#i'm not fucking playing monopoly with you i don't fucking care who you are i'm not fucking doing it that's the fucking line

[fictional-worlds-are-exquisite]

do you want to come over to teach me your favourite card/board game so we can play it together orrr

[frenchkisstheabyss]

⛧ 𝙽𝚊𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚊𝚕 𝙱𝚘𝚛𝚗 𝙺𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚛𝚜 𝙸𝙸 ⛧

⛧ Pairing: poly!slasher!minsung x chubby!fem!reader

⛧ Genre: slasher au/horror/angst/smut

⛧ Summary: It's Halloween 1996, you've just broken up with your toxic ex, and there's a killer on the loose. When you go to the local video store to find your next distraction, you run into your longtime crushes who have their hearts set on looking after you. But you must be careful. Not everyone's who they appear to be.

⛧ Word Count: 2.k-ish

⛧ Warnings: If you don't like horror turn back now. This isn't graphic by any means but there are horror elements! Slight sadomasichism, full blown yandere vibes, mentions of toxic ex, mention of dead body w/ tame description, shallow knife wound (you don't get stabbed. no worries), knife/blood play, a lil smut because there's kissing/fingering/nipple play, pet names (babe, baby) a threesome happens but is only referenced, slasherfucker reader, reader's kinda losing it

⛧ A/N: This is part 2 in a series. I linked the first part in the summary. Part 1 was dark and fluffy while this one is really dark and angsty. There's still romance but said romance is kinda psychotic. For the record, I'm in no way encouraging you to go out and have sex with two psychokillers. But if they're Minsung hot? I meaaaaan....

💀 <<< Rewind to Tape 1 or Keep Going to Tape 3 >>> 💀

Han laughs, bringing his arms around your waist, “Oh but sweetie, we’ve played your game. Don’t you wanna play ours now?”

Street Fighter is a game. Monopoly is a game. Minho forcing you to hold a knife to his throat in the middle of their kitchen? This is unlike any game you’ve ever played before. Against your better judgment, you throw caution to the wind and ask the million dollar question.

“And what are the rules to this game of yours?” 

Minho clicks his tongue, delighted at your morbid curiosity, “It’s simple really. If I can make my lips touch yours without the blade slitting my throat open I get a kiss.” 

“And if he doesn’t—” Han muses, “I’m down a roommate I suppose.” 

“Kiss or death, baby” Minho says, leaning into the tip of the blade so that it's agonizingly slow to witness. He stops when it pricks his skin, a scarlet drop of blood rising to the surface. Your fingers tremble around the handle of the knife, your body running ice cold at the realization that this is actually happening. 

“You’re both fucking psycho!” you shout, twisting free of them with reckless abandon. You stumble backward into the kitchen counter, the blade still in your hand. When you regain your footing you notice tiny droplets of blood decorating the white tile floor. You trace their source to the much larger cut in the side of Minho’s neck.

Han stares at you with a Milky Way galaxy of stars dancing behind his eyes, “So she does have it in her.” 

Time itself seems to come to a halt when you register what you’ve done. You hadn’t meant to do it but, accident or not, you did it. “Oh god, no, I didn’t mean it. I’m so sorry. I…I���” you stutter, tossing the knife into the sink. Minho takes a deep breath, running his fingers across his wound as he approaches you. “It’s okay. I’ll live” he smirks, applying blood to his lips like some luxurious lipstick, “Now about that kiss.” 

Minho’s close enough to you that you can feel his shallow breaths against your face. His bottom lip brushes yours and your mouth falls open without hesitation. The voice of the girl you were before you came here whispers for you to run—leave this place and never come back—but it’s far too late for that. Minho locks you in a kiss, metallic and sweet, that makes you a stranger to yourself. 

It’s not you hungrily kissing Minho, blood staining his collar as he takes greedy handfuls of your plush body. It’s not your cheek that Han cups, tilting your head to the side to steal kisses and taste that last bit of blood on your tongue. Only…it is you and you’re loving every second of it. So much that when Han unbuttons your jeans, slipping a hand inside to tease your clit, you’ve already managed to soak through your panties.

“Aah, I knew it” he whispers, lightly stroking your entrance, “I told you she was the one. That she was special.” You moan into Minho’s mouth when Han’s fingers sink into you, your cries of pleasure echoing within his cheeks. “It’s true. You’re our special girl, aren’t you?” Minho hums, his thumb circling one of your nipples through your shirt. 

The praise goes to your head in the worst way, setting a once cold body ablaze with lust. Your walls contract with every mention of how special you are—of how long they’ve waited to have you here. Han’s never had his fingers this drenched before, his mind’s already running wild with thoughts of licking your juices from them once you come. The noises you make are so melodic, so splendid, that they'd burn them into their memories if they could.

Minho’s sharp eyes lock onto yours, fingers toiling away at the delicate hooks of your bra. “Can we keep you?” he asks like a demon masquerading as a child. Innocence with something darker lurking beneath, waiting to tear you to pieces. The answer comes easily, driven by your thirst to be devoured.

“Yes,” you moan, exhaling at the relief of being freed from your bra, “I’m yours.” Han licks up the side of your neck, softly nibbling at your earlobe as his fingers pick up speed.

“All ours,” he whispers, “Forever.” 

Grainy black and white dots dance across the TV screen, casting a white glow across the bed where you lay naked cuddled up beneath the blanket with Han’s childhood teddy bear. It’s 3AM and Camp Counselor Sleepover Murder Party 4 ended an hour ago. Not that you were paying an ounce of attention to it. Your focus was placed entirely on being bent into a series of unholy positions by the two men you expect to see when you open your eyes. But when you finally do—limbs still tingling from your last orgasm—they’re nowhere to be found.

Yawning, you force yourself up in bed, squinting at the light from the TV. Holding your hand up to shield your eyes, you notice the dried up blood on your fingertips. The events of the night come back to you gradually like a fuzzy radio signal sorting itself out. Your mouth is saturated with that same metallic taste from before, the sweetness of it having long faded. Finding it too nauseating to tolerate, you retrieve your underwear from the floor and set out in search of something to wash the taste away.

Stepping out into the hallway you find yourself in near pitch black darkness. The only guiding light is the glow of a lamp from the bottom of the staircase at the opposite end of the hallway. “Minho!” you call out, taking slow cautious steps down the hall. You extend your arms out on both sides, feeling around for anything you might bump into. You hold your breath, listening for even the faintest sound of his voice but it never comes. Finally reaching the staircase, you grab onto the sides and make your way down.

You call out again, this time trying another name for good measure, “Han! Where are you guys?” It suddenly occurs to you that this is the moment in slasher movies where the girl wanders downstairs and gets sliced up by some masked psycho killer. You stop halfway down the stairs, glancing up at the darkness you left behind. “Fuck that” you huff, jogging the rest of the way down the stairs to find safety in the light.

Finally you’re back in familiar territory. To your right you spot the kitchen and your heart jumps at the thought of the Halloween candy left untouched on the table. But your tooth rotting dreams are derailed by the sound of whirling somewhere to your left. You turn to spot a heavy wooden door left slightly cracked. It’d look like any other door if not for the two deadbolts drilled into the frame. Off to the side sits a black garbage bag, the kind contractors use on construction jobs, and it’s stuffed full of…something.

Hearing the low chattering of voices, you drift towards the door whispering to yourself the whole time. “Why are you freaking out? Nothing’s wrong. They’re probably just taking out the trash. Don’t be so—” You choke on your own words as you stare down into the trash bag. It is full of trash. There’s pizza boxes, empty soda cans, and crumbled up chips bags all from last night.

And then there’s something else.

The tip of something red poking out from between the pizza boxes. You lean in closer and make out deep wrinkles carved in plastic. Pinching the end of it you pull it from the trash and you feel even more nauseous than before. It’s a mask. Not just any mask. The same mask your ex had on when you saw him at the video store. A chill runs down your spine, making you let out an unexpected squeak that brings all of the background conversation to a halt.

“Hello?” Han’s voice rings out, seemingly from beneath you. You crack the door a little more, peeking in to find another set of stairs leading down into the basement. “Everything okay up there?” Minho asks, his tone oddly suspicious of you. You clear your throat, tucking the mask back into the trash bag, “I’m—I’m fine. Just got a little snack craving is all. Are you guys good?”

You’re met with silence reminiscent of the moment before Minho forced you to cut his throat. “Why don’t you come down?” Han insists, bubbling with joy, “We have a surprise for you!” You pull the door open all the way, shuddering at the creaking sound the old wooden stairs make when you step on them.

“A surprise? What kind of surprise?”

“One you weren’t supposed to see yet” Minho pouts, “But you’re here now so whatever.”

Minho’s adorable tendency to whine gives you the sense of normalcy you needed to get you to the bottom of the stairs. But when you reach it you wish you hadn’t. The basement is nothing like the welcoming warmth of the rest of the house. It’s pristine and white, the polished floor icy against your bare feet. In each corner there’s a large cabinet stocked with all sorts of medical supplies. It reminds you of an operating room in one of those medical dramas.

It is an operating room and at the center of it, in a pool of blood that leaks between the cracks in the tiles, is the partially dismembered body of your ex boyfriend. “Hi, baby” Han waves with the hand not currently holding a cordless saw. Still in his underwear, he’s dressed in a long black apron with the gloves to match. Minho’s dressed the same and both are slick with blood.

Before you can think better of it, you’re screaming at the top of your lungs and bolting back up the stairs. All the while images of torn flesh and fractured bone flash in your mind. You couldn’t stand that man, hated him in fact, but you’d never wanted to see him in pieces.

Spotting your purse by the front door, you make a mad dash for it clueless to the two figures gathering behind you. Your vision clouded with tears, you fight with the front door locks to get out. “I knew it was too soon” Minho sighs in disappointment, “We should’ve waited.” Han slips his gloves off, coming over to kiss you on the cheek.

