#idk how people handle falling in love. this like barely is even a crush or anything and I want to bash my head into a wall | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

zoofles · 1 year ago

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Life update but tw for drug talk/OD/drugging/abuse yada yada

Here’s Very very cute little thingy my partner crafted with emojis somehow to be a spacer. He is just a litl robot who is crushing hard on the virus glitching his all-ware (me. I’m the guy making him malfunction!!!!!💥)

anyway life update!! tw for drugging and overdose again! But me and my bf were drugged and experienced the worst bad trips ever. I OD’d completely and nearly died. I also now know I have POTS/a cardiac condition separate to POTS and DID (NOT schizophrenia…the voices who were my friends with lives and personalities were actually alters and I was front stuck 💪 also we do not call ourselves alters but HEADBITCHES! It’s just that alters is too medical or formal?? Idk we all friends). It’s great to finally know wtf is going on. lol. But anyway. I’ve been extraordinarily sick and WORSE since the drug incident.

Found out that not one, but TWO of the people I loved, trusted and gave my world to betrayed me, lied to me/covered up their lies to avoid consequences/accountability which hurt me SO deeply upon finding out on my OWN (yeah they didn’t even have the guts to tell me and just went on living and talking to me like they hadn’t backstabbed me) that I couldn’t even afford to grieve because I risked a heart attack from the stress, emotions and stabbing pain. Had to dissociate it away to process later. Maybe another 3 or so years will do the trick? No clue.

We’ve got the best little robo partner tho!!!!!!! 💥💥💥he’s helped us all through this. Plus Banjoh and everyone else are so supportive and there with me on these …discoveries. Being cheated on and lied to sucks! BEING DRUGGED SUXXXXX. Being so alone in discovering trauma/what truly happened to you sucks. Escaping abuse and hopelessness on your own because the people who promised to help you and convinced you to place all your bets on them before they bailed on you leaving you helpless, vulnerable, alone and betrayed sucks. My life so far has been nothing but misery. I nearly gave up multiple times because of how worthless i felt, because every time I tried to escape the misery I was cast further into it. Every day I felt discarded, replaced, worthless, a burden who people were relieved to abandon after years of pressuring me to open up and trust them, only to let me watch them grow happier with someone else. I felt like my situation, my pain and the abuse I endured was a heavy and disgusting mass on my shoulders, something nobody deserved to see or share or carry for me. I hid away. I even gave into the abuse at one point because life had taught me that even the people who promised to help me, wouldn’t. I couldn’t escape on my own. I was trapped, cornered by the careful thinking of my abusers. I needed help, but could no longer ask for it because life had taught me that only ended in blood and tears. Never trust anyone, no matter how hard they try to make you trust them, to rely on them, lean on them, love them with your whole heart…just don’t. They won’t feel anything when they decide to stop caring, when they realise you weren’t lying about being heavy with suffering. They won’t look back when they leave for someone more convenient, more comfortable, more …NOT you.

if it weren’t for the final, tiny, damp spark that was the words in my head saying ‘one last time…’ with my current partner. ..I wouldn’t be here. My life has been hardship after hardship. Physically, I’m chronically unwell and can’t live without constantly worrying about my extremely delicate health. It’s only gotten worse now with my heart. Mentally, my mind is fundamentally broken and formed differently to a healthy brain due to being tortured from 3 years old. Emotionally, I’m weak and fragile, I can barely handle simple stresses without falling apart. But god, even though shits gotten worse, at the same time it’s gotten better.

George, I know you’ll read this because you read everything I write. I know you’ll know what I’m talking about, that you’ll understand. I know you’ll look at me with the same eyes and lean in to hug me once you’re done reading.

In 2020, I nearly let myself die because I thought nothing else but death could free me from the heart ache and shattering emotional pain I felt physically every day. I decided to hang on because of shame, thinking I wasn’t worthy enough to kms.

In 2021 I got into an abusive relationship. I was abused physically, emotionally and sexually every day and I had no way out but to go back to my abusive home. I did go back, and I nearly died once more.

In 2022, I barely remember anything. The days blurred together and nothing felt real. It all felt like the grey mass had spread to my brain and made me dumb. I felt like static. A single, dull tone that rang on and on and never stopped. I was given a life saving surgery, I remember that. It stopped one of my chronic pains from destroying me for a temporary amount of time. The pain had been bedridden, crying out and vomiting in my sheets.

But then there was you. I remember the day so well…I was deleting every app I had that allowed me to meet new people. Dating apps, friends, all. I have never had any friends before, nobody real who actually loved me, or cared enough to stay beyond when I was being used for something. Nobody seemed to work out. I thought “I’ve used up my love, huh. That was my last chance, and it hurt so bad that I won’t ever be able to fall in love again. Even though that’s all I’ve ever wanted…someone to love, and someone to love me.” And with the last app before me I used up the last of my swipes before I was supposed to delete it and never try again. I was supposed to drift after that, drift and obey until I died…but you happened and ruined it all.

I only paused because your face felt familiar, I thought maybe I’d seen you once before. Maybe a “friend” knew you.

We started talking, and all of a sudden I felt a tiny smile crease my lips. That hadn’t happened since …

We spoke and spoke all night, relating our interests and goals. We met the next day, and all day I realised over and over again; you’re just like me. I don’t mean the similar surface level stuff like the fact that you liked to draw, or had characters you loved to think about, or you had games I knew of…I mean that you were like me. You almost gave up, you’d been tricked into loving people who only saw you as something to pass the time. Nobody you loved ever loved you the same way you did; even if they insisted they did. That when you said “I’ll never not love you, I won’t leave unless you want me to” to past lovers you MEANT it. You were damaged. You were broken apart and had given so much of yourself away and used up so much of your heart to just keep yourself alive that you weren’t sure if you were really alive anymore at all. All you wanted was love. Pure, kind and patient love. That when you look into the future you only ever wanted to see someone with you. You were alone but not by choice.

10 months later and here we are, sitting side by side, sleeping and keeping each other warm simply by blood and thoughts. I never thought I’d trust anyone ever again, nor love again…yet here we are. Every day we look at each other and think “I’m so glad I kept going. I’m so glad you understand. I’m so SORRY that you had to be wounded over and over so that your stolen flesh revealed your vulnerable insides to me…only so i could see you for who you are and recognise that we had the same heart. I love you, and I know you won’t leave until I leave, but that won’t happen. Because who in their right mind would EVER leave such a beautiful thing behind?”

I love you, thank you. And you are always welcome, welcome here with me.

#📺💚#bias banter #vent

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ladyelainehilfur · 2 years ago

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Ooooh thoughts on Nice to Meet You's ending?

bruv....real life image of me entering the comment section of the last episode:

I know a lot of people feel very strongly about Nice To Meet You's ending. And well, I also have ✨opinions✨

For one, I'm not the kind of person to assume that just because a male character is on the cover, that he's going to be endgame. I had no real expectation that Daze was fated to end the series dating Mew.

Frankly, I barely found Daze engaging as a character. His most memorable moment to me was that scene where he helped Mew walk through the murder of crows to the phone booth. Butterflies ✅ invested in him as a character ❌

He's sweet enough, but overall, I thought he was kind of boring. Don't @ me but I'm pretty sure a lot of people only liked him because he was hot.

Does that mean I was Mew x Wyn shipper? Nah. That entire first season, I was extremely convinced Wyn was aroace. I should've known it was too good to be true. An equally attractive best friend to the male lead with NO interest in the female lead? We could've had it all.

I adore Wyn as a character. He's cute, fun, funny, good-looking, and supportive. His mullet is sick. His outfits are slay. He's basically perfect...but not for Mew, imo. Him falling for Mew was startling.

However, Mew is very lovable in the typical clumsy anime girl way. I just thought the story would become about her journey to self-actualization and idk...following her dreams or something. Not knocking on the romance, but season one was just so strong and handled her character so well. I was impressed that she rose above expectations and handled the theatre crush situation on her own, more or less.

But season two...girlie what even happened. It became all about her having to decide between Wyn and Daze. That would've been fine if it wasn't so heavily focused on her crushing and blushing and looking down at her shoes shyly. I didn't think Mew was weak or annoying, but the writing did her a major disservice in the second season.

One thing I'll say is that I really liked that neither Daze or Wyn were competitive or possessive of Mew. I despise love triangles, usually because they treat the female lead like an object to win, or they resort to bullying and pulling each other down to end up with the girl. It's like "guys, GUYS, why are we fighting over (1) girl when there are so many fish in the ocean".

But Nice To Meet You hopped right over that trope and had Wyn and Daze mutually agree to let Mew choose. They literally let each other have moments with Mew at their own expense. It was really sweet. I liked it.

But the ending still flopped 🙊 what do you MEAN a 3 year time skip????????? I feel like I'm the only one who was genuinely flabbergasted by Mew's painting of Daze. Was it supposed to mean something?? And if so, why did we never get an explicit answer?? Mew crying tells me nothing.

As I said, I ship neither Daze nor Wyn with Mew. I wasn't disappointed that she chose Wyn, but I was confused about why. I had so many questions.

Why did Daze give up on her? Why did Mew need to take a trip for that long? Where did she go? Why did she she cry while painting Daze? Was she letting go of her feeling for him? Did Daze never find someone else? Did Mickey just keep his unrequited crush on Daze for 3 more years? Why was Wyn willing to wait that long for an answer? What's Mew's brother up to? Did Simon follow him? Was Mew so hesitant to start a new relationship because her last one was abusive? What even happened to her ex? Why doesn't she talk about him more? Is Daze's dream to run a coffee shop? What's Wyn's career? Are they all still in college?

A three year time skip is just way too long.

More importantly, I do not like Wyn with black hair!!

I wasn't a ride-or-die Nice To Meet You fan, but I still had all these questions. I can't imagine how its biggest fans felt about the ending. Well, no, I can. That comment section on the last episode is brutal. I'm sure the creator had a reason for rushing the series to a close, but I feel the fans are equally justified in being very frustrated by the unanswered questions and Mew suddenly ending up with Wyn when I think most were lead to believe the painting meant Daze was endgame.

6/10 ending, what a bummer ending for a series with such good art and characters.

#nice to meet you #webtoon #I really must emphasize the art is awesome #I'd reread just to experience the art and take screen shots #ask #answered

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justauthoring · 3 years ago

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control.

request(s): Nick and Abigail aren’t a thing, as Nick has a thing for reader, and reader has a thing for Nick. BUT nick, due to in process of turning, still has that rather… suggestive moment with Abigail when holding her upon discovering kaylees body, so reader distances themselves and finds comfort in say Dylan, Ryan or even one of the gals in the pool house, Nick lashes out and then the transformation happens… time skip to reunite in the morning, after Silas is dealt with. OR, sweet moment b4 transform? Hey I saw you're taking requests for The Quarry stories so I'd like to make one! I have a mega crush on Nick (that accent does things to me), and I have this idea floating around my head that werewolf Nick ends up hurting the (female) reader pretty bad and then after the curse has lifted, has to deal with that fact and he's really upset about it. IDK I'm just a sucker for angst! *control: the power to influence or direct people's behavior or the course of events.

a/n: his accent does things to me too :) i don’t care what anyone says -- i love nick and none of what he did was in his control.

word count: 2,293

warnings: ...turning into a werewolf?

Your first thought was to latch onto Nick for comfort.

He was the one you trusted the most amongst the camp counselors, and it felt like pure instinct to go to him. The sight of dead body was a sight you’d thought never possible before the start of this night -- but it was a reality now, and you couldn’t stop the discomfort that flooded you at the sight. A body, dead in the water was both terrifying and horrifying and you felt it was only natural you reached out for some sort of comfort.

However, when you turn to Nick, your lips part at the sight of him already holding Abigail. He had a hand pressed against the back of her head, tucking her into the crook of his neck and the other wrapped tightly around her waist. And despite everything, the body, the events of the night, a bout of jealousy and hurt flooded your entire being at the sight.

You’d had a crush on Nick since the beginning of summer; swooned by his accent at first, only to learn how kind and gentle he really was. He was pretty quiet, sure, but you’d gotten close enough to him that when it was just the two of you he was quite witty and funny. He never failed to make you laugh, and the need to be near him didn’t seem one sided at all -- in fact, you’d been pretty sure he’d reciprocated your feelings.

But this... this felt like maybe you’d been imagining things.

Swallowing thickly, you drown out Ryan’s words, only managing to hear something about the body being Kaylee Hackett -- that made you feel even more sick -- and you spin around. Stood slightly behind Nick, you could hardly handle the sight of him and Abigail or the body. Pressing a hand firmly against your stomach, you’re barely aware of a pair of eyes on you until a hand falls on your shoulder.

“H-Hey, Y/N?”

Blinking, you realize it’s Dylan talking to you, his good hand on your shoulder as he squeezes it reassuringly. He looks concerned as he stares down at you, leaning to meet your height. “Are you okay?”

“I’m...” You pause, the words feeling stuck in the back of your throat as you can’t help but glance over your shoulder at Nick and Abigail. You don’t realize it, but Dylan follows your gaze and a frown mares his lips as he realizes what’s upsetting you. His eyes are already on you as you turn back to him, pressing a hand to your lips, unable to finish your words.

“Hey, it’s okay,” he calls softly, pulling you to his side with his hand. You fall into his side easily, appreciating his kindness and soothing words as you press your face into his shoulder, sniffling slightly. The events of the night were becoming too much, and seeing the boy you liked so much comforting and holding another girl so close was like the cherry on top.

“Oh man.... Poor Kaylee,” you hear Kaitlyn mumble, pulling you to move your gaze away from Dylan and over to the body once more.

You tense slightly at the sight of it and Dylan squeezes you gently.

“Nick...”

Pausing at the sound of Abigail’s voice, your gaze flickers over to her, brows furrowing.

“You smell so good...”

It’s undeniably Nick’s voice and you’re both jealous and disturbed at his words. By the way Abigail’s pushing away from his grip, you can tell she’s uncomfortable at the way he’s huddling so close to her, pressing his nose into the nape of her neck. But you don’t understand why he’s latching onto Abigail like that when they’d hardly spoken all summer.

“You alright there, buddy? Maybe dial it back a bit, huh?” Kaitlyn intervenes, stepping forward slightly.

Nick pulls back, eyes set in a harsh glare as he looks at Kaitlyn. “Fuck off, Kaitlyn.”

Surprised at his outburst, you watch with wide eyes -- Nick’s never been the one to be aggressive, and honestly with the way he was treating Abigail, he almost seemed possessive.

Pulling her back close, Abigail is considerably more uncomfortable, pushing at him as he holds her tight against him. “Nick... what are you...?”

You feel your heart fall at his next words.

“I want to taste you...”

“Hey--”

Abigail is interrupted by Nick pulling her close; “come here...”

“Nick, get off-!! Get the hell off!”

She manages to push him off of her, and directly into the water.

Everyone’s stunned silent for a moment, especially when after a few seconds Nick doesn’t resurface. You feel your chest tighten in worry, confused by everything, until suddenly Nick pops back up, screaming. He’s yelling at the top of his lungs, scaring everyone as you jump back into Dylan who grabs onto you tightly.

He’s flailing wildly, but you can’t remember ever hearing Nick say he couldn’t swim--

“I-I just wanted him to stop,” Abigail mumbles, looking at you.

“Nick!” Ryan bellows, “dude!”

“Someone should help him!” You call out, pulling yourself from Dylan’s grasp to reach out for Nick. Ryan is quick to help you and the both of you manage to grab ahold of Nick, pulling him out of the water. Almost instantly his screaming stops and as he falls to the concrete, he huddles close to himself, shivering violently.

Frowning, you set your hand on his shoulder, pulling back with a hiss.

“He’s freezing,” you call out, turning back to Ryan and Dylan.

“O-Okay,” Ryan nods, pointing behind him. “Let’s get him into the pool house. Dry him off.”

Abigail had elected to help Nick, feeling guilty for what happened.

You let her. Of course you were concerned about Nick, but you couldn’t help but feel hurt by his actions -- you knew the both of you weren’t in a relationship, but you felt your feelings for him were pretty obvious and hurt to know that you hadn’t mattered to him as much as you thought.

“You alright?”

Feeling a hand fall on your back, you turn to glance back at Dylan.

He’d been careful to keep an eye on you, obviously concerned about you and you appreciated it. You and Dylan have always gotten along well, and honestly you felt besides Nick you got along with him the best. He was just so witty and sarcastic and it never failed to make you laugh, even when you were on the reciprocating end of one of his jokes.

It meant the world that he’d stuck by you since the incident at the pool.

“Y/N!”

A cry sounds out, spooking you from your thoughts as your gaze snaps over to Nick. Abigail is in front of him, having pulled back at his cry, and by the looks of it, he’d shoved her hand away and was fighting her help.

“I want Y/N.”

You blink at his words, glancing back at Dylan, Ryan and Kaitlyn who stare back at you in surprise and confusion. And then, when you turn back to Nick, Abigail’s looking at you with a deep frown on her lips -- but nonetheless, she stands, you following her shortly after a reassuring nod from Dylan, and she passes you the clothe she’d been using to dry him off with.

You approach him hesitantly, unsure.

He’s already turned to face you the minute you reach him, and you manage a small smile as you crouch before him. “Hey, Nick.”

“Y/N...” He groans, clasping his hurt shoulder tightly.

“Here,” you call out gently, reaching out for him. “I’ll just--”

You pause, Nick’s hand coming out to grasp your own wrist tightly. You wince, the grip pinching as you halt before him, baffled by his reaction. “Nick, what are you--”

“I thought you liked me.”

Eyes widening, you feel yourself freeze at his words.

“Not Dylan!” The words leave in a rushed growl, voice harsh as he tugs you forward, making you lose your balance that you end up falling into him. Your hand falls on the other side of him, to brace yourself, gasping as his grip never relents. You’re closer to him then you’ve ever been, and you find yourself unsure of what to say as he stares up at you, breathless, with his gaze never wavering.

“Nick,” you echo out, voice wavering. “I don’t like Dylan... it’s just, you and Abi were--”

“I don’t like Abigail,” he hisses out, “I like you.”

Your brows furrow, shaking your head; “then--”

“You’re mine.” He states, moving his grip to the back of your neck, pulling you close enough to press your lips against his own. You tense at the action and even though it’s something you’ve wanted to do all summer, you never wanted to do it like this. Where Nick felt he had to prove himself out of jealousy...

Pulling back, you fight Nick’s grip, shaking your head. “What the hell is wrong with you!”

His eyes darken instantly at your words, nails digging into the back of your neck as you hiss out in pain. “You’re mine,” he repeats, voice a low, menacing whisper. “Not Dylan’s. Not Jacob’s. Not anyone else’s but mine!”

“Get off of me!” You bellow out, catching the attention of the others as you try to yank yourself away from his grasp. “Nick! Let me go, please!”

