s ever wanted.
Ben can tell she’s moved because there are tears stinging her eyes again. He thinks they might be a permanent addition at this point, considering they haven’t disappeared since she came home.
“Just a heads up, though, the football coach is a twink,” Ben informs her and actually believes it’s helpful.
Y/N furrows her brow and tilts her head. “Ben, what–“
“Look, I don’t mean any offense by it. The guy’s… alright,” Ben says and clearly struggles to get the words out. “His plays are good. I even think he can get the team to state this year.”
“Wow, high praise,” she comments and hides an amused smile behind her coffee mug. It might not seem like much, but it’s the most acceptance he’s ever shown someone from the LGBTQ community.
“Oh, yeah, I’m a full ally now.” He grins broadly. “Even the lesbians said so.”
“What lesbians?”
“Alec’s parents,” he replies as if it’s obvious, referring to their son’s best friend in school.
“You never said they were lesbians,” she points out, the wrinkles on her brow deepening.
“Sure, I did.”
“No, you said Alec’s parents were a ‘hot blonde’ and some ‘burly dude.’”
“Yeah.” He shrugs simply. “And the burly dude turned out to be a woman. Took me a while to realize, though. Was hard to find boobs under that flannel…”
“Alright, and I think that is enough grown-up talk around the kid for now,” she says, shaking her head in amusement.
“I don’t mind,” Benny quips from his chair and grins slyly at his parents.
“Uh-huh, keep eating your breakfast,” she says and ruffles his hair as she gets up from her seat by the island next to him.
They spend the whole day together, taking Benny to the batting cage at the park and the food court at the mall before attending a high school football game. As they return home late that night, the kid is so exhausted he falls right into his bed and passes out, and Ben hopes to God he goddamn stays there for the rest of the night.
He has great plans for his wife tonight.
“Alone at last,” Y/N says as she slings her arms around his neck and kisses him deeply as she sways in his embrace in the living room, his large hands resting perfeclty on her hips.
“You can say that again,” Ben huffs, but there’s amusement in his voice.
“Still want ten kids?” she teases. His brow raises comically at her words, making her giggle.
“Maybe three are enough,” he admits. Before, he never thought kids could be that much work. He also thought he wouldn’t be as involved in… well, raising them. “Or two. Maybe just one more…”
She laughs, throwing her head back. “Yeah, two sounds nice.”
“Wanna get working on one right now?” Ben suggests with his best flirty smile and a wag of his brows but can quickly see her reluctance and cups her cheeks, lifting her gaze to him. “We’ll go as slow as you need to, alright? But I believe in you. I know you got this shit under control.”
For a heartbeat, she licks her lips in contemplation, and Ben already thinks it’s a lost cause, but then she actually nods.
“Okay,” she agrees and stretches on tiptoes to tentatively catch his upper lip between her soft, plush pillows. Her fingers crawl up his jaw, card through his beard. “But you’re gonna have to let me be in control if you don’t want me to kill you.”
Ben only entertains it with a cheeky smile. “Well, might be fun for a change,” he says and lifts her back to his lips with a finger under her chin.
He takes her hand and leads her to the bedroom. He only turns on the small lamp by his bedside before his ravening eyes turn their full attention back to her. He marvels at her beauty in the soft, warm glow for a moment before lifting the t-shirt over her head and tossing it aside.
He kisses down the column of her throat, teeth biting skin and soothing it with his tongue as he works his way inside her bra. A hunger is spreading inside of him at her taste, her smell, her noises. He tries to tame it as best as he can on her behalf, but it’s fucking hard. He’s fucking hard.
She hums, moans the further he travels, the rougher he gets as he devours every free inch of her body. He tests the waters, sees where he can bite. Her skin is more durable now. Ben still remembers the feeling – the numbness.
Her fingers jitter nervously as they fumble with his belt buckle and zipper. Ben thinks it’s cute. He’s never seen her like this before. He’s almost sad he doesn’t have super-hearing anymore to listen to the wild beats of her heart.
But he wouldn’t trade what he’s feeling right now for the world. He has almost forgotten what it all felt like before the blue poison made him so indifferent and callous. He never thought he’d wish her to be human. And not out of petty, jealousy, or selfishness – out of love.
Ben wants her to feel exactly what he feels and knows she fucking can’t right now.
The rest of their clothes land in a pile on the floor as they peel off each item, carefully working their way to bare skin. Ben’s fingers almost twitch from holding back – he’d love to tear and rip it all off. Baby steps.
