#idk i just got home from work and im exhausted i might not be making sense
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motthe · 1 month ago
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hiii !! just read like ,, a BUNCH of ur lumen au stuff ,,,, truly i am brainrotted now because i'm just thinking of so many different scenarios involving the lumens and i am just . EXCITED !!! its SUCHHHH a good concept im a big big sucker for soulmate stuff ,,,,
i was just wondering how you feel about jayvik x reader ,,,, TWO lumens ,,,,,,,, idk if you write for anything poly or not, but id love to hear your thoughts on it !!! either through headcanons or a ficlet, whichever you feel like :]
my first viktor x reader x jayce piece i’ve ever written… wait is this my first poly drabble?? it might be actually! i hope it’s fun to read ♥️
warnings: fem!reader, slight negative feelings of not being good enough, but overall fluff!!!
The scientific jargon that came with having not one but both of your fated being inventors was overwhelming. The words they tossed around became an entire other language since you’d all gotten closer. It left you feeling unbearably empty-headed, wondering why the universe would bond you to such intelligent men.
They were already changing an entire city with their ideas, and you would bet the world would soon bear their mark as well. In comparison, you were a meager artist making ends meet at festivals and street corners. Sure, maybe your work could be seen on a few shop signs or covering a wall or two in a cafe, but that was as famous as you’d ever be—a stranger to the passing eye.
“We need to widen the cylindrical chamber, maybe add an exhaust pipe to help with the cooldown.”
Jayce’s voice slipped through your head, smooth and confident and making no sense. You’d gotten rather good and tuning out the meat of the conversations, only recognizing the tones and emotions.
The heavy, warm accent of Viktor’s replied, swirling in the back of your mind as your pencil swiped over the heavy parchment against your thighs.
Recently, they’d begun inviting you to their lab to spend your free time in their company. There were two desks to choose from, though they were usually piled high with blueprints or notes. Jayce had moved a couch into the space for your comfort, placed in the corner and under a window, well away from any dangerous work they had their hands on, though they usually took anything too precarious into another portion of the building.
Their assistant, Sky, was in and out, always double-checking if you needed anything. She was a kind young woman, curly hair and glasses and a smile that made anyone feel at home. She brought you your own coffee and snacks, promising it was no trouble since she was already bringing them to Viktor and Jayce, anyway.
“You actually eat them,” she chuckled. “Jayce will if he notices they’re there, but it’s a long shot most days.”
You understood what she meant, seeing how focused the men became on their gadgets and studies. You’re sure if you got up and left they wouldn’t notice for a good, long while.
Today was one of those days, though there was peace in your private little corner as you sketched away. You squinted over the top of your sketchbook, skimming the outline of Viktor’s goggles pressed into his thick, winding hair and quickly adding the little licks of tresses to the paper before he was moving again.
You switched targets, taking in Jayce’s side profile and adding a bit more depth to his eyebrow and under eye.
Taking a moment to look between both drawings, you were hit with their beauty once more.
Jayce was deemed the academy’s “pretty boy,” with his strong jaw and perfect smile. He was a clean cut handsome, peak health and built with broad shoulders. He knew how to use those looks to his advantage.
On the other end was Viktor. He was a haunting beauty, sleek and angular. If he had the same charisma with speaking to the masses as Jayce did, that accent would gain him more than a fair share of admirers, but his confidence and skills lied elsewhere. He had a sharp eye and wore his emotions rather loudly on his face.
Where Jayce had faint lines from how much he smiled, Viktor had a feather soft crease between his brows from how often he furrowed them. Where the golden boy’s hands were always warm, his partner’s was cold. They made such gorgeous opposites, yet they held so many comparisons in mannerisms when it came to their shared hobbies and passions.
It was safe to say you adored them and their intricacies.
Taking a slow, deep breath you checked both shoulders before moving the tuft of black in your periphery into your hand. Gold shimmered between the dark mass that made up Jayce’s lumen, settling deeper into your palm as you raised your arms and stretched.
When you moved your drawing pad to the side, you spotted Viktor’s wedged between the apex of your thighs. Swallowing your gasp, you scooped it up, praying it hadn’t been smushed the entire time.
“When did you get there?” you whispered, rubbing your pointer finger into the tawny fuzz of his light. His lumen had always had a bit more give to it, leaving it to wedge itself under your leg or your shirt collar. Viktor’s preferred to be as close as possible to you, even if it left his lumen squished.
Jayce’s lumen was firmer, still soft but in a velveteen sort of sensation. It was bigger, taking up a good portion of your palm. Now your second month with it, you’d learned if it wasn’t on one of your shoulders, it was likely circling your head. His never went far either.
You wondered if you’d received Jayce’s lumen first, if it would have more of an attachment to you. As it stood, you’d had Viktor’s since you were young while he’d held Jayce’s and Jayce yours. The three of you being tied together had become quite the story as there went many outward poly fateds in Piltover, but luckily the gawking had passed after the first handful of weeks.
It was only a few days ago that Viktor confessed he’d been rather confused when he’d met Jayce and the lumens had flashed against one another.
“There were no similarities,” he’d explained, holding up one long, thin finger for your lumen to rest on as it hovered in front of him. The three of you were cozied up in your lackluster apartment—a studio more than a bedroom but it had a nice pullout couch and plenty of blankets to rest on in front of your heater. “Jayce was ecstatic, of course, but I was ruminating over your lumen when we first met.”
“I thought he hated me,” Jayce had murmured, breath warm against your ear as you laughed.
“I did not hate you,” huffed Viktor on your other side, rolling his eyes as he dropped his hand, your lumen resting within. “I wasn’t aware we had a third, yet—it was puzzling.”
“I had to explain it to him,” Jayce chuckled. “One of my old friends was in a poly.”
“And, then, he was even more ecstatic,” Viktor sighed but there was affection in it. “I thought you’d follow him home some nights.”
“And leave you all by yourself?” You laid your head on his shoulder, grinning as his eyes fled. It was still so early into the relationship, and he grew flustered with physical affection whereas Jayce sought it every chance. “I’d never.”
“It’s better now, we’re all together,” Jayce hummed, lowering to lay his head in your lap. You brushed your hand through his hair, smiling as his lumen lit up in Viktor’s lap.
“Yes,” Viktor had agreed, careful as he laid his head against yours. “It all feels…complete.”
Your chest warmed at the memory as you held both of their lumens in your hands, giving a fleeting kiss to each. Viktor’s snuggled happily into your palm while Jayce’s pulsed a happy gold before flying off, likely to check in with Viktor.
As your eyes lifted to follow its journey, you jumped when you found Jayce smiling from a few feet away by his desk. He seemed to be shuffling through some papers. Your lumen floated just nice his head, twinkling in the sunlight that shone through the windows behind you.
“Didn’t see you there,” you said, stretching your legs out before standing. Viktor’s lumen left your hand, keeping close to your neck.
“I hope you’re not bored.” He opened an arm up and you approached. You still grew giddy with any chance to be wrapped in his embrace, quick to accept the invitation.
“I like spending time here with you both,” you assured, giggling as he bent down to kiss your forehead. “Gives me plenty of practice.”
His eyes lit up, one of those dark eyebrows lifting. “Oh?”
“I know what you’re about to ask—”
“Please?” His arm wrapped tighter around your waist. “I wanna see.”
“They’re just rough sketches!” you laughed, pushing against his chest.
“C’mon, I bet they’re great! I’m sure Viktor wants to see them, too.”
You shook your head, a mess of giggles as he wrapped both arms around you and slowly edged his way towards the couch.
“Did someone call my name?” asked Viktor, turning from the machine he was working on. A torch was in his hand but luckily still off for the time being. Jayce’s lumen was sitting on his knee.
“Viktor tell her you want to see her art!” Jayce goaded.
“Tell him he needs to wait for a real piece,” you threw back, wrinkling your nose at him as he stuck his tongue out.
“You’ve been drawing us?” Viktor’s voice seeped with awe and innocent curiosity. “May we see?”
Jayce bounced his eyebrows at you, all too smug. “Told you.”
“Fine—fine!” you sighed, throwing your hands up and wiggling out of his hold as you went to grab your canvas notebook. “Don’t gripe when you see your half-finished faces.”
The tap of Viktor’s crutch intermingled with Jayce’s footsteps as they met you by the couch. As you handed over your work, Viktor was the one to accept it as Jace stood over him. Both their eyes went wide at the current page and your hand went straight to your arm as you shuffled in place.
“Those are just warmups, so…”
“Warmups?” Jayce breathed, looking up from the notebook. “These are amazing!”
“I have to agree, the detail is astounding,” Viktor hummed, looking to turn back a page. He caught your eyes before he did. “Is this all right? Tell us if we’re overstepping.”
“No, it’s okay! I’m used to people watching me draw on the street, it’s just… I don’t know.” You shrugged, bringing a hand up as Viktor’s lumen rubbed against your neck. Jayce’s was just settling on your shoulder again. “I care about what you guys think. It’s not anything big like you do, but…”
“Big?” Jayce echoed, both of their sights set on you.
“Well, it’s not as important as what you both do is what I mean.”
“Of course it’s important,” Viktor argued, expression stern.
“But it’s art!” you laughed, waving off the sudden seriousness growing from them. “It’s helping a bunch of people like your creations do. That’s much more important.”
“Art is just as, if not more, important,” he continued, passing the notebook to Jayce. “We are helping people in different ways, but do not do yourself the disservice and think what you create is anything less than what we do.”
“He’s right,” Jayce agreed, holding up your work. “This? This speaks to people. Your work can bring life to a room and lets people save a special moment in time.”
“Okay, don’t butter me up so much or I’ll melt!” you squeaked, too embarrassed to look at them as they chuckled and continued flipping through your sketches. It wasn’t long before the three of you were on the couch, both of them pointing out their favorites.
“Is my hair truly that messy?” Viktor grumbled, raising a hand to it. “Perhaps I should cut it.”
“No, I like it,” you said, grabbing his wrist. “You twirl it when you’re thinking! It’s so sweet.”
He blinked at you. “I do?”
Jayce whistled and you turned and gasped, completely forgetting the drawing you’d done of him in the forge. It was more from memory so your imagination had left it a bit more detailed than the rest.
“Okay, that’s enough!”
You swiped for the book, shutting it as Jayce laughed. Viktor rolled his eyes, smirking as he nudged your shoulder.
“Should I be worried of any scandalous pieces of me in there?”
You pouted, holding the notebook tighter to your chest.
“Oh?” Jayce breathed. “She didn’t say no!”
“You two are the worst!” you groaned, unable to help yourself from smiling as they both laughed in tandem.
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lovebug5151 · 9 months ago
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I completely agree. Yeah, when i have the time? I fucking love 3 hr videos. but how often do i have the time?
I have a rp series ive fallen behind on. i fell behind abt 13 episodes into s3, they are now about 100 episodes in on s4, and s3 had like 144 episodes or something. maybe more for both of those i havent looked in a bit, but at least those episodes are 10-30 min. i cant imagine, if i cant find the time to watch a few of those videos at a time, at finding the time to watch 3 or more 3 hr videos and being able to keep all the lore info in my brain
We have so little time, and it may be nice to have a 3 hr video to watch if you have the time and the spoons, but i know ive put off some of my favorite, absolute favorite youtubers videos bc i knew itd take up too much energy to follow along with on that day, and then i dont watch them for a month and ive fallen very far behind.
I. have forgotten where i was going with this. but, yeah.
i want to catch up on 100dmv so bad but like. the past few videos have been Several Hours Long. why is this now the standard. i miss dimdoors
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mashiraostail · 11 months ago
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Can I request hcs for Dammon, Rolan, and Zevlor with shy gn s/o?
omg im such a Zevlor lover idk like I know it was Wyll's intro scene but I was like "MEOW who is that." DLC to smash Zevlor when???
Dammon: He doesn't mind that you're shy, it may take a while for the pair of you to get together though, since he doesn't want to overstep and make the first move. He can be a bit awkward at first too.
Once he recognizes how you feel he'll feel much better asking you about it.
He likes to keep to his work, he isn't perturbed at your soft spoken nature.
He'll enjoy it most of all if you seek solace with him at social gatherings, murmuring to him under the lull of the crowd.
He doesn't mind speaking for you, or running the errands that make you nervous.
If you're still shy with him after getting together he'll be sort of flattered in a way. He may joke or prod at you, asking if you think he's handsome and that's why you're so shy.
Loves that you find comfort in him, he always saves you a seat and makes sure to keep an eye out for you if you separate for whatever reason.
He'll remind you of all of this if you seem particularly nervous about an outing or gathering. He doesn't mind being you crutch, he actually really enjoys it. He likes taking care of you in every sense of the words.
Rolan: He's such a stubborn bitch.
He'll secretly be sooo nervous he did something to offend you if he isn't sure why you're averting your gaze or acting especially soft spoken with him.
It will take him FOREVER to work up the nerve to ask if something is wrong, and he might not believe you if you don't give him a thorough enough answer.
He'll have to see you shyness out in the open with everyone to realize it's not a personal thing.
I don't think he's someone who likes to make the first move, that being said if you've got that sort of infatuated, flustered nervousness around him he'll pick up on it quickly. He'll be flattered and take that as a good enough sign to move forward with you.
He'll try to inch you out of your comfort zone as much as he can, especially since you operate on a similar social battery.
Once he's noticed it's too much he's happy to bring you home and retire for the night with a good book and quiet conversation.
Even when he's trying to push you he's never too far away for that exact reason. He'll even offer you some rare praise when you've been especially self serving for the day.
