#i'm killing myself over this

[popfishjr]

AU in which Zhou Gongjin Gets Over It™️

TWO MONTHS

Zhou Gongjin spent too much of his time thinking about that egotistical asshole strategist.

His close confidant, Lu Su, panicked when Zhou Yu revealed his intentions of killing the bastard.

"Gongjin, pray tell, why would you do such a thing in such times of need?"

Gongjin raised an eyebrow. "Hm?" He said, as if the reason was obvious. "A scheming traitor like him can't possibly be left alive, Zijing."

"How... how is Kongming a traitor in your eyes?"

Gongjin smiled, eyes narrowed. "Consider this, if our battle against the Cao army is victorious, Kongming would occupy Jing Province. Vice versa, if we are defeated, he would take the opportunity to seize our very own Jiangdong."

Gongjin turned to face Zijing, challenging him to say that he's wrong. Zijing said nothing, only sighed in disbelief. Good enough.

THREE MONTHS

It was getting ridiculous. Whenever Zhuge Liang was in the room, Zhou Yu would be looking at him with what his fellow generals would call ‘The Glare™️’ . Zhuge Kongming wasn’t fazed, though. Not even after multiple well-disguised assassination attempts from the Grand Commander himself.

Gongjin wanted nothing more than to wipe that smug, knowing look off the strategist's face. Perhaps he’ll even frame his annoying feather fan on his wall when he finally gets him to die under his hand.

FOUR MONTHS

“Grand Commander, Zhuge Liang has successfully brought back 100,000 arrows.”

Zhou Yu wanted to smash his head against a wooden pillar. This was insanity. He had been so sure he could humiliate and then execute the strategist for failing the task he swore to accomplish. He had given him a ten day limit, but Zhuge Liang shot that down immediately.

“Just give me three days and no more,” he had said, ever calmly fanning his feather fan. Zhou Yu could’ve sworn he saw a glint of mischief in his eyes.

Now, Gongjin was pacing around his room in frustration and disbelief. This Zhuge Liang was smarter than he had anticipated. Zhou Yu just couldn’t allow that.

If this continues, everyone’s going to run to the fan-waving tactician instead of their own Grand Commander, tumbling head-over-heels to beg for his wit and schemes. Gongjin winced at the thought. That would be humiliation beyond measure.

"Gongjin," Lu Su stood awkwardly in a corner. "I heavily advise you to fix your relationship with Kongming."

"I'm not in the mood for this conversation."

"Gongjin!" Lu Su snapped. "Kongming is able to serve as a valuable asset to defeat Cao Cao's attack!"

"You doubt my ability to defeat Cao Cao?" Zhou Yu shot a glare at Lu Su. "I can manage without Zhuge Liang perfectly fine."

Lu Su was silent for a moment. "Gongjin, may I ask a question?"

"Go on."

"Promise me you won't be angered."

Zhou Yu narrowed his eyes. "...Proceed with your question."

"Is the future of Jiangdong the genuine cause of your desire to kill Kongming, or is it because you're jealous of his intelligence?"

Zhou Yu froze. "How dare-" he took in a deep breath and pictured Xiao Qiao playing a piece, and exhaled.

"Out," he pointed to the exit. "Now."

SIX MONTHS

Gongjin had been drinking tea and chatting with Zhuge Liang lately and he hates him more than ever.

“Know yourself and the enemy,” Sun Tzu had whispered in Gongjin’s ear in his dreams. Oh, how well Gongjin was going to know him. It was inevitable to him that he would find a weakness sooner or later. And when he did, he wasn’t planning on holding back.

Within three weeks, Gongjin had invited Zhuge Liang for a chat approximately ten times. He had every one of the strategist's mannerisms and body language memorised. He was surprisingly easy to read, once Gongjin figured out the fun fact that he tended to subconciously channel his emotions into his fan-fanning.

He was also surprised to learn something new each time he spent time with Zhuge Liang. The strategist broke the boundaries of Gongjin’s area of observable knowledge, gifting and expanding his mind with unexplored areas of wisdom, waiting to be comprehended.

Zhuge Liang was always corteous and kind once Gongjin got to know him. Some part of that angered Gongjin. Did Zhuge Liang look down on him so much that he wasn’t worth insulting and getting angry over? Or was Gongjin overthinking? Zhuge Liang was a well of knowledge and wisdom, and he was offering Gongjin the bucket. By god was he thirsty.

SEVEN MONTHS

“Grand Commander.”

“Grand Commander.”

