#i've been burned before in getting excited about writing a story
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stahl-herz · 3 months ago
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Trick or treat! 🎃
This is late, but: send an ask with "Trick or treat!" to the writer who reblogged this & you could receive: sneak-peek at a WIP, this case is another part of How much change does a Ripple make?'. A snippet from earlier in the story.
“Well, you’re the only one here that can see me, right?” She smiled at his nod of confirmation. “So, I’d like for everyone here to have an idea of what I look like. Please?”
Richard straightened his tie, turned around and practically lunged at the chalkboard. He proceeded to draw… a picture. To say it looked like an artistic representation of a goblin would be flattery. It barely looked like her! With a heavy sigh, she slid off the table and tried not to show how disappointed she felt.
“I guess a deal’s a deal. But shouldn’t everyone here introduce themselves?”
She glanced around the room, and the small table looked even more crowded than before. Some of the royalty looked like they were being squished between their neighbors. A red haired woman looked like she was trying very hard not to elbow the Asian woman beside her in the face. A few people were sitting with notepads behind the table, no doubt ready to take notes of the proceedings. Every person in the room (besides her) had that greyish tone to their skin! Was this just… something to do with their status? Was it genetic? She had so many questions about this!
“Right, Astrid is requesting that everyone introduce themselves. And I’d say that it’s a brilliant way to kill two birds with one stone.” Richard glanced around the room to see everyone nod.
The names of everyone blurred together for Astrid. She didn’t doubt that she would have to ask Richard to reintroduce her to most of them. She couldn’t help the grin that threatened to split her face when it was the blond woman’s turn.
“I am Eleanor Ségolène Clark the First. I am the Representative, Sword, Shield and First Queen of Canada. Yes, the moose in the stables is mine. His name is Bullwinkle-“
“Hmph, not as good as Lucy. I’d love to show you how she can breathe fire! Oh wait, I’m not allowed to bring her here.” The dust covered man beside her grumbled.
“At least my moose, James,’ She looked the man in the eye, and smiled. “isn’t a fire hazard. Which is why Lucy can’t come here, in case your tiny little brain forgot.”
I don’t know why, but I half expected people to either laugh or ‘cough’ in response to Eleanor’s response to James’ remark. But, instead, the creak of chairs shifting under people’s weight, a few sighs, and some muffled sounds of annoyance met my ears. Signe had also shifted in his chair, but in a way that suggested he was ready to get out it? A few people even glared in Eleanor and James’ direction, with the only Asian woman in the room giving a disapproving frown. She was tapping what looked like a folded fan in her hand. She would’ve looked indifferent to the events unfolding between these two, but her grip on the handle of the fan was so tight that her knuckles looked bone-white. Even Richard briefly looked upward, as if asking God for patience, before he cleared his throat.
“You’re mangy moose-“
“I do believe,’ Richard interrupted, “that it’s your turn, James?” He gestured toward the tanned man.
Said man straightened in his chair, rubbed his animal tooth arm band absently, gave an aggravated sigh and nodded.
“Hello, I am James Walker the First. I’m the Representative, and First King of Australia. I share my Sword and Shield with my sister Keri, who isn’t here today. Lucy is my pet crocodile. Yes, she can breathe fire. And it’s a tactical advantage, Eleanor.” He shoots Eleanor a glare and crossed his arms. “I’ve introduced myself, so you can mark the board, aye?”
Richard nods and makes a note on the board. The rest of the royalty introduced themselves. It turns out the black haired man beside Signe was Sasha Lebedev, the Czar of Russia! The last person to introduce themselves was Signe, who turned out to be the King of Sweden. At Richard’s mark of ‘present’ beside Signe’s name, the meeting began.
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reareaotaku · 9 months ago
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Superboy vs Robin
Summary: The life of 3 best friends that get confused when realizing they have a crush on their other friend, Y/n Prince, daughter of Wonder Woman Pairings: Jon Kent x Fem! Reader, Damian Wayne x Fem! Reader Tw: Love V [NOT TRIANGLE!!! IT'S A 'V'], Slow Burn? Taglist: N/a
Pt II: Love in High Places | Pt III: Apple of My Eye
[This probably would have been better to write as a multi-part story instead of a one-shot, so I can really get the slow burn and such... Might make a part 2 if yall like this? Also hope this isn't bad because I've been wanting to write this for over a year....]
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You had met the two boys when in the league's spaceship. Your mother was on business and sent you off to do, as she put it 'Children things', before taking off with Batman and Green Lattern. You rolled your eyes at her dismissal, but decided to find something else to do. Besides, hero work was boring anway. Nothing interesting about discussing rules and such anyway.
You walked around the large spaceship, before coming across a particular room. In the room where two kids, boys, around your age you didn't recognize. One of the boys, the one in darker clothes, must have felt your presence, because the second you stepped in he turned around.
Damian knew who you were. He knew who everyone was. He would look like a real fool if he didn't know the daughter of Wonder-woman. Too bad the same couldn't be said for Jon.
You awkwardly stand at the door way, now having both the boys' attention on you. You awkwardly wave, "Hey."
Jon's face lights up and he rushes to you. He loved meeting new people and you were nothing short of pretty. "Hi!" He grabs your hand, engulfing it with his own. "I'm Jon, Jon Kent."
"Y/n Prince." You tried to keep up with his handshake, but he was fast and strong, and by the time you could gather what was going on he had already let your hand go.
You looked past Jon back at the emo boy, but he was just staring at you. Jon looked over to see what you were looking at, before gesturing towards his friend.
"Oh, that's Damian. Don't mind him. He's.... Shy."
"I'm not shy. I just don't have any reason to speak to her."
Jon gasps, before glaring at his friend, "That's rude, Damian." He turns back to you, his face flushed in embarrassment. "I'm sorry about him. He's not good with people."
You nod, still staring at Damian. "He's Batman's kid, right? The son of those assassins?"
Damian's eyes widen, but only for a brief second. He could let such an emotion out.
"My mother mentioned it a while ago. She didn't say much, just that you were... Different."
"Yeah, he is different." Jon jokes, causing you both to chuckle, but Damian just rolls his eyes.
---
You and Jon stuck your faces to the fish tank. Neither of you had ever seen a fish tank before. You were both stuck in the house by your parents in fear of you revealing yourselves on accident. Your parents have isolated you both- Even Damian was isolated, but he wasn't as naive and foolish as you and Jon.
"Oh, that one's purple," You point to a triangle-shaped fish.
"No, it's a dark blue," Jon argues, causing you to side-eye him.
You rolled your eyes, but don't respond.
"Hey, Y/n."
"Yeah, Jon?"
He looks over at you, wide eyed and excited, "You ever been Tire-rolling?"
"Tire-rolling?"
---
"I don't know if this is a good idea, Jon-" You try and reason, as your hands grip the tire's rubber.
He smiles, his hands gripping the tire, "Oh, it'll be fun. Promise!" He then pushes you, but instead of pushing you at a normal strength, he accidentally uses his super strength and sends you flying. His eyes widen as his mouth drops, before he runs after you, hoping you don't get hurt.
You scream as the tire jumps and hits multiple things while going faster than you've ever gone before. You grip the inside of the tire so hard, that you can feel your nails digging into your palm. You hear cars honking, but there's nothing you can do, without using your powers.
Though, luck must have been on your side, because while you're mid way in the air, something goes through the tire and harshly pulls you down. Your face slams into the tire, your hands ripping the tire's rubber. The tire falls flat on the ground and you sit up, rubbing your head.
Above you was the one and only, Damian Wayne. He was in his school uniform and he was looking down at you annoyed. In his hand was a grappling hook, which you assume he used to save you.
You quickly stand up, brushing off your clothes, "Uh, thanks."
Before Damian can respond, like he would, you hear Jon calling out to you.
"Y/n! Oh my god, Y/n! Are you okay?" He's nearly out of breath as he runs up to you before he stops. "Oh. Uh, hi Damian."
There's a moment of awkward silence, before Jon goes back to his normal self.
"What are you doing, Damian?"
"Nothing." Damian is quick, calculated even.
You had only known the two boys for a few months, but it felt like you had known Jon your whole life and this moment felt like the first time meeting Damian. Though, Damian was busy, so you couldn't really blame him. He was the son of a man with an empire and an assassination group. He was bound to be tied up from time to time.
"Uh, do you want to hang out, Damian?"
Damian is taken by surprise. You wanted to hang out? With him? Why?
Jon went to speak for Damian, but Damian interrupts him, "Sure."
"Really?" Both you and Jon speak at the same time, before you both blush out of embarrassment.
"I mean, great. Wow, okay. Yeah, let's hang out."
---
Damian groaned, before laying down on the roof. He could hear Jon and Y/n snickering to themselves, probably over something stupid. He closes his eye, their voices slowly fading from his mind. He didn't know how you had convinced him to hang out with you on a roof in the middle night.
He didn't like you, so he didn't know why he listened to you. He had no reason to care about what you said or thought, but yet here he was.
You had some kind of pull over him and he didn't know why. There was nothing about you that was different from the other superheroes. Sure, you were pretty, but so was Starfire, Raven, Super-woman, etc.
He looks over at you as you lean on Jon's shoulder, whispering some secret into his ear. He wondered what secrets you two were sharing. Maybe if he asked you'd let him in? He didn't know.
He takes his eyes off of you and looks back at the sky. It was a dark and cloudy night, like most nights in Gotham. Though, unlike most nights, it was quiet; Almost peaceful.
It bothered Damian. More than he'd like to admit. He felt an ich in his skin, like he was supposed to be doing something, but there was nothing to do. There was no fight to fight or crime to solve. It was peaceful for the first time in a long time.
---
Jon liked you, a lot. Like more than he's ever liked someone in his life. He feels immense emotions when he's around you, even if your mother doesn't like him. Though, your mother didn't like men period.
He was thankfully you didn't receive that quality from your mother. You were much nicer and happier than your mother. But that could be because you weren't tortured in the same way your mother was by the women of Themyscira.
In fact, they adored you. They treated you like some kind of goddess and cherished you. Jon understood though. You were perfect- At least to him you were. He thought everyone should treat you like the perfect person you are because you deserve nothing less.
---
You were alone with Damian for the first time in all the years you've known each other. You sighed, squeezing your eyes shut. You didn't know how you were going to tell them you were going to be leaving for Themyscira.
Your mother wanted you to be trained by the Amazons to be able to control your powers and abilities. While she herself was banished, she knew they would welcome you with welcome arms.
You knew Jon would take it hard, but it was only going to be for a year. Just a year. A year you'd be away from your best friends. So, there was a part of you that hoped if you told Damian first, it'd be easier to break it to Jon.
"So, when do you leave?"
You looked over at Damian, confused, "Leave?"
"I heard your mother talking to my father. She said she was sending you to Themyscira to train. So," He sits up on his bed, making direct eye contact with you, "when do you leave?"
"Next month. I'll be gone for a year."
"A year?"
"Yeah. My mom wanted me to stay for 3, but I was able to talk her down from it."
"Have you told Jon?"
"No..."
"Well, you know he's not going to react well."
"Yeah. That's why I've been procrastinating it."
"Can I write you?"
You frown, "No. The island is cut off from the world. So, no contact at all. Not even with my mom."
He now frowns, but says nothing more.
---
You sigh, leaning on your hand, your sword tossed on the ground. Before you stood Philippus, your mentor.
"Princess Y/n, what is bothering you so?"
You couldn't tell her you missed your friends. If she knew they were boys you knew you would get scolded. The Amazons didn't like men, because they were chaos and destruction and they were peaceful. A part of you understood, because you've seen the terrible things men can do, but your friends- they weren't like those men.
"Nothing... Just tired."
She takes your answer, even though she knows you're lying. You were frustrated and annoyed. You had been here for a month and found yourself making no progress. This was pointless.
You could have been with your friends, but here you were on some stupid island. You wanted to your friends.
"You know, if you don't get these down in the upcoming year, you'll have to stay."
You straighten up and glare at the woman. "No, I won't-"
Philippus quickly turns around, looking at you offended, "Excuse me?"
"Nothing." You quickly respond not wanting to repeat yourself.
She huffs, rolling her eyes, but decides to leave the conversation.
---
It had been a year since you were forced, by your mother, to train on the Themyscira Island. They wanted you to know how to use your powers to the fullest potential. It was fine... But you missed your friends. You wondered what they were doing. You wondered if they missed you too.
---
Jon was estatic. You were finally going to return from the island. Though, there was a part of him that was worried that you wouldn't remember them or even worse, you would hate them.
"You worry too much," Damian told him.
Jon sighs, trying to collect himself, "I'm just worried." Jon fiddles on his toes, as he repeated looks out of the window, hoping to see you pull up. Though, you were no where to be found. He walks away from the window, his shoulders dropping. "How far is that place?"
"Themyscira? It's a few weeks by boat, but she'll be here soon. She's home now."
Jon lightens up, "Home?"
"Yeah, she won't be here for a few more hours."
Jon glares at Damian, "You had me here looking like an idiot!"
Damian chuckles, "Yeah. I did, didn't I?"
---
Damian wasn't surprised by your appearance, unlike Jon. Damian had already seen you, without you knowing of course. You think he'd let you leave without any kind of contact? He knew everything, thanks to his connections. Though, nothing could compare to you really being in front of you.
Jon was the first to hug you. His arms squeezed you tightly, nearly causing you to lose your breath. He didn't want to let you go- Just hold you forever. He didn't want you leaving forever, but he was forced to let you go.
"You look great, Y/n."
You smile, a blush forming, "You too, Jon." You look around Jon to see Damian, who was avoiding eye contact. It almost reminded you of when you had first met the boys. "No hug, Damian?"
Damian finally looks at you, his natural glare on his face. Unlike Jon, who had let his hair grow out, Damian still had shorter hair, but his features were sharp. Though, that didn't surprise you. What did take you by surprise though is how much he looked like his father.
While Jon looked like a mix of Clark and Lois, Damian just looked like his father. Well, minus his golden skin- He got that from his mother.
Speaking of Jon, you felt him squeeze your bi-cep. You looked at him confused and he blushed.
"Uh, what are you doing, Jon?"
"Your biceps. They're like... Huge." He's fascinated by your arms, even comparing it to his own. While he was naturally strong, because of his powers, you had trained relentlessly for a year and it showed when your arms were bigger than his.
You chuckled at his amusement, before his eyes lit up, "Ah, Y/n you've missed out on so much- Come on," He grabs your arm, leading you inside the headquaters of the Justice League. You are stopped though when Damian grabs your arm that Jon didn't have. Jon looks back, wondering why you stopped when realizing Damian had grabbed you.
"Jon, why don't you head up. I just want to talk to Y/n."
Jon seems reluctant, but you turn to him, "I'll catch up. Promise."
He sighs, but ultimately goes up the stairs and inside the building.
"You look nice."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
"That means a lot coming from you, you know?"
Damian avoids eye contact. He's worried that you might see all his emotions, feelings and thoughts. He didn't want you knowing his darkest thoughts. "Yeah.. Uh, Jon missed you a lot... Obviously. Um..." Damian had never been like this- Lost for words. He always knew what to say. He had everything calculated, but now... Well, he felt lost. He felt your stare on him, waiting for him to finish, but he felt his tongue felt twisted. "It's good to have you back."
"Yeah, well, it's good to be back. You know, I've missed you a lot... And Jon. I've missed you both a lot."
Damian finally looks at you. Your eyes bleeding into his own. For a moment it felt like you two were the only ones in the world. Everything else was just dark and all that was left was you. That was until another voice spoke.
"Y/n."
You both looked up to see your mother. She gestured for you to come inside and you looked back at Damian.
"Well, I guess that I have to go."
"Yeah... I'll see yah."
"Yeah... you will."
You rush up the stairs, trying to stop the blush from forming on your face. You were so embarrassed and felt like the conversation was stupid. You wished you could have done it differently, but it was Damian. You were sure he wasn't as pressed about it as you.
If only you knew how much your life was about to change forever- All thanks to teenage boys' puberty.
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soaps-mohawk · 6 months ago
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I'm going to be honest
I'm having a genuinely hard time making this post. I've been fighting with it for a couple weeks now, but I think it's time I finally make it.
I'm not having fun on this blog anymore.
It sounds bad, but honestly, it kind of is.
I think a lot of it started from the very beginning with the precedence and expectations I put on myself. I've always tried to respond to every comment I get. Even from the beginning. It's just a polite thing to do since those who leave comments took the time to write out what they think of my fic, even if it's just a keysmash. I've always felt the need to thank those who leave comments or reblog my writing or (now that tumblr has it) replied to my fics. It worked fine before because none of my fics were particularly popular. Even my most popular fic (at that time) didn't get as much attention as CRCB has. I've never had a "big blog" before, nor a fic as popular as CRCB has gotten.
It was fine at first, responding to everyone, engaging with everyone. I was riding that high of omg so many people are reading and enjoying my fic! I've never had anything quite like this before.
Now...it just feels more like a chore. I set this precedence on this blog that I respond to everyone and I know a lot of people have said that they're surprised I responded to them and to everyone, and now I'm getting why a lot of writers don't. I'm exhausted. I feel like I've just been robotically saying the same thing over and over trying to respond to people now. I used to love seeing asks in my inbox and reblogs and replies but now? All I feel is dread because I have to respond to all of those.
Turning anon off was a big help. It lessened the sheer volume of asks I was getting a day. And while I do feel bad for all of my anons who prefer to stay anons, with everything that happened (the multiple incidents) with anon that kind of started to suck the joy out of everything. That paired with the obsessive need to constantly have my inbox cleared and make sure everyone gets a response...I can understand now too why big blogs will have 200+ asks in their inbox. It's hard and it's exhausting and I'm burning out.
First it was the fic that was burning me out. Things have gone on far longer than I planned and I just wasn't prepared for this fic to go on and for a while there it was dragging. I'll admit that. If I could go back, I'd speed up a few things, but it's done, it's posted there's no going back. I kind of hoped I would have the mental capacity to upload more than once a week too, but I just couldn't. I still can't.
I've come to dread posting chapters because I know I'm going to have to reply and respond to everyone. The only thing keeping me posting is the fact that we're in the part of the story I've been excited about since the beginning and also because I keep leaving everyone on cliffhangers and I love torturing y'all with all of them.
So that being said, this is in no way to shame anyone for interacting with me, anyone leaving comments or replies or sending asks. Don't feel bad about doing it please. I appreciate all of you that have engaged with me and it really means so much to me. Honestly, earlier this year, if I didn't have this fic and everyone on this blog, I might not have made it to now. It's been a really rough year and it's still going to be into next year. It's just getting to the point where I need a break.
I've needed a break for a long time. I thought taking days off the blog would help, and it did for a couple of weeks, but now even on the days I'm supposed to be on the blog and engaging, I just find myself queueing stuff up and just being offline most of the day still.
I'm tired. That's the best reason I can give. I'm tired and burned out on life and I'm tired and burned out on this blog.
So...I think I need a break. I need to not keep responding to every single reply and reblog every chapter. I need to not force myself to answer every ask right away, no matter how much I want to. I feel bad, but I know everyone would rather have me here and enjoying the blog than forcing myself to interact to the point where I'm dreading it and just robotically repeating myself over and over with every reply and answer and comment.
I won't be pausing the fic, I won't be not uploading. I'll still be posting chapters, I just might not be interacting as much as I have been. It's just putting such a mental strain on me still, even with anon off, even with days off. And with things getting busier for me, it's going to be too much to try and deal with irl stuff and write and try to be super active on the blog. There's going to come a point where I have to sacrifice the writing or the blog and I'd rather sacrifice the blog to keep myself sane, and also to keep trying to finally get this fic done. I love this fic, don't get me wrong, but I'm just burning out.
I'm already burned out in a lot of ways.
I was planning kinktober this year but honestly I'm considering not doing it because I know interaction is going to be insane and it's going to be a lot to keep up on. Plus trying to write that many fics is hard and I'm not sure I have the ability to do it. I have a few done but now I'm just like...is that something I want to do on top of irl stuff and CRCB.
There's just no joy in it anymore. It's not anyone's fault but mine. I put the pressure on myself, I held myself to that standard for this long despite the fact I knew it was draining me. I've tried to push through when I should have prioritized myself. I feel so guilty not responding to everyone. I feel so guilty being a day or two late responding to everyone.
I want to be here and interacting and responding to things but I just can't bring myself to anymore. It's no one's fault, and this is not a drag on anyone, or an attempt to make anyone feel bad or guilty for interacting or sending asks or anything. I'm just airing out the truth and saying what I need to say because I feel like I've been so robotic and lifeless with my responses these last couple weeks and I feel like I need to explain why. It's nothing anyone has done. It's my fault. It's 100% my fault.
Things have just gotten to be too much and it's my fault for forcing myself to be so active. The social battery has dropped into the negatives. I'm not a social person. I can only handle so much interaction and I've pushed so far beyond that, that things have gotten to this point. I want to be here and I want to have fun and I want to use this as an escape but I just don't feel that way about it anymore. It's a chore for me, a job, something I feel like I have to do and it's my fault that I feel that way. It's my own standards and expectations I set on myself, and my expectations on what I think my followers want and deserve and now I feel like I've gone on too long like this that I can't change things without hurting anyone's feelings. I don't want people to think I'm ignoring them in favor of others because I know there's writers out there that do that. They only respond to a certain group and ignore others that comment and reblog. I don't want to make anyone feel like I'm doing that to them and that's now led me to here.
I'm forcing it and I'm tired.
It's been hard these last few weeks. The life has just been draining and draining continuously. The joy and the love I have for this blog and my followers and the interactions and the fic. The last anon bullshit that happened was just kind of the last nail in the coffin so to speak. The straw that broke the camel's back. Things stopped being fun. It made me feel bad (and not in the guilty way, though that was a part of it) and I'm honestly just over it. I'm over the blog, I'm over interacting, I'm over life at this point. August is a hard month for me and every year it seems to get worse and worse. A lot of it is unrelated to anything online and I was going to make a post about it but honestly I just don't want to. Those that know, know. Those that don't...it doesn't matter.
I'm getting annoyed by the blog, I'm getting annoyed every time I look in my notifications and see an ask or a reply or a comment. I'm getting annoyed by some of my followers and that's not fair to you. Everyone always talks about how nice and kind and patient I am when I'm really not. I'm not the person I present myself to be on this blog, the way I mask myself so I can present myself as being a normal, kind human being. The mask is coming off because I'm so tired I can't keep it up anymore. It's happening here and it's happening in real life. I'm tired and I'm frustrated and I'm angry at a lot of things and the last thing I want is to start taking it out on my followers. You don't deserve that, especially when it's not your fault, it's nothing any of you have done. It's all me.