He doesn't mind your shyness since he has a similar distaste for people at times, though maybe less for nervousness and more for sheer annoyance. He appreciates that you open yourself up to him, and couldn't ask for much more.
Zevlor: Oh he's been around waayyyy to long not to notice how into him you are.
He'll let you be shy around him for a bit though, maybe it's cruel but he's flattered and he finds it a bit cute.
Eventually when he gets you in private he'll be happy to make the first move.
When you're at the grove he doesn't mind you always hiding out with him, your shyness and dislike of crowds is all the more reason to spend time alone together, something he's keen to do.
He'll try to push you out of your comfort zone, and like Rolan he won't be too far away from you.
He'll actually probably be right behind you, arms crossed, giving whoever you mustered up the courage to talk to a warning glare to be nice to you.
When you've exhausted yourself he's happy to take leave with you and reward you in private with anything you ask, though he will make you ask, explicitly, and probably in great detail. He can't help being a little mean, not when you make it so easy.
Out of the three he'll push you the most, but he'll also be the most rewarding for it. He's secretly afraid something will happen to him, and then who will be there to help you out? He hates the idea of someone taking his place, so he tries to help you be more self serving.
He likes that you're shy and nervous around him, it makes him feel younger, handsomer, just good all around.
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orlamccools · 4 months ago
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vent post under the cut- if youve got advice id love to hear it
so. ive been talking to this guy for a long ass while, you can scroll thru the last tag on this post to see what its all about, but long story short is this: i asked him out two saturdays agoto my friends going away party (which was held this past friday). hes met this friend once before, and we planned to meet at her place and then maybe go out to the bars after
entire week he is super into it, texts me more often than normal, creates a spotify blend for the two of us (w that feature that lets you combine your tastes into a single playlist) like im getting VIBES. and he asks abt our plans!!!! we make a solid schedule!!!
night of the party he texts me at 8:45 checking in to see if its all happening and i say yeah. i get home from work, change, then get to my friends house and text him that im here. he doesnt respond for an hour and finally says something abt how he has to charge his phone before coming out. im like ok man whatever i just want to hang so do what you gotta do. another half hour passes and then he hits me with the "hey idk if im gonna make it out". im disappointed by this, so i respond with like a "damn that kinda sucks :/" message. at this point i expect him to stop messaging me, but then he texts me quite literally for the rest of the night. like he literally doesnt stop until i text him that im walking home.
saturday i see him in person for a short period when he does the close out but another driver fucking also comes to sweep the store and just. will not stop talking to the dude in question. he like tries to get away twice but between customers and this other guy we dont talk like at all. after the other driver leaves and the store is closed he comes back in to use the bathroom and like stands by the door for a moment so i like look over but all he does is smile and wave then leave.
SATURDAY NIGHT. he texts me at like 8 responding to a text i had sent the previous night asking if im going out again tonight. i said yeah (bc a separate friend had a party) and he was like bet lemme know where youre at i might stop by and see you. i send him the address of the restaurant and proceed to hang w my friends until midnight. hes again texting me all night abt getting ready to head out but when we finally leave he hits me with the "finally leaving now where should i meet you". at this point i am exhausted, as ive just finished my first week of classes, had drunk heavily over the past 48 hours, and had worked a 13 hr workday that day. i text him and say im like too tired im going home and hes like damn :////
yesterday night. i do an eras movie night w my friends and i send a picture of the opening sequence to the ppl i have snapchat streaks with. he snaps me the rest of the night and is like "ohhhh you should have invited me" and stuff like that and its like. i didnt invite you for a multitude of reasons but like you ditched plans once this weekend and kept pushing back the other time i tried to invite you out, so why do you think i would ask you a third time???????
and now im just confused bc like. he seemed sooooooooo into it all week and then as soon as it was time for things to happen he just didnt show and kept stringing me along. im also lowkey pissed bc i wanted to hang with him and i was SO anxious abt asking him out (like i literally threw up twice friday morning bc i was so anxious abt how the day was gonna go). im just frustrated and like i had thought he had gotten the vibe that i was into him romantically bc it sure as shit seemed like he was reciprocating, and now im not even sure what to do anymore.
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ashturnedtomist · 2 years ago
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Keep it Covert: Ch.0
Prologue
@morgansplace came up with the title. everyone say thank you.
Summary: in which, things are not kept covert.
Next Chapter
TW: panic, cursing, force, Geordi starts to have a panic attack but you don’t really see anything
Read it on Ao3 too :)
Based off of this post
Morgan sighed, knitting his brows together.
Standing before him was the only other Seer Obscura that he knew existed, and they were exhausted.
“Can we just…take a break? Please?” They were working on honing their abilities and they had worn out their core.
“That’s fine, just sit down,” he gestured to the couch. He slumped down beside them, undoing his tie and turning on the TV. He flipped to a random news channel.
He froze.
‘-American government has already started making plans and precautions against this unknown threat. The leaked documents call them, ‘empowered.’
Morgan leaned forward, his heart pounding.
“Morgan?” He glanced at his trainee. “What-what does that mean?”
He shakes his head, his eyes trained on the screen. “I-I don’t know.”
‘We know little about these people. Where did they come from? How long have they been living among us? And, are they a danger?’
———
“Shit,” James muttered. “Shit, shit, shit.”
His phone had been ringing off and on for the past half hour.
“Your stress levels are elevated.” Asset sat to the side, eyeing their superior.
“I wouldn’t have guessed,” he muttered bitterly. They hummed in acknowledgment. “What has happened?”
James sighed, bracing his hands on his desk. “The Department was exposed.”
Asset tilted their head to the side. “What does that mean?” James looked up at them. “It means-” his phone rings again. “That the unempowereds know we exist.”
Ring.
“Which means our entire project could be shut down.”
Ring.
“Which means you could be shut down.”
Ring.
They stare at him blankly before looking away. “I see.”
Ring.
“God damn it!” He flung his phone across the room, a shattering sound echoing across the empty walls.
Asset looked around for a moment before facing him.
“Take my memory card.”
He looked up at them again. “What?”
“Take my memory card.” They repeat. “Or at least make a copy. That way, if they shut me down, you will at least have a way to put my memories somewhere else. Maybe you could make me again. Somehow.”
A glimmer of their old personality shone in their eyes. James swallowed thickly. “Okay…okay. We can-we can do that.”
———
Geordi was exhausted. He’d had a long day.
First, his internet went out, and so did his cable. So he had to get that fixed.
Then he phone broke, so he had to get that done too.
And when he finally turned his phone on when he got home, he was bombarded with messages and calls.
15 unread messages from Guy
3 missed calls from Guy
5 unread messages from “Honey”
2 missed calls from “Honey”
1 missed call from Cutie
1 unopened voicemail from Cutie
His stomach dropped. What happened?
Cutie hadn’t contacted him in weeks, let alone Guy’s partner. They were friends, sure, but not that good of friends.
Geordi swallowed thickly as he opened his messages
Guy
dude
where are you
have you read the news
do it asap
wait
maybe dont
well it might be better if you do
honey says you should
but idk
just do it
please
and dont panic
unless you heard something from them
then maybe you can panic
im definitely panicking
“Honey”
Read the news. Now.
I don’t care what you’re doing.
This is more important.
Ignore Guy. He’s in a bad headspace right now.
Check the news.
Geordi scrambled to open his news app. His eyes scanned the screen until he found what they could be talking about.
Friends or Foes? Who are these ‘empowereds?’
Geordi almost dropped his phone. He quickly scanned through the article, his heart rate picking up with every word he read. He felt like he was going to be sick.
He quickly checked his voicemail.
‘U-um, hey Geordi, I know I haven’t checked in in awhile but-‘
Something cuts them off. They sound like they’re crying.
‘S-sorry about that. Um, anyway, I just wanted to get this message out to you in case you don’t hear from me for awhile. I’m sure you’ve seen the news.’
Geordi bit his lip. So that’s what this was about.
‘I lost my job! Well, I think I did. Things are kind of a mess over here-’
Their voice cuts out.
‘-don’t know what’s gonna happen now. I don’t know what’s going to happen to me. I just- I-I love you, okay?”
Their voice grows more tearful.
‘I love you and I’m sorry I couldn’t have been a better partner to you. I’ve been trying so hard to get better. So hard. I don’t know when you’ll see me or hear from me next, so…’
They sniffle
‘I love you. Goodbye, Geordi.’
His phone clatters to the floor. He slides down the wall as his breathing grows heavy.
“No. No, no, no, no…”
———
Angel hums to themself as they mess around on their switch, Minecraft lighting up their screen. They had just finished building a house for themself and their dog when their phone went off. It was David.
“Hey, Davey, what’s-”
“I’m coming home. Don’t check the news. Just-just wait for me.”
“What? David, what’s-”
“Just wait.”
Beeping sounded in their ear, signaling that he had hung up.
Angel couldn’t ignore the sinking feeling in their stomach
———
Aaron pressed a heated kiss to his partner’s lips. “I’ll teach you to talk back, Smartass.” They giggled against his mouth, moving to unbutton his shirt when his phone went off. They whined as he pulled away. He chucked. “Hold on, it’s Elliott.”
He pressed the phone to his ear. “Hello?”
Flustered shouting could be heard from the other line.
“Woah, woah, woah, Elliott. What’s going on?”
As his brother chattered on from the other line, Aaron grew pale.
He hung up the phone.
“Aaron? What’s wrong?” Smartass clambered onto his lap. “What happened?”
He took their hands into his. He was shaking.
“The human government knows about empowereds.”
——-
It was supposed to be a good day. An amazing day. They were gonna finish work, pick up dinner, and cuddle Aggro until Milo got home so they could eat and watch a movie.
It was great.
But now, they were hiding under their desk while sirens wailed above them, and black military boots stomped by.
It all happened so fast.
One moment, they were talking to their coworker about their latest therapy session, and how they were going to reach out to their boyfriend again, and the next, the emergency sirens were going off and government troops stormed the halls.
They huddled under the protective covering of their desk, trying not to make too much noise.
Their phone started vibrating. They scrambled to silence it.
‘God damn it, Milo.’
A gloved hand reached under the desk and pulled them out.
“What a sweet little thing you are.”
Sweetheart yanks their arm away. “Get the hell off me.”
The man in front of them scoffs and says, “Don’t make this harder than it has to be. A lot of your colleagues have slipped away, but we have a few in holding.”
“Slipped away, huh?” Sweetheart says. “Well,” They look him up and down. “I guess they didn’t tell you how stealthy I can be.”
“What do you-” The man cuts himself off as Sweetheart disappears from his sight.
———
“Come on, Damien. I promise it doesn’t taste that bad.” Freelancer begged. Damien looked at the meal in front of him that Gavin had made. Everyone around him insisted that he try it.
“Yeah, it’s not that bad, Dames.”
“R-really, it’s good. Gavin outdid himself.”
The incubus in question leaned in close to the fire elemental.
“Please? For me? Don’t make me beg, Damien.”
Damien’s cheeks flushed a fiery red. “Fine. If it’ll get you out of my face.” Just as he went to go take a bite, Gavin’s phone rang.
“Ah…just a moment.” Gavin rose from his seat. “Don’t eat any just yet, I want to see the delectable look on your face when you try it!” He called before he disappeared out the door.
Freelancer furrowed their brows. What was that about?
They filled the time that Gavin was gone with casual conversation and some banter here and there. After about 15 minutes, Gavin came back inside.
He came back into the room, looking pale.
“Gavin?” Freelancer stood up. “What’s wrong? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“Turn on the news.” Everyone looked at each other. “Now.”
Notes: Geordi and Guy are friends
Honey and Cutie are friends
Honey is also empowered bc I said so 😍
Also: this will be centered around an idea I came up with, so stay tuned.
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tmnt-obsessed-ace · 1 year ago
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We know about how Ghost would react to your SSDF au but what about your original iteration tmnt: solar flare?
Idk if I should answer this since I have barely even TALKED about tmnt: solar glare on this blog. Let alone actually get the turtles ref sheets made. But on the other hand making Ghost suffer is very fun...
So Im doing it anyways
@bluepeachstudios Im borrowing the sad old man again (he's too much fun not too)
Putting it all under a read more because spoilers for a lot of major plot points in solar flare. If you dont wanna be spoiled dont look
You have been warned :)
The first thing Ghost would think is "How the shell are these kids not dead?" Because the turtles are absolute DANGER MAGNETS
These absolute idiots, on their first night being on the surface:
FOUGHT THE GODDAMN SHREDDER
NEARLY GOT KILLED BY THE SHREDDER
Got sent to the Spirit Realm
Got attacked by angry spirits
Accidentally CURSED themselves by messing with something they were absolutely not supposed to mess with
Barely escaped the Spirit Realm, now fully cursed
Accidently UNLEASHED dozens of angry spirits into New York
And to make matters worse they got discovered followed back home by a HUMAN (April)
That was NIGHT ONE
Ghost and his brothers were lucky, they only fought Mousers and the Purple Dragons on their first night
And it only gets worse
That curse I mentioned, it has pros and cons. The pros being that it can turn the boys into literal shadows, enhance their strength and speed, make them near completely invulnerable to attack, actually let them attack the previously untouchable spirits, (let then turn into giant shadow monsters), etc. The CONS on the other hand is that the curse is slowly KILLING THEM. Draining more and more of their energy, breaking their bodies a little more each time. And the more that the cool shadow abilities are used the faster the effects are, the worse they'll get and the longer they'll last. Yeah. Ghost would absolutely not have a good time with that. (And would most definitely devote as much time as he could to trying to create a cure or at least find a way to lessen the side effects)
Anyways then theres the matter of the Spirits running loose, very strong, very angry vengeful spirits. That cant be knocked out or killed, they have to be banished back to the Spirit Realm. Which is not at all an easy task. (And considering that the boys will at one point spend an entire WEEK fighting those ghostly fucks practically nonstop to the point that they dont even go back to the lair until they are literally about to pass out from sheer exhaustion...yeah not fun. Ghost might have to carry them all back home) And there's also the Shredder and his growing army of goons causing trouble. Point is Ghost is gonna have a REALLY hard time keeping the kids from constantly fighting for their lives against incredibly strong enemies instead of actually being kids. Poor Ghost
The constant stress and fear along is definitely straining the boys' relationships with each other.
