#i'm just doing myself a refresher on this subject as i write

[soysaucevictim]

Thinking abt some demonym stuff I've been locking in whenever I'm doing fic research.

Like - I knew for awhile that Latino ≠ Hispanic, they have overlapping populations, but they are not the same thing. Something I think a lot of white/adjacent USAmericans get mixed up all the time.

Hispanic means basically any hispanophone / dominantly Spanish-speaking group. So that includes places like Spain, Mexico, Costa Rica, etc.

Latino refers to diaspora (in the US) from Latin America - so Spaniards (more specifically, Spanish Americans) are not considered Latino. This group can include Brazilian Americans, for example, even though they come from a dominantly Portuguese-speaking country. (Though this IS a controversial use case - so generally, one should use a more specific demonym unless individual gave you the OK around 'em. Demonyms like Brazilian American or brasileiros americanos...)

[thankskenpenders]

Happy new year, everyone! Welcome to 2024, the year that will mark the 10th anniversary of Thanks Ken Penders. I'd like to go over my plans for the blog for this year.

First of all: in the very near future, I'll have a post with my thoughts on Sonic Dream Team, and I'm sure I'll write one last Sonic Prime review once the final episodes drop on the 11th. I've also been sitting on an unfinished piece about the Sonic LEGO sets. I wanted this to be longer and more detailed piece that not only reviewed the sets but also went into the weird disconnect between homogenized image of Sonic the Brand and the actual fiction it's based off of, but it'll probably end up getting cut down a lot just so I can put something out. Let's just say I did a fun little thing with one of the sets.

Second: yes, I would like to return to regular TKP updates this year. As I've said many times, I wanted to do this in 2023, but I've been suffering from creative burnout after finishing SLARPG and have generally been unable to focus on any of my creative goals this past year. I'm hoping that this year will be better and I'll be able to get back into the swing of covering Archie Sonic issues. Even doing one issue every week or so would be vastly preferable to continuing the hiatus. I'm still only halfway done!! But aside from burnout, my other main hurdle is that I need to reread my own archive to refresh myself on all these things after nearly three years away. This will take some time.

The thing is, though, this year I'll have an extra incentive to go back through my previous writing and brush up on all things Archie Sonic. Because you see...

I've decided that I want to make a video essay about Penders. The comics, the copyright battle, The Lara-Su Chronicles, everything.

The why

I've thought about doing this before, but I never committed to the idea. I was too busy with gamedev, or I thought it'd end up being too long, or I figured that there were already enough videos on the subject, or I just lacked confidence in my ability to put together a video essay. So I told myself it wasn't meant to be, and let the multiple YouTubers who have cited me as a source on their own Penders videos fill that void.

Recently, though, a few things have happened that have convinced me it might be time. For one, YouTube video essays/media retrospectives/etc. are just getting longer and longer. When Quinton Reviews is out here doing 21 hours of videos on Sam & Cat, a subpar Nick sitcom that only lasted one season, I don't feel so crazy for wanting to make a video about several hundred comic books and two lawsuits that'd be at least an hour or two long lmao. Admittedly, I've also been self-conscious about doing a long video essay like this as a trans woman who has yet to do any vocal training. But these days I feel like I see a lot more transfem YouTubers who have done little to no vocal training, and that's given me more confidence on that front.

But the big one was Hbomberguy's recent plagiarism video. As I sat there watching it, I kept thinking about the time I found a CBR article that was just a crude 800 word summary of my two previous articles on Penders, published by a CBR writer who's put out over 4000 articles since 2019. If I've already been plagiarized before, and my writing is so frequently passed around as a go-to source on Archie Sonic drama, then I wouldn't be shocked if there were YouTubers out there straight up just plagiarizing me. I don't watch other peoples' videos on Archie Sonic, so I'd never know! So if people are just gonna paraphrase me when covering these topics anyway, why not take matters into my own hands and make what I would consider to be the definitive video on the subject? If hacks like James Somerton and iilluminaughtii can churn out these shitty video essays and people will still watch them, surely it can't be that impossible to make my own, right? (And also, uh, Hbomb literally told me I should make the video lol. If you're reading this, thanks for the encouragement.)

The what, how, and when

So here's the plan.

Part of this video essay will be an adaptation of my Medium article on the recurring themes of Ken's Archie Sonic run, with its content touched up and expanded upon. There were a few things I skimmed over in the article because I didn't want it to get too long, but again, people are out here watching ten hour videos about bad Nickelodeon sitcoms now. I can get away with elaborating a little more. I can add a few paragraphs talking about the Chaos Knuckles arc, or throw in a little more historical context I've discovered in the years since.

After covering the comics, the back half(-ish?) of the video will be dedicated to the copyright battles and their ensuing controversies, trying to give an accurate picture of what actually went down, the sheer scale of how bad Archie fucked up, and what our takeaways should be. This will have some similarities to my New York Magazine article on the subject, but I'll be rewriting it from scratch. I REALLY had to keep things short for that article because I was already way over the expected word count, and my tone was a little more straight-laced than normal because I was trying to keep things Professional. I can riff more and insert more of my own opinions this time, like I normally would.

I'll inevitably have to touch on some of Ken's Bad Tweets when discussing things that have happened after the lawsuits, but I don't want the video to just devolve into a list of times people got mad at him on Twitter, so I'm gonna try to keep that to a minimum in favor of focusing on his actual work. Things like the Scourge the Speed Demon incident and his continued statements on certain characters' copyright statuses probably warrant mentioning, though. And finally, assuming that the book really does come out this summer, I would like the grand finale of the video to be about those first couple chapters of The Lara-Su Chronicles.

I don't currently know when this video will get done, but it'll probably be in the back half of the year, especially with me waiting for the book to either drop or get delayed yet again. But I've actually already started writing a bit of the script, and will keep chipping away at it for a while.

So, uh, yeah, look forward to that? Wish me luck?

[post-maester]

I had a fucking wonderful conversation with a Director who is a trans woman today.

I originally responded to an ad of hers looking for a transfem video editor for a documentary about trans people, but I was several months late. I specifically responded knowing I may not get the gig, but I wanted to work with her on this project that I felt was so important. It was important to me as a person developing a career in film, it was important to me as a trans girl hoping to engage and give to a community I want to be a part of, it was important that a project get made that could help people like me figure out what the fuck is going on with their identities.

So I waited for a response. Eventually one came. We set up a meeting for this afternoon, and the conversation we had was euphoric. I was so anxious and in my own head about the whole thing, but when it came time to talk, I felt like I was unapologetically myself while talking to her. I didn't need to mask, or change how I behaved for her. I just was. It felt wonderful. I've never had that with another person before, I think.

We talked about film work, trans experience, and MOTHERFUCKING TTRPGs!!!!!!!!! She called me "girl" in conversation and that was butterflies in my tummy. When I mentioned I was only 3 months on HRT she unashamedly and excitedly exclaimed that my chest was going to start hurting soon, and that lack of timidity about the subject was so fucking refreshing.

She mentioned how she enjoyed taking on the role of teaching younger trans people and being motherly. I added that my friends say that I'm the same way, but that I don't really have someone to be that way for me. It was a strange feeling to realize mid-conversation that I may need something like that at all. I never felt like I wanted a motherly force in my life, but maybe as I find myself in femininity that's something I need. My husband can only do so much to help me, and he's not exactly the posterchild for this sort of thing.

Nearing the end of our conversation, she told me to keep in touch and ask any questions if I need. But then she mentioned that we could go to get our nails done together sometime soon (I'd mentioned my experience with hand/nail dysphoria from a few days ago). I shut down. I stared at my screen through to her silently for a moment. I then stuttered, trying to answer. She asked if I was okay and if she overstepped any boundaries. I admitted that I needed a moment to restart my brain. Then I explained that I don't have any feminine friends to do "girl stuff" with. I've never been able to before. The idea excited me beyond belief. I said yes emphatically. I almost started crying a little, to be completely honest.

