#i'm so tired but i wanted to ramble lmao

[cursedfortune]

It's easy to just go, "Haha, her spell of regeneration is so capable" but I like to think about the nuances of it. The amount of years it took to become desensitized to cuts, bruises, being stabbed, shot with various projectiles. And even with that, she isn't immune to pain - she has just grown to have a very high pain tolerance. To the point she can become maddened/manic by either feeling almost nothing or when she is still experiencing pain in combat. There's no winning.

Being set on fire still hurts her. Between the trauma of what she endured from a young age to the fact fire is effective, it has been something she cannot truly become desensitized to. Just endure. Fire, like acid and certain venoms/poisons, constantly push back on her spell. So it's just a matter of her spell winning out over time or her taking care of the passive damage.

I don't write this as 'Mortem can't feel pain for the most part' but more-so, 'Mortem can feel pain, she's just hardened to a lot of it'. Softer touches and gentle things she notices instantly because that's not the norm. You may as well be touching raw nerves. She is used to a harsh touch but not fingers ghosting over her forearm. The effect it has on the nerves differs from what she's used to.

When Mortem forged her spell of regeneration, it was her in her youth. She accounted for a lot of aspects to it, but certain nuances and consequences still made it through. Her spell gave her a high metabolism which should make her warm, but constant cell regeneration contributes to her feeling colder to the touch.

Mortem may have built a terrifyingly useful spell, but it has a single weakness that can be exploited and undo everything. That being said, despite this spell, it is really because of her willpower to endure and overcome that has made her into such a formidable force.

When she realized her physical limitations, she took to integrating aspects of the beasts that dwelled within her forest to empower herself. Her abilities are primarily to serve her purpose and not be offensive, but she has pushed herself to be able to weaponize herself because the world needed the witch to fight. Because some souls had to be put to rest despite not wanting to. If it's something needed for her purpose, Mortem can adapt to learn it. Sometimes it's a permanent change to herself, like tattooing an open gate to all energy/magic on her chest. Other times it's temporary abilities she borrows by forging a spell and then relinquishing it once her spell is cast and done with.

The entire subject of Mortem being desensitized with many kinds of pain and her being sensitive to lighter touches is also especially important. It ties into her core ability of energy manipulation - which involves the soul. Souls and bodies are interwoven, what affects one will affect the other so varying degrees. It has been an ugly journey. At times, it was her soul that willed her to become desensitized to pain. At other times, it was her body being in such agony that maddened her into numbness until desensitization was forced upon her. A lot of this was done at the hands of witch hunters or her enemies in war - a portion of it, however, she did to herself in order to experiment and learn her own limitations.

Witches will always be products of the world state and in return, the world state will be a product of witches. She will become whatever is needed to carry out her specific purpose, no matter the morality or how seemingly impossible it is. It may sound like there's a lot Mortem can do, but that's not at all accurate. There's a lot she has the potential to do, but that doesn't mean she can do it unless there's no alternatives. She can't do elemental magic beyond calling a storm, but if she needs it - she'll either have to get help or forge a spell.

There's a running joke that Mortem loves heights and wishes she could fly, but her purpose has no reason for such an ability. So she just SIGHS over it. If there's no reason, it serves no purpose to her directive. Everything Mortem has done to herself has been carved into her, it's tattooed across every inch of skin that's not visible with her usual dresses. Everything she has done to herself is linked. Stacked. It makes it difficult to topple her over but if one ever learned the way to, the entire thing known as Mortem would come crumbling down and shatter.

While her strengths are very useful that doesn't change the fact the consequences for her abilities exists. If you learn what to do and manage to succeed defeating her, you can absolutely one shot Mortem out of the realm of the living. It was audacious she made these rules for herself but it was necessary. She isn't immortal. She doesn't want to be immortal. Her spell if good, it keeps her alive to serve her purpose. But she is part of the wheel, the cycle, the natural balance. Being fallible is that. You can imprison her, hurt her, put her out of commission temporarily or permanently - all of this matters in how she designed herself. She is a reflection of the world's needs and later the needs of the cosmos. Which is all the more reason her nickname is the Bride of the Universe (which she doesn't approve of still lmao).

[doubleedgemode]

Happy summer, everybody!

