#i'm sorry to the words i used to write to myself then. i don't want to let them go but i suppose they were too 'naive' for this world
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
i also ten thousand percent agree with that comment reblog about how it is sacrilege that the tybtm drabble "wrecked" only has around 70 notes. truly wtf! i feel like this is true of so many pilot stories in the fandom because people go hardest for joel miller and i think javi p gets the second most love with two seasons of a series and also it being canon that the character is a slut lol but man people do not know what they're missing out on when it comes to frankie and his story and the incredibly deep, intense and HOT stories the beautiful people who write for him come up with, and ptmy and tybtm are def my faves when it comes to frankie! but you are so right (as always) that you have to write for yourself. but i'm so grateful you share it with us as well <3 cannot wait for the next chapter of tybtm!
Hey Nonnie! Happy Frankie Friday to you 🧡🧢✨ (I hope you don't mind, I took the liberty of scattering Frankie gifs throughout my reply)
I'm very sorry you don't get your fill of Frankie 🥺 But then again, there could never be enough of him. How could we ever get sated, right?
Thank you so very much for your kind words 🥰 I'm so glad you think ptmy and tybtm do our Pilot justice. That's all I ever want! And the main reason why, while writing for myself, I'll probably keep sharing my stories (if I continue to write them) is because they're a public tribute to him, on account of my undying love 😌 In other words, I'm obsessed and making it everyone's problem.
But I'm also very weird, and despite the abundance of amazing authors writing for him, I don't actually read Frankie (please don't judge me). You know who I miss? Din. I LOVE reading Din. I came to the PP fandom through my love of Star Wars, and to fanfiction because of my thirst for Din. I'm hoping the movie will bring a new batch of fresh fics for us to feast on!
In the meantime, while I'm sure you already know all about them, here's a non-exhaustive (off the top of my head) list of some wonderful writers who splash in the Fish pond: @frannyzooey @whatsnewalycat @ren-browne-writes @avastrasposts @fuckyeahdindjarin @auteurdelabre @julesonrecord @wildemaven @astroboots @chronically-ghosted @secretelephanttattoo @gracie7209 @jolapeno @charnelhouse @jeewrites @frenchiereading @for-a-longlongtime @djarinsbeskar-writes @morallyinept @goodwithcheese @tinytinymenace arghhhhh there are so many more I'm getting performance anxiety, @pedrit0-pascalit0 bby, could you please help me?
Again, thank you, and a very happy Frankie Friday to you, and to everyone 🧡🧢✨
#the pilot™️#frankie morales#francisco catfish morales#triple frontier#frankie morales fanfiction#triple frontier fanfiction#people are the nicest#happy frankie friday#frankie friday
31 notes
·
View notes
Text
Pretend just for a second that's me bursting through the walls from pure excitement.
Honestly, so many people are putting in so many great points on this post that I can’t respond to each individually. (I wish I could) If you are a writer that has a lot of anxiety I definitely recommend going through the responses of this post! It might help!
I believe that everyone here has great points and honestly, it's helping me a lot. Though I do kind of want to brush up on an area that I know I've been suffering with as a writer and someone who is disabled. Which is partially why I'm making this post now. (I'm in a constant battle with OCD and my ass is normally being handed to me)
Though there is definitely no "Perfect" word length, I know some (such as myself) have problems with fitting in or working without the cursed idea of having the perfect word count. For me, I find myself unable to post a chapter unless it's over 10k words because in my head that is the perfect length. This thought is false but also true at the same time. Apart of me knows that whatever length the chapter is, is perfect. But the other part (let's call it the word goblin) wants to meet a specific goal that is sometimes unachievable.
I'm chronically ill and this bastard (the goblin) wants me to sit down and write a 10k chapter in one sitting and when I don't, he (they/she/it/gob gob? I'm not on a first name or pronoun basis with this thing) begins to jump around in my skull like that DVD logo that never reaches the corner of the tv.
And that's something I'm struggling with right now. I used to be able to write a chapter (over 10k words) and feel proud of it within two days. Now I can barely make it to 4k words in a week but strangely I find that I'm still just as proud, if not more, of the things I'm writing. Even though sometimes I would love for Gregory House to just appear in front of me and bonk me on the head with his silly flamed cane and cure every little problem I have in my head. (Technically Foreman, the neurologist, would be the one who would have to help me but that's beside the point.) I know that without my silly little demon (Tourette's) and his little minions (other disabilities) that I probably would be stuck in the never-ending cycle of burning myself out.
As I write this, I realize that I've kind of lost the point I was making. What I was trying to say before my thoughts went wild was that if you are someone who can't escape the concept of "perfect" or need it to function (because lets be honest, some of us really need to be told what to do, me and decisions are constantly in a boxing ring dodging each other) just know that if you can't meet those standards its ok. It probably doesn't feel ok in the moment but that feeling won't last forever. You'll get back up whether you do it by yourself or someone manhandles you to your feet and smacks some sense back into you. (Or hugs you, what that someone does depends on the person you are. I'm a stubborn and spiteful little bitch so I need to get "smacked around" by someone to realize I don't have to do everything by myself.)
And as someone who needs to visually see that people really don't care that much about word lengths, I'm going to leave some screenshots below and I highly recommend any struggling writers who have OCD, chronic illnesses or are simply just a perfectionist to read them. And maybe it can help :)
Also sorry for the long post, I've been having these thoughts for days now and kind of wanted to release them into the world. But quick conclusion, THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS PERFECT WHEN IT COMES TO WORD COUNT OR IN WRITING. WRITE WHATEVER YOU WANT. WRITE PORN, WRITE FLUFF, WRITE LITERALLY ANYTHING, THE WORLD IS YOURS BABY (the word baby is not being targeted at you as a person or as a reader but is just a word that sounded like it would fit and I felt that it belonged there you know?)
I'm currently writing and trying to figure out what could be a possible middle ground for chapter lengths and just want some general feedback on what the (heavy on quotation) "perfect" length is. But I kind of want to hear why some of these lengths are better than others, or if you're someone who doesn't pay attention to length but the quality what are some things that normally keep you interested in longer chapters (or even shorter chapters) I have my own opinions as a reader but as a writer I'm very interested in what the 'general' opinion is. (I don't think I'll personally cater to the majority, but I really enjoy conversations that revolve around topics like this and its been a while since Ive had a deep conversation with other readers/writers and wanted to start one if anyone wants to discuss :)
#Sorry I'm kind of a rambler when it comes to these things#I have so many opinions and thoughts and they have to break free Freddie mercury style#there is no such thing as perfect and I refuse to let anyone believe there is#Except myself#I'm built different and can handle having to have things perfect#i kind of really hope that this is helpful to someone#though just want to toss it out there that if you are someone out there struggling with some of things I am don't be afraid to bug me#I enjoy having a good conversation about topics like that#I'm better at answering asks then dms but I will get to you at some point I promise :)#also i couldn't help but drop a house reference#what can I say im a little silly#though if anyones curious#I have tourettes/adhd/OCD/ FND (which includes chronic pain and seizures) which heavily impacts my ability to do things#and I hate being disabled but Im not afraid or ashamed of what I have I just didn't want to have the entire post being about my disabilitie#I now feel like I got something off my chest and hope everyone has a wonderful day#Imma go back to writing steddie now#i hope this post makes sense
45 notes
·
View notes
Text
✧*:・゚Art summary 2024
2014-2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021
#art summary#art summary 2024#art summary meme#my art#I know two years are missing but I wanted to get back to doing this summary#no art in November apart from that little mushroom so I didn't separate Aster and Kornelia (I like that drawing lol)#I draw significantly less and even less for myself but I don't mind for some reason#idk maybe my hyperfixation is now writing#I used to draw and learn about art and consume it in every way#and then I think Al came in and started to slowly destroy that obsession bringing doubts about my skills and the whole sense of creating#I don't look for new art that much because the constant suspicion spoils the joy of exploration#I don't feel like posting drawings in low res blurry with added artefacts knowing they will be ground into mush anyway#all so the rich dudes become richer and the spiteful dudes drown in their own venom#I know writing is treated the same way as visual art#it's art after all so something useless and pointless#but at least I don't have to post my chapters every month and watch as they disappear in the everyday slop#though I'm sure the big bosses will take my words and feed them to the machines as well because why not#sorry about the tags xD#HAPPY NEW YEAR! (soon)#I hope 2025 is the year the Al bros choke ;)
146 notes
·
View notes
Text
On Wednesday before I gave my presentation I confessed to a new employee that I was worried it would be too long and she brightly told me her life hack was to just let AI rewrite things for her. She said I should put in all my talking points and ask ChatGPT to give me a five minute exactly presentation. I was like....how is the most polite possible way (since this is a new colleague I shouldn't get off on the wrong foot with) that I can express that I will Not be taking this advice. Ever. I told her that I didn't think we were allowed to use ChatGPT at this job (we most certainly are not, it is a nightmare for any type of protected information) and also that I prefer to write all of my own work. Despite my best efforts the last part of that was still passive aggressive, lol.
