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thedoctorisadhd · 7 years ago

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what's once on this island about?

i hope ur happy anon, bc this took me literally like six hours im not exaggerating even a little

short answer: so u take the original plot of the littlest mermaid and u plunk it down rIGHT in the middle of 1920s haiti, right

long answer (like, REALLY long answer. like REALLY long. im sorry i dont know how to summarize when there are so many good things):

“there is an island where rivers run deep…”

“where the sea, sparkling in the sun, earns it the name, ‘jewel of the antilles.’”

“an island where the poorest of peasants labor —”

“— and the wealthiest of the grand hommes lay.”

“two different worlds on one island!”

“the grand hommes, owners of the land and masters of their own fates.”

“and the peasants, eternally at the mercy of the wind and sea, would pray constantly to the gods.”

those are the four storytellers, beginning the play. lydia started the first line, then abby, then dori, then natalie, and repeat.

(oh yeah, also this is the jr version. also, i dont know everything bc i was backstage the majority of the time)

so the gods that the beach people / peasants are dancing to, theres 4 of them. asaka (played by lavanya in our production) is the goddess of the earth, erzulie (played by luke who’s closeted, so i change it to a god, erzulio) beautiful goddess of love. agwe (played by ian) is the god of the sea, and papa ge (eli, of course, and it’s literally pronounced papa gay), my personal favorite, is the sly demon of death

and this is all described in the first number “we dance”

stay tuned yo it gets better.

(its so good. dont ever listen to any version besides the chatham one i can guarantee you that any non-eli papa ge, any non-luke erzulie / erzulio, any non-lavanya asaka, any non-ian agwe, any non-lydia / dori / abby / natalie storyteller will not be as good)

so basically theres this storm, and in this storm is a little girl and the gods are like “no papa ge we’re not killing her you fuck” and they irresponsibly plunk her down in a tree

and so tonton julien (ben) and mama euralie (izzy) come along & are like “holy shit a kid” (and this girl is crying her eyes out of course bc as mr adam creatively put it to the girl who played young ti moune, “you were just dropped in a tree by some randos you’ve never seen before in your entire life”) but like theyre poor and dont have a lotta food and shit so they try to leave but the gods, showing some small modicum of responsibility, like, use the force to pull them back. so these peasants adopt ti moune and name her ti moune and theres a whole big number about her growing up called “one small girl” which i quite like actually

then ti moune is grown up (sammie) and she sings about like “whats my destiny yo” all naive in “waiting for life” and sees a car which is a big ol lead-in to the next number. which brings us to

so in the beginning of “rain” theres this HILARIOUS section of dialogue with the gods picking mangos and here it is bc i cant not include it man

asaka: 🎵 pick a mango! 🎵

agwe: 🎵 a juicy mango! 🎵

erizulie: 🎵 a lovely mango! 🎵

papa ge, being Himself: 🎶 a poison mango! 😈 🎶

[all of the other gods look at papa ge]

anyway, after that theyre all proposing things to do to get ti moune less naive, with such wonderful suggestions from these dumbasses as “splash her with a wave” and “scare her half to death”. and then erzulie is like “yeah u do that imma give her what she wants bye” and the other gods are like “????????????” and shes just like “You Heard Me” and just goes like “Love Can Conquer Anything!!!!!!! :)))))))) ❤️💞💕💚💛💙💜💝💘💗💖❣️” and papa ge is like “that’s bullshit this whole thing is bullshit that’s a scam fuck the love here’s like two reasons why” and they argue (and asaka remarks that this is “more amusing than mangos”) and the gods are all “HMMMM🤔🤔” and then they all go “A BET!”

and the gods all start like pitching in to set up this bet, so like erzulie gives her strength and asaka’s gonna guide her but then papa ge interrupts like “IM GONNA MAKE HER CHOOSE” and then johnny boy i mean ian i mean agwe then calls dibs on choosing the circumstances of the bet

and u remember that car right? well ian agwe is like “that. thats the place where the 2 worlds meet” and he creates a big ol storm and in the song he says (one of my favorite lines, actually) “rain makes the road such a dangerous place” (he did amazing in that song but i feel kinda bad bc like. he was overshadowed by the other gods who are all incredible singers, and parts of it were too low for him. like, eli can sing as high as he did, but ian really cant sing that low)

also they used the fish flags from the seussical two years ago when sammie’s sister sidne played the cat in the hat. i always found it hilarious that dori of all people they couldve chosen played a fish

ANYWAY. so the car is goin down the road and crash oh no a car accident. totally not what agwe was (shot)gunning for

and so ti moune pulls this guy outta the car right, and — by the way, now we’re in this super intense number called “pray” — and this song is real fuckin good alright.

my opinion upon this is based almost solely on the fact that within the first like ten lines of this epically long song a peasant, talking about the guy that got pulled outta the car (daniel, that’s his name), says, literally: “papa ge wants him!” i will remind you that papa ge is pronounced “papa gay” and what makes it even more astronomically fuckin funny is that both hank, the guy that played daniel, and eli, who as u may know played papa ge, are mlm.

anyway no one wants to help daniel even tho he’s Actively Dying bc Fuck The Grand Hommes, Am I Right Guys We Cant Do Anything Were Peasants And There Is Sanctity That We Must Never Talk To Look At Or Think About A Single Grand Homme, Ever™ but ti mounes gonna help him bc Fuck You Guys and she keeps him alive while tonton julien goes to find the guys family after she’s Finally persuaded the guy to do this

and ti moune doesnt sleep for Three Fucken Days by the way. thats important in the next number

also daniel is supposed to be good looking so of course ti moune Falls In Love With Him despite never having seen him before in her entire life, and also hes unconcious the Whole time. i dont understand the heterosexuals

anyway, tonton juliens at the gate to daniels family hotel and he’s like “pls let me in i need to speak to monsieur beausome!” and the gatekeepers like “get the fuck away my guy” and hes like “no but its urgent!!” and the gatekeeper SLAPS BEN [LAST NAME REDACTED]*

so ben i mean tonton recovers and like seriously gets down on his knees and begs and the gatekeeper is still like “FUCK! NO!” and then ben fucking [last name redacted]* SCREAMS SAVAGELY “I HAVE FOUND HIS SON!” HOO BOY

and then at the end of pray you hear a long high note and then one specific girl takes it HIGHER ????????? idk who it is for sure but im willing to put my money on lavanya bc jesus christ can that girl sing

*people always say bens full name when referring to him for some reason, so it’s not ben bc which ben? it’s not ben b. it’s ben [last name redacted].

so pray goes ge STRAIGHT into forever yours. not the reprise, thats later.

so. forever yours. in a STUNNING turn of events (sarcasm. absolutely the least stunning thing after the whole “papa gay wants him” in pray), the VERY fucking FIRST LINE IN THIS WHOLE FUCKING STUPID HEARTFELT SONG is literally ti moune saying “i am a tree, holding away the storm”. are you fucking serious. are you kidding me. you waste the first line on that monstrosity,

anyway basically what happens in this is ti moune is singing about tending to daniel here it is

i am a tree holding away the stormhere in my arms i’ll keep u safe and warmeven the gods wont dare to cross this linewhere my life is forever yoursand you are mine

and on that last word, “mine”, papa ge joins in and it is fuckin CHILLING, not LEAST bc eli has the voice of a fuckin angel (and sammie too, but i think eli’s is just slightly better)

so eli stalks in and the first thing papa ge does, in a True demonstration of the gay / ge agenda, is Drag The Het.

(then he goes on to say “this boy is mine”)

so eli’s also got a knife (a fake one) and this is another Important Thing so yeah

anyway sammie ti moune should “TAKE MINE FOR HIS.” (her life she meant) and papa ge is SHOOK. he just … stops. “wot”

so yeah. ti moune, in one of The most IMPRESSIVE displays of heterosexual tomfoolery and ridiculousness i have Yet Seen (scene), trades her life for this Complete Fuckin Stranger she pulled out of the car wreck whomst has not as of yet spoken a Single word to her bc HE’S BEEN UNCONSCIOUS THE WHOLE TIME!?

and heres another good line, the first gay daddy nico diangelo himself eli papa gay papa ge has had since “wot”: i am the road / leading to no return

(and this is also where eli goes REALLY high. like not for basically everyone else, but for him)

then daniels two dads apparently, grant and hugh, pick him up and take him back to the hotel and ti moune is like “NOOOOOOO” and makes mama and tonton let her leave to go find daniel, and frankly i am not very interested in this specific part of the song so fuck that i skipped it lmao lets get to lavanyas fuckin SOLO

alright. “mama will provide”. exactly what it says on the tin, taking it into account that asaka would be mother earth i guess

really all this one is is lavanya’s fuckin angelic voice and What Exists In Nature, and i cant very well put lavanya’s voice down on the page for yinz to hear can i? the only notable thing i can really think of besides this next piece a dialogue will share w u is in the beginning theres a bunch of ensemble doing weird repeating acapella and some hopping in like frogs. “COO COO coo coo cOO COO COOO” “SHAH shaSHA-ah” “buuuuu BUM! BUM! bum” its sounds slightly weirder than it is

anyway here’s the best dialogue:

everyone: MOSQUITOS??

asaka: HA!