When she’s left only in a pair of delicate lace panties, she gently pushes against his chest, forcing him to sit down on the edge of the bed.
Ben can’t lie and say he isn’t a little nervous, too, rubbing his palms along his thick thighs in anticipation. She’s stronger than him now, which makes his heart flutter slightly. He feels a bit like he’s playing with matches, trying to set himself on fire.
Was this how his human lovers always felt when he was still Soldier Boy?
Little scary…
She straddles his thighs and takes a seat in his lap, teeth biting her bottom lip back and hiding half of the smile that graces her lips. Her hips rock against the achingly straining bulge in his boxers.
Ben’s been as hard as tungsten since she’s kissed him last night. Forty years imprisonment haven’t cost him this much restraint as one year without touching his wife, who was practically right underneath his nose the whole time. He figures it was the sheer temptation that constantly triggered his need for her. The Russians never were that fucking pretty.
She sucks the skin on his throat purple and blue and leaves bite marks behind. Ben knows she loves staking her claim on him, and he always enjoys inspecting her little art projects in the mornings. He’s gladly hers as much as she is his.
His massive hands wander her curves, squeeze taut flesh and perfectly frame her perky tits. Her skin feels smooth and soft and warm, hot even. Too hot…
“You’re hot,” he murmurs breathlessly against her lips.
She doesn’t understand what he means and smiles, although her brow furrows slightly as if she found the question at least a little odd. He was usually more direct, more racy. “Thank you. So are you?”
She tries to kiss him again, but he pulls back, his hands grabbing her upper arms and holding her at a distant as he inspects her closely. His brow knits deeper and deeper as he cups her scorching cheeks before his palm slides to her forehead.
“No…” He shakes his head, worry stirring his blood. His heartbeat accelerates, but not for the purpose he expected it to. “You’re burning up.”
As Ben looks closer at her face, he sees how pale she is, how hazy her eyes are. He worries more.
“I do feel a little warm, I guess,” she admits and then forces a weak smile. He could’ve almost mistaken it for lust. “But I’m fine, okay? Probably just nerves.”
Ben would love nothing more than to believe that, but he can’t. Something’s wrong. But it’s his job as her husband to not make her worry and take care of her.
“How about we postpone this to tomorrow, huh, my love?” Ben suggests and gently cards his hands through her hair.
“You sure?” She is surprised, considering how adamant and persistent he’s been to get her here. But she honestly feels too exhausted to argue for long.
“Yeah, I’m sure,” he says and lovingly pecks her temple. “Just get some rest, okay? It’s been a lot for you those past two days.”
Ben helps her gently into bed, ensures the blanket covers her thoroughly, and places a goodnight kiss to her hairline. She’s fast asleep by the time he leaves the bedroom.
His smile fades, though, once he’s out of view. He knows better than anyone Y/N shouldn’t be feeling sick. She’s a supe, so he knows something is off – and it’s more than nerves and exhaustion.
And then, fear sets in.
Part 2: Lovesick – TOMORROW 💕
*coughs a little angst* We might have a teeny-tiny virus going around... 👀
What did you guys think of this part? Did you expect him to postpone sexy times? Someone finally give that man his fucking Rolex for those heroics 😂🫶
🩵 Tag List☕️ Ko-Fi💭 Talk Dirty to Me
TAGS:
Forevers: @alwaystiredandconfused @lyarr24 @supernotnatural2005 @deans-spinster-witch @blackcherrywhiskey
@deansbbyx @foxyjwls007 @ladysparkles78 @roseblue373 @zepskies
@agalliasi @yvonneeeee @hobby27 @iamsapphine @globetrotter28
@mxltifxnd0m @lacilou @feyresqueen @suckitands33 @onlyangel-444
@syrma-sensei @perpetualabsurdity @deans-baby-momma @yoobusgoobus @jessjad
@hunter-or-the-hunted @k-slla @just-levyy @mrsjenniferwinchester @illicithallways
@muhahaha303 @ultimatecin73 @nancymcl @leigh70 @brightlilith
@nesnejwritings @samslvrgirl @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @fromcaintodean @barewithme02
@thebiggerbear @star-yawnznn @thej2report @misatxox @spnaquakindgdom
@americanvenom13 @lamentationsofalonelypotato
Soldier Boy: @deans-baby-momma @snowayumi
Rehab Series: @nancymcl @sparkydonugh
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trend I hate so so so much
its such a pet peeve bc like in the musical they are trying to act and get the emotiona across and tell a story but in the soundtrack they just want to make it sound "good" so the vocals have like no emotion in them and ahhh its so boring I hate it
#weird ass rambling#does this make any sense?#probably not but oh well#musicals#I'm looking at YOU six the musical all you want to do is so cool in live recordings#and you can hear her slowly breaking down#and at the end with the gasp its so good#and then in the soundtrack it just sounds like all the other courses!!#there is like no emotion!!!#ahhhh#idk what this is either#musical theater#broadway#musical theatre
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I had to open the ship combat rules doc I made for Rook's campaign the other day, and man, that thing was (and still is tbh) my fucking magnum opus. I put so much effort into creating rules for a type of combat that dnd doesn't naturally support, and it was SUCH a fun challenge. I'll admit it's not perfect, but it works for our campaign, and everyone seemed to like it during our one test so far, so that's good enough for me.
