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ziminy · 1 year ago

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Nightshift pt. 1

Having them as roommates was a problem

Tags: mdni, college au, f!reader , explicit language, a little bit of misunderstandings here and there for the plot, everyone is pretty dumb, inexperienced!reader, size difference, they toy with you the way they want, fingering, thigh fucking, both Geto and Gojo are playboys (cuz I want so) , idk I'll add it later if I missed something

Author's note: bro, I started writing this thinking it would be a small ff. I was giggling and kicking my feet and then I woke up 10k words in and I was like, nahh, gotta make this into a series. So enjoy reading this just as much as I enjoyed writing it😘

Update: I re wrote this a little, just made some small changes here and there.

6k words(I thought there were more)

Masterlist part 2

Gojo Satoru had all kind of connections. He basically knew everyone in the campus at this point, the campus you shared and many others. And who could blame him? People liked him. It wouldn't be surprising if someone goes at him for anything. That's how he wakes up in someone else business most of the time, it all starts with a small favor, and then he finds out its not that small as he thought it would be. And yet he still does it again and again. He's an idiot, isn't he?

Who could blame him. No one was in their right minds anymore these days. But an idiot will always remain an idiot. And so, he woke up helping someone again. A friend you happen to have in common came to him, asking if he knows any place available to stay at. And the idiot went around asking about it, only to find up things about you. Like what kind of person you are, how people viewed you, how you got in the situation of moving out. You were a quiet person, or that's what some people said. Other said how it was so fun to have you around. You were non problematic, or hat's how he liked to see it. You were a peaceful person who just happened to be in an unfortunate situation.

He would usually say no, but he met you in person. You looked tired, and small compared to him, you looked like you bearly got any sleep these days. He lives in a big house, doesn't he? It's not like he needs new people in there, the quietness was enough for him. He also clearly don't need any money from you especially. If you can't afford sleep, would you be able to afford a place to stay in?

And somehow you woke up moving into his house. After a lot of talking about it with him, just making sure you heard what you heard right you finally made a decision. Sure, he doesn't seems bad, so why not accepting.

Everything was so peaceful at first. He said he won't be there most of the times. Him and the unexpected housemate you found there were out almost all day. And when they were back everyone seems to be so careful around each other. No one makes fast moves and it seems that you adapted to that life there rather quick. Everything was like a dream, or that what it seemed like. Until you heard a rather nasty rumor about your so called housemates. Animals in heat, that's how you can call them without saying a bad word.

You can't see it. You just can't see it. Your roommates were two regular guys. Sure, one was ridiculously rich, but he was fine. Maybe a little childish. And the other guy was just so down on earth. That guy was softer than your damn pillow. The way he talks was definitely telling you that the rumors are fake. Defamation. This got to be defamation. I mean, no matter how much you think about it you can't see these guys as some fuckers who are.. Well.. Doing what the name says. Fucks.

But you couldn't help but listen to those false allegations. The nights they weren't home they were supposed to be partying somewhere until they leave with a girl. You never saw anyone bringing anything home. So where were they? Do they like spending times in hotels instead of their own house? And that's when you find out they almost never brings girls home because they go to ladies houses.

Everything you heard was true. It's an unwritten rule that they don't like to see strangers on their beds. So that means they spend the night there? No, they always come back no matter what. Fooling in someone else bed was alright, but staying the night was a no no. All those rumors made you think. What was so special about them? And so, you started to observe them whenever you could. It was like an small experiment in your head, it meant literally nothing more. It made you think about the situation. Were they really not as you see it?

Without even realizing you got out the room at the same time they were at home. When they were in the kitchen, you happen to be there, nothing happened that just a few words exchanged , small talk. However, it was bothering them.

They really don't understand why you're looking like that at them. No, they're actually full aware of the look in your eyes. It's was something they saw so many times, yet it was more. It wasn't just horniness, it wasn't that lust they're so familiar with. It was curiosity. You don't even have to say a word because it was clearly written on your face. Yet they don't want to admit that it was just something innocent. Both of them agreed mentally that you want them. It wasn't sure which one but it was clearly you wanted something from one of them. They were the horny ones. Your eyes studying them so openly, no thoughts behind it, no shame. They were indeed animals in heat, because they just couldn't keep it to themselves. And just like always, they were willing to give you whatever you want. That if you finally say something, do a move yourself. Not just looking and that's it.

"Y/N." you moved your eyes on who ever was calling your name, none other than your landlord. "Did something happened?" to him it seemed like you had something to say but you were to shy to say it. He was more than happy to give you a little push, help you to finally say something.

"Mno..?" he gulped, you looked right into his eyes. The looks you kept giving earlier wasn't helping either. He only heard stuff about how you were shy and you didn't go much out. Your friends don't even remember the last time you went on a date, that if you ever went on a date. "Ohh." you're reaction made both of them move their eyes straight on you. You finally was going to say it? "I apologize." you laughed. "I heard something and I wanted to see it myself." you had a sweet smile on you face, it really didn't look like you were undressing them in your mind. You were curious. And if you have the answers right in front of you, wouldn't you want to know what is actually happening?

"Rumors?" the dark haired guy sat down at the table you were sitting with a cup of coffee in his hand.

"Mhhmm." you nodded.

"Are you that interested in what other people say?" you shook your head.

"Not at all." you got up from your chair. "Sorry for making you concerned." and so, you went to your room. You can't figure out what's in their head, and they can't figure what's in yours. There were a lot of rumors about them, most of them being true, but you could never know. You haven't heard anything about your name yet, so maybe people don't even know you live there to begin with. Which is good. The last thing you want is someone disturbing your peace.

What you should have put in calculation was the two demons outside your door. Gojo only let you stay because he was interested in you, the other guy just started to feel a little curious. When they tried to show that they know you're watching, you did nothing more than continue to watch them further. You would look them right in the eyes like you did nothing shameless. And the answer you gave them was so vague that they're now asking for more. It's not like they disliked you there next to them, just looking at them and doing nothing more. It's that it made their imagination go wild.

You bearly went out if it wasn't for school. And up until not so long ago you wouldn't even get out the room when they were home. It was so quiet in there that they forgot about you. That until you got in that kitchen, you're steps were so carefully placed on the floor, the way you would walk around the table and sit at a spot they would have never guessed it was yours in the first place. It became like a routine to see you there in the morning, since that was the time of the day where they would be at home. Oh, but now you stopped. When they're awake you're sleeping safe and sound. Maybe they should have let you do your thing. Of course they would have answered whatever question you might had, but what they don't know is the thoughts you were thinking of. The way you would just smile like you didn't thought about what the hell they were doing when they were out.

You were just curious. And you're happy they finally said something, so that way you could stop looking for whatever you were looking. They're not happy tho. It's been a week since they didn't seen you even breathing around them. Everyone was tired. That's why they started coming home earlier. Which turned into an unfortunate event.

Stressed, everyone was stressed. And you became even stressed when you woke up in the middle of the night hearing noises. Was someone in pain? Did someone needed help? Then you woke up and realizing what is actually happening. The sounds you heard weren't from pain, they were moans, and bed moving. They weren't your moans, they didn't sounded like male moans. It was definitely a woman. You sighed as you went back to sleep, ready to complain about it tomorrow to your housemates.

You were so eager to complain about what happened. The moment you got in the kitchen you sat down next to the dark haired guy. "Suguru, have you heard that last night?" you sighed, yet you were thrilled to continue complaining. "Honestly, can't the neighbors chill?" you wanted to hear him agreeing with you, yet he didn't.

"It wasn't the neighbors." huh? Now you were confused.

"What do you mean?" you both looked at the person who just entered the kitchen. You looked at the guy next to you with big eyes when you realized what actually happened, you stood there bamboozled. He only nodded, like he could read you mind. He knew exactly what you were thinking of. "No way.." a hand was placed over your mouth to show how shocked you were. "I'm sorry! I didn't know!" you exclaimed as you ran from there to your room. So those rumors were true? But you could have never guessed. I mean, weren't they in some kind of mafia or something? Why else would they be out all the times if they weren't working? But didn't people said they don't get girls home? Then was that his girlfriend? What about all those shameful things you thought of? You have to apologize to his girl.

The next morning you got out your room and shyly went into the kitchen. Moving carefully and biting your lower lip, you sat down next to your landlord at the big table that was placed in the kitchen. You looked at him, then at your hands while you kept playing with your fingers. The other guy looked amused. He could only guess why you're acting like that, but he probably knows exactly what you wanted to say. The white haired guy keep moving his eyes from his phone to you. Was this a deja vu? Or perhaps not. This feels like it happened before yet so different at the same time. You looked only at him, you sat next to him, and the other guy seems to find it funny. Clearly, something happened that he's not aware of. He's a little angry now. How can he be left out? Especially when you don't even do much besides coming into the kitchen for a few minutes then run away from there. "Something happened?" this was definitely a deja vu. The same thing, same words, yet it felt so different.

"I'm sorry.." so something did happened? What could be so bad that you got to act like this? You weren't in this situation when you got caught for staring at them shamefully.

"Huh?"

"I know it wasn't my business.. I should have probably shut up.. But please listen to me first." the guy that was sitting not so far from you was laughing his ass off. This was pure gold, comedy in its purest form. He couldn't stop you even if he wanted to. After all, you had to find things out yourself, and he didn't plan to give you any information. "I really didn't know. I wouldn't had said anything if I knew she was your girlfriend." now that was a twist that made even the hyena stop laughing. Now everyone was interested in what happened.

"What do you mean by my girlfriend?" your landlord was mad that someone is out there pretending to be his girlfriend. He might change girlfriends frequently, but at the moment he was single. So who would dare to present themselves as his girl?

