#idk I just want explanations this is so weird to me
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ヤッホー !!スナクがきついたよ!°˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°
でも 日本語が少し分かります
ngl my ass had to whip out my old dictionary because I doubt my reading level is a solid N5 when I don't practice as often as I should. also since japanese is my third language so idk, I'm gonna try ok
so! i do rag on and bully these poor turtles a lot but the kanji on them is very like.... gymbro style "fire", "dragon", "strength" type of tattooing or marking oneself. Which does fit considering Bay splinter taught them ninjutsu from a book he found while sweeping the sewers. To me, they're canonical ninjaboos (affectionate).
but usually it's like a motto or a mantra or an oath that's tattooed if ever but that's neither koko nor soko
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starting with Leo's bandana
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So yeah, confirmed for 息子, musuko. more or less. looks like 'musu' is missing a few strokes plus a few misplaced ones. anyway. looks like it was written on with a paint pen. i would think splinter wrote it because it just seems kinda weird for Leo to have written it himself. i don't have the linguistic perspective to describe why it seems weird to just have "son" on his mask. "blue son" would be less weird actually, "beloved son" would work. "upstanding son". but just "son" is like... idk man, ig, they replaced it with a bunch of staples in 2016 so moot
I cannnnnot get a clean shot of his shell kanji the only clear part is 子
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three zero action figure of Out of the Shadows Leonardo
I got this from the figure but even zoomed in I can't make heads or tails of the first kanji, i feel like this puzzle is for someone whose first language is japanese
visually something about the top kanji makes me think about those "fonts" that arbitrarily assign kanji radicals to the english alphabet to "spell" things. at most it looks like whatever kanji it is it has the 勹 radical other than that? a mystery to me
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now for Raph's 憤
which is an example of what I mean by gymbro-style "dragon" or "strength" tattoos in that 憤 is not exactly a word by itself, it's part of a word or I guess concept would be better? either way it's like writing "indig" instead of "indignation"
憤慨 fungai, is "indignation", technically it IS also "anger" in that when you resent someone you're also a little angry at them. Which considering... Raph does a lot of resenting, he resented being benched, he resented not being told about the purple ooze, he resented Leo for disregarding not only his but also Mikey's input.
i guess if you wanted to keep 憤 then 憤激 (fungeki) fury would work?
i think the funniest thing is the font choice for 憤 as it's written on his bandana because it's like a very official for-use-in-textbooks type of font. like the kind of font for government buildings or legal documents.
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tried to find in-movie examples alas, three zero coming in clutch with the clearest details for at least the Out of the Shadows designs. but. looks like another chopping problem where there's 憤 and 怒 which together don't really make a word. although 怒 oko from 怒るokoru which is the "angry" you use when you say things like "I'm angry!" again, both kanji are written with the legal document font which: haha heehee
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獣 confirmed though i'd go so far as to guess he meant for it be "brute" either way it hurts a little because the connotation is like "unthinking beast compared to thinking human", like the whole sort of "the difference between 'animal' and 'man' is like logic/reason/empathy whatever". especially since this is his 2014 design when he was accusing April of taking pictures of the freaks to show her friends
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now for donnie's 明
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i think this is another case of just putting in a piece of a word. 明 by itself is like the phenomenon of something being visually bright and the light we see but i'm guessing they were thinking of trying to put adjectives on them for in-jokey sort of design tells. in that case I would have opted for like 説明 setsumei (explanation) which.... explains itself ba dum tss or i guess on a more serious take 明確 meikaku (precise, clear, definite) which is bay Donnie with his habit of expressing the probability of something happening in percentages down to the like 8th decimal place
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annnd Mikey's 仲
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This one was a little frustrating as the most handwritten looking one. at one point I swore it looked like 5 TH but whether the top mark is a 5 or an S or even a 己 at a stretch. again it seems someone who might have a passing familiarity with how hanzi/kanji works possibly swiped a part because given 仲 I'd have went with 仲間 nakama yes like from One Piece, comrade, the kind you go up to bat for or fight a shark man with a chainsaw for a nose. hell 仲良し nakayoshi the shoujo manga magazine?! good friend/close friend, Mikey can be anyone's nakayoshi and if you're not careful to stay aloof Mikey will instantly consider you nakama.
hoo, yeah, those are my best guesses idk man
Okay nertles, I need Bayverse help on my little investigation and appreciation journey. Today I’m looking into the kanji on the turtle designs, please help me fill in the blanks and correct me!