“Hey, what the hell are you doing!!”

“Let her go,” Dylan bellows, his footsteps following as he rushes towards you. “Nick, let go of her!”

Nick scoffs, and then suddenly you’re being tossed back, the force of which not possible for any human. You land against the wall adjacent, a cry leaving your lips as you land on arm wrong, and you can feel the crack of your forearm as you try to gather your bearings. You feel your eyes water, both from the pain and from what had just happened, panting as you look ahead of yourself.

Nick’s stood up now, Dylan, Ryan and Kaitlyn blocking you from his path as Abigail rushes over to you.

“She’s mine! Fuck off!”

For the first time, you’re genuinely terrified of Nick. Something you’d thought never possible.

He races forward, knocking Ryan back, and you realize he’s gunning straight for you. He’s gonna... what, kill you?

As you twist your eyes shut, preparing yourself for whatever’s going to happen, a gunshot echoes. It pulls your eyes open instantly, lips parting as you realize Abigail’s the one holding the gun and she’d shot Nick -- she’d actually... shot him.

“What the hell did you do!” You cry out, turning to Abigail with wide eyes.

Before she can reply though, Nick’s letting out a cry of pain, and your eyes fall on him once more. He’s screaming out in pain, but no one moves to help him, and then suddenly... it’s like all of his skin bursts’ off of him, shedding completely from his body, until all that’s left is some sort of... monster.

You couldn’t believe your eyes.

It... Nick, turns in the next second, rushing out of the house without so much as batting either of you another glance.

“Oh my god, Nick!”

It’s a cry of happiness, barely hesitating as you rush towards the boy. As soon as you reach him, you’re pulling him for a hug with your good arm, holding onto him tightly as you pant against him.

He tenses under your touch, and when you pull away, you see the look of confusion in his gaze as he stares back at you. At first his gaze is on your face, the blood smearing across your skin, but then his eyes lower to your arm, braced together in a makeshift brace.

“What...”

“Nick,” you call out gently, shaking your head. “Do you remember anything?”

His brows furrow, face twisting as he tries to think back -- tries to force the memories to come back to him. It takes a minute but then suddenly his eyes are widening and he’s turning to look at you with parted lips. “I... I hurt you,” is the first thing he says -- the most important thing. Because truly, it’s the only thing that matters to him as stare at you, the tired look in your eyes, the bruises amongst your body and most importantly the broken arm.

“It’s okay,” you argue, shaking your head. “You weren’t in your right mind.”

Nick just shakes his head, unable to find his words.

True, when everything had first happened, you’d been hurt, felt betrayed and had been so, so angry at Nick. You couldn’t rationally understand why he’d done anything he had -- but then you learned more, and being left with your thoughts allowed you to realize that none of it had really been Nick. He’d been turning into a werewolf, obviously not in his right mind... anything he’d done hadn’t been in his control whatsoever.

“It’s okay, Nick...” You nod at him, smiling gently. “I already forgave.”

“But... look at you,” he breathes, biting his lip.

You just shrug; “I’ll heal.”

He doesn’t move, frozen to the spot -- maybe he’s too scared to reach for you, thinking he’ll hurt you again. Maybe he’s still trying to remember something. Maybe, he’s not in his right mind given that he’d just been a werewolf not a few minutes ago.

Whatever it is, you don’t care.

Reaching forward, you wrap your arm around him once more, pressing your face into the crook of his neck.

“I’m just happy you’re okay.”

And for a minute, he doesn’t move. He’s completely still, scared to touch you. But then, slowly, his arms wrap around your waist -- light at first, but then he tightens his grip, slumping against you.

“I’m so sorry.”

#the quarry #the quarry x reader #the quarry imagine #nick furcillo #nick furcillo x reader #nick furcillo imagine #the quarry nick #nick x reader #nick imagine #evan evagora

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jillianallen14 · 3 years ago

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Spirk fanfic rec

Some amazing Spirk fanfic to bless your dash because I’m falling in love with this shit all over again (this is like the 10th time this has happened lol):

Entering Orbit: Jim escapes to Iowa to avoid the media frenzy following the Narada incident, but a late-night miscommunication results in Spock turning up on his front porch; rated m; 30,957 words

Papers in the Roadside: Non-Starfleet AU. Jim owns a small bar in Chicago, keeps on picking up strays and taking care of everyone no matter how hard it makes his own life. Spock is a journalist writing feature articles for the Chicago Tribune; he depicts the world with uncanny skill, but hides more than one personal drama and is possibly under surveillance from the Vulcan royal family. They meet by accident just before their lives start to spin out of control; rated e; 49,637 words

Take Refuge in What You Know: AU - Kirk has moved into a apartment/house and wants to get to know his neighbors. He meets his neighbor Spock, a loner who suffers from extreme agoraphobia. Kirk thinks he's beautiful enigma; rated e; 120,334 words

Listen, this is not only my favorite Star Trek fic of all time, it’s also one of my favorite fanfics in general. It’s right up there with Text Talk and The Shoebox Project from the HP fandom, which if you’ve read, you know are incredible and frankly life-changing. And this fanfic changed my life. The description the author gives doesn’t do the beauty of this fic justice. I suffer from agoraphobia and Spock’s depiction as an agoraphobic man was probably the most well-researched, sympathetic, empathetic, caring, realistic portrayal of what it’s like to be agoraphobic that I’ve ever witnessed in fiction. It made me cry like a child because I had never felt so seen and understood. This writer is incredible, and this fic is incredible. I can’t recommend it enough. It’s an AU, which I’m usually pretty wary about, but it barely even feels like an AU. It just feels like Jim and Spock. The author’s understanding of both of their characters’ is perfect, like just a spot-on portrayal of who they are. This fic genuinely helped me accept who I am and helped me understand that I am capable of & deserving of love. If you don’t read any other Star Trek fics (and you def should read more Star Trek fics because they’re amazing), then let this one be the one you read. I dare you not to read it three times in a row like I did.

Observations: First Officer Spock comments on life aboard the Enterprise and his service under Captain James T. Kirk; rated m; 500,000+ words.

So the author of this fic actually did a thing where they made this fic into two books (similar to what The Shoebox Project authors did many years ago in the HP fandom). They don’t get any money from people buying the books; the cost is just to go towards producing the books. This fic is the equivalent of two LARGE novels. We’re talking 600 pages & up. It’s a huge fic. Now, that being said, I read it in one day. ONE DAY. It’s that good. This is another one of my all-time favorite fics, though not quite as dear to my heart as the one I listed above. It’s focused on AOS, and tbh, I forget that what happens in this book isn’t actually canon. Like it’s so well-told, it just feels like it’s now part of the timeless story of Kirk & Spock. The “professional” Star Trek writers would never be brave enough to do what this author does with Kirk and Spock, though. This fic will make you angry, will make you laugh, will make you cry. It has such a good grasp on every single character. It also shows the love between the crew of the Enterprise, which is always a treat, and it’s beautifully done in this fic. It has a sorta-enemies-to-lovers arc between Spirk and an enemies-to-close-friends arc between Spock and McCoy that is beautifully done and fleshed out. This fic is definitely a journey to go through, and I can’t recommend it enough. It’s extremely slow burn, and you will want to slap both Kirk and Spock (and McCoy) upside the head at certain points lol.

Of Coffee Beans and Green Tea Leaves: The progression of a relationship, through Coffee Beans and Green Tea Leaves. Basically, it’s an AU where Kirk works at a coffee shop to pay his way through school, and Spock visits often. rated t; 16,429 words

Love, love, love, this fic. It’s cute, it’s in character. They have kind of a rocky start together, so it’s got a little bit of that Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy i-hated-you-but-now-i-love-you-marry-me vibes to it. I’m a sucker for that, if you haven’t figured that out by now lol. It’s really good, and a really enjoyable read. And it’s not too long, if you’re in the mood for something on the shorter end of things.

Please Don’t Touch the Vulcans: The "yes" is out of Jim's mouth before he can think about it. Jim is chipper about having time off for the holidays. He asks everyone if they want to spend time together but sadly, everyone ditches Jim over the holidays because they have plans. McCoy visits his daughter, Nyota visits her family, and everyone splits. Not knowing Spock has feelings for him, Jim doesn't even bother asking if he wants to spend time together figuring he has something to do. Something cute, romantic with the boys spending time with one another and confessions; rated m; 17,690 words

Super cute and has lots of Sarek, which idk about y’all, but I’m always a fan of. Sarek and Jim kind of get to know each other a bit, and it’s cute. Sarek knows about they’re in love before Spock & Kirk know lol. If I remember correctly, there’s also some appearances from everyone’s favorite: Old!Spock! You also get a little bit of jealous and protective Young!Spock. So you’re in for a real treat with this one.

The Ren shat’var Trilogy: A split-second decision changes Jim's life forever, as he enters into a bond with Spock in the face of certain torture. Enemies to the Federation emerge from unlikely places, and the command team must contend with unexpected threats, as well as challenges within their own intense relationship. In this three-part series, the Enterprise races across the galaxy to confront the unknown, and Jim and Spock discover the true significance of their unprecedented connection; rated e; 184,411 words

Textual Attraction: Valentine’s Day does not bring up pleasant memories for Cadet Kirk. But the serendipitous switch-up of his cell phone with a particular Vulcan professor’s will make his day far more interesting –and romantic. Perhaps some new memories can be made! 15,900 words

SO GOOD. Just SO good

Spaceman: Academy AU. Five times Spock realizes he's attracted to a barista at the academy spaceport, and one time he decides to do something about it. rated t; 3728 words

Short, sweet, funny. You’ll love it.

Subtext: Texting your Vulcan first officer in the middle of the night is never a good idea. Especially when you have an obsessive crush on said Vulcan.The holidays are approaching and Jim is left entirely Spockless aboard the Enterprise when his First takes shore leave on New Vulcan. After some midnight pining, Jim sends a text he instantly regrets. That is, until Spock responds and willingly continues their textual communications to an inevitable conclusion; rated t; 13,032 words

Cute, sweet, funny. It’s a texting fic. I think you’ve probably figured out I love those. This one makes me laugh so fucking hard. Like actually laugh-out-loud-omg-did-i-just-snort kind of funny. Spock is great in this one

All Spock Wants For Christmas: While Jim is away on a delegation mission, he panics about what to give Spock for Christmas. With help from Bones and Uhura, and in between some spam texting with Spock, Jim realizes he already has the perfect gift. And all it needs is wrapping paper and a bow; rated t; 11,966 words

And here we have another cute, sweet, funny texting fic. Sue me lol

The Morning After: Jim convinces Spock to take shore leave with him on Risa, hoping the time together will help re-solidify their bond of friendship after some recent tension. Meanwhile, Spock convinces himself he's on Risa for one reason and one reason only, to prevent his wayward captain from getting into trouble. After a passionately illogical night of Romulan Ale and chocolate infused liquor, everything changes when Jim wakes with something other than a hangover filling his head. Something he's sure neither he nor Spock can handle. Because if Jim knows anything for sure, it's that his messed up thoughts belong nowhere near Spock's clean, ordered mind; rated m; 50,381 words

HAHA. This fic fucking cracks me up. You’ve got drunk boys pining over each other & not realizing it. You’ve got accidental marriage. You’ve got bed sharing. It’s great, it’s cute, it’s funny.

Take This Sinking Boat (And Point It Home): In which Spock pines, Jim isn’t stupid (except he kind of is), and Christopher Pike has had enough of this bullshit; 6698 words

Pike is great in this one, and it’s super, super funny.

Extracurricular Activities: Spock returns to the Academy from a tour of duty to find an intriguing cadet captures his attention; rated e; 15,433 words

Veritas: Basically, Kirk and Spock are on trial because the Federation thinks they are emotionally compromised by each other, which is putting the lives of their crew in danger. They have to convince a court they’re not actually in love with each other. They think the claims are bullshit. They think it will be easy to prove that they aren’t in love or emotionally compromised, damn it. It isn’t; rated m; 186,80 words

This one is so, so good. A real gem off of Fanfic.net. I remember it was actually one of the first Spirk fanfics I ever read, and it blew me away. The progression of their relationship is really well-done and interesting. It has star-crossed lovers vibes and has some really emotionally intense moments in it, especially for Spock.

A Habitual Affection: Living in 1930s New York with the Vulcan you're secretly in love with is no simple thing. But Jim never liked anything simple. And then, the big snowstorm hit...; rated t; 7998 words

A beautiful TOS fic about one of the gayest episodes of Star Trek. Love this one.

Atlas: Between what was and what will be stands James Tiberius Kirk, in all his fractured patchwork glory. Because saving the Federation was only the beginning; rated t; 135,529 words

A beaut. Really great characterization, and the progression of Jim and Spock’s relationship is really well-done.

#spirk #spock #kirk #james t kirk #spock/kirk #kirk/spock #star trek #star trek tos #star trek aos #space husbands #spirk fanfic recs #spirk fanfic

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dr-drea · 2 years ago

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My two cents on Robin's LI and Ronance in vol. 2

I'm sure a lot of people have written this somewhere before, but I have a lot of issues with how Robin's 'finding love' storyline was handled in Stranger Things vol.2. and as a talkative lesbian I feel morally obligated to defend this fictional talkative lesbian.

To start with the obvious. Robin's and Steves 'theme' this season was 'finding love' (by that I mean that every character gets a 'theme', an obstacle, to work on in the beginning of the season, which is usually unrelated to the Down Under, but more about their personal relationships with each other; the very first dialogues between Steve and Robin revolve around that). Steve's 'finding love' storyline was well developed during the season, due to his many interactions with Nancy, even though there was no real resolution; Robin's crush however was introduced, then COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN about for like 6 episodes, and then in a very rushed manner brought up again before the season ended.

Now, you might say, while Steve and Nancy are main characters, Vickie is not, so it makes sense that she is such a background character. First of all, Stranger Things introduces new characters all the time (even though they have a tendency to not last very long). And despite of having little screentime, they are usually really 'fleshed out'. Think about Chrissy for example. Vickie was not developed in a good way, which is partly due to the very little moments when she actually gets to talk. She had a 'talking' moment, but at the very end. And when I say it felt rushed, I mean it. She literally blurted out everything at once (yes, they created a cute parallel to Robin here, but still, it is and felt like a technique to speed things up). In comparison to other characters in the series, Vickie just felt so underdeveloped. Like the writers did not really care much about her. Even Suzie had more character-depth to me, which is ridiculous, given the very little amount of screen-time she had. But the scenes she had were meaningful and very much characterizing of Suzie, Dustin and their relationship. So far, Robin and Vickie seem to have the worst-developed relationship in the Stranger Things series. And that is not fair, given that Robin is the only openly queer person so far, which means (especially in the historical context) that she has extra challenges to face when it comes to finding love (e.g. recognizing another person as queer, coming out vs keeping your relationship a secret, homophobia etc.). Instead of giving her considerably less development than other character's relationships, she would even need some more.

You might also argue that Robin's relationship to Vickie is paced rather slowly on purpose, and that there is maybe the plan of developing them further in season 5. But then is my question why Robin's and Steve's topic this season was finding love, when they could have given Robin another one? And why weren't they developed with consistent pacing, so that Vickie would maybe have been brought up in dialogues more? Why was she abandoned for the whole 'middle part' of the season?

And that brings me to the next aspect. In that whole middle part, the Ronance shippers really thought they were winning. Nancy and Robin had the most intense chemistry in vol. 1, but then their interactions in vol. 2 were reduced to very little. I mean, of course we had too much hope for Ronance maybe, but for me personally it was the storyline of 'finding love' that made me believe that Robin was falling for Nancy and therefore forgetting her crush on Vickie. It would have made so much sense, and even 'fixed' the issue of abandoning Vickie. And I WOULD HAVE LOVED IT, because their chemistry is unbeatable. WASTED POTENTIAL right here. Anyway. As they barely interacted in vol. 2 anymore, it felt like they were 'exchanging' Robin's female partner and crush again, without ever building it up or properly explaining it (Idk if that makes sense but it felt like: RobinxVickie is introduced -> actually, nevermind: Ronance, Ronance, Ronance -> oh, you know what, we are going to bring back RobinxVickie for no apparent reason at all for the last ep and forget about Ronance's very existence).

And one last aspect I need to complain about. The Duffer brothers might not know so much about queer media and queer media tropes, but it takes little effort and research to find out that they went for the most basic trope when it comes to telling wlw stories. A girl crushing on another girl who is in love with a boy, result: gay heartbreak. We have seen that so many times before. And (i don't know how to put it otherwise) that's a very 'straight' setup for queer relationships. I still have hope to be happily surprised if they introduce Vicky as bisexual/pansexual, because they are usually erased from media produced for a mainly straight audience, but I don't want to get my hopes up either.

In conclusion, the Duffer brothers really need to learn how to write queer characters and their relationships. And they need to learn to care about them. Because right now it feels like Robin is just thrown in there for reasons of diversity and nothing else. And I hope and believe, that they can do better with writing these characters, looking at how nuanced the other characters are.

#stranger things #robin buckley #vickie stranger things #does she even have a last name??#ronance #nancy wheeler #wlw representation #lesbian #queer representation #queer media tropes #steve harrington

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morifinwes · 4 years ago

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wangxian fic rec list!

aka in which i read fics, write some recs down for aamna and share them!! they're all wangxian fics and uhh @yibobibo i hope you'll like them!!

modern

wolf devours playboy bunny by @greenteafiend (5K, werewolf!lwj, getting together, idk if anyone needs to know that but there's nudity just not uhh explicit)

Lan Zhan has wanted Wei Ying as long as he has known him, and the worst part is that he thinks Wei Ying could want him back.

Too bad he could never in good conscience let himself go there—Wei Ying has a debilitating fear of all things canine, and once a month, Lan Zhan is the exact, precise thing that Wei Ying’s nightmares are made of.

Aka, Lan Zhan is a werewolf.

between the lines by @jywait (19K gaming au!!!, i'm always down for a good gaming au, lwj is the best aksks he's such a good boy)

☆yilingpatriarch☆: pls...give me some face, help me fight these monsters...I'm gonna die

Bluetooth: no.

"You have died." The screen said, and Wei Wuxian threw his hands up in frustration.

resonant frequencies by chinxe (15K, college au, fake dating au, tw mention of cheating but it's brief and no one was cheated on i promise)

In which Wei Wuxian decides that the best way to deal with being in love with Lan Wangji is to pretend to date him for three weeks.

It goes about as well as can be expected.

drift compatible by windoworwhatever (5K, poetry, fluff, drunkji, getting together, college au)

"It was just a fact of life. The sky was blue, university stipends for graduate students working in TA positions barely covered rent, bisexuals cuffed their jeans, Lan Wangji had a massive crush on Wei Wuxian, and spent his time pining and writing research papers about gay subtexts in ancient poetry."