"I heard that you don't get girls home unless it's someone important." never in their life have they bought someone home since you moved in there.

"I didn't bring anyone in here?" everyone was confused. No one didn't know what to say.

"The other day you came back with someone, right? I just wanted to apologize because I didn't know it was you. I thought it was the neighbors." the dark haired guy started to laugh again, this time not even trying to hide it. You got up from you seat and went to the door as fast as you could. "Anyway, I'm sorry. I just want it to say it in case of anything." and so, you disappeared from their eyes once again. Whatever you heard about them it was clearly bullshit in their eyes. You need to stop listening to whatever people had to say, they could answer to whatever question you had. Yet you never ask for anything.

A game of cats and mouse started. It was clearly who were the evil minds that came with the plan and who was the clueless victim. One day when you were at school, they happen to be there to switch everything in the house. Whatever you thought you knew was, now was in a complete another place. It was pitiful to watch them work so eagerly on this. It was hard to watch them being idiots, yet not even a second they stopped to think about it. All they had to do now was for you to come back.

It took you two days to finally see that something is wrong. In these two days they almost died of impatience because of how slow you were. Yet look at you, refusing to give up. You searched everywhere in the kitchen cabinets for whatever you were looking for, only to see with the corner of your eye that it was placed somewhere were you clearly couldn't reach at. You took a chair and tried to get it yourself. You don't need help from those fuckers after all. Why would you need it when they made your life so complicated.

"Need help?" the knight in shining armor was too late unfortunately, yet that didn't stopped Gojo from doing something.

"Not at all." he came next to you, took whatever was in your hands and put it back up, just to take it and handle it to you.

"Here you go." you sighed. But your misfortune continue to grow when the other idiot came in.

"You're stuck there? Is it too high for you?" the dark haired guy tone was like it was making fun of you. He picked you up and put you down. "There there, no need to thank me." all you did was to sigh.

"I don't need this anymore. Can you put it back?" you handed whatever you had in your hands back to them.

"You got the wrong thing? This happens if you try to reach high places alone." the moment they turned their heads away from you was the way you disappeared from there. Oh, but it was hell the next few days. Nothing was in their right places and it turned you crazy. You gave up. If that's what they wanted to hear then they win. Just like always, you finally showed up in that kitchen. You sat at another chair, choosing a different one from your usual one. Head and hands on the table as you waited for them to appear there. You were about to call it defeat when you fell asleep. It was morning after all, at this time you would usually sleep. Heck, even the bed under you was sleeping. If you were pulling out the white flag, now they were the ones doing it. Seeing you there once again made them realize their mistake.

They apologized ,not to you physically but mentally. You did nothing more than just being curious. Who wouldn't be? Some rich guy let you stay in his house when you needed a place to stay. He didn't ask for anything, the rent was even lowered to half the price it was to the previous place you lived at. And even after all those rumors you heard, you didn't had to see any of their dates inside the house. It was nice living there, they tried to make an effort somehow to not disturb you. And so you did to them. But maybe they didn't thought about it in the end. Sure, it was childish, but wouldn't you do the same if you were in their shoes? Just like you, they have questions. They also want answers. Their methods might be a little out of pocket, but try to think the way they do. They're too proud, you'll never see them asking for anything. They'll make you ask for it and then act nonchalant about it. Can't you see they're just some big fucks? They're fuckers and they're proud. They're literally dickheads.

The strategy changed. They'll get you out that room in other ways. That's when you started to wake up with all kind of food and sweets. They'll get home and the first thing to do is to go to your room to announce what they got. It made you instantly get out the bed and follow them. They played dirty all the time. They did it in such a way that when you hear the front door you instantly get out the bed and sprint to who ever came back. Big smile on your face and knowing absolutely nothing about whatever scheme they might plan next.

"I didn't got anything today." Suguru's words made you lose your smile instantly. "Satoru might come with something tho." and that made your smile to come back.

"Can I stay with you until he comes back?" his smile seems so innocent. It made him look innocent. That old fox isn't playing according to the books. No, in fact he'll get off the main path just to get to what he wants faster. He knew exactly that your so called landlord wouldn't come back home tonight. Yet he's not going to say shit.

"Of course." and so, you ended up with him on the big couch that was in the living room, watching some movie that was playing on some random channel on tv. It would be such a big lie if he says whatever he was after was just friendship. Is he trying hard? Maybe. But he wants to look like you're the one worked up about it. He wants to look like he just happened to be there and that's it. And oh man he got what he want. By the end of that movie you two ended up in your room. His hands moved so fast to get your clothes off the moment that door was closed. The big windows gave so much light that he could see very clearly where your bed was at.

"Suguru.." you whined his name so sweet and softly. It took all the control he haves to not jump on you in that exact moment, not like he wasn't all over you. If he knew that he could have got to this point sooner from a movie and some takeaways he would have got through this a long time ago. You sat at the edge of the bed, looking at him taking his clothes off and then he jumped back on you.

"Have you done this before?" he was placed in between your legs ,one of his hands placed on your thigh as the other was on the bed right next to you keeping him from not putting all his weight on you. You nodded your head slowly.

"But it's been a while so be gentle with me." animal in heat describes him the best. It looked like a big bad wolf was on top of its prey. If you still can walk tomorrow then that means he did a bad job. But your sweet words made him realize that's too soon. How can he get in your bed again if he scares you now?

"Alright." the hand he had on your thigh moved in between your legs. You were so wet after that little make out session you had on the couch. It should be a crime to leave you alone when you clearly need his help. He's only playing the bigger person so he won't fuck everything right now, so let him believe in his delusions.

Two of his fingers were inside you, moving them in and out of you for a few moments just to see how far he can go. And then he started to curl them, making you instantly squirm. Did the other guy you fucked not do a good job? Maybe that's why you had almost non existent experience in this. Maybe you were left disappointed. Well, aren't you lucky? He likes to hear only good reviews about himself. Oh, but he hopes you heard about his services. If you're so interested in what other people says then you should definitely listen to the people that ended in the same bed as him. "I know you like it, but stop moving so much." he stopped his hand movement for a moment to let you breathe. He's lying. He likes the way you're squirming and trembling at everything he does.

"You're so mean." you whined. If that was mean then he doesn't know how to call whatever he's usually doing. He likes it rough. He likes to see tears in the eyes of who ever he's fucking. He likes to relieve his stress in questionable ways.

"Am I?" he had this diabolical smirk on his face. Evil was too little to say. He looked like he let his demons out of leash. His face got closer to yours, whispering sweet nothings in your ear as he started to move his hand again. He'd go as deep as he can, discovering all kind of places, touching you here and there just to see you melt. "Come on, look at me, don't close your eyes." he'll rub your clit for time to time, just to remind you about it. It was mostly to see your expressions, and to remind you how mean he can be. If you said he is then he is, no? This was him just being the fucker he is. Toying with you just to show you how he can make you feel. And to remind you that if he gives, then he also can take away all these new overwhelming feelings. Beg for him. That's what he wants to hear from you after all. Cries and begs.

And you were falling all for it. The way you would cry his name was like good news to his ears, a melody that's he's so happy to hear. His fingers are always making sure to touch all the good places. But at some point it was too much, you felt like you were going over the edge, your vision completely disappearing when you came all over his hand. And he still kept toying with you. "Please-" you gasped. "No more.." you were so dumb for him that he couldn't help but want to over stimulate you, play with you until you're begging for more.

"You can take it, can't you?" it was an obvious no from you. It was the first time you felt this overwhelming, you clearly needed a break to calm down.

"Kiss me." you wanted to feel more than just his evil scheme. A kiss would go so good after that torture. But he stopped the moment you said those words. He just wanted to show you whos in charge of this, because he clearly didn't liked how comfortable you got with him. You didn't seemed to look mad at him for not fulfill your request, no, in fact you only sighed relived. Finally you were free from his cursed hands. He pressed your legs together and put them on his shoulder. You weren't ready for the big thing. You bearly can take his thick fingers, just looking at his cock made you almost pass out. "I don't think I'm ready for that.." you gulped, you only hoped to hear something about how you could do it if you wanted to or any words of encouragement.

"I know you can't." he said as his hand traveled to your pussy, collecting some of your juices to rub it on his cock along with his precum. "The moment I'll get inside that pussy of yours I'll make sure you won't be able to walk for days." he said as he slips his cock in between your thighs. He expected to get more than this in return, because in his head he deserves more than he gives, at least in that situation. But he's not that horny yet to forget about his morals. So this is enough for the moment, because he knows that in the future you'll be able to give him so much more than now.

He hated those eyes of yours. The way you would look so innocent, curious. Ughh. It just made him want to ruin you. Just look at the way you look at him right now. Big eyes, just as curious as always, yet he can see it more playful. It made him think that you're not taking him seriously. "Does it feel good?" he kept moving his hips back and forth, rubbing his cock on your skin. It felt so soft and warm. Your whole body was warm no matter where he puts his hands on you. He couldn't give you an answer, not because he couldn't, it was more because he didn't want to. Why don't you figure it out yourself? All he can do was to grunt, hopping you'll get the message.

His grip on your thighs was so tight that it might leave a bruise. He felt like your going to run away the moment you get a chance to. So all he can do was to grab you as close as he can. Keeping your legs in place as he moves his hips.

What was first a slow pace now turned into fast and desperate thrusts. He couldn't keep his head straight, he couldn't think anymore the moment he felt like hes getting closer and closer to that sweet release he kept chasing after. He wanted to hear something from you, it was too quiet. Yet he can't ask for it, because his ego is just not letting him.

