#i'm so tired of reading posts that take criticism as if it were an attack on the cr crew or something

[nezumidou]

Let people be disappointed.

Let them complain on their personal blogs and share opinions about the show they took the time to watch as everyone else.

(And if they only have praise, that's fine too.)

That's what fandom is all about.

How boring not to be able to dissect a piece of media and exchange different perspectives.

Every piece of criticism and praise comes from a place of respect and admiration for Critical Role and their stories. Whether it's love for the source material, the characters (or NPCs), the cast, etc.

No one would take the time to comment on something that means nothing to them.

Being disappointed in some aspects of TLOVM (to a greater or lesser extent) isn't a bad thing, it means someone cares.

[multifandomhaven]

Part II

TW: Mentions of animal neglect/abuse (nothing violent or descriptive - my heart can't take it). Also, I'm trying to get this as close to reality as possible, but I am in no way a doctor/veterinarian. Please, please, please don't use this as a guide for helping any animal.

I proofread this as best as I could (it's cross-posted as a fanfic so I changed MC's name to Y/N) so there might be an inconsistency(ies?) that I missed!

Y/N woke to the trilling song of a blue jay that had nested on the ledge of her window. The smooth chirps and whistles provided her a sense of peace, for when she heard it she knew she was safe in her cozy apartment. Standing on her toes she peeked into the ledge outside her window, as she did every morning, eagerly awaiting the small, blue eggs to hatch.

She yawned and stretched, rising from her bed. She straightened her t-shirt as best she could - there was no hope for the wrinkles. After she brushed her teeth and slipped on her fuzzy slippers she closed the bedroom door behind her. The warm, morning light streamed through the window by her barely-ever-used dining table.

She poured herself a bowl of cereal and sat down, pulling her laptop out to begin her day. There was an email from Mari, her favorite tech.

I know you're on leave and I'm not supposed to bother you, but we've got a cat and it's not looking good for him. A black and white stray, male. He looks like he's been through the wringer, Y/N. Animal control brought him in, and found him in a dumpster.

Y/N reread the email a few times before she clicked the attached video. The cat, obviously malnourished, bared its teeth and hissed at the person behind the camera, but didn't try to defend himself. He was tired, scared, and very sick.

Y/N frowned around her bite of food, her fingers darting over the keyboard as she typed out her response.

Give me an hour.

"Morning," John crooned from the doorway, his voice still thick with sleep. Y/N glanced up noting that he was already dressed and ready for the day. She gave him a small, forced smile as she read the email Mari sent back - saying that they'd be waiting for her.

Y/N sighed softly, her eyes drifting from her screen to John's eyes.

"What is it?" John asked.

Y/N's frown deepened and she placed her computer on the table. "I got an email saying that we have an abused animal at the office. I need to go make sure he's okay - see if he can be rehabilitated or if he needs to..." she trailed off, not wanting to finish the sentence. Of course, she'd had many animals that she'd had to put to sleep, but never did it get any easier, "rest."

"You've not been cleared to go back to the office," John reminded her stiffly. "You're still healing, and we've yet to find who ordered the attack on you."

"I can't let him suffer if he doesn't have a chance of making it," Y/N argued, her brows furrowed. "I won't stay, I swear. I'll assess him, see what needs to be done, and come home."

John sighed deeply and stared at her as if he were weighing her words, and then gave a single nod. "Only him."

A little while later, when they arrived at the office, Y/N was taken back to where the bi-colored cat lay. He was sedated, and connected to a drip to give him a little extra hydration. Tears burned her eyes and she sniffed, trying to contain them as she looked over the animal - he was thin, critically so. His fur was faded-looking and dirty. One of the techs was cleaning and wrapping a wound on his back leg.

"He was found in a dumpster," Mari reiterated from over her shoulder. Y/N noticed how the tech's gaze settled on her own still-healing bruised eye, but she ignored it. Mari didn't comment on it, instead, she continued to fill her in on the cat's condition. "He's a little on the wild side, Doc."

Y/N nodded as she listened, her heart squeezed in her chest. She couldn't help but feel like it was destiny that brought this creature to her at this exact moment. She took a deep breath to settle her emotions. "He needs a high-protein, high-fat diet supplemented with some vitamins for a few weeks." She ran her hand through his fur softly, her fingers roving over every one of his pronounced ribs. "But, all things considered, he seems like he'd be okay to be fostered."

Mari nodded, writing in his chart. "Okay. Have you heard from any of our fosters? Know anyone who's able to take him in?"

"Yeah," Y/N said softly, her eyes flicking from the cat to John, who stood out of the way in the back of the room, but always watching. She gently stroked the cat's side and looked back down at him sadly. "I'm gonna take him home with me. Get him fed and tamed down a bit. We can give this guy a new life, I'm sure of it."

"Y/N." Mari furrowed her brows. "Are you sure? I know you have a lot going on right now..."

Y/N tore her eyes from the cat, pinning Mari with a look. "I'm taking him with me. Find a carrier and a cone while I prepare him for the ride."

"Okay, okay..." Mari sighed, obviously wanting to protest, but she kept it to herself.

Y/N carefully took the IV out of the cat's leg and bandaged it as gently as she could. It was just Y/N and John in the room now. Y/N allowed her shoulders to fall as she looked back down at the battered creature on the table. "Poor little guy."

John sighed and stepped fully into the room, his hands clasped behind his back. He was looking at her, concern clear on his face. "You sure about this?"

Y/N nodded and carefully wiped at her healing eye as tears threatened to fall. "I can handle it."

"I don't doubt it," John agreed softly, giving her upper arm a gentle squeeze. "You'll fix him up."

"Yeah," Y/N agreed quietly. "He'll be okay."

Later that evening Y/N sat on the sofa with John, both of them watching the crate the cat was in. He had begun to rouse, stretching and mewling as he looked around the new environment. Y/N smiled and moved to crouch in front of the crate. She knelt, smiling softly as the cat bared its teeth at her, hissing.

"You're okay, buddy," Y/N cooed softly. "You're safe."

Curled up in the back of the crate, the cat watched her. His large, green eyes were trained on her, his head followed her as she went to the kitchen and brought back some food for him. She opened the can up and put some of the medicine she'd gotten for him on top. The smell wrinkled Y/N's nose, but she stirred it up anyway.

She opened the door, not even flinching as the cat started hissing and swatting at her hand.

"Y/N," John warned her.

"He's just scared." She told him as she pushed the bowl closer to the cat. The cat sniffed as it caught a whiff of the food. She shut the door to the cage and sat back on her knees, watching him intently.

He kept his eyes on her as he ate quickly, mewling with every bite. Once he was done he went back to the corner of the crate and laid back down.

Y/N's heart broke as she watched him. She couldn't help but wonder if this poor creature had ever known love.

Days passed and little by little Y/N had managed to worm her way into the cat's heart. She had several scratches on her hands and a bite mark or two, but she didn't let it deter her. Instead, it made her want to work harder.

"Clover," she sang softly, opening the door to his crate. She placed his bowl of food outside the cage and sat beside it, watching as he slowly emerged. He looked around the room, spotting the litter box Y/N had put just off to the side. "Come on, buddy," she encouraged him gently.

She pushed the bowl just a bit closer to him, hoping to entice him. Wary, he inched closer, his eyes never leaving her. He bent down and began to lap up the food. Y/N held back the noise of happiness that worked its way up her throat. She bit back her smile and slowly reached out, gently stroking his back.

He startled and ran back into his crate.

"Okay, okay," Y/N cooed and held her hand up in defense. She stood quietly by the door and watched him creep back over to his food. She felt John's presence looming at her back.

"He's cross with you, isn't he?" John asked with a huff. "He hasn't looked away."

"Well, he didn't scratch or bite me this time," she reminds him with a huff of laughter. "That's a step in the right direction."

[mademoiselle-cookie]

This might sound creepy, but I somehow stumbled upon your older posts about Moriarty the Patriot and your criticisms of the series, and I’m really sorry about all the hate you’ve received for simply stating your opinion about a FICTIONAL work. Though I personally really like the series, I can definitely see eye to eye with some of your objections and it’s appalling that people are so sensitive to a mere difference of opinion about a work of fiction. For instance, the bit about the French Revolution really bothered me as well. Now I’m not French, so I don’t have the most informed opinion on this, but Robespierre was definitely not the sort of person anyone should glorify - the guy was a maniac. It’s really frustrating to see uninformed people continue to put him on a pedestal. Not to mention, the French Revolution bit is literally never brought up again lmao - like what was it even there for??

This is why I tend to keep my distance from fandom in general, it’s so much more peaceful this way. I hope you find some like minded fandom friends with whom fandom becomes a source of joy, like it’s supposed to be. Take care <3

It's not creepy at all, don't worry.

Honestly, the hate I get for my opinions on MTP was not really an issue. I had worse and my "attackers" were obviously young people. I remember being younger, I remember being stupid and too aggressive with different opinions than mine (I never harassed someone tho).

I will say bc it's important, but I will never judge someone for liking Moriarty The Patriot. I will never give you the side eye if it's your favorite (not like if it's Mushoku Tensei, I will judge you hard, but I will never review this thing bc I will never read it again). It has qualities that I am simply indifferent to.

I think the manga would have been a lot better if it was in a steampunk universe. The unrealistic moments, the exaggerated overcompetence of the main characters, their overdeveloped technology, the inacurate historical events... It would have not solved everything, but like this you can just change the logic and the history of your world. So the French Revolution could have happened however you want (as a French, it would have still pissed me off but It's a minor problem). And it would force the author to abandon this idea to represent the realist picture of the England of this time when they're not even trying.

I will continue my review of MTP until I'm tired of it. It could happen soon, I'm sick of the sexism.

Thanks for your kind ask!

[mint-yooxgi]

Está bien, voy a hablar en español porque si no no sé expresarme bien.

La persona que dijo que ese capítulo era "cringe" fue innecesariamente desagradable y maleducada, ahí no hay dudas.

Pero la forma en que respondisteis tanto tu como muchos otros seguidores estaba (en mi opinión) fuera de lugar. Se puede llamar la atención por un comportamiento sin llamar "hoe" a nadie.

Y seamos sinceros, sí que insinuaste que el motivo de ese mensaje era toda la discusión de las masterlist, y no que a "cringe anon" podría simplemente no hablerle gustado el capítulo. Así que ahí diste pie a que tiraran hate a otro autor. Está bien cometer errores, pero también debes saber aceptarlo y pedir disculpas cuando te equivoques.

Y por último (esto es una observación personal), siempre pides feedback cuando publicas algo, para lo cual estás en todo tu derecho. Pero el feedback es tanto positivo como negativo, también se debería dar una crítica constructiva sin miedo a que te ataquen por ello ni te acusen de tener otro motivo oculto para tener dicha opinión.

PD. You are very tallented but i think you are under a lot of stress, its okay to take a break and not answer while youre disturbed, and i mean that honestly im not saying it in a bitchy way

I'm providing a screenshot of the translation, as well as the copy-pasted version of the English translation down below so people can't keep coming back at me for 'mistranslating' something. This is getting way out of hand, and I'm tired of repeating myself and talking in circles.

Translation: Okay, I'm going to speak in Spanish because otherwise I won't know how to express myself well. The person who said that chapter was "cringe" was unnecessarily unpleasant and rude, there's no doubt about it. But the way you and many other followers responded was (in my opinion) out of line. You can get attention for a behavior without calling anyone a "hoe." And let's be honest, you did hint that the reason for that message was the whole masterlist discussion, and not that "cringe anon" might simply not like the chapter. So there you gave rise to another author being hated. It's okay to make mistakes, but you should also know how to accept it and apologize when you make a mistake. And lastly (this is a personal observation), you always ask for feedback when you publish something, which you have every right to do. But feedback is both positive and negative, constructive criticism should also be given without fear of being attacked for it or accused of having another ulterior motive for having that opinion.

I'm going to put my response under a read more, because this was a lot.

Okay, first things first. I would LOVE for you all to show me where I, emphasis on I, called anyone a "hoe". Because in my vivid recollection, and as you can see in this screenshot below. I, emphasis again on I, was called a "dumbass hoe always complaining."

I would literally LOVE to see exactly where I called someone a hoe. Please, point it out to me. Cause either I'm suffering from severe memory loss, or things are being wildly misinterpreted on someone else's part.