It's not you, it's me.
So for the sake of not burning this whole thing to the ground, I'm going to take a break. I'm not replying to everyone, I'm not responding to every reblog, I won't reply to every ask I get right away, if at all because sometimes I just don't have anything to say in response and I need to learn that's okay. It's nothing against you. It's not aimed at anyone specifically, I'm just trying to put myself first and stop things from escalating. I need a break and I'm going to do something selfish and I'm going to take it.
Don't apologize because it's not your fault. Don't apologize because you think you might have contributed to this because you didn't. It is no one's fault but my own.
I'm the one that needs to apologize to all of you because I've just not been myself because I've been forcing myself to be someone I'm not. I've been very unfair to a lot of people over the last seven months that this blog has been active and I've held a precedent that is not sustainable in the long run and made everyone believe that I was capable of maintaining that kind of interaction when I'm not.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry I've been putting everyone through this. I'm sorry I've been so detached and robotic and ingenuine. I'm sorry I led everyone to believe I'm someone I'm not. I'm sorry I've dragged this on this long that it's gotten to the point that I have to make this post.
I considered just disappearing but that wouldn't be fair to you either. I don't want to put you through that, so I'm pouring all of my thoughts out and making you read through this fucking novel of a post. If you've made it this far, then congrats I guess. Gold metals to you who bothered reading this far.
Anyway, all of that aside, I'll still be posting chapters. I'll have them scheduled and I'll probably come on and add links places to keep things current. I'll respond and reply and answer asks when I feel like it. You don't have to stop sending them, but just don't expect them to be responded to right away anymore. I'll probably still be here reblogging things I want and doing things when I feel like it.
I just need a few weeks to myself. Time I don't have to care about the blog at all and keeping up with it. Anon will remain off for the sake of keeping asshole trolls away, and also so I don't open tumblr and have 200 asks in my inbox after a week. Sorry to my anons but it's just the way it needs to be right now. Maybe once this break is over and I've dealt with irl stuff, I'll consider putting it back on. I just can't after everything I dealt with recently on anon.
It'll be the same on Ao3, for those that follow here and read there. Comments will probably sit for a while. They won't be answered right away anymore unless I get the energy to burn through them. Even then I won't try to answer them all at once like I did this last weekend.
I'll try to reblog something every day so y'all know I'm alright. I don't want y'all to panic and it's not fair to put you through that, especially those that might not see this or bother reading it. Those that follow simply for the fic and nothing else. I'm here, I'm just not...here.
This week's chapter is in the queue to be posted tomorrow as usual. Chapters will still come out as planned since I'm not stopping writing, just taking a break from the blog itself.
Thank you those of you who stuck through to the end here. I appreciate all of you so much. You have no idea. I'm sorry I let things get to this point and I'm sorry to anyone that I've gotten rude or snappy with because I couldn't be selfish and put myself first. I'm sorry to anyone that got a robotic, repeated response to something they were probably excited to share. I'm sorry I've been so unfair to everyone and I hope you can forgive me.
Take care and I'll talk to everyone when I have the energy to.
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fraugwinska · 4 months ago
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Week 2 everyone! Following Hazel's amazing Body Worship featuring our beloved king of hell, we'll continue this week in the same sentiment - Can there be really enough Lucifer x Reader stories?
Dont miss out on the wonderful works of our kinky coven: @hazelfoureyes @minkdelovely @sugoi-writes @macabr3-barbi3 @synamartia
Check out our Masterlist for Kinktober (A big thank you to the marvellous Syn - who also made out Banners!)
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Warnings: Summoning Ritual, Manipulation and emotional Blackmail, Blood, Implied pressure for sexual acts. But with a happy end! And as usual: Minors Stay away - 🔞
"Fuck - It worked... It actually worked!"
You heard your boyfriend's voice, filled with heated excitement, but your eyes were glued to the glowing pentagram before you. That shouldn't be happening - this was supposed to be a silly game, a little make-pretend. You had felt bad, after denying him, again, what he had asked you so many times before. "Come on baby," he had begged, and while you liked him well enough, you hadn't been together for long and something in you told you to wait for you two to cross the border of having sex - It would be your first time, and fuck if people would call you prude, but giving it away meant something to you. It had to feel right. Be with the right person. And you and him weren’t there yet. So you had, hesitantly, agreed to his roleplay idea. You thought it was a bit excessive - the props he gathered, the seriousness in which he had chanted some silly things in latin - all while tying your hands and feet together in what you had thought would be just a dumb game of Fake summoning a demon to spice things up.
But this glowing portal was real, as was the euphoria so tangible in his voice. This hadn't been a game - he had planned this.
Through the bright, golden glow stepped a man - at least you thought it was a man. Lean and regal, dressed in a white, luxurious coat that strangely resembeled a circus director he shifted out of the light into your boyfriend's living room. His blonde hair shimmered in the fading glow and for once, you could see his face in full - And it was terrifyingly beautiful. Golden locks framed his burning red irises, two blush circles sat on the edges of his mouth that was pulled into a face of disdain.
Your boyfriend didn't even acknowledge your trembling whimpers, he just stepped forward, dropping the dagger he had used to prick your finger and let your blood drip on a strange book. "Lord Lucifer... It's an honor to..."
"Cut the Lord-crap, mortal. What the hell is this?" the blonde interrupted him, eyes widening at the sight of your bound and shivering body. He glanced from the dagger to the book to the young man before him and folded his arms. Your heart almost jumped out of your chest. That idiot actually summoned the literal devil? The fallen angel, the king of hell? What was he thinking?
"I've summoned you, Lor... Lucifer, to offer you a virgin in exchange for my own immortality!" His words made you whip your head around. Surely, you must've heard wrong. "Wh-what are you doing?" you asked in a rush of bubbling panic, fighting against the rope that held your arms together. Cold eyes met your pleading ones, and the hope that this would all turn out to be a joke faded completely.
"Sorry, Babe, but this is an opportunity I won't miss out on. You wanted to stay a virgin - and this way, I get something out of it."
"Okay, wait - just so that I get this correctly..." Lucifer stepped in, his eyes darting in disbelief between you and the caster of this wretched summoning ritual, his brows deeply furrowed. "You're offering your girlfriend to me? Are you serious?" His question was met with a hesitant nod, the sight making your stomach drop. The way he tricked you, the way he talked about you, the way he was casually offering you to a literal demon, as if he were selling some worthless thing when he was supposed to love and respect you - Everything inside you felt heavy with hurt and regret. Sure, you couldn't have said it was love you had felt for him - but you thought he'd at least care about you the way you had cared about him. Apparently, you were horribly wrong. Tears dripped silently down your cheeks and you wished for someone, anyone to help.
"I swear she is untouched, my lord, and even if she is plain and not quite the looker, she.."
"You humans are..." Lucifer's voice was filled with cold disgust as he searched for words. Finding none that would suffice, he just snapped his fingers, and you felt as if the air was sucked out of the room. Everything stood still, the fire of the candles in the room didn't move, the hands of the clock, even your boyfriend was frozen in place mid-gesture. Only his pupils shifted to the blonde in a panic, meeting the devil's angry stare. Lucifer shook his head, then he tore his eyes away from him and looked at you, instantly softening and with a pinch of pity as he slowly walked over to you. You flinched when he stretched out his hand, but he stopped and gave you a gentle smile.
"It's okay, doll, I'm not gonna do anything. Just getting rid of those ropes, okay?"
You nod, the wet streaks on your face cold and itchy. Small, delicate hands reach around your wrists, and within a blink the ties disappear. You quickly wipe your face and touch the bruised skin, cautiously rubbing the scratches as Lucifer unties your feet. "There, that's better, right?"
"What... what is happening?" you stutter, not daring to look directly at him, still overcome with the bizarreness of the situation. "Why has everything stopped.. moving?"
Lucifer huffs, offering you his hand and, after you hesitantly took it, pulled you up to stand. "I froze time. That asshole who dares to call himself your boyfriend pissed me off and that's one sure way to keep his rotten mouth shut." He cups your cheek, his hand is warm and soft and so gentle you almost lean in, and lets his thumb wipe away the remaining wet trails of salt, but a fresh flow of tears blur your vision. You struggle for words, but nothing but weak sobbing makes it out of your constricted throat. "I... I can't believe he..."
"I know, angel. I wish I could say he's an exception... but as you might suspect, I've known humanity and the endless depth of their deprivation for a while..." He sighs, stepping away from you. "What I can promise you is that I'm not going to hurt you. That dumb motherfucker might've summoned me correctly - but he sure as hell didn't read the fine print too closely." Lucifer grinned, for the first time this night he actually looked like the devil he was - and you were enraptured at the sight. "The one who offers the blood is the one who bargains a deal with me. And since he was too chicken to spill his own, that means it's you, doll." He laughs, crossing his arms, tilting his head to watch your boyfriend's eyes dart frantically through the room.
"So, it's up to you. Is there anything you want?"
You swallow, the heat of Lucifer's palm still lingering on your cheek and the betrayal burning deep in your guts.
"I..." you say, as if in trance, guided by the hurt and anger and that strange pull towards the demon, "I want to humiliate him. I want to make him regret what he wanted to do..." Lucifers gaze turned into something sinister and dangerous, and you quickly added "Without killing him. I don't want to... be like him."
The devil looks surprised, almost impressed, before he steps towards you once more, taking your hand and kissing it, an impish smile on his divine lips that made his features even more beautiful. "Mh, I do have an idea how we can arrange that. Just remember: You hold the reins to stop whenever you want to stop."
Before you could ask what he means, his mouth travels up your arm and to the crook of your neck, leaving kisses along its trail. Your whole skin breaks out in shivers, a gasp escapes you as you feel your cheeks flush and a heat pool in between your legs. His hands find their way onto your hips, resting instead of pulling, a gesture of such thoughtfulness and respect you could’ve wept and you feel yourself lean into him as he licks along your jawline. It feels daring, it feels strange and yet so alluring you can't help but sink deeper into that warm embrace. Whatever had held you back to give yourself to your now ex-boyfriend - it was nonexistent in the arms of this demon, and wasn't that a travesty? But then again... Lucifer was the personification of temptation afterall.
When he finally kisses you, it's like fireworks exploding in your head. The way his lips gently close around yours, the warmth and sweetness of his mouth, his skillful tongue parting them so effortlessly to slither around your own in playful circles, letting you taste him as he tasted you - there was nothing you could have imagined that would've compared to the intensity that a simple kiss from him conveyed. It wasn’t forced, like it always felt with your boyfriend, but an invitation, with no reproach if you’d decline it. 
"Lucifer.. please..." you breathe as you reluctantly break the kiss, overheated and desperate for air. Your hands act on their own, with a feverish urgency, down to the buckle of his pants. But Lucifer, his smile wide and sultry, caught them, pulling them up and around his shoulders with an almost scolding shake of his head.
"Oh no, angel, the only one that's gonna be worshiped tonight is you." He lifts you up with ease, drawing a little yelp out of you, and moves swiftly as he clears the living room table to spread you out on it, kneeling in between your legs. You're quivering with a hot, bubbling anticipation and even through your lust-dazed mind you still catch Lucifer's wicked glance and the mocking smirk in the direction of your ex-boyfriend.
Slowly, he pushed your white dress up exposing pale, supple skin. The devil's hands explored your thighs, every brush and caress making you writhe as the ache to be touched becomes stronger with every uncovered inch of flesh, and by the time he starts to slowly, achingly work his fingers around your hips, you're already squirming for him, begging him for any kind of friction.
"I'm gonna carve prayers onto your body, my angel," he breathes against the sensitive inside of your thigh, littering it with tiny pecks before he bites down, sharply enough to leave a red mark - it pulls a moan out of you, then an aroused sigh as Lucifer soothingly licks over the reddened skin and slowly kisses his way towards your center. The devil delights at your little noises of want, how you whimper as he pushes your underwear aside instead of tearing it off to the side - though it wouldn't hold for long anyway. "Your body is my temple and your moans the hymns I sing to."
His words send a new kind of electric buzz straight to your cunt, you wanted to say something in return - heaven or hell knows what - but it was a useless endeavor anyway. The words were already forgotten when his tongue dipped into your waiting heat - you buck into him and it earns you a muffled hum of appreciation. Lucifer's movements were slow, languid and at the same time utterly determined. A steady rhythm as his hands found their way back to your hips, pinning you down so that all you could do was take the sweet torture and drown in the pleasure he delivered to you on a golden plate. And so you did. Every swirl of that wicked, sinful tongue drew louder noises from you, every press of his lips to your soaked pussy had your head spinning into overwhelmed euphoria.
Through the haze of your foggy eyes you catch a glimpse of the frozen man you had called 'baby' once. Shocked, unbelieving eyes fixated on you writhing under Lucifer's incomparable ministrations, being expertly eaten out by temptation itself in the form of the most beautiful being imaginable - and a moan that almost sounded like a laugh tore itself from your throat. The sudden wave of pride and morbid joy, combined with a flick of the damned forked tongue over your clit and his name spilling from your lips along with your drool has you cumming in what you could only describe as ethereal bliss - your hand finds Lucifer's hair, digging your fingers into the golden locks and holding him tightly pressed to your seeping core as the waves of your orgasm rock your hips like a boat lost on the ocean - and Lucifer, your lighthouse illuminating your way home, laps up every drop of your essence your body offers him.
By the time you were done riding out your orgasm, Lucifer's skilled tongue had cleaned every bit of the mess you had made. He pressed a soft kiss on your puffed lips, before slowly pulling away onto his knees to look at you, wiping his mouth and watching you with hooded, smoldering eyes.
"Look at you, angel. Only a mortal fool would call something so ethereal as you 'plain'."
Lucifer stands up and leans over to brush the back of his hand softly over your cheek until his fingers rest under your chin, lifting your head ever so slightly to kiss you once more before he turns to your ex. His posture changes, his shoulders straighten and his features become sharp and almost threatening. You try to sit up, body still weak post-orgasm, as you watch him sprout two twisted, fiery horns from his head and three sets of blinding white and red wings from his back. The room is slowly filled with a light like the inside of a fire - you faintly hear a muffled, horrified scream from the immobilized figure behind you, but you couldn't care less. Your sole focus is him - the fallen angel and ruler of hell.
"Remember that you deserve nothing less than what you received tonight, doll."
"Lucifer..." is all you get to say before he spreads his wings and the world turns white.
You shot up, the blanket over your legs falling from the sofa you push yourself up on. The room was quiet and dim, only the light from a few candles making rough shadows dance on the walls. You panted, as if waking up from an intense dream, strands of your hair glued to your neck and cheeks from the sweat. Your head whipped around calling his name, but your boyfriend is nowhere to be found. For a moment, you questioned your sanity when you felt something tickling your thigh. You shifted and reached under you, and your mouth pulled into a wistful smile as you brought the soft, white feather you found to your lips for a longing, bittersweet kiss.
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qwertyprophecy · 2 months ago
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Mortholme Post-Mortem
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The Dark Queen of Mortholme has been out for two weeks, and I've just been given an excellent excuse to write some more about its creation by a lenghty anonymous ask.
Under the cut, hindsight on the year spent making Mortholme and answers to questions about game dev, grouped under the following topics:
Time spent on development Programming Obstacles Godot Animation Pixel art Environment assets Writing Completion Release
Regarding time spent on development
Nope, I’ve got no idea anymore how long I spent on Mortholme. It took a year but during that time I worked on like two other games and whatever else. And although I started with the art, I worked on all parts simultaneously to avoid getting bored. This is what I can say:
Art took a ridiculous amount of time, but that was by choice (or compulsion, one might say). I get very excitable and particular about it. At most I was making about one or two Hero animations in a day (for a total of 8 + upgraded versions), but anything involving the Queen took multiple times longer. When I made the excecutive decision that her final form was going to have a bazillion tentacles I gave up on scheduling altogether.
Coding went quickly at the start when I was knocking out a feature after another, until it became the ultimate slow-burn hurdle at the end. Testing, bugfixing, and playing Jenga with increasingly unwieldy code kept oozing from one week to the next. For months, probably? My memory’s shot but I have a mark on my calendar on the 18th of August that says “Mortholme done”. Must’ve been some optimistic deadline before the ooze.
Writing happened in extremely productive week-long bursts followed by nothing but nitpicky editing while I focused on other stuff. Winner in the “changed most often” category, for sure.
Sound was straightforward, after finishing a new set of animations I spent a day or two to record and edit SFX for them. Music I originally scheduled two weeks for, but hubris and desire for more variants bumped it to like a month.
Regarding programming
The Hero AI is certainly the part that I spent most of my coding time on. The basic way the guaranteed dodging works is that all the Queen’s attacks send a signal to the Hero, who calculates a “danger zone” based on the type of attack and the Queen’s location. Then, if the Hero is able to dodge that particular attack (a probability based on how much it's been used & story progression), they run a function to dodge it.
Each attack has its own algorithm that produces the best safe target position to go to based on the Hero’s current position (and other necessary actions like jumping). Those algorithms needed a whole lot of testing to code counters for all the scenarios that might trip the Hero up.
The easiest or at least most fun parts for me to code are the extra bells and whistles that aren’t critical but add flair. Like in the Hero’s case, the little touches that make them seem more human: a reaction speed delay that increases over time, random motions and overcompensation that decrease as they gain focus, late-game Hero taking prioritising aggressive positiniong, a “wait for last second” function that lets the Hero calculate how long it’ll take them to move to safety and use the information to squeeze an extra attack in…
The hardest attack was the magic circle, as it introduced a problem in my code so far. The second flare can overlap with other attacks, meaning the Hero had to keep track of two danger zones at once. For a brief time I wanted to create a whole new system that would constantly update a map of all current danger zones—that would allow for any number of overlapping attacks, which would be really cool! Unfortunately it didn’t gel with my existing code, and I couldn’t figure out its multitudes of problems since, well…
Regarding obstacles
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Thing is, I’m hot garbage as a programmer. My game dev’s all self-taught nonsense. So after a week of failing to get this cool system to work, I scrapped it and instead made a spaghetti code monstrosity that made magic circle run on a separate danger zone, and decided I’d make no more overlapping attacks. That’s easy; I just had to buffer the timing of the animation locks so that the Hero would always have time to move away. (I still wanted to keep the magic circle, since it’s fun for the player to try and trick the Hero with it.)
There’s my least pretty yet practical solo dev advice: if you get stuck because you can’t do something, you can certainly try to learn how to do it, but occasionally the only way to finish a project within a decade to work around those parts and let them be a bit crap.
I’m happy to use design trickery, writing and art to cover for my coding skills. Like, despite the anonymous asker’s description, the Hero’s dodging is actually far from perfect. I knew there was no way it was ever going to be, which is why I wrote special dialogue to account for a player finding an exploit that breaks the intended gameplay. (And indeed, when the game was launched, someone immediately found it!)
Regarding Godot
It’s lovely! I switched from Unity years ago and it’s so much simpler and more considerate of 2D games. The way its node system emphasises modularity has improved my coding a lot.
New users should be aware that a lot of tutorials and advice you find online may be for Godot 3. If something doesn’t work, search for what the Godot 4 equivalent is.
Regarding animation
I’m a professional animator, so my list of tips and techniques is a tad long… I’ll just give a few resource recommendations: read up on the classic 12 principles of animation (or the The Illusion of Life, if you’d like the whole book) and test each out for yourself. Not every animation needs all of these principles, but basically every time you’ll be looking at an animation and wondering how to make it better, the answer will be in paying attention to one or more of them.
Game animation is its own beast, and different genres have their own needs. I’d recommend studying animations that do what you’d like to do, frame by frame. If you’re unsure of how exactly to analyse animation for its techniques, youtube channel New Frame Plus shows an excellent example.
Oh, and film yourself some references! The Queen demanded so much pretend mace swinging that it broke my hoover.
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Regarding pixel art
The pixel art style was picked for two reasons: 1. to evoke a retro game feel to emphasise the meta nature of the narrative, and 2. because it’s faster and more forgiving to animate in than any of my other options.
At the very start I was into the idea of doing a painterly style—Hollow Knight was my first soulslike—but quickly realised that I’d either have to spend hundreds of hours animating the characters, or design them in a simplistic way that I deemed too cutesy for this particular game. (Hollow Knight style, one day I’d love to emulate you…)
I don’t use a dedicated program, just Photoshop for everything like a chump. Pixel art doesn’t need anything fancy, although I’m sure specialist programs will keep it nice and simple.
Pixel art’s funny; its limitations make it dependent on symbolism, shortcuts and viewer interpretation. You could search for some tutorials on basic principles (like avoiding “jaggies” or the importance of contrast), but ultimately you’ll simply want to get a start in it to find your own confidence in it. I began dabbling years ago by asking for character requests on Tumblr and doodling them in pixels in whatever way I could think of.
Regarding environment assets
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The Queen’s throne room consists of two main sprites—one background and one separate bit of the door for the Hero disappear behind—and then about fifty more for the lighting setup. There’s six different candle animations, there’s lines on the floor that need to go on top of character reflections, all the candle circles and lit objects are separated so that the candles can be extinguished asynchronously; and then there’s purple phase 2 versions of all of the above.
This is all rather dumb. There’s simpler ways in Godot to do 2D lighting with shaders and a built-in system (I use those too), but I wanted control over the exact colours so I just drew everything in Photoshop the way I wanted it. Still, it highlights how mostly you only need a single background asset and separated foreground objects; except if you need animated objects or stuff that needs to change while the game’s running, you’ll get a whole bunch more.
I wholeheartedly applaud having a go at making your own game art, even if you don’t have any art background! The potential for cohesion in all aspects of design—art, game, narrative, sound—is at the heart of why video games are such an exciting medium!
Regarding writing
Finding the voices of the Queen and the Hero was the quick part of the process. They figured that out they are almost as soon as writing started. I’d been mulling this game over in my mind for so long, I had already a specific idea in mind of what the two of them stood for, conceptually and thematically. When they started bantering, I felt like all I really had to do was to guide it along the storyline, and then polish.
What ended up taking so long was that there was too much for them to say for how short the game needed to be to not feel overstretched. Since I’d decided to go with two dialogue options on my linear story, it at least gave me twice the amount of dialogue that I got to write, but it wasn’t enough!
The first large-scale rewrite was me going over the first draft and squeezing in more interesting things for the Queen and the Hero to discuss, more branching paths and booleans. There was this whole thing where the player’s their dialogue choices over multiple conversations would lead them to about four alternate interpretations of why the Queen is the way she is. This was around the time I happened to finally play Disco Elysium, so of course I also decided to also add a ton of microreactivity (ie. small changes in dialogue that acknowledge earlier player choices) to cram in even more alternate dialogue. I spent ages tinkering with the exact nuances till I was real proud of it.