Your body recoils, shaking in fear, “Don’t hurt me. Please.”

“Hurt you?” he scoffs, flipping the lock open, “I’d never hurt you. You just seemed like you needed a little help.”

Minho flops down in a chair near the door, messy hair falling in his face, “Take my jacket at least. It’s cold out.”

Their calmness is odd to say the least, making you reevaluate the fear that you feel. “You’re letting me go? Just like that?” Han plucks a wool trench coat from its hook, draping it over your shoulders. He pulls the door open and a slight autumn breeze blows through the door. “I told you. We don’t want to hurt you. We’re here to protect you...and maybe teach you how to protect yourself.”

His sincerity makes you uncomfortable and you feel yourself splitting in two again. This time the old you wins and throw yourself out into the night, scanning the street to find where you parked your car. The block is as dark as the upstairs hall, giving you the sense that you’re on some terrifying island all your own.

You can't make sense of why they’d let you go. Any normal person would drive straight from here to the police station. You know their faces. Their names. Where they work. Where they live. Do they want to get caught?

“You can’t run from who you are forever, pretty girl!” you hear Minho taunting. You look back to see them watching you from the doorway, smiling lovingly in your direction.

Minho winks at you, blowing you a kiss, “See you real soon, babe.” 

[thevoidstaredback]

Dick: Remember everyone, violence is never the answer.

Danny: You're right, Dick.. Violence can't be the answer.

Dick: Correct, Danny. Now, on to the next lesso-

Danny: Violence is the question.

Danny: And the answer is yes!

Dick: Danny, no!!

Dick: All right, Danny, that’s it, you’re grounded! I found a rap album hiding under your bed and it was the clean version. I didn’t raise you to be such a nerd!

Danny: I’m not even your kid-

Dick: I don’t care what anyone thinks about me.

Danny: Ok.

Dick: Wait, why such a muted reaction? Did that not sound cool?

Danny: Last night I found out Dick is a sleep talker.

Tim: Oh, really?

Danny: "The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell." Right. In. My. Ear. At 3am.

*Dick rushes by with an armful of water bottles*

Tim: What's going on?

Danny: Dick wouldn't drink water.

Tim: ...And?

Danny: And I asked him how fast he could chug an entire bottle.

Dick, loudly: 16 OUNCES IN TEN SECONDS, BITCHES!

Dick: Do you ever feel bugs on you when really there’s nothing there?

Danny: Those are the ghosts of the bugs you killed before.

Dick:

Dick: *sobs*

Tim: You fucking scared him, you idiot.

Dick: I hate to tell you this, but one of you was adopted.

Danny & Tim:

Danny: Only one...?

Danny: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming?

Dick: Can either of you please learn the skill called "Think Before You Speak"?

Tim: Ya know... it might be.

*Danny and Tim are fighting*

Dick, taking aspirin: I have a headache! Can you guys just be cool?!

*Danny and Tim start fighting while wearing sunglasses and riding skateboards*

Dick: Please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste

Danny: We got spring water

Dick: NO.

Danny: with EXTRA minerals

Danny: it's like licking a stalagmite

Dick: DON'T COME HOME.

Danny: Mmmmm cave water

Tim: Tell Danny about the birds and the bees.

Dick: They're disappearing at an alarming rate.

Batman: Listen, I can explain...

Tim!Robin: You’re making $500,000 and you’re only gonna pay me $30,000?

Nightwing: You’re getting 30 grand? I’m getting $1,000!

Phantom: You guys are getting paid?

Bruce: *Trying to fill out legal paperwork stuff* Were you guys born AMAB or AFAB?

Tim: Bold of you to assume I was born at all.

Danny: I personally was created in a lab.

Dick: I just straight up spawned lol.

Dick: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me?

Alfred: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it.

Dick: Three of us saw it, Alfred. How do you explain that?

Alfred: *points at Tim* Sleep deprivation. *points at Bruce* Paranoia. *points at Danny* Delusional personality disorder.

Tim: Why is Dick so sad?

Danny: He took one of those “Which Hero Are You?” quizzes

Tim: And...?

Danny: He got Batman

Dick, banging on the door: Danny! Open up!

Danny: Well, it all started when I was a kid...

Tim: No, he meant-

Dick: Let him finish.

Tim: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!

Danny: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD

Tim: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING DICK WITH ME

Dick, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.

Dick: Dandelions symbolize everything I want to be in life

Tim: Fluffy and dead with a gust of wind?

Dick: Unapologetic. Hard to kill. Feral, filled with sunlight, bright, beautiful in a way that the conventional and controlling hate but cannot ever fully destroy. Stubborn. Happy. Bastardous. Friends with bees. Highly disapproving of lawns. Full of wishes that will be carried far after I die.

Danny: edible

Dick: So, what, now I’m just supposed to do anything that Bruce does? I mean, what if he jumped off a cliff?

Tim: If Bruce were to jump off a cliff, he would’ve done his due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes. If you see Bruce jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff.

Dick: You jump off a cliff!

Tim: Gladly. Provided Bruce did first.

Danny: Why are you on the floor?

Tim: I'm depressed.

Tim: Also I was stabbed, can you get Alfred, please.

Dick: If you had to choose between Tim and all the money I have in my wallet, which would you choose?

Danny: That depends, how much money are we taking about?

Tim: Danny!

Dick: 63 cents.

Danny: I'll take the money.

Tim: Danny!!!

Danny: I'm incredibly fast at math.

Tim: Alright, what's 30x17?

Danny: 47

Tim: That's not even close.

Danny: But it was fast.

Danny: *Stubs his toe* FUCK!

Dick: Mind your language!

Danny: What else am I supposed to say, “Woe is I”???

Dick:

Danny: You have to accept that swear words are necessary sometimes.

Tim: Remember when you didn't try to solve all your problems with attempted murder?

Danny: Stop romanticizing the past.

Danny: Okay. I get it. You've had a really hard time lately, you're stressed out, seven people died-

Dick: Twelve, actually.

Danny: Not the point. Look, they're dead now and really whose fault is that?

Dick: Yours!

Danny: That's right: no one's.

Tim: I think I'm having a mid-life crisis.

Danny: You're like 15 years old

Tim: I MIGHT DIE AT 30!

Danny: I’d like to offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals.

Tim: Not trying to brag or anything, but I can wake up without an alarm clock now simply due to my crippling and overwhelming anxiety, so...

Dick: You can de-escalate any situation by simply saying, 'Are we about to kiss?'

Dick: Doesn't work for getting out of speeding tickets, by the way.

Danny: Physically, yes, I could fight a bird. But emotionally? Imagine the toll.

Tim: BEHOLD, the field in which I grow my fucks! Lay thine eyes upon it, and thou shalt see that it is barren!

Tim: What doesn't kill me should run, because now I'm fucking pissed.

Danny, threatening the others with a paintball gun: Listen... Life comes at us fast. We don't know what life is gonna give us... And today, it's gonna give you... a paintball!

Dick: I was born for politics. I have great hair and I love lying.

Danny, pre death: If I'm really as evil as you say I am, then have the gods strike me down where I stand.

*dies*

Phantom: Ha! Nice try, jackass! Next time, give it your A-game!

Shapeshifter: *transforms to look like Tim*

Tim: Okay, are you like BLIND? You look nothing like me. First off, I'm way taller. Secondly, I DO NOT look so sleep deprived and lastly, if you could drag comb through that hair you're like a 7 on a good day and I've been told I'm a constant 10.

Danny: Goodnight moon.

Danny: Goodnight tree.

Danny: Goodnight ghosts that only I can see.

Dick: People are always asking me if I'm a morning person or a night person.

Dick: And I'm just like, 'Buddy! I'm barely even a PERSON!'

Tim: You seem familiar, have I threatened you before?

[leclerc-s]

track 004. electric touch

─── ❝ i've got my money on things goin' badly, got a history of stories ending sadly ❞ ───

series masterlist // previous // next

APRIL 2017

DANIEL RICCIARDO AND MAX VERSTAPPEN RETURN FOR ON THE SOFA

comments

username these two share a special bond, i love it.

username max and daniel was a duo i didn’t know i need this bad.

username HE HAS A WHAT?

username danny, baby, this isn’t you. what about our 5 kids, our farmhouse, and 3 dogs?

username wonder who the slut is

username whoever this woman is, she’s not good enough for him.

username you don't even know who she is username he's not going to fall in love with you, he's not going to even like you if you keep shitting on his girlfriend you don't even know the name of username haven’t you heard? her name is casper

username everyone's shitting on his relationship but daniel seems genuinely happy. like geez, let the man be in love.

username daniel naming his girlfriend casper instead of using her actual name is such a daniel thing to do

username i was kind of expect joey or vegemite, something australian at least. casper’s gotta be an inside joke.

username daniel isn't dating daphne, but it would be hilarious if he would was because that means max and daniel could've been in laws and that's hilarious.

username that would've been so iconic. from being teammates to in-laws.

mae jones twitter is losing mind at this moment

daniel ricciardo why? i can't possibly assume why?

lewis hamilton didn't you just announce you're in a relationship with someone? i would assume that's why sebastian vettel he doesn't seem to care all that much

carlos sainz at least he didn't say who it was

max verstappen haven't you heard she's casper now? daphne jones i've disappeared from the media, i am casper, technically speaking.

mae jones it was smart of him to mention her as one of the friends he was hanging out with. people won't suspect her.

sebastian vettel i want to know how long this could possibly go on for. max verstappen knowing dan and daph, at least 5 years or more. lewis hamilton seems reasonable.