Also, please DO show me where I "gave rise to another author being hated". Cause, as far as I can tell, I never ONCE implied an author to be behind the 'cringe anon' ask. I recognize I got a few ASKS implying that, but at the end of the fucking day, MY followers were coming onto MY blog to defend ME from a fucking RUDE ASS ANON who sent CRITICISM, not even CONSTRUCTIVE to ME about a fic I posted at the END OF SEPTEMBER. It is now HALFWAY through DECEMBER. A little later for 'constructive' criticism, don't you think?

I already answered an ask regarding the timing of these whole anons, which can be found here. Feel free to peruse at your own leisure.

MAKE. IT. MAKE. SENSE.

Yes, I DO ask for feedback when I FIRST POST a work of fiction. But let's be very clear, that very first 'cringe anon' ask I got, was not fucking 'feedback'. I am going to be very fucking direct here when I say you all need to go learn the fucking difference between CONSTRUCTIVE feedback, and straight up criticism.

Something constructive would offer examples. It would not frame the ask as if I should be ashamed for even being capable of producing something 'cringe' and 'unaturally writen'. (Unnaturally written, I digress, but I'm quoting here; providing examples).

Here is the ask in question below which started this whole 'cringe anon' thing.

Again, referencing the TIMING of this whole ordeal, it is VERY fucking obvious this ask was sent because someone was butthurt I made THIS post.

WHY YOU SHOULD TAG AUTHORS IN YOUR FIC REC POSTS.

I'm glad to know that SO many of your attitude regarding a literally hate anon that was sent to me, while said anon was being very rude about it towards me, is "you should roll over and LET them step all over you." I've said it before, and I'll say it again. This is MY fucking blog. If I receive a rude ANONYMOUS message shitting all over my hard work, yeah, I'm going to be fucking upset about it. Just like I'm fucking upset about this now.

Also, I DON'T CONTROL OTHER PEOPLE'S ACTIONS!

Just as certain people will defend me regarding this entire ordeal, others will not. Others, like you here, anon, will not agree with me, but I feel like you're getting a lot of your facts mixed up, and THAT is not fair. You're free to oppose me, to say how I responded was rude, and perhaps it was, to some people. I honestly took the anons lightly, I made a joke out of it, as you can CLEARLY SEE in my responses to both anons. Until other people started banging their pots and pans, crying that I, emphasis on I, am the one calling other people 'hoe's, and being rude to hateful anons, I was not thinking about people actually coming onto MY BLOG and defending the ANONYMOUS PERSON sending ME hate!

And let's examine the idea of constructive criticism, shall we? You know when that is actually acceptable? When the product in question is still being constructed! Chapter Fifteen (15) of Paradise Gardens had been out for WELL over two months at this point. If I had gotten this same ask back when I was first ASKING for feedback, I probably would have shrugged it off, went, "okay, thanks, but that's just your opinion. Sorry you didn't enjoy the chapter." And guess what? My followers STILL would have more than likely come to my defence and send stuff like, "idk what that other anon was on about, but the chapter was incredible!"

No body knows my blog better than I do. I run it, for fuck's sake! But let's understand the full picture before you try and focus on the (very jumbled, and clearly very wrong) details you might have.

Am I adding more fuel to the fire at this point? Maybe. Am I fucking mad this keeps going on when all I originally asked for was basic fucking RESPECT for your favourite authors by showing them SUPPORT with a tag in your fic rec posts? Yes. Yes I fucking am.

Like, let's break this down for a second. This is ALL really about SOMEONE, emphasis on SOMEONE because I don't know fucking WHO it is since the 'cringe anon's came on exactly that, ANON. This is really ALL about someone taking time out of THEIR fucking day to be salty in MY ask box, on MY blog, because I made a post (again, linked above in all caps) stating why you should have basic respect, common curtesy, be a decent fucking human being, and tag your authors in your fic rec posts.

Good fucking day.

[crystalelemental]

Okay, since you're (kinda) back, and I do miss reading your teambuilding and sync pair analysis posts, I want you to talk about Lear! Not his SS version since I know you don't like Gholdengo (but would be appreciated if you decide to do), but his OG version, his grid expansion. I want to know what you think of it as I slowly candy him to 5/5!

I can talk about his Gholdengo version. It'll be a little shorter this time, I don't think the full length posts I did before were entirely sustainable or all that easy to read but here goes. Also I'm, like, really tired and possibly still sick? So I apologize if this isn't as thorough.

Lear (grid expansion) Hoopa got some extremely funny abilities with this one. No Stat Boost effect on the opponent's field after Snatch is great to prevent his sync getting sniped, Unbuffed Foe Freebie is great for spamming his own attack, Unfortuitous is kinda whatever, and his all stats +1 on sync is fun for Rising Tide. They're great skills, and Lear can reasonably pick all of them up without losing much at all.

There are, however, a handful of small issues he still runs into. Specifically: Snatch is still single target. To be able to get these benefits of Free Moves Next and his general sync, he needs to hit all three opponents. He also really wants to hit his Trainer Move for ramping, and the X Sp Atk getting Ramp Up is still just too slow for him to rely on.

In truth, I feel like this changes surprisingly little for him. His sync is stronger, but it was generally strong enough already, it's just catching up. The removal of the opponent's buffing ability for a while is great to ensure sync can't get sniped, but most stages are understandable in a way that you can rest pretty assured it won't be anyway. The Free Moves Next effect is nice for complementing stronger Psychic-type strikers, but I'd be lying if I said I had a good idea of who he'd partner with. He wants Psychic Terrain for the maximum damage, but Bianca has no issue working around gauge, and Anni May also gets an easy Free Moves Next effect. I think if you were aiming for Double Psychic DPS, there's SS Steven, who appreciates the ramping for power and can't spam Free Moves Next himself, making Lear's lack of gauge consumption particularly useful, but this does leave Terrain kind of off the table as Lear really needs the Sp Atk at minimum from a support. I guess you can use Bellelba in CS though and let Snatch with All Stats +3 condition take care of it, but that's only CS.

SS Lear Gholdengo is gross, both in appearance and performance. He has complete immunity to status, status changes (that are common), and stat debuffs, and all of these apply to the whole team if Pasio Circle is up. Which is...really good. It also reduces sync cooldown by 1 every time you use a trainer move. TM gives Move Gauge Acceleration which is great for Steel specifically, on top of maxing his offenses. He gets a good 4-bar move, and his Buddy move is usable after each sync similar to Rei. Pasio Circle is just an applicable Master Fair buff to the field for a while.

For a Sprint/Strike pair, Lear is astonishingly supportive. Head Start anywhere on the team is a fast ramp, into another with the EX. He gives damage reduction, three different lucky skills to the whole party, debuffs, and manages gauges. There is an astounding lack of criticism I can really offer here. He does a job and does it well.

Like usual, he wants rebuffs and/or Zone. Arc Steven is getting mentioned because he's the fresh new toy, but I think they're poorly matched given Steven is focused on physical. The old Variety Thorton is a good specially offensive Steel type that can set Zone, and Lear's ramping doesn't even make that a particularly tall order. Summer Tate is another special Steel type, but he offers Lear very little other than a competent DPS/sync partner. In situations that aren't CS, and maybe some that are, the new free Lilligaleo can put in some nice work as far as applying the Zone goes. And she's also Sprint, so you can get a lot of sync attacks going that way.

On the supportive end, Pasio partnerships should come to mind, however there are very few of substantial value. MC doesn't have many alts that are really itching to take advantage of this. He can apply a bunch of nice effects for the Master BP pairs, but they're not contributing much in turn, barring like...Mesprit's shields, I guess? Paulo's probably the most competent support, despite not technically being support. I think that problem stems more from Pasio having few OCs. Not that I would ever advocate for more.

Lodge Lear It should've been Ground. He would've stood out more.

Lodge Lear feels like one of the more competent Lodge pairs, solely because Power Trip is still pretty great for DPS. His sync is doing alright, but it's a "free" pair, don't get too attached. He is physical, so he gets Arc Steven privileges for persistent PMUN stacking on a great buffer of many stats, as well as SC Steven benefits with the PMUN stacking, SEUN application, and excellent debuffing. Dark Physical is also in a really strong position in general. He gets excellent benefit from NC Calem, partners well with Akari or SC Zinnia, or the new Giacomo who is, from the looks of him, nucking futs. The main thing he needs, though, is a support that really helps Atk/crit buffing, and provides a ton of stats. You know. Like H!Caitlin. Who can buff crit now. So that's exciting.

[observers-journal]

Hello. I know this might be sudden but I feel that I can reach out to you about the whole situation with Tenoch. If you want to share this with the others, that is alright with me. I appreciate you reading my long rant.

I usually don't post things on social media because, imo, it's all a fuckin' mess that just seems to aim on seeing the souls and humanities of people. But I just have this weight that I need to get off my shoulders, especially with what I have seen these past few months. I'm not going to mention all these crazy controversies that have been happening because it is all perfectly explained to me, and if others still can't understand or refuse to understand, then the problem is them.

With that out of the way, I am just wondering of the changes going on. I know that TH has to step out of social media due to what's going on, which I don't blame him for, but I'm glad that there has been positive things happening, and I think it is due to the dedication and courage of the people who truly believe in him, as they are braver than I am to be willing to step into the battlefield for a person who has been a beacon in this dark and cruel world.

While it has been slowly getting positive for TH, as for Maldemort (yes, who shall not be named), I feel that there has been some kind of shift. At first, with the events in June, it was all chaos and hectic, which I personally think she enjoyed, probably even more than the attention she got from her acid attack and the law she wants to take credit for. But now, the attention seems to have simmered even after her recent posts about her, especially her case about her, other than the tragic death of the deputy that she mentioned. Even the news seems to have simmered down regarding her, and even when posting things about her, there is either low views with no comments or heightened views but with comments that criticized them for not reporting on her behaviors and her crimes, and it's not just TH fans, but also people who seem to be unaware or neutral about her.

This is taking longer than I thought, and I apologized for it, but I am getting to the point. The reason why I am mentioning all of this is because I am wondering if these changes going on are due to what has been exposed about Maldemort, or if people are forgetting and moving on from it, or if people either see her for whom she is or they' re bored and tired of her and attention seeking schemes. I just want to know what you guys think, because I don't knownwhat to think and I could be wrong.

Anyway, I have got this weight off my shoulders and feel lighter for now. All I hope that TH has his lawsuit ready, and exposed the narcissistic psychopath of whom she truly is because something tells me that he's almost done and he's waiting for the right time to do it. He's a very intelligent man that many people have underestimated, and I think he has stuff about her that we don't know about since he has been dealing with this for over a year. And it might reach the point that she won't be able to defend the indefensible no matter what she would say or try to manipulate in social media.

Thank you for reading my long rant, and I appreciate all your opinions.

Hey nonnie, thanks for being comfortable enough to share this with me 😊 Anon asks can only be answered through posting (I think) so here it is. And I think the community will appreciate your thoughts on this too!

TH is way smarter than these people thought as you said and unfortunately he has been the subject of several attacks before too. Nor would she have seen coming the deluge of actual evidence-based allegations on her, and how her accusations were debunked so smartly by Tenoch supporters.

It's probably a mix of both forgetting and seeing through her BS I think. People are not fools to be played around, so yeah there's definitely both of those factors playing a role.

I think it's very wise for TH to stay away from social media. It brings more harm than good, especially in such situations. He does lurk around on IG though, although not as actively as before.

We all hope he sues the hell out of her. And can you imagine what all he possibly knows and has kept private to himself, when the public could dig out so much? Coz until then the media narrative in Mexico might favor MER as we now understand, as it is in the hands of people who dislike T rather strongly.

BUT, I just saw El Elegido is trending on Mexico! I would take that as a good signal? Great signal! Slowly but surely but he's coming back ❤️

Take care, and feel free to share more of your thoughts!

[emilykaldwen]

A long time ago I stopped reading and reviewing your work because you started making these kind of comment posts. I want to keysmash and share my excitement at your work but it began to feel like walking on eggshells so I stopped. You are not just about leaving nasty comments, you explicitly censor anything negatively toned even if it's not about your story. Like if I say in passing I don't like Otto in general you take that as an attack on your story.