Right until the playtesters of this convoluted contraption found the story to be unclear and confusing. For some reason. So for my final rewrite, I picked out my favourite bits and cut everything else. With the extra branching gone, there was more room to improve the pacing so the core of the story could breathe. The microreactivity got to stay, at least!
A sample of old dialogue from the overcomplicated version:
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Regarding completion
The question was “what kept me going to actually finish the game, since that is a point many games never even get to meet?” and it’s a great one because I forgot that’s a thing. Difficulties finishing projects, that is—I used to think it was hard, but not for many years. Maybe I’ve completed so many small-scale games already that it hardly seems that unreasonable of an expectation? (Game jams. You should do game jams.)
I honestly never had any doubt I was going to finish Mortholme. When I started in late autumn last year, I was honestly expecting the concept to be too clunky to properly function; but I wished to indulge in silliness and make it exist anyways. That vision would’ve been easy to finish, a month or two of low stakes messing around, no biggie. (Like a game jam!)
Those months ran out quickly as I had too much fun making the art to stop. It must’ve been around the time I made this recording that it occurred to me that even if the game was going to be clunky, it could still genuinely work on the back of good enough storytelling technique—not just writing, but also the animation and the Hero’s evolving behaviour during the gameplay segments which I’d been worried about. The reaction to my early blogging was also heartening. Other people could also imagine how this narrative could be interesting!
A few weeks after that I started planning out the narrative beats I wanted the dialogue to reach, and came to the conclusion that I really, really wanted it to work. Other people had to see this shit, I thought. There’s got to be freaks out there who’d love to experience this tragedy, and I’m eager to deliver.
That’s why I was fine with the project’s timeline stretching out. If attention to detail and artistry was going to make this weird little story actually come to life, then great, because that’s exactly the part of development I love doing most. Projects taking longer than expected can be frustrating, but accepting that as a common part of game dev is what allows confidence in eventual their completion regardless.
Regarding release
Dear anonymous’s questions didn’t involve post-release concerns, but it seems fitting to wrap up the post-mortem by talking about the two things about Mortholme's launch that were firsts for me, and thus I was unprepared for.
1. This was the first action game I've coded. Well, sort of—I consider Mortholme to be a story first and foremost, with gameplay so purposefully obnoxious it benefits from not being thought of as a “normal” game. Still, the action elements are there. For someone who usually sticks to making puzzle games since they’re easier to code, this was my most mechanically fragile game yet. So despite all my attempts at playtesting and failsafes, it had a whole bunch of bugs on release.
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Game-breaking bugs, really obvious bugs, weird and confusing bugs. It took me over a week to fix all that was reported (and I’m only hoping they indeed are fully fixed). That feels slow; I should’ve expected it was going to break so I could’ve been faster to respond. Ah well, next time I know what I’ll be booking my post-release week for.
2. This was my first game that I let players give me money for. Sure, it’s pay-what-you-want, but for someone as allergic to business decisions as I am, it was a big step. I guess I was worried of being shown that nobody would consider my art worth financial compensation. Well, uh, that fear has gone out of the window now. I’m blown away by how kind and generous the players of Mortholme have been with their donations.
I can’t imagine it's likely to earn a living wage from pouring hundreds of hours into pay-what-you-want passion projects, but the support has me heartened to seek out a future where I could make these weird stories and a living both.
Those were the unexpected parts. The part I must admit I was expecting—but still infinitely grateful for—was that Mortholme did in fact reach them freaks who’d find it interesting. The responses, comments, analyses, fan works (there’s fic and art!! the dream!!), inspiration, and questions (like the ones prompting me to write this post-mortem) people have shared with me thanks to Mortholme… They’ve all truly been what I was hoping for back when I first gave myself emotions thinking about a mean megalomaniac and stubborn dipshit.
Thank you for reading, thank you for playing, and thank you for being around.
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grudgecollector · 16 days ago
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Afterglow | Nam-gyu / American!Reader
You're reading part five
Story Summary: Nam-gyu gets a new job and finds himself falling for the girl behind the deli counter.
Words: 2.3k
Tags/Warnings: Nam-gyu and Thanos have PTSD, canon divergence, Thanos lives, Nam-gyu doesn't know how to process negative emotions, angst, self harm, fluff, smut, dry humping, p n v, unprotected, creampie
A/N: Haiii what a whiplash of tags
It's been absolutely forever since I've written smut so I apologize if this isn't good LMAO
I just felt I might as well give you guys a little gift after last chapter
Anyway I'm not sure if this is going to be the last chapter. But I feel like it's a fitting end for these two. I might do some little tid bits in the future, I've got some ideas already, but you'll just have to bare with me.
I'm a little iffy about this chapter. I have no idea if it makes sense or if it's actually good, but I think that's only because I kind of struggled to write it and have been staring at it WAY TOO LONG.
MASTERLIST
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Lightning strikes rippled through the dark rainy skies above Nam-gyu’s apartment. Streaks of yellow light blooming before each thunderous boom echoed above. The awning above shielded Nam-gyu from the downpour that fell in thick drops, smacking against the ground in quick succession. 
Nam-gyu’s chest felt hollow, emotions numb, but his head still had a storm raging inside. He felt terrible. You had been so excited to show him and Su-bong all that Halloween had to offer in America.
He would be lying if he said he didn't share your enthusiasm, but the events of this morning had ruined everything.
A particularly bad nightmare had woken Nam-gyu up. Sweat was covering his chest and the back of his neck. He blinked several times trying to register where he was, your horrified screams still echoing through his head. 
He had wanted to call you, to receive the comfort your voice always brought him, but he didn’t want to worry you so early in the morning.
Throughout the day his thoughts ran wild, the nightmare playing over and over in more and more gruesome scenarios. Nam-gyu felt like he was being sucked back into that nightmarish place with each minute that passed. 
Nam-gyu flicked the flimsy ashes of his cigarette onto the pavement below. He picked at the skin around his fingernails carelessly. His eyelids sagged a little, his lips downturned in a cold expression, irritation jabbing itself into his side. 
He honestly felt embarrassed, a brief insecure thought of “Am I overreacting?” passing through his head. Nam-gyu was used to acting like this around Su-bong, having witnessed each other at their very worst many times. But to have you see this part of him? It made him want to crawl out of his skin.
You shouldn’t have to be with someone so broken. 
Nam-gyu didn’t want to admit it to himself, but his friend was right. 
He couldn’t keep tearing himself apart like this. And he knew once he fell down that slippery slope, he would drag you down right alongside him.
He would become the worst version of himself all over again. The self centered, arrogant, careless asshole he always became when he was high. 
The cherry of his cigarette was so bright against the blackened night sky, the white paper burning back, peeling into a burnt black before turning grey as he took another slow drag. 
Just one more score… One more hit… Just one more bump… One last time…
The cigarette sizzled against Nam-gyu’s wrist, he sucked in a loud hiss through his teeth. The burning pain bloomed through his skin as he let the remains of the orange filter fall to the ground pathetically, an angry red burn staring back at him. 
~~~
The next few days dragged on at an agonizing pace. You hadn’t seen Nam-gyu or Su-bong since that night, and it left a pit of hopelessness in your stomach. You constantly had to remind yourself to put your phone away, rereading the text Su-bong had sent you over and over again. 
“Just give us a few days and I promise you’ll get some answers.”
Each passing second you waited for that chime to come. Glancing back to the black screen of your phone more often than you would like to admit. That nausea stirred by anxiety bit at the back of your throat for hours on end during the second day, tears threatening to fall from your eyes. 
In a way you were terrified that this would somehow result in the end of your relationship, overthinking every possible outcome that could happen once Su-bong finally does text you. 
You knew deep down that you were being ridiculous. But in the past your relationships have ended over much more trivial things. Stupid things that could have been talked about, solved with a simple conversation. 
No, this couldn’t be what ended things with Nam-gyu. You couldn’t let someone like him slip through your fingers like that. No matter how broken or bruised he thought he was. 
But as you sat on his couch listening to Su-bong recount the events they experienced while in South Korea, you finally started to understand. 
The blood and carnage they witnessed, it would have been unbelievable if Su-bong didn’t show you the articles to back up everything he said. 
“BREAKING: Underground deathmatch operation in South Korea finally comes to a halt, forty two people rescued, number of arrests unknown at this time.” 
You looked over at Nam-gyu who was at the other end of the couch, legs tucked into his chest as he smoked a blunt lazily, looking everywhere but at you. He hasn’t said a word since you sat down, his fingers dragging across his bottom lip softly as he listened to his friend talk. 
A tense silence hung in the air after Su-bong finished. His eyes lingered on Nam-gyu before looking at you. 
How does someone even respond to something like this? Where do you even begin? You have never watched someone die, let alone be murdered. In all honesty you thought that Nam-gyu might have just relapsed, and that he was too scared to tell you. 
You could have never guessed it was something as horrifying as this. 
Nam-gyu cleared his throat, “Please don’t feel like you need to pity me. The stuff we went through was… It was bad but-" He was quiet for a second, stuck on his own words, "Fuck I don’t even know how to talk about this shit, nevermind.” He laughed bitterly, going back to smoking. 
Being stuck in an environment like that can fundamentally change a person for life. Preyed upon at their lowest points, broken down into the worst versions of yourself. Hundreds of people ripping each other apart lest they fall first, having to fight your way out with no guarantee that you would live to see the sunlight again.
You couldn’t even begin to imagine what it must have been like for them. 
“All we’re asking is for you to be a little patient with us.” Su-bong said finally, picking awkwardly at the strings on his pants. 
You realize that they both must have felt extremely vulnerable right now. One of their darkest secrets finally out in the open, revealing the throbbing gash that was their minds. 
“Of course.” 
~~~
Nam-gyu’s room was freezing. A fan humming loudly in the corner of his room, the notch turned to the highest setting. The curtain over his window fluttered, the streetlights from outside briefly lighting his sparsely decorated walls, illuminating your soft gaze. Nam-gyu could almost trick himself into thinking stars were in your eyes, sparkling as they stared into his soul. 
Your fingertips kissed the skin of his cheek, your lips a sweet caress against his as you whispered softly to him. Words that soaked into his skin like sunlight on a summer’s day, he could almost hear birds chirp in the back of his mind as his eyes slipped closed.
That storm raging inside of him slowly turned into a soft drizzle, and for a brief moment Nam-gyu almost felt like a rainbow could bloom from behind the grey clouds of his mind. 
You made everything feel right. 
Every thorny fear stabbed into Nam-gyu’s quickly beating heart kissed away by each touch. 
“I love you, Nam-gyu… More than I have ever loved anyone.” You whispered against his cheek. 
His blunt fingernails scratched oh so softly at the skin under your shirt, drawing meaningless patterns as you continued showering him in your adoration.
Nam-gyu swore that his heart was going to beat out of his chest, the only thing that plagued his mind now was you. 
“I’m really sorry…” Nam-gyu finally spoke up, his voice weaker than he had expected it to be. 
You looked at him curiously, fingers combing through his hair gently. Goosebumps rose up on Nam-gyu’s arms as he tried to think about what he wanted to say next. 
“I know that you were really scared a few days ago… And I just feel bad, I should have told you about all of this sooner, but…” He took a deep, shaky breath, “I was terrified that you would see me differently. Like I'm some broken… thing that needed fixing.” 
A kiss was pressed softly to Nam-gyu’s forehead, then to his cheek, there was a long beat of silence. Nam-gyu could tell you were carefully figuring out how to word your response. 
“Don’t apologize for not telling me. I’m just thankful that you felt safe enough to let me in like this.” 
~~~
Over the next month things started to settle back down. Nam-gyu still struggled, as any normal person would in his circumstance. But eventually your usual routines were slowly restored, and things felt like they were back to normal again.
Nam-gyu was smiling a lot more, his usual playful attitude finally shining back through. It seemed as though a weight was finally being lifted from his tense shoulders, allowing him to relax back into his life. 
And as a way to provide a helpful distraction from their troubles, you got them into one of your favorite shows that you watched as a teenager. 
It was an American show that neither man had heard of before, they were interested enough to start watching it, and now they were hooked. You wished so desperately you could watch for the first time all over again. Wishing you could share their shocked reactions when their wide eyes would meet yours. 
“Oh my god- get this bitch out of my face.” Nam-gyu groaned, a particularly annoying character walking on screen. 
“He’s really not that bad.” Su-bong commented, crunching loudly on a piece of popcorn, “At least he killed that one guy.” 
Nam-gyu glances up at you from where his head was laying on your thigh, as if to say “Can you believe this guy?” before rolling his eyes and saying,
“Yeah that was the most useful thing he’s done this entire season.”
A small laugh leaves you, your fingers softly playing with his hair. Your fingertips softly brushed against the shell of his ear, making him shiver a little. There was a certain heat to your touch, grabbing his attention as you trailed closer to the base of his neck and around to trace the side of his adams apple. 
You watched him carefully. Watched as his hand slowly came up to your thigh, gripping just above your knee, his body was more tense than before. But his eyes didn’t leave the screen for a second, not even as your fingertips dipped below the collar of his shirt and your fingernails scratched against the skin just below his collarbone. 
~~~
His lips whispered across your skin, fingers gripping harshly on your hips as he brought you closer. You could feel how hard he was against your clothed center. You could feel the heat of his cock pressing into you as you grind down against him, small moans slipping from his mouth between breathless kisses. 
Your neck was wet with his spit, bite marks already blooming into delicious bruises. One of your hands weaved through his hair, deepening your desperation as his tongue made its way past your parted lips. 
He guides your hips with precision, the press of him making your desire heighten with each salacious movement. You felt like a woman starved, every fibre of your being craving him. With every sound that left his lips, every time your name dripped from his tongue. 
“Fuck, honey.” He whispered against your lips, he braced a hand on your back as he flipped the both of you over, his hips working against yours harder than before, “Fuck…”
Nam-gyu separated himself from you for just a second, pushing his boxers down just enough. You were quick to remove your own underwear, throwing it to the floor. Your legs quickly found their way back to his waist, your hands pulling him back down for another kiss. 
You couldn’t keep your hands off of him. Your lips pressed soft kisses to his jaw when he leaned his forehead against your shoulder, pushing himself inside of you so slowly. The stretch of his cock made your lips part with a gasp, your nails bit into his shoulder as he started grinding into you, the tip kissing your cervix. 
“Shit, baby, always so fucking tight.” His words sent jolts through your whole body, “So good...” He whispered into your ear. 
His first thrust almost pushed the air from your lungs, a steady pace being set as his hands explored your chest. He squeezed your breast before he brought his hand to brush his thumb against your throat. 
Sweet moans poured from his mouth as he pressed messy kisses to the side of your throat. His hips slapped yours loudly, his cock ramming so deep inside you that it leaves you breathless. You felt like you were vibrating with pleasure. 
“‘S fucking good- shit.” His hand trailed down between your sweaty bodies, his middle finger finding your clit. Sparks traveled through your body to the tips of your toes, his fingers massaged against your bundle of nerves softly.
“Please…” You whine out pathetically. 
“You gonna cum baby?” You could see the smirk playing at the corner of his lips. 
His hips were slamming into you harder now, fucking into you like it would be the last time. He was savoring every single drag of his cock inside your velvet walls, squeezing against him so tightly, pulling him back in. 
“Nam-gyu, oh fuck!” Your thighs shook against him as your orgasm crashed into you, your fingers clawing against his shoulders. 
“Shit.” He gasped, his hips grinding into yours and you could feel him twitch as he finally came, hot spurts coating your insides. 
Nam-gyu’s eyes met yours. They were soft, swimming with unspoken emotions, a small smile tugged at his lips. His fingers brushed away the sweaty strands of hair from your cheek, fingertips grazing your jaw as he brought you into a crushing kiss. A kiss that said, 
I love you… I love you… I love you…
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madhatterbri · 27 days ago
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Always | D.P.
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Summary: can you please write an Damian Priest X Fem Reader Story where Reader and him are best friends, (Reader is around Rhea's Age) and reader is also an Wrestler on the RAW Brand. Damian got tickets to see reader favorite band in town (something metal of course) and asks her to join him for the concert, which she accepts, when Damian wanna pick reader up that evening Damian is too stunned by the way she got dressed (all sexy and seductive). At the concert while jamming to the songs he lays his hands on her hips and she pulls him towards her lips and kiss him.
Requested by: Anonymous
Happy Monday Night RAW, babes. ❤️
Damian Priest Masterlist
WWE Masterlist
Taglist: @theworldofotps @smallestsnarkestgirl @mrsarcherofinfamy @terrortwinunicorn @brideofinfamy @miss-kuki-nz @hotwheels1108 @new-zealand-chic @magicalbuttertarts @eringobragh420 @missbmc94 @surdelcielo @hodgepodge-musings
"Killswitch Engage?" She asked with a huge grin on her face. Her eyes could see the tickets in Damian's phone, but she couldn't believe he had spent all that money on her. "You want me to go with you to see Killswitch Engage?"
Damian smiled at her reaction. The younger woman was over the moon about this. He had it all planned out. They would go to the concert and board the plane for their next RAW show. No one would miss work. She couldn't afford to miss work now that she had the women's championship belt.
"Think of it as a gift for your accomplishment this year," he smiled.
She returned his phone to him. The two wrestlers embraced. "You are the best, D."
"I've been told that a couple of times. I'll pick you up around 7, alright?"
"It's a date," she answered. Her cheeks burned as she walked away. It wasn't a date. She told herself so many times that nothing would ever happen between them.
He laughed yet stared as she walked away. "Yeah, it's a date."
With any luck, it would certainly turn into one.
The night of the concert, Damian drove to her house at the agreed upon time. He wore a Killswitch Engage shirt and black pants. The archer of infamy leaned against the car as he waited. He texted her that he was waiting outside. Nothing could have prepared him for when he saw her.
She wore a black choker with metal studs. Matching bracelets clung to her wrists. A Killswitch Engage shirt that was torn on the sides gripped her curves just right. A belt that matched her choker and bracelet held her pants to her. Her entire outfit was complemented by black boots.
"Is it bad?" She asked sheepishly. "I can change if you think so."
Damian shook his head. He never even realized that she was walking to him. It was like she stopped time. "Don't think for a second that you look awful. You look.... amazing."
Her cheeks burned again as she whispered a thank you.
The car ride to the stadium was filled with excitement. The car's speakers played Killswitch Engage songs that they hoped the band would play live before them. She thanked him again for getting the tickets and driving them there.
"Of course, it's a date, remember?" He winked at her. She smiled at him and looked out the window.
They walked inside the busy stadium. He splurged and bought them floor passes. Ever the protective one, he stood behind her to make sure no idiots would hurt her. The audience nearly blew the roof down when the band walked on stage.
Killswitch Engage played a couple of songs before playing her all-time favorite. The song was called Always. It was a simple song that always had such a hold on her. She didn't dare play the song in the car. There was no way that Damian could hear this song.
Despite the noise of the crowd, she heard him singing the song. This wasn't unusual, except for the fact that he seemed to be singing it to her. His lips close to her ears. For the first time that night, his hands were on her hips.
"I am with you always, from the darkness of night until the morning,"
He had always been there for her. The veteran took her under his wing and was there for her darkest times. When all hope felt lost that she would never get a title reign, he was there. Even while she is championship, he always stepped up.
Feeling brave, she turned around to look at him. Their eyes locked together. He stopped singing. The world around them melted away into a blur of colors. They were no longer in a concert full of Killswitch Engage fans. They were alone.
She ran her hand up his chest and behind his back.
"Damian," she breathed. Her eyes lowered to his lips. She stood on her toes as she guided him towards her face. Their lips locked in a kiss. She wrapped her other hand around the back of his neck. This is how she wanted their newfound relationship to be.
Always.
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halucynator · 1 year ago
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Hi! Could I please request a FIC abt Mattheo or Theodore (I’m in love with them both) and the reader always picks her hangnails (to fidget bc she is on the spectrum and has adhd) and they get her to stop by alway holding her hands and she goes to his quidditch game? (I love your fics sm)
Good luck charm
Pairing: Mattheo Riddle x fem!reader
Warnings: like none? do tell if I missed any xx
Summary: (just like read the request I cba)
A/n: thanks for the request and thank you SO much for the compliment💞! Sorry for the wait xx I wrote it about mattheo because I'm in my mattheo era (plus I feel like theo wouldn't be the sporty type) but I will write a Theodore version as well if you're okay with waiting xx I also happen to have ADHD lol so I just related the story to myself. English isn't my first language so there might be mistakes xx not proof read. I don't love it but I don't hate it either xx hope you like it x
reblogs are appreciated xx
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You sat down in Snape's potion class after you got scolded for being 5 minutes late. His classes were SO boring. Your ADHD didn't help either. You grabbed your quill and started to doodle but were shortly stopped by Snape shouting at you for the second time in a 15 minute span.
You rolled your eyes and looked for something to fiddle with. I mean, how could it be your fault that you had ADHD? Was it really that wrong that you needed to fiddle with something to concentrate? Snape definitely made it seem like a sin.
You noticed a hangnail on your finger and started to pick on that. Snape could take that away from you. I mean, was he going to cut off your fingers? As you pulled on the hangnail, you felt a little sting and you knew if your bare flesh made contact with even a drop of water, it would burn. This wasn't avoidable either especially since you were in potions. But you could worry about that later. As long as you could concentrate.
"You need to stop doing that. It looks painful. Plus it isn't healthy." Mattheo comments as be places his hand on yours. It's a comforting feeling but you feel uneasy, looking for something else to fiddle with.
"but I can't! I have ADHD."
"There's got to be better ways to cope."
"there's nothing else to fiddle with"
"Here." He slips one of his rings off his fingers and hands it to you.
"are you sure" you ask.
"yes love." He replies.
And so you fiddle with his silver ring the rest of the lesson but find it hard to with him holding one of your hand captive. You wanted to ask to move it, but you didn't want him to feel upset plus you kinda liked the feeling of his warm hand on your freezing cold one.
**✿❀ ❀✿****✿❀ ❀✿****✿❀ ❀✿**
You were excited for the quidditch match, Slytherin against Gryffindor. You walked up to Pansy, Theodore and Blaise, your group of friends, as you spotted then among the crowd which was dripping with anticipation.
As the game started, you found yourself searching for a particular brown, curly haired boy.
As you spotted him, aiming to score, you felt yourself blushing. As he scored half of the crowd cheered in excitement, and the other half groaned in frustration. As you locked eyes with the brunette boy, you caught hun winning at you which made you turn even more red than you already were if that was possible.
The game ended with Slytherin being victorious (which was a first).
After the game you walked up to Mattheo to congratulate him.
"I've never been to a quidditch match before but I heard this was Slytherin's first victory against Gryffindor."