This has been a big project to take and while there's stuff to improve I'm pretty happy with it. Be sure to zoom in the big picture for details and read the comic from left to right. (Needless to say, please don't try A.B.A's behaviour.. For your safety)

Bonus doodle:

[4lph4kidz]

honestly hilarious how many punches ive been pulling for fear of coming off wrong wrt fucking homestuck of all things but it's not just lame cowardice on my part like i think since bearing witness to the kind of insane fandom discourse that existed 2016-2020 i'm half convinced i'll be skinned alive if i imply something strange or unsavory about somebody's blorbo. but actually no that makes it sound like there will be tangible consequences for mildly irritating someone on the internet which isn't true generally speaking it's just the rsd/ocd and i need to get over the idea of people not liking me

[fightingmonsterswithwords]

(this is just me overthinking stuff for fun)

Genuine question from someone very ignorant about many things lote-related in this fandom... what are the other Deadly Sins?

Because I was checking Paradise Lost *for reasons* (fic reasons, and the pic is not necessary but there you go) and... like, we all know Luci supposedly didn't fell alone.

(....) what time his pride Had cast him out from Heaven, with all his host Of rebel Angels (...)

A little further down, the poem mentiones at least Beelzebub as being one of those that fell with him. (I'm not reading much more right now.)

And I know - I know - these are different works and there's a million others to nitpick from, and that Hazbin pretty much takes all this imagery and does its own thing with it, but I'm bored and sleep-deprived. So I'm asking myself - why couldn't they be angels that fell along with Lucifer? (Except that we see Luci and Lilith falling alone in Charlie's recounting of the story, even if that's an abridged version of their family history, yeah, like I said... I'm bored).

I guess anything about it is total speculation because the wiki merely states they are "a class of Demons who, aside from Lucifer Morningstar himself, rank directly beneath the royal family in Hell's hierarchy", and that they're Princes of Hell as per Binsfeld's classification of demons, so maybe Hellborns like the Ars Goetia who are technically royalty.

But also the Seven Deadly Sins are supposedly not Hellborn? And why would they hold more or less the same status as Lucifer, as to be entrusted to oversee the other Rings? Did he create them? Where do they came from? So yeah, they look nothing like Luci and they have demonic forms, no wings like his, etc... but I think I like the headcanon that they fell along with him and Lilith 🙄 (and that would add a whole new layer of angst to Lucifer who would feel guilty for dragging them with him). And they're like family (this I have seen represented in varying ways already, anyway).

If this is mentioned somewhere I honestly can't remember.

[buttercup-barf]

Under the cut are mostly self-insert doodles of decreasing quality. Again, not much directly tied to Team Fortress 2. Might as well toss these out while I have no access to my puter. Much yapping under the cut and in the tags incoming.

Another self-insert, this time less of a "here's me as a tenth class" and more of a "here's my game experiences translated into the class I would take the place of". The Cleaner. Although I guess they could still be wearing either suit. It doesn't matter that much.

That one Convict's Case taunt with Backup would be extremely funny, because the man would be on the verge of a breakdown (he does not want to go to jail so bad you have no idea). The second image- I owe no explanation. You know what I am. You see the pattern with my favourites.

The duality of the man. Resting face versus "just heard you express interest in religion/Russian folklore" face. He's not that hard to make friends with, when you pull him away from all the explosions.

Some doodles of trying to figure his face out. Unfortunately, the more I stare at him, the more I worry that he looks like A Certain Guy With The Last Name "Kazarin", and the fear of never being original in my life caught up to me.

Don't look at me, don't perceive me, I refuse to explain any of my actions to you.

[bigmeansweatydyke]

i honestly wish i knew more dykes irl because yeah i love all my friends but sometimes i just don't wanna be around or hear about men lol. like i just wanna chill with other lesbians and not even think about someone's lame ass boyfriend showing up or having to hear about whatever ugly dumbass dude someone is with

[wandersee]

me all of last week: why tf am i even more exhausted/fatigued than normal all i can do is go to jobs and then go to sleep and i can't even focus on it think about ANYTHING

me yesterday: *realizing I haven't taken my be-less-sleepy med for an entire week* Ahhhh... right...

[daxite]

i think some of you guys are looking way too fucking deep into the shitty minecraft movie lol

[leon-on-the-froggy-chair]

ranting abt personal life stuff because i have fRUSTRATIONS, to be deleted.

I love being treated like an annoyance because of my stances on companies and brands and my choices to not purchase or support my friends/family in purchasing from them and getting told off about how I'm a poseur and should put my energy into something more important and how I'm cringe. By mfs who cant live without buying chic fil a and starbucks and then TELLING ME like

bruh. dawg.

