#i'll write the whole verse soon . . .

[amoneki-ramblings]

do you think Kaneki might ever pray with Amon despite not being catholic himself? just sitting next to him mumbling the words as Amon says it because he likes to be with him

speaking of religion, what kind of faith do you think Kaneki would follow? I hc him as an atheist :) but I think you know more about religions than me lol

Ooooh I like that idea a lot actually I have So Many Thoughts (rubs my hands together evilly)

also this is just a sidenote but i know some people may be uncomfortable with religious discussion, so if you are lmk and i'll start tagging it :thumbsup:

I feel like Amon hasn't prayed often in a while because of his past, but he may still on occasion (habit), and may get back into it properly after actually resolving his feelings with the past. At some point Kaneki starts to join him. He doesn't really know How to pray, especially since a lot of it is in silence, he probably just kneels there and silently wishes for safety for his friends, for strength and resolve, etc. etc. But when Amon starts saying the actual prayers out loud he just sits there and listens to him quietly saying them.

At some point Kaneki might start mumbling along with them, he vaguely knows some of the prayers and has heard Amon say them enough times to kind of know them. Amon is surprised when Kaneki starts doing that and it just kind of becomes a Thing; maybe Kaneki even asks Amon to tell him how to pray the rosary since he sees him doing that often as well (when the rosary is prayed in a group there's one person leading that says the first half of most of the prayers and the rest say the other half, and I think it would be interesting with them alternating like that)

While Kaneki isn't catholic himself he finds it reassuring, while it's unlikely to him that there's someone out there that'll actually grant his prayers it's a nice thought, y'know? It's also just very relaxing there, even if it was kind of awkward at first

I think he also finds the sound of Amon praying very relaxing *cough*

I also think Kaneki would be atheist, while he wouldn't completely deny the possibility of there being a god of some sort he also isn't really a follower of any particular belief system (note: ive actually been informed that there is a better term for this, agnostic, which is essentially being neutral lol). I think Amon would know this, and therefore doesn't really know why Kaneki chooses to pray with him despite this, but he figures that Kaneki does have a lot of things he would want to pray for, things he would want to seek forgiveness for, too, and he appreciates that Kaneki is willing to spend time with him like this anyway.

[elynestum]

also it's notable that her characterization is inspired by padme amidala, & princess bean from disenchantment.. also sansa stark, here and there!

[zorkaya-moved]

@cxnvicts​ + 55 -— ( spotify starter meme. )​

“They're gonna chase [her] out of town,” Zarina chuckles upon thinking of the possibility. The FAC was quite unhappy with Bai Yi’s taking of the one who was in the epicenter of the Black Ring. Her soldiers died, one of the best teams in this damned office and those she personally trained to enter that damned dimension of mania and craziness. The one who worked extensively with Quinn and MBCC, the one who worked hand in hand with the 9th Division’s Langley. Certainly, the power under her hand was far beyond what others would expect, but she was a woman who loved to agitate others. The one who stood by her side after she got ‘detained’ in the Minos was one of the Boss Yi’s people, right? She remembered the reports, her smile would be one of an agitating entertainment. He did ask if she knew anything about Bai Yi’s and Zoya’s whereabouts, judging by her expression and her behavior: it seemed she knew, but how much? Well, it was up to debate as she would speak in a sing-a-long voice. “They've got a shovel in their left hand and in their right they've got a gun.”  //  boogeyman by black casino and the ghost.

[randomshyperson]

Lacy - Werewolf!Reader x Wanda Maximoff - Kinktober #07

Summary: This Halloween, Wanda receives a surprise visit from her favorite werewolf. The problem is that it's very difficult to keep a crush hidden during mating season.

Warnings: (+18), mutual pining, semi-public, very vague allusions to omega verse, beefy!reader, power!bottom wanda, a bit rough but they are actually sweet to each other, some praising and dirty talk. | Words: 3.144k

A/N-> First, I know nothing about werewolves. It was never my thing growing up (I’m a witch type of person I suppose) but I know about omegaverse stuff and since it’s wolf-based I tried some references from that lore. Also, I was totally thinking about Wednesday's show (and Wenclair ship tbh) when writing the school but you all be free to image whatever you wish. Also, the name is from Olivia Rodrigo’s song, ‘cause it’s such a friends-to-lovers/mutual pining coded lyrics. Good reading folks! 

General Masterlist | Kinktober Collection | AO3 | Wattpad

-&-

The mating season was always the most tiring part of the year.

Even as a child, her days were marked by hard work and running errands - her mother was always very busy with orders, and somehow, the twins were obliged to finish the tasks in record time, so as not to delay the calendars and keep Natalya busy when her customers needed her.

As the largest and most respected apothecary in the country, Natalya Maximoff was also one of the biggest dealers in magical items - and this also included natural suppressants. Her customers wrote to her from all over the world, many famous packs like the Romanoffs or the Howletts only bought her products, and the witch was always very busy at this time of year.

So when their mother told them that she would leave the Maximoff Magical Articles Boutique in their care for two whole days, while she delivered packages around the world, none of them were surprised, as this had been done dozens of times before.

Wanda's indignation stemmed from the fact that her twin brother, as soon as there were no more magical remnants of the portal his mother had conjured to travel through, put on a jacket and told her he was leaving.