"Guess you are a good luck charm." He smiled at you.
You blushed. Something about that comment felt genuine, like it was more than just a joke.
"Ah, is that so? You were amazing out there by the way."
"Only for you princess." He winked at you. "I assumed you were awestruck by me. I caught you staring." he grinned.
You blushed as you started to fiddle with your hangnail again. You felt a comforting hand on yours. Mattheo's hand.
"Now now love. We talked about this. Use my rings instead."
You felt nice that Mattheo cared about you. You smiled at him, trying to keep your composure. You felt like kissing him right there and then but you didn't.
Your friends walked up to Mattheo and congratulated him for the win, snapping you out of your daydream about the brunette boy who, at this very moment, was holding your hand.
"You could say we had a good luck charm." He winked at you.
You chuckled at the statement. Girlfriend had a better ring to it, but for now you settled for 'A good luck charm.'
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1d1195 · 1 year ago
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Sun-Kissed I
Here is a fluffy/smutty little piece of love on the beach. It’s ~9k words. It’s a love at first sight kind of thing I know it’s kind of ridiculous for them to be falling in love so fast but it’s my story and I’m sticking with it. Also, sorry that I’m really into sunflowers right now. Sunflower Vol. 6 has been on my mind lately so that’s gonna make an appearance for the third time as of late. I don’t know if anyone else cares about all my little easter eggs regarding real life Harry in my writing but I’m really pretty proud of the news one I put in here. I'm sorry they're both teachers again I needed them to have summer's off to make this work. Their careers are not a major part of the story.
Warnings: There’s some pretty 18+ things happening here. Masturbating, public sex (kinda), thigh riding, etc. If you’re not into this, I wouldn’t read it. It's all fluff otherwise. There won't be a bit of angst.
I've been trying to write this for over a year and finally came pouring out. Unfortunately, there will be a second part next Thursday only because I thought it was getting too long. So it does end a little abruptly. Hope you enjoy anyway :)
Harry was fascinated by her, simply put. He wanted to spend forever at dinner with her. Chatting with her. Looking at her beautiful face. Envying how the sun got to kiss her, and he didn’t.
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Harry didn’t grow up near a beach so he thought this would be great way to cash in on his vacation time over the summer. Sitting at the beach, reading a book, and dipping his toes in the water when it got too hot. His mum knew someone who knew someone who gave him a great deal on the summer rental, and he was beyond excited to sit and relax for the first time in years.
Being an earlier riser had its advantages. For one, he got the pick of where to set up his summer getaway on the beach. He brought a cooler, a chair, and a few towels along with a book or two to spend the day. Through his sunglasses, he faced the direction of the sunshine. He hadn’t had a proper summer holiday since he was young and now that he was busy teaching and had summer’s off, he was elated to have some time to himself.
Once he settled his belongings, he turned on a summer playlist he’d been working on for a while. He didn’t turn it up loud—he would never want to bother anyone that may join him on the beach—but it was loud enough to hear and not interrupt his imagination while reading.
It was utterly peaceful.
Apparently, Harry was unaware of just how truly peaceful the beach could be.
“Hey,” a voice said softly, it was sweet. A gentle shake on the arm, her skin was cool to the touch. His eyes blinked open unsurely. He realized he fell asleep and didn’t even get through the first page of his book. “Hi,” she whispered with a gentle smile. “You’re going to start burning,” she explained handing over a bottle of sunscreen to his hands while Harry tried to wake himself up. “And your book is in the sand,” she said grabbing it before the spine broke from all the grains of the beach ruining the binding.
“Oh,” he shook his head desperate for his brain to catch up to his surroundings. “Thanks,” he said gratefully.
“No problem!” She chirped heading back to the chair that was a few meters in front of him. “I already burned once this summer and it was miserable. Just don’t want you to suffer the same fate.”
He pushed open the bottle and started rubbing on the sunscreen. It felt like he was going to have a slight burn already. The relief of the lotion on his skin made him wary. “Ah, guess...I should probably leave,” he chuckled. “Try again tomorrow.”
“Oh...if you want to stay, I have an umbrella,” she said cheerfully. “S’a nice day, just give me a minute to set up,” she smiled and gave her name to Harry.
Harry had hardly gotten a good look at her with a sleepy set of eyes a bit wiped by the sun. His brain was foggy with the impromptu nap. This small little town he was staying in had the vibe that someone like her would help a stranger. Everyone had been so nice in the grocery store and when Harry went for his run yesterday, people said hello and commented on how nice the evening was. It was an adorable little town and Harry was already dreading having to leave in two weeks’ time.
“Well, thank you. M’Harry,” he said quietly while he finished rubbing the lotion over his body. He watched her work, his mind less foggy. Glancing at his watch, he noted it was a little over two hours since he arrived. It wasn’t too hot outside still, so his burn would be minor if he got one at all. With the addition of a blanket and the umbrella, it was almost a mirror image of Harry’s little set up. A chair, a cooler, and a couple towels.
She had a ponytail pulled through a baseball cap and she wore a button down, rolled to the elbows. The top few buttons were open revealing a deep blue bathing suit top, that scooped low enough to show off...
Harry had to be careful, or he was going to be sporting a prominent erection on a beach with a ton of families. He moved his gaze down past where he really wanted to look. The shirt came down to just above her knee and he saw a pair of flip flops discarded to the side of the blanket she had laid out in front of her stuff. “Nice day, huh?” She smiled as she twirled the umbrella stand into the sand.
“Tits—it’s really nice,” Harry said quickly stammering through his recovery.
Smooth.
She either didn’t notice his faux pas or didn’t care because she continued about her business. “Have you been here long?” She asked.
“Just arrived yesterday. Did some grocery shopping. Went for a jog.”
“Oh, how nice,” she had this infectious smile. Harry felt so happy just being around her. Or maybe it was the beautiful weather and the prettiest beach he had seen in years.
Or maybe it was her curvy figure that was making him lightheaded with happiness.
She pulled the shirt off finally, and Harry thought he might seriously need to leave. Head back for his little beach cottage to take care of blood rushing to his groin. She’s gorgeous. He thought to himself. “How ‘bout you?” He cleared his throat.
“I grew up here...and live here in the summer.”
He stared at her in surprise. “Here?” He asked.
She smiled and nodded. “It’s my favorite place on earth,” she explained.
“I can see why,” he nodded in appreciation. “Do you have any suggestions for while m’here?”
She nodded. “Plenty—how long are you here for?”
“Two weeks.”
“How lovely...let’s see...you’re at the beach—that’s most important in my opinion. I think if you stay here most of the time, you’ll have a successful vacation. There’s a place about twenty minutes from here where you can go clam digging if you like clams—I don’t really like them, but it’s fun to go. Paddleboarding on the river is also a really big thing. There’s this restaurant that everyone talks about. If you want, I know someone who works there, I could get you in. You’ll need a sweatshirt from the most touristy of tourist shops, but don’t go on a rainy day—everyone will be there. You’ll have to see the sunrise and the sunset. I think there’s a full moon too, so you’ll definitely want to see that over the ocean. I personally recommend ice cream and mini golf too. If you have time, you should also check out the nearby island. Even though this place is beautiful the island is like being in another country. It’s stunningly beautiful,” throughout her speech she continued working on the umbrella stand, putting the actual umbrella into place and tilting it back to create more shade.
Harry thought it would be really forward of him to invite her on all those adventures. Especially when someone as beautiful as she was surely had a significant other. Add in the fact he met her less than ten minutes ago; he would have seemed insane. “Wow, sounds like a packed schedule.”
She laughed and Harry swore he had never heard a sound as beautiful. She was still organizing her items and she gestured under the umbrella for Harry to move his stuff. “I’m really passionate about this place I forget people want to relax.”
“S’okay,” he chuckled. “You’re right t’be passionate. M’sure you’re right; I’ll make every effort t’do it all,” he promised and began moving his stuff below her umbrella. “Everyone is so nice here,” he told her. “Yourself included.”
“Why thank you,” she smiled sweetly and settled into her beach chair finally, facing the sun. He swore that someone this stunning couldn’t be real. She looked like a beach goddess—sun-kissed hair and skin. “What are you reading?” She asked, turning her head toward him covering the side of her face to keep the sun out of her eyes even though she wore sunglasses too.
He couldn’t even remember why he picked the book up. “Er...I fell asleep before finishing the first page,” he admitted shyly. She giggled.
“The beach does that, I swear. Something about total relaxation and the warm sun. I’m like a cat. Once I lay on my stomach, I’m out like a light.”
“Do you read?”
She nodded. “Have to; I’m a middle school teacher.”
“Oh,” Harry smiled. “I teach secondary.”
“No way!”
So, for the whole morning, Harry forgot about his book. Forgot about his playlist that was still going—except for anytime she asked what song was playing. They talked for literally three hours straight never once a lull in the conversation. Work, books, the beach, music, and anything they thought of. He told her about his family coming to visit for the weekend and she told him about her family who didn’t love this place as much as she did who would probably not visit—even if they missed her and loved her with everything in them.
At lunch they finally quieted their conversation to eat and watch the water. “I don’t see a burn,” she told him glancing over his face and skin as she finished her sandwich. He smiled.
“Thank you,” he said gratefully. “I’d be a proper crisp by now.”
She held the sunscreen out to him again. “I know this is a little weird, would you mind getting my upper back?” She asked.
Touch her? Harry didn’t have to be asked twice. Harry made sure to spray every bit of her skin. He didn’t want to be the reason she burned. As soft and beautiful as her skin was, Harry was glad she only asked to rub her back and shoulders. If he had to do her legs or any other part of her body, he definitely would have passed out.
She spread herself out on her blanket. Book near her face. “I’m so going to fall asleep,” she yawned. “Will you wake me if I start to burn?” She asked.
Harry nodded wordlessly and brought his book up toward his face. “Sure, love,” he murmured. Hopefully not showing how smitten he was with her already.
*
Harry might have wormed his way into her heart as her favorite person ever. It was so unlike her to wake a total stranger from a nap. But he was one of the most beautiful men she had ever seen in her life. She couldn’t imagine letting him roast in the sun all morning and ruining his vacation. It was even more unlike her to invite him to sit with her.
She liked to believe she was a kind soul—most everyone told her that she was, so it wasn’t unnatural for her to invite him to hang out with her. But if it wasn’t for the fact that Harry was a teacher, it could have been a lot more dicey.
It was so easy to talk to Harry. The entire morning was so much better than she ever expected just by being in his presence or chatting with him. Other than her reading-nap—where Harry woke her up after an hour so she could reapply another layer of sunscreen—they talked literally the whole day. Harry didn’t mind putting sunscreen on her and she returned the favor when they switched positions so Harry could get some on his back.
Touching him might be her new favorite pastime.
She left a bit before Harry wanting to go for a walk and shower before eating dinner and reading a bit on her porch. Plus, she had to pace herself if she was going to last at the beach all summer. After her shower, she put on an oversized shirt like she wore to the beach and a pair of shorts. It looked like she wasn’t wearing pants but didn’t mind. The sun finally crested the top of her cottage, so she was no longer baking in the sun and made the porch the loveliest little place to read and enjoy the evening. She had a bowl of watermelon chunks beside her, and sunglasses perched on her nose.
Growing up she never loved summer all that much. Of course, she loved the beach and the time off from school, but she started working part time when she was fourteen and summer never had the same feeling as it did when she was young until she started teaching. Now she would tutor virtually some nights throughout the summer—especially for college students taking summer courses. But mostly she spent her time here in the little beach cottage her grandma had specifically named to her in her will after she saw how much she cared for it—especially since she was the only one in her family who had summers off and still cared about this little town. Once her grandma passed away, no one really felt the need to stay—her parents sold the home she grew up in. It wasn’t brokenly tragic that her grandma died—she was old, and these things happened. Besides, she felt by being in the little town she grew up in and living in the cottage left to her was enough to live her summers in honor of her grandmother.
Her mother technically owned the other cottage her grandmother had and while her mom really wanted to sell it, she insisted she would take care of it while she was here and tend to any renters.
Which is why her mother texted her at least once a week about the renter at the cottage just three houses down the road. Our renter said there’s only one towel. Any ideas?
She gasped wondering how it slipped her mind to take the towels out of the dryer and fold them neatly into the bathroom linen closet. On it. She responded and practically ran down the road. She knocked on the door to her second home away from home and waited for the person on the other side to answer. While waiting she noticed the little sign below the main window was crooked—fell off the hook again in the ocean wind. She needed to remember to bring a pair of pliers back to close the loop the next time she came over.
The two cottages were almost identical. Except this door was a sea blue and hers was a sea green. They were little wooden cottages, shingled top to bottom. Just two windows at the front of the house, two on the back, and one on each side. There were two skylights in the roof allowing for lots of natural light. Each home had two small bedrooms, a bathroom, a spacious sitting area and full kitchen. They were wall to wall hardwood floors even though her Grandma in the 70s tried very hard to convince everyone it needed carpeting. But try vacuuming sand out of a beach cottage all the time. Due to space behind the home, hers had a little patio but this one was fitted with a little patio and an outdoor shower.
The blue door opened while she was still putting the wood block that read Sea View back in it’s place. “Uh...hello?” He asked. She turned to find Harry, surprise all across his face, to see the girl he met earlier outside his rental.
Of course it was Harry. “Oh, how funny!” She chirped excited to see the gorgeous man from the beach once more—her plan right now was to not-so-casually run into him at the beach again the next day. “I should have asked where you were renting!”
He smirked. “Hi love,” he said sweetly, confused that she was here. “Uh...what are you doing here?”
“My family owns this cottage,” she explained. “Mom texted me that you don’t have towels? That’s my fault. Left them in the dryer when I was cleaning on turnover day. I’ll fold them now,” she said and marched herself inside and maneuvered through the familiar room with ease.
“Oh,” Harry said. “S’okay, love. I didn’t mean t’bother you—I would have found them eventually—”
“Absolutely not, it’s your vacation! You deserve clean towels and not have to worry about looking for things,” she was already piling the fluffy array of sea blue and green towels out of the dryer and began folding them expertly. “I’m going to leave you my number so if you need anything you can just ask me. I always tell her to just give them my number, but she worries about weirdos taking advantage of me,” she rolled her eyes.
What would possess me to say that to Harry?
He smiled as he watched her flurry of activity. Her rambling little monologue. She was definitely scaring him. It occurred to her at that moment she didn’t even wait to be invited into his space. Just strode right in. “Glad m’not a weirdo. I agree with y’mum. Think I would like her,” he nodded firmly.
She felt her face warm, and she hoped the tan hid the blush as much as possible. Harry’s nose and cheeks looked a bit red—like he caught a bit of a cold. The rest of his body was covered by a simple pair of jogging shorts and a simple t-shirt so she couldn’t see if he burned and also didn’t want to be caught staring at him—especially thinking about the abs he had on display under the litany of tattoos she saw earlier at the beach. “Well, I will fold these and get out of your hair,” she said focusing on the towels. But her brain glitched out once more. “Oh, do you like surfing?” She asked.
He chuckled leaning against the frame of the door leading to this utility room. “Only been once with a group of m’friends. S’not m’cup of tea. M’not very good.”
“Oh, okay. I just want to make sure I recommend everything you might like.”
He was smirking at her like she was a bit crazy—and she was—but Harry wasn’t helping. Without sunglasses she saw he had green eyes. Green. She was done before this even started. Once all the towels were folded, she made herself at home once more, hurrying to the bathroom to put all the towels in place. The bathroom smelled like men’s cologne: sandalwood and sage. Jesus Christ it’s like he was built in a lab for me.
Harry followed her as she put the towels away in an alternating pattern. “Thank you,” he said. “Y’really didn’t need t’do all that.”
“You’re the guest. You paid to get this kind of service,” she reminded him. “I’m also...only three houses down if you need something as well. It’s got a sign like yours below the window Sun-Kissed Cabana. My grandma named them.”
He nodded and stared at her for a few moments. She had only known Harry for all of five hours, but she could swear she knew his thoughts. He probably did think she was a bit crazy. “Do...do y’have plans for dinner?”
She felt her heart flutter. She was going to order her favorite pesto pasta dish from a local place that practically recognized her voice when she called. “Uh...no.”
“Would y’like t’go out with me in ‘bout an hour?” He asked.
She nodded eagerly. “Yes, please.”
*
She was finishing up her makeup when her phone vibrated with a second message from Harry. The first one was to alert her who was messaging Hiii, it’s Harry Xx. Followed by: Does this place have a fancy dress code?
No, no. Nothing fancy at all! They’ve def got a beach bar vibe.
Cool :) I’m ready when you are.
Shit. She wanted to curl her hair a bit and look extra nice but maybe that would have looked like she was trying too hard after she just got through telling him it wasn’t a fancy place. She had on a maxi dress. Black top nothing revealing and then the skirt pattern had sunflowers all over it. She would have to forgo the curls and instead pushed the front of her hair back with a headband. Just need like five more minutes.
I’m in no rush, love. Please take your time Xx.
She thought she was going to melt. Fortunately, her tanned skin hid most of the imperfections of her face. She also preferred maxi dresses because it hid the thickness of her thighs and more imperfections like bumps from shaving and bruises from whacking herself on her beach chair. She thought the style she chose also perfectly accentuated the curve of her waist. While it didn’t show off her cleavage—it was her personal belief her boobs were one of her better assets—she thought after a day at the beach with them on full display due to her bathing suit, dinner might be a little gentler without them in Harry’s face the whole time.
With a spritz of her perfume and gathering all her necessary belongings into her purse, slid on her favorite pair of sandals with gold brushed embellishments, and headed outside. There wasn’t really a discussion of how they would get there, but she decided to walk down the road back to Sea View. Harry was crouched by the sign, pliers in hand closing the very loop she said she would. “Oh, I’m sorry. You didn’t have to do that,” she said hurriedly feeling like a terrible hostess.
He turned and smiled at her. “No worries, love. S’easy. Jus’ found some pliers in the utility closet.”
“Well, thank you,” she murmured gratefully. Harry stood, putting the pliers just inside the doorway before locking it with the passcode. He turned to her.
“Is this place walking distance, or should I drive us?” He asked. His hair was fluffed in these beautiful chocolate waves that of course reminded her of the beach but made her want to bury her hands in it and kiss his perfect face until she was out of breath.
“Uh,” she didn’t think she wanted to walk in a dress, but maybe that was the experience of this vacation for him. Harry looked utterly comfortable but perfect (naturally) in a pair of navy-blue khaki shorts and grey short sleeve button down. The lack of sleeves showed off those tattoos that she was continuously falling for. On his feet he wore a pair of light grey sneakers. “We can walk, but it might take me a while in a dress and sandals.”
“Oh shit, of course. What m’I saying? Y’can’t walk in a pretty dress like that,” he said hurrying to the car and opening the passenger side. “After you, love. Jus’ need t’tell me the directions,” he smiled at her.
All the books she had brought to her summer vacation had a romantic flare to them. Her only thought was there should be a book written about this very day—meeting Harry at the beach and going on a date with him. It was impractical and a bit flighty of her to be so taken with him already.
But there was no way she could help it when he got in the driver’s seat, smiled at her with those dreamy dimples and his eyes twinkled at her behind those pretty lashes of his. “Y’look gorgeous, love.”
*
It was effortless how much he enjoyed her company. The idea that it was only his first full day and he had already had a good beach day and another good jog under his belt. The post-beach-and-jog shower was cold-watered but steamy as he thought of the pretty girl in her pretty bathing suit. He imagined her smile, the gentle curve of her lips as he wrapped his hand around his cock as the water cooled off his sweaty and warm skin for several minutes until he was finally relieved of seeing her...assets at the beach.
Seeing her immediately after he inquired about the lack of towels as soon as he had shorts on was like a dream. Her agreeing to dinner with a beautiful girl was not what he expected when he booked this trip six months ago. Only one day in and this was the best vacation he had ever been on.
They arrived at the restaurant and after searching through the menu in silence, they placed drinks and an appetizer to share.
Did he mention how effortless this all was? The conversation was once more not a moment of dullness. She was funny, beautiful, kind, and it seemed that everyone at the restaurant knew her at least a little bit. “Our sun-kissed angel is here!” A man shouted from across the patio where they were seated. Everyone turned to follow the gaze of the man and Harry smirked instead of being jealous because he was right. She was an angel. A tanned, lovely, gorgeous angel.
She rolled her eyes. “Harry, this is my friend Louis. I used to work here in the summer.”
“Before she went off an got a real job, like a traitor.”
Harry was fascinated by her, simply put. He wanted to spend forever at dinner with her. Chatting with her. Looking at her beautiful face. Envying how the sun got to kiss her, and he didn’t.
*
“Okay, well...we can’t not get ice cream,” she said knowingly.
“You just told the waiter you were too full for dessert,” he chuckled at her.
“You don’t get dessert at a restaurant when there are literally seven different ice cream shops within spitting distance,” she rolled her eyes. “Summer is for ice cream. If we hurry, we can see a sunset too.”
“Y’sure know how t’get the most out of a summer day.”
She frowned. “Oh...I’m sorry. I forget that you only have two weeks. We don’t have to. We can head back,” she said softly. “I’m sorry.”
“No, not at all, love. S’a great idea,” he reached out across the console and rested his hand on her thigh near her knee. With the long dress covering her legs, it wasn’t terribly inappropriate, but it was so instinctive to reach out and touch her he felt he made a mistake when she was suddenly speechless. Unable to tell Harry where to go to get her precious ice cream. “Er...sorry,” he said pulling his hand back to rest on the gearshift between them. “Should have asked,” he felt his face warm in embarrassment.
“N-no, it’s okay,” she nodded quickly. Her voice was breathy as she stammered. “I was...” She shook her head. “You can touch me—I mean,” she put a hand over her face in embarrassment at the encouragement she just gave him. Harry decided to quickly put her out of her misery—he did say tits after looking at her for thirty seconds this morning, even if she didn’t hear it. He gave her leg a gentle squeeze as he moved his hand back to where it was. She was silent again once more and she rested one hand over his. Letting a few of her fingers fill the space between his but not twining them fully together. “Is this okay?” She asked softly.
Harry melted over her sweetness. “Perfect.”
*
They ate their ice cream on the beach sitting on the tall, white lifeguard stand since it was late. There was a smattering of running kids, a few dogs, and families littered closer to the water on the tidal flats. But no one was over where they were. Up on the soft sand encroaching on the dunes. They chatted in between licks and bites of ice cream and Harry was certain he was falling deeper and deeper in love with her by the millisecond. It was ridiculous. Love at first sight couldn’t possibly be real. He had three or four serious girlfriends (four if you counted his junior high love affair, three if you didn’t) all of whom he did fall in love with but over the course of weeks and months. Not minutes and hours. Maybe it was the salt air playing with his brain chemistry.