ACT TWO HERE WE FUCKIN GO ALRIGHT

ok, so ti moune finds daniel who doesnt know who she is bc, you know, he was unconscious the entire time. she gets him to know she was the one who nursed him tho. and they go to the front of the stage and ti moune sits and daniel puts his head on her lap. again, poor hank

now, “human heart”. jesus. i have literally cried over this song.

so erzulie goes out on stage to where hank is slowly suffering, probably, and sings this GODS DAMN BEAUTIFUL SONG about like, love n shit i guess. the storytellers and the other three gods act as a sort of choir. that’s pretty much all there is to say about human heart tho. moving on

ok so for “pray (reprise)” the gossipers (which are apparently supposed to be the storytellers, but fuck that thats lame, give my Cool Hoes lianna and taylor parts tbh) go out on stage and sing about how daniel is spending all his time w a peasant and shes a witch and yadda yadda yadda. and then theres some lame romance shit that i dont have fuckin time for

anyway, the song culminates with daniel’s father comin out on stage (lmao). which father, u ask? he had two of em? well that was grant and hugh, this one’s iain. conclusion: daniel has three polyamorous gay dads. this is the gayest production of a play ive ever seen. i mean papa ge? “papa ge wants him”? the fact that tonton means uncle so mama euralie and tonton julien arent married? “this boy is mine” coming from daddy gay himself? the fact that daniels last name means beautiful man? the “beautiful god of love” (as luke said, refusing to misgender himself in his introduction U GO LUKE)? the fact that out of the main cast (the 4 gods, the 4 storytellers, daniel, ti moune, andrea, mama euralie, and tonton julien) there are literally eight (8) actors who Arent straight (id bet that two others arent str8 and or / cis as well but im not sure)? just change daniel to danielle and itll be perfect

ayway daniel’s 3rd dad comes out on stage and tells him to stop this nonsense, young man ANYWAY NEXT SONG

in “some girls” the rich guys at the hotel all are doing a really lame colorless boring dance. then this girl andrea (ava) comes out and sings about the rumors about ti moune, that she’s stupid or wild, and daniel tells her to stop, then ti moune arrives and andrea really condescendingly asks her to dance for everyone and daniel encourages ti moune

so ti moune does a slow lame dance and then it gets loud and wild and fun! then when she’s done andrea goes to daniel and is like “she’s in love with you you oblivious fuck if you care at all you’ll tell her —” (unclear about what he’s caring about) and andrea is interrupted by ti moune who’s like “HI I HEARD MY NAME WHATCHA WANT ANDREA” and daniel goes and breaks her fuckin heart right

how he does this is he’s like “oops sorry i thought u would realize that we could never marry bc andrea and i are already engaged (since we were babies)”. daniel demonstrates an amazing amount of calmness about being forced to marry this girl he’s known all his life, and an incredible amount of insensitiveness bc TI MOUNE WAS NEVER FUCKIN TOLD THAT HE WAS ENGAGED. honestly i loathe literally every single character in this play except for the gods and the storytellers lmao

OK NOW FOR MY FAVORITE FUCKIN ONE WOW :~)

the reprise of forever mine.

so. ti moune is alone on stage and she goes like “gods please are u listening help me” and then. u hear. eli’s fucking amazing evil laugh and the gay himself appears

and he’s like u gotta keep ur promise ti moune im here to collect on that Soul

did i mention elis voice is beautiful? no i dont care, im sayin it again, eli [last name redacted] has the voice of an angel

anyway he’s like “u gave him ur soul, now u have to PAY” (the line he used here is “i am the price you’ll pay” and that sounds cool as shit)

and so “father homosexual,” as he was dubbed by luke, takes out his knife and sings “your life is forever mine” and holds the knife to ti mounes neck and ti moune yells “PLEASE DONT” and and and

he stops.

“trade your life for his.”

so papa ge gives her the knife and tells her to go stab daniel and he sings “i am the road that leads to no return” as he walks to the left side of the stage, and erzulie appears at the right side and sings human heart as papa ge continues with his verse from the first forever mine as ti moune struggles towards and away from daniel, straining, being pulled by opposite forces, love and death, and the two unite in singing “forever mine!” and ti moune casts the knife to the floor and screams “NO!”

and the music stops

and daniel sees the knife and picks it up

and says “why?!”

(fuckin bitch shoulda stabbed him when she had the chance)

and ti moune gets cast out and like, withers away at the gate neither eating nor sleeping, and then daniel comes to the gate with andrea at his wedding and sees ti moune and gives her a coin when she runs after him, and she collapses and the gods, sOMEHOW GAINING SOME MINISCULE VIEW OF THE CONSEQUENCES OF THEIR FUCKIN ACTIONS, all start CRYING. (erzulie won the bet) and erzulie hugs ti moune and papa ges probably off somewhere feeling sorry for himself bc you cant fuckin see him in the footage (nah, he’s off at the side of the stage with the other two gods neither of whomst you can see either), and mama euralie comes to sing this sad and pretty number “part of us” and then tonton and baby ti moune arrive as well for some fuckin reason,

and mama euralie says,

“and then the gods blessed her and turned her into —”

and then the gods hit their staffs on the floor (ian a bit gentlier bc his was falling apart bc he wouldnt stop fucking licking the fucking ribbons, ian) “a tree!”

and the tree comes up, forwards this time thankfully (phew) and and the tree fuckin cracks the walls of the hotel, get rekt scrubs, and the tree fuckin stalks daniel i guess, and daniels son sits by the tree and looks up and theres a peasant girl in its branches, and ti moune touches everyones hearts and also their livers, and everyone starts singing “why we tell the story”

also, fun story real quick, ive never actually seen eli dab i dont think (that’s something i need to accomplish real soon), and the dance he went off to the side and did with like, lydia, and agwe and ben [last name redacted] and daniels son and hugh — i guess all the boys in musical theater and also lydia, and the dance they have to do looks pretty damn like dabbing, and like, eli’s holding his staff so he cant do a true dab, really, but he can do a one armed one — but no. his dancing looks more like fuckin waving. ben [last name redacted] is dabbing, daniels son is dabbing, im like 80 percent sure ian’s dabbing directly behind eli, gloria’s dabbing in the back, but no, nOT ELI. im pretty sure he’s deliberately avoiding it smh

anyway

whOOP exciting parts over. now it’s time for Sad Half Circle Around Tree Girl i guess

“the stories that we weave,” and the storytellers and daniel’s son and the peasant girl in tree moune’s branches all come to the front and —

“there is an island where rivers run deep…”

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babygirlblogging-lise-blog · 5 years ago

Text

My First

I failed my driving test.

That was in the fall of 2017, I was a senior in high school. All of my friends were getting their licenses and cars while I was stuck being a passenger. The woman who failed me thought I wasn’t confident enough. Like damn, can’t even be nervous without being penalized these days huh? She failed me for the most ridiculous shit. But that has nothing to do with the story I plan on telling.

A few weeks before my eighteenth birthday I tried again. This was something I needed to do before I turned 18. Giving up wasn’t an option. There was no way I wanted to retake my written if I didn’t pass before I was considered a legal adult. The guy who tested me this time? He was fine as hell and now that I think about it, I was supposed to text him when I turned eighteen. I lost his number, sadly. But that also has nothing to do with the story. I want to tell you the story about the first guy I-

-’ve always been cheap. I was ten when my aunt was going to get a new car. I convinced her to save her old car for me so that when I started driving I wouldn’t have to buy a car. By the end of the summer of 2017, my grandpa fixed up the old car and I was all good to go. Free to go wherever I wanted. I no longer had to wait around for people, waste money on lyfts or walk. So naturally, I took myself on adventures.

One night, against my better judgement. I lied to my mom and said I was going to hang out with my friends. If I would have told her what I was really going to do, she would’ve gone into over protective mode and I didn’t want that. I just wanted some time to myself. I drove over the bridge and into Philly. Not for a concert or any other event. I just wanted some me time. I parked my car. Got oreo ice cream and sugar cookies from Insomnia Cookies and walked around the city.

Not going to lie and say I knew exactly where I was at all times. I wasn’t even guaranteed that I was safe, I wasn’t focused on my surroundings. All I know is I was somewhere around Broad Street, because that’s where Insomnia Cookies was located. I came across this huge, gorgeous building, I’m not very good at names. Everything was lit up and there was art on the sides of some of the buildings surrounding it. There was even a fountain in front of it all. The scene just looked so beautiful. I walked across the street, hopped up on a ledge and just took it all in. It felt serene, even with so many people flooding the sidewalks. I sat and continued eating my snacks, I was enjoying clearing my head. Until someone interrupted me that is…

“Hey.” I looked up to see a cute guy. There were a few girls not too far from me talking. It was the beginning of August, late at night but still pushing eighty degrees. Of course they were clad in clothes that left nothing to the imagination. I figured he was talking to them. Guys like the ones who look easy. He couldn’t have been talking to me. So I went back to dipping my cookie into my ice cream and admiring the scenery. I didn’t really acknowledge the fact that he moved a little closer to me. He said hey again and I finally looked up at him directly, before looking around. He laughed a little. “I don’t blame you for being that into ya snacks. I love their shit. But I’ve been trying to get your attention for a minute.” Yep, he’s definitely talking to me. I was confused as to why though. I get hit on by guys pretty often, I know I’m not ugly but with him talking to me, I felt extremely insecure. Suddenly I wished that I had dressed a little better. I looked like a child for fucks sakes. I was wearing a gold fish shirt, black tights, a hat that said “Hoodrats” and Chucks. I was even swinging my legs off the ledge, eating ice cream!