"But you can't leave me alone!" Wanda hurried away from the counter. Pietro chuckled, adjusting his hat on his silver hair. Since he had turned 18 last month, he had grown a good few centimeters, and even with her best serious expression, Wanda, who hadn't grown much since she was 15, no longer succeeded in frightening him. That, and well, like his father, Pietro had a bastard heritage of lycanthropy, and with his new skills, he had also gained extreme confidence.

"What, you gonna tell me you're scared of some little wolves?" He sneered, his fangs protruding from his smile. Wanda huffed angrily, her cheeks slightly red. "Don't be silly, Wanda. You're a witch. Nobody's is crazy enough to mess with you."

He tries to pat her on the shoulder, but Wanda pushes a finger against his chest. "I'm not afraid of any wolves, you selfish idiot! Mom says the store is our responsibility. And you're sneaking off to do who knows what! I don't want to spend all night looking after this place on my own. Apart from the season, it's Halloween, and kids go apeshit and-"

"Jesus, Wanda, I'll make it up to you!" He cuts in, already pulling away and ignoring the other girl's protests. "I've got to go, I'm taking Crystal to the movies, then we'll settle up!

"Pietro!" But the call was ignored and the store door was slammed in her face.

Wanda huffed to herself. She could survive a Halloween night, but her brother would owe her a lot if he didn't want to be snitched on. She returned to the counter, texting him another dozen curses before texting to her mother that everything was under control.

And lucky for her, that's how the evening actually went. 

Most of the few customers who showed up were locals, a few sorcerers in need of ingredients, and even a traveling vampire who needed to replenish some reserves for a long trip. Some children also asked for candy, and tired of getting up so often, Wanda decided to leave the jars outside.

It was almost at the end of her shift, when she was ready to close the shop, that a delicious smell wafted into the room. Wanda, who was distracted by the holiday lessons that the institute where she studied always offered when there were short vacations or not, was snapped out of her concentration by the fascinating smell. She looked up just as a figure stumbled into the store, covered by a school uniform hood.

She didn't need you to remove the cap to recognize you, and yet, when your face became visible, Wanda felt her heart unlearn how to beat properly. 

"Good evening?" You looked between the shelves, approaching the cashier, only to hesitate as soon as you saw Wanda. "Oh, h-hi. Uh, is Madame Maximoff around?"

You looked uneasy, adjusting your hair and fiddling with your fingers. Your flushed face must have been due to the walk from the Institute to the store. 

Wanda shook her head as she replied: "She had some orders to place. How can I help you?"

The color of your face deepened, and you couldn't look her in the eye for more than two seconds. "Hmm, I kind of need... suppressants." And it was the turn of Wanda's face to heat up. You continued talking anxiously. "I thought I still had some, but my reservation ran out, and since I'm in the dorm, I wouldn't want to... well, would you have any left? I know it's very short notice but I really need it."

Wanda nodded quickly, equally at a loss for words. You see, if you were any other of her werewolf colleagues, the situation might even be comical. She wasn't like Pietro and didn't make friends very easily, but she shared the same taunting nature. One horny wolf in the store and Wanda would have jokes for the rest of the year. But it was you, her longtime secret crush, emanating a very pleasant scent and in need of something so intimate that Wanda could barely control her own thoughts about what other ways she could help you if there were no other suppressors in the store.

"My mom usually sells everything before the season starts, but I can look in the warehouse to see if we have any leftovers. I'll be right back." She says, smiling softly at your anxious figure.

Wanda has never seen you in heat before; the mating seasons for new wolves begin at the end of puberty, between the ages of sixteen and eighteen, and the vast majority of her werewolf classmates at the Institute return to their packs at this time of year, already matched with their partners in the traditions of the lycanthrope. Wanda only knows about the rituals from her father's family, because each clan, from the Vampires to the witches, is very private about it all. Witches like her mother, who specialize in all kinds of products, are the exceptions.

Wanda tries the storeroom next to the counter, but after a few boxes, she snorts in frustration. Her mother really did sell everything, and she almost reprimanded you for not planning properly. For older, mismatched wolves, being without suppressors could be really dangerous. For you, a new werewolf, it would only be quite painful. It was easier for her to feel sorry. 

And while she tried the last few shelves at the back of the storeroom, you grew even more restless outside. Wanda had no idea how intoxicating the essence of a witch, especially a witch one cared about, was. If you hadn't been so desperate, you would have given up going into the store as soon as you could smell her from around the corner, but then again, your brain wasn't working very rationally right now.

And there was also a scarf on the counter, Wanda's most characteristic item since she had received it as a gift so many years ago. Many of the times you've noticed her, she's worn the item around her neck and it made sense that her scent was so strong in the room, even though she was upstairs.

Your limbs moved by instinct, you didn't have to think much, just let yourself be guided by the urge to exhale that distinctive smell more deeply. 

Your face was pressed against the scarf when Wanda reappeared, and her confused giggle made you jump away mortified.

"Are you all right there?" She ventured, receiving a very quick and embarrassed nod. Wanda chuckled again in amazement, and without caring much about your current condition, she approached. "I looked upstairs, but my mother sold everything, sorry. There's something else you might like to try, maybe a calming potion so you can sleep while... well, this happens to you."

You quickly agree, still embarrassed at being caught. Wanda doesn't mind, if anything, she always found it very entertaining how different you were from the other werewolves she knew; loud and confident to the point of being idiotic. Pietro was a prime example. And if it wasn't for your distinctive stature, she could easily have assumed from your shy and careful personality that you were just an ordinary human, perhaps a mermaid from the way you seemed to bewitch Wanda's attention all to yourself.