We said goodbye, and I closed the call.

Im doing a little tiny cry now, I feel so fucking good. I feel so proud of myself for trying for this and sticking with it. Proud of myself for not canceling because of my anxiety. Proud of myself for allowing me to be me unapologetically with absolutely no fabrication for the pleasure or comfort of another person.

Writing this now in bed. No other plans until later tonight. That call took a lot of my energy. Time to rest.

Night night💜

[hotheadedhero]

Request Rules!

Currently closed! Here for more info

Here be the masterlist!

I currently accept headcanon/one-shot requests for 2007, 2012, Bayverse, and Rise. 2003 will be included once I've watched the show all the way through and refreshed myself (will later edit when that changes). Or, if you do want to make an 03 request, nothing plot-heavy

Be patient with me for I am a lowly worm trying my best. I'd like to adhere to a schedule but, unfortunately, my brain doesn't function well with routine. Whilst writing tmnt fics is my lifeline, it can be quite overwhelming, too. If you're waiting a while for your request, it's probably because of that or work but I will try my darndest to fulfil your wishes

Keep your requests simple-ish if you can, please. It's often quite difficult to follow through how I believe an idea can go if half the story has already been written for me

I hold the right to refuse a request should I choose to. This isn't anything malicious, sometimes I may just struggle with what has been asked of me

Where smut/18+ is concerned, I'm still a little nervous about uploading anything of the sort. That doesn't mean I won't give it a go, though. As long as you're prepared to deal with some potentially awkward writing XD

I love receiving fluff and angst requests! Nothing is too cute or too dark. I'm not past getting into something gory

This may seem like a weird one but I reckon I very much prefer to stick to human reader fics. Can't quite explain this one. Only that's how I always envision the circumstances when I'm writing

With 'reader' specifications in mind, I default to fem unless directly asked to write in gn. It's not that I don't think I could make a male reader but I definitely don't feel as confident

No Turtle x OCs, please. Just general reader stuff :)

I also won't write x child readers. The best way I can describe it is by explaining how I go about my process. I put myself in the reader's shoes during my writing to help me flesh out a story. It's probably why I also can't do male readers because it's a perspective I can't confidently replicate. The same goes for child readers, I'm an old lady who has forgotten what those youthful days were like 😭 At least, this is how it feels with my writing method, idk

No Tcest, which also means no poly x reader stories. I don't think I need to explain this one

(This may be edited along the way subject to any changes that I deem necessary at the time)

Finally, may everyone have fun and enjoy themselves on this board! We're all just here to enjoy the spoils of creation 💚🫶

[veliseraptor]

January Reading Recap

Thousand Autumns: vol. 3 by Meng Xi Shi. This book is - I don't want to say growing on me because it was never not one I was enjoying, but it certainly got interesting in a new way in this volume. The shift in the relationship between Yan Wushi and Shen Qiao feels like an important one, even if it doesn't last, and the glimpses at a background for Yan Wushi not elaborated upon certainly have me intrigued.

I have the whole epub of the fan translation for this one and might end up just reading it through to the end without waiting for the official translation volumes to come out (though I'll probably read those too, because I like reading more than one translation where I can).

Conspirituality: How New Age Conspiracies Became a Health Threat by Derek Beres, Matthrew Remski, and Julian Walker. Sometimes you read a book on a really interesting subject and it just kind of makes you want to read a better book on that subject. Based on a podcast of the same name, this book was...fine? But it remained relatively shallow, and heavy on the examples rather than the analysis. It was more of a survey of instances where health and wellness/conspiracy thinking intersect than it felt like it was taking a deep look at where and why those intersections happen. It was interesting, and I learned some things, certainly, but it didn't quite dig as deep as I wanted to go.

In the Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado. What a fascinating piece of work. I don't have a whole lot of coherent things to say, except that I don't read a lot of memoir and I'm glad I read this one. I think I liked it better than I liked Machado's short story collection - certainly it was doing very interesting things with form and style in a narrative built loosely on the skeleton of a memoir. It's funny, because I could see myself finding the conceit here irritating or pretentious, but for whatever reason I think the vulnerability of the project undercut that aspect for me.

Dead Country by Max Gladstone. Mostly this book reminded me that I really want to reread the Craft Sequence, so I started doing that. Calling this an intro to that world feels weird - it doesn't really feel like an entry-point to me, despite the fact that it's being marketed that way - but perhaps that's me with the benefit of having read the other books but slightly too long ago to clearly remember them. (Hence the reread.)

Based on my vague recollections I remember liking his other books better than this one, but that's me comparing some books I really liked to one that I enjoyed but wasn't blown away by. But I'm still coming back to read the next one in this series, so I can't speak too harshly of it.

Faraway Wanderers by Priest. I really enjoyed this one! I love the way that Priest writes banter/interplay between two characters, and she definitely has a thing for people who are equally fucked up being fucked up together that I appreciate. Another thing to appreciate about this one is how (relatively speaking) tight it is - there's not a whole lot of wandering, despite the title, and the plot keeps moving in a pretty linear direction from start to finish. I love my longass cnovels with multiple arcs, but it was a little refreshing to read one this contained. It's not in my upper echelons of danmei I've read so far, because it doesn't hit my favorite tropes quite as hard, but I'm glad I finally got around to reading it.

Some Desperate Glory by Emily Tesh. Probably wins my favorite book I read last month challenge. The ending got a little deus ex machina for my taste, strictly speaking, but not so much that it ruined my experience - and I genuinely enjoyed the refreshing experience of reading a book that was digging into some messy shit in a way that I found satisfying. I felt like some of the character development could've used more breathing room/space, but maybe I'm just picky about that, and the propulsive pace did keep me reading this one so fast I think I finished it in two days.

This is really petty but I also appreciated the author's willingness to have the protagonist/narrator be not the picture of good progressive politics. It allowed room for the, you know, development, and in the current genre climate I don't take it for granted.

Spin Dictators: The Changing Face of Tyranny in the 21st Century by Sergei Guriev and Daniel Treisman. I don't quite know what I feel about this one. The basic argument Guriev and Treisman are making is that dictators have changed strategies in the 21st century from what they call "dictatorships of fear" to "dictatorships of spin." I think the main critique I came out of it with has to do with the authors drawing too stark a line between their dictatorship "types" and not necessarily acknowledging that a leader can move between them, or use elements of more than one "type" in different places. Like any binary, it obscures fuzziness of categories and potential overlap in favor of trying to make clear distinctions. This is particularly visible in the way that their writing about Putin feels dated just from the initial 2022 publication date.

There were a couple other things that struck me as weird (I suspect the authors might be a bit to the right of me, and there's at least a whiff of classism about their characterization of "the informed" as a class of people); on the whole it felt worth reading but also like a book I want to talk to someone else about to help process my thoughts.

Lords of Uncreation by Adrian Tchaikovsky. I love Tchaikovsky's work, and this conclusion to the Final Architecture series is no exception to that. And that's all, she wrote.

Shigidi and the Brass Head of Obalufon by Wole Talabi. I wanted to like this book more than I did - not that I didn't like it, but there's so much interesting stuff going on that it felt like didn't quite add up to a greater whole. A solid three star read, though, in the sense of "I'm glad I read it, and if someone else mentioned they were reading it I would probably provide my favorable impression, but I'm not going to go out of my way to recommend it to others."

There's definitely sequel bait at the end, though, and I probably will read the sequel if/when it appears. I'm intrigued enough, and the setting/worldbuilding is different enough - to get me that far.

--

I'm currently rereading Three Parts Dead by Max Gladstone (Dead Country made me do it) but have We Are Satellites by Sarah Pinsker proximately on my list for a book club; I'm on a bit of a fiction kick looking at The Mountain in the Sea by Ray Nayler, He Who Drowned the World by Shelley Parker-Chan, The Water Outlaws by S.L. Huang, and Too Like the Lightning by Ada Palmer as possible next-ups as well. I'll get back to my long, long nonfiction to-read list eventually. (in the meantime I've got my long, long, long fiction to-read list.)

