#idk how accurate this is for anyone else
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aroace-ed · 5 months ago
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it is painful, sometimes, to love platonically in a way that is so rarely fully reciprocated. i really don't know how to explain the way i feel, but right now, it feels like when you're a child and you have your best friend, and they're the person you will always go to to hang out. the way you'd beg your parents for an extra five minutes to play together with random little secrets and handshakes. how you'd talk about the future and plan out how you both will live together in the same apartment and go to the same school, promising that you'll be together forever. it feels like every friend i've had grew up and found love in romance where i'm still clinging onto the same dream from childhood.
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canarywatcher · 16 days ago
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Tom King's capacity to fundamentally misunderstand female characters, especially when those female characters aren't white and American, will never cease to amaze me
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dreadeves · 14 days ago
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tbh. and i may be getting the timelines a bit messed up. but at one point i decided to decide on a time for firo’s childhood. and as a result i got something like this:
- firo is born c. may 1912 (he is a year and a half away from 20 in like 1930)
- the kids all knew each other in 1919
- firo (so eight or younger) is kidnapped & rescued by keith & the gandor head prior to the gandor head’s death in/before 1920 (the gandor head is dead before claire joins the circus in 1920)
- firo’s mom dies before he’s ten (so 1921-1922 or so at latest)
- firo is thirteen when he’s taken in by the martillos
therefore:
- firo would’ve been incredibly young when he was kidnapped because they presumed he was a young girl. like, eight or so. at the absolute oldest.
- within a year or two of that at the absolute oldest his mother would’ve died and he’d be out on the streets
- within the year of his kidnapping (at his oldest possible age) the gandor head would’ve died and keith taken over
like putting it like this, it’s rather obvious why firo wouldn’t have been taken in by the gandor family (succession issues and having to prove strength), and moreso, it’s soooo obvious why he’d have such horrific intimacy (and moreso issues around male sexuality) in his relationship with ennis.
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chainsawworld · 4 months ago
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Does anyone want to do something gay
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basedonconjecture · 2 months ago
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On the one hand, I don’t subscribe to call out culture or dogpiling or doxxing and believe people on the internet should be allowed to remain anonymous if they want to be.
But, on the other, I think if you’re running an anon hate blog specifically to spew vitriol about fans of a game you apparently hated as well as other fans of your favorite character from said game while writing fanfic about said character/ship and loling at people whom you hate giving you praise unknowingly then you should do so with your full chest. You shouldn’t get to benefit from the community you’re mocking from behind an alt with a default pfp.
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penitenteyeball · 1 month ago
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Dum de dum dum
Gonna add max tags and max characters to each cause who cares
#the limit to the number of characters is 140 and I can’t use the same tag twice so this may take time. also I can’t add commas easily so sor#ry for the run on sentences. I doubt anyone will read all this. it’s gonna take a while to write. maybe I just keyboard smash. but that seem#s unoriginal or cheating. and I also wanna use chat gpt but that feels kinda lame? it’s frowned on so much and I don’t wanna be frowned on a#nd idk. I guess I care about what strangers on the internet care about more than myself. which I shouldn’t. I’ll be better tho. anyway i ams#going to be rambling a bit here. but I don’t care. probably no one will read this anyways. maybe I can try some constrained writing prompts.#what with only 140 characters. people usually write a lot of stuff and better under constraints. cause humans be weird sometimes. why on ear#th did I do this to myself???? maybe I will smash!!! agdkdgakfhs!!!! SHDOAGSKFHSJ!!!! bleaugholofomodowopoidk!!! weeepeedeepeedooooooo!! idk#this is boring. I’m only 8 tags in and I’m tired. who knows why I do these things. the mind is a mysterious place. who knows why we do wha w#e do. …. …. idk man. I was gonna say some more stuff about the mind and how weird it is. but I forgor ): now I feel a bit s#ad. but maybe I will remember before the end of this…. spaces make it easier so#spaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaceeeeeeesssssss. lol#gonna copy paste 138 spaces in a row and copy paste. then add number at end to make each unique… then this would go so fast…. but is#that cheating? I mean I put these rules on myself. only I would really care if I broke them. but it feels wrong to#so maybe I’ll get this done naturally. with a whole bunch’s spaces to replace a comma. it’ll go so much faster. (:#tag 15. halfway there. goin faster than I thought it would. time flies or something ig. I have an idea#imma try to say all the copypastas I kinda know by memory cause who fucking cares: firstly first. I am gonna do the one about the fitnes#“the fitness gram pace test is a multilevel test that involves many things. like running and sit-ups and push ups and jumping jack eh idk#now for rick roll copypasta. not a real rickroll tho cause there is warning so it’s all cool. I think I’ll stop early like line six or I d k#you know the rules and so do I! a full commitment is what I’m looking for. you know the rules and I do too. never goin to give you up or let#you down or dessert you or anything like that. (I’m jokingly doing it wrong. I actually know them alr. cause been roled a bit.) gon stop now#I know just the starting quote kinda of bee movie. but non else. idk what to say. am tired. is late so idk. idk#this post is taking way to long. I’m on like the second day typing it out ):. I don’t know how much more I can take…. but I must per#servere!!! if I add spaces. then it’ll be done. much quicker. (:(:(: plus I can spam emoticons for fun. :3#:3:3:3:3:3:3:3. (:(:(:(: (;(; :/:/. -_- \: 0: [:<. :>]. =). $). ^_^. *_*. (: I love emoticons#~_~. :p :P. :D. d: :b. q: i-i. T-T. T_T. j-j. -w- uwu. owo. ö. ü. :B. :ß. :oo#:O. :1). QwQ. k: 8ooo>. (|). or i guess (:) might be more anatomically accurate. :+|. •_•. .-. ._. :7). :)#27 tag hereeeeee almost donnn eeeeee. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. heheh. fun. not actually to bad. this was kinda nice.#yayayayayya. we about finished. Twas a fun time. idk why i did this. ig it was kinda fun. noiceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee#words words words. just mostly nonsense. fun fun fun. idk idk din. ooooo. wwww. owowow. nyaaaaa. meow#3030303030!!! 30!!!! last one woot woot. fun’s. hope reading was fun. i liked typing it. so long and thanks for all the fish.(:
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mechahero · 2 years ago
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@outofthiisworld asked-🔥 - character designs (like pet peeves in designs? things you like that others don’t? Whatever rustles ur feathers let it rip) unpopular(?) opinions (accepting)
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I kind of don't really like super complicated designs? Yeah, they can be cool and all but if they're kind of hard for me to draw, I'm not exactly going to like them very much. (Yeah, I can always simplify it but my brain's very particular about that kind of thing. See, idk, Gen.shin Imp.act as an example bc hoo boy, I do not like the way a lot of those character designs look.)
Idk, I think I like simplicity but as long as it's not too simple of a design? Like do a little extra something with it while also being easy for me to parse and I'll be pretty much fine with it!
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thatsmistertoyou · 2 years ago
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look I know they just rolled out polls after years of begging but I’m gonna need polls with multiple options asap. ‘check all that apply’ but with nonsense
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serialgirlposter · 2 years ago
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Honestly i'd rlly like to play the new final fantasy but the racist comments of the producer are really putting me of. I wouldn't buy square enix games directly form them in the first place and i know it's like a company wide issue. Idk i wish people would actually talk about this. It's a huge problem in kh as well.
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ravenalla · 9 months ago
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Narilamb gives me the same vibes as Paperhat
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puppys-rhythm-heaven · 2 years ago
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"i think today's a listening to remix 7 on loop kinda day" -me, 2023
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tsams-and-co-memes · 9 months ago
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Not sure what I was expecting, but huh. This was neat, thanks for the tag! :D
New tag game (because I'm feeling a bit better today 😎):
I got this
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Tagging all my moots and followers. To name a few: @mastreworld @asherloki @dangertoozmanykids101 @magic-coffee @rhysaka @aahanna @redfoxwritesstuff @coffee-and-cogs @abby118 @alwida10 @sigridlaufeyson @alexakeyloveloki @supervillainarchaeologist @thelibraryofsylphide @kind-of-crazy-butthatsokay @perpetualwhimsy @decemberpdf @nildespirandum
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angel-sweets666 · 8 months ago
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stuck together
Barbarian bakugo x princess! Reader
Your parents arranged you to the brash and rude prince of the barbarians to save their own skin. CHAPTER TWO HERE
warnings and stuff inside of the story: talks of virginity, talks of a virginity check (its accurate to the time period ok?) a/n should I make this a series? I think it’d be fun but idk ur rich btw so just like there’s rich stuff.