Something about being a writer makes it so that it's almost offensive to me for someone to suggest I use AI to do my work instead? Like, the day I reach the point where I let AI write something for me is the day y'all need to be checking me for brain damage because clearly I'm losing it
#i also told her i was capable of making a 5 minute presentation but that i had too much information to cover to explain the project in 5 min#and she was like oh that makes sense!!#but like im sorry 😭am i the insane one or like....#idk to me suggesting I use AI isn't a helpful suggestion it reads as someone telling me i don't know how to do my job#does that make sense?#i don't consider it a lifehack or working smarter instead of harder. it seems like you're suggesting i am incapable of writing well myself#i know a lot of people right now thing AI is the best thing ever#to me it's a blatant omission that you can't do your own work or think for yourself#this is also even crazier of a suggestion to me because that morning i had TWO managers on call debating wording of a sentence#like we were reveiwing this presentation tightly so that we said exactly what we wanted to and met the standards of our administration#chatgpt is not going to understand the nuances of what we can/cannot say or official/approved wording lol#i think we use ai tools in the sense of like...photoshop generative fill or ai stuff in scientific research/arcgis#but i'm like 99% sure we were banned from using chatgpt over privacy concerns of putting controlled information into it#anyway. idk. i know not everyone writes as well as i do.#but i'd rather read bad writing that came from a person than something that was generated for you tbh#and i will help review my colleagues' writing any day
33 notes
·
View notes
Text
omg guys proshipper isn't "basic dni criteria", like that list is supposed to represent actual irl issues(*), not some 2020 internet discourse. you guys are so annoying like if you're uncomfortable interacting with proshippers i understand and respect it, although you probably have a very twisted idea of what the word means (would make a separate post abt it but there are hundreds already). but please don't equate it to actual crimes. (*)also do you seriously think that a bigot troll is going to read your dni and be magically expelled from your strong aura. if anything it's going to make them want to harass you more. it's obvious that those lists are just a pose like "if i don't put racists dni they're gonna think i'm racist" NO aaagh you don't have to over-specify(?) everything about you when interacting online can we please go back to being normal istg. reject modernity embrace not writing a dni list and just blocking people like a normal person <3
#tsun.txt#also ppl who write all their triggers and traumas are you fr that too is going to make it easier for trolls to harass you#children need to learn basic internet safety etc etc#i needed to vent bc i've been on toyhouse and i'm SO tired of everyone using the “warning” tab for fucking dni's#come and block me yourself bitch. the warning is supposed to be info about what could trigger ME.#BRO i just remembered once i was looking at the artists that were going to attend a con and one of them had fucking proship dni in their bi#like IMAGINE limiting your sales bc you care about what other people like to read?? i'm going to put fucking. idk. team kira dni.#also i sometimes go to cons as an artist too. imagine if i got placed next to that person#what do they want me to do? them: “hey can you move your chair a little” me: ignoring them bc i read their dni#it's INSANE#not @ me being paranoid abt ppl cancelling me for this post despite having like +300 blocked accounts#but i'm coming out (?) as a non-harasser. like i don't even use the word profiction. i'd rather call myself normal.#i sound like those people who're like my pronouns are nor/mal but FR this used to be the norm in fandoms *sob*#also ppl online are limiting their interactions for not wanting me to reblog their art but okay#in MY case i'm hella limiting my interactions for not wanting to be harassed. we're not the same.#i be like why does this have so few notes *has half the fandom blocked*#and ppl probably wouldn't even notice bc most of what i post is wholesome but then i write textposts like this. better safe than sorry#discourse
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
Magenta 😟
#I've had cognitive impairment from covid before but not to where i feel intellectually dumb when i write#my college papers and my writing projects dont sound like “me” as of late#its very bare bones and doesn't have the descriptiveness or humanity i normally give#like i see the scenes or what i want to say in my head#but what i type aint matching up#and yeah i naturally get into slumps like that but this is like that slump x 9000#I'm kinda scared this round might've given me brain damage#havent been feeling all the way like myself#but i also know too that covid takes a while to heal from and of course theres long covid shit which ive dealt with before#im just frustrated guys#i feel like within the last 3 to 4 months i finally healed from my last bout of rona#and i get it again and im back to square one#i just want to write and feel okay with it and not feel so stuck just trying to come up with a basic sentence#seriously even writing basic shit is hard right now#it took me a week to get 5 pages on duality#and im used to churning out at least 10 pages on my projects at minimum every couple days to a week#man give me chronic pain anyday but don't take away my mind and the freedom that comes with that#sorry guys im feeling sad#i know i gotta give myself time but im impatient#i hate how right before i caught covid again i was gonna get my flu shot and an updated covid vax#wish i could've avoided this crud#having weird chest shit too#was a heart thing now its gerd now its potentially back to a heart thing#im tired#i need a hug#i love you 🫂💙#magenta is my vent word
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
You can use a lot of words you know? You don't have to talk yourself around stuff like "It's famous Nazi code for an abbreviation for their popular motto which I won't be repeating here" when you really can just explain that 88 is supposed to represent the Hitler salute because H is the 8th letter in the alphabet? You don't even have to say the words but I mean wouldn't it make more sense to actually explain something instead of vaguely talking around it for some sense of...of what? What's the use in nor calling the thing by it's name? Won't that do more harm than good? I mean if people know they shouldnt do something but don't really know why then they won't take it that serious no?
#sorry very stream of consciousness type of posting (and is there ever any other kind on this blog?)#and if it's about the actual word then you can use those uh#goose feet#the uh#'''''<- those#usually in text you put quotation marks yes thats the word around words with complicated historical connotations#thats how I've been tought at least#I'm not sure if that's how it goes in america but I've been tought that you never use words like the Nazi “the Jew'' without quotations#because they are historically and socially critical and in a text it would look like you're actually kind of a nazi yourself if you just#threw words around like that#yanno?#i think thats better than not using words because they might me triggering#i will respect it if asked of course but I'm not going to censor myself for the sake of seeming more sanitised or whatever#i hate that kind of trend that seems to be in media nowadays#whatwith unalive and grape and all#we have words for that. use them. do you not hear yourself. ''why are we glorifying corn on paper'' do you not feel shame writing like that?#it's all very. idk#almost performative it feels like#you know how I mean?#we're not going to say the evil evil words because people might be triggered (as if they'd be less triggered if you added one letter i don't#quite think thats how reading works) but are we actually going to fill the shoes we want to walk in and take the same attitudes#away from the Instagram comment section on a video of someone talking about zeus the mystical figure being depicted as attractive and#acusing them of glorifying a rapist when yeah no the guy was considered attractive can we stop conflating good looks with moriality can we#all just think?#like normal people?#some things you're just meant to be grossed out by why are we trying to make everything seem soft and harmless#''hes a pdf file'' grow a pair will you and talk in a way people will actually understand it's actually good if you're a little upset#by the idea of someone grooming kids that's a good response to have why are we tryinh to minimise that?#this got a tad beavy you don't have tk read until.here but if you did I'm sorry#I'm barely even awake i don't do well like tjis
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
#*beep* oh. hey. guess you're sleeping? maybe you're at work. or out with friends. i hope wherever you are it's good#or that it's getting better. i really do#i'm not good. but you knew that already. otherwise why would i be leaving this message?#sorry. i just need to talk for a bit i guess#cause it's like. every day i write a hundred posts and every day i delete most if not all of them#and i could not tell you why#this is my blog after all. my words and thoughts go here#but also. this is my third place. and i can't lose that#isn't that crazy? i can't lose the handful of notes from reblogging other people's posts#the idea that somehow i'm constructing myself in the cut and paste instead of doing something myself#and i do try to make posts of my own. but nothing's ever worth posting. i don't even let it rot in the drafts. it's just gone#and i try to think about what would stop me from doing this#which inevitably brought me here - what would i be doing if it were fifty years ago#and i think the answer is i'd be calling someone who used to care and blowing up their answering machine#and i think about old answering machines. the ones that need a tape to record the message#does dora just re-record over the tapes that harry fills?#does she trash them? i'm guessing she doesn't listen to them#i won't tell you what to do with this message. i'll spare you a call to action#it's not like a diary would fix this. i have a diary. i've been keeping one regularly for months now#i think i want to be perceived but i refuse to speak unless spoken to and i will not reach out on here unless i'm being a kindly anon#and when i talk irl it's all broken disjointed subjects without predicates#it takes such effort for me to talk that people stop asking me out of kindness. but there's still thoughts i haven't said#thoughts that don't need to be said. we don't *need* another person rambling on about whatever random fandom topic or half-assed scribbles#i tried making serious art and meta posts for like four years across different fandoms#it's all gone now. as is most of my poetry. lotta things i don't know or care to know#and i can't bring myself to do that again. esp if that's not why you're here. so like. it's easier just to remain quiet?#because. i know people *can* understand. but it takes effort#and i can't guarantee a return on investment. i don't know if the cost of teaching me how to talk again is worth it#god i want to infodump but that was beaten out of me. the need is still there but i can't. it hurts#idk. things are good and then things are bad and on the whole they're good and getting better
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
good morning i am just very slightly worried about prom <3
#🌙.rambles#no classes today 🥺 gna do my hw for next week tho n then. yes.#I'M WORRIED THOUGH YEAH BCS. hfdsksdjf most of the other ppl r friends or r in the same class#kinda worried i might not enjoy as much bcs. who knows if i'll be able to talk properly or if i might just get nervous instead#n maybe at one point i cld go to one of my other friends too but she's going w a guy n i don't want to intrude ig#n she has her other friends too. my friend at our table yeah has other friends too#i'm worried i might just. not enjoy at all bcs of anxiety or maybe i'll just feel lonely or smth hdkfajsdlf nothing i can do abt that thoug#maybe when i'm anxious i'll just cope by dissociating n just thinking of noctis or claude or smth 😭😭 or artem n write a story in my head#n i'll go out of my comfort zone n use up all my social energy#recently they just announced in our batch gc that we can have yk same couples. wasn't in the ltp or smth tho 🥹#wish i had at least another friend or smth. so maybe it wld've been possible to bring one of my friends from another school ^^#platonically bcs she's like. bi. 🫣 i'm still rather amused at how she. mentioned she was bi when like#i had my arm around her shoulder n she said smth along the lines that it was kinda weird for her bcs she wasn't used to it?? IDK 😭😭#didn't quite catch the rest of her words but sorry girl i'm just naturally affectionate w my friends#n idk why but if you're like. biologically female or actually even just like. yk your gender is female n you identify along those lines#i'm just automatically more comfy w you n physically affectionate.#nyways she told me she doesn't have prom tho when we were talking abt sch we were like talking abt school events n :<<#hmm. yk it's not like i need. someone for prom like. yk i just need myself. but i guess it's a bit of a childish old wish of mine#that said though i'm fine just still rather worried bcs in social situations i just. end up feeling rlly lonely haha#like i was doing well i rmb friday of the fair but then i was bottling my emotions n pretending i was completely okay 👍#definitely wasn't crying when everyone was away <3 n then my anxiety just. god i don't want to think about it#until the end i was just. hanging on to a piece of thread. sorry you saw me cry a bit. sorry i lied that i was fine#sorry i let myself. go through that. twin n friend laying their heads on my shoulder as they were falling asleep n i was just. crying#n then later that night i just ended up crying even more. painful memories.#just have to accept that my social energy's just shit n ppl will always have another that they'd prefer talking with.#i have. apollo at least yh? n i guess to each person i mean at least. something. i think#sorry i'm not usually like this but it's just. smth i just can't help but be anxious about. one of my biggest insecurities#i'm so used to being alone though i've realized. last year wasn't real goddamn. n. 2020 was.. i don't know#ah i'll be productive now. i. move forward from the past n i never forget in a way that it. helps spur me onwards but#sometimes the past haunts me. sometimes is.. perhaps a big understatement bcs i think too much but. uh. yh that's enough i'm fine.
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Blame It On The Rain [Nicholas Alexander Chavez x reader]
Word count: 855
Warnings: oral (m! receiving), rough sex, shower sex, once again completely self-indulgent
A/N: the obsession is going strong hehehe
Copying or translating my writing is not allowed. If you see my work on another site it is stolen. Reblogs are appreciated and encouraged.
Your boyfriend lay on your bed, scrolling away on his phone. Such a simple task, but he looks so damn good. You lean against the door frame, shamelessly watching your unsuspecting lover.
"Hey, Nick?" You call out innocently.
"Yes, baby?" He looks up from his phone.
"I'm gonna shower."
He looks at you, confused, “oookay..?”
"Join me.”
The corners of his mouth curled up into a mischievous smile, "you askin or tellin?"
You roll your eyes, “Meet me in the bathroom in two minutes!” you turn on your heels and head towards your bathroom.
”Or what?" He shouts, still in your room.
"Or you're not getting head for a month!" You close the bathroom door behind you.
