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#idk I’m just feeling generally shitty right now
bunnygirl678 · 3 months
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Made the executive decision to not work as much as I planned, I’m already at the technical hours I need for the week (if we worked a 40 hour week ahaha) gonna finish up one thing then I’m relaxing, maybe crafts maybe writing maybe drawing
I just need a break
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rahabs · 11 months
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To the anons who sent my nice messages, thank you. I saw them and cherish them and right now I am hoarding them in my inbox like a dragon with its hoard, wherein the hoard is two really nice comments that I’ve been reading when I’m sad.
#My brain has just. Not been great#There’s a lot going on and I am just. Sad a lot#I’m sad right now#Sort of a strange realisation that no one ever wants me#And I don’t mean carnally I don’t care about that?#Just in general. It’s funny#For awhile I was chalking it up to PMDD but while it’s true the three days before are really bad#It’s not really great the rest of the time either?#But right now it can’t be about me y’know#Gotta keep it together for my sister who is finally leaving her shitty ex and then it got nasty#RCMP nasty#But yeah. I’ve been dwelling#Jobs don’t want me#It feels often that my family doesn’t sometimes#My dogs both like other people more than me#And you know with dogs… Idk#I guess I wanted to be somebody’s Person. even if that somebody was a dog#And one of my dogs loves me. But the other doesn’t#It makes me sad. Like even my own dog prefers other people more than me#Which is just sort of par for the course. Like I said I’m never the one who is really Wanted#I just hang around like a bad bloodsucking tick#It’s funny because I used to be such a fighter as a kid?#But while bad things happening made my sisters fight more#It just sort of crushed me. everyone commented on how it is very odd that I’m the quiet one now#The one who listens and just takes all the shit thrown at her from everyone#Even when I don’t deserve it#They tell me I don’t have to take it but idk. someone does#And in the past when I tried to protest it I just got more shit so it is sort of like#What’s the point I guess#Ran out of tags
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sick of making plans with a specific friend only for her to not reach out abt actually hanging out until the afternoon after i’ve waited all day to hear back from her or for her to just cancel last minute entirely after i’ve again waited all day to hear back from her
#like i genuinely fucking get that sometimes life is exhausting and you’re tired and sometimes you need to take care of urself before hanging#out with people but for it to be so fucking consistent is exhausting for ME#we don’t even fucking make plans that often it’s literally maybe once a fucking month if that#like you’re telling me somehow whenever we have plans that’s when you’re SOOOOOO exhausted ?????? but you left the house 39203 other times#to do shit that takes up way more mental capacity than sitting bat your house smoking weed for a while and catching up?????#i just don’t fucking get it dude i really don’t#if i make plans with someone and the day of i don’t want to anymore i always tell them right fucking away so they don’t spend all day waitin#around and planning their entire day around it just to get fucked over#idk i’m just frustrated and probably need to eat something and i’ll be less angry#i’m just like. upset bc i don’t understand why she only ever seems to cancel on me or only seems to be soooooo exhausted when it’s the day#we planned to hang out like i just think it’s unfair to me and i Have expressed this in general before so it’s like ok cool#thanks for taking my own feelings and time into consideration 🙄🙄😐#like i literally love and adore my friends more than life itself and it just hurts and is shitty when someone doesn’t act the same even tho#they’ve said the opposite idk#i genuinely hope i don’t sound like a dick right now bc i truly really understand when ppl are mentally exhausted or deal with chronic issue#issues* bc fucking SAME HERE I ALSO DEAL WITH ALL RHAT so it’s like idk i just don’t wanna sound like a dick i am just upset i’m not feeling#like i’m loved the same as i love people idk this always happens to me i feel like i just love too much and i over project and then when i#don’t get the same things in return i feel like people actually don’t like me or secretly are tryin to separate from me idk it’s shitty i#hate it so bad i want a normal brain this shitnfucking sucks#my brain is going too hard now tho i need to stop before i spiral for real right here right now on tumblr dot com
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seungisms · 2 years
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🖇️📁 𝐒𝐊𝐙 … 𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐏𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐊 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐌 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 '𝐐𝐔𝐈𝐂𝐊 𝐇𝐈𝐃𝐄! 𝐌𝐘 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐈𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆'
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𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff and general dumbassery
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: himbo!changbin, himbo!jisung, tiktok pranks and danni's shitty attempt at comedy
𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: ngl i made felix shorter than the rest cause i just know his ass would'nt fall for this shit, my guy would probably be the one to do this prank on u 😭 similar to my last tiktok prank reaction, check it out here! reblog for a kiss, feedback much appreciated!
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𝐁𝐀𝐍𝐆 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍
your stupid tiktok pranks are the bane of this mans existence
such a boomer
stares at you like (ಠ_ಠ) as you’re trying to push him into your room to hide
he already has to deal with seven other idiots causing him emotional distress on a daily basis and yet here you are joining in?
breaks into a sweat as soon as the word ‘boyfriend’ leaves your lips
literally like ???? idk if you knew this but,,, I’M your boyfriend 
will dig his feet into the carpet as you’re trying to push him through the door and won’t move until you explain yourself >:(
you just think he looks sososo cute confused and frustrated so you crack pretty quickly 
after u explain he just does that disappointed dad sigh™️ and walks away 
if u weren’t such a cutie he would’ve ditched ur ass by now istg
𝐋𝐄𝐄 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐇𝐎
so close to snapping 
can’t deal with ur shit anymore
(he loves you really)
(but fr he’s on his last straw, you stress him out)
literally just chilling on one of his rare days off scrolling through his phone when you strike
now ur all up in his face like ‘bro u need to hide! my boyfriend is on his way!!’
legit just stares you out for a minute straight before just
‘get tf away from me 😃’
and you can tell he’s not gonna fall for another one of ur stupid pranks but u also can’t give up now cause u made a bet with felix so
‘no i’m serious! he’s like two minutes away, hide!!’
will continue sitting there
trust me he thinks ur really cute but he also wishes you’d just stfu once in awhile
if you continue on with your little prank he’ll just turn around and say ‘nah, i kinda wanna meet this guy now’
there’s no winning with his stubborn ass trust me
𝐒𝐄𝐎 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐁𝐈𝐍
was asleep
so peaceful
then suddenly a wild girlfriend (you) appears
you felt kinda bad for disturbing him cause !! he looked so cute !! all pouty and sleepy
but still tiktok pranks reign superior than ur boyfriends sleep
so fking confused and doesn’t know what tf is going on
his fight or flight kicks in as soon as ur panicked whisper of ‘quick! my boyfriend is on his way, you need to hide!’ hits his ears
tucks and rolls right underneath that bed
will peek out from under the bed and be like ‘this good? 👍’ pls
himbo!changbin for the win
will hide for a good half hour before he realises 
hey
wait
i’m the boyfriend
bitches about it for at l e a s t two weeks
𝐇𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐘𝐔𝐍𝐉𝐈𝐍
gets so worked up about it lmao
will be in the middle of a nice ~peaceful~ snack 
before being rudely interrupted
just stares u in the face with that real bitchy eye squint he loves to do
‘oh u think ur funny’
and you almost give up on the prank cause he’s just giving you the side eye while munching on his snack
loves to make you feel dumb 
he gets so annoyed over it but the more you insist on him to hide the more he actually starts to believe it
deep down he knows it’s a joke but also gets jealous over this non-existent side piece you have <3
‘okay fine, ill hide. but only cause ur cute.’
hides all grumpy in the storage cupboard with his snack
all you can hear are angry chewing noises
(ex: soobin)
another one to bring this up in future and bitch over it
whenever you ask him to help you with smith he’ll just be like
‘oh why don’t you get your boyfriend to help you’ and walks away
petty af but we been knew
but he’s pretty so you let him have it
𝐇𝐀𝐍 𝐉𝐈𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆
so :o
listens very intently as you explain that your boyfriend is on his way and immediately goes into panic mode
‘okay i have a plan’
freaks out and drags you into the empty space below your stairs while shushing you
1/3 bimboracha 
‘he won’t find us here’
doesn’t understand why ur laughing ??? this is serious ???
9/10 chance he doesn’t know what’s actually going on
another one that takes way too long to figure out that he’s your boyfriend 
so close to organising an intervention against ur tiktok pranks
will make a 20 minute powerpoint on why tiktok should be banned in the dorms and will make you sit through the whole thing
idk just don’t do this to him, his dramatic ass wouldn’t be able to handle it
𝐋𝐄𝐄 𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐗
lee felix tiktok king™️
already knows what you’re trying to do before you even do istg
he’s ten steps ahead of you at all times with this tiktok shit
catches you looking at him out of the corner of your eye all morning and giggling and kinda had an idea of what you were planning
also he saw ur tiktok likes
this isn’t a cute little prank anymore this is a competition
on guard as soon as you strike and ready to shut that shit down
‘felix, quick hide in my closet! my boyfriend is gonna be here soon!!’
literally just goes
‘i’m ur boyfriend stupid’
and that’s that
there’s no fooling him
𝐊𝐈𝐌 𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐌𝐈𝐍
you planned to strike while he was asleep cause that’s the only time ur sure he won’t just immediately dismiss you and be like ‘tf are you on?’
swats you away a good three times as you try to shake him awake
does that grumpy teenager thing where he pulls the covers over his head and just hopes you’ll leave
if he can’t see u then u can’t see him
groans as soon as he hear that stupid tiktok line leave your mouth
just goes
‘okay?? i’m asleep anyway??? literally just hang out with him in the living room and go away???’
does not give a shit
you really wanna get him though
so you invite hyunjin over
and as soon as he hears another guys voice coming from the living room you bet ur ass he’s practically throwing himself down those stairs
just stares at you and hyunjin 
so fking out of breath
grumpily walks back up those stairs and you s w e a r  you heard him mumble ‘bitch’ under his breath 😭
𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐆 𝐉𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐈𝐍
confused
but also will do whatever you say cause he’s whipped af
human personification of that one hamster meme when you come rushing up to him freaking out about how your boyfriend was on his way over
panics with u
he doesn’t like seeing you stressed :( 
but in the middle of ur ranting he’s like
‘okay wait i can just hide in there- wait, boyfrIEND?! BUT I’M UR BOYFRIEND!!!1!!!!!11!!’
literally doesn’t know what to do when you just shush him
stays hiding in there until you take pity on him and tell him to come out
does his little walk of shame out and just stands there for a good five minutes staring at you
has never felt betrayal like it
has trust issues now
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© 𝐬𝐞𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐬𝐦𝐬 — 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝. 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠/𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝.