Leonardo’s shell has a painted 子 for son, and also “ne” sign of the rat in the zodiac (which isn’t just interesting in the Splinter way, but in the way that the ninja turtles were first conceived of in 1983 but published in May of 1984, making the franchise’s “birth year” the year of the Rat). His bandanna tails either say 忍 子 patience and son or just son 息子
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Raphael’s scarification on his right arm, bandanna, and shell are all the same, “憤”indignant/hate, but beneath it on his shell is “怒” which means to get angry (like ok, we get it), and his bandanna appears to say “beast” 獣.
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Donatello’s bandanna tails have bright 明 on them.
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And Michelangelo has this, and I can’t find anyone talking about this at all but it looks like poorly written kanji for naka, go-between/relationship “仲”, which would make so much sense with his being the heart of the group and most socially outgoing.
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I’m so sure there’s more, pretty sure Mike and Don both also have shell paint but I can’t find good screens. Will update this as people add if they do.
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al-luviec · 3 months ago
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something simple to try to get out of art block (it didn't work)
#alek art#ninjago#zane julien#2024#i am very unhappy with this and sooo in order to feel better i am going to talk about him#system zane is very real to me. i always give him six main alters (but i do believe there is more lol)#systems cannot just pick and choose who front depending on the day i am very aware (i am a system) its more on the nose symbolism#the fifth one crossed out is the ice emperor. in canon he exists in zane's mind as an “alter ego” of sorts which is crazy to me#character has canon dissociative episodes... amnesia... and several different “personalities” / identities? sounds familiar idk#i talked a lot about this hc on my long ass zane hc post thanks for the ask btw npderzane#its not an au its just how i see him so just imagine every zane i draw as system zane. ill only specify it in the tags if its system related#that one post thats like. 'being a did system sucks which one of us poured instant coffee in the bathtub!' thats the average zane experience#he wakes up and everyones like “mannn zane you were going crazyyy on prime empire yesterday” and hes like ??? i did not play any video games#and then he looks at the calender and 6 months have passed. semi true story that happened to me#also alters having incredibly different food preferences is funny. zane doesnt eat anything ever vs boone who eats raw meat sometimes#zane having really weird characterization? and its very inconsistent / bad writing uhhh alek explanation is hes a system and nobody can mask#man its 1 pm :|#i hate this drawing so much i dont even want to look at it but it took time so ill post it#i also have another zane drawing in my drafts i should post. from like 2 months ago???
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forcebookish · 2 months ago
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as much as i'd like to see forcebook play their ages, i don't really mind them playing 18-22 year olds because i can easily forgive a lot of shitty behavior in that age group. it's a really rough time in your life, often your first time out on your own, when you might not quite grasp how dire the consequences of your actions can be because you won't "get in trouble." when you're graduating from Teenhood, there's sometimes a learning curve with "my parents ragged on me about X just because they're parents" to "oh they actually did know better i shouldn't do that shit" - sometimes you have to learn that on your own. add alcohol, the pressure of college, shifting identities, etc., it's a good recipe for some nice 'n' easy character development.
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princeofhags · 1 year ago
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I did the thing
#this took me a while trying to DECIDE#oc: iraestra#oc: balam#ot3: he is the tender butcher who showed me the price of flesh is love#and a few of these have weird explanations behind them but balam is horniest most violent sluttiest wants to see insides be their outsides#irae more wants to see their insides to study and put in a little jar on her shelf#but like gort views himself as acting for the good of the gate and the sword coast hence the slightly more selfless leaning here bc this is#about how they view themselves#though in that case irae would probably view herself as very selfless bc she is doing this for her family and revenge in their name#the most baseline explanation of this is that irae is a mykrulite under ketheric but thinks that he is becoming old and ineffectual#and losing himself in his grief and beginning to doubt that he can uphold his end of the dead three pact and there's plans to replace him#and orin finds out about it when she tadpoles balam and iraeis tadpoled as well or somethng. might change that storyline around a little bu#considering irae having a group of myrkulite cultists who answer specifically to her and pay lip service to ketheric or idk sometttthingg#throwing ideas at the wall and seeing what sticks#didn't feel assed trying to draw balam or gort so you get these#also yes that's a leapord gecko not a salamander but we'll ignore that#also unsure how i feel about gort age but i just threw something in there#half the time spent on this was just editing it for 3 people#lamia muses
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girl-bateman · 6 months ago
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it sounds so obvious now, but im pretty sure my physical problems rn can all be traced back to the fact that my brain and body has been in a constant hypervigilance and cortisol overload for 3 months straight. the dizziness, the blackouts, the acne, the constant nausea, the giant eyebags and sudden crows feet ?? Like yeah, no shit thats what happens when ur every waking hour is the equivalent of that camille preaker crying gif