You hastily drop your pants and turn on the warm shower water. You hear Nicholas fumbling around in your bedroom. and you're not surprised when he practically through the door.
"That was like twenty seconds dude,” You feign disappointment.
Nicholas just shrugs, taking off his shirt in one movement.
"The waters not even warm yet!"
"Don't care!" He pulls you in for a rough kiss, tongues fighting for dominance— not like you'd ever win.
You waste no time untying his sweatpants and pulling them down haphazardly. You go to pull down his underwear but are met with bare skin. You pause and pull away, you giggle as he chases your lips for more, “No underwear? what a slut!" You tease.
"Says the one who lured me in here just to fuck me,” he accuses.
You gasp and wrap your nimble fingers around his half-hard cock. "I didn't call you in here just fuck you!" You defend, running your thumb over his slit— he hisses.
”Why am I here then?” His voice is strained.
You hum, pretending to think deeply about his question. letting go of him you take a step back. He whines at the loss of contact, eyes trained on you as you remove your shirt and underwear.
Now, just as bare as him you step into the water stream. you sigh in delight as the waterfalls around you.
Nicholas steps in behind you, “Baby this water is boiling!”
You chuckle and turn around to change the water temperature for him. With for back facing him he wastes no time landing a loud “thwack” on your bare ass.
“Ow!! Nick what the hell!”
“I'm sorry I couldn't help myself!!”
“I'll remember that,” you warn as you pull him closer to you by his waist. “You're so hot,” you playfully bite his chest.
“So are you~” he runs his fingers into your hair and tugs your face up towards him, capturing you in another breathtaking kiss.
His now fully hard cock pressed in between your torsos. Backing up, he pulls you with him until his back meets the shower wall. You recapture his lips in a searing kiss, your greedy hands roaming and feeling his toned body.
You part briefly for air, the both of you breathing heavily. Nicholas’ eyes are deep with desire as he trails kisses along your jaw down to your neck. A soft moan escapes your lips.
As much as you wanted to lose yourself in the feeling of your boyfriend— you had brought him here for a reason. “Let me take care of you,” you offer— pulling back from his grasp.
He looks at you for a moment— pupils blown out in his eager eyes.
He moans pathetically when you finally sink to your knees. “Use me,” you mutter.
“W-what?”
“I want you,” you wrap your hands around the base of his shaft. “To use me,” you kiss up the sides until you reach the tip.
‘A-Are you sure?? I don't want to hurt you!”
“Nicholas,” you state flatly. “I want you to fuck my face. Now.”
He growls, gripping your hair tightly. This is what you've been waiting for!
“Tongue. out,” he demands, you stick out your tongue obediently.
He slaps his red leaking tip on it with his free hand before he presses you all the way down his shaft. He throws his head back and it thumps against the wall behind him as a moan rips through him.
“fuck—” he curses, as he begins his steady rhythm fucking into your mouth.
You run your manicured nails along his toned thighs, leaving red scratches in their wake.
You can feel his cock twitch deep in your throat.
You look up at him through your eyelashes— you moan at his fucked out state. The vibration sends him over the edge as he pulls out of your mouth. The string of saliva connecting your tongue and his tip is downright pornographic. Hot ropes of white cum fall on your face and tongue as your boyfriend shouts obscenities from above you.
You rise from your position on the bathtub floor. You reach up and pull Nicholas down for one final kiss— He whines as he tastes himself on your lips.
You pull away, dopey grin on both of your faces. “See now— that. Is why I called you here.”
Tag list (If you want to be added just comment!)
@Nallasstuff @chmpgneprblem @qoopeeya @lilybellalana @sleepysongbirdsings
#friends#mutuals#art#wattpad#writing#original story#fanfic#fantasy#moodboard#fanfiction#nicholas alexander chavez x reader#nicholas alexander chavez#nicholas chavez#nicholas chavez x reader#father charlie mayhew#charlie mayhew#charlie mayhew x reader#smut
4K notes
·
View notes
Note
Loved your writing of arcane characters saying things they regret during an argument. Would you be willing to do a version with Jayce, Viktor and Silco? I apologize if you don't prefer to write about these characters, you can ignore this
Arcane men saying things they'll regret during an argument. | Viktor, Jayce, Silco x Gn!Reader
Oh, I absolutely am willing to do that, Anon!! These are going to be pretty irredeemable, though, so there is not going to be a part two to this... anyways, enjoy!!<3
Content: Season 2 spoilers!!, heavy angst, hurt/no comfort, break ups, swearing, gaslighting, toxic behavior, sfw
Reader has no mentioned pronouns.
((Not proofread))
》VIKTOR
"This... isn't you anymore, Viktor. A-And I refuse to keep lying to myself like this either!" You hissed out one night, unable to keep it in any longer. You were losing your mind in this compound of his, unable to understand how seemingly no one was able to recognize how wrong everything was. People who were "healed" by him weren't the same after. They turned into robotic and uncanny husks of their old selves.
A terrifying sight that unnerved you deeply. And only you here.
The nail in the coffin was perhaps the skeptical appearance of Councilor Salo. Never in your life had you ever seen him give a damn about anyone but himself. He lived a life of riches and materialism, far from the selfless and minimalistic lifestyle found here. But after your boyfriend healed him of his inability to walk, he suddenly preached the same ideals that everyone else did.
Peace, love, and community.
Those were the important pillars of this idyllic place Viktor had created, and yet you couldn't see past the clear red flags that weaved themselves in their white attire. You were never much of a genius like he was, but it didn't take much brainpower to understand that this was not a great place to be in. No matter how hard he attempted to convince you of that.
"... I'm sorry you feel that way. But I'm afraid I can not follow your reasoning for this claim. I am myself... just someone greater. More meaningful. Isn't that beautiful?" His voice was so gentle and patient in comparison to yours. Something that wasn't unusual to him. But the way he used that tone now made you sick. "Terrifying is a better word, actually... Why can't you see that this is just wrong? You're not healing anyone-" "-But I am. Look around you. Is that not enough for you to finally believe me, my love? I want to create a better world... one in which we can live freely together." Your mind spun, his words ringing in your head dangerously. And you hated every second of it.
This isn't the man you loved anymore. He must have died that fateful day when the sky fell from above, and he covered you with his body to save you. His last act of kindness as your boyfriend and lover before he perished and left behind whoever he was. And you'd be damned if the last good memory got tainted too.
"No. I will not let you play with my mind anymore. I've had enough." You pushed past him, wanting to finally escape this borderline cult. Originally, you had only followed after him because you couldn't bear being without him. Jayce was right, though. He really was different now.
"Hm... it seems like I was right about you after all." You stopped in your tracks yet didn't dare face him. "You truly are not worth saving... you can't grasp the beauty of what I have made. I suppose everyone's claims for your low intelligence were, unfortunately, right. What a shame." How could a devil have such a soothing, loving voice? Why did the monster that now lurked in your shadow have to have your lovers face? The cruelty was too much to bear.
Who would have thought that you'd finally leave him for good after all the years you've taken care of him? This moment felt so surreal and yet ironically freeing as well. The end was near. "Did you... ever even love me?" You asked aimlessly, but didn't wait to hear his answer.
Perhaps if you had, however, you would've seen that sudden spark of surprise in his eyes, as you slipped out of his fingers for good at last.
》JAYCE
You had looked everywhere for him. And after also asking everyone under the sun if they had seen your boyfriend, you had eventually determined that he must've somehow gone missing. Worried sick, it pained you knowing that there wasn't much you could do either, considering that everyone was too busy getting ready for a borderline war and Caitlyn became unreachable as a result. Yet just as you began to lose hope, your dear lover finally returned... but he wasn't the same.
He didn't look the same, nor did he act the same, in fact. He looked so different that it even visibly startled you when you found him rummaging through his once shared laboratory. You had just returned from another wrap around the building in hopes of finding it, and whilst you'd consider yourself lucky this time around, all you now felt was genuine dread.
"Jayce...? What happened to you? I looked for you everywhere and-" You stilled at the intense look he gave you, his face flinching for a moment, as though his mind couldn't comprehend your image. Glancing over at his peculiar weapon of choice, you felt unnerved at how even that looked uncanny. The entire situation was unnerving you deeply, to say the least. "You... You shouldn't be here." He finally muttered, his voice deeper and colder than it ever was. Jayce always had such a fun and warm voice. If you didn't know any better, you would've questioned who he was a while ago.
"Hey... tell me where you were, okay?" You said, trying a more gentle approach as you neared him, eyes focused on his clearly injured leg. Had he been kidnapped? You doubted it. So what made him end up like this? Nothing you could come with explained his appearance. His hair and beard were way longer than they should have gotten in the short span of time he was gone, too.
Reaching down carefully, you tried to inspect his leg, but he seemed less receptive to the idea. Or so you assumed, after he shoved you away roughly and held the hammer to your face at impressive speed. His eyes were glossy, as though he wasn't entirely all there. He was reliving a terrifying moment in his mind, unaware of the horror you were going through. Never could you have ever thought of ending up in this position with him. "Jayce! What the hell are you doing-?" "-Get away! I know what you are... you've been sent by him too, weren't you?" You let out a shriek when he swung the hammer at you, only giving you a fraction of a second to jump out of the way.
Falling onto your behind, you quickly crawled backward and away from him, tears welling up in your eyes. Your scream seemed to at least wake him up, though, as he finally lowered his weapon and blinked at you in surprise. "Fucks sake! What is wrong with you?" You yelled out, yet as fast as his face softened, it hardened again. "... Sorry... I need to leave." Quickly making his way past you, he only barely escaped your presence before you grabbed onto the fabric of his pants. "Why? Where are you going? Why can't you tell me anything?"
The look in his eyes made you shrink away. This wasn't your Jayce anymore. "... The future of everyone in Piltover hinges on me being there on time. Now, make yourself useful for once and get out of my way." Shaking you off harshly, he left you crying on the cold floor of the once lively laboratory, not once looking back.
》SILCO
When you first met Silco, you were both still leading simple lives in the last drop with his brother and all of your other friends in Zaun. The lanes were harsh and, at times, cruel, yet you fought through the agony of it all together. Years down the line later, you find yourself still reminiscing on those heavenly days, particularly those of your lover who had turned for the worst in the time being. And the question of why you didn't listen to Vander's warnings came to mind again then. Perhaps you were just too used to excusing everything his brother did, especially after he had attempted to drown him so horrifically, which left him permanently injured.
But even so... why didn't you just listen? Why did it take so many years for you to finally throw the towel and leave for good? Finally realise that the man you loved was a monster? A disgusting and evil monster who was willing to use the plight of others for his own gain. And for what? Money? Fame? Power? It was all an ego trip you had far more than enough of. Zaun was his playground, and an escape was impossible. You'd be, however damned if you didn't at least try to anyways. Even if just in Vander's honor as a long-awaited apology.
