#i'm writing more
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monorayjak · 1 year ago
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I want to come out to the people I care about. I want to be honest with them. I've written and rewritten a letter to my mom about all of it tens of times now; I just... I'm scared.
What if they don't believe me? What if they try to convince me I'm wrong? What if I am wrong? And I just went through all of this because I tricked myself? What if its the exact opposite and they try to pull me farther for my own good without realizing this stuff takes time? What if my extended family finds out? I mean one of my uncles is already a mentally unstable bigoted religious freak who's considered killing people and himself before because he can. What if people I care about get hurt? But also... what if I can't keep going like this much longer? It hurts. So much. Its fucking with my grades, I'm scared. I feel like I'm fucking up so much.
It just... it feels like no matter what I do is wrong.
Holy shit
I'm living in a trolley problem.
If I take action, it's untelling how many will be affected; but if I don't take action it will just be me affected at first. But even if I don't take action, I get the feeling the people I care about will be hurt as well, just later on. You know... now that I've thought that through... maybe I should make a list of things that could happen depending on the choice, kind of like a pro-con list, but... is that stupid?
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returnsandreturns · 1 year ago
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in my heart and soul, aziraphale enjoyed sex with interesting people a few times a century in the same way he enjoyed wine and rich food and very rare books.
and crowley has had sex a few times just to better understand lust for demon scheme reasons and maybe a few other times for curiosity but it doesn't really hit him how good it can be until it involves love and also aziraphale treating him like wine or rich food or a very, very rare book
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lich-of-the-golgari · 1 year ago
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Wedge Discussions
Inspo goes to @monorayjak, this was such a cool concept I wanted to build off that.
Sultai Edition
Blue: Here we are again
Black: So it would seem.
Green: What could they possibly want?
Black: Who cares? The question of what the user wants is arbitrary, what do WE want?
Green: That's not how we do things. That's not how ANYONE does things.
Blue: Oh stop bickering. Listen, we need to come up with what the user wants.
Green: Fine.
Black: Fine.
Black: What I want is to be in control of my destiny. I don't want to be beholden to anyone and anything. I am tired of life, which tries to restrict me from my ultimate goal. I want to become more powerful and control the world around me, and I don't care how I get to that point.
Blue: I guess I understand. I want mastery, perfection, knowledge, and the means to achieve them. I don't care if I have to use artificial methods, I WILL become perfect.
Green: I can understand your desire to grow, but I can't agree with either of your methods. I think the true method of becoming better is understanding the natural processes of this world, evolving as a person, and becoming stronger through our understanding of our interconnected nature.
Black: Yeah yeah, we all know green, things need to be natural and survival of the fittest, but isn't ambition and trampling on others the way to effectively grow?
Green: Not necessarily. We all are a part of an ecosystem, whether we like it or not. By trampling on all prey, we starve ourselves. By having individuals stronger than us, we are motivated to grow ever still. Being at the top of the food chain doesn't mean we succeded, it just means we have fit in our role.
Blue: Why does it have to be that way green? Not everything has to be about nature and ecosystems and all that. While we are a part of the world to some extent, if we want, we can separate ourselves from that entirely.
Black: I can't believe I'm saying this but listen to blue. With artifice and undeath, we can remove ourselves from the struggle to survive and just focus on ourselves. Why care about the natural order when we can supersede it?
Green: Because no matter how distant you are from nature, no matter how unnatural your existence, life and death exist in a seamless continuum. Even if you were to become a lich, your corpse would still decay, you would still become food for the microbes, mushrooms, and bacteria that are present around you. Even if you become artificial, the forces that power you will eventually be grown over as your power sources decay. Nothing is truly eternal, nothing will truly last forever.
Black: I mean, you are right that nothing escapes death, even undeath IS just another form of death. However, the ego can survive after death. How it's stored is irrelevant, as that can last the tests of time. Look at Yawgmoth. While Phyrexia was a disaster of plane, it did show that the ego can survive an eternity. Yawgmoth was present in the mind of all of Phyrexia.
Blue: Again, I do think that black has a point. Through innovation the mind can last forever. However, I do see green's point. Most of what we do won't be able to last. How do we achieve our goals if our goals are fundamentally separated?
Green: Well what do we value?
Black: Myself. Power above all else.