THE FULL VERSION IS OUTTT, truely ask and you shall receive. Anyways this is the full edited and lengthened part one I hope it’s better then the sneak peak I gave you guys
AGED UP
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Mitsuki leaned back, her piercing gaze fixed on your parents. "So, what do you say? You give us your daughter, and we'll form an alliance," she proposed, pausing for their response. "It would offer protection from the Todoroki kingdom Flamoria, no?" The blonde woman smiled at your father, trying to sway him.
Flamoria had a habit of attacking your home kingdom, however in recent years the bakugos have managed to not only defeat the todorokis but make their kingdom subservient to them.
Your mother hesitated. "I mean, I dunno…"
"We'll do it," he interrupted, cutting off your mother.
"Huh?!" Your mother turned to him, shock evident on her face.
"Perfect. Sign here," Mitsuki said smoothly, handing them a piece of paper which already had both mitsuki and masarus names written down. It was a betrothal agreement, arranging the marriage between you and her hot-tempered son, Bakugo.
Your father reached for the pen, the gravity of the situation pressing down on him. "This will secure our safety and ensure a powerful ally," he murmured, almost convincing himself as much as anyone else.
"But our daughter…" your mother started, her voice filled with concern and disbelief. She looked at Mitsuki, then back at your father, torn between the political necessity and the love for her child.
"We don't have a choice," your father replied firmly, signing the paper. "This alliance is crucial for our kingdom's survival. The Empyrean empire is strong.”
Mitsuki's smile widened as she took the signed document. "Excellent. You won't regret this. Bakugo will make a fine husband, many heirs will come from this, she is a virgin right?” The blonde asks “we can get her checked for it, *name* was very sheltered growing up so we can assure you she’s a virgin.” Your father explains, leaning back in his own squeaky wooden chair. His gaze turns to your mother, who seems distraught about marrying off her child to the barbarian prince. Someone famous for being a violent person.
at 17 years old bakugo had brought back the head of a powerful tribe leader and put it on a stick for everyone to see, at 18 years old he had gathered a small army of men and defeated the midoriya kingdom and had a bloody cloak from the one of the dead soilders to prove it. Then at 20 years old bakugo had forced izuku, the Feywood king to surrender his crown. Which put feywood in the empyrean empire. No one knows where izuku midoriya currently is, all the people know is that he was last scene getting dragged by his green locks by bakugo and was never seen again.
Later on
“YOU ARRANGED ME TO WHO!?” You screamed, staring at your parents in complete horror. How could they do this to you? You make one wrong move and your own husband would order your death! “Look it’s not so bad..” “NOT SO BAD? HES KILLED HUNDREDS! THOUSANDS EVEN” “He won’t kill you though!” Your father exclaimed, An attempt to calm you. “Look, bakugo may seem like a man killing war machine of a prince but his parents assured us that he’s very gentle with women.” You scoffed, leaning your weight to one hip “bullshit. He’s gonna kill me. Brutally, he’s gonna hack off my head just you watch”
Over the next few weeks, you tried everything to call off the arrangement. You attempted to run away before the virginity check, faked illness, and came up elaborate excuses. Nothing seemed to work. Your parents were stubborn, insisting that you marry Katsuki Bakugo for the strength of their own kingdom.
Lying in bed, you tossed and turned, unable to escape the looming dread of marrying the great, scary barbarian prince, soon to be barbarian king. What if he rips your head off just because you refuse to give him a kiss? The thought made your heart race with fear.
Suddenly, a knock on the door snapped you out of your spiraling thoughts. A maid entered, her eyes gloomy with pity . "Your Highness? Tomorrow we will wake you early to help you begin packing for the travel to the Empyrean Kingdom," she said softly, her voice trembling as she tried to avoid any kind of trouble.
You groaned and turned your head toward her. "When am I being sent to them?" you asked
"U-uh, most likely the day after tomorrow," the maid stammered, clearly uneasy with your distress.
You sighed deeply, feeling the weight of your impending fate settle even heavier on your shoulders. "I see… thank you," you muttered.
You looked back at the red headed maid “How far is the journey?” You asked her softly, she fidgeted with her fingers “a-about two days, they live f-far from our kingdom your highness” she stammered. You smiled to the red head and dismissed her.
As she left you stared at the ceiling, your mind racing. The thought of being married off to someone you had never met, someone with a terrifying reputation, filled you with a sense of dread and hopelessness. Your parents decision felt like a betrayal, a sacrifice of your happiness for the supposed greater good of the kingdom
You stood in the corner of your large room, watching as numerous servants took gowns, corsets, shoes, and other clothing items, placing them into bags. "U-uh, don’t barbarians wear less formal clothes? Shouldn’t I bring less?" you asked the maids. All of them turned to look at you, a hint of surprise on their faces.
"Her Highness makes a point," the same red-headed maid from the night before whispered to an older maid. The older maid, seemingly more experienced, turned toward you with a thoughtful expression.
"You're right, Your Royal Highness. They would probably end up burning these clothes or turning them into barbarian-styled garments," she conceded.
You sighed, your shoulders dropping in resignation. "What do barbarian women wear?" you asked the older maid, hoping for some clarity.
"Hm… flowy skirts, I’ve seen a few wear headdresses," she replied, as some of the gowns were hung back up in the closet. The maids began to sift through your belongings, selecting items that might be more appropriate for your new life.
As you watched the process, you couldn’t help but glance out the window. Your mother and father were walking in the garden, deep in conversation. They seemed so in love, so perfectly matched, yet they were throwing you into a marriage that promised nothing but misery. The contrast between their happiness and your dread was almost unbearable.
"Your Highness, we’ll pack lighter, more practical clothing for your journey," the older maid reassured.
"Thank you," you murmured, though your heart wasn't in it. The thought of being dressed in unfamiliar clothes, adapting to an unknown culture, and being wed to a man you feared only added to your anxiety.
As the servants continued their work, you wandered over to your bed, sinking down onto the edge. The weight of your impending departure pressed down on you, making it hard to breathe. You had grown up surrounded by luxury and love, and now you were being sent away, to marry probably the most violent man you’ve ever heard of
Tears welled up in your eyes as you thought about the future that awaited you. Would you ever find happiness in the Empyrean Kingdom? Would Katsuki Bakugo, the fierce and terrifying prince, ever come to care for you, or would you be nothing more than a means to an end?
"Your Highness, is there anything else you would like us to pack?" one of the younger maids asked, her voice gentle.
You shook your head, wiping away a stray tear. "No, just… make sure to leave out a few comfortable things for me to wear until we leave."
"Of course, Your Highness," she replied, her expression sympathetic.
As the maids continued their preparations, you lay back on your bed, staring up at the white ceiling. You tried to find comfort in the familiar surroundings, knowing that soon you would be leaving them behind.
"So, what's the barbarian kingdom like?" you asked, looking over to the maids. The older maid once again turned her head to look at you.
"Most of the people live in either big wooden houses with all sorts of weapons around or in these hut-like tent things. Either way, they have all these symbols painted on them," she described, clearly having been to the Empyrean Kingdom before.
"And what about the Bakugos? Where do they live? You asked
"They live in a stone castle with intricate paintings on it, and there's a lot of security. The last time I was there, they had spikes on the bridge leading to the castle, with people's heads mounted on them," the old maid replied,
"How long ago were you there?" you asked, feeling a chill run down your spine at the gruesome detail.
"When the young prince was about fifteen, so around five years ago," she said, placing one last corset into a bag.
You glanced at the six bags of items packed for your journey, feeling a mix of relief and trepidation. It was a smaller amount than you had anticipated, yet it seemed to signify the end of one life and the beginning of another.
"Did you meet the prince?" you asked, trying to glean any information that might help you understand the man you were to marry.
"Briefly," she replied, her expression softening. "He was intense, even as a teenager. Always training, always pushing himself. But there was a sadness in his eyes, a loneliness."
You sighed, trying to reconcile the image of the fierce, terrifying prince with the glimpses of vulnerability the maid described. "And the people there? How are they?"
"Fierce, proud, and loyal," the older maid said. "They value strength above all else, but they also have a deep sense of honor and community. If you earn their respect, they'll defend you with their lives."
The more you learned, the more daunting your future seemed. Yet, there was a strange comfort in knowing that the barbarian kingdom, despite its harsh exterior, had its own codes and values.
As the maids continued their work, you tried to imagine what life in the Empyrean Kingdom would be like
"Is there anything else I should know?" you asked, your voice softer, almost hesitant.