"I'm sorry." You mutter suddenly, while she is searching for a sleeping potion on the shelf under the counter. Wanda turns her face up in confusion, but you're looking away. "From the scarf, I know it's... weird. But my body seems to be acting on its own. Just forget about it when we get back to school, okay? I'll be normal when it's over."

"Don't worry, I don't mind." She assured meekly, before finally finding some bottles that could help you and taking them back to the counter. She bit her lip at the way you were panting, and the way your trembling fingers pulled some notes and coins out of your pocket. "You can take these two vials today, and this one in the morning if you're still..."

"Horny'?" You joke, and take Wanda by surprise, but she manages to return the short laugh. Your hands push out the money and she turns away to pack the vials into a small bag. "So, one now and two tomorrow."

Wanda quickly denies it. "No, darling, two now and one tomorrow. Are you... are you sure you're all right? You're sweating-"

"Just give me a minute." You interrupt her with a gasp, the sudden wave of heat catching you completely off guard. The room starts to spin, and for a whole moment, all you can feel is your own arousal and the way you want to touch the witch in front of you. Your body gives way, and your hands force down on the counter, disastrously strong enough for the wood to crack. Wanda jumps in fright, worried, but you grunt quietly. "Shit, I'm really sorry-"

She hurries around the counter, and her soft hands make you jump away. "Hey, it's okay, I just want to help you stand up."

But you gasp in despair, wrenching your body away from her. "Don't touch me, Wanda, for God's sake." You grunt, and if you hadn't sounded so affected, Wanda would have taken offense. Instead, she stands ready to catch you if you lose your balance again, and that's exactly what happens. This time, your weight falls forward, and Wanda's body serves as a barrage. 

Your wolfish weight is almost too much for her, and it doesn't help that your face is buried against her collarbone, and your arms embrace her clumsily. "Hm, so soft." She hears you sigh, as she struggles to drag you over to the reading area of the store's bookshelves, where there's a sofa to put you on. When you fall into the cushions, you look up with dreamy eyes and an easy smile playing on your lips. Wanda gasps softly from exhaustion. 

"Wait here a moment, okay? You feel like you're burning up with a fever. I'll get you some water." She explains, but it doesn't seem like you're listening very much, disconcerting her with the way you're looking at you so discourteously, your pupils dilating. Wanda adjusts a strand of hair, self-conscious under your gaze. "I'll be right back."

She practically runs out of there, and alone, realizing her own hands are trembling as she remembers the sensation of having your body against hers. She shakes her head to push the thought away, you were clearly in a vulnerable moment right now, and Wanda doesn't think she'll survive the shame of being rejected once the heat wears off.

When Wanda returns with the water, she almost drops the glass on the floor. You haven't moved, but you've changed position, limp against the sofa, evidently rubbing yourself down the item as you whimper. 

"Oh, detka, let me help you." Wanda abandons the glass on a shelf, and rushes to your side, kneeling beside the sofa. You gasp in embarrassment, trying to escape her gaze, but Wanda's hands grab your warm face. "Let's go upstairs. I'll make it better." She whispers the invitation, but the thought alone is enough for you to grunt in affection and pull her face towards you. 

It's a hungry kiss, and the position doesn't help. Wanda has to grab your shoulders to keep from falling to the floor and ends up breaking into a giggle when a moment later it's you who's throwing yourself at her, desperately kissing her as if she's going to disappear. 

The lightness disappears quickly. She feels very hot and bothered, especially when your tongue slips into hers as if you already knew exactly how to kiss her, and your hands touch her entire body with determination. Her plea for you to slow down turns into a moan when your knee pushes between her legs.

It's almost primitive the way you seem willing to have her right there on the floor, angrily trying to pull her clothes off while your moans mingle. Wanda's face burns and she struggles to match the kiss, losing that battle all too easily when your palms begin to stimulate her nipples. 

She can feel the wetness begin to bother her through the fabric of her panties, and perhaps, you can smell it too, because you grow more impatient, and begin to murmur disconnected compliments into her skin, your hands reaching down to unzip her pants. Wanda chokes between moans, practically whimpering when your fingers find her so ready. 

You enter her, all at once, without a second thought. You suck on her tongue as she squeezes your fingerprints and soaks your hand. It's dirty and rough, and Wanda couldn't hold back even if she tried. Yet the store door opens, and she has to bite down hard on your shoulder to muffle her own noises.

Whoever the customer is, asking if there's anyone there or if the store is open, Wanda makes sure they don't see her. Her eyes are scarlet, and it's never been harder to do a concealment spell than it is now, with your fingers thrusting inside her as if the world around you hardly mattered. Finally, the customer leaves and her magic plays its part in locking the door before Wanda digs her nails into your back and comes against your fingers.

It's not enough - Nothing seems to be. You continue your movements inside her until Wanda is spasming again, begging for a pause. Your hungry mouth finds its way into her most intimate place then, just to tear more pleasure out of her. She loses count of how many times she comes, on your fingers and tongue, until the whole store smells of sex.

Fuck, she has to move you before Pietro comes back.

It's only when you let her breathe, retreating like a wounded wolf, that Wanda notices the puddle of moisture on your pants. You came at the mere act of watching and touching her. 