Your whole attitude in general is very defensive on here. If people don't somehow align with your personal ethos, you respond aggressively, no matter what it is or if it's not aimed at you. You're extremely critical too and overreact. Your friends are very similar to you. When they express opinions, it becomes just an exercise in gatekeeping or dictating to the fandom. Your post there is a perfect example of telling people what to do because anything else doesn't suit you. Maybe you don't want criticism etc but I welcome feedback of all kinds and review it accordingly. I've learned a lot from critical comments. I know it's not for everyone but that's the point, everyone is different. You want everyone to be like you and follow your rules. You're a tin hat dictator.

This was written because people were going into a fellow author's comments and all they were doing was tearing down the character journeys. That's not constructive criticism, that's just being shitty.

I'm sorry that you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around me, I welcome keysmashing and excitement, but genuinely, I'm not here to read unsolicited criticism (which IS different from feedback) about something I'm doing in my free time. And that's okay. And it's okay if you're explicitly welcoming concrit. But my concrit is curated through my beta readers. If I wanted constructive crit, I would explicitly ask for that.

When it comes to crit, at the end of the day, I don't know you (general you). You don't know me! and we don't have the trust of that kind of talk, and only my beta circle knows the kind of story that I'm trying to tell.

Like I said, it's totally fine if you are someone who is looking for/welcoming that. All my post was saying, as I said up top: this post was in direct response to people being assholes with nothing constructive and hurting people who have worked hard on their stories. It upset me, and I'm allowed to be upset, because it's like people don't understand there's someone on the other side of the screen.

When you leave a comment about wanting x character to die and you hate them and complain about choices the author is making, consistently, across chapters, I feel like we should all agree that that's shitty behavior. It's being mean for the sake of being loud. It's going into someone's inbox and telling them all this effort you put in is all for nothing because I personally don't like it.

And honestly, I've been in this space long enough where I'm just tired of it. This is supposed to be a fun hobby for people: it's why I always say 'if you don't know what kind of comment to leave, just say thanks! or leave a heart emoji'. And yeah, I get upset in my friend's comments because I'm on the other side listening to her cry because every single comment she's getting is wanting characters to die or complaining about plot points. THAT is what this is about. And I think anyone would feel that for a friend who has been working so hard on something that they're excited and passionate about.

Because when someone leaves a comment talking about what they hate/dislike about the story and that's it, with nothing about 'hey I really like this character portrayal or plot', that sucks. That's demotivating. And I'm seeing it happen across the board and driving writers away. This is why people stop writing.

Fic authors, we aren't publishing books. This isn't up for review USA Today. It's on tumblr, or wattpad, or AO3.

There is 100% a difference between well thought out feedback, and just being inconsiderate and unkind in someone's comments and going shocked pikachu when an author says 'I'm sorry you don't like it, but don't do that'. That's all I'm saying.

I'm not defensive about myself, I'm upset and angry on behalf of what I see happening to my friends, and what I see across fandoms as a whole. I'm glad you've found commenters helpful, but I think we're talking about different types of comments.

[aeterna-auroral-avenger]

Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh!

An excerpt from Scott Lang's memoir just dropped, and I am so excited!! I can't wait for this book to come out! I'm going to devour this book when I get my hands on it.

Posting it below because I will want to read it again and again and again later

HI THERE. HOWDY. HEYA! Man, I hate introductions.

If you’re reading this book, first of all, thank you! Even though I can make my body as large as the Empire State Building, some days my self-esteem gets, well, ant-sized. Maybe that’s an occupational hazard of being an Avenger and working alongside the mightiest and smartest people on Earth, but the feeling is still there. Even when I remember that I did help save half the world.

Anyway, my name is Scott Lang. You may now or at one time have known me as “Ant-Man.” I’ve been involved in some Super Hero stuff you might have heard about, some Super Hero stuff you probably haven’t heard about, and some Super Hero stuff you might be tired of hear­ing about—at least if you’re anything like my immedi­ate family.

But who is Scott Lang? Well, I’m just an average, middle-aged white guy who went to a fancy nerd col­lege, got married, and landed a solid white-collar desk job. I used to work as a computer guy at VistaCorp, a huge tech firm that deals with security. (Oh, the irony of that, but just wait for it!) My wife Maggie and I had a baby girl named Cassie, and we were heading into an uncomplicated, peaceful suburban life outside of San Francisco.

I mean, sure, on our TVs we were watching the world occasionally coming under attack by strange beings. But we also saw this amazing group of Super Heroes called the Avengers, who always managed to show up exactly when they were needed and send those baddies back . . . away. From our planet. And my life.

However, there were still some baddies right here on Earth. Specifically, in my workplace.

As I began to discover over time, my company was not completely on the up-and-up. Under the (mis)guidance of my boss, the company I was working at, VistaCorp, started using its prowess with security to take advantage of customers. Specifically, someone either overlooked or deliberately created a glitch in the payment-processing software, skimming millions of dollars from customer accounts.

I decided I was not okay with that.

After multiple attempts to push back against the company, attempts that one might describe as “legal” or “reasonable” or “advisable,” I decided to go in a dif­ferent direction.

I’d like to start with the positives: I returned five mil­lion dollars to our customers and exposed VistaCorp’s nefarious dealings to the public.

And, on the other side, I also drove an extremely expensive sports car into an extremely expensive pool, and myself into San Quentin Federal Penitentiary for three years.

Even worse, this was also around the time that my marriage to Maggie broke up. I don’t want to get into the specifics of why—that’s strictly Scott-Maggie stuff—but let’s just say “Husband suddenly going to the pen for three years” wasn’t exactly a marriage-saver.

More critically, though, that divorce, plus imprison­ment, effectively separated me from my dear, sweet daughter, Cassie. For way too many of her precious first few years. I wondered if she and I would ever even have the chance to make a connection.

Eventually, I finished my sentence, left San Q, and attempted to rejoin the world. Even if the world didn’t quite seem to know what to do with me yet. I couldn’t get a job with a conviction on my record. I had no funds or place to stay. Even my one joyful attempt to reunite with Cassie was cut short by Maggie and her fiancé, telling me I had to get my life together before we could talk visitation or shared custody.

Fortunately, though, there was one guy who did have a use for me.

Unless you’ve spent the past few years in a cave (or, say, a subatomic realm), you’ve probably at least heard of Pym Technologies. Or at least, Hank Pym.

If you haven’t, Hank Pym was the inventor of the Pym Particle, an incredible scientific breakthrough. Pym Particles have the power to cause molecular reduction or expansion at great scales in either direction. In other words, they can make anything super-small or super-big. Hank and his wife, Janet Van Dyne, put this to direct use on themselves, performing countless heroic deeds as the original Ant-Man and The Wasp.

And outside of the Super Hero game, Hank started a serious R&D operation known as Pym Technologies. But a few years ago, Pym Tech fell into the unscrupulous hands of people who wanted to exploit his discoveries for use on the battlefield—and to sell the resulting technology to folks we really do not want to be in battle with! By then, Hank had been pushed out of the com­pany that literally had his last name on the door. But he knew what was being planned with his invention, and that it had to be stopped. So he . . . let’s say “hired” me to recover his creations from Pym Tech.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, Scott! is probably what you’re saying right now. How did we jump from custody disputes to biotech espionage?

Well, right about the time I was stumbling out of prison, trying to find myself, Hank Pym—whom I didn’t know at the time—found me. Hank had done his research on me and knew I was skilled at both elec­tronics and thievery. And most importantly, he knew that I had nothing left to lose.

Unbeknownst to me, he “tested” me by enticing me to steal the Ant-Man suit from his highly formidable safe. Once I succeeded at that, Hank and his daughter, Hope Van Dyne, kinda “stole” me from police custody, offered me the gig (as if I had a choice!), and then trained me to pull off one of the craziest high-tech heists ever.

So, return the potentially world-threatening military technology to its rightful creator, and it’s back to peace again, right?

Wrong.

Literally no sooner had I pulled off the Pym Tech operation (with an assist from some old prison pals and some extremely skilled ants) than I found myself face-to-face with the Avengers.

Well, two of them, anyway. Captain America and the Falcon. Believe me, two’s more than enough! I’d already had a tussle with the Falcon, but now he and Cap (as I would soon be calling him, no big deal) actually wanted my help.

Wow. I mean, wow! It wasn’t just cranky old semi-retired scientists tracking me down anymore—now I’d caught the attention of Earth’s Mightiest.

So what they wanted me for was . . . a bit messy. Basically, the Avengers had a huge internal divide over something too complicated to get into here, and Cap and Falcon wanted some fresh (and highly size-adaptable) muscle on their side. Especially when all of this culminated in a huge Avengers-vs.-Avengers fracas at an airport in Germany. Germany! I’d just spent three years in a tiny cell. Now I was suddenly “doing Europe”?

I don’t want to get into the details of the conflict (and in fact I am under legal obligation not to), but let’s just

say I might have been on the more “badass” side of it.

In the end, that whole fight got resolved, as I think you know. Otherwise our planet would be a scorched battlefield of never-ending intra-Avengers smackdowns.

So . . . peace on Earth now?

Nope. That’s when—thanks to Thanos—half of all life in the universe disappeared. So no, no peace on Earth or anywhere else.

I wasn’t around for those five years of missing people (you’ll find out why soon), but I came back just in time, jumped to a different timeline, fought, like, every bad guy in the universe on a field in upstate New York, helped the Avengers stop Thanos, and put all the people back where they belonged. Including, last but not least, putting my precious Hope back together with me!

As you might imagine, that was . . . a lot.

So in the time since, I’ve been trying to take things a bit easier. Nursing wounds. Reconnecting with those I’ve missed. Reflecting on what it all means.

Oh yes, and of course, writing this book!

And if you want to really get to know who Scott Lang is, reading this book is where I’d recommend you start.

So at this point, I bet you also have a very serious question—one which I’ve asked myself over a thousand times a day while writing this:

Why on Earth is Scott Lang the first Super Hero writ­ing a book?

I mean, just between us, I’m proud to be an Avenger, but sometimes I also feel like a “latecomer.” Sure, I came through in the ultimate clutch, but in baseball terms, I’m not a starter—I’m a DH (designated hero).

Here’s how I see it: I’m the “everyman Avenger.” I’m the one you could grab a beer with, the one you’d feel okay asking to look after your dog when you’re away or for a drive to the airport. I’m not a Super Soldier or a billionaire (unless this book is super-successful), just a regular dad, a San Francisco Giants fan, and a guy who’s made mistakes I’m still trying to rectify.

In a word, I’m an ordinary guy who’s been thrust—more than once—into extraordinary circumstances.

And I know that still doesn’t completely answer the question of why I wrote this book.

The simple answer is, “The Avengers asked me to.”

One day, Bruce “the Hulk” Banner and Clint “Hawkeye” Barton took me out for lunch. They said they were con­cerned that the world didn’t really know what had hap­pened with Thanos and the Blip and our long struggle to finally put things right again.

At first, as I usually do when confronted with heavy topics, I made a joke: “I’m pretty sure at least half the world knows what happened.”

Bruce responded that yes, of course, billions had experienced these jarring and mind-bending events, but they didn’t know the full story behind them. And ultimately, that’s what people need the most to get through and get past traumatic events: a narrative that helps it all make sense.

“Okay,” I agreed. “Solid plan. So who are you going to get to tell that story?”

Clint answered, “You, Scott. You’re the guy who got scooped up in all this pretty recently. You’ve still got one foot in their world. And you’re a guy everyone likes . . . and trusts.”

And Bruce sealed the deal: “It’s tough stuff, and no one knows how to keep it light like you.”

Well. I still had tons of doubts. I was hardly an eye­witness to almost all that history. I hadn’t been around for the Battle of Wakanda, or any of the events that led to Thanos gathering the various Infinity Stones.

But pretty much immediately, I knew what my answer would be. As far as I’m concerned, when the Avengers ask you do to a job—any job—you say yes. So I did. Two quick handshakes (Bruce—now permanently in his Hulk body—made sure to keep his “not too firm”), and it was settled. They’d supply me all the archival footage and documentation, take me anywhere I needed to go, and let me ask as many questions as I needed.

The only thing is, it wasn’t actually 100 percent set­tled for me—on the inside. From the confidence peak of having two amazing Super Heroes place their trust in you, there was a frighteningly steep plummet into self-doubt. Even with their sensible reasons, the whole affair just stirred up a question that’s been burning inside me most of my adult life:

Why me?

I’ve been asking myself that since before I even met the Avengers. Back when I was working at VistaCorp, why was I the only one who couldn’t sleep at night after learning of all the money they were stealing from cus­tomers? Why did I basically give up my job, give up my marriage, and spend three years in San Quentin, just so I could play Robin Hood?

