#i'm going through the five stages of grief :(
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OKAY HELLO UH. SAVANACLAW DREAM UPDATE SPOILERS ?!?!!2!!2!2
THE. WAY BOTH JACK AND RUGGIE ADMIRE LEONA SO MYCH AND FEATURE HIM IN THEIR DREAMS 😭😭😭😭 Jack making Leona basically nOT HAVE DEPRESSION QUFBWKANDK 😭😭 and making him a fair player... Jack my boy... your dream is lovely but you made him do stuff hED NEVER DO 😭😭
AND RUGGIE. THE FACT HE AND LEONA NEVER MET IN THIS DREAM *BUT* THE AMAZING DRESM SCHOOL HE ATTENDS WAS SKGNKENAKjfkenalNIfjeksksn MADE/PROPOSED TO BE MADE (?) BY LEONA 😭😭😭 AND HE SAYS THAT PRINCE LEONA IS MORE POPULAR THAN FALENA AMONGST TYE YOUTH AJFNWKNudnekskalakdknsk tHEY WANT ME DEAD. D E A D.
and then ... ruggie says smth about him choosing the king he'll follow and LATER WHEN REFERRING TO LEONA HE SAYS SMTH TO JACK LIKE. "LET'S GO WAKE UP OUR KING" I'm fuckifnwjzbslakznaklNdkdkals akehueuqjakansksk THEY ADORE HIM SO MUCH. I CAN'T DO THIS.
So this means we'll get a full chapter ONLY for Leona's dream... I don't think we'll see him crying like Jack and Ruggie but GOD IF WE DO SEE THAT I'LL BE FOUND DEAD- i just knowwww that whichever way they go w it (the "he already knows it's a dream theory" or SMTH else), there WILL BE drama and I *WILL* die internally... my Leona plushies will pay the price (they will be hugged very tightly)
[Referencing the book 7 part 11 update!]
Me, coping: Oh, the book 7 Savanaclaw update is split into two parts? That means the first part must be dedicated to Jack and Ruggie and the second part must be Leona only. Surely this means I am free from being sniped in the Jack and Ruggie segment. Me, from the future:
. . .
ME EXPERIENCING THE FIVE STAGES OF GRIEF ALL AT ONCE
WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT 💀💀💀 I was kind of expecting some element of respecting their dorm leader to come up (definitely for Jack's), BUT NOT THIS EXTENT OTL
Of the two, Jack's dream was the more obvious one to feature Leona in a very positive light. His admiration for the guy was clear ever since book 2, in which Jack--someone who regularly sucks at expressing his feelings--confessed MULTIPLE TIMES that it was Leona's passionate magift play on TV that inspired Jack to follow in his footsteps. And that's why he was so disappointed to learn that the guy he admired all along was a scumbag that would play dirty to get ahead. The Leona in Jack's dream might be that version that Jack had in his head... The Leona he yearns for the attention and praise of, the Leona he thought was a virtuous leader who values hard work and good sportsmanship, the kind of person who gives speeches to inspire his team and helps people up by the hand when they fall. Another reading could be that this is the Leona Jack believes is still possible if he works toward it, because this dream seems to be set a YEAR after their loss to Diasomnia. And this is Leona at his best and most dangerous because he's throwing literally everything he has into this training, so he'll probably do the same in combat; Yuu and co. have to develop a whole strategy in advance to isolate Jack because they KNOW they're going to get blasted by dream!Leona if they give any inkling of trying to wake the dreamer up. JACK LITERALLY DREAMED ABOUT LEONA THRIVING, BEING HIS BEST SELF... Jack, the self-proclaimed LONE WOLF, who claims he doesn't like GROUP ACTIVITIES/SPORTS, longs to be part of the pack that LEONA leads... But he won't follow just anyone, Jack has standards AND LEONA APPARENTLY MEETS ALL OF THEM (or, in Jack's eyes, Leona can meet those standards).
THEN WHEN JACK WAKES UP... Hoo, boy... The way he was smiling but then broke down into shouts and sobs... That's literally got to be my favorite kind of emotional distress (part of why I loved Idia's breakdown when he was introducing his newly built little brother to the Styx researchers). You can hear how betrayed he feels in his voice, all the raw emotion that didn't come through as strongly in book 2. ASKHLBLBIASDIVDAI SORRY TO DUNK ON BOOK 2 AGAIN BUT IT'S TRUE. Jack's feelings of betrayal... They were so blunted there, it felt like he was reacting to a minor setback (he seems to easily shrug off being called a traitor by the guy he supposedly admires) rather than genuinely being hurt. I'm glad that the emotional weight that wasn't addressed then is finally getting the spotlight it deserves now.