OOoOOo how dare i dont wanna eat mid chicken and prefer to make coffee at home

[nugatorysheep]

Sometimes I think about how, back when the roster was much bigger, me and my old friend group all picked out WTL characters that we thought the others were the most like, and almost universally people thought Druid was the most like me. That probably should've been my first clue that none of them knew a single thing about me, but hindsight is 20/20

I also often think about how, after several days of going through things that had happened to me over the last four or so years, I was told 'You seem like a person who wants to be understood', and it hit me that until then, I had never met someone who ever really got me. Now that I have, I could never settle for less.

[piplupod]

it really is kind of crazy how much lifelong abuse warps your nervous system's idea of safety and comfort. like I'm still living with my abuser(s) but every time i get home from the centre where they treat me kindly, i feel some kind of fear as if I've done something wrong while I was out but also this vague relief to be back at the place where abuse happens. it's so strange. i have such a wonderful time in a place where they listen to me and are interested in what i have to say and they treat me with kindness and respect, and then I come home to this hell house and I immediately feel ill but relieved because all of the niceness I'd just experienced feels so wrong, but now i'm back where i am hurt so that is comfortable. its what is known and expected.

it really is like abuse is just... what is comfortable for me. and I hate that. when I'm around people who treat me kindly I am always waiting for the metaphorical other shoe to drop, and also having to control my urge to ruin it purposefully before I ruin it accidentally. like some part of me sometimes wants to goad people into being angry at me because that feels like it's what is Supposed To Happen.

[mementoasts]

jonathan sims head archivist of the magnus institute london

[barkingangelbaby]

dude...

[itisdreamcatcher]

as somebody who grew up with Holly Hobbie and Friends and LOVED it, I can't understand why people (especially in my close circle) are weirded out/amazed by me liking cottage core and dark academia and being kind and friendly, even if I don't know the person. is it so weird to give the person a chance to understand them and see all their colours? is it a sin to do that? not immediately judge them and write them off? YES, I will give a random person a chance or smile at them, not because I think I should or am better than them but because I think people lack the kindness in this time of the world. I will be the person to just smile and emit warmth because I choose to. yes, I can judge everybody, everywhere but what is the point of that? it brings me the negativity and ruins my day, vibes and mood. is it not beautiful when you're at a cafe and you see that somebody might be stressed so you smile at them and tell them to take their time because OH GOD how many different people have been here before me and have you even taken a break and do you need a glass of water and just HOW ARE YOU? and when they hear you and register what you said, their shoulders are slumped and their jaw relaxes and they have a softer look in their eyes and they smile back and go to do their job and seeing them visibly relax makes you happy because oh god they might've needed that because have you ever had that one time when you were extremely stressed and you just couldn't deal with anyone or anything but you had so much on your plate and just AAAHHHHHH!!! I CANNOT ANYMORE!!! and then somebody, doesn't have to be anyone you know well or even at all, is kind to you or they talk to you for a bit and their energy recharges you so you're ready to continue with whatever you needed to do and you feel ten times lighter and you're just grateful and happy. is it so hard to be kind? or at least, refrain from being a jerk? if your day is ruined, you don't have to ruin other people's day. write about it. talk about it. draw it. go for a walk. drink water. or coffee. or juice. or sit outside and look at the clouds. or take a shower.

if you feel bad, do something for yourself that will make you feel better, instead of ruining the mood of other people. and if you like ruining the good vibes, then I'm sending you a hug and, please, for everyone's sake, GET A LIFE.

new cool is being kind.

[mieczyhale]

one of the guys that runs a reaction channel i've been watching for ages just announced that they're ending the channel next year bc he got a job offer and he's getting married and he's thinking about his family and his future and like...

my son in christ you are 21

i literally want to fucking die

[ryoukio]

you know when you're driving home from work and it's dark out, and you're listening to music from your Bluetooth speaker because your cd player is broken and your window is down to let some of the hot air out from the heater you have on to stop the windscreen from fogging up, and a song your long distance friend you've never met in person comes on and you can't picture their face but you can feel them sitting in the passenger seat singing the lyrics just as badly as you are, just as pained as you are and you think about how much you love them as your friend, you love them to pieces, and how you wish that you could see the same stars when you look out your window but they've never seen the southern cross hang along the horizon and you wish you could show them how big the emu is in the sky..?

Yeah.