#i'm an energy conscious person and i prefer to keep them off for that

[jackalxhearts]

setting aside all other kayfabe things about the lights poll: it's not that expensive to leave a light or two on. like. have you ever seen the breakdown of an electricity bill before

[shibaincubus]

How to stop being a doormat.-

-> . . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋ [By a healed people pleaser] ࿐ྂ

Being nice to others is not a bad trait, but becoming THE NICE GIRL is.

Excessive people pleasing brings you nowhere and makes you vulnerable to becoming a doormat, disrespect, and sacrificing yourself.

People pleasing isn’t just about being nice to everyone all the time; it actually messes with your head and how you think about yourself deep down. 

We can look at people pleasing from an conscious and subconscious side.

Conscious People pleasing

This is what we typically associate with people pleasing:

You can't say no: Every request feels like an obligation.

You prioritize others over yourself: Your needs take a backseat.

You apologize for everything: Even when it’s unnecessary.

You avoid conflicts: Peace at any cost, right?

You make yourself small: Shrinking your presence to fit in.

Subconscious people pleasing

This is the impact people pleasing has on your mindset and behaviours

While breaking people pleasing one should focus here more

Servant mindset -> catering to others drains your energy.

Emulating others ->  You lose sight of who you truly are.

Seeking validation: "I need to be ... to get validation 'love' from others

Ignoring your feelings: Suppressing your emotions to keep the peace.

Feeling judged: Worrying about what others think of you.

Anxiousness about acceptance: "Do they really like me?"

The Why of People pleasing

The first step in breaking free is understanding why you engage in people pleasing.

Here are some common reasons:

You might be people pleasing because of...

Anxiety: fear of disappointing others or rejection

Low self esteem: "pleasing others is the only way to get acceptance and love"

Past trauma: can link others' needs to safety and affection

Cultural or family expectations: Pressure from those around you.

Perfectionism:  The need to be flawless in the eyes of others.

Insecurity: Doubting your own worthiness.

Avoidance of Conflict: Preferring peace over confrontation.

To get the exact cause you should also utilise journaling.

Use 15 min. for three or more of these journaling prompts each

Does People pleasing really help me? How do I feel when I please people? Happy or drained?

Do I get something back by pleasing people. Is it one sided?

What is my earliest memory of people pleasing? Why did I decide to please people at that time?

How do I perceive the people that I please in reality? Do I even like them.

What is the thing I really want in this situation that I might feel too scared, vulnerable, or ashamed to ask for?

What is one thing that I'm scared people will think of me, and how is this actually true and useful for me?

What do I want to change about my people pleasing habit

This reflection makes it clear why we do it and what caused people pleasing to be ingrained in us in the first place.

Recovering from People pleasing

Start small.-

Begin by setting boundaries in low stakes situations

declining invitations to events etc.

declining requests that you don't have time or desire to do

Gradually work yourself up to more significant situations practicing assertiveness along the way.

Learn to tolerate discomfort

Recognise that asserting yourself and setting boundaries may initially feel uncomfortable or cause anxiety

Embrace the discomfort as a sign of growth and remind yourself that it's necessary to prioritize your own well being.

Strengthen your sense of self

When we are people pleasing we are placing our self worth on another person

With journaling, self care, setting personal goals and new hobbies, you can construct and identity independent of others opinions.

The Intention Interrogation

Ask yourself a specific question before agreeing to a request:

"Am I doing this because I genuinely want to, or because I'm afraid of potential consequences?" 

This can delay automatic people pleasing reflexes

Cut toxic people off

If someone is using you for their gain, it’s time to create distance.

Limit your availability and emotional investment

Create space between yourself and toxic relationships

And Trust your instincts

The 24-Hour Rule

Make it a commitment to not immediately respond to requests.

Give yourself a full day and then decide if you actually want to do this.

Get therapy

If people pleasing has a deep impact socially or otherwise on you consider therapy

It's really helpful against people pleasing if nothing else helps

That's it lovelies

People pleasing is a destructive social mechanism of ours that we developed in young years.

Unfolding these behaviours and taking a stance against pleasing others frees ourself for positive change and levelling ourselves up

[fatuismooches]

greetings!!! this is the first time i've ever shared my idea to anyone, kind of worry but guess that i have to share it with you because your writings are so good and i love how you execute scenarios and ideas (literally awake all night scrolling through your brainrot 😭😭😭😭)

let me tell you that fragile!reader and dottore is what keeps me awake at night i love them so much, i literally read everything in the tags, the fluff and angst is SOO GOOD NGL.

so, angst/ no comfort (because i love tormenting myself (⁠◠⁠‿⁠・⁠)⁠—⁠☆), fragile!reader and terminal lucidity - somebody suddenly became lively and conscious before their deaths. i see that you have written about fragile!reader whose memories are slowly deteriorating or slowly losing their eyesight. imagine one day, everything just come back...normal, the sudden recollection of memories, vision returned miraculously, no pain, no suffering, as if they were back to the days at Akademiya. they became gleeful, happy, full of live, no longer the gloomy, sick-ridden individual.

Dottore, of course, was surprised at this phenomenal, run more tests and check-ups just to be sure that we are actually healthy because there is no way we actually turn healthy after being sick in centuries. the segments however, especially Zandy, didn't think much about the whole ordeal. you are fine!! you can finally walking and running freely without being on life-support. your turn in health manage to turned them into a bunch of joyful, blue-haired maniacs with giddy, happy smiles on their lips.

we are fine for a few weeks, which also make Dottore himself believe that maybe, maybe his efforts have paid off, maybe our health have been stable, and maybe from now on, he could spend the rest of eternity with his beloved.

then we die (this is so mean i'm so sorry 😭😭😭😭😭). how they perish is completely up you but i'd preferably that they die in their sleep, a peaceful death. Dottore and the segments are... well, shocked is an understatement, their whole world have...gone, they'd question themself: how can this happen? you were fine in the past few weeks? In which Dottore blame himself the most, he shouldn't have believed that we were fine, he should have run more test, he should have been more cautious about the whole situation but now he completely felt... helpless, for the first time in millions of years. the only person who went thick and thin, the person that can tolerate him in the Akademiya days and the person that he can tolerate now have passed away.

(the ending is kind if short because idk what else to say since my vocabulary and grammar is rather limited. i hope this would be sufficient 😭😭😭😭😭 also looking forward on how you react to this. for now i'll just cry myself to sleep with this scenario while waiting for your work ❤️🥰)

- 🪷

It would come out of nowhere, no one expected it, no one believed it in the beginning. After all, over four hundred years of debilitating illness makes it hard for anyone to believe something good finally happened. But it does, when you first wake up you can feel that something is different - you definitely do some test runs in your room, picking up objects that were once too heavy for you, simple actions that no longer left you tired, no more aches or pains, it was marvelous. So obviously with your newfound energy, you sprint out to find anyone, hell even a random agent would do, because you're finally free. (You can already hear the voices of the segments - no running in the lab because of the very obvious dangers.)

Naturally, Dottore is very skeptical of this, yes, he does not trust how his heart beats at the sight of your glowing self putting on a little performance for him to show how healthy you are now, he can't bring himself to. He's witnessed how low you could become from the worst stages of your sickness, so although he's more than happy to see you well, the possibility of you falling back into such a state is very high. However he cannot find anything, and you don't show any visible signs either. Even so, he still watches you very closely. It's a feeling that always nags, one that may always nag him perhaps, the thought of you becoming worse. But he's not going to damper your mood with his thoughts, you should enjoy this.

Dottore and the segments would still scold you for your recklessness but realize that you are no longer sick and frail and they no longer have to fuss over your health. It's a very strange sensation that's hard to break out of since they've been doing it for so long. But it's good! You're happy! You're strong! You're the [Name] that was buried away, come to rise to the surface once more. Let's just say Zandy very much enjoys the piggyback rides. The checkups still persist as a general measure, but they always go smoothly. It seems there's nothing to worry about.

You would want to assume your role of his assistant once again right away - it's something you've been longing for, to be able to be useful to your lover just like how you once were. To live those days of banter and sharing fascinating knowledge and listening to each other's ideas once more. And so you do, Dottore's more than happy to let you, oh how he's missed you by his side so often. He's excited, he's ready to put the past four hundred years behind and move on, his mind already racing with the countless possibilities that have opened up now. Unfortunately, they don't come to fruition.

Perhaps you felt something wasn't right but it was already far too late - on the day of your death you acted like everything was normal, carrying out your new duties, but also with a lot of added affection, visiting each segment and Dottore and kissing them with all your love. They don't think much of it, you're usually affectionate like that. If only they knew that would be the last time they were embraced by you. Little Zandy too - it would be the last time you ever hugged him and listened to you read him a story. He'd be absolutely inconsolable after your death.

With you gone, the spark in his life would be gone. It would be the same routine of his duties and experiments and research, with nothing to ease his tension. Sure, he no longer has to spend lots of time finding a cure or producing medicine, but this wasn't the way he wanted it to happen. It's the same as when you were sleeping, except this time he no longer has the anticipation of you eventually waking up. Or does he?

Resurrection is a forbidden art, but he is Il Dottore, the one who has no problem sinking his hands into what should not be done, and he is Zandik, the one who loves you. If this world wants you gone so badly, then so be it. He will simply reach for your hand and pull you back to him every time, because even if it is lifeless, he will make sure it's warm once again.