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babygirlbites · 10 months
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Wolves and their star signs
Hello my little cherubs - how are we doing ? I hope we are doing well
Are we pretending I haven’t been gone for years? Absolutely!
Anyway, let’s talk star signs real quick. None of this is based on canon birthdays, I’m simply beyond Stephanie and her knowledge of her own characters.
These are MY opinions, which are fact as I am factually never wrong. However you are welcome to discuss
Jacob is a Leo; bold, stubborn, natural born leader. this man has main characteritis for sure. I’ve never met a Leo man who didn’t think he was always correct and was so headstrong about it, even when being actively proven wrong. I feel like Jake could wake up one morning and decide the sky is red and anyone who disagreed or god forbid brought factual evidence to him that disproved this would be ignored AND judged. However, Leo’s are loyal (to a fault, often) so although he’s headstrong he’s a ride or die for sure. If he likes you he is going to defend you against anything (excluding himself though because remember, he’s always right) and if he LOVES YOU pfft, I wouldn’t be messing with a Leo’s lover that’s for sure.
Sam is a Pisces; emotional, calm, strong willed. ugh, where do i start. Pisces are so emotional, which may seem like a good thing but I promise you those Pisces men can and will use this to manipulate, gaslight and gatekeep. He’s artistic though, and generally a reliable gent, but sometimes he can be a real nasty little man. He’s sly about his anger, he isn’t a shouting/agressive man at all, he would never DREAM of hurting you (the Emily situation will not repeat) but he can make you feel like shit emotionally. Pisces are just too clever idk I don’t mean to slander you all but as an aqua woman yous are real difficult
Embry is an Aquarius; Creative, smart, thinks outside the box, independent . He’s sensitive, but only when he’s close enough to you to allow you too see that. Aqua knows aqua, I know this boy would be super hard to get into the inner circle of. Sure, he’s openly friendly to everyone, but only the small few that HE allows close will see the real him. Once you do though, he’s an open book, belly laughing at your shitty dad jokes and ugly crying at pet rehoming tiktoks on his fyp.
Paul is a Gemini; loud, fun, and maybe a bit toxic. now I did debate aries for Paul but I just think he’s an air sign through and through. Sure, he’s firey as hell, but he’s so charming and no Aries has that level of rizz (sorry guys but the truth hurts sometimes). He’s a player through and through, he’s got a contacts list full of girls under code names like “girl from Seattle” or “drives a Honda” - which the feminist in me has an issue with but I can’t lie I love a Gemini. They are feral, and as long as you can prepare for that, then they will be the most fun you ever have. Just don’t get attached, or do, I can’t tell you what to do!
Jared is a libra; fun, lighthearted and emotionally wrecked. I love libras but damn do you guys wear your hearts on your sleeves! You’re so easily hurt, and you’ve BEEN hurt, and guess what? You’ll get hurt again. I feel like Jared’s the kind of guy to get played by the same girl/guy multiple times but still tell everyone they are his “twin flame”. Please treat this boy right - I don’t know if he can take the heartbreak (he can, and it will NOT put him off)
Quil is a cancer; he’s soft, he’s loving and he’s emotionally enlightened! We love a cancer in this house, emotional like a Pisces but open like a libra, a cancer is the right mix of mature and fun. They are sweet and sensitive and if any star sign is going to be an empath, it’s cancer. I feel like quil is the guy you go too when you’ve just found out something awful - all the guys would be there for you but where Paul or Jake or Sam even would blow a gasket and leave you alone while then went out on a rampage to hurt whomever was unlucky enough to hurt the one they love, Quil would take you in, cook for you and listen to whatever you had to say. Of course, he’s angry someone has upset you, but he’s more bothered that you are okay then that they aren’t. He’s a good guy, that’s all.
Leah is a Taurus; strong willed, well routed and stubborn. She’s practical, she’s gonna tell you straight up what she thinks with no filter, and sometimes that can hurt. She’s not the biggest personality in the room or the loudest voice at the party but she’s straight to the point and not afraid to be heard when she sees fit. She’s fun too, when she wants to be and with whom she wants to be. Under all of this though she’s family centred; she will kill for her family (and found family).
Seth is a Virgo; bold, grounded but enchanting. Virgos have a way of capturing a whole room without even having to try, they aren’t brash or loud but they are just so vibrant man idk! There’s something about them. Anyway I think Seth is just a lovely sunshine character, he’s deffo got cancer in his big three too, maybe his moon, but the Virgo energy is there for me. He’s the fun earth sign and he’s not gonna let you forget it
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sukiipjs · 6 months
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✮ BLONDIE : PT 1
°:. *₊ ° . ☆ °:. *₊ ° . ° .•
↳ nick sturniolo x masc reader
↳ words - 2239
↳ summary - you’ve been having a hard time realizing and accepting the fact that you’re gay, and in love with your best friend. you try to ignore the feelings but that only makes everything worse until you can’t hide it anymore.
↳ contains - swearing, angst, use of y/n, internalized homophobia, depression, crying, idk??? [READ PT 2 - PT 3]
↳ song - blondie by current joys
°:. *₊ ° . ☆ °:. *₊ ° . ° .•
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°:. *₊ ° . ☆
nick has been my best friend for years, he’s always been there for me, and me there for him. we met in the first grade when he saw me alone at recess on the swings and he ran up to me, asking if i wanted to play with him and his brothers. one of the many things i love about him, hes always there, always there to help, or just be with. from that day on he’s always been my number one but honestly, i’ve been kind of avoiding him lately.
of course i don’t want to, i really really don’t want to, trust me, but i don’t want to make anything bad between us either. even though pushing him away is probably fucking things up anyway.
the thing is, for months, maybe even years now i think that i might be coming to a realization: i think i’m gay, or not gay but bi? i hate labels, i dont want to be put into a box, its honestly just hard to fit into one too. i mean i’ve had girlfriends before and i’ve liked that, but nick…
okay i might be coming to another realization: i think i’m in love with nick. and to make everything worse, i can’t even talk to anyone about this because the only person i would tell is nick, but if i told him, well i just cant, it could destroy our friendship. he’d hate me, i cant lose him.
but maybe i’m not in love with him, i mean i love nick, i always have but maybe its not love love? maybe its just me appreciating our friendship more. okay who am i kidding it’s definitely becoming more, I LOVE HIM. he’s just perfect, in general, to me, to everyone. i want to spend every moment of my life with him, i want to hug him and never let him go, i want to be with him, i just want to see him again.
i can’t even imagine what he’d say if he knew i liked him. he’d probably be disgusted, i’d ruin our friendship forever. i cant do that, i can’t risk anything like that, i need him even if that means the best thing i can do is just stay away, make up lies of why i cant hang out, slowly stop texting him, i mean maybe it's not the best thing but its either i do this and try and force these feelings down or i tell him and ruin everything. this is better, or at least that’s what i keep telling myself.
☆ °:. *₊ ° . °
nick 🫶
| wanna hang out today? haven’t seen you in forever, i’m boredddd
| i know i’m sorry, but i cant today, really really sorry. still not feeling good
| that’s okay, hope you feel better though 💕 if you need anything tell me okay?
| i’d rather hang out with you and get sick then spend one more second with my idiot brothers over here 💀
i stare at the message on my screen, i’m not sick, i’m just trying to be a good friend… by avoiding my best friend… sure, whatever.
i slam down my phone on my mattress, rolling over and burying my face in my pillow. muffled screams from my mouth as tears, start to pour from my eyes. every time i message him, saying i cant hang out i immediately regret it. i want to see him, i always do but again, i cant, i fucking cant. it would only make my feelings stronger and i just need to get rid of them as soon as i can so things can just go back to how they were.
fuck, here comes the spiral that ive been replaying in my head forever. do i even really like him? am i really bi, gay, straight, whatever the fuck? i don’t even know, it’s all too confusing and stressful right now. why can’t i just be me? and have my best friend with me again? actually hang out with him, see him?
all i can really do right now is continue screaming and crying into my pillow about how much of a shitty friend i’m being, great. I constantly stalk his instagram, trying to see if i do really like him and try to see what he’s up to without me, i miss him so much.