"Hey, are you okay, sweetheart?" She coos gently, propping herself up on one elbow now that you're lying on your back, one arm over your face. Your clothes are as torn as theirs, but there are many more marks on her body than on yours. 

You sniffle quietly, and Wanda looks at you with concern. "Why didn't you stop me?" you ask upset, and Wanda stares in shock for a moment. Then, swallowing dryly, she works up the courage:

"You didn't want this?"

But your reaction is to laugh incredulously. "Of course, I wanted it, Wanda! But I'm talking about you. Why didn't you stop me? You're a witch, you could have knocked me down, look at you! You're all purple, and I... God, I can't believe I... hurt you." 

She climbs into your lap before you can despair, ignoring your soft protest and grabbing your crying face. "I haven't stopped you because I've wanted you to since we met." She assures you determinedly, caressing your cheeks. "I'm in love with you, you idiot."

Sniffling softly, you raise hopeful eyes. "Really?"

Wanda smiles, her weight against your chest. "Really." She assures you. "And don't worry about the marks, I... like it rough."

You groan in embarrassment, looking away and amusing her. There's a moment's pause, and then finally: "I like you too."

Wanda bites back a smile. "I got that impression, you know? When you were all whiny on me." 

Your laugh is sincere and shy, and Wanda kisses you as your hands grip her thighs. But before she can deepen it the way she'd like, you break again.

"Thanks for helping with the heat... but I'll take you on a date after this. I promise."

She pulls on your bottom lip with a provocative bite. "I'll charge." She assures you in a naughty whisper, and you sigh contentedly as she presses your hips together. Smooth movements, and you're already seeing stars again. 

Your breathing becomes shorter, and Wanda traces her fingers along your jaw, while her other hand moves down. "I bet you're all warm and tight."

You sigh, closing your eyes and nodding in agreement. Wanda kisses you leisurely, also taking time to slide her fingers into your pants and assess the effects of everything so far. She's not surprised by the immense wetness, but the sensation of sinking into you is overwhelming. She can feel ready for another when she starts to stimulate you and watches you squirm beneath her.

"So good... don't stop..." You moan helplessly, and the grip on her thighs is almost strong enough to hurt. Wanda makes a mental note of how to make you lose control of your strength, before curling her fingers inside you and being rewarded with the sweetest sounds in the world. "W-Wanda!"

She decides she likes it very, very much when you whimper her name like that. She continues her motions a few more times until you come hard on her fingers. Wanda thrusts a few times, before removing them and bringing them to her mouth, sucking them clean while you try to catch a breath. 

Your murmurs are labored, and Wanda kisses your cheek a few times. "Come on upstairs, sweet baby, I'll take care of you." She tries to get up, but your hands steady her on your lap.

It's almost ridiculous how easily you lift the two of you, and Wanda has to hold onto your shoulders, chuckling softly at your uncertain stumbles on the way upstairs. 

She'll have time to look after the store when you fall asleep. Right now, she's more focused on kissing you again.

[letmeoutofthebasementt]

Hyunjin NSFW A-Z

Posting this one first because this one was...Actually requested. Was a full on NSFW reading what was requested? Yes. Did I feel like doing that right now? No. I'll probably do what was actually asked for soon though. ALSO, I don't know why this surprised me when Hyunjin choreographed red lights and admitted to writing everything but the English verses. He was in fact speaking from personal experience.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Definitely the type who likes cuddling and just generally pampering each other. I’m talking taking nice baths after, massaging each other, the whole shabang. Very tender and loving. Definitely the type who leaves marks DURING sex, so after he’s half admiring them half worried and making sure he didn’t actually hurt his partner.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite body part is his head? It’s an erogenous zone for him. He’s honestly not too sure what part is his favorite aesthetically. (Hyunjin being the hopeless romantic he is did indicate his heart with these cards. Love you Hyunjin but that’s not the point)

On his partner he likes hands. (Specifically around his throat)

He also just generally likes all of his partner’s body and their feet

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

His orgasms are definitely a euphoric and intense experience. Probably the type who cums a lot, and trembles when he does. Like I’m talking head empty no thoughts mind blank ears ringing. Did I mention he cums a lot? Because it’s a lot. I got a bountiful indicator here. So. Probably fertile? He honestly probably enjoys…Releasing inside of his partners whenever he can.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Uhhh…He really likes excitement and adrenaline in the bedroom. So angry sex, hate sex, sad sex, emotional sex, risky sex…Anyrhing that’d induce adrenaline. He’s also probably very kinky because of this, and he may even get kinkier and kinkier as time goes on because things quickly lose their thrill. He’s into vulnerability. The type that can’t have no strings attached sex. He likes surprise in the bedroom too. He has a lot of secret kinks and desires he doesn’t even want to share with me so that’s…Fun. Hyunjin is sex. He eats sleeps and breathes sex. He thinks about sex more than he probably should. (Not in a sleazy pervert way but in a very sexual person who gets horny easily way). Big corruption kink (both corrupting and being corrupted). Definitely has a consensual non-con kink.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Doesn’t have a lot because he needs that emotional connection, but still has experience regardless. But he’s very much a natural at sex

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Standing doggy style, 69, reverse cowgirl/cowgirl, missionary, spooning, lotus…You get the point.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Definitely can have light hearted banter and teasing in the bedroom. He doesn’t take himself too seriously during sex. WITH THAT BEING SAID, not much time to be goofy when having sex with Hyunjin because that’s IN.TENSE.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He likes both him and his partner’s to be neatly trimmed but they don’t necessarily have to be gone