[cboffshore]

Back when I started writing An Evening with Operation: Cortado, I made myself a little promise: every time I felt grouchy about something and felt the need to vent (not even always fandom related, tbh, sometimes it was just silly everyday stuff), I would vent and then follow up with a bit of worldbuilding for the fic. Anything at all to redirect the grouchy energy.

Well. I've been grumpy lately, about a lot of things and places and events, and I have fallen behind on my atonement. However, I'm solidly in OSSAS season on my writing calendar, which means pure Cortado thinking isn't on the table.

So, to make sure I hit both targets: I'm going to blather about my OC Landon for a while. And then it's going to turn weirdly dramatic and poignant, I think, but... it's worth it, I promise.

(Note: if you are not caught up on the OSSAS series or Cortado, OR are not in the market for potential spoilers for either of those, do not proceed beyond this point until those are no longer true statements for you. This is about to spoil both some in-text and meta stuff for both works, and also won't make sense without knowing either of those. Also, some of this may be subject to change; this is where Landon sits right now.)

So, if you need a refresher, here's

History of Landon 101 - Meta Studies

While working on Coughing Up Feathers, I needed a named background pirate for Nadakhan to address... By name. I didn't like any of the background mook options, so I decided a homemade OC would be better. As a show reference and a small apology for how much bullshit I was about to put Nadakhan through, I decided to make the episode 61 crew naming dream a reality and just... give him a guy who was already named Landon. It was funnier than just pulling one of the background minifigures from a set and using them, at least, and it ended up being useful for If I Can Think (Of Something Clever).

That's as far as it was ever supposed to go. Until Cortado hit, and I needed people to populate the Skybound Death Club, and I thought... hey. He'd have a fun insider crew perspective. And there he was! Of course, even though I never use it in Cortado (and idk if I'll have space to), that meant cooking up a backstory for him, just like I did for everyone else around that table. So, for the first time ever:

Here's how Landon ended up on the pirate crew (aka History of Landon 102 - In-Universe)

Circa episode 61 - after the Landon crewmate mission flops and it's established the Keep is accepting any civilian that makes it up and wants to be there - Landon is a perfectly normal, somewhat aimless, fresh out of high school guy still a little woozy from a yearlong bout of senioritis. He's either on a gap year or just waiting to head off to college, where he'll major in Undecided and waffle about a Miscellaneous minor for a while; he doesn't know. I don't know, either. For now, Landon's just doing whatever catches his eye (and can be financed on a low-paying summer job taking tickets at the history museum).

Anyway, he's off doing Stupid Teenager Shit with his buddies (nothing criminal - maybe goofing around on a playground after it's closed, leaf blower on a merry-go-round type Stupid Teenager Shit. A few notches under whatever made Gerard Way write "Teenagers"), and naturally: they get around to chatting about the bizarre stuff going on in the city around them. Specifically: the landmasses going missing, and those big moving dark spots above the clouds, and if there's a link - or if it's just two competing alien factions trying to out-weird each other.

In fact... there's a piece of lawn slowly tearing itself out of the ground twenty feet away. Right now.

Seeing this, someone goes: hey. Here's an idea. Whoever falls off the merry-go-leafblower first has to get on that chunk of land and see where it goes. Who's in?

All hands shoot up. Everyone here is into Stupid Teenager Shit, after all, and this sounds like the qualifier round for the Stupid Teenager Shit Tournament. Landon revs up the leafblower and everyone clambers on.

I feel like you can fill in the blanks from there.

Anyway, Landon makes it all the way up, and gets onto the crew - with honors, based on the gleam in the weird floaty captain's eye once he tells him his name. No resume, no interview - he's immediately on first-name basis here and has no idea why, but hey, it beats taking tickets for temp exhibits!

With that, and the brief, bizarre career in piracy that follows: Landon wins the Stupid Teenager Shit Tournament, and nobody down on the merry-go-leafblower ever finds out. Reset and all that.

Which segues nicely into the big thing I wanted to wax poetic about:

What's Landon up to after the reset?

Minor Witness spoilers (or maybe not - I have no clue if I'll even be able to write this in): getting whacked by a soul slurping sword is kind of a life-changing event if you remember it. Cortado rules hold that those who are dead at the time of the reset are the ones who might remember it (this is to keep all those EMs in there out of the party, just because I can), and Landon - patron saint of plot convenience - gets lucky! The sword prison counts as being dead, or at least dead enough to land him back on the high school stage when the reset kicks in during graduation, all his memories intact. And that's a weird, weird feeling, to know that somewhere in this existence, you have technically been dead before you were ever handed your diploma. (I think. I've never experienced that but I'm sure it would be odd.)

His first thought: okay. I'm not going to any playgrounds after dark this summer.

His second thought: maybe I'll major in history. Figure out what that crew's deal really was.

Landon manages to keep the summer museum job going strong; he finds he likes the art wing best, and he takes that to college with him: history major with as many Era of the Stone Warrior specialities as possible, art minor for the fun of it (and for the very legitimate underwater basketweaving elective). Once or twice, he asks his classmates if anyone's even seen a pirate recently or lost a parking space to the sky, but nothing takes.

He starts to wonder if maybe he just spaced out during graduation and dreamt it all up.

But it feels so real. And he's paid all that tuition money in pursuit of answers, so... why not see where it goes?

How about after The Merge? How'd he find the club?

In the Cortado timeline, Dragons Rising (when the fic takes place) happens approximately ten years after Skybound would have. This gives Landon enough time to finish his four year bachelor's (maybe five - he seems a super senior type) and get well into a graduate program. Surprise, surprise: he's got an era picked out and he's studying art history and artifact dating front that era, all those unanswered questions about his deleted experience on the brink of being solved.

As such, his internship hours place him as a materials analyst and research assistant at some Crossroads-based inter-realm art preservation museum institute thing. I haven't picked a good name yet. Sue me. Anyway, he's enjoying his work, but nothing's really standing out to him... until his staff advisor tells him they've got a special assignment for him to lead a team on. They bring him to a small, one-painting exhibit, almost entirely set up... except for the plaque. That's where Landon comes in, because nobody else on staff has been able to get it, and there's some stuff in here that kinda lines up with his chosen focus era, right? Why not throw the intern at it, see if he sticks and can come up with something informative?

Anyway, Landon and his advisor round the corner and see this:

(Why? Because Landon is MY OC and I get to choose which of my works he interacts with. It's pretty much all of the Skybound related ones, by the way; they're all connected because I say so.)

Despite this painting being entirely anachronistic and making no sense... Landon's seen it before. Something like it, anyway, or someone, in the flesh and at a fitting she did not want to attend, and a much lamer outfit...

Oh, yeah. That's a thesis project if he's ever seen one.

Every time he sees the portrait during research sessions, he swears the veil gets longer. Or shorter. Or floatier. It moves a lot despite there being no draft in its little nook. Nobody else he's asked seems to be able to track the veil's changes, or even notice, but Landon doesn't really mind. When it hits the floor, he can sneak an extra sample for chemical analysis, and nobody knows... so it's fine. It's not haunted, probably, and hey, he gets to do the research and write the plaque and cut the ribbon when the exhibit opens! That's cool!

And then one day: he's doing some followup research during a normal museum day, holding impromptu discussions with everyone who stops in for a look and jotting down any comments about the veil. Mostly, he's just explaining how nobody knows how the veil is attached, or who painted it - until there's a girl in a band tee who comes by three days in a row, and every time, she takes a little longer with it than the other visitors. She's got a head of seafoam-shaded braids and a question on the third day that makes Landon's heart just about stop:

"What's up with the veil? It was touching the floor yesterday, and the day before, but now it's barely past the frame."

