#It’s funny because I used to be such a fighter as a kid?

[euthymiya]

redemption for the suffering ft. wriothesley

contains: written with female reader in mind (use of milady as a petname), reader works at the fortress, fluff, minor angst and references to violence (wrio’s past), established relationship, banter and teasing

wriothesley has an impressive collection of scars. some say it’s only proof he’s a fighter—you think it only means the world had turned its back to an undeserving kid.

but the scars are still pretty, despite it all. the world is ugly and so are its people, but never wriothesley. he’s pretty where the smooth skin meets the raised, and he’s pretty laid on your chest with his arms caging you.

he’s also pretty in other ways. (ways in which only you get to see him, and you’d like to keep it that way. the world doesn’t need to see every pretty part of him.)

“you’re staring holes into my head, sweetheart,” he mumbles, face still buried into your chest. you roll your eyes, giving him a scoff and a nudge to the back of his head for the sake of routine.

you can feel his grin through your shirt.

“how would you know that? i could’ve been staring at anything,” you huff indignantly.

“i have eyes everywhere around these parts,” he says smoothly, lifting his head up as he gives you a smug grin. it’s a charming little thing, rough and a tiny bit lopsided, far from perfect but free of any flaws.

wriothesley works in funny ways like that.

“is that so,” you challenge, clasping both hands over his cheeks and giving an affectionate squeeze. (he pretends to be greatly inconvenienced by the forced pucker of his lips from your actions, and you give them a small peck as a reward while you giggle. he’s valiant, after all, in soldiering through your whims.)

“yes, of course.” his voice is a muffled reply, courtesy of the persistent squeeze on his cheeks by your hands. “i see and hear all that goes on in these quarters.”

“i’m sure,” you chuckle. your thumb brushes over the small scar under his eye, delicately tracing the harsh edge of discolored skin.

you don’t know a lot about wriothesley. it’s a rather complicated phenomenon—you’re certain you know more than anyone, but you’re hardly confident you really know much at all. it’s not so much that he doesn’t want to tell you, but more so that you never know how to ask.

you think maybe you should. maybe you should chalk up the courage and ask him how the rips and tears of flesh have come to be. ask him how long the new, healed skin has lived across his body and become a part of him, tethering the past to the present.

so you do.

quietly, carefully, with the gentleness of a dewdrop on a fresh blade of grass, you ask him, “who gave you this?”

he hums, closing his eyes as your thumb strokes over the scar thoughtfully.

“this old thing? ah, well, it was from a battle with a treacherous beast, you see. i was protecting the fortress like any good duke would.”

you snort, and he grins wider. it’s not exactly the answer you were looking for, but it’s a sweet moment all the same—he dodges but he never runs away. you know he’d never run away because he leans closer into your touch, eyes fluttering open as he stares at you fondly.

“wrio,” you whine, “are you always so unserious?”

“on the contrary, milady, i’m afraid i have to be rather serious with a job like mine,” he chuckles. and then, with a gentle sigh, his voice softens as he adds, “i got it when i was a teenager. while i was out on the streets.”

of course, as always, it’s up to you to make sense of the very little he offers, and it’s up to you to ask for more. you don’t think he’d deny you, though. not if it’s you.

“wow, anymore details and i could probably write a biography on the fortresses warden himself for all of fontaine to read,” you say sarcastically, pulling a snort from him.

he gives you an amused squeeze before delicately trailing his hand under your shirt, tracing the skin of your belly in slow circles of his thumb. maybe, if you hadn’t learned to read him so well, you’d think it was to be affectionate. but you know him—even if you looked in blindness, you’d know him. all of him.

you know it’s from the trace of his thumb across your skin, from the presence of your touch under him, that he soothes himself. keeps himself grounded. gives himself a semblance of peace.

“well if you want to be nosy,” he huffs with no bite at all, “i got it in a fight. it’s not uncommon to be a target of robbery when you’re homeless,” he murmurs.

you’ve always known bits and pieces of his story. you knew before you came down to the fortress for work, and you know even more as you slowly get to know him, as you begin pushing past the limit of friends and crossing the threshold of lovers. running away from his parents so young couldn’t have left him with the most ideal of living circumstances—you’d always known that.

but still, hearing him say it out loud fills you up with a certain wave of emotion. you don’t like to imagine him so young, so vulnerable. so failed by the world around him.

“did you win?” you ask softly, running your hand slowly along his back.

“no,” he laughs softly, “no, i uh…i lost. pretty bad, actually. he was way bigger than me—i don’t know what i was thinking.”

sometimes, it’s easy to forget that wriothesley was a child once. just like you. just like anyone. sometimes, when you look at the tall, muscular form of a handsome man, one that seems to carry himself likes he’s always one step ahead, it slips your mind that underneath it all was once an innocent child. one who lost his battles and fell every once in a while. maybe more often than that, in fact.

you hum, tracing the letters of your name along his shoulder blade with the tip of your finger as his thumb circles the patch of skin above your hip.

“at least you were brave,” you offer, “a little dense, maybe. but still brave.”

“oh a lot more than a little dense,” he grins at you. “it was pretty stupid. i quickly learned the hard way to choose my battles wisely.”

“maybe not stupid,” you say thoughtfully, “maybe you were just a kid. a kid shouldn’t know any better—not about fighting on the streets, especially.”

he stays silent at that, breathing slowly as your palm glides over the planes of muscle along his back. firm, broad, quick witted, strong. wriothesley is all of those things now—but you wonder how much of him became this way because he had to be. because he wasn’t before and it cost him until he was.

it leaves a dull ache somewhere in your ribcage, somewhere suspiciously close to your beating heart.

“i knew better. well, eventually,” he adds that last part a little bitterly.

wriothesley is good at taking care of himself. he can throw a punch without breaking his thumb, and he can certainly dodge if a punch is coming his way instead. but you wonder if he’s ever been taken care of outside of that. if outside of quick witted survival and a firm hand to throw, he’s known anything else. anything more giving and less taking.

anything soft and honest outside of the usual harsh and deceitful.

“baby?” you ask quietly, making him hum in response, “you weren’t stupid,” you tell him. because he deserves to know—even if it’s years too late, he should hear it.

he chuckles, lifting his head from your chest as he stares at you with a quirked brow, a mix of amusement and wonder written on his face.

“yeah? you think so?”

“i know so,” you nod seriously, cupping his cheeks, “i mean it wriothesley.”

“you’re that serious, huh? the full name means we’re talking business,” he sighs.

and you know him—even with unfilled blanks and unanswered questions, you know him. always. you know the tight smile and carefully crafted confidence that hides away the delicate child underneath.

you lean in, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead, to the scar under his eye, to the corner of his lip—delicately on every part of him because none of him deserves to know roughness.

“you were just a baby,” you murmur.

“i was a young man,” he pouts. you smile fondly, shaking your head.

“you’re still a bit of a baby now,” you hum, pinching the flesh of his cheek teasingly, “the chubby cheeks never outgrew you.”

“hey,” he clicks his teeth, “don’t push it, now.”

despite it all, he slumps himself onto your chest once more, hand finding yours as he laces your fingers.

he squeezes. you squeeze back.

something in him heals at that—something young and sheltered away for so long, he forgot it existed.

“you’d win now, right?” you ask with a yawn, playing with the hair at the nape of his neck as he breathes in the scent of you through your shirt. “if you fought him?”

“oh yeah,” he chuckles, “he wouldn’t stand a chance now.”

“good,” you grin, “i’m glad.”

when you remember that he was literally canonically a homeless child who learned that sleep made you vulnerable and susceptible to robbery 🥲 hoyoverse did not come to play with his backstory

[f1crecs]

Fic Rec List - Lando/Oscar (Part 2)

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you can find part 1 here

nsfw: fly the ocean (in a silver plane) by @settsplitt | E | 2.6k Lando and Oscar are fighter jet pilots who share a room on base. Oscar doesn’t seem to think much about the risk of what they do, but it consumes Lando. This is an excellent character study and builds such a big world out of very brief moments. “Hot” and “existential worry” hold hands in a circle around this fic.

He’s practically fucking useless in the briefs and debriefs. He just feels his brain slipping away, to the sky and the seas and angels 10. He knows other people are noticing, but honestly, if they want him to be normal they should fucking put him back with Oscar. None of it matters, anyway, because Lando never has any control.

nsfw: Keep Talking by @wanderingblindly | E | 2.7k This is such a beautifully written fic! The trust and comfort here is really moving - it's a soft, syrupy sort of story, that unfolds beautifully. Love it!

With practiced hands, he slides his fingers into Lando’s curls and scratches lightly at his scalp. It shoots like lightning down Lando’s neck, ringing in his ears. 

no proof, not much (but you saw enough) by @ipleadbritney | T | 3.5k Soulmates. Lando and Oscar are pulled aside by the FIA, suspected of an illegal soulbond. What I liked about it: The character voices in this story are absolutely spot on. It's Oscar's point of view and his anxiety about the situation underlying his calm demeanor is a delicate balance this author depicts beautifully.

“Yeah?” Oscar wonders which version of Lando he'll get. Will it be the one who's hyper focused on every tiny detail, including the curls of his hair? Will it be the one who's living proof why some kids deserve to be leashed? Or will it be the Lando who flirts as much as he breathes, one step away from launching his OnlyFans account?

nsfw: Reasons Why Lando Norris Might Be A Werewolf by @fenesacha | E | 3.9k Oscar, a werewolf, starts to notice small things about his teammate that may mean Lando is a werewolf too. (He's not.) What I like it: This fic is funny and breezy with great dialogue and an Oscar perfectly happy to shift gears and take it in stride when he realises Lando isn't a werewolf, but he is something else Oscar hadn't expected.

“Your dick comes off?” Oscar blurts out before he can stop himself. Lando stares at him like he’s stupid, which makes a change. “I don’t have a dick, Oscar. It’s a packer.” Right. Oscar’s not entirely sure what a packer is, but he’s got the gist of it all. “No dick. Okay. That’s cool.” “Is it?” “Yeah, mate.” Oscar’s not a bigot, he’s just having to mentally correct every fantasy he’s had for the past God-knows-how-many years. “You’re trans, then?” “Yeah, but it’s not common knowledge, so don’t go telling all your friends.” Lando turns his head so that he’s looking at Oscar, then frowns. “Wait, so you’re not trans?” “Uh, no?” “Huh, thought you were. You give off those vibes.”

worth the trouble (it was an honour) by @maaxverstappen | G | 4.6k Oscar and Lando started something, knowing it would end. It's all sweeter than it is bitter. I'm absolutely entranced by this fic. The emotion comes across so clearly, such a perfect, gentle bittersweet feeling. I don't re-read fics often, and this is one i've found myself returning to regularly.

They were always good at that, talking without words. Sometimes, and Oscar would never admit this, he would think cough twice if you hear this, being both surprised and relieved when Lando stayed quiet.

nsfw: you signed up for this by @strawberry-daiquiris | E | 6.9k This is a wonderful magical realism au where older!Oscar time travels back and teaches Oscar how to treat Lando properly. I think writing the same character twice and all that separates them is time gone by is so impressive. it really shows great writing skills and characterisation. The smut was obviously so well written but what I loved so dearly about this is how philosophical it was, so much growth for these characters within a single evening. A true must read for the landoscar community!!