Pushing past the crowd in the stuffy, full Last drop, you finally reached his office upstairs. Not caring about formalities anymore, you knocked and opened the door without awaiting a reply. If death met you behind it, then so be it. "Ah, darling, in a hurry today, aren't you?" "We need to talk. Alone." Short and straight to the point. Raising a brow, he shared a look with Jinx, who was just done giving him his daily "medicine". Oh, how you hated your lover's dearest creation. Shimmer. The exact thing that had ruined your lives for good. But you pushed away your disdain for the task at hand.
Giving Jinx a dismissive wave of his hand, you waited for her to be gone for good before taking a breath to speak. But Silco beat you to it. Always so painfully perceptive. "The answer is no, if you're here asking to leave. I refuse to let you go, dear. You have no one else but me after all. You wouldn't survive on your own." He always underestimated you, so this wasn't an all to surprising response. And if you were just a couple of months younger, you would have maybe agreed and backed off. But you were sick of his games.
"I didn't come here to ask for permission, Silco. I'm here to say goodbye." The slightest, softest crack at the last word gave you away horribly. You certainly didn't expect your feelings for the man to betray you, but even that won't stop you now. Said man just hummed in response as he stood up to face the window. His hands calmly lit a cigar, very much unbothered. But you knew that your sentence had gotten to him anyway with how his hand shook ever so slightly. Out of anger, most likely.
"So you think you can do whatever you want? Leave after you've spent so many years at my side? Your hands aren't as clean as you think they are, darling. Even yours are a bright violet." A reference to the shimmer vials on his desk. He knew how much you hated it, so this felt like a jab. A jab at the deep guilt you felt every day for enabling the death of all of your friends indirectly. If only you had stopped him from the start... then maybe you wouldn't have to feel the dread that ruined you from the inside anymore.
"I've accepted my flaws and sins a long time ago. I may not be better than you... but sometimes, in order to end the cycle, you have to walk away and leave some things behind." You suddenly felt so content, his cold and terrible words not reaching you anymore. You were so close to leaving. So close to leaving Zaun and Piltover like you've always dreamed. But Silco just scoffed in disbelief.
"Hah, don't give me that self-righteous shit... I've been there for you for so many years, dear. I've taken care of you, fed you, and loved you to my best ability for so long. The least you could do is be grateful for my kindness." "So you think I'm a burden?" The silence was deafening, but it was enough to confirm your long-standing suspicions. He had lost his love for you a long time ago. Perhaps the side that loved you so purely drowned in the river with him.
"... Goodbye. I hope one day you can walk away too." You turned and began walking out then, suddenly realising that it's finally over. Shoving your hands into the pocket of your coat, you felt the ticket for the skyship you had to take. "Don't you dare leave. Don't you dare it-" All bark and no bite as usual. There was no stopping you now, and he knew it. He was letting you go after all. You could just hope that one day he'd listen to your words and end the cycle, too.
What a shame that you won't be there at his side to see it, however... maybe in another life then.
#arcane#arcane x genderneutral reader#arcane x reader#arcane x y/n#arcane x you#arcane viktor#arcane viktor x reader#viktor#viktor x reader#arcane silco#arcane silco x reader#silco x reader#silco#arcane jayce#arcane jayce x reader#jayce#jayce x reader
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
'FOGGY STREETS AND CHRISTMAS LIGHTS'
(part 3/3)
I'm gonna infodump about the backstory of this comic, don't feel obligated to read it because it's not cotl related it's just personal stuff, I just want to be able to write about it somewhere cause I can't really talk to anyone about it.
As always, thanks for reading this far, sorry my stuff has been such a bummer so consistently. This comic goes out to all my "christmas induced depression" homies, I left my house maybe like ~5 times all month and it was NOT pleasant hearing "IT'S THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR!!" on the radio when I'm so ready for it to be over. Gonna take it reaaaaal easy til the year ends, you guys take it easy too!! Got some asks I have to respond to when I'm more stable but probably no new comic pages til january
Alright uhhh so this part of the comic is pretty much taken directly from the last time I saw my great-grandma alive, a few days before christmas. She didn't remember me, but at the nursing home there was a piano, and I sat down and played some stuff because I didn't know what to say. I was really into lisa the painful rpg at the time, and I played that "I've got the joy" song that the villain sings without realizing it was an old christian campfire song. She didn't really say much or move that whole night, just kind of gave me a polite blank smile, but started singing the words when I played the notes to that song.
I kinda stopped in shock, my dad frantically asked me to keep playing, so I did. While the comic I made is way more sappy than the actual moment was, I wish I'd cherished the moment longer. I didn't know it was the last time I'd see her alive. Every family christmas was held at her house when she was around, so it's been weird the past few years. I actually lost another dementia-addled grandma to cancer on christmas eve in 2009, so the holiday was already kind of weird for me on top of everything else that makes me sad this time of year. That's what part 2 was about, I'll spare the details but I wrote leshy to act out how I felt back then. Why are we all sad? This is supposed to be a happy time, all the decorations are up and we're almost all here, so why is everyone smiling yet everything feels so wrong? I feel like since leshy's canonically the most ignorant one to things lurking below the surface, he'd be the one to try and make everyone feel better but not quite understand why everyone is so miserable. My first memory of having self injurious behavior came from then, hence why I had leshy pull his leaves off in the last comic. It was confusing and frustrating and I was just old enough to comprehend something was wrong, but not old enough to understand the depth of it, it DEFINITELY didn't help that nobody helped me back then so I made leshy's siblings actually come in clutch instead of grabbing him/yelling at him.
That night with the piano was something that's stuck with me the few years she's been gone, but I felt kind of strange when I asked my dad and my sister about it and neither of them remembered it. The room we were in was completely empty so nobody else witnessed it but us three. I myself have a history of head trauma and memory loss (plus, native americans are disproportionately more likely to develop dementia... lucky us) so if I ever forgot about that moment, there'd be nobody left to remember it. Sometimes when I do comics, it's my way of going "this happened at some point, and the only evidence it ever happened was me witnessing it, so if something happens to me I want the memory to stay alive in some form."
Anyway. The autistic urge to overshare, am I right? Idk what my religious ass great-grandma would think of me drawing demonic comics about my last memory of her, she'd probably think it's funny though cause she raised my dad whose interests have always been "death metal and devil worship". I'm not sure if anyone read this far, I just hope my dumb comics can convey the things I can't say with my voice and struggle to say through text. None of this was supposed to be "feel bad for me!! Woe is me!!", it was supposed to me more like...cathartic? Healing? I almost didn't post this comic because it felt kinda weird, but seeing people connect with it made it worth it imo. Thank you
693 notes
·
View notes
Note
please i'm begging you (please don't feel pressured if your life is busy 💕) we need pt 2 to the angst i can't handle this 😭 my heart 💔 the writing is too good that i'm feeling things 😓
was i stupid to love you?
★ : summary :: when he downplays your feelings ★ : feat :: max verstappen, lewis hamilton, carlos sainz, charles leclerc, lando norris ★ : genre :: angst; hurt/comfort ★ : word count :: 4.6k ★ : a/n :: open ending, don't forget to vote after so i can get a bit of feedback :3 kinda rushed so might contain lots of typos sorryyyy!!
( part 1 )
Charles Leclerc
The house party buzzed with music and laughter, a cacophony that drowned your thoughts as you stormed through the crowded rooms. Your heart raced with a mix of anger and hurt, knowing Charles was right on your tail, determined to catch you before you could reach Arthur.
Your boyfriend’s hand wrapped around yours just as his brother turned around to look at you guys. You stomped your feet as you shook your head to dismiss Arthur and follow your boyfriend who quietly kissed your head in gratitude before you could step away.
”What is going on with you?!” Your voice trembled with barely contained fury as you confronted Charles in a quieter corner.
Charles sighed, his brow furrowing in frustration. ”I don’t know, baby. I’m so sorry—”
”You told me off when you should know that I’m right!” Your voice rose involuntarily. ”She fucking leaned in thinking that you were gonna choose her.”
”Y/N, please listen to me,” Charles said earnestly, stepping closer to you. ”I messed up. I know. But I would, never in a hundred years, choose anyone let alone her over you.”
You looked into Charles' eyes, seeing the sincerity and pain reflected in them. Your anger began to melt, replaced by a swirl of conflicting emotions.
”You’re just saying what I want to hear and I don't like it,” you said, your voice softer now, searching for clarity.
”It’s the truth,” Charles declared, his voice tinged with regret. ”I know I’ve hurt you baby and I'm sorry for that but I can’t— I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if I watched you leave with my brother. Let me drop you home, okay?”
Tears welled up in your eyes, frustration and hurt mixing with the love you still felt for him. Charles gently took your hands in his, his touch warm and comforting.
”Y/N, please,” Charles pleaded, his voice raw with emotion. ”I never want to make you feel like you need to run away from me. I want to talk this out, please give me a chance to make things right.”
You hesitated, feeling torn between wanting to forgive him and the pain of betrayal still fresh in your heart.
”Okay,” you finally whispered, feeling emotionally drained. ”Let's go.”
Charles nodded, relief washing over his face. He led you out of the noisy party, his grip on your hand tight and reassuring. The cool night air outside provided a stark contrast to the heated emotions inside.
As Charles drove you home, neither of you spoke. The silence was filled with unspoken words and the weight of what had just transpired. But Charles kept stealing glances at you, his eyes full of regret and love.
When you arrived at your shared apartment, Charles parked the car but made no move to get out. He turned to you, his expression soft and vulnerable.
”I'll leave if you want me to,” Charles said quietly, his voice tinged with sorrow. ”But please, Y/N, give us a chance to talk tomorrow. I'll do whatever it takes to make this right.”
You looked at him, seeing the sincerity in his eyes and the love that still lingered despite everything. Tears fell down your cheeks as you nodded slowly.
”I need time,” you admitted softly, your voice barely audible. ”Time to sort through this.”
Charles nodded understandingly, reaching out to gently wipe away your tears. ”Take all the time you need,” he said softly, his thumb caressing your cheek. ”I'll be here, whenever you're ready.”
”Where will you go?” You asked, not wanting to leave just yet.
”To your brother’s house,” he joked and smiled cheekily when you let out a small laugh.
”I love you,” Charles continued and seemed satisfied when you saw your tinted cheeks, giving into the temptation to kiss your hand. ”I’ll stay at Arthur's for the night.”
With that, you stepped out of the car, your heart heavy with conflicting emotions. You watched Charles drive away, feeling the distance between you both but knowing that perhaps, with time, you could find a way back to each other.
Lando Norris
You sat in the break room at work, your lunch untouched in front of you. The memories of last night’s events still stung, the image of her hand on Lando’s thigh and the lipstick on his collar replaying in your mind.
Just as you were about to take a sip of water, the door swung open, and there he was, your— ex? —boyfriend, looking desperate and determined. You knew there was a possibility he’d try to catch you at work given that you’d taken away all other means.
”Y/N, can I please?” he said, his voice pleading as he pointed towards the hallway.
You nodded reluctantly and led him to an empty hall, away from prying eyes. The silence was deafening as you stood there, waiting for him to speak.