Zhou Yu inhaled sharply, abruptly sitting up and wiping the drool off his face. He turned to see Lü Meng kneeling by his bedside.

“What is it?”

“It is already two in the afternoon.”

“What?” Gongjin got up from his bed, only to hear a clatter as “Mastering the Art of War” fell from his lap to the floor.

Lü Meng stood up and sighed. “Grand Commander, I strongly urge you to burn the book, as you usually do. I’m certain you can already recite its contents without hesistancy.”

Gongjin shook his head. “Such an eye-opening book should be spared from flames.”

Lü Meng frowned. “What makes this one so special? Isn’t the author your rival and sworn enemy?”

Gongjin clenched his jaw and stared out the window. “I suppose so, but that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy his works.”

Lü Meng narrowed his eyes.

EIGHT MONTHS

Zhou Gongjin spent too much of his time thinking about Zhuge Liang. How could anyone be so gracefully smart? Gongjin often caught himself wishing he knew Kongming as children. He could’ve easily asked for his knowledge as friends then. But, wouldn’t that be too shameful now? Asking for his knowledge would be equivalent to admitting defeat, and General Zhou never admits defeat.

NINE MONTHS

Lü Meng wrapped a bandage around Gongjin’s wound as he lay, torso bare, on his bed.

“All done,” Lü Meng stood up. “All you need is rest from now on.”

Gongjin shook his head. “I have some business I need to see to.” He attempted to sit up, grunting with effort as he strained his muscles to push himself upright. Lü Meng wanted to slap some sense into him.

“W- Well, at least put some clothes on first."

Right after Lü Meng finished his sentence, he heard Kongming’s voice come from beyond the entrance. He was talking to one of Gongjin’s assistants outside.

“May you please inform Grand Commander Zhou that I’m here to s-” Kongming’s eyes met Gongjin’s from outside the entrance. He froze, pupils darting from Gongjin to Lü Meng, who was also looking at him. No one spoke for a moment, and Kongming’s face abruptly turned bright red.

“Ah, I see, I-” he cleared his throat. “I’m sorry to disturb you, Grand Commander, I’ll return at a more appropriate time.”

Kongming bowed quickly bowed and left.

Zhou Yu frowned. “He could’ve come talk to me, why did he leave?”

Lü Meng paused, but then let out a small chuckle and shook his head. “Kongming probably wanted you to rest as well.”

TEN MONTHS

Zhou Gongjin spent too much of his time thinking about Kongming.

That night, they shared drinks and got terribly drunk over their past regrets and sorrows that even geniuses like them couldn’t fix. He had noticed Kongming’s clenched fist, his eyes glistening with tears. Setting down his ninth cup of wine, Gongjin reached over and held his fist in his own two hands. Kongming’s hand was cold against his warm ones.

“Your hands are cold as the Yangtze River on a winters night.” Gongjin unfurled his fingers and carressed his palm.

Kongming shook his head in despair. “My blood isn’t enough for my body like my services aren’t enough for the world.”

“You’re more than enough for me,” Gongjin quickly chimed in. “Besides, a bright person like you shouldn’t say such negative words about yourself.”

The strategist looked for all the world like a white rabbit vulnerable to an arrow.

“I’m confused.”

“Hm?” Gongjin stopped tracing circles on Kongming’s hand. The strategist that pissed him half to death with his genius? Confused?

“Don’t you see me as a rival to your wit, General? Or an enemy, as others might say.” Kongming said, staring down at the general holding his hand. “Why are you suddenly treating me so well?”

Gongjin shifted awkwardly, choosing to down his tenth cup of wine. Why did ‘others’ matter?

“Your wit is as sharp as 100, 000 arrows, do you really not know why?”

“Do I?”

Gongjin wanted to laugh. He was certainly drunk enough to do so, but he felt like he was going to have a heart palpitation, so he didn’t. Fuck, the strategist’s game never stops, does it? He knew Kongming wanted him to say it.

“You’re far cleverer than me. I had grown jealous of the way your mind works. I can’t seem to figure you out.”

“I knew that.”

Gongjin tightened his grip on Kongming’s hand. “Don't make this worse, strategist."

Kongming's eyes were still damp from tears, but he gave a small smile at that.

"It's been ten months, Kongming. I've learned that jealousy doesn't serve me,"

"Oh?" Kongming raised an amused eyebrow.

"Besides, you're not a mighty general like me anyways."

That finally did it. Kongming shook Gongjin's hands off in mock offense, his laughter seemed to change his tears into happy ones.