I think between the stat blocks, the rules themselves, and the maps of the ships, I spent easily 48 hours total on making this sailing arc happen. (No, I'm not the DM, I just like homebrewing shit, and also happen to be the one who decided to play a pirate and make that involved in the story.)
#morrigan.text#morrigan plays dnd#dnd#if anyone wants to read the ship combat rules doc or anything just lmk. I will gladly share the link. This thing is my baby.#actually if anyone ever wants to see ANY of my dnd stuff I'll gladly share. I need to find a nicer way to share it than roll20 screenshots.#I will accept any suggestions as to how to do that and also gladly welcome any chance to infodump about my silly little homebrew shit.#it's so funny because I think that a lot of people would look at the stuff I do for this DM and go ''huh??? why??? you're a player???''#and yet MORE that I've promised to make but haven't done yet. (Like the fucked up Nightwalkers I'm using the Aeor monsters as a base for.)#but it's genuinely so much fun for me and I practically BEG him to let me do this stuff lmao.#I've made SEVERAL maps (both battle and regional) and well over a dozen stat blocks for this campaign.#probably close to two dozen atp actually. I mean the Sea Snake crew alone was at least 4 stat blocks plus the 3 ships.#and then there's the Drowned Maidens we're fighting next session. And the Tentacle Monster and the Sea Drake.#and the beefed-up Kuo-Toa plus their idol and the Marriages.#so what's that. 13 stat blocks for just the first part of the sailing arc?#and then there's the wind roc/phoenix thing I made for Red Lotus Island.#and three chimeras I made for the labs. So that's 17. And I know for a fact there's more I'm forgetting about.#my all-caster party is going to hate me lmao. (It's fine. 90% of the monsters I make are worse for me (the rogue) than anyone else.)#as for maps I made the map of Red Lotus island and I made all three ship maps (which took probably close to 24hours total)#and I made a map for the fight against Andrassi THE NIGHT BEFORE THE SESSION (by voluntary choice).#idk I just have fun with this kind of thing. I'm not organized enough to DM a campaign but I love figuring out technical challenges.#I mean. that makes a lot of sense since dnd and its mechanics is literally my special interest. So. Not really surprising.#oh and for my (heavily modified) CoS game I made a super powerful divine assassin of the Raven Queen for us to meet.#he's cool as hell. His name is Kazimir and his stat block is absolutely insane.#it's almost 3am why am I like this. time to go the fuck to sleep!!!
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imagine a double date, suguru with reader and satoru with sukuna (it was all satoru's idea, sukuna and suguru are confused af and reader is just vibing)
AHHHHHHH YOU GET IT ANON (i have something similar to this in the works 🤭🤭🤭 it’s a silly lil roadtrip)
but this idea is so funny bc satoru is like guys let’s go on a double date :D and suguru is like… who are YOU gonna bring anyways you’re not dating anybody… cut to sukuna already sitting at the restaurant smirking at suguru 😭 satoru is footing the whole bill so that’s why sukie was like yeah idgaf i’ll join and he makes sure to sit next to reader to annoy BOTH suguru and satoru 🤭🤭🤭 sukuna: hey, try some of this pasta it’s delicious *he feeds reader w his fork while side eye smirking satosugu* meanwhile suguru’s eye is twitching out of anger and satoru’s **** is twitching bc he’s a cuck WHO SAID THAT……………….. ahem . back 2 the idea though!