He introduced himself as Dey. I wanted to know the name his mom gave him so I asked him for his full name. Ayinde. Pronounced Uh-zhen-day. Unique. It has African origins. He told me that my name was almost as pretty as I was. If I were white, I definitely would have blushed. I didn’t understand why he made me feel so shy.

I learned that he was mixed with Irish, Haitian and Cuban. Interesting mix, I know. Despite his slight baby face, he turned out to be 20. He was tall, about 6’1. He had taken his hat off to redo his ponytail, he tied his curly, brown hair back into a man bun. He was light skinned with a slight tan. Doe brown eyes paired with the cutest smile. He was dressed in all black, I would’ve been a little concerned if it weren’t for the logo on his hat. I could see a tattoo peeking out from under his short sleeved shirt. Just my type.

I was tired of the small talk and beating around the bush. “Why’d you come over here to talk to me?” Instead of replying, the douche just smiled and then hopped up on the ledge next to me. It was weird. I was supposed to be having me time, if any other guy did this I would’ve been rude. I wouldn’t have given them the time of day. I wasn’t even afraid, Ayinde strangely made me feel safe. Something was telling me to give him a chance, instead of shutting him down.

“Well, I was on break, I work across the street.” He points to a small cafe. “I saw you walk by and… I don’t know I thought you were beautiful. Now that I’ve gotten closer, it seems so effortless. No make up and you’re not even dressed up.”

Shit, I have no clue what to say to this. He’s been nice and respectful. “Thank you.” Well, that was lame but it was safe. We talked more before he had to go back to work. He was funny as hell, we both had the same rude, dark, sarcastic humor. He complimented me pretty often and he seemed kind of bummed that he had to leave once his break was over.

“Why don’t you grow some balls and just ask me what you wanna ask me.” I thought to myself, I should be a fucking actress. I’m great at faking confidence.

He laughed and just smiled at me for a second. “Well, I would like to get to know you more. Can I get your number?”

You know when you give someone your number, you almost expect them to wait days or weeks to text you. Surprisingly, Ayinde texted me that night.

AYINDE: hey beautiful, u get home safely?

ME: Oh shit, I see u found ur balls!

AYINDE: lol yea yea yea. I know I was acting like a pussy earlier but that’s not how I usually am

***

AYINDE: FT me? I haven’t seen u since we met punk

ME: No I look crazy rn

AYINDE: Is tht even possible? I think you’re cute af

ME: aww thanks but everyone’s entitled to their own insecurities

AYINDE: Ig but that’s y u need me

ME: wym?

AYINDE: to take away your insecurities

ME: Doubt that’s possible

AYINDE: try me

***

ME: entertain meee! I’m bored, stuck at my great grandma’s house :(

AYINDE: I literally just woke up, still in bed

ME: Luckyyy, my head’s fucking killing me

AYINDE: wish I could help

ME: me too lol do u have superpowers?

AYINDE: no, do u?

ME: Nah I’m not tht awesome

AYINDE: I think ur pretty awesome

Ayinde and I got closer over the next month. We hadn’t actually seen each other after the first time we met. He worked crazy hours and still had school. I worked everyday and had school as well. Plus, I wasn’t completely comfortable meeting up with a guy I didn’t really know. He understood that. He always made sure I was comfortable before we did anything. He eventually convinced me to facetime him… a lot... and when we didn’t he acted like a big baby.

ME: u happy now?

AYINDE: lol no

ME: y not -_-

AYINDE: I got nothing pretty to look at now

ME: whose fault it tht?

AYINDE: idk. Do u kno?

ME: Lol yea ik

AYINDE: tell me

ME: yours :P

AYINDE: well if u came over we wouldn’t have this problem

I was a very late bloomer. I knew freshmen girls who got pregnant, meanwhile I hadn’t had my first kiss until I was 16. I didn’t start dating until 17. I was a fresh 18 and I was still a virgin. I waited a while to tell him because I liked him and didn’t want to scare him off. But he surprised me, I learned that he wasn’t like other guys. Most guys only want you for one thing. And that’s to get them off. Not all are gonna be lovey dovey when you’re not putting out.

ME: I hate being a girl. I think my uterus just exlpoded. Im dying

AYINDE: Aww u can’t die yet, I havent taken u out yet

ME: wut do u want from meee

AYINDE: I told u what I want

ME: hmmmm

AYINDE: i didnt?

ME: u could have an ulterior motive

AYINDE: lol what? Ayo y cant I just think ur gorgeous and want to get to kno u, find out who u r

***

He was very protective of me. Anytime I even looked a tiny bit sad or sounded off, he was ready to beat someone up for me.

AYINDE: ur awake?

ME: Yea just woke up on some bs

AYINDE: u good?

ME: yea im ok lol

AYINDE: u sure? I’ll fuck someone up

ME: lol yea im good now

And as the oldest, always looking out for my little brothers and my friends. It felt good to have someone looking out for me for a change.

***

ME: I move into college tmw nd I aint pack shit yet

AYINDE: ur bugging

ME: Pack 4 me?

AYINDE: lol ill pass

ME: my back hurts like all hell, some of this shit is heavy

AYINDE: what u carrying…?

ME: 4 one, I hav a lot of clothes, they add up nd I had to take em downstairs

AYINDE: lol whoakay wittle wone

ME: fuck u, this shit weighs more than me! I almost fell down the stairs!

AYINDE: thts cuz ur like 87 lbs

ME: Aye! Give me my props, im like 120

AYINDE: lol i see u killa

I fucking loved when he called me that, made me feel invincible.

Despite how it seems this isn’t a love story. This isn’t a memoir about me finding my first love. Bleh. That’s so sappy. I want to tell you about the first time I stepped out of my comfort zone. You’ve experienced a snippet of our relationship. Ayinde and I were never together. We were just people who met at the wrong time. Had too much going on in our separate lives to focus on developing a relationship. But it didn’t stop us from pursuing the unique friendship we had. For years we maintained contact, I’d visit him pretty often but we always kept our distance when it came to personal things. We used each other as escapes from our realities. We were each other’s vacation after a long week.

One night we were hanging out and things got more heated than they usually did. I wasn’t prepared to take the next step with anyone. No worries, I’m not about to make you uncomfortable and talk about how I lost my virginity because that isn’t the point. Before I say anything, I did have a great childhood. But some things did leave me scarred, I struggled with intimacy as a result. To make a long story short, it makes me self conscious, not something I’ll flaunt for the whole world to see.

I’m the type of girl who will wait until the bathroom is empty to change my pad or start going to the bathroom. If it’s too busy, I’ll wait all day until I go home. In the locker room, I’d find the farthest corner or wait until all the girls leave to change my clothes. I’m not comfortable being alone around men. I used to clench my pocket knife in my hand when I walked home alone at night. The list goes on.

The point of this memoir is to tell about the first time I felt completely comfortable in my own skin. Let alone, around a guy.

They were everywhere. Trailing from my neck and back up against mine. His lips were distracting. I could barely focus. Let alone notice that the both of us were wearing less and less clothing by the minute. I stopped.

I wouldn’t be able to handle him not liking what he saw. What if I did a bad job? What if he stopped talking to me?

“Do you want me to stop?” Ayinde pulled back from me looking concerned. He looks so cute right now. I kind of wanted to pick up where we left off.

“Ye-No. It’s just, can you turn the lights completely down?” He liked his room dim, not too bright or dark. It was normally perfect but at that moment, they were making this situation turn into a nightmare.

“Um, why? What’s wrong?” He’s still hovering above me. I didn’t really want him to move. I bit my lip, contemplating.

“Just don’t look at me any differently. Okay?” I pulled him down by the back of his neck and kissed him hard. Hoping that my issues with myself wouldn’t be a big deal, I’ve never gone this far with anyone.

When the time came. I held my breath. Okay, I see my pants on the floor near the dresser. My shirt is near the door. I was locating my clothing so that I’d be able to leave quicker. I’m not really one to feel embarrassed but this was going to be borderline humiliating if I wasn’t enough for him. This reminded me of how I felt when I failed my driving test, but I wanted to do this with Ayinde. I didn’t want to quit just because I hadn’t grown the balls to show anyone else. I didn’t want to miss out because I was nervous as to what he might think. I had to at least give him a chance.

What Ayinde did shocked me. Instead of being grossed out or losing his hard on. He didn’t ask any questions, he didn’t say anything. He kissed every part of my body and when he was done he leaned down to kiss my lips. I was worried, about him seeing all of me, for no reason. He wound up giving me the confidence I needed to be comfortable in my own skin. He told me what I needed to hear from a guy that I was into, not my parents:

“You’re beautiful.”

And just like that... I didn’t have anymore insecurities.

#insecure #short story

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deadcactuswalking · 6 years ago

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS - CHRISTMAS SPECIAL: 9th December 2018

Geez, today was a busy week. Before we talk about the top 10, however, let’s just get the massive elephants out of the way.

CHRISTMAS NONSENSE

It’s the festive season and one way people celebrate the holidays is by listening to its music – usually, Christmas music, of course, and since I review all returning entries that I haven’t talked about yet, sigh... There are seven of these so I’m going to go as quick as possible, but just bear with me throughout this section because I really don’t like Christmas music all that much. Let’s just get it over with.