Kongming stopped only when Gongjin quickly took hold of his hand again, as if he were afraid that he'd lose him.

Kongming paused. "There's something else you want to tell me." It wasn't a question, but a statement.

Gongjin was staring at the ground in-between him and the strategist. His eyes darted around anxiously. He had to admit, sometimes he had to remind himself that Zhuge Liang couldn't actually read his mind. Gongjin wondered what would happen if he could. Would he laugh, humiliating him for his shameful thoughts? He couldn't even figure out how Kong ming would react after ten months of knowing him. A strike of panic stabbed the General when Kongming removed his hand, only to wrap both his hands over Gongjin's

"A general's hands shouldn't be shaky, Gongjin." Kongming gave his trembling hands a squeeze. "It isn't recomendable in combat."

Gongjin let out an uncertain breath.

"As... As I've said, I've known you for ten months, and... I had looked down on you, and I know I treated you poorly and I sincerely apologise," his words became rushed. "I'm very thankful that you have managed to put all that in the past, very thankful, and uh, you know, we've been spending more time together as friends lately, and I've gotten to know you so much better these past few weeks, and- and my view on you has changed drastically and I really admire you as a person-"

The torrent of words gushed out of Gongjin's mouth. All the alcohol he drank had broke the dam down.

"And if I'm being completely honest with you, Kongming, think I may be really really drunk and that's probably the only reason I'm able to get these words out but I've really come to like you more than rivals usually do, I think? And- and more than friends do as well, perhaps. Wait actually what if I'm just being weird and regular friends actually all feel like this towar-"

All the questions were blown from Gongjin's head when Kongming tugged him by his lapels and their lips met, like spark meeting the explosive. Kongming's lips were softer than he'd ever imagined, which was funny, considering the words that escaped it could be as sharp as knives if Kongming wanted them to be. Gongjin's breath caught in his throat when he ran a hand through his hair. Good to know all that combing and rice water baths were worth it. He returned the kiss, and revelled in the way it felt like returning home. The silent words of "more than friends" could be heard in the way the strategist leaned into his body, like they were puzzle pieces meant to be.

TEN MONTHS, ONE DAY

"Grand Commander."

"Grand Commander."

Zhou Yu groaned as he sat up, kicking the blankets off. His head throbbed as he turned to see Lü Meng standing by his bedside once again.

"What, is it two in the afternoon again?" Gongjin rubbed his aching temples, chuckling at the recollection.

The general bit his lip. "It's three."

"Huh?" Gongjin scrambled to get off the bed, but Lü Meng immediately stopped him with a hand on his shoulder.

"What's wrong?"

The general looked past Gongjin's shoulder, and he turned to follow his gaze.

"Oh god," his eyes widened at the sight of the famed strategist Zhuge Kongming sleeping soundly right beside him. His hair was loose in places, falling over his face. Wrinkles covered his clothes, and there was a pile of blanket on his legs that Gongjin had kicked off earlier.

“What happened last night?”

“You invited him over, Grand Commander.”

“I- I did… I-” Gongjin groaned and shook his head, which hammered with pain whenever he tried to recollect his memories. “I shouldn’t have drank so much.”

Kongming stirred in his sleep, snuggling closer to Gongjin, who stood up immediately.

“Uh,” He gave Lü Meng an embarrassed look. “I’ll have a change of clothes. Wait for me outside.”

TEN MONTHS, TWO WEEKS

Zhou Yu couldn’t put his finger on why, but his chats with the strategist felt different than usual, lately. Was it because the regular glint of mischief was no longer present in his eyes? Or that it was replaced with a barely detectable glint of sadness and confusion instead? And why was Gongjin afraid of asking “why”?

Every meeting with Kongming felt as if he expected him to say or do something, but what did he want him to do? He wished Kongming would just say it. But who knew, during their next chat over Gongjin’s tea, he actually did.

“Gongjin,” Kongming’s hand balled into a loose fist around the handle of his fan.

“You’re anxious.”

Kongming gave a wry smile. “You know me well.”

“What is it you wish to say?”

“I was wondering if you… if you remember what happened that night.”

Gongjin frowned. “What night?”

“Two weeks ago?” The way Kongming said it like he was pleading hurt Gongjin’s heart. “We were in your room, both of us drunk. That is probably the reason you don’t remember it too well…”

Kongming rambled on, trying desperately to jog his memory. Gongjin had to stop himself from chuckling— Kongming didn’t even mention to him the highlight of that night. That’s alright. He could add that part in himself.