#i know the fact that i faint every couple of days and go a little blind sometimes should be priority here#but it REALLY pisses me off how much and how quickly this (?) stress is aging me#id still like to look good even if i feel like shit. sorry#the worst thing is that im doing everything in my power to do all the right things#but since i dont actually KNOW why having sex affected me in such a weird way. I cant really take the proper steps to get over it#like.. i can treat the symptoms best i can but as far as the root of it all. i have no idea whats actually wrong or how to fix it#in some senses it seems pretty cut and dry- i cant remember my childhood. i was neglected. i have a bunch of issues#i have sex for the first time. i stop functioning. i go into a depressive episode. i cant sleep.eat.be around people#i feel paralyzed by fear at the most random of times and have to hide in a small space to feel safe again. i cry so much i pop an eye vesse#like CLEARLY something is wrong. and just in an objective sense it sounds like something bad happened a long time ago associated with sex#however ! life is more complicated than that and i think its unhelpful to make assumptions (yes im aware i might also be in denial lol)#i already know i have trauma so its not weird for me to exhibit trauma responses. and maybe that was triggered bc i wasnt ready to have sex#it doesnt have to have a sinister explanation. it might just be as simple as me not vibing with the guy and regretting it later#idk. obviously my reaction to it is violently out of proportion. but i might just be a sensitive person !#does that sound silly or reasonable? reading it back i still kinda wonder if its just the denial speaking but idk!#i really really wish i just knew what was wrong so that i could actually start to move on#i know im bumming u guys out talking about it but i cant exactly talk to my family and im trying to not unload everything onto my friends :#bc as supportive and wonderful as they are i can tell they feel bad and have no idea what to say#which is fair enough bc its a really weird situation! so i dont want to burden them more than what i have to for my own sanity#tw#?#diary entries
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nonokoko13 · 1 year ago
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<<DNI if you shame people for having "cringe" interests>> *proceeds to shame or disrespect someone for having interest in fictional stuff they don't like instead of using the block button even though that person has done anything to anyone*
#vent??? I guess??? idk#some people is mind-blowing to me. not in the good sense#idc much about fandom discourse or whatever but the level of blindness or hypocrisy some reach is??#like you see them telling everyone they are supportive and reality ≠ fiction but then make gymnastic levels of stretching to explain why--#--what they like is good 👍 and everything they dislike or they're neutral of shouldn't exist and who enjoy it should kill themselves#and it doesn't even need to be something gross like this time I have seen it is because others like Kuromi more than My Melody dude wtf? 😭#guys is it homophobic to be cishet? Because apparently according to some who support everyone of the collective being cishet is enough to--#get blocked. If it was reversed they would get called out for their weird behaviour but ig I'm the weird one#like. One thing is blocking or putting boundaries because that's what social media is for. Curating your space is normal and it should--#always be#but another thing is opinating [insert sexuality/gender] is 'on thin ice' for just...being on the internet???#Idk what I was expecting from Twitter tbh. Although I see people like that in every social media#so sad and tiring#just say you don't want others to have different takes in whatever fandom you are and go. You don't need to give explanations or aact-#--like you are always objective and therefore correct#Anyway in this house we stan Kuromi and cishet people as long as they don't discriminate anyone for their gender identity or sexuality 👍#If you have read this far I'm sorry. Seems long. Have a nice day 🫶#and if you are wondering no that person didn't do anything to me they were talking about Kuromi/straights in general#but I felt the need to share#tw vent#edit: Seems like they did reach somebody over their interest in fandom stuff. Not surprises there#God forbid people to make their internet experience about their hobbies and interests#instead of curating THEIR OWN BLOG and thinking of what others want them to like instead#just a warning for those who like my shit. Unfortunately for you I like fictional characters being evil or morally grey as much as#fictional characters being good people#sorry guys block me if you want Imma keep using critical thinking 🤷‍♂️#OH AND WHAT UPSETS ME THE MOST: When somebody breaks their own dni to go to somebody to tell them they suck or whatever#like????? Why would you do that if you despise x trope or thing sm???? So you want everyone to respect your boundaries except yourself????#you just waste your own time and those you interact with by trying to create a raging conversation for all parts#fandom discourse
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pandorashearts · 1 year ago
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ok now that the rage is out, actual rational reason for why this pisses me off so much.
if my love & devotion to pandora hearts didn't make it clear enough, my favorite niche of media is alice in wonderland inspired works. if i know something is inspired by aiw, i'm gonna at least look into it automatically. dunno why, honestly. but, it's been like this since i was SUPER young.
that being said, im obviously p versed in alice in wonderland inspired media. i haven't consumed them all, i'm sure there's many i'm unaware of, but. i've consumed enough to confidently assure alice in borderland is the first time i personally have ever seen an alice in wonderland inspired media portray alice as a guy, while still having him be named alice.
and, like! it's honestly SUPER clever to get away with doing this by having alice be ryohei's last name instead of his first. because, obviously, 'alice' is not typically a male name. it can be bc gender is a concept yada yada, but. like. u get what i mean.
so, like. baring that in mind. if somebody who has absolutely zero concept of how japanese pronunciation works stumbled across alice in borderland, & watched w the english subtitles... they'd have no reason to question if 'arisu' is meant to be 'alice'. bc. why would it be? they're expecting 'alice' to be a female character.
