#i'm barely making it out alive NOW

[fiona-fififi]

We're gonna fucking die when they really let Ryan loose, too. Can you imagine both of these fuckers pulling this bullshit??

[outlying-hyppocrate]

well. did you fucking miss me.

[nobodybetterlookatme]

I don't care if the texts are about what you're eating for dinner, I'll take all the crumbs I can get !!

LMAO yeah okay here you go. And upon reading them this morning it wasn't that funny so idk why I was laughing almost hysterically last night about it ahskalslal

[sleepykittties]

tag game

Tagged by @mercurymiscellany, thank you!!!

⟡ rules: answer + tag 9 people you want to get to know better and/or catch up with!

⟡ favourite colour: Generally mid-to-light shades of blue, not super bright or dark though

⟡ last song: Bad for Me- Landon Austin

⟡ last movie: Uhhh... I'm genuinely not sure. I think I watched the new Mario movie with a friend a couple months ago? I struggle to get myself to watch things recently, I've been intending to watch Puss in Boots: The Last Wish for literal months and just executive dysfunction says no that's too hard.

⟡ currently reading: Nothing but fanfiction. Reading physical things with new characters is challenging because brain won't let me focus and none of the series I follow has put out a new book recently.

⟡ currently watching: Mostly reaction stuff on youtube, it's fairly entertaining, mindless, and let's me not think which is all I want at this point.

⟡ currently craving: The energy to do anything. Mostly to redo my resume so I can find a new job and hopefully recover from burnout enough to actually have a life. I am suffering but don't have the energy to do anything about it and thus continue.

⟡ tea or coffee? Coffee, I don't like tea, it tastes like hot perfume water, and the past year or so caffeine is how I force myself through the workday

Tag: @prince-liest @ectochoir @vypridae @themackenziemachine @showyoumyfavoriteobsession if you guys feel like it, or whoever else wants to! please feel free to consider yourself tagged

[mysterywheeze]

If you've ever struggled with suicidal ideation, this has likely been a particularly difficult week. It certainly has been for me. I've lost a lot of trust in a lot of people. I hope this post doesn't make anyone lose trust in me.

You need to live. That means you, the person reading this post. I don't know your name or your situation but I know, with the same certainty that I know that the Earth is turning, that you need to live.

I know that it can be hard, crushingly hard. I know what it's like to feel so empty that getting out of bed seems impossible, or so overwhelmed that drastic action seems like the only way out.

It isn't. Death is not the answer. It sure as fuck isn't praxis. Please, please do not let anyone convince you otherwise. If you think that your death will have a net positive effect on the world, I promise you, as someone who has been there before, it won't.

And while I encourage you to do what you can to try and make the world a better place - donate to charity, pick up litter, volunteer your time, write your representatives, et cetera - I want to make it clear that those aren't requirements you need to meet to justify being alive. Your life has value, inherently.

Today things may be terrible. They may stay terrible for a while. But one day, a song will get stuck in your head that makes you feel something again. You'll meet a dog that loves you unconditionally. You'll eat a meal that tastes like it was cooked by an angel. You'll pick up a new hobby, perhaps without even realizing it, and it will bring you some sense of satisfaction. You'll watch a beautiful movie. You'll walk past a beautiful mural. Someone will compliment your outfit, someone will laugh at your joke, someone will tell you they're happy to spend time with you. One day you will wake up early enough to see the sun rise.

It's a cliche to say "it will get better". That's because it's true. It probably won't be a linear upward trend, rarely do things stay better forever, but there will come a time when you'll be glad you stayed alive. I promise.

[marshmellowtea]

tempted to give chris a contradictory yet intertwined tangle of food issues. like "does he have an eating disorder" yes all of them literally all of them

[shipping1addict]

I recently played the Spirit of Vengeance FP again and when the cutscene of the aftermath played and we Saw Heta presenting her speech to her supporters, something clicked.

See that? In addition to what happend to Bask Sunn in "Showdown on Ruhnuk", Tyrus Brokenblade also fell on Kessan's Landing.

So WHO is left?

Durn Wynnward aka representer of the Ash'ad.

My guess is that with the next story-fragment, we get to face off agains Durn and hopefully after that, Heta herself.

~ more theorising under the cut ~

I didn't realise that they gave us this very obvious fight-the-small-fish-first-and-then-the-big-one hint at the beginning of the "Hidden Chain" storyline, but here we are.

I find it also interesting that Heta talks about reliability in this speech. Making a statment with injuring Tyrus and endangering not only the people in the room but herself.