He leaned in for a small kiss, which successfully stemmed the strategist’s flow of words. His face reddened. “Ah.”

“Oh? Who knew one day the general would finally catch the mighty strategist off-guar-” but Gongjin’s words were cut off with an annoyed look from Kongming, who then pressed his lips onto his defiantly, perhaps with a bit too much force as they tumbled over each other again.

[hinamie]

a tribute to celebrate the finale of the manga that has meant so much to me these past few years

[lotus-pear]

mourning black and the death of ideals

[sophsun1]

9-1-1 – 8.06: Confessions

[countess-of-edessa]

the world is so fucked up and i can't help but think the damage is irreparable when i see people talking about how unusual and prudish it is to wait six to ten dates before having sex with someone. ten dates??? roughly like twenty five hours of interaction????? ten old timer burgers and mango iced teas from chilis equals sex?????? the possibility of pregnancy, STDs, emotional devastation, lifelong consequences, not to mention just straight up the possibility of getting murdered, with a STRANGER you have hung out with for maybe like two months???? and that's a LONG TIME???? and if you feel weird about that and don't want to do that that makes you NOT HETEROSEXUAL????? THATS AN ORIENTATION???? BECAUSE ITS SO OUTSIDE OF THE NORM OF HUMAN BEHAVIOR ????? i hate all of you i hate you i hate you i hate you every day i hate and I hate and I hate you

[homielander]

i'm sorry but hotd positing that all women are innately cautious and peaceful and compassionate while men are rash warmongers is not a feminist win! i could see the value in everyone being hesitant to go to war at the onset of the story because it intensifies the tragedy of this house tearing itself apart, but at this stage, rhaenyra has as much reason for bloodlust (if not more) as the men on the show. it's pretty heavily implied that the shock of her usurpation killed her daughter, aemond killed lucerys, and one of aegon's kingsguard snuck into her quarters with the intent to assassinate her. most importantly, she has felt entitled to the throne since she was named heir as a child. she should be incensed! rhaenyra's inaction in the season 1 finale due to a sudden aversion to violence was already stretching believability -- this is the same woman who expressed nothing beyond mild shock at vaemond's beheading, who plotted with daemon to have an innocent man killed to facilitate laenor's escape while declaring that the realm should fear her. to have rhaenyra insist on peace at this point in the story, when war is already well underway, is incredibly irrational.

this problem is not limited to rhaenyra. alicent ordered larys to kill mysaria's network of spies and any suspected traitors in the red keep, presumably without any due process, and neither of these decisions was depicted with the gravity they deserved for a character who was once horrified by any bloodshed. meanwhile, aegon had a few extra ratcatchers executed, and not only was the direction sufficiently ominous, but we also got a lengthy monologue from otto about how it would spell his doom. it is probably pointless to bring up rhaenys because she is written less like a believable human being and more like a mouthpiece for the writers to assert whatever political opinion they believe is correct in a given episode -- but she did very much kill dozens if not hundreds of smallfolk last season. she did do that and very clearly did not care. why is she an advocate against war? for both alicent and rhaenys, there is a strange dissonance where their actions are at odds with their attitudes about opposing large-scale war for the good of the realm. i'm not saying this dissonance cannot exist, but it should at least be acknowledged.

helaena raising concerns about the losses suffered by the smallfolk might have worked in isolation, but for it to accompany everything above is exhausting. can none of these women be allowed to feel for themselves?

[kettlefire]

Time forgets most (DPxDC)

I've been getting too many brain worms that I need to clear out the cramp space that is my idea vault. In doing so, I'm just posting off-handed, random things I've typed up at work. (Partly so my drafts don't just end up like my vault). Without further ado, a much too too long post

°•°•°•°

The movement of time is a much too complex thing for many to understand. The knowledge that time was not perfectly linear. The past did not simply stay in the past. The future is not simply something to look forward to. The present is not simply a fleeting moment.

Time is a complex web. Every point in time, connected to another point in time. A never-ending mess of webs and connections. Things that are to be. Things that can be. Things that are being. Things that will never see the light of day in this universe.

Despite what some may want to believe, Time has no master. Time does not yield to any singular being. That did not mean that Time didn't need a helping hand. A guiding hand to help keep the chaos of time to something just a little more... fluid.

The being came to exist well before the universe had. The being was festered, taught, and nurtured in a small pocket dimension. A small space just like an incubator.

Until the world blossomed around it. Life started to grow. Time kept moving. Living organisms found untimely deaths. Evolved, learned, and grew into the new space around it.