i love that the consensus is that reader is just vibing and happy to be there bc that really is so them 😭 just unbothered and sexy <333 (sukie deffo out loud calls the desserts shitty btw he’s like my desserts are way better) and satoru is like ahahaha yeahhhh they areeeee ^.^ (he’s trying to get into sukuna’s pants) and suguru is just like… mentally telling sukuna to kill himself while also being really doting and romantic to reader (suguru & sukuna both dote on them and they’re both trying to get a rise out of the other one, moreso sukuna than suguru) and JEJDJDJDJ honestly at the end of the dinner satoru probably would proposition a foursome idk he just would
#asks#anon#sukuna agrees and is like yea sure idgaf i have nothing better to do#meanwhile suguru is carrying reader like a purse out of the establishment#(i have a foursome fic w them in the works shhhhhhhh)#idk i just think. reader & satoru getting railed would be cute <333#sukie tries to get a rise out of suguru and then sukuna finds himself getting absolutely DESTROYED by suguru :3#HARD/SOFT DOM SUGURU X BRATTY SWITCH SUKUNA X BRATTY SUB SATORU X SWEET SUB READER MY BELOVEDS <333#i just had a vision of reader & satoru on the bed next to each other making out while suguru fucks reader & sukuna fucks satoru#((will sukuna & reader make out idk maybe)) (((will suguru and sukuna make out idk maybe))) ((((satosugu are def making out))))#AGAIN THIS ONE WILL BE. AN OUTLIER. IT WON’T BE CANON!!!!! i truly don’t think suguru would share reader at ALL#BUTTTTTTT I DO HAVE A SEX FIC!!!!! IN THE WORKS B/T SUGURU & READER!!!!!!#idk if anyone rmbrs but in black is the color reader & suguru said a ‘sit on my face’ pick up like#welp. the aftermath will ensue. (suguru sits on reader’s face)#hehehehehehehe#i’m all over the place is this how one minute in my brain is legitimately like#random ideas and tangents that don’t make any sense 😭😭😭 BUT OH WELL :3
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ARCANE EPISODE 7!!!!
MY GOD I WASNT READY FOR ANY OF THIS!!! WHAT WAS THAT!!!
Also ekko wallpaper I got with my fries lmao
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#OH MY GOOOD!!!!!! POWDER AND EKKO!!! AND BENZOOOOOO#ITS LITERALLY WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN OMGG!!!!! POWDER LOOKS SO CUTE 😭😭😭😭 IM CRYING ALREADYYYY#VANDER WITH A BUN!! AND EVERYTHING IS SO FULL OF LIGHT!!! HER EYES!!! MYLO LOOKS SO RIDICULOUS AKDJSK THIS GIRLAAA#“where would you be without her” WELL BUDDY IF YOU KNEW HOW HE IS WITH HER!!! VI IS DEAD????? OR SHE WAS TAKEN FOR THE INCIDENT!!!#LOOK AT WHAT YOU DID JAYCE!!! MY GOD!!! THE GEMS KILLED VI SO THEY JUST COMPLETELY PROHIBITED THEM!!! JAYCE IS IN JAIL PROBABLY!!#the fact we are seeing exactly why jayce should be sorry about what he has done.... and we are seeing him suffer because of it... cinema 🚬#also mel fading into viktor.... also has he realised how she manipulated him in the beggining??? there is so much stuff...#jayce eating contaminated animals and his wound being infected with the arcane too..... is that what will push him....#omg.... ekko likes powder so much... he apologised by painting actual adult vi portraits where the fallen are in his universe 😭😭😭#“she looks so badass” if you knew... is he gonna ask her to help him make hextech.... that is so sick and twisted....#also jayce hurting his leg loke viktor and having to use a cane and brace.... damn and you know whats worse..... that ekko could be like#this with the jinx of his universe IF ISHA HADNT DIED!!! AND IT IS BEACUSE OF JAYCE!! AGAIN!!!!! THIS MAN!!!!!#the drawing with the anomaly and the two men and the inifite symbol... we get it... jayce and viktor forever intertwined by fate....#powder is sensing something is off.... omg time travel..... THE LIMIT IS FOUR SECONDS AFTER HEIMERDINGER EPXLODED ALDHAKSHSKSJSOJSOSLS#i dont want a time travel ending.... if its done for plot to an extent is okay but idk about solving it all.... it makes it feel worhtless#claggor looks so fine its not even funny..... i cant wait to see what everyone thinks. WHERE IS THE LITTLE LADY bc hes called little man 😭#and vander with arm tattoos.... why did they hipster fied him.... he looks younger somehow ajdhakj he went from taking care of 4 kids to 3!#SILCO!!!! AND HE DID TRY TO KILL HIM!! ALSJAKSKAK Ekko just laighing at it.... girl i would be pissed STROMAE??? OMG POWDER!!!!#I JUST REALIZED THE PINK IN HER HAIR IS FOR VI!! AND HER JACKET!! AND A DRESS LIKE HER MOTHER'S!! CRYING!!! FULL BODY CHILLS!!!#CAN WE JUST PRETEND LIKE ITS THE FIRST TIME!!! I GAVE UP ON YOU!!! WHAT HAPPENED BACK THEN I NEED TO KNOW!!! IM SOBBING!!! EKKO!!!!#NOOOOOOO THE ANOMALY NOOOOO!!!! HEIMERDINGER NOOOOO!!!! AND THATS JAYCE!!! IS THAT MAGE VIKTOR???? the monkeys......#the vi toy with the out love song machine.... my god i wasnt expecting any of this i need to breathe i am stil tearing up my god#what a fucking punch in the stomach christ i cant breathe right akdhsksso#the credits saying the deries has benefited from a spanish tax rebate in the canary islands??? you're welcome i guess lmao#animation production carried out there and has ben collaboration with the Spanish gov... alright another win for perro sanxe#talking tag#watching arcane#watching arcane season 2#watching this i dont think im ready for caitvi sex.... after reconciliation even like what will be of me.... now im scared#i am still scared bc idk what happened to jinx and vi and cait still... thats what worried me and boom!! ekko powder with the steel chair..