Certainly, it had something to do with the beautiful girl sitting so close to him he could feel her sun-kissed skin warming him from the gentle breeze floating off the water as the sun started its descent over the horizon. She took her phone from her purse and snapped a picture quickly. Hardly looked at it, barely centered it, yet it was the most beautiful sunset picture he’d ever seen.
“Are y’a photographer in y’free time?” He asked.
She snorted. “No, I do like taking pictures. But I have hundreds of these,” she said showing him the photo album of various sunset pictures she had taken over the years. Harry could see why she was so good at them. No two pictures looked alike which had to be a poem somewhere out there. Harry always considered himself a winter—growing up in cold England would do that to a person—and no two snowflakes were alike. Snowflakes had nothing on her sunsets.
“D’you want t’take a picture together?” He asked quietly.
She smirked. “Do I have chocolate on my face?” She wrinkled her nose at him.
Chuckling, he shook his head. “No,” he promised. Harry wrapped an arm around her waist pulling her snuggly against him. “S’this okay?” he asked almost directly into her ear. She nodded and smiled as she flipped her camera around to selfie mode. Harry had one arm around her waist, the other holding his ice cream cone. She reached her arm out to take the picture while she held her cup of ice cream in her lap with the other. Gazing at her screen, Harry couldn’t believe how effortless it felt to touch her. It was so easy to talk to her. And they looked like the perfect beach couple. “Can y’send that to me?” He murmured in her ear once more. She nodded mutely. Harry didn’t remove his arm from around her waist and he continued eating his ice cream.
Once finished with their treat, they continued chatting and watching the sunset listening to the laughter of families on the beach. The sky was so pretty Harry thought that she was right. This was the best place on earth.
*
They walked back to their cottages hand in hand, Harry stopping outside the door for the place labeled Sun-Kissed Cabana. “S’that why Louis calls you a sun-kissed angel?”
She rolled her eyes. “He’s something else.”
Harry chuckled. Leaned forward and swept his lips on the apple of her cheek. “I had the perfect first day with you, love,” he said softly. “Sleep well,” he hummed and turned to walk three houses down. She pressed a hand on her cheek like a lovesick idiot. She nearly forgot the code to get into her own house and felt like floating all the way to her room where she giggled and kicked across her bed as she smiled into her pillow.
*
The next three days were spent almost the same as the first. The beach: complete with reading, naps, and lots of talking to the pretty girl he liked so much already. Followed by a run, a shower, and then dinner. Harry tried really hard not to touch her without asking. The only allowance he gave himself to touch her without asking was when he truly felt like her back was getting a little singed. On the second day she made the grilled chicken salad she told Harry she was going to make before he invited her to dinner, but once he informed her he was a pescetarian she hurried to the store to get him some fish to grill instead. It was totally unnecessary, and Harry felt guilty she spent money on him like that for dinner (even though he was insistent he pay for dinner and ice cream the first night). Regardless, it was a delicious salad paired with zucchini noodles that truly tasted just like pasta. Harry made her write the recipe down for him.
“I can’t run at all,” she wrinkled her nose when Harry offered to join her on her evening walk the following day.
“I’d rather walk with y’then, love,” he said softly with a smile. “If y’want company, that is.”
She wanted to say she wanted Harry’s company. But thought that was a bit too much. But they walked side by side, Harry gently ushering her to the inside of the road without making any fuss about it. They continued their comfortable chattering. Talking of anything and everything. That night they ordered pizza that was delivered to Sea View and watched a movie in his living room, her feet in his lap where he rubbed the soles of her aching feet without prompting or full acknowledgement.
By the end of the third day, she thought Harry might be her best friend. He made crispy cauliflower tacos. He spent the evening simply reading on her back porch with her in comfortable, perfect silence.
*
The fourth day, they were sitting on her back porch again, sipping bubbly wine spritzers that she put in glasses of ice and combined with a popsicle to match the flavors. Harry thought it was sinful the way she licked the pop. Harry wanted to jump her bones so very badly.
“How do you like the outdoor shower?” She asked looking up at the sky full of stars. There was a citronella candle between them to keep the bugs away and she had a solar set of lights strung about her little patio. She was in a soft warm glow from the lights. Once more, looking sun kissed. She was wearing a shorter dress than the other day, shorts beneath it. She informed him about the shorts because she said it was an athletic-type dress and she may have sat weird and didn’t want to make him uncomfortable.
Harry thought there wasn’t anything she could do to make him uncomfortable.
“I haven’t used it, actually. M’not sure I—”
She made an almost inhuman noise, a cross between a growl and gasp. It was quite adorable even if she seemed miffed and Harry wished he could have recorded the sound because he thought he would listen to it on loop for the rest of forever. “Harry!” She almost shouted. “The sole reason I took Sun-Kissed Cabana over Sea View was because I knew the outdoor shower would be a huge selling point for renters. You haven’t used it?” She looked nearly betrayed.
He chuckled, sipping his drink. “M’sorry, love. I didn’t realize—”
“Harry, I’m not kidding. You have to go use it. Like right now.”
He laughed loudly. If there could possibly be a downside of this little beach-cottage neighborhood, it would be that the houses were quite close, and Harry’s loud laughter could probably be heard back at his own place. But she was staring at him seriously. He thought she really expected him to get up and leave at this moment so he could get this experience.
“Y’serious?” He asked smirking at her.
“I don’t joke about the outdoor shower,” she promised him.
Finishing his popsicle and taking the last sips of his drink he stood from her little patio table and shook his head with a chuckle at her. “I guess m’going.”
He wanted to invite her. Especially if she didn’t have one here at Cabana. It sounded like she would like it more. “You better,” she continued licking the pop and Harry was grateful he would at least have a new image to think about in the outdoor shower when he imagined his hand around his dick was her mouth instead.
*
The air was cool but somehow warm. Sort of like the water on his skin. He could see the draw and actually surprised himself that he hadn’t used the shower yet. He imagined in the morning it would be heaven—most of his showers had been in the afternoon or evening since he was running at that time. But maybe he could take two showers a day—who cared? He was on vacation.
Was it heavenly? Her message read.
Harry thought about how much how active his imagination got picturing her in that shower with him, his hand fisting over himself until he imagined her pretty cleavage covered in him instead of flowing with the water down the drain. Extremely. But of course, he left out why it was so heavenly. You should write a book of recommendations for your guests.
:) You can come back over if you want. I know I kind of kicked you out, but like I said. I’m very serious about outdoor showers.
Chuckling to himself, he hurried to get dressed again and meet her back there.
*
She knew Harry’s family was coming today so she told him that she would give him all kinds of space but if he needed anything, he was not to hesitate to ask her. “M’mum and sister would love t’meet you, kitten,” he promised. He didn’t mean to call her kitten. But it rolled off the tongue so effortlessly and she was the one who said she felt like a cat in the sun. But he didn’t spend long thinking about it and continued his little speech. “Y’don’t have t’evade us.”
“I’m sure you want family time,” she promised. “Really, it’s fine. Plus, we’ll have a whole other week to do our little routine,” she felt her face warm as she spoke realizing she just told Harry she wanted to spend the remainder of his vacation together. She opened her mouth to backtrack almost instantly, but Harry beat her to the punch before she could speak again.
Given that Harry was this close to telling her he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, another full week spent together seemed like a great idea. “I can’t wait,” he promised.
They decided to do a sunrise that morning. She brought a blanket and was wrapped up in a long sleeve shirt along with a pair of sweatpants. She advised Harry to do the same. “The air is still cool from the night when you get to the beach early,” she explained the night before they parted to go to bed.
They were laying on the blanket angled by the natural slope of the dunes so they could see the view of the sun cresting on the ocean horizon. “Do y’have as many sunrise pictures?” He asked tiredly. With the sun rising at just after five-thirty she was courteous and kind in asking that they get there at five so they could see the dawn and array of beautiful colors painting the sky before the sun got there.
She giggled. “No way. Too early to see it that many times. I do like sunrises more, though,” she said. “It’s so much quieter. It’s not as hot. I don’t know. I think sunrises are just so beautiful.”
He immediately, silently agreed with her that they were. No matter how much he was enjoying sunsets with her. He would wake up at 4:45 every day if it meant watching something she found beautiful, and it made her happy. Harry had her pulled to his side again, his arm looped beneath the back of her neck. His eyes were closed as he fiddled with a strand of her hair running his fingers through the soft tendrils. “Harry,” she whispered after a few minutes. Harry felt the edges of sleep and the dreamworld starting to meld together on his brain. “You’re gonna miss it,” her voice was so gentle. Perfect for morning. She was the most beautiful thing he had laid eyes on but he couldn't bring himself to open them right now.
“Hmm,” he hummed. Refusing to open his eyes. “S’okay. We can see it another day,” he mumbled.
She giggled. “Harry,” she whispered so gently. It felt like magic. Warmth spread through his whole body. “We woke up so early,” she reminded him.
He nodded. “M’sorry,” he sighed. “It’s so peaceful,” he muttered. “You’re warm,” he turned his face to bury his nose in her hair and he nuzzled closer to her. Harry being a cuddler didn’t surprise her. He was quite touchy. But this sent her heart into a frenzy, and she forgot why they were there.
“Harry,” she whispered again feeling brave. Maybe because it was too early, and her brain wasn’t functioning.
“Jus’ lemme sleep, kitten. Please?” He muttered into her hair. “Wake me in twenty-nine minutes.”
She swallowed. “But...I want to kiss you,” she sounded so shy.
Harry’s eyes sprung open, and he pulled back from her quickly to look at her beautiful, perfect face. “M’awake,” he promised and gently cupped her cheeks, his fingers slipping through her hair, and he brought her face closer to his. Kissing her like he had been dreaming about over the last five days was the only thing on his mind.
She moaned against his mouth and Harry was really looking forward to that outdoor shower now. She pressed against him, keening as she licked into his mouth, sucking on his lower lip. Driving him absolutely mad as she nipped at his lip gently with her teeth. She could feel herself squeezing her thighs together for relief because she was finally kissing Harry the way she wished she did at sunset on his first night here.
Harry’s hands were cool against her flushed cheeks. “Kitten,” he hummed against her mouth, pecking at her like he would die without her kisses. “Y’taste so good,” he sighed dreamily.
She rolled to her side to face him squarely while he returned to his side too, instead of hovering over her. He wrapped his arm around her waist pulling her against him. Over the past four days at the beach, she had tried really hard not to stare at whatever was going on in Harry’s swimsuit, so she didn’t look like a sex-maniac. But there was no way she could ignore the hard dick she felt against her thigh as she pressed against the full length of his body. She imagined Harry fucking her so hard in that outdoor shower that the neighbors would have no way of ignoring what was happening. She moaned at the idea once more against his lips, thighs pressing together.
“Oh no,” he hummed. If she wasn’t already so drunk in love with Harry after one date and four days together, she might have thought his voice sounded a bit mocking. Slowly, he rolled onto his back holding onto her and perching her body on top of him as he did. One of his legs separated her thighs apart. “Do y’need something from me, love?” He cooed almost lovingly at the idea she was aching between her legs. He kept her pulled down toward him so he could continue kissing her, effectively melting all coherent thought.
Holy shit, his voice. Oh my God.
Without meaning to, she clenched her legs once more, this time, wrapped around Harry’s thigh causing friction, despite two layers of sweatpants and her underwear (at least those were thin). “N-no,” she almost whimpered trying to get away from his leg. Harry put his hands on her hips and gently pressed her back down toward him while bending his knee a bit. His thigh came closer in contact with her so if she wanted to, she could rub right against him.
“Y’sure, love? You look like y’might need something,” his voice was so sultry. It was too early for this. His eyes were somehow a deeper green. His lips were too pink after kissing her.
“N-no,” she shook her head despite wanting nothing more than to grind her pelvis against his thigh. She knew what it looked like beneath the sweatpants. She knew the tattoos that dotted his skin. Fuck, she wanted to get herself off so bad. But she was acutely aware of her position and tried to lift herself off his leg. “I-I think m’too heavy,” she stammered again.
He groaned and pulled her tighter against his leg. “No way, angel,” he promised. “Go ahead, know y’want to. I want y’to,” his voice was a bit husky. Like he was a bit confused. She groaned softly. God she wanted to. “That’s it,” he encouraged as she ground herself against him.
She felt flush, wishing she wasn’t wearing sweatpants. They were getting in the way. The long sleeve shirt was making her warmer. Or maybe it was Harry that was making her warm. Harry helped shift her hips back and forth against his leg as she moaned and whimpered as she rutted against his thigh. “Y’look so pretty, kitten,” he cooed. “Getting off on m’thigh like that. S’making me so hard, love. Fuck,” he moaned. “You’re s’pretty.”
She continued creating friction on between the two of them worried she would give herself a burn from all the fabric rubbing together but she was so fucking wet she was certain she would slide easily against him if she could take her pants off in public. The sun was still rising, not quite up over the horizon yet, but the sky was brighter, creating a gorgeous image of her beautiful body silhouetted from the light. “S’good, so good, baby,” he groaned. She whined and continued rutting herself against him.
“Harry,” she croaked.
“Yeah, love? Y’gonna come for me? Gonna come from jus’ m’thigh?”
Jesus Christ, she felt like she was a virgin. She was almost certain she was. Had she ever even had an orgasm before Harry? When was the last time she had sex? When was the last time she masturbated? Holy shit. This was bad. He was all consuming and he was fully clothed, and it was just his thigh.
She nodded at his words. Even though she felt a bit silly and stupid for doing this, with two layers of sweatpants between them. “Yeah? Good, want y’to. Y’look so pretty all—”
“Fucking hell,” she whimpered and dropped her face to his chest as she twitched against him. Harry flexed his muscle, gripping her hips and rubbing her against him so he could help her ride out the waves of her orgasm for a few moments. After that, Harry dropped his knee once more, letting her flatten against him. He kissed her forehead as she breathed heavily against him, shaky and sighing as she let the euphoria course through her. He rubbed up and down her back as she did, and he breathed deeply into her hair. She smelled like sunscreen and coconut.
“I really like sunrises,” he murmured. She smirked. Her face against his chest. “Y’sleepy, now, kitten?”
She nodded. “Yeah,” her voice was a bit quiet. Almost unsure. “Sorry,” she mumbled, nuzzling her face against his shirt.
He shook his head, kissing the top of her hair once more. “Don’t be sorry. Been thinking ‘bout y’coming all over me since I met you.”
She giggled. “Yeah?”
Maybe he shouldn’t have said that. It wasn’t very...flattering on his part. It also made it sound like he only liked her for the idea of sex. Which wasn’t the case. He liked her so much simply because she was the sweetest, nicest person he had had the pleasure of meeting for a really long time.
She rolled off him. He kind of hated it because even though it wasn’t freezing cold, it felt like it now that she wasn’t laying on his body. She looked at the outline of the bulge stretching against his gray sweatpants. It was still ten minutes until the sun would be touching the horizon. “Fair’s fair, yeah?” She wondered, looking up at him and then back down at the somehow growing outline. She would be lucky if he fit in her mouth.
“Angel, y’don’t have to jus’ because—”
She frowned. “Do...you not want me to?” She wondered, confused and worried that he was rejecting her. She didn’t know why if he had just used her thigh to get him off.
“No, no,” he said quickly wanting to ease the worry he saw fill her beautiful face. God he would rather die than reject her. “I mean...y’can do whatever y’want to m’body,” he nodded eagerly. “Jus’ don’t want you t’think you have to. Been thinking ‘bout—” his voice choked off as she outlined the bulge. “Oh...s’nice,” he moaned forgetting everything he was saying about what she could do to him. Her fingertip simply ran along absent-minded paths along his length. He struggled to remember the last time he had sex because he could only imagine the episode in the outdoor shower as the last time he orgasmed.
She giggled. “Nice?” She questioned; Harry was so polite. The way he walked with her on the inside of the road, the way he held her door open no matter if they were going in the house or the car, or if he simply carried her heavy cooler off the beach even though he was carrying his own belongings. For him to say it was nice the way she was touching his dick was simply...something else.
He nodded breathlessly. “Yeah,” he was already too far gone with just her goddamn finger touching him. He couldn’t have made any comment further if he wanted to. He moaned as she squeezed gently along the length of him. Five minutes till sunrise and the beach would be covered in light. She glanced around quickly, seeing they were still alone. She had never done this in the five years she had been staying the summer back in town keeping an eye on Sea View while living in Sun-Kissed Cabana.
“Do you think I could make you come in five minutes?” She whispered.
He groaned almost animalistically. “Love, I think y’could make me come in forty-five seconds,” he promised. And with that, she dipped her head toward his waist just until the sun was ready to cross over the horizon.
*
It was quite difficult not to text Harry all day long while his family visited. It was entirely due to having an orgasm at his hand (thigh); the creeping need to bond to the person who just made her entire world flip upside down was a prominent feeling throughout her body the whole day. The words of her book didn’t make any sense, so she opted for cleaning her bathroom. But that proved to be difficult too, and she spilled most of the mop water back onto the floor. After another fit of cleaning that up, she decided to spend her time at the grocery store since she was getting dangerously low on her much-needed items. She nearly forgot to go to the checkout line. After putting everything away she thought about just going to bed at three in the afternoon just to rid her mind of how crazy she was being and how awkwardly she missed her summer guy.
Fortunately, Harry broke first, before she fell asleep.
I know it’s silly, but I miss you terribly.
She felt so much relief reading his message. Oh, thank God. Me too.
You really should just come over. Mum and Gemma want to meet you. I won’t shut up about you. It’s...a bit pathetic how obsessed I sound actually. Mum’s in the outdoor shower while Gemma is taking pictures of the beach. We’re going to have dinner in a bit—you should join us. He put this shy little emoji after his message.
She was currently dressed in a pair of bike shorts and t-shirt that fell past her hips, barely a strip of the shorts showed. She had her hair pulled back by a claw clip. She wanted to go over there immediately. However, her outfit and hair did not look ready to meet Harry’s family. Plus, she was worried she would do something stupid like sit in Harry’s lap in front of his mother and sister and then she would have to jump out a window to hide her infatuation.
I would love to, but really...I’m sure they want to see you.
They want to ‘meet the girl that’s got me all flustered’ that I nearly dropped all our snack bar food in the sand today :)
She giggled. Glad he was also affected by their sunrise romp in the sand. Maybe tomorrow? She hedged instead. She really didn’t want to intrude.
Please, love. That would be wonderful.
*
She must have fallen asleep anyway. But she woke up to a knock at her door. She felt the claw clip sliding out of the back of her hair and she rubbed her eye as she made her way over. There stood Harry and two women outside the screen door. Each of them was holding a dish of (presumably) food. Immediately, she felt underdressed and stupid looking. “Uh, hey beautiful,” he smiled gently. “Sorry t’bother you. But seems the barbeque back there is out of gas,” he explained. “I sent y’a text—”
“Harry, the poor girl was sleeping,” his mother admonished. “I told you we could just go out to eat. Love, m’so sorry. I swear some days he was raised in a barn!” She shook her head. “We’ll leave you be.”
“No, no,” she shook her head quickly, the clip clattering from the ends of her hair to the floor. She felt her face warm, once more grateful for the tan skin to hide most of the blush rushing to her cheeks. She opened the door for them to enter and quickly swept the clip into her hands. “Make yourselves at home,” she said, and Harry ushered his mother toward the kitchen and out the back door toward the patio and grill. Gemma walked slower behind her family to give some reassurance to the girl who was struggling to fix her hair in the little entry way mirror.
“M’sorry about both of them in advance,” Gemma whispered. “Harry hasn’t been able to function normally all day and Mum is already in love with you. When you didn’t answer, it was the first coherent thought Mum had about not begging to see you and thus began Harry pacing waiting all of four minutes for your response before he said we could just come over like absolute lunatics.”
Oh God she liked Gemma. “Thank you. I’m so sorry I look like this,” she winced at the image of her reflection. She was all frizz and pillow lines from the couch where she fell asleep.
She snorted. “Please, we interrupted your evening. Your quiet time and relaxation. Don’t worry about it. You look beautiful,” she promised pressing a hand on her arm and headed after her brother and mother.
If she wasn't already--which she was pretty sure she was--Harry’s lovely little family was going to ensure she fell so hopelessly and terribly in love with Harry.
--
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burningcheese-merchant · 23 days ago
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How on earthbread do you ship BurningCheese. Im gonna try to not judge you. This is 80% a non-rethorical question. like genuinely how do you ship them?? /lh
I was wondering when someone would come ask me this lol. It's ok though, you can be honest, I can feel you narrowing your eyes at me through the screen 👀
I could honestly go on for a REALLY long time about why I ship BurningCheese/GoldenSpice. But I'll try to distill/narrow down my thoughts the best I can so my answer isn't longer than the Bible
I adore the enemies to lovers trope and hero/villain pairings in general. I did long before Cookie Run and I will long afterwards
I like how they complement and contrast against each other, aesthetically + personality-wise + backstory-wise
I love how they interact with each other. I love how they talk and snipe at each other. Golden Cheese's frustrated yet unyielding confidence and wit VS Burning Spice's brash, raucous excitement is fun to see. (The back-and-forth they have during their fight in episode 6 is dangerously close to how I've written them in my fics, even before the episode came out. So technically, in a way, my fics have been canonized lol)
It's fun imagining them together in different ways. A one-sided crush/obsession on Burning Spice's part is fun in a dark way (my Yandere Spice). So is a mutual love and respect between them. Main canon for me is a slow burn romance and a slow redemption arc for Spice alongside it. I also have an AU where Golden corrupts and becomes a Beast herself, and they become an evil villain couple. I have another where Spice doesn't get better and Golden doesn't get worse, they just have the standard forbidden love affair that they hide from the world (the latter out of fear of judgement, the former just so no one can try to keep them apart). I've got a million story ideas with them. You can do all sorts of things with them imo. And I think it works because of how they bounce off of each other. Put them in different situations and see how their relationship changes/adjusts/adapts, see if love can exist and how
I like their size difference. Spice is significantly taller and wider than Golden and it's really funny to see lol
The way they and their relationship/dynamic parallel actual Egyptian and Indian mythology (the latter in particular) is absolutely unreal
Not kidding, I can go on about the symbolism and allusions and references forever. I could write an actual paper on it. How can a ship go THIS hard
Come on, don't act like they wouldn't give each other a fantastic time in bed lmao
They follow each other around in my kingdom almost 24/7. Literally every single time I log in they're next to each other or one is trailing behind the other while they walk somewhere. If they want to be together that badly, I'm not going to stop them
They are literally the cycle of life and death, they have the single most important connection of all the Beasts and Ancients, one simply cannot go on without the other for together they make up the foundation of the goddamn cosmos
It actually all started with me and someone irl joking about Burning Spice having a stalker crush when the very first trailer came out. Then I went "haha that could be a funny fic". Then I wrote it and went "wait this is an interesting idea". Then episode 5 came out and I went "wait wtf does he actually want her??? He's acting like he does in my fic!!!" Then I wrote more and got even more attached to the one-sided attraction dynamic. Then I started imagining them in an actual, normal relationship and how that might pan out. Then I started writing stuff for/about that and I got extremely attached to that. Now they have a fully fleshed out relationship and they're married and have two kids, and I have a billion side stories and AUs, and any other ship involving either of them viscerally repulses me. I unironically memed too close to the sun and immediately fell straight down into BurningCheese hell (but it's ok, I like it here and I don't plan on leaving ever)
I can and I want to and no one can stop me
I still wrote a Bible, didn't I lol. BurningCheese/GoldenSpice is perfect in every way, they are my ride-or-die and you can pry the ship from my cold, dead hands. The end, roll credits
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slater-baby · 10 days ago
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Texas Red Update!!