The older maid paused, considering your question. "Just remember, Your Highness, that if you respect them and they’ll respect you."
Her words resonated with you, giving you a small but vital sense of empowerment. You nodded “alright, seems easy enough..”
The day that you needed to travel to the empyrean kingdom came, your parents watched you walk to the carriage by the gate as your mother sobbed into your fathers chest.
The ride to the Empyrean Kingdom was grueling. As the carriage rattled over uneven roads, you gazed out the window, the lush greenery of your homeland gradually giving way to the rugged, bushy but covered in tall trees landscape of the barbarian territory. The closer you got, the more your anxiety grew, each kilometre bringing you closer to the empyrean land
When you finally arrived at the castle, you were struck by its threatening look. The stone walls were decorated with weird red painted symbols, and the spiked bridge, as described by the maid, loomed menacingly ahead. Your heart pounded as you stepped out of the carriage, taking in the harsh surroundings.
A group of stern-faced and very attractive guards escorted you inside. The castle's interior was as intimidating as its exterior—dimly lit, with weapons and trophies of past battles displayed prominently on the walls. You felt a shiver run down your spine as you were led through the cold halls. You swore that if you listened close enough you could hear peoples screams in the dungeons below. Fuck was this hell with its 7 rings?
Finally, you were brought to a large chamber where a tall, muscular figure stood with his back to you. His spiky blonde hair was unmistakable. He was busy looking at a sheet of paper, the one oddly similar to the ones your parents shown you when they first announced your betrothal to bakugo. As he slowly turned to face you, his piercing red eyes locked onto yours with an intensity that made you want to look away. He looked almost angry at you, furious even. Which was confusing because you’ve known this man for a whole 10 seconds
he was tall and about 6ft with messy blonde hair, scars all over his body and face, and piercings on his ears and lip.
"So, you're the princess they sent," Katsuki said, his voice dripping with disdain. He crossed his arms over his broad chest, his expression one of barely concealed annoyance. Katsuki had a deep voice that you couldn’t tell if you found attractive or if you wanted to run away and hide.
You straightened your back, meeting his gaze with as much confidence as you could muster. "I am," you replied, trying to keep your voice steady but it ended up sounding shaky.
Bakugo scoffed, looking you up and down as if to check if you were just a weak small baby or strong enough to be a wife and a queen “Great. Another weakling to babysit," he muttered under his breath.
Anger formed within you at his dismissive attitude. "I am not a weakling," you snapped. "And I am certainly not here to be babysat."
He raised an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed. "We'll see about that," he said, turning away from you. "Follow me. There's no point in wasting time."
You clenched your fists, biting back a come back to insult him with as you followed him through the castle. Every step echoed in the vast, cold corridors. His steps much louder then yours due to his much larger frame
Bakugo led you to a large hall where a group of people—presumably his advisors and some of the castle staff—were gathered. He introduced you curtly, barely sparing you a glance as he did so. The looks you received ranged from curiosity to outright hostility, they clearly didn’t want you here. Just like the old maid back had home had warned, these people hated the weak.
After the introductions, Bakugo dismissed everyone, including you. "You'll be shown to your chambers. Don't get in my way or else," he said, theblonde clearly trying to end the conversation between you two before he could get sucked into some conversation he didn’t waht
You followed a servant to your chambers, a mix of anger and sadness within you. The room was surprisingly comfortable, a stark contrast to the rest of the castle, but it did little to lift your spirits. You sat on the edge of the bed, feeling the weight of your new reality settle over you.
Over the next few days, you tried to find your place in the castle. The people were distant and wary, their lack of trust clear in their every interaction with you. And Bakugo… he was even worse than most . He ignored you most of the time, and when he did speak to you, it was with a cold, dismissive tone that made your blood boil. He always had a tone of sass, trying to get under your skin constantly.
as the days grew closer and closer to your wedding date he seemed to just get more and more annoying, constantly having some tone of sass. Never wanting to talk to you and constantly flirting with your maids, you even went the effort to fire atleast 4 of them to keep their grotty hands to themselves.
“you done firing my staff now?” Bakugo grumbled as he caught up with you in the stone candle lit halls “your staff? You mean my staff? My staff who you seem to love flirting with” you corrected him, looking over your shoulder at him. The blonde furrowed his eyebrows and scoffed “I pay for them there for their my staff.” He growled, asking faster in an attempt to intimate you “actually, your parents pay for the staff.” “Hah?” “Your parent pay for the staff so their not your staff, their the palaces staff.” You said ignorantly as you played with the lace of your dress. “You gonna get out of that frill fest you call a gown?” He asked, again trying to insult you “if I do I’m gonna shove it up your ass” “excuse me?”
“Want me to say it slower? I—WILL—SHOVE—MY—GOW”
“OKAY OKAY SHUT UP WOMAN” he growled at you and walked off in spite “THATS WHAT WHAT I THOUGHT. THATS WHAT I THOUGHT.” You angrily yelled back to him, which in real aspect you were yelling at the back of his ignorant head. You huffed and stormed away in the opposite direction as you wanted nothing more then to get away from that man. As you stomped down the halls, footsteps echoing with each step; you heard a male voice call out to you
“Princess.”
you looked over, a certain brown haired man similar looking to katsuki stared back at you. It was king Masaru “I was looking for you” he says, walking towards you. You quickly curtsied to the king “About what?” You asked “we have a wedding date for you and my son” he smiled warmly as if this was a good thing “o-oh.. and when may that be..?” Your eyebrows furrowed with frustration “a month from now, they will date you to get your gown fitted this week” he seemed overly happy about something neither you or his temperamental son wanted.
“Will I wear a wedding dress from my country or your country?” You asked softly, trying to keep your cool “uh.. our country.” He informed you “I’d rather wear my own wedding gown though, your majesty” “well.. you belong to our kingdom now. We can give you a dress that’s a mix of the two if you’d rather” he compromised, trying to keep with both your and his kingdom. Letting out a sigh your shoulders dropped “I suppose that be okay…” a look of mild disappointment on your face “wonderful, I’m glad we could come to a compromise” he smiled and walked off, an electric blonde guard following close behind him who you earlier learned his name was kaminari. The blonde goofily smiled to you, he seemed like a character. The two men walked off as they chatted, rolling your eyes you too began to walk in the direction of your bedroom chambers.
you couldn’t sleep that night, you tried changing your nightgown, exercising, reading a book, meditating, everything! nothing would help you sleep this night, you wondered if it was the weird interaction with king Masaru or the fact your own fiance was when you think about it was cheating on you with your own staff members. you slowly slid out of bed and out of your silk sheets, rubbing your face up and down with your hands with frustration. Looking down at your feet you sighed, looking out of the window. the night sky was so peaceful unlike your mind which was running with less the pleasant thoughts. How could you get Katsuki to like you? or at least tolerate you in some way so he wouldn't be the most annoying little shit.
The creak of the door hinges squeaks as you pushed the heavy wooden door open, wincing at the high pitch noise. Slowly but quietly gou walked towards the chambers of your future husband. As you approached the door you hear two voices come from the inside
“you’ll need to learn to cherish and care for her eventually”
“why would I do that?” “She is your fiancé! Your future wife! Future mother of your heirs!”
“you except me to fuck her too? Shit.”
“Yes obviously! Your gonna need heirs for our kingdom!”
“fine. Before or after this whole wedding?”
“well In her kingdom, you two do that on the wedding night but to be honest I don’t really care when you do her”
“Too easy”
safe to say your whole face was pink, with either anger or arousal but you couldn’t tell
Tag list!
@sagejin @teeesthings @hiimsaraandyou
@peachysuguru @luvgumii
@v3n7s @iangeeluv
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midwestcannibal · 2 months ago
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[has a decently normal interaction with no verbal reason to assume it was received poorly] i can feel myself spiraling as we speak
i hate u trying for communication and feeeling ashamed/embarrassed abt it
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twelveyearsofit · 2 months ago
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under pressure
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word count: 3.8k
summary: You can’t seem to get away from the Marauders and their hopeless flirting. After turning them down continually, the four of you get paired up for a Potions project. With the help of a messy dorm room and a record player, you find out you may have more in common than you thought.
content: poly!marauders x slytherin!reader, just a bit of language, kind of enemies to lovers maybe?, a tiny mention of jegulus tehe, grumpy x sunshine trope, idk i think that’s it?? lmk if there’s anything else!
authors notes: here it finally is!! sooo sorry it took me so long to post this, life has been crazy recently! also i know that under pressure isn’t exactly time accurate for when they were at hogwarts but just go along with it ily! i’m probably gonna make this a series so if you have any ideas or suggestions please leave a comment or request! anyways pretty please lmk what you think!! enjoy lovies!