[hwnglx]

can you do a reading on what enhypen members think of lesserafim

thought i'd do both groups ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

what do enhypen and le sserafim think about each other?

based on tarot. i do not know these idols personally. energies are always changing. what i say is NOT straight fact. pls take it with a grain of salt!

enhypen > le sserafim

heeseung 8ofp, knofc, 9ofw, queofp - phew, cards flew for him. he has a lot of thoughts for sure. views them as very hardworking and business-oriented women. also very stable financially. might've had a fling that ended on bad terms. some flirty energy and guardedness here. jay 7ofc, knofc - sees them as a group with a lot of opportunities and choices. also get the flirty for energy for him, might be daydreaming a lot about someone in the group. he's definitely crushing. (leaning towards yunjin) jake 4ofw, highpr - seems to get along with some of them pretty well and thinks they're a lot of fun, while other members might seem more mysterious and enigmatic to him. like they're more difficult to approach sunghoon empr, 7ofc&world - thinks they're beautiful, sensual, feminine and gentle. believes they're great at realizing their abundance of opportunities, a wellrounded group sunoo - god i'm sorry but the cards were so confusing and messy, very all over the place for him. i'm taking it as he just doesn't want me to know for now. jungwon 4ofp, devil - might think they're kinda greedy and materialistic. they always want their way and can get selfish or manipulative sometimes. lowkey spoiled too niki 7ofw, pagofc - seems to view them as very defensive and opinionated people who know how to stand up for themselves. also might have a little crush on someone, i'm getting cute little puppy love

le sserafim > enhypen

sakura devil, 9ofw, herm&6ofw - thinks they're kinda toxic. thinks both groups function better and are more successful when distanced, without getting in the way of eachother. she prefers just staying away from them to avoid drama chaewon strengthrx, towerrx, hangm - thinks they're way too unstable and lack control of their emotions and power to stand up for themselves. might think they don't know how to progress because of that. i'm lowkey getting "company's favorite child" like they just do whatever they're told yunjin lovers&4ofc, 2ofp+3ofc - seemed to have rejected someone lmao. might think they just play around too much and have too many girls/people they talk to. getting the vibe she just sees them as too immature still kazuha death, 5ofp, 7ofc+kingofp - doesn't think about them much, like she literally doesn't enjoy the thought. ngl, there's some weird and heavy energy here i don't really wanna dive into further. she does acknowledge they're rich in opportunity though, and good at what they do eunchae emper, knofsw, pagofsw - the only one i didn't get heavy energy from. thinks they're strong, reliable and passionate people. but might see them as kinda reckless and sharp-tongued in some ways. they can get too impulsive in her eyes. might be some gossiping going on here

the nine of wands seemed to be a reoccurring and significant card. i think a lot of the caution comes from wanting to avoid scandals, etc. they're probably aware a single glance can get overanalyzed by crazy fans, so they're more wary and conscious of how to behave around one another.

bottom of the deck in the end was the six of swords and it kept catching my eye somehow. so, i believe it's likely that they're also not really close off cam (def fought a bit, normal between co-workers tho) and might prefer staying distant in order to keep things peaceful.

[lunarsilkscreen]

Boredom

Nature of the Job; I don't have a lot of freedom... They keep reminding me that I could pull a [Dick Cheney] whenever I want and that should be sufficient equivalent exchange...

I'm uncomfortable. I've been uncomfortable for what seems like several years. They tell me that this kind of isolation is not good for a person's mental health... 😒

I have a very powerful Tablet I could be playing games on; but none of this is comfortable... So I stick to my phone.... The purposeful downgrade...

I'm not even allowed to access any of my old accounts because of their inherent insecurity. RIP Steam account... RIP MMOs....

I could download and play them; but then I would be frustrated at having to start over.

So I plink around on Sudoku-Likes (why are these stupid apps pay-to-play? Why is it so expensive to play easy games? Stupid old people.)

And of course; Hearthstone, where they keep testing AI that are purposefully geared to the highest level players; and several other high-ranking players because they like that I'm an actual challenge and they actually lose against me in interesting ways.

Bleeeehhhh...

So Ive written lots of these posts just waiting.

I feel like a Kid again! Not in the good way; that "Waiting for your Mother to finish shopping" kind of way... Wow... What a near exact replica of my childhood.

Gameboy Games and Waiting.

Except without the Nintendo Switch... Because they might confiscate it for *reasons*.

They say "Training ends the day you start your new Job" ughhhh...

I have a lot of pent up negative energy.

I want to break all the things. I want to step in a Truck.

They keep feeding me pellets like "Don't forget your Bride" and "just think of all the Presidential Trolling you'll be able to do." And all the hobbies you'll be able to get back to once you're "Free".

I want to bang my head against a wall.

They said I could always take a "moon trip" weeds in every corner store nowadays...

They know they'll sabotage it too.

So I can't even do that unless I wanna take a *real* bad trip.

I'm not even sure exactly how much of what I post actually makes it to the public; or if I'm stuck on a private Tumblr server for EVER.

And then I realize that this mirrors all of President Trump's "presidential tweeting". I understand why he never stopped tweeting now.

This Sucks.

I've taken to doing silly side quests just to get through it. Side Quests are expensive.

At least with my current salary.

One of them is almost over; they made an faux account for my Credit Cards (which have already been paid off) and I'm just spending money into as if I haven't already.

Unless I'm actually just going crazy and this is a Dream where I only think I'm President-Elect...

But at least my bills will be paid off.

I have no Idea where I'll be taken next or when..or even if I'll be conscious for it.

My next side-quest is to purchase a Vehicle (preferably with room to sleep in it) just so I can make a Jail Break for the border...

Or just, go camping I GUESS.

The position they have me in is equivalent to being homeless; so I've just been playing the part in order to keep an ounce of integrity.

I wonder if this is actually a plot to Usurp power since I can't really stop them.

Then I remember they could just kill me.

Then I wonder if certain [un-alivings] of certain figures were to cover up a self-sacrifice.

It's like being in Solitary confinement without the Solitary.

It messes with your head.

And I keep wondering if *any* thing is real anymore.

They keep telling me that I'm one of the first to take it so well.

THANKS MOM. FOR THE TRAINING. I GUESS.

I'm in the forefront of human knowledge, I cannot write anything new, because no one has caught up. If you're wondering how; I listened to nearly every podcast about every thing over the course of a few years.

I have not watched a lot of new movies or anything.

Nothing good on Netflix; and my feed is full of my own content force-fed back to me in different ways.

It's like I can't do anything unless it's study political, economic, and scientific trends and write analyses on them.

And watch TV shows where some part of my life takes center stage. Which; great for the narcissism; bad for the headaches as I learn new things about my own history in fiction.

I have to wait on mathematical textbooks to change because I'm terrible at Trigonometry and Calculus functions.

Also it's a pain to do complex math stuff on your phone... Somebody should really make an app for that.

Well... Back to listening to that podcast my wife made for me...

Better not be intruded on by that guy that talks that way that makes me want to kick his disembodied voice into the stratosphere again...

[astrxlfinale]

I'm yours as long as you want me.

Even with the speedy crawl of many hours later, those words had never left his mind, nor had the atmosphere ever 'recovered' from such a welcomed sense of change. It felt as if a boundless river of energy tore itself open from an unknown reservoir, cascading in brilliance, just allowing them to bask in this moment even after she had to make sure her beloved band of troublemakers were appropriately in bed.

Now here they remain, the end of a certain deal no longer completed, as beyond the visible shine of that screen remains a resting Guinaifen. Soft, content breaths escaping her well after she comfortably dozed off, his excitable voice, ones full of ideas of what to do, and these particular theories on a new favorite series lulling her off to the whimsies of dreamland. Even now, his eyes couldn't resist just bearing witness to the scene, reflecting on how 'good night' spoken from her lips was woven into it's own band of poetry.

Too many times did his hand try to reach for that bright red button, an appropriate time and means to end the call, yet, wrestling within his own was the very gauntlet of such a challenge.

'I.. Really do just want her to be here. Shoot, hope I ain't being too weird about it.' A desire to let this closeness remain, to bask in the security of seeing Gui simply doing well, to the almost fairy tale like view of how peace settles on her beautiful visage as she rests. His hand already held the desire to simply drift through her tresses, to help sooth her deeper into a state of rest.

Preferably, the selfishness within wanted to be that pillow she was currently cuddled up with. Allowing for his chest to be the replacement, and for the both of to be whisked off dreamland upon a similar boat.

He was growing ever more conscious of the change situated before them. In many ways, it felt as if their adamant hands were tearing a dream from the unseen realms and into reality itself. Just the mere idea of meaning so much to her, for them to dig open their personal and homey cove, that's what made it impossible to actually exit the call. Upon the main screen ahead, their shared stream of cartoons had melted off as a sense of blissful white noise.

To say he was fine with the arrangement was an understatement, this is how it needs to be. That Heart of Hearts was certain about that singular fact.

Thus he'd work that bed nest a bit better, similar to how he always does; a bundle of pillows underneath the head while his blanket is adjusted up to the hips. The dark shirt he adorns was more than enough warmth, and instead of peering at the ceiling, this time he keeps situated at the side, the glow of this very screen being a miracle as a growing wave of exhaustion settles over him in kind. 'Mannnnn.. Still can't believe she actually liked those theories! Heheh, hope I didn't go too damn overboard.' Gods did that make him giddy.

"Hope you know what you were sayin, Gui." A gentle chuckle rumbles within his chest as the urge to caress his damn phone of all things had to be stopped. That certainly was no replica for her luxurious soft her hair could be! As long as he wants her. Caelus, being someone who was always eager for the future, to chart each new day to his making alongside his beloved companions, sentiment like that held deeper implications then she might've imagined.

While she had succeeded in getting him flustered out of his damn mind at the time, the scrambled energy was more courageous with the calm afterwards. "Since I tend to play for keeps."

"...And keeping you by my side? I'll turn this whole universe upside down for that."

Allowing that admittance to break into the material realm was proper. It was a sign of devotion that he intends to show her with action, time and time again. These were the peaceful waves of the soul that crests upon the metaphysical shore for him, sleep finally claiming another underneath its wing as he failed to turn his phone off in any capacity from its positioned perch.

Come the new day? That would be the small surprise waiting, that stubborn looking face of his looking considerably softer, considerably more peaceful as the edge of a light smile adorns those lips as the crowned piece. Even the noises of Welt's baritone voice and touches of March 7th's chipper desires for breakfast echoes mildly within the halls.

For a moment, she'd also get to see how a touch of his world operates in kind.

A culmination of their treasures.

@avaere for this stinkin' cute post, cause he's a full on sap for her.

[undead-potatoes]

I wanna ask that question right back! Which of your OCs is most like you? I'm curious!

I thought about this question for like an hour while trying to sleep last night, and all I'll say is don't do deep self reflection exercises in the dark before bed kids

Also this got kinda long, ops 🙈

Much like you (and I'm sure everyone else) I put pieces of myself into all my OCs, intentionally or otherwise, and so they all have bits of me.

I don't know if it's because he's so fresh in my mind, or if it's because I didn't have too much of a plan going in so he just became a natural reflection of me, but Jay is really high up there on the list.