He’s looking at himself, like some kind of fucked up mirror at a funfair. It’s him, but there are lines he doesn’t recognise, a heft to his upper body he can’t feel. His face looks older, and his teeth annoyingly, a little straighter. Oscar finds, to his horror, that this is him but hotter. Less hair though, at least there’s that. “Hello.” Not-him-but-him says, with a little wave and a sideways smile. Next to him, Lando giggles, and when Oscar turns to look at him he’s returning the wave, wiggling his fingers and letting the sheet he’d pulled up to his neck drop to right below his nipples. “Stop flirting with him!” Oscar exclaims, then reconsiders his point. “Or me. Or... alright, actually mate, who the fuck are you?”

force majeure by debrief | T | 7k Oscar and Lando get bodyswapped. The author absolutely nails the voices of both characters, Lando's chaotic way of speaking versus Oscar's more measured tone. Its largely constructed as a series of text messages until the last act, which is an inspired way of showing when a character is freaking out - Lando's messages in particular get more incoherent and full of typos when he's upset. The way they gradually draw toward one another as their situation isolates them (anyone else they confide in is erased from existence after), being one another's strength and comfort and support, is really beautiful to watch unfold.

craving for caprficns sn caprin sc capri sus suns capri suns and like so theyre usually on the lower shelf in ther corner i kown cause i alswasy get then here even tho theyre pricier priceri pricier and like they werent there and i double checked i asked the emploeye that was stocking the shelves in the next aisle and she sad said she dones t know what a capri usn is?? she even asked me if it was a zodiac sun zodiac sign shit i cant cry over caprin sun osc

nsfw: love along the way by @gaslybottoms | E | 10k AU, sex work/adult entertainment. Oscar is a videographer for an adult entertainment studio. Lando is one of the performers. Oscar sees Lando struggling emotionally after intense scenes and wants to help him. Lando, though, is very reluctant to accept it. This is a wonderful fic - Oscar is hurting so badly for Lando and is desperate to comfort him, but he can only be brushed off so many times before he gives up. He is so worried for Lando that he misses signs of distress in himself, which ends up bringing about a resolution to the situation in a way nobody (including me!) expected.

It’s cheesy. A line literally straight from a porno, and one Oscar has heard so many times over the last year or so. He shouldn’t find himself hating the way it sounds, curling around Jenson’s tongue as he chases his release. He’s not even a bad guy. Outside of filming, Oscar likes him. He’s always up for a laugh, and he makes an effort to get to know about all the people that work in the agency, not just the actors he’s supposed to do scenes with. He’s always supportive, offering advice from a mature point of view. And yet. Right now, Oscar can’t stand him. The way that he gets to take care of Lando in a way that Oscar can’t, because Lando doesn’t open up to him the same way. The way of telling Oscar how he feels, not how he might open up around Oscar’s -

the sun (in your eyes) by @wisteriagoesvroom | M | 11.3k Lando stumbles upon a flower shop. Oscar's flower shop, to be precise. This is a wonderful florist!Oscar au. What I love so dearly about this is that the author has taken the lyric/concept of "you don't have to say i love you to say i love you" and applied it to flower language. How creative and clever. I love how throughout this fic Oscar and Lando really become what the other person needs, they are always there for each other. All of it just feels so safe and comforting. The dialogue is witty and fun and the descriptions are really well rounded. And as the cherry on top, this was written For Me so its wonderfully perfect.

Home. Home is pine needles and Ribena and his first car and a return ticket to Heathrow and taking your seat at your local cafe and the baristas knowing your name. But home can also be this: an open door, a room full of flowers and green and life. A cup of your favourite tea and a snack you’ve come to associate with the word comfort. A conversation with a man who offers you a safe harbour, with no conditions to be anything other than to be what you are.

nsfw: you're burning up, i'm cooling down by @foggieststars | E | 12.3k Lando and Oscar have an understanding, Oscar doesn't get to come until Lando decides he's been good enough. This fic is so good and it might be my most reread f1 fic ever at this point. The dialogue is amazing and feels so real and on point for both Lando and Oscar. Their dynamic is so fun and sexy and well written and it makes so much sense for them and what I feel like landoscar would be. I lack the words to accurately describe how good this is: the writing, the plot, the sex are all phenomenal.

He teases Oscar about it, sometimes. How badly he wants it - to win, to be good. Lando asks him if he ever gets hard in the car out of some twisted desperation to please people. He loves thinking about Oscar’s muscled thighs clenching together in the car, vibrations running through his whole body, sparking little points of contact. So Lando lets the little game drag on into the race build-up sometimes, when Oscar is okay with it.

under my skin by @lellabellawrites | M | 16.8k An AU in which Oscar and Lando are serial killers who have a meet cute while dumping bodies, and fall in love. This fic absolutely floored me with how good it was, how this pair of incredibly dangerous people managed to focus all that intensity on one another. Their devotion to one another is absolutely touching, even if you can never forget what they do for fun. Oscar is methodical and calculating, Lando is more impulsive, which is perfect characterisation and shows how well they fit together, the Yin and Yang of it all. The ending left me breathless.

Oscar knows exactly who this man is now. The Quad County Killer sprung up last summer and has been on quite a spree lately. A handful of Oscar's kills have been attributed to him, which should be a relief from the extra cover it brings, but instead only pisses him off. This guy works recklessly, leaving his kills out in the open like he wants to be found out. Oscar would like the papers to give him a little more credit than that. "I work better alone." His disdain must be evident as the man relents with a sneer of disappointment. "Could you at least help me drag this down—" "No." "Fine." He takes one end of the duffel and heaves it over the curb with more strength than Oscar would have expected from his slender frame. "Did you sink yours or float?" "Sink. I'm not an idiot." "Alright. Rude."

you be time, i'll be space by littleplumtree | M | 50.8k Lando and Oscar are part of a space exploration team with the goal of finding sentient life outside of earth. why I like it: This author is a master of the details. Every piece, every detail, every action and reaction, they all serve to make the story richer and more vibrant. The characterization, too, feels comfortable and real. It's a joy to read.

With his eye to the microscope, Lando makes a heart wrenching little sound of relief. “Oh. Oh my god. There you are.” Oscar leans his elbows on the bench and stares into the tank. There’s nothing to see with the naked eye, but in that water is something that could one day, given all the time in the world, evolve into something like themselves. Maybe one day they’ll build pyramids and cry at sad movies and invent Tupperware and come up with a thousand different ways to insult each other online.

nsfw: Casual by @loquarocoeur | E | 95k AU, college roommates. Lando is perpetually horny and unlucky when it comes to hookups. He suggests that he and Oscar should just be friends with benefits, you know. Casual. Oscar agrees, even though he is madly in love with Lando and knows its a recipe for disaster. Lando gradually starts to realise the same. I am insane for just how good this fic is. It's not that the guys don't talk, they talk all the time and even communicate about their unique situation, they understand one another deeply and yet they still don't realise what space they occupy in one another's hearts. They are completely compatible in bed, if only they knew - Lando in particular is self conscious about the way he gets in bed and fights his very nature, all while not realising Oscar likes him that way. The angst is heavy but they get there in the end, while it has plenty of funny dialogue moments to lighten things. The characterisation is wonderful all round.

“So I stopped asking for sex and now we haven’t fucked in like five days which should be fine, but I don’t know, I’m getting desperate and he's just, like, fine, so maybe he doesn't need the sex, maybe he doesn't want the sex anymore, but he just can't admit it—” “Okay, Lando, I think you’re really overthinking—” “No! Because you see the fucking isn’t the only thing, the thing is that somehow we’ve sort of accidentally slept in the same bed for like a week and now we’re sort of fighting so I couldn’t sleep last night.” “Accidentally... For a week?”

[nkogneatho]

fluff you say ... what about soshiro walking in on us applying make up for... i dunno, a night with the girls or something? i think he'd be so fascinated like, wow there's so much of it? what's this for? how do you apply that? hope that's ok, love you :3

hoshina is unfamiliar with makeup. all the women he knows in his life have never applied them except for an occasional lipstick because defence force fighters don't have that sort of interest. maybe some do but there's code of conduct to be followed. so when he starts dating you, he is welcomed to a whole new world of things.

it was a day off for trainees so you decided to do something fun. first thing first was to look pretty. fighting all these ugly kaijus had stressed you out so much you forgot to make yourself feel good. soshiro walked in on you applying foundation, a pretty hello kitty headband on your head holding you head back. you greeted him and he kissed your head, taking a seat next to you watched the beauty blender patting your skin.

"what's this?" he asked.

"oh it's a beauty blender. you blend makeup with this for a smoother finish." when you were done with it, you put it on the table. hoshina picked it up, the damp feeling giving him creeps at first and then he started playing it.

"this thing is for make up? hahaha looks like a kids toy. boingboingboing it is so funny."

"how did you become the vice-captain, i will never know." you rolled your eyes. his curiously stared at you as you started applying contour and blush.

"what's this now? oh, wait. i know this one. this is lipstick."

"nice try but that's blush. you apply it on your cheeks. can be used as a lipstick too i guess.

"and what's that in your hand?"

"this?" you pointed the black pencil. "oh this is a liner. you line your eyelids with this."

"why would anyone ever want to do that? your eyes look perfect, babe."

"yeah but i like changing the shape of my eyes. like siren eyes, doe eyes etc etc." he was so dumbfounded.

"whaaaat? you can change your eye shape with a pencil?"

"well not change but more like drawing on them so it is like an illusion." he watched as your glided the liner on your eye, and then face him. "see?" your one eye bare while the other lined black.

"ohh, it really does." he says in amusement. "can you do mine too babe?"

"what? what do you need a liner for?"

"if i am dating such a pretty girl, i wanna look pretty too." you can't help but smile at that when he is already rummaging through your makeup on the table in excitment. who's gonna tell him he is already pretty?

[spiders-hth-is-an-outlier]

I'm sure he's not the first in history, but for me definitely, the reason Fox Mulder was such a revelation is that I'd never seen a character before who seemed totally conscious of masculinity as a performance, while also being pretty good at that performance.

Like, we kid, but Mulder is doing pretty well, as a man! He's got a badge and a gun, prestigious credentials and a bunch of sharp-ass suits. He's smart, he's funny, he's hot, he's not primarily a fighter, but he can fight when he has to. If there's a fairly straightforward, down-the-line Socially Acceptable way to be a (rich white) man in the 1990s, Mulder is basically ticking all the boxes correctly.

What's cool about him -- and I personally think this is what Duchovny specifically, a known weirdo, brings to the character -- is that Mulder's subjective internal experience of the world is that he's a weirdo. He knows that. In his head, he's preoccupied with this wild psychodrama of his guilt and his paranoia. He lives kind of like a weirdo, when he's not on the clock. He seems to like and trust weirdos. He's pretty introverted and he has a weird, bleak sense of humor.

The feeling I always got about Mulder is that he knows he's ticking boxes. He wakes up every day conscious of the fact that he has a job to keep and he has to Act Normal, so he does things like get his suits tailored and work out and he's clearly playing a role, and he's only as invested in that role as he judges he'll benefit from. He doesn't actually give a shit personally, except that he needs people to tolerate him to a certain degree in order to be functional in the world.

I think he's so appealing to me because he was the first character I ever saw who seemed to be self-consciously participating in the game of Being a High-Value Man (before that specific lingo was coined), while clearly viewing the game as a useful absurdity. He's literally putting on and taking off his Patriarchal Authority Figure drag, for his own purposes, and that's a big chunk of what I've always loved about him.

[pianokantzart]

How do you feel about DK? (either in general or his relationship w/ Mario)

I just generally think DK's hilarious.

He's the best fighter in his kingdom to the point that he's hailed as a celebrity, and yet he is so fantastically bitter about the fact that he got his ass kicked by a tiny inexperienced man in overalls. Which, frankly, is his own darn fault for being too self confident to use powerups during the fight.

Meanwhile Mario's just... existing. He doesn't even care much that he beat DK, to him it was merely a stepping stone to reach his brother. Mario is just like "good game" and goes out of his way to be nothing but nice, while the entire time the gorilla is FUMING. He desperately wants round two.

I also like the fact that they didn't really bond over any deep conversation or their shared daddy issues, but instead reached a mutual understanding by fighting a common enemy. It gives me hope that Mario and DK will maintain a frenemy vibe in the future, because the way they rub each other the wrong way is so legitimately funny.

On a side note... I also like how friendly DK was to Luigi after first meeting him? Like that accidentally-aggressive elbow nudge when Bowser got put into the jar.

It was a short interaction, but it gave me major "frat boy who makes sure the anxious kid feels included" vibes.

[weirdmarioenemies]

Ah... ze humble pill bug. Shy, innocent, never wished anything against anybody, and never will. You would never hurt Pill Bug, would you? I hope not. That would be horrible. You should pick on someone your own size! An isopod the size of a human! That might hurt if it was brave enough to walk on you with its pointy feet. Actually, Pill Bug is SO sweet, that wouldn't be enough. Anyone who would wrong Pill Bug should pick on someone many times their size...