Lan Wangji is in love with Wei Wuxian, and everybody knows, except Wei Wuxian.

the bunny next door by detailsinthefabric (43K, this is mostly fluff and very light angst, and they were neighbors!!!, rabbits!!, aka wangxian's bunny children, this is... so cute i just have to rec it)

Lan Wangji did not know what he was doing. He did not know what he was going to say. He was frozen in place, puzzling over the situation. Maybe he had made the man uncomfortable, which is why he wanted to leave? But his tone had still been so friendly—maybe…

“Would…” he paused, swallowed, forced the last words to come out of his suddenly parched mouth, “would you let me pet him?”

-------------------------------------

Lan Wangji, who doesn't know how to socialize and whose icy demeanor scares everyone away, lets down all his defenses when he meets the bunny next door...oh, and also its owner, Wei Wuxian.

leading tone by silencemostofall (32K, everyone is a music student? or something like that akskk, curse fic, tw panic attacks, tw child abuse, small scene of drunkji, wwx has low self esteem, bro this was so painful to read)

The first time you touch someone you're fated to love, you leave a mark on their skin. If they will love you in return, they'll mark you where you touched them. The deeper the color, the deeper the connection.

Wei Ying has no marks at all.

public places, private thoughts by leahelisabeth (for the love of camelot) ( 8K, cherry magic au, getting together with like... immediate upgrade to fiance status, the author is wrong i crave good wangxian cherry magic aus even tho i haven't even watched cherry magic)

Wei Wuxian had heard the story of course. It had made its rounds through his high school and followed him into his college days. He didn’t think there was any possibility it was true. Virginity was a social construct, invented by creepy old men to exercise dominance over women. The idea that a simple lack of sexual activity before the age of thirty could give one magical powers was absolutely ludicrous.

Wei Wuxian believed this until the morning of his thirtieth birthday.

AKA the Wangxian Cherry Magic AU that absolutely nobody asked for.

i'd be all right (if i could see you) by @thirtysixsavefiles (16K, this was nice, i read this at 6am but it was cute, (while writing this post i must admit i don't remember anything but 6am-me said it's good))

The younger Lan brother is something of an enigma on campus; while Lan Xichen can sometimes be seen in the company of other graduate students or conducting a seminar, Lan Wangji appears to spend all his time in class or in the library. He doesn’t drink. He doesn’t smoke. He doesn’t attend social events. He doesn’t do anything for fun, as far as Wei Wuxian can tell, and it’s driving Wei Wuxian just a little bit up the wall.

Or, Wei Wuxian convinces Lan Wangji to come to a house party, and then they're assigned to the same group project. Wei Wuxian tries his best, but he is not in possession of all the facts.

axe on leg by itszero (4K, i still don't get why wwx did that but it was nice seeing him jealous for once, jealous!wwx, lwj i love you....)

Wei Wuxian pressed his face into his pillow and screamed. He paused to take a few deep breaths, partially hindered by the pillow, and listened to the sounds of Nie Huaisang slurping his iced coffee, from his seat on Wei Wuxian's desk chair.

Having caught his breath, he resumed his screaming and did not stop at the sound of his dorm room door opening.

"What's wrong with him?" He heard his brother, Jiang Cheng, ask.

The slurping stopped. "He's an idiot."

"He's always been an idiot. Why is he bothered about it now?"

"He forced Lan Wangji to go on a date," Nie Huaisang replied, shaking the ice cubes in his drink.

"Okay and…?"

"With someone else." The slurping resumed.

Wei Wuxian, in all his glorious dumbassery, convinces his boyfriend to go on a date with someone else.

these two most powerful by @stiltonbasket (4K, amnesia, wangxian with children!!!, aksksk this was adorable, dadji!!)

When Lan Wangji went to bed last night, he was alone in a tiny guest room with nothing but the howling of the wind in the mountains and his own lonely thoughts for company.

But when he opened his eyes in the morning, Wei Ying was asleep beside him.

(In which Lan Wangji loses twenty years' worth of memories after a night-hunt gone wrong, and his life as a doting father and husband continues without a hitch somehow.)

good things come to those who wait [but i ain't in a patient phase] by @cerlunas (4K, getting together, pining lwj)

Lan Wangji can't take it anymore.

“I love you”, he says, and god, it feels terrifying. “I’ve been in love with you for a long time.”

“Lan Zhan…” Wei Wuxian starts, but Lan Wangji doesn’t want to hear it.

He grabs his cup and drinks everything. He doesn’t know what face Wei Wuxian is making at him right now, and it’s okay.

“Lan Zhan!” Wei Wuxian repeats louder, but it’s too late. He is already falling asleep.

Or, even after 13 years, Lan Wangji is still in love with his best friend. Maybe it's time to open up.

wei ying, will you marry m- oh my god he swallowed the ring! by selene210 (2K, marriage proposals, crack, marriage proposals but.. they go wrong)

“A ring?”

And indeed it was. The ring Lan Wangji was going to propose to Wei Ying with. That the man had now choked on.

“You swallowed it.”

“It was in my soufflé! Why did you put a ring in my soufflé Lan Zhan- oh. oh”

of glittery valentine's cards by @soft-fics (3K, valentine's day, this was adorable aksk, a-yuan best boy!!)

Lan Zhan didn't want to know what his best friend had planned for Valentine's Day; his heart would simply not be able to handle it. When his son tells him that he made Wei Ying a Valentine's Day card, though, Lan Zhan decided to bring it over anyway.

of coffee and white tea by @soft-fics (9K, fluff, lwj doesn't like coffee, wwx buys him coffee, then they switch drinks, again and again and again, the staff ships it lmao, tbh jc shouldn't have done that like wtf)

For the fourth time this week a stranger orders him a cup of coffee. Lan Wangji wonders how exactly to tell this man to stop ordering him coffee he doesn't even like. Turns out, buying the other white tea and switching drinks is not the best way to go about it

canon setting

on the importance of restraint (or lack thereof) by nixthothou (4K, in which sizhui snaps, i love that boy, no like seriously he's the best boy)

Lan Sizhui does not usually find himself in the company of Sect Leader Jiang.

Suffice to say, Lan Sizhui's feelings toward him are conflicted.

lan wangji is wei wuxian's baby by lilycs (3K, i was craving fluff while reading this, lwj my beloved, drunk!lwj)

Lan Wangji gets drunk from barely a cup of alcohol, becoming a whiny baby and asking his husband for cuddles.

one of our own by glitteringmoonlight (8K, wei wuxian & lan sect, 5+1 things, in which they learn to love him, they're all part of the wwx protection squad lead by lwj, wangxian isn't the focus but !!! THIS)

Times change, but some people remain the same.

The Lans are nothing, if not aware of this.

For one of their own, they will stand against the world.

Or, 5 times the Lans defended Wei Wuxian, and the 1 time he was there to see it happen.

so why not crack your skull when the mind swells by @greenteafiend (13K, love curse, post cql canon, curses, getting together, fluff, so much fluff, lwj tries to talk about his emotions!, lwj pov)

Lan Wangji detects the curse trying to curl through his heart meridians like smoke. A love curse, then. It must have been cast remotely somehow to have found him in his bed in Cloud Recesses. No matter. Lan Wangji crushes it easily, enveloping it in his spiritual energy, and then squeezing. Curse averted, Lan Wangji closes his eyes and goes back to sleep. He thinks no more of it.

Two days later, Wei Wuxian arrives in Cloud Recesses.

Or, Wei Wuxian is cursed to feel terrible pain when he and Lan Wangji aren’t touching.

i started from the bottom / now i'm rich by x_los (57K, time travel, fix it, jealous lwj, crack treated serious, god this is so good tho, wwx/wrh & wwx/jgs but like as a joke and it doesn't really happen, but it has its purpose!!)

“First, you get the money. Then you get the power, respect - hos come last.”

Wen Qing traps Wei Wuxian in the Demon Slaughtering Cave, but Wei Wuxian isn’t interested in being the beneficiary of the Wen Remnants’ noble sacrifice. His efforts to free himself accidentally send him back to the beginning of the Sunshot Campaign. Coreless but armed with demonic cultivation, knowledge of the future and his wits, Wei Wuxian takes advantage of this opportunity to come out on top of both the war and its aftermath—before either has a chance to happen—by marrying and swiftly burying the cultivation world’s worst men.

Lan Wangji is confused, hurt, and uncomfortably aroused by Wei Wuxian’s improbably elaborate series of Sect-themed bridal negligees.

lead me on through by mrsronweasley (55K, they're in love your honor, arranged marriage but they don't know to whom, basically wwx & lwj want to practice kissing which then goes beyond kissing but not the whole way y'know, lxc the best wingman tho)

"Who do you think your betrothed is?" Wei Wuxian asks, sprawling out in front of Lan Zhan and enjoying the prim thinning of his lips at the question. He shouldn't be sprawling—they're in the library, for one, and Lan Zhan is studying, for another—but he can't help himself. Wei Wuxian is a sprawler.

"I do not believe this to be of importance," Lan Zhan responds, without turning his gaze away from his book.

"What!" Wei Wuxian sits up. "How can you say that? Of course it's important! This is the person you'll be with for the rest of your life, Lan Zhan."

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bunnykawa · 4 years ago

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hungry (osamu miya x f. reader)

summary: You have a big crush on the handsome owner of an onigiri shop. He thinks it’s annoying. Or does he?

a/n: eh idk what this is. timeskip love haha. but this might be a triggering so please keep that in mind and read the warnings

warnings: 18+, yandere themes, noncon/dubcon/rape, raw sex, kinda public sex?, some degradation, little bit of spanking and hairpulling, abusive language, violence, stalking, mentions of past sexual abuse, you vomit but it's not sexualized it's trauma-induced, timeskip!osamu :)

The energy of the restaurant is oddly calm tonight. Nights are almost never tranquil at Onigiri Miya with the constant parade of people coming in, so you hum in satisfaction when you scan the restaurant and there's barely anyone here. You stare down at your half-eaten onigiri and the loyalty stamp card that you filled up from how often you come here. After nine visits, you get a free onigiri on your tenth one as long as you show them your stamp card.

This is your hundredth visit—you remember because the first time you entered Onigiri Miya was ten stamp cards ago. The staff already know your name, if not by your face and your timid behavior that makes you stutter when ordering the same thing every time they see you. As peculiar as they think you are (for coming to Onigiri Miya at the same time on Fridays and Saturdays for the past six months and sitting alone quietly until they close), they warmly welcome you.

It's only you in the dining area tonight. The few employees that Onigri Miya has must have left earlier than usual. You suddenly tense up in your seat and grip onto your cup of freshly-poured hot tea tightly between tremulous fingers. The familiar male figure, standing at over six feet tall with beautiful broad shoulders, passes by the front counter, disappearing as he makes his way to the back.

After you let out a harsh breath, you adjust your phone from behind your purse on the table. Your phone is propped up behind it, the camera lens slightly peeking over the faux leather. Butterflies form in your stomach when you see that you were still recording and you caught him on camera.

Yes, you go to Onigiri Miya because the food is amazing. Somehow, they make a dish as simple as a rice ball so delectable and appetizing and you adore them because of it. But hyperfixation is a fucking bitch, your thought process is a little flawed, and the real reason why you frequent the establishment is because Osamu Miya is absolutely gorgeous. Every time you see him, you're left wondering what it would be like to run your fingers through his dark hair or how his lips feel pressed against yours. Your thoughts run wild. How does he like his eggs in the morning? What's his family like? Does he sleep on the right side of the bed? Left side? In the middle? Does he have space for you on his bed?

How does it feel to be loved by Osamu Miya?

Every time you visit the restaurant, visibly nervous with anxiety beating in your chest and your throat closing as you try to speak, you feel that you're one step close to finding out. And maybe you did feel it once. Just once. You're unsure if that one special moment you shared with Osamu was genuine from his heart with good intentions, but you would do anything for that feeling to last forever. And if that made your whole being feel as if you were floating, then why wouldn't it be the same for him?

So, that's why you're here. To relive that special moment in the way that you fantasized about—something that can become a fond memory instead of a dream deep inside your head that leaves you yearning for physicality. Desire is the only sensation that you've felt for the past six months and it's torture to watch the man that you've fallen in love with barely acknowledge you as a person even if he's seen your face in his restaurant consistently every week since you first met. Since he saved you.

Six months later. Six months to move on. Six months to get help and yet you're still digging your hands into your panties and biting onto your sheets to gag yourself because of one man after every visit to his restaurant.

"Hey."

Oh, that voice makes your thighs tremble every time you hear it. As stoic and impassive as it is, it's the same voice that gave you solace when you were beaten down in the dark to bleed on concrete. You're gritting your teeth—nearly moaning at the sweet sound—as that voice almost breaks you out of your thoughts. Almost.

"(Y/N), are you okay?" Osamu asks in a deadpan tone from his place behind the counter. You jolt suddenly. For someone who's so obsessive with small details, you sure don't pay much attention to your surroundings. You quickly shake your head when you realize that he's talking to you.

"Y-yes. I'm...I'm fine, O...samu," you squeak in embarrassment. You don't realize it, but you're clutching onto your stamp card with white knuckles. His gray hooded eyes seem to be staring right through you, as if he knows why you're here tonight, what you're looking for. But whatever he does notice, he doesn't mention. His eyes dart down to your purse before he maintains eye contact with you.

He places his hand on the counter to lean on it. The small action makes your mouth dry. He's so fucking beautiful. "It's almost ten-o'clock. I'm gonna close up. You should leave soon."

But you don't want to leave yet. Tonight was supposed to be the night that you finally made your dreams come true. It's only him and you in the restaurant tonight, so it must mean something.

"Where...where's the rest of the c-crew?" you ask shakily. Fuck, get yourself together. You just need an excuse not to leave. And he might know your name, but he doesn't know you. Not yet.

He raises a thick eyebrow at your question before answering, "Left early tonight. Just me taking care of the shop." You should have noticed. This is why you leave your phone recording while you're there—you don't want to miss anything in case you get distracted.

But does he want you to leave? Your heart aches at the thought of him not wanting your presence when you've been craving his for so long. "I see," you mutter awkwardly.

What do I do now?

"You've got a lot of nerve, you know that?" he says after a few seconds of awkward silence. You haven't moved from your seat and neither has Osamu moved from his spot to "close up" as he said he would. You wonder if the door is already locked.

"What do you mean?" Your heart is thumping more now than it has in the past three hours you've been here. Osamu lives in your brain rent-free yet you can barely breathe around him. Now he's speaking to you. Actually speaking to you.

"You know exactly what I mean," he calmly accuses you. The unexpected shift in his tone makes your blood run cold. "Wonder if your phone has run out of storage yet. Funny you go out of your way to come here twice a week just to record me."

"What?!" you cry out, suddenly shooting up from your seat. Your chair skids a few inches across the floor behind you before it tilts and hits the ground with a crash. The quick movement causes the table in front of you to shake and make your phone to fall back as well, the screen smashing against the wood and the camera lens facing up towards the ceiling. You feel like you're about to have a heart attack. Your vision goes blurry from tears suddenly threatening to overflow because were you that obvious?

"I noticed. A long time ago. Remember you from that night back in the alley. Very unique face you got there," Osamu hums. He steps around the counter to make his way towards you. You cower into the wall beside your table, your eyes darting from your phone and Osamu's threatening figure.

Back in the alley. The image of the back alley behind Onigiri Miya flashes in your mind. Dark, wet, and sadly gray. That's where you first met him.

"Didn't expect to see you back here. Thought you might've developed PTSD or something with how you were crying. Now you're stalking me."

"No," you loudly plead, shaking your head side to side, "I don't know what you're talking about!" You're lying straight through your teeth. That's funny—you've been coming to his restaurant for a chance to see him again, but he's coming closer and closer and you're terrified instead of happy. Your knees buckle as you press your back against the wall. You squeeze your eyes shut as the memories come flooding back into your system in vivid detail.

He continues on, "Don't even lie to me. Stalking me like a crazy bitch. I wasn't sure what I should do about you. I felt bad for you and let you continue doing this, even thought about calling the police for a little bit, but…"

Osamu almost never talks to you, maybe a few times where he's handling the register and the orders and he has to talk to you, but he's always in the open kitchen where you can freely admire him when you want to, always an arm's length away. When you would think about what your first conversation together would be like, you always imagined his words to be kind. Sweet. Maybe he'd say he admired you—

"...you're a little fucked up in the head, huh?"

His tone is hostile. There's no love laced in any of the syllables falling from his tongue. He's annoyed. He hates the fact that you want him—it's that obvious but you don't want to believe it, especially when you think you worked so hard. It's not fair.

Your mind is hazy as he's coming closer and closer to your trembling form. You see his lips moving and the calm expression on his face turn into hard evil, but your ears can't decipher what he's saying. His words have faded into white noise. And you've seen him multiple times, traced his face through the screen of your phone, admired him from afar at the same spot in his restaurant for months, but his face is sharper, harsher, and almost unrecognizable. Is this really the man that saved you? Is this really Osamu Miya?

Your blood is pumping loudly in your ears. It's the only sound that you can make out other than your heavy breathing. God, if he gets any closer...

Then, the adrenaline kicks in and you're lunging at him with your arms outstretched towards his large frame. You don't know what you're going to do and sure as hell you're no match for him, but your body is screaming at you. Your senses are running wild, like the aura that Osamu is emitting is lighting you on fire and making you act on primal instinct. It's telling you to fight.

To fight him. To bash your tiny fists against his handsome face because he should have fallen in love with you the moment that you fell in love with him, but he has the audacity to leave you hanging for half a year and call you a stalker.

And it's painful. You're not sure which hurts more, but at this moment, the physical pain is excruciating. You can't breathe anymore, not when his calloused hands (from years of training on the court, which you found out from the internet, and in the kitchen) are wrapped around your throat. You can't think straight either—your head hit the ground a little too hard and the world is spinning. Osamu's face is contorted in anger and even if your world is spinning, his features are as clear as day.

Your memories start crashing down inside your brain in fragments. The pain, frustration, and sadness hit you all at once—it’s nauseating. It’s as if Osamu can sense this, too, because as soon as he notices your sick expression, he flips you over to force you on your knees with one arm around your waist, his hand in your scalp to hold your head in place towards the floor and then you’re heaving and gagging out the rice balls you consumed earlier. Your throat is on fire and you're still coughing up pieces of rice.

“You gross bitch,” he mutters.

You gross bitch.

It's bouncing around in your ear drum until it fades into cotton, a familiar set of words that cut you deep that you were able to pick up on easily among the other curses he's been throwing at you. The same words from six months ago. A trigger? Yeah, that's what the internet calls it. You almost died, or at least that's what it felt like. That's the only way you can describe it, the only way you were able to make sense of what happened, because you feel that you might as well have.