They get to talking. Landon lets her in on a secret: nobody else has ever asked. No, never! Maybe nobody else has ever noticed. Why her? Does she remember things nobody else seems to be able to see, he jokes?

Turns out: she does. And, apparently, so do a handful of others, and this girl is friends with all of them.

It's Wednesday night, and the museum closes at seven. After a breathless half-an-hour speed walk to the artsy district downtown, Landon steps into the CrossRoast, and for the first time, he realizes... it's not just him who remembers things nobody else can see.

And it never, ever has been.

(And, uh... Yeah. I've been meaning to make that link official for a while now. I had more to say about Landon, I think, but I really wanted that backstory out more than anything. If I remember my other points, I'll make them.So, until I get to updating Cortado again: take this instead of a proper chapter. Hope you had fun! I sure did!)

[shihalyfie]

This is potentially a very loaded question so feel free to not answer if you don't feel like it, but how do you as a woman feel about the handling of female characters in Digimon (anime of course, but also games, manga and even the Digimon themselves)? I've seen takes of all kinds from women over the years so I'm curious how you feel. But again, no pressure to answer if you feel uncomfortable with the subject or too daunted by all the material on the table.

Oh man, I don't mind talking about the subject in itself, but what makes it hard for me is just that the Digimon franchise just has so many things at once with so many different writers and different writing philosophies that I can't really treat the entire thing like a monolith. Especially when you have things running the spectrum from Cyber Sleuth (where female characters arguably drive the narrative far more than the male characters) to Next (which has gotten me angrily ranting about the absolutely awful way it treats its girls, a rant which I would prefer to not subject my followers to).

So before I go ahead, I do want to make sure anyone reading this understands that I'm just talking about my own personal experience and feelings regarding the situation, and I'm very sure that other people will feel differently. I definitely don't feel qualified to comment on what's the ideal way to write female charaters in media or whatever (as if there's even one right answer to that!); I can only truly comment on myself and my own stances on it. (And of course, the OP graciously asked specifically about that, but I just want to make sure nobody reading this post misunderstands!)

Well, I will say that if there's one thing that does seem to be consistent (and I say consistent, because Next absolutely violates this one and Frontier does kind of dangerously toe the line), it's that I haven't really seen Digimon fall victim to the problem of what I call making its female characters the Designated Girl Characters™. Explaining what that is is kind of tricky, but a lot of shounen series will have this very strong "consciousness" of its female characters like they're there to fill a quota, and thus treat them in a way that's kind of alienating. Or in other words, "they section off this character very weirdly in a way they would never do for the male characters." (Note that while Ruki's character arc is made with strong consciousness of her being a girl, the whole point is about condemning the idea she should be treated like some novelty just because she's a girl, so I don't count it as this.)

It was really refreshing to see a 1999 anime portray the girls as mingling with the boys like it was no big deal, and I do wonder if Adventure setting this precedent is a big reason later series have followed in this regard. Adventure through Frontier were made with heavy female creator influence, something that the fandom really tends to downplay (especially because a lot of people suspiciously avoid acknowledging their importance, like how everyone will talk about Hosoda but nobody will talk about the fact Yoshida Reiko wrote the scripts for everything he did, or how people virtually ignored Seki's existence compared to Kakudou until very recently). I think a lot of that shows in its writing; of course, that's not to say there aren't things that really could have used improvement (I think Izumi's treatment in Frontier is the one pretty much everyone universally agrees really left much to be desired, and Tomita even outright admitted he's not very good at writing girls, although that frankly kind of surprises me given how much of his other work has involved writing girls really well), but at the very least it does show a bit more conscientiousness about its female characters than you would see in other shows where female creators were either nonexistent or clearly had no influence in the staff room.

On the flip side, there's also things that were more tasteful in execution than may have even been intended; Sora's character arc isn't that much about her femininity in practice, and Juri does come off as better than your average damsel in distress character, but that doesn't change the fact that the nuance is still there (and that in the latter case a certain writer has outright indulged in that), so all I can do is just be grateful that it didn't get worse.

I guess in the end, my stance is "give or take". I like a lot of other kids' shows (including shounen) that have been better or worse than Digimon's average level, and Digimon itself is so varied that I think it just kind of mingles in there. There are things I like, things I don't like, but at the very least there haven't been too many things that crossed my personal boundary of "absolutely not" (there are, there just aren't many). I think Adventure and 02 in particular are often accused of being more malicious towards its female characters and "screwing them over" than they were intended to be, since a lot of it seems to be a combination of wanting to portray its characters a little too realistically and simply just accidental bad circumstances of how it presented (the fact Hikari's two most famous episodes are by two non-regulars on the series who seemed to be huge fans of portraying her with a brother complex really did not help here), and things like "the same things that feel personally relatable to me are also things that read badly to others, so I understand why people don't like it but I also feel kind of weird when they imply that this kind of concept is inherently Bad" (a lot of things related to Sora and Miyako fall into this category for me). And I mean, part of the reason Miyako became my central character back when I wrote fanfic more often was that I just found her to be an incredibly complex character for the kind you'd usually see in shounen works; I honestly don't know of many other things that would portray someone like her sympathetically instead of cramming her into a "hysterical woman" trope box.

There's also the fact that there's a lot more adult-oriented Digimon media coming up nowadays, so there's that awkward situation where "female character representation" starts having a blurred boundary with "waifu character". Which is not to say that I mind the idea of male fans also liking the female characters I like, but more so that when you get into this territory, I start getting conscious about whether the female characters are more obviously being written in a way to "please the male fans and make them into fanservice material" than it respects them as characters. And I mean, I say it's a blurred boundary for good reason; the aforementioned Cyber Sleuth characters do kind of have that (especially in their character designs), but they are actually written as good characters with agency, whereas you have things like the Adventure girls in tri. who are ostensibly written to follow up on their Adventure character arcs but came off to me as being uncomfortably shoved into the Waifu Character Fanservice troping boxes, especially Mimi and Hikari. (Hooters outfit Mimi and brother complex Hikari are among the few things that I would say have crossed a serious line with me.) So again...give or take.

I will say that the American English dub had a somewhat more misogynistic nuance in the way it treated Mimi, Miyako, and Hikari (it had a lot more condescending tone in the way it portrayed Mimi's airheadedness/materialism and Yolei's penchant for fangirling while also expecting Kari to just put up with Davis harassing her, and it exacerbated the already-kind-of-uncomfortable feelings I had about the unsympathetic way Sora is portrayed in Our War Game!), but it's not to the extent I felt it derailed the entire narrative.

As for the Digimon themselves, the feminine Digimon design sexualization didn't bother me much when I was younger (I remember I really wasn't bothered by Angewomon's design at all), but it does bother me a little more now, especially since you have more designs like Venusmon these days (really? really?). But then there are also really good designs like LovelyAngemon and Mastemon that are just plain cool! And then even designs aside, there's a difference in the way each work portrays them; for instance, you can tell certain anime had more fun with the chest jiggles on the same Digimon that other series were not weird about at all. Maybe the fact Adventure and 02 weren't really weird about Angewomon's design was exactly why I didn't notice it very much back then?

Well, that got long and very rambling, but I hope that answered your question to some extent!

[luckystarchild]

Sometimes I get a little... frustrated... by the reactions to Lucky Child.

(No one is doing anything wrong. This isn't a callout post.)

Fiction that is serialized one chapter/installment at a time over a long period of time suffers from "No Instant Answers Disease." In a book, if you have a question about something that occurs midway through the narrative, you can read to the end and (most of the time) get your answer unless the author forgets the plot thread or something. But with serial fiction that is incomplete, you can't keep reading. You just have to sit with whatever the plot point is, wondering.

Sometimes LC (and most ongoing work probably) gets comments that express frustration over something that I, the author, know will get resolved eventually. But on a few specific topics, folk consistently will write comments that accidentally imply I'm like... writing about pointless stuff?? And I KNOW they don't mean to imply that, and that they're just giving an emotional response to the drama I MYSELF CREATED, which means it's impacting them emotionally and that means my writing of the subject was successful, BUT it's still a little frustrating on my part when people seem to imply that I'm wasting time/words/story on something "useless" or "pointless" or something that "doesn't matter." FRUSTRATING that they think I'm just wasting words!