Now that she found out about Bask's betrayal and his greed (who would've known /s) and the loss of Tyrus, the mentality with which she will continue her operations will propably get very interesting.

Since Sa'har, her interest in mando-communication also seems very neglected. I don't know if this is on purpose or if the few cutscenes we got just gave away too little information.

I would also need to rewatch every cutscene to build upon my theories.

[tokyoteddywolf]

22 isn't very much at all, I think.

[turtlemagnum]

thinking about how the people around me, particularly people i dont know anymore, impacted my fantasy setting. the raccoon people i added because of a friend who wanted to be a raccoon. goblins existing in the way that they do because of someone i still know who really likes a specific kind of goblin, and made me like them too. even minor things, like deciding that a character's eyes were gray because the person i was talking to also had gray eyes. there"s definitely a lot of me in there, but there's still little bits and pieces of others in there too

[izzyizumi]

{Well, it's been fun.}

@taichi-x-koushiro still exists too, and I may rb more of them there (what I can find) in the future; ... but Yeah

[stereax]

woohoo spiraling out of control right now (what else is new really I've been fucked up and spiraling for weeks now) and trying to figure out reasons not to delete my tumblr and discord and myself along the way

but you know. talking about myself on my blog automatically means I'm attention seeking and fishing for pity right? should just shut up and stick to the news eh, it's all I'm good for :D

anyway if you need me I'll be in the corner reliving the past, coming to terms with reality, and trying to convince myself I'm not the problem despite every indication to the contrary ✌︎︎

[13eyond13]

how did I forgor Mad Max: Fury Road (2015) when I had to list my favourite movies here recently

[koushirouizumi]

{My Fam}

{DO NOT COPY} {DO NOT RE-POST} {DO NOT RE-PRODUCE WITHOUT PERMISSION FOR ANY USAGE WHATSOEVER}

If you want to use for referring to, PLEASE ASK ME PRIVATELY FIRST OR I WILL REFUSE.

[deadrlngers]

— OCS AND TRAGIC HORROR TROPES.

i was tagged by @florbelles @henrytlney @denerims @jillvalcntines @devilbrakers @indorilnerevarine @swordcoasts @nuclearstorms to take this quiz for my ocs, thank you all soso much!!!

tagging: i'm pretty sure this made the rounds already jsfkjfkd so i'm not directly tagging anyone but if you see this and want to give it a shot just say i tagged you!! <3

THE FINAL GIRL

the final girl comes out the other end of trauma alive- or, they were supposed to. honestly, you're not so sure you're really alive anymore. you saw the same hurt take those you were closest to while everyone paraded your bruises as bravery, as strength, as if you're the hero. and it hurts. you're tired and you don't want to have to be brave anymore. whatever you went through, it changed so much of who you were that you're still getting used to the person you see in the mirror. you didn't have a say in any of it, but you're here now, and that's gotta count for something. you'll make it count for something. but first, you need to let yourself find rest.

FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER

this plight is the simplest of them all: you did not ask for this. you were never given a choice. no part of yourself feels human, just a collection of traits you've picked up from mirroring anyone you could, even the people you meet through a television screen. it's alienating to live that way- yet someone has called you the alienating one. maybe too many people to count. maybe they treated you so uncomfortably inhuman that it's all you can understand now, or you've dug yourself into such a deep hole in an attempt to keep safe that you can't remember a person living in the home of your body at all. being alive is confusing and painful and lonely and loud but living is all there is to being human- you're already there. just take air into your lungs and breathe. close your eyes and picture a beautiful sky. you made that. you painted that yourself.

THE VAMPIRE

it is the loneliest day of a vampire's life, the first time they look into a mirror and see their reflection missing. drinking blood sucks too, don't get me wrong, but as a vampire you had to learn to hide from the sunlight, from your family, all your friends, because you were unavoidably different now and you didn't know how to explain that to them in a way they would understand. you could get stranger's blood in bursts, but what is life when you can't know someone for longer than the night lasts? you left everything behind because it was easier than trying to tell them. i just hope you know you're not the only vampire out there, and that there exist people who will understand your situation without a word. they'll sit with you in the dark for as long as you'll need them to.

[my-balls79]

my mother was ranting at me again, the following is paraphrased: “the fact that you never do anything, can’t manage to do your school work and you can hardly take care of yourself tells me that you are a LAZY person” yes, mother, i am lazy, how could you tell? you do not even know the full extent of it, would you believe that i’m also too lazy to derive pleasure out of anything? would you believe the amount of times i’ve nearly killed myself because i am too damn lazy to be alive? i’m well aware of my laziness. fucking cunt.

[bakerysnake]

not this again