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/294730157ba9dedfab297de15e9b7613/4befc729116450a3-20/s540x810/0562295f63e6bf2587eb90784cdf143fafc5de44.jpg)
next up in my revamped kj designs: jet star!! 💫
she is so important to me… the space puppy tattoo is partially because of @eggbagelz’ headcanon which i saw and thought “oh definitely jet would LOVE laika” and the design is (with permission) one of my lovely friend @andpierres’ tattoo flash designs and tattoo tickets are available on his kofi if YOU would like to have a space puppy tattoo on your own skin! :)
as with the last two posts, untextured version under the cut for cleaner details and accurate colors!
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#danger days#jet star#ttlotfk#killjoys california#jetty jetty jetty#jet has the most updated design technically because i went from headcanoning them as transmasc to transfem!#i have birthday and therefore astrology hcs for ALL the fab four btw if you’re interested#ghoul also has his sign’s constellation tattooed on him i think maybe jet and ghoul got those done to be loosely matching :) family#THANK YOU NICO FOR LETTING ME USE YOUR DESIGN!!#felt appropriate for jet not only because of the space theming but also because i know you like jet a lot :) and i like how you draw them#so. i kind of associate jet with you#and again: no jacket because i wanted y’all to see her tatts but unlike kobra’s jacket#i would probably make at least a FEW tweaks jet’s jacket makes the least sense to me. leather AND denim? i THINK? and there’s a weird symbol#on it? and an epaulette? idk man it’s interesting but i would probably do it differently#god fucking damn it the gun is a little too short probably. to make sense from a top angle. OH WELL. i’m not going back and changing that#too much work#also i spent literally five or six hours just on her hair please clap#if i’ve said anything about jet’s tattoos in the past ignore that i don’t remember any of what i said if that’s the case#NEW hcs now.
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imagine being a child who, along with your siblings, is exploited by the adults in your life since you're 5 years old. and then when you grow up, those older siblings turn around and exploit you too. no wonder he felt so alone. family was so important to him, it was all he had for so long, but THAT'S his family. at the end of the day, if there was enough money in it for them, they'd use him again and again
#when he so sincerely said in that interview in like. 1983. at 24 years old. 'i'm just learning about things like friendship...'#oh my god what did they do to this kid#and maybe he exaggerated that a little but i don't think he was lying about how lonely he felt#idk the family including michael always stressed that they were all very close#so i don't wanna dispute that too much it's just. idk. i don't see that#i see closeness here and there in different time periods#but i don't get the feeling that they were that close in the way that michael wanted to be close to people. in an emotional way#his relationships with his sisters make sense to me. yknow how there are 'girl dads?' michael was a girl brother#which LOL i don't mean that in any kinda Way other than i sense that he had more of an affinity for his sisters than brothers#well anyways#i have siblings i'm very close to. i can't imagine family being all i had and not even being that close#and i imagine in the 80s he'd have some mixed feelings#like if they're all you have you wanna hold on but if they suck and they're bad for you and using you then you HAVE to separate yourself#which is really hard#not to mention the parents#wugh. many thoughts about the jacksons#oh this post was prompted by the victory tour mess
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What's with all the "Them and Us" stuff I mean. I thought the whole point of this acceptance stuff is realising that despite all the little differences everyone is still kind of similar in the way that they should be granted at least the basic but of respect everyone deserves? Call me naïve and childish but isn't the point of all this to Not have the clear distinction between people who are slightly different? Isn't the whole point to Not have a "Them" and an "Us"?