Okay guys let's FINALLY address the elephant in the room. First of all, I wanna get your most burning question out of the way: I HAVE BEEN WRITING IT THIS WHOLE TIME LMAO Like I said, I don't abandon works. I might let them sit for a while, but I have never thought of abandoning Texas Red, nor will I ever. That being said, however, I have some relatively important reasons for not having released the next chapter yet. Here they are so that you guys understand!!!
Okay so, in terms of story creation, we've gotten through the first arc. We're entering the second (which will have some important changes to the first). However, for those of you that aren't aware, I've written Texas red entirely without any planning. Everything you've read thus far? Made it up as I went along lmao. Usually, it can work out pretty well. However, we've reached a part of the story where there actually needs to be concrete plans and resolutions, and I hit a goddamn wall on that front.
I changed the ending of the book (and, yes, it's literally novel length already--my estimates place the final word count somewhere between 250-350K words in total). My original thoughts about what the ending were had to change given what was already written, so.....basically had to refigure how I'm gonna get us from point A to point B in the story. NOTHING ABOUT WHATS ALREADY WRITTEN HAS CHANGED!! It's only future events that I've had to reconsider.
Idk if any of you have picked up on the messaging I'm trying to convey through the characters just yet, but in the second act, the theme of the story is a BIG, BIG thing!! Like, it's both fun, exciting, adventurous, and complicated. On one hand, it's going to be a lot of action, but on the other, it requires creating caricatures I've never considered before--mostly in reference to moral concepts.
My real life is HELLA complicated. Writing isn't what I do for a living, and sometimes, finding the time to be online is pretty difficult. Basically, I'm busy as fuck, this year is crazy for me, and I've been dealing with helllaaaaaa writer's block.
So there you have it folks!! There is good news though. Why, you might ask yourself, did I wait so long to make this post? Why didn't I make this post like a month ago? Well, I have an answer for you.
Chapter 20 will be released VERY soon!
I've rewritten it several times over, still don't exactly like where it is right now, but this chapter has been a huge work in progress. I'm a perfectionist when it comes to things like this, and I'm not going to release a story/chapter to all of you people if I don't believe in it. Your passion and support guys are my biggest motivation for writing, and to do that enthusiasm justice, I won't lie to you if I think my own story craft isn't up to par.
So, in short, I'm sorry for making y'all wait this long, but!!!
We are back!!
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writeforthepeople · 3 months ago
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Heyy! I've been thinking about Damien and the reader being in a YouTube short film together playing as a married couple and as filming goes on they find themselves actually falling for each other 😩😩 specifically a scene where they're lying in bed together and have to face each other all closely and they're staring into each other's eyes all soft UGHH anyways! I would love if you could write a lil fic like that 🥹🫶 even if you don't end up writing it ty for reading this req!
Absolutely LOVE this idea. The UGHH says it alllllll. Summary: You are cast in a short film your friend Amanda is working on and you are playing Damien's love interest! While you always strive to be as professional as possible, the acting feels a bit too real...and maybe it is?
Warning: No smut, slow burn. Word Count: 4k ... I might have gotten carried away with this one.
You woke up to an early alarm, you had to wake up earlier than usual to start getting ready for your first day on a new set. Your friend Amanda was making her first short film and decided to cast you, of course, you were excited to work on the project because you love her, but you would have been willing to do any part of the project to help. You getting cast as the love interest to the main character certainly gave you a confidence boost though. Nerve racking? Sure! but exciting none the less.
You continued going over the script for what must have been the 10th time as you finished getting ready this morning. It was a romantic comedy about the main character, Gideon Hale who is able to see ghosts. He makes a living running a small bed and breakfast, but on the side he is a bit of an 'Afterlife Coach' (the name of the film) where he coaches ghosts on getting through the afterlife. He meets an old friend (you) who is back in town after many years for a mutual friends wedding. The story focuses on his journey helping the ghosts around him and getting to know you and falling in love. You were a little nervous for a few of the more romantic scenes, but it is nothing you haven't done before. You've been in many plays and projects where you have had to kiss or be romantic with a partner. This one felt different though, you had met Damien a few times through Amanda and somehow knowing him made it feel a bit awkward. Not to mention the fact that you thought he was incredibly attractive, but that would only help the acting be easier, right? It didn't take long to get to the filming location, Smosh had offered to let Amanda use some of their space for filming. When you walked in you were immediately greeted by Erin, the set coordinator. We chatted for a few moments before she brought me to the set Amanda was working on. You were blown away with all the effort that had gone into really making the set look like a bed and breakfast. There was a lobby, a kitchen, and a bedroom plotted out for various scenes. "Y/N!! You're here!" you heard Amanda's familiar voice yell out as she made her way over to you. She was beaming, and it made you smile. "I'm here and ready to work!" you said, giving her a quick hug. "I hope you are here and ready to fall in love because we are about to make magic" She laughed, but you knew there would be more jokes to come on that front. You looked around and didn't see Damien yet but you noticed several other familiar faces from Amanda's parties. It looked like Angela was running the show, directing and moving people about. You think to your self, this must be the most serious you've ever seen her.
"Damien is wrapping in hair and make-up, he has a few scenes to shoot before you enter so once he is done you're next in the chair!" Amanda talked as she led you to the small room right off the stage. "Hey Trina, this is Y/N, she's up after my little star here" he pointed to Damien, waving her finger around in a funny gesture. She walked off without saying anything else. "Hi Y/N, you can take a seat we are almost done here" Trina said and Damien smiled "How are you feeling?" he asked you politely "I'm good, a bit nervous but I am excited" you admitted, trying to hold back your surprise. His hair was different. Last you had seen him his hair was getting long, but was distinctly dyed a silvery white, but the man sitting in the chair has more of a slick backed 90's look and was dyed completely black. "How about you?" you asked, not mentioning the hair. "I'm good" he said not moving his head as Trina added hair spray and tapped him on the shoulder "You are set" she she smiled and turned back to her kit. You watched as Damien examined his look and quickly turned to you "I've never had black hair, how does it look" it was as if he was scanning your features for an answer. You shook your head "it suits you. I like it a lot" you admitted, your cheeks a bit red. "Did you dye it just for the role?" you follow up with and he smiled and nodded "It felt very Gideon" he said with a chuckle "plus Amanda had a vision and who was I to say no to that?" he added. "Well hopefully I don't have to dye mine, but anything for Amanda right?" you smiled.
"Luckily your hair just needs styled" Trina chimes in. "You ready to hop in the chair?" she asked and you nodded, standing up. "Well I will see you out there" Damien said, leaving the room with a wave. "What a nice boy" Trina said after he left and you nodded "he's really sweet" you agreed. "So, you are the love interest huh?" she turned you to the mirror and talked through a bit of Amanda's vision and you got started. You didn't need anything to crazy, she was going to style your hair and put on some make up and take you over to wardrobe. After you were ready, you headed to the set and took a seat in the corner to watch the scene they were filming. Damien was speaking to a ghost played by Tommy, helping them understand that he has options in the afterlife. Amanda came over after they cut and asked if you were ready. You oddly weren't, your nerves were high but you shook out your hands and planned to fake it til you make it. She led you to the scene in the lobby of the bed and breakfast Damien's character, Gideon, owned. You stepped to your marker and looked to Damien, who was reading the script once before the scene and you smiled to yourself, thinking about how cute his thinking face was. You shook out your hands again, you needed to shake any thoughts like those away.
"Ok" Amanda starts "Damien, Gideon is prepping for two arrivals he has today, both are high school acquaintances in town for your friend Aprils wedding. You are feeling uncomfortable, knowing you will have to make a lot of small talk and feel a need to be more entertaining than with any standard guests" she said, nodding but speaking again before he can talk at all. "Y/N, Gwen is nervous about being back in town. Not only is she having feelings about her close friend getting married and starting 'the rest of her life' " the ending she added finger quotes "but Gwen is also feeling inadequate, not being as advanced in her career as she thought she'd be by now, knowing she'll have tons of people asking about it all weekend." I nod to her "I don't want to give too many notes upfront, lets just vibe" she said and you chuckled. That is so like her.
"Action" she said before taking a seat. You begin walking up to Damien, a smile appearing on his face, it looked so genuine. "Hi, I'm uh checking in under Henry, Gwen Henry" as you reached the counter. "I know exactly who you are" he responded. "I'm Gideon, we had 11th grade history together" he spoke, checking you in. "Of course! Gideon, wow, you look great man. I didn't know you worked here" you could feel your nerves leaving as the conversation, while in character, felt so comfortable. "Yeah, I have been running the place for a few years now. Want me to help you with you bags? I can show you to your room" The two of you walk off scene together before it cuts. You ran the scene a few more times, taking notes as you went. Your characters filmed a bit more together, discussing the upcoming wedding. "Do you need a ride to the wedding? Damien asked you, as you sat at the kitchen table the next morning. "I am going alone so I would be happy to drive you" he added. The first time is character is meant to outright flirt with you. "Unless you have a plus one" his character sits across from you and you look up. "I do not" you smirk, as Amanda had instructed "I would love a ride" you went back to looking at your phone but the smile stayed. "Alright folks, that's a wrap!" Amanda yelled and people began bustling around again. She jumped on set and put her arm around around you "you guys did great today" she pulled you in closer "thank you for doing this" she added and you grinned "literally anything for you, and I didn't even have to dye my hair" you joked "Isn't he the best for that?" Amanda asked "It seems like it" you said before her added in "I really am" with a joking shrug. "
The next morning was filming day two of three, and you had a later call time, the morning being a lot of Damien filming with his ghosty friends. By the time you got to set, things were in full swing, but you had a lot to do to get ready. Your scenes were around attending the wedding of your characters friends. Which meant your make up and hair were done up and you were going to be in a nicer dress. Trina got you in the chair quickly, and she did great work. You needed to take some notes because you loved the way she did your make up. Next was finding the right dress. Amanda had the team bring in a few options to find what would be best. When you tried on the first one, you were instantly relieved that there were more options because this was not it. The dress was too tight in the worst ways. The second dress however fit you like a glove.
You were nervous enough about what you had to film today, you didn't want to also have to worry about how you looked. When you stepped back out to the main set area you were greeted by Amanda's grin "giiiiiiirl" she shook her head "If I wasn't married, I'd be the one falling in love with you today" she made you laugh, it was nice to feel all dolled up even though it was only for a few scenes. The bigger issue was the scene after that. Where you and Damien's character end up in bed together at the inn.
No big deal, just awkwardly laying in bed together, staring into each others eyes, with cameras, cast, and crew all staring at you. Totally fine. "Are you ready?" She asked, her tone more serious "nervous at all?" she asked. "Me?" you responded "never" you faked a laugh and she nodded, but you know she saw right through that.
You filmed a few scenes. It felt like you had to film the scene of you walking out in your dress, Damien seeing you for the first time, over and over. Notes given everytime about changing the reaction, Amanda wasn't sure if she wanted an immediate connection, or if it would be one sided from the start so you got several take options to use. Then a few scenes at the wedding, where your characters ended up dancing together, both drinking and feeling the weight of all your old acquaintances feigning interest in your lives. Gideon calls you both an uber back to the inn, far to drunk to drive. The scene cuts to Gideon helping Gwen to her room. The both of you stumbling and laughing, making jokes about the music and the speeches , but when you reach the room the mood shifts. That shift was hard to capture, filming over and over a small but crucial scene.
"Oh, Gideon..could you help with my dress?" your character says, Damien's face heating up at each take. If you didn't know better you'd think part of it wasn't acting. As his character helps, he sits down on the bed, listening to Gwen continue a story as she changed in her bathroom, door open but just out of view. That is when she climbs into the bed with him, both talking and becoming more comfortable. Only taking two takes to get that just right, natural as could be. It was the next scene, the final scene that caused issue.
Gideon and Gwen lay back on the bed, laughing about the way an old school mate said the word "wildest" in his speech, he'd spent the summer in London and now thinks he has an accent. As your laughing slows, you look at each other. Your characters seeing each other in a new way, but you and Damien could not stop giggling. Ruining the scene each take.
"You guys are KILLING me" Amanda says, giggling herself. "Ok, here is the deal. This scene is everything.. it has to be right. We have a few more scenes to get tomorrow so lets try this again then ok?" she sighs. "In the meantime, I need you two to find a way to get...better?" she said with a shrug "I need you two to look at each other like everything shifted, like your friendship is ending and a relationship is beginning. I don't care if you lay in this bed all night figuring it out...but please figure it out" she walked off and you and Damien looked at eachother as the crew starts to wrap set. "Yikes" he said, breaking the silence. "I'm so sorry" you start in but he cuts you off "hey it is both of us, it is an awkward scene" he lets out a bit of air "Maybe we should actually practice" he suggests and you raise an eyebrow
"Why Damien Haas, are you trying to get me in bed?" you ask with a smirk "Maybe" he smirked back and you and while you started it, it made your cheeks heat up. "We can order in at my place and get more comfortable?" he said, losing the edge to his voice and becoming more sincere.
"That does sound like a good idea" you admit. "I guess we haven't really hung out before, so it would be nice to just shake off the nerves and be more comfortable" you said honestly. "Anything I can pick up on the way to your place?" You ask but he shook his head "no, let me shoot you over my address and we can meet there" you hand him your phone and say goodbye to a few people before taking off and driving to his house. The nerds really hit when you walked up to Damien's door. Were you really here to...lay in bed with a cute boy? This can not be real life.
You knock on the door and hear him shuffle a bit before answering. "Hey!" he said, you could tell he was out of breath. "Sorry was just uh picking up a little" he said, gesturing for you to come in. His place looked so nice. You smiled, turning to face him "This place is very you, I like you" you said and he smiled in return "I tried to make it feel like home" he started walking to the kitchen and you followed behind him. "I thought Italian food would be a good option, so I got a few things from my favorite spot".
"I'm not picky" you smiled and watched him as he made you a plate, setting it at the table. "What can I get you to drink? I have sodas, water, tea" he looked in a cabinet next to him "Oh! I don't drink much but I have a bottle of wine we could crack open" he said, pulling out a bottle. "You know, a glass of wine sounds perfect right now" you chuckled. "You are not wrong, take the edge off" he nodded. "What, you don't often invite women over to lay in your bed and stare at you?" you joked at him
"Oh no, this s a weekly occurrence for me" he joked back. He was always quick with a joke, and you liked playing off of him. You followed him to the table, sitting down "Well now I don't feel special at all" you hold back a laugh.
You both talk, getting to know each other over dinner. You found out you had a lot in common, especially around gaming. You learned he even voiced a character or two that you liked and that was a shocking revelation. "Ok" he says, after cleaning up our plates. "I think we dive right into this. Find a way to be more comfortable with ease" he weighs in "we could like...cuddle on the couch?" he shakes his head "this is so awkward" he covers his face with his hand. You start in, hoping to ease his tension "No no, you're right." you give him a small smile "this IS awkward, don't feel bad" you both are quite for a moment "Cuddle on the couch and watch an episode of TV or something? Let us get get over the awkwardness. Pretend this is a casual date night or something" he nods "we are both actors, we can do that" he says with confidence.
You were trying to contain your feelings as he sat next to you on the sofa, turning on netflix and finding a baking show to watch. That was sweet of him since you said that was your go to type of show. "Is it ok if I put my arm around you?" he asks, not taking his eyes off the screen. "That would be ok" you glance at him. When he placed his arm around your shoulders you instinctively leaned him closer. Your heart picked up as his hand nervously laid against you. You held in your breathing slightly, afraid to move too much, wanting to just take in the moment you are in. You watched the show for several minutes like this, quite but comfortable. "I wish I could bake like this" you said, breaking the silence. "Me too" he said adjusting his arm slightly and gently rubbing his thumb against your arm. You got goosebumps very lightly, hoping he hadn't noticed. You adjust slightly and lay your head against his shoulder, allowing for a slight escalation.
In turn, Damien pulled you in a little closer and for a moment you forgot why you were here. "This is...comfortable" he said eventually and you nodded "Yeah, it is" he could not see your smile, but it was there. "Not nearly as awkward as I thought" you added and he chuckled "Oh you thought cuddling with me would be awkward? Should I be offended?" he said playfully. "or should I be happy you imagined cuddling with me at all?" he kept a playful tone but the comment made your cheeks warm. "I guess there are worse people I could have as a romantic counterpart" you joke back. "I'll take that as a compliment" he said, his thumb moving up and down your arm at a slower pace, your body acutely aware.
"We've proven we can cuddle." you say, not sure how to really say that you want to try laying down now. you feel his head nod and you move to sitting back up. "Do you want to...move to my room?" he said now looking at you. "I think so" you said, realizing how close you two still sat. "Do you..maybe want to talk expectations?" he said a bit quieter than his normal voice. "Cuddling on the couch is one thing I uh-" he stammered a bit "I want to make sure you are comfortable and that I don't overstep here" you bit your lip slightly and his eyes moved to stare but quickly came back to your eyes "Yeah" you try to say confidently "Um, the scene does call for a few things, maybe we could practice all of that.." he trail off, knowing that means a kiss.
"Ok" his smile clear "Lets just practice the scene and stop if we feel too weird. Maybe that is easiest? Lets just be Gideon and Gwen?" he suggests and you felt your shoulders actually relax a bit. "I like that Idea" you add in, starting to stand up. "well, are you going to walk me to my room?" you said in a more confident voice that you use for Gwen. Damien stood up, grabbing your hand and leading you to his room. Your heart pounding in your chest. You couldn't believe the way you were able to continue this exercise without squealing. You reached Damien's room and looked around. He had dark bedding, and low lighting. It was much like you expected it to be but very clean and still inviting in a way.
He sat on his bed, patting next to him. "So, we both are sitting here" he said as you made your way over, sitting next to him. "Laughing about the world wildly" you add and he leaned back, you followed. This time, you turned to look at him and he looked at you. This time, there was no giggling, you both stared for a moment or two before you cracked a smile. "Look at us" he said sitting back up, that had to be 5-6 seconds right? he joked. You sat back up too "Better than before right? This is more comfortable already" you tried to shake out your hands and he watched in amusement. "Am I making you nervous" he said, a hint of joking but more a sense of intimacy in his question. He actually worried that something he was doing was uncomfortable and you shook your head no at first but stopped. "I think It was more nerve racking to do all of this with you in front of everyone, judging our movements, giving us notes, you know?" he nodded, you could tell that just saying it gave him some relief. "I was thinking the same thing" he admitted "I don't want to come off as a weirdo but it felt wrong to potentially kiss you for the first time in front of all those people and immediately receive notes on it." he chuckled slightly. "not really how I imagined it" you said, not thinking about the implications of that statement. "So you imagined it huh? He said leaning into the playfulness. You wanted to backtrack, to say something about it being in the script.
Instead you played off his attitude "what if I have?" you bit your bottom lip and you saw the shift in his face, the corner of his mouth turning upwards and he cocked his head to the side. "Well now you have to share with the class. What exactly did you imagine it being like?" the way his spoke made you take a sharp breath. You leaned in closer to him "to start, there were a lot less people" you say in a low voice. Damien matched your energy leaning in, you two sitting on the bed closely "there are less people here now" he watched your eyes, waiting for any kind of invitation "and yet you still haven't kissed me" you felt his hand on your face before the words left your mouth. "I've also thought about what it would be like to kiss you" his voice low as he inched closer. You closed your eyes, waiting for his lips to meet yours. It was soft at first, testing the waters. You pushed harder against his mouth and you felt him envelop you. His hand now in your hair and his body beginning to press against yours. You fall back on the bed and follows, hovering above you as he gently pulls back.
You look up and him and smile "I think we will be just fine tomorrow" he says, before kissing you again.
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bonesxbows · 8 months ago
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Surgery of a Hope (Astarion x Reader)
My Masterlist
Someone dared to try to lay a hand on you and Astarion finds out. He leaves Gale to comfort you while he goes and "takes care" of it. Or alternatively, Astarion is trying to show you he loves you in one of the only ways he knows how; by killing.
(WARNINGS) - mentions of sexual assault/assault (depending on how you look at it), but does not go into a lot of detail - crying/breakdown - trauma responses
If you have any triggers relating to assault or past assault please be careful reading this. I have not personally experienced what is written here but it is loosely based on trauma of my own and the goal was to write something to act as a comfort for myself and whoever else needs to read something like this. But please tread carefully, I didn't write this with the intent of triggering anyone.
Otherwise, I hope you enjoy and I hope reading this can help someone else like writing it helped me :) Comments and reblogs are much appreciated!
Banners by @strangergraphics
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You sat on the ground inside your tent, nestled in the corner of the fabric, your knees pulled up to your chest. You were slowly rocking back and forth, replaying the traumatic events of the day in your head. Your body was present, but your mind was lost in its own little world, your eyes glassed over. You didn't notice Astarion barge into your tent, a bubble of excitement coming with him.
“Darling! I've been waiting all day to have a moment with you all to myself. I-” His sentence and his body stopped dead in their tracks when his eyes finally found you, a sad little ball of limbs shoved into the corner. His voice startled you out of your daze. He walked closer towards you and reached out a hand, but you jumped in response to him approaching and shuffled yourself deeper into the corner, as far away from him as you possibly could get. He frowned. He recognized your fear, he remembered acting like you were doing now once before and that worried him.
“Astarion, wait. I…wait. Please, don't come any closer.” You spilled out your words quickly. Your eyes were glued to his outstretched hand, wide like a gnoll staring down a wall of fire, and tears started to pool underneath them.
