#i'm going to crack up

[egophiliac]

crossing my fingers and wishing upon every star that chapter 10 finally brings us the tweel cards 🤞🤞

[flawlessflesh]

this was truly our dungeon meshi

[madegeeky]

(Read the pics left to right, starting at the bottom of the pic and reading up.)

Y'all, this package I'm supposed to get has decided to go on multiple vacations without me.

I live near Chicago but not in Palatine, so it has never even made it to my city. XD

[wearecrowley]

good omens crack 2 of ∞

[ruporas]

drank too much

[ID: Digital Art of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. Vash’s body is turned slightly away from the viewer as he holds a staggering Wolfwood by his shoulder. He has one foot ahead of the other, the foot in the back used to stabilize himself from tipping over. Wolfwood is tethering into Vash, his weight pressed into him with his arms wrapped around Vash’s waist and his face is hidden away as he leans against Vash’s shoulder. Vash’s expression can be seen, his eyes wide and mouth tight-lipped, and his face is flushed red. A speech bubble comes out from Wolfwood, saying a drawled “Spikeyyy...”. The background are desaturated pastels of blue and green, showing night time, as they stand in the middle of an empty street that is also lit by the moon not depicted. Yellow light is seen coming from the inside of a saloon. End ID]

[adhd-merlin]

[dustykneed]

so jim got bit by a space mushroom that takes away his impulse control... welcome to daycare on the bridge with his xo and cmo

obviously the salad cat meme is still going strong in the 23rd century because these guys reenact it on a daily basis lmaoo

prompt fill for @mcspirkevents' mcspirk bingo prompt "mask off" 🩵💙💛

[thebibliosphere]

Do you think Bruce was weird the first time Tim brought Bernard home? Not because of a man dating a man thing, but because he's just... a nice guy. Some kid. Normal teenager. And given the long list of villains and children of villains his kids have dated over the years, plus super dating is a nightmare. Bruce is like, teary-eyed with awe over a teen who likes video games, accidentally becomes the "need anything, snacks, a condom?" parent out of pure joy because "oh my god this one is NORMAL, Tim, you hang onto him!!"

Bruce being so thrown off his game at meeting Bernard that he temporarily channels June George is giving me so much life.

It'd be so painfully awkward, too, because he'd know. He knows he's not being cool about the situation, but he can't help it.

He's assessing himself against the constant internal perception checks he's always rolling to make sure he's being a Normal Person outside of the cowl, and they're all coming up 1s. He's trying too hard. Too chirpy. Too punny. Too Much. Too Dad.

Bernard doesn't seem to notice. As far as he's aware, it's normal for Bruce to be this cringingly enthusiastic and awkward around his kids' friends. Tim, on the other hand, is conveying clearly that he wants the floor to open up and swallow him whole and that Bruce -- whatever the fuck is wrong with him -- needs to fuck off.

He does not fuck off. He doesn't know how to. All his carefully crafted social schemas have fallen apart. This is Bruce, not knowing how to show approval but trying his hardest.

After several more minutes, Tim saves them all. They were going to play some video game Bernard brought over in the living room, but he takes Bernard by the hand instead and starts leading him up the stairs.

"Come on, we can play it in my room." He glances pointedly at Bruce, who watches them go, still beaming like an idiot. "Somewhere with a door."

"Have fun," Bruce calls after their retreating backs, leaning against the banister as he watches them go. "Let me know if you guys need anything. Snacks. Drinks. A condom. Whatever you want."

Bernard makes a sound like he's choking. The look Tim levels at him is murderous.

This is it. This is Tim's villain origin story. He can see the exact moment they both realize it. Bruce still can't wipe the smile off his face. He does fuck off, though.