Loud, talkative, jovial, happiest when he's of help to others, solution oriented and takes most unforeseen problems in his stride. But he's also incredibly self-conscious, and terrified of taking up space or being a bother to someone else, often forgoing his own needs bc it's not THAT important, it's fine. Sorry for existing.

He naturally gravitates towards other people's problems and a wish to help them (whether that's welcome or not), but prefers to stick his head in the sand when it comes to dealing with his own shit. When things get bad emotionally he goes into himself, and can become borderline dissociative, just lost to the void.

He's extremely good at finding stuff other people need but can't find, feeding into this need to be helpful. He's bit of a control freak and perfectionist too, and has to stop himself and call it good enough or he'll go on forever (wow look how topical)

I could honestly keep going but this is long enough as it is 🙈 I have no idea how we ended up here but I guess he's my emotional support self-insert blorbo now, bye.

Still, he's his own character. He's much better with people than I am, especially children, and doesn't have Retsuko-levels of rage bubbling right under the surface at all times. He's more manipulative and mischievous, and small grievances bounce off him easier. I only ignore my problems until I have to deal with them, he actively runs away from his. He's more extroverted than me, and doesn't mind big crowds, while they're the bane of my existence. And so on and so forth.

ANYWAYS this somehow turned into the a Jay post, I'm sorry lmao. His character wasn't really planned at all, I just let him grow naturally from the way I played (kinda like with you and your Aeducan), and once I took a step back and looked at him I was like "hold on a minute, this is just me if I was cool and had extra trauma, what the fuck".

Honorable mentions of pillars of my own personality shoved into other characters go to;

Courier May (F3/NV) - So damn angry all the time about everything, much of it useless and a waste of energy, but it's really hard to turn it off.

Nimri Brosca DA:O) - This applied more to younger me, but I can get REALLY ride or die for someone, like to the point where it becomes a major character flaw.

Pomona Hawke (DA2) - Did you eat? Yes? Are you sure? Are you wearing enough layers? When did you last apply sunscreen? Did you remember to drink enough today? [The mother hen questions goes on for another 5 minutes]. Also everything is always my fault somehow.

Sam Jones (VtM:B) - Just absolutely insufferable about social justice, and the other half of my rage that's an answer to injustice. You've not seen me angry until I've had a whiff of something cruelly unfair.

And because I feel like I've been too negative here;

Ridley (Coral Island) - Hard-working and generous :)c

[1111jenx]

How would you describe Lilith in the 1st house/Lilith conjunct ascendant? 🌹

Ofcourse!

As someone who had Lilith 7H, I have met (too) MANY Lilith in the 1st house people😆

Lilith in the 1st house🦇

1st house rules over the body, our physical appearance, our conscious sense of self and our focus in life. Having Lilith present here means the native literally embodies and exudes the truest form of Lilith.

Something about these people awaken others' sexuality. Whether it's good or bad depends on the aspects. Positive aspects indicate others admire, obsessed over these natives' darker energy and even dream about having sexual affairs with them. (TW!!) Negative aspects, esp towards Mars or Pluto can literally mean abusive encounters. Others yearn for their darkness and grow addicted to 1H Lilith people, disregarding Lilith's own intention and free will. It's so fucking sad sometimes.

These people once again, were not bullied when younger, but more like they received way more isolation(?) from people. 7H Lilith suffers as a child because they were criticized for their natural sexuality , mature energy but 1H Lilith simply feels as if they themself were rejected as a whole person. Not just a part of them.

Crippling anxiety, fears of abandonment can be a big theme. May have an extremely complicated relationships with sex, physical appearance, and personal expression.

Their mother/a parental figure may have been hard on them. This parental figure might have been extra harsh on 1H Lilith natives. They may have been shamed for their sexual preference, their sex life, their appearance and even how they come off by their own parents. Therefore, these natives sometimes feel "unlovable".

They tend to stay close to what they already knew pretty well rather than diving into the unknown. (but a part of them will always willing to go to the extreme)

DEFENSIVE. DONT CRITICIZE THEM FOR THEIR FEELINGS. be there for them only.

People literally want to fuck them. I'm so serious it's horrifying sometimes. People simply want to have a taste of them, to let their "darkeness" consume them even though there are no emotional attraction whatsoever . These people(Lilith 1H) are aware of this. They can subconsciously feel it or may have even experienced a good amount of incidents as such to realize this sad reality. This is why they tend to act very cold, detached and mean. They push people away. They like to test people because they need to know, do you people love them for who they are or just who they can be in bed.

It sounds very much like a joke but if these people want to be with someone for the long-term. They would hold off the sex. And they should. Let me elaborate, I've seen this happen so many times! This is their ultimate "test". Lilith 1H native would want to see how you're going to handle this, are you feelings for them deep enough to overcome your own primal need? If not, the door is wide open!

Sex with them will get you addicted. You've been warned. Especially when you're emotionally connected to them. You'll keep going back for more and more and more and at one point they'll slowly pull away as they fear you're using them for their bodies only.

Lilith in 1H can't help but struggle when it comes to self love. They spend so much nights turning and twisting their bed sheet wondering if they'll ever find someone who can love them, who is it that is their soulmate? This is especially true if you have Lilith in Libra 1H. They also attract a crazy amount of Pluto/Mars energy into their life.

A need to put on a facade. Growing up, they may have been told that they're only lovable when they act a certain way, or when they present themselves in a certain manner. They resent this yet fear finding out the real answer to whether or not it is true.

Rebels. Pure rebels at heart. Sometimes they just want to break all the rules. Break all the norms.

Developed placements may embrace the rebellious nature of Lilith. Think women who are not afraid of dying their armpits to "prove a point", or men who are not afraid of wearing dresses to go against societal norms. Simply want to send a big fuck you to the universe tbh. Activism can be a big theme. Real fighters when they believe in something.

No one understands pain and trauma like they do. Once they made peace with their Black Moon Lilith, they can become healers who send out guidance for people. Think retired alcoholics at your AA meeting:) I'm joking but not really.

Oh also may have a complex relationship with substance and drugs. They're sooooo prone to finding an "escape" when things get too stressful. This is especially true if the natives already have a lot of negative Neptune aspects in tight orbs!

Most likely to say something extremely mean and offensive but honestly didn't mean it, it was because of "the heat of the moment"

People with this placement all of have some kind of triggers. Not the "icks" but ones that would seriously get them raged up.

Tend to have darker hair or darker eyes. Looks like Scorpio Rising but less about physical appearance but rather more about their "aura".

That's all I can think of right now:) Again please take aspects into consideration for when reading these notes y'all!! Give your Lilith 1H friend a hug LOL

love,

saint jenx🥀

[youforbreakfast]

Why Femdom?

All people have become who they are through a random and confusing sequence of often misinterpreted life experiences including successes and mistakes.

However men, in addition, have carried with them their male sexuality, which is inherently predatory, and often sends stronger commands to the brain than reason.

So strong and independent are these thoughts that it is not inaccurate to think of them as if they are due to the presence of another person or animal that shares the controls. I prefer to personify this rogue entity as the cock-dog. Obviously the cock has no brain, but the entire cock subsystem is a complete, independent, conscious, and highly spirited being much like a big playful dog and untrained dog.

It is the job of the man to maintain control of their actions to fit into society. I'm sure this dog is more trained in some men and less in others. As well, some men have more consciousness than others. You can see the balance in all men upon meeting them.

Meanwhile, women experienced the random sequence of confusing trials and tribulations of life, but without the inner cock-dog to manage, and instead as the target of men's cock attention. Consequently, they have a generally quite different experience of life then men.

Some women, of course, are more conscious than others. And some women have experienced more attention from cocks than others.

Things are interesting when a particularly conscious woman gets together with a particularly conscious male with a particularly hyper cock-dog. Both are keenly aware of the third being - the overactive cock. But the man is burdened with the minute by minute management of the cock that, to his best abilities, is being kept hidden from polite society.

This is where femdom comes in. The conscious, and therefore strong, woman can see through the man's facade of control and see the hyper dog for what it is. She can help the man to take control of the cock, releaving a life-long shift as its sole keeper.

More than likely, the cock needs strict discipline that the man was unable to administer. To a less conscious outsider, this may look like BDSM. But, in fact, each lash on the man's ass is going directly to the misbehaving cock.

The woman knows that the man has made many deals with his cock to keep it at bay - looking at porn, looking at women, constant masturbation, rubbing and touching. All these things are done to keep the cock from taking over the controls resulting in great embarrassment.

The woman knows that a tight steel chastity cage is the number one way to get the cock's attention off the man and give him some relief. Once caged, the cock realizes that relief can only come from the woman. This changes the entire dynamic instantly.

A good whipping tightly bound to the bench is a tremendous acknowledgement that the woman understands the entire situation. She is acknowledging that the cock has been poorly trained. Yes, the man bears some responsibility. And the cock needs to learn some discipline. The whole scene is the ultimate intimacy that brings the couple closer than ever.

Orgasm control is critical to getting the cock to behave. When the cock can get stroked by the host man, it's needs are mostly met for a while. But then it has no incentive to motivate the man to please the woman. Orgasm control takes this cheat our of the equation. Now the cock's energy can be directed to a greater good. Like the motivation to romance the woman, or worship her pussy with his tongue.

Cum feeding is an important feedback to remind the man of the control the cock has over him. When the man is made horny by the cock, it changes his reason. The conscious woman can offer the cock an orgasm in exchange for the man to eat the cum. His cock will convince his reason that it is okay, and that he craves it and will enjoy it. But after the orgasm, the cock will betray him. The woman is there to feed each spoon of cum to the man and ensure he makes good on his promises to beg for each spoonful and thank her. The man becomes fully aware of how he was manipulated by the cock as he forces himself to beg and thank the woman for each discusting spoon of cum.

Femdom is the ultimate intimacy between two conscious adults and their out-of-control cock.

[rainbowsky]

Hello RainbowSky hope you're doing ok, thx for all you do! I just saw a YT video showing GGDD's license plates?? Is this true? XZ has WYB's b'day as his license, WYB has 16-23 as his? WILD IF TRUE but I don't trust YT! Also... what do you think of the Kadian stuff? It seems like a lot of trouble for them to go through and some looks like corporate decisions but... OTOH sometimes it looks obvious? IDK what to make of it.