& so, like. it honestly rly fucking sucks that this really interesting way of taking the alice in wonderland inspo & portraying its references as it does gets completely sacked & made out as pointless by having alice not be referred to AS alice.
& even more so bc additionally, the white rabbit is a woman in the show. so, we have these two prominent characters from alice in wonderland being swapped. but, like. that doesn't even get to be properly appreciated bc they don't let u know alice IS alice. it genuinely just comes across as 'huh, weird this show named alice in borderland, & that's v clearly inspired by alice in wonderland, has a MALE lead & his name is arisu. weird this aiw inspired media has no alice.'
tbh part of me wonders if that's why they decided to go w that decision. to blatantly erase how silently groundbreaking it is to have an alice in wonderland inspired work where alice is still named alice, but is a guy instead of a girl. the silent way that breaks down gender stereotypes and such. but, nope. that all gets lost.
fucking bullshit.
also yes ik im v stupidly passionate abt this, but again. aiw-inspired works is my FAVORITE niche genre of media ever. my favorite series of all time is literally an aiw-inspired work. ive never seen an aiw-inspired work do this. not saying no others exist, & if they do, pls lmk! but. yeah. it does suck the only example ik of doing this gets stomped by refusing to let alice be named alice.
#mine#i think tsukasa is the only other alice allusion character i can think of that's a guy.#but. like. he doesn't count against my point bc his name isn't alice.#& he's also meant to represent multiple aiw charas. not JUST alice.#so. yeah. this is the only media ik where alice is still named alice & gets to be a guy & they just do not let him stay alice#it's weird & feels lowkey v shitty. for the aforementioned dismantle of how silently groundbreaking that decision is#& how clever it is to get away w it by having it be his last name#esp since obviously. in japan u typically refer to someone as their last name until u know them well.#so. just. HNNNG. bothersome.#it doesnt actually keep me up at night but it does like. bother me. a lot.#idk how that decision even got approved w how much it actually fucks up the viewing experience of a completely#uneducated viewer when it comes to knowing anything abt how japanese words are pronounced but.#tbh the only explanation i can think of for it IS they just didnt want u to know he's alice. bc they're cowards. which is weird but.#idk. literally no other reason to do that. u can't even like. try to claim it's for accuracy sake.#bc it's. literally not accurate. if ur gonna translate the name of the series completely into english. the namesake chara should also#have their name completely translated. to avoid confusion.#UGH OK IM DONE BACK TO ACTUALLY WATCHING AND ROTTING AWAY IM SORRY IM JUST RLY PASSIONATE ABT DUMB SHIT#alice in borderland
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scarletfasinera · 1 year ago
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Anyway since I can't send an ask because of character limit and I gave up after trying to write it three different ways and it not working, I'll just. Idk write a short vague post back? I'm assuming a vague for a vague is fair (don't worry I don't want to be mean I just have no other way of navigating this situation.) Since I'm exhausted & but want to at least express my view of it.
Idk just on the off chance they see this or one of our shared mutuals shows them or something. My "weak subtext" post had absolutely nothing to do with Adam Warlock, I didn't even remember that I reblogged that poll before making my post. I had seen like six other polls after the Adam one, bc I was actively looking through the blog, that did the exact thing my post was about, the blogrunner (who shall remain anonymous) had Pointed Out in private that it was happening and gave several examples & it was distressing them so I checked the blog myself and commented on it, which was why I made the post. Not the Adam poll in particular which I didn't remember and wasn't thinking about. I do not know enough about Adam to say anything about either the text or the subtext or anything, so I just. Wouldn't? It really baffled me that it was read that way.
Anyway. Farewell beloved mutual we barely knew ye...