“What’s wrong my love?” He hated when you cried. He was getting better at learning how to comfort you but he still got nervous about making it worse. His frown deepened but he respected your request and instead knelt down where he was, keeping his distance from you.
“I…um…” you stumbled over your words, your mouth becoming dry and thick, like someone had shoved cotton down your throat. You tried to blink away the tears but they were now two hot waterfalls running down your face.
“It’s alright, you can tell me. What happened?” You looked like a scared animal and it reminded him too much of how he used to feel. He was concerned, but he was also angry. He had a feeling he already knew what had happened to you and the thought of him being right made him burn with rage inside. You took a shaky breath and did your best to speak coherently.
“Someone…um, someone tried to touch me earlier when we were in town. I…I tried to stop them, tried to fight them off. Some things were said and…and…” Your story ended there as the sobs racked your body aggressively. You buried your head in your arms, wrapping your hands around your shoulder to try to comfort yourself as you rocked back and forth, crying and screaming and sobbing loudly. Astarion swore he could feel his undead heart shatter. He could do nothing but sit there and watch as you poured out your emotions. He knew from experience that if he tried to comfort you it would only make the situation worse, but he felt helpless just sitting there and doing nothing. So he reached over and yanked your blanket off of your cot, folding it up haphazardly and placing it between the two of you, nudging your foot with the fabric, doing his best not to touch you.
You poked your head up slightly, eyeing him. You saw the blanket, your blanket, and how Astarion sat back on his heels, a comforting smile on his face. You unfurled a hand from your cocoon of limbs and reached forward slowly, grabbing the blanket tentatively, as if even the soft material would snap back at you as well. But it didn't, so you pulled it into your lap on top of your knees and buried your head into the comfort of it, sniffing the familiar scent of Astarion’s cologne that had rubbed off on it from his constant nights spent in your tent with you. You used a corner of it to wipe away your tears and tried to focus on steadying your breathing. You mouthed a ‘thank you’ to Astarion and he nodded his head.
“Do you think you can manage to remember who it was, my love? Can you tell me what they looked like?” he asked you softly. He wanted to reach out and grab your hand in his, but he stayed still for now. He would not touch you until you were ready and asked him to, no matter how much he wanted to. You began to shake your head furiously.
“No. Astarion, no. It was nothing, really. You don't need to do anything. It was my fault anywa-” He cut you off before you could finish your sentence.
“Do not even finish that statement darling. None of this is your fault. None of it. Do you understand? Now, what did they look like?” his face was like stone, serious and deadly. It didn't scare you, not anymore at least, but you knew trying to argue with him at this point was futile. You were so confused and upset you did not know what the right thing to do was so you trusted Astarion and told him everything you could remember. You watched as he took off his jacket and moved closer to you. But he stopped just before he got too close.
“Is it alright if I touch you my sweet?” He asked before he did anything and you nodded, although slowly. He leaned forward to drape his jacket over your shoulders and pull it up over your neck. Your fingers fumbled at first but you grabbed it and pulled it as close to your skin as you could, relishing in the warmth and comfort radiating off of the velvet fabric.
“Stay here, alright? I’ll tell Gale to accompany you here inside of your tent so you don't have to be alone. I promise I’ll be back before morning.” He leaned forward again to kiss you gently on your forehead and you didn't jerk away this time. He smiled warmly at you but his ruby eyes shone with anger and malice. He began to stand up and head for the entry flap of your tent.
“Wait! Where are you going?” You jumped from surprise and began to reach for him but stopped abruptly when his jacket began to fall off of your shoulders and instead quickly grabbed it again and pulled it back up around you. You were afraid to be alone, even with Gale. You only felt safe around Astarion. Your sense of security was so shattered you were hesitant to trust anyone except him. He turned back around before he left.
“Promise me you'll stay here with Gale.” no, you wanted to go with him, wherever he was going. You wanted his warmth and to be in his arms with him by your side protecting you, no one else.
“But I-” he cut you off again. He was not looking for any arguments tonight.
“Promise me, my love.” there was no arguing with the look in his eyes and there was no changing his mind about whatever he had set his mind on doing. “I promise.” you choked out, trying not to cry again at the thought of him leaving you right now.
“Good. I’ll be back as soon as I can alright? Then I’ll stay with you for as long as you need.” You watched him leave, trying to blink away the tears that threatened to flow. You gripped his jacket even tighter and breathed in the smell of his cologne again, it was an even stronger scent on his jacket than on your blanket. A few moments after Astarion left Gale walked in, smiling sympathetically. He somehow juggled a bowl, two mugs, and a stack of books in his hands without dropping anything.
“How are you feeling?” he asked. You didn't give an answer and watched as he sat where Astarion once was just a minute ago and placed all of the things in his hands in front of him, between the two of you.
“We don't have to talk if you'd rather not. But I thought you might like a distraction while Astarion is away. My time is yours.” You looked at him and he looked sincere, but you were still a little wary. But this was Gale, someone who had stuck by your side from the very beginning and had been nothing but respectful and helpful ever since. You gazed over what he had brought with him, there was what appeared to be stew in the bowl and the two mugs were filled with tea and still steaming. The books were ones you recognized, titles you had once borrowed from him and had told him you had enjoyed immensely. Books that you knew, that were familiar, and there was comfort in familiarity. He knew this. Gale was your best friend, he was the second person to know just about everything about you. You were grateful that his memory was impeccable and that he had remembered all of your favorite things, especially at a time like now.
“What kind of soup is that?” you asked. The tears had subsided, for now. He was glad you were up to talking, it was going to be a long night for him if he had to sit here in silence the whole time.
“Vegetable and sausage. And that’s peppermint tea, with sugar, just how you like it. I've also brought your favorite books, but I can fetch something else if reading isn't up to your liking currently.” He stole a pillow from the pile off of your bed and propped himself up against the side of your tent, still an agreeable distance away from you. Astarion must have given him the details of your jumpiness and sensitivity to touch right now. You couldn't help but smile just a little.
“The books are alright for now, Gale. Thank you.” You reached forward for one of the mugs and chose one of the books from the stack as you did so.
“Of course. Let me know if you need anything else, alright? Im not going anywhere until Astarion gets back.” you nodded and took a sip from the mug, the tea warming your scratchy throat on the way down. You opened the book to the first page and Gale did the same with his own book.
Eventually the warm tea, familiar story, and comfort of Astarion’s scent lulled you into a sleep. Your body was exhausted from the day’s events and the extensive crying you had done earlier. Gale had stayed with you the entire night, within arms reach just in case you needed him, even when the rough ground began to irritate his old human body. He had even lit the candles in your tent after the sun had set just so you would not be in complete darkness if you woke up in the middle of the night.
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You were never a heavy sleeper, but now you were even more anxious in your sleep after what had happened. A dull thud had woken you up and you heard the sound of water splashing. Your eyes fluttered open quickly but your heart calmed down when you saw the back of a familiar white shirt and white curls in the candlelight. Astarion had returned at some point, before morning just like he had promised, but his back was turned to you and he was knelt in front of your washing bucket.
“Astarion? Is that you?” you asked groggily. Your voice was thick with sleep but you were wide awake, grateful that he was back already.
“Go back to sleep darling, it’s alright.” he spoke sweetly to you like always, but he stayed with his back to you, working something onto the wash board inside the tub.
“Where have you been?” you sat up, blinking away the remaining sleep in your eyes and trying to focus on what he was doing. A part of you already had a guess of where he had been for the last few hours but you asked anyway, not wanting to believe what you knew was already true.
“No where you need to worry your pretty little head about, everything’s alright.” he told you, but you were too curious now to go back to sleep. Astarion hated chores, yet here he was scrubbing laundry in the middle of the night. You stood up quietly and padded over to him, still holding onto his jacket around your shoulders. You leaned over his shoulder and observed. He was holding on to a different white shirt than the one on his back currently, scrubbing furiously as the soapy water turned pink. Now that you were closer you also noticed the way the candlelight shined against black spots in his hair, a stark difference against his bleach white curls. You frowned slightly, accepting your previous conclusion as the truth now.
“Is that blood?” you asked. You already knew the answer but you wanted to hear it from him.
“No.” he tried to deny the obvious, though he already knew you wouldn't believe the white lie.
“Astarion.” you said sternly, gently warning him to tell you the truth this time.
“Alright maybe it is. But the bastard deserved it.” he stopped scrubbing and so you sat down on the ground behind him. He turned to look at you, abandoning the shirt in the dirty water.
“What did you do?” your voice was calm. You didn't mind he had taken matters into his own hands, in fact you were secretly grateful.
“I taught him a much needed lesson my love. He won’t be hurting anyone ever again.” his lips turned up into his signature killer smile. He was proud of himself for the kill, as per usual. You wanted to thank him, say something, anything, to convey how relieved you felt, but the words got caught in your throat. His smile faltered a little when he noticed the pool of tears forming in your eyes, but he knew you were okay from the small smile that was stuck on your face.
He dunked his hands back into the water to wash the rest of the blood off and then dried them on his pants before outstretching a hand to you, silently asking for yours. You obliged, placing your hand in his. He brought it up to his face and placed a gentle kiss on your knuckle. You couldn't help the small laugh that bubbled up from his gesture, the smile on your face growing despite the tears that started to flood your face. You were safe. Even after all that had happened, you were safe with Astarion.
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siriuslywicked · 2 months ago
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Tangled Hearts - Chapter One
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Pairing: poly!wolfstar x reader
Summary: After years of isolating yourself from old school friends, you find yourself thrown back into their world after an invitation from Lily to celebrate her and James' recent engagement. As you, Sirius, and Remus reconnect, it becomes clear the chemistry between the three of you is as vibrant as it was at Hogwarts. Having been burned before, are you willing to let yourself trust them again?
Tags: drinking, no use of y/n, reader is nicknamed "fluffs," ignoring actual timelines and canon for storytelling reasons, reader is half blood, hidden relationships, wolfstar are closeted babies, ignoring peter bc he gives me the ick, reader is afab, reader wears makeup and can put her hair up
A/N: I am so so excited to be posting this fic. I don't think I've published anything since like 2017, but it has been really fun getting back into writing. I'm open to friendly feedback, ideas for the main story or any extras! I have a couple short extras I might write but please send me your thoughts and ideas! Enjoy!
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You weren’t a stranger to walking home alone on the cold, dark streets of London. Working a demanding Ministry job meant you often left work late. Due to the short distance home you often opted to travel on foot, preferring it to more magical methods of transport. While not unusual, this particular walk left you in low spirits. It was five past seven on a crisp Friday evening, and as the city bustled with life around you, a feeling of loneliness seated itself in your chest at the idea of returning to your empty apartment. 
In the few years since you had left Hogwarts, the state of the Wizarding world—your world—had steadily grown darker. Coming from a half-Muggle, half-wizard household had always left you in a precarious position. You were grateful for your stable position at the Ministry, working in the Muggle Relations Office, it provided a small sense of security. That was one of the things you missed most about being at Hogwarts: the stability. When you were inside the castle walls, it had felt like nothing could harm you. You would always be warm, fed, and surrounded by good company. You often found yourself longing to be back in the Gryffindor common room with your friends, talking late into the night around the fire.
The common room had been replaced by your cozy little flat in London where you lived alone. It was small and in need of renovations, but had unique charms and a homey feel. Your friends had been replaced by a few coworkers who you met occasionally for drinks at the Leaky Cauldron. The sense of security, belonging really,  had been replaced by a near-constant unease and loneliness that seemed to follow you around like a shadow. Occasionally, you’d receive an owl from Lily, updating you on her life with James. They were recently engaged, and you couldn’t be happier for them. You and Lily had been fast friends at Hogwarts. Your mixed magical and Muggle family meant you could understand her, and help her adjust to life at Hogwarts. After being sorted into the same house, the two of you had been inseparable for years, only drifting apart slightly when Lily and James grew closer. Sharing Lily’s attention had been an adjustment, but it had come with a larger friend group, as Lily and James had quickly welcomed you into their circle, introducing you to Sirius and Remus. The five of you had spent your seventh year causing quite the ruckus. Between parties, weekend trips to Hogsmeade, and sneaking through the castle’s many hidden passageways, you had never had a better time at Hogwarts.
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Walking up the red brick steps to your flat, you shook yourself free of thoughts of the past and focused on the evening ahead. Unlocking the door with a discreet flick of your wand, you stepped inside and took in the warmth of your small home. Sitting on the kitchen counter was Lily’s most recent letter, informing you of her engagement. With it, she had sent a picture of herself and James, both smiling and waving up at you. Holding the photograph in one hand, you contemplated the contents of the letter. The happy couple would be in London in a couple of hours to grab a pint and celebrate with Sirius and Remus. You had been invited to join, of course, but you found yourself hesitant.
As close as your group had been during seventh year, there was an unmistakable shift in dynamic as Lily and James became closer. It had left you, Remus, and Sirius to your own devices. The three of you had always enjoyed teasing one another, conversations always full of quick wit and laughter. But like so many good friendships, you had gotten too close and ended up burned. Turns out Remus and Sirius didn’t really want to turn their duo into a trio. Outside of a couple of dinners at Lily and James’s, you hadn’t spent any time with the two boys. In fact, now that you thought about it, more than a year had passed since you’d seen any of the old group, aside from Lily. 
As much as the idea of seeing everyone again after so long made you nervous, you knew how important it was to Lily that you made an appearance. For this reason, you found yourself shrugging off your heavy cloak and padding into the bedroom to change. After changing into a burgundy cardigan and your favorite jeans, you fixed your makeup and messy updo with a flick of your wand. Throwing on an overcoat, you prepared yourself to brave the night once again, feeling the familiar flare of anxiety pool in your stomach. It was just a couple of drinks with old friends—what could be so bad about that?
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Trudging along the castle halls back to Gryffindor after a long week of classes hadn’t been easy. You had felt weighed down by exhaustion, impatiently awaiting the moment you could curl up under your covers and say goodbye to the stress of pre-Christmas exams, if only for a few hours. Arriving back at the common room, you found it unusually quiet. Unlike most of Gryffindor House, you had spent the last Friday evening before end-of-term exams in the library, pouring over notes and trying desperately to recall Professor Binns’s most recent lecture. You assumed the younger students were asleep in their dorms, while the older students—your friends included—were almost certainly at the little bash Hufflepuff was throwing to try and outdo the Gryffindor party that would be taking place the following weekend. An impossible feat, but don’t tell that to any of the Puffs.
Climbing the stairs to your dorm, you recalled that you had lent your copy of Advanced Potion Making to Remus, and you would need it to continue studying in the morning. The chances of getting the book back before noon tomorrow seemed slim, so you opted to sneak into the boys’ dorm and fetch it before crashing. No one would be in right now, and it wasn’t like you and Lily hadn’t been in their dorms before. Quickly changing course, you found yourself in front of the boys’ dormitory and cast a quick charm to unlock the door. Slowly stepping inside, you began searching for the textbook near Remus’s things. Taking in the room, you noticed that the curtains around Sirius’s four poster had been drawn completely closed. Odd for a messy dorm. Surely Sirius hadn’t brought a girl back so early in the night—it was only half-past ten. You flushed at the thought and felt your heart rate increase at the idea that he might be behind the curtain with some girl from the party. Sirius was good-looking, no doubt about it, but you wouldn’t reduce yourself to being jealous of whoever his conquest of the night was. You silently thanked the heavens for the existence of silencing charms and hurried your search.
It only took a moment longer for you to spot the potions book among some of Remus’s school clothes. You quickly grabbed the book and made your way to the door, but before you could grab the handle, you heard a great thump and the unmistakable sound of Sirius groaning in pain. Turning to look, you saw Sirius on his back, looking rather disheveled—his curly black locks untidy, cheeks flushed, and the majority of the buttons on his shirt undone. But instead of seeing some sixth-year Hufflepuff girl on top of him, you saw... “Remus?”
“Hello, Fluffs,” he said breathlessly, looking rather sheepish. If you thought Sirius looked flushed, it was nothing compared to the pink staining Remus’s cheeks—not that you were any better off.
“I was just coming to fetch my book… I thought you’d both be off at the party with the others—sorry.” The explanation came out squeaky as you clutched the book to your chest. Both boys stared at you, rooted to the spot, all three of you seemingly at a loss for words. Remus seemed to catch up with himself first, he extracted himself from his position between Sirius’s legs and stood quickly on wobbling legs. His mouth opened and closed a couple of times, struggling with how to proceed. 
“The others don’t know. You wouldn’t mind keeping this between the three of us, would you?”
Glancing between his nervous expression and the still red Sirius on the floor, you nodded slowly and took a step back towards the door.
“My lips are sealed. Promise.” You gave a small smile, still blushing, and quickly exited the room.
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A short walk later, you found yourself standing outside the small pub Lily had mentioned in her letter. You felt anxiety settle in the pit of your stomach as you looked down at your watch: eight twenty. You were early—perhaps you would get lucky, and it would just be Lily and James there. Sirius and Remus tended to be just beyond fashionably late. Keeping that thought in mind, you took a deep breath and opened the door.
The pub was dimly lit, and the air was thick with smoke. The bar was full of Muggle patrons watching whatever match happened to be on. Along one wall was a series of round cushioned booths, each outfitted with its own oil lamp and ashtray. Taking in the scene, you spotted two familiar faces. To your great surprise, Sirius and Remus could be seen sitting in one of the booths. Sirius noticed you first, a large grin spreading across his face as his pale eyes met yours. Despite the hammering in your chest, you felt yourself smiling back as your feet carried you towards their booth. Sirius looked as ever—his curly dark hair pulled into a loose bun, his cream button-down hugging his broadened shoulders. Remus gave you a soft smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, and as you got closer, he ran a nervous hand through his hair.
“Well, if it isn’t our favorite Fluffs!” Sirius grinned.
He stood and pulled you into an embrace as you reached the booth. Standing on your toes and throwing your arms around his neck in return felt as natural as coming home. His cologne smelled of spice and something woodsy, and it stuck to you as you stepped down and went to take a seat next to Remus.
You weren’t sure what you had been expecting seeing just the two of them again after all this time, but the enthusiastic welcome from Sirius had been enough to settle your nerves. 
“Still calling me Fluffs? I was really hoping that after all these years, the two of you would let me live that down.”
“Don’t be silly, dove,” Remus said with a smirk. “That nickname is going to stick around as long as Pads does.”
You let out a small huff at Remus’s comment. It came as a relief that he felt comfortable enough to tease you alongside Sirius, even if he had seemed apprehensive seeing you again. You relaxed further into the booth as Sirius sat down on Remus’s other side.
“I must say, I’m surprised to see you here before Lily and James. Since when were you two so punctual?”
Sirius smiled into his pint as Remus explained, “We’ve got a flat nearby. Prongs asked us to save a booth.”
Rather than linger on the fact they were living together—and what that implied—you leaned across Remus and asked Sirius if he would fetch you a drink. He obliged with a grin and quickly made his way to the bar.
“It’s good to see you again, love,” Remus said, turning toward you. As you took him in, all deep eyes and silky light-brown hair, you felt yourself flush once again. While Sirius had always brought out the bubbly side of you with his exuberant energy, Remus often gave you butterflies with just a look. Despite the years that had passed, it was clear the pair still affected you like you were seventeen.
No sooner had Sirius returned bearing your drink of choice—because of course he remembered—than the happy couple materialized at the booth. After warm greetings all around, the five of you settled into comfortable conversation with drinks all around. 
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It was the first time since Hogwarts that the five of you had had so much fun. A great deal of catching up had been in order, Lily and James gushing over the engagement and wedding plans, Remus and Sirius about their many London adventures, and you about the happenings at the Muggle Relations Office. 
Lily and James were seated on one side of the booth, and somewhere between round two and three, you had ended up squished between Remus and Sirius on the other.
“Did the boys tell you about their flat?” Lily piped up across the table. “It’s just around the corner. Real nice place too! What with two boys living there and all…” She trailed off with a giggle.
So, if it was common knowledge they were living together, did that mean—
“Ultimate bachelor’s pad if you ask me! They’ve even got Muggle foosball all enchanted. The little players have got a mind of their own at this point,” James chimed in.
Apparently not. 
Not dwelling on the fact Lily and James were still in the dark about certain aspects of their friends' relationship, you quickly downed the rest of your drink. Head feeling fuzzy and cheeks radiating heat, you focused your eyes to look at Lily. She gave you a wide smile before grabbing James’s arm and announcing to the group that it was past her bedtime, prompting the group to finish their drinks as well. You all stood and staggered out onto the street, you yourself stumbling slightly and gripping onto the table to help you stand. After Lily and James had said their goodbyes, Lily giving you a tight hug, Remus and Sirius turned to you.
“How are you planning on getting home, dove? Please don’t tell me you’re thinking of disapparating in this state,” Remus teased, clearly amused at how tipsy you’d gotten after just a few pints.
He had a point. You didn’t have a good way to get home besides walking, but it was rather late for that. The other option was casting a sobering charm on yourself, but that just sounded plain unpleasant. “I hadn’t thought that far ahead. Suppose I could always take the night bus,” you giggled, feeling a little silly for your lack of forethought.
Sirius shook his head before you had even finished your sentence. “Don’t be ridiculous, Fluffs! You can tag along with me and Moony, crash at ours, yeah?”
“Yeah?” you said hesitantly, your eyes darting between the two tall boys. The last thing you wanted was to put them out right after reconnecting had gone so well.
Remus nodded his agreement without hesitation. “Perfect idea, Pads. We’ve got an extra blanket and everything. Don’t you worry, love.”
And so, you found yourself arm-in-arm with Remus and Sirius, walking down the streets of London toward their flat. Correction: street. Lily hadn’t been kidding when she said it was around the corner. During the short walk, you couldn’t help but feel like you were exactly where you ought to be. Something about being back with Remus and Sirius felt so unbelievably right that it made you giddy.
As you rose the steps with Remus’s help, the last drink from the pub hit your system, and you felt yourself lean into him ever so slightly more. Once inside, he laid you down on the couch with the promise of a blanket and a couple of pillows that felt cool on your flushed cheeks. Remus pulled off your boots, and you could hear Sirius talking animatedly to him from what you imagined was the kitchen. You let your eyes slip closed as you settled into the couch, feeling warm and sleepy. The boys' voices became more hushed, and you heard footsteps indicating they were walking toward the couch.
“Dove?” Remus’s soft voice prompted you to peek your eyes open.
“Mmm?”
“Just wanted to say goodnight, darling,” he explained, his hand rubbing soft circles on your arm.
“Night, Moons. Night, Pads,” you murmured, looking at the pair of them and smiling.
“Goodnight, our darling Fluffs,” Sirius replied, smiling brightly.
You let your eyes fall closed once more, drifting off to the sound of hushed whispers and a door closing down the hall.