(Unless you are, for example, a woodlouse spider. In that case, I am sorry for my earlier apprehension. Please continue to hunt and eat pill bugs. It is what you are meant to do, and what you do best.)

Name: Megonta

Debut: Kid Icarus: Uprising

Imagine a world in which pill bugs are called "enormous sphere bugs". In this world, the following sentence would make perfect sense: Megonta really puts the "enormous sphere" in "enormous sphere bug"! It's probably around 15 feet in height and diameter, far, far larger than the largest isopods we have on Earth (unfortunately).

Megonta is a very neat stylization of a pill bug! Even when its legs are out, its body is already spherical, reflecting the pill bugs' most iconic ability at all times. It's immediately recognizable as a pill bug, and the sphericality also makes it much taller and more imposing. You just know this could roll at you at a moment's notice! And I personally would not survive that.

Megonta's shell, of course, protects it from all attacks! But it CAN be knocked over, exposing its soft underbelly. Sigh. It's always the soft underbelly. You know how video games work, that is its weak point. But look at its face area! We can see the hole that its face and legs tuck into when it fully conglobates (curls up)! Speaking of its face, I like how weird it is. Those appendages look very leg-like, and arhropod mouthparts (as well as antennae) did indeed evolve from legs! Some legs became better and better at moving food inside. Imagine if your teeth could all wiggle around independently, and had Leg ancestry. That's how bugs feel!

Back in the day, I felt like Smash Run in Super Smash Bros. for 3DS had too many Kid Icarus: Uprising enemies. Now, though, I realize that asset reuse is a cool and good thing, and also, of course, that Uprising enemies kind of deserve it for being so awesome and epic. Megonta is in Smash! Not playable, but it appears physically, and attacks, and is fought. I am technically not lying when I say "a pill bug is a fighter in Super Smash Bros. for Nintendo 3DS".

Did you know that "pill bug" refers to a specific family of land isopods? It's called Armadillidiidae! Armadillidiidae are the best at conglobating, able to even get their antennae enclosed within the shell. They are not to be confused with another family that is a bit less good at conglobation. This family is called... Armadillidae! So be careful. Don't mix up Armadillidae and Armadillidiidae at the isopod family reunion! That would be embarrassing.

It's so silly that they're named after armadillos. Isopods were here and conglobating first! It should be the other way around, if anything! But here we are, and it is so funny. There's a genus within Armadillidae just called Armadillo. So now actual armadillos can't use their ideal genus name, because a bug got to it first. If you reading this ever get to decide the name of an armadillo genus, please consider Isopod. It would be so funny. Keep this in mind in case that happens.

[slyvester101]

Tucker but he actually has some fucking character growth after his time as a diplomat with his son (inspired/based on the fic Lazarus Left the Tomb by Illusion_of_Sea_Axes on ao3 that I recommend reading even though it is not finished oh my god it is so good go read it)

Tucker but he learns how to use his sword since his diplomacy requires him to CONSTANTLY INTERACT WITH THE PEOPLE WHO MADE IT so as perks, the Sangheilios who like him teach him how to use it. Downside, he has to use it a lot since hostile Sangheilios are constantly trying to kill him and his son. Perk, Tucker gets really, really good at using his laser sword.

Tucker splitting from Junior before the desert temple because his kid deserves to have a normal childhood not completely ruined by war and fighting and trauma. (It's so much harder being away from his kid than he ever thought it would be).

Tucker holding his own at the desert temple for MONTHS without reinforcement and getting very good at strategizing, surviving off little, and spends a lot of time self-reflecting about his life (Blood Gulch, Junior, the UNSC, Sangheilios, his horrible flirting habits, how he doesn't want to die covered in sand). He ends up better for it.

Tucker coming to Chorus as a more mature, responsible, and respectful person as well as a skilled soldier. (He doesn't follow Wash's training regimen because a) it's funny to piss off Wash, b) he's pissed that Church left him and is taking it out on Wash and c) he has his own way of training that works much better for him and he despises the way Wash wants him to train.

Tucker joining the New Republic and being an incredible asset to them. His flirting has dialed down to something actually endearing and not fucking harassment and he's actually kind of suave and charismatic. He's kind to recruits and teaches them how he wished he was taught. He gets sent on missions not because he's the best they got, but because he's good at what he does. Felix actually struggling to slow Tucker down/sabotage the New Republic and has to put some actual effort into fighting him both when Tucker is trying to get approval for The Mission and when they have their knife fight at the tower. (Tucker holds back at the tower to get Felix more comfortable into rambling and lets himself lose. Getting stabbed was not part of the plan, but it ended up okay so it's fine.)

Tucker actually being a naturally good fighter and quick learner and a good leader who's genuinely smart and caring but still hides behind some version of a "cool guy" facade because old habits are hard to break.

Tucker doing his best to be the person he needed during his diplomacy, when all he wanted was someone to guide him and give him a plan or give him company when he was all alone in the desert. When all he wanted was protect his kid and make it out of each fight alive with his family still intact.

Tucker doing his best to be that for Chorus.

[deadpool15]

The best

"Hello, we are the feisty, sexy JAM REPUBLIC!!" The yelling always gets me, I sit there smiling while fixing my dress or simply trying to pull it down. When the girls agreed on wearing black, I showed up in pink, trying to represent all both of the national colors. I was then given a blanket as I thanked the staff and placed it on my lap. "We are here to work hard, though I can say I'm excited to see what everyone brings to the table. It's fun because we are the serious judges now." I stated while smiling at my team and holding Audrey's hand. We are then brought the cards, "I have a feeling about some of the other teams. What do you think about it, babes?" She turned around, showing off her little dimples before saying, "I feel like it's gonna be some teams we have seen before and a few mysterious ones, you know."

I agree before adjusting the blanket on my lap and watching our wonderful leader reveal the crew. Of course, when I saw BEBE, I wasn't shocked. Bada and I had been dating for a while, technically before the show started, well, at least in her opinion. She had been trying to get with me way before we got to street women fighter, but I genuinely believed those feelings weren't real. No matter how much she tried to tell me of send me gifts and pick me up from work. I know what you're thinking, "like fuck can you be any more dense." Well in my opinion I've had people work extremely hard for a fuck, I'm talking overtime with no breaks. Though she showed me the real her and we opened up to each other about some tough situations and at that moment I knew I was in love with her. Shit I had been the entire time, and I was simply trying to protect my heart.

Other crews weren't exactly a surprise either, though when 1MILLION added another dancer I was a but surprised, I've seen her dancing style for a while and she was good as fuck. "New scenery, me like it, girls." Latrice laughed at me while hitting my shoulder, with Kirsten giving us the motherly like pointed eye stare, meaning she meant business. Though in this situation I think it just meant to shut the fuck up politely. We saw some other times with Hook coming back and making an appearance, Aiki was a judge last time I saw her, and even though I didn't watch her season, I've heard great things about her. Like Bada, she had her students on her crew, and they showed out. "Still can't believe she is older than us or has a kid." We joked a lot about how the hottest people on set were taken.

Seeing LA CHICA was new as well. As soon as the cameras turned off, Latrice looked at me. "Is it bad I don't know the last crew?" I laughed at that. I mean shit not that funny but funny. "Stop laughing and tell me what they have done." I tried to stop my laughs but ended up laughing harder. "To be honest, the leader is just known for a lot of cultural appropriation in my book." The rest of the girls turned around with Kirsten stated we are in korea, so that's accurate.' We all start to get up and move towards set. We were really the only ones to film the outro since we arrived late. Seeing all the crews stand sit there on their podiums was kinda amazing, mainly knowing we would go up there as well. "Funny how we aren't the ones dancing."

After a while of sitting and the occasional introductions of different crews. We also had the smoke challenge performed by BEBE that awed the crowd. We were finally sitting down, and a few selective girls had already shown their dancing skills. Everything was going well so far. Until some girl thought she could pull a sexy choreography. It was actually sad to watch. "It simply wasn't for me, I felt like it could've had more of a wow factor or just better moves. Everything seemed sloppy, and it didn't fit your persona at all." Everyone looked at me after the harsh criticism, I guess no one expected me to be real. I turned to the side to notice Redlic has been winking at me. Weird. You see, me and her didn't exactly have a friendship. She and Bada were friends due to working together previously on dances as well as classes. In my opinion she was too friendly.

Though, not to Bada but to me. She was always winking and trying to hug me or asking me on dates. Now everyone pretty much knew that me and Bada were a thing except the public per my decision. Bada thought it would be a good idea to show the world our love, and while I was glad she wasn't ashamed of it, I knew the outcomes of it. Now I'm not scared by any means of what the world has to say, shit I came out while working as a dancer for beyonce during a tour to thousands of people. But, those opinions mattered to Bada, and as much as she liked to tell me this and that I knew the truth. Redlic saw this as an opportunity even going as far as stated. If you aren't public, then it doesn't really count. After a while, I realized I spaced out and was brought back to reality when I heard Redlic open her mouth. "I'm sure my sqeet angel Ellie could show you how it's done. She is known for being sexy without trying. I mean, come on, people just look at her."

I sat there shocked while plastering on a fake smile shyly shaking my head to disagree with her statement. But it was too late. She had already convinced half of the crowd, and before I knew it, everyone expected me to dance. I took a look over in my girlfriends direction and saw her face. She was smiling, but I knew that smile. She was anything hut happy. She also looked like she wanted to kick Redlics ass. I guess I was taking too long before I felt a hand reaching over to grab me and pull me to the stage. I looked over and saw Redlic smiling at me, telling the crowd to watch and learn. "So much for not dancing today." I whispered. I heard the music, Beyonce, of course it was. Realizing they had decided to play partition out of all the songs seemed like the world was against me today. Redlic had grabbed my hip, squeezing it while smiling at me. At that moment I knew I was fucked.

We danced together with me, somehow ending up between her legs while smirking st thr camera seductively. Might as well put on a show. If anyone would see us, they would think we were involved or fucking. After we finished, she pulled me closer. It almost looked like we were kissing, so I pushed her away softly and laughed nervously. Seeing the look on Bada's face, let me know I wasn't gonna walk tomorrow. I heard the crowd giving us applauds with Redlic, not trying to let go of my waist, like girl you trying to get me killed in this bitch. After a while, we were called on break. I was scared as shit obviously. I managed to avoid Bada for some time before I was waking down the hall going back to meet uo with the girls after getting a snack, and I saw Lusher. I tried to slowly back away, and she noticed to me. "Bada said she would like to talk to you, unnie, and she said she wouldn't bet on you running because you know. I don't really know what the second part means, but apparently, she said you do so, yea. She is in our crew room, and she seemed pissed so I wouldn't keep her waiting. Plus, you two live together, so don't prolong the war." At times like this, I wish she wasn't so clueless. She was literally leading me to my death.

I sighed and started walking to the direction of the crew room, fuck I can already feel the pain in my legs. As I was trying to give myself a little pep talk I realized I was standing in front of the door. Thinking about it, maybe this was a bad idea. Fuck I'm scared. "Get you ass in here, and don't make me repeat myself, little girl." Yearing her voice like that kinda turned me on until I realized she was gonna murder me. I walked into the room, seeing her sit there on the couch man spreading while staring at me with a glare. "You put on quite the show, didn't you? I would say I loved it, but I mean, did I baby? Was a bit confused on why you randomly decided to throw you ass. Wait, let me rephrase that. Throw my ass back against that girl." She motioned me to walk over na di stood between her legs until she pulled me down. "You hear that, my ass. Because you mine, belong to me. All of you are mine. Seems like you forgot, let me remind you then, what do you say, baby?" I nodded mindless to her commands. "Who's the best baby, say it?" I could barely heat her when she started to grind me against her lap. "Say it pretty." I managed to mutter it out finally. "You're the best, baby. Only you. Always you."

(Request by @pinksults)

[olsenmyolsen]

Vampire Things

master list

dark master list

MCU AU (Vampire Reader X Wanda Maximoff)

Sudo-sequel to Feeling Used

Summary: You feel at peace with the Avengers thanks to Wanda Maximoff. But what happens when your feelings run deep for her?