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He’s a romantic at heart. WITH THAT BEING SAID, he also is very intense and in the moment. When he’s fucking, he’s not thinking about Romance, just the act of fucking. He’s more focused on the act than the romantic aspect. But at the same time because he’s a romantic to his core it’s still fairly romantic since it seeps out.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Probably jacks off a lot. He has a high libido after all, and he’s always rearing to go. Definitely into mutual masturbation and watching his partner masturbate/being watched while he’s doing so.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

This is already a lot...But he's into like...Tabboo things? And how do I put this...He has a corruption kink, right? The more...Intense side of it is essentially he himself wants to be...Corrupted. Like i'm talking used abused and defiled. Maybe even like...Okay, not a grape fantasy but a grape fantasy towards himself. He'd never necessarily think of doing that to someone else, but there's like...Something oddly hot to him about it happening to him? I don't think he necessarily wants it to happen, but the idea of it. He's also into power play, likes being very adventurous and is very kinky in general, choking, hair pulling, bondage, the idea of him and his partner...'Ruining' each other...May possibly be into like...Knife play? Maybe possibly? Into impact pla as well. (This entire section has sent me through an emotional rollercoaster but i'm down if you're down Hyunjin? (NOT the grape fantasy just realized that may sound wrong))

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He likes having sex in familiar places but also likes adventurousness and risks. So like...Would in fact maybe possibly fuck in the practice room or something like that. Though he probably still fantasizes about doing it in like...Semi public places? But not public.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Feet. Anything emotional or intimate. Anything he loves. Anything he's connected to. Anything he's bonded to. Tits.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Random flings with people he's not attached to, himself getting put in... Jeopardy? He's very self-focused in sex even if he kind of prioritizes the other party. Kinda. Maybe. Anything involving bodily fluids other than like...(I dunno what term to use for this) natural...Lubrication or cum. Or tears did I mention he likes when his partners cry during sex?

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He doesn't have a preference for giving or receiving. He just fucking loves oral. Probably extremely good at it, too.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Definitely fast and rough. Point blank period. Absolutely FERAL. Granted, he may be more slow and sensual on certain occasions or like...At the start of sex if it's his partner's first time. At the start.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Love a good quickie

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Loves a good risk

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He has a lot of stamina. Though sometimes he gets very enthusiastic and may finish...Kind of quickly? But he can probably go for like a lot of rounds to make up for that. His recovery also may be fairly fast? Not abnormally so, but fairly fast.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

I don't think he's tried because he's scared it may be too much? But if he did...Toys. Toy connoiseur.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

THE tease but also too impatient to keep it up. Like he'll be trying to tease his partner, but he won't be able to keep it up after they get all needy and whiney and desperate because he's only human (And an impatient one at that).

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

EXTREMELY vocal. King of dirty talk, a mix of degradation and praise probably. Physically incapable of shutting the fuck up during sex. He'll let you know exactly how you're doing and how good you make him feel. He'll pretty much do whatever? He'll moan and sigh and gasp and whine and whatever he feels like doing.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He fantasizes about having sex with multiple people at once. He never would because he has jealousy and possessiveness issues, but it's definitely a fantasy.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Definitely large and aesthetically pleasing. (I could write prose on how ugly most peni are, and the strict qualifications an aesthetically pleasing penis would have to have but i'm not going to because this is an odd thing to be so passionate about.)

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Higher than people at a reggae concert. Which is HIGH. Extremely. Very.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

After aftercare he likes to cuddle with his partner and then fall asleep because it's intimate.

[obxologies]

𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘖𝘯 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘖𝘸𝘯, 𝘒𝘪𝘥  𝘑𝘑 𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘢𝘯𝘬

warnings: angst, unrequited love

requested?: no

author's note: this based mostly on like the first verse of the song. hope you guys enjoy this, been in a bit of a slump with writing lately. also i didn't know how to stop it so sorry it's so awkward at the end lmao

JJ Maybank may not have seemed perfect to most of the people around him, but to y/n he was everything she had ever wanted.

JJ was y/n's first friend. None of the other kids had bothered to talk to her, but the energetic blonde boy ran right up to her and asked her to join him and his friends soccer game so the teams would be even, and from that day on he would never let her sit alone.

It was almost inevitable that y/n would soon grow feelings for the boy. y/n had been alone for just about her whole life. Her parents rarely payed much attention to her, and no one bothered to make friends with the quiet girl, so JJ's kindness was special to her and she didn't want to lose him. She kept her mouth shut about her crush. It wasn't worth losing him over, but it still hurt to watch him fall in love with someone else. That someone else being their friend, Kiara.

y/n knew the moment JJ started to have a crush on Kiara. She knew him better than anyone and that boy was infatuated with the kook turned pogue. It crushed her the first time she figured it out and it hurts just as much two years later which is why the acceptance letter in her hand that stated she would get the chance to study abroad her senior year of high school felt like a breath of fresh air. Until JJ found out.

"You're leaving?" JJ asked making y/n look up from her phone over to JJ who stood by the desk on the other side of her room. He held up acceptance letter with a confused look on his face. "What the hell is this?"

"It's nothing, J. Don't worry about it." y/n said standing up from her bed walking over to him. She reached out for the piece of paper, but he moved it out of her reach.