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Another day of trying to fend off the Marauders with a fucking stick. You weren’t known for being particularly warm to anyone, let alone to the three boys who terrorized your house-mates daily, even though you always seemed to escape their pranks untouched. Unfortunately, your cold demeanor never deterred them from trying to charm you. Each of them, in their own way, had attempted to catch your attention, only to find your wit and icy demeanor an insurmountable wall. Every attempt was more vexing than the last, and you were growing more perturbed by the sight of them every day. It did, however, brighten your day a little, in some sick way, seeing their faces when you turned them down.
James was the first to try. Armed with his trademark confidence and lopsided grin, he cornered you outside the Potions classroom one afternoon, leaning casually against the doorframe.
“Hey angel,” he greeted, running a hand through his perpetually messy hair. “Fancy seeing you here.”
“We have class together, Potter,” you replied flatly, brushing past him and into the classroom.
Unbothered, he followed you, sliding into the seat next to yours despite the scowl you shot his way. “You know, I’ve been thinking…”
“That sounds dangerous.”
He laughed, undeterred by the jab you threw at him. “You’re funny. I like that. So, how about this—you, me, Remus, Sirius, a butterbeer in Hogsmeade this weekend?”
You didn’t even look up from your parchment. “I’d rather spend the weekend brewing Bubotuber pus.”
“Come on,” he said, leaning closer. “You’ll be missing out on the best date of your life.”
You leaned away automatically before finally meeting his gaze, your expression blank. “And you’ll be missing out on your dignity if you don’t leave me alone.”
James blinked, momentarily stunned, before letting out a bark of laughter. “Alright, angel. I like a challenge.”
“Good,” you said, turning back to your work. “Because you’re not getting anything else.”
He nodded with brows raised, “I’m aware.”
You spent the rest of class dodging his looks and ignoring his sickeningly sweet comments, gathering your books and hurrying out as soon as class was over, successfully avoiding any more hopeless persuading from James.
Sirius Black was the next to suffer. He prided himself on his charm. He’d never met a girl he couldn’t win over—until you.
It started in the library, where you were seated alone at a table, engrossed in a particularly dense-looking book. Sirius slid into the seat across from you, his signature smirk firmly in place.
“Hey there, gorgeous,” he drawled, propping his chin on his hand.
You rolled your eyes internally and didn’t look up. “Black.”
“Studying hard, I see. Not that you need to. I bet you’re brilliant at everything.”
“Flattery won’t get you anywhere,” you said, turning a page.
He grinned. “I’ve got other tricks up my sleeve.”
“I doubt that.”
His smirk faltered for a split second, but he recovered quickly. “Alright, love. What would it take to get you to have dinner with me?”
“An entirely different personality,” you said, still not looking up. You knew that statement was mostly true, or maybe, deep down, you were trying to convince yourself more than him.
He let out an exaggerated gasp. “You wound me.”
“Not yet,” you muttered, scribbling something in the margins of your book.
Sirius leaned back in his chair, clearly torn between frustration and amusement. “You’re playing hard to get.”
“No,” you said, finally meeting his eyes with a deadpan expression. “Try impossible.”
For once, Sirius had no response. He dragged in a breath, knowing he was losing momentum the longer he stayed silent. He sided with giving the table a quick tap as he got up and reluctantly walked away, mentally kicking himself for being off his game.
Remus Lupin was the final victim. He was subtler in his approach. He wasn’t one for grand gestures or flashy lines; instead, he opted for quiet conversation and shared study sessions. You were virtually looking over your shoulder every five seconds, knowing he would be trying his hand with you at some point. You avoided all three boys as much as you could, turning heel and leaving if you saw them coming your way in the corridor or entering the room you were in. Of course, your luck ran out.
He found you in the greenhouse one afternoon, tending to a particularly finicky Venomous Tentacula.
“Need a hand?” he offered, stepping carefully around the plant, his hands in his pockets.
You glanced at him, brow raised. “Not from you,” You paused, taking in the calm air around him, and against your better judgement, spoke again. “What would you know about Venomous Tentaculas?”
“Not much, but enough to know not to touch it,” he said with a small smile.
Your lips twitched, but you didn’t smile back. “I’m fine, thanks.”
He leaned against the workbench, watching you carefully prune the plant. “You’re good at this.”
“Obviously.” You kept an eye on him out of your peripherals, apprehensive, surprised he wasn’t trying to get in a spare word wherever he can, like James and Sirius did.
He chuckled softly. “I was being polite.”
“Well, don’t,” you said, setting down your shears and brushing dirt off your hands, turning to face him. “It’s unnecessary.”
Remus hesitated, then said, “You know, you don’t have to be so guarded all the time.”
Your eyes narrowed. “And you don’t have to waste your time trying to psychoanalyze me.”
“I wasn’t—”
“Yes, you were,” you scoffed, cutting him off. “And for the record, I don’t need your pity or your approval. So, if you’re done, I have actual work to do.”
Remus sighed, pushing off the workbench. “Alright, dove. I’ll leave you to it.”
And there’s another dreaded pet name. “Good idea.”
As he walked away, he glanced back over his shoulder. You were already focused on the plant again, seeming as if he hadn’t been there at all. When you heard the door shut behind Remus as he left, you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. He was the most tolerable out of the three, giving you space when you asked for it, leaving when you wanted. He was calmer than the others, a quality you appreciated. You shake the thought out of your head and pick up the shears once more.
The boys reconvened in the Gryffindor common room that evening, nursing their bruised egos.
“She’s impossible,” James declared, flopping onto the couch.
“Completely heartless,” Sirius agreed, though his tone was more impressed than frustrated.
“I told you,” Remus said calmly, sipping his tea. “She’s not interested.”
James sat up, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Or maybe… she just doesn’t know us well enough yet.”
Sirius grinned. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
Remus sighed. “This can’t possibly end well.”
But he didn’t stop them from planning their next move.
Within two weeks, their plan was in motion. The three boys were so dedicated that they spared time out of their precious weekend and stayed after Potions one day, ambushing Slughorn. Somehow, pretty easily in fact, they managed to convince him to make the four of you partners for the new project. Sirius put it under the guise of needing your “brilliant brain and knowledge” because he and James were “trying to be better students”. As if.
The next week, Slughorn announced the groups for the project. You sighed and narrowed your eyes at the three boys, knowing that somehow, this was their doing. If it was one thing, they were persistent. If only they put that effort into their schoolwork.You hoped you could just get this over with as soon as possible, you would even do all the work yourself to avoid being stuck in a room with them. You hurried out of class that day, annoyed. You shoved through the boys as they had tried to make their way to you as soon as you were dismissed.
You sat at your usual spot in the library, a fortress of books surrounding you, quill scratching furiously across parchment, trying to possibly finish the project without having any contact with the three menaces seated across the library. You could hear them whispering just a few tables away, their presence proving to be an irritating hum in the back of your mind. Sirius laughed, low and rich, and you refused to look up.
“Hey, angel,” James called, sliding into the seat across from you. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes and instead flipped the page of your textbook. “Since we’re all partners for the Potions project, we thought we’d… collaborate.”
“I don’t recall asking for collaboration,” you replied dryly, not sparing him a glance.
“That’s the thing about group projects,” Sirius chimed in, plopping into the chair beside you, a roguish grin plastered on his face. “It doesn’t require your approval.”
You raised a brow, scooting your chair away from him slightly. “I didn’t realize Gryffindors believed in forcing unwilling participants into things. Aren’t you supposed to be noble or something?”
Remus, the most tolerable of the trio, slid into the seat on your other side, carrying a stack of books. “You’re right, dove,” he said smoothly, voice calm and measured. “But unfortunately for you, Slughorn paired us up.”
Your jaw clenched. Sluggy and his infuriating belief in “Inter-House unity.”
“Fine,” you said sharply. “But don’t expect me to do all the work while you three mess around.” In truth, you were happy to do all the work if it meant you could escape this conversation.
“We wouldn’t dream of it,” James said, eyes sparkling behind his glasses.
The next evening, you found yourself in the Gryffindor dormitory, an unfamiliar space that smelled of old parchment, broom polish, faintly of Sirius’ cologne, and something you can only describe as teenage boys. You had practically begged to meet anywhere else, their dormitory being the last place you wanted to end up. Coincidentally, every option you came up with seemed to be taken. Your dorm-mates were using your dorm for their own projects, and were firm on their stance of “no boys, especially not those ones.” The library had a suspiciously timed incident of smoke bombs exploding, and all the students had to vacate until it was aired out. It had Marauders written all over it. Your house-mates would rather die than have three Gryffindors in their common room, so you didn’t even suggest it. As a last resort, you tried to coax them into working in their common room, but, once again, the answer was no. The rest of their in-house friend group decided to work right in front of the fireplace. The girl who introduced herself as Marlene definitely had a glint in her eyes, as if she was in on it. You just couldn’t win.