You nodded reluctantly and led him to an empty conference room, away from prying eyes. The silence was deafening as you stood there, waiting for him to speak.
”Y/N, please,” he started, his voice trembling slightly. ”I’m so sorry about last night.”
You crossed your arms, leaning against the table. ”Bet you had a good time, huh?”
”No, I didn't,” Lando said in disbelief before he took a deep breath, trying to keep his composure. ”Nothing that happened there was intentional. We were all drinking, and she... she got too close. I should have pushed her away. I’m sorry.”
You scoffed, anger bubbling up again, finally fired up enough to speak your mind. ”Her hand was on your fucking thigh, Lando. And your collar— her lipstick was all over it. How do you explain that?”
He winced, clearly pained by the memory. ”I know it looks bad, but it wasn’t what it seemed. She leaned in close to talk to me, and I didn’t realize she had left a mark. It was a— just a stupid mistake, and I should have been more aware.”
”More aware?” you echoed, your voice rising. ”You should have cared about how it would make me feel! Instead, you shrugged it off like it was nothing.”
”I didn’t mean to shrug it off,” he said, stepping closer. ”I was wrong. I should have reassured you, should have shown you that you’re the only one that matters to me. Baby, please just let me—”
You looked away, the pain still fresh. ”It’s not just about the lipstick or her hand. It’s about how you made me feel like I was overreacting, like my feelings didn’t matter.”
”They do matter,” he said, his voice breaking. ”More than anything. I was an idiot. I should have pushed her away immediately. I should have come to you and told you everything before you saw it for yourself.”
”You know I only want you,” he added softly, his eyes pleading with you.
You shook your head, trying to hold back tears. ”That’s the thing, Lando. I don’t know that. I actually believe that y— you don’t at all.”
Lando’s eyes filled with tears as a broken whisper of your name left his mouth. ”I h.. have never, I never will. Ever.” He stressed. ”Want anyone— need anyone the way I want you.”
You kept quiet as you looked at him trying to catch himself. Lending him your hand that he squeezed in return.
”I can’t believe you would ever believe that but I understand and, I promise… I’ll be more mindful, more respectful. I’ll make sure everyone knows I’m taken, that I’m yours. Please, give me a chance to make it right.”
The weight of his words hung in the air, and you let out a slow breath, trying to not have a breakdown at your workplace. ”It’s going to take time, Lando. Trust isn’t rebuilt overnight.”
”I know,” he said, relief washing over his features. ”And I’m willing to do whatever it takes. I’ll prove to you that I’m worthy of your trust.”
”Okay,” you whispered, your voice barely audible. ”I’ll give it a thought, Lando. But if you hurt me again, we’re done.”
”I understand,” he said, his voice filled with determination. ”Thank you, Y/N. I won’t let you down.”
Max Verstappen
The streets were bustling with late-night revelers, their laughter and chatter a stark contrast to the storm brewing inside you. The restaurant's neon sign flickered as you stepped out into the cool night air, your phone clenched tightly in your hand.
Three hours. You had waited for three hours, hoping Max would show up for your anniversary dinner, only to find out from the story of your mutual friend that he was out with her again.
On your anniversary.
You made your way through the crowded streets, not caring where you ended up. You just needed to get away, to think, to process the hurt and betrayal. Your phone buzzed incessantly in your pocket, but you ignored it. Max's calls and messages could wait. Right now, you needed space.
After wandering aimlessly for a while, you found yourself at the edge of the city, near the river. The quiet contrast of the flowing water was a welcome change from the city's noise. You sat on a bench, pulling your jacket tighter around you as a light drizzle began to fall. The soft patter of rain on the water's surface was soothing, but it didn’t dull the ache in your heart.
Minutes turned into an hour, and the rain intensified. Your phone buzzed again, and this time you glanced at it. Last message from Max was a minute ago
Max: Y/N, please. Where are you? Let me explain. I’m looking for you.
You sighed, wiping away the raindrops mixed with your tears. Your fingers hovered over the screen before you finally typed a reply.
You: By the river. Near the old bridge.
You didn’t know why you told him, but some part of you wanted to hear him out. To understand why he kept doing this. Why would he even waste time with you if he was already in love with someone else?
God. Even the thought of that brought up a real pain in your chest. The rain fell harder, and you huddled under the small awning of a nearby building, trying to stay somewhat dry.
After what felt like an eternity, you saw a figure running towards you through the rain. It was Max, drenched and breathless. He slowed as he approached, his eyes filled with worry and regret. HIs clothes were all over the place, untucked and wrinkled and you only drew the worst conclusion.
”Y/N,” he gasped, stopping a few feet away. ”Thank God, you're okay.”
You stood up, arms crossed defensively. ”You’ve got five minutes, Max. Make it count.”
He nodded, taking a step closer. ”I’m so sorry, Y/N. I know I’ve let you down. I was with her tonight because she’s going through a really rough time. She had no one else to turn to.”
You narrowed your eyes, the skepticism clear. ”On our anniversary? How convenient.”
He flinched at your tone but didn’t back down. ”I know it’s no excuse. I should have told you. I thought I could help her quickly and still make it to dinner. I didn’t realize it would take so long.”
You shook your head, the anger bubbling up again. ”This isn’t the first time, Max. How many times have I had to wonder if she’s really just a friend? How many times have you put her before me?”
Max stepped closer, his eyes pleading. ”I’ve been blind, Y/N. I didn’t see how much I was hurting you. There’s nothing romantic between us. She’s just a friend, and she needed my help. But I see now that I’ve been unfair to you.”
Tears mixed with the rain on your cheeks. ”I don’t know if I can keep doing this, Max. The constant worry, the feeling like I’m not enough. It’s tearing me apart.”
He reached out, tentatively taking your hand. ”You are more than enough, Y/N. I’ve been an idiot, and I’m so sorry. I love you, and I don’t want to lose you.”
You looked into his eyes, searching for any sign of deception. All you saw was sincerity and regret. ”How can I trust you again, Max? What did she even need help with?”
He squeezed your hand gently. ” She saw her ex at the club and he was being an asshole. I just went over for five to put him in his place when one of her friends posted the story. I’m sorry for the delay, baby. I know I should've been more transparent about everything. Just please, give me a chance to make things right.”
”Is she okay?” You took a shaky breath, your heart aching with the desire to believe him and he exhaled when you pulled him under the shit excuse of shelter you had from the rain.
”She’s okay. I promise I won't ever embarrass you this way again, baby. You won’t ever have to sit and wonder if I'm bailing because I found someone else or not.” Max took another deep breath. ”I never will, baby, you are the only one I want. I will never find anyone.”
You closed your eyes, the tears spilling over as you hugged him. ”I wanna go home.”
”Okay let’s go home, baby.” Max gently cupped your face, his thumbs brushing away your tears. ”But I need you to know. You are my priority, Y/N. I’ll never let you feel otherwise again. I love you more than anything, and I’ll spend every day proving it to you.”
You leaned into his touch, feeling a flicker of hope amidst the pain as you hugged him.
He sighed again, closing his eyes to soak in this. ”Happy anniversary, baby. I love you”
You pulled back slightly, looking up at him with a tired smile.
Carlos Sainz
Carlos's pleas had grown quieter, the urgency in his voice replaced with a softness that seemed to seep through the crack under the door.
You could hear his breath hitching, a clear sign that he was on the verge of breaking down himself. But you couldn’t get yourself to stand up as you sat on the bed, knees drawn to your chest, tears still streaming down your face as you tried to block out the sound.
”Y/N, please,” he choked out, and you could hear the tears in his voice now. ”I'm so sorry. I... I don't know what else to say. I can't lose you.”
The sincerity and raw emotion in his voice cut through you in a vicious manner, and against your better judgment, you found yourself getting up. You hesitated for a moment, your hand hovering over the doorknob, before finally opening the door just a crack.
Carlos was standing there, his eyes red and swollen from crying. When he saw you, a look of profound relief washed over his face. ”Thank you,” he whispered.
You stepped back, letting him in. He walked in slowly, as if afraid to invade your space, and you closed the door behind him. The silence was heavy, each second stretching into an eternity.
”I'm so sorry,” Carlos said again, his voice trembling. ”I swear, I didn't know she was going to kiss me. If I had known, I would have never invited her. I would never do anything to hurt you intentionally.”
You took a deep breath, trying to steady your own shaking voice. ”But you did invite her, Carlos. And I told you to cut her off so many times. Why didn't you listen?”
He ran a hand through his hair, looking utterly defeated. ”I thought... I thought we were just friends. I didn't realize she felt that way about me. And when she kissed me, I was so shocked. I— I froze. I'm an idiot. I should have pushed her away immediately.”
”You should have,” you echoed, your voice breaking as you recalled that scene and it felt like someone was physically stabbing you. ”Do you have any idea how much it hurt to see that?”
Carlos stepped closer, his eyes pleading. ”I know, and I'm so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you. I love you, Y/N. You're the only one I want to be with.”
You looked down, tears falling onto the floor. ”How do I know that, Carlos? How do I know you won't let this happen again?”
He gently took your hands in his, his touch warm and reassuring. ”Because I can’t ever go through this again. I don’t want to know what it feels like to almost lose you. I'll cut her off completely. I promise you, baby, just, anything— it will never happen again.”
You pulled your hands away, wrapping your arms around yourself protectively. ”It's not just about cutting her off, Carlos. I can never get that image out of my brain now. What if you just wake up tomorrow that you didn’t get rid of her because yo— you…?”
You trailed off but Carlos understood and immediately shook his head. ”No,” he said firmly. ”I will never wake up with anyone other than you in my heart. You’re the one I love, the one I am going to live my life with.”
He didn’t let you speak as he carried on,”I understand. Trust is earned, not given. And I'll do whatever it takes to earn it back. I'll prove to you that you can trust me.”
You sighed, feeling the weight of his words. ”I want to believe you. But it's going to take time. A lot of time.”
”I know,” he said softly. ”And I'm willing to wait. I'll wait as long as it takes for you to trust me again. Just please, don't shut me out. Let me be there for you.”
You looked into his eyes, seeing the genuine remorse and love in them. Despite everything, a part of you still loved him deeply. ”Okay,” you whispered. ”But you have to understand, it's going to be hard. I'm still hurt, and it's going to take a while for me to heal.”
Carlos nodded, a flicker of hope in his eyes. ”I'll be patient. I'll be here for you, no matter what. And I'll do everything I can to make it right.”
”Alright.” You nodded, feeling a glimmer of hope yourself. ”Just... don't make me regret it.”
”I won't,” Carlos stepped closer, tentatively reaching out to wipe a tear from your cheek. ”I love you, Y/N. More than anything.”
You gave him a small as you leaned into his touch, feeling a mix of emotions, ”I love you too, Carlos. That's why this hurts so much.”
He pulled you into a gentle hug, holding you as if you were the most precious thing in the world. ”We'll get through this. Together.”