#txt#the “people doing that across multiple polls” thing was also why I left the “annoying notes” tag#it just happened to be on the Adam poll because I like Miles and it was ine of the first ones on the blog#I didn't even process that people wouldn't have the background context & would read it as being Very Mean to Adam Fans in particular#But honestly I should have & that's on me & I deleted the post for that reason#Anyway I have NO BEEF with Adam fans and don't know enough about him to make any posts about him#It's just VERY STRANGE to me that this happened like I didn't even think about Adam I was just blogging 😭#I wish they had like asked me for clarification or something like I'm a dumbass and oftentimes an asshole by accident.#And I get misinterpreted A LOTTTTT but I never know how to KEEP IT FROM HAPPENING#and idk. I don't like being misinterpreted & I especially don't like being vagued over misinterpretation so I feel weird about it ):#Especially from a mutual that I liked? But. I'll forget about all this in the morning.#I mean I could also just. Reblog their vague and respond to it maybe#But idk I feel like that's a Lot because I don't want to out them to my followers as Having Vagued Me#I just would LIKE to address it privately but the only way to do that is via ask but it would be too long if I'm being serious about it#And tumblr's ask limit is like 500 fucking characters or something. Idk I tried figuring out the character limit andnit cut it off after#the FIRST PART#It would have taken like 7 fucking messages to send the whole explanation#And I don't want to swamp their ask box#The only reason the explanation is so short here is because I wrote it out in an exhausted Whatever tone that clips some of the explanation#short. Which I don't think would go over well when trying to explain a misunderstanding to someone who is mad at me enough to vague me#anyway here's your reminder that you can have conversations with people instead of jumping to conclusions 😔#I mean I'm not mad and I understand retroactively why the misunderstanding happened#but also if they had even like PM'd me like “Hey if your post was about Adam I disagree bc xyz” and I would have responded like#“Oh my post wasn't about Adam at all and I didn't even realise it seemed like that sorry”#or hell if they'd even anon'd me about it#Like I'm... actually not a mean person... I'm not going to verbally assault someone for interacting with me in good faith...
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nailgunstigmata · 2 years ago
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ok im too embarrassed to link it but if u want to see charden fluff where dennis fucks an animatronic u now can live only in the charden ao3 tag 🫶 idk why u would want to but you certainly can
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tealursa · 5 months ago
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All this 100% yes, BUT that being said, a couple things for storytellers:
1) "Why?" isn't a bad question to hear from your audience, and it's not often asked in genuine bad faith. An audience asking why and wanting to know more is a good thing, it shows they're invested. And often, the answer they actually WANT isn't a literal one.
Q: "Why is the alien language atemporal?"
The literal answer could maybe be something you as the creator know, but it probably isn't, because it's probably just a plot device. A lot of creators stop here with "I don't know, because it is" or "because it needs to be for the plot."
The answer your audience actually wants is to know what themes and ideas went into the plot device. "I wanted to showcase a species, a culture that goes so far beyond humanity it's almost inconceivable. Time is human-made, but also not, and is so enmeshed in our world that this other mysterious and endless world had to exist outside of it in order to get the point across. The aliens are the universe, their language is unchanging, because change is another so-called inevitability we take for granted."
Q: "Why is it rude to eat before the ambassador eats?"
A: "Almost every culture in the world has historically – if not presently – had etiquette rules surrounding dining. In this scene, I found an opportunity to showcase the value this society places on their ambassadors and incorporate that into the world."
2) I do believe storytellers have an obligation to analyze WHY they make the choices they do. No, you don't need to reinvent DNA to give your alien green skin, you don't need to explain anything at all in your content or to your audience, but think about it yourself.
I think this is especially important in sci-fi and fantasy, which usually includes creating entire cultures with different – often conflicting – norms and expectations. The amount of times I've seen, in worldbuilding, people come up with their "Original Idea" of the "Good Country with grasslands and a monarchy" with a "desert-like Evil Country of nomadic people ruled by a dictator – oh and this country is to the East" ... I have a lot of eurocentric, islamophobic nickels.
And of course we all know about the problems that arise with creators projecting their internal bigotry onto their worldbuilding without analyzing their intentions, most notably with fantasy orcs and goblins. My favorite article on this is 'Orcs, Britons, And The Martial Race Myth' by James Mendez Hodes. An example I always look to for this are companies like Wizards of the Coast (D&D) and Paizo (Pathfinder), who will add all sorts of progressive content like polyamorous deities, diverse art and characters and cultures, to their universes, which only serves to highlight the shortcomings that are still there.
Q: "Why are orcs and goblins either inherently evil, or 'one of the good ones' who must resist their evil impulses?"
I really want to believe most people who throw a bunch of goblins in a cave for their heroes to fight aren't actually racist, but they just don't think about it. And when people of the minority group made into villains in these stories speak up, they're always met by resistance from people who use the arguments above.
"Quit asking questions."
"It's not that deep."
"That's just how the society works."
So no, you don't need to reinvent DNA to explain why the alien's skin is green, but you need to know why YOU'VE chosen to make the alien's skin green, and what your AUDIENCE might glean from that information. Because you might catch yourself sending the wrong message.