#39 – “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” – Brenda Lee

This is “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree”, a song written by Johnny Marks and released in 1958 in the US, being left on the shelf for four years until its release in the UK in 1962. In 1963, it peaked at number-six and has since re-entered due to digital downloads, with one of its highest recent peaks being number-seven last year. It’s pretty inoffensive rockabilly, with some nice very-50s guitar licks coming in throughout, and some decently-sounding production, but really it’s not anything of internet until that sax solo. That solo is freaking gorgeous, and I’m glad it’s there, because otherwise this would just kind of fall to the wayside. Not sure I like Lee’s voice on here, it comes off as a bit nasal, but it’s not a big deal. It’s alright, I guess. I expected to say RIP here since she was popular such a long time ago, but no, she’s still alive and kicking. Good for her.

#36 – “Merry Christmas Everyone” – Shakin’ Stevens

Now this is where it all breaks down into dread. This song by Shakin’ Stevens is Godawful, mostly because of how painfully manufactured the whole thing is. It’s overproduced Christmas music that is just jolly feelings and nothing else. Those horns that kick in after the first verse are pretty cool, but Stevens doesn’t sound great here – or at least I can’t tell because he’s drowned in reverb – and the choir might as well be a computer for all I care. Also, the sax solo was cool the first time in Brenda Lee’s track, but here it’s just trite, especially when you add those shooby-doo-wops over it. This track was initially the Christmas number-one for 1985, and I understand why, but does it really have to come back every year since 2007 – for over 60 weeks in total? Oh, it peaked last year at #10 too. Let’s hope this upwards trend doesn’t continue.

#35 – “Santa Tell Me” – Ariana Grande

Now for a more recent one from arguably the biggest popstar in the world right now, with her 2014 song that actually failed to chart in the Top 40 initially until last year at #29, and that’s its peak so far... whilst I’ve never been a fan of the cleaner, refined Ariana Grande records, I do have a soft spot for this one. That melody is infectious and the sleigh bells complement the synth bass in a way I didn’t think they would, and it’s not like the drums are all that overpowering here, although a trap skitter would have worked better here (yeah, I know, not something I say often). It’s surprisingly romantic and sensual for a song with Santa in the title, actually, although it’s about men who have wronged her. Anyway, Ariana kills it but what else do you expect from a song from her at this point? It’s a good track, although the final chorus with the choir is really cluttered, just saying, it’s messy.

#30 – “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas” – Michael Bublé

This here is Michael Bublé’s cover of traditional Christmas classic written in 1951 by Meredith Wilson, and it’s not great. Obviously, I mean, it’s Michael Bublé, ever since “Haven’t Met You Yet” he’s been utterly useless seasonal radio fodder. Bublé never really sounds bad but he never sounds interesting, and this production isn’t doing him any favours. It’s sickly sweet strings and brass for the most part, with some piano added in there for good measure, after what seems to be way too long of just airy synth, string and guitar noise – that’s really out of place, guys, why is this on the single edit? Ah, what else to say? Oh, right, nothing.

#26 – “Do They Know it’s Christmas?” – Band Aid

Oh, I know it’s Christmas time, alright, this song won’t let me forget it. I could ramble on about how preachy and awful this charity single is but other people have done it better. I just have four short things to say – 1.) this was the most popular song in the UK of the entire 80s. Yikes. 2.) This is the worst thing the Boomtown Rats have had any involvement in. They’re such a great band, hell so are Culture Club. How do Boy George, the Boomtown Rats, Ultravox, Phil Collins, U2, Kool & the Gang, Sting and Duran Duran make something this awful? They’re all absolutely fantastic musicians in their own right. 3.) That synth that kicks in after a while is pretty ugly, not gonna lie, and is unfitting for the condescending Christmas charity single angle they’re going for here – mostly because that’s what it really is. 4.) We’ve remade and reissued and re-entered this song too many times. Let it go, Britain. Please. We’re begging you. It’s for a good cause, and I appreciate how much money it’s raised, but it’s also garbage.

#18 – “Fairytale of New York” – The Pogues featuring Kirsty MacColl

They use the word because it was the 80s, it’s not meant to mean homosexual and it’s not used in that context – albeit still a negative one – and the climate of Ireland, especially the Celtic punk scene, wasn’t exactly going to care about dropping that slur in their Christmas single. It should still be censored, though, I mean, black rappers saying the N-word is morally okay, but we still mute those, right? Anyway, this is one of the best songs I’ve ever heard. It starts with a beautifully elegant piano melody, with the lead singer of the Pogues, Shane MacGowan, mumbling his way through his verse, but instead of people like Future or Lil Baby, there’s still a lot of sincerity there, I feel, and a lot of soul is put into expressing the lyrics here in the raspy tone that I absolutely love. I’m not going to talk much about the story here mostly because I’m not going to go in-depth, but it’s about a typical love story going awry at some point due to a betrayal. Oh, and the moment the Celtic traditional instruments come in is one of the best moments in music – ever. Kirsty MacColl sounds so lovely here, and the harmonisations in the chorus are fantastic. That flute solo is gorgeous, and the juxtaposition between “you’re a bum, you’re a punk, you’re an old s--- on junk, lying there almost dead as a drip on that bed” and the cheerful instrumental is just hilarious to me, especially since right after “Happy Christmas your a---, I thank God it’s our last” is immediately followed by the bombastic drunk sing-a-long chorus. The third verse is also such a great back-and-forth, man, I can’t even bring to words how much I admire and adore this piece of music. This is the best song I think I’ve ever talked about on this show, by far, but it could have easily not been close if “2000 Miles” by the Pretenders returned this week. We’ll just hope for next week, I guess. Rest in peace to Kirsty MacColl, gone much too young.

#14 – “Last Christmas” – WHAM!

Finally, we have our last Christmas song for this week’s holiday REVIEWING THE CHARTS special. It’s an anti-climactic end, to be honest, because I’m pretty indifferent to this song. It’s pretty 80s, to be fair, so I’ve got to like some of the cheesy falsetto vocalisations from the late George Michael at the start, as well as those repetitive synths that keep themselves from sounding awful by having those sleigh bells and pretty damn nice keys covering them. That chorus is iconic, but the rest of the lyrics are just forgettable. Honestly, it’s a good background song and it’s a well-written, catchy pop track with Michael putting in some good vocals throughout, but, it’s nothing special. Nothing but respect to George Michael, though, rest in peace, he’s a pop legend over here.

Christmas Conclusion

The best Christmas song on the charts right now is easily “Fairytale of New York” by the Pogues and Kirsty MacColl, but an Honourable Mention goes to Mariah Carey for “All I Want for Christmas is You”. Yup, that’s still here, we’ll get to that in a second. Worst of the Week goes to Band Aid for “Do They Know it’s Christmas?” You should be ashamed, Bob. Dishonourable Mention is going to Shakin’ Stevens for “Merry Christmas Everyone”. Other Christmas songs you should check out are “Christmas in Harlem” by Kanye West, Teyana Taylor and CyHi tha Prynce featuring Musiq Soulchild (heck, check out the longer version if you wish), “2000 Miles” by the Pretenders, “Stop the Cavalry” by Jona Lewie, “Christmas Lights” by Coldplay, “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch” by Tyler, the Creator and “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” by DMX. Yes, those last two actually exist. Now, this Christmas section has taken longer and is longer to read than about half of my normal episodes, so I think we should get straight into...

Top 10

Well, this all feels a bit more familiar. “thank u, next” by Ariana Grande is still at the top of the charts five weeks in, and it doesn’t really seem to have much competition.

Ava Max, however, is making a surprise run for the top, up four spots to number-two, with “Sweet but Psycho”. I wouldn’t exactly be complaining if this hit the top either.

“Without Me” by Halsey is up a spot to number-three.

We have a new entry from the most recent X Factor winner, Dalton Harris, with a cover of Frankie Goes to Hollywood’s Christmas classic “The Power of Love”, featuring James Arthur. I guess awful Christmas songs aren’t going away for that long, huh? Obviously this is Dalton’s first top 10, and Arthur’s fifth.

“Thursday” by Jess Glynne is down two spaces to number-three.

Up a whopping 28 spaces this week to number-six is, you guessed it, Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is You”. This isn’t its first top 10 turn, and it’s not its peak, but still impressive to reach here nonetheless.

This means “Woman Like Me” by Little Mix featuring Nicki Minaj is down five spaces to number-seven.

“Rewrite the Stars” by James Arthur and Anne-Marie has actually gained nine spaces, surprisingly, and to my dismay, to number-eight, becoming Arthur’s sixth and Anne-Marie’s fifth.

Oh, and if you wanted even worse news, up an even larger 29 spaces is “KIKA” by 6ix9ine featuring Tory Lanez, becoming both their first (and hopefully for 6ix9ine, only) top 10 hit at number-nine. I like the song, but I don’t like Tekashi, to say the least.

We have another new entry at #10 this week with “Nothing Breaks Like a Heart” by Mark Ronson featuring Miley Cyrus. This is Ronson’s sixth top 10 hit and Cyrus’ fourth (yeah, I thought she had more too).

Now, instead of separating what happened on the charts into Dropouts, Climbers, Returning Entries, Fallers and such, let’s separate into two sections: “What Survived” and “What Suffered”.