When the first little creature crawled out of the water, Time's keeper was let free. A bumbling little thing, breaming with life and curiosity.

Just like everything else in the world, this keeper wasn't safe from time. It still moved. Brought forth problems and adventures.

As time continued to tick. Moving in every direction, the keeper continued to age. Unlike the rest of the universe, the keeper didn't age the same as others.

Some days, he was nothing but a small boy, frolicking in a field of flowers and bees. Other days, he was a strong middle-aged man. Pulling the strings in just the right way, pushing for a timeline that felt right.

On days that have been happening much more often. He was but a crippled old man, hunched over his staff, and dropping much needed wisdom on the young lives around him.

Being the keeper of time wasn't an easy feat. Being completely out of time, experiencing things in broken order. There was only a clear start, and a jumble of things that followed.

The keeper was content with his life. Watching over the world as it grew and blossomed. He was content with his special kind of solitude.

That was until he saw the boy. In the webs of moments, the keeper's gaze had found him. A boy much too young, suddenly with powers much too great thrusted upon him.

The keeper watched the scenes play out. The tears, laughter, humiliation, triumph, and pain. He watched as the boy's family was ripped from him. Watched the twisted attempt at fixing his life, only for it to go horribly wrong.

He watched the bloodshed and chaos that erupted. The lives ripped apart and destroyed. Not a single sign of life left behind.

Then he watched as the boy, no, not a boy anymore. The keeper watched as the monster tore through the fabric of time. Ripped its way through the thin veils that divided the universes.

Universes that had never known the boy's existence were torn to shreds to. A flight driven with pain and anger.

Despite the keeper having seen the boy turn into such a monster. He could see it in the beast's eyes. The deep-seated need for a family, a life. To be loved.

Something about the boy's life, his story, spoke to the keeper. He found himself reaching out into the web of lives and moments. Finding the moment when things went the most wrong for the boy.

Just like that, the keeper had inserted himself into a life. He pulled the boy out of the cruel stream of time. Filled the boy with the knowledge he needed. Let the boy see just what could happen if he let it.

The keeper of time was soon a simple mentor. A simple deity looking out for the world. Taking on the mantel of Clockwork and finding a new purpose for his life.

A young boy's life has been flipped upside down two times now. And there were certainly more to come. This time, the boy wasn't alone. He had a guiding hand, and a communtiy behind him.

The keeper, no, Clockwork watched with a strange pride and happiness he hadn't felt in a long time. The boy was quickly surrounded by a family that helped him navigate his new powers.

Clockwork, alongside many of the other ghostly beings, watched on with pride as the young boy grew into a strong young man. Mastering powers, taking a stand, and making their home safe.

Despite the best efforts, time always beings problems.

It was one thing for Clockwork. He was the keeper of time. His life has reason to exist as long as time exists. Which will always be. His purpose was infinite.

But this boy... Danny wasn't like Clockwork. He was still partially human and terrified of losing his humanity. Danny's story had to come to an end, it's how time works.

Except, Danny wasn't in the timeline anymore. Clockwork had ensured that, pulled Danny into a separate timeline. An unaccounted for timeline.

He couldn't live here forever, not the way that Clockwork could. Danny needs a life, a family, a place, a purpose. He was still human.

It took more effort than Clockwork would have liked. He had to cash in favors from other deities that he hadn't spoken to in centuries.

It took a combined effort of everyone who cared for the little halfa. The strange boy that teeter on the line between life and death. The boy who had freed the Zone from a tyrant. Who wanted nothing more than for everyone to live a happy and filled life/afterlife.

Getting the magic and spells right was the hard part. But finding the location was easy. A beautiful planet just on the edge of the Milky Way. Unlikely to be disturbed or hurt.

The planet was undiscovered, primative even. Far enough from humans that Clockwork was certain Danny wouldn't be bothered. Only one species lived on that planet. Along the jungle like fauna, and in the water.

Cute little guys, barely bigger than two feet long and one foot tall. There was no name, no knowledge about them. Aside from Clockwork analyzing their way of life.

A simple cycle. They were born, they aged, they played, fed, mated, and then died. A simple but content life.

The aliens weren't unsettling. At least not to anyone who has seen more creatures than what Earth has to offer. It is a strange combination between frog, fish, and squid.

Scurrying around on two legs and four tentacles. A small frog-like face with eyes that seemed to take up half that space. Colors vary from blues to greens to the same sandy brown found at the bottom of the lakes.

Before long, the planet had its own protector. A young boy who once was lost and alone seemed to meld perfectly with these aliens.