And finally—and this one still smarts—when VistaCorp’s nasty business became public to the world, why was I the one who ended up going down for it?

I don’t know the answers to these questions. And perhaps I never will.

Not even Doctor Strange can tell me, and believe me, it’s not for my lack of asking. Once the purple dust had settled from the Battle of Earth, I tried bonding with the guy. Let’s just say, he was either unwilling or uninterested in filling me in about any of my 14,000,605 possible pasts.

But here’s what I do know. That VistaCorp/prison experience taught me that our world is broken. And that it’s never going to get fixed unless folks like me—the unlikely ones—step up to the job.

And when Hank Pym plucked me out of the ex-con pool and put me to work as Ant-Man 2.0, I started to see the haziest outlines of a “why” for me. Maybe all those hard years I had just endured were actually preparation for a higher purpose.

Which is a good thing, because right after my first outing as a hero, I was drafted into that aforementioned very scary and sort of confusing business with Avengers fighting other Avengers in Germany, I was sent to an underwater super -SUPER-max prison, and once again, I had to take the fall and spend two more years in deten­tion under house arrest.

Why me again?

Still no perfect lock on the answer, but I was beginning to glimpse one. This is going to sound beyond weird for a guy whose success—and often life—depends on quantum mechanics, but basically, I had a feeling.

Even as I was yanked from one seemingly unthink­able scenario to another, asked to do things I would have never dreamed possible, I began to see that many incredible things were, in fact, possible—and I was doing them. And they started to feel more and more, for lack of a better word, right.

I know this is the kind of feeling my Avengers pals feel mid-mission or mid-battle, and maybe they’ve gotten used to it, but I’m just finally getting there. To the feel­ing that, even when faced with the most terrifying foes imaginable, even with the odds exponentially stacked against you, if you are working side by side with others to serve a greater good, you are in the right place, doing the right thing. For you.

And honestly, that’s the real story behind the entire Avengers saga. It’s the one I thought was most essential to share with all of you. That was the deeper reason I said yes to those two Avengers at the lunch counter. Because I knew that, once again, I was being called to do what seemed impossible (or at least, highly inadvisable)—but instead, I let the feeling take hold, and guide me.

And I realized that I needed to share that feeling with you.

Because at the end of the day, nobody can tell where life is going to yank them, unexpectedly and seemingly beyond their reach. Steve Rogers signed up to fight, imagining he’d only go as far as a scrawny guy can get in wartime. Tony Stark was brilliant and successful, but I know a part of him wondered if he’d ever get out from under his dad’s shadow. Even Doctor Strange in all his professional success could never have imagined becoming a Master of the Mystic Arts—or even that such a thing existed!

And that same unpredictability is just as true for you as it is for me. What would you do if life shrunk you down and tossed you into a bathtub being filled by your former prison buddy? Okay, that one might just be me. But how about when life sends you unexpectedly packing from your gig of three years and straight into a jail cell—because you dared to blow the whistle on your company’s greed?

You don’t ask why. You ask, “Where do I go from here?”

Because that’s the job life has for you, at least right at this moment, and it’s the kind of job you don’t get to quit.

You can run, but you can’t hide—not even if you can shrink yourself down and leap into a bathtub.

Now I know I said before that I don’t, technically, have a super-power. But looked at another way, I actually do. And the even cooler part is, so do all of you.

Having the ability to change my size at will, I’ve seen that the world is full of “big guys” and “little guys.” And unsurprisingly, the former is always stepping on the latter. Sometimes this is by design, but sometimes, just because of their status and drive, the big folks don’t even see the everyday, hard-working folks just trying to get by.

That’s why it’s always the job of people like me—and, as I’m going to show you throughout this book, you—to look out for the little guy. That’s something we all have a super-powered ability to do, if we simply choose to accept the job.

You are in this place and time for a reason, and no one else is. And so—when that next uncertain, unlikely, “impossible” step is revealed to you—I urge you with every particle in my body, Pym or otherwise, to turn that “Why me?” into a “Why not me?”

At least that’s what I tried to do when I promised the Avengers I would tell their story. And the best way I know how to do that is by telling mine at the same time. Because as I’ve learned, whenever I start to talk about something big that happened, I also see the little lessons that can be learned from it, and I want to share that, to help myself and others.

Maybe it’s because I didn’t get the chance to be around my daughter Cassie for so many chunks of her life, to share what I’d learned with her. I’m still working on that, but it’s hard now that she’s a grown-up herself who’s already seen and experienced so much without me to guide her. I missed the boat on that one, but believe me, you are in for an entire book of “Dad wisdom” just burning for a home.

So that’s what I plan to do in this book. I’m going to tell it all, from how I saw it, experienced it, and heard it firsthand from my hero buddies. I’m going to bring you into the hero world.

Along the way, you’ll hear about my story—Scott Lang’s story—from where I started to the (ant-) man I’ve become, and am still becoming. Because I’m so incredibly fascinating? No. Because my life—just like yours—loses half its value if we don’t find a way to share its lessons with others.

And finally, because—if you take nothing else away from my words—what I want to share is that what makes all of us giants is how much we look out for the little guy. How we help out our fellow humans when they need it most. How our greatest super-power can simply be a listening ear, a concerned eye, or an outstretched hand. How we don the “hero’s uniform” by simply showing up and doing the unbelievably unlikely job that life has just handed us.

And speaking of jobs, I’ve got an entire rest of a book to write. Oh, why did I agree to this? WHY ME?

[preppymayhem]

First off you didn't need to @ me, I get notified when you reblog my post.

Under a read more to spare people's dashboards

Firstly, I am legit angry about another huge overwhelming dogpile on a female public figure that yes from what I have seen in the responses to this post comes off as based in deep societal misogyny, and I'm tired of it. I don't think Zegler deserves the disrespect, disregard and absolute hatred that is thrown her way for some silly remarks made on a promotional tour for a commercial film on behalf of a multinational billion dollar corporation who holds all the power, all the decision making ability and yet everyone seems to think it is the right thing to attack a 22 year old actress fulfilling her contractual obligations. So yes

Secondly, my post was not just in reaction to your post, if you will notice there is another reblog between my post and your initial post. So my post was also in response to that reblog as well as all the other reblogs and replies and tags placed in your response to this post, and yeah it's probably my bad for not making it clear. But also Tumblr is a public forum. Your post is going to escape containment. So your thing being about it being your personal blog is not a defense and not an excuse. You want to do that without people responding, private the post, make it so that no one can reblog, share your thoughts in a Discord with your friends. Tumblr is not the space for that.

To clarify my comments regarding misogyny and conservative dogwhistles that was mostly pertaining to the outbursts about how "it's okay for a woman to want to fall in love with a man" and "the okay to be feminine and follow traditional gender" because how those arguments have happened in this context and elsewhere whenever anyone dare criticize or point out the issues with certain portrayals of women or dare suggest that there is more varied ways to portray or go about talking about women. Not to mention the people in the responses to the post who are crying about the "wokeness" or leftists who are agreeing and cosigning your post. But I am not going to go through and reblog and respond to every person because I do not have the time or the inclination

So no I was not trying to be clever, I was and am legit calling out conservative dogma and ideas and misogyny as I see it. I didn't call in anyone particular a misogynist because newsflash you do not need to be a raging misogynist to act or contribute to societal misogyny just as you don't need to be an out an out white supremacist to do a racist act.

But if I were to just respond to your post, my response is that most of your bullet points are irrelevant to the conversation around Zegler. Nothing Zegler said or even how she said takes away or diminishes the original film. It does not matter to the conversation about her what Snow White did at the box office, or how hard any of the animators work or what Walt Disney sacrificed has nothing to do with Zegler or her comments and I struggle to understand why that matters to this conversation.

And no, I don't think it is unlikely that Walt Disney did not have making commentary on child abuse or child marriage when he was making Snow White. I think he was focused on doing a straightforward if sanitized adaptation of an old fairy tale in order to make an entertaining picture that people would like to go see in the theater and thus make him a lot of money and growing influence. Disney was a Man of his time, he was not particularly more progressive or conservative than what was to be expected for any white man of his class of his day. And again the things about the nuance or status of child abuse was directed more to the reblog of the post than it was to your post itself.

I say prostrate before the original because what do you really want, because from your post and others it sounds like you want Zegler (and others) to state flatly that of course the movie they are in is lesser than the film that is remaking and they are just never going to do that. And I don't believe that any movie made at any point whether now, or in the past or in the future deserves or is entitled to undying reverence, loyalty, deference or freedom from criticism. Nor do I think Walt Disney or any of the creatives behind any Disney film or any film at all are above reproach and I resent the idea that they should be. I also resent that people care more about respecting an eighty year old movie than a now living breathing human being.

Because from you personally, I think your bone is that you don't think this remake should be happening at all and that's fair, but that is not Zegler's call to make. Because if you are going to remake Disney's Snow White and the Seven Dwarves than of course you are going to make changes to the story, the characters and themes because we are not living in 1937. You have to update it for a 2024 audience. Because the original film as is would be a tough sell to modern audiences and Disney as it exists right now is not in the business of having to do tough sells to make money on their movies.

And neither you nor I can actually judge whether they made the right changes or choices because neither of us have seen the movie because it isn't even out yet and probably isn't even finished yet. Zegler's remarks are too vague and general to truly discern how it all plays on screen or what exact changes were made. My gut is to think they are probably replicate Cinderella (2015) to an extent due to the age of the original film.

And the thing is, when we talk about changes that is just changes made in this adaptation. You can ignore it and not see it and forget about it. Nobody is changing the original it will still be on Disney+ in the same exact form for anyone to enjoy it. The remake is not replacing the original, but it likely will be more pertinent to younger people today who that is their first exposure to the film.

Third, I actually looked at what she said and personally, I don't think what she said is that bad or all that derogatory to the original. It is certainly on par to what every other actor in any Disney remake has said about any of the original Disney movies so partly I am bewildered why this has sparked so much rancor other than people seem to have a pre-existing hatred of her.

And to be frank, I find the criticism to be focused on the "how" of it all to be immediately suspect. Women in general are overly criticized for how they speak, present and perform in the public spheres. So maybe she didn't phrase things in the best most graceful way. But there are actors who have said way worse things about the source material for their films or shows than Zegler has said about Snow White (1937) but they have not gotten near the amount of backlash that she has gotten, and so yes I am going to call that out.

And I made the statement on my views on Zegler and Disney movies because I am a debate kid and was stating my stakes, I more was trying to say that I am not a Disney remake or Rachel Zegler stan. I am just a person who is concerned and honestly distressed by the unfair treatment I am seeing piled on person who doesn't deserve it.

I Hate How She Talks About Snow White

"People are making these jokes about ours being the PC Snow White, where it's like, yeah, it is − because it needed that. It's an 85-year-old cartoon, and our version is a refreshing story about a young woman who has a function beyond 'Someday My Prince Will Come. "

Let me tell you a little something's about that "85-year-old cartoon," miss Zegler.

It was the first-ever cel-animated feature-length full-color film. Ever. Ever. EVER. I'm worried that you're not hearing me. This movie was Disney inventing the modern animated film. Spirited Away, Into the Spider-Verse, Tangled, you don't get to have any of these without Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937.)

It was praised, not just for its technical marvels, not just for its synchronized craft of sound and action, but primarily and enduringly because people felt like the characters were real. They felt more like they were watching something true to life than they did watching silent, live-action films with real actors and actresses. They couldn't believe that an animated character could make kids wet their pants as she flees, frightened, through the forest, or grown adults cry with grieving Dwarves. Consistently.

Walt Disney Studios was built on this movie. No no; you're not understanding me. Literally, the studio in Burbank, out of which has come legends of this craft of animated filmmaking, was literally built on the incredible, odds-defying, record-breaking profits of just Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, specifically.

Speaking of record-breaking profits, this movie is the highest-grossing animated film in history. Still. TO THIS DAY.

In fact, it made four times as much money than any other film, in any other genre, released during that time period. It was actually THE highest-grossing film of all time, in any genre, until nothing less than Gone With the Wind, herself, came along to take the throne.

It was the first-ever animated movie to be selected for the National Film Registry. Actually, it was one of the first movies, period, to ever go into the registry at all. You know what else is in the NFR? The original West Side Story, the remake of which is responsible for Rachel Ziegler's widespread fame.