Especially between Leo and Raph. The two closest siblings of the family. The ones that said they were twins and stood by that for their entire lives.
And now they're arguing practically all the time. Cant even go one mission without at least one argument. Leo making reckless plans thinking they'll work perfectly fine then panicking when things inevitably go south and Raph getting angry at him for "screwing up" only because Raph is absolutely TERRIFIED. And Ghost trying to be the mediator, but its hard when you have two incredibly stubborn sixteen year old boys at each other's throats. (Ghost is reminded of the many many Raph-Leo fights that his own Raphael and Leonardo used to have. Only somehow, these are worse.) It just escalates and escalates further and further until one night.
When Raph and Leo actually FIGHT each other.
And it ends when Raph full on quits the team and leaves. Leaves Leo alone on that rooftop, in the pouring rain. (Ghost will never forget that shocked, borderline horrified look on Leo's face as the reality and the guilt over what just happened sets in)
Raph doesnt come home.
Ghost thought he just needed time to cool off but he still doesnt come home. It gets to the point that he tracks the red clad turtle down.
Only to find him in the Footclan headquarters.
Raph had joined the Footclan because he was so tired of the fighting, the arguing.
(Obviously Ghost would go over there to try and break Raph out by any means necessary, even when Raph refuses to leave. He didnt want to join his family's biggest enemies but he was angry when he said yes and now he thinks he's in too deep to leave, even despite Ghost's attempts to reason with him)
Which leads to Leo to do something really, really, really stupid. Not saying what because major spoilers but it ends with him willingly offering himself up to be taken to another dimension in exchange for his family being spared the same fate.
What would happen to him there? Ghost doesnt know.
But that swirling white portal, his child being handcuffed and pushed through despite how hard everyone, Ghost included, is begging for this not to happen, no matter how hard he fights against his own restraints he cant free himself, it breaks something inside him.
All he can do is watch helplessly as Leo disappears into a portal, just like he did when he was sixteen himself, presumably to never be seen again.
Leo is gone for an entire month.
An entire of Ghost obsessively working on the portal with Donnie, trying so so hard to get it to work so they can find him. A month of trying to keep the family together and comfort his poor children who are falling apart at the seams. (Donnie doesnt sleep much anymore, trying so incredibly hard to get the portal working, even moreso than Ghost. Mikey teetering on the verge of a breakdown, going out with April and Casey to search for any signs of Leo every single night. Raph is consumed with guilt, it had been HIS fault that this whole mess happened, and now the poor boy is trying desperately to help his family while also trying to defect from the Footclan, which isnt easy.) A month of searching for the people that took Leo away, a month of hoping and praying that Leo was alright.
And then Leo comes home, with a white samurai rabbit in tow (Despite everything, Ghost finds it a little amusing that some things never change, even across dimensions)
He's different now. Quieter, not nearly as excited as he used to be. His arms and legs are completely wrapped up in black wrappings, up to the shoulder and upper thighs respectively. And he refuses to take the wrappings off. (He now has a slight limp on his right side, his brothers dont notice it but Ghost absolutely does.) And most importantly he refuses to talk about what happened when they were separated. Always saying "Its nothing." "I dont wanna talk about it." "There's nothing to talk about." "I'm fine."
Ghost is worried about him, obviously something happened. Something bad enough to turn the silly, dorky, hero-wannabe kid into this quiet, reclusive, guarded boy. Usagi knows as well but just says its not his story to tell.
Ghost tries to talk to him but every time he gets brushed off. (He did manage to figure out it somehow involved the Battle Nexus, from the tiny bits of information Leo shared. Though he highly doubts it was the same Battle Nexus he used to know) All he can do is provide comfort whenever Leo seeks him out, usually late at night and usually the result of a nightmare. (Which have become much much more frequent, only adding to Ghost's worry)
And unfortunately Leo is not the only one going through hell.
Because not long after Leo's return and Raph finally leaving the Footclan, Mikey gets captured. It would be bad enough if it was Shredder or the Krang. But it is so much worse and makes Ghost's blood run cold.
Mikey was captured by the EPF.
Ghost vividly remembers how a similar situation happened to him and his own Michelangelo. (How Mikey was almost dissected in front of him, how his own mid was torn apart for all the world to see. Bishop...)
The family hurriedly breaking into the EPF lab, hoping that they'll find Mikey in time.
They didnt.
Mikey wasnt as lucky as Ghost's Michelangelo.
Bishop, that sick twisted bitch, actually cut Mikey open.
Ghost's worst fear had been realized.
(Ghost never wants to see Mikey's bloody plastron and exposed ribcage ever again for as long as he lives. Watching his frantic heart gradually slow the more blood gushed out.)
And it only gets worse
Because Mikey, in a desperate last ditch effort to try and escape, he somehow activated a part of the curse that no one knew they had.
The ability to transform.
He had turned into a massive DRAGON made entirely of shadows (the only reason they knew it was him was because of the bright orange markings on the shadow dragon's body.)
And the dragon went on a rampage, obliterating the EPF lab including majority of the staff. (Unfortunately Bishop survived, which was a shame) and once the lab was destroyed it attacked New York, trying to tear everything apart in blind fear and panic. (Those terrified screeches will haunt Ghost for the rest of his life.)
It nearly killed them all trying to calm Mikey back down enough to get him home and stitched up. (And then clinging to Ghost like a scared koala for a very long time, not like Ghost can blame him.) And the worst part of this whole Dragon affair? Mikey cant CONTROL IT.
So that means the second his emotions get out of control, here comes the terrified dragon that will lash out at anyone perceived as a threat. (Which is anything that moves.)
And each time Mikey is beating himself up with immense guilt and fear that he will hurt the people he loves.
This is only the tip of the Solar Flare trauma train.
There will be more. (Raph and Donnie are gonna get their's too. So will April, Casey, and Splinter)
Other traumatic/weird events include:
Donnie getting kidnapped by Karai, which leads to April and their parents getting kidnapped. Which leads to April getting thrown off a building and Karai losing her entire arm. April is only 13 in this au btw so oh boy Karai better fucking run because once GHOST hears about that she might lose more than an arm.
Leo gets turned into a cat
Raph and Mikey get kidnapped by clowns
The boys get captured by an alien bounty hunter and taken to a completely different galaxy. Poor Ghost is gonna have an absolute heart attack.
The boys bring home a giant sea monster and keep it as a pet in the sewers. (They name it Jeffrey. Ghost left them alone for five minutes HOW DID THEY DO THIS?!?!)
Both RAPH AND LEO get thrown through the window in the Krang invasion. And Raph ends up in a coma (Leo already had his turn in a coma) Ghost having an absolute heart attack reliving this awful moment TWICE.
April's parents find out about the turtles (and later their paternal grandparents find out when the fam go to stay at their farmhouse)
The turtles are gonna be stuck in a timeloop for an entire month. (The entire month leading up to the Krang Invasion. They went from having a month to prevent it to only having a day and a half. Which is why the invasion happens.) Ghost will never forget that look of pure dread on his kids's faces when they looked up at the blood red sky filled with krangships. This is exactly what he didnt want to happen, his kids having to grow up too fast and get into problems far too big for them.
Also bonus: the turtles first meet Casey by literally RUNNING HIM OVER. The kids call Ghost frantically saying that they "accidently murdered someone what do we do?"
Poor Ghost, poor traumatized turtles
Lol
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lilacs-world · 1 year ago
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I feel like I’m chronically not okay but idk if I’m valid enough to label myself as chronically ill. I am able to work 40h a week but with the cost of laying in bed the rest of the day when I’m back home. In the weekends I sleep mostly. My room is a disaster because I never have the energy to tackle the chaos. I wished I was able to walk to work and back but standing for more than 15 min is already exhausting me and I get dizzy and lightheaded. I am constantly in pain, my normal pain level is on good days at a 2 on bad days it’s at a 4 or 5 but maybe I’m too modest about my pain due to fear of admitting I’m not okay. I am always tired even if I sleep usually enough. At times I feel more refreshed with only 4 hours of sleep hell knows why. I am waking up daily at 5:45am to get myself ready for 8am work. I don’t know if I’m ever gonna be a functioning adult. I am scared of the moment I will unmask bcs im masking daily due to Audhd. Plus daily I’m confused because we are often switching and my quality at work at times fluctuating and my TLs wondering wtf bcs we know u know all the processes so wtf. Daily I feel like I know only a specific part of the processes and I have days where I ask so many questions that one of the TLs told me they are growing gray hairs bcs of me asking so much. The doctors in my country are shit when I mentioned suspecting we are a system they said nah it’s just ur anxiety. When I questioned if I have adhd my former psych said nah only kids can have it. My former therapist said yeah after unofficially diagnosing me with it. Autism I suspect that too and I got my confirmation more or less from my bf who’s on the spectrum as well. He got his confirmation he has adhd as well by me noticing lots of adhd things in him and he has now meds whilst me is in this godforsaken country that isn’t taking me seriously. I got my confirmation I have adhd when I took speed and realised for the first time "so this is how neurotypicals experience their life?" I for once had a train of thoughts in order and not a carambolage of luggage’s getting stuck in the baggage claim belt. I sobbed so hard. On good days I am able to remember and memorise lots of shit. But on bad days I barely anything. My body is out of control. I have pcos and it’s ravaging my body. I grow hair on my chin and arms and it’s making me uncomfortable and I developed anxiety about having hair in my face to the point over pluck and over shave it. My period is out of control. I either bleed for 2 months consecutive or I don’t have my period for 6 months. I am anemic due to it. I am such a pale human that I’m constantly being asked if I am okay. Oh yeah not to forget having an autoimmune disease since I am 2 years old. Having to deal with psoriasis break outs each winter where I end up being covered on my legs, arms , ass with skin patches of psoriasis. At times it’s even in my eyebrows and on my scalp. Each winter is a torture for me. I am battling with depression as well. Luckily this last year it wasn’t so overbearing and I felt more human than I used to in the past. Nonetheless my anxiety is ravaging and leaving me crippled daily. I sound ridiculous talking about myself rn bcs in my brain I feel like you aren’t this sick or unwell you are faking this you are a horrible human for saying all this things but I know it’s probably my internal ableism and the internal critical subconsciously developed voices of my surroundings telling me I’m not actually sick and I need to go to work even if sick etc. Sigh. Idk where I wanted to go with this whole post. I know you guys don’t see often a personal post from me or posts from me and more reblogs of stuff I enjoy seeing and stuff I wanna boost and stuff I find important or relatable or stuff that I think might make someone feel better and less anxious or feel seen. I hope this is fine. I hope being more real is helpful. Maybe I should do this rambling on my other blog @unfilteredrealities where I tried to talk about life in a real way , unfiltered. You can even send in your own submissions if u want to.
Anyway thanks for reading my ted talk.
TLDR: I don’t know if I’m actually chronically ill and if I’m valid enough to label myself as that and then I rambled about my life experiences with audhd, did, anxiety, depression, pcos, psoriasis and there are more but I’m exhausted.
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yandere-sins · 2 years ago
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Do you currently live in Germany? Is smoking very prevalent there and for underage kids too? I know drinking is pretty common from what i heard but idk. Not judging btw just curious lol! I like your story times 😂 im still reeling over the cheater guy
I do live in Germany, and I'll probably never move away if I'm honest. Most other countries really don't appeal to me and I have my family and friends here, so no real reason to move. If I do get the chance to marry outside of my home country (which would be very appreciated personally), I don't think I would move away from all the benefits (unless my partner turns out to be finnish or smth, upgrades are fine lol).
However, I can't tell you how it is these days with kids, I am too old to actually know what's going on and too young to have my own lol. These days it might be a bit more prevalent than in the past, especially with parents too. Back in my school time it was more of a "cool kids" activity and there weren't that many kids in every class who were active smokers. I wasn't a cool kid per se but I had a lot of friends that were and they were smokers so occasionally I'd join and eventually it turned into social smoking with others, and then when I started working and there were benefits to being a smoker (more breaks, the stress would lift a bit, everyone was doing it so it was another way to socialize) I committed to it. But there were lots of struggles like parents who were still firmly against it, how to get cigarettes (you'd need to ask someone who was older or had connections), hiding it from parents and teachers. It was quite an ordeal. But like I said, no idea what is going on with the youth today.
Also "drinking is pretty common", is probably a stretch ^^' I did go out a lot as a teenager, but mostly on the weekend. I think a lot of people think giving teenagers the ability to buy beer and wine with 16 will automatically make them alcoholics but back when we did it, it really was more of a weekend party thing. And even then, most of my friends knew their limits and personally, I never met someone with alcohol poisoning while underage. It also was an ordeal as well because we'd only be able to drink outdoors or if one of the parents allowed it (but they'd usually supervise us), so if it rained or was winter, tough luck. And we got shooed away constantly. Sometimes we'd change the location 3-5 times a night because someone felt offended by the volume or us just hanging out casually. And there was only one 16+ club in all of the city, and I lived pretty far from it so there was almost an hour drive to and from to calculate, while also needing to be at home at midnight.