Word Count: 3.1K

Content Warnings: Blood, Mentions of Hydra if you squint

Special thanks to everyone who voted on the poll ❤️

It's been about eight months since Wanda Maximoff, and you became best friends.

What started out as her saving you from a nightmare to watch TV and play twenty questions about your abilities has blossomed into so much more. She's been there for everything. Your training, bad days, and acclimating you to living in the U.S. with help from the others as well.

Natasha rolls her eyes as you and Wanda come running into the kitchen, smiling from ear to ear. "Jesus, you'd think we have children around here." She mumbles to Peter, who looks up from his textbook, a little afraid. "But I- I am a child..." The Seventeen-year-old states, making Natasha lift her head from her phone and look over Peter.

"Hmm, oh yeah."

Without saying another word, The Black Widow gets up and puts her dishes in the sink, walking past the two of you while leaving Peter confused.

You look over to Peter as Wanda focuses on gathering snacks for your movie marathon of Lord of the Rings. Wanda, having never finished them and you having never seen them only made sense. Plus, whatever to get Bucky to shut the hell up about the books. "Don't mind Natasha Peter. She just misses Maria."

Peter looks to you.

"How do you know?" You smile and walk towards the boy. You point to your ears. "Hearing her heartbeat gives it away. She was texting Maria." Peter makes an oh face. "That's kinda cool." Peter decides and gives you a smile.

You smile back and almost laugh when you remember that there was a point when Peter was afraid of you. Being a Vampire isn't exactly the easiest thing to be.

"Be careful, Peter, don't keep filling her ego!"

You playfully roll your eyes when Wanda decides to speak up. "Don't pressure the kid Maximoff!" You yell back to Peter's amusement. The youngling loves being around you and Wanda. He often times feels like a younger brother to the two of you, especially when Pietro gets involved.

You turn around and head back to Wanda, who eyes you and then looks to Peter. "So whatcha doing, Peter?"

"Wanda." You interject, knowing what she's doing. But she ignores you as you round the kitchen island to stand next to her. Peter looks from you to Wanda and swallows his nerves. "Just some homework. Ya- know it's important and all!" The kid begins moving his leg a thousand miles an hour, much to Wanda's delight.

"Oh my god! Quit torturing him."

You send your thoughts to Wanda, who turns to you with an arms full of junk food and candy. Most of which you had never had until Wanda introduced you to them. You decided sour candy was your favorite. Chocolate was Wandas.

"It's just a little funny."

You shake your head at Wanda's actions.

You see, since you and the witch have gotten closer and closer, it's been noticed amongst the other crime fighters you live with. However, no one stupidly had the nerve to say anything except for a teenager dressed in red and blue.

It was innocent, honestly. Peter was joining the Avengers for a Friday night dinner��Gilmore Girls style. When you and Wanda showed up late with messy hair and comfy clothes, no one batted an eye, mainly because they knew you and Wanda had a knack for taking afternoon naps after a mission.

But Peter didn't know that.

So when you and Wanda sat down and apologized for being late, he made a comment along the lines of "at least you two make a cute couple."

Everyone froze, not knowing how to approach the situation until Wanda broke the tension with a giggle—making everyone laugh. Like I said. Everyone laughed except you.

What Peter said only made the feelings you had as of late grow and shrink in a matter of seconds. Your constant battle for whether it was right or wrong to fall for your best friend was now seemingly squashed when Wanda laughed at the idea.

She liked the joke so much she had now used it as a means of playful torture towards the boy.

But your feelings remained.

Since being saved, one person has been by your side.

Most days, you wake up by their side and smile at the thought of them being around forever with you. You look at her as if she was a goddess. You get lost in her eyes and smile when you see her smile. Everything she does, you watch her do with a soft heart-shaped gaze.

You were in love with Wanda Maximoff.

"Detka?"

You hummed and looked over to your best friend. "Yeah?" Wanda looked you over and tilted her head a little worried. "You okay? I called your name multiple times." Wanda's face was filled with worry. "Sorry. Got lost in my head." You made a believable smile and laughed. "Vampire things." You joked at the excuse Pitero uses all the time when he doesn't understand why you do or do not do something a certain way.

Wanda nodded along and smiled as if she believed you. "Alright. Here." She handed you a bag of chips. "Help me." You picked up a few more things and started following Wanda out. The two of you saying bye to a very thankful Peter Parker.

When you got to the elevator, you laughed at the sound of Peters's heartbeat finally slowing down.

Once in Wanda's room, the Sokovian didn't have to pry into your mind to know that something was bothering you.

Maybe bothering wasn't the right word.

But whatever it was, Wanda could tell it was loud in your head.

That's the way things have been for a couple of months now. Wanda would notice how you often you'd fall in and out of your own head. Getting trapped by the loud thoughts, Wanda wouldn't dare to invade. She only went into your head to help you with your nightmares. She even did it more times than you knew of.

So Wanda would wait for you to come to her. But you didn't. And things would go back to normal between the two of you.

But as the two of you sat on the bed, ready to watch Lord of the Rings, Wanda decided to say something.

"Y/N.."

You looked over to your right as Wanda anxiously bit her lip. "What's up?" You cautiously held her left hand. "Is something wrong?" You asked, running your tongue over your pointed fangs. A nervous habit you had yet to break.

When your eyes locked onto hers, not only could you feel your heartbeat rapidly increase. But you could feel the beats of Wanda's as she nervously decided to ask: "Is everything okay?"

Wanda tightly wrapped her fingers around your own. "Yeah... I believe so." You answered without much conviction.

Wanda frowned. "I can tell somethings bothering you." You sighed. "It's fine." You smiled and squeezed Wanda's hand before moving your attention to the black screen of the paused movie.

Wanda knew you were lying.

"Y/N. You can tell me. I promise to listen. You can trust me." She says with a hint of sadness. Almost like she's afraid that you couldn't trust her. "Wanda..." You swallow and look to your left, away from her.

Do you tell her the truth?

You bit your bottom lip, allowing your fangs to stick out and glide along your skin.

If you weren't so in your head, you would've noticed the increase in Wanda's heartbeat and how her skin seemed to heat up under your touch.

"I- I know I can trust you, Wands..." You look back to your best friend with the green eyes of the girl you've fallen for. "It's just... complicated."

"Okay.." Wanda nods. "It's okay. You can tell me."

Wanda doesn't want to give up. Neither of you do when you need each other.

"I know I can tell you. I trust you more than anyone, but-"

"But what?" Wanda interrupts, gripping her hand around yours harder, moving so she's more in front of you. Blocking the movie that will never be played. Her eyes searching yours.

You look back at her and worry if it'll be for the last time.

Wanda's head fills with thoughts of you, and she worries if she's done something wrong.

"Tell me..." Wanda pleads with a whisper.

"Wanda-"

"Tell me!"

"I'm in love with you!"

The second those words fall from your lips, the AI system alerts Wanda's room in the compound that a sudden mission is about to take place—wheels up in 10 minutes.

You stare at the Sokovain's eyes, and they don't give you any indication of what Wanda is feeling. All you know is that it hurts when you feel Wanda loosen her grip on your hand. You swallow and slowly pull away.

You decide not to listen to Wanda's heartbeat and instead distract yourself by preparing for the mission.

You delicately get up from Wanda's bed and make your way to the door, feeling unsure of where the two of you stand. You don't want to look back, but you must when a red mist stops you from leaving.

"Wanda..." Her name comes out in a calm, defeated tone.

Her body sits still, but her face contorts into one of confusion. Her eyes pool with tears above the red glow of her iris. And then... they fade, and the mist dissipates as she looks up at you. "Y/N..."

"Wanda, we don't have to-"

"You love me?" Those three words come out of her cracking throat. You watch a tear fall down her cheek before reacting and moving to sit in front of her.

Wanda watches you approach and take her hands in yours.

"I do. I do love you, Wanda." You want to say more. But you don't know what. Would you say you're sorry for falling for your best friend? Would you tell her that she's the reason you're even still an Avenger?

You don't know. So you leave it at that as Wanda looks at you.

This time, Wanda removes her hand from your hold before slightly raising it. "Ma- May I?" Wanda asks permission to enter your mind. Wanda wants to the extent of your love. She wants to know why or how you fell for her. Because truth be told, Wanda can't believe it. She's never had someone confess to her before.

You trust Wanda with all your heart. So you take her hand and place it above your head. "Go ahead."

Wanda thanks you and closes her eyes as thin red lines of Wanda's magic extend themselves from her as they enter your mind. You're always too sleepy or focused on your panic attack from a nightmare that you've never really felt what it's like for Wanda to enter your mind, but it makes the ends of your lips curl up. It's ticklish.

You watch Wanda smile and laugh at what you assume to be memories between the two of you. You wish you could see exactly what she's looking at in this moment, but you're just happy to be sharing how you see the witch with Wanda herself.

You feel the magic begin to decrease in your mind, and you watch as Wanda's smile grows before she opens her green eyes back to you. Her hand returning to her lap. Wanda opens her mouth but closes it immediately.

"Is... is that really how you see me, detka?" Wanda asks shyly with a tilt of her head. "Every day." You answer. Wanda smiles and gives you her hand to hold. Her thumb rubbing over yours.

"I remember... I remember the first night you came into my room." Wanda smiles, and you look at her confused before thinking she probably saw that memory. "You were nervous and shy." She states the obvious before pausing. "...I love you too, Y/N. I didn't need to look into your mind to know how I feel about you. I just wanted to see how you feel that way about me.."

The last sentence catches you off guard.

"Wanda..." You see another tear fall, and within a second, you are holding Wanda in your arms. Her head is in the crook of your neck. You let her silently cry for a few moments.

When Wanda finally sniffles and pulls away, you move your hands up to her face and hold her. You wipe away the tear tracks and find yourself nervous to be this close to Wanda. You hear a spike in Wanda's heartbeat as your soft hands brush her skin, making you look up from her lips to her eyes.

"Can I?"

"Please," Wanda telepathically replies. You brush over her cheeks one more time before you move into her. Gently and carefully, your lips touch. Wanda feels and tastes better than you ever imagined. Her soft lips push against yours until you both separate.

No additional words are said or unsaid when you and Wanda collide with each other again. This time, the kiss is rougher and more urgent. Wanda loves how you feel and marvels at the way your breath feels on her mouth. She wants more of you, and you want more of her so much so that- "Ow!"

In the blink of an eye, you backed away from Wanda and felt your beating heart break at the sight of Wanda's bleeding lip.

Her hand flew up to her mouth before she looked at you. You who was wearing a horrified look. "Oh my God, Wanda! I'm so sorry!!" Wanda, with wide eyes, looked at the blood on her finger. "Is this from-" Wanda looked up, and you knew what had caused this. You lifted your lip for her to get a look at your right fang.

No longer red.

"I didn't mean to Wands!" You had a sad look as you begged for Wanda to listen to you. But she knew. "It's okay." She licked her lip and felt okay when she didn't wince. "Y/N, I'm fine." You didn't want to hear it, though. "No, Wanda, I hurt you.." Your voice cracked.

This one was one of the many reasons why telling Wanda the truth about your feelings wouldn't be good. You could always hurt her.

Wanda saw you spiraling and getting trapped in your head again. She went to reach out to you but stopped. A light bulb went off above her head. Regardless of what territory you and Wanda were in right now, she could now do what she had wanted to do before.

Wanda leaned over and removed your hands from your face before she pushed you down onto the bed as her lips smashed into yours once again. You tried to stop Wanda, but she knew you would. So, as she laid kiss after kiss on your lips, you found your hands were stopped by a red mist of magic before they could even touch Wanda.

Suddenly you felt very hot.

"Wanda..." You bit back a moan as Wanda lifted herself off of you. "Y/N." She replied with a smile. "You don't hurt me." She said when you didn't answer. You sighed as you looked over Wanda's lip. "But-"

"Y/N, stop," Wanda warned. "Look at me. I'm fine. If we're going to start dating, then this is going to happen."

Wanda was right. Accidents with your pointed teeth were going to happen. Mostly because you were never close enough to anyone like Wanda before. You never had to be friendly or gentle to people if your fangs were going to be involved.