Walt Disney sacrificed for this movie to be invented. Literally, he took out a mortgage on his house and screened the movie to banks for loans to finish paying for it, because everyone from the media to his own wife and brother told him he was crazy to make this movie. And you want to tell me it's just an 85-year-old cartoon that needs the most meaningless of updates, with your tender 8 years in the business?

Speaking of sacrifice, this movie employed over 750 people, and they worked immeasurable hours of overtime, and invented--literally invented--so many new techniques that are still used in filmmaking today, that Walt Disney, in a move that NO OTHER STUDIO IN HOLLYWOOD was doing in the 30's, put this in the opening credits: "My sincere appreciation to the members of my staff whose loyalty and creative endeavor made possible this production." Not the end credits, like movies love to do today as a virtue-signal. The opening credits.

It's legacy endures. Your little "85-year-old cartoon" sold more than 1 million DVD copies upon re-release. Just on its first day. The Beatles quoted Snow White in one of their songs. Legacy directors call it "the greatest film ever made." Everything from Rolling Stones to the American Film Institute call this move one of the most influential masterpieces of our culture. This movie doesn't need anything from anybody. This movie is a cultural juggernaut for America. It's a staple in the art of filmmaking--and art, in general. It is the foundation of the Walt Disney Company, of modern children's media in the West, and of modern adaptations of classical fairy tales in the West. When you think only in the base, low, mean terms of "race" and "progressivism" you start taking things that are actually worlds-away from being in your league to judge, and you relegate them to silly ignorant phrases like "85-year-old cartoon" to explain why what you're doing is somehow better.

Sit down and be humble. Who the heck are you?

[sparkelingspectres]

i mean this as nicely as possible but you may be reading too much into that post and taking it as far more of an attack than it was meant to be. personally i read it as a criticism of the trope in childrens media where "ugly = evil" and i think its a valuable criticism of the industry

Lol I think I'm definitely reading too much into that post I'm considering deleting it bc its 12 am where I'm writing from so I've got tired brainrot and it wasnt my intention at all for my arguement to come off as an attack towards the op but rather I was intending for it to be more of a peaceful debate breaking down the prevalence and reason for some of the tropes but there were some flaws in my arguement such as that in retrospect my first response can absolutely come off as aggressive which I didnt mean. And I didnt make it clear that I in no way support the ugly=evil trope, that one should absolutely be abolished. But other ones like the good guys having mostly likeable qualities, the bad guys having mostly dislikeable qualities, and the bad guys, in a fantastical series, being monstrous or non human-like isnt necessarily a bad thing and merely serves for thoughtless entertainment as long as it isnt done in an offensive way, which was essentially what I was trying to say but I was digging way too much into it and it didnt really come off right

[qqueenofhades]

Hi. You made a post a couple of days ago about how queer historical fiction doesnt need to be defined only by homophobia. Can you expand on that a bit maybe? Because it seems interesting and important, but I'm a little confused as to whether that is responsible to the past and showing how things have changed over time. Anyway this probably isn't very clear, but I hope its not insulting. Have a good day :)

Hiya. I assume you're referring to this post, yes? I think the main parameters of my argument were set out pretty clearly there, but sure, I'm happy to expand on it. Because I'm a little curious as to why you think that writing a queer narrative (especially a queer fictional narrative) that doesn't make much reference to or even incorporate explicit homophobia is (implicitly) not being "responsible to the past." I've certainly made several posts on this topic before, but as ever, my thoughts and research materials change over time. So, okay.

(Note: I am a professional historian with a PhD, a book contract for an academic monograph on medieval/early modern queer history, and soon-to-be-several peer-reviewed publications on medieval queer history. In other words, I'm not just talking out of my ass here.)

As I noted in that post, first of all, the growing emphasis on "accuracy" in historical fiction and historically based media is... a mixed bag. Not least because it only seems to be applied in the Game of Thrones fashion, where the only "accurate" history is that which is misogynistic, bloody, filthy, rampantly intolerant of competing beliefs, and has no room for women, people of color, sexual minorities, or anyone else who has become subject to hot-button social discourse today. (I wrote a critical post awhile ago about the Netflix show Cursed, ripping into it for even trying to pretend that a show based on the Arthurian legends was "historically accurate" and for doing so in the most simplistic and reductive way possible.) This says far more about our own ideas of the past, rather than what it was actually like, but oh boy will you get pushback if you try to question that basic premise. As other people have noted, you can mix up the archaeological/social/linguistic/cultural/material stuff all you like, but the instant you challenge the ingrained social ideas about The Bad Medieval Era, cue the screaming.

I've been a longtime ASOIAF fan, but I do genuinely deplore the effect that it (and the show, which was by far the worst offender) has had on popular culture and widespread perceptions of medieval history. When it comes to queer history specifically, we actually do not know that much, either positive or negative, about how ordinary medieval people regarded these individuals, proto-communities, and practices. Where we do have evidence that isn't just clerical moralists fulminating against sodomy (and trying to extrapolate a society-wide attitude toward homosexuality from those sources is exactly like reading extreme right-wing anti-gay preachers today and basing your conclusions about queer life in 2021 only on those), it is genuinely mixed and contradictory. See this discussion post I likewise wrote a while ago. Queerness, queer behavior, queer-behaving individuals have always existed in history, and labeling them "queer" is only an analytical conceit that represents their strangeness to us here in the 21st century, when these categories of exclusion and difference have been stringently constructed and applied, in a way that is very far from what supposedly "always" existed in the past.

Basically, we need to get rid of the idea that there was only one empirical and factual past, and that historians are "rewriting" or "changing" or "misrepresenting" it when they produce narratives that challenge hegemonic perspectives. This is why producing good historical analysis is a skill that takes genuine training (and why it's so undervalued in a late-capitalist society that would prefer you did anything but reflect on the past). As I also said in the post to which you refer, "homophobia" as a structural conceit can't exist prior to its invention as an analytical term, if we're treating queerness as some kind of modern aberration that can't be reliably talked about until "homosexual" gained currency in the late 19th century. If there's no pre-19th century "homosexuality," then ipso facto, there can be no pre-19th-century "homophobia" either. Which one is it? Spoiler alert: there are still both things, because people are people, but just as the behavior itself is complicated in the premodern past, so too is the reaction to it, and it is certainly not automatic rejection at all times.

Hence when it comes to fiction, queer authors have no responsibility (and in my case, certainly no desire) to uncritically replicate (demonstrably false!) narratives insisting that we were always miserable, oppressed, ostracised, murdered, or simply forgotten about in the premodern world. Queer characters, especially historical queer characters, do not have to constantly function as a political mouthpiece for us to claim that things are so much better today (true in some cases, not at all in the others) and that modernity "automatically" evolved to a more "enlightened" stance (definitely not true). As we have seen with the recent resurgence of fascism, authoritarianism, nationalism, and xenophobia around the world, along with the desperate battle by the right wing to re-litigate abortion, gay rights, etc., social attitudes do not form in a vacuum and do not just automatically become more progressive. They move backward, forward, and side to side, depending on the needs of the societies that produce them, and periods of instability, violence, sickness, and poverty lead to more regressive and hardline attitudes, as people act out of fear and insularity. It is a bad human habit that we have not been able to break over thousands of years, but "[social] things in the past were Bad but now have become Good" just... isn't true.

After all, nobody feels the need to constantly add subtextual disclaimers or "don't worry, I personally don't support this attitude/action" implied authorial notes in modern romances, despite the cornucopia of social problems we have today, and despite the complicated attitude of the modern world toward LGBTQ people. If an author's only reason for including "period typical homophobia" (and as we've discussed, there's no such thing before the 19th century) is that they think it should be there, that is an attitude that needs to be challenged and examined more closely. We are not obliged to only produce works that represent a downtrodden past, even if the end message is triumphal. It's the same way we got so tired of rape scenes being used to make a female character "stronger." Just because those things existed (and do exist!), doesn't mean you have to submit every single character to those humiliations in some twisted name of accuracy.

Yes, as I have always said, prejudices have existed throughout history, sometimes violently so. But that is not the whole story, and writing things that center only on the imagined or perceived oppression is not, at this point, accurate OR helpful. Once again, I note that this is specifically talking about fiction. If real-life queer people are writing about their own experiences, which are oftentimes complex, that's not a question of "representation," it's a question of factual memoir and personal history. You can't attack someone for being "problematic" when they are writing about their own lived experience, which is something a younger generation of queer people doesn't really seem to get. They also often don't realise how drastically things have changed even in my own lifetime, per the tags on my reblog about Brokeback Mountain, and especially in media/TV.

However, if you are writing fiction about queer people, especially pre-20th century queer people, and you feel like you have to make them miserable just to be "responsible to the past," I would kindly suggest that is not actually true at all, and feeds into a dangerous narrative that suggests everything "back then" was bad and now it's fine. There are more stories to tell than just suffering, queer characters do not have to exist solely as a corollary for (inaccurate) political/social commentary on the premodern past, and they can and should be depicted as living their lives relatively how they wanted to, despite the expected difficulties and roadblocks. That is just as accurate, if sometimes not more so, than "they suffered, the end," and it's something that we all need to be more willing to embrace.

[valkyrieandstrangeridingaragorn]

It was so frustrating trying to get people to understand that there are legitimate reasons to dislike the show. I gave it my best shot. Tried damn hard to be as neutral sounding as possible, too, because one wrong word and it was like I'd personally attacked them. And then there were those that would give an "I definitely get that and you have a point" response, only to go right back to the mocking and insulting that they still do today. I've felt so unwelcome in the MCU fandom since the show.

I feel you, it's always hard to go against the current especially in a fandom that tends to be so reluctant to accept any type of criticism. There's a really good piece about toxic positivity that addresses this type of behaviour but I think it's a lost cause to try and reason with those fans. If they want to read any criticism we all have dozens and dozens of posts talking about what didn't work in the series, they can look for them.

I say that because I'm tired of reading posts where someone says they want to read "different opinions" and so the 'antis' (I hate that word) write at least 5 paragraphs explaining themselves only to get a response of "nah you just hate women". At the end of the day it isn't really about the words you use or your tone... it's them and whether or not they're willing to listen - you can take a horse to a river and all that.

[placebogirl7]

Kinoshita: Ren's assistant and "voice of conscience"

I decided to make an analysis about one of the most underrated character in Nana (also because he doesn't appear that much) but who I appreciate so much. Prepare yourself for a very long post to read because my beloved Kinoshita deserves it! ;) Kinoshita has been introduced as Ren assistant: his role is to drive Ren home when he's too tired, to remind him his schedule, to help him with whatever he needs. Kinoshita is also a big fan of Ren, so he's excited to have the opportunity to work with his idol. When we first see him in the manga, he's driving Ren home after a long day work. He's fashinated about Ren's expensive car and when Ren tells him that it's just a car and he doesn't matter about apprearance unlike Takumi, Kinoshita says to him that he's very talented and rich but he's not ambitious despite this. He also says that he let Takumi have control even his music and that it's when he plays punk music that he gives is best. Kinoshita is firmly convinced that Ren soul belongs to punk and that's the kind of music he should do. Probably in the old days he would have been a huge fan of former Blast! XD He sees the potential of Ren and he's aware that Takumi is "suppressing" it asking him to write songs more suitable for Reira's voice (which is definitely not punk).

At first Ren laughs about Kinoshita's words, because they just seems the words of an excited fan, but later he realized that maybe those words werent' that stupid. In fact, during a talk with Takumi, the latter says something that immediately make Ren remind of Kinoshita. Takumi basically confirmed what Kinoshita himself said before: Ren shows his best when he act like a rebel punk and he plays punk music. Can we just spend one minute looking at Ren's face expression in the last image of the panel below? He's smiling, but there's a sad expression on his face after he realized that Kinoshita's words were right. I think in that moment Ren realized what he had left behind and the fact that he's not free as he was in the past. He has to play the role of Trapnest's guitarist and he can't be anymore just Ren Honjo. Suddenly Takumi's kingdom was not so bright anymore compared to his own one little kingdom he abandoned.

So we can say that Kinoshita is the first one who really realized Ren's real potential and he has no fear to tell him directly.