At the same time, when I finally turned 18 and got to drink harder stuff I pretty much knew my limits. I never threw up and can hold my liquor well, also don't suffer from hangovers, though recently I started getting stomach aches from wine so I'm refraining. I basically only drink cocktails, sparkling wine and seldomly whiskey at this point, and so rarely that it's hardly worth mentioning. I remember drinking a cocktail when Suzume came out in the cinema, so in April, and nothing since then lol I think the experience really helps you get better with these kinds of substances, and you learn to use them healthily if you're not drowning your feeling in them and just have fun like they are meant for.
I will tell you tho, the most garbage drink I used to have is Aperol Cola. No idea why my friend thought that was good. It's disgusting, overly sweet and bitter at the same time, literally nauseating, unhealthy af, and has no good quality about it. Especially when it gets warm, blergh. Do not recommend. You'll never drink Aperol again after that.
Looking back at it, partying was exhausting and even now where I'm free to do whatever I want, I never go to a club anymore because it's just a waste of my time tbh lol
But I really can't tell you how it is these days with the teenagers. If anything I see more smokers but very, very little drinkers. Something definitely changed, but maybe I'm just not in the right places to actually notice it.
Also, I'm glad you enjoy the story times! They are literally just silly anecdotes of a stranger, but it's still nice to reminiscence sometimes ^^
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needyoulikeaheartbeet · 8 months ago
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the tortured poets department: the anthology - first listen
THIS IS SO EXCITING So I have been exhausted 25/8 because of work and my body constantly aching from long covid (i love ma life) so I only got to listen the next day I tried to stay up until midnight but I literally only made it to ~11:45 lmao
My eyes popped out of my head when I woke up to a double album drop - 31 SONGS TO LISTEN TO IN ONE GO I WAS SO HYPE I also laughed bc ofc taylor did a surprise release and now we have 31 new gems to treasure HERE ARE MY FIRST THOUGHTS !!
1. Fortnight SOFT SYNTH OH HER VOICE?????  OH I LIKE THIS  Y DID THAT REMIND ME OF FLORENCE OL ENDLESS FEBRUARY… I LOVE YOU ITS RUINING MY LIFE  I really like post malone  HELL YA  FLORIDA She said america its like she said my name
2. The Tortured Poets Department Ok drum O no fuckin body alright gf SPARKLY Charlie poot  You awaken with dread, pounding nails in your head  I laughed in your face and said - i like how she sings that!!! Wow her lows and highs in this song are wild! Bridge is best rn in this song !! oh wow jack lucy wowee  Omg the ring?????????????  Hello jack
3. My Boy Only Breaks His Favourite Toys Oh okay her VOICE Miss voice The deep parts helloooooooooooo  This wasnt the sound i thought we’d get for this song at all but this is cool (i was expecting like a sultry old timey jazzy "my boy" song in the same like arena of the start of christmas tree farm old timey version lmao) Litany This is gonna get stuck in my head often i can already see it i can already tell  Danger in the heat of my touch  Once i fix me hes gonna miss me???? Wow thats so real  Told me im BETTER OFF  Imma shake my fist
4. Down Bad THIS SOUND HELLO? Ok but her oice?????  YAAAA What is this noise bro  Oo cosmic love But the way she sings the verses???  Ofc hi jack  Its gonna grow on me ik aaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA bubble sound There are so many f words  I might just die it would make no difference real  Ok but these worbly sounds are nice  THAT SOUND AT THE END GIVES lana vibes
5. So Long London Hello choir  Oh so SO long LONG OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Lmao Oh  Ok i kinda love htis  Ok i love her VOICE HELLO?  OO Omg Omg Omg THE SPINE BRAIN MAKE LAUGH LINES WOEOWOEWOEOWE (why did i write brain? HAHA) OH THE TRAGEDY STUF that is so good  Whoa holy shit the lyrics  ALL THAT YOUTH FOR FREE???? N HER VOICE? WOW  2 graves 1 gun  OH LAYERING IS THAT PIANO OR SYNTH IDK ITS SO GOOD My mouth has been open Her voice im screaming i love it and the FASTNESS SO GOOD  THAT GUITAR  Bro????????????????????????? I want to put this on repeat
6. But Daddy I Love Him I want to prance on my tip toes and throw leaves one by one  Reminds me of a 2000s movie Omg jack and aaron on this one  Im vibin Ok bitchin Omg thats a WILD part lmfaooo HELLO?  Thats kind of crazy lmaoooo like i get it but wowee  Its giving ours vibes  Im having his BABY? yeah you should see my face LMAO What is happening in this song lmao IM NOT CATCHING ALL THE LYRICS YET ITS TOO SOON AND NOW I FEEL LIKE THAT MR KRABS MEME   i like when she sings it was chaos etc
7. Fresh Out The Slammer OH HELL YEAH ELL  YEAH I AM ALREADY INTO IT Interesting drum  Wow her range in this song too that was so low  Is that a violino PRETTY MELODY O it slowed down  Ok i like the ending bit
8. Florida!!! her vocals MUAH LIL REVERBY GUITAR the drums threw me off ok florence vocals! so flowy bodies body in my mind they sink into the swaMP???? ok the home and town part is nice at the end here oo
9. Guilty As Sin? Ok beat AM I ALLOWED TO CRY !!!!! Ok chorus is NICE  Ok so far this is my second fave!!!!!!  Ok i really like this  WHAT IF HES WRITTEN MINE ON MY UPPER THIGH ONLY IN MY MIND Without ever touching his skin HOW CAN I BE GUILTY AS SIN BEECH Theyre gonna crucify me anyway HOLD ME OO Wow religious hello  Nice bridge Oh I choose you and me religiously eEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Oh wow interesting way to jump back into the chorus that is different I LIKE IT Ok IM INTO THIS
10. Who's Afraid Of Little Old Me? This is reminding me of 2013 idk why  OHHHHHHH YOUDONT GE TTO TELL ME ABOUT SAD YES BEECH OH WOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW YES  OK YES  The guitar and the intonation and her VOICE YES SCREAMIN HELL YAAA Omg i love this  Ok another top song  Omg i love this  Ok this is #2 … or #1… !! Everything about this !!!!!!!!  WHOS AFRAID OF LITTLE OLD MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe SELF WRITTEN YAS Oh the but what ifs so real lmaoo  Omg yes Asylum where they raised me?? Bb :(  drunk on my own tears???  Lol put narcotics into all my songs ha ha Circus life made me mean Lured hurt taught caged ??? calle dcrazy? Aw :( i am what i am cause you traine dme??? Oh
11. I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) Ok i liked that first sound Good guitar Shes delulu ? Texas part was lana like Wow face… that was really low   Domme vibes ????? good boy? Come closer? Ill show you heaven if youll be an angel all night? Okkkkkkkk maam ! Oh i liked i told you hes my man hec ya Lmao whoa maybe i cant thats funny
12. loml Pinnano Ok this is going to be nice  Omg i thought i was better safe than starry eyed ok!!!!! This sounds sweet  I like  Topper  Aw the way she said you said im the love of your life about a million times  Blew in with the winds of fate omg  Omg the fakes line  CONMAN WOW Omg never before and ever since HER VOICE STHUSHGRJ THIS IS A STORY WOWOEWOE OWEER I love this Omg the vocals in th eback  Mr steal your girl then make her cry wow  UNRECALL SONG!! Omfg cant get out of bed bc something counterfeit is dead OKKKKKKK This is a top song Valiant roar  Bland goodbye Woweweowoeoweooweotwetirfv Nfkjnksjnsn Braids of lies !!!!!!!!!!!!! This is so good stfu :(  OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD YOURE THE LOSS OF MY LIFE SHUT THE FUCK UP SOMEONE GUESSED IT WOULD GO FROM LOVE OF MY LIFE TO LOSS OF MY LIFE SHU T UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP Im crying btw holy shit that was so good.
13. I Can Do It With A Broken Heart Oh zippy  HEY EY EY Lol  Aw while on tour Mirroball? Hello lol  He said he’d love me all his life  Omg thats so fuNNYYYYYYYYYYYYY SHUT UP LMAO Barbie !! It's giving Barbie!! LOL Im laughing so much this is great  Im so depressed, i cry a lot  Amaizing. So real. What a professional  LMAO i cannot  IM SO DEPRESSED I AC TLIKE ITS MY BIRTHDAY EVERY DAY <3  I CRY A LOT BUT I AM SO PRODUCTIVE ITS AN ART Ok i love this so much lmaoooo  Cause im miserable! And nobody even knows!!! What a professional queen  LMAO TRY AND COME FOR MY JOB? I love her stfu  I wanna listen to it again please omg
14. The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived Ofc jw lmao help me  who the fuck was that guy  Oh the beat is building  Omg ? Who tf ghosts taylor swift ? im gonna fight Rusting my sparkling summer wow  Oh my god this is savage i dont miss what we had but could someone give a message to the smallest man who ever lived KNGKJFNG Deep voice Oh bridge vocals YAAAAAA STRINGS YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA You deserve PRISON?? GIRLL Slip through the bars that was nice  CRASHED MY PARTY NICE  PERFORMING nice i love how shes singing these parts !!!!!!!!!! Ok i like how that tied up and ended neat
15. The Alchemy Ok i like this alreadyyyyyyyy It's reminding me of Glitch??? idk why Love white wine  Ok yaaa ! Smooth  Low vocals allooo  But even the instrumentals i love  Top ranking  song  Oh winning streak sound in the back i love
16. Clara Bow Ok i like the heaviness of the guitar yes Think i might die! Aw lights of manhattan  Promise to be dazzling Stringy sound!!  Stevie nicks!  Knew this was aaron  Suits in LA - i love when she does this in songs man idk she does it so well :)  Im dancing  Beauty is a beast etc nice  Girlish glow flickers just so omfg nice  Its hell!! On earth!! oMG THIS PART IS SO NICE STFU You look like taylor swift?? Omg  The futures bright dazzling DUDE SHE DOES THIS SO WELL SHUT UP I LOVE SONG WRITER TAYLOR SWIFT. this is so soft Reminds me of The Lucky One
17. The Black Dog This sounds sad already Oh  Oh that is sad Oh its a bar You forgot to turn it off  :c  Best laid plans!!!!!!!!!!  Oh in the shower  Rain soaked body was shaking omg ............................. IS THIS MY SHOW. ok erica not everything is abt u BREATHING CLEAN AIR SMOKE OGMKGJF Aw :( set fire to all my clothes  hello jack Omg our/my dreaming
18. imgonnagetyouback WE WONT GET FOOLED AGAIN NONO Thats the vibe Ok nvm
Oh Thats nice This will grow on me fr sure NICE BRIDGEEE LOL even if handcuffed Oooo play the game part Im poison either way skfjdn Ok going back into chorus was v nice end chorus is so nice w back vocals
19. The Albatross AARON VIBES  I like how her voice sounds it is TO MY TASTEEEE Ok this is a top so far i think  It is giving folklore  Oooo vocal range  I'm dancing And i tried to warn you about them that is very taylor sounding 
20. Chloe Or Sam Or Sophia Or Marcus Why cant my name be chosen Oh i like the piano hello??????  My bones out?  Oh the guitar? Bro this is SO pretty Oh this is so good wowowowow Its building up ?? i love this This tops the albatross  Depths of your sigh??  Her breathin?? Float in your orbit Her voice !!! stop it! I love this SAY YOU LOVED ME AAAAAAAA Oh vocals i love Will i always wonder TOP SONG HOLY SHIT i am hurt
21. How Did It End? Ok hi vocal i love u  SO MUCH? Wow Omg the QR CODES Flower! I love the piano and her voice wow  Oh i love that so much the VOCAL TUNE Learned the right steps to different dances!!! Top song i think idk omg  I would do so bad singing to this by myself between verse and chorus oof lol Oh guitar heading into bridge i loooooooooooooove this stuff Yes aaron My beloved ghost and me thats cute I cant pretend like i understand either
22. So High School GUITAR BEBIIIIIIIII very good DRUMS This is p different!! LOW Cute this is giving like 2000s romcom vibe  Lol thats cute marry kiss or kill me INTERVIEW - OMG BETTING ONALL THREE?  Awwww car door This is so cute Ok this part is cute and catchy you knew what you wanted and boy you got her !!  She is so in luv very cute  Ok im dancin this is really cute I feel so high school every time i look at u !! TRUTH DARE SPIN BOTTLES thats so catchy i love it  I can dance around to this for sureeEEEEEEEEEEEEe ok i love
23. I Hate It Here I hear u countin This is so aaron I like the concept of secret gardens I also hate it here  1830s good clarification omg shes so right This is good??? LUNAR VALLEYS !!!! Only the gentle survived Wow this is so REAL I dreamed about it in the dark the night i felt like i might die? Omg. is she me?  This is very real i am hurting Ill save all my romanticism??? HELLO? Made me feel worthless? CURRENT FLIES THROUGH ME? LOVE  Wow i love this song? This is a top im not kidding  An anthem  YOU ARE A POET TRAPPED INSIDE THE BODY OF A FINANCE GUY LMAO?  Sorry Finance guy 
Thats so funny I loved this song Im kinda crying now though i feel seen  Tbt the story i tried to write in high school called the art of disappearing
24. thanK you aIMee I like her voice  Down the stairs? I cri lmao  I cant forget the way you made me heal!!  Laughing at each baby step i take? Same searing pain!!!  Aw. prayed that one day i could say !!!  You know what i am totally with this fuck you aimee hell yeah  KGNKFSJGFSNGFSKG ANDREA LMFAO PLEASE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WISHED YOU WERE DEAD??? ANDREA!!!! LOL  OMG I BUILT A LEGACY THAT YOU CANT UNDO. GOOSEBUMPS.  Wow  Bro this is good?  Aw bea tmy spirit black and blue  Im laughing so much about andrea PLEASE Aw i pushed each boulder up that hill  This sounds country This warm my heart idk ilu taylor what a complex feeling to capture
25. I Look In People's Windows Same Dancing to this guitar  I spied the catch in your breath ooo  Chorus is fun  Omg what if your eyes looked up and met mine OOOOO LOVE VOCALS If someone looked at me while i was looking into their house id scream This is a nice song  Does it feel alright to not know me  OMG Im addicted to the if onlys  This is so good LOL like im some deranged weirdo  The downtown part man wow
26. The Prophecy I heard the countin  Oooo i like where this guitar is taking us  Ok so far im enjoying this  Caught lightning in a bottle  Oh!!! Cursed like eve ot bitten!!  Change the prophecy wow  Aw Just wants someone who wants my company :(  Ok dude this is so good??????  This is literally so good?  DRUMS HELLO IM HYPE  Very last drops of an ink pen  This is so good????? BUT EVEN STATUES CRUMBLE IF THEYRE MADE TO WAIT Greige Aw So someone will tell me itll be okay Is that string instrument?? This song is the version of the hello god its me when will it be my turn meme Omg vocals wow that was magical  REminds me of seven
27. Cassandra Placing daydreams  PIANOOOOOOOOOO Omg in ym tower weaving nightmares? They say what doesnt kill you makes you aware what happens if it becomes who you are  Payroll line is like the vibe i thought my boy etc wouldve sounded  Omg no one heard NICE SNAKES omg i understand  Do you believe me now omg  A mourning warning no one heard wow  Omg she sang so low how does she do that
28. Peter Oh i LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE this piano  I wanna learn it  This is self written  Omg peter pan???  Promises ocean deep but never to keep Is the sound muffled I LOVE THAT OLD TIEMY 25???  Oh shelf life omg  Lost to the lost boys chapter of your life !! Oooo the way she sang the light speak now vibe  I really love the piano  the repetition is an interesting choice i need my brain to process it and figure out what it mean
29. The Bolter I like the soun I like story :)  Cute melody  Oh WHORE ok!! caught me off guard ngl  lmaoo  As she was leaving it felt like breathing !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Making him care oh All roses portrait poses omg  LOL what a charming saturday!  Oooooooooo littlest leaks  races/aces sound nice  Escape in escaping nice  Hands around each others shoulders and swaying to the beat and singing lmao  Then i would jump abt all her lives lol  Sounds nice 
30. Robin Pinnano Her voice sounds so clean and smooth  Omg thats the aaron beat  Wow deep voice Her range  Aaron guitar sounds or is tha tbass  Looooooooooooooooooooooong may you roar  In sweetness  tiger…WOODS?  Tbh idk whats happening in terms of lyrics i am not processing them right now but her voice is pretty  This is about a child? And childhood before you are CORRUPTED ? owwie :( wholesome :(
31. The Manuscript PINNANO Good voice i like I love the story tellin  Is this the first time she said sex  I eat kids cereal  Oh :( owwie Aaron sounds  Good vocal omg One last souvenir  Oh but the story isnt mine anymore wow!!!  What a journey! 