…i wish he was a girl then i would be straight and all this shit wouldn’t hurt so much. i’m not trying to say that being gay is bad, all i’m saying is that it would be easier to figure all this out if i was straight and he was a girl. i know that’s so messed up to say but i don’t know how else to put it.
if he was a girl, i’d know that i’m in love with him, i wouldn’t be so afraid to accept myself because there wouldn’t be anything to accept. i’d just be me and he’d she’d be him her, i’d get to be his her boyfriend and we’d be a happy couple. i’d be happy and i wouldn’t have to push the person i love most in this stupid world away…
i smash my face into my silky white pillowcase over and over, shaking my head as i force the sides of the pillow into my face more. i want to suffocate.
i scream into my pillow more and more. ‘i love you nick, i love you nick, i love you. i DONT love you nick, i DONT love you nick, i DONT love you… but i do, i really really do, but i cant… i really really fucking cant.’
°:. *₊ ° . ☆
i stay rotting in my bed, spiraling about random shit, taking random quizzes of ‘am i gay?’ or ‘am i in love with my bestfriend?’ or ‘is it a crush?’ like i know.
soft blankets cover me, my silky pillows supporting my back as i rewatch rupaul's drag race on my computer until i finish it again, oreos and empty dr pepper cans surround me. and of course, nick always in my mind, everything reminding me of him, those stupid quizzes, his favorite show, his favorite drink. i wish he could be here, like how we used to hang out before i started ruining everything but i could be ruining it more, at least im keeping my mouth shut.
every once and a while, a message from nick pops up. him sending me a tiktok or telling me about how spacecamp is going or just something random, asking how im doing, if im still sick. most times i try to ignore him, turning off the notifications but i answer sometimes, only one or two words, maybe just an emoji, just trying to say something. i don’t want him to think i hate him or anything, i still of course love him.
the only time i ever get up from my bed is to go the the bathroom or get more food, ive been wearing the same two sweatpants alternating them and random shirts that i throw on the floor after i wear them for enough. my hair shaggy and a scratchy stubble on my face. i look and feel gross. i didnt think that forcing my best friend away and trying to figure out my sexuality could make me this depressed, who knew.
☆ °:. *₊ ° . °
weeks pass of me ignoring (or at least trying to ignore) nick and weeks of screaming into my sheets and sleeping all day become more and more. i finally decide to leave my apartment and stock up on some random things that will help me rot in my room even more: coffee, chips, oreos, whatever else i might want.
as i scan the aisle for dr pepper, standing in my gray hoodie with the hood covering me and one of the two sweatpants i’ve been wearing on, i hear a voice at the end of the row calling to me, “y/n?” my head turns to see who knows me that’s here, about to see how disgusting i look and just my luck, it’s nick.
“nick” a bright smile floods my face, i haven’t seen him for what seems like forever, i look at his blonde hair with grown out brunette roots, plus that signature nose ring and star earrings, of course he looks great.
he runs up to me, giving me a warm hug as he smiles too, “oh my god i haven’t seen you in decadessss” he exaggerates, laughing at me, “you feeling better now?” i tilt my head a little, confused but then i remember my lie. “oh yeah, i am. even though i dont look it” i try to scoff a laugh, looking down at myself, excusing how ‘i dont care’ i look right now.
“you look fine.” he laughs back again, “you know… me, chris and matt were gonna go out for dinner soon, wanna come?” i can tell he really wants me to be there and i really want to but i try to push it away, still.
“uhhh, i think had something later, sorry” my small smile slowly fading as his does too, i don’t think i’ve seen his smile leave that fast. “really? we haven’t talked in weeks, i miss you” he jokes a little, but really we do miss each other.
“i know, i’m sorry, but i promise we’ll hang out soon yeah?” i try to fake a small smile, trying to make this a little better but nick still looks sad, “yeah okay, see you later then?” he looks like he hates me, he looks just annoyed, hurt. i feel terrible.
“yeah, later” i’m about to walk closer to give him another hug but he leaves, to i assume go find his brothers, before i can. i’m terrible.
i finish up grabbing my things before leaving and driving off, replaying our interaction in my head. i could’ve just went? it was one dinner, that’s all. not a big deal. but it’s too late, it would just be weird if my schedule suddenly cleared up now.
°:. *₊ ° . ☆
i make my way back to my apartment, putting my bags down on the counter before going straight to my room again, flopping down on top of the pile of blankets and stuffed animals that cover my bed.
i dig in my pocket for my phone, taking it out as i grab a blanket to pull it over my face, closing off the sun that shines through my window.
i go straight to me and nicks messages, thinking of texting him. ‘i’m sorry’ too short, plain. ‘sorry, i was wrong i can go’ feels like i’m pitying him, plus just dumb. ‘i love you’ yeah definitely not. ‘come over? sorry’ again, stupid and he can NOT see the mess i have over here.
i decide on nothing and put my phone to the side of me, burying my head into my pillows again, tears flooding my eyes again again again. it’s too much. this is all stupid and i need to get over it all. this is terrible.
i go back to my cycle of curling up in warm blankets, eating my now new oreos and dr pepper and rewatching shows i’ve seen a million times before. and obviously stalking nicks instagram, he posted a story of him and his brothers at dinner. he’s still wearing those earrings and that same beige jacket he was wearing before, and he still looks great.
i swipe up, about to message him. ‘you look great, sorry i couldn’t come’ i quickly delete it and just like the story. i need to stop trying to message him when i’m trying to ignore him.
₊ ° .☆ °:. *₊
after falling asleep shortly after i finished looking at nicks story i wake up to like five texts from who? nick, of course.
nick 🫶
| are you ignoring me?
| like did i do something or what?
| are you okay?
| can we just talk or hang out please?
| y/n?
| okay sorry actually, never mind
my heart drops, i feel so TERRIBLE. nick did nothing and i never want him to think that he did something wrong. he’s perfect.
i pick up my phone to respond but honesty i don’t know if i should… i want him to know that he did nothing but he’s right about me ignoring him… fuck this. i just ignore him, still.
i shut off my phone fast and roll to my other side, curling up my legs and staring at the small textured bumps on the off-white wall that i face. i take in every detail, trying to distract myself with something else. i spot all the tiny discolorations or stains on the wall, the way it all starts to blur when tears, again, rain out my eyes.
they drip on the curves of my cheeks and lips, my hands are tucked under my legs as he tears drop onto my sheets, i don’t bother wiping them off. they make a small circle ish shape when it hits on my bed with a darker gray on my gray sheets.
my spiraling hits again when the ridges on my wall go dark as my eyes close. why can’t my best friend just be my best friend? why can’t i just be a normal person? why can’t i just forget it all? why can’t this all just go away? why? why? why? why?
☆ °:. *₊ ° . °
taglist : @slutforchriss @mattsleftnipple03 @mattsdinosweater @ccolleenn @mixvchelle @leah-loves-lilies @sturn-wrld @redz0nez9 @cheriematt @freshloveforthefit @nickuniversity @whore4matt @txssvx @will-yummy
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just-jordie-things · 1 year
Note
idk if your requests are open so i’m sorry if they’re not :( but i really really need some comfort rn so if it’s not to hard could you write jjk men comforting reader who’s just had an all around shitty day? idc who else is in it, but i really like yuta and megumi:)) -🌿
I'm always down for some blurbs! hope it gives ya some comfort nonnie <3
OKKOTSU YUUTA
okkotsu finds you sitting alone during your free period. at first very excited to approach you and ask to join, because he rarely got to spend one on one time with you. you mostly only spent time together as a group with the other second years, so this could finally be his chance to, i don't know, woo you?
but upon nearing you, he realizes that you're quietly crying to yourself, and now his excitement is replaced with concern.
"(y/n)?"
as soon as you noticed him there, you're quick to wipe your tears and plaster on a friendly smile.
"oh- hi," you chuckle nervously, and hope he hadn't seen you crying for the last ten minutes. "sorry, i didn't see you there"
"are you okay?" he asks, sitting beside you and staring at you in a way that made you embarrassed to have been caught.
"yeah, i just- yeah," you stammer, unsure of what to say, as you didn't want to bother him. "don't worry about it, i'm fine" you decide, giving him another smile that he could see right through.
"you're crying," yuuta frowns. "do you want to talk about it?"
your mouth opens, and then closes, still unsure if you should dump your issues onto him. you weren't usually one to vent to your friends, everyone had their own problems going on, it was just the way of life in this society, but yuuta seemed so genuinely concerned it would make your heart hurt to turn him away.
"you sure?" you ask quietly.
he laughs, genuinely laughs, with a smile and crinkled eyes, like you'd just told a silly joke and hadn't asked for his consent to vent your issues. you seem confused by this, which only makes him continue to chuckle as her speaks.
"of course i'm sure," he says, reaching out to brush away a stray tear you'd missed. your cheeks heat up. "we're friends, right? friends talk to each other when they're upset,"
the way your heart skipped a beat at his mere concern for your feelings didn't seem like he was just a friend to you, but you decided you could circle back to that later.
"or, if you'd rather, we could go on a snack run and watch a movie, if you just want to forget about it" he offered politely.
this time, you gave him a real smile, and it finally felt like you weren't going to burst into tears again.