daphne jones ooh, i’m getting called a slut already

daniel ricciardo sweetheart no. daphne jones nothing i'm not used to already 🤷🏼‍♀️ carlos sainz i can defend your honor mae jones i can bite ankles. i am not above it. max verstappen we’re aware sebastian vettel you’re all children

max verstappen added one person

max verstappen don't make me fucking regret this gasly

max verstappen he was being a nuisance i had to add him mae jones that's a big word for elmo max verstappen fuck you jones mae jones woah, max, we broke up, you can't do that anymore max verstappen fuck off jones, that works better

lewis hamilton you have to swear to secrecy. what is said in the groupchat stays in the groupchat.

pierre gasly i solemnly swear max verstappen i swear if you add fucking leclerc i'm going to crash into you at turn one whenever you start racing in f1 pierre gasly i still don't understand why you hate him but okay mae jones he still bitter about the inchident max verstappen honestly mae, stop bullying me. mae jones but you make it so easy

carlos sainz daphne and daniel are dating and you can't tell anyone, not even this charles max is talking about.

pierre gasly daniel ricciardo dating music legend daphne jones? that seems like tas de merde

mae jones THEY DON'T TEACH FRENCH IN JAIL YOU FUCKING BAGUETTE!!! lewis hamilton you've been to jail? mae jones once in monopoly...it was not fun daniel ricciardo i nearly lost my couch the last time we played carlos sainz I ALMOST LOST AN EYE!

pierre gasly HOW THE HELL DID LEWIS AND SEBASTIAN END UP IN THIS BEFORE ME?

max verstappen fernando is here too, he just never answers pierre gasly I'VE KNOWN YOU MOST OF OUR LIVES AND THIS IS THE TREATMENT I GET? daniel ricciardo seb is the reason daphne and i are together. lewis is nursing a broken heart. rip nico and lewis' friendship, you will be missed and you were iconic. as for nando, well you try telling no to a 2x world champion that ended michael schumacher's streak mae jones fernando alonso is a legend put some respect on his name

carlos sainz he has to prove he's willing to defend daphne

pierre gasly fuck kanye daniel ricciardo that's the spirit daphne jones no. stop. don't encourage this daniel. max verstappen no let him. he deserves it.

fernando alonso will you people shut up? it's 3am, go to sleep.

sebastian vettel you're old, that's why you're boring. fernando alonso and yet neither of us has won a world championship with ferrari. sebastian vettel i still have time i don't plan on leaving anytime soon, unlike you, quitter. fernando alonso just don't pull another multi 21 with kimi and things will be fine

mae jones uncle lewis, our dads are fighting again!

lewis hamilton they'll get over it in a few hours. they always do.

fernando alonso changed the group name to multi 21 seb

fernando alonso changed the group photo

daniel ricciardo yeah this isn't going away any time soon

max verstappen where did he even find a picture for this? last time it was just a picture of nando's car

daphne jones not this again.

pierre gasly this happens often?

mae jones too often. at least once every two weeks.

AUGUST 23RD, 2017

liked by maejones, pierregasly, maxverstappen33 and others

danielricciardo something about how the world moves on another drama but not for me.

view all comments

user92 mr.ricciardo, what does that caption mean?

maejones i see you did your research

danielricciardo i have it written down and underlined in red.

user61 coincidence that this is posted the same day daphne jones announces her new album? i think not

user31 song lyrics? danielriccciardo okay, sherlock and watson, calm down. you expect daphne 'expert secret keeper' jones, to tell me daniel 'blabbermouth' ricciardo her song lyrics? user89 he's got a good point. if anything she'd tell mae, her sister, and not one of her friends.

maxverstappen33 why that picture out of all of them? you have so many and you chose that one?

danielricciardo i think i look fucking great

¡leclerc-s speaks! we will not be speaking of today's grand prix. i live in delusion, charles is still, sadly, p6 and lewis is p2. i will take no arguments on this. enjoy this short chapter.

¡disclaimer! this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[autolenaphilia]

Fuck Chromium (and that includes Brave and Vivialdi)

I have made multiple posts about why you should use Firefox, and of course I get the reply "not all chromium browsers are bad, they are not all as evil as Chrome." And sure, browsers who use the chromium code are not required to do all the shady things that Google does with it.

Still, I think it's bad that chromium-based browsers are getting close to total market dominance. By this point it has made Google's competitors like Microsoft and Opera drop their own unique proprietary browser engines for chromium. Browsers are becoming a fucking monoculture at this point. And Chromium becoming the browser code base of choice empowers Google, since they are the ones who mainly develop, maintain and fund its code. It means supporting them in their quest to become an internet monopoly that can do things like drm the web itself.

So let me be clear: you are still supporting google by using chromium-based browsers. By helping out in making chromium the de facto standard for browsers, you are giving google power. They are the ones driving chromium development, they will set the standards. And those standards will be in Google's favor. They are an ad company, their goal is to kill off adblockers by making them impossible to use, first with manifest v3 for extensions and now WEI, their web drm.

Brave is a joke.

The supposed "good guy" chromium browsers people recommend are actually shady as shit.

The one i see recommended the most is Brave, and it's fucking terrible. For one thing, it is funded by right-wing techbro Brendan Eich. He was Mozilla CEO for some time, but then people found he was a massive homophobe who funded campaigns against marriage equality, and Mozilla forced him to resign. And that's why he created Brave. That's who you are supporting by using Brave.

It runs off chromium because that's the easy and lazy choice for a browser. And it's literally funded through cryptocurrency, probably the negative environmental impact is a plus in Eich's book. And its adblocker runs off the same dishonest business model as adblock plus does, it will not block ads if advertisers pay them for the privilege. This betrayal of the users is opt-in at least, and you get paid for watching ads, but it's in the aforementioned worthless crypto beans. Brave is a joke.

Vivaldi and the importance of open-source

And then there's Vivaldi, it's a freeware proprietary browser run by a for-profit company, which alone should scare you off it.

"If you aren't paying for it, you are not the customer, you are the product" is a phrase that sometimes unfairly gets applied to open source projects to dismiss them. If it's open source and either community-run or run by a non-profit foundation like the Open document foundation for Libreoffice and or the Mozilla foundation for Firefox/Thunderbird, you are safe even if it's free.

But that phrase 100% applies to free products from for-profit corporations. These companies need to make profits at some point for for their shareholders, and if it is not from selling goods or services, it comes from things like selling your user's data or "attention".

That applies to Vivaldi, who makes big promises about how they will respect their users privacy and never sell their data. But promises mean nothing, Google also says they respect your privacy. And the thing is, Vivaldi is closed source. Not entirely, ironically the bits they got from Google's chromium are open source, but other parts of their code is closed-source. And what that means is, they can make any and all promises about what their browser's code does and there is nobody except Vivaldi that can check if their code actually fulfils those promises. Only Vivaldi has access to that code.

I'm no open-source fanatic, like I don't care if some random game i install and play is closed-source, as long as it is from a credible developer. But open-source is important for security and privacy, because that means someone else other than the company who develops the program can vet it's code for vulnerabilities and privacy violations. Your browser and e-mail client (vivaldi has an e-mail client too) should be open-source for your own safety, because those programs handle sensitive data like your passwords or your e-mails. Closed-source is not more secure, since Kerckhoff's principle applies to digital security and privacy.

And Vivaldi by being proprietary software fails that test. Their own justification is that being closed-source is "their first line of defense, to prevent other parties from taking the code and building an equivalent browser (essentially a fork) too easily." It's the same hypocritical argument that Red Hat used to justify making their Enterprise Linux distro closed-source. "It's fine if we use chromium's code to build our own browser, and expressly for making an Opera clone (that's the literal point of Vivaldi, that's why the name is a music reference), but if someone does the same with our product, they're evil." It's nauseating and alone justification to distrust Vivaldi as it is crying out to be trusted.

Listen to some Antonio Vivaldi instead, his music slaps. And install Firefox and Thunderbird instead.

[florsial]

Slytherin Skittles (aka Hogwarts' Pantheon) Incorrect quotes!

(+others)

. . . . .

Evan: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what Barty will and will not eat. Pandora: Grass? Yes! Evan: Moss? Yes!! Pandora: Leaves? Ohh, yes! Evan: Shoelaces? Strange but true! Pandora: Worms? Sometimes! Evan: Rocks? Usually nah. Pandora: Twigs? Usually! Evan: Dorcas's cooking? Inconclusive! Regulus: How did you… test this? Evan: You just hand them stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if they eat it, they eat it. Regulus: ... I don’t know how to feel about this. Dorcas: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT?

. . . .

Regulus: Where's Evan, Dorcas, and Pandora?

Barty: They're playing hide and seek. Regulus: Where? Barty: I don't think you get how this game works.

. . . .

Pandora: Regulus's first detention, I'm so proud. Evan: Whoa, back up. Why did they get detention? Dorcas: Because they're an idiot. Barty, terrified: They can do that??

. . . .

Regulus: I swear to god I'm the only one here with a braincell. Evan and Barty: ALL HAIL the keeper of the sacred braincell!

. . . .

Regulus: What did you guys get in your yearbook? Dorcas: 'Prettiest Smile' Pandora: 'Nicest Personality' Barty: 'Most likely to start a bar fight' Evan: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one'

. . . .

Regulus: You're a lying piece of shit! Barty: Oh yeah? You're the idiot that thinks you can get away with everything you do, WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD! Evan: I'm leaving and I'm taking Pandora with me! Dorcas, gathering cards: Aaaaand that's enough Monopoly for today.

. . . .

Pandora: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me? Dorcas: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it. Barty: Three of us saw it, Dorcas. How do you explain that? Dorcas: *points at Evan* Sleep deprivation. *points at Regulus* Paranoia. *points at Barty* Delusional personality disorder.

. . . .

Pandora: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast? Dorcas: Several traffic violations. Evan: Three counts of resisting arrest. Barty: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks. Regulus: Also, that’s not our car.