What Survived

What survived means essentially everything that still managed to chart this week, and I’m actually surprised by how much power some of these songs have. Going in reverse order, I have no idea how “Arms Around You” by XXXTENTACION, Lil Pump, Swae Lee and Maluma managed to cling on despite a 17-space fall to #40. “Promises” by Calvin Harris and Sam Smith is down 16 to #38, “Baby Shark” by Pinkfong is down four to #37, “Empty Space” by James Arthur is down 10 to #34 (why did James Arthur of all people have the strength to stay during the avalanche?), “Hold My Girl” by George Ezra is down eight to #33, “Shallow” by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper is down 27 to #32 (considering both streaming cuts and Christmas bloodbath), “Leave a Light On” by Tom Walker has returned to #31 for some reason, “when the party’s over” by Billie Eilish is down seven to #28 (again, surprised this one’s still here), “Taki Taki” by DJ Snake, Ozuna, Cardi B and Selena Gomez is down eight to #27, “1999” by Charli XCX and Troye Sivan is down 11 to #24, “Polaroid” by James Blue, Liam Payne and Lennon Stella is down 11 to #23, “Let You Love Me” by Rita Ora is down eight to #22, “Better” by Khalid is down five to #20, “Sunflower” by Post Malone and Swae Lee is down seven to #16, as is “ZEZE” by Kodak Black featuring Travis Scott and Offset right next to it at #15, “Funky Friday” by Dave and Fredo is down five to #12, and everything else that’s currently charting is either simply not notable (a drop or climb less than four spaces), in the top 10, a new arrival, a Christmas re-entry or in the top 10. Jesus. Now, what’s gone?

What Suffered

This is a little nicer name for what’s dropped out in the absolute onslaught of Christmas music and new arrivals (all returning and new entries this week total to 12 songs that weren’t on the chart before). This week was an absolute bloodbath, and these are the murder victims. Former #1 “Shotgun” by George Ezra is out from #30, “Advice” by Cadet and Deno Driz is out from #28, “AirForce” by Digdat is out from the #20 debut, “Mo Bamba” by Sheck Wes is out prematurely from #27, “This is Me” by Keala Settle and the Greatest Showman Ensemble is out again from #36, another former #1 “Eastside” by benny blanco, Halsey and Khalid is out from #31, “Happier” by Marshmello and Bastille is out from #32, “I Found You” by benny blanco and Calvin Harris is out from #29, “MIA” by Bad Bunny featuring Drake is out from #35, “Always Remember Us this Way” by Lady Gaga is out from #39, “Goodbye” by Jason Derulo and David Guetta featuring Nicki Minaj and Willy William is out from #40 and finally, “Back and Forth” by MK, Jonas Blue and Becky Hill is out from #37. I’d say it’s time to move onto the New Arrivals – but before, I’d like to say that the BBC redesigned their UK Top 40 page, and it looks pretty cool. Anyways:

NEW ARRIVALS

#29 – “MAMA” – 6ix9ine featuring Kanye West and Nicki Minaj

Of course, DUMMY BOY only had a stunted tracking week last week, so we have the effects of the album this week. This is 6ix9ine’s third top 40 hit in the UK, Nicki Minaj’s thirty-seventh (yeah, I know, it’s insane), and Ye’s even crazier forty-third, and to be honest, it’s inoffensive, which is something I’d never thought I’d say about a 6ix9ine song, but, hey, it is what it is. Murda Beatz’s production is pretty cool for what it is, and I do like the eerie synth loop. 6ix9ine’s delivery is lazy and boring – and I still think we shouldn’t let rappers say they kick women out of doors – but he doesn’t last long so when Kanye comes in with that “man, oh my God” refrain it gets so much better. I’m so used to Kanye West’s pop-culture rambling, social media criticism/obsession, somehow relating to women nonsense he brings to nearly every single verse he does recently that I’m used to it, it’s just something I’ve heard before delivered relatively comedically. Nicki’s refrain and verse actually has some work put into it, unlike the dudes’ bars, so yeah, I appreciate that, although her delivery and cadence is exhaustingly blunt and straightforward, to the point where it’s just kind of tiring. There’s some decent wordplay there, I guess. This is okay enough, and pretty much top-tier Tekashi to be honest. “KANGA” also featuring Ye is even better, though.

#17 – “Going Bad” – Meek Mill featuring Drake

Meek Mill and Drake working together is something I expected to happen anyway. Meek and Drake have seemingly squashed their beef and have relaxed after the “Back to Back” situation and their popular 2015/2016 beef that revealed a lot about Drake, specifically his ghostwriting from Quentin Miller, and eventually stressed Meek’s relationship with Nicki enough for them to break up as a result. Oh, and you better believe they mention “back to back” because of course they do, it’s the only funny wordplay they can conjure up, apparently. This is Meek Mill’s first ever top 40 hit in the UK (congratulations) and in stark contrast, Drake’s forty-fifth (yes, even more than Kanye), and his thirteenth just this year (probably and hopefully his last), and it’s mediocre. I didn’t know what to expect because I’ve never really cared enough about Meek to listen to him, but an out-of-tune piano absolutely demolished by some bass while Drake spouts off with stuff like “I got more slaps than the Beatles” isn’t exactly the best first impression. Is there a chorus here, or not? I can’t tell, everything’s just kind of the same until the ad-lib break that’s long enough for Genius to count it as an entirely different section of the song than in Meek’s verse. It was “Interlude” when I looked but it might be “Post-Chorus” now. Yeah, it should be clear I don’t care enough about this song. I do like Drake’s delivery in the hook, though, it’s pretty energetic, but not enough to save it.

#10 – “Nothing Breaks Like a Heart” – Mark Ronson featuring Miley Cyrus

So, yeah, I like this. It starts with some beautiful strings right before Miley Cyrus fades in with her country twang that I’m starting to really appreciate, and those guitars come in to complement her and the deeper bass that I like the addition of, it really contrasts the otherwise pretty light production, that seems to be dramatic but kind of unfitting for the lyrical content about how the world can hurt you but heartbreak is the worst possible thing, because despite the beat’s melodrama it’s too upbeat to really work here, I feel. Ah, well, the hook is pretty memorable, and the orchestral stings is just one little barely-noticeable production quirk that I can talk about, seriously, Mark Ronson puts so much effort into crafting these songs over the years, it’s pretty great. It may be a bit too repetitive and slow for my taste, but, yeah, I can dig this. Good song, just not much to say about it.

#4 – “The Power of Love” – Dalton Harris featuring James Arthur

The girl gets Leona Lewis, the Scouse dude gets Kaiser Chiefs, yet the WINNER gets James Arthur?! Really, James Arthur? Poor dude. You must know you’re an amazingly talented singer when you get James Arthur put on your song and you still make a surprisingly decent winner’s single, hell, even win in the first place. Arthur is such an awful vacuum of talent, I was scared Harris would be affected by this but no, even with my half-bothering with the show this year I can tell he’s been consistently great, and he’s definitely not bad on here either, although the production has no unique charm to it and is just plastic Syco production as you expect, with James Arthur bringing an above-average performance (this means still pretty bad) with his moaning and straining that just pains me to listen to. Seriously, James, let’s have a cactus-to-man talk and let me teach you how to not sound like my dead cat who just popped some Xanax.

Conclusion

Worst of the Week goes to Dalton Harris and James Arthur for “The Power of Love” – at least “Going Bad” has some energy and legitimate soul to it, although Meek Mill and Drake still get Dishonourable Mention. Mark Ronson and Miley Cyrus take Best of the Week home for “Nothing Breaks Like a Heart”, and hell Kanye and Nicki made “MAMA” bearable enough for them and 6ix9ine to get Honourable Mentions. See ya next week, where we’ll probably see a few more Christmas songs. Delightful.

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treveesamoe-blog · 6 years ago

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august 20th 2018

i got back from hawaii this morning. alot has happeneed since my last entry and a lot is soon to be happened. in two days exactly because thats when i move into my apartment and start my sophomore year at lmu. i honestly cant remember what it was like to be in college or go to school. i always say and think this but i feel so different now. i feel like im just in the passenger seat of life letting it take me wherever it feels. i feel like there isnt control and ive given up trying to harnass it the way i envision it. im tired. im bleh. i dont allow myself to be sad or mad or happy or anything. id say most of my present is dedicated to anxiety. for a month now on and off ive had this awful wobbly like im on a boat feeling. imm convinced it has something to do with my inner ear. but i also just think its a perfect storm too. i have too much sodium in my diet (my world famous top ramen really did that), i dont eat enough protein or enough in general, im detoxing my body from 2 years of weed abuse plus adderall plus nicotine plus coke. and i was surfing in rough waves and driving to high elevations and back down to sea level and then back up and then down and then through curvy roads on the road to hana. and i start school in a few days and im nervous about what its gonna be this year. at the same time im kinda just like well summer is gonna end and its all gonna be over soon no matter my feelings so why not just let this wave take me wherever. im not sure if this is a healthy mindset. i just wanna live in the present. like in SKAM when isak says “life is now”. life is in this moment that im writing this entry. life is in the now. and im determined to keep myself in the now not floating to the darkest or most nostalgic parts of my past or the fears or expecations of my future. im just gonna enjoy what is around me now. whenever now is. thats my goal.