Reluctantly, you followed them up the stairs to work in their dorm. The room was, oddly enough, exactly what you expected. The space that was tidy with stacks of books on the floor next to the bed had to belong to Remus. Fitting. James’ and Sirius’ beds seemed to blend together, the only telling factors being the Quidditch posters by James’ bed and the record player and band posters by Sirius’. Also fitting. You knew most of the bands on Sirius’ posters. Surprised, you shook your head slightly. You couldn’t have anything in common with these boys, could you? The fourth bed, which you learned belonged to Peter, one of the boys in the group holed up in the common room, was a mix of tidy and messy, with a half-played game of chess sitting on the blanket.
There were clothes strewn on the floor between James’ and Sirius’ beds, both of the boys scrambling to pick them up and throw them out of sight as you walked in. They looked at you like they hoped you hadn’t seen it. You had. Remus scoffed a chuckle, which you somewhat appreciated, but didn’t let it show.
Now here you were, perched awkwardly on the edge of Remus’ bed, the cleanest place in the room, with your arms crossed, as the boys arranged their notes across the floor. The Gryffindor dormitory felt strangely foreign to you, with its warm tones and cozy chaos. It was nothing like the pristine coldness of the Slytherin common room, where everything was sharp edges and muted colors. Here, the atmosphere was alive, buzzing with an energy you couldn’t entirely place—and didn’t trust.
“So,” Sirius began, lounging on a pillow in his usual carefree manner, “any brilliant ideas, gorgeous?”
“I have several,” you replied, not acknowledging the irksome pet name, “but I doubt you’d appreciate the brilliance.”
James smirked. “Why so cold, angel? We’re charming, aren’t we?”
You snorted. “You’re persistent. That’s not the same thing.”
Sirius grinned, leaning forward. “I bet we’ll grow on you.”
You ignored him, focusing instead on the pile of notes on the bed in front of you. That was, until Sirius got up and began rifling through a stack of records near his bed. You rolled your eyes.
This was supposed to be about the project.
At least, that’s what you told yourself when you agreed to meet them here instead of putting your foot down and insisting on the library or another neutral space, or perhaps even working together on another day entirely. But you weren't naive—you knew better. The Marauders had been relentless in their attempts to worm their way into your life, and you had been equally relentless in shutting them down.
“You know,” James said, glancing up from his notes with an infuriating grin, ��it’s not every day we let a Slytherin into our sacred quarters.”
Sirius spoke over his shoulder as he searched through the records. “Even Regulus hasn’t seen it.” You glance at Remus as he tries to catch your attention.
He mouthed, “His brother.” to you. You roll your eyes and mouth back, “I know that. House-mates, remember?”
James responded to Sirius aloud, “...Right, yeah.” You narrowed your eyes slightly, knowing his response was suspicious, but not pushing further. None of your business.
“Oh, I’m honored,” you replied to James’ initial comment, deadpanned.
Remus shot James a look. “Don’t mind him. He’s been insufferable since he got that Outstanding in Charms.”
“Not insufferable,” James protested, recovering and tossing a quill at Remus. “Confident.”
“Arrogant.” You corrected without missing a beat.
James clutched his chest as if you’d wounded him. “You wound me, love.”
“No,” you said, inspecting your nails. “But I’m considering it.”
From the corner of the room, Sirius laughed, his voice rich and warm. “I like her. She’s got bite.”
“Wouldn’t you like to know, Black?,” you muttered, side-eyeing him as he turned around with a record in hand. You immediately kicked yourself mentally for saying something that could be misconstrued as flirting.
Sirius’ eyes lit up. “In fact I would, doll. You offering?” Sirius said, flashing you a grin. You rolled your eyes, your silence being response enough. He took the record out of its sleeve.
“What are you doing?” you asked, brow furrowing.
“Setting the mood,” he said with a wink, sliding the record onto the turntable. Moments later, the opening notes of a familiar song filled the room. The unmistakable opening notes of Under Pressure by Queen and David Bowie graced your ears.
Your quill paused mid-sentence.
You didn’t mean to react, but the music stirred something in you—an instinctive recognition, a fondness you couldn’t quite mask. Maybe you could have something in common with them after all. Your lips twitched, just barely, and though you fought to remain impassive, your lips began to move slightly to mouth the words of the song. Anyone looking would probably just assume you were just talking to yourself to figure out your assignment. Unfortunately, you had no such luck.
Remus was watching you from his place on the floor, leaning against Sirius’ bed. A small smirk formed on his face as you continued reading a Potions book, still mouthing the words to the song. He scoffed a small chuckle and shook his head, not having expected you, of all people, to listen to Queen or Bowie.
The small noise caught Sirius’ attention and his eyes flicked to Remus. He followed his gaze to you, and he caught it immediately. His dark eyes lit up like fireworks. “Wait a minute.”
You looked at him sharply. “What?”
“You like Queen,” he said, his voice brimming with something close to awe.
“It’s just a song,” you replied, tone clipped, feigning indifference, but the words didn’t carry much weight.
James and Remus exchanged a glance, both clearly intrigued.
“Oh, no, no, no,” Sirius said, practically bounding over to you, his excitement spilling over. “This isn’t ‘just a song.’ This is Queen. This is brilliance. This is art. And you, my darling—” he pointed at you dramatically, “—you know it.”
You opened your mouth to retort, but before you could, Sirius flopped onto the bed beside you, far too close for comfort. Remus chided him for messing up his blanket, a scold he hadn’t extended to you when you sat down. You leaned away from Sirius slightly, but made no effort to actually move.
“Admit it,” he said, leaning in with a conspiratorial grin. “You’ve got good taste.”
Your lips twitched again, and this time you couldn’t quite stop the ghost of a smile from appearing. “You’re ridiculous.”
“And you’re avoiding the question,” he shot back, his grin widening.
“It’s just a song,” you said stiffly, though your body language had betrayed you.
“No, no, this is monumental,” Sirius declared, rolling dramatically onto his side and throwing his arms in the air. “I knew you had taste!”
Remus took this as an opportunity to chime in. “Queen’s one of his favorite bands.”
“They’re the best band,” Sirius corrected. “And now I know you have some semblance of a soul.”
You rolled your eyes, but didn’t pull away when Sirius leaned closer, his energy almost contagious. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Black,” you said, but your lips twitched upward ever so slightly.
James, not one to miss an opportunity, tossed you another question. “Alright, love. What’s your favorite Queen song?”
You gave him a deadpan look. “I’m not playing your little games, Potter.”
“Fine.” he looked away for a moment, before turning back with a hopeful smile. “Queen or Bowie?”
Remus, ever the observant one, chimed in gently after a moment. “It’s alright, you know. You can like Queen and still pretend you don’t tolerate us.”
You rolled your eyes but didn’t deny it. The music played on, filling the room with its familiar rhythm, and for the first time that evening, for the first time with them, you felt yourself softening—just a fraction.
You hesitated, eyes flickering to Sirius, whose expression was a mix of hope and anticipation. He was grinning like he’d just won the Quidditch Cup. You scoff in resignation. “...Both. But I’m partial to Queen.”
Sirius let out a triumphant laugh, throwing his arms into the air. “I fucking knew it! She’s got taste!”
“Congratulations,” you said dryly. “You’ve discovered that I enjoy good music. What a revelation.”
“It is,” Sirius insisted, still grinning. “You’ve officially earned a pass in my book.”
You raised an eyebrow. “A pass for what?”
“For being tolerable,” he said jokingly, as if it were obvious.
“Oh, how generous of you.”
Remus chuckled softly. “You’ll have to forgive him, dove. He doesn’t know how to behave like a normal person.”
“I can see that.” You snickered dryly, appreciating the semblance of alliance you seemed to have formed with Remus.
Sirius leaned back on his elbows, watching you with an expression that was almost smug. “See, gorgeous? You’ve got more in common with us than you think.”
“Now I wouldn’t go that far,” you shot back, though the edge in your voice was noticeably duller. Sirius looked back at you deadpanned, but that smirk seemed to be glued to his face.
“Fine,” you muttered. “I like Queen. Happy?”
“Ecstatic,” Sirius said, beaming.