It was from someone else's mouth—a disgusting, grimy man whose face haunted your dreams for months, a man with greasy fingers that put his hands on you, who beat you until you were nearly unconscious with blood dripping down your chin, who ripped you away of your pride and worth until you were nothing. The concrete was wet and cold, scraping against your sensitive skin and breaking through layers as he rutted into you. His breath fucking stunk and for fuck's sake, you don't know if you've seen anyone uglier, but as fucked up as it is, he made you feel ugly.

You thought you saw an angel that day. The backdoor to Onigiri Miya opened up and when you finally opened your eyes and looked up, there he was—with blank gray eyes that stared down at the scene before him in slight disgust, and then he ripped the repulsive body off of your half-naked form. You were too weak.

While you were weak and scared and incoherent, Osamu saw you and didn't hesitate to protect you. At the end of every dream you've had since then, Osamu always came to help you.

And that should've been the end of it. That should've been the last time. You can't go through that again. No, no, no. You don't deserve to go through that again.

You don't deserve it.

You're more responsive and awake once Osamu bends you over the table you were sitting at, then your senses are overloading, telling you to resist, to keep fighting. You're so tired, at this point you're completely heartbroken, but you can't—you can't just give up yet. He's holding you down, restraining your wrists with one hand while his other hand is at your waistband pulling your shorts down your thighs. You're kicking at him with whatever strength you have left even if the taste in your mouth is vile, he's much stronger than you, and your head is pounding from the anxiety. You're grateful that you can even breathe.

But it feels like your body has failed you, once again, and for a second you think that you do deserve it. The adrenaline is almost gone, you can barely lift a finger, you feel like passing out, and—fuck—you're so stupid, so dependent on one person to make you feel high. With Osamu...you don't even know what to think. The image you dreamed of is long gone. It's sad that reality can crash over you so easily and ruin everything.

"Get off of me!" you scream. Over and over again. Until your voice cracks and your throat is on the brink of bleeding, coughing out your poor lungs. Until it's nothing but the essence of your torment. Your cup of tea, now warm, has spilled all over the table and is slowly seeping into your hair as your cheek rubs against the wood. And there's nothing else you can do, because Osamu is still behind you with your hands trapped by his. Your shorts and your panties are around your ankles. His jeans are unbuttoned and it's out.

You don't want to fight anymore, you're fucking terrified. So terrified that you can't bring yourself to move. As soon as you stop fighting, his breathing becomes steady and he's using less force on you. Sobs rack through your body hysterically when you feel it.

It's throbbing against your thigh—warm, leaking precum, long, and thick. The skin-to-skin contact in such an intimate area is making the hairs on the back of your neck rise. That tiny voice inside of your head is telling you to look back at it to see if his dick matches the image you made up in your head. Is it exactly how you pictured it? Is it as pretty?

He's wiping his precum against your tense skin. When you flinch at the tip of his cock rubbing against you, he bites his lip and kneads one of your ass cheeks with his free hand, spreading your holes open and ever so gently brushing his thumb over your pussy.

"You're...wet," he comments. You hear it. He dips his thumb between your folds and swipes it up and down and you hear the squelching of your cunt over your heavy breathing. That's—that's not right. No, you shouldn't be feeling this way. He pushes his thumb deeper into your cunt and slowly pulls it back out. You flinch and arch your back slightly at the sudden sensation, making you push your ass towards him. He lets out a breathy laugh at your reaction.

His thumb disappears for a second but it's instantly replaced with his dick probing at your entrance. With a roll of his hips, he breaks through your squishy flesh with some difficulty.

A loud yelp and a slurry of protests falls from your wet desperate lips. You wriggle your bottom, trying to create space between your two bodies, jerking away from him with whatever strength you have left. However, Osamu keeps going until he's completely bottomed out, filling you up until his tip is flush against your cervix. He lets go of your wrists so he could keep a firm grip on your hips instead. Whenever you moved, it burned.

Stop.

The stretch is unbearable—it's been half a year since you've had someone else inside you. The burn of having your hole forcefully split open wide again against your will has your head going delirious with so many mixed emotions. Fuck's sake, this isn't right and it's been heavily engraved in your brain for months that you have every right to fight back. Although you haven't been thinking straight for a long time, you're still lucid enough for your ears to work and soak up information like a sponge. He's moving, rutting his hips into your hot cunt cruelly. You can still fight him off, maybe you'd win if you tried again.

But this is Osamu. Your heart fucking aches for him and you want to get away, but it's Osamu drilling into your heat and it's just not fair. It's not fair because your body is still responding to his malicious touch. It's not fair because even if it hurts—and fuck, it hurts so damn much—you're involuntarily grinding your ass into him. It's not fucking fair because you can't hate him.

Why is life never fair?

"No," you sob, "No, no, no. It hurts. It hurts. Please stop." Your hot tears are mixing with the puddle of tea that's pooling underneath your cheek and your tongue still tastes foul from your little episode. You’re scared you might start gagging again.

"Stop?" he muses, "Haven't you been loitering in my restaurant because you've been craving my cock? You wanted this for months and the one time I give it to you, you're telling me to stop?" Osamu slams into your poor little cunt despite your pained cries and babbling. Your pussy is clamping around him, your body trying to accommodate his length and girth breaking into you so suddenly.

"Osamu." His name would've tasted so good if the situation was different. Little did you know that you pushed him passed his breaking point a long time ago. But Osamu knew that you were beyond yours ever since he met you. If only you weren't so fucking weird, maybe then he would've pitied you—maybe he would've genuinely felt something for you.

What a shame that you fell in love with a man who wouldn't be able to understand you.

"I'm tired of you coming into my restaurant," he grunts, snapping his hips against yours roughly, "-and treating me like I'm some kind of animal. Do I look like a fucking animal to you?"

You choke, “No. You don’t—that’s not why—please. You don’t understand.”

“Then tell me," he coaxes. But how do you tell him? Are you supposed to be honest? You're afraid that if you are honest, Osamu will treat you just as badly as he is now. It's also hard for you to collect your thoughts and find a sincere explanation that he could listen to—you're too focused on the many sensations pulsing through you. He raises a bulky arm only bring it down instantly to smack your ass with rough hands. The sudden impact forces you forward for a split second. Then he brings his hand down a few more times, until he's satisfied with the dark red hand print with tiny splotches dotted across your skin.

Is this a punishment for everything that you've done within the last six months? Punishment for admiring him through sneaky videos and pictures? Punishment for thinking about him all the time? You feel like a criminal, caught red-handed and forced to go through torture and suffer for your ungodly sins. Each time he hits you, you're twitching from the painful sting and praying for forgiveness.

"Stop it!" you beg through tears, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It hurts so much." Apologies start spilling from your sore throat impulsively.

I'm sorry, Osamu.

Please stop, Osamu.

It really hurts, Osamu.

But nothing that comes out of your mouth convinces him, and after awhile it's more like you're trying to convince yourself more. Suddenly the burning in your sensitive cunt is replaced with the inebriating desire and hunger for more friction between your two bodies and it leaves a shameful tint to bloom over you. You're salivating over his dick—you wanna see it so bad even if you're scared—and the guilt is eating at you on the inside. It feels good, actually enough to have you gripping onto the edge of the table and sucking Osamu into your cunt so that he doesn't pull back too far.

"Don't tell me that it hurts," he groans, "Your pussy is creaming all over me. You can't lie to me anymore."

He's right. You're lying more to yourself than him, though. You don't tell him to stop anymore, settling with swear words and a chorus of Osamu! Osamu! Osamu! It's amazing, intoxicating, and it also makes you feel disgusting. The way his cock fills up your tight pussy perfectly and how his balls are consistently smacking your clit and stimulating it—you're drooling from the pleasure.

"Does it feel good?" he huffs, "Is this what you wanted? To be a cockwhore for me?"

Your body betrays you and you're left moaning and crying at the same time with breathy words that Osamu can't decipher because you're a complete mess, but he swears he can hear you agree without hesitation. "Y-yes, fuck yes! Your cock is s-so amazing," you cry out, "Hurts so good, Osamu!"

It's not enough. Although you're gradually submitting to him, it's still not enough for the sadistic side of him. He wants to hear more of you, to push you until you're braindead and nothing more than a hole to stretch and tear apart just for the hell of it. He leans over you just to grab you by the disheveled hair on your scalp. Another scream leaves you as he pulls you up to be able to growl in your ear.

"Tell me everything, you whore," he breathes, softly yet maliciously. You try to answer him but the angle he has your neck at from the grip on your hair is choking you.

"Why'd you keep coming here? Obsessive little bitch. Why're you still here?" It's like he's laughing in your face even if his voice and expression say otherwise. He's mocking your pain, making you relive your trauma as if it was all a fucking joke. As if you’re incapable of feeling pain.

This isn't even supposed to feel as good as it does, yet it does. The way he calls you an obsessive little bitch has your stomach doing flips and your cheeks to flush even more. Then you're confused. You're enjoying his cock forced inside you and it's damn confusing.

Fuck, it’s enough to further damage your overstimulated psyche and turn you into someone you never thought you would be. An empty shell of the person you used to be because your body doesn’t even fucking feel like your body anymore. Nothing feels real anymore, like you're shifting through universes and living lifetimes but you're stuck in one place at the same time. Why do you always come back here?

You turn your head to the side, enough for you to see his face. His eyebrows are furrowed, probably from concentration on your slick pussy, and then he notices you staring at him. You don't utter another word, you might just choke and spew if you even open your mouth to attempt to (and holy shit, you don't want to embarrass yourself anymore), but your eyes—they answer his question in heavy silence. It’s enough for him to understand and see right through you. Loud and clear although you don't speak.

Because you saved me.

Your eyes roll into the back of your head as you let out another sob, but this cry is full of guilty pleasure instead with barely any tears. It has you nearly passing out and feeling sick to your stomach and just please—make it stop hurting. But it feels so damn good at the same time, to have the tip of his swelling cock kissing your cervix every time he slams into you, grinding his hips against your sweet cunt. Your body contracts violently as you release your liquids all around Osamu's cock, pushing your ass against his pelvis and knocking your empty tea cup and purse off the table. Intitially, the loud crash makes you jolt but it's nothing compared to how your orgasm crashing over you has you screaming and thrashing around pathetically.

You're cumming. You're cumming. You can't believe you're fucking cumming. You've never felt this way before and you always believed that sex was painful but you're still cumming long and hard on Osamu's cock. Your juices are being forced out of you.

And you didn't even want it.

You're embarrassed and oddly satisfied at the same time. Your cum is dribbling down your legs and there's no doubt that it's dripping down Osamu's pelvis and thighs, too. He lets go of your hair and your head drops forward onto the table with a thump. You wince at the contact, but you don't move.

After a few silent minutes (silent other than your audible panting) exhaustion finally hits you, and with a heavy breath you completely collapse against the table. You finally stop your death grip on the sides of the table to let them dangle off the edge. Your scalp is sore, it makes your head pound when you move your head even slightly.

A soft tired gasp escapes your throat in surprise; you feel little pecks going up your back and across your shoulders.

Then there’s feather-light kisses tickling your shoulder that leaves an agitated tingle in your nerves and—why? Why bother being gentle at this point? But the fluttering in your pelvis doesn't stop. He slips out of you just to turn your weak body over so you're laying on your back. You instantly move your eyes further down and—

It's pretty. Prettier than you imagined. His cock is fucking pretty. It's hypnotizing as you scan the vein running underneath the skin and the pink swollen head oozing clear liquid. It's glistening, dripping, with juices.

Holy shit, those are your juices.

It dawns on you that you both connected. Although not in the way that you had hoped, definitely not, but...you connected in the most physically intimate way possible. You felt him, his warmth, his damp skin, everything. Your eyes drift upwards. He's breathing heavily, his chest visibly moving. He has a firm grip on your thighs to keep you in place—you're not going anywhere. You don't want to go anywhere. Examining his face, you can see everything, every single detail. His lips, his lidded eyes, his cute nose, the shape of his face, and—wow—Osamu is pretty. So pretty. He's nearly angelic when you take a closer look. You don’t think you’ve ever been this close to him before.

You hope you're not imagining it, because you see something different behind his blank stare as if he's in as much of an awe as you are while you look up at him lovingly, like he didn't just hurt you. He took you against your will and yet you're staring at him like he just told you that you were his world. Are you a fucking idiot? Are you delusional?

"Do you love me?"

The question leaves him before he realizes his lips are forming the words. Osamu looks down at you, no other emotion laced in any of his handsome features except for distaste and...curiosity? With parted puffy lips and despair etched onto your cheeks, you slowly nod. The glazed look in your eyes draws him closer to your face, scrutinizing every part of your soft skin. He braces his hands on both sides of your trembling form. One part of your cheek is still wet from the tea that spilled earlier and your hair is disgustingly moist from a mixture of sweat and earl grey and you feel anxious again.

"Okay," he says, voice as monotonous and dead as usual, but also worn out and accompanied with heavy breathing. You tense when he leans even closer, but quickly relax when you feel him kiss your forehead. It's a delicate kiss that makes your heart flutter. Then he trails further and connects your lips. It's short, but wet and sweet. He hadn't kissed you on your mouth the whole night, it probably would have been too weird for him to kiss a sad stalker he didn't know, especially when you vomited on his otherwise spotless floor. The taste of him is lingering on your skin—you're almost afraid to lick your lips in case this'll be the last time you ever have his against yours.

He pulls you into his chest. Your heart might just jump out of yours. His cock is brushing against your shuddering core, hard and sticky, but he doesn't enter you. Osamu simply holds you close, one of his hands in your hair and the other flat against your back. You weakly bring your arms up to wrap around his shoulders and dig your face into the crook of his neck.

Then you cry. You let out a harsh breath and let yourself cry again, shoulders violently shaking and your chest tightening uncomfortably, for the thousandth time tonight even if you're tired and yearning for the comfort of your bed. Slowly, wet tears seep into his t-shirt. Osamu smells good—musky, sweaty, like a man. You don't understand what just happened—it brought you back to six months ago yet it feels entirely indifferent. He smells like a man, but he doesn't smell dirty like the last one who destroyed you.

He continues to hold you as you break down. Osamu thinks he understands, but you—you're more confused now more than ever.

2K notes · View notes

shysneeze · 4 years ago

Text

i’m in love with you (george weasley x fem!reader)

I’m in Love With You

Post War George Weasley x Fem!Reader

Request: Okay idk if you’d be up to it but I’m currently obsessed w the song Please Notice by Christian Leave and so I was thinking a George weasley x reader fic inspired by/based off of/same kinda vibe imagine. Do you understand that lol I feel like I said it in a confusing way, crossing my fingers that you’re pickin up what I’m putting down. Lol ily bye. ~ anon

Warning: angsty (but fluff I promise this time), self-doubt etc...

Authors note: this is a cliché, but it’s one you can pry from my cold dead hands

George has never been a huge fan of silence, it’s not something he’s ever been used to, growing up in a house full of the constant noise of familial ruckus, and so weekends without Fred such as this are something that’s always made him feel ever so slightly uneasy, listening only to the repetitive patter of rain on the windows and static whirring of a record he’s gotten too distracted to flip spinning idly in the corner.

The creak of his bedroom door opening is a welcome sound, followed by the gentle shuffle of light footsteps along the corridor before she appears before him, a much healthier and warmer version of herself, nothing like the teary-eyed (Y/N) (Y/L/N) he pulled from his doorstep and out of the rain only ten minutes previous.

“Hey.” She gives a sheepish wave.

Years as best friends should prepare him for the sight of her in his clothes, borrowed jumpers and stolen socks such a pivotal part of their friendship back in Hogwarts that he shouldn’t be startled by how gorgeous she looks in them, but he always is.

“Hey.” He manages a kind smile. “Any warmer?”

The subtle drop of her gaze to the floor warns him that she’s about to tell him a white-lie and his eyes cling to the way her hands still tremble with the cold. Then, just as he’s predicted, she gives him an unconvincing ‘yep’.

It wasn’t how he was expecting his evening to go, he’d already surrender himself to an evening spent on the couch listening to his favourite songs when there was a knock on his door. The time and weather instantly led him to the assumption of bad news, and for all the outlandish theories and anxious assumptions he concocted on his way to the door, none involved his rain-soaked best friend shivering on his door step.

A sputtered apology was all she managed before he pulled her into his flat in a protective panic, fetching her a towel instantly and setting out a change of clothes with no request of an explanation for her visit, promising himself only to ask once he’s sure she doesn’t have hypothermia.

He’s still not one hundred percent on that part, giving her a knowing look as he crosses the space between them to push a cup of warm tea between her frozen fingers. Her shoulders slump in relief at the heat finding her hands, giving him a sheepish, but grateful smile.

“Now I’m warmer.” She assures honestly. “Thank you, Georgie.”

“Figured that might help.” He smiles gently. “Livingroom?”

She nods, mimicking his steps subconsciously as he follows him to from the kitchen to the sofa in the living room, pulling her knees up to her chest and cradling the mug on top of them as he takes a seat on the opposite end of the worn sofa with his legs stretched out across the cushions

She twiddles with the handle of her mug atop her knees, deep in thought as the room falls into silence. Silence with her is the only type George has ever found comforting, the reminder of afternoons spent in the Gryffindor common room, listening only the sound her flipping pages of her book and the crackling of the fire.

“Fred’s out?”

“A ‘couples weekend away’.” George nods. “Him and Angelina are somewhere up north for the anniversary of the first time they ate ice cream together or something daft like that.”

She chuckles softly, her smile summoning one similar to George’s lips. There is always a certain amount of pride in cheering her up, he’s realised, in bringing a smile to cheeks moments ago stained by tears.

“I’m happy for them though.” She adds softly, a sombre sound to her voice that has him on edge. “They’re a cute couple.”

“Insufferable at times.” George says. “But yes, cute.”

She exhales a quiet sigh, dropping her head tiredly to the cushion beside.

“I got stood up… again.”

He drops his shoulder in a display of sympathy, pushing down the initial aggressive protectiveness that dares him to ask for the name and address of the person stupid enough to ever hurt her. It’s clear from the forlorn look in her eyes that she needs someone to listen to her, not to avenge her.

“I’m sorry, (Y/N).” He says. “Whoever they were, they were an idiot.”

“Thanks, Georgie.” She says softly. “I just really needed a friend tonight so thank you.”

He tries to ignore how the word stings, ‘friend’. It’s a sting he’s been trying to ignore for years, it should be second nature by now, but it still stirs that feeling he hates, the one that makes him feel ungrateful, because being her friend should be enough.

He hates that it never has been.

It was what he assumed was a harmless crush at first, back at Hogwarts, one he was sure he would grow out of, no matter how many times Fred tried to tell him otherwise. Much to his dismay, Fred was right, and every year it got harder and harder to ignore, even after school.