He'll eat you up. The moment he would get inside that pussy of yours he'll make sure the whole neighborhood would hear his name. "I'd fuck that mouth of yours right now if I could." he let his thoughts out. He couldn't think of a single peaceful or good word to say to you. And you didn't said anything about it and took whatever he had to say. You watched him the whole time. You can clearly see that something is wrong with him. His face, his actions are showing so. "Fuuuck." he was so so so close. He had so many things to say yet he didn't said shit because it just didn't felt like it was the right time. You weren't in the same situation as him, you weren't going through the same rollercoaster of emotions. He really wanted to flip you over, fuck you from behind as he'd just call you a slut, or any names to degradate you. You could take it, can't you? You could take this load right here right now and thanks him for it at the end, won't you? Lost in his thoughts, he finally came all over your belly. Still moving his hips just to get everything all out.

What a night, huh. He felt into the bed right next to you, tired, and just wanting to get some sleep. Wasn't it surprising tho? He fucked differently for once and now he feels like he ran a marathon. And you had the audacity to look at him with those big eyes again. Looking so sweetly and ready to take him for real this time. "You'll sleep here tonight?"

"Who knows." he would do like always, he knew the answer yet he couldn't say that he was ready to leave in this instance your room to go back to his. He waited for you to fall asleep before he finally retreated to his bedroom.

He could only imagine how you'll react tomorrow when you can't see him. He thought you'll stay in your room just like always. But no, the next day you were in that kitchen, sitting next to him so shyly. It was like you were back to the beginning. You didn't want anything more from him than just ask if everything is alright between you too. Just to make sure everything stays the way it was before. But you can't really say anything since your landlord is also there. And this makes you feel so guilty.

"Ehh. You really done it, didn't you." the white haired guy said something. That scared you, your heart almost left your body. Does he knows? Were you in trouble? "Don't worry, Y/N. Whatever happened he probably doesn't even remembers about it." the dark haired guy only smiled like he didn't know why you were acting like that. Since his friend was so clueless maybe he could tease you about it a little.

"Hmm? What have I done?" you could see your soul leaving your body. All you wanted to do is to make sure that you're relationship stays the same. But this was too much. You were on the verge of crying.

"L- let's talk about it later!" you ran from there like always. How long would it last until you'll say something? He won't say a word until you do the first step. Why? Because he liked to see you cry. He didn't thought that he would bully you, but you clearly deserve it for playing with his head.

Imagine his surprise to see you the next day in the kitchen again. If he would be the first to come out his room, now he would make sure to come as late as possible. You could go to his room and say whatever you had to say, yet you didn't. You would go in that damn kitchen all the time to interact with them. Was that small talk enough for you? Didn't you wanted more? Because if you would come to his room he promise to reward you for your courage and give you a little bit of himself. You could even choose what you wanted from him. He would be glad to hear what you had to say. That if you stop going into that kitchen and just be straight forward. In his eyes you were a coward. Yet he loved toying you the way he wants.

You sat next to him again. This time more determined than before. You took out your phone and typed a simple question in your notepad.

'Can I ask you something?' you showed him your phone screen.

He acted like he didn't see it.

'I really want to ask you something.'

Still he acted like he didn't see anything.

This was pure madness. This was getting on your nerves. You stepped on his foot to get his attention. He gasped as he looked in shock at you. The nerves. The audacity. You point to your phone again yet he keeps acting like he doesn't see anything. He even turned his face away.

"Just talk already." Gojo only rolled his eyes. "What happened anyway?"

Geto looked at you. He didn't planned on saying anything unless you said it. He just wanted to fuck with your head after all. Nothing more besides getting on your nevers. You wanted to say it so bad. The words wouldn't come out your mouth when so many eyes were on you. It didn't matter if it were only them. You can't say it. So you did the only thing you had left. Retreat. At least for the moment. You got out of there and stormed in your room. Next time it's either a win or nothing at all. You swear to get an end to this and then you can live peacefully and go on with your life.

The next day you waited in the hallway for that stubborn man to come out his room. It was a long wait, yet you stayed by his door until he finally came out. "Are we good. Yes or no?" you went straight to the point. All these days of playing around made you sick of this.

"Why don't you come in so we could talk about it?" he wanted you in his room, he will get you there.

"I just want to know that nothing changed."

"What do you mean by that?" this damn wolf.

"Like. We're the same as before, right? I just want to make sure nothing changed between us. " he had that dumb smile on his face and he kept acting like he doesn't know shit.

"Come in and lets talk." this was making you so mad. He didn't wanted to talk when you tried before but now hes willing to talk about it? He grabbed your hand and dragged you in his room, pushing you against the door as soon as he closed it. Hands in your shirt going up as his lips touched yours. Here was your reward for taking such a big step.

"You said talk." you gasped for air.

"This is also a form of talking." his cold hands made you squirm. The way he's moving his hands up and down against your skin. He wanted to go all the way up to your breasts until you heard a someone knocking on the door.

"It's me. Just wanted to make sure you two are alright." this was clearly a way to get out of there before this situation gets worse.

"Ah yes. We're fine." a hand grabbed your arm, stopping you from going further away. That damn fox just can't let you go yet.

"Can I know what happened?" you tried to not panic, but you just couldn't. Your mind was still on whatever happened earlier.

"We watched a movie and we argued about it." it was far from the truth. But you'll just go with what Geto said. You can't think of a better excuse.

"Huh?" your landlord raised and eyebrow.

"It was a good movie. Right, Y/N?" the way this man haves to drag you through mud and hell before you could have a break.

You gulped. "Indeed." you can't even find your words.

"So we can go like how it was before then." this evil man said it like you weren't the one that kept trying to make sure everything is alright.

"I should put a parental lock on that tv." your landlord only sighed and turned around going back to the kitchen. You ran from there in your room. Only wanting a break from this madness.

#gojo satoru #gojo satoru smut #gojo smut #gojo x reader #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #geto x reader #geto smut #geto suguru #geto suguru smut

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godlike-enigma · 3 months ago

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°•*⁀➷ INTRODUCING MYSELF ! ˘͈ᵕ˘͈

bani ☆ she/her ☆ entp 5w4 ☆ minor (𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗶𝗰𝘁𝗹𝘆 18+ 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝗯𝗹𝗼𝗴𝘀 𝗯𝗹𝗼𝗰𝗸 𝗺𝗲) // side blog: @ilubeau

HI GUYS !! i post daydreaming-related stuff here but it's also kind of a mix of everything, i'll also post anime related stuff, i'll never really stick to just one thing but what i CAN tell you i'll be sticking to is my centrecosm mostly (my main paracosm, i'm staying loyal to the one i've been building for the past 4 years) it's also a blanket paracosm so there's loads of subcosms inside it but at the end of the day it's linear and takes place chronologically.

i have a few paracosms here and there so that's why i call myself a paracosmist but really and all they'll never compare to my main one. ಠ_ಠ

❤︎ this is a safe place for all madders (ง'̀-'́)ง, i really wanna make friends that are passionate with opening up about their little daydreaming worlds, i'll listen to you yap about it all day long.

PLEASE DO SEND QUESTIONS ABOUT MY PARACOSM(S) OR ABOUT YOURS !! i'll always reply ^-^

MY CENTRECOSM ✧

i have 60 paras (characters). yes. you heard that right. SIXTY. i have a whole pinterest board on it and i update it regularly -

https://pin.it/4Yvd42Asm

also yeah i'm a microcelebrity on pinterest idk if you've seen me around but yeah wtvr 😭😭 ALRIGHT LEMME GIVE YOU GUYS A LIL SYNOPSIS ! (i've never done one it's kinda scary)

my paracosm consists of 50 Gods, 4 archdemons, 4 archangels and God themself (God doesn't have a gender) and 5 monotheistic Gods, my paracosm has its own lore of different mythologies. greek, norse, and egyptian mythology. fiction has no limits, so i can bend it to fit my desires, i LOOOOOVE mythologies of all kinds, so i made my own lore using the names you see on the pinterest board. all of the Gods have the same power and no ones more powerful than each other except for God and Satan. the Gods are the most beautiful, ethereal, alluring individuals in heaven. Satan made it so that whenever someone who is not a God sees a God's appearance, they physically feel like they can't say anything. this is to prevent any romantic relationships. so whenever, for example, a human who is granted permission sees them, obviously, their initial reaction would be shock and the need to compliment them. right when they're about to do that, they start to feel choked up like they can't get the words out. it'll go on like that until they give up. the gods have noticed that a lot of the time when they show their selves to other people and they start reacting like that.. they start thinking its because they're ugly or something. LMFAOO, they'll be like "damn i'm THAT ugly???" and its so ironic bc they're actually trying to tell them they're more than beautiful, but they CAN'T because of Satan. he has a lot of unreasonable rules, and the Gods just put up with it because they appointed him as the leader whilst God is gone, so they kind of did to themselves... to put it in a nutshell, the Gods have never been complimented. like. ever. so 😭 its only factual that they'd feel like they're the ugliest individual alive. Satan is currently acting as the overseer of the Gods whilst God is away, so he gets to do whatever he wants to. the Gods are the main characters, the archdemons and archangels are side characters, Satan is the antagonist, and God is... mysterious. they don't pop up. ever. so the Gods just assume they don't like them. i can go on and on about this, but i feel like i'm yapping too much ... this isn't even 0000.5% of the story. sorry, guys, this is a really bad summary, but trust me, you'll find out more about it if you follow through with my posts 🙏🏽

tags i'll use (＞﹏＜) :

#𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗺𝗮𝗱𝗱 -> posts that are not daydreaming-related

#𝗯𝗮𝗻𝗶'𝘀 𝘆𝗮𝗽 𝘀𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 -> original posts

#𝗺𝗮𝗱𝗱 𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘁 -> vents about madd

#𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗯𝘆𝗯𝗮𝗻𝗶 -> art i make about my paracosm or anime and stuff

#actually madd #madd #paracosm #daydreaming #immersive daydreaming #inner world #paraportal #girl blogger #maladaptive coping #writers on tumblr #madd things #maladapting daydreaming disorder #writing #story

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oatmealdaydreams · 1 year ago

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Ayo, Beta-Readers Discord??