Blue: Knowledge. The pursuit of perfection through craft and thinking.
Green: Growth. The pursuit of connecting myself to the ecosystem and to fulfill my purpose in the food chain.
Blue: So we all value improvement of the self?
Black: We disagree on the methodology.
Green: So how do we unify our thoughts to become one force?
Blue: The survival of the fittest is inherently self-motivated.
Black: As is the pursuit of knowledge for knowledge's sake.
Green: And Death is a natural part of life.
Blue: But things don't need to end at death.
Black: We all serve a vital role in our ecosystem. Without death, things can't get fertilized.
Green: And without cultivation, we become stagnant.
Blue: So it's important to find a balance
Black: And it's better that we are the ones to be in control, since we are the ones studying it.
Green: And as long as we keep to our positions
Blue: We all can get stronger
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faeriekit · 1 year ago
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"This fic was ai generated—" Cool, so lemme block you real quick
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noperopesaredope · 1 year ago
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I wish we had more female characters like Eleanor Shellstrop. One of the most unlikable people you've ever met. Read a Buzzfeed article on most rude things you can do on a daily basis and decided to use that as a list of goals. Makes everyone's day worse just by being there. Dropped a margarita mix on the ground and tried to pick it up, only to get hit by a row of shopping carts which pushed her into the road where she was hit by a boner pill delivery truck, killing her instantly. Cannot keep a romantic partner despite being bisexual. Had a terrible childhood but will die before she gets therapy. Best employee at a scam company. Just the worst but also can't help but root for her to improve.
Absolute loser. Girl-failure. Bad at almost everything. Literally perfect female character.
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redactedrem · 9 months ago
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Headcanon where after so many arguments between the batkids and Bruce over his paranoia and complete disregard for his kids privacy, the entire family had compromised with (in the healthiest way possible) downloading life360 on their phones and that's how they all keep track of each other.
Now Bruce knew that this is mostly for his benefit and is supposed to be a healthy alternative for his unhealthy paranoia and helicopter parenting, but what he wasn't expecting was for his kids to start keeping track of him.
He's putting gas in his car and Dick calls him because apparently Dick has been watching him drive around on the app? And Bruce is currently at a gas station thats right around the corner from a Taco Bell and now Dick wants him to get food for everyone since he's already there.
He's driving home from a meeting and Steph calls him because her and Duke were shopping in the area and wants to know if he can pick them up, when he asks how she knew he was on the same street, he gets a "Oh I just like to stalk everyone on the app for funsies." as an answer.
Jason calls him and he can barely get out a hello before Jason cuts him off, "Bruce why the fuck is your phone battery on 5%, charge your damn phone" which completely stuns him because why does he know that. He clears his throat before answering. "Jason, what?"
"Everyone can see each others phone batteries on '360, now charge your phone." Is all he gets before Jason hangs up on him.
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letmetellyouaboutmyfeels · 4 months ago
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I am incredibly serious right now when I beg you all, please, and if you have Twitter or Tiktok or whatever to please spread the word: click on an author's profile on Ao3.
You want to know if an author has written more? Want to know if they're still writing? Want to see more from them? Want to know if they've written a trope or kink or sex scenario you enjoy?
Click on their name. And look at their profile.
I cannot tell you how many times in the last six months someone has read a new or newer fic of mine and said they (a new reader who has read nothing else I've done) "can't wait to see what you do next!" I've written 50+ fics and over a million words already.
"I don't know if you're still writing..." click on my profile. I am. I literally wrote a 128k+ fic for that ship last month.
"Would you ever do X?" "Please do Y!" I already did. Click on my name and look at my works.
Archive of our Own is a library. It's an archive. Not social media. It is your responsibility to fight back against the laziness that corporate algorithms have trained into you.
Click my author name. Just click it. Just click it.
Before you demand more, or ask if a writer will do XYZ, or wonder if the author still writing, or anything - click on their profile. Click on the author's profile.
I'm not trying to be mean or condescending or anything like that. I'm just exhausted. It's disheartening and frustrating to repeat myself ad nauseam, because someone couldn't take thirty seconds to do the tiniest bit of work to see if I've written lately, if I've written more for their ship, or scan my works to see if I've written what they're asking for. Please. Please. I'm begging.
Click the author's name, and explore before you ask.