You were made to be a monster, but Wanda never saw you as that.

"And... I kinda liked it." Wanda blushed when you looked into her eyes. "It felt good being... feeling your teeth. Being marked by you."

Your brain crashed.

"Did you like it... the taste of me?" Wanda asked that, on the surface, would appear as an innocent question. But it was burning her on the inside. Wanda needed to know if you felt what she did.

You nodded. "You tasted better than I ever could have imagined.." Your hands found Wanda's face again. Wanda started to lean in. "I only need and want you." Your mouth opened as Wanda closed her eyes, her lips finding your neck-

"Hey guys- Oh my God!"

You pulled back while Wanda pushed the top half of her body off of you as you both turned to see Peter in his Spider-Man suit staring at the two of you. Jaw dropped. "I- I'm sorr- Wait, how long- No! I- Cap said to get you."

Peter continued to stumble and flail over his words until he managed to say: "Quinjet. Downstairs. Now!"

You and Wanda watched Peter leave red in the face. "Well, cats outta the bag," Wanda said, making you laugh. "I never understood that phrase. What cat? Why was it in the bag? It doesn't make sense." Wanda tilted her head before smiling. "The Vampire just said that." Wanda giggled as you rolled your eyes, and even though you were needed for a mission, you and the witch didn't move.

"Wanda, what happens between us now." You rubbed your hands up and down her arms. "Now..." She leaned down to be on top of you again. "Detka, I'd like to be your girlfriend."

"Really?" Wanda laughed at your surprised look. "If you saw how I see you, Y/N, you wouldn't be surprised."

"Maybe later." Wanda nodded and added. "After the mission. But for now." Wanda leaned into you and put her lips next to your ear. "I want you to kiss me." You turned your head to her and placed your lips on Wanda's and her small cut. The pain that came with it morphed into pleasure.

"I want to feel you," Wanda spoke in a whisper when your lips separated. "But-"

"You could never hurt me. I trust you and all your Vampire Things." Wanda's lips curled upward as yours did the same. "Let's save it till after the mission. I can hear Cap making his way here." Wanda groaned, having to get up.

"Fine. But after I have a talk with Spider-Boy, I want to sit down and kiss my girlfriend and watch Lord of the Rings."

"Girlfriend?"

"Girlfriend."

A/N: Enjoy this instead of getting your hearts broken

dividers by @/benkeibear

[clangenrising]

Month 9 - Leaffall

Floodpaw stood up to his full height to peer over the grass. “I hope we see a rogue,” he said, straining his eyes to pick up any cats that might be encroaching on their borders. “I want to try out those new fighting tricks we learned.” Beside him, Barleypaw made an anxious noise in her throat and Sparrowpaw frowned.

“You shouldn’t want to get into a fight, Floodpaw. Good warriors hope for peace.” 

“Who told you that?” Floodpaw snorted, looking at his brother.

“Russetfrond,” Sparrowpaw lifted his head in a way that made Floodpaw want to smack him. Since when had he been such a golden boy?

“We’re warriors,” he countered, “not Peace-iors.” 

“War isn’t glamorous, Floodpaw,” Yarrowshade said, padding up from behind them. “We prepare for war because we have to but we should always try and avoid it when we can.” 

“I guess,” Floodpaw grumbled. Having marked the border up ahead, Goldenstar raised her tail to beckon them to join her and Russetfrond. 

“Come on,” said Yarrowshade, “we don’t want to get too far from the others.” 

“Okay!” Sparrowpaw smiled, bounding after his mentor. Floodpaw rolled his eyes and followed at a more casual pace. Yarrowshade curled his tail over Barleypaw’s back as they went and she leaned against his leg, purring lightly. 

She had told Floodpaw how much she liked having Yarrowshade as a mentor but Floodpaw didn’t get it. All they did was hunt all day and he was always being goofy and wrong and stuff. Floodpaw was glad she was happy but even more glad that Yarrowshade wasn’t his mentor. He’d hoped, on their ceremony day, that Russetfrond would be his mentor, and while he still looked up to the big ginger a lot, he had realized that Russetfrond was really strict. Sparrowpaw didn’t mind - he was always talking about how happy he was to check the elders for ticks or clean out the dens - but Floodpaw was again grateful that he didn’t have to put up with so many chores and exercises. 

In his opinion, Goldenstar was the best mentor he could have been given. She was smart, funny, and knew a lot about fighting. When they would train together, she was always really good about showing him how to do things without making him feel stupid like Russetfrond sometimes did, and she was a lot more easy going when it came to his chores. Yeah, Floodpaw was pretty sure he was the luckiest cat in the Clan, maybe the world.

The only thing that would make him even luckier is if he got to have a battle with a real live rogue. 

“Come on,” Goldenstar said when they approached, “We’ve got a lot of border to cover.” 

“Goldenstar,” asked Floodpaw, “do you think we’ll see any rogues today?”

“Let’s hope not,” she laughed, ears pressing back a bit. 

“But why though?” he frowned. “Shouldn’t we want to show them they can’t mess with our territory?” 

“Sure,” she said, leading the way through the fields of dry, dull grass, “But I’d rather do that with a patrol of warriors than three brand new apprentices.” Floodpaw frowned harder.

“Do you not think I’m a good fighter?” he asked. “I thought you said I had a knack for it.” 

“It’s not about knack,” Russetfrond said gruffly, “it’s about experience. No matter how talented you are, a cat with more experience will best you in a fight.” 

“You don’t know that,” Floodpaw retorted. 

“I do, actually,” Russetfrond growled. 

“Trust us, kid,” Goldenstar smiled. “You’ve got a long way to go.” Floodpaw glowered, hunching his shoulders, and stomped along behind them. 

“What would we do if we did run into rogues?” Sparrowpaw asked brightly.

“Good question,” said Goldenstar. “Russetfrond, Yarrowshade, and I would handle it while you went back to camp for help.” 

“Really?” Floodpaw griped, “Wouldn’t it be better if only one of us went for help and the others stayed to fight?” 

“Maybe,” Yarrowshade shrugged, “but it’s more important that all of you stay safe.” 

“And even more important that you listen and do what you’re told,” Russetfrond growled, causing Yarrowshade to side eye him. “There’s no time to argue in a fight. You listen to your mentor and that’s that.” 

“Ugh,” Floodpaw groaned.

“Watch your tone,” snapped Russetfrond.

Goldenstar flicked her tail and said, “Alright, ease up, Russetfrond.” The warrior grumbled to himself but said nothing else and Floodpaw smirked, raising his head triumphantly. He loved that his mentor could tell anyone to leave him alone and they had to listen. 

The rest of the patrol was dull and monotonous. They stopped every few meters to mark the border with their scent and Goldenstar took the time to show them how to know what scents were theirs and which scents belonged to other Clans. At one point, Yarrowshade stopped to show them a ground squirrel burrow. Barleypaw was enthralled by it but Floodpaw just kept hoping a gang of rogues would spring out of the grass and surprise them. 

Eventually, they neared the Thunderpath, and the group fell silent, intent on listening and watching for threats. The tension in the air was palpable. It was kind of frightening to Floodpaw to see the adults acting so seriously, but also exciting. Every time they paused to mark a border, one of the adults stood up tall to keep watch on rotation. Floodpaw tried to join them, perking his big ears towards the city, but he was still too small to comfortably see over the grass.

At one point, Russetfrond bent to check a scent marker and his lip curled in a snarl. “Goldie,” he said sharply, “Strangers.” Goldenstar, who had been on watch, glanced at Yarrowshade and he took her place so she could inspect the strange scent. Floodpaw leaned closer to catch a smell of it too. It was acrid and thick, stinging his nose and clinging to the roof of his mouth like an unwelcome guest. 

“Eugh,” he muttered, pulling away. Goldenstar trailed the scent a bit, following it back and forth where it crossed the border, before standing up tall, jaw set grimly.

“A few cats,” she said, “They went deeper into the territory.” Lifting her head, she looked after the scent trail with a frown. 

“Should we run back to camp?” Barleypaw asked, voice soft with fright. Goldenstar considered it with a thoughtful hum. Floodpaw followed her gaze, marking the angle the trespassers had been going and comparing that to the angle they would have to follow back to camp. If the path followed a straight line, they shouldn’t run into each other.

“Yeah, I think so,” Goldenstar said, glancing between Russetfrond and Yarrowshade. Both toms nodded, resolute in what needed to be done. Floodpaw’s heart sank. 

“Go quickly but quietly,” she continued. “Find Nightfrost and follow her instructions.” 

“I should go with you guys,” Floodpaw said, stepping forward. “Sparrowpaw and Barleypaw can handle delivering a message by themselves, I’ll help you guys find the-” 

“No,” Goldenstar interrupted firmly and Floodpaw recoiled. This was the first time she had outright told him no like that. He didn’t like it.

“There’s no time for arguing,” Russetfrond said again. “Get going.”

“This is important,” added Yarrowshade. “It might not feel like it, but we need you to do this for us.”

Goldenstar nodded, putting on a smile that felt far too condescending. “We’re counting on you three.” 

“Come on,” Sparrowpaw grinned determinedly. “Let’s go get Nightfrost!” Barleypaw nodded with a small affirmative grunt. Floodpaw, still staring at Goldenstar, realized there was nothing he could do, and lowered his head with a sigh.

“Fine.” 

The three of them took off, slinking through the grass with Sparrowpaw in the lead, winding their way over the hills towards camp. The route was clear and easy and they made good time, but Floodpaw couldn’t help but look back over his shoulder every so often.

He sighed again, absolutely dejected. “I can’t believe they’re gonna fight rogues and we don’t get to be there.” 

“I don’t want to be there!” Barleypaw squeaked. “If they think it’s too dangerous we should trust them!”

“You’re just a coward,” he huffed. 

“A-am not!” she protested weakly. 

“Are too!” he pushed back. “What good are your stupid ‘magic feathers’ if you get scared of everything anyway?” 

“Hey!” she cried, clearly hurt, and Floodpaw knew he was going to feel bad later. 

“Stop it,” Sparrowpaw glared at him. “A good warrior follows his leader. This is important training. Besides, you’re too mean to Barleypaw.” 

“Am not!” Floodpaw hissed. 

“You are!” insisted Sparrowpaw. “You shouldn’t be so hard on your Clanmates. We should be helping each other!”

“Exactly!” Floodpaw cried, “That’s why we should be helping Goldenstar instead of running back to camp with our tails between our legs!” 

“We are helping!” groaned Sparrowpaw. 

“Guys, we’re supposed to be quiet,” whined Barleypaw. 

“You’re just scared they’ll find us,” Floodpaw growled. “But not me! I hope they find us! I can’t wait to tear their stupid ears off.” 

“What do we have here?” a voice ahead of them and to the east caused all three apprentices to skid to a halt. Floodpaw felt his gut twist in shame. They’d been so busy arguing they hadn’t been paying attention to their surroundings. 

Stepping out of the grass was a sable pelted tom with a perfectly notched ear, like Aldertail’s. He had a plethora of scars, especially over his muzzle, including one that ran over one of his dark blue eyes. Behind him, two more cats emerged. The first was a white she-cat with speckled ears and a gloomy look in her crusty green eyes and the second was a thin blue and white she-cat with copper eyes that darted here and there anxiously. Both of them had matching ear notches - city cats.

“I told you I heard something!” chattered the blue one reedily. 

“Quiet, Midge!” the tom snapped at her, causing her to shrink back into a trembling ball. Floodpaw felt Barleypaw press tightly against him, shaking herself. He did his best to square his shoulders and look unintimidated.

“They’re kits,” the white one said dully. 

“No we’re not!” Floodpaw said, and the tom’s eyes snapped to him in a way that made his stomach squirm like a pinned mouse. Despite that, he continued. “We’re warrior apprentices and we’re not afraid of you!” 

“Oh, ho, ho,” the tom chuckled wryly, “they’re warrior apprentices.” 

“Ohhh,” the blue one laughed nervously, eyes on the tom.

“Only apprentices?” the white one asked. “So not real warriors then.” 