For the first time, you didn’t feel entirely out of place with them.
James, sensing the shift, tossed you a chocolate frog from his nightstand. “You’ve somehow found common ground with Sirius. That means you’re officially one of us now.”
You caught it, unwrapping it slowly. You raised your brows at him. “One of you? A kind offer, but no.”
Sirius threw an arm around your shoulders, grinning like a madman. The contact was uncomfortable, but you made no effort to pull away completely. Remus chimed in this time. “Sirius is the most judgemental out of all of us. You get in with him? You passed.” He shrugged at you as if his statement was absolute.
James leaned forward with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “You know, angel, we might just have to keep you around.”
You scoffed. “Please don’t.”
“Too late,” Sirius said, his grin practically splitting his face. “You’re one of us now, whether you like it or not.” He leaned towards you and placed a dramatic kiss on your cheek. This time, you leaned away, furrowing your brows at him, wiping your face with your hand.
“Watch yourself, Black. You want to keep those lips? Keep them off me.” You shot at him.
Sirius gave you the infuriatingly enticing smirk that seems to be consistently plastered to his face. “Whatever you say, doll. But soon enough, you’ll be begging for our lips on you,” He shot a wink at you.
You rolled your eyes in response, popping the chocolate frog into your mouth. You glance at the other two boys, who seem to agree with Sirius. “In your dreams, Black.”
Sirius got up from the bed, scurrying to his corner, “Oh, believe me, we see you plenty in our dreams, gorgeous.”
For the first time, you don’t have a response.
Before you could wallow in the feeling of being speechless, Sirius came back with a thick stack of records and tossed them down on the bed next to you, earning him another scold from Remus about getting floor germs on his bed. You chuckle and share a look with him, shaking your head at Sirius’ antics. Sirius began to shuffle through his albums, questioning you about every band he knew of, as he tried to find another similarity between you. James chimed in every so often, commenting on one of the few bands or songs he knew of, only to get brushed off by Sirius as he was awaiting your input. Remus looked on from the floor, periodically trying to continue to work on the project. After a while, all of your schoolwork layed forgotten on the floor. As the music played on and the boys pulled you into their banter, you found yourself relaxing—just a little. Maybe they weren’t as insufferable as you thought.
Not that you’d ever admit it.
────── ☾ ──────
351 notes · View notes
rhaeheartzsquirrelz · 3 months ago
Note
Hiii,
By any chance can you write academic rivals for either Ellie or Abby?? It doesn’t have to have smut but I just need some angst and tension >:)
YES OFC I CAN?! chat idk how to write Abby to the point where it’s accurate so I’ll stick to Ellie (for now). And uhh this is my first time writing this trope cus ive lowkey never really liked it 😕 BUT I HOPE YOU DO!! Also, I hope its not too long 4 u 😇
Paper Thin Hatred
Ellie Williams x FEMALE Reader || Academic Rivals (fluff)
You’re going in blind, no summary needed.
Warning(s): Sexual tension; making out, mentions of drugs and violence (though it’s not described). Use of y/n like once. (blehh).
A/N: I tried my best gn. If you see any mistakes, no you didnt. I’m not the best at writing angst, i hate sad stuff, so Idk if I did a good job lol.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦
You hated her.
Hated how effortlessly smart she was, able to ace every test without the need to lay even a finger on her notes. How she could easily attract everyone and anyone with a single look. How every teacher in your school had this.. bias on her. She was the exception, the favourite. It was unfair and stupid.
No matter how hard you tried, how hard you worked, it was never enough to pass her. There was nothing you could do. Study? Already tried it, ended up two points off from her perfect hundred percentage. Tutoring? Done, but it was never efficient and only wasted the little time you had after school. You had tried everything. But you still came no where near where she was.
Ever since the first grade, you’d been competing with her, butting heads on every test, every assignment, and even every small quizz. From announcing your test scores to the class after realizing you’d topped her to keeping them a secret after finding out you scored lower than her, you’d grown to despise her.
This girl, who you despised, was Ellie Williams, the top student at your school. She was, also, a dickhead to everyone else but her teachers and, surprisingly, you. She’d never think to uttered an insult in your direction, let alone bring your name up in her shit talking sessions. Even so, she was still a stuck-up brat. Thinking she was better than everyone else, demanding respect and attention.
But, even with all these reasons you hate her for, you couldn’t help but admire her carefree spirit. Holding a blunt in the bathroom and smoking it through with her group of friends. Who all, by the way, were assholes. Bullies, to be frank. You didn’t understand why Ellie hung out with a bunch of losers when she could easily make friends with someone like her, someone as smart and collected. She didn’t care. And, sometimes, you wished you didn’t either. The two of you were opposites. You wanted to forget about the grudge you’d been holding against her but you just.. couldn’t. Not when you your competitive nature shook it’s ugly head everytime you were near the auburn girl.
You cared too much, you couldn’t just flip a switch and change that?
It was none of your business, is what you’d tell yourself everytime you found your thoughts wandering off to her. And, either way, having her hang out with those kinds of people meant she would be sure to slack off. Peer pressure was a real deal, and you silently wished it’d throw Ellie down from the title of being the school’s number one student.
You were practically praying for it.
⊹₊⟡⋆
With a push on the doors, you enter the library. Backpack over your shoulders, hands stuffed in the pockets of your jacket, you look for a good place to sit. Choosing an empty corner, you got to work; Pages flipping, pen writing, and keys typing, you were almost finished with an essay of yours.
That was, until Williams showed up. A strong push on the doors you’d just came from, she confidently walked in with her hands in her pockets. She looked around to find herself, and the crowd of fans behind her, a seat. Fans, as in her loser friends. They only hung out with her because she was relevant. And she only hung out with them for free cigarettes, weed, and whatever the hell she had going on. She wore a dark blue hoodie with her usual grey sweatpants. As confident as she was, she looked fucking homeless; even though you found yourself raked over her figure.
She was lean, well built, and, clearly, visited the gym frequently. You’d never seen her flex though, only on her social media did she show off those biceps of her. Not that you cared.
When Ellie’s green eyes spotted you, she let out a devilish grin before walking over to you. Her friend group followed behind like a bunch of dogs.
“Hey, sweet thing.” Leaning a hand on your table she played with one of your pens. Without hesitation, you snatched it from her hand and gave her the dirtiest look on the face of earth. “What do you want? You know the library isn’t for fucking around, right?” With your voice as hostile as ever, all you wanted was for Ellie to fuck off. More so her friends. “I’m whispering.” She was, matter of fact she was being pretty respectful. Quiet and polite, yet so bold and confident. It pissed you off. Everything the bitch did had your blood boiling. “Anyways, what are you up to? Saw you all by yourself, need some company?” She was mocking you, evident in the way she looked down at you. As if to keep you in your place. You wanted to shove a fist in her smug little face. “I’m good.”
No way Ellie would listen to you. So, with a motion to her friends she pulled a chair beside you and sat down. Her sorry-ass friend-group walked away with a bitter chuckle. How unlucky could you get? Legs spread with her arms inbetween them she gave you a smile. Her eyes roamed over your form and then the table infront of you. Everything was neatly organized, perfectly arranged. “Need help with that essay? Or ya’ just gonna be stubborn?” You chose being stubborn. “I don’t need your help, nor do I need you to be near me.” Turning your attention back to the computer, you hoped she’d just get bored and leave. But it seemed like your annoyance only fueled her amusement, because she couldn’t keep herself from leaning closer and resting her chin on your shoulder. “Stay still.”
Like hell you would. Recoiling, you sigh in frustration. “Why the—“ An arm interrupted and pulled you back into position and she, again, rested her chin on your shoulder. Ellie was fucking strong. And, you’d only just now realized the physical power she had over you. She not only had the smarts, but she had the body. God damn it, she was better than you at everything. “Let me help.” Who the hell did she think she was? Helping you? Just because she aced every test? That didn’t mean shit. She had no right to tell you what to do, make you do what she wanted you to. Clenching your jaw, you faught the urge to push her off you and instead opted for a less obnoxious way to escape; to leave.
“I don’t need your help, like I said before I’m good.” Shrugging her off of you, you stuff everything back into your backpack with organization being the last thing on your mind. “I was trying to be nice, why the hell are you so damn stuck-up?” Scoffing and leaning back against her chair, the auburn haired girl crossed her arms and looked you up and down. The quiet action had your nerves on edge, causing a fire of insecurity to spread through your body.
She’s judging you, probably thinks you’re stupid. Maybe even thinks you’re overreacting. Is it your body she’s quietly examining or your mind? Is she noticing the curves or the faults of your figure? Either way, you needed to get the fuck out of there.