"we could do both?" you suggested quietly, and yuuta grinned ear to ear. ___
FUSHIGURO MEGUMI
you weren't sure how long you'd been crying, but it was long enough that it was no longer just a cry, but definitely a full on breakdown.
which, you were a person in tune with your emotions, so when you felt like you needed to let it all out in a healthy way, you would.
but today wasn't one of those days. today was a terrible day. and it had come out of nowhere. so instead of doing any of your homework or anything to distract your mind, you'd collapsed into bed and let your emotions completely engulf you.
it's not until your phone is ringing that you even wonder how long you'd been smearing wet makeup into your pillows.
you want to take the thing and chuck it against the wall, silencing it forever, but when you see it's megumi calling you go against your better judgement.
megumi was a solid texter, like most of your generation, he hated phone calls. he would actively decline calls just to text the caller and ask what it was they needed, firmly believing there was nothing you could say in a call that couldn't be texted.
so seeing his name lighting up your screen, you figured it must have been important. sniffling and clearing your throat to hide your strained voice, you answered.
"hey, 'gumi"
"hey sweetheart," he greets, and you can hear his smile through the phone, somehow. it brightens your mood in the slightest. "you still studyin'?"
"uh," you pause, glancing over to your bag of textbooks that sat on your floor, unmoved from when you'd thrown it to the ground before falling into bed. "no"
despite you trying your best to mask your emotions, your voice cracks on the single word, and megumi being who he is, picks up on it right away.
"you alright?" he asks without missing a beat.
in the two years he'd known you, he'd never heard or seen you cry. not even after everything you'd been through together. so hearing your voice strain and crack lights up an instinct in him to protect. to fix.
"yeah, sorry," you clear your throat, hoping to feign ignorance, as though your mouth had just played a trick on you and made ou fumble your words. "what were you calling for-?"
"sounds like you've been crying," megumi cuts off the bullshit and questions her again. "what's goin' on? did something happen?"
your eyes betray you, welling with tears as megumi's concern for your well being becomes evident.
"it's nothing, i'm fine"
"you're a terrible liar, sweetheart," megumi sighs, and so do you. "what happened?"
you fall back onto your bed again, biting your lip to keep any other broken sounds from escaping you.
"nothing, really," you say through a heavy breath. "don't worry 'bout it"
just as you start to melt into the comfort of your blankets, there's a knock on your door. you lift your head at the sound, but then choose to ignore it.
"don't worry about it?" megumi repeats with a small scoff. "course i'm gonna worry about it. did someone say something? do something?"
tears prick at the corners of your eyes, threatening to send you into another sobbing fit.
"don't wanna bother you" you mumble out your lame excuse. megumi scoffs again on the other end of the line.
another knock sounds at your door.
"you could never bother me, sweetheart," he says honestly.
your heart melts at how sweet he could sound sometimes. you wonder if he even knows that he's talking like a romantic, or if that's just how he's grown to speak to you.
"now come get the door, i look like an idiot out here"
you're quick to sit up again, sliding off the bed and crossing the room to slide your door open.
sure enough, there's megumi, with his phone to his ear and a small smile on his face. he ends your call and tucks his phone into his pocket, before reaching his arms out and pulling you into him.
you practically crash into his chest, clinging to the back of his shirt as the tears pool in your eyes again. he just stands there, hugging you comfortingly and letting you cry for a few minutes. but he's the first to break the silence.
"figured you weren't doin' too well," he mumbles, resting his cheek against your head as his hand rubs circles on your back. "didn't text me all day, thought you were mad at me or somethin'"
"no," you mumbles, shaking your head against his chest. "I'm not mad at you. i just... i just had the shittiest day"
he hums, hugging you tighter.
"well, I'm here now," he says, and he doesn't know it, but it was the most comforting thing he could've told you.
well, he might've figured it out when you hold onto him even tighter, but he doesn't realize right away why that was significant to you.
"wanna talk about it?"
you look up at him, in all of your teary eyed, runny mascara glory. despite the pang of concern, he smiles at you, bringing a hand away from your back to wipe some of the black stains away from your cheeks.
you nod a little back at him.
"in bed?" you sniffle, and he nods, finally stepping into your room and sliding your door shut behind him.
"so you can fall asleep on me?" he asks.
your hand finds his and the action makes his face go hot, but he squeezes your palm reassuringly.
you nod again in answer to his question, already pulling back the blankets with your free hand so you could both climb under and end a terrible day on a good note. ___
GOJO SATORU
if this man ever finds you in a bad mood, prepare for the ultimate goddess treatment.
first, he's all over you, holding you, wiping away/kissing away your tears, but letting you get it all out. will probably pull you into his lap and rock you. early on in the relationship this might have felt infantilizing, but as time goes on it's just so comforting that you'll find yourself crawling into his lap to be cradled.
once you've got the tears out of your system, he let's you vent. and really vent, too. he'll hang onto every word as you explain the misfortune you'd encountered that day, always taking your side. if you had a fight with someone, he's shit talking them. if someone's hurt your feelings, he's shit talking them.
god forbid you've been physically hurt, because he'll teleport away and back in a matter of seconds with someone else's blood on his knuckles without question.
after you've talked through the whole situation, he's onto step three. which is fix the day! this usually includes sweets, a warm bubble bath, and then a prolonged period of cuddle time. sometimes on the couch while binging your new favorite show, and sometimes in a comfortable silence in bed. no matter where it is, expect satoru to get anything you might need. water? wine? a snack? a comfy pair of pajamas? he's up and at it before you could even think of getting up for it.
gojo satoru is already a whipped romantic, but expect ten times more praise and flirty comments after a bad day. it would almost be annoying, if he wasn't so genuine about his sweetness. you swear it's all the sugar in his system. (seriously, he'll remind you how much he loves you every two minutes. if he had control over what he said in his sleep, you were sure he'd keep at it even through the night)
even the next day you get a special breakfast and your favorite drink waiting for you when you wake up. he can't cook to save his life it definitely came from your favorite restaurant ten minutes prior <3 ___
INUMAKI TOGE
toge finding you crying only makes you want to cry more, to be honest.
you thought you'd be in the clear turning down an empty corridor when the tears finally came on. you'd been keeping them down all day, which had taken quite a lot of energy. so when they crept up on you and burned your throat, you knew you'd have to duck somewhere to quickly collect yourself before anyone could see.
unfortunately for you, the day's events wouldn't stop replaying in your mind as you wiped your eyes repeatedly, the tears were nonstop. now you were sliding down to the floor, holding your face in your hands as you sobbed quietly.
and much less to your liking, you could hear footsteps approaching. at a regular rate at first, before picking up speed and now rushing towards you.
looking up, you found a very worried looking toge kneeling before you. you wanted to tell him to go away, but he was already unzipping his collar and asking you if you were alright... in his own way.
"mustard leaf!?" it comes out panicked, afraid that he was the worst person to find you like this.
if you were having a panic attack, he feared he wouldn't be capable of helping you out of it. his cursed speech really was that sometimes, cursed.
"i- i'm fine," you hiccuped over your words.
the waterworks pouring out of your face told him the truth, and toge furrowed his brows, frowning deeply.
"jus' a bad day," you whimpered. "really, you c-can go," you hope he'll listen, and leave you be to cry over your humiliation. "i don't want you to s-see me like this"
toge shakes his head, trying to find a way to communicate what little he could that he'd never leave you here like this.
he reaches out to you, cupping your face in his hands, stroking his thumbs over your skin to wipe away the tears. the action catches you so off guard that you find yourself holding your breath. this effectively helps you to calm down and the tears eventually stop falling.
you're still a little embarrassed, but when you look at toge, he doesn't seem to pity you or mock you at all. he seems completely worried over you, his brows drawn in a knot, his own eyes glossy, he's even chewing on his lip.
he cared about you this much?
"thanks, toge" you say once you've caught your breath again, and your throat doesn't feel as strained.
he nods back at you, pinching your cheek softly, affectionately. he offers you a sweet smile, before sticking his tongue out. you give him a wobbly smile in return.
when you seem to be feeling better, he drops his hands, only to hold your shoulders and pull you forward so that he can hug you. you're stunned at first, but cave into it, wrapping your arms around his neck and clinging on, soaking up all the comfort you could get.
"i needed this" you sigh, shutting your eyes and melt into him further.
toge squeezes you back tighter. ___
don't forget to give yourself time to cry and heal lovelies <3 xoxo ~ jordie
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kamiversee · 2 months
Note
SPILL ON UR LOVELIFE OMG WHAT 👀👀 I want fanfic moments too hsjjssj
Are you ready for a yap sesh…
Okay so do y’all rmb that 6ft tall guy I was talking to & said I MIGHT be in love w? Yeah so erm… He was wayyy to lusty for me, so much so that when we talked and he’d say how much he liked me— it just felt weird because it was like “wtf do you like about me aside from the fact that I’m nice & know how to dirty talk??”
And I thought it was ironic that he was too lusty for me even tho I write literal smut in my free time but y’all I’m not even exaggerating when I say nearly every convo w tht man was about sex. And if it wasn’t about sex then it was just about something pertaining to him in general.
Anything he knew about me was info I had to just throw out there to him yk? It was like he never really asked me anything about myself unless it was something sexual. Which irked my nerves so badly because, again, wth did he like about me? The guy didn’t even know my favorite color like ??