Clockwork was always sure of himself. He never let anyone see otherwise. Except, Clockwork hadn't been sure. Not when he had performed the ritual.

As he molded and changed Danny's DNA until the man was a new being entirely. To anyone who didn't know the full story, the boy could easily look related to the aliens.

Gills now painted the sides of his neck, not necessary, but Clockwork felt like it had been. Webbed hands and feet to make transversing the underwater caves even easier. An ethereal, almost siren-like touch to Danny.

It worked out perfectly. Danny settled in easily. Building a routine and bound with the aliens. It hadn't been hard for the little creature to take a liking to him.

Before long, it was routine. Danny would spend most of his time on the planet, watching over his new wards. On some days, he'd portal back to the zone. Spend time with the ghosts and deities that saved his life. To check in on the new govermental system that had been put in place.

It was perfect. Simple and nice. Everyone got complacent. The longer time went on without a hiccup or a problem. The longer Danny was able to rest in his odd solitude. The more people got comfortable.

The more they forgot that time was as cruel as it was forgiving.

It had been just another day cycle. Danny was playing with the most recent litter birth. The first time he had seen the birth, he was more disgusted than anything else.

After the third time, Danny had started getting excited. He looked forward to it. Loved seeing the aliens flourish and grow. Watching them thrive and find more fun in the things Danny creates. Every new fun game or obstacle was always made with the things natural to the planet. Or debris that was caught in its gravitational pull.

Danny was playing with Plop. The little guy got his name, and he always plopped out of the water. Unlike the other aliens, this one didn't crawl out. No, he'd pull himself out of the water with his tentacles, only to plop down on the ground.

Of course, Plop had also been the first alien to approach Danny when he arrived. It's how they formed such a strong bond.

Everything had seemed perfectly fine. The day was rolling along just like it always did. That was until a small group of the more elder aliens suddenly came scurrying into their main cave.

They hadn't waited a second before diving into the water. Danny watched, confused and concerned, as each one of them grabbed one of the young. Before shooting straight into the underwater cave system.

The once bustling and living cave was suddenly eerily quiet and void of any aliens. Leaving behind only the confused Danny in the pool.

At least that's what a certain Green Lantern saw when he followed the trail of retreating aliens.

This planet had been categorized to have no signs of intelligent life. It seemed to have the option to nurture life, but there had been no signs.

When Hal Jordan got word of a seeming spike of activity from the supposedly empty planet, he had added it to his rooster.

A quick peek, just a look into what kind of life might be starting to grow there. The little aliens he had seen were adorable, sure. But they didn't seem all that evolved. Still in their evolutionary journey.

That was until Hal saw him.

Now, Hal was no stranger to running into ethereal beauty. It's what happens when someone interacts with aliens on a basic daily. That was something he was used to.

Except, all his breath seemed to be knocked out of him completely. The cave alone was stunning, a stark contrast from the almost barren surface he had first seen.

A deep, shimmering blue pool that vanished into the rocky space around it. Trees, bushes, and flowers decorate the area. It looked almost too good to be true. Like an oasis in the middle of a desert.

Then there was the being that caught all of Hal's attention. Bright blue eyes that looked like gems, pale blue-tinged skin. Long black and white hair seemed to look almost like the night sky. A deep abyss littered with stars.

The closest thing that Hal's brain supplied was a siren. A beautiful, ethereal creature that lured men to their deaths. As beautiful as it seemed, Hal knew there could easily be danger.

Except, the creature didn't attack or threaten him.

Instead, he seemed almost shy. Mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water, sharp deadly teeth flashing in the light with each motion.

Hal had just opened his mouth, taken a hesitant step forward. He wanted to know, and he needed to know how this happened. There wasn't supposed to be an intelligent, sophisticated life on this planet.

The moment Hal's lips parted, the creature let out a trill. A sound that seemed more scared than aggressive. Before suddenly, the beautiful creature vanished into the pool.

Hal moved before he could think, rushing to the edge of the pool. He peered into the crystal clear water, just in time to take the webbed feet of the creature vanish into a tunnel.

Now that left Hal with two options. He could either report this and wait for backup...

Or...

Or...

He could jump inside. The ring would protect him, and his lungs would be fine. Perks of being a Green Lantern.

That option seemed much more tempting to Hal. Nothing about this scream an outright threat. He felt more like a strange imposing on someone's home. A home that was meant for safety and protection of the young.

Yet, the shimmering water seemed to be calling to Hal. Something in him was trying to push him to get inside. To find the beautiful creature and learn more. Learn how this happened.