"You're moving away." JJ said eyeing the paper again. "In a couple months." He looked back up at her. "Were you going to tell anyone?"

"Of course I was, J." y/n said. "I just got the letter yesterday."

"Where are you going?" JJ asked.

"London. They have a really good program and it would be a great opportunity for me, y'know?" y/n smiled softly.

"Yeah, that's great for you." JJ nodded. "Just leave us all behind and go start a new life." He said annoyed.

"JJ, it's not like that." y/n shook her head. "I'd come back before graduation, and I'll keep in touch with you guys-"

"Until you won't." JJ interrupted her.

"What?" y/n questioned.

"C'mon, y/n. Don't act stupid." JJ said making her frown. "You'd keep in touch with us until you find new friends and then you'll forget all about us while you're living it up in London."

"JJ, that's not true. You guys are my friends. You are my best friend. I'd never just abandon you guys." y/n insisted.

"Well, it kind seems like that's what you're doing." JJ scoffed. "Why did you even apply for this? Why didn't you tell anyone, huh?"

"I didn't even know if I'd be accepted." y/n said. "I just needed to," She paused.

"Needed to what?" JJ raised a brow. He rolled his eyes when she looked away from him. "Yeah, whatever. Have fun in London." He said spitefully. He crumbled the paper tossing it at her before storming out of her room.

Maybe it was for the better that he hated her, she thought to herself. This way it wouldn't be as hard to leave.

JJ hadn't spoken to y/n in three days. He was avoiding her like the plague. It didn't help that he had told all the pogues. Fortunately, they were more supportive and understanding than he was.

"He'll come around, y/n/n." Pope patted her back.

"Yeah, hopefully." y/n gave him a small thankful smile. Her eyes trailed over to JJ who stood with Kiara running the keg. "I think I'm gonna head home for the night though." She said finishing the rest of her beer before tossing it in the trash bag.

"Okay, see ya later." Pope waved her off which she returned.

y/n glanced at JJ one last time before heading up the beach. She sighed to herself, shoving her hands into her pockets grabbing her phone out of her pocket to check the time seeing she had only been at the party for an hour. She stopped with a huff trying to decide if should go home.

"y/n!" She heard his all too familiar voice call from behind her. She turned around seeing the blonde boy jogging towards her.

"Hey." She said walking a few steps closer.

"Are you leaving?" JJ asked stopping in front of her.

"I think so." y/n nodded looking around avoiding his eyes. "Do you need something?"

"No." JJ shook his head.

"Okay." y/n trailed off. She slowly turned to leave, but JJ spoke again.

"Did I do something?" JJ asked. "To make you leave. I, I just wanna know why you didn't tell me about anything." He pinched the bridge of his nose.

"It's really complicated, JJ. I don't wanna make things worse." y/n said.

"I don't think it matters right now." JJ stated making her frown.

"Look, JJ. I don't have anything here for me, and I just want a fresh start. I wanna go somewhere where I'm more than just a kid from the cut." y/n explained.

"You have us." JJ scoffed. "Unless we don't mean anything to you."

"You guys mean more to me than anything else in the world, JJ. You mean more to me than anyone or anything." y/n paused staring at him sadly. "I'm in love you, JJ. I know you don't feel the same, okay? And that's fine. I know you and Kie like each other and that's fine because all I care about is that you're happy."

"You're leaving because of me?" JJ frowned.

"I'm leaving because of me." y/n said. "Because I need to get out of this stupid town or nothing good is going to happen for me. So please don't make me leave on bad terms with you, J." She said as tears started to fall down her cheeks.

"You're in love with me?" JJ furrowed his brows.

"I always have been, JJ." y/n gave him a small smile.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know." JJ looked away.

"It's not your fault, J." y/n shook her head. "You've always been the best friend I could ask for."

tags: @thejuleshypothesis @jjmaybankswifes-blog

[scarletcomalies]

distant star

Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Word count: 3,428

A/N: Age Of Ultron Wanda because asdkghjksñlfñ why not?!

Warnings: Angst, unspoken feelings, you name it!

Pietro Maximoff recognized talent wherever he saw it, and that's how he made you a member of the band whose lead vocalist and guitarist was his twin sister Wanda Maximoff. Not knowing how or when, all the songs you wrote ended up being about her.

"Alright, let's go over it again."

You rolled your eyes and let out a dramatic sigh, pretending to be annoyed at the brunette's request.

"Don't look at me, look at Pietro who completely messed up in the second verse!" Wanda exclaimed defensively, as she raised her arms in a mock surrender.

"But sing louder, I could run a marathon with the distance you set between you and the microphone!" He protested.

"Oh, shush!" Wanda exclaimed. "It's not about whether I sing loud or not, it's about your bass following a certain pattern and be guided by my guitar! Every time I play this chord, you must follow me..."

You laughed lightly at the little argument that was going on between the twins for maybe the third time throughout the rehearsal. It had barely been twenty minutes.

"Come on, guys!" You interjected. "If you keep arguing this frequently, night will fall, and you know how my mom is when it comes to noise."

Your house possessed a spacious and ideal garage that was perfect for a band to spent its beginnings with. Because of this, you generously offered your house as a rehearsal space most of the time.

However, there was a slight hitch in this arrangement. Your mother, like the Tess Coleman character straight out of one of your favore movies "Freaky Friday", she had the habit of turning off the power switch in the garage as soon as night time came.