Then Ruggie's dream???? 😭 That one caught me SO off-guard. The way it opens with Yuu and co. suspecting it's Leona's dream because they arrived in Sunrise City, one of the few industrialized places in Sunset Savanna... The lore review of how it's difficult to get the people to get behind developing the land due to how it would negatively impact the nature they want to live in harmony with (plus the brand-new reveal that these disagreements can become VIOLENT)... and Idia realizing that this, THIS is why Leona actually decided to take an internship at an energy and mining lab back home--because Leona realized he cannot change the country on his own, no matter how often he butts heads with his brother. He needs even more knowledge and a team to work with him. An NPC donut vendor lady randomly drops it on us that it's thanks the PRINCE LEONA that Ivorycliff Academy was able to be established. Not only that, but turns out Leona has graduated already and has spent his time after NRC building schools and establishing magift teams for Sunset Savanna (the latter being something Leona expressed interest in, as having a national sport and/or famous sporting teams can enhance his country's soft power). AND HE'S MORE POPULAR AMONG THE YOUTH THAN FALENA IS???????? MR. LEONA I-HATE-DEALING-WITH-KIDS KINGSCHOLAR IS POPULAR WITH... THE KIDS????? ? ?? ?? ?? ? ?? ?????? ?? ? 💀 The guy who claims to only help the underclassmen because they'd otherwise be an inconvenience to him... is admired by the same underclassmen... and now that has translated over to Ruggie's dream as the youth of Sunset Savanna loving him... OTL YOU'RE KIDDING ME RIGHT/????? ? ??? ? ??v????? ? ? ????
The most bewildering detail to me about Ruggie's dream is that he and Leona haven't met at all; Ruggie acts pretty clueless when asked about it and Leona graduated from a completely different school than him (NRC). There's no way they could have met, yet the dream still deemed that Leona was an important enough aspect of Ruggie's life that he was incorporated into it... and, unlike in real life, Leona now has the influence to make these systematic changes not just for bettering Ruggie's life, but the lives of everyone in Sunset Savanna...
UUUURURUGUUGHHGHHHHHHHGHGHHHHHHH H H HH H H HHHHHHH H H H HH H H AND THEN WWHEN RUGGIE FINALLY WAKES UP AND AND ANADNANDANDANASHADSNADSNADSNAN NDDDSDD SD SM ADSB,M ADSDBSM DDD HE CALLS HE WON'T FOLLOW A "FAKE KING", HE WANTS TO CHOSOE THE KING HE FOLLOWS 😭😭😭 RUGGIE TELLS JACK THEY SHOULD GO AND WAKE UP "OUR KING"... Ruggie, who constantly complains about how easy rich people have it and how hard Leona makes him work for his coin, is standing right here and HE'S CHOOSING LEONA.
This is all so crazy to think about because back in book 6 (citing the moment that broke me Yet Again, lmao) Leona implied that while he has hope in others (like Jamil), HE DOESN'T HAVE THE SAME HOPE FOR HIMSELF. But there's literally his whole dorm who trust him to lead them and their futures as professional athletes 😭 Jack who believes Leona is capable of being that shining, ideal senpai he dreamed of... Ruggie who believes Leona can and will change not only his life for the better, but also the lives of marginalized beastmen like hyenas, the younger generation, and heck, why not their whole country too... OTL
THIS IS LITERALLY THE WORST POSSIBLE OUTDCOME FOR ME... . . . . ....... . .. . . . .. . / / / / / . . . .. . .. ... . . . ... . . YOU JAVE JACK'S DREAM SUPPLYING THE RELIABLE BIG BRO/ONII-SAN LEONA... THEN RUGIGE'S DREAM SUPPYL inG THE SMAR TDETERMINED PRINCE LEONA ... AND THEN NEXT UPDAT.E.XBBCXL V.CV . . . . . . . . ...... .. .. . . . . OTL ASCTUAL LEOPJNA DFGFAYVAFIVAVIYAIAGIGEIYGEPEIQAGfhgpaebpyrwqeg,hpgqeugqm[gqepg./l.,pjm9hmh4 gephmhurwhbaudavmudfsgnyofegnyoifui
GOD IF EW SEE THAT BITCH CRYi NG gkj eabihlaegbiaegibyegoqetpr13569 87q3tbkhl3o tyb6fOfonfOTFsugfaiugfanyoigFGION qit' S LEOVER FOR MEAMBFFVHAJVFFVEUGFO EOFAENYFEOFHdhmFSLJGADFsmf aLALLL OF HIS PENT IUP FRUSTRATIONS JUST SPILLING OIUT;V .F,DSBFAHLFLFFNODGOVSMHFAV UEGOFEAHMAEGDGSKPFSHIM THE RAGE AT MALLEUS DFN BAFVKJAFYGLAFGIDGIDGIODGSOIDN FOR FOTRICNG THIS LIE UPON HIMFDS NFASVAEFBLADFIOBY AGIOQEGONYFWmpdphGAMGobf IT'D BE SO SEXSYFDH HOT IF HE KNEW IT WAS A DREAM ALL ALONG PELEEEEEASE 🙏 I'M ONT MY HANDS NAD NDD KNEEESLSD DFS,SFHBAFLHAFDLI EO FQEYG VADGNOVSHUPVPUFFmhagyo 4wpeq/pll.,wjph9q80th9umpdbsaihoadnFSuov fsogyFSGUOFSu SNOGYAVUO FSA
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. Ah-HEM!! 😇 Sorry, I don't know what overcame me... I just blacked out and when I came to I don't remember what I was doing or saying for the past several minutes 💖 Now if you'll excuse me, I am filled with an intense desire to enact violence on the nearest lion-shaped object I can get my hands on--
#twst#disney twisted wonderland#disney twst#twisted wonderland#Leona Kingscholar#Jack Howl#Ruggie Bucchi#Savanaclaw#notes from the writing raven#NOT L*ONA ROT#book 7 part 11 spoilers#jp spoilers#Idia Shroud#book 7 spoilers#book 6 spoilers#book 2 spoilers
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Andrew Rannells: two time tony loser, one time olivier loser
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No Transplant.