But it's not frustrating in a "they're wrong" kind of way, mind you. It's frustrating in a "I can't give them any assurances without dropping massive spoilers and now I'm caught between a rock and a spoilery place" kind of way!

Big LC spoilers if you haven't read past chapter 110 or so. Click to keep reading.

Specifically I'm talking about the "None of this is real" plotline. For those who need a refresher, Hiruko implied that the world/people around NQK may not be "Real" by some obscure definition, and NQK spends a lot of time agonizing over what that means in both a practical and philosophical sense, and if it means anything at all.

In chapter 109, NQKagome reacts super emotionally to this whole idea, insisting that the people around her MUST be real. She loves them, and she feels they love her, so the idea that they're "philosophical zombies" that are basically just really good fake people makes her have an anxiety attack. And a lot of readers SWIFTLY sided with NQKagome, and/or they argued "It doesn't actually matter if they're real or not."

It's that last argument I find really frustrating. The implication that "this topic they're spending time on doesn't matter and they shouldn't even worry about it" is, unintentionally, kind of implying that the time we're spending talking about the concept itself doesn't matter, which is in turn an implication that it has no bearing on the plot/story/characters, which is kind of a sideways comment about my writing/storycraft itself. It's implying I'm spinning my wheels on useless crap.

And I know that's not what's intended by those comments, which are instead likely just emotional reactions to a heavy concept, but like... "Hey author, this thing you've devoted thousands of words to doesn't actually matter or have a point, I think it's useless for the characters to care about it" is a frustrating thing to hear.

Because it does matter.

I wouldn't be writing about it at such length and in such detail if it didn't matter.

But I can't like... explain why it matters, or even the DEGREE to which it does or doesn't matters, because even hinting at how big (or small) of a deal it may be could be SUPER spoilery if you're even a LITTLE good at deducing metanarrative. So I just have to sit here nervously laughing to myself going, "Heheh, yeah, uh, it toooootally doesn't matter at all, noooo... (*nervous fidgeting*)" and feeling frustrated that the reader doesn't trust me to write about things that "matter."

Oh god, this is a trust issue. I just figured that out now while writing this.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that if LC were complete, you could just read to the end and figure out why/how it matters instead of implying it's a useless waste of time, but LC isn't complete, so...you can't. BUT I also know that the impassioned responses to the "Is this Real?" question show just how deeply the topic gets under people's skin, and that's great for me as a writer, because it shows me where I can focus to get people emotionally invested. Even the most hostile "this sucks and this topic shouldn't matter" responses show me I've struck a nerve, which is a GOOD thing in the end. I should take those comments as compliments.

But all in all, I GUESS those frustrating responses and my reactions to them indicate how much I need to finish the damn story, so maybe this frustration is a good thing in the end... but please, for the love of fanfic, please TRY and trust that if I spend a long time talking about something in the story, it's probably because I'm laying the groundwork for plot later. Don't fall prey to "No Instant Answers Disease."

"Just trust the process and let me cook." That's the moral (antidote?) here.

And that's my rant. Thanks for reading.

[fishnapple]

Hello! If you're comfortable with answering ANY of these (🌱 🐦‍⬛🥀🍂 🦂 💡) in your Ask Game, I would love to know your unique take! Don't feel obligated to answer them all though. 🙈 I just LOVE and admire the aesthetic, comforting vibe, organization, & advice of your overall blog! 🥰

Hi, how you're doing?

Thank you for your message 🥰

Feel free to share your thoughts on these questions too 🐋

🌱 How do you prepare yourself before a reading?

I usually do a reading right after I wake up from sleep. It's when I'm feel the most refreshed. Before and after each reading, I drink a large gulp of water, stretch myself, move around, look out the window to relax my eyes and spaced out to empty my mind lol. In short, I make myself feel physically comfortable and active enough.

Basically this:

🐦‍⬛How do you handle challenging or negative readings?

Like how I handle a challenging or negative person, I guess? I listen and try not to judge.

One kind of challenge in a reading is when I don't feel or get anything. I feel stuck and empty. The thing is, when I actually voice it out or write it down, the fog will get clearer, like a shift in perspective. If it's still difficult to read, I will leave the reading for a while and come back later. Like when your friend is sulking and silent, you give them space and time.

🥀Have you ever experienced tarot or spiritual burnout, and how did you overcome it?

I have a period of 6 or 7 years of Tarot burnout. I barely touched it. But as my spiritual beliefs evolved and changed, I came back to Tarot and found a new inspiration and purpose for it. Nowadays, I mostly use Tarot to ask questions about the general mysteries of life instead of external, practical situations in my life. I just find Tarot works better that way for me.

I believe that burnout of any kind is a sign that shows constriction (a definition of the word constrict: make narrower, especially by encircling pressure). So the action to relieve that feeling of constriction is to widen, to expand, be it your world view, your knowledge, your interests etc.

💡 How do you come up with pick a card readings ideas?

I make a checklist of steps in a journey, each PAC topic is a step in that checklist 📋. Ideally, that's how I wanted to do it. But I'm impulsive so if I come across some interesting topics that I want to do right away, I will do the reading first and then try to slot it in the checklist. Like a series, each episode contributes to the overall plot but there will be some filler episodes.

🦂 How do you handle skepticism from others about your tarot practice?

I don't mention the subject to them anymore 😗. If the scepticism is about my ability, when I feel energetic and persuasive, I will tell them some of the predictions that have come true. I invite them to try for themselves or accept the fact that we are not for each other.

Oddly enough, I haven't really encountered much scepticism or criticism about my occult practice. People's reactions range from surprised, mildly amused, enthusiastic to becoming converted. Pretty encouraging, actually. I even read Tarot for my boss at work lol.

But I do notice some people want to practise Tarot but their environment and community aren't exactly supportive. It's difficult to try to convince or argue in this kind of situation so keeping it a secret is a way to protect it. I hope that they continue to do what they love and will find a supportive community for them.

🍂 What do you wish to see more, and less of, in the tarot sphere?

I want to see less drama in the community. Everyone has a story behind. It's interesting to hear people's different points of view but when it turns into criticism or judgement, it feels suffocating.

I do wish to see more observation posts about Tarot tho, like those of astrology observations. I think that would be a great opportunity to learn and discuss.

I hope you are always well rested and full of energy 🌌

🪷

Get to know your Tarot readet - ask game

[madqueenalanna]

i just read sharp objects and i want to talk about it but like where to even START

in the back of my mind i am percolating a comparison between gillian flynn and vc andrews, which might not make sense to anyone but me. the generational trauma, the behind-closed-doors horror, the power in sexuality. vc andrews wrote about the unique, indescribable rage experienced by teenage girls exploring their bodies and sexuality in a deeply patriarchal society; gillian flynn writes about women in their 30s, those abused and angry girls all grown up and dangerous. both an exploration of a facet of women's inner lives that feels very difficult to explain and which is rarely explored in other media

anyway wow the generational trauma. joya abused adora, who became a teen mother and abused all three of her daughters. when amma was born, camille was about the same age that adora was when camille was born, and there's this weird sister-child-friend-enemy dynamic camille has with amma. none of them ever learned how to love each other, or themselves. camille turned her anger inward and destroyed her body; adora poisoned marian her whole life and finally killed her; amma mutilated the bodies of her classmates for her dollhouse. what the fuck is even going ON with these people