Another thing that I appreciate about Kinoshita is exactly that he doesn't have fear to tell what he thinks and he has the courage to do it even about Takumi. Despite his evident bad attitude, nobody in Cookie staff has the courage to rebel against Takumi: they just wait for hsi orders and obey to them even if they don't agree. But one day, while talking to Ren, Kinoshita finally expresses what in my opinion is the thought of everyone: they are just little soldiers at the service of Takumi. He respects him and he recognize that he's an excellent business man, but he's not good when it comes to treat people in a decent way. He lacks of empathy and of other things on a human level. Even if Ren doesn't seem to appreciate this, I think Kinoshita was totally right and also I love how he feels at ease to confess to Ren his thoughts and opinion: he doesn't seem to simply consider Ren as an idol or a person he has to take care of but as a sort of friend to whom he can feel free to talk.

Later in the story, Kinoshita starts to re-evaluate Takumi after he found a solution to stop the scandal between Ren and Reira. He understands that Takumi actually cares about the band and its members and he carefully thinks about everything to avoid bad situations or loss that may bring damages to Cookie Music. Also, he doesn't see himself anymore only as Ren's assistant (like he has done until that moment) but he starts to see himself as a "vassal" of Trapnest, embracing Takumi's vision that he had criticized before. Ren is very happy to know that, look at his smile.

And now let's talk about Ren's drug addiction and how Kinoshita reacts to that. Of course Kinoshita knows about Ren's problem but he also knows he can't do a lot to be helpful. When Ren tries to get rid of all the cocaine he has but then starts to suffer from withdrawal, while they are driving to Cookie Music, Kinoshita notices that Ren doesn't feel good at all and tries to convince him to go to the hospital instead of going to work. Ren won't listen to reasons and yell at him to bring him at Cookie Music (knowing that Narita will give him drug). In the end Kinoshita obey to his order, but since he's really worried and not satisfied he later decided to call Takumi and inform him about Ren's conditions. Despite he doesn't like Takumi, he knows that he's the only one he can ask for help because Takumi has something he lack of: the power to find a solution even to the most complicated things. The binomial hate-admiration that Kinoshita has for Takumi is evident from the beginning to the end of the serie. I won't put images of the above mentioned scenes because Tumblr allows you to put only 10 images per post and I need to reserve the space for other images of more important scenes, but I'm sure you all remeber both the scenes I mentioned.

Another thing I want to point out is Kinoshita's vision about Nana and Ren's relationship. We can say that he has always been very considerate about their relationship and he never doubted even for a second that Nana wasn't sincere about Ren. He had understood from Ren that they truly loves each other and he sincerely wanted them to stay together. The little panel below is an example of this: Nana and Ren were having hard times and they rarely met each other. They had just found a new house but they couldn't spend time together in it and Kinoshita seemed to be very sorry because he saw how much Ren needed to stay with her.

Another scene were he demonstrates he cares for Nana and Ren's relationship is when Search publish that scandalous article and all the media start to talk about this, inventing fake things. Ren doesn't say a word and Kinoshita encourages him to do what he want, telling him that if he wants to spend good words about his girlfriend in front of the reporters, he won't prevent him from doing it. He says to Ren "follow what your heart tells you to do", which is the same thing that Yasu himself had told him in the bathroom during the Trapnest Vs. Blast show, when they spoke about Ren's drug addiction and Nana's hyperventilation attacks. Again, Kinoshita is acting like a supportive friend to Ren and not only as a mere assistant. When Ren refuses to do it and defines his old band members and friends (including his girlfriend) "old thrown away partner", Kinoshita seems shocked by that reaction. I personally was shocked too when I read it, because Ren really acted like a jerk in that moment. He put his career and Trapnest above his love and realtionship and friends, acting like Takumi would have acted, and so for Kinoshita (who in that moment still didn't appreciate Takumi for this) it must have been disappointing to see him acting in that cold way towards his lover and friends who were being accused.

Later, while Trapnest are in London, Ren realises that he acted like he didn't care and he reminds of Kinoshita's words (exactly like it happened when he told him he gave his best when he played punk music).

When Ren and Nana separate and Ren refuses to go fetch her because he feels ashamed to meet her and tell her about his drug addiction, Kinoshita takes the initiative and decide that if Ren needs to be encouraged to go to Nana, then he will be the person who will encourage him. He knows that Ren needs Nana and he hopes that reuniting with her could help him to feel better and convince him to stop taking drugs. While they are in Ren's car driving towards Cookie Music and Ren is talking about this with Hachi on the phone, Kinoshita asks him where Nana is in that moment and when he answers "Osaka", Kinoshita immediately change direction and starts to drive towards Osaka.

Again Kinoshita brings out his rebel side and affirms that he can't do what the staff expect him to do or follow Takumi's orders: he's convinced that he's doing the right thing (and he was definitely doing it in my opinion). He blames again Takumi and his way of handling the situation, knowing that what Ren needs is professional help and a break to recover, but Ren suddenly brings out the reality of the fact: he's not disappointed by Takumi or the staff, he's disappointed by him, his own hero, the idol he estimates so much. Kinoshita doesn't know what to answer, he doesn't want to hurt Ren and probably he doesn't want to admit to himself that Ren is right. In the last scene of the panel below, Kinoshita's expression is very sad because he realized that there's nothing he can do anymore to help Ren. He did his best but he failed. I think it must have been hard for him to realize that.

I think we can make a comparison here: Kinoshita has always idealized Ren exactly as Nobu did. They both saw Ren has an invincible hero, a perfect creature to admire and they wish to be like him, but then they realized that not all that glitters is gold and that Ren wasn't as perfect as they saw him. He was actually more fragile then them and they feel powerless because they knew they couldn't do anything to help him. When you idealize a person so much and then you discover that person isn't as you saw him/her, then you feel disappointed and that's what happened to both Kinoshita and Nobu.

Last but not least, after Ren's death Kinoshita tries his best to complete what Ren has left incomplete. His thoughts aren't for Trapnest's future or Cookie Music or for his work: his thoughts are for Nana, just like the last thoughts of Ren were. Kinoshita's mission is to be a sort of "emissary" who has to bring to Nana the feelings Ren was going to express her, his last words, his thoughts for her. The scene below is so sad but I love it, it's one of my favorite in the manga. Looking at Kinoshita crying while saying that "Please, accept it" breaks my heart evry time. He's literally begging Nana to take that present which Ren wanted to give her but didn't manage to, he wants Ren to be happy wherever he is in that moment, knowing that his wish has been fulfilled.

So, after all this recap of Kinoshita's moments, I think we can say that he's not only a mere assistant for Ren, but he's also a friend. His feelings for Ren are sincere, he doesn't praise him because he wants to keep his work, he praise him because he sincerely admire him. Kinoshita knows Ren needs and try to help him as much as he can, not only with his work but even more with his personal life. And if we consider all the times he has said something and Ren hasn't taken him seriously, but later realized how much he was right, we can say that Kinoshita's role in the story is to be Ren's "voice of conscience", that voice we all have inside us that says to us what is the right thing to do (but we often ignore it like Ren did). Kinoshita is a sort of mixture between Yasu and Nobu: he gives Ren the same advices as Yasu would have given him and he admire him like Nobu did. I think this is a good thing for Ren, because now that he's not a member of Blast anymore he doesn't have much time to see his old and true friends (not that Naoki and Reira aren't his friends but...well, in my opinion they can't be compared to Yasu and Nobu), so having Kinoshita near is like having a part of his friends with him all the time.

I hope this super long post hasn't annoyed you and I hope now we can all love Kinoshita together because he deserves a lot of love for what he did ♥.

Nana Week 2021 Day 1 Prompt: side character

[mostly-mundane-atla]

Well I got at least two people interested (@esmeralda-anistasia and @deathsmallcaps) so why not.

Quick disclaimer: I understand that some fans can be very sensitive to this topic and take general criticisms as personal attacks and jump to the defensive. Please don't justify your ships to me if you have that reaction to anything said in this post. It's not my business and if I'm honest I really don't care. Your experiences are not mine and will not change mine and nothing I'm about to say is meant to be read as an insult.

Okay onto the rarepairs in question!

I was ten years old when the episode Zuko Alone first aired and Ursa fascinated me. She was so elegant and sweet, and yet the implication was that she was also capable of assassination. Her disappearence and the fact everyone involved kept pretty hush-hush about her gave her character an air of mystery and Zuko's memories involving her made him a great deal more interesting and sympathetic (i still rolled my eyes every time he showed up and thought he didn't deserve all the cute moments with Mai until The Day of Black Sun, and even then still thought Jet was cooler in every way, but you can't please them all). She had quickly become a favorite character and I've held onto that adoration for about 15 years now.

I also really wanted her to kiss Hakoda.

They had compatible personalities and deserved some luck in love after all the heartbreak and trials, and they both loved their children despite having to leave. Ursa was never treated as dead, just gone. She could have been anywhere and there was nothing to say she couldn't have crossed paths with Hakoda and his men.

There was also something about it I didn't quite have the words or media exposure to explain. Often, in fandom or canon, if a relationship is biracial, the partner who is fairer-skinned and/or of the dominant or invading culture, who the audience sees themselves in, is the man and the one who is darker-skinned and/or marginalized or colonized is the woman (heteronormativity got a head start on this one). There's a lot of ugly "taming the savage" rhetoric in this, usually paired with blatant misogyny that's supposed to be in the woman's favor (like suggesting that a woman could only be complicit in this culture because it was what she was told and didn't know any better). The woman's family and friends who oppose this are depicted as unfairly prejudiced against this strange man as if their distaste for people who can be or have been responsible for things like genocide or subjugation is the same as the other side seeing these people as deserving of genocide or subjugation for the crime of not being like them. Sometimes it's the other way around, where the partner seen as "more civilized" is the woman and the one seen as "less civilized" is the man, in which case the woman is often abducted or otherwise the man's defining feature is his brutishness. This supposed brutishness is both intimidating and attractive to the oh so delicate if a bit repressed captive/wife (as well as the audience) and can manifest as being fiercely protective of her, which is how he shows his affection if there is a language barrier between them. And if you grow up Native, this is easy to pick up on and often in the back of your mind, because at least 90% of your media representation likely has some aspect mentioned above.

(Man that was a lot of academic style analysis)

But the dynamic between Hakoda and Ursa wouldn't leave room for any of that. Hakoda, as an absent parent backstory, is defined by having to leave despite how much he loved and would miss his children. Ursa, as an absent parent backstory, is defined by the crime she was willing to commit for her children (for Zuko specifically, but how long would it actually take for Azula to shoot her mouth off at the wrong place and time and also be targeted by Azulon?). Ursa was the one whose willingness to kill sent her fleeing into the night. The culture of her nation betrayed her and made her choose between her own safety and that of at least one of her children. Hakoda is charismatic and a good leader, but he is also soft spoken and understanding, and above all else, gentle. He isn't here to hurt innocents. He's here to see to it that the next generation of his people will not fear invaders or raids or even know that snow can be black from soot. And he's someone Ursa can finally feel safe around and confide in, and she could be the same for him. Someone he doesn't have to be the leader for, to whom he can admit that he just wants to be home and let the tears fall.

I'm honest enough to admit that one of the reasons I liked The Search was that Ikem wore his hair a lot like Hakoda did and that was close enough to it being canon for me.

Another one is Jin/Smellerbee. Something about their personalities strikes me as being so wonderfully harmonious and I like to imagine Jin, smooth-talking and streetwise but still the most genuine person, being the one to sit Smellerbee, who never really got a chance to think about these things, down and explain that anything she might be is okay. That it's okay to not be in love with a guy friend who gave her a purpose and loyal companionship. That it's okay to like girls. That she can have more than one partner. That it's okay to be different from what's considered normal and proper and not have an easy word to describe it. And eventually she'd realize it's true. And eventually she'd realize that she wasn't teasing when she called her beautiful in a wild sort of way.

I also like to think that Smellerbee clearly has more specialized fighting skills and is very good at what she does but Jin is strong enough to bench press her no problem. And Smellerbee acts all tough (because she is) but blushes whenever Jin calls her cute or pretty because she's not used to it.

Sometimes Longshot is involved too. Not as a third wheel or the exact same kind of partner, more like a ghibli style relationship with Smellerbee. Like is it a gentle romance? Is it an intimate friendship? It's love and they know that and don't have to define it by others' perception. And Jin gives Longshot kisses so he doesn't feel left out, which gets him a bit bashful because she really could have anyone, she already has Smellerbee of all people, and she still finds him deserving of a peck on the cheek. They probably all bunk together.