Anonymous 2 asked:

Hello Rainbowsky! First of all, love your blog, love you, keep doing your thing and being amazing!! I was wondering if you'd seen the license plate candy? It's a picture of GG entering a car (supposedly his car) and the license plate reads [redacted] and it doesn't... look photoshopped?? BUT LIKE it's too good to be true, right?? Wouldn't this just be too much??? My heart wants to believe it but my brain tells me I'm being too gullible. Please help me take off this clown wig (or don't). xxx

Thanks for your kind words, Anons!!

I view the license plates of the cars they drive in as private information, so I would never pursue an answer to this question. Even if it was proved to be true, it's not significant to me. Cute, I guess? But not something I'd get very invested in.

I know I say that a lot - "I'm not very invested in it" - and maybe some of you get annoyed when I say that, or wonder what I mean.

What I mean by that is... a lot of turtles seek out signs and evidence that GGDD are together. That pursuit becomes a huge part of their experience of fandom, and it consumes a lot of their time and energy. When a proof seems real they get a huge endorphin rush, and when a candy is washed they plunge into anxiety and despair.

That's not at all how I live as a fan. I don't really seek that sort of thing out, I don't take much interest in it and I don't let it influence my day to day life. I don't make a lot of bluster about signs and candies.

It's not because I have some 'superior' way of being a fan or something. This just my own personal approach based on my personality and where I'm at as a fan. Some of that is because I already believe BJYXSZD (and therefore don't need proofs), but mostly it's just because I prefer to enjoy GGDD rather than ride a rollercoaster or 'build a case'. If candies come, they come. If they don't, that's OK too.

Most candies, even if they are real, don't really say anything about GGDD or their relationship. Like this license plate thing. What difference does it really make if they have personalized kadian license plates? Does it tell me anything interesting that I didn't already know? Not at all.

GG's choice to leave DD's name in his recent snacks video is infinitely more interesting to me. He would have had to have made a conscious choice to do so. He knew what was said because he reacted to it.

That tells me that he is willing to take some risks to show a connection with DD. It tells me that he's not trying to hide the fact that DD is a part of his life. It tells me that he's either getting more reckless or more bold, or both.

So when it comes to 'candy' or 'signs' I'm just more interested in things that give me new information or expand on or confirm what I already suspect. A license plate isn't interesting to me. It feels a bit stalkerish, and even if confirmed it really doesn't tell me anything new. I can look at their public posts for kadian without feeling like I'm invading their privacy.

Edit: More on this here.

[marshmallow-xphile]

My thoughts on the sexuality of some of my favorite X-files characters.

I posted this in my X-files amino back in June as part of a LGBTQ pride challenge and for some reason I only just thought to post it here as well.

Fox Mulder: openly bisexual

Mulder is so open sexually that I really don't think gender matters all that much to him. He does seem to prefer females but I wouldn't be even remotely surprised if he had a boyfriend or two in the past. I don't think he's flamboyant about his sexuality but I don't think he'd hide it at all either

My evidence:

In the season one episode "Ghost in the Machine" we meet an Mulder's ex-partner, Jerry, and I absolutely feel like there is an ex-lovers vibe to the both of them. They hug upon first seeing each other, Mulder looks incredibly happy to see him, when Mulder says they worked together Jerry corrects him to say they were partners at which point Mulder looks over at Scully as if to see her reaction. Mulder has this real guilty look to him. When Jerry acts a little self conscious Mulder is real quick to jump in and reassure him. They get in each other's personal space. It just really leaves me with the impression that they care deeply for one another and broke up for other reasons, perhaps the different career goals as Mulder tells Scully.

We also have Mulder with Krycek. From the very beginning of Krycek's involvement with the X-files I feel like the writers went out of their way to make a correlation between the change in partnership and a new partner in a relationship. There is a scene in Sleepless where Mulder and Scully are on the phone and Mulder tells Krycek he'll be right there, the rest of the conversation feels reminiscent of two exes chatting about the change brought about by the new relationship. Scully even brings up that it must be nice having a partner who doesn't question his every theory.

There were many scenes in Sleepless, Duane Barry, and Ascension in which Mulder and Krycek were alone but that we never got to see who knows for example what the two of them got to talking about while they were stuck in traffic during the drive to New York in Sleepless. Or how often they hung out between Sleepless and Duane Barry.

During Mulder and Scully's partnership Mulder only called her 'Dana' on a few emotional occasions. He started casually calling Krycek 'Alex' almost immediately.

Let us not forget the infamous speedo scene. While yes it definitely showed more of a Krycek attraction to Mulder than the opposite. It does make one wonder what led him to wear such a revealing bathing suit. How many straight men do you know who wear speedos? My guess is few. How many straight men wear speedos when they can reasonably assume their male partner will show up looking for them? Not many would be guess.

And then there is their relationship after Krycek is revealed to be a traitor. They both tend to act more like scorned lovers than enemies and notice that it's Mulder, not Krycek, who cannot seem to keep his hands off the other. Seriously it's like every time Krycek shows up, Mulder immediately grabs him.

Now here's a couple quotes from Mulder,

Krycek tells Mulder he most be losing it because Krycek beat him with one hand. Mulder's immediate reaction: "isn't that how you like to beat yourself?"

When the little man in Humbug is lined up pretty much exactly with Mulder's crotch he says that Mulder would be surprised how many women find his size alluring. Mulder's immediate reaction: "you'd be surprised how many men do as well"

How many straight guys do you know comfortable enough with their sexuality to make a gay innuendo? I personally cannot think of any.

Dana Scully: bicurious

I believe that Scully is sometimes attracted to women. It definitely is not as blatant as with Mulder and I really don't think she's had any past girlfriends but I definitely think that there is an attraction.

My evidence:

In the episode "Ice" I really felt like there are a few tender moments between her and Felicity Huffman's character especially while they were examining one another for the worms. That examination had a sort of sexual energy to it I thought.

In the episode "kill switch" theres a moment where the Invisagoth asked if she could have her handcuffs removed or if she should type with her tongue. Mulder mentions that she doesn't want a vote there and the look on Scully's face and the way she licks her lips, I definitely get the impression that she would have been perfectly happy to see what Invisagoth could get up to with that tongue.

Some people point to Scully's relationship with Reyes as evidence of her bisexuality, I personally don't see any attraction there on Scully's side but I don't think its outside the realm of possibility.

Monica Reyes: Closeted lesbian

This one's probably a surprise I know there was something between here and Brad as well as a flirtation with Doggett so you would probably think she was Bisexual but honestly was either one of those even remotely convincing? To me they weren't. I believe that Reyes is a lesbian.

I kind of go back and forth on whether she's open about it. Reyes is very spiritual and open so it seems strange that she would be in the closet but maybe she has a reason, fear of it affecting her career in the FBI perhaps? It just seems strange that she keeps pursuing these heterosexual relationships she has no passion for unless she is trying to hide her true passion.

My evidence:

I admit I really have very little evidence but look at the relationship between Reyes and Brad Follmer. It had all the chemistry of two people who got really drunk once and cannot remember sleeping together. I don't for a second believe she was ever in love with Brad nor he in love with her.

Then you've got the same thing between her and Doggett. Yes the writers were obviously trying for a romantic angle with the two of them but to me it never came across as convincing. It seemed more like she thought of him as a good friend and figured she might as well date him, I saw no evidence of love or attraction.

On the other hand look at her and Scully. While I feel like the attraction there was one sided I definitely feel like Reyes was into Scully or Dana as she would call her. Reyes was willing to risk her life for Scully and yes that is her job after all but Reyes seems to take that above and beyond and it's not just Scully herself but also William. Look at how protective Reyes is of William in The Truth and of the sacrifice Scully made in giving him up. She seems to care even more than Mulder on that.

Cigarette-Smoking-Man: Asexual

CSM has probably had sex at some point, he is of course the father of at least three children but I do not think that he was ever in love with any of these women or even attracted to them. I believe they were all just a means to an end.

I believe that CSM's only love was for his cigarettes

Evidence:

There is a little bit of evidence that he might have actually felt something for Teena Mulder but I don't buy it. He freely admits that he felt nothing for Cassandra Spender but he must've been convincing if he got her to marry him and we have seen him fake emotions more than once. He also seemed to show an attraction to Scully in En Ami but that too was just a means to an end. Perhaps he does feel something towards all the women he has impregnated but I wouldn't call it love. I don't see any real attraction there either. My bet is that CSM needed some "help" in order to produce his offspring.

Alex Krycek: Gay

While Krycek did have an obviously sexual relationship with Marita Covarrubias he definitely didn't have any real feelings for her and I don't buy attraction either. No I'd say they were both just trying to use sex to get what they wanted. His anger at finding the Russian boy gone wasn't because he was heartbroken at her betrayal. Merely mad that she'd managed to get the upper hand.

Whether Krycek is open or in the closet I'm not sure, I'm thinking it probably depends on the mission hes on at the time.

Evidence:

Of everyone on this list I'd say Krycek is the one I'm the most sure of. There is no doubt in my mind that Krycek was attracted to, perhaps even in love with, Fox Mulder. From the very beginning there appeared to be a bit of longing in his eyes.

There was the speedo scene wherein Krycek was definitely checking Mulder out. There were several scenes where Krycek could've killed Mulder but chose to help him instead.

As I've seen pointed out before, Krycek's crazy motivational choices don't make any sense at all unless it's all in an effort to be around Mulder more.

Look at his sense of style and his obvious love for lip gloss. I am not saying that straight men cannot love lip gloss and dress themselves in Krycek's fashion but it is uncommon and it was especially so back in the 90s

The infamous kiss in The Red and the Black could certainly be explained away as some kind of Russian custom but it isn't one that I am aware of and he hasn't really shown any other signs of his Russia heritage.

I would say my best evidence of Krycek's sexuality is in Essence and Existence, just look at the look on Krycek's face when Mulder trusts him to protect Scully. Krycek knows what Scully means to Mulder and then look at how seriously Krycek takes the job! I definitely feel like that moment meant a lot to him and he would have protected Scully with his life for Mulder.

There's also the fact that Krycek's unwillingness to kill Mulder lead to his own death.