Without realizing it, Hal Jordan sealed his fate the moment he dipped a finger into the cool pool. Rippling the steady surface just slightly.

Just enough to get him wrapped up in the strange web created by time and its keeper.

[zombie-hickey]

He'd take one look at me and wouldn't be able to kill me. I'm just too fuckable and adorable. One look at me and he'd be in love. He'd love me. You just don't get it. I'm the exception to his wraith. You don't understand. I'm definitely his type.

[fishareglorious]

Jessica is on the chat, she's just too busy asking Blonney what 'gay' means.

[uncanny-tranny]

Every time you think, "Oh, I don't have [x condition], I'm basically cured!" that is the devil talking. You aren't cured, you are likely going through periods of your symptoms waning. Don't cease whatever you're doing to help yourself, like medication, for instance, because it's likely you still have the conditions or symptoms, even if you aren't noticing them as frequently or severely.

[saucy-mesothelioma]

Oh Sazz Pataki of Only Murders in the Building, my favorite slightly clueless absolute player of a lesbian, they could never make me hate you.

[raticalshoez]

i'm having hyperfixation drought so i did what i did best and created a crossover episode

[flowerakatsuka]

feeling mushy about them today....

[imminent-danger-came]

You know MK thought everything would finally stop the moment he sacrificed himself. Like, finally, his friends would be able to live a peaceful life. Apocalypses could finally stop happening, the harbinger of chaos would be gone. He'd be gone. They'd be safe. And that was just never an option

[maulfucker]

So fucked up that obimaul is a rarepair. What do you mean not everyone is obsessed with enemies to lovers with a Force connection, where one side is completely obsessed with the other who barely acknowledges him (but is just as affected)

[sayakxmi]

Saiouma Puella Magi AU, but Kokichi takes Madoka's role and Shuichi takes Homura's.

For one, Kokichi's too naturally distrustful to just hear "I can grant you any wish :)" and not think ok where's the hook. So he just does what no one ever has & essentially interrogates Kyubey, so he knows it all even before he gets to make a contract. So, some of his classmstes are MGs & he won't become one himself BUT he still ends up tagging along to just protect them in his Kokichi ways. (Though I'm entertaining Kokichi lying about being a magical girl, because, well, it's Kokichi).

(I also got a small idea of Gonta being a magical girls and Kokichi originally tagging along him into labyrinths, Gonta also makes him a magic gun from the toy one he had, and at some point witches out & Kokichi manages to kill him with that gun. So he always has that spare Grief Seed on himself, bc it's still his best friend & he can't handle the idea of just giving it away or using it himself (he does anyway in the end).)

Shuichi prolly ends up being a new kid & it isn't like MadoHomu, the ppl who reach him first are Kaede & Kaito, classic. Kokichi's there, too, but he's his usual sus self. He's actually discouraging ppl from making a contract when they find out magic and miracles are real, which absolutely includes Shuichi. He's very vocal abt it, but he won't explain stutf, bc 1) he's a liar, so who'd believe him? and 2) he doesn't want them to witch out upon finding out the truth or, idk, murder everybody Mami-style.

Anyway, fast forward, bad things happen bingo & by the end of the run most charas are dead, there's Walpurgis nachting, and he makes his wish to bring back the ppl who died notably not as magical girls. Contract signed, he fights & fails, rip. I also thought it was similar to how he thought he could end the killing game by himself - he though he could finish Walpurgisnacht by himself, too. And he failed in both times. Whatevs.

Shuichi doesn't actually make his time travel wish for Ouma specifically, he wants to save all his friends. Timelines are messy esp at first bc he either tells then or it backfires or just makes himself look very sus bc he's trying not to tell them. He also realizes why Kokichi hadn't told anybody aby witches at some point, bc, yeah, it messes them a lot, assuming they believe it.

Still, Kokichi ends up one of the few people who are nearly always giving him a chance, not necessarily out of belief, but out of pragmatism - bro can stop time & knows the truth, that's just too useful. So they often work together & Shuichi grows closer to him but still we ain't there yet. But the thing is, Shuichi's time travel still makes Kokichi more & more powerful with each timeline, bc Shuichi usually goes back after Kokichi dies, so the universe figured out this guy's life's important. Anyway, another notable thing is the iconic Homura kills Madoka scene, but it's Saiouma with guest stars of Kaito & Maki. It's Walpy, it's not defeated yet, but the training trio are spent & just kinda accept their fate of turning into witches together. And then, boom, Kokichi appears & steals their Soul Gems for a sec & he's like did u know you can cleanse your Soul Gem with a darkened one? But it's a lie & he quickly tells them so, he just had a spare Grief Seed after cleansing his Soul Gem & he needs them to do some stuff. Shuichi can travel back in time & fix things, and Maki & Kaito are needed to fight Walpy here. He actually questions what happens to the timelines Shuichi leaves behin, and ofc he doesn't know. There's a chance they remain, so Kokichi needs Maki & Kaito to fight Walpy here.