“Maybe,” Floodpaw puffed his chest up, “but we’re still stronger than you are!”

Sparrowpaw shifted worriedly and hissed, “Shut up!” under his breath. 

“He’s got spunk!” the tom sneered, starting to circle the apprentices. Barleypaw flattened herself against the ground and Floodpaw stood as tall as he could, turning to face the tom as he went. Meanwhile, Sparrowpaw crouched lowly, watching the other cats while Floodpaw’s back was turned on them. The tom grinned at Floodpaw, tilting his head as he continued, “I wonder what the Folk would think of him?” 

“Focus, Van Pelt,” growled the white cat, and his smile turned to a snarling glare in a split second as he turned his gaze on her. 

“Watch it, bitch,” he hissed, pelt prickling. “Ghost put me in charge, remember?” 

“Ghost?” Sparrowpaw breathed in shock.

The white cat rolled her eyes, unphased, and said, “We’re looking for a cat who came this way a few days ago, a brown spotted tabby with a notched ear.” She gestured to her own ear with a paw. 

“Yeah,” the tom said, grinning again, “you kiddies wouldn’t happen to know where she is, would you?” 

“No,” Sparrowpaw said carefully, and Floodpaw nodded in agreement. 

“We’ve never seen her in our lives,” he added.

“Really?” The tom circled closer and Floodpaw stumbled over Barleypaw in his attempt to keep turning with him. The tom took the opportunity to lunge forward, teeth snapping, and Barleypaw screamed, Floodpaw toppling over her as he tried to pull backwards. The tom laughed, a harsh and ugly laugh that Floodpaw had never heard before and hoped he never heard again. He hurried to his feet again, dread creeping through his pelt. 

“Stop it!” Sparrowpaw cried, his fluffy coat bushing up.

“Stop it,” mocked the tom in a whiny voice. Looking back to his companions, he asked, “Aren’t they just the cutest?” 

“They don’t know where she is,” fretted the blue one, “let’s just leave them and move on, ‘kay?” 

“I’m inclined to agree,” the white one droned. “We’re wasting our time here.” 

“I dunno…” drawled the tom with a shrug, “I think they know more than they’re letting on.” He stepped in to loom over them, back arching aggressively. “Maybe a good swipe or two might jog their memory.” 

Floodpaw raised himself up on his tiptoes to be as big as he possibly could, spitting with what he hoped was enough ferocity to give the tom some pause. “Touch us and I’ll tear your ugly pelt off!” he hissed. 

The tom shook his head with a sneer, then snapped, “You need to learn some manners, kid!” punctuating the word with a swipe that staggered Floodpaw and left him reeling. A hot droplet of blood started to well up from a small knick in Floodpaw’s cheek. Barleypaw screamed again and the tom rounded on her, snarling, “Quiet! You kits have to learn there are consequences to your actions.” 

Fury welled up inside Floodpaw and he shoved himself to his feet. “Leave her alone!” he shouted and leapt at the tom like Goldenstar had taught him. His claws found purchase in the tom’s thick, grimy pelt and he cried out in pain, rearing away. Floodpaw pushed his advantage, lashing out at the rogue with quick, sharp strikes. His blood pounded in his ears as every part of him began to sing with the thrill of battle. 

The tom swiped at him a few times, falling back under the torrent of swipes. Distantly, Floodpaw heard the white cat chuckle to herself. The tom snarled at the noise, dug in his heels, and lunged for Floodpaw with his teeth bared. Floodpaw knew he wasn’t fast enough to dodge. Instead, he bunched his muscles and flowed with the movement of the tom’s tackle, using his momentum to flip them both end over end. Twisting and clawing, he yowled, and Sparrowpaw’s eyes lit up.

“Help!” Sparrowpaw cried as loudly as he could. Barleypaw caught on and joined him. “Help! Help!” they wailed. 

The white one frowned and stepped forward. “Enough of that,” she said, but neither of them stopped their shouting. 

Floodpaw and the tom split apart, panting, and the tom hissed over, “Would you shut those kits up already?” 

“What do you think I’m doing?” she snapped back at him. Floodpaw’s tail lashed and he sprang again, catching the tom off guard. Lunging for the throat, he eagerly sank his teeth into the tom, expecting to taste a gush of blood, but found himself holding a fold of loose skin instead. The tom wrapped his paws around Floodpaw and twisted, taking them both to the ground, and sank his own teeth into Floodpaw’s shoulder. Floodpaw yowled in pain and struggled to break free. The pain sobered him up and he felt sudden fear spike through him. Goldenstar had been right. He wasn’t ready. 

“Pipe down right now!” growled the white one, “Or else!” 

“Tad!” keened the blue one, “Company!” Floodpaw heard it too, the sound of paws pounding in their direction. With a furious yowl, Russetfrond burst from the grass and crashed into the tom pinning Floodpaw. His teeth found the brown cat’s unmarked ear and tore, spattering blood over Floodpaw’s face. The tom rolled away in lieu of holding onto Floodpaw, leaving him free to climb to his paws again. Russetfrond roared, bashing the tom over the head with his heavy paws, beating the slight brown tom back with every blow. 

Goldenstar charged out of the grass as well and she and the white she-cat tussled for a moment before breaking apart to glare at each other. Goldenstar’s tail tip twitched threateningly as she bared her teeth at the two female rogues. Yarrowshade followed closely behind, stopping beside Floodpaw to look him over.

“Are you alright?” he asked, licking Floodpaw’s wounded shoulder. 

“I’m great,” Floodpaw smiled, pupils blown wide in excitement. 

“Yarrowshade!” whimpered Barleypaw, hurrying to hide under her mentor’s belly. 

“It’s alright,” he said, “We’ve got you now.” 

Russetfrond and the tom broke apart finally and stopped, glaring at each other. The group came to a temporary standstill, silence hanging heavily in the air. 

“You are not welcome here!” Goldenstar boomed. “This is RisingClan territory and we will not tolerate an attack like this.”

“I knew there were savages out here,” the tom panted with a manic grin, “but I didn’t expect such a brute.” Russetfrond snarled and edged closer, an unspoken warning. 

“Ignore him,” the white cat said, crouching low. “We’re just looking for one of our own who came this way, a spotted tabby named Scrap. If you tell us what you know about her, we’ll be on our way.” 

“You’ll be on your way now,” Goldenstar snarled. “Consider yourself lucky I don’t take what’s left of your ears for harming our apprentices.” 

“Thank you,” the blue one spoke up. “We’re undeserving of such mercy. We’ll leave right away.” She glanced at the other two, urging them to agree with her eyes. The white one nodded and backed away a bit. 

“Yes, thank you for your kindness,” she said guardedly. The tom growled and lashed his tail, casting a spiteful glance at his companions, before he wordlessly stepped away and joined them. 

“Don’t let me catch you in our territory again,” hissed Goldenstar. 

“You won’t,” the white one promised. Something in the tom’s backward glance gave Floodpaw the feeling that wouldn’t be the case. 

Once the group had slunk out of earshot, Goldenstar looked at Russetfrond and said, “Make sure they leave the territory. I’ll send someone to check in with you once we get back to camp.” Russetfrond nodded and headed after them, although not before he gave a sideways glance at Sparrowpaw. The apprentice shrank a bit, looking guilty. 

“Come on,” Goldenstar said to the rest of them, “Let’s go back to camp.” 

“Are we in trouble?” Barleypaw asked from under Yarrowshade, big ears pinned backwards.

“No,” Goldenstar sighed. “In fact, I owe you all an apology. I put you in danger and that’s my fault.”

“It’s okay,” Sparrowpaw said, shaking his head. “We shouldn’t have been arguing so loud in the first place.” 

“Did you see how I fought him?” Floodpaw asked eagerly, moving to keep pace with Goldenstar.

She looked down at him and smiled ruefully. “Yeah, I did. That was very brave of you, Floodpaw.” 

“I didn’t start it, y’know,” he said. “He hit me first.” 

“I’m glad to hear that,” she said genuinely. “It’s good that you know not to start fights you can’t win.” 

“But you guys won,” he grinned, still floating on adrenaline. “That was awesome! You and Russetfrond are so cool!” 

“Thanks, kid,” she chuckled. “Now come on, let’s get your dad to look at your shoulder.

[tobiasdrake]

what do you think of the most important relationship in all of dragonball? I speak, of course, of the world champion Mr. Satan and his pupil, mr. Buu

The entire Satan and Buu plotline is delightful, and it's not without reason that their bromance has become an ever-enduring part of post-Z materials.

Story-wise, this may be the best decision that the Buu arc made.

Toriyama sets this up in advance with the little boy whose blindness Majin Buu heals.

While flying around and slaughtering people for funsies, Buu finds this kid that's not afraid of him because he can't see Buu. He heals the boy's blindness so he can be properly afraid, but the kid is grateful rather than scared.

Buu finds himself enjoying that.

So Buu decides to offer his new friend a little more help, even while he's killing and blowing up everything else.

This moment demonstrates that Buu has a capacity for kindness; He just hasn't learned better. Like a child, he craves attention and validation from others but doesn't know the difference between negative attention and positive attention.

He's acting out because he wants to be noticed. Which brings us to the Earth's response.

The man who defeated Cell is here to slay Majin Buu and restore order to the world! Hail Satan!

He's fucked. He is so unbelievably fucked. Even he knows how fucked he is.

To his credit, Satan doesn't run for the hills as soon as these two guys leave. He actually did come here with the intent to confront Majin Buu and save the world.

Satan is often taken for a full-on coward because he does typically try to get out of fighting people who could end him in a flick of a finger. He's Pamput tier as a fighter and he knows these people outclass him by an unbelievable margin.

But I think it speaks very highly of him that when the world looked to him to save them from Majin Buu, he didn't try to run from it. He's not going to try and fistfight Buu, hell to the no, but he does make a good faith attempt to slay the dragon, to the best of his meager ability.

Hell, when all else fails, he even does try to fight Majin Buu directly.

It takes a lot of nerve to swing on an invincible god-killing monster who will absolutely turn you into candy and eat you the moment this conversation stops being fun for him.

This isn't cowardice. Satan's an arrogant blowhard who steals glory he doesn't deserve. As he and Buu settle into their friendship, he even makes plans to steal glory for Buu's defeat should it ever come to pass.

But he does want to save the world from Buu. He just has no idea how to do it. This is so far beyond him it's not even funny. Even after he basically moves in with Buu, he's still got victory on his mind.

He's here for the same reason he went to the Cell Games. Satan has the spirit of a hero somewhere under all that bluster, deceit, and glory hogging.

It's the arrival of Bee that changes everything.

This is the blind boy with the milk all over again. But this time Satan is here to see it, and it changes his approach to how he's engaging Majin Buu.

Once Satan sees this nicer side of Majin Buu, he finds himself armed with the greatest secret weapon he could possibly bring to this conflict. More powerful than bombs or poisoned chocolate. The one weapon that can truly defeat Buu: Empathy and understanding another person's point of view.

BOOM. It's done. Mr. Satan just saved the entire fucking planet from Majin Buu. His ultimate technique is asking Buu nicely to stop. No one's ever said this to him before. He didn't know better.

And this comes at the worst possible fucking time, oh my god. Seconds after Majin Buu agrees he won't kill or destroy anymore, snipers shoot his puppy.

This wouldn't be a big deal ordinarily. Buu would just erase these two assholes. But he just promised he wouldn't kill and destroy anymore. He wants to keep his promise. So all he can do is stand there and fume.

Buu has no idea what to do in this situation if he's not allowed to kill these two shitheads. Satan has not thought to convey the correct nuance for how he can behave in this context. So he's trying so hard to keep his promise in a situation where he should rightly be allowed to defend himself and his friends.

Satan's able to defuse the situation by beating the shit out of these clowns himself, and they save Bee's life with Buu's healing. But when Shooty McDickface shoots Satan in the back, Buu fucking erupts.

The contradiction between his promise not to hurt humans anymore and his furious need to waste these bastards is too much for him, allowing the darker aspects of the true Majin Buu an opening to seize control over Daikaioshin's innocence, which had up to this point resulted in this childish demeanor of his and made this friendship possible.