Of course asking Skinner to shoot Mulder goes against this theory but I do have a couple thoughts on that, the most sensical being that he knew there was no chance Skinner would shoot Mulder and he probably knew there was no chance he would survive anymore. Maybe he made that request in hopes of sparing Mulder any pain he might have otherwise felt at his death (I know it's a bit of a stretch but my other theories require a long explanation of my thoughts on where the series had planned to go next)

The lone gunmen: no one knows....not even them

Three (I don't count Jimmy for this) single adult men who all live together in very cramped quarters and are, at least in Langley's case, perfectly happy to be around each other without thier clothes on certainly makes it seem like there's something between them all but I really don't get a overtly gay impression with any of them, even Langley who as mentioned doesn't like to wear pants and is the only one who hasn't had a love interest. They just have this sort of Vegas-esque thing. "What happens in the bachelor pad/newspaper room stays in the bachelor pad/newspaper room.

I would love to hear other people's thoughts on these and any other X-files characters you think might be somewhere on the LGBTQ spectrum.

[lovemesomesurveys]

Do you get nervous before “meeting the parents”? Yeah.

What do you think of your friends? --

What do you prefer to drink in the morning? I don't know what's going on with me, but I don't have coffee everyday anymore like I had been for as long as I can remember. I still have my caffeine everyday, but it's just odd not always starting my day with coffee. I don't have my nightly bowl of ramen anymore either, so I'm all out of sorts these days.

Have you ever done ecstacy? Nooo.

Do you like painkillers? I like when they do their job. I take them as part of my pain management regimen.

What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex? Haaaa. I have nothing alluring about me whatsoever. I'm a true hot mess express.

Do you own a knife? No.

Top 3 thoughts at this exact moment: How I should be asleep right now, what I want for breakfast, and health related things (I'm always thinking about that). Ugh, I couldn't even keep a decent sleep schedule for longer than like a week before I started falling off yet again. It's almost 8AM...

Name five drinks you regularly drink: Water, soda, and milkshakes are my current regulars. Apart from that, I have coffee or a Starbucks energy drink tossed in there sometimes. Though, like I said, I haven't been drinking coffee as much these days. Oh, I have hot chocolate and tea sometimes, too.

What time did you wake up today? I haven't gone to bed, yet, but I should try to get a couple hours at least before my church's live stream service starts.

Current hair? A short, choppy mess.

Current worry? Health stuff as always. And my life in general.

Current hate? Damn allergies have been really kicking my ass. I have the dry cough that I hear many have been experiencing as well that has lasted for weeks and I also suffer from mucus/phlegm buildup and post nasal drip stuff sometimes, which really sucks. Sigh.

Favorite place to be? At home, the beach/relaxing vacay, and Disneyland.

Least favorite place to be? Any type of doctor appointment and crowded places (I make an exception for Disneyland, but I do still get very irritable and anxious). I don't really like being out anywhere because I'm just super self-conscious, insecure and uncomfortable with my appearance. My health scare a couple weeks ago caused some weight loss and I'm already too underweight. I can't bear looking at myself as it is and now it's even worse.

Where would you like to go? I want my own beach house with private beach area.

What do you think you’ll be in 10 yrs? I can't even go there. I have enough to focus on in the here and now. The future honestly terrifies me.

Last thing you ate? A chocolate covered wafer.

Last time you had an alcoholic drink? Close to a decade ago now.

What were you doing 12AM last night? I was eating and watching YouTube videos.

Do people get shocked by how old you are? I don't think shocked, but people have said they thought I was younger than I am.

Do you have any features that people notice right away? As in a mole on your cheek, or a big nose, big teeth, etc? I'm sure there's several things, like a lot of my insecurities. Most notably how thin I am. That one you definitely can't miss.

Where is the last person you kissed at this moment? I have absolutely no idea. I haven't even seen or talked to him in over 5 years.

Will tomorrow be better then today? Today is still quite young so we'll have to see how the rest of the day goes.

Have you ever fallen asleep with the last person you kissed? No.

Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden? No. Also, if I wanted to drink I wouldn't have to sneak around.

Have you ever kissed someone whose name started with a: J, M, C, L, B, A? J.

Do you think you’re wasting your time on the person you like? There's no such person currently. In fact, there hasn't been in like 6 years.

Ever kissed a brown eyed and brown haired person? Yes.

Are you a player? No.

Is there something you want to tell someone? Yes and no. What are you excited for? Nothing.

Is something bothering you? Of course there is, when isn't there?

Do you like the town you are living in? No.

Does your best friend approve of the last person you kissed? She liked him. This was years ago, though. I have no idea if he's changed at all and obviously things didn't work out for us, so.

Do you have any friends with kids? I don't have any friends, but a lot of Facebook "friends" have kids.

Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night? My mom.

Do you miss someone right now? I always will.

Do you hate when people smoke around you? **It's the next day now from when I started this, just putting that out there** Ugh, yes. It honestly makes me feel so sick when people smoke cigarettes around me.

Have you held hands with anyone in the past 24 hours? No.

Think a lot before you fall asleep? Yes. I think a lot all the time. My mind is always going and it's such a jumbled mess.

What was the last thing you spent your money on? A couple of Frosty's from Wendy's last night.

Be honest, who is the easiest person in your life to talk to? My mom and brother.

Your last kiss, were you dating that person at the time? No.

Were you single last summer? Yes.

What’s the weather like outside? It's a sunny 64F.

Is the last person you kissed older than you? No, he's a year younger.

Where did you first kiss the last person you kissed? In the parking lot of a restaurant after my friend's birthday dinner.

Name three things you did or are going to do today: So far I've just taken my medicine, drank some water, and checked any notifications I had on various things.

Let’s say you were ten years old again, what would be a typical day for you? Playing outside and on the computer.

Last place you went besides your house? Wal-Mart.

Is there someone you’d really like to hang out with and just talk about stuff? My grandma. She passed away almost 20 years ago, but we were very close and a LOT sure has happened in that amount of time. I miss spending time and talking with her. Also, I can't believe it's been that long omg...

What was the worst feeling you last felt? It was hitting me hard last night again just how weak and useless I am. I'm just so exhausted and drain and I don't do even do shit. It takes very little to take so much out of me. I have to rely so heavily on others now for like everything. It's very frustrating and hard and it sucks.

How long have you been sober? I haven't had any alcohol in almost 10 years.

Last sexual experience? Never.

How often do you talk on the phone? Not often at all, and when I do they're very brief conversations like my mom or brother calling to ask or tell me something.

Do you have a significant other at the moment? No.

If no, do you want one? No.

Do you “go out” a lot? No, definitely not. I'm at home majority of the time.

Do you work a lot? I don't work at all.

What did you do last night? Went grocery shopping, had dinner, and watched Moon Knight.

When the phone rings who do you want it to be? I don't want any phone calls.

Do you still talk to your exes? No.

What is your current favorite song? I don’t have one. I don't listen to music much anymore for some reason.

Current Best Friend? My mom.

Whats the BEST part of your life right now? I'm just so thankful for my family for everything they have and continue to do for me and I know I'm very blessed to have them. I couldn't go through all this shit without them.

Are you a good girlfriend/boyfriend? I wouldn't be and that's one of the reasons why it's best I'm single.

What happened at 10:00 AM? I was asleep.

Who was the first person you talked to today? My brother.

Will you be in bed within twenty minutes? I am in bed.

When will be the next time you text someone? *shrug*

How do you feel about your hair right now? I hate it.

Who do you currently have texts in your inbox from? Majority now are just my mom and brother.

What color was the last pill you took? White.

How many windows are open on your computer? Two.

What are you doing after this? Eat some of this cherry and cheese danish, scroll through Tumblr, and watch YouTube videos.

[genshin-obsessed]

hi pocket! moth here, and as promised, i'm giving you word after word after word after word....

i got cicada to type some stuff down too since he also wanted to send something to you in congratulations!! <3 <3

----moth

congratulations on 6k! you're really rad and i genuinely think that you deserve all this support and love, it's just really nice to see that you've progressed so quickly and smoothly! you've put a ton of effort into things your write, your events, everything! your interactions with your anons are just so nice, and that's all because you're an amazing person!

when i joined the genshin fandom, you were one of the first blogs that i had run into, and that's pretty neat. at first, i didn't follow you, since i wasn't really used to your writing. but as i kept on encountering your works, i eventually grew accustomed to it- and i like your writing style! v swag :)

your oc, toxin, is just- perfection. i like the whole background thing, powers, but the fic i liked the most was the one where toxin attempts to poison you. my imagination can just run wild from there, picturing out what the character did after running out to go after toxin, but for zhongli's case how he took care of you + what he did after.

you, pocket, are a wonderful person- if you receive hate, you don't deserve it! 6000 seems like a large accomplishment, and it must've felt really nice to hit that number. a great person like you deserves the world, but the world may not deserve you. your presence alone on tumblr is practically a blessing, and i'm grateful for everything that you've wrote! not only that, but you've helped me become bolder and interact off anon. i think that's pretty neat, genuinely.

i'm sure many others think the same: ilysm(/p) pocket! even if i fall out of the genshin fandom(which i most likely won't bc of XIAOOOOOOOOOOOO <3 <3 <3 <3), i'll still revisit your blog. reading over your works always makes me crack a smile, whether it's angsty or not. your ability to write is amazing, and some of your works had even inspired a few of mine!

a collab with a person like you is like a dream come true. i look forwards to future interactions, and hopefully they're all positive! i support you no matter what, and you can't change that, hehe.

-your local xiao simp,

moth.

----cicada

hello, i believe you've never interacted or heard of me before? i go by cicada online, a friend that appears on moth's blog every now and then. they told me about your 6k followers, and i think that's pretty neat. to be honest when you told moth that you'd do a collab with them i was happy they chose you, since you're a really good person. pocket, thank you so much for everything you've done for me, moth, all of us- i cannot express my gratitude towards you, and i am proud of that because i can usually express my gratitude to others within words. however, since my gratitude towards you is off the charts, i cannot form it in words. regarding the collab, i will attempt to help moth with angst, however my help might not be needed. i thank you deeply, for fueling my everyday energy to get up. reading through your works gives me so much serotonin, and i appreciate that greatly. have a good day or night, perhaps afternoon, mx. pocket.

-cicada.

----any last words before we go sleep?

moth - ily, pocket! /p

cicada - thank you, congratulations. (note: get your well deserved rest, pocket.)