I think an important instinct you have to build up when you read/watch sci-fi is discerning which things are givens. If Arrival tells you that the alien language is atemporal, it is, that's not a puzzle for you to pick apart, it's a prerequisite to getting the rest of the story. When I talk sci-fi with people who don't consume a lot of it this seems to be a thing they get hung up on.
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pitrsattabhaadmeinjaa · 4 days ago
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why is ending a romantically/sexually aligned arrangement SO WEIRD. WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO NOW.
#like yes my anxiety about that is gone but a different sort of anxiety is there now#like it’s wanst even a relationship or anything.#it was just flirting#a little sexting#and a promise to hook up this summer#but i have ended that today for reasons i shall not get into#i wasn’t even harsh or anything like it was all me#it’s just so weird for me now lie what am i supposed to do am i supposed to unfollow him???#and his response was so short??#like i have him a whole paragraph of explanation and four more messages and all he said was “that’s fine sweetheart#“take care#like???#like yes he did make it very clear before that i can end it at anytime because he’s way way more experienced than me#but idk what to do now 😭#or who to tell all this to because the last time i did something like this my best friends wrecked my shit bro 😭 i don’t want scolding again#i could tell my sister but no#she’ll just be too chill about it like “do whatever#also. side note. since no one is gonna see this anyway i kinda miss them being such a good dom. like damn that weekend was amazing#not the guy he was nice too and hot and good at sexting#but no i am fine with that ending#also i’m kinda discovering i may not like dick?#like i am 100% sure i’m bisexual#but goddamn are dicks ugly#or maybe it was just him and his bad jerk off video sending skills#like god seeing that dick was such a turn off wtf#god who knows#like the idea of sucking a dick is hot i guess? maybe?#actually it’s hot because of the hypothetical guy’s reactions and face#not the actual dick sucking itself#original post
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bonestrouslingbones · 22 days ago
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i think the hardest part of this oneshot & trying to decide all the posting logistics of it is trying to figure out where it fits in the timeline. because like i'm technically imagining it as taking place in the short little stint between edge & stretch's universes for that good good "stuck alone together for better or worse" feel BUT i've already written a few oneshots for that time period and i am, to be perfectly honest, starting to get very very sick of not being able to use proper nicknames
#the only fics in the ao3 series that refer to edge as EDGE are the bad things happen bingo & hospital scene that i'll take down later#(not permanently it'll just be fused with a bigger multichapter fic for the rewrite)#meaning that the majority of the series has characters with the super creative names such as: russ. papyrus. red-papyrus.#maybe i can just make stretch sleep like a rock and only be acknowledged in one single sentence idk#just so i can avoid having to write a key in the opening notes for the twenty-third time#sigh. but the character dynamics after stretch joins are truly so different i dont actually know how well it would fit :(#when it's just the two of them it makes a lot more sense for edge to constantly be doing this weird shit bc he has nothing to distract him#he sees russ as a questionable figure who could hurt him at any point and vice versa and he wants that and fears it at the same time#he won't offload any of that to russ & he's still not comfortable talking to strangers in any AUs so he has to suppress and internalize it#but when stretch joins- even tho they don't really talk about /that/- edge has another person he can talk to without it being Complicated#so he's able to stop obsessing over it at the very least. his life doesn't revolve around just russ anymore#there's still Something there obviously but now it can finally fade into the background instead of being in his face All The Time#got distracted by the psychoanalysis oops ANYWAY. this is why deciding where to put it is hurting me#with all of this explanation it WOULD objectively fit the best as a pre-stretch story. but the goddamn NICKNAMES......................
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imavikingo · 2 months ago
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kinda personal (again)
The other day I was scrolling through ig reels and a dude talked about how you don't really need to know every single thing about anatomy to draw accurate/good proportioned bodies, but instead have a good sense of spatial awareness and... Fuck man. I don't have that.
I suck at it so badly in every sense of the word... Like I have had a ton of bruises for being clumsy and hitting myself with furniture or things. I often miss a step and fall of my ass (one memorable time I fell down the stairs like a turtle -bc I had a backpack- and couldn't stand up. Fun times). I also can't seem to draw things without having to check over and over with references (And I still can't get them to look right! And don't get me started at perspective or backgrounds. I've literally cried for/because of those fuckers. That's also why I get so weirded out/perfectionist/nitpicky about my own stuff. Because I can't seem to look at it with "normal" eyes. I've tried, it doesn't work). I often have difficulties with a lot of shit because of it and then some (yay for having a roomba brain, I guess).