this album is incredible
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ocean-anchored · 8 months ago
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What am I even feeling. It’s like I feel extremes on both sides. One day I’m all in & im excited and just want to marry him. The next day I’m picking things apart wondering if I’m being misled or question if I’m hearing from God. Question if I’m moving too fast. Question if I’m making the wrong choices out of emotion.
Why do I act so petty? Like I’ve just been the one sacrificing coming out there the last 3 weeks? Which is fine, but then idk. What did I expect? I should be appreciating that he’s making an effort to come out tmrw night for Sunday. But it was meaning a lot if he would come meet Melissa. & now saying that it might be calling for showers tmrw so he won’t seed which means he can work on his yard which ok makes sense I know he’s got a lot to do. But he still says he thinks he won’t leave till 6 or 7pm? Like I understand the yard work stuff but it makes me sad that maybe the priority doesn’t come through… like I get one day with you.. and I hate to say that I’m pretty darn sure he’s not waking up early to do this. He’ll probably start at like 11 or 12 maybe & even then like idk, to me it’s like why could you not think to get up early to get the main stuff done so you can leave at 4 or 5 to make a point in meeting my sister… knowing that’s important to me. & like his idea that this summer he’ll “be out around Calgary” so he can spend time out here… like great how much time are we actually getting? You leave after work to come in the night before, to golf the whole day so I might get Saturday night even though you’ll be exhausted, & then get half of Sunday with you before you go back home? So I get a day & a half? Meanwhile I’m the one that makes the point to come out for a week? Ugh. Idk. Maybe I’m just being petty & unrealistic but man that really blows. Here I’ve invested so much time into getting to know his family & yes I really appreciate that he’s coming in to spend Amanda’s birthday, but like it’s hard to see that he wants to invest in my family back. I know calgarys not your home but here I am again going to come out next weekend to spend Sunday with your family at the gender reveal & probably come back because if I go to Edmonton with Ed. Like I just really wonder & question a bit of the priorities. Lawn care vs meeting my sister, my best friend who’s important to me for you to get to know… idk. I really don’t know. Here I was again feeling pretty confident again that things are right, that I want to invest in this because of his character etc & why I feel like I’m investing more? Making more of the planning? Like he probably was going to do most of those golf tourneys around Calvary regardless of dating me. There’s what, two? Mickleson and strathmore? Jasper is a getaway & cranbrook we haven’t even talked about if I’m going with him. I’m just really scared that I want more of the intentional commitment. He feels nonchalant or leaves things till later which is what scares me. Like pre marital counselling? You said it initially but I haven’t heard talk about it since. Planning a trip this summer, we briefly talked about NFLD but then nothing. It’s almost June… like there’s no more sitting around for time anymore if these are things we want to plan… I hate last minute planning. Idk. Is this small enough stuff that we can just work through? That can just be communicated? That’s not going to impact me or us enough that leaves me questioning? I honestly don’t know. Maybe I really should wait and find a place to live for a year…
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loucipherrrrr · 1 year ago
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Talk to ya later
but probably not.
Tbh i’m tired, fed up, bored, annoyed, beat down, exhausted. Tired of checking up on you. tired of asking how you are. tired of begging to hang out. tired of you not making time to do things with me. tired of you flaking.
NO: I have been talking about going together since november maybe even october. every month you’ve pushed it back. one month we were supposed to go and the week of you tell me your friend is coming too… “she always comes anyway” like i was supposed to know she was coming this time like she has a permanent spot when you go back home. how are 2 large dogs and 3 adults supposed to fit in your lil honda? why didn’t you think about this before i took those days off. why didn’t you say she was coming to begin with? yeah she’s Always going with you, so i thought you’d tell her not to come this time bc i Never go with you. wtf. Then january comes around i’m asking ab going again and you say you’re going for madi gras…???!!!! in february the weekend before my birthday like I don’t have plans. bitch come on!!! you got into a accident so you have no car. this literally reminds me of louis. LOL!!!!!! I would have to take my car so we’d be taking 2 cars I might as well go alone. why sit here and say let’s schedule something so we can just do things with the dogs. i think we’re actually scheduling something looking for days i can take off so we can actually do it and you FLAKE every time.
R/L/L: I’ve dropped people over flaking. Why you’re so dif idk. You flake all the time. we’d make plans to watch movies together and instead you’d be sleep. you’d rather pick up a bottle than stay up sober. “i’m so tired, i just need a nap. why didn’t you wake me?!you can still come but i’ll be sleep.” Every time i think you’ll actually wake up ON YOUR OWN to make time to WANT to hang with me. but instead i’m begging you to hang. IM always coming to you. When you did have a car you rarely came here. yes theirs stairs and blah blah bs but you work 5 minutes up the road but i’d always be meeting you at your house? I’m so tired of doing things for fuckers that wouldn’t do the same for me.
N: I’ve watched your child multiple times for you while you’ve gone to wherever. i’ve asked you to watch stella once. i never go anywhere as is but if i were to “need a break” i’d still have to deal with mine bc you’re normally “going through it” too. like it’s never equal? “i’m getting another job can you watch her until i get my life together?” i say sure bc my child needs a play fucker but what if i’m tired of mines but you’re going through it too? like wtf.
Tired of me asking you if you’re good. asking if you’re alive. asking if you’re okay. asking about you. asking this that and the third without you asking me for shit. yeah i can’t keep my mouth shut and i’m just rambling half the time anyway. but when i’m not you’re silent… no are you okay without me saying i’m not. no are you goods from you.
You always got company. always doing some shit then complaining about it later. Complaining about having people at your house till 4am then saying you didn’t get any sleep and also getting drunk after you said you’re done drinking. “this is my last night out” Everytime you go out. Lmao i just be wanting to be included but for that to happen i have to ask instead of you just offering… but you’ll tell your company about whatever y’all got going on she’s always invited. Am i to much? To little? What’s the problem??If you don’t want me there just say that before I make a fool outta myself. I swear you be thinking that shit is funny.
you said you were spirling i said i am too. i asked you the next day if you were good but you didn’t ask me. haven’t asked me shit since actually. you stay MIA often and i’m always trying to figure out if you’re okay or not. If you need anything or whatever but i swear you be forgetting ab other people around you. But I’m not talking about your company that you have around you 24/7 i’m taking be me the nigga who dropped whatever they got going on to make sure you’re good thinking you’ll do the same. LMFAO.
your company you always got with you is all you think about. i’m so mf tired of it. i bet you lost my house key i gave you. lmfao i’ll be changing my emergency contact soon. don’t worry ik you’ll be to busy to come out anyway
ps: lol you remember when i made a matching set of earth girls and the one i made you, you didn’t want ᵒʳ ˡⁱᵏᵉ. ʷᵉ ʷᵉʳᵉ ˢᵘᵖᵖᵒˢᵉᵈ ᵗᵒ ᵍᵉᵗ ᵗʰᵉᵐ ᵗᵃᵗᵗᵉᵈ and that never happened. but now all of a sudden i make a betty pic that you like better and you want to get that tatted instead… it doesn’t work like that.
definitely weird behavior. don’t wanna be around it anymore. tbh i’m good in solitude. 🧑🏽‍🦯😘🕺🏽🫡
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rin-itoshi · 3 years ago
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kisses . genshin impact (pt. 2)
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> summary: places the genshin boys kiss you other than the lips (ft. bennett, chongyun, razor, xiao, xingqiu, zhongli)
> content: fluff , gn!reader , ooc(?idk)
here’s part one!
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# BENNETT
where: your palm!
why: this man does not know how to stfu, so when you have to forcefully shush him, your palm is the best spot for his lips to kiss.
“It’s awfully quiet today,” you murmured as you turned on your heels, hearing the whirlwind of a boy coming your way. He nearly tumbled—so close to crashing at your feet but fortunately caught himself before he could hit the ground. He stood up straight, dusting his clothes with a breathy laugh before yelping out a pained, “Ow!”
“What happened?” You ask as you reach out to cup his face, checking his head and skin for any injuries.
The male chuckled with a closed eyed smile, “I got hit by a rock!” His voice echoed within the city, making you slightly cringe when your ears ached. He was quick to go off on a tangent, babbling about some nonsense that made you even more confused than before.
“Bennett,” you call out to grasp his attention. The moment he turned your way, you slapped a hand over his mouth with an amused smile. “I know you’re excited and want to talk, but we should move away from the Knights of Favonius headquarters before Captain Kaeya kills us.”
He kissed your palm gently, eliciting a ticklish sensation in your hand that made you pull away. Before you could do anything about his sneaky kisses, he grabbed your hand and began dragging you away, talking about some adventure team he was putting together.
# CHONGYUN
where: your shoulders!
why: he likes the smoothness of your shoulder when he lays down behind you and can rest easily without being judged.
The bedroom door creaked open to reveal the blue haired male who stood in the doorway with a pensive look on his face. Upon seeing you lying in your shared bed, he exhaled deeply and you could practically see relief wash over is features. “[y/n],” he breathed out as he shuffled into the room, scurrying over the bed to climb onto the silk sheets and lay himself in the spot behind you.
He wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling your body into his chest as gently as possible. As hesitant as he was, he was way too tired to be reluctant about holding you even thought you clearly felt the same need for touch as him. “’m so tired.”
After a long day of training, he was exhausted and was in desperate need of your touch in order to replenish the energy he had depleted earlier that day. It was only much better now that you were both living together and were able to cuddle as much as needed after work.
“Welcome home, my love.”
He buried his face in the crook of your neck, doing his absolute best to push away the strong emotions that burned inside of his heart. He refused to flare-up in front of you ever again, but with you unknowingly doing things to stir him up, he was always struggling to keep calm.
Peppering kisses along your shoulders, you felt a shiver run down your spine at the cold sensation of his lips on your skin. It was a blissful feeling, warming up your heart with love despite how cold his body truly was. Too beautiful.
# RAZOR
where: your eyelids!
why: this one may sound weird but he just gets curious when he keeps watch and tends to do it without a thought.