Both Wanda and Pietro stopped their argument, and exchanged one last accusatory look, almost as if to say, "You are to blame."

"Clint, you count..." Wanda turned to the drummer, and subsequently, he gathered his drumsticks and did the counting.

You weren't sure how or when you started to sense this, but you knew it when you noticed that you stopped looking down at your guitar and instead, kept your eyes on her, and memorized every gesture she tended to make; frowning or wrinkling her nose during high notes, closing her eyes throughout the whole melody, moving her heel to the sound of her guitar, and your favorite one, when she opened her eyes just to dedicate you glances of approval every time you did a solo with your guitar.

You thought maybe it was the energy and passion Wanda put into every note, as you marveled at the way she gave herself completely to the music, but you realized it was beyond admiration when every song you wrote ended up being a loving ode to every aspect that made her up. Even when you tried to write a funny song about partying, you somehow ended up redirecting it to the woman next to you.

"And so I watch you from afar, like a distant star...

For I'll always love you, but you'll never know...

Ink and paper, my silent confidantes they are…

They seem to whisper, 'Your secret's safe,' as emotions flow..."

Wanda concluded the last song you wrote for her, and this time, it turned out incredibly. You knew it when she let out that sigh of satisfaction that only happened when neither of you messed up a note.

"Another love song, and we don't know your muse," Clint commented, placing his drumsticks on the snare drum.

"I don't have a muse," you excused yourself, and as if it were instinct, you looked at Wanda, who was very busy tuning her guitar.

"I don’t believe you," Pietro stated, as he placed his left arm around your shoulder, while his free hand held the neck of his bass as it rested on his side.

"Come on, I just... write whatever comes to mind," you shrugged. "I don't think of anyone specific, and they don't mean anything."

Both Pietro and Clint scoffed in disbelief, clearly not buying your attempt to brush off their accusation.

“Come on, there has to be some-…” Pietro said.

“Enough,” Wanda interrupted him, and you sighed in relief, sending a thankful look her way. “Whether there is a muse or not, you have every right to tell us when you feel like it. And if that day never comes, that’s okay too,” she added.

“Thank you, Wanda!” You exclaimed, emphasizing those three words as you glanced at your two male bandmates, who were very nosy about your love life.

Pietro withdrew his arm from around your shoulders, but not before giving you a little nudge to annoy you for being spared further questions.

"Now, do you have your three song suggestions for the setlist?" The brunette changed the subject.

In a month's time, perhaps the biggest presentation you would have so far would take place, as a well-known bar gave you a space, and besides, it was going to be Halloween. The four of you were excited, and very determined to seriously connect with the audience, and not just be a very irrelevant background noise for people who were only focused on getting drunk.

After having rehearsed your own songs for a week straight, it was time to focus on the covers. Each of the band members had the right to suggest three songs to elaborate the setlist for this presentation, and you would be the first to make your choice known.

"Break In by Halestorm and Amy Lee," Wanda read the first title, and nodded with a smile. "Things I'll Never Say by Avril Lavigne," she continued. "Oh! Lovesong by The Cure?!”

"Yes..." you said in a hesitant tone.

"Are we seeing the same person who for the last show made us play Angel's Punishment by Lacuna Coil?" Clint exclaimed from his seat, while laughing.

"Oh! My throat still hurts from doing those gutturals," Pietro seconded, rubbing his throat in a dramatic manner.

"Lacuna Coil is an excellent band," you justified.

"And Pietro, you insisted on doing those gutturals, when I could have done them Maria Brink style," Wanda added. "Speaking of which, how about Scarlet by In This Moment? It's among my suggestions actually..." she changed the subject again, to evade another interrogation towards you.

And so, with each passing rehearsal afternoon, your feelings for Wanda became more and more unbearable, and thus, more and more noticeable.

So notorious, that Pietro and Clint were fully aware that all those songs you couldn't stop writing were about her. And therefore, their insistence was no longer about you revealing the identity of your muse, instead, their new goal was to convince you to confess to her.

"(Y/N), my little sister would melt for you just by knowing that you wrote songs for her," Pietro tried to persuade you, following you into the kitchen of your house with the excuse of helping you carry ice for the drinks you would take to the garage.

"And what if she doesn't? What if she finds me weird?" You countered. "She had zero interest in knowing who the person I was writing for was."

"Exactly!" Pietro exclaimed, clearly seeing it from a different point of view than you.

And more of these conversations took place whenever Wanda wasn't around, and to say you were fed up was an understatement.

You were afraid to risk the beautiful, deep-rooted friendship that had blossomed between you and the brunette ever since Pietro introduced her to you seven months ago and said: "I got us a main guitarist."

So frequent became those sleepovers where you would listen to your favorite music, watch classic movies from the 2000s, and have deep conversations until two in the morning. Pietro would jump at the bed at early hours in the morning, asking Wanda to make him pancakes since he was nice enough to give up the TV so you guys could use it.

She also had a sixth sense that seemed to provide her the ability to appear when you needed her the most, as your eyes would sparkle with excitement every time you heard the doorbell ring and subsequently saw Wanda from your window with a basket full of both of you guys' favorite snacks, and her guitar in hand, which meant she would take you to the park to compose songs in a notebook you shared, with the purpose of distracting you from whatever happened that day. Even though the notebook you wrote in didn't have a single free space, and was full of scratches and notes, you didn't have the heart to throw it away.