And it's not something I can really get better at fast or without a lot of work and time (and patience! Something I also lack, because who has time for that. I need things like yesterday! Chop chop brain. And shit... I can't really wait for stuff man) sure I can have some cheats and help (and the delightful use of references, muaks) , but I can't get better at it in a timely manner (meaning now or soon and for forever. Because I constantly forget how to draw and how to paint and other stuff. It's a real struggle. Also for me to use references means to do a finished drawing and that means fatigue and suffering and nitpicking and self doubt). I never knew about this when I was younger and I never thought it was weird or a symptom of something else. I was always just clumsy, couldn't differentiate from left and right and drew weird proportioned bodies besides other "weird" shit. I didn't have a clue because people (adults) didn't have a real problem with my behavior or way of being because I was overall a good student/kid and had good grades and was mostly quiet (I don't blame them nor my parents, it's just weird to be like that since forever and suddenly realize I can't function like I should as an adult or that I have disabilities that have always been there. The chronic pain doesn't help either, but hey! I'm trying and my life is normal-ish so it isn't terrible. It's just annoying and difficult sometimes)
The point is!!! I'm shit at spatial awareness and I get frustrated because I want to be better at it without the constant fight and struggle!
#It's like when a dog wants to play ball but doesn't want for you to take the ball from em to be able to throw it.#Just throw the ball! Don't take it from me! Kinda thing#That's how my brain works lmao#Who would have thought that having adhd and -most than likely be audhd. Bc hey I haven't been tested for the other yet- would be so weird#I mean sure I've been like this my whole life but to suddenly have an explanation and reason of being?#And that my failings and struggles are mostly bc my brain functions differently?#Besides that my body -mostly my head- hates my guts and can and will make it know every single week (The fucker)#Idk I just needed that thought to leave my body and be placed into the void that is Tumblr#kinda personal#Also hey I will try my best to keep being better and drawing what I like... I'm just slower and more self-conscious about it#Also! I studied anatomy at uni! It was nice but didn't help much! Because I didn't know I had a problem with stuff at that point#Now I know and actually try to observe and deconstruct stuff into more simple shapes. Is hard still! But I'm trying!!#The perfectionist and self doubting asshole that lives rent free in my head doesn't help. But I'm trying!#I don't like to talk about my struggles (even less being really serious about them) because I feel they're excuses and also bc-#I don't like to parade my problems on the internet or to ppl in general (I've over shared info before. It's not fun or a wise thing 2 do)#But I found this kinda hilarious because I love to draw and I want to draw but I can't even do that without problems lmao#Also I've always talked and referred to my bran is roomba brain bc it's funnier that way
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neverendingford · 11 months ago
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#tag talk#had a dream I found this really gorgeous aquamarine turtleneck with actually long enough sleeves for me and then I woke up ب_ب#do you have any idea how fucking disappointing it was to wake up and realize that I do in fact not have a nice comfy turtleneck#I'm genuinely so sad#also there was a cute bra I picked up in my dream as well and guess what. I don't have that irl either.#when summer hits I wanna go thrifting again. I don't like going out in the winter but ugh. I want summer to exist pleaseeee#I'm gonna drag my new trans friend along cause that seems like it would be really fun to look at clothes together I think.#hrrnngghhhhh I want to live my life and enjoy it please I just want to#also my therapy appointment was good but it genuinely made me so exhausted for real. like. physically tired.#which means that I've for sure still got problems rattling around in my head since anytime I get close to them my body reacts physically.#I'm still tired but I think I'll be able to get up in about twenty minutes hopefully.#I stripped the old sheets from my bed but didn't remake it but I showered so I'm clean so I just went to bed without sheets anyway#it feels kind of nice somehow. bare skin on bare mattress. feeling bad and just existing under covers.#idk why but it feels like home. like I'm a kid again. I say idk that's a lie I know why.#it's nice to just be a little miserable and convalescent and dissociate and nap and drift away into nothingness for a while.#maybe that dissociation immediately after confronting my own thoughts isn't super great though.#I have such a strong aversion to my own mind. such a repulsion from digging deeper than what I'm comfortable with.#I have this fear that I'll continue to find new things wrong with me. continue to find new explanations for why I'm so fucked up and weird.#will I have a reason for why I dump my friends after a few months. why I imagine unspeakable violence on the regular.#idk. I still struggle with the hurt deep down inside and it's so extremely photosensitive that I can't open it up without it lashing out#I'm a human being grown over a skeleton of scar tissue and alien growth. a body pulled tight over the skin of another.#what the fuck am I really? I know who I am. I still don't know what.