It's noteworthy that the first thing Evil Buu does is resolve the contradiction.

He does not care what he promised Satan. He's going to kill. And then he's going to resume killing. It was a mistake to have ever stopped.

The other really noteworthy thing, after he becomes Super Buu, is his behavior during his Human Extinction Attack.

God, what a horrifying image. This is the darkest fucking moment in Dragon Ball history. This is somehow worse than blowing up the planet. It's so horrific. Buu is really living up to his function as a god-killing horror whose very existence is a slight against the heavens.

Super Buu uses God's Temple in Heaven as a vantage point from which to fire billions of homing shots down into the Earth precisely targeted to kill every last human being remaining in the world. In a matter of minutes, he purges all human life from this world.

All human life except Tenshinhan and Chiaotzu, who were able to evade the shots aimed at them. Look, if you're going to shoot billions of ki blasts at once, there's a limit to how powerful they can be.

And Mr. Satan, who Buu skipped. Even with his innocence restrained and chained inside of him, Buu still can't escape his feelings for the one man in all the world he can call a friend. Even in this moment as he purges life from this world, Buu simply couldn't bring himself to do it. Not this one.

Even at his darkest, Buu's love for his friend will remain so long as any scrap of influence from Daikaioshin, so long as the thing that makes him sapient to begin with, still lives inside of him. A problem that only Pure Buu would ever manage to solve.

"The surge of emotion that shot through me when I saved your life taught me a valuable lesson: Where Caroline lives in my brain. Goodbye, Caroline." ~Majin Buu apparently

Such a weird resolution to their developing friendship, but Majin Buu is a magical creature unbound from any physics whatsoever so it works.

And then, for good measure, Satan legit saved the Earth from Majin Buu for real by convincing the totality of the resurrected Earthlings to contribute as much genki as they could muster to Goku's Genki-Dama, because there are genuine advantages to being a publicity hound.

Mr. Satan's greatest martial art is PR. He may be a glory-stealing publicity shill sitting pretty off the achievements of others, but goddamn is he good at getting his face out there and being a household name.

People underestimate the value of PR. He might just be a figurehead, but he's a damn good figurehead.

And he got to keep his new bestie too.

This is so unexpectedly sweet. Satan's relationship with Buu was the highlight of this arc. It gave a lot of depth and personality to both characters, turning Satan from a funny joke at the Cell Games to a powerhouse MVP of a protagonist.

It's just. Y'know. Shame about his daughter who basically drops off the face of the plot never to be cared about again. Videl's basically a cameo now, existing mainly to be the mechanism by which Gohan has a daughter.

So. Y'know. That sucks. But I've already talked about Videl and how screwed she was by the narrative.

Looking at post-Z materials, however, you can feel how much of an "Endgame, we don't have to go anywhere with this" sort of thing Satan and Buu's friendship is. GT basically wrote Mr. Buu out of the plot by having him fuse with Uub, while DBS goes out of its way to not let him participate in anything. The one arc he's featured in replaces him with Daikaioshin directly.

I don't think anyone really knows what to do with Mr. Buu now that he's one of the gang. Instead of writing plots and thinking about, "What can Buu do to contribute to this?" the vibe is always "Oh fuck me, what are we going to do about Buu?"

But even when the writers are struggling to find something for him to do, his ironclad friendship with Satan never wavers.

[kacievvbbbb]

I feel like I need to know more about Todo and Yuki’s relationship as mentor and mentee. Like they seem the same flavor of person which is very different from what gojo and megumi have going on.

But also Yuki is very adoptive “dad” coded in the way geto’s relationship to the twins is very adoptive “mom” coded.

In that Geto seems to take on primarily a caretaker role than a mentor while Yuki is more a trainer and life coach than she is a caretaker. Which is something you don’t really see given to female characters in anime.

Like Todo lives by her words and fights by her example. Everything he knows about jujutsu she taught him and Todo’s a very skilled and violent fighter and that reflects back perfectly on Yuki’s own fighting style. It’s so very anime mentor it’s insane she is just introduced to us as Todo (this absolute menace’s) teacher before anything else. I’ve never actually seen a female anime character be introduced this way.

in contrast to Geto who serves as the caring parent who was tragically taken from the girls violently and too soon and the girls wish to honor him and live how he would have wanted them too despite the ungodly situation they find themselves in. Which is such a stereotypical anime mom trope it’s almost funny. He even fits in with the still very much in love with and still speaks highly of the father that abandoned the family in hopes that the kid will one day understand and forgive them. He is essentially the mom from Full Metal Alchemist.

Gege that fucking deranged cat actually flipped the script on us and it’s so interesting which is why it’s so frustrating how little we actually end up getting off yuki when all her little scenes point to such an interestnn in character.

She is introduced as one half of a crazy dynamic that we never actually get to see put to screen and that’s such a shame. Because Yuki is such a welcome addition to the tropes of female characters we need more female “dads”

[team7-headquarter]

Thinking again about how Sakura and Tsunade are depicted as violent women for comedy relief purposes and how much it links to their value as people in the war setting of Naruto.

Let's start with the obvious: In Naruto, the more capable of violence an individual is, the more the shinobi system finds them valuable.

That's because they are always at war or waiting to be at war. They need to be a threat in order to be respected and in consequences, defenseless people can't speak without someone with great power or influence willing to back them up.

The Land of the Waves is the perfect example.

Now, it's very important to say that comedy relief moments in Naruto aren't meant to be taken all seriously. They tell us about the characters and their dynamics, but "women beats men" is a trope that most of the time is meant to be taken as a sort of compliment for the female characters of Naruto. It means they are strong and won't take any bullshit, that they are assertive, have a strong personality and generally they are great fighters.

I'm not defending the trope. I don't like the trope myself, but it is what it is.

This sort of "masculinization" of the women of a story is common for older media. "She's not like the other girls!", "she was raised with 5 brothers, so she's very tough!", "she does (insert activity that is associated with the male stereotype) so she worries no man will ever find her feminine enough to date her", blah blah blah.

It is followed by the author stating that they are still very much women, capable of being wanted and being feminine— you know the rest.

Those characters are always overcompensating for some vulnerability of their past. They were or felt like helpless little girls at some point, so they decided to grow strong to prevent anyone from hurting them or their loved ones again.

It doesn't matter if their natural positions should have given them some advantage. They were kids and more than that, they were women. It's a given that they were going to be discredited.

In Tsunade's case, she was the granddaughter of the two Hokages, a student of the third one, she was a Senju, a promising medic nin. Yet, it took Dan to speak for her for other shinobis to take seriously her proposal of assigning a medic nin to each team, at least until the war was over.

Tsunade innovated the way wars were fought. It is a fact. What needs to be said about medic nins in times of war is that their services will always work in favor of violence. They save soldiers so they can keep fighting, right? To have the best medic nins on your side makes your tropes terrifying to other countries, 'cause yours would not stay down for long. They would die less, get less sick, it'd be harder to take them down.

Tsunade's first vulnerable moment was when her little brother (Nawaki) died. That's her first time really feeling like a helpless little child. Orochimaru was a strong punch to the gut too, but nothing as bad as losing Dan. She convinced herself that she had put a curse on them by accident and isolated herself.

You remember what she's famous for?

Her beauty, her temperament and her skills.

She's pretty, but don't play with her because she will punch your guts to a new galaxy if you dare.

And that's the joke. Haha, this woman won't let you fool around or disrespect her. She doesn't like feeling like she's being dismissed. In many of the comedy relief situations, Tsunade is punching someone (Jiraiya, Naruto) for being inappropriate when talking to women or existing around women

So it's interesting to think how those scenes were supposed to show the audience that Tsunade was strong and capable and worthy of respect. Look, she is dangerous so it's better not to interrupt her while she's speaking or do not underestimate her for being a women

It was explicitly stated in her fight with Madara, where he called her a weak woman. No comedy there.

Now, those funny-violence gags are not reserved for women. We saw Naruto punch people too because he thought they were being unserious.

I think the real problem comes with the fact that such comedy was maximized with Sakura Haruno

Sakura is the original helpless little girl. Before any other female character, we were presented with a too smart for her own good brat with anger issues who based all her worth on how well she could compete on the social scenario of teenage girls.

In order to understand Sakura, we need to place her side by side with Naruto. They are the hero and the heroine of the manga. They were the first male and female characters we saw being bullied. They were both loud and annoying. None of them thought before speaking or considering how their actions could hurt others. They blindly thought they knew what they wanted, who they liked and who they hated. They had their rivals/best friends and that feeling of not belonging, of always being invisible, of being ignored. Naruto accumulated rage appeared in the form of Kurama, but Sakura had that inner version of herself.

All I'm saying is that Sakura is full of issues and insecurities. Her normal life didn't save her from it, despite what other characters could think.

What was Sakura's arc through Naruto Classic? Do you remember? It was her learning that being shinobis was not a game and that she needed to become dangerous if she wanted to be and do anything in that world of hers. It was not enough to memorize concepts, because applying that knowledge in the safety of a classroom was very different from actually fighting for her life.

Sakura spoke mostly through Naruto back in their genin days. We know she impressed Ibiki Morino with her intelligence and Kakashi gave her some high praise during the Chunning Exams. Those comedy relief was meant to show us that she had the potential, but she needed to learn first.

Turning her into a new version of Tsunade was Kishimoto's way of complimenting her. He gave her the beauty, the strength and the skills. Most importantly, Kishimoto gave Sakura the means to make people shut up and listen to her. There is a reason to consider her within the narrative that doesn't extend to her value to other characters (aka how much team 7 cared about her).

What another example? Think of Temari or Chiyo or Kushina. They are all accomplished kunoichis with attitude and a mean punch.

The contrary is the stereotype of quiet girls who are either made fun of for being weird or get discredited for not being the "violent" type.

[oneatlatime]

Appa's Lost Days

Dare I hope?

You know, if ten year old me had turned on my TV to watch my weekly dose of Avatar and been greeted with a nearly two minute long uninterrupted sequence of a frightened and distressed animal being mistreated, that TV would have turned right back off again.

I don't buy that a ten tonne bison who has the leverage of his own weight as well as his airbending abilities would succumb to so few people.

Name one other character that Avatar has presented as so thoroughly without any redeeming characteristics. Even Zhao was at least kind of funny. Everything about the chucklehead on the left is rotten to the core. "What's your dad going to do when he finds out we broke his stuff while doing crime?" "Nothing. It's not his stuff; it's previous crime."

I thought beetle-headed was a commentary on their intelligence, but it's actually a description.

I'm rapidly coming to the conclusion that I should have waited to get my hopes up until I came to an episode called Appa's Found Days. Is this whole thing going to be a series of near misses with the Gaang?

You know, if I had a nickel for every time an animal companion on this show has been threatened with a trip to the butcher's, I'd have two nickels. In the space of two episodes.

This is not fun to watch guys.

Not if I break you first asshole.

The way this Nurse Ratched type circus guy says "earn it" is chilling.

Of course the Fire Nation would find a way to turn bending into animal abuse. Of course.

a) that cage is way too small b) who knew cabbage suction could be so cute?

Completely unsubtle parallel with the boy here, right down to the complete disregard they show to the threats thrown their way.

Stubborn and wilful are not adjectives I would use to describe Appa this episode, or ever.

Wind buffalo. Wind Buffalo. Really? Was Fart Cow taken?

That's a very relatable facial expression.

That makeup and costume is awful.

Now that's satisfying.

Is the Fire Nation kid voiced by Aang's voice actor?

Nevermind. THAT'S satisfying.

I was right - this episode is Appa always being a step behind the Gaang.

Baby Appas! This almost makes this episode worth it!

It's funny how a single feature can contribute so much to a character's design. Arrowless Aang is just some kid. Let me rephrase that, since such a big part of Aang's character is the fact that he's just some goofy kid. Arrowless Aang is indistinguishable from other kids for the first time this series, because every other time we've seen him on screen he's either the only child airbender with his arrows, or the only airbender left.

Lady monks. Nuns? I don't think I've seen those before.

Appa and Aang share a dreamscape? That could be useful.