I'm not getting Transplant?
Transplant is not happening?
But what about That and Sorn? What about the guys who escaped? What about the stolen kidneys from Triage?
WHAT ABOUT ME?!
What about me?
Oh.
I guess this means....we're not getting Transplant. I hope Max knew about this and is okay.
#Transplant when?#NEVER!#I'm going through the five stages of grief#and a secret sixth stage that I just invented for this purpose#MaxTUL!!!!!!#If I had known the last time was the last time I would've appreciated it more#I'm in mourning for what could have been
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Signs of the Apocalypse (aka, chapter 109)
#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#anime-only's gonna be going through the five stages of grief when I'm not even done with mine yet 🥲#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bsd spoilers#bungou stray dogs season five#bsd season five#bsd season 5#bsd anime#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#bsd dazai#chuuya nakahara#bsd chuuya#sigma#bsd sigma#soukoku#bsd soukoku#bsd chapter 109#bsd meme#bsd memes
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where were u wen pricefield die
i was at house eating beans when phone ring
"Pricefield is kil"
"no"
#i'm going through the five stages of grief :(#life is strange double exposure#life is strange#max caulfield#chloe price#pricefield#double exposure spoilers#i havent played it yet either but based on what i saw
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ROTZBACKE! HAKENZAHN! OI! OI! OI!
#I know some people will disagree with me here and that is totally okay :#I grew up watching httyd and I absolutely prefer the german version over the og (which doesn't happen often)#I think it is so undeniably better in my opinion because it 1) is what I am used to#and 2) because I'm a northern german and the way they talk seems so close to home its just nice-#um's auf gut deutsch zu sagen: die hamburgern so schön /lh#of course in my family we mostly speak like that for emphasis or whatever but I JUST AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH I LOVE IT SO MUCH#I can speak along with the movie in its entirety in german I just-only piece of media that had more of an impact on my life than Undertale#I will say I am sadly not a third movie enjoyer. I'm sorry I just didn't like it very much but I respect the people who do#I also have only watched it once while I've watched rtte like... idk 3 times?#also finally getting to the drawing- I LOVE SNOTLOUT AND HOOKFANG SO MUCCH#also Rotzbacke's Synchronsprecher is just so damn funny-#oh btw Planzin and Tectco watched me go through the five stages of grief when I realized the reason why angel dust sounded so familiar#in the german dub was because the voice actor is the same guy who voice acts fishlegs in german#pitske’s art#pitskederdoenerhaendler#so much shit going down guys I need to draw the entire dragon rider crew#httyd fanart#httyd#snotlout#snotlout jorgenson#hookfang#how to train your dragon
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I'm so sorry Sebastian likers but I've started referring to him as Eustace in my head.