. . . .

Barty: How do you connect with a fictional character? Evan: What? Dorcas: What? Pandora: What? Regulus: *pulls up a 500 slide presentation* I'm glad you asked.

. . . .

Regulus: Ah, yes. Here we have a beautiful couple... Pandora: I really care about your feelings! Lily: I really care about YOUR feelings! Regulus, turning their head: ...and then there's the disaster couple... Barty: YOU NEED TO PAY MORE ATTENTION TO ME INSTEAD OF BEING AT THE HOSPITAL! Evan: I WOULDN'T HAVE TO SPEND SO MUCH TIME AT THE HOSPITAL IF YOU STOPPED INSISTING ON FIGHTING EVERYONE WHO COMES WITHIN A FIVE FOOT RADIUS OF YOU!

. . . .

James: What did you get Regulus for their birthday? Pandora: I got them a kitten. Barty: Really? Me too! Dorcas: I also got them a cat. Evan: Looks like we had the same idea. Pandora: James, please tell me you didn't get Regulus a cat as well! James: ...I got them a kitten. *later* Regulus, in their apartment surrounded by cats and kittens: This is the best birthday ever!

. . . .

Pandora: What do rainbows mean to you? Barty: Gay rights. Dorcas: There's money. Evan: The sign of God's promise to never destroy the whole Earth with a flood. Regulus: It is an optical phenomenon that separates sunlight into its continuous spectrum when the sun shines on raindrops.

. . . .

Regulus: Poison is a magic transmutation potion that turns people into corpses. Barty: This knife is actually a magic wand. Evan: Meet me in the Denny's parking lot for a wizard duel. Pandora: * cocks gun* Magic missile. Dorcas: What the fuck is wrong with you people.

[lxcalmenace]

Good day, dear Kay! ^*^

Can I request some cute headcanons about being a blue lock fem!manager or assistant? Something like cute interactions, how manager cares of boys and they are simps/whipped or just have a soft spot for their cute manager. Please, ignore it, if it's uncomfortable for you!

Have a nice day~

The boys sure were surprised when Ego suddenly announced the news. Apparently the Bluelock boys were getting a new manager. Some were excited, some were angry but no one dared to oppose Ego. So here were they, with their new manager y/n l/n after a week they joined in.

How bluelock boys act with their new manager

F.t. The Bluelock boys

Gn! Y/n

Tw: Swearing

The art doesn't belong to me. Credits to the respective owner.

---------------------------------------------------☆

Headcanons!

•Day 1 and it's hella akward. Isagi and Chigiri will try to ease the tension and befriend you. They realised that it's probably not that bad as they thought at first.

•Soon enough, everyone gets comfortable with you; well almost everyone except RinRin and Barou

•After spending a whole week with them you finally realise the reason Ego sent you as their manager. It was a whole chaos but somehow you still managed it.

•Nagi is like a parasite, always attached to you. Mainly because he gets to be lazy around you. "Y/nnn, you're the only one who is not a hassle. Please stay here forever"

"You're only saying this because I cleaned your room"

•On the other hand, Reo scolds you for babying Nagi (says who 🙄). But Reo will also teach you some of his football tricks in his free time.

•The worry about Shidou and Rin constantly being at each other's throats never leaves you alone.

"FUCK YOU STUPID BUMBLING ANTENNAE! " "OH FUCK ME YOURSELF YOU COWARD! "

*Aggressively throwing hands*

•Yeah, pretty much like that. You practically have to step in between their argument or else someone's definitely going to the hospital tonight.

•Although uou never believed Shidou being a 'Demon' because he always acts like an angel around you. Keeping you company when you're doing some boring paperwork and occasionally asking for your number.

•Same goes for Barou. He might look all scary and mean but inside, he's just a soft guy who likes cleaning with you. He'll often help you with cleaning the mess created by the other players.

•Whenever you're not doing your work, you're always seen with Otoya and Karasu. Whether it being pulling off small, harmless pranks or just having a chat in the lunch room. Karasu always bonks Otoya in the head for flirting with you. Oh god, he's such a simp for you.

•Saturdays for you are 'Self-care Saturdays'. Aryu along with Chigiri will both help you with your hair. Sharing their secrets and tips to self care. Oh boy, you sure are leaving Bluelock looking like a model.

•Isagi and Bachira never let the boredom get to you. Monopoly, snake and ladder, uno, whatever you want, they are always ready to play with you. The duo itself is so entertaining that you don't even need anything else.

•Ok but Rin Itoshi's usually 'so cold' and 'merciless' eyes always soften when you are with him. He hates to admit it but he has finally started to let down his tough walls around you. You being the only one whose presence is somewhat tolerable to him. You're often seen helping him with his workout.

•Yukimiya let's you wear his glasses PERIOD

•You definitely have regular sleepovers with Nanase and Hiori, with Niko sometimes joining you. Those 3 pure balls of sunshine never fail to make your day brighter.

•You still wonder, what would've happened if you had declined Ego's proposal. You would've never met such unique people. But you know one thing for sure, you will always stay in touch with the boys, no matter what path you or they choose in the future.

----------------------------------------------------------

I tried to include every character in this. I sincerely apologize but I couldn't think anymore. I'm not a manga reader, I'm sorry (　；∀；)

Soo how does it feel to be the Bluelock's favorite manager? I have decided that I'll start requests for Chainsaw man and Jujutsu Kaisen too. So currently, I'm open to write for 3 fandoms: Bluelock, Chainsaw man and Jujutsu Kaisen

Soo, let the requests roll in!

[grigori77]

Critical Role, Campaign 3 Episode 105

Dirty ass voice actors! Yes indeed! XD

Nord VPN? Oh gods help us ... what the sweet fuck is THIS shit? Wow ... Liam, that is DISTURBING ... is that a Ferris Bueller reference, Sam? That was yet more weird shit from the most cringe of all the sponsors, definitely ... and yeah, I'm with you, Liam. That WAS unsettling ...

Marisha: "This is unhinged." Matt: "Now? Only now? To be honest I kicked it all off with dirty ass voice actors ..."

Oh yeah ... spin the bottle ... yeah ...

So ... yeah ... the cliffhanger ... so IS THIS really Liliana or not? Because we were DEEPLY suspicious ... something feels OFF ... The Shrine of Gilded Gifts? Hmmm ... DO WE believe this? Do we TRUST IT? I don't know. I don't LIKE IT, certainly ...

Wait ... the Weave Mind ARE here? "Terraforming"? Hmmmm ... I mean it makes sense, but ...

A memory? OH!!! Oh shit ... oh yeah, that makes a twisted kind of sense ... and yeah, SHE IS ridiculously OP'd ...

Okay, so if this IS real ... wow, this is SERIOUS, then ... of course SHE WOULD totally make a stand, definitely. It's for her little girl, she's definitely made it clear Imogen means more to her than anything else ...

History check? First roll of the evening ... Nat19 for a 23? ASHLEY JOHNSON ... very nice ...

The Pravienier ... interesting ... and NO, Chetney, that is NOT real Elvish ... XD ...

So, is it a trap or for real?

CAN THEY check in with Ira? I thought the connection was still TRICKY between here and Ruidus ...

"A hot spider"? Oh boy ... I mean yeah, Laudna definitely WOULD agree with that description of Ira, but still ... XD

Good point ... WHICH leyline nexus?

Recruit potential allies in the Seelie? Yeah, that has potential too ...

Whoa! There ARE Judicators here? Crazy ... that is ... a little disconcerting ... O.O

I love how Orym-wise 24 is considered LOW in Perception terms ... LOL

Okay, so ... a bit of pre-game prep, then ... hmmmm ... what to do? Yes ... work out what NOT TO SAY, definitely ... "the back door and your mom" ... yeah ...

Telepathic Bond? Smart move, Imogen ...

Taliesin: "What symbol is that?" Liam: "That's a pie." Taliesin: "Oh, that's a WHOLE pie. Now I'm hungry."

They have Monopoly in Exandria?

Is Fearne leaving her options open? That's interesting ... is it just because Braius is very large and hot? (I mean that DOES go a long way ...) Meanwhile Ashton is cracking up and I love it ... I think he's as curious as the rest of us on this, but then that's just the chaos gremlin in him ... XD "The little warrior"? Oh boy ... I mean HE IS hot too ...

Wow ... yeah, I agree ... IS THAT a redirect for Braius onto ASHTON? That should be interesting too ...

All the shippers are going INSANE right now ... LOL

Oh dear ... who was THAT sneaky individual? Could that be a problem? Apparently he looked a bit like Dorian ...

OH SHIT!!! Is it Dorian's DAD?!!!

Super fancy platinum golems? Fascinating ... OH!!! The silver dragon! Wow ... that is IMPRESSIVE ...

A tiny bit of pee comes out of Dorian when he casts See Invisibility ... O.O

Carkonos? Of the Fire Ashari! Aweome!

Athudashionus? Oh, the DRAGON?!!! Awesome name ... the whole room is Zone of Truthed? Cool ...

20 is the save to beat that shit? Crazy ... but Dorian Nat20s that shit, so ...

Thankfully, that was not Bolo ... XD

VOX MACHINA are going for the Malleus Key? Sweet! That's a potentially awesome one-shot I wouldn't mind seeing them play sometime ...

And the Mighty Nein are going after the Weave Mind ... sweet! That would ALSO be cool ... oh yeah, the Bright Queen would DEFINITELY be fully in support of THEM ... XD

Bells Hells for the final mission ... because nobody has a CLUE who THIS LOT are ... and now EVERYBODY is looking right at them ... oh boy ... O.O ... eep ...

Orym: "Time is short!" Ashton: "And so am I ... sorry, just couldn't hold it in!" Orym: "Careful, there's a lot of halflings in this room."