By now, the word ‘crush’ doesn’t seem to cut it, too childish to possibly explain the irresistible torture that is his love for (Y/N) (Y/L/N). He’s not sure there is a word to describe such a feeling, the way it fills his heart with warmth but aches at the same time, an ache he’d happily experience forever just to be near her.

Now he pushes that sting deep down where he can barely notice it in order to deal with the issue at hand, the girl sat across from him with sad eyes and fallen smile.

“You can rant to me.” He assures. “I don’t mind.”

She takes a moment to give in to his offer encouraged by the sincerity in his warm brown eyes from across the sofa and the nudge to her feet from his. Biting her lip nervously and with a deep breath, she begins to explain.

“I’m not saying he was the love of my life or anything.” She disclaims. “It was only our second date, but it still hurt when he just... didn’t show up.”

“I can imagine.”

“I was just sat in that restaurant staring at the door waiting for this guy I knew deep down wasn’t going to show.” She explains. “He could have just called; told me he wasn’t interested, and it would have been less embarrassing.”

“Guys are idiots, Love.” George says. “Take it from a professional.”

She rolls her eyes lightly at the comment, ready to scold his self-deprecation when she seems to lose the momentum as quickly as she found it, instead sinking further back against the arm of the sofa with a huffed out breath.

“Is there something about me that people think doesn’t deserve an explanation?” Her voice wobbles. “Aren’t I worth that much?”

His heart breaks into what he’s sure are thousands of little pieces, his breath catching in his throat at the tears that spring to her eyes. He pulls his legs back and shuffles towards her end of the sofa as she hides her face behind her knees.

Gentle tugging the tea from her fingers, he places it on the coffee table before pushing her knees down, guiding her legs across his lap, squeezing her knee to urge her to look up and meet his eyes. She sniffles softly as she lifts her head, gulping at the softness in his warm brown eyes.

“You are worth so much more.” He explains. “I’m so sorry they made you feel like you weren’t.”

“I guess I just feel… unlovable.” She confesses.

Frustration forces itself out of his lungs in a long sigh, startling her slightly. It almost hurts to listen to her talk about herself, ‘unlovable’, as if he isn’t sat in front of her, undoubtedly in love with her. It’s not the first time he’s wished she would notice, where life would be so much easier if she could just look at him and see instantly how in love with her he is.

If only she could see how he blushes when he makes her laugh, how even in crowded rooms, he has only eyes for her and how, sometimes, despite his best efforts, he can’t help but fumble over his words when she talks to him.

“You’re not.” He shakes his head slowly. “Trust me.”

It’s a miniscule confession, one he doubts she’s going to pick up on until he can see something flicker across her eyes, realisation perhaps. It fades as quickly as it appeared, as though in only a millisecond she considered and dismissed the notion.

However, George has taken the first steps down a dangerous path, there is no going back no matter how fast the beating of his nervous heart.

“You’re the amazing, (Y/N).” He continues. “I hate that other people can’t see that, but I do.”

“George-“

“I’m in love with you, (Y/N).”

“George please…” She exhales shakily, desperately. “Please don’t tell me this if you don’t mean it, if you’re just trying to cheer me up- please, George.”

“I do mean it, (Y/N).” He assures frantically. “Merlin, (Y/N), I love everything about you, the way you sing under your breath when you think no one’s listening, how you mimic the facial expressions of the characters in books without even noticing you’re doing it, how you get the hiccups when you laugh too much- blood hell, (Y/N), you’re laugh is the most gorgeous sound in the world.”

He’s in love with every single one of her quirks and habits; the lucky penny she’s taken to every single one of his quidditch matches, the pressed flowers she uses as bookmarks, and her pockets that are always full of plasters and healing cream… He could get carried away with listing them all, he has to restrain himself from doing so, bringing himself back with a sigh.

“I’m in love with you, (Y/N).” He repeats in confirmation. “And I can’t stand to hear you doubt yourself over and over because of some idiots who don’t know how lucky they are to even be considered by you.”

The tears that trickle down her cheeks fill him instantly with panic, sure he’s ruined it all as she wipes frantically at her eyes. The room fills with silence again, though George can only hear the thumping of his own heart in his ears, drowning out the rain and the record still spinning pointlessly in the corner of the room.

He’s done exactly what he was afraid of; he’s let his feeling pull apart the friendship that should have been enough for him. This hurts more than the ache of loving her ever has, the wretched torture of rejection.

“I shouldn’t-“ He mumbles. “I shouldn’t have done that-“

“Do you know how often I have imagined you saying those words to me?”

Her voice is cracked, much how it was when he first opened the door to her this evening, with disbelieving edge to her voice. The pain in his chest untwists itself slowly, replaying the words over and over in his head, until he’s sure he’s imagined it.

“What?”

“I love you, George.” She confesses. “Every disastrous date I’ve ever been on has been in an attempt to pretend I don’t. but I do, I really do.”

“You love me?”

The words feel foreign in his mind, he’s never allowed himself to imagine it before, that she could ever possibly love him back. Yet here she is, sat on his couch and wearing his clothes, tell him that she does.

“Yes, George.” She gasps incredulously. “I do, and only in my daydreams have you ever loved me back.”

Warmth fills him slowly, then rushes in all at once as the words finally sink in and he’s able to convince himself he isn’t stuck in some daydream of his own. His grin spreads slowly up his cheeks, contagious as it is soon mimicked on her own teary cheeks.

“You love me.”

“Yes.” She lets out a breathy laugh.

“Bloody hell.”

Her head tips back in a hysterical burst of laughter.

“You can’t just say ‘Bloody hell’ after I’ve confessed my undying love!”

“You cried when I confessed mine!” He retorts, chest vibrating with a laugh of his own. “This is surreal.”

Laughter fading to a grin, she looks at him with a new found light, a twinkle he’s very quickly added to the never ending list of thing he loves about her.

“I can’t believe you love me.” She says softly.

He does something he’s only ever dreamt of before, reaching out with one hand and cupping her cheek, grazing his thumb gently over the map of stains from what he knows now, were happy tears. He can feel her skin warm beneath his touch and tries his best not to smirk, not wanting to ruin the moment.

“This can’t be real.” He whispers.

“I know.” She smiles softly in agreement. “It’s all too perfect.”

“Is it immoral for me to kiss you after you’ve just been stood up?”

She snorts quietly at the question, shaking her head in reassurance and curling her finger around a handful of his jumper, pulling him closer.

“I think I was meant to be stood up.” She admits. “As cliché as it might sound, it led me here.”

“You’re right.” He mumbles, lips inches from hers. “That is very soppy.”

“Oh, shut up and kiss me.”

He’s tugged into her lips in less than a second. It’s better than he’s ever allowed himself to imagine during those lonely evenings spent staring at his ceiling, it’s everything to him. She moves her lips with his eagerly, as if she would be happy to the spend the rest of her life with him in this moment.

She’s perfect, it’s a fact he’s known since they were seventeen, but never has it been more true than this moment, tangled together in a kiss they’ve both been longing for in secret for far too long. All this time he’s not been the only one with what felt like an unattainable crush, no the only one suffering the ache of a heart in love.

“You’re amazing.” He exhales against her lips, eliciting one of those gorgeous laughs. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Georgie.”

“I’d listen to you say that all day.”

“Who’s the soppy one now?”

“Hm, just don’t tell Fred.”

authors note; v v rushed, if i didnt put it out though, I would spend all week on it and I have a mountain of uni work to do so meh, also drinking game: drink every time unless ur underage pls they confess their love... can you tell i’m super impressed by myself this time?

#george weasley x reader #george weasley imagine #george x reader #george imagine #fred and george #george weasley

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mrs-takami-keigo · 4 years ago

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Idk if you do nsfw but... Hawks masturbating while thinking of his crush and moaning their name, then their crush walks in on them and they have sexxy timee

NSFW is my middle name~ Especially when it comes to my bird husband. I also made this a non-binary reader and this was my first time doing that, I hope you like it and it’s not horrible!

I’m slowly going through all my requests, I’m sorry it’s taking so long. My job has me working INSANE hours but I'm tryna get back into the swing of things. I have three days off this week so I’m hoping I can get more requests done, also I am working on Something to Somebody part 3. So maybe that will come out too!!

Parings Hawks X Non-Binary! Reader

Rating:Explicit!!! 18+

Permanent tag list: @gr0vndz3ro @katsukikitten @prismaroyal @hawks-senseis @kingtamakimurder

You stood at the door in utter and complete shock. Your boss, Hawks, had his pants open, head resting on the back of the small couch in his office while his wings were stretched out behind him. Cock in his hand, slowly moving his hand up and down the hardened shaft. Small whimpers fell from his lips before he bit them as he moaned your name.

You felt your stomach drop, but in a good way. Just the sight of him, cheeks flushed, lips red from him biting them, eyes closed as he continued to say your name under his breath like a mantra, had you more turned on than you have been in your entire life. You always had a crush on Hawks but never thought that he might reciprocate them.

Gently, you placed the two bags of food you picked up for dinner in your hands on the floor. Tip-toeing towards the back of the couch, you were amazed at how you were able to get this close without his heightened senses detecting you entering the office. Hawks was so lost in him imagining your lips around him bringing him to new heights, that he had never heard you open the door.

Finally, you were behind him, his soft moans and whimpers sounded even more beautiful when you got closer. Taking both your pointer fingers you ran them through his feathers, your lips next to his ear.

“Do you need any help there, birdman?”

Golden eyes snapped open as a soft gasp filled the air. Hawks stopped his movements, he hurried to try and cover himself up.

“Tsk Tsk, no point in trying to hide it. You obviously wanted to get caught, touching yourself like that in the middle of your office.” Reaching over him, you grabbed his hands, moving and pinning them to his sides. You could see his chest moving with each deep breath he took, his breath shaky.

“Are you this hard because you thought of me?” His cock laid against his stomach, hard as a rock. You could see a small amount of pre-cum spill out as it twitched, it made your mouth water.

Hawks could only moan in acknowledgment, afraid that this was just a dream, and if he spoke he’d wake up. “Were you thinking of me touching you, that my hands gripping your dick instead of your own?” You spoke through your teeth as you said that, soft lips brushing against his now red ear, his cheeks just as red.

Keeping your eyes on his cock, you watched as it twitched against him again. “I see someone is getting more excited.” You pushed away from him as you stalked around the couch. Hawks kept his eyes on you, watching as you unbuttoned your pants.

Once in front of the hero, you shimmed out of the clothing on your lower half, pulling your underwear down with it. You’ve never been this exposed in front of Hawks, but the look in his eyes made you feel loved and desired. His eyes were dark with lust but full of so much love, even when he grabbed you by the waist to bring you closer to him, his eyes never left your own.

“You have no idea how much I crave you. How fucking crazy you drive me, each and every day.” Hawks was still sitting on the couch as he ran a hand over your chest, watching as you took in a shuddered breath when he got close to your sex. Guiding you, Hawks dragged you closer to him, your thighs on either side of his own, straddling him. You could feel his hands run all over your body, exploring you. Your own hands found purchase in his blonde locks, gently gripping it when his hands ran over your bare ass.

“As much as I would love to tease you, I don’t think I can hold myself back any longer baby.” He moved his hips against you, making his cock rub against you, showing you just how bad he needed you.

You moaned as he rubbed against your quivering hole, each move made you feral with desire for the man under you. Reaching around your body you took hold of his throbbing cock, a small hiss came from Hawks his eyes rolling in the back of his head. Taking a deep breath you guided him to your awaiting entrance, watching his face as he slowly slid into you.

“Fuck….” Hawks said with a long sigh as every inch of him was being surrounded by your tight walls. His hands on your hips tightened, his nails leaving marks on your delicate skin.

The only word for you to describe what it felt like to have Hawks feeling filling you was divine. One of your hands laid flat against his chest while the other gripped the back of the couch. The sound of your soft moan and Hawks ragged breathing were the only sounds you could hear in the large office. You sat still, eyes closed as your body was adjusting to his size.

You felt a soft hand cup your cheek, a thumb gently swiped across your parted lips. Opening your eyes, you looked down at the man below you, you felt the little air that was in your lungs escape. He looked even more beautiful now than he ever had. Soft blond locks fell in front of those serene golden eyes that were peaking through the fallen fringe to look at you. Cheeks red and a small glimmer of sweat glistened on his forehead. The late summer sunset shone through the windows, silhouetting those stunning vermillion wings that were slightly stretched out.

“Whenever you are ready, love bird.” His voice was soft, nothing but love and affection dripped from the words he spoke.

Slowly you lifted your hips slightly, the feeling of him sliding out of you and then sliding back in caused you to moan only this time a little louder. You did that a couple of times as your body started to get accustomed to the beautiful love you and Hawks were making.

“God you feel so fucking good.” Hawks started to move his hips against you, meeting your thrust which sent a new wave of pleasure to course through your body. “That's right baby, I wanna hear you. I wanna know how good this makes you feel.”

With each thrust your moans became louder and louder, Hawks’ praises and thrusts were becoming too much for you to handle and he knew. Wrapping his arm around your waist Hawks lifted himself from the couch, placing your back against the seat cushions while he remained on top of you, your legs were moved to go over his shoulders, his cock still inside.

Hawks pulled his hips away from you, then snapping them forward. With this new position, Hawks was able to go deeper inside of you, hitting that soft sweet spot that made your toes curl.

“Do that again, please.” Your arms were above your head, trying to find the arm of the couch to hold on to as Hawks brought you to cloud nine.

“Anything for you love bird.” And just like that he had you gasping, gripping the couch with your nails, eyes rolling into the back for your head as he continuously hit that same spot over and over again.

“Fuck Hawks.” The only things that popped up in your head was his name and a whole string of profanities.

“Keigo….call me Keigo.” He had placed a hand around the lower part of your neck, slightly applying pressure.

“Keep going just like that Keigo, you’re gonna make me cum.”

Hawks’ pace picked up as he continued his thrusts. You could feel yourself coming close to that blissful release, and you wanted him to cum with you. To reach that same high. Grabbing him by the back of his neck you brought him down to you, your lips barely touching. His movements never stopped as he looked deeply into your eyes.

You could see just how vulnerable he was at this moment, just how much he cares for you. As if you were the most precious person in the world to him. Licking your lips, you lifted your chin, his slightly chapped lips met yours.

Opening your mouth you let your tongue dance with his. You could melt just from his kisses alone, they were a little on the animalistic side yet full still full of passion. His strokes started to become sloppy, signaling that he too was close.

Pulling away from his lips, you kept your hand on the back of his neck, massaging it lovingly, your forehead pressed against his. His hair falling in your face.

“Cum with me Keigo, please.”

“Fuck baby.” You moaned so loud you were positive the people walking on the street could hear you even if you were on the thirtieth floor. Hawks was moaning and grunting on top of you, God were they beautiful moans.

Watching you saw his wings spread open, showing off their length. “Look at me lovebird.” Your eyes met his and with a few more strokes you came for the man with wings that had flown into your heart and he came in you. His wings shivering as he did, his mouth brushed against yours as he tried to catch his breath.

You felt dizzy and hot as you both rode out your orgasm. Hawks pressed butterfly kisses against your lips as both your heart rates calmed down.

When you both felt your breathing come back to normal, Hawks pulled out of you, not before placing kisses all over your face as he continued to whisper sweet nothings against your hot skin.

“Do I smell food, specifically chicken?” Hawks was laying on top of you, his face pressed against the crook of your neck, where he decided would be a good place to leave a fairly large mark.

“You are so freaking annoying.” You shook your head at the blonde. He smiled down at you, before leaning down pressing his lips against yours. You couldn’t help but smile against him, as annoying as he could be, you still loved him.

#ari answers #bnha hawks #hawks smut #takami keigo #Takami Keigo smut #bnha smut #bnha #mha smut #hawks x reader smut #hawks x reader #keigo x reader

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redheadbigshoes · 3 years ago

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Hey! I wanted to ask you what do you think about robin in general/how the duffer brothers handled her ""romantic"" story.

In my opinion

1. She doesn't seem the same character from season 3. Many people on tumblr say that she's coded to be neurodivergent. Idk, I'm not neurodivergent so I can't say if it's true or false. But I didn't like her that much not bc of that but bc she seems a completely different character (at least to me) and I was expecting s3 robin.

2. I didn't like Vickie at all. And she had a relationship with a jock that was from the crew of the psycho bullies. And like she was shopping at the war zone (or however that shop was called) to hunt an high schooler, so I think she has something in common with him. I couldn't care less about her. In the last episode I hated how she reunited with robin. I thought that robin was going to have a crush on the cute black girl that gave them things to do to help. I would have preferred a new character to fall in love with, and hopefully to know better the next season. Vickie just complained that she dumped her jock bully bf and then talked awkwardly about the sandwich she made. Like, I know that was supposed to mirror robin gay panicking and we should feels sympathy, but I hated it. I want a nuanced queer romance, like all of the straight couples. But yeah, the duffers also did will so dirty, so I have no expectations.

Btw I was also disappointed by the whole finale, but that's another rambling

I do think she has anxiety, I just don’t know if that classifies as being neurodivergent. I did feel like she appeared way more in season 3, and her personality felt more “light” I guess compared to her on season 4.

I didn’t have anything against Vickie until that scene with her boyfriend. She really seemed like she liked Robin in a romantic way and it’s kinda confirmed that after she catches Robin looking at her at the store. Her character it’s just a shame, she barely appears in the entire season.

And yeah! I really thought Robin was going to have something with that girl. If Vickie liked Robin in a more than friends way, it was a weird thing talking about her bf/ex bf to Robin.

Will’s arc infuriated me even more. He was just used for Mike and El’s relationship. I cried seeing that scene in the van between him and Mike.

From the way the duffers were talking about the finale I thought it would be a way more sad ending. I was expecting one of the main characters to die. This season felt like a part 1 of season 5, you know? The other seasons didn’t give the same vibes. Like, season one is focused on getting Will back and introducing El, season 2 focuses more on El finding her sister and all of that, season 3 focuses on the Russians and the weird things happening with Billy and other people, but season 4 and 5 (as it seems) will both focus on Vecna/One. I think it will be too repetitive.

#stephanie answers #anon #stranger things spoilers #long post #not lgbt related

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hiddennerdworld · 3 years ago

Text

When You’re Close to Me w/ Katsuki Bakugou

Warnings: some tears from characters, but still just a bunch of fluff

A/N: I love this song so much. (Go listen to it now). I feel like I didn’t do it justice but whatever. This has been in my drafts forever. Idk how it turned out but here we go. Also ik it’s kinda long, don’t come after me lmao

Are you here with me? Just looking out on the day of another dream

Bakugou just started to stir awake, the sun slowly starting to beam in the window. His blurry vision came to focus on the digital clock next to him that said 5:45 AM. He sighed and flopped his spiky head back onto his pillow. He opened his eyes again slightly as he turned to face his partner next to him. God, he still can’t believe how lucky he is. Every morning he gets a little wave of relief when he sees you by his side. He’s got a little smile on his face as he holds back from just cupping your cheek and pecking you on the forehead to tell you how much he loves you. But he thinks you’re so cute and peaceful when you sleep and knows you need rest otherwise you’ll be a little brat. Instead he wraps his arm around you, closes his eyes, and hopes he falls back asleep as his mind still focuses on you.