#oh god some of my mutuals aren't gonna like this#one day new fans are going to come in and they're going to play the port and not know anything about the fan translation and only refer to#them with the official names and we are going to have to accept that.#you will not catch me calling him Sebastian in 10 years I'm sorry but eventually no one's going to know who we're talking about and#it's better to go through the five stages of grief and get to acceptance now rather than later#ace attorney#Justine I'm already calling Verity just because I can never remember her fan translation name anyways lol#the one I'm having the hardest time remembering is Eddie for Ray#like I think Eddie is a good name for him I just can't get it to stick in my brain#eustace winner#sebastian debeste#aai2
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The Ivan R6 flashback and the tiny MiziTill one at the end are a fucking punch in the guts
#i need an introspective till mini comic#manifesting it#if sua and ivan can get one so can he#at least ivantill is in heaven now#these days i'm gonna read every reincarnation and canon divergence fic on the face of ao3#i'm going through the five stages of grief rn#i'm unwell#alien stage#alnst#alnst round 7#alien stage round 7
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ten thousand words into an AU where the 118 are on a ghost-hunting reality TV show but also Buck can see ghosts for real and I had to take a five-minute break to full-on disassociate bc I only just realized that I made Buck a ghost whisperer
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opened my dash and it’s literally just “speak now cardigan” “speak now cardigan” “speak now cardigan” “speak now cardigan”
#it is cute!! however it is also SEVENTY POUNDS??? in this economy????????/#i didn't even buy the folklore cardigan because i felt that was unjustifiably expensive and i'm sure that wasn't this bad#i have to go through a three day contemplation period and all five stages of grief before i can cope with spending that much#on anything non essential no matter how nice it is#talking#taylor swift
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Kid fans fighting for our lives out here.
#I'm going through the five stages of grief rn#This is the worst I'm upset with a capital U man#I'm still in denial hoping the leaks are wrong or exaggerated#There ain't enough copium in the world to get me through this#eustass kid#kid pirates
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one time, when I was twenty, I told an art school friend that not only is Bobby Briggs my favorite character from Twin Peaks but he's the only person on the show I find remotely likable, and I watched him go through all five stages of grief before turning to me and saying in such a soft voice, "you have the worst opinions."
#i mean I'm still right but i will never forget that pause#this is my version of saying some corny shit and watching some girl go through the five stages of grief bc she still wants to fuck me#joke tag#tess talks
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I was minding my business crossing the street and some Fucking DICKHEADS hit me with a water balloon
#and like I'm wearing jeans#going through the five stages of grief in Target#i hope they have the day they deserve#personal
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Does anyone still remember the "Flowey is not a good Life Coach" series from years ago? Cuz I do, and after rewatching Vade/Calysto's dub of the comic I remembered that it was based on a fanfic, which I immediately went to go and read again. And... well, needless to say I'm ruined. I kinda wanna kick past me for stopping barely into fic, but also I'm so glad I didn't put myself through all that despair and the entire emotional rollercoster that is that story. I... I need some wholesome Flowey content after all of that. I'll start by revisiting the Floweypot AU. Yeah.
#undertale#flowey#momento rambles#god that ending destroyed me#it was like going through all five stages of grief but all five stages are just denial#also i need more papyrus and flowey content in general their dynamic would be so good#preferably something sweet and fluffy first before anything else i'm in desperate need of a palate cleanser right now
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the thing is i know none of you know what he looks like but can you BLAME me for agonizing over not even getting the chance to fumble a certified very pretty man
#i compared the way that he's pretty to assad zaman and my friend corroborated. just so you know what i'm dealing with!!!#i'm so serious when i say even the posts i've been posting about hotprof dont get across the inner turmoil ive been going through#FOR NO REASON#i literally went through the five stages of grief over this guy meanwhile i'm on like three gay dating apps. why#whatever. if you met him youd understand 😒#karinyo.txt#college
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#Nothing to see here folks!#Just an old bitch whining and being annoying about stuff - move along! Pay no attention to the hater behind the curtain!#Wrestling is Bad Actually#*Heavy sigh*#I miss wrestling#I really do#I miss watching it and enjoying it and getting excited about it and writing fic about it#But I just can't do any of that anymore. Tony Khan ain't letting me LOL#And I have boring real life adult problems and wrestling used to be my escape from all that but NOT ANYMORE!#It's just really hitting me today how much I'm in Fandom Limbo#I stopped watching AEW months ago because - to put it as diplomatically as possible - it is very much Not For Me anymore#And everything I've seen and heard since then has only confirmed I made the right decision there#But I don't currently have another hyper-fixation to fill the void#So I'm just stuck here desperately waiting for something else to come and save me from this nightmare#And I don't want to be a hater! I used to fucking LOVE AEW and I take no joy in how much I think it sucks nowadays#And I don't wanna be a party pooper either - I see everyone else squeeing about the Bucks or Junglecorpse or MJF and Ospreay or Bryan#And it's just like...I'm glad y'all are having fun - really! But GOOD LORD does none of that appeal to me in the slightest#Most of my faves aren't getting booked - let alone pushed!#And the few that are are even worse off because Tony's booking is SO BAD it makes me unable to give a shit about wrestlers I used to love#I feel like Lieutenant Dan on New Years - everyone else is having a grand ol' time while I'm just sat here like 🙁#I feel like I'm going through the fives stages of grief in regards to fandom at the moment and it is not a good time let me tell ya#So yeah - don't be surprised if I stop being a wrestling blog the second the new Dragon Age game comes out#Save me Bioware! You're my only hope!
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