Oh yeah, Ashtong definitely ISN'T going to be finding it easy to hold his tongue right now in the face of THIS ... nice one, Dorian ...

Wow ... is Braius SERIOUSLY going to bluff and say he's a cleric of the Platinum Dragon? O.O ... oh fuck this is BOLD and seriously ballsy ... "and we have a guy who makes chairs" LOL ... ah yes, Seedling IS now a Vestige, after all ...

Gift of Gab? Oh dear ... that could have been so cool ... crap ... way to fumble the pass, Braius ...

Religion check ... well, I mean HE DID once serve the Platinum Dragon, so he COULD name a Saint ... come on Riegel ... The Fallen Saint? Saint Graham? Oh yes ... I mean that one DOES seem to fit with Braius' backstory ... and this boy clearly knows NO FUCKING SHAME AT ALL ...

A Deception check? Really? HOLY FUCK this is risky ... yeah, that really does sound like a HUGE FUCKING EPIC FAIL to me ... O.O ... yeah, good luck reading THAT mind, Imogen ... yeah, that sounds ... WORRYING ... hmmmmm ...

Oh, this douche is going after Laudna? SERIOUSLY?!!! You better fucking not ... but our girl is NOT one to just wither in response ... Persuasion check? Okay ... NAT20!!! IN YOUR FACE you stuck-up ASSHAT ...

Wow ... and then THE MATRON HERSELF comes to back her up? Oh that is SWEET ...

The Titans' powers? Oh boy ... Ashton KEEP YOUR FUCKING COOL right now ... oh shit ... all right then ... this might as well just fucking happen then ...

Yeah no, that was actually pretty good, actually ... Persuasion check, but using his STRENGTH modifier because it's Strength of Character ... okay then ... andc now Fearne's stepping up to back him up too ... even more okay than ... hmmmm ... O.O

And now they're just gonna do what they do, then ... Ashton is now Raging, and it's the Time-Bending thing ... oh boy ... and now he's HULKING OUT ... fuck, this is a WHOLE MESS OF CRAZY SHIT all unfolding at once right now ... wow ...

Meanwhile Fearne Flames On and does her thing too ... which is just all kinds of fucking HOT, of course ...

Now they're BOTH making Persuasion checks ... but VERY MUCH with advantage, then ... oof ... Ashley just COMPLETELY fucked THAT roll ... but at least Tal managed to hold up HIS end ...

So ... did that work? It's unclear ... ummmmm ... O.O

Fuck ... come on, Dorian ... get it together ... you're COOL ... and you're like VERY MUCH the heart of this crew ... YES!!! Use your words! Bard it up!

Oh, is he gonna GENUINELY Bard it up right now? YES!!! Do that! Express yourself THROUGH SONG!!! Oh ... oh, yeah, that's pretty impressive too ... that's really cool ... Coriolus? The great Equine Dragon? Sweet!

Liam: "Orym totally blue-screens." I fucking BET HE DOES ...

And now it's Chetney's turn ... oh boy ... well, he DOES have a long memory, I'll give him that ... maybe you should just WOLF OUT ... "tiny sexy breath" ... dear gods ... yeah, that's right. That's right, he DOES wolf out ... perfect ...

All that and Travis rolls a 12 on his Persuasion check ... oof ... Laura: "But it was so good!"

Come on Kiki ... bring it home for them all ...

Whoa ... a whole bunch of big fancy titles ... and yeah, OF COURSE the Saviour Blade makes his mistress DAMN FUCKING PROUD ...

Does anybody challenge? Oh fuck ... this could still go SO BAD ... O.O

Whoa ... so they actually PULLED THAT OFF?!!! Thank fuck for that ... I'm fucking DEAD y'all ...

Oh that musical cue was VERY WELL TIMED, Matthew Mercer ...

Fuck ... is Chetney a father? Is THAT what the fuck is happening right now? Bloody hell ... XD

And here comes Dorian's daddy, just as we expected ... AND NOW Mercer chooses to call it a break? YOU MONSTER!!!

"Bronte" ... oh yeah, I had all but forgotten Dorian's real name ... I still MUCH prefer Dorian Storm, though ...

Oh, I really don't like the way he said "it is your nature" ... that sounded all kinds of judgy and disapproving in THE WORST of ways ...

Fuck ... this just got unexpectedly emotional ... and doeshe even KNOW about their loss yet? I wonder how Dorian's even going to BROACH that subject ...

Shit ... he just dropped it ... he got angry and he DROPPED that bombshell ... meanwhile I can already see EXACTLY what his father's REALLY thinking, what he's gonna say ... yeah, I guess THAT ONE right on the nose ...

Honestly, I don't think Dorian REALLY needs to make an Insight check even if the Zone of Truth IS still up ... that sounded very honest to me and he IS a parent and he is going to play it AS SAFE AS HE POSSIBLY CAN ...

The sword? Holy shit ... his father's most holy ceremonial blade ... that is RIDICULOUSLY generous ... Gambolcleft the Vortex Blade? Holy shit ... sexy sexy scimitar ... very nice ...

Dorian (giving up the Gambler's Blade in return): "Here, a drunk old man who died while pissing gave this to me."

The acceptance Dorian's been chasing his whole life? Wow ... that was awkward and I was NOT fully convinced he was REALLY entirely selfless there, but still ... it was BLOODY EMOTIONAL too ...

Meanwhile with Chetney's Maybe Baby ... oh, so he's JUST A FAN ... Matt Mercver you FUCKING GIT ... that was SO MEAN ... I love that ... XD

Scalebearer Waylon ... hmmmm ... he's adorable, I swear ...

"THE C-POPPERS"?!!! Holy shit ... Chetney has a bona fide FANDOM ... I am DYING AGAIN I swear ... LOL

Oh wow Imogen ... poor sweet Imogen just got COMPLETELY BLANKED ... oof ...

Highbearer Vord comes to speak with Braius ... oh, this could be fucking awkward ... O.O

The Platinum House in Zadash ... ah crap ... here we go ... WHOA, he still has his old PD symbol? That's kinda heartbreaking ...

PIKE has come to his defence? Oh my sweet Lil' Monstah! We love you SO MUCH you darling wee lass! That's my girl! :3

Essentially he's just getting A PASS. That'll probably have to do ... wait ... is he getting an ACTUAL ARMOUR UPGRADE?!!! Holy fuck ... O.O ... bloody hell, this is some LEGACY SHIT right now ... Truthbearer? SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT ... O.O

Taliesin "He made the gift of a holy relic like an epic burn." Yeah, the Highbearer is kind of being a bit of a troll right now even in his grace and I love it ...

Shit ... that's a LONG PAPER too ...

Laudna wants to go with Chetney to see his fanboy's impressive collection of C-Pop Industries works ... wow ... this is gonna be a fucking TRIP ...

"How much Orym LOVES Dorian" ... Liam O'Brian out here feeding us more crumbs right now ... the slowburn game is FIERCE right now, damn it ... AND the wee man is swooning over the silver fox, too ... XD

Awwwww ... Ashton and Dorian are so sweet ... Ashton: "Stay soft. We need it. We lost ours." :3

Keyleth is being really kind to Imogen too ... and now she's letting HER know the truth about her mother in return ... yeah ... I mean if ANYONE can be understanding about THAT it's the Voice ... and now Imogen's just UNLOADING EVERYTHING to her ... wow ...

Keyleth: "Do you trust her?" OH BOY ...

Oh shit ... so Keyleth HASN'T talked to the other members of Vox Machina about this shit yet? FUCK ... that's ... BOLD ...

Still in full-blown FIRE GOD FORM, Fearne is now passed out in a chair ... O.O

I love how they were expecting another Keyfish there ... LOL ... that PERFECTLY derailed the moment, guys ...

So we have A WEEK to make arrangements ... okay ... so what to do, then?

Matt makes Laura do a random D20 roll ... what's THAT FOR, Mercer? I don't trust you at all ...

Yes. Ira for the Fey Realm shit. And Nana Mori. Very smart ...

Liam! Stop looking at other characters on your iPad right now!

Chetney, what are you doing? Nat19 on a Persuasion check? Nice ... he is a SNARKY LITTLE SHIT, this guard ... but that SEEMS to have worked ... an audience with the Bright Queen, then. DO NOT lose your head, Chet, I know she's a hottie ...

Oh, she is a TRICKY one. I love that ... XD ... Marisha: "Are you gonna fuck the Bright Queen?" Travis (as Chetney): "Who says I haven't already?" Matt: "She does."

Aha ... so she might still be willing to help ASHTON in this, at least ... okay ... oh, so ... is she trying to get Chetney to BETRAY Ashton instead? Fuck ... O.O

Liam: "That woman could dropkick you through time." Travis: "I'm well aware of that."

Full-on GOD MODE kiss between the two titans ... and Ashton takes SEVEN POINTS of Fire damage ... XD

Now ASHTON'S going to talk to the Bright Queen ... this will be interesting ...

"The smallest bead of light" ... ooooh, okay ... and it sounds like Ashton could actually PUNCH A WHOLE IN REALITY if he really tried ... wow ...

Chetney: "Is my calendar clear?" Ashton: "Is you collander what?"

Going after Waylon, then ... meanwhile Fearne is trying to establish if this is, in fact, A RUSE ... OH!!! WHISPERS!!! Nice ... I wonder where THAT'S going ...

This tiny wee man is TOO CUTE ... he's like A TOTAL NERD ... and now he's geeking out over the toys Chet made for the others ... a "macabre twist"? Oh my gods ... LOL

The "Chateau de C-Pop" ... oh boy ...

Holy fuck it's REAL. This kid is a MEGAFAN ... this is levels of nerd reserved for the genuine obssessive LUNATICS among fandom ... I would not be surprised if this guy has his own late mother stuffed in a rocking chair down in the cellar ... likely a rocking chair created by Chet himself ...