i picked up my “HEAT” bomber jacket from grandma today and we ended up looking through her moms and grandma’s memory boxes. hard to put into words how meaningful that was. family really is everything. i love my grandma and ive realized she deserves to be protected from my demons, even if i dont always see them that way. see look im actually honest in these entries lol. i have such a rough choice ahead of me telling her and my dad. i just want to enjoy how it is now before i taint it with who i was born to love. i choose my grandma over unhealthy worldy desires. i want to make her proud. and that means not settling, but finding my guy. someone im proud of and that lifts me up. hes out there and i know hes fun and cute and happy and i know hes waiting for me too. i trust the universe will bring me to him when the time is right and the stars align haha. for now im just gonna focus on my health and school. love can come find me. and i know it will not when im waiting for my life to begin but when im running with it.

in other universe news, i prayed that the universe would put a boy in my life and it HAPPENED lmaoo. honestly doesnt even seem real that it happened but it really did. so this guy chris that i met on tinder (lol i know tinder gross stupid dum whatever but hey, it put him on my radar and im not complaining). anyways he was at the same resort town as me in maui this past week with all his friends! how crazy is that! hes the one guy thats been on my mind for a while now and we both end up in hawaii right next to eachother at the same time?? thats freaky universe stuff right there idc. hes going to lmu next year which im excited about but not too excited lol we know what happened with instagram matt last year when i got too hyped. so im just keeping this one as a friend.he even called it a “perfect start to a magical friendship” lmaooo. ok but the tea is that ive been saying to katherine that i wanna be friends with him at lmu. so at least were on the same page about (even though he beat me to it the little bitch haha). it was fun though hanging out with him. i mean it took me getting caught sneaking out and getting yelled at and having my sister and my mom guard the door at night and curfews but hey i got to spend a few hours with him and it was so easy. hes cute too. not that great of a nose but i actually dont even care. great eyes. and hes funny. i just feel like its always awkward with guys like occidental matt where i can barely stand the awkward tension between us. occidental matt is perfect for me looks wise but when i take that away im annoyed by him haha. he isnt funny (or at least my kind of funny.. which by the way is hilarious like if u dont think im funny then ur stupid sorry) and hes boooorriiingggg. and possesive. and moody. blah blah blah i dont need that in my life. i want someone im excited to see. it sucks though cuz im really just not talking to anyone rn. i realized that i just go from one “online boyfriend” to the next because im nervous to not be talking to someone. but thats so weakkk like thats not how i need to live. im choosing to live my own life and love my own self and take care of my self before searching the fake internent for my soul mate. this years about me. about what i can do without drugs and in good health. im determined, and im ready. hahaha okdramatic im always ending these like this. OH WAIT. scatterbrain alert bitch i didnt even finish what happened with chris and his friends. ok so i met him in the lobby and we hugged. we immediatly started talking wiht no awkwardness. he did stumble on his words though at first. i thought it was cute. then we went upand i said hi to his friends and we made cookies with the oreos in the middle and listened to mama mia (gayyyy) and took fireball shots and i drank BEER LOL. then we took the beers on the beach and i bummed a cigarrete off of some rich drunk white ladies. chris said i was smooth. i felt powerful with him,like my full smooth self. likei was light on my feet or something. then we sat at a bench and the softest orange cat walked over to me from far away and let me pet her. ok dont laugh but i really think that was the universe that sent that cat to remind me thats what brought me to that moment. it was like a hello. i just got the chills thinking about that haha im so dramaticcc. then this blonde drunk girl came up to us and we immediatly connected on a spiritual level. she gave me her purple and white lei and she talked about how she couldnt handle her family anymore,but she loves them. then my mom had to pick me up and i said bye to everyone. i guess she smoked chris and his friends out later that night which is so chill haha if only i still smoked weed. i cant beleive that was my life for more than a year. so weird. stoner trevor what a phaseee.

well thats all i got tonight. this was such a scatterbrained shit post but now at least i dont have to worry about forgetting any of this. goodnight future trevor.

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captain-spookycandycollecti-blog · 7 years ago

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First car/insurance question?

"First car/insurance question?

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I am getting ready to buy a house and I am getting ready to switch my car insurance into my own name from my parents. I have to add homeowner insurance on to the policy. If I stay with the same company will I have to pay money down like for a deposit?

Why did my car insurance rates suddenly double?

I am almost 40, have a spotless driving record, have the same car, haven't changed the policy, and haven't moved. So how can my insurance agent just up my rates all of the sudden and not give me an answer why. He just says that things change. Is there an industry standard or can agents just screw with us at will? I have been with this WELL known insurance company for 4 years. This isn't some guy working out of his garage. Any experts out there that can shed some light on this for me. I am shopping around for new insurance as i type.""

Car insurance?

which insurance provider gives the cheapest insurance for 18 yr olds

Cheapest Car Insurance Deal For A 17Year Old In The UK?

Car Insurance: Which is cheapest in America?

Just purchased brand new vehicle and wanted some feedback on which companies offer inexpensive rates and superior service when needed.

How much will the insurance cost?

Yamaha DT50MX, how much will the insurance cost, Monthly or yearly also monthly wise how much do people spend on petrol?""

What's the best company to get individual health insurance? What organizations offer group health plan?

I am talking about health insurance that covers doctors, prescriptions, and hospital expenses.""

Can group health insurance deny for Pre existing?

I'm on my moms insurance and she's moving jobs and her new insurance is going to be group coverage blue cross, can group coverage deny you coverage for Pre existing or only private? Why's the difference between group and private? Thanks!""

I'm 17 and just past my driving test does any body know where you can get cheap car insurance?

Question about car insurance? (Progressive)?

So I am 19 and currently on my parents car insurance plan still. When I moved out the first time they put a hold on my car insurance because I didn't feel the need to have a car while living downtown. I moved back in with my parents for a few months to look for a new place and I got back on the insurance and now I am about to move out again permanently back to the city but this time I want to take my car with me. I will be changing my primary address and getting a new drivers license for that state (My family is in Indiana and I am moving back to Chicago). I will be going to school full time in that state as well as living there so my question is... does anyone know if I can stay on my parents car insurance if I am no longer living in their home/state?

""I totaled my month old car with only liability insurance, do I still HAVE to pay off the car?""

i just got a '01 explorer from a dealer less than a month ago, two days ago i rolled it, now its totaled. i only have LIABILITY insurance, and the insurance company said i have to pay off the rest of the car, which i expected, but when i called the dealer she said she might be able to count the car as a total loss, and get me in another car from them, without paying for the old one anymore. she is going to let me know in a couple days if they can. is this possible to just somehow avoid all the payments on the old car and start over new? are they scared i would end up not paying them for a car i dont have, so they somehow write it off and start a new payment plan on a whole new car? Will they try to get me in a new car and pile on my old car payments with new ones? when they call back should i act like i wont pay on that car to persuade them to write that totaled car off ? i dont know what to do, i cant afford two car payments and now im carless bumming rides which i cant do for long. The reason i am asking before the lady gets back to me is: its a dealer, and im pretty inexperienced with this, and i just want to know how this all works so i know how to talk to and possibly negotiate with the dealer before i end up missing (or screwing up) an opportunity before its too late""

Where I can get best auto insurance rates ?

Please find me a good web site to get some details about best auto insurance rates . For my research this data will be useful to me. thank you

First car/insurance question?

Sr22 insurance Texas?

I need an sr22 insurance for Texas, but a cheap one. Any tip?""

Auto Insurance agents in Tennessee... Does my 17 year old with a permit?

need to be listed on my policy? I have heard several different answers to this. Also, I've heard he has to be listed but the insurance company cannot rate him until he gets his license, therefore, they cannot charge me more for him. Any help is greatly appreciated.""

Can my Health Insurance cover for my Car Insurance?

I currently have AmeriChoice as my health Insurance and High Point as my car Insurance. Does anybody know how this works? I've some people say that they have their car ins. with their health ins. and they end up paying less $$ for their car Ins. Help!

How much does it cost the average person to keep and maintain a CAR in a day?

including petrol, MOT, buying the car, insurance, washing, oil, air, tyres, extras eg booster, radio, or say how much money it would altogether cost a year then i can divide it :) THANK YOU xx by the way if you are wondering which car make well one that costs average""

""1959 dodge coronet car insurance help, read details?""

first car, going under my own name and im starting my own insurance acount, im 20 years old, does anyone have an idea of how much i would be paying every year? i havent fully bought the car yet and wanted some opinions and guesstimates of how much ill be paying for her. get back to me, thanks.""

How much does roofers insurance cost? I'm a one-man show for residential work looking for the cheapest policy?

Where can I get started with Motorcycle Insurance Thanks.?

I just got my brand new 150cc Moped where can get started with Motorcycle Insurance and what information do I need. Another questionI want be riding my moped almost everyday and I know you have to pay to keep up your insurance will this effect your licenses if your not paying for insurance Thanks.

Can anyone tell me the average cost of sr22 insurance in Arizona?

I've been searching the web and I can't seem to find the answer.

New Insurance coverage?

ok im having a really hard time calling these people and getting no answers. its plain and simple. I have health insurance through my mother. I recently had a baby and i was told he will only be covered for 2 months and after that i will have to get his own coverage. Now the question is this. I want to get my own insurance so he can be under my name, meaning i want to be off the one my parents have me under. is that possible? and if otherwise, would i have to put him under my moms or what?""

Auto Insurance?

Can a person have auto insurance in one state but live in another?

Sue other persons car insurance company!

I was hit from the back while sitting in traffic and the insurance company did not pay to fix my car. how would i go about suing that insurance company and what do i need?