Without a word, you pull your backpack over a shoulder and bolt towards the door. The door that looked heavenly as you pushed it open. The outside air felt so much better, so much more comfortable. Your body wasn’t tense anymore, nor was your breathing shaky and stiff. The cool breeze entered your nose and you took your time to relax. Just when you were beginning to cool down, you hear this agitating voice from behind.
“Will you listen?!” You felt a tug at your wrist in which you were turned you around to face Ellie. Who was now infront of you with furrowed brows, a narrowing gaze, and that.. look on her face. The subtle expression she had was too difficult to decipher, so you gave up on even bothering to put energy into her. Especially right now. She was staring down at you, probably trying to coax out a response. “I wasn’t trying to piss you off, alright? I just..” Your heart felt like it could practically jump out your chest the more she stood there. So close yet so far. “I didn’t think you’d get mad. I.. I’m sorry for being all up in your space.” Maybe her apology was your last straw because the next thing that came out your mouth left her feeling rejected— as you’d describe it.
“You think walking around with straight A’s makes you all that?” Your furrowed brows meet her, now, raised ones, she looks confused. “I don’t give a damn about how you feel, never have never will. You’re some stuck-up wannabe and I’d rather stay the hell away from you. Got that, Williams?” You were speaking your truth, telling her what you’d been wanting to since the day you first met her. “I don’t need anything from you. I’m fine by myself.” The hostility in your words made Ellie take a step back, her expression showing just how surprised she was. The tension was thick in the cool autumn air. The breeze blew past you and you had to force yourself to meet her eyes— Her eyes that has this look of disappointment within them. Why? You wanted to ask. But, then again, you didn’t really care.
“Yeah. Alright.” Was her response, her voice quiet and low as she looked down and fidgeted with her two hands. Intertwining her fingers, picking on her nails, and even squeezing her thumb. Her jaw clenched and she averted you completely. “I’m sorry..”
You’d just bruised her ego.
⋆✴︎˚。⋆
The week before spring break, you were in class worrying your pretty ass off about all the busy work your teachers had given you. You’re talkin’ stacks of assignments and essays. Videos to watch, quizzes to answer, and books to read. With a sigh of exhaustion, you wait impatiently for class to begin. It was a typical monday, everyone was sleep deprived and already knocked out with their heads on their desks. It was a depressing sight.
But, one thing that was nagging at you all weekend was Ellie. Ironic or not, you had a heavy heart ever since you walked away from her that friday afternoon. The way she looked down, her brows furrowed with embarrassment, and her hands fidgeting with one another. The moment replayed in your head every night, causing you to loose focus on sleep and studying. Since when had you been so soft?
You hated her. So why would you feel bad? Especially after she practically mocked you because, apparently, she knows it all.
You shake the freckled girl out of your mind and focus on the lecture as class began. Weirdly enough, Ellie wasn’t present. She never missed a day of school. Was she skipping? Probably out smoking with her friends, or even snorting god knows what up her nose. You couldn’t care less, especially when you now had the advantage of attending the lecture. You were learning a new unit and were now ahead of Ellie. It was perfect. Too perfect. —
Class had ended and you were packing yourself up before your professor approached your desk. Papers in his hand, she placed them down infront of you. You looked down to find the notes from today printed onto them, they were neatly organized and well prepared. Your professor had reallyyy had made sure to make it look good.
This was an example of how being favoured benefited the stuck-up, freckled girl you called Ellie.
“Hey, y/n, would you mind handing today’s notes to Ellie?” The tall, blond, middle aged man gave you a smile. “I know you two share dorms in the same building.”
Why was that your problem? It was her job to make sure she attended class, why the hell were you chosen to do such a task? But, you couldn’t say no to your professor, not when he clearly favorited Ellie.
“No, I don’t mind. But, uhm.. what room is she in?” Your luck was so sore that you wished you’d skipped class yourself.
“Dorm four-o-eight.” He patted the papers before stuffing his hands in the pocket of her pants and walking back to the front of class.
Sometimes, you swore the universe was working overtime to make you suffer. Punish you for whatever you’d done in your past life. You never understood why you and Ellie always, somehow, ended up in the same classes, same hallways— Hell, the two you saw each other everywhere. Malls? Restaurants? It was like you were being followed.
୭ ˚. ᵎᵎ
With a loud knock, you awkwardly wait infront of Ellie’s dorm room. It felt weird standing there, mostly because of the argument you had with her a few days back. What would you even say to her? Would she even open the door? Maybe she’d shut it in your face to get back at you. All you knew was that you a task; give her the notes from class and leave. It’s not anything would go wrong, right?
The door clicked unlocked and Ellie swung it open. You were greeted with her tired expression. She stood tall, a hand on the door knob with the other scratching the back of her head. She wore a tanktop and this was the first time you’d seen her muscles. Of course, without realizing it, your eyes were practically glued to them. They were toned and stood out like a sore thumb. For a second, you wondered what else she was hiding under that tank of hers. She looked.. pretty attractive and you’d be lying if you said she didn’t. No wonder almost every girl was fanning over the 5’6 nerdy auburn.
Snapping out of your trance you meet her gaze and notice the bruise on her left eye. It was purple with a hint red. And, it definitely looked like it hurt. Did she really get into a fight? You called it. Maybe with one of her friends. Or because of her friends. That’s probably why she wasn’t in class— Either way, all you needed to do was hand her the notes and leave.
Holding out the stack of papers, you met her green eyes before she grabbed it from your hands. Her fingers, seemingly intentionally, brushed against yours for a brief moment. She flashed a smug grin as she read over it and shook her head with amusement. “Notes, huh? You makin’ sure I’m caught up, princess?” How the hell was she so.. playful after that argument, especially after that fat black eye. Did she even care? My god, was she even bothered as much as you were?
“Mr. Nunez told me to give them to you. It was against my will.” You corrected, hands dropping to your side, you turn your head to find an appropriate way to leave. Ellie, somehow, caught onto that, “Hey, you wanna come inside? I uh.. I wanted to.. talk to you. I guess?” The freckled girl, shrugging with a sheepish expression, stepped asife and motioned for you come in. The invitation was friendly, but the sight of her fucked up room made you rethink your decision. Clothes everywhere, clouded air, probably from smoking, and.. were those her fucking boxers hanging from her bed frame?!
“Ignore the mess, I’ve been.. a bit busy.” Yeah, she looked busy with that fucked up eye of hers. You took a second to think. It wouldn’t hurt, right? Plus, you’d get to see her “secret” to being the top student. Was it the way she studied? Did she cheat?
“Fine. But I’m not staying for long.” Oh, you’d be leaving the second Ellie let slip something even close to condescending. You weren’t having it with her anymore, not when she acted like royalty.
Entering her dorm, you plop yourself down onto her bed. Staying away from her clothes, which you were sure smelled, your hands stayed in your lap. You looked around, as Ellie placed the notes down onto a nearby surface, raking over the candid photos on her wall, the trinkets on her desk, and the collection of gum wrappers stamped on her dresser. She had a life, a fun one at that. But, you spotted no sign of school work.
You hadn’t realized she was sat beside you, her hands fidgeting with the strings of her pajamas shorts as she looked down. “On.. friday.” Ellie began, clearing her throat before taking a second to collect her breath; which was shaky. “I genuinely wasn’t trying to make you mad. I’m not as.. stuck-up as you think I am, I really wanted to help. Considering I’ve never even.. uhm had a proper conversation with you? I thought I’d be nice and do something good.” She shrugged out her explanation, and it make sense. You were even considering it. She looked genuine enough, maybe she was telling the truth. But the hate in you only made you see the bad.
What was the “bad” in the current situation? You didn’t really know.
“I know you.. have this grudge against me. You hate me. And, I don’t really know why.” The hint of vulnerability in her tone had your walls came crumbling down. Maybe you were naive for it but you shake your head and furrow your brows. “Hate is a strong word..” And its exactly how you had described your feelings towards Ellie since the day you two had met. “Maybe I’m just.. jealous.” Why were you being honest? You didn’t really know. You seemed to know absolutely nothing when it came to the auburn haired girl. Everytime you opened your mouth your thoughts immediately began slipping from your mouth. “You get good grades without even trying. I mean, all you do is smoke and.. fuck around.”
All you got in response with a scoff and a soft, “is that what you think?” What else were you supposed to think? “Well, I guess I do smoke. But I study. Not as hard as you, of course, but I do my best and.. well, I guess it pays off.” Leaning back on her arms, she gave you a smile. “Your anger’s justified, I don’t blame you, Princess.” And right when you were about to give her a smile back, though it’d be an awkward one, you watch as her hand shifted to resting ontop of yours.