Lewis Hamilton
You paced around your apartment, the anger and hurt from the argument still fresh. The silence after the exchange with Lewis was deafening. You couldn’t believe he said those things. Your phone buzzed on the couch, but you ignored it, needing space to process.
A knock on your door interrupted your thoughts. It was loud and persistent. You hesitated, hoping it wasn’t who you thought it was.
”Y/N, please open up. I need to talk to you,” Lewis’s voice came through the door, sounding desperate.
You took a deep breath and opened the door. Your boyfriend stood there, looking remorseful.
”What do you want, Lewis?” you asked, your voice cold.
”Can I come in? Please, we need to talk,” he pleaded.
You stepped aside reluctantly, letting him in. He walked into the living room, turning to face you with regret etched on his face.
”I’m sorry, Y/N,” he started, his voice soft as he ran a hand over his face. ”I didn’t mean what I said. I was frustrated— but that’s no excuse.”
”You really hurt me,” you said, crossing your arms defensively knowing you had to support yourself before you start crying again. ”And you were so fucking cruel about it!”
”I know, and I hate that I did that to you,” he replied, his eyes sincere. ”I’ve been spending too much time with her, and I’ve been blind to how it’s been affecting you— us. Affecting us.”
”Why do you keep seeing her then? If she’s just a friend, why does it feel like she’s more important than me?” you demanded, your voice shaking.
”She’s not more important than you,” he said quickly. ”I’ve let the boundaries blur, and I didn’t realize how much it was hurting you. I’m sorry.”
Tears welled up in your eyes, but you blinked them away. This was not what you expected. You were ready for a fight, sure that Lewis would come with his own weapons out but this was undoing you.
”It’s not just about her, Lewis. It’s about us. You’ve been distant, and I feel like I’m losing you.”
Lewis nodded, looking pained and sick. ”You’re not losing me, Y/N. I’ve been an idiot, and I’ve taken you for granted. I want to fix this.”
”How?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. Desperately clinging onto him to make amends because you couldn’t see any in hindsight.
”By being more present, by setting boundaries, and by showing you every day how much you mean to me,” he said, taking your hands in his. ”Please give me a chance to make this right.”
”Words aren’t enough anymore,” you said, looking down at your joined hands.
”I know,” he nodded. ”But I'm willing to go through any lengths, I’ll prove to you that you’re my priority.”
You searched his eyes, seeing the determination and regret. ”I want to trust you,” as your voice cracked, the very first tear fell down your face and Lewis immediately grabbed you as he pulled you to lay your head on his chest.
”I can’t though— I wish I could but I can't get hurt again.”
”I understand and I promise you can shoot me if I hurt you again” he said. ”I love you, Y/N. I’ll do whatever it takes to make this right.”
You leaned into his embrace, feeling a flicker of hope amidst the pain. ”I love you too.” You felt him take a sigh as he held you tight against his warm body.
”And I need you to understand that my feelings are valid,” you continued as you soaked his shirt with your tears. ”When I tell you something bothers me, I need you to listen and not dismiss it.”
”I promise I’ll listen,” he said, his voice full of sincerity. ”I’ll do better because losing you would end me.”
You took a deep breath, feeling a weight lift slightly. As you stood there in your boyfriend’s arms, you realized that healing would take time but there was no one else you would rather heal with. Though only time could tell what the future held for you.
Oscar Piastri
You closed your eyes as you heard the door of your best friend's apartment being knocked on again. Your mind was a whirlwind of emotions—anger, betrayal, sadness.
You replayed the messages over and over in your head, each one cutting deeper than the last as you contemplated whether letting Oscar in would be a good decision. You finally made the decision when you heard the neighbor’s lock moving.
You pulled him in before they could open their door or call the cops and finally took a look at him. He looked disheveled. His eyes were red from holding unshed tears as they glossed over once he finally took you in.
”Y/N,” Oscar started, moving towards you with open arms. ”Thanks for letting me in.”
”I almost didn't.” You crossed your arms over your chest, trying to keep your voice steady as you stepped away from his open arms. ”But you were waking up the whole damn building.”
Oscar nodded, looking down at the ground. ”I deserve that.” You took a deep breath, desperate to get this over with.
”Why, Oscar? Why did you lie to me?”
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. ”I... I was scared you'd get upset. I thought if I told you the truth, you'd leave me.”
”And now?” you scoffed, your voice rising. ”You think I'm not upset now? You think lying to me makes it any better?”
He stepped closer, his eyes pleading. ”Y/N, I made a mistake. A huge mistake. But nothing happened between me and her, I swear. We were drunk, and she sat on my lap for a picture. It was stupid and irresponsible, but that's all it was.”
You shook your head, tears welling up in your eyes. ”Do you have any idea how that made me feel? Seeing her on your lap after you told me she wasn't even going to be there?”
Oscar reached out to touch your arm, but you stepped back once again and his eyes brimmed with tears. ”Y/N, please. I love you. I was an idiot, but I love you. I need you to believe that.”
You wiped your eyes, trying to compose yourself. ”How can I believe you, Oscar? When I don't even know if you really want me?”
He swallowed hard, his tears finally falling out of his eyes. Oscar looked defeated as if he was fighting a battle already lost.
”Please don’t say that. You’re the only person I want. I'll do whatever it takes to earn your trust back. I'll never lie to you again. I'll be completely honest, even if it's something I think will hurt you. Just... please give me a chance to make it right.”
You looked at him, searching his face for any sign of deception. You saw only earnest regret and a desperate longing for forgiveness. You wanted to believe him, but the hurt was still so raw.
”I don't know if I can,” you whispered. ”You've broken my trust, Oscar. And that's not something you can just fix with words.”
He nodded slowly. ”I know. But I'm willing to do whatever it takes. I'll go to counseling, I'll give you access to my phone, my social media, anything you need to feel secure. Just please, don’t give up on us.”
You stood in silence for a moment, the weight of the situation heavy in the air. You looked around the dimly lit apartment, as you took a deep breath, trying to gather your thoughts.
”Okay,” you said finally. ”I’m willing to discuss this in the morning. But if you lie to me again, if you hurt me again, we're done. Do you understand?”
Oscar's face lit up with a mixture of relief and determination as his chest heaved. ”I understand. I promise you, Y/N, I'll never give you a reason to doubt me again.”
You nodded, as your lips quivered. ”I hope so. Because I don't think I can go through this again.”
He stepped closer, cautiously taking your hand. You allowed it, feeling the warmth of his touch. ”Thank you,” he said softly. ”I won't let you down.”
You stood together, still holding hands. The silence between you was different now—tentative, but with a flicker of understanding. You had a long way to go, but for the first time since those fateful messages, you felt like maybe, just maybe, not all was lost.
( writing masterlist \ main masterlist \ drop a request ) ©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.
#★ : my work !#f1 x reader#formula 1 x reader#formula one x reader#formula 1#f1#f1 fanfic#formula 1 fanfic#f1 imagine#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc fanfic#max verstappen#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen fanfic#lando norris#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#lando norris fanfic#lewis hamilton#lewis hamilton x reader#lewis hamilton imagine#carlos sainz#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz imagine#f1 angst#f1 fluff#hurt/comfort
1K notes
·
View notes
Note
HERE TO SEND YOU BLUELOCK HEAD CANNONS! >:D
Can you do headcannons of the guys and how they would be like if they were teaching us how to play soccer? Hope this is interesting for you ^^, if you're interested to make them thanks in advance!
TEACHING YOU SOCCER?!
featuring: michael kaiser. itoshi rin. oliver aiku. isagi yoichi. bachira meguru.
n. yees darling, i was invested to write this (it's a challenging one because i don't really play soccer myself). hope i nailed it though, thank you to u too <3
MICHAEL KAISER. "nice shot!" kaiser exclaimed, clapping you on the back. "but don't get too cocky, mein liebling."
"learned from the best, i guess," you teased, nodding toward kaiser. "after all, my boyfriend's the world's number one striker, hmm?"
kaiser's eyes widened in mock surprise, a beam spreading across his face. "well, when you put it that way," he said, puffing out his chest with pride and sliding back his golden locks. "i suppose i am pretty amazing."
"ah, but if i'm the world's number one striker," he continued, trying to tease you with words, "then that must mean you have to kneel before me, right?"
you lifted an eyebrow, unable to stop snickering at his exaggerated claim. "huh, is that so?" playing along with his joke. "i guess i'll have to remember to bow down to the soccer king himself."
the guy grinned, clearly enjoying the playful exchange. "that's more like it," now his voice filled with mock superiority, typical kaiser. "but don't worry, i'll be a generous king."
ITOSHI RIN. "fine, i'll try my best, but just so you know, i'm not really good at teaching," rin confessed, feeling apologetic because he’s not used to teaching others. and now, his girlfriend wants to learn how to play soccer.
rin took a deep breath, trying to muster up some confidence as he began to explain the basics of dribbling. "uh, alright, first, dribbling. just try to keep the ball close to your feet for now," he instructed, a bit hesitant.
"oi, dont look at me, look at the ball," he reminded you. "sorry," you chuckled, truly didn't realize you weren't paying attention. come on, just look at him. "if i’m being honest, you look really hot like this," you teased, but, it’s true though!
rin's cheeks flushed slightly at your comment, but he quickly regained his composure. "focus," he replied. though there was a hint of annoyance, you couldn't help but sneak a glance at rin's face as he continued to give you instructions, his cheeks flushed slightly from your earlier comment.
suddenly, rin's voice broke through your reverie, snapping you back to reality. "i said focus!"
OLIVER AIKU. "keep your eye on the ball and follow through with your kick," aiku instructed while you attempted to pass the ball to him.
even when you struggled or made mistakes, aiku remained patient and supportive, offering gentle guidance to help you improve. "try to angle your foot a bit more next time," he suggested, as you missed the mark with your pass. "you're doing great, sweetie. just keep practicing."
by the end of the session, you were exhausted but thankful for aiku's patience and support. he wrapped his arm around your shoulders, a proud smile on his lips.
"you're making progress, sweetie," he soothed, genuine and affectionate. "with a little more practice, you'll beat me out here."
BACHIRA MEGURU. "okaaay, let's start with some dribbling drills," he said, bachira was overjoyed since this meant he had another friend to play soccer with. "try to keep the ball under control as you move around me, kaay?"
you nodded, determined to give it your best shot. as you began to dribble the ball, you stumbled a bit, but bachira was quick to offer a push. "nice job, baby! you're getting the hang of it," he cheered, clapping his hands in support.
with each effort, you gained confidence and dribbled past bachira with greater ease. bachira congratulated you on your small wins every time you successfully escaped him. "woah, that was awesome! baby, i’m so happy!" he exclaimed, giving you a high-five.
"great effort, babes! keep it up, and you'll get it," he encouraged, his words filling you with determination. “lets keep playing together!”