Well, you can’t get what you want, but you can get me. So let’s set out to sea.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry, baby. I couldn’t get out of it. They needed all the help they could get.” Bakugou pleaded to you while holding your hands in his. It was your 3 year anniversary and he had to cancel your plans for the evening due to a villain attack downtown.

You sniffled and looked towards the ground, limply holding his hands back. “I understand. I knew what this was going to be like, being with a hero. It’s just hard sometimes you know? I miss the days where we would spend all day together. We would go to class together, eat lunch together, visit each other’s dorms whenever we wanted. I miss you, Katsuki.”

He pulled you into a hug where he ran his hand through your hair as you buried your face into his chest. “I know. I miss you so much. Being a hero is amazing, but it’s damn exhausting, especially not having you there with me. I love you, Y/N.” He said softly as he kissed the top of your head and then rested his chin on it.

“I love you too, ‘Suki. We’ll figure things out.”

“Of course, we will. We always do. You and I are a pretty kickass team if I do say so myself.”

“Huh, you really think so?” You looked up to meet his gaze. He just nodded and hummed in reply. “Well, I do too.” You then pulled him into a sweet kiss. Something you guys had done a thousand times, but it still brought butterflies to your stomach every time. You guys remained in each other’s arms for a bit longer, just swaying slightly despite the quiet.

“You know, I may have a way to bring back the old days.” Bakugou said breaking the silence.

You looked up at him. “Oh yea? Do tell, pretty boy.”

“Well..” he cleared his throat and continued in a low tone, “I was thinking maybe we could move in together. Like when we lived in the dorms, but with no Aizawa on our backs. It’s not perfect but at least I’ll get to see my beautiful idiot more often” You thought for a few seconds just staring into space. “Nevermind, it was stu-“.

“It’s perfect.” You kissed him again. “I would love that, babe.”

“Tch- well yea, of course you would it was a great idea.” He said with a shit-eating grin on his face after getting an ego boost from you agreeing with him. You just rolled your eyes back. “I would too, though.”

Cause you are my medicine when you’re close to me. When you’re close to me

Katsuki had no idea where he was. He was lying down on a bed, staring at the stark white ceiling as his vision began to clear. When he finally regained consciousness, he jolted up realizing he didn’t know was was going on. Then, you got up from your chair that was beside him in order to calm him down. He suddenly felt a sharp pain on his side. He winced and quickly put his hand on the wound.

“Oof, honey. I was trying to prevent you from doing that. Are you okay?” You said as you softly rubbed his arm.

He listened and lied back facing toward you this time. In a low, gruff voice he responded, “Yeah, I’m fine. Where the hell are we?”

“We’re in Recovery Girl’s office. After training today you ended up getting pretty beat up and passing out.”

It was all coming back to him. It was him versus Deku. One of their last days at UA and everyone was going all out. The two were moving quickly, jumping around each other trying to dodge and land hits. Eventually they started to wear down, but you know them, they will never stop. So after a while, Midoriya was able to use a little more than 10% of One for All, causing Bakugou to crash into a wall and fall to the ground. It wasn’t over yet though. He stumbled back up while doing his signature yelling. He was setting off explosions to fly up to his opponent and land a huge hit, but midway he just passed out and ended up falling on the concrete.

“Oh, yea I remember now. THAT FUCKING DEKU!! I’M GONNA MAKE HIM PAY!!” He yelled while trying to get out of bed. You then had to get up and set him back down.

“No, no, no. Katsuki, you can’t do anything right now. You need to just relax.” You said softly while pushing him back down by his shoulders.

“But I can’t lose to him! No fucking way!” He was still attempting to get up.

“You have to let it go, Suki.” You sat back down next to him and held his hands in yours. “I understand you wanting to get even, but you can’t right now. You’ve already gone way too far today.” You take a deep breath and continue, “You’ve been worrying me. Recently you’ve exhausted yourself so many times just in training alone. I get we’re close to graduating, but you need to relax, take it easy. Exerting so much energy in an emergency, I understand, but you’re just fighting ‘stupid’ Deku. You’re not going to be doing much hero work if you’re always in the hospital.” You sighed and put your head down, “I’m sorry, Suki. I just hate seeing you hurt.”

He knew what you meant. A couple months ago you were also injured badly and had to stay in the hospital for a few days after fighting a tough villain during your internship. He could barely take it. He couldn’t do anything except be by your side. All he wanted was to see you back to being the badass you usually are.

He sat up and rubbed his thumbs on your knuckles as you continued to hold hands. “Don’t worry about me, dumbass,” he said at almost a whisper, showing how ‘dumbass’ is just his way of saying he loves you. “I can take care of myself just fine…. But as much as I hate to admit it, I know you’re right.” He said with a smug grin which didn’t go away after you hit his shoulder. “Jeez, babe I’m just kidding. Point is you’re right. I can’t just go in ready to kill some people. I need to be smart about it. I need to be able to prove myself.”

“But you already have proven yourself. In more ways than one. You can show how great you are using methods that aren’t beating the shit out of Izuku, you know?”

“But those ways aren’t as fun.” You ended up slapping him on the shoulder again as he almost died laughing.

“Can you just promise me that you won’t end up in the nurses office again?”

“Alright, I’ll try my best.” He pulled you over and gave you a kiss on the forehead, “Thanks for putting up with me. I love you.”

“I love you too, even though you give me migraines.”

And surprisingly Bakugou kept up his promise, saving himself a whole lot of pain and saving yourself a whole lot of stress.

Just looking out for the day when you’re close to me.

The heat was rising as the your second year of UA was coming to a close. For the last half of the year Bakugou was slowly accepting his feelings for you and couldn’t hold back any longer. Somehow he tolerated you more than all the other extras. Hell, he even liked spending time with you and would go out of his way to do so. He didn’t want to spend the summer without you, but he didn’t know how to approach the situation. He couldn’t risk looking soft, but then again he “doesn’t care” what other extras think. It was a position he’d never been in before and he didn’t know how to handle it.

You were in the same boat. You may have had crushes before, but not like this, and definitely not like Bakugou. It didn’t take much to notice that he was somewhat nicer to you. He did schoolwork with you and didn’t smack you upside the head. He started choosing you as his partner more often in training. And never exploded when he got he annoyed with you. Maybe he was just nice to you because you were nice to him? You didn’t want to take things the wrong way and upset him. He was so predictably unpredictable. A literal ticking bomb, but somehow he was a lovable one.

The two of you were becoming unbearable. Your friends had all been planning to get together before summer break anyway, so they decided to do some meddling.

You had just joined the Bakusquad in the common room waiting to have some fun. You and Bakugou were sitting next to each other on the couch while Sero, Kaminari, and Kirishima all were chilling on the floor around the coffee table. Meanwhile, Mina was nowhere to be found.

“Ugh! Where the hell is stupid Pinkie?! I wanna get this shit over with?”

“We love you too, Kacchan.” Kaminari replies and you can head Bakugou growl next to you and you try not to laugh. “I’m sure she’ll be here any sec. She had to grab something for the super special thing she planned.” He said while wiggling his eyebrows and Bakugou just rolled his eyes. Kirishima then kicked Kaminari and whisper-yelled “Dude!” Then he turned back to you guys and said with a nervous smile, “What he means is that Mina wanted this to be the perfect hang out before we have to go back home, so she has some stuff for us.”

“I sure do!” Mina yelled as she burst in the room with her arms up.

“tch- finally” Bakugou mumbled under his breath.

“We just gotta set up and then we can do the super special thing. Sero and Kirishima wanna help me grab some stuff from the kitchen? And then the rest of you can you check to make sure we have enough room in my dorm? Great!” She gave no one time to respond and everyone just got up and followed suit.

“Wait can I use the bathroom first?! I totally gotta take a whiz!” Kaminari whined.

“Yea, just hurry up! I wouldn’t want you to miss anything! Y/N and Bakugou we’ll all meet you up there in a sec!”

Sero, Kirishima, and Mina shuffled into the kitchen while Human Pikachu bolted (lol) to the bathroom. You and Bakugou weren’t as frantic as the others but you still went with it.

When you both arrived you found Mina’s room to be totally clean. “OI, PINKIE YOU’RE RO-!” Bakugou was on the way his way out but then you saw a flash of yellow and the door slamming on Bakugou’s face.

“What the-?” Bakugou tried to turned the handle but it didn’t budge. “I SWEAR IF YOUR PLAN WAS TO PRANK US IM GONNA BURN YOUR DUMBASSES ALL TO HELL!! NOW LET US OUT!!” He banged on the door, still attempting to get out, but all he heard back was some snickers and the sound of something being put in front of the door. The Pomeranian, now angered, was still aimlessly attacking the door until he heard you sigh and flop on the bed.

Sprawled out with your hands covering your face you muttered, “Ugh, I’m sorry.”

Bakugou stopped and turned around to face you being the most confused you’ve ever seen him, “Wait... you knew about this!” He started stomping over.

You quickly sat up anticipating something to happen. “No, no I didn’t. I just.. I think I know what this is about. I think this is all because of something I said to Mina.”

You move your eyes around the room afraid to make contact with the ruby eyes of the man standing above you.

“And what’s that?”

You sigh and fidget with your fingers, “Well, I may as well say it because I don’t think we’ll get out of here otherwise. I like you, Bakugou. I have for a bit now and didn’t know what to do. So I asked Mina, and this is definitely not how I wanted to handle it so I’m sorry and-“ you were interrupted by Bakugou tilting your head up which was staring at the floor while you rambled. He quickly leaned down and pressed his lips against yours. You sat there wide-eyed. Not that it wasn’t good (it was), you were just thinking holy shit, my crush is on my face right now.

“Shit, I’m sorry I should’ve asked first. I just wanted to stop you because you don’t need to apologize. And I’m pretty sure you know this now but I like you too I guess. I don’t find you as annoying as I probably should. I haven’t for a while now.” He now was stood back up with a blush spread across his face and his one hand in this pocket with the other one rubbing the back of his neck. You stand up next to him and place your arms on his shoulders.

You giggle and say, “It’s okay. I enjoyed it. I was just surprised because I didn’t expect it from you. I actually think we should do it again.”

“Really?” He looked up as you nodded in response while biting your lip. You both then leaned in and kissed each other once more. It was definitely not as awkward as the first one. The kiss was sweet and passionate. When Bakugou feels something, he feels it wholeheartedly and it was evident in the way he was kissing you. He treated you as if you were an illusion that could shatter at any moment and he wasn’t going to take any of his time with you for granted.

You were suddenly interrupted by a loud banging on the door, “YOU LOVEBIRDS DONE IN THERE YET?!!! I ACTUALLY WANTED TO DO STUFF TONIGHT!!” Mina yelled through the door.

When you’re close to me

Bakugou woke up again but this time due to you booping his nose. “Good morning, Sunshine.” You whispered as you placed a kiss where had previously booped him. He just groaned and looked over to see the clock reading 8:30 AM. When he looked back your head was on his chest while you held onto him. He smiled a bit and pulled you in closer.

“Can we just stay like this all day, babe?” He said with his cheek pressed on the top of your head.

“Did I hear that correctly? Katsuki Bakugou said he wanted to stay in bed?! I must be dreaming still.”

“Tch, you’re such an idiot.” He chuckled and pressed a kiss onto the top of your head. “I love you though, you know that right?”

“Enough to help me make us some breakfast in bed?” You looked up at him with puppy eyes. He just sighed loudly and started to dramatically get out of bed. You soon followed and caught up to give him a hug as he grabbed stuff from the fridge. “I love you too, ‘Suki.”

#katsuki bakugou #bakugou fluff #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x you #bakugou x y/n #mha fluff

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singular-braincells · 4 years ago

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i just wanted to thank all of y'all for nearly 100 followers and i'll probably do something special for it (maybe a Q&A? idk come up with something dw)

school is dumb and i hate it here stressing about college applications is also wack

i've always wanted to try my hand at the fluff alphabet so i hope this isn't too ooc or bad

kageyama tobio A-Z fluff alphabet

[a]ctivities: what do they like to do with their s/o? how do they spend their free time with them?

kageyama would absolutely love love love to play volleyball with you. it doesn't matter if you're a professional or don't know what a recieve is, if you show interest in playing it with him he will be just so over joyed (of course without showing it very much)

his favorite thing to do with you that's not volleyball is going out for hikes or walks in the park. just being able to go outside and enjoy the weather is a good stress reliever for him. you two don't even have to talk very much. if you want to ramble about your day or about the latest tv show you've watched, he's gonna listen but if you want to just be together and walk in silence he's totally down for that too.

[b]eauty: what do they admire about their s/o? what do they think is beautiful about them?

one physical trait kageyama likes is your voice. he would love your voice no matter what. if you're one to talk about anything and everything he is low-key relieved because he cannot carry a conversation for the life of him but if you prefer a comfortable silence he's down for that too.

a personality traits he admires is patience. he knows he isn't the sharpest tool in the shed and isn't one to pick up hints easily. so if you bare with him and help him maneuver through life and its obstacles he will definitely fall harder for you

[c]omfort: how would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

to be honest, I can see Kageyama not knowing what to do the first time his s/o has a panic attack or feels awful. he's just very inexperienced with relationships in general, but he's gonna try to do some research and ask his upper classmen teammates for help. the second time it happens he'll be there for you. he is gonna provide all the physical and emotional support that he can.

[d]reams: how do they picture their future with their s/o?

once he has a stable schedule, kageyama sees the two of you living in a large condo home living the domestic life. making breakfast together on days that the two of you have off, movie nights with popcorn and tea, doing cosmetic face masks together (despite Kageyama having the clearest skin known to mankind), and just being able to take the time to cherish one another.

[e]qual: are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

at the beginning of the relationship Kageyama's gonna be more passive just because he a) doesn't want to accidently hurt you and b) he does not have the slightest clue what to do in a relationship. as the relationship goes on he's gonna be a little bit more dominant, but he will always ask to do something (like ask to give you a hug or for kisses etc. because he is a polite boy 😤)

[f]ight: would they be easy to forgive their s/o?

it honestly depends on what the who's at fault. if you're clearly at fault kageyama is gonna expect you to apologize and own up to it, but if he's the one at fault he will apologize as soon as he realizes it. he doesn't want to lose you in some dumb argument so he'll quickly and sincerely apologize, though it might take just a little bit of time for him to realize.

[g]ratitude: how grateful are they in general? are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

kageyama is super duper duper grateful for all that you do for him. waiting for him to come home at night with late practices, him leaving at dawn for early practice, all of it. he doesn't know how to verbally say "thank you so much for all that you do I don't know where I'd be without you" but he'll show it through actions. he's gonna get you a cute little trinket he sees at the airport when he's away or gets you that thing you've been looking at for some time without you realizing.

[h]onesty: do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? or do they share everything?

Kageyama doesn't share too much, only if you ask. he's not very good at opening up and he's very scared of abandonment. just be patient with him and let him open up at his own pace. he'll tell you everything just not at all once

[i]nspiration: did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? like trying out new things or help them overcome their personal problems?

he's become more aware of how to talk to people and the general aura he gives off. he’s learned to be vulnerable around you, to lean on you, and love you. it scares him that on any day you could pack your bags and leave him, never looking back. he’s scared of making mistakes and ultimately destroying the most wonderful thing that the two of you have so sometimes he overthinks every action. you’ve taught him to go with the flow, that it is okay to mess up. mistakes happen and that is okay. you’ve soothed and ease the insectuities that kageyama has. he can’t thank you with words because he’ll stumble and stutter but he can thank you with a gentle hand squeeze and a hug that conveys “I don’t ever want to let you go”

[j]ealousy: do they get jealous easily? how do they deal with it?

again, baby boy kags has abandonment issues from Junior high so he's gonna be at least a little bit jealous, but not to worry! he trusts you 100 percent to make the right choices and to be loyal. he wouldn't really get that jealous unless someone was blatantly flirting with you. you notice his jealousy when he gives off the iciest glare to whoever is flirting with you. unless you look visibly uncomfortable he won't step in since he knows you can handle yourself. but if you needed him to step in, he would in a heartbeat. he deals with his jealousy by pouting at you and glaring at the other person until you give him all the affection he wants.

[k]iss: are they a good kisser? what was the first kiss like?

there is a 100 percent high chance that Kageyama has never been in a relationship before, let alone kissed someone. he's gonna be very inexperienced so if you take the lead until Kageyama feels more comfortable with it he'll be grateful. but fyi this boy learns and he learns fast don't worry ;)

your first kiss was an accident (i know cliché but hear me out). the two of you were sitting together shoulder to shoulder studying for midterms. you were aiming to give kageyama a kiss on the cheek for getting a question correct on his literature homework, but he moved his head towards you to ask you something about a certain kanji character and bam. that was your first kiss.

[l]ove confession: how would they confess to their s/o?

kageyama would do the cliché "stick a note in your locker asking you to meet after school on the roof top" but would either fuck it up by a) messing up some kanji so it's unreadable and confusing, b) make it sound like a threat, or c) both. how he wrote it is option c.

you ended up going to the rooftop of the school out of curiosity and you see the dark haired boy standing there with a strawberry milk carton, bag of steamed buns, and a single rose (fun fact: the karasuno boys vbc made him get all of those things because let's face it this boy is hopeless with gifts).

as soon as you meet his gaze, his face turns red in record time. he adorably stutters out that he's got the biggest crush on you and you can't help but accept his heartfelt confession.

[m]arriage: do they want to get married? how do they propose? what would the marriage be like?

he would totally want to get married. he'd propose to you at a really really serenic place at night either at like a picnic at the beach or under the night sky on your condo balcony. your wedding would be small private with just your friends and family. the marriage would just be your relationship before y'all got married just now y'all share a bank account.

[n]icknames: what do they call their s/o?

at the beginning of your relationship, he was used to pet names but as he got comfortable in your relationship he uses some of them. the most common ones he uses are things like "honey", "love", and "babe"/"baby"

[o]n cloud nine: what are they like when they are in love? is it obvious for others? how do they express their feelings?

tobio makes it painfully obvious that he has a crush. he's never experienced these feelings before so he doesn't really know how to handle them so it's very obvious to others that he has a crush (even if he doesn't know himself). the longing glances, the flushed cheeks, the spacing out, the stuttering, it's really really obvious to tell if he's infatuated with someone.

he doesn't really express his feelings very well but he does express it by walking you home after school or after his practice, getting you your favorite drink from the vending machine, and just showing he cares in small ways.