Razor stood tall at the peak of the mountain that you both temporarily resided on. His chin was held high, chest puffed out with a sense of responsibility flowing through his veins at the thought of watching over you while you slept to keep you out of harms way. It wasn’t necessarily a demanding duty but for you, it meant a thousand times more than it usually would have.
The boy approached your sleeping body. You were rested on the ground under his jacket that barely shielded you from the cold weather tonight presented to you both. He gently tugged his jacket further up your body, covering your arm that had been slightly exposed.
You were cute like this, sleeping so peacefully with so much trust in the guy who could barely communicate yet you loved him so much. It was amazing.
Subconsciously, he bent down and placed a chaste kiss on your eyelid. You stirred in your sleep, forcing him to jolt away in surprise before settling when you murmured something sleepily, smiled and then relaxed. Your behavior was new to him and yet, it brought so many different feelings into his heart. Unknowing to you, he smiled genuinely and patted your head gently.
“You rest. I keep watch.”
# XIAO
where: your forehead!
why: he just thinks it is less embarrassing than trying to kiss you on the lips openly + less chances of him getting denied the kiss.
His expression was rather dark as you stood in front of one another. It looked like he was thinking deeply about something but you brushed it off, assuming it was just his way of sulking since you two were about to split for the night.
“I packed you some Almond Tofu, so you can eat some on your way back. I also got you a jacket to wear since it might be a little cold in the evening. I know you don’t sleep and stuff, so I just wanted to make sure you were okay.” Your rambling about his well-being wasn’t new to him, which is why he didn’t interrupt you. He watched with the same dark expression that seemed scary but if you looked closely, you would see just how soft those eyes had become after spending so much time with a “mere human” like you.
Grasping you by the back of you head, he pulled you forward and leaned in briskly, kissing your forehead softly before pulling away and turning around. You barely had a second to recover as he adjusted his mask on his face and disappeared from your sight, muttering nothing but a simple, “be careful.”
You smiled at the tingling sensation on you skin, knowing he had only escaped to avoid feeling any type of emotion after kissing you so brazenly. As mean as Xiao seemed, he really was a simpleton with you.
# XINGQIU
where: the back of your hand!
why: do i have to explain?
“Xingqiu, where are we going?” You asked with a tired smile on your lips as you allowed yourself to be dragged along this upward slope with no set destination in mind. The boy simply laughed, pulling you faster until you were nearly tripping over your own feet. By the time you had planned to complain once more, he came to an abrupt stop and you almost bumped into his body if it wasn’t for your quick senses. “Where are we?”
“Take a look, my liege. Quite fascinating, is it not?” He said as he took a seat on the branch perched on the top of the hill, big enough for the two of them to sit on. You plopped beside him, admiring the sun that was beginning to set while Xingqiu opened a book to the page he had left off on.
“My life seems fulfilled when I am sat here with a book in my hands and you by my side. Don’t you agree?” HIs words were sincere, surprisingly void of that mischievous tone he usually had these days.
“I’m not particularly fond of books like you, but I am extremely fond of you. So, yes, I do agree.” You said with a cheesy smile, leaning in his direction. The boy abruptly stood up, and you rose an eyebrow in confusion.
Bending his body slightly, he held out his hand to you until you placed yours on top of his. Once you did so, he pressed his lips to the back of your hand and flashed you an easy smile. “With this, I owe my life to you, my liege. A vow much greater than marriage.”
# ZHONGLI
where: your lips!
why: I legit couldn’t think of a non-lips spot so i gave up. mans just likes the way your lips taste like his favorite wine. two good things.
He admired his cup with bright eyes, absolute taken with the way it tasted on his tongue and hadn’t changed in all these years. It was a beautiful emotion that was a mixture of happiness and nostalgia, plus a bit of romance considering he was here with the one he loved.
“What do you think?” Zhongli asked, eyes full of curiosity as he turned in your direction. You hadn’t said anything all night and he assumed you weren’t enjoying the wine he had presented to you so happily.
On contrary, it was way too good to be wasted, so you chose to drink it slowly in order to savor the beautiful taste that somehow reminded you of Zhongli himself. Maybe it was because he talked about this wine too much.
“It tastes good,” you murmur, leaning into his side to gain a bit of warmth from the male who shared the emotion, leaning into your touch.
You glanced up at him, smiling softly when you already saw his eyes on you. “Stop staring so impolitely. Where are your manners?” You asked jokingly, giggling softly when Zhongli looked down and chuckled.
Leaning in, he cupped your cheek and smashed your lips together. He could taste the Osmanthus wine on you and it nearly made him melt into the kiss that he had long suppressed.
When he pulled away, a small smile settled into his lips, satisfaction in his eyes. “Osmanthus wine tastes the same as I remember.”
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a/n: finally, I finished it. im going to bed now uhhdhfjf (idk if i’ll ever do other characters but we’ll see)
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hareharrison · 3 years ago
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hold me
pairing: george harrison x reader
summary: george is in the process of finishing abbey road, and has been repeatedly coming home frustrated. instead of talking to you about it, he distances himself completely, and only speaks to you in annoyance or anger, and lashes out on you. he doesn’t know how much it affects you and one day comes home to the effects firsthand.
warnings: hurt/comfort, angst, angy geo, neurodivergent reader, invasive thoughts, mental breakdown/panic attack, but it works out in the end
a/n: hayyyy ok so i wrote this as a comfort fic for myself, and i decided to post it cause why not. i struggle with intense fear of abandonment cause of bpd haha fun 😐and wanted to make it from the POV of a neurodivergent reader?? so this is like a comfort fic for ND readers?? idk if i need to put any other potential trigger warnings for this but if i do please lmk and i will fix it
year: 1969
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the flat was quiet without him. to be honest, it was quiet with or without him, lately. as much as you didn’t want to admit it, george had been distant. he was always a quiet person, but he has never dismissed you this much. you knew that his job could be tiring and you tried not to overthink it, but you couldn’t help but feel bad. a voice in your head was planting horrible ideas, saying things like, “you fucked up, he doesn’t like you anymore, you’re annoying.” but still, you pushed on and tried your best to ignore the noise in your brain.
you sigh heavily and slide back into the couch. you had the next two days off of work, and nothing to do. george of course had to work on your days off, which left you alone at home. with your thoughts. it was hard getting through today, your intrusive thoughts were particularly loud... but he would be home any minute now, which brought on a bit of hope; seeing him should rid you of your own jailhoused mind.
the tv played some sitcom in front of you, which you had no interest in. all you could think about was if you ruined things. what if he was thinking of leaving you? it would be your fault... and yet you couldn’t think of a single thing you’ve ever done that might have hurt him.
the door opened gently and let in a cool draft that brushed against your warm skin. you look toward the entrance, seeing your george sigh heavily with exhaustion as he took his shoes and coat off. he looked up to you, his boldly furrowed brows softening.
“hi, love,” he says, walking toward you. you stand and approach him to greet him with a quick kiss. he holds you for a little longer than usual, and you take the opportunity to melt into his arms and breathe in his smell, something you’d been deprived of recently. he rests his chin on top of your head, which laid comfortably on his rising chest. it was moments like this that made all your worries slip away, moments like this that you wished you could cling onto forever and ever.
“how was your day?” you ask, finally leaning back to look up at him. he lets go of you and runs a hand through his long hair.
“not good,” he says, a frown on his perfectly sculpted face. you return his expression at the sight of him being sad. quickly, you remember your dinner ideas. maybe that would cheer him up.
“hey, maybe we can go get something to eat? maybe get your mind off of things?” you suggest, looking up at his brown eyes. he looks down at you, eyes full of regret.
“i’m sorry love, but i’d rather just head to bed already,” he says remorsefully. you smile softly and reassure him that it’s okay and he should get some rest. but part of you breaks inside, knowing he doesn’t want to spend time with you.
he headed upstairs and you followed, the painful ideas returning at full speed.
“you’re so annoying, of course he doesn’t want to spend any time with you. you’re so annoying and clingy,” your brain says and you flinch at the harsh thoughts. through your entire bedtime routine, thoughts flooded your mind and filled your entire being up, and you felt like you were being drowned from the inside out. george stood next to you as you both brushed your teeth, not speaking a single word to you or giving you a single glance. you changed into one of george’s t-shirts and watched as he slid out of his clothes and into his pajamas in seconds. he muttered a monotone, “good night,” before turning on his side, his back facting you.
as much as you didn’t want to, you believed the mean voices and hung your head as you got into bed next to george.
you slept back to back that night.
————————————————————
the sun seeped into your room through your windows, and invaded your bed, waking you rather unpleasantly. you groan lightly as you reached over your bed for george, but only found empty space. his side of the bed was cold, indicating that he’d been up for a while now.
you sit up slowly, rubbing your eyes as the aromas of freshly brewed coffee and morning dew hit your senses. you hear the song of the early birds chirping as your feet hit the cool floor. as you head downstairs, you can hear george on the phone, and you soon see him muttering softly before taking a long drag from his cigarette. you don’t bother him, seeing that there was paperwork on the table and his call must be business related. naturally, you decide to head for the coffee, the smell luring you in like a fish.
you poured the hot, dark liquid into your favorite mug and add in your preferred amounts of cream and sugar. looking out the window, you see water drip gently from the leaves of a tree that george and you had planted a year ago. you sip your coffee and reminisce about the times you used to actually spend time with george. how nice it was, seeing him smile so often.
you suddenly hear george raise his voice at the phone, something unlike him entirely. you jump at the unpleasant sound before peeking through the hallway to see what on earth was happening.
“no, i don’t care! i want the bloody bastard fired, in fact, tell him not to bother showing up today,” he shouts into the phone before slamming it down, placing his head between his knees and groaning in frustration. seeing george this upset and acting out on it was truly a rare sighting, and you thought carefully about what to next.
after careful consideration, you tiptoe into the room and gently rest a hand on his shoulder, the sudden contact making him flinch.
“christ, (y/n) are you trying to give me a bloody heart attack?” he grumbles before lighting another cigarette.
“sorry,” you say softly, “would you like some tea?” you figure it could calm his anger and soothe some of his abnormal irritability.
“what? tea? there’s already coffee made,” he says rudely. you take a step back, saying nothing. you know that you didn’t do anything and that this behavior would pass. george was never like this. your eyes find the time and see that george should have left ten minutes ago.
“george, you’re gonna be late to work,” you say, thinking you could at least do something helpful. his head snaps back at you and his once soft face turned hard with anger.
“what are you implying? you want me gone?” he stands up and angrily grabs all of the papers scattered on the table, shoving them into a folder and the folder into his bag, “fine, i’ll leave. im out the door.”
you look at him in confusion, you’d barely woken up and were just trying to help, “what’s the matter with you?”
“what’s the matter with me,” he repeats, looking away and scoffing. he runs his hand through his hair in frustration, “im sick of this, (y/n)! im sick of life. i come home exhausted and you have half a mind to ask me if i want to talk about it!”
“you always want to go straight to bed,” you defend yourself, hurt that he would even suggest that you don’t care about him. his dark eyes glare into your own for a moment that feels like hours, trying to think of somethig clever to say in response, but he just wasn’t ever much of a fighter. he finally chooses to put his cigarette out on the table’s ashtray and grab his coat. if you wanted him out of the house, he was more than happy to comply.
“george-“ you start.
“no,” he cuts you off, “don’t say anything right now, i can’t even look at you.” and he doesn’t, he ignores your presence entirely as he picks up his bag and walks out the door.
you’re left in the cold house, alone, hurt, and dumbfounded. you couldn’t believe what had just happened. you couldn’t believe that george, your george, had taken his anger out on you, simply for trying to help his morning be less shitty. worse than that, he thought you wanted him gone, when all you wanted was to be with him. is this how it was going to be now? a bitter, loveless relationship? your eyes sting with fresh tears at the thought, and a huge lump in your throat grows painfully. you take a deep breath before heading upstairs. you wanted anything but to cry this early in the morning, and the only reason you got up somewhat early was to see george before he left to work. now that your morning was ruined, you figured heading back to bed was the next best thing.
you climb back into your shared bed, suppressing your emotions with the warmth of your fluffy blankets and soft pillows. the comfort of a bed felt almost like a hug, and you sighed, letting the pain drift away as you fell asleep.
————————————————————
when you opened your eyes, the realization hit you. you’d slept until the sun began to set, completely ignoring your emotions, stuffing them down inside of you like an overflowing trash can. being awake made them fling right back at you; sleeping didn’t change a thing, and was only a temporary pause in your pain.
all of your feelings came back to you at once, and it once again felt like you were drowning internally. only this time, the thoughts weren’t the invasive factor. your emotions were overwhelmingly intense on top of your brain practically screaming horrible things to you. your breathing quickens as you feel tears slide down your face. this time you werent able to swallow the thick lump in your throat, and you began to weep softly.
this was it, george was leaving you. he hates you, he wants nothing to do with you. there was nothing you could do but hug your knees and cry. you choked on a sob and started rocking back and forth in attempts to try to soothe yourself. but you couldn’t stop, it felt like your entire world was falling apart. you soon began to have shortness of breath and struggled with your breathing, feeling your heart beat at an intense rate that you couldn’t control.
your bedroom door opens, revealing george’s early arrival. he immediately rushes to your side, afraid to touch you but wanting so bad to comfort you.
“(y/n)? (y/n), breathe. breathe, baby,” he takes your hand and you look at him. you aren’t sure if him being here is making the situation better or worse. seeing him try to help you stirred all kinds of feelings in your mind. you felt like you weren’t good enough for him, like you didn’t deserve his help.
george begins breathing in through his nose and out of his mouth, gently guiding you and hoping you will try to do the same. he sits in front of you on the bed and holds your face in his gentle hands. you look up into his eyes, the chocolate features of his face soothing you as your breath began to steady.