#been doing a lot of national socialism in history again and idk#something about the goebbels speeches man#i know i know insane comparison but there everything also started with establishing a ''Them'' against a ''We''#that was like half of the ideology you know?#and I don't like seeing stuff like that these days because it's so stupid and actually seems more harmful in the long run#if thid makes sense#now you feel good because you have your bubble of other...idk. socially acceptable level of mentally ill people for example#and you're in this community with people who understand you so obviously you don't want to leave#and thats fine#i just always think it's a bit stranhe when it starts sounding like... you know#there's a lot of memes juxtaposing a very specific symptom of a disorder or something with just ''non mentally ill people'' for example#and I get it its a silly little joke#but words do something and if it's this ''oh they'll never understand they're just not X enough'' it just#i really really can't explain it well but it just rubs me the wrong way#is this silly?#it feels a little silly#maybe I just have too much Nazi ideology in my head but it's this pattern of infighting and the growing comfort with being rude or outright#mean online and the splintering in more and more groups with little sub groups and nobody actually seems to take a step back and look at the#larger picture#because they're all content in their little groups of people who are exactly like them#I'm not even saying I'm exempt from this who knows maybe I am also like that#but I don't really like half the people i see every day and I always feel a little like i don't fit in because with most of them I don't#but I don't really think thats a bad thing because how boring would it be to be surrounded by people who think just like i do#nothing new can come of that after a while no?#I'm sleepy i don't know if I make any sense but I've just been marinating on it a tad...
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just wasted so much time going through that article thats like “1000 books you may have actually read” that gets passed around on here every once in a while and um. the list kinda sucks
#like i know 1000 books is a lot and there’s bound to be some that anyone looking through it would side eye#however. there should not be one malcom gladwell book in there let alone several#like imo those lists at least give the impression that they’re more literature geared so in that case there shouldn’t be any self help#books in there at all. and few ‘airport books’ a la colleen hoover#like one colleen hoover book is like okay whatever. she’s popular. but there should not be that many#also not one poetry book in sight (besides shel silversteen which i’m only kind of counting bc we all read his books as children)#children’s lit is fine imo. you aren’t likely to have read much else on these lists if you didn’t read as a child. it’s different#it’s also fun to check off books you loved as a child in these kinds of lists! it’s like oh hey that’s my friend i know him!!#also like. you’re not gonna put anything by shirley jackson or joyce carol oates in there??? toni morrison? mary oliver?? octavia butler??#HELLO this list sucks#sorry for sounding like a pretentious asshole but unfortunately i have a degree and a half on this shit so. i AM a pretentious asshole#sometimes at the very least#anyway maybe i’ll make my OWN list of 1000 books you may have read (already acknowledging that i will most definitely not have read#everything i put on there!!!) okay sorry i’ll shut up i need to go to bed#btw my score on that list was something like 83 and i consider myself a fairly well read person and am like. always looking to improve upon#my personal scope of the world through reading. idk if that makes sense but i think it does okay goodNIGHT
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Pls info dump about your system. I saw in your tag that you want to so consider this a free pass to do so I want to know all that ya want to share
HI!!!! SORRY YOUSENT THIS LIEK A WEEK AGO WE WERE WAITING 4 WHEN WE JAD ENOUGH ENERGY 2 INFODUMP JSISJDJFFNDJD OK OK UNDER THE CUT
WE ACTUALLY. ... DONT KNOW WEHRE 2 start Uhhhmmmm. hmmmm. OH MAYBE THE HEADSPACE!
ok SO the headspace changes DRASTICALLY like every few months or few weeks or so. Just a week ago it was a copy of the house we currently live in. We like,,, grew up in this house so it was Also our headspace for years as a kid and we had the vibe tht it was. The exact headspace frlm back then too bUT WE never did get to find out bc it changed AGAIN like a few days ago. smh. Now i think we're just above & outside of The Cave™™™™™ tht was discovered here earlier this year. WHICH IS REALLY FUCKING COOL! BECAUSE THAT MEANS:
The headspace survived the nuclear winter!!*
HOYL SHIT WE'RE IN THE MAIN HEADSPACE AGAIN LET'S GOOOOO <= has been stuck in Harry's headspace for the past half yearIEJFKDKFMC
[*Sometimes it just fucking gets Destroyed. Like... Semi permanently. As in, if it gets destroyed there is Very Little Chance we'll see that variation of our headspace AgainFHDJDKFKFJ and last we uhhjj Talked to anyone in the Main System, bc we are... TECHNICALLY A SUBSYSTEM! FJDJFJ, they were like Yeah no everything is fucking Destroyed <3. But that's not the case snymore ig???????]