i still need to read dark places but between gone girl and sharp objects, i am fascinated by gillian flynn's take on these adult women's sexuality. amy does not seem to enjoy sex much at all except for the power it gives her over men; she thinks derisively about nick's desire, desi's, the appeal of girls like andie; she (and camille) talks about sex in kind of a clinical, detached way, the smell, the stickiness, this very open and raw but entirely un-sexy way. camille blames herself for being gang-raped at fourteen while drunk, but locks her various traumas so deep that even thinking about the event sounds like she's talking about someone else (and to willis, she is). sex is power and control, it's about using other people by letting them use you. it's gross. it's intimate. as someone with some... issues around sex, myself, i could see why it would rub people the wrong way but i found it oddly refreshing, in the way i find gallows humor to be funny

gillian flynn said in an ama that she wrote sharp objects as an exploration of female generational violence, a subject considerably less explored than male cyclical violence (no one is writing the all-woman atreus house, for example). her protagonists are ruthless, crass, secretive, kind of cold, unflinching in the face of monstrosity. amy notices that nick's hands still smell like andie after a hookup and thinks "she must have one rank pussy"; camille carves the word "clit" on herself and only later changes it to "cAt". vulnerability might exist for them, but it's buried so far down that even first-person narration can barely touch it

i feel like it's rare to see female protagonists like these that aren't given much justification or redemption and that aren't... i don't know, given masculine traits? like how in movies, women only know about cars bc they have five brothers, and they prove they're "cool" by having lots of sex, drinking heavily, always being "game" i mean god i'm so sick of it all. run cool_girl_monologue.exe. the violence that women do to each other and themselves can be horrific on its own. i don't think you could gender-swap these stories and change nothing else, they're about WOMEN

anyway gone girl was already one of my favorite books and sharp objects was unreal good, i need to watch the miniseries and read dark places

[thankskenpenders]

And now for something new

So, here's something I was never planning on doing, but I just couldn't shake the idea... Thanks Ken Penders is gaining a sister blog featuring an entirely different comic franchise!

Introducing... Thanks Steve Ditko, a blog where I read the Earth-616 Spider-Man comics, starting all the way back in the '60s! It's gonna be much more casual and less thorough than how I run things here on TKP, though, which I'll explain in a sec.

If seeing me post weird bits from old Spider-Man comics sounds fun and you need no further info, then just head right on over to Thanks Steve Ditko. But for longtime TKP readers, I know you probably have questions...

Number one: Why?

Spider-Man's always been my favorite superhero, and with the Spider-Verse movies kicking ass and my excitement building for the new Insomniac game, I've been in a Spidey mood. Inevitably, a thought occurred to me: Maybe I should actually read the comics that everything else is built off of and see the wildly varying contributions of all the original creators, rather than filtering them through big budget adaptations. If I can power through One Piece and all these other manga with hundreds of chapters, it can't be that hard... right?

And, well, after a few issues I quickly realized that my options were to either clog up my other accounts with random Spider-Man panels for years, or to just make a side blog. And so the side blog was born.

Two: Will this blog replace Thanks Ken Penders?

NO!!!!!!!!!

Okay but prove it

To allow the two to exist side-by-side, Thanks Steve Ditko will have a different format than what Thanks Ken Penders developed. Rather than an in-depth guided tour that critically analyzes every story beat of every issue, TSD will just be a place for amusing panels and brief thoughts as I casually read the comics at my own pace.

If you've seen me make a few tweets about reading Spider-Man recently, I'm basically just moving that to a dedicated Tumblr. It's a place for me to dump these things so that it doesn't fill up my media tab on Twitter for the next decade. (You know, assuming Twitter is still around in a decade.) There will be many issues where I only post two panels that I thought were funny. There will be issues where I don't have anything to say at all. Maybe I'll reach a run that I just cannot get into, and I start skipping around more. Who knows!

This may sound similar to what I thought this blog would be before it blew up. Aside from the simple fact that there's already mountains of Spider-Man commentary out there and therefore less of a void for me to fill, one of the main steps I'll be taking to avoid repeating the past is not enabling an ask box on TSD. I do not need people to ask me to go into ten times more detail on everything. I do not need to write seven essay-length responses to questions about Spider-Man minutiae every day. I do not need a place for people to chide me for not covering certain scenes, issues, or ancillary series.

It also won't have any kind of update schedule. I'm trying to keep it very casual. I'm reading these comics at my own pace, and if I feel like sharing a moment or commenting on something while doing so? It goes there. That's it.

(On the subject of format changes, I'm also listing the issue, writer, and penciller in the body of every post. This is a thing I wish I'd done on TKP so that people didn't misattribute every weird Archie Sonic panel I post to Penders.)

Three: So when will TKP come back from hiatus? You said it'd come back after you finished SLARPG!

I don't know! Sorry. I have a couple things on the backburner right now for TKP, but I'm not sure when I'll get back to proper updates where I read more comics.

I wanted to bring TKP back this year, and that's still possible. The main hurdle is that I want to reread my own archive (again) as a refresher, which is, uh. A lot of posts. I've developed a high standard for myself on here, and I feel like I wouldn't be doing my job right if I forgot half the ongoing subplots and character arcs and didn't bring them up in my analysis. Especially when I'm discussing the work of an author as obsessed with continuity as Ian Flynn. Unfortunately, the nature of this blog means that every time I go on another long hiatus for Life Reasons I have even more comic continuity to catch up on than last time.

(This is a big part of why I'm making Thanks Steve Ditko an extremely casual blog instead of promising to become a Lore Expert on 60+ years of Marvel.)

Mostly I've just been very burnt out this year after having finally finished a video game that took almost eight years to make. I haven't really had the energy for any creative projects, including TKP. But I feel a little bit of a spark here with Spider-Man, so I'm chasing that feeling to try to get back into the swing of blogging about comics - no pun intended.

So, basically, bear with me on this as I start this low-energy side project. But hopefully folks will enjoy Thanks Steve Ditko as its own thing, too.

Look forward to goofy shit like this

[lincolndjarin]

what i've been up to and what's coming up:

ok ok ok so my break is actually over now.

i'm back in the full swing of things, and have been working towards very seriously writing my novel. but my break ran a little long so here's a small little updated list of my fic plans:

oh honey's final chapter will be posted soon, that's where my priorities are but i need to reread the last chapter to refresh my memory since it's been a while

i have a husbannd!joel x reader one shot in the works

i plan to go back through bks and do a full edit now that it's done

i have the two series that i have teased for january (most likely first week of february for those, apologies)

and i started working on that short horror anthology with pedro characters a while back so that will also be out soon

i'm certain there will be more but for now thats the plan, in this new year i'm hoping to do weekly updates, alternating between the two fics i have planned but that's subject to change.

in less interesting news here's what i've been doing in my time away:

to be completely honest it's been a whole lot of nothing. i buried myself in writing from the day i started bks until it ended. all my free time was devoted to writing and i never really took a second to step back from that. and i wouldn't change a thing, i absolutely adore writing and i'm extremely proud of what i wrote but i didn't make time for anything else in those months.

i did end up writing on several occasions, whenever i had an idea i was worried about losing i would take a day to write it out but that was it.

i was in a little slump for a while and eventually realized i've just needed some sort of creative outlet besides my writing, that outlet used to be dnd. but all my friends i used to play with are now spread out across the state so that isn't really an option anymore.

so i got my dosage upped and starting playing baulders gate and i gotta be honest, it worked lmaooooo

i'm doing a lot better, i feel better, i'm excited to start writing again because i love doing it. so thank y'all so much, and i can't wait to keep making things. <3

[remedyxtragedy]

Hello!!! Pleasure to meet ya!!

I only really wanna go by RemedyxTragedy but you can also just call me Rem or Remedy, whichever you prefer. I've been posting on tumblr for a good few months now on my other two accounts, however I've yet to emulate the online identity I've always wanted on platforms like this and so I decided, why not start anew and see where I get?