This actually started from a fic I wrote but don't intend on posting more than snippets of. Basically, i was tired of a lot of fanfic tropes, especially those having to do with friends to lovers and soulmates (this world is not kind to aromantics and the last thing I wanted in my escapism was romance being established as a level up for relationships), so I wrote something to actively subvert all of them. Jet and Smellerbee were each convinced they owed the other a romantic relationship after all they'd been through together, even though neither actually wanted it, because that's how all the stories go. So after he dies, she remembers all those times that would have been romantic if either was actually interested, but were instead just uncomfortable because it was entirely social convention and no feeling. But then she comes across Jin, who she's never met before, but who takes her in her arms and reassures her and sympathizes with her, and in this tiny apartment in this seedy side of town, she feels safe. She seeks permission for every touch and kiss and tells her this encounter doesn't have to be anything she isn't comfortable with. And when Smellerbee has to leave, Jin insists she take a candle to light her way, and winks when she says she can return it the day after. She gives her an excuse to visit again. And Smellerbee blushes and accepts it.

And then there's Teo/Haru and Teo/Ty Lee. No special reason I just think both would make a cute couple and want Teo to be happy. He's a good boy, more people should love him. Let him impress people with wheelchair tricks and get smooched.

[smediumsmeatbae]

Tremble (One Shot)

TITLE: Tremble PAIRING: Chris Evans x Reader  SUMMARY: Chris' anxiety throws him for a loop but you know how to make him feel better WORDS:  2.3 K SONG USED: Oh Baby by LCD Soundsystem WARNINGS: Mentions of anxiety, panic attacks, light angst (if you squint), SMUT SMUT SMUT (no one under 18, please!) A/N: This is my first for a couple of things. This is my first smut fic, constructive (read CONSTRUCTIVE) criticism is welcome. (Praise is awesome too lol.) And secondly, this is the first fic I've used with a song running through it. I really enjoyed writing this and loved using the song through it. It might be something I do again in the future.  This is also a submission for @jtargaryen18 's 30 Days of Chris. Thanks to her for hosting such a wonderful writing challenge and it's been super fun this whole month.  This is not to be posted anywhere else without my permission. Reblogs/likes/comments loved and encouraged.  Sort of been proofread. Any grammar mistakes are my own.

--------****--------

There was a hush in the air that night as you sipped your glass of bourbon out on the back porch of your Boston home you shared with your husband Chris. He was due home in a few hours and you couldn't wait to see him, so you were trying to distract yourself with your favorite spirit and a book that Scarlett had lent to you. You tried to focus on it, you really did. However, as you re-read the same sentence about five times, that was proving to be a fruitless venture. You let out a small huff of restlessness and placed the book down on the patio table before taking a quick sip of your drink and opened up your phone. Maybe catching up on some work emails could distract you enough. Before you could open up the email app, though, you noticed that you had a message. It was from Chris! You smiled and tapped on the icon to open up the message. 

CHRIS: Just touched down, got an earlier flight. Can’t wait to see you. Tour’s been rough. Should be there in about 20-30 mins. 

Your belly was full of butterflies as you read the message. He was going to be home! His arm around you! In twenty minutes! You tapped on the reply button. 

YOU: Yay! I missed you so much babe. Can't wait to see you too! ❤

It had been so long since Chris had been home. You missed the way he sang 80's pop music when he made pesto eggs in the morning, how the bathroom smelled vaguely of his cologne and soap - one of your favorite smells - after a shower, and how he would tickle you into submission after you had any argument with him. You also missed the way he caged his sculpted arms around your head and stroked your hair gently away from your face as he made love to you. God, how you missed sex with Chris; you craved it. Facetime was great, sure, and it helped temper the desire but it could only do so much. It couldn't give you the heat of his body melting into you or how he held you close, almost protectively, as you came down from your orgasm. You couldn't wait to feel him again and would probably jump him as soon as he got home. 

As if Chris could sense that you were thinking about him, you heard the door unlocking and the sound of keys being tossed on the entryway table as well as suitcases and backpack being set down in the foyer, making a noise on the hardwood floor. You excitedly went towards the noise to see your tired husband standing in the foyer.  

"Baby!" You yelled as you ran towards Chris. You threw your arms around his neck and drew him close to you as you nuzzled your cheek to his shoulder, smelling his cologne and feeling the soft fabric of his shirt on your cheek. He grabbed you back in turn and buried his face into your neck and clung onto you, taking fistfuls of your shirt into his hands. You noticed after a second, that his body was tense. He was also slightly trembling against your body and he was hanging onto you like you were his salvation. 

"Chris?" You asked gently, pulling away your face in concern. "Baby, what's wrong?" 

Oh baby You’re having a bad dream Here in my arms

You cupped his face in your hands. He easily was a head taller than you but in that moment, he seemed so small, like a scared little boy that needed to be protected and loved. His eyes were cloudy and glazed over- he looked like he hadn't slept at all last night. 

You came to me Could all be a bad thing And do you harm

"I'm… I'm ok, just really tired." He gave you a small smile but it wasn't working; you could see something was really bothering him. You knew your husband too well; that, and he was a terrible liar. He started to let you go and go back towards the foyer to grab his stuff and unpack from the press junket. 

"Babe, please. Talk to me. What's really going on?" You folded your arms around your waist and spoke to him, not judging, just wanting to understand and help. 

He slumped down and let out a sigh, stuffing his hands in his pocket. 

"I just… need to decompress for a second. Can we not talk about it for now, please?" His eyes were pleading with you and your heart broke a bit. You wanted to reach out and hold him but instead you nodded and dropped your hands from your waist as if to say you were giving in to his request. 

You run from me Shot in the dark Please wake me For my love lies patiently Please baby please

You had a feeling you knew what was going on. Chris had issues with anxiety and he said earlier the tour was rough, didn't he? How bad had it gotten? He was usually really good about keeping his anxiety in check with some form of meditation and relaxation. What happened? You followed Chris into the living room where he turned on the tv, wanting to get out of his head a bit. Sitting down next to him, you wrapped your legs under you and nestled yourself into his side, letting his arm drape over you. You felt his chest rising and falling, missing so very much this feeling of closeness that you had not had since he left one month ago. One long month. He absentmindedly kissed the top of your head and stroked your shoulder lazily with his thumb. It was like the anxious person that came in from the tour was gone and Chris, your Chris, was back. At least on the surface. You knew that he was trying his best to bury it for the time being until he was able to talk about it. 

You came to me Are you having a bad time? There in your home

"The junket was… A lot." He finally spoke after a long time. "There wasn't really any time for breaks, and they just kept pushing us with more and more and more interviews and meet ups and Q&As and pictures…" You could feel his body tense up the more he talked about it. "It didn't stop. And I did my best to push it down, I made a commitment to be there and I was going to see it through, but man that last day… yesterday. I just couldn't do it anymore. I had a panic attack in between one interview waiting on another and I had to get out of there." There was a hitch in his voice that wasn't there before and you moved from your position to  straddle him and hold him close. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you pushed your hands through his nape and massaged it, an act that instantly calmed him down. He let out a breath, seemingly one that he had been holding in for eternity, and wrapped his arms around you, nose nuzzled into the crook of your neck. 

Oh sugar Give in to me You're just having a bad dream

"Shhh, it's ok baby. I've got you." You cooed as you held him close. "Let it all out, I'm here love." 

He gripped onto you and you could feel your tshirt and neck becoming wet with tears as he quietly sobbed into your shoulder. Your big man; your confident, funny, passionate, smart, loving man was shaking in your arms. You cradled his head and rocked him from side to side, wrapping your legs around his torso to feel him closer, closer, closer to you. 

Oh but please Please shake me from my lovesick patient dream Please baby please And my love plays wait and see

He lifted his head up to you, lashes wet with tears and eyes still misty, kissed you softly. His hands unclenched from your shirt and they ran up your back, searching, needing, wanting to hold you. His eyes met yours, wordlessly asking and you nodded, needing to make this better, if only for a short while. You cupped your hands to his face, rubbing his cheeks with the pad of your thumbs and kissed him gently at first, then with more urgency. You opened your mouth and let your tongue explore his bottom lip before he opened his mouth for you to gain access. Tongues danced with each other for a bit, you moaning into his mouth. 

Chris was pulling at your over-sized shirt, and you obliged, lifting your arms up and letting him remove it. It was actually his old shirt, but you wore it, especially when he was out of town, because it smelled like him. With your shirt off, you reached for his as he unclasped your bra. You were so hungry for skin on skin contact, to feel his sculpted upper body next to yours. Soon, you were both bare chest to bare chest, your hands massaging the nape of Chris' neck while you licked and nipped at his collarbone, the fingers of your free hand playing in his chest hair. His hands were on your ass, grinding you up against him. You could feel the prominent bulge beginning to form in his pants and you melted from the sensation, matching his grinds with your own. 

“I missed you so.. Much.” He groaned into your ear as he squeezed your cheeks and buried his face into your breasts, kissing and sucking; marking you as his. 

“Oh, I missed you too baby.” You gasped out as your hands scratched his shoulders and down his back making him hiss. You felt your wetness soak your panties. “I’m here, Chris. I’m all yours, my love.”

You wanted to let him take the lead, take what he wanted from you. There would be time tomorrow for talking and kissing and exploring each other anew all day, but tonight you wanted to make his entire trip melt into a distant memory. You guided your hands down his magnificent pecs and abs to his belt buckle. He adjusted himself so that you could zip his pants down and get his hardness into your hands. You both moaned out when you cupped him into your hands. 

“Need you.” You heard him rasp out, nipping your jaw. You looked into his eyes and they were dark and lust blown. You nodded with a whimper, needing him just as much too, needed the familiar stretch that you had been longing for since he had left a month ago. 

With one arm, he lifted you up with ease, helping you off of the couch while you both got rid of the bottom half of your clothing. Chris eased himself back onto the couch and you had to restrain yourself from just jumping onto him as you straddle back over his waist. You took his head in your hands and crashed into his mouth with passionate kisses, with teeth and tongues and biting lips, fighting out for dominance on who was giving the better kiss. His thick arms were back around your waist and butt. You put your hands on his chest to steady yourself as you lifted yourself up and positioned yourself over his manhood. He helped guide you and in one swift move, you felt him inside, stretching you deliciously. You both moaned out, chests heaving at the sensation.

“Oh fuck baby.” Chris groaned as he bit down on your shoulder. “Feel so good… so tight for me.”

You started to move your hips, and Chris put his big hands on either side of your waist, guiding you up and down on his cock. Putting your hands on the back of the couch to steady yourself, you matched him thrust for thrust. Your forehead pressed against his lightly for a second as you kissed him again. He adjusted himself a little bit more on the couch so that he could hit you deeper and you shouted out as he hit your g-spot over and over.

“Oh god, Chris yes! Right there!” panting heavily you sped up your rocking. You were so close to ecstasy, and you could feel from the twitch in his cock as you moaned out his name that he was close too. He matched pace with you and slammed into you with all he had. 

“C’mon baby, cum for me.” His voice was low and intense. He took one hand off of your hip to dip down between your thighs and rub tight circles onto your clit with his thumb. That was all it took and you cried out, your whole body shaking and pulsing as you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him close to you. Feeling your walls grip around him was enough to push Chris over the edge as well and he let go, moaning out your name as his strong hands went up your back and pulled you down to him. 

Oh baby Lean into me There's always a side door Into the dark Into the dark, shh

Once both of your breathing had returned to normal you parted from his embrace and scooted off of him, feeling him slide out of you. You got up from the couch and walked into the bathroom for a wet washcloth to wipe up with. Finishing with that, you nestled down next to his side, running your hands across his naked torso, blissfully loving how his breathing was way more peaceful at that moment then when he came home. He pulled you close to him and dipped down to kiss your lips tenderly.

“Welcome home, Chris.” You sighed and ran your hands through his chest hair.

--------****--------

TAGS:  @angrythingstarlight  

[mellometal]

Hey, everyone.

I've tried to compose myself before making this post. This is a subject that I've touched on a little bit in posts, but I've never done a deep dive into JUST this topic. I was going to make a post solely about this subject sooner, but this one in particular is really hard for me to talk about without getting emotional...and yet Dhar Mann has talked about this on quite a few occasions in the most insincere, toxic ways. I'll do my best to discuss this topic without getting too emotional.

It's about a serious subject that people still are ignorant about and don't take seriously. Even to this day, with the body positivity and body neutrality movements. (I don't know of a better way to describe just being neutral about your body. Sorry if it sounds weird.)