“that’s it,” he encourages.
“do you hate me?” you cry softly.
“what? no, (y/n), i’d give my life for yours, do you know that? you’re so, very special to me,” he slides over to sit beside you on the bed and wraps his long arms around you.
“why are you so distant?” you look up at him, and tears continue to roll down your flushed cheeks, “you acted so mean to me this morning, i feel like you want nothing to do with me.”
george is hurt by your words. he truly didn’t mean to be distant, and he never wanted to hurt you.
“i’m sorry,” he says, “ive been so overwhelmed i haven’t stopped to think of how you must feel. im really sorry my love i never meant to hurt you like this.” he embraces you tightly and you give into his comforting touch, wrapping your arms around his torso and digging your face into his chest. 
you take a deep breath, “i understand,” you say before looking up to him to whisper, “i miss you. i miss us.”
“i miss you too darling,” he pauses for a moment, “how about i take tomorrow off? we can do whatever you’d like.”
you sniffle, “what about the album? the deadline?” 
“i can fake sick. nothing is more important to me than you,” he says, “i want nothing more than to be with you. i love you so much.”
you smile when he presses a soft kiss to your aching head, “now how about we go have something to eat? i’m starved.”
345 notes · View notes
everafterkeiji · 4 years ago
Note
ah! ok, um, is it ok if i request a hc with any of the hq and bnha boys ur comfortable writing for (u can do however many u feel like :)) with an s/o who’s scared of the dark? maybe add a little something about one of them getting glow in the dark stars for y/n’s room and saying that the stars are there in the dark to protect them? idk if that’s cheesy or not lol but yeah, i’m afraid i’m a bit of a scaredy-cat myself so i rush into my room as fast as i can when turning off the lights hehe. anyways, take ur time and take care of yourself ily <33
A/N: and I'm back- im v sorry for taking so long but I'll be posting the haikyuu one in another part but thank you so much for requesting kate love u v much mwah ʕ´• ᴥ•̥`ʔ
BNHA Boys Reacting to Y/N being afraid of the dark!
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𝐈𝐙𝐔𝐊𝐔 𝐌𝐈𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐘𝐀 will not hesitate to visit your room often as he could and provides light in the best of ways.
When he first found out, he deeply understood and offered to walk you on your way home when it was getting a little too late from training then he soon found himself nervously knocking your door in the middle of the night to see how you're doing.
"Hey- it's very late but are you o-okay?" He asks, a hand to the back of his neck with worried eyes as you stare at him with a smile- a little embarrassed that you were face to face with him in your sleep wear.
"Honestly, I couldn't sleep properly." You answered while he frowns, upset that you were probably up all night. With an idea lighting up in his mind, he speaks.
"I'll be back okay? Leave the door open for me. I'm just going to get something." He says with a smile while you nodded while he dashes off looking excited. You proceeded to your bed waiting for him, enjoying the light that the open door gave you. A few minutes pass and a panting Deku with multiple objects in hand. You chuckled at the sight while you let him in as he closes the door before letting a flashlight lit the room.
"What's all this?" You asked, pointing to the materials laid out on your bed while a blush creeps up on the boys cheek.
"I thought that I could make more of those light up stars to help you sleep better." Izuku says while your heart flutters at his comment.
"Let's do it then."
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𝐊𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐊𝐈 𝐁𝐀𝐊𝐔𝐆𝐎 will be your night light and he'll also be the type to wait until you were asleep so he can make sure you're safe with him.
"What is it- oi stop moving around." Bakugo says while you shuffle in your sheets as your boyfriend questions your nervousness. Was it because it was your first night together? Fair enough, he hasn't known about that fear of yours but he's beginning to put the pieces all at once when he feels your grip on him tighten.
"Sheesh, it's just darkness." He says scoffing before you roll your eyes, pushing him off jokingly while you let your eyes close trying to ease the anxiety.
Seeing that you turned away from him, he sighs before pulling you to him, nudging you with his elbow.
"Look at this." He says while he sits up and you following his actions. The palm of his emits light, surprising you with the sound of a tiny explosion. He continues to hold it out in front of you, seeing the darkness of your room fade being replaced in orange tinted shadows.
"Bakugo- you don't have to do this. I'll be fine." You assured him so he doesn't overuse his quirk before classes. Although it was a small spark, you knew better than to keep him from resting.
"Stop lying. Just.. sleep. I'll be here anyways." The last bit of his sentence trailed off as if he was nervous to show his concern but sighing in defeat, you laid down slinging an arm over his waist, cuddling up on his side enjoying his warmth. You smile at him before speaking.
"Thank you, Katsuki." You bid him before closing your eyes while he sighs as well, wrapping his free arm around your shoulder watching you fall quietly.
He stares at the dirty light up stars on your room while he takes a mental note to remove them since he was always up to help you.
Once he feels how deep in slumber you were, the explosions from his hands die down while he lies with you slowly, careful to not wake you.
He looks at your sleeping state before sighing remembering that you feared this dark room. He then plants a swift kiss on your hair, looking at you once again.
"I'll be right here every day."
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𝐄𝐈𝐉𝐈𝐑𝐎 𝐊𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐀 would simply let you fall asleep to his nightly stories to make sure your mind doesn't fall on the hands of fear.
"Then Bakugo taught me how to dodge the attack without using my quirk then use my agility instead!" Kirishima rants following some hand movements as you chuckle with you on his chest as he carries on. He feels how your grip has loosened compared to how it was when he first got in bed with you.
With his endless stories, he too notices how your eyes grew heavy.
"Too tired from today?" He asks softly, his hands lost in your hair making it harder to stay awake.
"Not really. I just stayed up too long cause I- got scared." He looks at you with concern, while he intertwines your hands with his.
"Scared of what babe?"
"Is it silly if I say the dark?" He blinks for a second but then he shakes his head before pulling you closer to him before landing a loving kiss to your temple.
"It's never silly, bub. Your savior is here!" He says proudly, a cheeky grin making you laugh as you hold onto him more, closing your eyes as he smiles at the sight of you. From this day onwards, it seems like he's got a new mission but this mission was way easier and more important than the rest because he'd save you thousands of times before seeing you scared to wits.
"You sure are a hero, Eiji."
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𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐎𝐃𝐑𝐎𝐊𝐈 would mindlessly offer his embrace.
After seeing how quick you were to run to your room on heavy hours of training when the sun got down, he wondered too much about you. It was either you had your own plans or maybe a certain villain was out to capture you. Both options still got him curious.
So the next day of training and learning about which weaknesses of yours could be encountered in a fight, he hears an answer from you that might have gained his interest on you more.
"I prefer to avoid fights when it's dark." You said to Momo, Shoto looks at you with raised eyebrows but he understood either way. If he had his own fears that got in his way, he's sure that yours can get in your way too. Knowing you two share the same liking to each other, he decided to step up and find a solution to lessen your fear.
So when he was right at your door, knocking lightly, he thinks if his phone provided him with the correct answers.
"Todoroki? Hi, what are you doing here?" You asked him, pulling him softly inside your room while he looks around seeing stars decorating the place. He mentally checks off one of the options seeing that you already bought some of them to ease the fear a bit.
"I overheard you with Yaoyorozu and I'm here to help with this. "
"With—"
You were cut off by the tall boy engulfing you in a sweet embrace with his chin on the crown of your head as his hands were placed on your waist as he disregards his racing heartbeat seeing that he put zero hesitation in doing the top option in his research.
"It's okay to be scared of the dark." he assures you, but your focus wasn't on his words— it was on the fact that held you this close and that he knew about your fear. You were thankful that he didn't think it was childish or pathetic but you were too busy thinking about how his first way of showing his concern was like this.
With that, you hugged him back and with his closed eyes, you two had smiles tugged on your lips.
"Thank you, Shoto."
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𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐊𝐈 𝐊𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐑𝐈 lets your laugh echo through the room making you forget about all your worries.
Denki has always been charismatic when it comes to you. No matter how many jokes he threw, funny or not, you'd always smile or give him a reaction that he loves to receive but all jokes were sent aside when you mentioned your fear of darkness.
You brought up the topic when Sero had sparked up the conversation of what you hated the most and when you said yours, Kaminari was all ears and his mind began running on how to make things a little better for you. It must've been hard, he thinks. Darkness was everywhere so he had to help.
After some exhaustion from training and frustration from battling with Bakugo, he can tell how you were on edge as you went straight to your room after dinner. He knew sleeping peacefully wasn't going to be easy to accomplish today so he let his feet guide him to your room right when he finished his meal.
"Denki here!" He says while knocking. You open the door and he sees how you've wrapped yourself in a blanket, but your eyes bared no sign that you slept.
"Hey Kami, what're you doing here?" You asked him while he enters your room, pouting at how your lamp had flickering lights meaning it's energy was about to fail you. So, he walks right over to the lamp and places his hand on top of it and uses his quirk to make sure the light doesn't flicker anymore. Seeing that it was working properly again, he realizes he didn't want to leave yet.
"Oh thanks, Denki." You said smiling at him while he sits on your bed with an idea coming to his mind.
"I've got a story to tell!"
And a few minutes later, you've got yourself beside him with his arm draped on your shoulder while your laugh became too loud mixed with his making your sleepiness fade.
"Okay okay but you've got to sleep, Y/N. Don't overwork yourself tomorrow or else." He says with a chuckle while you laid down as he gets off your bed.
"Or else what Denki?"
"You'll find out tomorrow." he says, while you bid him goodnight. He comes closer to you just when you close your eyes as he gives a peck to your cheek while blushing furiously when your eyes opened at his actions. He immediately walks away muttering a quick good night as you chuckled when he sprints to the door making you turn off your lamp with a smile.
"Goodnight, Y/N."
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9tzuyu · 4 years ago
Text
children of tragedy (rewrite)
note: heyo, rewriting an old fic of mine. i hope to be able to rewrite all 5 chapters quickly. if you guys don’t like it, i won’t continue because its kinda dark and idk i feel like no ones gonna like it anyways. please leave feedback though, im on my knees begging for validation. also sorry if its ooc, please forgive me.
++ sorry the beginning reveals how rusty my writing is </3
(*** i wrote this as as a fem reader fic because it worked easier with how i wrote things.)
+ please remember that this is purely a way to get out my own feelings/struggles in a healthy way. also i’m sure this works better as a ship fic, but someone asked for this version so yeah :).
** mistakes are mine im too tired and lazy to proofread right now.
warnings: talk of alcohol abuse, slight mention of domestic abuse.
🏷 @peggycarter-steverogers
ch.2 | ch.3
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[love, fragility, and the memories that eat us alive.]
meeting wanda changed everything for you. she wasn't like anyone you’d ever known. she was always kind, never quick to lose her temper or scream and yell at you for things you couldn't possibly control. she was warm, tender with everything she did.
your relationship with her was very new to you. it was much different in comparison to your past experiences — and you weren't quite sure what to think of it. there was no doubt that you appreciated her and everything she did for you, but you were still waiting for her to snap. it was almost like a need burning throughout your body. being able to grasp the idea that someone could ever really, truly be gentle with you was out of the question. in turn, you’d push all of her buttons, hoping that she would get mad enough and get it over with.
no one could really fault you for it. the steady stream of abuse was the nearly the entirety of your life, both physical and mental.
lately wanda was having to pick you up from wherever she could find you, most of the time in the alleyways of of bars you’d been kicked from.
once you were drunk enough (anyone really) you weren’t afraid to say the first thing that came to your mind, offensive or not – which meant it was no surprise when you’d been involved in fights. the alcohol numbed a majority of the pain anyway, so didn’t really make much of a difference to you.
with this happening so many times, you figured wanda would be angry with you – perhaps so angry she would find it within her to hit you. but each and every time wanda brought you home, she made sure you were comfortable before tending to your inuries.
what you didn't know was that being so worried for you all the time, every second of everyday, was beginning to take a toll on her. wanda only wanted to fix you, but you were making it more than difficult for her to do that.
she knew very little about your past, simply because you didn't like talking about it and she didn't want to push. but there was no denying the fact that wanda was curious.
sometimes she would ask questions, only between the soft moments the both of you shared. much to her dismay, most of her curiosities were turned down. on the rare occasions you shared brighter memories of your childhood, wanda would bookmark them in the back of her head.
no harm would ever come from her, but you didn’t know that. at least not right now.
too many times had your exes used the trust you’d so politely given against you. to be fair with wanda though, you shared only the brightest parts of your childhood. they were very seldom, but the ones you could remember were the ones you enjoyed talking about the most. 
despite her limited knowledge, it wasn’t hard for her to tell that you’d already been hurt plenty of times before. apart from the fact that wanda was overall truly a good person, it made her even more gentle with you than she’d ever been with anyone before. 
on top of that, wanda wasn’t stupid. she picked up on every little flinch you tried to hide, or the times you had to ask her if it was okay if you could do something on your own free will, and she definitely didn’t forget about the countless times you berated yourself over small, humanly mistakes. a frown never failed to decorate her face when these things happened. 
wanda tried her hardest to make it known how much she loved you, and how she would never intentionally hurt you. she never once lifted a hand on you or raised her voice in the slightest, even when she felt like she’d met a breaking point.
the last few weeks seemed to be putting more stress on her than usual. the gashes on your body seemed to be cutting deeper and the bruises on your jaw and rib cage were beginning to turn a darker shade of indigo as each fight became more aggressive. your knuckles had been swollen, irritated to the point your hands trembled when your palms were held open.  
you completely missed how drastically wanda’s mood had changed. she became quiet, seemingly lost in thought most of the time until she needed to take care of you. she grew tired, a purple tint claiming a spot below the lip of her eyes. fifteen pounds of weight had shredded from her body and her head grew dizzy every time she stood up. none of that mattered to wanda though, you were her number one priority.
alcohol was the biggest issue in the way. if wanda could get you to stop drinking for just one night she might be able to reason with you. 
the brunette knew that was out of the question though, because she knew no matter how many times she told or expressed her love for you, you wouldn’t stop until you wanted to, not when she wanted you to. 
you never allowed yourself to be vulnerable around her, so she never knew how you truly felt about the things going wrong in your life. there was an unbearable amount of pain when it came to confronting what you tried so hard to push away. the idea of allowing yourself to heal, to mourn the things taken away from you caused a lump in the back of your throat. living in denial was the easiest way to cope - that was as long as you could bear the damage it created.