What I really strive to accomplish here is sharing my work with the masses, in a way that's 100% better and more organized than my previous attempts. Before I continue on about my stories, however, some basic and completely relevant facts about me are--

I prefer a much darker and grim style of writing so fluff, heartbalm, and mushy light-hearted stuff isn't really my cup of tea, although I do like wholesome from time to time just as a refresher from the more serious themes and subjects I often entrench myself in, to an unhealthy extent, so if I'm in the mood for it I might post such a story or two

I'm still very much in high school, but writing has been my passion for many years now. I enjoy playwriting and the regular creative style of writing, but as I've stated before my work will most likely only ever consist of Horror, mystery, or Thriller--it's what I'm best at.

Yes, I make art. I'm a rookie, by all means, but it's a very precious hobby of mine and so I make the most of it. My main blog is where I post art showcasing my main art style which is pretty vibrant and colorful so if you're interested you can check that out, but on this blog I'll only be posting art using the particular art style I adopted for Idiosyncratic, my other big story (name to be decided), and any other story I come up with along the journey. You'll see what I mean

I have a kitty cat, Tsukiko, and she's my pride and joy. Probably the most unnecessary detail I've shared about myself but in my eyes this is absolutely vital information the world should know about

I'm a Christian through and through, though I'm quite interested in a variety of religious and philosophical concepts which I incorporate in my writing, including of course heaven and hell, morality based on what is religiously acceptable compared to moral relativism, solipsism, theodicy, eternal recurrence, and many, many more.

I've been working on Idiosyncratic since seventh grade, technically six, so what I have now is the result of more than three years worth of heavy revision, redrafting, and complete reworking of my original idea. And let me tell you, what I had before is like the ugly grandfather of my current version of Idiosyncratic and if you were to place the two together side by side, you'd have no idea that they're related. The juxtaposition would be jaw-dropping, but ultimately all of this is to say that Idiosyncratic is very important to me and I pray that the final product, whatever it becomes, gets me somewhere in this world

Now, derailing from the mini tangent and while we're on the topic of Idiosyncratic, I'll give you all a pretty detailed summary of my idea and I'll make another separate post about my other big story that I recently started working on since this introduction post is already long enough. So, without further ado--

Idiosyncratic follows the twisted tragedy of Calixte Stanhope, a rather callous and apathetic but…ordinary enough young man who awoke in a truly bizarre dystopian world after being pushed in front of an ongoing train while escorting his significant other home, a faceless and nameless woman he remembers only by her mere existence in this vivid memory. Throughout his journey he's haunted and tormented by an ever-worsening deep longing for her that seems to spur his unnatural incentive to do whatever he must to survive.

Rather than being welcomed by the pearly gates of heaven or the fiery pits of hell, Calixte found himself standing in the midst of the deceptively benevolent town of Baltimore, where everything from the largest bank to the tiniest coin is made entirely of cardboard and plastic, like the set for a play—mimicking the real thing while not actually being it. One can say, a rip off of everything in our world, and yet it functions all the same, strangely enough.

The citizens of the town too; although they're quick to greet you with a warm smile and talk with such an enticing charm that is sure to ensnare anybody desperate for answers to their odd predicament, they are not even close to being as ordinary as first impressions suggest--first impressions of which Calixte, for whatever reason, could see straight through. And soon enough, those illusions of a Utopian society vanish into cinder as the true reality of the young man's situation is unveiled to be more abstract and dreadful than he even considered feasible. A reality that threatens to permanently twist and pervert the very perceptions of right and wrong our civilizations were forged upon.

What'll ultimately become abundantly clear to Calixte is that this world to glorifies the degeneracy we spurn, endorses the activity we condemn, and corrupts the principles we have used to scaffold our lands from the ground up--essentially, a complete burlesque or anti-thesis of what we stand for that is fueled by entropy. Violence and madness is praised and empowered, old concepts of morality are muddled and deemed obsolete, and humanity's animalistic drive to persevere at all costs is just a catalyst for a higher man's twisted wonderland. The citizens of this delightful world are diehard fanatics for this way of living, lusting for violence so much to the point where its broadcasted on television, discussed fanatically in literature, and displayed publicly as theatrical performances. The more irredeemable and atrocious something is, the more the residents of Baltimore revere it like sacred scripture, and the man who proudly encourages and orchestrates this madness, the aforementioned 'higher man', is none other than the eccentric mayor, “Whitman Sedgwick"--which is his pen name, as he usually regulates his hegemony and maintains a formidable presence through various propaganda, manifestos, and biographies that can be found all around town--the most famous of which being his disturbing pro-anarchy book, 'All Good Things'.

The very unlucky menagerie of people who wound up in Baltimore under bizarre circumstances similar to Calixte’s, properly labeled as “actors”, have to routinely partake in abhorrent acts for the public’s entertainment otherwise more than just their dignity, humanity, and pride will be torn from them. And eventually, once you're fully proven yourself to be of no use to Whitman's design, you are properly "dealt with"...

It’s a horrifying ordeal to most, but a paradise to some of humanity’s greatest degenerates, and that minority is powerful, hungry, and determined to survive by any means necessary--no matter how low they must stoop, or how much of their pith they must forsake in order to prevail. Thus leading Calixte, a not-so-righteous man with an ambition, to meet some other morally questionable people he never would’ve otherwise, creating a fragile alliance that will either make or break this band of reprehensible lowlives, all depraved in their own ways but alike in their desire for freedom and above all, answers.

As he begrudgingly adjusts his mind to this new world, he quickly realizes his dangerous willingness to do anything and everything he must in order to discover and accomplish his true purpose, and of course, to reunite with the one woman so dear to him. As his journey of metaphorical self destruction embarks, Calixte molds himself a vessel most apt to not only survive in Baltimore but to succeed beyond expectations, seemingly becoming a version of himself that'll soon be unrecognizable from its original form. In spite of his sturdy mind, as he comes to realize, there was absolutely nothing he could've done to brace himself for the scary revelation that the utter absurdity of this world may extend far, far beyond just the glamorization and capitalization of moral debasement. It seems, there's a larger horror waiting to be unearthed just beyond what his lenses can capture. It seems, there's more than one person pulling at the strings--its just a question of, who exactly is at the end of the cross brace?

OOOOoooh so ominous

Also, PLEASE, give me feedback.

[totaldramafan-lauri]

I want to rant on how gorgeous and beautiful Golden cheese is in your story..

Like she is so benovelent and gentle to anyone even outsider, like she freed reader from prison multiple times and have listen to the reader voice on what's the problem. I bet that's why reader have fallen in love with her so quickly, well so do I if I'm in that situation where i am in a tight situation and Golden cheese just comforted and helped me.. I would be down bad too!..

I'm sad that such character is not real, I know I'm crazy for saying this and just seeing her, loving her... it's weird for everyone if you love a fictional cookie but yk? When you fall in love with something.. you can never let go, I started the crk game just for her, to pull for her..

I like how sassy and passionate she gets in-game, even calling herself a god. how cute though, wish I can talk to her like the reader.. maybe I'm going to deep Inlove with this..

Im deep down delusional and not even resisting because of how I admire golden cheese cookie.. she is beautiful and gorgeous on fanarts on Twitter. I only use Twitter to just search for Golden cheese fanarts and add it to my galary..

Some people would act like this too, even worse then me to be honest.. I really like and love Golden cheese and to top it with your work is a cherry on top.. I still play the game because of Golden cheese despite all of the bad updates.. Its really refreshing that there is someone who love her the way I do too, I bet you love her more then I do because you write a whole long story just for her.. I appreciate that.

I'm a little embarrass to say all this and yap about golden cheese like no tomorrow :D.. I really admire a character that is well written and such, I can't wait for Golden cheese beastyeast update and her awaken Costume to appear. I would be spend all my time grinding if I can just get that costume or something like that..

To be honest, I really like how you write her down, make her say something that fits what her character is like... It's a bit sad that' it's going to end.. so uhm Thanks for reading and even considering to read this.. I really like your work! Keep going and don't quit please ^^)..