Kaimaki leave, and Shuichi finally looks at Kokichi & realizes sth is Wrong. Kokichi struggles to hide how he's trembling & grimacing, and it's Kokichi, so obviously it must be extremely bad. Shuichi dreadfully realizes something worse, and he weakly asks Kokichi why aren't his wounds healing. And Kokichi just falls, laughing weakly, and Shuichi catches him & searches for his Soul Gem and, God, he knew it. It's nearly completely black. Kokichi laughs & admits he lied abt having two Grief Seeds, he only had one he never wanted to use. But they'll have the second one soon, so no need to worry. He asks Shuichi to maybe destroy his witch form as it's hatching, so he'll have the Grief Seed without any fighting… and he admits that he hates fighting, he hates this magical world and all its violence. He says that Kaito was right in calling him a coward, even here he just can't handle the idea of fighting any longer, he's so sorry. And Shuichi tells him he ISN'T a coward. He was scared, but he always followed everybody, trying to help, and when push came to shove he would always make a contract for the benefit of others rather than himself. He's a lot of things, but a coward isn't one. Kokichi actually tears up hearing that, and Shuichi promises he won't let him fight ever again, and especially he won't let him turn into a witch and hurt anybody, because he knows it's the last thing he's ever wanted. Even now he only accepts turning into a witch to help them fight to keep others safe. So Shuichi won't let him. Kokichi probably apologizes and thanks him and then he dies.

Keeping Kokichi from fighting starts off as a side quest that gains importance with time, bc it's something Shuichi won't compromise on (ah, trauma), which leads him to occassionally neglect others a bit, which makes them more likely to get hurt & ironically Kokichi more likely to make a contract, especially since he gets more powerful & Kyubey is more interested in him with each timeline. And that also makes him witch out super quick. Shuichi's paying more attention to him & over time grows resentful of others for how they're treating him. To Shuichi it's no question that Kokichi cares & is just doing his best to help, but nobody realizes that.

But the biggest obstacle in keeping Kokichi from fighting is actually Kokichi himself, bc he's too smart and nosy, lmao. Even if he knows nothing, he will find out quickly. Doesn't help that Kyubey wants him to make a contract.

Also, obviously Kaito is Sayaka-coded and Maki could be Kyouko-coded, so that's a thing, BUT it's usually Maki that witches out. Kaito is usually pretty close, but Kokichi intervenes & he survives, but Maki later cracks on her own (and since in the new timeline Kokichi isn't there, Kaito's the one to die, so he's still the secretary). So it's Kaito who gets the dramatic sacrifice. I imagine he genuinely hoped you could bring somebody back if you tried Very Hard & Kokichi called him a moron bc obviously it's not possible. If it was there'd be far less witches that there are. But it's Kaito, he doesn't listen to reason. So, Kokichi follows him to the labyrinth. At first Kaito's mad cuz what if Kokichi being there ruins the plan? Maki hates his guts! But eventually he gets hit pretty hard, and Kokichi is near immediately by his side, trying to help him get up, which kinda makes Kaito short circuit a little bc wait Kokichi's trying to help? But witch!Maki attacks them & Kokichi pushes Kaito away & gets caught himself (and choked until unconsciousness, naturally). Anyway, Kaito gets him away, Shuichi catches Kokichi & Kaito makes up his mind about going down with Maki & asks Shuichi to tell Kokichi that he's sorry. He doesn't get him, but he got hurt trying to protect him, so he'll believe in that if nothing else. F.

As for The WishTM, in the last timeline Shuichi lashes out at Kokichi for his willingness to just become part of the system. In no timeline has his wish actually helped, it did NOTHINHG, which OUCH but it also makes Kokichi think out of the box more & he becomes the Law of Cycles. And Shuichi realizes what is happening & freaks out bc Kokichi's doing it bc of what he told him & like Homura they end up having a momentTM in space & Shuichi remembers. He feels a lot of guilt even tho he also questions whether anything was real, but if it was, he pushed somebody he far too realized he loved into erasing himself from existence.