----goodnight, good morning, good afternoon wherever you are ! !

ok so like i genuinely started crying at this and I don't normally get very emotional. You both left me speechless, so that's one of the reasons why I'm taking so long to respond T^T

I'll split my response here to the both of you!

its kinda long- sorry xD also can I just call yall "the bugs" cuz its just so cute ;-; your names are adorable-

Moth, you are such a sweetheart. Like I said earlier, I'm not someone who gets very emotional! But your words brought tears to my eyes (tears of joy ofc) and it took me a while to respond because every time I saw what you'd written, I'd just have this giant smile on my face. I'm really glad you chose to follow me and I'm so happy you chose to talk to me! I always try to be fun and welcoming so that people who do wanna interact can do so, but I get it, there are so many people here it can get daunting.

But I'm glad you reached out! I'm so happy to have a friend like you! Ima be honest, the first few times you sent something in off anon, I was like "o.o they forgot anon-" BUT NOW LOOK AT YOU! Thank you, I really appreciate it. I'm actually pretty self-conscious about my writing but I try to do my best and post- even though I don't like what I've written, so your words really do help me! You're the type of reader every writer wants. Seriously!!

Ah, Toxin! Yes, I've had her as an oc for such a long time and then I finally perfected her! She's been in so many fics of mine and she's finally getting the recognition she deserves!! I'm glad you enjoyed that fic, it's one of my faves! I planned to do a p2 with some other characters but held off cuz I thought people would get bored- yet here you are, sparking my will to write it again!

I still can't believe I hit 6k! Honestly, that's so many people!! and they all like me and my stuff!! it's really hard to believe- there are days I think its a dream >.< silly, I know xD actually, when I first joined tumblr, it was because of BNHA and I saw this writer who had 10k followers at the time and I just was like "that's not even possible" yet here I am- 4k away T^T

I genuinely hope Xiao keeps you here, but if you have to leave for another fandom that's ok too! I can only hope we'll meet once again there too! I think some people in life are meant to be friends and are just meant to know each other! And I'll hope you're one of them! Cuz you're one of the awesomest friends I've had and I love you as well (/p)!! <333

-

Cicada, omg haiii!! I've heard very little about you since Moth took FOREVER to tell me there's another writer hidden back there!! I'm glad I got a chance to talk to you, even if it's like this! I'm not sure how much you know about me >.< seems like a lot so I'm sorry that I don't know that much about you!

Thank you so much, you're so very sweet and I can't express how happy your words made me. For a long time now, I always wake up and wonder how I can make my friends smile or laugh, and now that's extended to this blog. To hear how happy my writing makes people brings me so much joy that even I can't express it. I know there are many people out there who have lots of things to deal with in life and to know that my writing's helping them through that fuels me to write more!

I'm so glad I can do the same for you! We may not know each other- or maybe it's mostly on my end- but I still want to make you smile! I want to make everyone who stumbles upon my blog smile as well! Life can get hard and it feels so impossible sometimes but if I can give someone the energy to go on, then I'm pretty content with my own! Thank you for reading my works and thank you for telling me this because it really did make me happy.

Aw, thank you, I hope it's not too much! Though I specialize in angst (at least, I like to think so), I wanted to give Moth the opportunity to try! I'll do my best to make the fluffiest fluffing comfort you've ever seen!! Or uh something like that ^w^"

I really do hope that you and I can talk more so I can get to know you! Oh! And that google form- it was super adorable ^w^

-

You two are too kind and you best believe I'm saving this lil ask <3 you both very well made my entire week (along with that meme anon with those cute memes) and I'm sending you both hugs!! or cookies ^w^ whichever you prefer!

Also, it was nighttime when you sent this and now its 3am >///< i need sleep-

[iplaymatchmaker]

hello and good day! i would like a matchup for a3! and ikerev, please! she/her pronouns. you can call me juice, though! hm i think a good description of me personality wise would be im usually cheerful, friendly, childish but i tend to hide a lot of my negative feelings and overthink quite a lot. towards others i'm always curious about the littlest details of someone's hobbies or interest and sometimes i talk more than i listen. love literature and things like fashion or games (1)

Hello, thanks for requesting juice! Sorry for the long wait but I hope you enjoy it! I was pretty excited to write a match up for a3! since it’s been living rent free in my head for the last few weeks. I got a little carried away with the last prompt cause it was so fun to write, but I hope you like it! Also, the ikerev one might take some time but I’ll try to not take too long. Have fun!

I match you with

Tsuzuru!

The two of you first meet after you watch one of their plays, “A Clockwork Heart.” When you realize that the lead and writer is a classmate of yours from college you can’t help but approach him a few days later to discuss the play further.

He seems self conscious at first but quickly opens up as the two of you discuss his script and before you know it one conversation has turned into an in-depth discussion over lunch.

After that first encounter, both of you start talking more often, quickly growing closer. Tsuzuru appreciates your cheerful attitude, making it easy for him to be comfortable around you.

Considering your love for literature, you often help him brainstorm for new ideas, always looking forward to seeing how he brings it to life on stage.

It is easy for you to fit in with the rest of the boys from Mankai, despite their constant prying on your relationship with Tsuzuru. After all the time the two of you spend together, it is no surprise when none of the boys (except Azami) bat an eyelash when you make it official, after a lot of back and forth between friendship and romance.

Prompt: Bonding

“The reason S was created in the first place was because Luke needed a companion. It’s tragic that he was the one who left him in the end.”

“Well, yes, but he also taught him to open up to people, insuring that he wouldn’t be alone when he was gone.”

You and Tsuzuru had been discussing the end of his latest play “A Clockwork Heart” for a while, arguing over whether or not the ending was tragic. When you approached him to offer your praise for his work earlier that day you hadn’t been expecting him to engage in your opinions on a play he wrote, but he was actually deeply invested in the conversation, despite the matter at hand being trivial to the actual substance of the story.

“He couldn’t have known though. He also put his own wishes aside to protect him. That alone makes the ending tragic.” You vividly remembered the tears you had shed when the show reached its climax, a result of both his script and his acting.

“It depends on your idea of what the ending was. S was a machine, so as long as Luke was alive they could meet again, when it was safe for the both of them. That makes the ending-“

Ring Ring

You almost chucked at the generic sound his phone made as it vibrated.

“Give me a sec.” he moved away from the bench before answering. It wasn’t long before he returned, a flush expression on his face.

“Sorry, I didn’t realize I had kept you for so long. I actually need to get going.” He ran a hand through his hair, smiling shyly. It was only then that you noticed what time it was.

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to bother you for that long!” Now you were both flushed, the realization dawning on you that you had spent two hours talking.

“I-it’s fine. Um, we can continue this tomorrow, if you’d like?” you were surprised he actually wanted to talk again, a smile spreading over your face.

“Definitely. “

“Okay. See you then!” he waved as he ran off while simultaneously trying to dial someone, resulting in him almost falling on his face. You looked forward to tomorrow.

After that first encounter, you continued to meet during lunch to talk about other works, quickly realizing you had a similar taste in books and movies. It was an easy transition, going from acquaintances to friends.

“How’s the summer troupe’s play coming along?” It was easy to tell that he had been losing sleep again from the – almost – comical black circle under his eyes, but you asked anyway, hoping that you could offer some help.

“I know what I want to write, the words are just refusing to form and settle themselves on the page.” The frustration was evident on his face as he tried to put the pieces flying around his head in order. You tried to think of a way to help him but you knew that he needed to figure this out on his own.

“Come on.” You forcefully pulled him out of his chair, carefully shutting his laptop.

“W-wait. Where are we going?” you pushed him along, despite his protesting.

“Trust me.” You flashed him your biggest smile before setting of, only mildly aware that your hand was still around his wrist.

“The movies?” he seemed confused over what your objective was but you were confident it would help him out of his slump.

“Yes. Come on, I’ll even get us popcorn!” you were beaming as you led him inside.

“What are we watching?” Tsuzuru, finally resigned to his fate, flipped through the leaflet, looking at the moves currently playing.

“Your choice, I’m fine with whatever.” You hurried to the bar to pick up snacks, leaving him at the ticket booth.

“Look at those effects.”

“The acting is top notch.”

Tsuzuru had been so immersed in the movie he seemed to have forgotten all about his tiredness. When you exited the theatre you could practically see the gears turning in his head.”

“It’s a very different take on pirates than the summer troupe’s play, but if I exaggerate the characters even more then there would be great opportunity for comedy.” You couldn’t help the laugh that escaped you as you observed him, completely lost in his own mind.

“So I take it the creative juices are flowing again?” he looked back at you, as if seeing you clearly for the first time in days.

“Yes! Thank you!” He put his arms around you, too far lost in his excitement to feel any awkwardness.

“I-I have to go write! I’ll see you tomorrow.” He continued shouting thank you over his shoulder as he run off with newfound energy. You expected you wouldn’t see him the next day, considering he’d probably be passed out by then, but you smiled anyway.

“See you later!”

Prompt : Cinderella:

“So, you’re thinking of doing Cinderella for the next play?” You and Tsuzuru were hanging out in his room, taking full advantage of Masumi’s absence that weekend.

“Yeah… I’m not sure how to go about it though. Everyone in the Spring Troupe agreed that I should be lead this time around but I just don’t see myself in the shoes of a prince… Itaru would probably be a better fit for the role.” You couldn’t help throwing a pillow his way.

“Hey! What was that for?” You sat up a little straighter, tempted to glare at him until he picked up on your annoyance.

“I can definitely picture you in the role of the prince.” You cleared your throat before switching to your best narrator voice.

A long, long time ago there lived a boy and a girl. They were the best of friends when they were children. The boy would often sneak out to meet with her and they would play for hours. But their happiness would not last long.

You see, the girl grew up to be the maid of one of the less-fortunate royal families in the kingdom. She had been forced into that position by her father’s latest wedding. It would also turn out to be his last, for he died a few years later, leaving her in the care of a wicked stepmother.

One the other hand, the boy grew up to be the most charming prince in the land. The women fawned over him and he always had everything his heart could desire.”

“I’m literally none of those things.”

“Fine then.”

The prince was an idiot who didn’t know how to take care of himself and never asked for help. He constantly worried his friends over his health but they loved him anyway.

“That’s not any better…”

“Shh, let me continue the story.”