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krysmcscience · 3 months ago
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At long last: either an alternate explanation for or continuation of my prior comic regarding how Bill was ABSOLUTELY naked in Ford's karaoke night drawing. (Because errors in art do not exist. Artists do not make mistakes. So if you see any in this comic, No You Do Not.)
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I am so normal about these old dorks.
I'm not really clear on exactly when Bill started throwing his desperation book at Ford just like a needy ex do, but I find it extremely funny to imagine it happening literally the day of or after the makeshift funeral. Bill just gets this weird sense of 'Ford is taking steps to move on' and CANNOT FUCKING ABIDE.
I hope you enjoy all the goofy things I added to each page of Bill's sad spieling. (Everything SHOULD be readable so long as you view the full size, but I have added basically this whole little fanfic in the image descriptions, LMAO, which lays out all the little written notes and such.) Also don't ask how Bill managed to sneak that vampire pen in there. I have no idea, and honestly? I don't wanna know.
Oh, and a little bonus comic:
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Of course Bill would take it as flirting. Because between the two of them, Bill is the bigger masochist By Far. :)
Also I have continued applying The Good Place logic to any of Bill's attempts to swear. Case in point, one last bonus image, this time with a motivational line from my slapdash Theraprism OC, EV-01:
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Yes, its name is just 'love' backwards. No, I will not be taking any feedback on this. Yes, EV-01 was only ever assigned to Bill's case due to the Theraprism being desperate to make some progress in rehabilitating him. No, it did not work anywhere close to staff's expectations - Bill didn't even appreciate EV-01's matching fondness for bowties! (He claimed the fondness to be "cultural appropriation" and insisted he'd been traumatized by it.)
Anyway, if you like my stuff, reblogs are very much appreciated, and if you really really like it, perhaps consider my commissions or yeeting a teeny tiny tip my way? I am trying to recoup over 500 dollars in vet bills, ahaha... 🙃
In other news, I loved all the fun tags people added to the prior naked-karaoke comic (such as 'the hat and bow-tie stay ON during sex' and the classic '[insert keysmash here]', as well as the many amused/bewildered remarks about how I either made the bricks a piece of clothing or just straight up peeled Bill's skin off). However, I think my favorite thing by far was the several people losing their shit over the fact that I gave Bill toes. Like, excuse me? The magical talking triangle can have fingers but not toes??? Since when was that a rule????? 🤣 (Also the one person who reblogged with the cropped panel where Bill's fishnets pants are falling off to ask why Bill peed himself. Dude, I want to examine your brain...?)
Okie-dokie, I'm sick of looking at all of this stuff now and I'm off to go to work, after which I will either scribble some more goofy "Billford" comics or perhaps draw my lame human!Bill in Situations, idk yet. Maybe I'll even finally draw more than just a single other person's human!Bill...? Who knows, but I sure hope I can mix it up a little and not turn whatever I draw into a month-long fukken project. >:\
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othercrossee · 2 years ago
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if youre asking about my writing for palina and irida in the timeskip one, its probably that they will never ever be as close as they were before. or its better to say they were never that close to begin with
#z rambles#idk maybe its just me but i really cannot see these two being chummy besties#which is even more funny when u realize theres a time when people like. legitimate ship them (and we fucking know why)#like its so weird like damn girl u cannot consume media without making mlm ships then make a half assed assessment for a wlw one#should stated that palina isnt a bad person. but she is a bad friend. shes not evil shes just misguided#and i really do blame how both of them are like and then be due to a lot of trauma inflicted by the elder#generational trauma momeeennnnttt#anyways despite their friendship not working out. i do think they actually like. fucking communicate this whole shit out#so in the timeskip despite them not being perfect. theyre doing a lot better and a lot more on equal grounds#what palina did to irida wont be forgotten. irida will feel the sting and palina will have the guilt#its really up to palina own decision to see pass her pettiness and consider her friends emotion as well#and knowing her. it will be pretty fucking hard but heres the surprise#both of them didnt have support systems when they were young. and tbh i do get where palina is coming from#but it still sucks how she choose to manifest her anger toward the person who admired and loved her#who really thought palina had her best interest at heart and with no explanation. no communication#that fiend just got up. yelled at you. left and refuse to elaborate to the point of scolding and humiliating you time and time again#and sure irida shouldve respect the whole dont call me lina bs but even then? its still rather selfish of her to not see iridas effort#call them bestfriends all u want. idk why yall mfs somehow could read their relationship as a fruitful one#cuz its bad. even in the timeskip irida had to go thru loops to talk to palina cuz palina still doubt her ability#it will never be good enough for her. it will never be good enough of a relationship so uhhhh hope this helps!#and yeah i dont usually shame people but if u ship these two. yeah im gonna need u to replay the game LMAO
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