SO w all this information actually if we rlly wanted we could probably make a decent map of the area. cuz if We jave this headspace back then we have Everythingggg it had in it back too & everything that it was connected to THAT'S NEAT WE MIGHT DO THAT!!
uhhjjj waht else. HMMM. i thuink our current front roster is neat TBH there's some guys active rn that we'd have never expected. like HI PHYS! WYD WHY R U HERE RN <3 QJAIWOSKSKDNCXN but it's fun !!!! i hope everyone innn our subsystem will fromt here at lEast once bc I Am Lov Collecting Informatión On Everyone <= Primarily fills out everyone's PK & Simply Plural descriptions. actually I think maybe everyone has fronted a sufficiently long enough time EXCEPT FOR HAND/EYE LIKE S I R GET YOUR ASS UP HERE TELL ME ABT YOURSELF BASTARD !! GJCJCKCKF all ik abt him is that He enjoys making Pokeblocks On Pokefarm. that is IT and that's NOT ENOUGH INFORMATION MY GUY but anyways.
i also think us Existing Here is so funny in itself like our asses rlly just got Possibly permanently isekai'd huh. like. like. Genuinely I don't know if our past mains r coming back at this point but that's FINE we already did the whole 96 stages of grief shit about it IF that be the case then SO be it Whatever there's pros to this life ig. like THIS body isn't on the verge of SUDDENLY DYING FOR NO REASON and also We have a cat. we have a cat!!!!! and a dog!!!!!! whaddahell!!!!!!!
there's lotsa fun shit here But there r also the Horrors. Like I PERSONALLY WOULD LOOVE TO EXIST with Out the Constant Paranoia And Delusions but IT *IS* PREFERABLE! OVER WHSTEVER THE FUCK WAS WRONG WITH HARRY <3 AJSJDJF
I will say tho. When we uhhhhhhh All popped in & all we Just assumed we'd be Gone & dormant MONTHS AGO but ummmm . well. apparently not! sO the things we wanted 2 Experience have a High probability Of Happening,! Like PT is excited for Halloween and UNLESS those pirate fucks completely take over the roster within the next like week [0f.md s2 on the 5th babey!!! holy shit!!] then it's. Probably gonna happwn!!! which is so cool we don't actually... hey did Halloween exist in (source game)
man and speaking of. Memories Of The Past as we call source memories. It's a collective sys-wide trait thing All our fictives from aNY source rlly enjoy piecing together what they remember from their canons & all It's like enrichment for us. BUT we've been kinda piecing together a rough timeline of when We all formed in our canon That's our biggest Thought Project™ rn. No estimated time 4 when it'll be Complete tho probs never tbh. and w that in mind u may or may not believe who harry's first sysmate was According 2 what we've put togetherJTJEDKFKDJS
ok that's liek 5 trillion words Whoops. we r so talkatives <3 I am going to stop there it's like 5 am JFJDDKCKF we gotta go back to bedddd -E-Chem
#ask#THANK U 4 THE INFODUMPING OPPORTUNITY if u have any more questions. bls feel free 2 ask#We Lov Talking. Abt Ourselves. JWNDFJCNSKFNFKSF#*According to The Timeline/Our Canon harry's first headmate was HL. which is so funny 2 me that guy is like 12#but also ig it makes sense. idk.#me‚ one of the newer bastards in Harry's system: *points at HL* that thing is my baby brother#HL: *is literally older than all of us formation date wise*#HMM. our brain is telling me we r Cringe....... oh well! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ *beats our brain with hammers*#actually 1 more thing#Inland formed first in this body's system . like.. holy shit could you imagine if they became the body's signature skill . fucked up [JOKE]
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one of my new coworkers so delicately straddles the line between "pretentious" and "deeply interesting/cool" and I'm very curious if he will STAY on that line and not fall off into one end or the other
#I think ''pretentious'' is unfair to him honestly because like...#he will freely pass judgement on things but he hasn't done it to people (in my presence)#and he also enjoys simple things at times too so it doesn't feel in any way performative#but parts of him DO feel curated#he was standing outside at our post-work gathering in his dark sunglasses and his well-fitting black coat and I was like: oh he ✨styled✨thi#and I think a curatorial spirit that is very strong in its identity and that has found its niche can initially come off as ''pretentious''#simpy because it... asserts itself so strongly?#but he's kind and works *very* hard (too hard) and he clearly has passions and this work is within his passions so...#it all makes sense. anyways he's technically a manager (not mine) so idk how deep I can make a friend out of him#but I'm curious if I can manage it. I'm (honestly) not convinced I'm cool enough lol#he goes to ART SALONS where a bunch of local art professionals and DOCTORS watch old films???#idk stuff that would make you go ''okay tryhard'' but he like. genuinely enjoys it idk that's his personality#he was coping with this very stressful week by trying to do a rubik's cube today lol poor guy