But in the beginning I was pretty blindsided by how good the conversations were and I was just happy to receive attention in all honesty.
Anywho tho, I told my bsf about the guy & he was telling me to stop talking to him because it’s going no where, or at least tell him that I want him to start asking things about me but uh…
I’m not that kinda person y’all. I dont want to have to tell someone to be curious about me if they claim to be interested in me. It was so apparent that he was only interested in the way I gave him a listening ear on his struggles & the way I engaged in sexual convos.
So, although I felt like shit for a while because I didn’t wanna be like his other exes tht just up & left him for no reason, I eventually told him I just couldn’t talk to him romantically anymore. NOW, this was damn there the icing on the cake.
While he was really mature about it ending & basically said he understood and wasn’t going to push me about staying or anything, y’all… he didn’t even ask why I wanted things to end. I wasn’t exactly looking for him to ask why but dude, if u claimed to like me as much as you did & were oh so infatuated with me, shouldn’t you wanna know why I suddenly wanna break things off w you??? 😐
Anyway, that ended & we decided to just stay friends. Our convos got shorter and shorter & nowadays he & I both moved on.
ONTO MY CURRENT LOVE INTEREST 😁
Guys hes so.
We started talking from me giving him advice abt his ex and stuff & I met him literally right after that first guy so he even gave me advice abt him and when I told him I felt so shitty about leaving guy numb 1, he reassured me even tho he didn’t know me tht well at the time ^-^
Then from there we just became friends and would talk a lot bc he noticed my lil sugu obsession and told me he looked like him (He does lowk) which led to him sayin I should be obsessed w him instead of Sugu since he’s actually real… he lowk gagged me there guys
Aaaand we’d just talk every day more and more, all on discord btw bc it’s so silly over there (server coming when??) And like, I dont rmb when exactly he caught feelings for me but at some point I could just kinda tell.
The only thing was that it just felt too soon so when he actually confessed to me or wtv, I told him I still wanted to know more about him as a person and whatnot. AND GUYSGUYSGUYS.
So rmb guy1 right? & how he didn’t even know my fav color? I told guy2 about that and he immediately asked abt it. I KNOW that’s smth so small but pls, it was so sweet…. is the bar in hell? Idk, I swear I have standards 🙏
We even had a whole convo abt colors & it was just super cute! >< Another time, I vented and told him how guy1 didn’t rlly put in any effort to get to know me but claimed to like me and guy2 went out of his way to say how he wants to know everything about me
When I tell y’all his confession was like smth out of a damn fanfic. YALLLLLL. And it’s funny bc MLN is actually based on events tht’s happened in my life soo…
Anywho, guy2 is amazing and ilhsm. He’s so sweet and silly, I wanna eat him yall ☹️
We talk everyday & I’ve ruined my sleep schedule juust a bit for him (it was ruiened beforehand tbh)!
That’s pretty much how things r goin for me rn. Guy1 & guy2 did interact w each other at one point and it was sooo messy yall, I was not feelin it but thats a story for another time frfr
I hope you guys enjoyed my podcast :3
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tabithatwo · 1 year
Text
I love Yellowjackets okay it’s CLEAR if you observe my insane habits around this show but listen to me stay with me they so clearly did NOT have the 96 timeline planned out enough when writing the adults in season one. Or it got changed or added to or whatever to a Strong Degree. Maybe this is execs trying to make the show and it’s characters more palatable for mainstream success?? idk it feels possible to me.
But SHAUNA? Present Shauna was haunted by Jackie almost every scene of s1. It was so painfully clear how much Jackie’s presence was felt by her entire family CONSTANTLY. The bunnies, the conversations they had, the hallucinations all of it!! Jackie Jackie Jackie dead girl alive haunting the narrative. This season? Radio silence. And like pls don’t tell me shauna just has too much going on this season to feature any Jackie haunting like rewatch s1 she was PLENTY FUCKING BUSY having affairs and being blackmailed by her husband and doing murder!!! Jackie was so woven in to her character that NOTHING was untouched by her. So what, now we’ve seen Jackie’s death in 96 so she doesn’t haunt her anymore in present?? Now the baby is the strongest presence looming over her family? (This is said in an interview with the show runners and I’ve talked about it in another post!) When it wasn’t felt at all s1? No, you don’t want to spoil things in 96 so it is tricky, but there could’ve been hints. We always knew the baby would go poorly at the very fucking least. And the lack of Jackie haunting is a HUGE change. If you don’t think so, go back and watch s1 like I promise you it was POTENT. So does shifting the cause for her violence to being heavily based on losing the baby make a general audience more sympathetic to her? I think it might.
Misty?? Crystal???? If you watch s1 present Misty, there is no presence of crystals loss impacting her. They didn’t even have Crystal as a character. Misty was shown with a very unwavering proclivity to feel EXCITEMENT during horrible things. That continued into adulthood. Yeah, as we see characters more, we get more details. Sure. But the issue is the present timeline characters are only shifting based on the unfolding events of 96, you know what I mean? Like I’m sorry but the impact of Crystal and Misty’s panic around her and this new crushing GUILT for what she’s done was not a presence in s1 adult Misty. To make way for this crystal arc, teen Misty just doesn’t give a single FUCK about Ben anymore? Not obsessing with him or controlling him? And you might say she transferred her obsession. She got bored of her toy. Okay MAYBE yes, but in present day she doesn’t transfer. Walter would be a new option and she’s locked on natalie. Adult Misty has kept tabs on every single Yellowjacket, she has room for multiple lines of obsession. Her just dropping anything with Ben is odd and what makes her more sympathetic? Being a fucking monster to Ben? Or accidentally causing crystals death and mourning her and feeling an influx of guilt for her shitty actions?
I WORRY that we’re seeing a series of unplanned (therefore unshown in the adult versions of them that we ALREADY HAD in s1) events to increase sympathy and likability. I could probably think about this for more of them but shauna and Misty really stand out. YES you can and should develop characters as a series evolves, but the issue is if you show them in the PRESENT you can’t make them EVOLVE based on what you’re revealing in the PAST, does that make sense? It can inform their present actions, you can highlight different facets of them, all sorts of stuff. But this feels like something wayyy beyond that.
I hope I’m wrong and I hope they bring it back around <3 like so sincerely <3 and if you disagree and this makes perfect sense to you I’m happy for you <3 I wish that I did not feel this way <3 I’ve been trying to live in denial land about this all season <3 but it’s hitting hard right now <3
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your-queer-dad · 26 days
Note
dad! I talked to the princapal and got the right name on some papers and also he said he’d talk to all the staff
later that day a different teacher came up to me and pulled me asided and asked me if she was the one who misgendered me she was really worried and said if she did she’s sorry and she asked if I was ok and stuff she’s alright sometimes I wish it was all the time
anyway back to the shitty teacher she’s just been avoiding me I think I haven’t heard her talk about me or to me the entire while
the principal said that none of this was on purpose but like bro she’s been screaming and misgendering and she’ll be super ableist and visibly homophobic not letting boys sit near eachother and saying how like boys can’t have stuffed animals and we’re to old for itshit whenever we’d bring toys to school but she lets the girls do it! and she’ll go on rants about how boys shouldn’t to this or be this etc and how girls can’t act like this blah blah blah and it’s like hell yeah she meant it the fuck
anyway she’s either lying to him or he’s covering for her either way this is annoying he kept trying to like idk smooth it over and it’s like dude I don’t need to be best friends with her just tell her to stop being a massive pile of shit
also I got my blood drawn and they kept deadnaming me and saying how oh well when you get your name legally changed then we can call you whatever you want. And it’s like sure but you could also call me my name right now motherfucker. My mom made a comment like only a couple more months because I’ll be turning eighteen soon and I called her out cause she does this thing where she pretends to be a good mom and a ally in public but actually she’s been keeping me from transitioning and she sent me terf books and called me a demon spawn and threatens me like all the time etc and then in the car after the appointment in the car I told her she’s making excuses for the nurses and they didn’t have to deadname me and then she got mad like really fucking mad and she went all quiet and started driving crazy like dangerous crazy she does that a lot and it’s a miracle she hasn’t gotten me in a car crash I’m at home now I know she’s not safe not just from the car thing just in general she’s violent and threatens a lot and she does this thing where when she gets mad she’ll grab the back of my neck real hard and drag me around like a damn rubber chicken I started walking behind her to avoid it so it hasn’t happened in a while but idk man everything really pisses me off this is all bullshit and I’m so sick of everyone just excusing it all you feel me also some girl at school keeps coming up behind me and squeezing my neck and it keeps fucking with me cause of what my mom does that girl keeps hitting on me to she won’t leave me alone and this always fucking happens dude she’s like threatening and making jokes about sexually assaulting me and I’m like bro??? The fuck?? My parents don’t care I’ll tell the principal if it gets worse but with the way he is he’ll probably be like oh she didn’t mean it she’s so young she was just joking try to be friends she’s just a little girl blah blah blah I hate how adults justify all this shit I just want someone to call it out or get mad on my behalf for once why won’t anybody ever defend me I’ve been dealing with this for eighteen years the same shit over and over from everyone I’m just a kid to and no one ever stepped in
Hey kiddo, I am so sorry you have all of that shit to deal with, that's awful. I'm really proud of you for telling the principal and that teacher came to check that they were being okay. How your mom treats you is awful and you don't deserve any of that. I am so sorry she has been doing that. You have so much awful things happening to you and it isn't fair, not at all.