I-I......hhhhhh.....Th-thanks.....I-I'm really, really happy that the way I write her pleases someone who is s-such a big fan of her......! >//////<

I-I wish I could freely vent in depth about all the things I love about her, but....wh-whenever I try to, I just find myself at a loss of words.....a-and I get so e-embarrassed...M-my biggest Tumblr friends don't know about CRK, cuz I got into it through Discord, so I find it hard to open up about it here....e-especially her.....S-so...you're doing what I can't.......X///////D

A-all I can really say, is just....e-everything about her, j-just....everything....everything....appearance, voice, personality, relationship with her subjects, everything...I-If I was less shy, there's be a big big list of things about her that appeal to my tastes.....B-but the thing that FIRST made me realize I was falling hard on the first day was something actually pretty simple, and it was just her overall demeanor....and her dialogue, just....the way she carries herself. How in control she seemed to be....the amount of respect she commands when she speaks, to the point where I felt humbled in her presence....Sh-she's just flipping majestic and I dunno how else to put it in words, there's just something special about her, which makes her SOOOOO different than other god complex characters who don't have anything to back them up, pffff....

*cough* U-uh....th-that's to say......uh, you'renotalone...! U-uh, I didn't start playing for her - I've been playing since 2021 - b-but.....b-being obsessed with her....? Y-yeah,Icompletelyunderstandanddon'tworry,she'dLOVElearningaboutthatso-ahahahaha......e-everything'sfine.....x//////x

A-as for how I write her, I wouldn't say she's gentle to ANY outsider, pffff.....benevolent, yes, but let's just say that Reader here has more going for them than they think they do when it comes to drawing out her soft side.....namely, they're vulnerable, loyal and they do as they're told. They're also SO into her that she can't even be irritated at their stumbling, haha...Anyone who DOESN'T listen to her is not being treated gently. She's very patient with her subjects, sure, but OUTSIDERS? Psssshhh, you respect her, or else. X/////D

As a sidenote: I-I dunno what you mean by "despite all the bad updates". CRK's been fine to me. I-I think it's been in a pretty good state, so....yeah.....O.o Grindy games aren't for everyone, tho....Not all the updates have been amazing, but I wouldn't call any of them bad....and I find the current one very addictive (ERROR BUSTERS MY BELOVED), so....I-I kinda disagree with you, I guess.....? B-but yeah, I can't wait for her awakened form.....I dunno how she can become even MORE gorgeous, but they'll find a way somehow, I'm sure....X////D

[unnatural-transformations]

Quantum Groups & Knot Invariants [1 of n]

This is the first installment of what I hope will eventually be a series of posts. I'll be making them over the next few months as I try to improve my understanding of the relationship between knot invariants and the representation theory of quantum groups. In particular, my minimal goal for the year is to learn how to calculate the Jones polynomial of a link via the representation theory of the q-deformed analogue of the universal enveloping algebra of sl_2 (where sl_2 is the Lie algebra of 2 by 2 matrices with zero trace).

While I hope these posts will be of interest to others (and I will try to write them with some sort of general reader in mind), I should admit up front that I'm mostly writing them for myself. I know (or used to know) a bit about both knot invariants and quantum groups separately, but it's been a while since I looked at either subject and I never really knew much about how they were connected. I'm challenging myself to try to improve on that state of affairs: first by refreshing my old knowledge and then by moving on to something new [or at least, new to me: I'm not doing anything original here].

My idea is that I'm more likely to achieve this goal if I have at least a notional audience to keep me honest about my progress. Hence, this blog and this series of posts.

(I'm also using this as an excuse to try to teach myself to make better use of LaTeX packages like TikZ and xypic. Since Tumblr really doesn't have any good way of rendering mathematics, you should expect to see a lot of embedded images in the posts in this series.)

The next few posts in this series will be my attempts to summarize the key ideas at work as best as I can. These are mostly ideas I'm already fairly familiar with (or at least, ideas I should be familiar with), so I hope this stage won't take more than a few weeks. The limiting factor might just be how much time I have to write things up properly.

Knots and links; their diagrams and the idea of knot invariants

The Jones polynomial via Kauffman's bracket polynomial

Braids, Hecke algebras of type A and the Temperley-Lieb algebra

[+ the Jones polynomial via a trace on the Temperley-Lieb algebra]

[+ monoidal categories; examples and basic properties]

Braided monoidal categories

Motivating bialgebras and Hopf algebras

Representations of some particular quantum groups

Universal R-matrices and quasitriangular Hopf algebras

Schur-Weyl duality (both classical and quantum)

I won't necessarily be posting about these topics in this order, but this order is at least as likely as any other. [Edit: any additions to the list will be indicated in square brackets like this, and prefaced with a + symbol.]

I'll update the list above as I finish writing the posts (both to add links and perhaps to slightly revise the list itself with new or different topics).

After that, what I post about next will depend on where my reading takes me and how much progress I manage to make. At a minimum, I'll try to post a quick summary of whatever I'm currently reading every couple of weeks.

[leggyre]

You got any adivce for someone who's considering dropping drawing completely since they don't like what they're making at all?

honestly i've been in the same struggle recently bc it just hasn't been a good year for me. i haven't been drawing a lot bc most of the time i'm either sick or i just.. can't. I've been picking myself up as of late and it's a really difficult grind, but honestly the fact i've been able to actually start this grind is already good for now. I guess that counts as advice; be patient with yourself. Self-esteem doesn't come easy and the little steps are worth so much more than you think.

ok so uh,

-if you just started, don't think about it too much. we all start with the weird scribbles. if you stop now you might never get back to it -if you've been trying to doodle often and always end up hating the result, just take a break. art block is seasoning for burnout and you might just be tired. a lot of times i've felt bad about my art i kinda "gave up" for a while and when i came back to it it was like "wtf this easy what was my issue (it was burnout)". so take a break, play some videogames or hang out with your friends for a week. idk write essays about the media you like? it feels like you're being unproductive but resting IS part of productive because just pushing yourself will just result in nothing being done at the end of the day. -look at your favorite work! im not quite out of my latest artblock yet because its a tough one(it's been teaming up with depression caused by health problems it suuuuucks :/), but when i went long enough without being able to draw I kinda started feeling like I can't do shit and can't call myself an illustrator at all specially bc what i do isnt that big of a deal compared to others(<- comparison also big mistake remember youre the only one who can make YOUR art), going through my folders and seeing the stuff I like the most gave me a LOT of motivation to keep going, even if I was still unable to start drawing right away. not giving up is so important. -so yeah love your art. focus on drawing things you like because it's a gift from you to you, and you should treat it as such. i know it's really hard to be positive about it all the time but it can be really good to go through all your artwork at the end of a day and look at the things you like about it, even if it isn't much. -on that note, find something you really like drawing!!! back in high school i had massive periods of depression that kept me from drawing but i occasionally found sort of a 'life hack' for myself which were things i was always able to work with even during the worst times. one of them was just.. bees. i just doodled random characters as these bees and made og designs too and it was fun. the other one was using colored pencils instead of a regular one bc i just like colors and it made me happy :] it didnt matter that they always had the same overall shape or if i couldnt erase when i messed up, i was just feeling good being able to draw something that i liked. -experiment more!! expand your palettes and download some new brushes. i even change from my newest to my old busted tablet that still sorta works occasionally because using a tool that feels different is.. refreshing somehow? idk -when you need to get yourself back up, do the little steps at your own pace. do a little doodle every day. it's okay if it's always the same thing. the same character. the exact same idea. it's okay if it sucks or if it's unfinished because you struggled. Just give it little pushes. What matters is to try. and it's okay if you can't do it every day. maybe every other day if you need a slower pace. -and remember. engagement doesn't measure your skill. art is subjective anyways!!!!! i spent YEARS doodling and posting only my ocs and getting little to no notes. i think one of my favorite artworks from the time i had ~100 followers had like 0 notes for the longest time. to be honest i don't even know if it has any likes at all nowadays i'd have to look it up bc it's a bit buried