Idk if there's already something like this, but I had an idea.

What if we had a Beta-Readers Discord to better help find available beta-readers for our fanfics and stuff?

Some things I had in mind:

a mod chat room for mods (moderators) & having mods to help keep the server safe for everyone

A ticket channel for any sort of help needed relating to if someone is harassing someone or the like

The tag things to indicate pronouns, if you're a writer or a beta-reader or both, if you're available or not to beta-read, which fandoms you're in, if you're a minor or a major (only so people uncomfy with adults can see who's an adult and who's not; same thing for people uncomfy with kids n stuff), etc.

Different channels for each fandom to seek out Beta-Readers or look for writers who need some help

Channels just to gush about your fics or WIPs because a lot of us are nd and I want to have a space where people can infodump (sorted by fandom or misc. for crossover fics)

I'd encourage writers and beta-readers to dm each other to sort out their agreement details (like when they need it done by, if it's for an event, what they need help with, etc.)

Some channels to share/promote your fics for anyone interested (sorted by fandom and/or tags depending on the trigger/content warnings)

An ideas/prompts channel for each fandom and such to help people with ideas or plot

A beta-readers chat room so beta-readers who can't do it or have to abandon a project for whatever reason can find people to help instead (remember to keep the writers in the loop if ya need to tap out or if beta-readers need to change)

A general chat room so everyone can chill with each other :D

An introductions channel to help everyone meet each other (includes name/pseudo, pronouns, little intro things)

Music/song suggestions channel to help fellow writers with writing to music and stuff

A lil help channel for people who just have a small question and not exactly need a beta-reader, so they can get questions answered by fellow writers and beta-readers

A channel for those who manage the writing events so y'all have help organizing events or just to talk about them with fellow event planners of

Maybe some "study buddy" voice channels/text channels for body doubling (basically like parallel play or companionable silence but for writing and/or beta-reading, in this case)

A suggestions channel for any sort of server suggestions like channels that may help or something

And anything else y'all think would be helpful!

I'd own the server cause I'd make it, but I wanted to make something to help my fellow writers & beta-readers. If I ever actually do this, I'll also make a side blog for the discord's updates and stuff.

Let me know if there's already a server like this, or if y'all have anything else to add to this list!

Just a lil idea because of all the events coming up :D

#fandom #discord #beta readers #writing event planners #event planners #writers #fanfic writers #fanfic discord #discord server #server idea

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writemywaytoyourheart · 2 years ago

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pls help.

hey guys,

sorry I haven't been updating, there's been a lot going on. I've honestly never ever ever wanted to do this but I seriously need help rn.

I literally do not care about food or gas or literally anything but my dog right now. She's got some problems with her teeth and I can't afford to get them fixed. It could be causing breathing issues and it is definitely just hurting her rn. I've been declined for financial help for who knows what reason and idk what to do. I have nothing.

I've decided to start a gofundme and see if I can get even a little bit of help from that. I've been hesitating putting it here but again I'm desperate. If you guys know of any other way I can also get help pls pls pls let me know.

I hate asking anything of you guys I feel sick about it and I'm trying so hard not to cry rn. Literally anything helps. I'm so so so sorry I'm even having to post this. I know everyone is struggling rn which makes me feel a million times worse even thinking about asking.

Maybe I can do some personalized drabbles or something for you guys, anything you want. I'll write whatever idc, whatever you want. I just cannot watch my best friend be in silent pain anymore.

If you can help at all by donating or sharing or anything I will literally be in your debt for like ever.

Daisy's gofundme

ILY <3

-chip

idk what to tag to get this seen im sorry

#cute animals #cute dog #puppies #gofundme #idek what to tag #fm im so stressed #idk what im doing

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lilith-little-world · 2 years ago

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Character ai is a mess. I went back to it and lost myself in it again, but I'm back now but idk for how long. So I'm gonna like speedrun all of my writing and editing for this and the 2nd chapter. Cause holy shit, I'm gonna be hella busy in a few months. Also found out I have a small and harmless heart condition...yeah so this month been crazy.

Also made a little drawing since I was gone for a while. Hopefully I’ll be back with weekly updates now I’m off of character ai and started to take meds for my heart.

I Saw You Once In a Dream, Maybe Pt 9

Is it too late to kick him out? He stares up at you and smirks. You can feel your face get ready as the embarrassment hits. You can't be seriously asking for him to tag along.

You might as well beg for him to come.

“Can you please, come with me? I would appreciate it, if you can. I'll even buy something for you.”

It took everything in you to stare back at him. The urge to smack him increased when his smirk widened.

How the fuck did you two got married in the future?

“Oh, of course, I will come along. Especially when you asked so nicely.” He stands up and heads to the front door, giving you one last glance.

You sigh and try to calm down. Ever since running into him, your day has been…well you can't even describe it. Was it bad? Good? Meh?

You lock the door and catch up to Monkey King, who was waiting for you on the sidewalk. He gives you a soft smile.

“So which way are we going?”

“There's a small market nearby. It's just a short walk, 5 minutes tops.”

You walk off and try to block out any thoughts of how you prefer that smile on his face.

Monkey King nods and follows you.

“So what are you planning for dinner? I'm not much of a cook but I can help!” He stares at you with that same soft expression.

What the hell happened?! Why is he acting all calm and sweet all of a sudden?

You continue to ignore your thoughts and how your heart was fluttering.

“I don't know, I guess we'll find out when I buy the groceries. I'm not much of a cook either. I just fall asleep and skip dinner for most nights.”

“I don't think that's healthy for a human.” He mutters. You can see he wanted to say something more.

“Maybe, but I never had a reason to make dinner. A snack or takeout was enough.”

“So why not tonight?”

“Well…” You felt nervous and embarrassed. “It's been a while since I had someone over at my house so I just thought…that maybe I should do something different- something special.” You didn't need to see your face to know you were blushing. You wanted to scold yourself for getting all flustered for no reason yet all your thoughts stopped when you glanced at Monkey King.

He stares at you with wide eyes.

“You're cooking dinner because of me?” His eyes seem to shine like stars. Beaming with fondness and affection. “Looks like someone is falling for me.”

“What?! I just met you!” You nudge his shoulder. You wanted to get mad or at least annoyed but you just laughed. Monkey King laughs with you as he bumps his shoulder with yours. “Sneakily” holding your hand. Intertwining his fingers with yours, his grasp firm.

You smiled at him and held his hand back. Leaning on his shoulder as you both walk to the grocery store.

Even though you two spent an hour there. You enjoyed his company. Monkey King, helping by grabbing items or just joking around and having fun. What had always been a chore for you, felt fun when he joined along.

Okay, maybe you're starting to understand why you married this idiot.

Also, you managed to buy a little more than usual since he could carry a lot of things. That was a huge plus for you, since you refuse to use your car for anything. Does that thing even work? Oh, wait, pretty sure you lost the key to it and are too lazy to get a new one.

“Thank you again for helping to carry the bags back. You can place it on the counter.”

“You bought a lot of things, how empty is your fridge?”

“Shhhh, we don't talk about that. I bet you don't even have a fridge, so don't judge.”

“There's literally nothing in here.” He said placing a few items in the fridge.

You blow a raspberry at him and put the refrigerated items in the fridge.

“I told you I usually eat a snack or takeout. I hardly cook.”

“Is it because you don't know how to cook? How worried should I be, when you serve me my plate?”

You roll your eyes.

“If you're so worried, then I won't serve you anything.”

“Hey now, I said, I would be worried but that won't stop me from eating it. Edible or not, you're serving me food you made! No way I'm passing that opportunity. Maybe I can pretend, my darling spouse made me the best dinner after a long day of work.”

“Ha-ha, very funny. Are we really going to roleplay being an old married couple or what? We barely met, Monkey King.”

“Wukong, you can call me Wukong.”

You raise a brow at him.

“Alright, Wukong. So we are on a first-name basis now huh?”

“I mean-” He glances away, but you can see his cheeks turning red. “I really want to have a relationship with you and it'll be weird having you calling me by my title.”

It was weird to see him so…embarrassed and flustered. Throughout this whole day, he has been teasing you. Maybe there were a few moments when you saw him more softly. You just laughed and ruffled his fur in his head.

“I guess you're right about that, so Wukong it is then. Now put on a show we can watch while I cook. Nothing fancy or crazy, just some regular easy and fast food.”

Wukong chuckles as he heads to the living room.

“Alright, fine, but no complaints about what I pick.”

You put away the groceries and left the ingredients out. Once in a while, glancing at the tv to see what Wukong was searching for. You head to the trash can to throw something away when you spot the stuffed toy.

A part of you felt bad for throwing it away but another part of you felt embarrassed that you even bought the toy. What would Wukong think? Would he tease you about it or be hurt that you threw it away? That's if he found out. I wonder what will be the consequences for this?