There's dumb, there's really dumb, and then there's 'wake a completely asleep and therefore harmless unknown creature with threats of violence' dumb.

Close call for Iroh. Do you think he's suspected that Appa (and presumably the Avatar) haven been in Ba Sing Se this whole time?

Bipedal Appa is strange. A very effective fighter, but strange to look at.

I'm amazed that giant boar thing walked away from that.

And now they're hitting me with an 'Appa's given Up' montage. Someone who works on this show hates me.

*Heroically refrains from ranting about the impracticality of using white fabric for an active warrior's glove.*

"This could be our most important mission yet." Foreshadowing?

Did Suki and Appa actually meet at any point in the Warriors of Kyoshi episode?

Turns out 'Aang' is a magic word.

Appa kisses!

Appa is apparently legally banned from having anything good for more than five minutes. Although it's good writing that they're using a previously established weakness - Appa's shedding - to bring the danger ladies back in.

I guess they have Azula drop the line about her brother to remind the audience of who she is, but surely Suki's like "Who are you? Who's your brother? Why should I care?"

Azula going after the Kyoshi warriors is completely unnecessary right? The Avatar isn't there. Neither are Zuko and Iroh. It doesn't even net her Appa. She's just looking for someone to beat up.

WOW this is bad writing. Like really bad. My Immortal levels of bad.

Would it be too much to ask for the Kyoshi warriors to do even slightly ok against the Azula ladies? Couldn't they at least get a couple of hits in?

Kudos to Suki for essentially sacrificing herself and her warriors to save Appa. 'Most important mission yet' was a bit on the nose.

Out of options, Appa goes home. Ouch.

Someone explain this to me. Air Bison teething ring?

My what a human sounding cough you have buddy.

This is why you don't use Air Bison as guard dogs.

I like what this Guru is saying. Fear displacing trust but not love feels more accurate than how I usually see the consequences of trauma discussed.

The music playing throughout this sequence fits so well. I think it's some sort of metal thing you hit - I want to say a variation on tubular bells, and maybe something Glockenspiel adjacent? It's unlike anything I've heard in this show before and it fits so well that I'm nerding out a bit.

Disney princess Guru. Aang has Disney princess moments too. Maybe it's an Air Nomad thing?

No wonder the monks built a temple here. Even destroyed, it's gorgeous.

And Appa decides to trust again. I love it when an animal visibly comes to a decision about your trustworthiness.

This energy reading stuff makes sense given that Aang and Appa already share a dreamscape.

He IS a great beast. The best!

OH COME ON

Someone whip up a wanted poster for Long Feng: Cattle Rustler. It had also never occurred to me that he was an earthbender.

That flip move with the earthbending platform must have caused Appa to land on his back. I bet that hurt.

One of the times I am very grateful that the closing credits music is so upbeat.

Final Thoughts

@aboutiroh I see why you recommended I save my chocolate for this episode.

The Tale of Momo was really just a preparatory taste of things to come, huh? Almost a microcosm of this episode.

This is the first episode where I had to take breaks while watching. Especially the circus sequence, I think I got up twice to do things like get a cup of tea and stare randomly out windows at squirrels. I didn't even have to do that with Zuko Alone, despite freaking out a lot about it, because at least that episode took breaks from the child abuse to check in with Aang being miserable. This episode was unrelenting.

If I had seen this episode when I was the age of the target audience, this may well have turned me off the show for good. If my Mom had seen this episode, I would have been banned from watching the show entirely. Not a decision I'd agree with, but my Mom is the type of person who banned her kids from watching Bambi.

To watch through all of that unrelenting animal (at best) unhappiness, and still not get Appa back at the end of the episode? That's a bit much. It's not often that this show ends its episodes without at least a little bit of something positive.

Once again, the music did a lot of heavy lifting this episode. The animal noises weren't quite as emotive as the ones in Momo's Tale, but Appa's face is more expressive, and more was shown through his expression than through Momo's, so I feel like this episode had just as much non-verbal animal communication as Momo's Tale.

I think I'm renaming season 2 "the Suki redemption arc." I really didn't like the Warriors of Kyoshi episode, and I didn't like what her character did in that episode. But every time Suki appears in season 2? She absolutely nails it.

The show since losing Appa has taken to wallowing. Even with bright spots like the poetry bouncer, the overall tone since Appa's appanapping has been ever more dark. If this keeps up for many more episodes, it will no longer be fun to watch.

Somehow I don't think this one is going on my rewatch list.

[sabrondabrainrot]

☀️🌟☼🔅

Random Idea but with what I know about current spoilers I have two ideas. One is that Sun will somehow becomes the Witherstorm (I AM BANKING ON THIS) or he's going to be relevant to the Witherstorm of their dimension and be scattered through dimensions.

One of my most favorite series of all time is "Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicles" and the crux of that series is they need to put someone back together and to do so, they have to travel to various dimensions to find the missing pieces of the person's soul. I totally see that happening to our Sun? I don't know why.

Even to this day, Sun still hasn't quite opened up about himself. Not to Old Moon, New Moon, Solar, Earth, Lunar, etc etc. I think the most he's been open towards thus far is probably Dazzle ironically?

I'm still getting caught up but I can tell Dazzle actually wants to get to know him so she's asking about him and he's honestly telling her. (also loving how Sun is spending more and more time with the kids in the show, He spends so much time with FC, Dazzle, Jack, etc. It's so wholesome) I'd say Earth and Lunar are in second place of knowing him best but they also still sometimes are kept an arm's length away.

Solution to this? Scatter parts of his 'soul' into the multiverse and make it the family's responsibility to find him! Heck he could even be in a coma the entire time they do this! When they find a Sun fragment they get to see his memories or feel and hear his thoughts.

In Tsubasa the fragments are called 'feathers' and they can warp reality, break time and space, or even gain sentience. I think it'd be so neat if one of the fragments of Sun became Dark Sun but I know it's not likely.

"I am doing this for Sun, Because I am Sun" vibes

Just an Idea but it'd be so cool if it happens!

My second Idea, has to do with a sketch I did a bit ago (still working on more sketches for it) but basically I know Sun's currently gathering power. He's a fighter and wants to help! His family is still keeping him away from the action though. It's not malicious and comes from them wanting to protect him but it's going to ultimately leave him more vulnerable and a target.

Dark Sun I know is tampering with dark energies, he's raising a dragon? He's associating more and more with Witherstorm energy and he still hasn't quite confessed what his motive/plan is besides the fact this is "all for Sun"

So wouldn't this mean Sun is going to ultimately becomes a Witherstorm? It's what the creator studies and the one of the main dimension is different from others so who's to say our Sun and Moon aren't also built different with different fates?

Creator created something specifically just to torture and wear Sun down but when you think of it, that's also what Old Moon was until they split. I don't think that was the intention but the fact Old Moon just decided to point blank torture Sun? Sus, like it was meant to happen.

Dark Sun I think needs Sun to be his pet Witherstorm, and he's maybe planning to use Nexus to make that happen? I just got to the point in the series where he just picked up New Moon from space and took a chip out of his brain. Bruh...he needs him but won't say for what.

I love it. Dark Sun my beloved what are you evil little plans <3

Hoping Sun doesn't fall into a Coma but it'd be so sexy of him aha~

I really like when Sun spends time with Earth and Lunar too it'd be so cool if they have an adventure to save him.

BTW I've been listening to Aurora's song "The Seed" and it literally gave me a big brain AU idea for tsams but idk if I should try to write it.

I really hope Sun ascends to some kind of God-hood like being especially involving destructive energy like Witherstorm stuff. It'd be so neat and sad if one of the nicest people ever became the ultimate judge, jury, and executioner-like being. It's especially ironic since Nexus/New Moon can't decide what's real anymore and just decided to frick off and become God so it'd be realllyyyy funny if Sun was the one to become a reality altering being.

I'm just Madoka-ifying Sun at this point

[fortuna-et-cataclysmos]

Ms. Sans-Culotte and the obvious French Revolution symbolism

This episode is a field day for me, so I'll need to analyse it bit by bit. Let's first start with the obvious and less obvious French Revolution references in this episode. This will be especially obvious for French viewers, but I thought that it may be interesting for others.

Sans-culotte

I know that the term sounds funny to most, but sans-culottes are a key figure in the French history. Those were the commoners who revolted to the King and aristocracy, and undertook the French Revolution of 1789. As Mademoiselle Bustier explains in the beginning of the episode, the sans-culottes were called so because:

Contrary to rich aristocrats, they would wear simple pants.

So when Mlle. Bustier is akumatised, we see the following character design:

THE PANTS. Very obviously the pants. But there are more obvious symbols in this character design.

Marianne

Marianne is the national personification of the French Republic. She is very much synonymous with the free and republican spirit of France. Yes, that's also the name of Master Fu's girlfriend, and for good reason (she was a Résistance fighter during the German occupation of France!).

By the way this exact painting is in the background in the few seconds after Mlle. Bustier is akumatised:

Marianne is usually depicted with the following symbols:

the Phrygian cap

Greco-Roman clothes

Partial nudity

We see these signs in Mlle. Sans Culotte's character design.

Mlle. Sans Culotte's helmet has the unique shape of the Phrygian cap.

2. Mlle. Sans Culotte is dressed in a Greco-Roman armour. The usual depiction of Marianne is in flowy Greco-Roman clothes, but the helmet and armour really add to that fighter spirit of Mlle. Sans Culotte. Also, even though rarer, there are some depictions of Marianne with a Greco-Roman armour.

3. Partial nudity. Obviously they couldn't actually show that on a kids show. However, I think that the character design does hint to a type of nudity. The fact that the white of the French flag covers all of Mlle. Bustier's face and body make it seem like it is not actually her clothes but her skin. And other than the golden armour she wears, she has no other clothes on her.

The Guillotine

Mlle. Sans Culotte's weapon of choice is a freaking guillotine knife. This was a device used by the French revolutionaries to behead their opponents. To this day, it is associated with the violence of the French revolution.

Now to more implicit references:

Ça ira

When Mlle. Sans Culotte hits people, they turn into balloons that chant:

Ça ira, ça ira, ça ira!

Which is a song sang by the sans-culottes during the French Revolution (thanks to @2manyfandoms2count for helping out with this one!)

Other quotes and remarks

There are various quotes throughout the episode with a revolutionary lexicon.

Monarch: The power of Jubilation will help you show the people their dream of freedom, and as such gain partisans/supporters to your cause.

Monarch: To arms, citizens! Form batallions!

This one is especially striking for me, because it is very explicit call to violence (frequently used in French revolutionary history too).

Mlle. Sans Culotte: No one stops the revolution. Long live the revolution!

She quite literally says Vive la révolution. Seriously, it doesn't get any more obvious than that.

She literally runs head-first into a group of policemen, paralleling the Storming of the Bastille on 14 July 1789. And literally afterwards Chat Noir mentions this same event:

Chat Noir: It is not the 14th of July, my Lady. Do you think that this akuma victim wants to celebrate the Bastille Day early?

And later on:

Mlle. Sans Culotte: Ladybug, Chat Noir! Help the sans-culottes (plural!) to liberate Paris from its aristocratic Mayor!

Ladybug: Terror is not the solution!

Chat Noir: To get your voice heard there are the elections!

Ok, the word "terror" here is important. I had previously mentioned in my post on Felix's anarchist revolution that the French Revolution was followed by a period of violence where all those against the revolution were murdered. The name of the period is literally the Reign of Terror. We see that Ladybug's words is a reference to that.

Ladybug: (after receiving her lucky charm) Revolution, sans-culotte, and the Mayor of Paris who acts like the King?

The parallel is there. They're not even trying to be subtle. This is the retelling of the French Revolution.

Except that it doesn't turn out like the French Revolution. In the end, Mr. Bourgeois willingly steps down, Mlle. Sans Culotte rejects Monarch's powers (as in, she drops her weapons), so there is no revolution and no bloody reign of terror.

But still, the power dynamics end up shifting tremendously in the Miraculous Paris. How and why? I'll make a post specifically analysing this. Stay tuned for part two!

(Also, I have likely forgotten or omitted some other symbols, feel free to add them to the comments - if there are enough, I can make an addition to the post :))