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smoosie · 8 days ago
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(Which arm, Viktor, huh ? Which one ??)
They were not a couple so, Jayce (who had a very bad day and just wanted to hug it out) proceeded to freak out, backed out of the lab and never mentioned it again but, Astral Viktor, that mf ? He'd be delighted to remind Jayce of that moment in time, of that missed call and watch him die from embarrassment and resentment over himself
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(I'm glad they've never beaten the gay allegations and never will)
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tossawary · 3 months ago
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This is petty fandom salt, BUT... I've been chewing on this phenomenon that I've been calling "Fandom's Darling". It is related to things like "Author's Darling" and "Mary Sue / Gary Stu" and "Protagonist Halo" and all that jazz, where one character gains a peculiar narrative weight in a story.
"Author's Darling" is when a writer has a favorite character, and the world and all other characters sort of get... warped to put the Darling in the spotlight. It's most noticeable in TV shows with multiple writers, when a character you personally like suddenly has their previous characterization destroyed to make another character look good somehow. Every other character might become weirdly incompetent. The Darling's feelings are treated as The Most Important Feelings in any given situation. The logic of the fictional world seems broken past suspension of disbelief in order to validate this one character's beliefs or skillset or some other fantasy. And so on.
"Fandom's Darling" is what I've been calling the pattern where a fandom essentially crowns a New Protagonist for their fanfiction stories (it's often a side character rather than the original protagonist, but it can also happen to protagonists). This character becomes the self-insert for all sorts of indulgent fantasies, gaining special powers or backstories, and/or becoming the focus of extreme whump, and/or hooking up with all the various hotties, starring in all sorts of tropey AUs, and so on. They're not always an obvious Mary Sue version of themselves, but the character's original personality and interpersonal relationships tend to get warped or dropped completely, and other characters tend to become a little flat around them. I call it "Fandom's Darling" because it's not just one self-indulgent fantasy fic (you do you! Have fun!) with characterization choices that I don't vibe with (I have neither the time nor the desire nor the authority to police anything, I am just venting), but rather a prolific mini-fandom of sorts revolving around this empty doll / fanon version of the chosen vessel character, so it becomes a little unavoidable.
I am salty about this (mildly frustrated) (imagine a soft sigh of disappointment before I just go do something else) because you are FUCKED if you actually liked the canonical version of this character and their interpersonal relationships. It's almost worse than liking an obscure character that no one cares about. There's about a thousand fics starring your fave, but maybe only about a dozen of them are actually rooted in any kind of recognisable canon.
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lazylittledragon · 9 months ago
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if i had a nickel for every au spawned from twitter that i SWORE i was going to be normal about
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mischievous-thunder · 5 months ago
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Deadpool and Wolverine is a fanfic in the movie form that feels as much like a fever dream as a rom-com. The content creator only gave it an R rating as an umbrella term which includes all of the following ao3 tags:
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Canon-Typical Violence, Blood and Gore, Canon Divergence, Multiverse, Meet Ugly, Enemies to Friends, Age Difference, Bickering, Undeniable Sexual Tension, Mutual Pining
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Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Survivor Guilt
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Pain Play, Car Sex, BDSM, Rough Sex, Size Kink, Porn with Feelings, Aggressive Sex, Orgasm Denial, Edging, Power Play, Cock Tease, No Refractory Period
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Semi-Public Sex
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Accidental Striptease
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Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Cuddling, Domestic Banter, Falling in Love, Getting together, Idiots in Love, Old Married Couple in Spirit, Additional Tags to be Added...