ISAGI YOICHI. "hey, it's okay," isagi said gently, stepping closer to you. "here, let me show you."
he moved behind you and gently guided your legs into the correct position, his touch firm yet gentle. "see? keep your body low and your touches light," he explained, moving your legs in rhythm with the ball. "you've got this, angel.”
with isagi's guidance, you began to feel more confident, dribbling the ball with increasing control. whenever you made a mistake, your boyfriend always offered gentle correction and encouragement.
"nice try, but try to keep the ball closer to your feet," he would say, his tone encouraging. "like this," demonstrating the correct form before guiding your legs to mimic his movements.
@uzurakis
#.writing#blue lock#blue lock fluff#blue lock x reader#blue lock x y/n#bllk x reader#bllk scenarios#bllk x you#bllk rin itoshi#rin itoshi x reader#itoshi rin x reader#rin x reader#bllk kaiser#kaiser x reader#michael kaiser x reader#blue lock kaiser#oliver aiku#blue lock oliver#bllk oliver#oliver aiku x reader#bachira meguru#bllk bachira#bachira x reader#bachira meguru x reader#isagi yoichi#blue lock isagi#isagi yoichi x reader#isagi x reader#blue lock michael kaiser
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
THE COMMISSION PT. 2 | SEVIKA X READER | ARCANE
You can find part one here.
Part three here.
Synopsis: You've been her personal mechanic for two years, but your growing reputation in the field has earned you dozens of clients and commissions. Sevika was looking for something fresh, durable and of good quality, and when it came to her sexual appetite, she only accepted the best. So she turned to you for a special commission.
Contains: arcane!sevika, feminine reader, lesbians, lots of dialogues, arcane universe, cannon sevika, mechanic!reader, wlw, slow burn baby 💋, several parts btw
Word count: 2,330
Note: English is not my first language, so I apologize in advance for any mistake in my writing. Enjoy!
Sevika trusted your good work but your integrity mattered to her as well. The intimidating facade, her bearing and her gaze made her look lethal, but the truth was that Sevika protected the people she cared about and was extremely loyal. After years working for Silco and cleaning up Jinx's messes, Sevika had developed a special fondness for you and your good humor, as well as your eyes and your easy smile. She wanted to protect you for this commission as well.
A couple of days after the meeting, you were outside The Last Drop, waiting for Sevika while smoking a cigarette. "What did I get myself into." you whispered, exhaling before stepping on the butt with your heel, watching the woman approach from the distance. Next to her was one of her lackeys and another man you didn't know, a tall, dark-haired man with slanted eyes, veiny hands and good-looking, presumably a worker at the House of Pleasure. The candidate.
She gestured for the man next to her to approach and spoke up. "I want you to meet my friend, Silas." Sevika said, her voice a little gruff. "He's here to... provide for your mold-taking."
Gosh, this so embarrassing you thought, giving Silas a nod. "Nice to meet you, I assume Sevika explained you the uh... reason you're here."
Silas nodded, still smirking. "She did." He replied, his eyes roaming over you. "And it's a pleasure, lovely."
"Huh, sure." you mumbled, as Sevika made her way into the Last Drop, towards her personal room. The place was set up. Sevika took care of your requests and had a powerful spotlight installed in the center of the room, next to a backless chair and a work table, where the materials to make the mold were spread out and ready to be used. Sevika sat on the couch, lighting a cigarette while Silas undressed from the waist down. You focused on preparing the mixture, ignoring the blush on your cheeks at the rather peculiar and embarrassing situation you found yourself in.
"Robin asked about you." Silas said to Sevika. "You haven't visited her in a while..."
"Yeah, I've been busy." She replied gruffly. "With... business and such."
"You sure you haven't found another girl?" asked Silas. "It's quite odd to not see you around the brothel."
"I've been..." She paused, her gaze shifting briefly between you and the supplies on the table. "...busy. I don't have time for that right now." The truth was that, recently, her visits to the brothels of Zaun had decreased. The reason was sitting not ten feet away from her.
You gulped. "Please stand in front of the spotlight, legs apart." you said somewhat shyly, to which Silas complied with a rather pleasant and welcomed confidence. He certainly wasn't embarrassed, but you were. "Oh, I'm sorry to be so blunt but... you must be..."
"Hard?" Silas asked, to which you nodded.
Sevika chuckled, watching the interaction. She was amused by your attempts to be professional, trying your best to handle this with grace despite your embarrassment. "Don't apologize." He said, a hint of amusement in his voice. "It's a reasonable request."
You looked at Sevika with pink cheeks, before she turned to Silas in a non-serious tone. "Do you need magazines or something for the imagination, Silas?" she asked.
Silas chuckled, his eyes moving between Sevika and you. "No, I think I'll be alright." he said "But I wouldn't mind a little assistance..." He added, his eyes slowly roving over you, a smirk on his face.
Sevika's gaze was firm as she looked up at Silas, her voice cold. "Hands off, or I'll cut them off."
Sevika handed him the pills and a bottle of water. It only took a couple of minutes for Silas to be rock hard after taking them. Not that you found him appealing, but the man’s sexual aura stirred something inside you. However, you were here to work and Sevika would certainly disapprove of anyone putting their hands on you or you putting your hands on someone else. Sevika watched the whole process, focusing on the gentleness of your hands, the way you immersed the candidate's phallus in a container with the hypoallergenic plaster and the shy smile that were drawn on your lips while you took the time for it to harden. She thought about the privilege Silas was receiving, to have your complete and undivided attention on his body and to be touched by such angelic hands. Sevika grunted, pouring herself a whiskey.
"And... done." you said after the time passed. You removed the now hardened mold, satisfied with the result. You carefully placed it on the table, while Silas got dressed.
"I know I have a good cock, but I never thought I was worthy of being turned into a mold," the man joked.
Sevika chuckled, taking another puff of her cigarette. "Don't flatter yourself, sweetcheeks. We just needed someone qualified."
"Whatever you say, boss." He replied, his gaze shifting to you. "How long will it take for the final product?"
"Four to six days," you replied. "The material I'll be using is quite sensitive and capricious, plus incorporating the Shimmer system will take a couple of failed experiments," you explained, to which Silas laughed.
"Shimmer?" he asked, looking at Sevika. "You're planning on making a fucking Shimmer strap?"
Sevika leaned back, her expression cool. "Problem?"
"No, no problem. I'm just... curious. You never fail to surprise me, you know that?"
Silas gave her hand a squeeze. "I'm leaving now. Good luck with your little toy," Silas said, giving you a warm smile. You were focused on the mold when you and Sevika ended up alone in the room.
"You handled that well." She commented, her voice low and gruff.
"You think so?"
"Yeah, I do." She replied, exhaling a plume of smoke. "You managed to keep your focus and didn't let that hothead get to you."
“I know my job and what it’s worth,” you assured as you poured the second mixture into the cast to make the mold you’d be working with later. You were tired, however, this time of year people usually got their prosthetics renewed and everyone turned to you to do it. You’ve been using Shimmer again to keep the workflow going and it was starting to show.
Her sharp eye was trained to pick up on even the smallest details, and it was clear that you were exhausted. "When was the last time you slept a full night?
"Does it matter?" you inquired, focused on your work
"Of course it matters." She replied, her voice firm. "If you're exhausted, it will affect your work. I need you to be sharp, to be able to keep up."
"When's the last time you slept, really?"
"Mhm... two days ago?" you said, not sure. The truth is that Shimmer affected your perception of time and hunger, it was as effective as cocaine but more accessible, since it was Sevika who provided you with doses at a good price. However, she was regretting having done it, seeing you in this state.
"Are you kidding me? How many boosters have you taken in that time?"
"Don't remember." you shrugged. "I'm overflowed."
Sevika's jaw tensed as she watched your tired, sluggish state. The realization of what you'd been doing to yourself hit her like a ton of bricks. She put the cigarette away, standing up. "You're not going home. You're staying here." She said firmly, her voice leaving no room for argument. "I won't have you passing out from exhaustion."
"Excuse me?"
Her voice took on a softer tone, but her eyes held a hint of command. "I won't negotiate on this. It's for your own good."
"I have more comissions waiting for me at my workshop." you insisted. "And I can't afford to deliver them late."
She leaned forward, her voice dropping lower. "Those orders can wait. Your health cannot. I won't take no for an answer on this, understand?"
“How bold of you,” you scoff. “You’re asking me to rest when you’ve asked me for one of the strangest and most complex commissions this month.”
"And you took the commission, didn't you?" She retorted, her voice cold. "You agreed to it willingly. Don't act like I forced it upon you."
Before you could protest, Sevika's metal hand covered yours and she lowered herself to your level to say, leaving no room for argument: "You will quit work for today, I will get you dinner and you will go to sleep. Do you hear?"
You'd never seen Sevika this protective, this... bossy before. And honestly? It was kind of attractive. Her dominant aura was on full display, and the way she left no room for argument was both intimidating and thrilling.
"I hear," you managed to reply, your voice a breathless whisper.
Twenty minutes later, you popped a piece of turkey into your mouth, Sevika had brought you dinner and a glass of lemonade to go with your meal, as she watched you eat, she poured herself a cup of tea. She had had enough to drink for the day. By the second or third bite, you sensed the sudden comedown and felt nauseous. The shimmer was wearing off and Sevika was quick enough to kick the wastebasket towards you so you could throw up in it.
She moved quickly, resting a hand on your back as you wretched, attempting to provide some form of comfort. "Easy," she said quietly, rubbing slow, soothing circles on your back. "Just get it out."
The Shimmer comedown wasn't pleasant, it felt like all your energy was suddenly drained and replaced by an overwhelming feeling of malaise and despair. Your body was begging for more, and it was precisely that feeling that pushed people to buy more doses until they were in misery, but Sevika wouldn't allow it. Not when it comes to you. "It'll pass," she murmured quietly, her voice a soothing murmur. "Just breathe. It'll pass."
"Another one won't kill me..." you slurred with your head buried into the basket.
"That's where you're wrong," she replied, her voice firm. "It won't stop at just one. It never does. Especially not when you're already in this state."
Sevika straightened you up, handing you a bottle to rinse your mouth out. She then slid the plate over to you. "Eat."
"I don't..."
"I know you don't feel like it." She admitted, her voice softer now, "but you need to eat something. You haven't been taking proper care of yourself, and it shows."
You forced yourself to eat and drink the lemonade. Soon enough you were lying on the soft sofa in the room. Its walls were dark and seemed stained by the passing of time and cigarette smoke, it was lit by lamps in red and mustard tones. In the distance was the betting table, next to you the minibar and in front of you, sitting on a chair, Sevika was watching you. The withdrawal effect had already worn off, now you were just very sleepy.
"Are you feeling any better?"
"I'm... I wanna sleep." you slurred.
She took another puff of her cigarette, tapping the ash into the ashtray beside her. "Close your eyes. Sleep."
You clossed your eyes, the smell of the cigarette entering your nostrils. "You shouldn't smoke that much." you mumbled.
"Oh, really?" She replied, a hint of playful sarcasm in her voice. "And who's gonna stop me?" She took another long puff of her cigarette, the smoke wafting towards you, the scent musky and alluring. "You, perhaps?"