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one thing i think one piece fans forget is that for most of the characters in it having the d initial doesn’t mean anything. we don’t find out it’s anything to think about until skypiea while robin is talking to gan fall (who met roger) and he says “d.? i see. one letter of his name… that can’t just be a coincidence!!!” and laughs. we only know what we do bc luffy’s the main character. i guess you could argue kureha saying roger’s name is gol d. roger at the end of drum counts but it’s brushed off and you’re not like. encouraged to think about why it’s different. she only knows this bc she’s a REALLY old lady who was around when roger first set out. and gan fall met roger. law knows about it from cora, Who Used To Be A Celestial Dragon. nobody who knows about it is a normal citizen. the world government wants it to be a secret. they successfully wiped out 100 years of history. “the will of d.” or those “eat like a d.” jokes are NOT something everyone is making!!! GUYS. WE ONLY KNOW BECAUSE WE’RE THE VIEWERS. WE’RE WATCHING THE MOST POWERFUL PEOPLE IN THE WORLD RIGHT NOW. NOT EVERYONE WILL KNOW WHAT THEY DO!!!!
#this counts for g5 too. nika doesn’t seem to be a well known figure since that one guy (forgot his name.) that was fighting jimbei and#mentioned him was part of cipher pol (forgot. which faction or whatever) and Had The Fruit#maybe fishman island knows about him! but i don’t think your average citizen (or pirate or marine for that matter) would know!#idk. maybe nika wasn’t part of oda’s plan until late so he couldn’t add in details about him earlier and people DO know about him#but when writing in a character’s pov you Have to consider what they would know and ESPECIALLY at that point in time for a series like this#one piece#also also. i might be wrong on this i have a shitty memory but as far as we know ace didn’t know ANYTHING.#and it may have been mentioned to luffy before but like. it’s luffy. he doesn’t care or he just straight up forgot#i’m not sure any of the strawhats except for robin and maybe jimbei know anything#(again. shitty memory. i had a head injury. i might be 100% wrong on this)#also! with cora it was like. oh the will of d is the enemy of the gods or smth so like. it was told to him to scare him.#d’s are only a scary bedtime story to celestial dragons#in this story we are meeting significant people who know things. they are not the norm.#a lot of citizens eat up navy propaganda like it’s soup. not all bc we meet some and the revs probably help the rest#idk compare it to the real world. i’m way off topic but i’m not deleting any of these. or readinf over them to make sure rhey make sense.#i’m on like 4 hours of sleep enjoy. whatever this is.#i should probably make a tag for my rants like this#but i’ve been thinking about changing my username (it’s a song from my nami playlist rn) and idk what else i’d want to be called
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I should get a Rika keychain <- Guy who hasn't read past the first arc of Higurashi yet
#I have Every Sigle spoiler I could possibly have though and I am. Obsessed. with Saikoroshi#I also just looked at my keychain and thought she would look really cute with the pixel artstyle from the friend who made my current one#idk if I'd get anyone from umi in that style even if it would make more sense oh maybe zepar and furfur lol I like'em could be double sided#and also I was already thinking of commissioning her with Someone from ze Probably Akane but I haven't put any real thought into it#The specific thought of Rika keychain really just popped into my head I spent so long talking about her to my roomie tuesday#oh well that and every other hyperfixation of mine really I kid you not it was a full bingo I just did not shut up at all that day#we also talked about childhood stuff at some point and both cried because of the power of friendship but that's besides the point#all that while drinking pink lemonade soda on the kitchen counter lol#Void fala aí
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