#lmk reader #lmk y/n #lmk x reader #lmk x y/n #lmk sun wukong #lmk monkey king #sun wukong #monkey king #lmk wukong #sun wukong x reader #lmk sun wukong x reader #lmk monkey king x reader #monkey king x reader #lmk #interactive story

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brilla-brilla-estrellita · 8 months ago

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An ask game for writers to procrastinate working on you WIP(s)

Whoaaaa thank you for the tags @shrekgogurt, @bookish-bogwitch, @thewholelemon, @cutestkilla, @monbons, @drowninginships, and @blackberrysummerblog! I'm pretty sure that's everyone! I love being tagged in shit.

1. 🦈Tell us the name of your/ one of your WIP(s): So you just like... have names for them? Before you post them?

I will say that for once, a name did come to me, so one of them is tentatively titled Fettuccine and Foreplay, but I might change it because Foreplay is misleading. I'm sorry to say that it is not smutty, and the events are questionably even foreplay. But the alliteration. And Fettuccine and Flirting just doesn't have the same ring to it.

2. 🍄Describe your WIP/one of your WIP(s) in the format of “___ + ___ =___” God, why am I so bad at this?

Nevermore Academy + Penny = offensive assumptions, defensive students, and a magical breakthrough waiting to happen

3. 🌍What tags or warnings will one of your WIP(s) need if you intend to share it? uhhhhhh. I don't usually think about tags until I'm ready to post, so I am not prepared for this question... I can't really think of anything. Which makes me feel like my stories are hella boring.

Update after finishing and rediscovering an old wip: fluff! yay fluff.

4. 🧭An alternative title to one of your WIP(s)? Alternative titles??? So not only do you have titles, you also have extras laying about????

I guess I already talked about it in #1, but Fettuccine and Flirting. I do not like it.

5. ⚠️Which WIP you're most likely to finish or update next? Probably the Fettuccine one. It's a one-shot and a good portion done (almost ready for a beta, I think?). I like to write the whole story before I start posting, so the Wednesday x CO crossover is going to take a goooooood while. Idk how many chapters it is yet, I just know it's more than 3.

6. 💾What is your document of your WIP/ a WIP called? (not the stories actual title but what you’ve saved it as) I think my most interesting one is called Sundays With Gran. It's more of a drabble that I might work into a story at some point than it is an actual WIP though. But my actual WIPs have uninteresting names.

7. 🖍Post Any sentence(s) from your WIP.

It’s especially hard to believe in this reality when there’s a glow, a sparkle, a buzz around even the most mundane of sights when Simon is involved.

That's not even from a WIP I've already mentioned. I rediscovered this one while looking at document titles for this post!

8. ♻️A scrapped idea for your current WIP. I have one fic, the one from #7, where I originally wanted musings from each of the main 4, which each describing what's happening through focusing on a different sense or set of senses. Like Simon would be taste or touch, Penny would be sound, Baz would be sight, and Shep would be touch or smell. But that felt too restrictive. Senses are still a big part of it, of course, and there may still be strong affinities for one sense over another for each character, but they'll experience with the most appropriate sense for the moment.

9. 🤔What’s a story you’d love to write but haven’t even started yet? I really want to write more CO x Heartstopper (which we're calling Snowstopper because we're so clever) fics, but I'm making good progress on these other two and I'm afraid I'll lose the momentum if I start on the next Snowstopper idea. So I'll leave that for Kat to start in the meantime.

10. 🤡How many WIPS are you actively working on? At the beginning of this post, 2. As of #7, 3!

11. 🛠Is there a scene or anything in the WIP you are struggling with right now? So many! I think I need to rewrite much of what started the Wednesday x CO fic. The entire first two chapters don't feel quite in character for Penny.

And then most of this rediscovered fic, for now called Tiny Dots. (Hey look! A title!) Like I said before, it's character musings, and I'm not sure how to string them together in a way that feels cohesive.

12. ❤️Not a question, just a second Kudos to send.

I feel like I procrastinated on this procrastination game for so long that everyone else has already done it! I'm sorry if you've already been tagged 100 times, and especially if you've already done it and I missed it, buuuuut: @onepintobean @martsonmars @facewithoutheart umm... if you haven't been tagged, but want to be tagged, consider yourself tagged (or tell me and I'll update this post with your tag and no one has to know).

#ask game #simon snow #baz pitch #snowbaz #my writing #i feel like mine was so boring

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stars-of-kyber · 1 year ago

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20 Questions for Fic Writers!

@dreamstone28737 tagged me on this fun thing <3 thank you love!

1- How many works do you have on AO3?

32! Holy shit that's a lot.

2- What's your total AO3 word count?

351,009 words and counting. Again, I'm shocked at how much I've got done lol

3- What fandoms do you write for?

Right now at this moment, Bridgerton.

4- What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1st- You Belong With Me - 821

2nd -Falling For You - 451

3rd - You're The Only Thing I'll Ever Need - 423

4th - Lost, Drifting - 407

5th - Faithfully - 397

(The next one is Bad Habits which never stops to surprise me just how many Kudos it gets since it was one I thought I wouldn't get anything from.)

(God, I need to update my WIPs)

5- Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Honestly? Only when I feel I have something to add to the comment. Sometimes I see a comment with "Great Chapter/Episode" (which I really absolutely love, btw. Any comment makes me so damn happy I can't even explain) and I never know what to say to that and I don't want the person to feel I don't care about their comments when I just reply with "Thanks! I'm Glad you liked it <3" and I keep thinking about different things to read and I never can and when I see it, I have a bunch of unanswered comments which makes me overwhelmed to start.

So yeah, I usually only reply when I know what to say lol

6- What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Ending? (none? lol)

Posted, I'd say "The Way I Loved You", which I thought the ending might be kinda open? I don't usually do sad endings. I think "Faithuffy", "Of Noble Blood" and "You Belong With Me" have some rather angsty parts, along with "Lockdown" which touched a rather sensitive part of me. But all the endings were/will be (THEY WILL HAPPEN I PROMISE!) happy.

Unposted, it's probably "A Dead Man's Tale" which I'm writing right about now and I hope to start posting by Halloween on Tuesday (fingers crossed). The ending is... sentimental? Idk Kinda sad but happy too? I have no idea how to describe that. Either that or Raise a Little Hell, my Bonnie and Clyde, which will be my only NHEA story ever(if), when I get to write it.

(Feel free to tell me which of my fics you think it's the angstier. I'm curious!)

7- What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All of them? Lol

Walking The Wire because I finished it? sdakljfkdsgh I have no idea. Maybe Lockdown bc it's such a hard battle to end happily in the end.

(Which of my fics yall think is the happiest? Please tell me bc I have no idea.)

8- Do you get hate on fics?

Not on the Bridgerton ones, thankfully. Everyone that reads it is amazing which makes me really happy.

I had a pretty harsh time when I started on the Reylo Fandom in Star Wars. Not fun, I'll give you that.

9- Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I write hotter scenes, although I don't think I've ever finished an entire sex scene. That said, I have a one-shot called Stockings that is about 85% done which is porn/no plot that I might one day finish but I'm not that much of a fan of it, to be honest.

10- Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Unless you count crossover with Julia Quinn's own other series, no I don't.

11- Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I am aware of.

12- Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, which is kinda sad because I am a translator and I could very well do it myself lol but Idk if there are too many Portuguese-speaking readers that would be interested in it, and although I speak pretty good Spanish, I'm a tad out of practice and I don't master the written language nearly enough to attempt to translate something to Spanish.

13- Have you ever co-written a fic before?

A long time ago in a Galaxy far far away. It was... nice. And not at the same time. I hold myself to very VERY high standards, so I'm extremely self-critical and working with someone with different styles and ideas can be really harsh without trying to dictate the way you want the story to go. Plus the three times I did, we ended up giving up halfway through the story lol

14- What's your all-time favorite ship?

This is a stupid question and I hate it. I'm not good at picking. I am deeply, truly in love with Kathony, and have been for the past couple of years, but if I had to say at the top of my head, the oldest OTPs that have been in my heart, the ones here for the longest time and never really left are Percabeth from Percy Jackson and Jily from Harry Potter. Reylo and Rebelcaptain in Star Wars were also a very big part of me for a long time and I love them.

Asking all-time faves is mean.

15- What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Sought you, Sang you, Dreamed you, my Reylo Kidfic. I love it so much and I am so sorry my baby, but I can't focus on Reylo anymore. I have complete faith I will finish all my Kathony fics one day, I really do.

16- What are your writing strengths?

I honestly have no idea. As I mentioned, I am very self-conscious about what I do and I have incredibly high standards about myself. It's not uncommon to see me saying I hate my story and I won't post it and it's absolutely shit, I have no idea why people read it. So pointing out a quality is really hard.

I guess I'm good at dialogues? I always felt they sounded nice, idk.

17- What are your writing weaknesses?

I'm running a risk of repeating myself too much if I mention standards and self-consciousness, don't I?

I am terribly wordy. Nothing I do is short because I need 1k words for something I could have done in 200. I always feel people will get bored by it.

I also sometimes feel I have issues representing the emotions I'm trying to put through in my story. Many times you'll find me going to a neutral third party saying "Please tell me what's missing here." bc I feel it lacks.

Let's not mention the lack of self-discipline and the amount of time it takes me to write a story/update something. And overthinking things. Also coming up with more ideas than I have time to write.

18- Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I do that all the time? I am a native Portuguese speaker and English is my second language.

19- First fandom you wrote for?

Lol that's going far back, isn't it? I have been writing originals since I was 10 (I have a lil notebook with the first story I've ever written, it's adorable, but as usual, incomplete), but in 2011 I was obsessed with a soap opera called Rebelde (the Brazilian version, when I liked the Mexican RBD one, I didn't really know what fandom was yet. BUT I'M GOING TO THE CONCERT ON THE 9TH I'M SO EXCITED) and my first fic was a Roberta x Diego one, which is complete and (unfortunately, -or not- not all of it) available in Nyah Fanfiction, although I wish it wasn't bc it's truly shit. Like very very very shit. It was crazy, she died of lung cancer in the end. I swear to God, I had no clue what was going on with me at 14.