"I don't have any power over you." you admitted.
"No, you don't." She agreed, her expression softening slightly. "But," she mused quietly, her voice barely above a whisper, "sometimes, I wish you did."
You didn't know what to make of that, but you understood that Sevika wasn't joking. You felt a hand on your forehead, Sevika checking if you were feverish or cold, and luckily for you, you were fine. You shifted on the couch, before your curiosity got the better of you. "Silas said you've barely been to the brothel lately..."
"Are you concerned for my wellbeing?" She asked, her voice laced with a hint of sarcasm. "Or are you simply curious?"
"You're a woman of habits and you're missing that one."
"Yes, I suppose I am a woman of habits." She leaned back in her chair, her eyes still fixed on you. "And that one habit in particular... I've been avoiding it."
"Why?"
"It's... not as satisfying as it once was." She replied, her voice quiet, almost lost. "The same faces, the same encounters, the same routines. It's all... so hollow, now. Empty. Meaningless."
Suddenly you felt that the commission you're working on was meaningless. "Then why the hell am I fabricating a strap for you?" you asked with sleepy amusement.
"What do you mean 'why'?" She retorted, her tone sharp. "Because I asked you to, that's why."
"But you're saying you don't like to attend the brothel anymore." you inisisted. "Who will you use it with then?"
"I'll use it with whoever I damn well please," she continued, her tone growing sharper, "and it's none of your business who that is."
You noticed her tone change, she was closing up and it was best not to probe further. Not with Sevika. You simply nodded, closing your eyes against the potent spell of Shimmer's downturn and the days and days of work taking its toll on your body.
You felt her scent close by, a warm hand on your forehead and then tracing circles on your hair. You thought you were dreaming, or it was just the Shimmer messing with your mind, but you felt like you were in some kind of enchantment with those fingers massaging your scalp and the weight of her body next to you on the couch. "Get some sleep," she said quietly, her voice gentle. "I'll be here when you wake up."
To be continued...
taglist: @lez-zuha @amoraeu @nikaachuuuu @furrytaesss @elliecoochieeater @n-noctiss @emmanetalias
#arcane#arcane fanfic#league of legends#sevika x you#sevika arcane#arcane sevika#sevika x y/n#sevika x reader#sevika
566 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hello! I'm not sure if i'm the one but can we get some more Mavuika x Creator! Reader (gender neutral) in which the creator is falling deeply in love with Mavuika and the creator is slowly getting his/hers/their memories back and awakening a little bit of power (like maybe aweking some unique element or getting better healing abilities) ?
I'm pretty sure you were the one yea. Sorry for not answering sooner I just had no motivation to write 😭
Synopsis: your time with Mavuika! (And "your" past) part 1 part 2 part 4
TW: slight angst, fluff, OOC, arguements, reader is referred to as they/them for easier use but gender is up to what you interpret as, bad writing, bad grammar, english is not my first language, slightly rushed at the end, not proofread
Characters: Mavuika x gn!creator!reader
"Please don't walk through the halls, our Archon is busy-"
"I just have a word with her, that's all."
The receptionist sighed as you glared at her and walked off. You've had a bad week, constantly getting excruciatingly painful headaches and nightmares which make you wake up in a cold sweat. What made it worse that you couldn't really remember them when you woke up, which made it all the more frustrating. That, along with the fact that your boss was giving you more work than usual was making you snappy and irritated all the time. The even more strange thing was the fact that you were seeking out Mavuika, almost as if she was a pinicle of warmth in a snowy wasteland, so you did eventually visit her.
As you reached her office door, gloved hands gently pushed it open to see her inside. Your eyes softened, and you could feel your stress slipping away. She was sleeping though, her head on a pile of documents.
"That's.. Strange. Normally she would spend a lot of time with me, did she ignore all this work just for me?" You thought to yourself. However, instead of peaking over, you decided to sit in a sofa next to her table.
Curiosity did get the better of you though.
You skipped over to her desk and found loads of papers from different nations, which was really strange considering Mavuika was more busy dealing with Natlan's problems. You picked up a few documents and read them, cringing at the insignia of the other nations.
As you kept reading, you got more confused, and certainly more angry.
"Death threats, intimidation and war threats to Natlan, and Sumeru is asking for an alliance? What the hell is going on?!" You exclaimed, not noticing how Mavuika woke up. As you were about to read more, she snatched the papers from you, and looked at you with an expression you couldn't read.
"You weren't supposed to see that."
"Well I did, too bad. Now mind explaining what the hell is this?"
She didn't answer, and you felt your patience running thin. You didn't want to raise your voice at her, but the frustration of her not telling you was too much to handle. Still, you managed to control yourself, taking deep breaths.
"I'm not going to repeat myself, what is this?"
She paused, and for a moment, she contemplated whether she would tell you or not. Guilt was on her face, yet she finally told you.
"The other nations want you back for whatever reason, and they are threatening to add more to Natlan's plate by instituting a war. Sumeru is offering to help, but that's the only consolation I have," she breathed out. Your eyes softened, and your lips trembled. Seeing Mavuika like this was making you feel negative, especially since it was about you.
You picked up her hand and held it gently, but it was also firm. You didn't know what you could really do to help, considering that you were the one that they were after.
"Listen Mavuika, I am your creator, so I should have the right to know about all this, no? I may not be strong, but it's not like I'm completely useless," you held her hand against your forehead, both of you looking away from each other.
Feeling the need to lighten her pile of work, you let her go for a moment, going up to her desk and setting up the documents. You didn't look at her, nor did she look at you.
"I'll help," you spoke up.
"You don't need to."
"I insist."
She sighed, yet reluctantly went up to you to do the same. She knew that you wouldn't really change your mind, so there was really no point in arguing any further.
For the past couple of weeks, you were there to help Mavuika. You were always at her beck and call, skipping your work to help with hers. The only thing you did however was confiscate useless documents, sign the ones that she couldn't, and carry piles of work to warehouses.
As you were walking through the place, whistling to yourself, you realized that you had just passed the place that you were supposed to be in. Noticing your mistake, you ran to that place in exasperation, not noticing how a gust of wind helped you to run faster..
"Why do I keep forgetting this shit?.." You rubbed your temples, setting the box down. Looking at all the shelves, you deadpanned at the realization that the shelves were much higher than you anticipated.
"I should've brought a ladder.." You mumbled.
Then suddenly, without any explanation, a pillar of Geo helped you up, slowly rising to the shelves. The revelation almost made you scream, but you kept it in. You were really high up, and the fact that you didn't know what was happening made it even more terrifying. Was this Zhongli's doing? To taunt you before he came to hunt you again? You couldn't really tell, the only thought running in your head was how the hell would you get down.
The even stranger thing that happened was that a gust of wind separated the boxes and placed the one that you brought without you needing to use your hands. It might've been the Anemo Archon, but the fact that if it was, he would probably not help you with anything. He would most likely make you fall instead, taunting you like Zhongli. But it didn't really make any sense. How the hell would they even reach you all the way from Natlan?
As the pillar mounted you down, you were about to run to reach Mavuika, but your temperature rose uncomfortably high, which was very unusual. The sudden change made you collapse onto the ground, golden blood seeping out of your nose. You felt yourself getting light headed as you struggled to keep yourself awake.
"Not now god dammit!" You exclaimed in your head as your vision turned blank, losing your consciousness.
....
Where were you?
You held your head, groaning at the painful sensation. You got a clearer look at your surroundings, notifying you that you weren't in Natlan. No, this place was nothing like Natlan. It was more regal, the entire place being covered by intricate gold designs. You explored the place for a bit, still trying to figure out what happened.
You walked around, then suddenly, you saw a projection in front of you. Okay, it at least confirmed that you were in a dream. But when the projection finished appearing, you saw someone whom you didn't expect to see.
It was... Nahida?
"Greetings your grace," she bowed, and you just told her to stand back up.
"Kusanali? What are you doing here?" You raised an eyebrow. Seriously today was one of the most craziest days of your life, more than when you realized that you were in the Genshin world.
"I have been trying to speak with you, your grace. It was very hard, I admit, and I may or may not have caused those nightmares, I am really sorry about that." Oh, so that's why these horrible dreams happened, and why you couldn't remember them. You smiled awkwardly, knowing that you would forgive her anyway. After all, she was the first to actually help you in this world.
"What did you need to speak with me for?" You asked.
"It's about the other nations, I want to inform you that they are currently on the hunt for you, and want you back into the position of creator," she answered, and now there were even more questions in your head. What was the strange switch up for?
"But I must ask your grace, is this what you really dream of, your throne room?" She pointed at the giant throne at the back, and you quickly went to answer.
"No, I don't dream about anything like this," you replied back in confusion. Right, was this supposed to be normal?
When you turned around to ask Nahida a question again, she was gone. Was she hiding? No, she was completely gone, you couldn't feel her presence any where, almost as if she was forced out of your dream.
You looked around more and more, only to realize that there was a carbon copy of you on the throne.
They looked exactly like you, except more regal, and more intimidating than what you could ever be. However, you did notice that they were... Crying? Tears were definitely spilling out of her eyes, yet their expression stayed the same.
Yea this was weird.
You looked around again to see the Archons behind you. You flinched at the sight, however, they weren't looking at you, rather they were looking at what you could assume to be the previous creator. Their expression was one of pity, and in almost half a second, they attacked the creator. Yet that "you" didn't move a muscle, allowing them to get a hit. As you stared at the throne, there was golden blood seeping out, yet the creator was as hard as stone.
They had sealed the creator.
....
You woke up with a gasp, feeling sweaty and uncomfortable. Looking at your hands, you saw they were trembling. Your throat felt dry, way too dry for your liking. As you reached out for the nearest liquid next to you, your hands landed on a cup of tea, which you picked up and drank immediately. You calmed down a bit, reminiscing on what you just experienced.
"So that's what happened, I wonder why.." You mumbled. You finally payed attention to where you were, and saw that you were back in Mavuika's office. Huh, you didn't remember being here last.
Finally paying attention to what was next to you, you saw a tray on a stool, and some food on it. The tea you drank just now was probably from that tray.
Your eyes wandered, and it stumbled upon Mavuika. She was on a chair too, yet she was sleeping, her arms crossed. As multiple ideas went through your head, it finally clicked.
"Was she taking care of me?" You thought, yet you were too much in a trance to wake her up and ask her. Your cheeks were flushed, and you felt them getting warmer.
You wondered what this feeling was, the way your heart started beating faster and how you felt all giddy inside.
"Ah whatever, I'll figure it out soon," you muttered, oblivious to your own feelings.
Sorry I didn't include the abilities part too much, I was more focused on the creator and Mavuika's relationship 😓
#reader insert#genshin impact#genshin x reader#yandere genshin impact#yandere genshin x reader#yandere sagau#sagau x reader#genshin impact sagau#genshin sagau#sagau cult au#imposter sagau#sagau impostor au#sagau#mavuika x reader
757 notes
·
View notes