Their difference in class ripped the two friends apart, putting an end to their relationship. While they weren’t allowed to meet again, they promised to never forget about each other. To keep that promise, the made matching bracelets and agreed to never take them off until they could meet again.

“Friendship bracelets? Who does that?”

“They were kids! Would you have preferred rings?”

“Wouldn’t those basically be promise rings?”

“I’m coming up with this on the spot, give me a break!”

That bracelet was what gave the girl the strength to continue living, despite her struggles.

When news of a ball arrived at the estate, her step-sisters were quick to start preparations, eager to have a chance at the prince’s hand in marriage. The girl was simply happy at the prospect of seeing her friend again.

When her family found out she was planning to attend the ball, they locked her in the cellar, not willing to risk any competition. The girl wept and wept, until suddenly a kind seeming lady appeared in front of her.

“Isn’t this just the movie?”

“Give it a second!”

The lady promised she would help her get to the ball if that was what she wished. Despite her suspicions, the girl earnestly declared that all she wanted was to see her friend again. And so the kind woman flicked her wrist and the rags the girl had been wearing were replace by a rich ball gown, paired with a glass slippers. The girl thanked her again and again before heading off in search of her lost friend.

“She doesn’t warn her about the time limit?”

“There’s no curfew here, it’s a stupid conflict anyway.”

You couldn’t contain the excitement and adrenaline that flowed through you as you went up the steps of the grand palace. You hadn’t been here since you were a child, when the king’s father still allowed you to visit, and childhood memories flooded your mind. It was difficult to keep your nerves at a reasonable level as you approached the guards at the front gate. By the time you had arrived at the palace, most of the guests were already inside, so you were completely alone when you handed the invitation, hoping the witch had done her work well.

“Enjoy your evening.” They smiled before urging you to step inside. A sense of awe filled you as you walked through the somewhat familiar halls, remembering all the places you and Tsuzuru would hide from the servants, before his title meant anything to you.

You weren’t sure you remembered the way to the main hall, so you followed the noise, hoping you could make your way there.

When you finally stood outside what seemed to be the entrance, you took a few deep breaths before walking forward, determined to see your friend again. When you stepped though the door you quickly realized that the door wasn’t the room’s main entrance, but the top of the grand staircase. Dread filled you as everyone’s eyes fell on you. If it wasn’t for the railing you thought you have fainted right then and there. You breathed in, allowing you hand to wrap around the bracelet the two of you had made so long ago, letting the warm feelings it carried spread through you.

You bowed once before making your way down the stairs, hoping you wouldn’t trip on your dress and make a fool of yourself before the night even started.

The moment you were off the last step, your eyes fell on your step-mother, eyeing you with absolute envy and disgust. You hoped the mask would be enough to conceal your identity.

You walked around the room for a bit, keeping to the less populated areas, hoping to catch a glimpse of Tsuzuru, disappointed to find that he was nowhere to be found.

“Please let this not be for nothing…”

You were about to make your way to the balcony, but a swarm of guests was suddenly in your path, dancing to the waltz the band had just started playing. You frantically looked around, searching for a way out when two arms wrapped around you, pulling you along with the rest of the dancers.

“I guess you’re my partner?” the face of the man that stood before you made your jaw drop. You had thought of so many things to say, but now that Tsuzuru was standing before you, the words seemed to catch in your throat.

“So, uh, are you having fun?” he was as awkward as you remembered. Something about the familiarity filled you with a sense of calm. I found him.

“I am now.” It was hard to contain the smile quickly spreading around your face.

“Actually I was-“that was when it was time to switch partners. When you felt his hand slip from yours, panic flooded through you. No… I didn’t have the chance to tell him.

As he pulled his hand away, his fingers brushed the bracelet on your wrist, eyes widening as he was whisked away by another partygoer, realization evident in his features. You tried to get closer, but were quickly taken away by another guest. Your eyes landed on Tsuzuru a few times but the hall was too crowded. It was almost suffocating. You took the first chance to slip out on the balcony, eager to get away from the crowds.

You stood at the railing, letting the air cool down your heated face. He had seen you, but you weren’t sure he would care enough to search. Negative thoughts occupied your mind as you gazed at the land beyond. Maybe this was foolish… He probably barely remembers me… He’s a prince after all. He was more important matter to attend to than a peasant he used to spend his free time with. You felt tears gathering at the corners of your eyes, your own loneliness catching up with you.

“Please don’t cry!” You were shocked to find Tsuzuru standing a few feet away from you, his face flushed and his knees bent. He must’ve been running.

“You’re the girl from back then, aren’t you?” he glanced down at your wrist, pulling up his own sleeve to reveal a bracelet identical to yours.

“Y-you kept it.” Your voice cracked, barely audible in the midst of the ongoing celebrations.

“Of course I did! It meant a lot to me.” The words seemed to call to something inside you and so you let the tears fall.

“W-what did I do? Please don’t cry!” he took a step closer, still unsure of what boundaries existed between you.

“I-I can’t help it. I’m just so happy!” you wrapped your arms around him, not caring who saw you. All that mattered in that moment was that the two of you were reunited at last.

“I missed you.” You couldn’t see his face, but you could tell he was crying too, by the way his heart beat against your, the way his hands shook, still wrapped around you in a tight embrace. Year’s worth of loneliness and regret spilled out of the both of you in a single moment.

You stayed like that for quite some time, allowing the relief to wash over you. When you looked at each other again, you couldn’t help but laugh at your state. You knew the scene must look ridiculous to any outside spectators, but none of them mattered. It felt like you were alone in the world, no barriers between you. Your class didn’t matter. You were just a boy and a girl who had been reunited.

“ The king was skeptical at first, knowing a commoner queen wouldn’t create any new alliances, but he could see the love his son had for the girl. And so they married. It’s said that the pair practically run down the stairs of the palace after their wedding, eager to get to their honeymoon, their laughter echoing through the streets.”

“That’s an ending befitting a prince Muku reads about in manga… I still don’t see where I fit into this… ”

“Fine. As they descended the staircase, the prince fell on his ass, causing even more laughter from the girl. A moment she would never let him forget.” You couldn’t help but laugh at the earnest look on Tsuzuru’s face. He may be clumsy, but he has always been kind.

“It will need a lot modifications, especially considering the fact that none of us can exactly pull off female roles, but it could work.” At some point through the story Tsuzuru seemed to have pulled out a notebook, in which he was now scribbling away.

“Are you seriously taking notes?” he was still focused on the story, not letting the inspiration go to waste.

“Of course I am. You’re brilliant!” he pulled you in for a kiss, taking you completely by surprise.

“You’re the best.” He turned back to his note taking, leaving you with flushed cheeks and a bright smile.

“You too.”

And they lived happily ever after.

[neoculturetechxgot7]

Gardenia on the crown - J.J.H.

2; Sun kissed gardens

pairing: Jung Jaehyun × Reader

genre: angst

length: around 2k words

warnings: profanity

``

The distance from the ballroom to the gardens is fairly short, having to cross only a few wide halls buzzing with the usual morning preparations as maids and servants swiftly moved around with hasty steps.

You're surprised to soon find yourself crossing a large patio paved with thick, grey gravel to reach what the king said to be the countryard, where a seemingly endless sea of green spread under the skyline. Without wasting a moment, you follow both elders as they begin making their way between big, voluminous bushes and blooming flowers covering each side of the stone path.

It seems to be more of a maze than a garden, its complicated spirals of greenery pushing you to the brim of dizziness, constant turns killing your sense of direction. At this point, it's a fact that you'd get lost if left alone in there.

The sky is clear and gifts you a generous supply of sun beams, which you presume to be nature's way of sympathizing with your new reality, trying to provide the slightest comfort. It's hard to enjoy even that though, with Jaehyun by your side. At least he makes sure to keep more than enough distance and you feel internally grateful for his understanding of personal space.

You steal a brief glance on your right where he strolls carelessly, hands in the pockets of his dress pants like a gentleman. Glaring far into the horizon, he seems to have retreated into his own thoughts which causes you to feel a little more relaxed, knowing he isn't intently watching your every move.

The sudden urge to run away almost overpowers you when his eyes, pink and purple lavender mirroring in their depths, lock with yours and embarrassment pierces through you so brutally. Once again, your cheeks probably get more blush than any rose in the entire palace as you quickly snap your head to the other side.

He literally just caught you staring.

But there is nothing wrong with that, right? He is your husband-to-be after all...

Thanfully, Jaehyun doesn't comment anything, only leaves a blanket of silence drape over you and the bold decision of looking at anything but him takes a good seat in the back of your head.

Thankfully, the plants around you can provide a great distraction as you get fascinated by their vivid colours and freshness, early dew still sliding off of velvety petals and leaves. They aren't as Iively as those back home nor is there as much variety, but still it remains a pretty sight.

What really catches your attention though are a few snowy white blooms emerging from a plush bush beside the path and your heart flutters, inevitably drawn to them. Ducking with golden satin pooling around your ankles, your fingers reach out to pluck one and the next moment you're burying your nose to deeply inhale in the beautiful scent that makes fairies dance on the crisp air.

You love it. That's why you can't bare to avert your gaze, instead standing over the plants as if you can somehow escape in their dreamy world, wiping tiny droplets from their surface to feel the coolness of morning.

"Gardenia." A voice comes from behind and you quickly realise it's Jaehyun, his heavy footsteps growing louder as he approached.

"I know." You reply, almost allowing a chuckle past your lips. "My mother adores them. She says it takes a lot of care for these to grow."

"We do take care of them here." There is a tone of pointing out the obvious lacing his words as he halts before the flowers and slowly leans to sniff one.

"You take care of them?" You ask with a finger pointing at him, genuinely curious to know if the prince of ice has a soft spot for gardening after all.

"No, of course not. Servants do." Jaehyun explains nonchalantly and, after looking back at the path, gestures for you to follow, since both your parents have already moved way ahead.

The hint of enthusiasm in your chest is quickly crashed by his answer and once again it feels so unbearably cold to be around him, an imaginary yet sturdy wall built between you two. He continues walking, completely ignoring the uneasiness being alone with him causes you.

You wish to rush to your father's side, hide under his wing and plea to stop the marriage, but your pride and unbending sense of responsibility leaves you simply scurrying to catch up.