20- Favorite fic you've written?

Okay, look, this is not fun lol

I truly, honestly can't pick. Each one is special for me for a different reason. The Way I Loved You was my first Kathony. You Belong With me my first WIP and I have such a special place for it. I could go on and on for hours. I love them all, even the ones which are not my faves (Bad Habits, Reading Project).

But I will be absolutely thrilled if you guys tell me your fave of my fics. I would love a lot to know.

I'll tag @mimix007 @waterlilyrose, @harnitbee, @bellascarousel, @ladystanbury, @searching4paradiso, @alihightowers and her dragon people and @suspendingtime

#my writing #Tag games #writing tag game #my fics #bridgerton

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koinotame · 1 year ago

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\o/

hi! it's me, nana / koinotame!

if you're wondering why i went inactive and then deleted, my mental health kind of (really) tanked... and i ended up deleting my blog in a fit.

it's getting better bit by bit though! and i've been wanting to get back into writing (and talking abt my unhinged/yan ideas i can't really talk to anyone else abt), so. here i am! for now, at least

as for my previously posted writing, there's some good news and some bad news: the bad news is that everything i wrote directly into tumblr (99% of snippets, a lot of ask answers, most exact content warnings, etc) is gone. the slightly less bad news is that iirc there were very very few posts of mine that weren't reblogged by anyone at all, so they're probably still out there? feel free to send them my way if you find any and i'll rb them. @/midnight-remembrance also has reblogged a couple of them! there's a couple snippets i have saved in some places, so i might repost those on my own as i find them, but there's very few of those. the good news is that anything longer (proper writing — oneshots, hcs, yan alphabet responses and so on, prompt responses, etc) is safely backed up where i originally wrote it! some of it is also on my ao3, which is the same username. feel free to send me asks about any you'd like to see again and i'll repost them! i might not post them if i feel too embarrassed about/wish i hadn't posted them, and i might rewrite/heavily edit some of them, but i think there's only a handful that fall into the former category and none of them were particularly popular. either way, no harm in asking!

as for some other updates: i'm a little divided on whether i want to keep posting explicit nsfw or not so we'll see. i might just keep it out of main tags. idk yet. regardless of what decision i make, this blog is still strictly 18+ and that will not be changing. since we can reply from sideblogs now, this is a sideblog and not my main now. why? sometimes i prefer to check up on a blog frequently instead of following them for a couple of reasons, but this felt very awkward when they were following me. so this being a sideblog relieves a bit of that stress. if this makes it sound like i have severe brain worms, it's because i do. to that effect though, if we interact every so often feel free to consider us mutuals regardless of whether or not i'm actually following you =w=b tbh i.............. am not really into genshin anymore. i might post about it here and there but i just Do Not (really) Care about it anymore. scara aside to some degree i also have no clue what's going on post inazuma lol whatever projects or commitments to writing or etc i had made beforehand. i forgot all of them so just pretend that never happened ok? ok i'll also probably be posting more sparsely, but we'll see! and (this is obviously the most important bit) i have no clue where i put the mika edit so we're back to my og classic pfp. the header scales terribly and is temporary, please ignore that too

all that aside, as a treat for anyone who sees this in time,

*roughly 6/22 done, but fairly quick to write. roughly one paragraph per character (sneak peek line: "it's not too hard to be discreet with his unique magic when someone really deserves to fall face down a flight of stairs. or three. oopsie. odd they don't remember it, huh? well, he had nothing to do with that.") **more realistic isn't quite the right word(s)... probably won't post this one to the main tags regardless. won't be doing all of the characters (only important/relevant ones) and won't be writing more about/expanding on, so this one is just like. a one off experiment sort of thing. overall less violent than most takes on the au + leans a bit (or lot, depending on how you look at it) more on the religious aspect of self aware aus. i wrote a couple paragraphs a while ago, then rewrote them, but i'll only finish/post them if there's interest for it (sneak peek line: "aether has deluded himself and cast You aside entirely on his own—and when You finally grace them with Your real presence, zhongli is certain aether will be the first to fall from Your grace.")

i have one other new thing immediately ready for posting that'll get posted in a couple of days but that one's pretty silly

#koinotame #and hi to the three people that found this blog before i posted this o/#long post #i ended up writing a lot. ehem.#<- the type to always have trouble getting essays down to the max word limit #if nobody ends up seeing this. well. it'll be here still when i post some actual writing #q

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lovely-menza · 2 years ago

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It's me (again) tag!

Tagged by @blackccelebration to do this thingy, thank you so much!! I sort of remember of doing a tag like this long ago but now we can update it yay!1!!!! 💜💜

1 - Are you named after anyone?

Not really, after a song yes, the other one is just because mum liked the name and I like to think it's because a medieval weapon but that's just me ksjdksjs

2 - When was the last time you cried?

Uhm I cry all the time, but last time it was last tuesday at the bus stop 💀💀💀

3 - Do you have kids?

Nope fortunately, but I do have a dog who is just like a kid! (just turned 1 this month) and the other one is just like an old man (turned 15 this month) but I love them

4 - Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Not all the time, I come as pretty sincere even when it's the perfect moment to let out my wittiness, but that's when I pay a lot of attention, I suck at being witty sometimes :')

5 - What's the first thing you notice about people?

I remember writing something like 'their face expression when I'm talking to them' which still stands today xD no but seriously, I'm still insecure and sometimes worry about how do people perceive me, but I think it also has to do to the fact that I like face expressions and structures a lot lol

6 - What's your eye colour?

Brown, even if the sunlight flashes in it goes from dark brown to light brown and no other variation, some of us are boring asf okay?

7 - Scary movies or happy endings?

Idk what is this supposed to mean but I like scary movies with any endings!!!

8 - Any special talents?

Obsessing over dead pe- Okay actually I think drawing portraits or faces (once again me looking at people's faces) and uhm... instruments count? I just play bass as you've seen jmhskdhsksj but then again I'll keep with art and maybe my good interaction with any pet

9 - Where were you born?

Argentina WORLD CHAMPION PAPÁ ⭐⭐⭐

(in Buenos Aires btw)

10 - What are your hobbies?

Playing bass lmao, also drawing since I went on and off by MANY YEARS ALREADY it's frustrating but I'll work on that!! and uh, collecting vinyl records? I don't go out and hunt that much but when I do I don't buy literally anything, I have a little collection of things I adore rather than just keeping lots of records I won't listen to that much

Btw my last finding was Reggatta De Blanc 1986 press record kajskahskajd

11 - Have you any pets?

As I already mentioned two dogs with their respective ages! the baby one is called Bonita (or Bonnie/Lola for the friends) who I adopted 6 months after my doggie Lila passed away :( and the oldie but goldie is Ciro, who's still alive after the fucking mess he was all his life, I adopted him as a weeks-old puppy but he's stray at heart lol

12 - What sports do you play/have played?

I only played volleyball and softball at school, I didn't like softball a lot but volleyball is always fun

pity I dropped out because I couldn't play with my mates - as an outcast myself they'd always play with their friends except me :]

13 - How tall are you?

I'm around 1,65 or 1,68 idk I wish I was a tiny bit taller sometimes hhhh

14 - Favourite subject in school?

Either was the music-related subjects I had in highschool (I don't even remember the names now but it were two branches of it) or history, philosophy... can't think of any other

15 - Dream job?

Living off from art I think, any lol

Now I have to tag 15 blogs? damn okay here you go: @the-rippers, @lil-melody, @outlandos-d-amour, @l0st-d0gs, @crampdown, @thespiritofvexation, @dy3rs3v3 , @viktoria-sob, @larsgoingtomars, @musicrunsthroughmysoul, @themagicalmysticalboy, @jeffament, @princessleiaqueen, @overthinkinks & @itbe1964 Of course you know this is optional so you can ignore and go on with yer life :D

#maiden's tags #what a fucking mess and it's just january you all

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spectrearia · 1 year ago

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double-tag time lol

got tagged in two different question things by @galactictides52 and @gonturan0 xD gonna fill both of 'em out at the same time I guess haha! thanks for the tags!!

going under a cut because there's quite a lot here haha

tagged by @galactictides52:

Last song I listened to: Follow by Survive Said the Prophet

Favorite content to watch: uhhh.. hm. depends on my mood. I usually gravitate towards let's plays or documentaries on a whole variety of topics? speedrunning, electronics, abandoned places, and critiques on a wide variety of media are some of my go-tos for documentary/commentary-style content. there's a lot more tho that I can't think of off the top of my head. I just like listening to people discuss random stuff haha.

Favorite games: Oooh, quite a few. Minecraft, Super Mario Sunshine, Luigi's Mansion, Professor Layton, Ace Attorney, Hitman (World of Assassination), and recently Hatsune Miku: Project Diva Mega Mix are some that immediately come to mind. There are so many more games I could add but I gotta keep this kinda simple xD

Favorite colors: I love all colors for various reasons but any shade of purple is my absolute fave <3

Favorite animal: CATS!!! though I'm sure that's pretty obvious, haha xD I can't help but relate to them so much lol

Favorite food: mmmm. maybe my mom's beef and potato hash? it's the ultimate comfort food to me and she doesn't make it often, but it always Hits Just Right whenever I do get to have it.

Sweet, spicy, or savory: savory all the way, baby. don't mind a bit of spice alongside the savory sometimes but it depends on what it is.