The safe ... of the safe ... that's the best of all ... and the egg ... sweet fuck what is THIS mad shit? O.O Oh my fucking GODS that is pretty fricking AWESOME actually ... Chetney you are a fucking GENIUS ...

THERE IS ANOTHER ... oh my fucking gods ... LOL

"An apprentice?" Waylon FAINTS. Of course he does ...

I'm sorry ... HOW MUCH?!!! O.O

Are there any fakes? Oh wow ... I am INTRIGUED ... where the fuck is this going? A perception check? Oh boy ...

Drixlitch ... GRRRRRRRRRRRR ...

Fuck ... Chetney MADE FUCKING BEDS ... this is getting truly BIZARRE ...

Chetney: "I create ... because I am." AGAIN. I'M FUCKING DYING. XD

POP-CON?!!! Dear fucking gods ...

Wow ... Braius just made it truly surreal ... I am now truly DEAD again ...

D&Dbay? Fuck ... XD

Matt: "And ... THAT is where we're gonna call it a night." Fuck ... that is just TOO MUCH for one night ...

Travis: "If we stay here ... what if I die in my sleep?"

[nectardaddy]

im back for round two bc we're not going feral enough

look and lets play a game!

ask game !

(I was thinking the same thing, I'll hyu with a another one too! also I'm yapping strap in)

look!: do you have any common interests? Or has any of you got or tried to get the other on one of your favorite tv shows/books? Was it successful? Are they now the ones 'annoying' you to watch it with them?

Once again, we are avid readers (molly you already know what I read sigh) but omi has tried to get me to like those dark horror books (think paranormal/almost "who done it" type of dark). But I need instant gratification so I can't sit there and read a 600 page book about that and NOT know what's happening and who did it.

But I have gotten him into trashy tv like fucking love island (I am OBSESSED). He says he's not into it, but he def is, to the point he's reacting with me like "what????? did she really do that???" Also got him into yellowstone that he calls "the cowboy show"

let's play a little game: do you like to play video games together? Or does one like to watch the other as they play? If the game is for only one player, do you like to take turns (maybe one of you is better/less scared/etc at a section of the game/a boss). What about board games? What do you like to play? Cards, uno, monopoly, dominoes? Who wins everytime? Are any of you competitive?

mario kart is banned in the house bc of how we act.... also spoons is banned from any function if we are going there because I will actually hurt people don't play with me....

He likes to make people think he's not competitive and act like he doesn't care but he most def is! If it's just us we are deadass going for blood. I am not a good sport, I play dirty and I don't care. "you're CHEATING wtf!" "you just suck ASS skill issue"

He doesn't play a lot of video games though unlike me. He usually just sits with me while I do. "look babe I made us a house in minecraft!" "that's so cute you fucking nerd"

[shytastemakerthing]

Heyy! Since I saw you do OC matchup, I'd like to request one with Twisted Wonderland for romantic!

So here's how I would describe my OC:

Name : Kogane

Age : 15/16 (first year at NRC)

Race/species : Human, fox/cat eyes pupils

Gender : Female

Moral alignement : Chaotic good(evil sometimes?)

Class : 1-A (with grim, ace and deuce)

Appearance : mid-long brown hair, golden eyes, 5'6 (167cm)

MBTI : ISTJ

☆Body☆

Strenght : 2,5/5

Dexterity : 3,5/5

Health : 3,5/5

Energy : 2,5/5

Beauty : 4/5

Style : 4/5

Hygiene : 4/5

☆Mind☆

Intelligence : 4/5

Happiness : 2/5

Confidence : 2/5

Humor : 5/5

Anxious : 5/5

Patience : 3/5

Playfulness : 5/5

Smug : 5/5

Sarcastic : 5/5

☆Behavior☆

With children : caring, sweet

With strangers : rude, harsh

With loved one : sweet, teasing, kind, playful, sarcastic in a joking way

With hated one : rude, mean and sarcastic in a harsh way

With animals : find them adorable but affraid of touch and pet them (except grim)

☆Likes☆

Video games, board games (cards, monopoly), challenges/deals, hugs, sleeping, cats, playing violin, dancing, singing and pastries

☆Dislikes☆

Bugs, reading, sports, too much sugar, flying (affraid of the height so she refuses kalim's invitation to fly on his magic carpet all the time)

☆More informations☆

Kogane is a OC i created based on how i would've "survived" at NRC, but i gave her more smug, sarcastic and evil personality than i am

So if she has to be in a dorm except ramschackle, she'd be in octavinelle, she get along well with azul and the tweels

But also get along well with everyone from every dorms (except : Rook (weirdo) and Sebek (too loud like stfu))

"It's fucked up" she thinks sometime... Because she HAS to return to her world, but they can't get too attached, or else it'll hurt them all

She really wants to return to her world because her father is (now) alone to take care of their family shop (her mom died at age of 7 from pneunomia, they were poor and couldn't save her)

And she also want to "repay" her dad for everythings he did for her

But she also wants to stay

Complicated, isn't it?

So i want someone to comfort her and make her forgets all of her problems by enjoying life with them

I also created some quotes with her and twst boys, here's some :

*Kalim having an indigestion because of Kogane.*

Kogane: I can explain.

Jamil: Can you?

Kogane: If you give me thirty seconds to think of a lie.

—————————————————————————

Kogane, during Mascarade event, trying to cheer the group up: Things could be worse, you know!

Idia: How?

Kogane: How what?

Idia: How could they be worse?

Kogane: They couldn’t, I lied.

Idia: ☠️

—————————————————————————

Kogane: Fuck.

Vil: We've got to work on your cursing.

Kogane: Why? I'm pretty good at cursing already.

—————————————————————————

Thanks for reading! Sorry if i misspelled something and sorry for the looonng text!

Do ignore if you don't want to write, and take care of you! =]

Hello and thank you so much for this request and your patience, it is greatly appreciated! I do hope that you enjoy your match-up! Have a wonderful day/night!

Request: Twisted Wonderland Match-up

I match you with........

Leona Kingscholar

Cats and sleep. Need I say more?

With just one rather handsome lion man, she will have the best of both worlds. Leona is a lion beast-man, essentially a giant murder cat, and he spends much of his time asleep. It's a winning scenario

He already drinks respect women juice on the daily, and that goes into how he treats Kogane. Now, not exactly like a dainty princess, oh no. He knows for certain that Kogane can hold her own, but it is clear that she has his respect and support when needed

Chances are, she has become a pillow for him, not that she would mind. Sleeping cat in her lap, and said sleeping cat is a very handsome man

Ultimate win

More often than not, they will both sleep in his room more often. Nice and cozy in bed

He absolutely loves the sarcasm that ripples off of this woman, someone who can match up with him like that?

Yeah, he's in love

If she is with Leona, chances are she has met Cheka

Meaning he also gets left with her seeing how Kogane is with children...again, no complaints, he's a cute little furball

When it comes to comfort, Leona certainly is not the best with words, but he always believed that actions spoke much louder

He knows that this must all be unfamiliar to her, a whole new world with possibly no chance to get back to her own, a new culture, society, teachings, and so many other things, he couldn't fully fathom what she was going through

What he fails with words, his actions help, and they help a lot

Silent retreats to his room, holding onto her in bed, her head pressed against his chest, running his fingers through her hair and a long her back, anything to let her know that he is there and he always will be for as long as she would let him

And if that day ever came that she would have the chance to return to her world, and if she took that chance, he wouldn't hold her back, what she would want would matter more than what he would want, always

Thank you for your request!

[idontwanttospoiltheparty]

why are the conspiracy theorists all on your blog lmaooo. anyways, i wanted to ask you if you have been writing fanfiction/original work lately. no pressure though.

Girl I WISH I knew………….

I actually started writing again pretty soon after my last upload!

(I posted a new fic a few weeks ago, you probably saw that though lol, but it is kinda still my baby, so I don't mind plugging it again. Like… I feel like so many of my feelings on Beatles history and John and Paul's relationship specifically are weaved into its very fabric)

Anyways, I've actually started working on two sort of "expanded universe" stories set in the world of the last fic. I'm not 100% sure if they'll actually get finished, though, it's a bit low commitment right now.

I'm also working on my beloved "John and Stu both live (and are now a couple) and they are spending the day with Paul after Linda dies" story. It's a mostly plot-light one-shot. They play Monopoly lol.

Here's a preview of what I got that I think captures the vibe well:

Neither of them were particularly quick when it came to taking off their shoes; John had to mind his back these days (Paul looked away, not wanting to think about frailty too much); meanwhile, Stu’s motions had always been relaxed and graceful. Even as a kid, Paul had found it irritating to watch the lad over-carefully unfolding his sunglasses and slipping them on.

“Tea?” Paul offered, jiggling his leg.

Both men turned their heads up towards him.

“Yeah, give me a sec,” John said, before slowly rising to his feet with a quiet, pained groan. “Let me take care of it.”

Linda would have put on the kettle by now already. Paul swallowed.

“No.”

John frowned, glancing over at Stu, who had felt the need to place his shoes on the rack instead of just leaving them on the floor. “Why not?”

Because I don’t want to feel like you came here to pity me.

“I’m the host. Would be rude.” And with that, Paul turned around and marched into the kitchen.

He felt a hand reach for his arm. “C’mon, Paul. Don’t get stubborn now.”

Paul tensed his shoulders, not turning around as he made his way to the stove – Linda’s stove. “It’s not bein’ stubborn – just manners.” His hand was now resting on the knob, for some reason refraining from turning on the gas.

“Paul…” John had gentled his tone in a way that emphasized the creakiness in his voice that Paul had recently begun noticing and it made his skin crawl.

Determined not to look at his mate, Paul stared straight ahead, his eyes once again stinging with tears.