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zee-143 · 1 year ago
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☆Felix x Black! Reader(Fem! Reader)♡
A/N: Hey black girlies 😍❤ I'm also a black girlie so I've been dying to do this!! Also, if you're not black and wanna read please do!! I don't really care just no hate!!! We need more kpop x black readers frr😭 Btw if u know any people who write them pls tell me! Uhm, one more thing, this is my first time writing like a story kinda one shot thing..? Basically, sorry if it isn't amazing. I'm still learning so pls enjoy ❣️❣️
Genre: Fluff☁💕 but sorta angsty??
Warnings: Nothing ✨
Summery: You're insecure about your curly hair so Felix tried to help you feel better ( and sorta failed)
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You frowned, staring at your reflection in the mirror. It wasn't a pretty sight, you thought. Your hair was so messy and boring. This definitely wasn't how you wanted to start the day with. Especially since you have a date with Felix. Dealing with this mess of hair you couldn't control? Huge bummer. Though with a problem, there's always a solution.
You slid open your vanity drawer, rummaging around all the random hair products and combs. Your face brightened as you pulled out a hair straightener
"Perfect! "
You found a place to plug it in. You turned on the device, unsure of what to do next. You hadn't actually had any experience with straightening your hair. This is the first time but dealing with your stupid curly hair is way harder. What was difficult about straight hair? You shrugged of the feeling of uneasiness.
You placed the straightener near your hair. You hesitated slightly, placing the curly ends of your hair in between the tool. You worried that it would burn your hair or something. You've seen plenty girls on social media though doing it for real is nerve wrecking.
You press the straightener down onto your hair, leaving it for a few seconds before satisfyingly pulling it away. You were astonished to find how well it worked out! Your hair was straight and some how not burned. Eagerness and excitement took over your whole body. You pulled the hair straightener back to try another piece of hair
"Sunshine~ Are you almost rea-"
Felix stopped mid sentence, standing frozen at the doorway. You hadn't noticed him at all as you successfully straitened more bunches of hair. Felix moved so quickly, you couldn't react to how he carefully snatched the hair tool away. He unplugged then placed it on your vanity table.
You stared at him, a look of surprise. Felix stared back at you, instead with eyes of worry. A loud silence echoed around the room. You wanted to say something, but what? That you didn't know
"I like your hair"
Felix stated. You cocked an eyebrow, unsure of what he was on about. Felix noticed this so he continues
"You don't have to straighten it, is all I'm saying. You have a beautiful hair texture"
Felix shrugged, staring at you. His face had a sense of calmness but you could tell he wanted to say more.
"There's nothing special about it. It's honestly boring and difficult to manage"
You respond in a monotone voice. Felix couldn't tell whether you were just saying that or you were serious. He crossed his arms and hummed in thought
"Well... "
Felix pulled you into his chest, holding you in a tight hug
"That doesn't mean you should change it. You've never straightened it before. I don't get it... "
You listened to the concern in his voice. It hurt you to make him feel this way. Felix hates it when you change something about yourself. He'd rather get stabbed a billion times than not have the real you.
"It's complicated" You answer
"Then explain it to me"
Felix wasn't backing down any time soon. He needed to know what you hated so much about your hair. You may think he doesn't know, but he knows. He knows how you wish your hair was straight. He knows how you wish you didn't have to deal with such a 'messy' hair type. Felix knew everything and it hurt him every time you said something bad about yourself. Sure, Felix isn't in your position, so he'd never know why you feel this way. He wanted to know though. Every little detail.
"We're gonna be late for our date, you know?" You didn't know what else to say
"I don't care. We're not going anymore"
Felix pulled away. He held your hands tightly and scanned your face. You were about to question it but he stopped you
"We're not going anywhere until you tell me what's wrong with your hair. And don't use those lame excuses. Be honest with me... "
"I dunno"
"You can't not know. Are you insecure about your hair or something? "
Silence filled the room. For the first time, you didn't have an answer. You didn't say anything. It was weird. Imagine being insecure about your hair?
"No"
You lied. Felix sighed. He knows you're not telling the truth.
"Fine...but 𝘐 like your hair, alright? I think.. I think it's so unique and special. There's only so much I can do with mine. Yours has so many possibilities. I love it just like I love you"
Felix kissed your forehead. His hands let go of yours. You stared blankly at him, unable to form a proper sentence. His words were so simple. This touched your heart though.
Felix strolled away from you, stepping out the door. He gave you a quick smile before leaving and closing the door behind him. You wanted to tell him to come back. You decided against it.
Staring at your reflection in the vanity mirror had you realize something. Your hair was yours and there was nothing hair products or even a straightener could fix. You still hated that. You knew Felix only cares about you. He worries too much, you thought. You picked up the hair straightener again, plugging it in. Your reflection seemed to be mocking you. You ignored it. It was all your decision. What more can an insecure black girl do?
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Please tell me what you think!!
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warping-realities · 8 months ago
Text
Building an Empire Part I
Okay, I know I said I didn't plan on writing anything new, but it seems that just by making the new images for Making
Amends the desire to try something new appeared. In reality, it's not that new because I'm not writing anything different from what I've written before and even the way the transformation occurs is derived from another story, albeit with some twists. And yes, as the title makes clear we are talking about a series, but I have no idea when the next part will be ready. Finally, this one is a little darker than my usual, so be warned. Hope you like it!
The Partner
Javier stared at the prison cell wall with hatred so deep in his eyes that it could burn a hole in the concrete in front of him. He had been very stupid to let himself get caught in something as stupid as tax evasion. The police had been looking for years for a reason to place him in that exact place without ever having come close to him engaging in any of the criminal activities that formed the basis of the small fortune acquired through his life of crime. At almost forty years of age he had acquired a reputation in the criminal underworld, several gangs and cartels hired his services with the guarantee of a quick and effective solution to any possible problem. An arrest would irreparably tarnish that reputation. And in his field, a man's reputation was his greatest asset, even more so when he had another reputation, that of an insatiable man-eater, who had only gotten away with his actions and the blatant homophobia in his midst due to his impeccable record. In fact, if a look could tear down a wall, Javier's cell would have been open to the outside world for a long time.
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….
"Javier Ruiz, suspect in several cases of extortion, drug trafficking and possible involvement in homicides that have never been clarified. Raised by his maternal great-aunt Isabela Ruiz, his father was a member of a cartel killed in an exchange of gunfire with a rival gang before his birth and his heroin-addicted mother died with him in her arms at the age of 3 in the small apartment where they lived, where he would be found 4 days after the incident, dehydrated but still resisting.
Since he was a child, he was known for his enormous size, which earned him his nickname, Golias, Goliath, a name he adopted in the criminal underworld. We have had reports of his activities for more than two decades but without ever being able to link the nickname to the person. Until now.
Thanks to a rookie mistake we finally have him in custody, an opportunity. " Explained to the room a young dark haired cop.
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"Indeed, he has precious information, but it seems no one in here is capable to get him to say anything." Police Lieutenant Patrick Walsh spoke in response, with a hard look at his subordinates.
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"An opportunity we just missed. His bail was just paid, he's free." Interjected one of the police officers present, Sergeant Adams, a portly black man in his fifties.
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"Shit, a completely wasted golden opportunity." Exclaimed the young dar haired and fresh out of the academy, Officer Anthony DiAngelo who was present there only because he was the lieutenant's wife's nephew.
"Maybe not. Sir, I have an idea." Said a strong blond man of about 35 years old with a rigid look and posture. And his idea made the lieutenant's eyes shine with excitement.
"Enjoying your freedom while you can Goliath?" asked the blonde detective in front of the police station when Javier was released.
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"My name is Javier. And my taxes and bail have been paid, there's no need to bother me detective...?"
"Fischer. Michael Fischer. And I didn't want to bother you Golias, just warn you."
"Warn me, of what?"
"Unfortunately, it seems that the information that you spent the night at the police station has leaked . The rumor going around the city is that you handed over very important people to save your skin."
"Save me from what, a stupid accusation of tax evasion?"
"Ah, but they don't know that, do they?"
"Son of a bitch!"
"Goliath, this son of a bitch here is your best friend right now."
"I have no friends, let alone a pig like you. And if you think I'm going to fall for that stupid move and turn someone in, you're sorely mistaken."
"Well, I'm sure a lot of people have seen you talking to me in the last few minutes, friend." Detective Fischer concluded as he placed a card in Javier's pocket. While Javier, being in front of the police station, could not react the way he wanted and risk being arrested again.
"For when you realize the value of my friendship, Goliath."
…..
Javier was foaming at the mouth, with the money he had accumulated he knew he could live reasonably well in some forgotten third world country. Still, he needed to take Tia Isabel with him and that would be a big problem. How would he go out the country with an elderly illegal woman with the police and the city's biggest criminals on his tail?
"Fuck, fuck, fuck! You bastards." He shouted at the roof of the car as he headed to the comfortable apartment he had rented for the aunt who had raised him spend the last years of her life.
"Tia sabel, it's Javi, I'm sorry I didn't come to see you yesterday, I had an unforeseen event and we need to talk about... Tia? Tia?" Said Javier, touching the cold corpse of the woman who had created him and feeling a wave of pain, sadness and already the familiar hate and anger invade him."
"They're going to pay, they're going to pay...damn pigs." He said between tears, hugging his aunt's body. And so he continued for a long time. Until a strange buzzing sound caught his attention. Following the source of the sound he came across a shelf full of trinkets. The buzzing came from a small round golden box. He picked it up and felt it vibrate in his huge hand. Opening it he found a coin made of pure gold that when he picked it up dissolved in his hands, and just like that a whole new range of possibilities opened up to him and despite all the sadness of that moment he couldn't help but smile.
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……
"Are you sure it's okay to you take care of Jamie, Will?"
"Yes, Mr. Fischer, you know I've been doing this for years."
"Still, I'd imagine you'd want to enjoy your last few days of spring break before returning to college."
"Ah, you know I've never had the most lively social life. And it's a pleasure to spend some time with him, it's like he's a little brother."
"Thank you very much Will, you know I see you as a nephew too. And I'm sorry again, but Lauren is on night shift at the hospital and this urgent appointment came up."
"Like I said, Mr. Fischer. No problem, it's a pleasure." Replied the twenty-year-old boy standing at the door of Detective Fischer's comfortable suburban home, with a smile on his face.
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After giving his eight-year-old son a hug and apologizing for his absence, Michael got into his SUV and responded to the message from the unknown number but which belonged to a person he would probably know very well. He just couldn't imagine how much.
….
Michael Fischer was a tough man, with few smiles, shaped by the service to his country, he had served in Afghanistan and seen the horrors of war firsthand. Upon returning he enrolled in the police academy and at the age of 35 he was a detective in one of the busiest police stations in the large metropolis in which he lived. His reputation for being harsh had spread quickly among his colleagues and the criminal population, earning him admirers but also many enemies, even among his colleagues, as everyone knew that he could become ruthless in his endeavor for what he thought was fair.
For him there was no such thing as the spirit of the law, the law was the law and had to be followed, which did not prevent him from using its obscure margins, often bringing him closer to the behavior of the same subjects he sought with so much to penalize. Something that many of his detractors loved to use against him. Mainly old Sergeant Adams, a member of the union and activist for racial equality, who seemed to see some of the positions adopted by him as racist. Which wasn't true, because for him a criminal was a criminal, regardless of social class or color and they all deserved punishment and if Michael was the one to lead them to it, so much the better.
Anyone who knew Michael from work could never imagine that the rigid and tough guy was a loving father and husband, a helpful neighbor and an active member of the Lutheran church where he was loved by everyone and recognized for carrying out social works. The church was indeed a very important place for him, as it had been his home for years and was deeply related to why he acted so stoically.
Michael had been orphaned at a very young age and had known the reality of the streets, he himself had almost been one of the strays he hated so much if it hadn't been for the shelter of religion and maybe that was the reason he persecuted social misfits so much, the notion that he had almost been one of them. And if there was one thing he knew from the bottom of his heart, it was that he would do everything to make sure Jamie didn't have to go through the same thing.
It was this responsibility with his son, the result of his relationship with Lauren, the nurse who had taken care of him after the accident that ended his short military career, that he thought about while looking at the photo that served as the wallpaper on his cell phone, showing him and his son on a summer afternoon.
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Michael sighed when he saw his son's face being covered by a message notification on his cell phone screen saying simply: Apartment 416. He knew it was imprudent of him to go alone and talk to Javier, but the criminal represented a great chance of incapacitate several of the city's gangs. An opportunity he couldn't pass up. Resigned, he got out of the car and entered the building, not knowing that the man who entered would be very different from the one who would leave.
….
The first thing Michael felt when entering the apartment was cold, the temperature inside was many degrees lower than expected, as if it were the height of winter. Adjusting his coat to his body, he observed the simple but comfortable living room with attentive eyes, but the room was completely empty. The second thing to hit his senses was the smell of flowers, so intense that it seemed as if he had entered a flower shop. Guided by that aroma, he arrived at one of the apartment's bedrooms and there he found Isabel Ruiz's corpse lying on a bed of flowers.
"Shit..." He exclaimed as he ran out of the room and grabbed his cell phone to call reinforcements, realizing what a mistake it was to go to that place alone. Javier Ruiz was a dangerous man and would certainly be distraught over the death of the only family figure he had ever known, even if he was a total psychopath as Michael was sure he actually was. Which only made things worse, only God knew what that kind of monster would do in that situation, although Michael was about to find out.
Upon returning to the previously empty room he found himself face to face with the man known as Goliath, and at that moment two things became clear to him. The first was that Javier's nickname was justified, sitting in an armchair that could barely contain all of his enormous muscles, he actually resembled the image of the biblical giant. And the second thing was that he had fucked everything up.
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Staring at the gargantuan figure in front of him, Michael, without realizing it, let slip the thought that occupied his mind.
"Fuck!"
"Not yet." Was Javier's enigmatic response. As his serious face broke into a terrifying smile.
"Look, Javier, I'm sorry about your aunt, but I had nothing to do with..."
"Spare your words. There is nothing you can say that will change your destiny." Javier interrupted. While Michael faced him while realizing that there would in fact be no chance of dialogue. So Michael tried to take his pistol from his holster, only to realize that he was completely paralyzed. Which led him to be dominated by a feeling he hadn't felt in a long time: fear.
Noticing this, the giant stood up, with the maniacal smile back on his face.
"You're trapped in my net, detective. And because of your own choices. Isn't it curious? How do our choices seal our destinies? My parents' choices brought me to Tia Isabel. My choices led me to your police station and yours choices took her away from me, but they also gave me the opportunity to have everything I ever wanted, to take revenge on everyone who got in my way and finally occupy the place I deserve."
"What are you doing to me, you psychopath?"
"Shut up, I already said you don't need to talk, not yet." Javier replied, while a strip of golden metal closed Michael's mouth, making his eyes widen in surprise.
"Interesting, isn't it? Who would have thought that my poor aunt had in her hands the power to shape the universe at will and never used it. I wonder how many years this power was there on that shelf begging to be used while she resisted. If it weren't for the idiotic work from your team perhaps this power would never have reached me. So for that I am grateful to you... friend. No, no friend, I told you this before, we will never be friends, which doesn't stop us from being other things. " Javier whispered in Michael's ears, who in turn tried desperately to escape, only to realize that his feet were surrounded by the same metallic substance.
"Let's see what you have to offer, Detective." Javier added as the metallic substance liquefied and encompassed Michael's body.
"Interesting." Javier muttered as the substance solidified, forming what looked like a metal statue that vaguely resembled the naked image of the man inside it.
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Earlier that day when Javier touched the coin, which was actually much more than that, a wave of information invaded his mind. That simple coin was in reality one of the most powerful artifacts known in the universe, a Reality Warper that transferred into the man's mind everything he needed to know. There were a few more models on our planet, one of the silver ones was even located in a city a few hundred miles away from where they were. But silver mattered little when you had gold. And Javier's gold would allow detective Michael Fischer to be reshaped in any way he wanted, from his personal history, through genetics to the deepest of thoughts. Know that gave Javier the greatest excitement of his life, which was manifested through the immense erection that almost burst his jeans and that would have been very visible to poor Michael if he hadn't been trapped inside his golden cocoon.
"Let's start." Javier said out loud as if Michael could hear him, while he placed his huge hand on the golden figure's chest, causing waves of energy to spread and its face to lose any defining features. At the same time, the figure's body increased in muscle, reacting to one of Goliath's great fetishes, men as big as himself, that he could subdue. and use.
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While that transformation was taking place, Michael Fischer's mind and story opened up to Javier like a file that he could alter at will. He saw the orphanhood, the importance of the church, the desire to serve the country, the injury during his time serving abroad, the loving relationship with his wife and the concern for his son. But also the harsh and cruel treatment given to those he considered outcasts and the dubious selectivity with which he treated people of color, although he denied it even to himself. He also saw how the police officer prided himself on rectitude and incorruptibility and did not tolerate colleagues who did not act with the politeness, rectitude and severity that he expected from a police officer. Upon seeing all that, Javier smiled and started working.
He knew that what he was doing would not only alter the man trapped in the cocoon, but all of reality, including his own, and so he took care to create the reality that best benefited him. When he was satisfied with his work he secured another revenge, he will left the police officer consciousness last a few minutes after the work is completed and a completely different person takes that place.
Javier removed his hand from the figure's chest and watched the waves of energy spread through it, reconfiguring it into a very different form. After a few seconds he found himself in front of the image of an enormous man, of clearly Latin descent like his own, of approximately his age and size as large, if not larger.
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The smile remained on his face as the golden coating dissolved and revealed the image of the man inside.
"Hello Detective Flores." Javier said, looking at the huge man still disoriented in front of him, but who quickly frowned and looked at him with irritation.
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"Ruiz you son of..." Michael started to say only to hear his own deep voice and stop, as he didn't recognize it, just as he didn't recognize the weight of his own body or the hands at which he looked next.
"What did you do to me?"
"Don't worry Miguel, everything will make sense soon."
"Miguel? What?..." Michael began to say until he was invaded by a wave of memories that weren't his but were undoubtedly real.
He saw a Latino boy walking alone through the city streets, until he stopped in front of a church and sat down, only to be chased away by a blond pastor.
"This is no place for people like you!" Said the man.
A new memory, the boy, now around 13 years old, very tall but very thin, wandering down the street and being chased by older boys under the gaze of a police patrol who did nothing to help him.
The boy at 18 enlisting not because he had any patriotic desire within him, but because it was a way to get food and money.
The young man at 21 years old, very different from what he had been until then, now strong and muscular due to finally receiving an adequate diet and military training, not to mention the exorbitant use of anabolic steroids.
The same young man a few months later took advantage of an accident to injure himself and avoid being sent to a mission to the country. After having spent the last few years exchanging sexual favors with superiors to avoid more dangerous missions.
The young man being cared for by a young nurse for whom he pretended to be interested only to guarantee his livelihood. Then a visit of an acquaintance from his orphanage days who sold him the idea of ​​joining the police and acting as an informant in exchange for money.
The man looking at the son he had with the nurse with slightly interest. The intense sexual encounters with random men while he maintained the sham marriage because it guaranteed him a good image.
The man charging the same pastor who had kicked him off the church's sidewalk a monthly fee to ensure that criminals did not vandalize the property. Criminals he had hired himself.
The man being all smiles and jokes, to be seen as a man of warm and pleasant behavior, well-liked by those who didn't know what he was hiding and feared by those who saw what was beneath the facade that hid the selfishness and ambition within him. Climbing the career ladder in the police, demanding favors, blackmailing and cheating. Building an external image of a respectable family man while getting rich with bribes and providing information to his former acquaintance, with whom he had constant and animalistic sexual relations, with both constantly disputing who would dominate the other.
Michael initially observed those images with detachment because they were so foreign to the life he knew and the image he had of himself that there was no possibility of him associating himself with them.
However, he couldn't help but place himself little by little in the moonlight of that other man, in that other life, it was as if an immense force was pushing him in the direction of that life so foreign to him. Little by little he began to feel that boy's pain, loneliness and anger to the point where he was able to justify to himself some of the attitudes of the man he had become, no matter how alien and distant such attitudes were from his way of thinking.
"But were they really that distant?" He thought with the heat of burning anger in his chest, the bitterness of humiliation in his mouth, the joy of victory, of making others feel what it was like to be on the losing side and the pleasure, the immense pleasure in manipulating, conquering, dominating. ...
"No, no... what about Lauren?" A woman to be by his side, support him and meet his needs.
"No, he loved her!" Well, he loved what she had given him, and that was, in a way, a kind of love.
"No, no, no! And Jamie! Jamie!" When he thought of his son, Michael felt that expanding force slow its inexorable advance. But at that moment another thought took hold. It's obvious that he loved the boy, after all he was a continuation of himself and when the time came he would teach the kid everything he needed to do well in life and he would make sure that his son knew his rightful place, above all others. But until then he didn't have much to do for the kid, other than paying the minimum attention to him so that he felt happy until the moment he was ready. With the childhood he had himself, he knew how necessary this was. As well to maintain the appearance of a responsible family father. So if every now and then he had to take the kid to play ball or ride a bike in the park, it would be a small price to pay.
Even more so because those walks had been the perfect excuse for some of the most interesting encounters he had ever had. Last weekend for example, one of the boring afternoons he spent with the boy turned into a memorable day in which he fucked hard a twink in the park bathroom, while Jaime played ball with Will, the neighbors' unbearably annoying son.
It was after the memory of that pleasure start to vanish that a last memory came to his mind: the man kissing his business partner and occasional lover in a familiar living room. And the man's animalistic smile as he undressed in preparation for the usual contest of strength that would culminate in one of the two being brutally fucked by the other.
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"Hello Goliath" Detective Miguel Flores said to his long-time partner in crime and in bed at the same time that Michael Fischer's last shred of consciousness disappeared within that corrupted mind.
.....
After the wild sex Miguel watched amazed the dancing golden metal ran through Javier's hand, unable to believe the other man's story. Neither of them seeming the least bit concerned about the fact that they had sex with a corpse in the next room.
"It's impossible for something like this to exist."
"Let me prove it to you then, I'm dying to expand the business, bring me one of your colleagues from the police station and I'll show you."
"It's very risky, Javier."
"You do not trust me."
"Of course not."
"Fine, then let's think of someone. As soon as you arrest some of the smaller members of the Maldonado and Deshaun gangs there will be a drop in the distribution of some places and so I will need people to take over. Let's start small. It would have to be someone whose change doesn't generate too many unforeseen ripples and who has access to potential consumers. A professor? No, perhaps a college student..."
Upon hearing that a wicked smile appeared on Miguel's face, only to be mirrored by the other man when he heard what the detective had to say.
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