[p]da: are they upfront about their relationship? do they brag about their s/o in front of others? or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

kageyama is definitely more reserved when presenting his relationship. he won't go sucking off your face in front of people, but he doesn't mind the small gestures like hand holding and settling his hand on your waist.

when the two of you first got together, he kept it a secret from his team for months until hinata accidently saw the two of you kissing in the closet. it was only then when kageyama decided to announce to the team that the two of you are dating.

[q]uirk: some ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

okay, he is a god at massages and other things with his hands ;))))). so if your back aches from sleeping weird or sitting at a work desk for too long he will gladly give you a quick massage to relieve some of the pain. because of this you learned some massage methods and tricks to help tobio out when he comes from practices sore.

[r]omance: how romantic are they? what would they do to make their s/o happy? cliché or rather creative?

he's not very romantic himself, but he'll do anything he can to make his s/o happy. most of the things he'll do will either be corny and cliché as hell or they'll be super thoughtful and unique. it honestly depends on who he asks for advice (hint: nishinoya and tanaka are cheesy as hell so do what you want with that info)

[s]upport: are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? do they believe in them?

he will support you all the way with your dreams and goals like you've supported him with his professional volleyball dreams. he can't help you much with writing essays or calculating certain equations, but he'll try his best to give you all the emotional support you need to achieve your dreams.

[t]hrill: do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? or do they prefer a certain routine?

i think he'd be more of a routine sort of person, but if you want to do something new he will give it his best shot. he'll do anything to make you happy and who knows, maybe he'll discover something new about himself.

[u]nderstanding: how good do they know their partner? are they empathetic?

when it comes to your niche habits and things you like, he knows them like he knows the back of his hand. y'all saw how fast he memorized those lil volleyball signals, he unconsciously memorized all these small little details about you.

when it comes to being empathetic, he's got the right idea but he's going to come off a little off. the best way to get your feelings across to him is by straight up telling him. he'll learn to notice the small signs you give off when something is off.

[v]alue: how important is the relationship to them? what is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life

he will value your relationship like he values volleyball. he takes most of his relationships seriously so expect him to put the most effort he can. he'd expect you to do the same.

[w]ild card: a random fluff headcannon.

he saw you taking care of your friend's three year old son once. the way you were so doting and motherly towards him made his heart go doki doki. he realizes how much of a good parent you'd make and after that, he sometimes has cute domestic fantasies about having children with you.

[x]oxo: are they very affectionate? do they love to kiss and cuddle?

kageyama is not very affectionate in public, but in private he will be all over you. he's just more comfortable being cutesy and vulnerable in private with you. he will give you cute forehead / head kisses, snuggle you while the two of you sleep, hold your hand while you're doing laundry, and put his chin on your head while you do the dishes. he's just more baby in general when at home away from the public.

[y]earning: how will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

when kageyama misses you he will look at old pictures the two of you have taken together or pictures he has taken of you when you asked him to over the years that you've been together. these get him through some of the more lonelier times when he's away from you due to volleyball competition. he'll hold a pillow trying to pretend it's your warm self, but it doesn't work too well in the end.

[z]eal: are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? if so, what kind?

kageyama is willing to do whatever he can for your relationship. as long as you're his anchor in the storm and treat him with kindness, he's willing to move mountains for you. he just loves you very much and will do any action to prove it to you again and again.

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #x reader #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu kageyama tobio #kageyama tobio #kageyama tobio x reader #haikyuū #haikyuū x reader #tobio kageyama x reader #haikyu kageyama #kageyama tobio headcannons

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ithoughtthiswastwitterbutfr · 4 years ago

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Wanda vision thoughts of episode 6 spoliers ofc

It’s startttttinggg I’m so excited I’ve heard good things.

I love the new into im trying to think of what show it’s related too it’s defiantly familiar.

The way it’s filmed like a show with the talks to the camera is making be very happy.

I LOVE WANDAS SCARLETT WITCH COSTUME. Visions too

“I don’t remember it like that,”

“Probably because you suppressed a lot of the trauma,” Now they’re saying it like it is.

“Mom and Dad have been not fighting just different?” Vision is still on edge as he should be honestly

AWW TOMMY IS A MINI QUICKSLIVER THATS SO CUTE.

Ugh now the sword agents are here with the plane and nasty Hayward.

Hayward is trying to pin the whole thing on Wanda again.

“We can’t outgun her and clearly antagonizing isn’t only making things worse,”

He brought up Monica’s mother then quicked the trio off the mission ig.

They took out the sword agents escorting them.

It’s back to the trick or treating and Peter/Pietro said “Raise hell demon spawn,” I may be reading too deep into this but that made me kind of suspicious.

“Do you remember we were in the orphanage after mom and dad died what was the name of that kid who was always trying to steal your boots. He had the... He had the skin thing?” Wanda to Peter/Pietro

“You’re testing me,” Peter/Pietro

“No I’m not,” Wanda

“Hey it’s cool. I know I look different,”

“Why do you... look different?”

Wanda knows this Pietro is different and doesn’t have the same knowledge as the other one which is why she was testing them she just doesn’t know where this version of him came from she’s still clueless to (the multiverse) that world.

This has to be like Uncle Jesse a bit he keeps calling himself Uncle P

“Say it again now all the candy has dissapeared?” Herb then cuts to all the kids looking down cause their candy is gone.

“And now all the jack-o-lanterns have been smashed?” Product of Quicksilver and the twins they’re using powers very openly this episode.

She just found out Vision wasn’t on duty

“Is there something I can do for you Wanda? Do you want something changed?” Herb

She seems caught off by the question I’m assuming that’s her subconscious trying to make up for the fact that vision lied to her and she wants to fix it.

Now she’s confused again.

He sees this woman who is glitching and crying she is trying to put a ghost decoration up over and over again. The she pain she is in is seeping through and I guess the control over her isn’t allowing her to do anything else but struggle to put up the decorations.

“I’m so hungry I’d eat anything,” Commercial snacked on Yo-Magic the kid is too weak to open it and they died. Yo-magic the snack for survivors. Still trying to figure out this commercial

“I got shot like a chump on the street for no reason and the next thing I know I heard you calling me. I knew you needed me,” Pietro/Peter very suspicious it’s a different multiverse Pietro but he definitely has bad intentions. He also brought up “isn’t that what you wanted?” Hinting to Wanda calling the shots.

Tommy had super speed now great now he’s running everywhere after Wanda told him to take it slow because she can’t control him.

“Do go past Ellis Lane,” I’m assuming that’s where that’s where hex cuts off.

The people near the edge are barely moving because they’re out of Wanda magic reach I think.

Also where’d Wanda get all those kids from there were none before.

Monica and the Jimmy and Darcy trio found out Hayward is tracking vision so now they can find out how sus be really is.

Vision is flying up to see everything and he here’s Halloween phrases and he sees a parked car

Should be Agnes from the trailer.

“ Town square scare. Where is it?” Agnes

“Oh, well the Town square I expect,” Vision

Agnes let out a creepy laugh.

“Took a wrong turn got lost,” there are tears in her eyes.

“In the town you grew up in?”

Vision pulls her out of the control.

“You... you’re one of the avengers youre vision are you here to help us?”

“I am Visuon. I do want to help. What’s an Avenger?” I guess Wanda does have some control over him if she was able to make him forget about everything before hand or maybe because he doesn’t have the mind stone he doesn’t have the memories but Shuri said without the mind stone there were so much vision still there. I’m gonna assume it’s Wanda

“What why don’t you remember?” Agnes “Am I dead?”

“No why would you think that?”

“Cause you are?”

“I am what?”

“Dead,” She confines to shout that she is dead.

She has brought up how no one leaves Wanda won’t even let them think about it. Her witch laugh is definitely a sign on Agatha she’s even wearing a witch costume and Peter Wanda and Vision all have their comic costumes on.

AHHH THATS WHY THEY CANT GO PAST ELLIS LANE BECAUSE THATS WHERE EVERYONE STOPS MOVING. They can’t move and it’s almost like they’re dead. There stuck in a cloud of Wanda grief.

I think Monica‘s powers are coming in because Darcy is talking about how her Energy in her cells on A molecular level is being rewritten and it’s unsafe too go back in the hex. In the comics Monica can turn herself into any form of energy I believe she can turn herself into pure energy.

“It’s changing you,” Darcy to Monica

Monica wants to stop Wanda’s grief.

Darcy is trying to breakthrough the into what Hayward is hiding which is the fact they’re trying to weaponize Vision.

“Where were you hiding all these kids up until now?” Pietro/Peter.

"What?” Wanda

“ I assumd they were all sleeping peacefully in their beds no need to traumatize beyond the occasional Holiday episode cameo, am I right?”

“No I dont-”

“You were always the empathic twin. hey don’t get me wrong you’ve handled the ethical considerations of this scenario as best as you could, families and couples stay together, most personalities aren’t far off from what’s underneath, people got better jobs, better haircuts for sure”

“You don’t think it’s wrong?” Wanda

“What, are you kidding? I am impressed seriously it’s a pretty big leap from giving people nightmares and shooting red wiggly-woos out of your hands” Like in age of ultron reaching into the Avengers biggest fears. On the other hand the phrase wiggly-woos is very cute.

He’s telling her how he can’t talk to her. And she said she doesn’t know how she did it she only remembers feeling completely alone and empty. So she was grieving and depressed. She just saw the gunshot wound and the white eyes on Pietro like she did to Vision with his head crushed earlier on. She’s losing touch to this made up world and is now getting glimpses of reality.

Darcy is almost at my into Hayward’s stuff.

Idk if these names are important but they’re in Hayward’s email so I’m gonna write them down.

James D. Gadd,

James J. Alexander

James X-ND Seckler.

James woo wasn’t listed in his contact either. He’s either been blocked or was never there.

Vision is at the edge of the hex HES breaking through now. He’s halfway out. Now he’s all the way out. The hex is pulling him back in and now he’s falling apart because he’s exciting.

THE BILLY CAN HEAR VISION SCREAMING

Hayward doesn’t want to help Vision so he’s handcuffing Darcy too a car.

Y’all really made Vision die again.

“It’s not like your dead husband can die twice,” Peter/Pietro she flung him backwards at that.

He can also see the soldiers and could hear Hayward. The hex is expanding outward to reach Vision and it swallowed Darcy and many other soldiers turning them into Circus performers and clowns. All the cars and shops it swallows turn into things to fit the aesthetic of her town.

I’m not sure if the hex is still moving outwards she opened her eyes so I think that was a signal that it stopped when her eyes went back from red to normal. Guess I gotta wait till next week.

#wandavision #wandavision spoilers #wanda maximoff #jimmy woo #monica rambeau #darcy WandaVision #Tommy and Billy #Vision #pietro maximoff #quicksilver

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sparrow-flies-south · 5 years ago

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Ten Things [4]

Fandom: Sanders Sides Pairings: Anxceit, Royality Intrulogical Summary: Ten Things I Hate About You AU When Roman Prince learns that Patton Foster isn’t allowed to date until his older brother, Virgil, is, Roman is crushed. Roman’s twin brother Remus, however, comes up with a plan: find someone who is willing to date Virgil. And who better to ask than Janus Verona, who according to rumours is willing to do anything for the right price? Taglist (ask to be added!) @glitchybina @imlikeaghostzombiejesus @someone-idk-is-here @anxiety-ismy-name @ellietempest Warnings: Underage drinking, description of a panic attack, implied references to sexual assault (though it's never outright stated that that's what the character is worrying about) Notes: This is one of the chapters I've been looking forward to writing since I started planning this thing, so I hope you like it!

AO3 Link - Chapter One - Chapter Two - Chapter Three - Chapter Four - Chapter Five - Chapter Six

This was a bad idea.

Scratch that, this was a terrible idea, and Virgil was clearly insane for ever agreeing to it.

They were parked outside Brad’s house, or at least, as close to it as they could get - the street was littered with cars. Virgil’s hands were still clutched tight around the steering wheel, and he was trying to keep his breathing even.

“Virgil?” Patton said. “Are you okay?”

“Fine,” Virgil said.

“Crowds do heighten your anxiety,” Logan observed from the backseat. “Perhaps it would be best if you don’t come with us.”

Virgil shook his head. “I promised Dad I’d keep an eye on you.”

Patton had not asked for permission so much as told Remy that they were going, and they had Virgil with them, and surely Remy trusted Virgil to keep an eye on them. Remy had agreed to let them go with the look of a man who was trying to figure out what the hell had just happened.

“Falsehood,” Logan said. “You promised your father you’d keep an eye on Patton. You are under no such obligations to me.”

Virgil rolled his eyes fondly. Perhaps he didn’t have any official responsibility for Logan, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to look out for him. With how much time Logan and Patton spent together, Logan was practically another brother at this point.

“Let’s just get this over with,” Virgil said, getting out of the car before he could change his mind.

Inside turned out to be just as crowded and loud as Virgil had feared. Teens spilled out of rooms, holding drinks and yelling to be heard over the music that was blaring as if this was a club rather than just a house party. In short, it was Virgil’s idea of hell.

“Oh!” Patton shouted. “There’s Roman.”

Virgil tried to look in the direction Patton had indicated, but it was too crowded to make out who Patton was talking about. People were all around them at this point, boxing them in.

Patton grabbed Logan and made his way through the crowd. Virgil watched them go, unsure if he should follow them. He didn’t like the thought of Patton being off by himself somewhere like this, where anything could happen. But he also didn’t want to ruin Patton’s fun by hanging over his like an embarrassing shadow.

He began to move through the crowd, looking for somewhere he could breathe. Logan was with Patton, and Logan wouldn’t let Patton do anything stupid. Virgil would check in on them every now and again, but otherwise leave them alone.

The crush of bodies was making the air thinner. His fingertips were tingling. He spotted a door that looked like a bathroom, and pushed towards it, barely aware of his surroundings. When he reached it, he nearly fell against it in relief.

He tried the handle. Locked. He’d have to find somewhere else.

He needed to get away from the crowd. He couldn’t breathe, and his head felt like it was going to split in two. Maybe there was another bathroom upstairs. He pushed his way towards the hallway, but people were everywhere, pressing in on him, trapping him.

A hand fell on his shoulder, and Virgil swung around. His shoulder buzzed, as if even his cells were trying to escape the sudden touch.

“You made it,” Janus said, a small smile on his face.

Virgil should say something, had to say something, before Janus thought he was a weirdo, but conversation was well out of the window by now. He just stared, as if that would make the world fit back in place. Janus frowned.

“Are you alright?” he asked.

That was something he could answer. He shook his head, tears blurring his vision.

Janus placed a hand around Virgil’s wrist. “Come on.”

Janus moved through the crowd and Virgil staggered behind him. They moved easier now that Janus was leading him, the difference between wading through a swimming pool and fighting against the current of a stormy sea. Janus’ hand stayed firm on Virgil’s wrist, an anchor, stopping them from getting separated.

Cool air hit Virgil face, and the world opened up around him. They were outside, now. Janus led Virgil to a swing bench, and Virgil collapsed onto it. He pulled his knees up tight to his body and buried his face in them.

Even here, in the open air, he still couldn’t breathe.

“Virgil.” Janus’ voice was quiet but firm. “I need you to breathe with me. Is that okay?”

Virgil nodded.

“Is there a breathing exercise you normally use?”

“Four seven eight,” Virgil mumbled into his jeans.

“Okay. We’re going to breathe in for four, okay?”

Janus quietly counted out each step. He didn’t manage to hold for seven the first two times, but Janus didn’t comment, just adjusted his counting and kept going, quietly telling him he was doing well in between each step.

Slowly, the pain in his chest fell away, replaced by an uncomfortable numbness that made his fingertips buzz, and then that, too, faded.

“Fuck,” Virgil muttered.

He really couldn’t go five minutes without a panic attack. And, as if that wasn’t humiliating enough, he’d really just made the boy he liked take him outside and look after him, like he was some little kid.

“It’s okay,” Janus said.

“It’s not. I can’t believe I did that.”

“Yes, how inconsiderate of you to have a panic attack. I’m sure you just love feeling like you’re dying at the most inconvenient times.”

Virgil slowly uncurled himself. It was surprisingly quiet outside. It made the party feel like it was in another world. Virgil was in a new one now, and he and Janus were the only two people in it.

“I’m okay now,” Virgil said.

“Good.” Janus made no attempt to move.

“So you can go,” Virgil clarified. “Enjoy the party. Hope I didn’t ruin it too badly.”

“Watching a bunch of teenagers get belligerently drunk and make terrible decisions does sound like fun,” Janus mused. “But I think I’d rather stay with you.”

Virgil shook his head. “Why?”

“Again with the cynicism,” Janus sighed. “I thought we’d already covered that I want to spend time with you.”

“Ordinarily, maybe,” Virgil said, though he still wasn’t sure why. “But I’m not exactly fun to be around.”

“On the contrary, I’d say you were far better company than any of the imbeciles in there.” Janus looked Virgil in the eyes. “If you’re trying to get me to leave because you don’t want me around, then I will go. But I have a feeling that’s not the case.”

If Janus left, Virgil would be alone. He’d either have to wait outside like a weirdo, or go back inside and act like he wasn’t completely out of place. He didn’t know which option was worse.

“You can stay,” Virgil grumbled.

Janus tilted his head back so he was looking at the sky. In the light from the house, Virgil could only just make out the raised skin of the scar that covered the left side of his face. “How generous of you,” he remarked with a smile.

“I think you should stop for now,” Logan said.

Roman looked over to see that Patton had gotten hold of yet another drink, and was downing it quickly. What was that, his third? Fourth? Either way Logan was probably right.

“It’s fine, Lo!” Patton said when he came up for air. “I feel fine!”

“You’ll probably feel less fine tomorrow,” Remus remarked. Even he looked concerned, which meant that Logan was definitely right.

Roman took the cup out of Patton’s hands and held it out of his reach. Patton pouted and made grabby hands, but Roman refused to be swayed.

“How about we dance for a bit instead?” Roman offered.

The pout instantly disappeared, replaced by the kind of smile that could blind a guy from ten feet away. “Sure!”

They made their way to the living room, which had been turned into an impromptu dance floor, the furniture pushed against the wall to make more space. Patton held Roman’s hand as they went, and Roman tried his hardest to keep calm. He would not swoon just because he was holding hands with a pretty boy.

They found a slightly less crowded spot, and began moving in time with the music. Roman lifted their still joined hands in the air, and Patton spun underneath them.

Patton stumbled as he finished, almost falling into Roman’s chest. He giggled. “Oopsie.”

Roman smiled, though it seemed that dancing might not be the best activity at present, even if it did keep Patton from drinking. He looked around for Logan and Remus, but they must have stayed in the other room.

He turned back to Patton, about to suggest they get some air, only to find Patton was staring at him intently.

Before he could ask what was wrong, Patton stood on his tip-toes and leaned in to kiss him.