[wrongspacetime]

BOTTOMS (2023) | dir. Emma Seligman

[klanced]

when adam met 11yo keith he immediately knew that keith was gay and was like i have GOT to support this kid!! (runs into traffic) meanwhile shiro spent years operating under the assumption that keith had like a gender thing going on

[starrysharks]

hotel manager

[thevoidstaredback]

Phantom's Coffee

Enough Caffeine to Kill an Elephant Side Story

There is a lot that comes with being a ghost. Most of that is really cool superpowers. The unfortunate side effect with the whole being dead thing is that he doesn't have need for human functions or sustenance.

It had been a horrible thing to discover, really. The lack of constant need for sleep and food and drink was sometimes useful, but that came with the realization that nothing affected him.

At first, Danny and his team thought it was because he was dead. No blood flow, no working organs, no metabolism. This lead to a lot of experimentation. Drugs and alcohol had no effect, neither did poisons. He didn't get sick anymore, no matter what he did!

And then he realized that coffee didn't work.

Naturally distraught, Danny went straight to Frostbite to figure out what was going on. It's finals season, damnit! Coffee was gonna be the one thing to pull him through his studies!

"From what I can tell," the yeti explained, "your human functions have stopped. Quite the opposite, really."

Danny blinked. "But, I'm dead. Ghosts don't have working organs or stuff like that."

"Indeed, but you're only half dead."

"What difference does that make?"

Why did Frostbite now have charts, and where did they come from? "I can only guess, but when you died and brought back, the electricity jump started everything in your body. It essentially supercharged you. I can only assume that it'll die down in time to the point of non-function, but we can't know for sure."

"Wait," Danny's voice was nervous, "What does that mean?"

Frostbite took a minute to think over his words, looking for how to phrase what he wanted to say. "When you are alive, your heart beats slower than it did before your death, yes?"

"Yeah."

"That would be the effects of the ectoplasm that reanimated you. Your heart rate is slower, breathing takes a more conscious effort, your blood flow is slower, your organs are all working at half of what they used to." He took another moment of pause. "When you are dead, your heart beats faster than it did, breathing is faster, blood flow is faster, your organs are working at twice capacity."

Danny's breathing, now that he was very aware of it, picked up. "What- But that- What?!"

"With a high enough voltage, electricity kills. With a high enough concentration, ectoplasm reanimates."

"Reani- but I'm alive!"

"Indeed."

"But that doesn't make sense!"

"Doesn't it?"

"No!"

"Perhaps I should try a different phrasing." Frostbite said. "When you are Danny Fenton, you are more dead than alive in the sense that your body has been killed and not fully revived. When you are Danny Phantom, you are more alive than dead in the sense that your body was revived and not fully killed."

Danny was quiet for a moment. "Reanimated and revived aren't interchangeable, Frostbite."

"In some contexts', no. In others, they are."

"Are they here?"

A beat. "Yes."

Danny knew he was lying, but he didn't call him out on it. That was a crisis for another day, thank you very much.

So, higher metabolism for Danny Phantom, lower one for Danny Fenton. Great.

All crises pushed aside to freak out about never later, Danny's ew mission was to find out exactly how much caffeine would be required to give him the buzz of wakefulness that he was searching for.

Normally, the course of action would to be to measure how much e weighs and look up the maximum caffeine intake his body could handle. It was the first thing he tried, and it failed.

By the tried and true method of 'Fuck It, We Ball', Danny learned that he needs to have 35,000 milligrams of caffeine in a single sitting before any effect takes hold when he's drinking as Phantom.

The calculations running at a 5:1 ratio, caffeine milligrams to weight pounds, the lowest end on the scale of average weight of a small female elephant (3,175 kilos), multiplied by five gives him the 15,875 milligrams that would be enough to give him a low buzz and keep him awake for a few hours. That's enough to kill the elephants on the low end of the scale.

(Jazz vetoed any kind of caffeine that wasn't naturally occuring in chocolate when he's Danny Fenton. She said that he's already died once and that he doesn't need heart problems to kill him.)