About how much do you think my car insurance will cost?

my parents just switched to liberty mutual, I have a car, a blue 99 manual chevy cavalier and I'm 18. I'm trying to figure out how much money from my job I need to save up before I get my license, because I have to pay my own insurance and I've had my permit for a year and a half because I couldn't find a job until last month. I just want a guesstimate please!""

What is the difference between permanent life insurance and whole life insurance?

I'm taking a class on finance, and I'm really confused about this concept. If it helps, here's what my textbook says: Permanent life insurance continues until the premiums are stopped or the death benefits are paid out. The cash value of the insurance increases as the premiums accumulate. With whole life insurance, the premiums, death benefits, and cash value of the insurance remain fixed. At the time of the insured's death, the cash value of the insurance becomes the insurance company's and the death benefits are paid to the beneficiaries.""

How much does car insurance cost per month?

Do you know how can I find out the cheapest car insurance without having to find an insurance broker? So far I got geico, progressive and all state quotes online but I find it expensive. I want prices from multiple insurers. Thanks.""

How much will it costs me to cancel my Car Insurance?

Hi guys, I pay monthly installments on my car insurance and renewed my policy on 2nd February. Anyhow to cut a long story short I've bought a house with my fiancee and I work in Leeds now, and figured that it's cheaper to buy a monthly ticket for the train than it is to drive there, so want to cancel my insurance asap. I rang my insurance firm and they didn't give me an exact cost, only an admin fee of 29.95 to cancel, but mentioned that it is carried out on a 'pro-rata' basis. What does this mean and how much roughly am I looking to pay? I pay 51.00 a month at the moment...I'm confused.com! Thanks guys!! D""

Will this affect my insurance cost?

I'm 22 and just received my 1st ticket today in 6 years of driving. I made an illegal turn, I turned left instead of the traditional right. I've never had a ticket before and especially one for such a minor infraction of the law. Will this affect my insurance rate?""

""I need some cheap car insurance. I have a 2005 suburvan, a 97 chev pickup and a 97 mercury tracer.?""

I need some cheap car insurance. I have a 2005 suburvan, a 97 chev pickup and a 97 mercury tracer.?""

What kind of vehicle would have the cheapest insurance?

I need to buy a new car, and have pretty high insurance. I was wondering what types of vehicles would have the cheapest insurance for a newer car (2000+)""

Car insurance if I don't drive?

My mom is taking me off of her car insurance policy since I no longer own a car, don't have a job to get one or pay gas, and don't even live with her anymore. Yesterday I got my drivers license address changed to my current address which is with my boyfriend. Now his family is making a big deal about it saying that even if I'm not driving, it's illigal to have a licensed driver living in their house with no car insurance and that I have to be under insuarance. This dosnt make any sense to me. Is it even true or are they misinformed? Please help!!!""

I'm nineteen and looking for good somewhat affordable health insurence?

looking for people who are happy with their health isurence to share their experiences. thanks

Where can I find the cheapest insurance for young drivers?

I am looking for the cheapest insurance for young drivers in United Kingdom. I am 18 years old and I am planning to buy a car. I have been looking for an insurance for Golf Mk 4 1.9 TDi which costs up to 3000 but the cheapest insurance I could find was also over 3000 up to 5000. Tell me the cheapest you know, please.""

Where i can get very cheapest motorcycle insurance?

i bay a motorcycle and my dad don't agree to give some money for my insurence

Insurance when your pregnant?

I currently have insurance although October 1st my coverage will be terminated because I left my job. I recently found out that I was pregnant and was wondering how I will get insurance and will my pregnancy be considered pre-existing when I get insurance through a private company. Should I try to go to the doctor while I have my current insurance through work or wait until I have new insurance

Will adding a person to my car insurance (progressive direct) make it go up? by how much?

i want to add my wife and she's 24

""Best insurance for my small business? im 25, non registered business 0-10 jobs per week.?""

Best insurance for my small business? im 25, non registered business 0-10 jobs per week.?""

First car/insurance question?

""If I had a company, and I had to pay for car insurance out of the capital...?""

Would the car insurance be counted as an 'expense', 'liability', or an 'overhead'? Also, if possible, could you provide an explanation as to what each term means exactly? Many thanks! :-)""

Insurance resposibility?

I am a policyholder of a vehicle, and if someone borrow my vehicle and cause a accident, who will be responsible for paying the damage, his ins or mine. and what happend if he does not have insurance coverage""

Need insurance advice?

First time driver I have tools to carry so will need a good engine Insurance is high so - What's a good engined car with cheap insurance? I have researched but still need all the help I can get. :/

I was just wondering if anyone knows how much your car insurance goes up if you have been into an accident?

Can a car insurance company ask you if you have health insurance when you make a claim?

I was in an accident recently and the other insurance company asked me if I had health insurance. I was not at fault. Can they do that?

Moped/ motorcycle insurance in washington?

how much is insurance for it? i already have a car and car insurance. my car doesnt get great mileage. about 15-17 on the highway.12-15 city. i use to not travel a distance too much but i moved farther away from my college so i gas up once a week or every week and a half depending on if im just going to school or if im also going out. I want a scooter or motorcyle just because there fun and better on gas. im not reckless. ill be safe and drive them to minimize the risk as much as possible. MY STATE DOES NOT REQUIRE MOPED OR MOTORCYLCE INSURANCE BY LAW. Im just curious to be safe. and for me, my faith in god keeps me safe.""

Should Teens Have To Wait Till 18 To Get A Drivers License?

I look at it this way. I almost if not all states, you have to be 18 to enter into a binding contract. So basically that means my son can't borrow $500 from the bank, but can be responsible for a 3,000+ Lbs. of steel on wheels. I just don't see why driving is the exception to the rule. In my state, a person over 70 has to take a written test.. The same given to new drivers, one time before they get a license. So does anyone agree with this? Or if you don't, why?""

I just got a new car and was wondering what is the cheapest insurance?

I just got a new car and was wondering what is the cheapest insurance? I need some cheap Insurance that won't charge alot besides USAA is there anyone else out there that will give me a good price I am currently 20 years old and I need a good insurance company that wil not charge alot besides USAA I have a dodge stratus 2004 it's a V6 it's an SE it's a 4 door and 2.7 liters it's the biggest engine you can get with a stratus anyways if any of you could help me out that would be great thanks.

How much did your car insurance drop once you turned 25 yrs old?

Did you save 50%? 25%? Less? I noticed a significant drop when I turned 21 and saved about 40% then. What can I expect next year when I turn 25? Obviously it varies and will depend on if my driving record remains clean....just wanted to get some idea

How much does the cheapest insurance cost for a honda fit in the US?

i heard that cars r pretty cheap in the US, but insurance is a must they say??!, im from south east asia, and they sell cars triple the price here but dont required insurance, so how much is the average insurance for a honda fit in springfield virginia???""

How do i become an insurance agent in california?

Can my mom insure my vehicle?

I want to buy a newly used car and i will have a loan on it. I wanted to know if the loan and the title are all in my name, would my mom be able to insure it in her name and me just as a driver? im under 25 so my insurance would be extra high. and would i have to register it in her name at DMV to let her insure it?""

Can An unlicensed person buy auto insurance for their car and have other drivers?

My husband owns a car but has no drivers license at this time. He wants to insure his car and have friends drive. Is this possible?

Why do kids with lower grades pay more for car insurance?

And would a kid with a C average compared to a kid with a A average pay the same after 1 year of both them having a clean driving record and no accidents... if not that is bs.... grades shouldn't come into play it should be how good of a driver you are its unfair to do that I am so sick and tired of how good grades get you this that..... I have a c- average in high school and i dont do any drugs or alcohol or w/e.I workout on a daily basis,eat right, and i am extremely physically fit. I really just hate school and never put my mind to it.""

Does anyone know any cheap car insurance for 17 year olds in the UK?

Hi, I need some insurance for my Ford Fiesta 1999. I have been looking at some insurance qoutes but there still VERY expensive ( Around 6000-10000 ) I would love to get around 2000 for my car as i know its possible but i just need to find a insurer. Does anyone know any? Thanks""

""Cheap car insurance, I'm 21 had my license 2months?""

Hi I'm in the uk, I'm male, 21, had my license 2months and I need cheap car insurance please.""

Home insurance?

I am buying a home. How do I find a home insurance company? Will my mortgage company help me with that?

Car insurance... HAVE THEY GONE MAD?

Basically I am 16 and looking to buy a car that needs work, so that I have a car for when I pass my driving test. I have pretended I was born a year earlier which would make me 17 and eligible for insurance, but all the other details are true. I have also added my dad on the policy and the cheapest I got quoted was nearly 4000, and it's not like i'm going to be driving a rocket ship its a 1989 subaru justy 1.2l engine, which I have valued at 500 (double what its worth). Thus I am struggling to see why it costs so much?? BTW IT'S FIRE AND THEFT NOT EVEN FULLY COM""

""%100 liable for totaled vehicle, very low settlement. help please?""

The auto insurance company says i am 100% liable to the damages, received mail from the auto insurance company, it said im responsible for 18000 for the vehicle however they will pay any 3rd party damages i hit a traffic light and rear ended a car . I called them to ask for payment options and they offered me 13000 one time payment and its settled. Why is it so cheap? im very confused""

""How much do you spend on car expenses (gas, insurance, etc.) every month?""

So I'm thinking of getting a car and just wondering how much just as an average estimate it costs people every month when you add car payments, gas, insurance, and whatever else like carwashes and oil changes. I know it's different for everybody...how much for you?""