“Oh, for Christ’s sake…” Stu, who’d apparently followed them into the kitchen, grabbed the kettle from the counter, filled it at the sink, placed it on a burner on the other side of the stove, and then finally flicked on the gas. 

Paul shot him a death glare.

What the fuck do you think you’re doin’? he wanted to shout – Stu was John’s plus-one, after all, not a real guest – but before he could get the words out, Paul was promptly seized by an overwhelming sense of déjà-vu:

The three of them in his kitchen (though not this kitchen), and Stu making himself all too comfortable in a way that for some reason drove Paul up the wall; “You’re here to practice, not rummage through me cupboards, Stu,” even though John had been doing just the same.

No, not déjà-vu, Paul realized, staring down at the blue flame under the kettle. That really happened – decades prior, in Liverpool, when they had all still been boys, slicking their hair back and passing around stale cigarettes just to save on cash.

All at once delighted by the image, Paul threw his head back laughing.

[bellysoupset]

ooh for jonah as a caretaker, could you write him taking care of a very feverish leo, but in front of the team, and they all get to see his soft and fuzzy side for once? he tries to hide it but leo really is very sick and being very adorable, and keeping a straight face is hard when your giant bf is stuck to you like a koala

"Don't you have anything normal to eat?" Vince asked loudly, head shoved inside of Jonah's fridge, "like- What even is this?" he held up a jar of orange... puree? Ice cream?

"It's a carrot cloud and tangerine puree- Please put it back, it can't be exposed to ai-" Jonah started to scold him, only for Leo to let out a groan and move next to him, promptly shutting him up, "are you okay?"

Leo grimaced, resting his head on Jon's shoulder, "not feeling too hot, no."

Immediately alarm spiked through him and Jonah turned to get a good look of his boyfriend's face. Leo had been over the roof with happiness so far, competitiveness brimming out of him as he kicked Wendy's ass in monopoly and charades.

He hadn't even lost, so Jonah could place the sudden shift of his mood in being a sore loser. Instead his blue eyes were suddenly overly shiny and his face had dipped into fish-belly white, instead of its healthy shade.

"Are you nauseous?" Jonah lowered his voice, as if somehow that would stop Wendy and Lucas, who were sitting right across from them, from listening, "was it the wine? I told you to not chug port-"

"No," Leo frowned, rubbing at his temple, "not nauseous, I just think I have fever, can you check?"

Jonah cupped his face, scoffing when he met overly warm skin, "yeah, you're definitely feverish, baby."

"I meant with a thermometer, Jon. I could've told you that," Leo scoffed and Jon heard Wendy snicker from behind him.

"Okay, everybody get the fuck out of my house," Jonah got up from the couch, chugging the rest of his whiskey and already moving towards where they kept the first aid kit, "out, go aw-"

"No," Leo frowned, "no, Jonah, don't be ridiculous, we're having fun."

"Not anymore we're not-"

"Stop," Leo glared at him sternly and, much to the other three's surprise, Jonah deflated from his righteousness.

"But you're sick..."

"Leo's sick?" Vince frowned, being the only one who hadn't heard their whispers from the kitchen.

"I'm sure it's just the start of a cold and I'm having fun," Leo scoffed, "stay, don't listen to him."

"Are you sure?" Wendy frowned, "it's getting pretty late anyway-"

"Great, now I feel like I ruined the night," Leo grumbled and now they were all hostages. They couldn't possibly leave without making him feel worse.

"Alright, one more round of charades and then we'll go," Vince decided for them, returning to couch with a packet of biscuits, "Leo? You want some?"

"Who gave you my biscuits?" Jonah scoffed as he walked back to the living room, thermometer in hand, "Leo bought those just for me."

"You're a horrible host," Vince rolled his eyes, ignoring his complaints and continuing to eat.

"Maybe you're a horrible guest," Jon shrugged, then softened as he turned to Leo, "under the tongue," he held out the thermometer, "I got you some water, I don't think it's wise for you to take meds right now, since you were drinking."

"Uhm," was Leo's elaborate response, sprawling on the couch so he could rest his cheek on Jon's thigh. Jonah's muscle memory answered before he did, as he slid down on the couch to make it more comfortable and started to pet Leo's hair.

"What?" he snapped, noticing the other three staring at him, "aren't you gonna play your dumb game?"

"Jon," Leo groaned and he sighed.

"Sorry," he mumbled, not really to the others, but to Leo, "go ahead, start the game."

Wendy didn't bother hiding her amused smile as she threw the dice and then fished out a card from the pile of cards, making sure none of the others could see what she had drawn.

Leo moved slightly, holding out the thermometer, "what does it say?" he asked, holding it up. Jon's thermometer was in Celsius, since it was one of the things he had brought with him from europe.

"It says you're sick," Jonah scoffed, glaring at the 38,2º staring back at him, "how the hell did you get a fever this high out of nowhere? You seemed to be feeling alright before..."

"Uhm, alcohol helped," Leo blushed and Jonah squinted at him.

"You mean you lied."

"I mean I felt good enough to not realize the symptoms were bad," Leo moved in his lap so he could look at him in that unimpressed manner, "I didn't lie."

"Symptoms?" Jonah squinted at him, ignoring as he noticed Vince leaning in to whisper with Lucas, both of them with idiotic smiles on, "now it's plural?"

"No..."

"Fever and what else?" Jon wasn't about to risk it, he started prodding Leo all over, just to have his boyfriend sigh and curl up further against him, hiding his face against his stomach.

"Just a sore throat."

"And that just hit you too?"

"Be nice to me," Leo pinched his side, voice muffled by Jonah's shirt, "stop scolding."

"I'm not scolding," Jonah grumbled, moving even more down on the couch and deciding there was no way he could keep facing the coffee table. Instead he changed positions, so he too could stretch his legs on the couch and Leo opened a pleased smile, promptly draping himself over him, "not sick, uh?"

Leo let out a huff, face pressed to his chest and Jonah rolled his eyes, planting his lips on top of his hair, letting his hand go up and down his boyfriend's back. He wished he had caught this on early enough to get some medicine in him, instead of the four glasses of port wine currently swirling in his bloodstream, that certainly weren't helping with the fever one bit.

"Jon," Wendy whispered in his ear, snapping him out of it. He realized Lucas had folded the charades board and put away the cards back in backpack, Vince too had all the glasses in his hands and was tiptoeing back to the kitchen.

"Uhm?"

"We're leaving," she continued to whisper in his ear, "text me if you need anything or want me to cover tomorrow. Love you," she pressed a kiss on his cheek and Jonah blushed, but didn't say anything else, not wanting to risk Leo opening his eyes and realizing all their friends were leaving quietly.

He felt, instead of hearing, as Vince messed up his hair on the way out and Lucas squeezed his shoulder, then the front door creaking and closing with a soft click.

Jonah sighed, relaxing back against the pillow and Leo let out a small noise, squeezing him a little tighter.

"Is it my turn to guess?" he asked, voice slurred by sleep, still thinking they were playing.

"Not yet," Jon lied, continuing to pet his hair, "I'll wake you up when it's your turn."

[derangedanomaly]

Welcome to incorrect quotes with our fav squad (kris, ace, blade, lilian)

Blade: Fuck capitalism. It's a rigged system that keeps us poor and it isn't fair. You shouldn't need to work three jobs to afford basic necessities. Blade, playing Monopoly: Sorry, if you wanted to win you should have tried not being poor.

~

Blade: Hey! Wanna hear a joke?

Ace: Sure.

Blade: Your life!

Ace: Actually, my life isn’t a joke, jokes have meaning.

Blade: Ace no.

~

Lilian, lying on the floor, depressed: I'll never be a cop. I'm gonna have to be a robber.

~

Blade: Lol. Heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you’ll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this.

Lilian: What did you do Blade?

Blade: a Mistake.

~

Blade: HELP! I TOLD LILIAN I'D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN'T COOK!

Ace, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I would help?

~

Ace: While I'm gone, you're in charge Blade.

Blade: Yes!

Ace, whispering to Kris: You're secretly in charge, but I don't want them to feel bad.

Kris: Obviously.

~

Blade: Advice of the day kids, if you ever meet someone who calls Gatorade flavors the actual name of the flavor instead of just the color then they are a certified nerd.

Ace: Yeah but you have to specify, frost glacier or cool blue? You can’t just say blue because there’s more than one blue.

Blade: Blue and light blue, nice try nerd.

~

Blade: I know this isn’t going to end well and I don’t care. So don’t you try and stop me, Lilian!

Lilian: I wasn’t stopping you. I was asking if you had a spare camera so I can record this.

~

Lilian: You are an absolute fucking dork.

Blade, singing: Yeah, but I'm your dork!

Lilian: *sighs* Yeah, you're my dork.

~

I'm gonna do this more often it's so fun

Blep:p

LMAO- I DECIDED TO DO SOME WITH LILIAN AND BLADE

—

Blade: Talk dirty to me, baby~

Lilian: The dishes.

Blade: Wh-

Lilian: They’ve been there for 4 days and it’s your turn to wash them. You still haven’t cleaned them and I have asked you to do so several times.

—

Blade: So you like cats?

Lilian: Yeah.

Blade: *tries to impress them by slowly pushing a glass off the table*

—

Lilian: You have to apologize to them Blade.

Blade: Fine! But I must warn you that this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the person you fell in love with!

(it wouldn't make him a better person 😔)

—

Lilian: Are you ready to commit?

Blade: Like, a crime or a relationship?

—

Blade: I want to kiss you.

Lilian, not paying attention: What?

Blade: I said if you die, I wont miss you.

(he's lying his ass off btw 😭🙏🏻)

—

Lilian: Ugh, crushes are so dumb.

Blade: I know. Whenever I’m near the person I like I just start acting stupid.