She was making a move on you.
Flinching at the touch, you pull your hand away with an averting gaze. Was this what she wanted this whole time?
“Sorry.” Ellie shifted to pull away from you, giving you space on the bed. Your heart was racing at the small touch, not to mention you were so damn close to her. Your thighs were a shift away from touching and you suddenly felt hot. The room held a loud silence, a piercing one at that. It was awkward, uncomfortable. Both of you waited for eachother to say something, to utter a word and lighten the mood.
“I’ve always found you.. interesting.” Ellie chose to step up, placing her hand on your thigh and swallowing her nervousness down. “You’re smart, y’know? Even though you’re extra sometimes, I’ve always.. wanted your attention on me.”
For a second, you took a second to process her words, process the hand on your thigh. Her? Ellie Williams? Interested in you?
“If I’m being honest, I don’t even care about school, nor do I give a damn about my grades. I just.. ever since I realized you noticed me whenever I get a better grade than you.. I guess that’s been my goal. I don’t care about the stupid assignments, the fuckass tests, all I seem to want is for you to just.. look at me.”
What. The. Actual. Fuck. What was the hell is going on? Is she confessing some sort of.. love for you? Did she like you? Why the hell would she like you?
You couldn’t keep your reaction in check. You held your breath in shock, unable to really.. think of something to say. You felt stuck, unable to move and unable to say anything that would make the situation better. It’s like everything you thought of only seemed to make the situation.. more awkward and complicated.
After a good second of just staring at her, you clear the lump from your dry throat and try not to focus on the hand resting on your thigh. She was getting real bold, and it made you nervous. “I uhm.. that’s.. Ellie, that’s a lot to.. process..”— “So don’t.” So don’t? What in the world was this bitch on? Molly? “I’m being completely honest. Kiss me. If you like it then.. then things won’t be as complicated anymore. You’ll know—“ “Kiss you? Are you.. high or something?” Green eyes widening, you assumed her confidence was bruised by the way she slumped down and flickered her eyes away. You didn’t need her being all upset, she had no reason to be. “I’m not high.. I’m being honest. Can you really not tell?”
No, you couldn’t!
“Ellie.. that’s an insane thing to.”— “Just once won’t kill you. It’s a kiss. One simpe press on the lips.” First of all, where did this even come from? The whole kissing thing? And.. why did she have that fat bruise on her eye? Sighing, you pinch the bridge of your nose. The hell were you supposed to do? Negotiation always worked? There was no way you could kiss her, you hated her. All your life you’ve only wanted one thing; to was crush her. But, knowing all she’d ever wanted was.. well, your attention.. it had you sort of baffled. How could that be possible, seriously?
“What happened to your eye?” You avoided the subject of kissing, knowing you’d probably give up and let her do whatever she wanted to. Now, you were expecting a simple answer. Straightforward and easy to understand. You were tired of thinking.
“I beat up a kid for.. uhm, well.. talking about you?” She shrugged out, averting your gaze with a sheepish smile playing on her lips. “It’s stupid, I know. But, it didn’t happen in school so I’m not like.. suspended or.. something.” She took a second to clear her throat, “and, I didn’t wanna come to class with this fat thing around my eye.”
It was beyond stupid. Completely insane! Maybe all that smoking really had fucked up that brain of hers. It was the fact that she’d done it for you that had you taken aback. She had no reason to defend you after you’d practically told her to fuck off. Not to mention the fact that she knew you hated her. It didn’t make sense. But, maybe that black eye was enough proof that she actually might care. Actually might like you. But, could you really be sure? What if she was lying and all of this was just some sick prank?
You tilt your head to get a better look at her eye as it seemed like it was beginning to swell. “Right.. and uh, what was that kid saying?” Your question wasn’t a hard one, not for anyone but Ellie. Ellie who seemed to be struggling to find her words. Her fidgeting fingers gave it all away, not to mention her averting gaze.
It was.. sort of cute.
“Just how you were—.. I don’t wanna think about it.” She was, clearly, still bothered by the incident. She cared more about what some kid said about you than what you’d said about her. But, why? You seriously couldn’t wrap your head around it.
“Are you mad?” The green eyed girl gave you a glance before going back to fiddling with her fingers. Her hair covering most of her face as she had it down. “No, I don’t think so?” As truthful as your words were, they had you, yourself, confused. Why weren’t you mad? Usually, you’d blow up on her if she even tried talking to you. Maybe her confession had made you all mushy.
“I don’t get it, Ellie. You beat up a kid for me?” She raised her head and turned to yoy, her expression was clear then. Slightly furrowed brows with parted lips, she was still upset over the whole situation. She really must be with that bruised eye. You decided to drop the questions for now and shifted on her bed. “Can I get my kiss now?” By the time you’d leaned back against your two arms, Ellie had turned to face you. She had this look of determination and it, honest to god, had you considered her question.
“You’re not getting a kiss..”— “Alright, give me a good reason why.” Stubborn as hell. She’d never quit, you knew that. If she’d gone years just getting your attention what else could she have up her sleeve. It was just a kiss.. right? “For one, I’ve known you since the first grade. It’d be weird. Second of all, you’re Ellie. It just doesn’t make sense.” Kissing her would only cause complications, you didn’t need that. And, it’s not like you wanted a girlfriend, you had studying to do. “Those are all the reasons why you should kiss me. I don’t want some.. french kiss, just give me a press on the lips.” A small press on the lips was too much to ask for.
“What do I get in return?” Was your final question, knowing the right answer would probably lead to you making an irrational decision and kissing the girl you hated most. “Your feelings figured out. You want that, right? I’ll show you how you feel about me, please.” This bitch really was crazy. Pleading for a small kiss? She could have anyone else on the campas kiss her at an instant, so why was she asking you?
But, then again, you didn’t want to feel confused anymore. One small press on her lips as you could finally tell her you didn’t feel anything for her, then she could leave you alone. Without the need for your attention, Ellie would be sure to slack off and let her grades drop.
With a deep inhale, you lean closer. Your heart, somehow, was racing in your chest, almost going to jump out. You didn’t understand why but, your palms were suddenly sweaty and it was growing hotter in the room. The sight of Ellie staring at your lips had your mind going fuzzy, your throat goong dry. Her warm, calloused hand came to rest on your cheek as she finally pressed her lips against yours. Your mind probably went numb for a second because it took you a good while to process it all. She didn’t pull away after a peck on the lips and continued tapping kisses on your lips. It had your hands shaking, face warm, and eyes fluttering shut. She was a good kisser, the way her lips tasted, the way her thumb ran over your cheek, even the way her breath tickled your heated skin. She was damn charming and you couldn’t help but kiss back.
Before you knew it, the auburn haired girl’s hand had came to rest under your shirt and on your waist. She felt around your skin as her tongue entered your mouth and began exploring. Your stomach was fluttering like crazy, you could feel it flip everytime Ellie let slip a noise you’d never even thought you’d be able to hear. Not to mention the sound of the kiss, it was embarrassingly clumsy. Maybe because both of you were a nervous wreck. All you could think about was being in the moment, not what would happen after the kiss, not what you could do to get score higher than Ellie. Everything else seemed to disappear around you, leaving only you and the girl you were kissing relevant.
With a slight smile, she pulled away and made her way to your jaw. Placing open mouthed kisses there and, occasionally, sucking on your sensitive skin. You bit back a moan but it only backfired when she fully wrapped her arms around your waist and pulled you against her chest. “I wanna hear it, Princess..” Oh, hear she did. Your lips couldn’t contain the lewd moans and whines that dared, and succeeded, to escape. They were, undoubtedly, music to Ellie’s ears. She was enjoying all of it. “You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do this..” She whispered inbetween marking you up, her hands roaming over the bare skin of your back with a hint of desperation. As if she wanted to feel all of you, have you skin-to-skin with her. “Ellie..” Was all you could really moan out, which had her flecked cheeks red. Completely and utterly red.
And, in that moment, you’d realized just how wrong you’d gotten Ellie. She was never competing against you, all she wanted was you. Sure, you still hated how effortlessly smart she was, but, to be frank, you were willing to let your walls crumble down. Her silent confidence made you completely and utterly weak, your hate was as paper thin when it came to her. She was able to crumple it up before easily tearing it down. With a few words Ellie was able to get you to melt into her. Into the kiss.
Maybe, just maybe, you didn’t hate her as much anymore.
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