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monorayjak · 1 year ago
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More Wedge discussions
Blue, red, and green - Perfection through knowledge, action, and growth. Blue: Perfection. The ultimate goal. Green: Why? Blue: Why what? Green: Why is perfection the goal? Blue: Because it means we exist in the best way possible. Green: And what does that mean exactly? Blue: I don’t follow. Green: What is the best way possible? Blue: Well, I don’t know right now. Green: You don’t know? Blue: Right now, yes. It requires study and complex thought. Red: Ugh, thought. Blue: Oh no I’m with you two again aren’t I? Green: Yep, we’re all back here. Red: Fuck I’m tired of dealing with this. Green: Look, how about we all just agree to work together for a few minutes so we can get this over with and move on? Red: Sure. Blue: Deal, I suppose. Green: Ok… so I want to start with asking you a question Blue. Blue: Hm? Yes? Green: Will you define perfection? Blue: I just did a moment ago, its existing in the best w- Green: Yes, that's a definition, but not the one I’m looking for. Blue: I don’t follow? Green: Ok, I want you to lay out what perfection means to you, not as in the definition, as in, what does it mean to be perfect? How do we know we have achieved it? Red: Its been far too long since I’ve seen Blue stumped like this. Ha! Blue: Ok, ok… how do we know… I… Green: Hm? Yes? Red: Spit it out! Blue: …I don’t know. Red: UGH! Green: No Red, thats a perfect answer. Blue and Red: What? Green: You don’t know… because perfection is subjective. Red: Where are you going with this Green? Blue: Subjective? How can perfection be subjective? Green: Because everyone has a concept of perfection already. Very few of them are exactly the same as one another. Blue:  I… I actually see your point. Holy shit. Red: Wait wait wait, did you just get Blue, fucking BLUE, to admit that you made a valid point they didn’t see!?!?!? Green: Yes Red, I did. It isn’t that hard really. Red: Please teach me this power. Blue: Please don’t teach them. Green: Perhaps we should move on a bit? Red: Ugh, fine. Blue: Ok, so if perfection is subjective… Green: How do we achieve it? Red: OH! I have an idea! Blue: Is it explosions? Red: NO! Green: Ok, fine, what’s the idea Red? Red: Uh… well… you see… Green: It was explosions wasn’t it. Red: Yeah. Blue: Knew it. Red: Wait, I actually think I do have something this time. Blue: Are you sure it isn’t just explosions? Red: Yes. Green: Ok, good. Let’s hear it. Red: What if we stop trying to achieve perfection through society. What if we focus on the self? Blue: Hmm, maybe that could work… Green: I could see it. Red: So… what does that mean for all of us? Blue: Well, if it’s me looking for perfection, I want to achieve mastery over skills and understand everything I can. Green: If it’s me, perfection means finding my spot in the world and being home with it. Red: For me, it’s all about understanding myself and doing what I want. Blue: Ok, so… mastery, belonging, and identity. Green: I like the sound of that in all honesty. Red: Same here. Blue: Well… in all honesty I think mastery is kind of a natural progression from understanding yourself and your role… Red: So… belonging and identity? Green: Hm, belonging and identity. I could live with that. Red: Yeah, I think I can too. Blue: So… let me ask this… Red, what is identity? Red: It’s who I am. It’s my preferences, my memories, my connections, my heart and thoughts, my emotions. It’s everything that makes me, well, me. Green: Hm that’s interesting. Blue: Ok, now Green… what is belonging? Green: Knowing you have found a home. That you are with people who care for you and who watch out for you. Being with a group you’d be willing to die for. Home. Blue: Ok… so… we want to become… Green: …the best versions… Red: …of ourselves. Blue: There isn’t one way to home and happiness and perfection. Green: There are an infinite number. Red: And everyone walks a different one. Blue: Home and Identity. I… well, I like it! Green: Agreed, Red? Red: Motion carried!...or whatever the fuck I’m supposed to say.
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katsinspats · 22 days ago
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Tragic: Guy you based your entire villain backstory on doesn't even remember you
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trickstersaint · 3 months ago
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i want to introduce you all to a project that is very close to my heart... or lack of one. anyway. for anyone who has ever wanted to play a poem. i'd like you to meet aromanticism
(link opens itch.io - she'll run on html in your browser! please be nice to her!)
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vaimetanyx · 1 month ago
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There is no stopping a star from burning itself out of the night sky
Words taken from - you can love him, but you can’t keep him (Sylvie j.p.)
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composeregg · 3 months ago
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edit (10/23/2024) now that the poll is over: Original version, with 10 questions, from April 2023 here
And, given that the original is from April 2023, that means I can very easily say:
No, this was not an ISAT reference!
Just because I use parentheses and 2nd person pov and love the same concepts of what a time loop can do to a person doesn't mean it's ISAT
(Yes, I like ISAT, the original poll is why I was recommended the game! But if you look at the original, you can see all the origins of the options to choose from, including what spurred me on with the moss option from the replies)
If I were going to make something for ISAT, I would never be so vague, you can simply look at my ao3 for proof of that
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