- dad x
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bbycosmo · 24 days
Text
Warning: this is a tangent from a delusion being currently frothing at the mouth for Oathbound so everything said after this statement must be taken with the finest grain of salt because clearly delusion does not = reality but I’m too far gone to understand that lol
Okay, I don’t have any sort of evidence towards this besides an incredibly inaccurate gut feeling and my brain trying to connect dots towards.
So we know that Selwyn is a Gemini
BreeBree is a Scorpio
And Nick’s birthday hasn’t been revealed yet.
Okay, so something kinda tells me what Nick can potentially be a water or earth sign, ( I’m not knowledgeable about astrology in the slightest, but after looking up the compatibility charts for Scorpio I noticed that Gemini and Scorpio has the lowest compatibility with one another, which would probably describe Sel and Bree’s relationship. And then if you look at the highest compatibility it’s Pieces, Capricorn, Virgo, Cancer)
And because Oathbound is coming out in March something just told me that like what if she sorta planned it that way? So bloodmarked was originally supposed to come out in July which would be right at the time of Gemini season so it would’ve been a Selwyn birthday book release.
But instead it was released in November on Bree’s birthday which… idk it could just be the way publishers work and small bits of pieces not being 100% but it felt intentional? Yeah this is all a whack a doodle thought but I need to release it into the aether so I can get back to my life and stop this insanity of this series taking over every aspect of my day to day thoughts.
So yeah…. in conclusion, I think that’s Oathbound being released in March might be symbolic for the trios birthdays. As a nerd I feel like having little Easter eggs and stuff like that would be really cute for the fandom and then once the series is over we can pull together all the pieces of the puzzle.
I hope I’m wrong because I don’t want to be dragged further down into my rabbit hole of this craziness any longer by the time we have to wait for another 2-3 years for the 4th and final book.
Also… while I’m here. I don’t really buy into the whole Sel as the ShadowKings son. I think perhaps Valec being related to him is more believable because clearly there is some sort of relationship between the two there; also seeing as how he was prayed that he was dead after meeting up with Sel and Bree in the forest after that whole “ I can still taste you” scene.
Although!!! What I will say is, how interesting it would be if Selwyn’s mother was the Shadow Kings daughter!!! Yes I did say I don’t buy into the whole Sel being the shadow king thing but I do think it’s plausible for him to be related to him. For the regents to be so convinced about that her bloodline is so important that they forced her to sire a child. There is clearly so much more about the Kane family that has yet to be revealed. I sit eagerly at the edge of my seat waiting for the pen to drop and all is reveled.
Again no real evidence to support this besides random hunches and feelings..
I do hope we see more Dragon Bree because dragons have been brought up since legend born and I would love to see some kick ass vengeful dragon fight scenes. I also really want to know how Nick feels. ( in general) His side of this love triangle is hanging by a thread because the readers haven’t been able to peak into his head and understand what he has been thinking and feeling for awhile.
While Nick is being discussed I still haven’t forgiven him for not considering Bree’s safety after that whole Gala incident. Why was Sel more aware of the shitty position he put Briana in !? Even Briana was so overcome with the “ we did it Joe” celebration that she was too busy getting tongued down that I don’t even think she even processes that fact. That part enrages me even now when I think about that man. Because I see so many people shit on Selwyn for being a loose cannon ( which he is!!) but for a loose cannon to be the person making statements like
“ if that is your wish” after she tells him she’s come to say goodbye
Or the whole ‘no other Merlin monologue’ where he doesn’t even confess his feelings to her ( In fact he hasn’t even explicitly said what he wants or whether or not he is in love with her. As a reader we know based on his actions there is something there but who knows if that tree loving cambion will allow himself those feelings) he simply just wants her to be happy and alive so that the world doesn’t break and go dark.
And of course let’s not forget how he seems to see Bree for who she is. And that is someone completely insufferable , stubborn, annoying, while also being remarkable, stunning and beautiful.
Okay I know I am clearly biased but, it’s just hard to see Nick the same way since that scene, and I really want a redemption story for him in Oathbound
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Update: just another thought
Since Sel is one of the few if not one of the only Merlin’s who can transform in to a bird. What if instead of the Shadow King he’s more directly related to Merlin than what the Regents have brainwashed him to believe all his life.
Related how? I’m not sure but after sleeping on it I think this makes more sense because how can we as readers completely ignore the fact that during one of Bree’s bloodwalks where she sees Merlin she finds it funny that even Merlin was known for saying
“ I am aware”
Which we know is such a Sel thing to say!!!
Like?!!!!!
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jade-kyo · 4 months
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Season 15 post Restoration thoughts
Back when Restoration was first announced I rewatched the shisno trilogy to weigh the pros and cons of everything getting retconned. I’ve decided now that Restoration has aired to do another rewatch like that but this time more just general thoughts and headcanons
welp let’s get started!
Oh hey this is actually funny
Still say Dylan’s original cameraman was funnier, they should’ve kept him instead of Jax. Frank you will always be famous to me.
KAIKAINA MY BELOVED
Bringing back Vic was a big brained move fr
On the topic of Vic I’ve always liked the theory that he was actually one of the alpha fragments, specifically the love fragments… hmm things to consider
The whole situation on chorus is also interesting… further things to consider
Oh hey look at that Dr. Grey actually sounds like herself. What a wild concept.
The reds and blues are actually friends and act like it? WHAT A WILD CONCEPT
Grimmons closet sex you will always be famous to me
But also Church basically writing gay smut of his friends is very funny
Man this is actually funny. Wild concept.
Nah but there’s a legit joke about them getting a bad movie bro predicted the future
Canon band au
I love how all the things Carolina mentions happening are so low key compared to the others. Like yeah Grif convincing Simmons GoT was real is wild meanwhile there’s actual dinosaurs
Yeah the whole red team and blue team thing IS outdated. Concept wild.
Genuinely love how you can tell just how much Carolina loves these idiots and their shenanigans. Such a concept.
“No he means Church” frothing at the mouth
OH HEY THEY GENUINELY CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER AND ABOUT CHURCH. WILDEST OF CONCEPTS
“I’m not in the military anymore” yeah Grif that sure is a GREAT point. Concepts are wild.
But also can’t believe we’ve had to watch grimmons get divorced twice
PROTECTIVE TUCKER MY BELOVED
Dead beat dad Tucker jokes my BELOATHED
Man remembering the characters ranks. Really concept the wild.
“We’re having fish” bro why did you say it like that makes you sound like a cannibal 💀
Loco you will always be famous to me
“You don’t have to destroy the past to have a future” what a great way to show that you can let go of the past and trauma while also honoring the memories of those you lost. Concepts really do be wild sometimes.
Damn I think I’m coming back around on carwash- I am not immune to hand holding and funny take off your suit bits. Platonic or romantic they make me feral. I’ll take it either way.
Freelancer death room is a genuinely cool and fucked up scene
As much as I’m enjoying this rewatch I still can’t stand the Sarge butchering that starts in this season and just get progressively worse
SERIOUSLY VIC IS A FRAGMENT HE LITERALLY SAYS “it’s me!” IN REFERENCE TO THE ALPHA
Y’all were right Temple is totally gay for Biff
Oh god I forgot about the shitty animation
Also werent the simulation bases started after Tex fled from PF?? And also after Carolina went MIA???
Rip Biff bro did not deserve that but to be fair the second he said his girl was pregnant he was doomed by the narrative
Caboose cursing my beloved
Donut is a furry confirmed
TUCKER ASKING CABOOSE HIS THOUGHTS AND EVEN AGREEING AHDKGAKSH
While I am enjoying this rewatch I think I figured out what always bugged me about this season. The reds and blues are the wrong kind of dumb. Like yeah they’re idiots but you seriously didn’t consider once that the blues and reds might be lying to you? Especially after everything that happened on Chorus?? But especially Carolina and Wash not really questioning it??? Like idk it just feels off
Temple has so much potential as a villain cause like he’s not wrong… and I think evil sim troopers is such a cool concept…much to be considered
Oh actually acknowledging how much they’ve accomplished especially on Chorus?? Of concepts to be wild
Another thing that bugs me is this constant use of “good guy/bad guy” language. just feel off for the themes of RvB.
Ah yeah Grif’s volleyballs
Grif might be able to give Wash a run for his money on that Sarge impersonation
LOCUS!!!!!
Locus-Grif team up my beloved
METAL GEAR REFERENCE SPOTTED !
EVERYONE BEING PROTECTIVE OF CABOOSE
But also I think Caboose not understanding death is weird like yeah he’s dumb but again not that kind of dumb??? Idk just one of those things that doesn’t entirely sit right with me
I do like the interactions between him and the team tho
Loopy Wash my beloved
Again will never forgive what they did to Sarge
Locus is gonna steal yo kneecaps
Ah yes Church’s obsession with fucking up Wash continues.
Honestly in hindsight I don’t actually love Wash getting shot. It really feels like they just use him as an angst punching bag because he’s a fan favorite. And this is coming from someone who LOVES angst
Also I feel like Tucker rushing out is ooc when a big part of his arc on Chorus was him doing that, getting people killed, and then learning that sometimes you gotta think things through. Kind of the start of how they undid and then redid his arc
OKAY BUT GRIF AND TUCKER MOMENT!!!!!!