For anyone who doesn't know what I'm referring to (honestly, I don't blame you, as this is a subject that's often seen as normal and is encouraged in society for the most part), I'm talking about fatphobia. Hating on people for being fat. Discriminating people because of their weight in the workplace, at the doctor's office, just in general. Not many stores having inclusive sizes. People being treated like they're subhuman because they're fat.

I want to say this first, before I bash on Dhar Mann again: I'm a plus-size young woman. This is something that I have personal experience with. Your weight has no significance to your worth as a person. If you do happen to be overweight, obese, whatever, you're not subhuman. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You're worthy of being loved, listened to, treated with kindness, and respected, just like anyone else who isn't fat.

If you treat people like utter shit for their weight, get some help. Why do you care about somebody else's weight? Obviously there's an exception to this, like if they're so big they can't move or they're so skinny their organs are showing....because those are causes for concern, but other than that, mind your own business. Even if they are in those extremities, unless you're their doctor and/or their family, STILL mind your own business. How the fuck does a fat person simply breathing and existing affect you in any way? News flash: there will always be fat people.

Before I get to the weekly ritual of tearing TWO of Dhar Mann's videos apart (the next one will be in another post or I'll reblog this post and continue on there), here's an obligatory trigger warning for the video analysis itself and my response: The following post contains fatphobia, fat shaming, a man being super fucking misogynistic and treating women like they're objects, and there's even a touch of some racial aggression. How shocking. Because Dhar Mann really seems to get a kick out of writing about racism to make it all cute. Oh yeah, you're totally solving racism, Dhar Mann. /s

My response contains my experience with fatphobia, relationships with food, mentioned/implied thoughts of s3lf h@rm, feeling like I'm unworthy of being treated like an actual person because of my weight, and absolute rage. Like usual. My responses are very heated. This one especially. It's LONG. Buckle up.

With all this out of the way, let's get to the first video that I want to tear apart. This one is about the auditions for a record deal. I will get to the video about a kid wanting to be a host of a radio show later.

To sum up the first video, a plus-size white woman (Krissy Elliot) is singing for an agent (Isaac) and his assistant (Evette) so she can follow her dream to become a singer. Isaac cuts Krissy off to viciously bash her for being a plus-size woman. Evette stands up for this woman, and says she sounded fine and to let her finish. Isaac doesn't listen to Evette, let alone take what she said into consideration. He continues to ridicule Krissy for her appearance, that she'll "never make it in the music industry" (WRONG, do you know how many plus-size people are in the fucking music industry? There are A LOT more now than when I was growing up and it honestly makes me so happy. There were more plus-size people in the entertainment industry than in the music industry back then.), suggested that she "become a chef or a food critic" because she apparently loves being around food (being a chef or a food critic are noble professions, but NEVER fucking assume ANYONE'S relationships with food), to the point where Krissy left the room in tears.

Here are a few screenshots for context:

When this skinny, conventionally attractive woman (Jesse) comes in, Isaac's mood does a COMPLETE 180° and he's all sunshine and rainbows. Then right as soon as Jesse did her audition, Isaac is over the fucking moon, complimenting her physical appearance, treating her like an object, and signs her up for a record deal RIGHT AWAY. Pay attention to Isaac's facial expressions in one of these screenshots.

Evette suggests that they sign Krissy for a record deal instead. Because she was "the best singer they've had all day". Isaac, still all hot and bothered by a skinny, conventionally attractive woman that he's treating like an object, tells Evette that people like Krissy don't make it in the music industry because they're "overweight and unattractive", and is verbally aggressive towards her when she does nothing but explain her stance. Isaac sees this as Evette "talking back" (remember how I mentioned that there's racial aggression? He says that Evette is "talking back" because she happens to be a black woman) and fires her. He signs Jesse a record deal and has a blast with her.

The award ceremony comes around, and they're picking a winner for Best New Artist. They pick the winner, and it's....guess what? You'll never get it! It's Krissy Elliot! Why? Because Evette became her agent after Isaac fired her. Krissy goes into her whole story about how she was laughed out of every single agency and that she worked hard. Good for her. Jesse is obviously very happy for Krissy. We gotta love women supporting women.

This video was again another dumpster fire. As usual. Like I said, with this video in particular, I couldn't get through the first thirty seconds the first time around. Because I've dealt with shit like this. Obviously not with the music industry because I don't even think I'd be good enough to step into an agency...but I mean in my personal life.

Being told by my own dad that he was "tired of buying bigger clothes for me" when I was a young teenager, despite him buying almost nothing but "junk food".

Having my abuser make comments about my weight and talking about diets while I'm trying to eat my food, despite her being overweight.

Having someone I know (not anyone I'm friends with) make a comment about me eating a few things (ONE small piece of broccoli, two baby carrots, a small handful of chips, and ONE small piece of pineapple) and said to "save some for everyone else", even though I was saving food for everyone else, which is why I took so little. She tried to justify it with the fact nobody was there yet (why do you think I took very little food?), and she "was saying that to everyone" (why did she look at ME when she said that instead of making it clear that she was talking to everyone [saying "Hey, everyone" before the comment about saving some for everyone else IS NOT HARD]?), even though I know it was just to save her own ass. I knew she said that to me because I'm plus-size. She didn't say anything to anyone else, nor did she make it clear that she was talking to everyone.

Another person I know (not a person I'm friends with) saying that I overreacted (I did not overreact; SOMEONE TRIGGERED ME and you did NOTHING about it) even though they all KNEW my relationship with food is complicated. They KNEW that I don't really like eating in front of other people. I was upset that someone MADE A FUCKING DISGUSTING, TRIGGERING COMMENT ABOUT ME EATING VERY FEW FOOD ITEMS, ALMOST ALL WERE HEALTHY, DESPITE OTHER PEOPLE EATING A LOT MORE THAN I DID AND PICKING AT EVERYTHING. That day, I was begging one of my friends (one of the people I trust to eat around) to PLEASE take me home because I didn't want to be there (never wanted to be there in the first place), I was tired (I worked all night the night before and was forced to go to a meeting before all this happened), I didn't feel comfortable there anymore, there were way too many people (four individuals plus all their staff from another house were in the house I work in), I couldn't breathe (I was either about to pass out, have a panic attack, or just start crying), but nobody listened to me. I ended up getting a bus to go home.

(Sorry about all that. I was trying not to get emotional in this post. I just needed to share how this can affect people.)

Onto my response, which is all in the screenshots below.

ETA: I know the screenshots for my response are very jumbled right now and it’s difficult to read. I apologize to anyone who’s unable to fully read it! Because this is part one of this whole subject of fatphobia (I’m making a post about the boy wanting to become a radio host very soon), my response here will tie into that post. My response to that video is vastly the same, despite not making a comment on that video as of right now (the radio host one). 

I’ll be typing out my full response here. I apologize for weird formatting. Instagram wouldn’t let me break up my response into paragraphs. I’ll break them up into paragraphs here instead.

CC (Combination of the first, second, and third screenshots, aka, the first part of my response):

 I have a few questions before I get into my thoughts on this video. One, how the hell does your weight have any significance on your worth as a person, and if you do think this way, why would you think that? Two, do you know that fatphobia is a lot more than just judging a person for being fat? Three, why do you feel like you can speak for fat people like myself with this piss poor excuse for a video that I could barely get through the first thirty seconds of the first time? 

You can’t speak for any of us. I can’t speak for every fat person because not everyone has the same experiences as me. 

I’ve been bullied for my weight in real life as well as online. People have called me ugly just because of my weight. By the way, your weight doesn’t equal beauty, and that’s what I’m still learning. Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. 

On quite a few occasions, I have actually thought about doing dangerous things to my body that I don’t feel comfortable going into here. All because I had people try to boil me down to my weight, call me ugly, and destroy whatever self-esteem I had left. You don’t know what fat people go through, so don’t act like you do. 

There are many factors that go into why a person may be fat, including medical conditions, mental illness, trauma, genetics, etc. All of those things are none of your business unless those people decide to be open about it. 

No, it’s not always healthy to be fat (obviously there are extremities on both sides of the spectrum of weight that are extremely unhealthy), but it doesn’t make a person any less of a human being. Fat people are human too. Quit treating us like we’re not. We deserve to be treated like everyone else who isn’t fat. I’m not saying put all fat people on a pedestal. I’m saying treat us like human beings.

CC (Combination of the fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh screenshots, aka, the second part of my response):

Remember how I said that fatphobia isn’t just about judging people for being fat? Well, there’s the “fat tax” on plus-size clothing (even though it maybe only costs a little bit more in fabric, if there’s any difference in making clothes for people who aren’t fat), limited styles for fat people in stores (making a lot of us have to buy fast fashion or have to spend a fortune on clothes that actually flatter us), not very many stores have inclusive sizes still (if you don’t at least carry max 5XL or a size 38/40 in pants size, you cannot call yourself inclusive), and a lot of other things.

Many fat people, myself included, are afraid to seek medical attention for anything (even checkups) because of doctors who only focus on our weight and not on what we came in to see them for. They write it off as if our weight is the sole cause of our problems, which isn’t always the case.

How about we talk about how expensive it is to eat healthy in a lot of places? Not everyone can afford to make fresh meals every day, let alone once a week. Maybe they were never taught how to due to their upbringing. You don’t know.

I’ve had people comment on my weight, what I’m eating (even if I’m eating something healthy like fruits and veggies), talk about my weight or diets EVEN WHILE I’M TRYING TO EAT, and it’s caused me to wait until I’m alone or around someone I trust to eat anything. As a result, I have a complicated relationship with food now.

Telling someone they’re fat doesn’t help them. They know that. They see themselves every day. People may want to change, but they either are afraid to ask for help, or they don’t know where to start. Some may not want to change. It’s up to them, honestly. If you want to help them lose weight, maybe suggest any physical activity they’d have fun doing and do them with them? I dance for fun. Also, you could help set up meal plans with them. 

If you’re not going to at least try to help them lose weight if you’re so concerned about them (this is all if they actually want to change things and don’t know where to start), I cannot say this in a sweeter way: shut your mouth and mind your own business. Because you’re just being a cunt at that point.

CC (eighth screenshot, aka, the third and final part to my response):

There are quite a few plus-size people in the entertainment industry as a whole who are/were very successful. Remember the late Chris Farley and Aretha Franklin? Chris Farley was big, but that didn’t change how great of an actor he was, how funny he was, or how much of an impact he made in the entertainment industry. Aretha Franklin was a plus-size black woman in the music industry, but she’s inspired SO MANY artists we have today! There are many plus-size men, women, and I believe even nonbinary people in the public eye in general. Like I’ve said, beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. That’s why the body positivity and body neutrality movements are a thing.

(I know I implied that I thought about sh here in my response, but please don't worry about me as far as that goes. I'm fine now. I would never go through with anything like that.)

In the last part of my response where I mentioned some plus-size people in the entertainment industry as well as the music industry (the late Chris Farley and the late Aretha Franklin), I was going to name more people, but my comments were getting too long. I'll name some more here off the top of my head:

Lizzo (rapper), the Piggy Dolls (the first K-Pop girl group made up of actual plus-size women), K*v*n Sp*c*y (I don't feel comfortable saying his name because he's a disgusting person, but he's another plus-size man...he was in King of Queens and in A LOT of movies), PSY, Greyson Gritt (a genderqueer person in the music industry), Elle King, Produce Pandas (the first music group in China full of plus-size men), Martha Wash, Chubby Checker, Fats Domino, Big Angel (a J-Pop group of all plus-size women), Chubbiness (another J-Pop group of all plus-size women), Pottya (another J-Pop group of all plus-size women)...there are so many that I found, but if you want to add more plus-size artists, plus-size actors, plus-size comedians/comediennes, feel free to add them in the comments!

Dhar Mann, you'll never know what plus-size people go through. You don't know what we go through. You have NO IDEA what we go through on a daily basis. Stop acting like you do. Because you don't, and you never will.

By the way, Dhar Mann, this will NOT be the last post I'll make about you or your videos. The more you make fucking deplorable, poorly written bullshit, the more posts I'll make! Teehee!

If you got this far, thank you so much. The next part of this is coming very soon. I'm sorry for not posting too many screenshots from the video. I wanted to fit in my response because it's important for people to see.

Have a good day/afternoon/night, y'all. Love you!