Lilian: But you’re always acting stupid?

Blade: ...

Blade: Yeah, don’t think about that too hard.

[capitaletele]

Both inexperience takes were so good and the way Johnny just casually goes "oh yeah ive mostly been with guys" and Cristal has to reconsider some things is interesting because it implies Cristal didn't really know a lot about queer people(i mean bi Cristal for the win but maybe she didnt know idk) and saw it as unusual while it's just perfectly normal for Johnny (i may be overanalysing i apologize). Also i cant quite put my finger on what gives off that impression but i feel like the way theyre acting shows they have different concepts of sex, like it's treated kind of like a taboo subject/something you shouldnt talk about among the people Cristal grew up around and with the Etoiles Noires its just normal and people wont get shamed for wanting to have sex (same thing for not wanting to and/or being repulsed by it)

Okay i think i overanalysed sorry for that essay i just really liked it

Heeeeee thank you! :D :D :D (I'm guessing you were the original prompter? If so I'm glad you enjoyed my takes!)

And neverrrrrr apologize for analysing, my god, I'm pretty sure anyone who writes fic would talk about all the possibilities of the universe 24/7 if they could!! This is what I *want* to be doing so you're doing me a favour here :p

I'm definitely torn about the queerness aspect tbh, because I love the idea that in Monopolis there is no issue with gender and sexuality doesn't matter (this is certainly emphasized I think by the 2022 mise-en-scene where you see male dancers in skirts during the Opening and Naziland for example.) So it follows that there should be no "whoaaa you're queer??" from Cristal (or anyone else.) And I also (obviously) adore the idea of queer!Cristal.

But I also *love* exploring different variations of the world and the characters; that's how you don't run out of ideas, you know? I don't really have one fixed headcanon, I like to think "Okay Cristal is [A]" and then "Okay this time Cristal is [B]" and seeing what happens if you move the cursor slightly one way or the other :D

ANYWAY this is not what you were talking about.

YES I love thinking about the way the Towers people and the Underground people might think about sex and gender in all their configurations. I left the ending deliberately pretty vague so it could be interpreted anyway you wanted :p

Like, perhaps the Towers are supposed to be a Puritan society where Marriage is Sacred and you must Preserve the Bloodlines or whatever, but people in the tunnels don't care and are fucking like bunnies out of wedlock and it's all very "savage" and "uncivilized" (and thrilling.)

Or, on the contrary, perhaps sex is normalized in the Towers because it's like the Roman orgies of the elite, very blasé and consequence-free, but it's more controlled for "regular people" because they have things to consider like how they're going to find the money to raise a kid if they get pregnant?? (And then we get into the whole question of like, how dystopian is Monopolis, really? Is there population control? Massmedia and I have talked about this *so much* haha.)

Or perhaps Cristal was simply taught that people in the tunnels are not "as advanced" or as "open-minded" as people from high society, and so she expects Johnny to be a sort of basic play-boy like she's seen in old movies, but it turns out that he's just as liberated as anyone from high society (and perhaps even more than her).

Or she's still struggling with the media image of him as a violent, uneducated, boorish criminal, and she thought he would also perhaps be a bit homophobic.

OR, her mind is boggling because Johnny just outed a bunch of people to her which shows that he's maybe a little dumb of heart 🤣

OR.... something else I haven't thought of yet, but perhaps you have, and which is just as valid!

[hot-take-tournament]

HOT TAKES TOURNAMENT

(MY) PRE-PRELIMINARY #???

do you guys wanna know what my most hated thing on the planet is???? (other than clowns)

Not a submission

4+ hours spent slowly destroying the relationships between you and the people you care about, watching that treasured spark in their eyes slowly be snuffed out as they make lap after agonising lap around the board, even though the winner was decided in the first 30 minutes?? who could ever say no to that

If I could die, my hell would be spending the rest of eternity sitting around a table playing back to back games of monopoly

So be good or you'll all end up there with me (but don't worry, I'll still let you be the racecar <3)

This isn't a pre-preliminary - oh, i just gotta roll a double, right? oh, no, still in jail, i guess it's your turn - so this won't be in the actual bracket. But still, propaganda is encouraged, and remember to - ok, can't we just say you've won? none of us are coming back from this, what ar- THERE AREN'T ANY PROPERTIES LEFT TO BUY, STEVEN! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU EXPECT US TO DO? - reblog your favourite polls for exposure, exposure like - NO, FUCK YOU AND FUCK YOUR SHITTY HOTELS, STEVE. I'M TAKING YOUR RACECAR AND I'M CUTTING IT'S FUCKING BRAKE LINES

[izzy-b-hands]

steddyhands modern au shortish sick fic bc me & housemate sick.

That's it baybee, comfort food fic time

---

"Ed, I'm not really good at-"

"But we're sick," Ed sniffs sadly. "Here, listen to Izzy cough!"

"Ed, what the fu-" is as much as Izzy gets out before hacking up a lung.

"Isn't Jack available?"

"Is he sick too?" Izzy scoffs, voice scraggly. "He just suggested Jack. Jack!"

"Oh fuck," Ed pops back on the line. "I didn't-"

"I'm not sick. I'll be there."

Stede ends the call before Ed can protest or cough again and starts messaging Roach.

He can do this.

--

"Oh," Stede tries to sound sympathetic. "You look so..."

"Gross?" Izzy grumbles and snuggles down into his armchair. "I know."

"No, no! I mean the drainage from the sinuses is..."

"I am literally cleaning myself as quickly as it appears," Izzy snaps. "What more can I do?"

"Right, of course."

Stede turns to Ed. "My poor thing."

"I'm a very sick silly rabbit," Ed jokes. "Seriously though, you know-"

"I'm prepared to be sick after this," Stede nods. "Mary says it'll work fine since it should time out with their vacation, so I won't have the kids for a bit anyway."

"My hero," Ed opens his arms and wraps him up in them. "Mhm. Stay here."

"I thought you two wanted soup?"

"Oh no," Ed sighs. "Hang on, let me think-"

"I'll cuddle after soup," Stede interrupts gently, and winces at the simultaneous hacking from them both. "Let's get that going, hm?"

Maybe fifteen minutes later there's instant ramen ready and two very happy men almost faceplanted in their bowls for the steam.

"Izzy," Stede chuckles and taps his chin. "Your beard."

"It's washable, believe it or not," Izzy sniffles. "I'll get to eating it; I will. I just need more of this first."

"Please don't scald yourself on the broth."

"I can make no such promises."

"I understand," Stede sighs and turns to Ed. "Same to you. Don't spill it on the couch either."

"I would swim in this if I could," is the mumbled but joyful reply.

"You mean a bath?"

"Huh. Yeah, technically. But if a bath also tasted good."

"That might be a matter of opin-"

Stede pauses at the concerned look on Ed's face. "Well. Anyway, I'm glad this is good for you both. Roach gave me other directions, as did Mary and the kids-"

"Didn't you help care for them if they got sick?" Izzy interrupts.

"I did the cheering up, finding games they could play from bed, side of things. Mary handled the medicine and food and temperature readings and whatnot. I'm not a total idiot about these things even so, it's just...been awhile," Stede replies. "Since anyone asked me to look after them like this. Trusted me with it, I guess."

"What games do you have mind?" Izzy asks, and Stede can't keep his eyes from lighting up.

--

"I know the game says to send you to jail, but you'd never make it," Izzy shakes his head. "Besides, who says we can't make our own rules for Monopoly? Everyone does an at home suspended sentence or something."

"You're not wrong," Stede chuckles. "But I will take my lumps here like everyone else."

"Says the man who somehow owns almost everything right away," Ed snorts, then coughs. "Sorry. Seriously though, I've never known anyone that was actually...good? At Monopoly?"

"Is that a compliment or an insult?"

"Yeah," Ed giggles. "Nah, it's a compliment. The game actually moves along if someone gets it."

"I know very well that you more than 'get' this game," Stede smirks. "You're just being kind and letting me win."

"A bit," Ed admits. "But you are still good at it. Consider it my thanks for coming over and dealing with us."

"Hardly a problem. My lack of experience was more the issue than anyth-Ed," Stede giggles. "Don't make the joke. I know what you're thinking of-"

"Nah, I can't find a good metaphor for sex as Monopoly."

"Shocking."

There's a gentle snore, and they look to Izzy.

Out again, neck crooked painfully, but napping.

"Oh," Stede murmurs and stands to wedge another pillow under Izzy's neck. "Let's get ahead of that problem before it happens."

"Why do we ever stop doing nap time?" Ed yawns. "Kids need naps; why wouldn't adults need them too?"

"We do, especially you two now. And maybe mys-"

Ed gently yanks him down on top of him. "Perfect. You can nap, and now I don't need another blanket."

"You're silly."

"That's permanent, not just the sickness."

"I know," Stede smiles. "Hang on though, one moment."

Izzy shifts and there's a clear grasp for any part of Stede.

"Oh dear."

"You're a wanted man," Ed giggles. "Oh my god wait. You have a monopoly!"

"What?"

"With us!

"I don't think that entirely makes sense."

"I know, but it's so close to making sense!"

Stede sighs softly. "Sleep. You need sleep."

"Shame we can't have you lay on both of us somehow."

He nods. "Hm. Shame. Or..."

--

He cannot move. It simply isn't happening.

Izzy is snuggled in on his right; Ed on his left, his arms around both of them in the king bed in their guestroom (used whenever Stede stayed over consistently; he usually did, but the apartment was a requirement by the court for whenever he had his days with the kids.)

It's the most comfortable he's been in days, even with the coughing and occasional sniffle while they sleep.

If he had a free hand, he'd take a picture of the moment. Both for the memory, and to send to Roach and Mary to show that yes, their advice had been perfect and look! Both patients were still alive, and then some.