How much will a insurance be for a student in Alberta?

Hi, I'm turning 16 in September and is planning to get my licence right away. I haven't bough a vehicle yet, however, I'm planning to buy a car with a price range of 1000-2000 for used car. I didn't take any drivers training, I live in Alberta and I'm also a male. Around How much will my insurance be per month?""

Cheapest possible car insurance...?

I'm just about to get my license, I have next to no experience. My parents aren't offering to pay ANY, yet they are nearly forcing me to get my license, which is next to insurance. Everyone is telling me my only option is to pay like 200 frickin bucks a month. I can't spend that much money, I don't have time to earn that much money, It's almost a hopeless situation. Anyone have a miracle remedy to this problem?""

What's the best auto insurance you can get for a female under 25?

I had Liberty Mutual. I got a low premium because of my parents but when the taxes went up they totally jacked up my premium. Plus their customer service is TERRIBLE and they're grimy. So then I went to Progressive - One lady helped me get my policy, then I called them for another reason and another rep. said I didn't even get the best quote I could've gotten. I'm kind done with these brand name insurance companies. I was looking into one called Elephant insurance but I'm not sure if it's actually any good. Does anyone know anything about them? Is there any other company I can try? I'm 20, I turn 21 next month. I've never had an accident. And I don't know what my credit score is or if I even have one yet (I'm working on it.)""

How do I go about getting car insurance in another state?

I live in new york, i want to get car insurance in another state like maryland or delaware, i have friends in each state. What do i need to get car insurance there? Please help me...lots of details please...thank you""

Cheap insurance for a 17 year old?

Is there any hope of me insuring a group 14 insurance car? I don't care how crappy the insurance is as long as its legal. All the quotes I have been getting are ridiculous.

First car/insurance question?

How much do you think my motorcycle insurance will be?

I am getting the CBR125R 2009 HONDA! It's going to be black. I'm a 16 year old girl, and the bike costs $3,599.00 . How much do you think my insurance will be? All together what will it possibly total up to? Thank you!""

Should I get health insurance?

I'm going to be 18 in a few months and I'm trying to figure out if it'll be cheaper to get health insurance or not get health insurance. I'm on 3 prescriptions, every 3 months I have to get an MRI and CT scan, and every 6 months, I visit my eye doctor. Would it be cheaper to have health insurance and pay them monthly or just pay the doctor bills on my own? Sources?""

Can you haggle auto insurance?

I currently have Allstate for my auto insurance and have a local office and agent. I like having a local office but I recently got a quote from Geico that was over $150 less for 6 months than what I currently pay for the same coverage from Allstate. My question is, if I walk into my local Allstate office and show my agent the lower quote I got will he be able to give me a comparable rate with the same coverage to keep me as a customer or does he not have it in his power to do that? I have never had an accident or even a ticket and always pay my bills on time. I also have excellent credit. I'm just looking to lower my insurance rates.""

California Auto Insurance Cancellation?

How soon after an insurance company cancels an auto policy for non-payment will they report that cancellation to the dmv? I understand the electronic notification, but how quickly will the insurance company actually notify the dmv that the party is no longer covered? I have yet to receive a notification from dmv and my policy was cancelled 2 months ago. Unfortunately, I was involved in an accident (my fault) and although I provided a copy of my policy info, I found out later that I was not covered at the time of the accident. I had the policy Rewritten the day after the accident (a different policy number). The other party reported it to their insurance, although we agreed to settle with cash & no insurance. They are requesting me to file an SR1 file. What do I do? The info I provided had good dates of coverage on it but I found out later that my policy had lapsed. Do I submit an SR1 with the old info or new info? Will my license be suspended now??? IM DESPERATE!""

Any reason for a sudden hike in insurance quote prices?

Hello i've been looking through insurance quotes as i have my renewal coming up, i was possibly thinking of getting a different car so been fishing around, especially on my current insurers website for quotes. A couple of days ago i was getting nice quotes i was happy with for all the cars i was searching including my own. However tonight the majority of the quotes i am getting have increased by 600-700? All my details are exactly the same, its actually made me quite depressed as i have no idea how this has happened. Would anyone know why this may be?""

What is life insurance?

Life insurance is suppose to be used as a protection of income. In case you die, your family is protected from devastation of substantial income loss. But, many insurance companies are selling it as an additional source of income or as an investment, which is really is not. Therefore, many families who have life insurance are underinsured because these cash value life insurance are very expensive. If you are using life insurance solely for the purpose of saving up for a goal or emergency, why aren't you investing it in mutual funds or put it into an IRA? If you are afraid of the stock market, then open a money market account. If you are saving up for your kids education, then open a 529 plan. All these alternative ways are better than keeping your money in a life insurance because you never have to pay it back if you use them. As to life insurance, if you use any of the cash value, you will have to pay it back with interest.""

How much will my dads insurance go up?

my dad himself has only been insured for 2 years and his insurance is currently 2400 for 12 months. im 17 yeas old and want to be added to the insurance and add a car. how much extra do you think it will be?

Cheapest auto insurance in Florida??

Just moved and need some ideas for shopping around for the cheapest auto insurance in Florida.

What is the average price for insurance for an APRILIA RS 125?

what is the average price for insurance for an APRILIA RS 125 thinking of getting one but need to know a rough average

Hip but affordable places for young couples to live?!?

My boyfriend and I are talking about moving; at the moment we live in central Pennsylvania. The only thing keeping us here is our families. We would like to move to an affordable area, either a small city or large town. Somewhere that has good jobs, and local colleges or universities since I'm still in college and lots of jobs. Also we want an area that offers a lot of activities, especially outdoors. All suggestions are welcome!""

How much would insurance cost on a 96 Chevrolet camaro?

Monthly? I spotted a camaro for the first time and it was completely gorgeous, I almost cried. it also runs good. The cost is pretty crazy for a camaro only 2,000. My mom said that I could not get it because the insurance is high I asked her how high and she said about 3,000 a month also I'm 16. I get the feeling she is wrong how much would you say insurance on a 96 camaro would cost?""

Has anyone ever had short term car insurance ?

how much is it ? i work alot in the summer so i only need a car for a month please help am new to this.

Car insurance????????

I am a 16 year old boy and for my first car I got a 2005 mustang GT. All of the quotes I have gotten for insurance are between 4000 - 7000 a year. How can I get a much lower price for car insurance. ( please don`t say get a different car )

Best insurance for Male 18-24?

What is the best type of insurance for a male 18-24. There is a basic prepaid one for $1200 (upfront) but my rates double if I get a speeding ticket etc.. Then there is the traditional one from my bank but that's $300 a month and I can't do that. What type should I be looking for? Also, is it worth it to get the cheap insurance if my rates could potentially double? Could I fight them doubling my rates. I don't plan on speeding but wow. 04-06 Hyundai Elantra GLS/GT.""

Can I go on my boyfriends health insurance florida?

I am living with my boyfriend for a year can I go on his health insurance

""How much does Motorcycle Insurance cost in Ontario, Canada or in your area?""

Hi, I'm planning to get either a Motorcycle License or a Private Aircraft License. I know for a fact that the minimum cost of a Private Aircraft License is around $10,000 CND for ground school, 40 hours in an airplane and your examination. From then on its around $120 CND for an hour in a Cessna. My question is, How much is a Motorcycle insurance? I heard its a lot and that is the reason why i'm choosing between these two licenses. - I am 16 (17 in December) - Grade 11 (86% avg) - Toronto, ONtario - I have my g1 and so far no tickets or accidents -Planning to get either a 2008 Ninja 250R or Honda CBR125R Thanks So how much will insurance will cost me?""

Is it illegal to have car insurance from Florida if you live in New York?

I'm a new driver and was interested in getting car insurance through my grandmother's policy in Florida, I have a mailing address out there and visit Florida once a year, but live in New York.""

Whats is the best life insurance policy for me?

I'm 20 years old and I'm married with 2 children. My husband and I are wanting to buy life insurance but our research is confusing. I need the basics and the best option for my family

Best renters insurance in california?

What's the cheapest insurance i can get?

I live in NYC, i'll be 18 in feb next year and i want to know how much i would have to pay for it. I can't be under someone else's insurance. I don't even have a car yet but it probably won't be anything over 7000 and probably 1990's or early 2000's. Thanks.""

What is the best way to recruit people to become insurance agents?

I recruit people for Farmers Insurance to become insurance agents. We train and help finance them to open their own insurance office. I'm doing this within a 30 mile radius of ...show more

Car insurance for temporary work in California?

I have a 4 months of temporary work in California and I am thinking of taking my car. My current car insurance will not cover driving for work purposes in California. What is the easiest way to get car insurance for 4 months for California?

I need a knee surgery? if i get medical insurance. it will cover the 5500 i need?

my question is when i get interviewed for insurance, should i not tell him about the bad knee so they will take me? i know the surgery will help and i can just wait a month and say i had a sporting accident?""

Cheap health insurance?

what is the cheapest health insurance in california? i am male 22, i do not smoke..""

Will my insurance cover all my mole removals?

I know my insurance covers mole removal, but I have quite a few on my face and neck that I want removed. I'm talking to a dermatologist next week. I was just curious if they would cover multiple at a time. I'm talking like 20-30.""

First car/insurance question?

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/what-do-you-recommend-cheap-car-insurance-me-marieke-fleming"

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