Roman wanted to kiss Patton. He really, really did. But he wasn’t going to have their first kiss when Patton was drunk, when he couldn’t tell if this was what Patton really wanted or just a lack of inhibitions.

He took a step back, and pressed his hand against Patton’s shoulder to stop him from closing the gap.

For a moment, Patton just looked confused, and then realisation and hurt rushed in.

“Oh,” Patton squeaked as he took a step back.

Distantly, Roman was aware that the people around them had stopped dancing and were staring. But all he could focus on was the way Patton looked like Roman had just torn his heart of his chest.

“Patton,” Roman began, unsure what to say.

“I’m sorry,” Patton said, tears filling his eyes.

Roman took a step forwards, reaching out to him, but Patton had already turned away. He plunged into the crowd, pulled away from the current.

Roman could only watch, unsure how things had gone so terrible so fast.

“Way out of his league,” someone said, and Roman glared in the direction it had come from.

A group of girls were huddled together, watching. One of them, at least, had the decency to look guilty.

Roman turned away and pushed through the crowd, leaving them behind. Arguing with them would do nothing except waste time. Right now, all that mattered was finding Patton and making it up to him.

***

“How come you were so good at that?” Virgil asked.

“I’m good at many things,” Janus replied, his lips curving into a smug smile. It would be infuriating, if Virgil didn’t secretly think it was cute. “You’ll have to be more specific.”

Virgil gestured towards himself. “That. Most people take way longer to figure out what’s going on.”

Janus turned away. “Panic attacks are awful, aren’t they?”

Virgil was about to ask what that meant, but Janus cut him off. “I will admit this isn’t going completely how I had planned.”

Virgil snorted. “You mean you didn’t plan on wasting your evening out here?”

“I don’t usually plan first dates with the intention of causing the other person to have a panic attack,” Janus clarified.

Virgil’s mouth went dry. So this was a date? He stared at his feet, humiliation hot against his ribcage. So he’d got his wish, only to ruin it so badly there wasn’t going to be another one. That was some kind of monkeys paw bullshit.

“I suppose you’ll have to choose what we do for the next one. It’s clearly one area I’m not skilled in,” Janus continued, and Virgil’s head shot back up.

“Next one?” Virgil echoed.

“First dates are traditionally followed by a second, yes,” Janus said, as if Virgil was the one not making any sense.

Virgil was about to reply when a figure stumbled out of the house and dropped to the ground. A very familiar figure.

“What the fuck,” Virgil hissed.

Janus’ eyes widened, confusion and hurt flickering across his face, but Virgil was already moving, racing across the lawn to where the figure was sat crumpled on the grass.

“Patton?” Virgil asked.

Patton looked up, tears coating his face. He was hugging his cat cardigan tight to his body. Virgil crouched down in front of him, scanning over him. Not injured, thank God, but what the hell had happened?

“Virgil?” Patton asked, voice breaking. “Can- can we go home now?”

Virgil nodded, anxiety crawling up his chest and blocking his throat. What was wrong with him? And where was Logan?

“Yeah,” he said. “Yeah, Pat. Come on.” He reached out a hand, and helped Patton to his feet. Patton wobbled slightly as he got up, he must be drunk, and Virgil’s mind flashed through a hundred possibilities, each one worse than the last.

Had someone done something to Patton? How was Virgil supposed to ask?

“Is everything alright?” Janus asked, coming over.

Just the sight of someone else, someone who wasn’t panicking, filled Virgil with a sense of relief.

“I- I need to take Patton home,” he said. “But first I need to find Logan. Do you know where he is?”

Patton shook his head. “He was with Remus, I think?”

Remus probably meant Remus Prince, and that just opened up a whole other load of questions.

“Okay,” Virgil said. He’d have to go back inside to look for Logan, but that would mean leaving Patton alone.

“Go,” Janus said quietly. “I’ll look after him.”

Virgil nodded, and squeezed Patton’s arm. “I’ll be right out,” he promised, and headed back into the house.

Inside that crowd pressed upon him immediately, a Virgil felt as if a static cloud was surrounding him, electrifying him. He forced himself to keep moving, keep pushing his way through the room. Why did there have to be so many people? It was just making it harder for him to get back to Patton.

He pushed into the living room, scanning for Logan. Remus Prince seemed like the kind of guy who would be at the centre of attention, but Logan was the complete opposite. Who would win out between them?

A hand grabbed his arm, and a voice shouted “Virgil!”

Virgil spun, and tore his arm away from the boy in front of him, who was dressed in a white t-shirt under a red jacket.

“Have you seen Patton?” the boy shouted. “He ran off- I can’t him.”

Virgil’s hands clenched into fists. There was only one person this boy could be, and it wasn’t someone Virgil wanted to see. “Roman Prince?”

The boy - Roman – nodded.

Virgil put one hand in the centre of the Roman’s chest and shoved, sending him staggering back, almost colliding with a group of dancers.

“I don’t know what you did and you better pray you don’t find out,” Virgil snarled, stalking forwards. Roman’s eyes widened. The dancers had turned to see what was going on, but Virgil didn’t care. There was no room for anything but anger in him now. “Stay the fuck away from my brother.”

He pushed past the stunned Roman, and the crowd parted easily. He left the living room, and entered the dining room, where the crowd became thick like molasses again. Finally, he was able to push his way into the kitchen, where it was easier to breathe.

Logan was stood next to the sink, drink in hand, talking to a boy who was perched on a counter top.

Virgil saw red. He began to march over there to rip Roman away from Logan, until his brain registered that this boy was dressed in a green and black crop top, and was wearing purple eyeshadow. Not Roman. Which meant that this must be Remus.

Remus Prince might not be much better than Roman.

“Hey,” Virgil called as he got near. Logan and Remus both looked over. “I’m taking Patton home.”

Logan frowned, his brow furrowing. “Is he alright?”

Just like that, his anger disappeared, replaced by overwhelming exhaustion. “I don’t know. He came out crying, and I’m pretty sure he’s drunk.”

“Yes, I noticed he was drinking rather quickly.” Logan’s voice sounded even, but Virgil could see the way he tugged at his collar. “I should have tried harder to stop him.”

“Hey, it’s not your fault,” Remus said, nudging Logan. “Pattycake can make his own decisions. Besides, Roman was with him.” He turned to Virgil. “What happened?”

“Why don’t you ask your brother that,” Virgil spat, and Remus reeled back.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“It means Roman did something to my brother!”

Remus shook his head. “Roman would never-.”

“Oh, and I’m supposed to trust you on that?”

“Enough!” Logan snapped, stepping between the two of them. “This isn’t helping. Virgil, did Patton say what happened?”

Virgil shook his head, teeth clamped tight together.

“Then there is no point in speculating. Once we know what really happened, we can figure out what to do about it.”

He was right, and Virgil knew it. He forced himself to let out a deep breath. “Fine,” he muttered.

Logan nodded. “I assume you came to let me know you were leaving?”

“Yeah. Are you coming with us?”

“That would just add an unnecessary detour to your journey. I will find my own way home.”

Virgil shot a suspicious glance at Remus. “Are you sure? I don’t like the idea of you getting a lift with someone else. Maybe I could come back and pick you up?”

“Again, it’s appreciated but unnecessary. I have a standing agreement with my mothers that should it be necessary, they will pick me up from anywhere I require.”

Remus leaned closer to Logan. “I’ll stay with you while you wait,” he offered. “By the way, has anyone ever told you you’re hot when you take charge like that?”

Logan shot him an exasperated look, but didn’t object.

That was something to overthink another time. Virgil gave a quick salute to Logan, and then hurried out of the house.

He froze in place outside of the door, because Janus and Patton were gone. There was no sign of them anywhere in the yard. The panic that flooded through him knocked his breath away, and his hands shook as pulled his phone out to call them. There was text from Patton already there; Virgil must have missed the notification.

This is Janus, it read. Patton and I are going to your car to wait for you.

Relief flooded through him, and Virgil took a shaky breath as he rushed to his car. They were fine. He’d drive Patton home, and then everything would fine. And if it wasn’t fine, then Virgil was going to murder Roman Prince.

Janus and Patton were waiting together, Janus looking rather out of place. Patton was still hugging his chest, but he’d stopped crying at least. Virgil was torn between interrogating him about what had happened right there in the street, and putting him straight to bed to sleep it off.

“Logan’s getting a lift from his mother,” Virgil told Patton. He turned to Janus. “Thank you for staying with him.”

“It was a total inconvenience and I expect to be compensated for every second of it,” Janus replied. His face was perfectly deadpan, but Virgil was pretty sure he was kidding. He held out his hand. “Give me your keys, I’ll drive you back.”

Virgil shook his head. “I’m fine, I didn’t drink anything.”

“You’re shaking,” Janus said, and Virgil lifted one hand to see it tremble. “I’ll drive.”

That would just add another way Virgil was bothering Janus. How long until Janus got fed up with him, and decided he never wanted to see him again?

But what if he did drive, and have a panic attack and not be able to control the car and roll off a cliff or something. Sure, there weren’t any cliffs in the area, but it could still happen-

Okay, yeah, maybe Virgil was panicking.

He handed his keys over, and then went to help Patton into the backseat, before getting in the car himself.

It was weird, sitting in the passenger seat of his own car. Janus pulled away from the curb, and Virgil plugged his address into his phone’s GPS. Once he was done, he twisted in his seat to look at Patton.

“You okay, Pat?”

“Dad’s going to kill me,” Patton replied miserably.

“No he’s not,” Virgil assured him. “Dad’s, like, incapable of staying mad at you. He’ll probably just kill me for not keeping an eye on you.”

“If you’re referring to Patton being drunk,” Janus said, “Then your father doesn’t have to know.”

Virgil shook his head. “We don’t lie to each other,” he said firmly.

“So you tell him everything about your life then?” Janus asked. “What are his thoughts on Mr Williams?”

Virgil glared. Remy knew that he didn’t like his English teacher, but that was it. He wasn’t going to add to his father’s worries. Besides it wasn’t like anything would come of it. Mr Williams could do what he wanted.

“That’s not the same thing,” Virgil snapped.

“Isn’t it?” Janus asked. “So long as Patton is okay, which he will be, what good does telling him do?”

“That’s not the point,” Virgil argued, crossing his arms. “Besides, what if he finds out?”

“While that is a risk,” Janus admitted, “It’s a low one. How would your father find out?”

Virgil shook his head. “Whatever,” he muttered. He glanced back at Patton in the rear-view mirror. “We’ll figure it out tomorrow, okay?”

Patton nodded, though he still looked miserable.

They drove through the twisting streets of the town in silence. Several times, Virgil wanted to speak, but each time the words died before they reached his throat. What was he supposed to say?

“Virgil?” Patton asked after a while.

“Yeah?”

“Why is Janus driving your car?”

Virgil’s cheeks inexplicably heated, and Janus laughed.

“That, Patton, is because I have taken a liking to your dear brother,” Janus said. “And so I would rather he didn’t die in a fiery wreck.”

Patton nodded, looking thoughtful. He leaned closer to Virgil’s seat.

“Virgil?” he whispered, or at least, tried to whisper. He apparently didn’t have much control over his volume, so it was more of a stage whisper.

Virgil glanced at Janus, who just looked amused. “What?” he stage whispered back.

“Is Janus the thing?”

Virgil had to be bright red now. Janus raised an eyebrow. “Thing?” he asked.

“Hey, how about some music,” Virgil said loudly, fiddling with his phone.

Janus shook his head at the music that came out through the speakers. “Why am I not surprised this is what you listen to?”

“Because I have excellent taste, duh.” Virgil said.

“Well, then I suppose I should be flattered that you spent your evening with me.”

“Correction: I have excellent taste in music,” Virgil shot back, and Janus smiled.

Virgil shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “Seriously, though,” he added. “Thanks. For everything you did tonight. It was pretty cool of you.”

Janus just nodded in response, his attention focused on the road, hands tight around the steering wheel. His expression was unreadable. Had Virgil said something wrong? Had Janus just been taking pity on Virgil and was now trying to figure out a way to gently tell him he wasn’t interested?

“Virgil!” Patton shouted from the back. “You should play this with your band!”

Janus’ mouth twitched. At least now he looked amused. “Band?”

“I don’t have a band,” Virgil said quickly. “Not yet, anyway. Maybe one day.”

“Let me guess: you will be the guitar player.”

Virgil nodded. “That and write music. Not that I’m much good at either.”

This wasn’t something he talked to anyone outside of his family about. It was too embarrassing, too easy to make fun of.

But it didn’t feel embarrassing, in the car with Janus.

“What about you?” Virgil said, changing the subject before he could think too hard about what that meant. “Do you play any instruments?”

“Piano and violin when I was a child,” Janus answered. “My parent’s idea. They claimed that it would be useful for my development. The fact that it gave them another two hours each week away from me had nothing to do with it, I’m sure.”

Virgil had never heard anything about Janus’ parents. In fact, it had never really occurred to him that Janus had parents. It felt as if Janus had just appeared at school one day, fully formed and ready to blackmail people.

Virgil knew what shitty parents were like. His birth parents had been great, but he’d spent enough time in the foster system after they’d died to get the full spectrum of shittiness. He wanted to say something, to commiserate, maybe, but Janus cut him off.

“Oh, look,” he said. “I believe this is your street. Which house is yours?”

“The blue one,” Virgil answered, letting the subject drop. “Just park in the driveway.”

Janus pulled in and turned off the engine.

“Thanks,” Virgil said, unbuckling his seat belt. He paused, hand on the door handle. “Wait, how are you going to get home?”

“I left my bike at the party,” Janus said. “I’ll walk back there and get it.”

Virgil shook his head. “No way. I’ll drive you there.”

“Virgil, the whole point of me doing this was so that you wouldn’t have to drive. It’s fine, I can walk.”

“It’s the middle of the night,” Virgil protested.

“This is hardly a dangerous area.”

“Stay here.”

Janus looked incredulously at him, and Virgil felt his cheeks heat as he realised what he’d just said.

“Stay here,” he continued, forcing his voice steady. “I can drive you back tomorrow.”

“Will your father approve of you having a strange boy over?” Janus asked.

“What was that you said about him not having to know everything?”

Still, Janus looked hesitant.

“If you leave, I’ll just worry,” Virgil said, which was perhaps underhand move but it was still true.

“Fine,” Janus said at last.

Satisfied, Virgil got out of the car. He hovered close to Patton as the three of them went up the driveway, ready in case Patton stumbled.

“We’re back,” Virgil shouted as he pushed open the door.

Upstairs, floorboards creaked. Remy must be moving to greet them.

“Were going straight to bed,” Virgil added hurriedly.

“You better not have done anything I wouldn’t do,” Remy called.

Virgil glanced at Janus, standing next to a red-rimmed Patton. “No,” he called, thinking back to the many cautionary tales he’d heard about Remy’s teenage exploits.

“Alright,” Remy called back, and Virgil breathed a sigh of relief.

Upstairs, Virgil pointed Janus in the direction of his bedroom, and then took Patton to his.

Patton dropped down on the bed, looking like he was going to fall asleep right then and there. Virgil shook his head fondly.

“You need to get out of your clothes,” he said.

“Don’t wanna,” Patton mumbled.

Virgil sighed, but didn’t bother to fight. He sat down next to Patton and began to untie his laces.

“Virge?” Patton mumbled.

“Yeah?” Virgil replied, easing the first shoe off Patton’s foot.

“I tried to kiss Roman.”

Virgil’s throat tightened. “What happened?”

Patton flipped onto his stomach, and buried his face in the pillow. “He didn’t want me.”

Virgil sighed, and pushed Patton onto his side. Rejection wasn’t as bad as some of the things Virgil had imagined, but that didn’t mean Roman Prince could hurt his brother and get away with it.

“Want me to kill him for you?” Virgil offered.

Patton shook his head. “I want him to want me back,” he said, voice breaking.

Yeah, Virgil was definitely going to murder Roman Prince. “If he doesn’t want you, that’s his problem, not yours.”

“Feels like it is mine, though.” Patton covered his face with an arm. “Can today just be over?”

“Pretty sure it is by now,” Virgil commented. He rubbed his hand along Patton’s arm. “Go to sleep, Pat.”

“’Kay,” Patton mumbled, and closed his eyes.

Virgil waited a moment longer, but Patton didn’t move. He was either asleep already, or he just didn’t want to talk.

Virgil stroked Patton’s hair, just like he had that first time, only a few weeks after Virgil had joined the family, when he’d crept into Virgil’s bed after a nightmare. Virgil had felt frozen in place as Patton had curled up beside him. He’d never had a brother before. He’d had no idea what to do or say to make it better, and he’d still been terrified that if he didn’t do the right thing, he’d get kicked out.

Seven years later, and he still didn’t know what to do to make everything okay.

“Love you Pat,” he whispered, then crept to his room.

There was nothing more he could do about Patton tonight. He had a whole other problem to deal with.

The other problem was sat on Virgil’s bed, looking at the posters that covered the walls. Virgil quickly grabbed his pyjamas.

“I’m going to get changed,” he explained. “You can take the bed.”

But when he got back, Janus was lying on the floor, his jacket bundled up to use as a pillow.

“I said you could take the bed,” Virgil said.

“It’s your house,” Janus answered.

Virgil should probably try to fight it, but he was far too tired. He crawled into bed and turned out the light.

Sleep never came easily, and someone else in his room only made it worse. After what felt like hours of staring at the ceiling, he rolled onto his side to look at Janus.

Janus didn’t seem to be asleep either, though Virgil couldn’t see his eyes. He was shivering in just his t-shirt, and it couldn’t be comfortable on the floor.

His bed was a double, there was plenty of room. And it was a hell of a lot warmer than the floor.

Was he really going to this?

“It’s a big bed,” Virgil said, and then rolled onto the other side so he didn’t have to look at Janus. Yep, apparently he was doing this.

“I mean, you could stay on one side and I could stay on the other. We wouldn’t even notice the other was there.”

There was silence, and Virgil felt like he was going to combust from the awkwardness. Great, now Janus probably thought he was a weirdo or a pervert or something.

There was the rustling of covers, and Virgil shut his eyes. He hardly dared breathe, but then realised that probably made him look like even more of a creep, so he tried to adjust his breathing. What the hell was a normal amount to breathe?

He felt the mattress dip as Janus got in next to him. He forced himself not to react, as if a cute boy crawling into his bed was something that happened all the time.

The only sound was Janus’ even breathing next to him. Virgil stared at the wall and tried not to think about how close the two of them were to each other.

Yeah, there was no way he getting any sleep tonight.

#sanders sides #sanders sides fanfiction #virgil sanders #janus sanders #deceit sanders #sympathetic deceit #patton sanders #roman sanders #remus sanders #logan sanders #anxceit #royality #my fic #ten things i hate about you

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