Current obsession: my own OCs (and some friends' OCs as well). I literally talk about them all the time and I could say I'm sorry but I'm really not. xD if we're talking media in general tho? I guess the Hatsune Miku game I mentioned earlier counts, lol

Last book I read: oof. I can't even remember. for published books, I want to say it was Mayday at Two Thousand Five Hundred by Frank E. Peretti? but if not, then it was probably my friend's original story draft. I hardly ever read anymore, honestly. I just write what I want to read instead.

Last thing I googled: don't use google, per se. but I think the last thing I searched online was the lyrics to King by Kanaria because I want to learn how to sing along lol

Fun facts: I always suck at these haha. can't really think of anything so I might just have to leave this as-is, rip ><;;

---

tagged by @gonturan0:

3 ships: lol I don't do ships so I don't have much to put here xD I guess I kinda "shipped" some characters when I was younger (like Mario and Peach or whatever), but not? to an extreme degree or anything? was never my focus. still isn't. Honorable mention does go out to Kim Possible and Ron Stoppable, though. I felt their relationship was handled really well, even though I typically really don't like romance in kids' media at all.

first ever ship: idk probably Mickey and Minnie when I was like 5??? haha

last song: (see #1 in previous list)

Last movie: oof, memory is bad. it's been a while. the Mario movie???? in theaters??? i think. I can't remember. I don't watch movies as often as I used to tbh

currently reading: nothing right now, unless you count this list ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

currently watching: not "currently" but I'll probably watch the newest update of a Voices of the Void let's play that I'm keeping up with sometime later tonight :0

currently consuming: waterrr. stay hydrated, my dudes~

currently craving: sushi;;; specifically my Fave Big Roll with shrimp tempura, crab, cucumber, and a bunch of other good stuff (also SPICY MAYO, my beloved) <33

ayyyy, that's all, folks! I don't really know who to tag with this so i guess if anyone sees it and wants to fill it out, u can just say I tagged you xD I don't mind, haha!

#ask game #tagged for me #spectre says #i initially wasn't gonna do these but i figured . hey - why not xD

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boba-beom · 2 years ago

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smilesss c:

hiii! sorry i have been m.i.a for so long, but i finally made it, both flights were terrible, but it's okay because i have had such an amazing time so far. can't believe i'll be flying back in a week :/

OMGGGG how's it going with island guy, i hope you had an amazing time together ahh i'm so excited for the future updates of I Like U now, but take your time, no pressure!! is there something there between you though? did you feel anything?

that's true, thank you🥺❤️ i recently picked up my electric guitar now that i've come home and even though i haven't played in such a long time, i was surprised with how quick i picked up some songs or how easily i remembered others. it made me think about how sometimes there are some things in our lives that we stop doing because so many things get in the way and we lose touch with them, until we discover them again. the feelings i experienced when i was playing the same songs i used to play are honestly indescribable, it was as if nothing else mattered, but that beautiful melody. it made me realise how much i miss performing too❤️ i was wondering if that has ever happened to you too?

i just know beomjun would slay so hard, manifesting fr. when enhypen niki and jungwon did it, i was in awe and i couldn't stop thinking about yeonjun and beomgyu doing one. they could easily suit any genre, but i'm thinking something dark would look so good.

ooooh, i'm excited for the rest of your 80s oneshots - the taehyun one was just *chef's kiss*. and omg beomgyu's look for dream week lives in my head rent free - he looked like an 80s heartthrob. happy late beomgyu day btw🥺❤️

thank you so much smiles❤️, i'm just glad they're finally over. i hate exam season so much. it's always so stressful.

how are you doing though? how's writing going? i have this yeonjun oneshot that i've been working on for over a year now, it's so long and i'm almost finished, i just have three scenes left to write before i get into the editing process lol. i'm the type of writer that takes a long time to produce something and seeing how fast other writers produce pieces makes me feel a bit like i'm missing out? idk if that's the right word, but i wish i could write something good that fast sometimes, but i've also come to terms with the fact that everyone has their own pace when it comes to writing. some write faster, some write slower, but the end product is always amazing❤️

hi lovely, I'm sorry the flights were terrible, but how is it being home?

as for the island guy, he's coming next week I think, so we'll see if he'll come visit me or not ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I'm not too fussed about it really. he greeted me on my birthday, not really a greeting, more like a banter "you're getting older" message but yeah other than that I don't really think anything is going on atm :/

that's so beautiful, april 🥹 I haven't played my guitar for a long while, so I feel like when I do have the time and get back into doing it, I would most likely rediscover that feeling again :') I love that for you though, I find it so satisfying when the muscle memory kicks in, yano?

thank you!! I just saw your rb and your feedback just made me so happy, thank you and I'm really glad you liked it a lot! I feel like I'm going to hinder the 80s fics for a little while until I'm satisfied enough with the amount of uni work I have to do for my coursework. my deadline is in 6 weeks and I don't want to rush things so that's why I haven't been as active on here :') happy late beomgyu day too! <3

as for your writing, take as much time as you need. it is for you after all and we just have the privilege to read people's shared works/imaginations. I'm rooting for you and I hope you tag me whenever you do post it <3 but you're right! everyone's writing journey is different but the outcome is always just as beautiful! and I'm doing okay! I've been busying myself! I had a uni trip last week and then went home for my birthday in the same week, so I'm a little exhausted lmao, so the past week I've just been staying in uni longer than usual and doing work which I'm happy with! beomgyu's birthday post was the last thing I've written for a while, everything else has just been in bullet points for now until I have time to write everything in full :> I hope you've been well since you sent this ask!

#april ♡#aprilisque ♡#ᥫ᭡ : asks.#[ 🧸 ] — mutuals.

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zeawesomebirdie · 2 years ago

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I hope I can still send you asks and you can answer them? Just to say that I'm trying to do the Snarry rec list but my memory is SO BAD lol there are a few I know have to go on there but otherwise? I'm going to have to reread so much fic..... Not that it's an imposition of course, but it does feel weird taking a look through my collection and realising 1) there are less fics than I thought and 2) I can't associate any summary to so many of the titles! Where has my Snarry knowledge gone!! Anyway I realise I forgot to rec you Diagnosis by MaidenMotherCrone for Tomarry fics, which is an error because I'm not sure I'd want to reread it but it's really a Whole Thing in an overall positive way. Also I never gave you the name of the absolute epic I felt weird reccing on main because there's some niche kinks in it? Obviously you don't seem like you open a 500k fic and come out of it a week later without having done anything else but read it, given what you've said about taking breaks in Pacify (which tbh fair. A lot of stuff happens there) so giving you a 800k fic series on top of all the rest seemed a lot you know :') but whenever you want, you know where to find me hehe. Anyway I'll go like brush my teeth and all, hope this sends, bye bye!!

Looks like I can still receive asks! Whether or not you’ll be notified when I answer this (and I guess, also whether or not tumblr will even allow me to post it,,,) still remains to be seen, but based on last night’s experiment with @’ing you, you won’t be notified. I’ll try to keep my reblogging to a minimum until you’ve seen this!!

For what it’s worth, I did send in another support ticket this morning, but I’ll update my pinned post with that info after I’ve answered this

There is no rush at all for the snarry rec list!! Take your time beloved!! I agree that rereading all that fic isn’t all that bad of a thing, but omg, it must be so daunting to have that list to go through, even if it’s shorter than you thought it was! I mean, I’m sitting here with 12 pages in my marked for later tab on Ao3, while entirely forgetting to read both the fic I currently have open and the books I have from the library lol, so I can def relate to having a list to read through. Just please don’t feel rushed or even obligated, you have the best recs but really it’s okay if I wait for it!

(but tbh, at this point I’ve read enough snarry that I feel like I could make an actual rec list myself, even if like 90% of my bookmarks have come from the @houseofsnarry discord. I might have to do that. No one has asked for my recs since I totally flubbed that one ask requesting my quiobi recs and I revealed that at the time I wasn’t really reading, but now I read so much more, even if it’s primarily snarry and irl books. Idk. I’ll have to think about it and also wait until I get un-shadowbanned, and also also I’ll have to read a little bit more so I can round out any list like that,,,)

Omg so Diagnosis looks like an absolutely incredible fic 👀 that summary, those tags!! No worries about not remembering anything other than the positive vibes, I’ve loved literally everything you’ve rec’d thus far and I’m sure I’ll love this too!

Feel free to drop the name of that longfic btw 👀👀👀👀 I don’t often go for fics over 150k unless they come highly recommended, but most of the time I do finish them really quickly. I got through Unrestrained by Lizzy00305 in three days, All the Young Dudes by MsKingBean89 in about a week and a half, and, while they’re obv not fic, I did read the first five HP books in 8 days, and then HBP and DH in about a week and a half. It depends on what’s going on irl and how into the fic I am tbch.

Rn it’s taking me forever to get through Transparency by oldesthuntress even though it’s literally my favourite fic of all time only because I have so much going on irl. My fatigue will catch up to me soon enough, and all I’ll be capable of doing (affectionate) soon will be reading and animal crossing, and even if I can’t read it for a little bit, I do have surgery right before Christmas which will mean only reading for a few weeks!

(for what it’s worth, I’m currently planning to save Pacify for after surgery, because tbch I think that’s the perfect read for when I’ll be stuck in bed for two weeks!)

But anyway! Yes please drop that link! No fic is too long if it comes highly recommended!!

All my love to you beloved, I hope the rest of your day goes well!! Thanks for stopping in!!

#anon ☂️#beloved #love you Ram!!#always great to hear from you <3 #and I genuinely love so much when an ask takes me 30+ minutes to answer <333 #one of the best parts of tumblr ngl!#have a good day!!