You don't trade any other words as he continues pretending oblivion to your existence and you begin hating even the slightest idea of him, burning with desire for all of this mess to end.

♤

A torturous amount of time later, your heels are digging into the expensive burgundy carpet decorating a high staircase leading up to what the king said to be your royal chambers. You can't wait to go up these steps and sink in the peace and quiet of a well-made bed. Privacy and some time alone is all you need to put the tornado of incomprehensible thoughts racking your mind in order.

And while you're daydreaming about soft pillows and the chilling touch of cotton sheets, Jaehyun's father keeps on with his relentless ramble regarding the wedding, which, from what you understood, will be held under the next full moon, in about a month from now.

It then dawns on you how, truly, you have only 25 days before you allow that awful prince to slide a band of polished platinum on your ring finger and tie your lives together in eternity. Then, as the unwritten laws of the ancient proclaimed, you'd be inseparable.

Fuck all of this.

Screaming and shouting until the moon itself tears in half seems like a tempting option to let out the despair now nibbling at every inch of you skin. Hatred and so much fury boils in your bloodstream, especially after your gaze lands on your betrothed, who was eyeing you back, possibly with raw dislike.

You realize now that, really, you despise him.

He's standing just a step below, too close for your lungs to breathe freely but close enough for your nails to claw at his eyes and-

"...and the ceremony will take place at the palace, before the grand feast..." The hoarsennes of the king's voice scratches your ears almost cruelly.

You can't stand hearing whatever shit is coming out his mouth, already way past your breaking point. You can't take it anymore, you can't wait for him to finish that annoying monologue.

Your fingers start to tremble ever so slightly, golden rings clashing inaudibly against each other.

You don't want to hear anything else about that damned wedding, the upcoming end of life as you know it, and right now all you can think about is how to reach your room as soon as possible.

Then, a god-sent idea flashes before your conscious, dramatic yet somehow good, the distress in your eyes replaced by glimmering relief.

If this works, you'll be in the security of a spacious room within seconds, away from the overwhelming royals and their annoying chit-chat.

A soft gasp falls from your parted lips and a hand shot up to your forehead, knees bending slightly.

"Sweetheart, are you okay?" Your dad's concern coated tone sends traces of guilt to crawl under your skin.

"Yes, I'm just feeling a little dizzy, father." You whine, sounding pathetic nonetheless, leaning towards his embrace for support.

"Do you need me to call the maids?"

Your inevitably gaze shoots to Jaehyun's father eyeing you, awaiting your answer.

"No, no, it's alright. I'd prefer to retreat from your company, though." You mentally cringe at the immerse politeness you're forced show when in reality all you long to say is a simple fuck off, all of you.

So your plan might be...really pitiful at its execution after all. You aren't sure if anyone will believe your pretentious groan of pain and the helpless tone, but even so, who can refuse a princess a such simple request?

"The sun. Its probably the heat that's caused this, my Lady." The unbothered king points out, without a single drop of regret in his voice for having you wander around the entire garden under the searing licks of sunshine.

And then, fingertips scorch a tight grasp around your wrist making you flinch, eyes darting daggers at Jaehyun who is taking a step forward to tower over you, blaze adorning his gaze.

"Are you sure you're alright, princess?" His other hand snakes its way around your waist so smoothly, fingers squeezing waves of newfound heat against your side.

You can burst any moment now and slap that pretty face of his that's now only a breath away as he pulls you ever so slightly towards his chest.

If you had a fake headache before, it's a certain fact that a real one is starting to pulse inside your head at right now.

"Guards!" The king loudly calls for the two men in light armor standing on either side of the base of the stairs and they hurry away from their positions to approach you. "Take her highness to her royal chambers immediately."

You'd be glad to be escorted by them, followed by the soft clatter of iron as you head for the comfort of your apartments, away from that stupid prince.

But apparently Jaehyun isn't about to allow that luxury, when he throws a sharp nod to stop them dead on their tracks.

"I got her."

No, no, no, no. Damnit, no.

You can barely contain your body's reaction to violently wiggle out of his grip and pick up your skirts to bolt away, not giving a shit about manners at this point. Being almost pressed flush with his body strangely drains you of energy and clouds your mind with a heavy daze, sensing his every warm inhale brush against your neck.

"Father, please continue without us."

You don't make it to hear what the others mumble -probably their farewells- as he spins you around, palm moving lower on the small of your back to support it, although it's really not necessary. If it weren't for his tight hold though, you would've fallen flat on your face after tripping on the first step, the clumsiness striking you yet again.

"Do you need me to carry you?" He leans to whisper in your ear, freezing you in place at the proximity and his spine-chilling touch.

You are somewhat disgusted. His concern is probably nothing more than sugar-coated pretence.

"No, I'm okay. I can do this alone." That's all you manage to blurt out, insides lit on ruby fire as you try to move away hopelessly.

Even so, his bony fingers don't loosen up. "There's only a few steps left."

His voice rings faintly, because everything around you except him seems to disintegrate into a blur and you melt painfully slow into his unwanted embrace. The erratic heartbeat thumping on your temples is louder than gunshots at this point, making you wonder if he can hear it so clearly too.

Jaehyun's scent of sandalwood and rosemary has a shaky breath hitch at your throat so painfully, overpowering all your senses in a feverish way.

You curse at your impatience, regretting not waiting for the king to end the annoying palace tour and bidding all three men goodbye to find your room all alone. Yes, that would've been perfect compared to the current situation.

Your whole body is tense, every muscle buzzing with electricity as you keep going up the staircase in the heated hands of your betrothed.

The devil holds you tight only to burn you tighter.

//

[jackalopesao3]

Obey Me matchup please?

Hello, I hope it's alright if I submit this in this form instead of an ask.

I'm a hetero Female, 5'3" (161 cm), long dark blonde hair, blue eyes, pale, thin build, and wear glasses cause I'm blind af. I have a tomboyish sort of dress style. I like hoodies/jackets, don't like to wear skirts/dresses or high heels.

I'm a more quiet person, although I love memes and quoting things that make me laugh. I have a really immature sense of humor so sometimes simple potty humor is enough to get me going. It takes me a long time to fully trust someone. I have a lot of issues I don't like to talk about, including the fact that I'm autistic (aspergers to be precise) as it's something I really don't like about myself. I'm extremely self conscious about my looks, I don't think of myself as pretty or attractive. I hate it when people see me cry so if that happens I will hide and not come out till I'm ready. I have no confidence in myself, but I do have a willingness to learn. I can be sarcastic and will sometimes be a troll just for my own amusement. I consider myself more on the independent side so I'm not someone who needs constant attention. I like having my space and enjoying the silence when needed. I have a weakness for animals (especially cats, my cat is my baby) and Pokemon plush (hoarder). I'm into anime, manga, and video games. It's pretty much what I've invested all of my time into. I'm really reclusive and only go outside to work or go grocery shopping, although it's nice to get away from it all once in a while. I'm also a low energy person, so I enjoy a good siesta when I'm really tired. 

I don't know if I would consider myself touch starved, but I it's hard for me to be cuddly/intimate even with my family members, despite us being close. Not sure if it has to do with my autism or not, touch for me with other people is just kinda weird. That said, I'd like to be more intimate with those I'm close to, just have to get around the awkward feeling it gives me. Oddly enough, I touch/kiss/hug animals like my cat just fine. With animals, there is no awkward feeling. I'm the oldest of 3 children, and my sister wants to be hugged often and while I love her deeply, I wish she wouldn't hold onto me for so long. My brother is more like me, we love each other, but prefer to express our bond by talking about things nobody else really understands. It confuses our parents and strangers, but that just makes it the more entertaining for us. 

I hope this wasn't too long. Thank you for your time, I appreciate it!~

🤍❤️💛🧡💚💙💜💖❤️💛🧡💚💙💜💖🤍

Hiya, @lastnightshade!

I feel that you would match well with multiple Obey Me characters so it took me a bit of time to decide which one I thought was best. One particular did stand out to me that would make a good dynamic with you.

I believe that Belphegor would be the best match for you. I'm certain his sense of humor is quite similar to your own. Belphie is a sad boi so being able to make him laugh would help to take his mind off of more unpleasant thoughts. He appreciates your sarcasm and ability to troll. Often times, Belphie would join you in the trolling, especially if it involves Lucifer or Mammon (to him, they're just too funny when pranked). Belphie also loves wearing comfortable clothing. The two of you would definitely borrow hoodies and sweaters from each other. He'd find you so soft and comfy to hug when you're wearing a hoodie.

Belphegor is actually a pretty patient and understanding person (after the whole chapter 16 debacle). He would work hard to gain your trust and build up your confidence. He doesn't like seeing you so self conscious about yourself when it comes to your autism and your looks. Belphie is very observant and would pick up on this pretty quick. He'd help you learn to love yourself and embrace the things you are most conscious of.

You can cry in front of Belphie, as soon as he realizes why you hide, he'll offer you support and a shoulder to cry on. Once you begin to trust him more he will insist you come to him when you're feeling upset. He wants to be there for you to comfort you and protect you. When he falls for someone, he will do anything to keep them happy and safe. Belphie also respects your indenpendence at the same time. When you need space and don't want to be touched, he understands. He's happy to just curl up and take a nap somewhere while you decompress. The seventh-born will even show you some of his favorite spots to isolate himself when he needs alone time. Belphie doesn't mind taking his time with you, when you have issues with touching. He respects your boundaries and if you want to work on it, he will help you. He's always up for a nap and a cuddle if you're comfortable with it. If you can't handle touching, he's happy to just nap beside you. Much like you, he is low energy. Expect him and Beel to tag along when you go grocery shopping though. Just make sure Beel doesn't eat anything before it's paid for as Belphie doesn't always catch him.

Belphie enjoys similar activities to you. He'd be up for playing a video game with you or watching an anime. He might fall asleep but he'll try his best to stay awake for you. He definitely wouldn't mind if you used him as a pillow while you read your manga. He thinks your plushies are cute and also likes cats. Cats also like him as seen below:

Belphie also likes to have deep conversations with his s/o and bond over it. He will open up to you and tell you things he hasn't told his brothers. You both will help each other grow.

Runner-ups: Levi - you have a lot in common in terms of interests and personality; Solomon - I believe he could help you become more confident and give you strength; Mammon - I could see him bonding with you over humor and trolling.