Okay again this weird insistence of all the enemies being comically evil shitty people is very antithetical to the core themes are RvB
Everybody shut the fuck up the Caboose and Tucker moment after Caboose ties the guys shoelaces together is so fucking cute holy shit I am frothing at the mouth I love them so much
My hatred for anything time travel related remains
AUDIBLE GASP
GRIMMONS WHY ARE WE HERE MOMENT MY BELOVED
Yeah Sarge your monologues ARE better. Sure wish they’d remember what those monologues actually meant for your character development. Wilds the concept huh.
Man Grif choosing to stay with his friends no matter what. Truly concept in my wilds.
LOCO NOOOOOOOOOO!!
Oh god they hit you with the Caboose feels that should be illegal
Still don’t like that Caboose got to say goodbye tho. I said it last time but it’s too- fairytale-ish. The themes of grief in rvb have always been about how it’s unfair and a lot of the times you don’t get to say goodbye and you don’t get closure but you still have to learn to let go and move on despite it all. Want it noted this is also a criticism I have of the Chex stuff in restoration.
Furthermore Tucker really was prepared to create a time paradox in order to bring back Church AND THEY JUST NEVER CIRCLED BACK AROUND TO THAT???? Bro Tucker grieves Church so much and they just never address it
Also Vic’s sacrifice is further proof that he’s an alpha fragment
GRIF SIBLINGS MY BELOVEDS!!!!!!
Dylan’s speech at the end is very good and it makes me love the simulation headcanon more cause that means it’s technically Church, or at least what Church believes/hopes the world would think of the reds and blues.
Also can’t believe Temple, Bucky, and Cronut are all still alive and they just never brought them back in any way.
ALSO CAROLINA SINGING AKHSKAHSKHDKSJ
CABOOSE DRUM SOLO
Alright then that’s seasons 15! …. On my hands and knees begging for forgiveness S15 TAKE ME BACK IM SORRY I WAS EVER MEAN TO YOU!
But in all seriousness I’m way more open to this as a possibility of what happens next than I am Restoration. This is just glorified fanfiction and like it’s fun! I have fun watching it! I’ve got my complaints but still at least it gets that these characters care about each other. It may not have the strongest writing but it’s not terrible and you’ll catch me rewatching it and enjoying it from time to time.
… do I have to watch s16- can’t I just skip it? Please no amount of Restoration sucking is going to make me like that season. I might just skip it and if I’m ever feeling more up to it I’ll circle back around to it. In all honesty I think 16 and Restoration are on the same level for me. Bad seasons that I mostly ignore but I will on very rare occasions rewatch them if not just to bitch and complain. I do think Restoration is a little better than 16 but still easily in the top 3 worst seasons of RvB.
Welp in that case you will most likely see me talking about s17 next unless I’m just really feeling the self hatred enough to watch 16
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scoops404 · 6 months
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i feel horrible. I feel betrayed and I’m depressed but strangely not surprised?
Its not even, not even about who is worse or whatever, i just- I heard connor eats pants talk, he said how george and the dream team, (even if they don’t acknowledge it,) have a large young girl audience. That’s the part of the audience that helped them grow.(And id say the audience who was the most emotionally, young girls or queer people who a lot of the time grew up presenting female or queer people in general, who are also at higher risk of getting used or assaulted ) and how its disgusting and disappointing to see them drop these weird points about consent and i (as a part of that demographic myself) - that really hit me in some way. That really hit me and something about it rings in my chest with hurt an realisation. It makes me incredibly sad, and yet it makes me realise stuff.
That point to me seems incredibly important.
That fact makes their statements seem ignorant..
Im slowly coming to terms with how I personally want to move forward with acknowledging their content, the content that was genuinely helping my depression and was part of my routine. So I didn’t formulate this to be some sort of statement, but more of a “oh” moment that i wanted to share
These men don’t feel like they care about the large audience they hurt.. young girls, and how their respective statements about consent could affect idk their world view? :/
Something i got reminded of when reading tumblr after watching that connor tiktok clip of his stream.
I see where you're coming from and what you're feeling is valid and it's entirely up to you if you want to stay or not
I just think that we've seen a lot of examples of them being good to women, in a professional sense as well as personally (as recent as Sapnap's birthday stream we saw George direct the camera away from Sylvee's skirt while she was climbing the wall). This is not a defense of George's behavior regarding the Caiti situation in any way, shape, or form, but we also can't erase the good behavior that we have witnessed, you know?
Like, I've left fandoms for petty reasons and big reasons (i used to love shane dawson, I used to love david dobrik, i went on a weird hate watch spree for a couple depressing months in like 2018 for the paul brothers--i'm not proud) and when a cc's behavior becomes clear, I drop their ass. Even through the drituation, I've never seen behavior from the dreamteam that I thought was hateful against anyone and I believe they've always shown that they want to do what's right when they do mess up.
Do I think they have room to grow? Yeah, absolutely. But I don't think they secretly hate women or are exploiting us. ((no matter what Hannah is saying now, they have had many close female friends for quite a while--Puffy, Sylvee, Gia--and I feel like those people wouldn't have stuck around if they were shitty to women constantly when off camera))
I don't think this incident with Caiti is just another in a long line of dubious consent situations (not that I can know). If I thought they were doing this behind the scenes all the time, I'd nope out. I'm hoping that they can take this as a learning moment and find greater nuance in consent. We are always learning and Dream, the most, has always shown he's willing to take criticism and realize why something was wrong and not do it again. We've seen this from George too when he apologized for old screen shots with slurs. They aren't perfect, none of us are, but I have hope that they'll move forward with a clearer idea.
To be quite honest, I have seen the conversations around consent morph in my lifetime. It's a wonderful thing to see women speaking up and being believed and consequences coming down on men when, historically, that has almost never been the case. We need to keep having these conversations and reinforcing the line, no matter how uncomfortable it can be.
As far as dream team not caring about their audience, I can't really disagree with that right now lol. I certainly don't really feel cared for, but I'm here more for my friends now at this point.
Keep thinking through what this means for you and how you want to move forward for yourself. there's nothing wrong with putting them down for a while. I see a trend of former fans burning the ground as they leave, but like, you can just leave or take a little hiatus from dreamteam, and that's absolutely fine! You can always change your mind and come back, or you can find something else and get super invested in that. No one is going to track what you're doing and judge you, I promise.
As far as content to help you through depression, I can't recommend Brittany Broski and Trixie and Katya enough. I've been listening to Trixie and Katya's Podcast, the Bald and the Beautiful, for my long commutes and they keep me laughing. I'd start with their "Unhhh" youtube series though because it's..... Hilarious
Sorry this got so long. Classic Scoops
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idkhow-but-im-here · 1 year
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OK OK OK OK OK
I finally finished Good Omens season 2 and I have so many fucking thoughts which I will list in no particular order:
The Doctor Who references are always golden. (somewhat related: that part when Crowley was bullshitting about war regulations in front of Shax & co in the bookshop? super reminiscent of Ten’s speedy sci-fi jargon)
The music, as always, fucking slaps, especially at the end of each episode when the theme is played in a related style I love it so much
Nina and Maggie!!! I do really like them as a ship (coffee shop + record shop? that’s a built-in au fic) but I also like how they’re not actually together at the end. I love how they’re so healthy in how they go about their potential relationship, both acknowledging how messed up it was for Aziraphale/Crowley to meddle with their lives and how dumb it would be to rush into something headfirst regardless of all the shit they had been through both togther and as individuals. Also Fuck Lindsay all my homies hate Lindsay, as much as I liked what they did with visualising her shitty messages (the blackboard and crumpled notepad sheets? because of coffee shop reasons and how Nina’s work and love life was suffocatingly forced together by the incessant behest of Lindsay)
<The dancing/ball/Jane Austen vibes3
Beezelbub and Gabriel!?!? When I first came across this ship on ao3 I thought this ship made somewhat sense but would stay in the realms of fanon yet here I am disproven and I can’t lie… they’re kinda cute together. I was caught off guard (like every other character) but fair dues to them. Their parallels with the ineffable husbands are just ughh *chef’s kiss*
^alpha centauri!!!^
Peter Davison and Ty Tennant??? Their appearances did make me giggle for meta’s sake. Perhaps a Georgia Tennant appearance in season 3? (if they make it please please please say they’ll make it)
WAS CROWLEY ACTUALLY RAPHAEL??? I thought it was just a headcanon/fan theory (which I did fall in love with after watching this beautiful animatic years ago) but Crowley having access to classified files and the Metatron mentioning that an archangel being cast out has happened before??? it’s becoming more and more plausible.
AND JUST PRE-FALL CROWLEY IN GENERAL HE LOOKS SO HAPPY all he ever did was ask valid questions goddamnit (literally). nebulae are very pretty I would also be indignant if they weren’t gonna stick around for long. AND THE PARALLEL TO THE FIRST EPISODE WITH THE WINGSSS
Crowley just being a good nice decent person all throughout time (the goats, children, helping out elspeth, ect) it makes me happy
ANDD Aziraphale’s reactions (both positive and negative) to aforementioned deeds create a great moral foil to Crowley and perfectly builds up to what we see at the end (I’ll probably write about s2 Aziraphale in a different post because man I have so many thoughts)
Crowley’s callbacks to the date lunch at the Ritz!! Him talking to Nina and Maggie about taking Aziraphale to the Ritz again to him pointing out the lack of a nightingale (idk if that was leaning into meta a little but it didn’t bother me) just HURT so damn much
“Emotional damage support angel” you’re damn right he is/was
The battery-powered candles lmfaooo and literally any reference to the fire, including the absurd number of fire extinguishers, had me giggling
Muriel is a goddamned (or not so in some sense) treasure, a little ray of sunshine with a heart of gold and dumb of ass. I adore her and found Aziraphale and Crowley humouring her hilarious.