 (and whether wanda knew it or not, knowing that you were causing her so much misery was the worst feeling you’d ever faced. all she had ever given you was love and in return she was met with destruction.)
so once again you found yourself walking alone, a slight stagger between steps. it was cold, each breath exhaled from your lips could be seen vaporizing into the air. every movement ripped what balance you thought you’d gained right out from underneath you. the feeling of numbness in your fingertips brought your attention away from the fact that you didn’t know where you were. 
the buildings all looked familiar, but everything was hazy. being drunk wasn’t always the fun everyone bragged about. too tired to carry on, you found yourself slumped in the back of an alleyway next to a dirty garbage bin. it reeked of sour, expired food, but you’d given up on caring about anything else other than trying to drink yourself numb. 
your mind began to wander. flashes of early mornings with wanda’s hands wrapped around your waist, breath tickling the back of your neck while the sun began to rise started filling your thoughts. the warm feeling wanda gave you outweighed every bad emotion you could possibly think of.
but as you stared at the ground beneath your feet things began to spiral. your throat contracted, the guilt you tried so hard to swallow began clawing its way out of your body.
(and holy fuck you could not deal with this right now.)
you curled your head between your legs in an attempt to shield yourself away from something that was born from the inside.
it was too much.
without a chance to stop what was happening, your stomach began heaving. a mix of bile and alcohol drooled from your mouth as you continued to vomit.
you missed the sound of footsteps coming from behind you. the feeling of a hand on your shoulder caused you to jerk back, slamming your back into the brick wall.
“hey, hey, it’s me. you’re okay. it’s just me, wanda.” she cooed.
through teary eyes, you looked up at the woman in front of you.
she’s your girlfriend.
(but you weren’t sure that you deserved to call her that after everything you’ve put her through.)
“what are you doing here?” your voice wavered as you wiped your mouth free of excess vomit. you sniffled backing away from her.
she tilted her head, desperate to read what your eyes would give away. “i’m here to bring you back home. can you stand up for me?” you shook your head. you were too exhausted and dizzy from the alcohol to even think about standing.
“that’s okay,” she whispered. “here, i’m going to pick you up, okay? wrap your arms around my neck and your legs around my hips.”
“mkay.” your speech was still slurred, but at that point all wanda cared about was getting you home safe.
you didn’t remember the ride home or wanda carrying you out of the car to lay you on the couch. by the time she got the supplies she needed to wrap and tend to your wounds, you were completely passed out.
when you woke up you were greeted with a glass of water and an over the counter pain medication. you swallowed the pills and moved to set the glass on the coffee table, but wanda beat you to it and took it out of your hands. she smiled down at you, taking a seat next to you. she tucked your hair behind your ears, giving your face one last gentle stroke.
thats when you noticed her eyes were red.
you immediately sat up, crossing your legs and moved closer to her. you’d hoped to comfort her somehow, but the shake of her head broke sonething inside you.
you bit your lip, anxiety shooting throughout your body. she sensed your nervousness and took your hands in hers, rubbing circles on the outside of your wrist with her thumbs.
“i love you, you know that. at least i hope you do,” she let out a soft laugh. “but i can’t keep doing this.”
your heart dropped, and you could feel the all too familiar feeling of guilt building its way back up. you tried to speak, but wanda cut you off.
“i need you to hear this.”
when you didn’t respond she took the opportunity to continue saying what she needed to get out.
“i have exhausted myself to a breaking point. i can’t keep worrying about you every single night you’re gone. i can’t be there every time you need saving. i’m losing myself.”
she paused to check and see how you were handling her words. for once you weren’t shutting down. you were genuinely trying to process what she was trying to say.
(and she was so proud of you for that. she almost considered giving you another chance. but she knew for the better, she couldn’t do that. not to you, not to her.)
“i’ve packed your things. you can leave tomorrow morning if you wish, i don’t mind having you for another meal or two.”
she squeezed your hands and got up from the couch, allowing you to take in what she said. it was in that moment when you realized that even when she’d finally drawn the line, had enough, she didn’t yell at you. she wasn’t angry, she was just sad.
you were chasing after something that wasn’t there, and it never would be there.
and now you were able to register just how much you’d fucked up the one good thing in your life.
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kiwibirbs-library · 4 years ago
Text
Before and After Rituals
a/n: hi I hope yall like Imma make this a series with the schools so      mauh <3
pairings: karasuno x reader
warning: I’m pretty sure this is all clean if not feel free to say something. 
summary: the boy’s before and after game things that they do with you
seijoh || nekoma || fukurodani || shiratorizawa
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Daichi Sawamura
the night before a game you always go over to his house with some meat buns and either stay for a while or spend the night
he always holds onto you in some way
it calms him down 
its not anything big but it gives him a good sense of peace and quiet before chaos
after his game you always wait for him outside the gym, win or lose
he goes with his team back to the school and you meet him there too
you either go to his house or yours and one of you spends the night just to calm down his head
you always get snacks and even if he tells you to not get to much junk you always get to much and he doesn’t stop you
if he won then you talk about the next match and his thoughts on the team
he’ll also spin you around when he sees you outside the gym
idk he loves doing it
if he lost than he’ll start on things he needs to do better on and you’ll try and cheer him up with some corny jokes and kithes.
Sugawara Koshi
all the morning before the game you two are attached at the hip. 
everyone is just used to you “sneaking” onto the bus to drive with them
in reality him trying and failing horribly to cover you with his jacket and coach just giving up on it
constant quiet giggles at first as you try and calm his nerves
then around the end its more quiet and serious as he focuses a little more
after the game he naps on you the whole way home
if he wins you get to listen to his rambling about some idea he had on signals he could use or a set up he wants to try
he could literally talk for hours on what he was thinking wall watching and playing its so adorable
if he loses then theres a aura of sadness in the bus and if its bad enough he’ll muffle his small sniffs into your shoulder
that hasn’t happen except for date tech and sejioh though and your happy for that
you always sleep over after the game
always
Asahi Azumane
before the game welcome to teddy bear time
noya constant teasing for a week straight since the big dork is constantly on you freaking out
normally its not to bad and a lot of it is just of how scare he is that his spikes will get blocked a lot and the comments he’s sure to receive about his looks when he gets there
when game day does come you always kiss his cheek and hold his face to tell him good luck
def earning gags from tssuki but you didn’t hear it from me
after the game its like teddy bear time x10
win or lose you get a new weighted blanket for a couple of days
if he wins its a more happy blanket yes but he’s so exhausted that he just falls asleep on you the minute you meet him at his house after they left for the bus
plus a bunch of random ‘holy crap wait i did that?!”’s to himself throughout the day
if he loses he cries a little, blaming himself for the entire thing
you always tell him that its not his fault and that he did his best
he’s honestly so pessimistic the night after and your one it telling him that he needs to remember how it feels but not let it bring him down
you bring him up with those comments and he’s so grateful for it
Nishinoya Yuu
every time the day before a game he likes to go somewhere with you
weather it be the park, the arcade, an ice cream shop
a freaking pet shop (yes you almost got a pet that day)
he finds it relaxing to see you having a nice time with him and every time he always makes sure its a place to make you smile
after the game he’s a koala on you, win or lose
the only real difference is happy koala or sad koala
happy koala is randomly kissing you and laughing, nuzzling into you while Tanaka either gags or whines about how single he feels
sad koala is sniffling into your shoulder and clinging to you even more if its possible, hes pretty quiet too so you know hes waiting until you get home to talk about everything
course after that mini pout session hes all fighting and ready to see that team again and win
either one also ends with a cuddle movie night until like 2am
also unrelated but like he’s so freaking hot when he receives so always tell him that
Tanaka Ryuunosuke
ok ok this boy omg 
so before the game its MAJOR sucking up to you
literally after a while you’ll get more used to it and get what kinds of attention he wants but like at first its just a lot of complements and stares and draping
literally ennoshita is stretched so thin the week before hand by it all
no one even understands why he’s sucking up to you other than him, you (after a little), and ennoshita
he just wants you to return the energy
after the game all depends on winning or loosing
if the win he will always, without fail, kiss you like a million times all over your face when he sees you next
does not matter if its outside the gym or if its when he gets back to the school or what
every time
if they lose, well you now have a very sad puppy on your hands
mentally during a game he’s like no one you’ve never met but when he gets home and has sometime to think its all a bunch of ‘i could have done better’ and ‘i should have done better’ s
you are constantly reassuring him thats he’ll do it next time and that its not his fault
BACK RUBS ARE BIG WITH HIM AND YOU CANT TELL ME NO
but win or lose yall’s main thing is a movie and snack night
after that he’s really to go the next morning and beat up some volleyballs lol
Ennoshita Chikara
lol he’s the most chill i think
before the match he’s really calm
bb doesn’t think he’s gunna play but like he’s ready
honestly though the biggest switch is that he’s an even bigger cuddle bug than before
like he keeps it together at school but hangouts? coming over?
ha
better have gone to the bathroom before cause you’re not moving for the next couple hours
it’s like it calms him down after practice enough to think over what he needs to work on
after the game is the same no matter win or lose
every.single.time. he will always have a sit down with you to talk about what happened during the game
like quick nap, the meeting, then off to your house to go over the pros and cons on the game
he always has the moments when he thinks he’s not worth it to be put in the game but you always just ruffle his hair and tell him thats the furtherest from truth he could get
Kageyama Tobio
OH MY GOD YAY MY BOO
sorry anyways
so before a game he gets kinda quiet
normally he likes to chat about stuff that went on in practice or how hinata pissed him off that day while yall are sprawled on his couch
but he gets quiet the week before and just has that look on his face
you know the look
the ‘grumble grumble’ one
you always poke between his eyebrows and poke at him to make sure he doesn’t go to far into his thoughts
the night before its like a switch flips and hes muttering to himself like crazy on something he might be able to do with his sets
after a game is another win or lose situation
winning means you get little kid mode kageyama
literally his eyes sparkle at everything he enjoys afterward
milk
rewatching his match
anything you freaking do, all that
plus napping, a lot of napping
losing is sad to watch
he sort of goes back a few steps in the social department and goes robot mode
you both will camp out on his couch, his head buried in your lap or shoulder
if its bad enough he cries a little
you always sleep over no matter what
Hinata Shoyo
SHOYOOO
alright this boy before the game is normally fairly daily ngl
you get normal bouncy sunshine that will follow you anywhere and everywhere all the time
but the night before you get meditation mode where he sets out his game stuff and sits there for like half an hour
first time this happened you got scared for him cause he never sits still that long
NEVER
now though you just sorta hang on his bed watching him cause its cute
after the game is the biggest depending there is out of the rest
if he wins he is bouncing of the walls after a little nap
when you finally get him home he’ll have you throw the ball back and forth for like an hour before you call it and make him lay down or eat or something
if he loses its like he lost all his energy for a little while
he tries to fall asleep but cant due to a replay of something he did wrong
you always run your hand through his hair and try to calm him down
calm down as in cheer up not energy
at least until someone says something (usually tanaka) that gets him on another energy high to beat them next time
you always sleep over though it just happens so often that it became normal
Tssukishima Kei
before is fairly normal im ngl
he doesn’t do to much out of the ordinary
I like to think he’s a heck tone more affectionate in private 
his before game time isn’t anything special though 
he does come with you to the store to get snacks with yamaguchi more often tho so
thats something
after a game is really calm and slow
once again I think he’s a lot more affectionate in private so you lay on him while hes on his phone to calm down
half the time its calming you down since you were freaking out more than him
but same difference
this is what happens win or lose though
like if they lose and he tried he might lay on you instead but its normally just like that
honestly thinking of him being more affectionate in private just makes me fall for him ahhhhhh hate this but anyways
Tadashi Yamaguchi
this boy good lord
so before a game he literally shaking 
like he was fine the whole week but the day before he’s slowly freaking out more and more
tssuki will laugh at him while your trying your best to talk him out of his up coming panic attack that might come
a good light smack on his back and a cheek kiss is good enough to get him distracted fro thinking to much though
after a game is always the same thing unless he screwed up a serve really bad
you two always go to the store and gets some snacks and them go to his house and just talk about anything ad everything
if he wins its normally about the game but when he loses you bring up random things to cheer him up
if he messed up he’ll get quiet and just lay on you for hours
but you know that if you can get something about his amazing improvement he’ll eventually brighten up
bb just wants some love (that doesn’t mean you don’t smack him upside the head when he makes fun of someone tho 
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a/n: im sorry for not doing  kinoshita and narita i dont know them good enough since im not that far into season four to write for them. plus i think ennoshita is oc but thats ok i think
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