(Danny calls bull, but he isn't willing to risk his sister's ire.)

Because he can't let finals get the best of him, Danny decided to take it a step further.

The highest end of the scale for the average weight of female elephants is 4,050 kilos, multiplied by the same five, gives 20,250 milligrams of caffeine.

Essentially, the lower end of the scale would give him the same effect as 99 (and a bit) 473 milliliter cans of Rockstar Energy Drinks in one sitting. The higher end of the scale would be 126 (and a bit) 473 milliliter cans of Rockstar Energy Drinks in one sitting.

All that was left to do, now that he has the maths for the desired effect figured out, was to mix that in his favorite drink: A Red Eye.

Truly an abomination for the ages.

After way too much brain power, Phantom's completed coffee order looks like this:

A large Red Eye with 20,250 mg of caffeine

2 tablespoons of cinnamon

1 tablespoon of honey

1/8 cup of chocolate syrup

and 3 mint leaves or 1 teaspoon of mint extract

(he added 4 shots of vodka when he turned 21)

Danny is gonna kick his finals' ass, and be hyped up on caffeine while doing it!

Storyboard

[walmart-miku]

ok people we gotta stop making mori the source of all evil with soukoku. Yes mori is evil about how he treated yosano and a lot of the pm members but that's a whole other can of worms.

Anyways with skk MORI WOULD NOT TRY TO GET IN THEIR WAY IN FACT HE WOULD ENCOURAGE THEIR ASSES TO GET TOGETHER THIS PANEL EXISTS FOR A REASON.

MORI SHIPS THEM SO BAD ITS ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS.

Fics need to stop making this dude try to prevent skk from dating. I want a crack fic where mori is just like "Hey how was ur day do u like to kiss guys?" To both dazai and chuuya. I want mori shenanigans where he's actively trying so hard to set them up and Elise is sitting in a corner with kouyou and they're hard core judging him.

[thespineoftherighteous]

when Andrew is on press duty and has not been offered any sort of incentive to put any energy into it (sports interviews are SO freaking tedious) he's like Travis Scott in that video like "how do your pants not fall down?" *long pause* "belt."

[carry-on-my-wayward-gays]

Sometimes Ghost wakes up without Soap in his arms. It shouldn't be something to panic over but with what they do for a living - and when Ghost definitely remembers falling asleep with Soap next to him - it freaks him out a little bit.

Of course Soap is always fine. He can take care of himself. But still Ghost gets out of bed and goes searching for its partner.

Usually he finds Soap in the bathroom or getting something to drink or coming in from outside after hearing a noise and just wanting to be safe.

"There you are," Ghost will huff sleepily. It digs the heels of its hands in its eyes and rubs away sleep.

Soap will roll his eyes and finish up whatever he was doing when Ghost found him. "I'm a big boy, ya know. I can take care of myself." It's always delivered lightly, and Soap always goes and engulfs Ghost in a reassuring hug.

"I'm well aware." Ghost wraps his arms around Soap and rests his cheek on top of his head.

"Promise I'll stop scarin' ya." Soap mumbles into Ghost's chest. Ghost leans against a wall and pulls Soap with it.

"I don't think you will." Ghost whispers back.

They'll go back to bed and Ghost will practically wrap his whole body around Soap to make sure he doesn't leave until morning.

They never talk about Ghost's fear of losing Soap while asleep. They never acknowledge what could happen while Ghost was unable to fight back. And they never plan to.

Ghost doesn't get much sleep the rest of the night.

[gearchronocle]

this OPENING man. THIS OPENING. GOES SO INCREDIBLY HARD. FOR NO REASON. it should be illegal to have a song this good in a funny haha silly little comedy anime. I'm going crazy why is it so good. kaidou why r u going so hard on the vocals for NO!! REASON !!!

the fact that it's kaidou singing keeps me up at night. you go lil chuuni boy. eat that up like a full course meal and leave no crumbs not even the plate