THE SECOND COMING??? I’m sorry wHAT WE ALREADY HAD THE ANTICHRIST NOW WE’RE DEALING WITH CHRIST CHRIST? YOU CAN’T LEAVE US WITH JUST THAT MR. GAIMAN
and of course the bloody
K I S S
THAT WHOLE SEQUENCE OF CROWLEY FINALLY FINALLY OPENING UP AND JUST BEING WHOLEHEARTEDLY HONEST (going against his predisposition and entire NATURE to lie/omit or walk around the truth)
CONFESSING HIS TRUE FEELING AFTER COUNTLESS MILLENNIA OF PINING EVEN AFTER AZIRAPHALE DROPPED THAT BOMBSHELL
AND HALF STORMING OFF BEFORE GOING BACK TO KISS THE SHIT OUT OF HIM AND THEN FULLY STORMING OFF
with aziraphale clearly unsure of how to react BUT STILL TOUCHES HIS LIPS IN SHOCK AS HE WATCHES CROWLEY LEAVE
That shit had me fully standing up on the sofa, arms in brace position, gasping, screaming, close to tears, indignantly repeating “NEIL GAIMAN!” every couple of seconds
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Truly a brilliant scene and a brilliant season overall.
As always the cast, the writers, the set designers, the effects artists, the costumers, the camera crew, everyone who had a part in creating go2 was fucking fantastic.
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alphinias · 8 months
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That bridgerton sneak peak had some good chemistry they might make me tune in idk, I usually agree with you on most things ship related but I have a problem with this specific ship, Colin is the least interesting of the siblings so far but that's okay I didn't care for anthony either before his season, my bigger problem is Penelope, I think they tried to go for the drama and the twists too much and made her seem kind of awful? They're trying to pretend racism doesn't exist in that era but the way she outed Marina in s1 ( who was not doing a good thing at all but I don't she had much of a choice given her other option was abject poverty) and the way she talks about her friends in her column and outs everyone's shit, things that have really serious consequences on people's lives. The writers literally called her a villain which???? They're doing something I feel a lot of shows have a problem with lately, trying to girlboss women doing shitty things, same with their brand of white feminism for Eloise who spends all her scenes lamenting her fate and being "quirky" with no actual depth or confronting her privilege or trying to help other women or really anything at all, all she does is talk like a "not like other girls" girlie circa Tumblr 2012 and they're thinking omg we're being such feminists right now 🤣😅🤣
Girllll you better tune in anyway so we can get more seasons and other ships you might like better! PRESERVE OUR LIMITED ROMANCE GENRE.
In all seriousness, I totally get where you’re coming from! I personally love polin and I’m very excited for them, but I don’t think the writing has always been the best. Obviously a lot of polin fans don’t agree with me, but I still think this season not being Benedict’s is so strange and a mistake. The general audience adores him and I think both Colin and Penelope could’ve done with another season of personal growth (and slow burn) to help them win over the rest of the audience more. I like Colin and I think he’s actually really funny when they give him a chance, but he’s done nothing to scream leading man like Benedict has yet. I guess S3 will tell us how much is on the writing so far vs Luke Newton. I want him to be so amazing, but I get the doubts because I still have some nerves about it too. I think the sneak peek looked great and is a great start so I’m gonna go in with optimism and positive thoughts!
Gotta defend Eloise because I think her thinking she’s ranting and valid but actually being more out of touch than she realizes is mostly purposeful! I like that as a character flaw and I think it’s realistic for someone in her position. Or maybe I just love Eloise lol. Penelope is a bit of a more… complex case. I see why people hate her, although I personally mostly like her even though I think she sucks for what she did to the Bridgertons. She’s just treated so polarizing one way or the other by the fandom and the producers are obsessed with her and I think that’s part of the problem.
I have doubts any of the Bridgerton ships will beat kathony for me but overall this fandom is so weird! I don’t get the ship wars amongst the ships because they are all canon and they’re all meant to have their spotlight and be enjoyed. I don’t mean you anon when I say this btw, I mean more the hardcore Bridgerton fandom. It’s why I don’t engage with them a lot lol. I just want to enjoy a cute ship every season.
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starry-mist · 10 months
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Okay so, as I can’t recall if I’ve delved into the mind of Season 6 Charlie here or if I’ve just posted it elsewhere, this might be repetitive or it might be brand new. (Yeah, my memory suckssss.)
Anyhoo. So in looking at what little we’ve seen of s6, and given they’ve basically all been filler episodes so far, definitely take all of this with a grain of salt. It requires a bit more continuity than we’re used to with this show, and I know we like to expect things from the writers that they rarely deliver on, but bear with me.
I think in s6, with its apparent shift in focus away from Team As Family and back to All Charlie All The Time (thanks I hate it) we’re potentially going to learn a bit more about other aspects of his character than we have previously. For instance: what’s the deal with his dad? Why have we suddenly gone from his referencing what sounded like a happy family (though to be fair, they’ve really not been mentioned that much) to this apparent friction with his dad over some kind of tension between his dad and his brother? I feel like they could potentially be setting up more of his family appearing this season, but also, as a friend helpfully pointed out, they seem to be wrapping up each episode as a stand-alone, so I could be way off base.
With regards to Charah, and Charlie’s hesitation with meeting more of Sarah’s extended family: Let’s assume that Charlie hasn’t had a ton of meaningful romantic relationships. He married young, so in theory Julia was likely his last “meet the family” experience. We know (though the writers may have forgotten) that he’s met Sarah’s parents before they were in a relationship, but meeting the extended family likely feels like a much bigger step. So the hesitancy makes some sense.
And this leads us to where Charah are at this point in time. They’re past the honeymoon phase, but they also seem to have pulled back a little relationship-wise (or they haven’t and the showrunners just decided to appease the haters, but that’s a whole other theory.) She’s taking classes, so she’s a little more busy, and he’s…randomly working on his motorcycle? Whatever, let’s just assume that was a throwaway to set up the bike stunt, IDK, I was too busy disliking the episode to pay much attention. But at any rate: while they’re clearly making time to spend with each other (lunches, dinners that we never see,) they seem to have hit pause on the depth they had in s5 (again, I’m basing this on all of two episodes, so there is a decent chance I’m wrong and this is just the general shitty continuity again.) Sarah’s got her school thing going on, she’s perpetually career-driven, so there’s that keeping her occupied and maybe making less space for her personal life.
Charlie, on the other hand…I think (and it was touched on briefly in 604, and dammit, I wish they’d give us more than throwaway lines as to his mental state) he’s worried about measuring up when it comes to Sarah. Which is a bit strange, because he’s a success in his own right, but is he potentially comparing himself to her in terms of her higher education and feeling like he’s not on her level? I mean, that’s one option (and it’s kind of a silly idea, because we all know he’s brilliant as well.)
But also: he’s at a point he’s maybe been at once before in his life, which is him considering what the future holds for this relationship. And I think he’s likely scared. He’s been burned, and his character arc for the past five seasons has been getting over the divorce and opening himself up to love again. So now he’s at that point where maybe he’s considering taking the next step with Sarah, but he’s terrified (and it’s not rational, but emotional reasoning rarely is) because he’s been burned by love and perhaps in the back of his mind he’s worried that it could happen again. Even though it shouldn’t be a worry, and they’ll eventually have their happily ever after because that’s clearly where they’re headed, I could see him having a bit of self-doubt when it comes to really committing long term. It’s something he would really wrestle with, because he knows he’s found his One, but emotional baggage can rear its ugly head at any given time.
I think this season’s arc (assuming one exists) is going to be Charlie letting go of any of that possible self-doubt, realizing he’s ready to take that next step, and really just solidifying that he’s built this life of his own after his divorce. I also think there are allusions being made to him settling down and “finding home” in the sense of perhaps officially moving in with Sarah (real estate seems to be the only theme I’ve managed to pick out so far in s6) and maybe (big maybe) we end the season with a proposal.
I do still think there is an obvious parallel between Sarah going back to school and Julia having done the same once upon a time, which was the beginning of the end for their marriage. And I do think, based on that, there is a potential for some rocky bits to come. But, I repeat, they suck at continuity so it might never be mentioned again and the school thing is just to slot Sarah into that psychologist role and we’re not meant to think more deeply about it. (We will though. Dammit, writers, throw us a bone here.)
Anyway, for the rest of the season, I look forward to the usual format which should give us a solid Sarah episode, a Joe episode or two, a couple of Jesse episodes, and my favourite “Charlie and Sarah isolated somewhere” trope, wherein some of what has turned into basically my rambling essay on the mind of Charlie Hudson (help) might actually play out. And I hope that what we’ve seen so far has just been a rocky start, and there are some really decent episodes to come.
Okay well…that was a novel. I’m so sorry. 🤣
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