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creepesthesia · 5 months ago

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introduction, sera. 💜

Hi! My name is Seth (or Sethesis). She/her pronouns, however you really can use any, it's just that I understand she/her applied to me better.

Quick summary:

Destiny & The Elder Scrolls fandom dweller, as most of this blog will probably be.

I'm a welding engineer, but I do art for fun, so that means I'm a self-taught artist. Whatever I draw is usually black and white (god save greyscale). I also love portraits & character designing!

I reblog using @sethesisthesia, might post thoughts here too sometimes. Feel free to DM me if you want, I'll try to respond. I swear I'm nice.

discord: creepesthesia ◽ telegram: creepesthesia

You can read more info in my full blog (like in the browser... idk). Do if you're curious. I don't mind. Have fun.

IMPORTANT INFORMATION BELOW THE CUT

On 8 october 2024, Discord got unreasonably blocked in Russia. Discord, Tumblr and Telegram remain the only services I have free access to that can provide me with ways to contact friends, communicate with foreigners directly, express myself and find important art/work-related materials and advice.

If I will ever go offline for over than 3 months, I'm either in a deep burnout state (which is. unlikely. trust me. both @sethesisthesia and @creepesthesia count as a tracker of my activity) or my fucked-up country probably started isolating itself completely, as I said earlier. The second is more likely. That's it. It is a cruel thing to say, and I absolutely despise the way things are here, but I can't change it, so the only thing that I can do is just leave a warning if anything like this ever happens. My pinned post will be updated ABOVE the cut and I'll also post another one, if they ever will start moving towards complete isolation. I don't think it is really possible, as long as we have a list of blocked resources (e.g. like in any other country with mild censorship), and not a list of ALLOWED resources (e.g. like in North Korea). I hope it never happens, and if it does - I hope I won't lose access to the only way to share my art freely and also keep contact with important people in my life.

I know I (might) have close acquaintances here, so if any of you care enough - any means of communication will be mentioned in this case / I'll DM you, though I am still tagged 'creepesthesia' on most social media as I'm the only one who ever used this word as a name/tag.

In the end, it's not only my art blog, it's my personal space too after all. I will always be against unreasonable censorship and dictatorship, and I will always stand for freedom of speech, not only because it is a basic human right, but because censorship directly affects many workfields, lowers and degrades our quality of life, service accessibility and economical development.

It isn't Seth speaking, it's my real-life me speaking, so hear ye! To all people who might be in similar situations and might read this:

stay safe, but never stay silent.

- love, Lina.

#intro post #please read below the cut.

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bluejaysandblackbats · 5 months ago

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Honor in Crisis

Fandom: DC Comics, Batfam, NTT, Titans, JLI, Arrowfam, Flashfam, GL Corps, Infinity Inc

Summary: Every chapter will focus on one character specifically and then I'll update their statuses in order.

This is a no powers au/fix-it fic for Heroes in Crisis. I wanted to focus on the characters and their healing. I decided that'd be easier to put some of these characters in a fic like this and work on it more from a real-world perspective. I DO want to say that I do not believe healing is linear so don't plan on a clear-cut happy ending. I'd say (and idk for sure) we're gonna eventually get a bittersweet ending for certain characters but nothing tragic.

Chapters: 4/?

Characters: Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, Kole Weathers, Lilith Clay, Eddie Bloomberg, Michael Carter, Michelle Carter, Rani Carter, Grant Emerson, Roy Harper, Grant Wilson, Joseph Wilson, Thaddeus Thawne, Bart Allen, Helen Claiborne, President Thawne, Todd Rice, Alan Scott (DCU), Damon Matthews

Relationship(s): Damon Matthews/Todd Rice

Additional Tags: No Powers AU, Canon Divergent AU, Fix-It Fic, Angst, TW // Self-harm

Chapter Four: Father's Day (Michael's POV)

Michael absentmindedly bounced Rani on his knee. He knew she wanted to show him something, but he wasn't sure if he could handle it. Michelle hadn't said much of anything, which worried him. "Can I show you now, Mikey?" Rani asked. He rested his chin on top of her head.

"Yeah, I'd like that," Michael whispered. Rani pulled a picture out of her folder.

"I drew it for you. See, this is you, and this is Michelle, and this is Boppy, and this is me," Rani explained as she pointed everyone out. The picture she drew of herself was crying, and as soon as Michael saw it, he let out a shaky breath.

"Why are you sad?" Michael asked. He didn't want to cry in front of her, but he couldn't ignore her feelings to protect his own. She hesitated, wringing her hands with shame. Was that what he taught her? He wondered if bottling up his feelings hurt her as much as he imagined.

"Because I miss you being at home," Rani's voice broke, and she turned to look up at him with her big brown eyes. Michael hadn't seen Rani since he'd hurt himself. He'd been putting off explaining things to her for so long, but it was unavoidable now. He couldn't look her in the eyes and tell her a lie. It was just a matter of her asking the right questions. He knew she would. Rani was an intelligent kid, and she wouldn't accept any old answer that he had to offer. It had to be the truth. "Why can't you come home?"

Michael took a deep breath. "I felt overwhelmed by my feelings recently, and I kept all those thoughts and feelings to myself. I didn't get help in time, and I hurt myself. So, now I'm here to figure out how to talk about those things so that I don't try to hurt myself again," Michael explained. He was surprised he managed to say all that without crying.

"Do you still want to hurt yourself?" Rani asked.

Of course, she wouldn't let him off that easy. He didn't plan on her asking that question. He opened his mouth to answer her, but his throat felt tight. Michael couldn't move himself to look at Michelle. He knew he couldn't hold himself together if he could see her face. "Mhm... Yes, I—. I think about it a lot, but that's no one's fault," Michael replied, "I want to come home to you as soon as I can, though."

"I got the puzzle you just finished," Rani whispered, "Can you do a Care Bears one for me next time?"

"If you bring me a really cool one next week," Michael replied on accident before looking up at Michelle. He expected her to be angry with him, but she was smiling.

Rani smiled too. Maybe that was a good thing. "Can I really come back next week?" Rani asked.

"Of course, if it's okay with Michelle... I'd like that," Michael whispered. He kissed the top of her head. "I've missed you a whole lot, Rani." He closed his eyes to force back his tears.

"Will you keep my picture?" Rani asked. Michael nodded.

"Mhm... But can you do me a favor? Would you mind drawing me another picture while you're here?" Michael asked.

Rani pulled out her box of crayons and her folder and set them on the table. She sat at the table, and Michelle finally walked over to Michael and sat next to him. "How're you doing, Mike?" Michelle asked.

"Thank you for bringing her," Michael whispered. He couldn't move himself to answer her question. It was too much too soon. He just wanted to enjoy this while he could. "How're you?"

"I'm not mad at you if that's what you're thinking. I just think you're stupid," Michelle joked. He tried to smile, but he couldn't.

"I keep screwing up, don't I?" Michael asked. Running away from the issue wasn't helping him. "I don't want things to be like this... Especially not for her. I don't want to be like—."

"Don't say like Dad... You're nothing like Dad. He left us because he wanted to," Michelle whispered, "And you've never hurt Rani. You never hurt anyone if you can help it—."

"But those are excuses... I don't want to make excuses anymore. I just wanna be better. I wanna feel better. I wanna be a better dad, a better brother, a better friend," Michael corrected her, "And I've gotta start taking life more seriously."

Michelle messed up his hair. "I take back what I said, you know... You're not stupid. You do a lot of stupid stuff, but I love you," Michelle whispered, "And Rani and Rip love you. We just want you to be okay."

"It'll be okay... It has to be," Michael replied. He felt hopeful, but it didn't make things hurt any less. "Staying out of trouble, Rani?"

She turned to him and then back to her drawing. "Why? Did Boppy say something?" Rani asked.

"No, but I think you have something to tell me," Michael whispered as he sat next to her on the floor. "I get on his nerves, so I get it. Let's hear it."

"I might've lost his notebook, but I didn't think it was important... I just needed some paper," Rani replied.

"What was in the notebook, Rani?" Michael asked.

"Boppy's field notes," Rani mumbled.

"Oof, I've done that before. If you haven't already, you owe him an apology," Michael whispered, "And if you can let Rip know I'd like to see him next time, I'd really appreciate it." He pinched her cheek to let her know he wasn't angry.

Michael looked at the progress of the picture Rani drew, and she described everything in great detail. When it was time to go, she left the drawing with him, and he rushed back to his room to fall apart. He sat on his bed and started hyperventilating. "Mike?" Eddie asked. "Mike, are you okay?"

Michael wiped his tears away. His hands shook, and the tears continued to fall. "I saw my daughter today... And I had to tell her why I can't come home," Michael answered. Eddie sat next to him.

"You told her the truth?" Eddie asked. Michael nodded. "Well, that's more than my parents ever did for me. They told me I was visiting my aunt and never came back for me. At least you told your kid something real.

Michael looked up at Eddie. "I—I didn't know that. Eddie, for what it's worth... I think you're a great kid," Michael whispered, "I know that there's more life than this for you... But, I guess it's easy to see it from the outside." Eddie nodded.

"Parents are allowed to screw up, you know?" Eddie replied. "The trick is all in the recovery. How're you gonna prove that you're a better dad than you were?"

"I gotta get off the bench," Michael replied as he collected himself, "Thanks, Eddie."

"No problem, and nice sports metaphor," Eddie smiled. Michael smiled. Maybe he had hope of turning things around after all.

#fic #hic fic #Michael Carter #Michelle Carter #Rani Carter #No Powers AU #Canon Divergent AU #Fix-It Fic #Angst #TW // Self-harm

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