That was just the tip of the iceberg. That was why it frustrated you that your male bandmates would take so lightly something as delicate as telling your best friend that you were head over heels in love with her, so you clung to your secret love, treasuring it like a fragile shadow that resided within you.

And so, the big day came. Pietro, Clint, Wanda and you took your positions on the small stage in the bar. Within the crowd, you noticed a few familiar faces, and a feeling of happiness invaded you as you realizes that you were slowly reaching a point where you could say you had a few loyal fans already.

"Good evening, everyone!" Wanda's accent added a little bit of allure to her words, drawing everyone's attention. "Thank you for joining us tonight!"

And with that, the first song started, as soon as Clint counted in with a rhythmic tap of his drumsticks.

As you gracefully played your guitar along with Wanda's, you couldn't tear your gaze away from her. You remembered vividly how the light casted a mesmerizing glow around her, and she always maintained those little habits while she performed, not to mention that astonishing voice of hers, that could go from raspy to high pitched, from sorrowful to joyful in a matter of seconds.

You didn't care if the entire audience noticed the intensity of your gaze. In fact, you were proud to declare, even silently, that you were deeply in love with Wanda Maximoff. The passionate emotion in your lyrics seemed to resonate even more as she poured her heart into every word, and there you realized that, even mindlessly, the brunette seemed to understand your feelings more than anyone else.

"I want you to meet the incredibly talented musicians who make up this band," Wanda said as soon as the audience finished applauding, her enthusiasm made you smile automatically. "On main guitar, we have the amazing (Y/N)," she gestured towards you, and you did a small reverence as everyone cheered you with applause and whistles. "On bass, my twin brother Pietro, who's older by thirteen minutes... so whenever he brags about being the older sibling, just remember, it's only by thirteen minutes!" She joked, and Pietro burst out in laughter as he also greeted at the public with a wide grin plastered on his face. "On drums, we have the talented Clint!" She gestured towards the drummer's way, and he stood up as he waved at everyone. "And... I'm Wanda, the rythm guitarist and vocalist."

The evening continued, and so far, all those rehearsals had been worth it, for there were a considerable number of people jumping and clapping animatedly, and for every time you looked away from Wanda to look at the audience, it seemed as if the number doubled.

Until it came time to introduce the last song you had written about the woman next to you.

It held a significance to you beyond comprehension, and although you had seen her rehearse it multiple times, there was something different about that night that was going to make it more magical than the other times.

"The next song was written by my beloved main guitarrist," Wanda said into the microphone, and the entire audience clapped and whistled in a form of support for you. "I always thought it was a beautiful song, but now I can say that this one has a face, and... a name," she added, and again, everyone in the audience applauded. You turned to face Pietro, who shrugged, and as you turned to face Clint, he looked as confused as you.

"This last song I would like to dedicate to my dear Vision, the man who I have secretly loved for so long, and two weeks ago, he came to me and confessed what I thought impossible, he reciprocated."

It felt as if as if a thousand swords pierced right towards your heart, shattering it into a million pieces as her words echoed through the room.

Every memory you shared with Wanda came crashing down upon you, each one of them feeling like a heavy brick that fell over you, until they slowly buried you. You thought, only in death was it possible to experience such a thing, but you were wrong, the agony of heartbreak was just as overwhelming.

"There you are... hi, darling!" She giggled, and Vision shyly laughed as he greeted the public around him.

You glanced at his direction, and there he was, with his blonde hair and glasses, the man who took everything from you... but objectively talking, he was simply the man who took the chance you always took for granted, and therefore, you ended up missing.

But even then, you forced yourself to swallow your heart that was threatening to come out of your throat, and began to play the corresponding chords. You hadn't invested so many weeks of dedication for a moment of weakness to make you throw away all that effort.

"And so I watch you from afar, like a distant star...

For I'll always love you, but you'll never know...

Ink and paper, my silent confidantes they are…

They seem to whisper, 'Your secret's safe,' as emotions flow..."

Somehow, you were grateful for that small work of mercy that the universe had for you, as you didn't know how you would have survived if you had not chosen this song as the closing song.

As soon as you left the stage, you made your way to the outside of the bar, almost hoping that your feelings were an object that you could simply forget about in there, but the reality was that they were chasing you until you drowned.

"(Y/N)?" You heard Pietro's voice, behind you, and you ran to him desperately seeking comfort, like a soul in sorrow that had just been banished from all that could have been a valley of angels.

As soon as you felt the warmth of his body, you burst into tears. It wasn't just the pain that Wanda had found someone else, but the fact that she had taken something as sacred as words spoken from the most vulnerable part of your heart and addressed them to another individual as if they were a crumbled piece of paper that she could toss, not caring where it landed.

"I swear I had no idea," Pietro whispered, stroking your head as he rested his chin on your head. "Vision was a family friend, but she never gave any signs, never mentioned anything."

The older twin's shirt was stained with your tears, as the merciless cold threatened to freeze you both right there, but despite the multiple signals your body was sending through shivering and shuddering sighs, you remained in the same place letting the silence of the street drag with it your sobs and wails for a love that was never yours.

Pietro took you home after an hour, and embraced you, while your tears clouded your sight until it was completely obscured, making you fall into a deep sleep, as if your body had taken pity on you and knocked you out to mitigate the pain that was eating away at you.

The next day, Clint arrived with boats of ice cream in an attempt to cheer you, and comforted you as much as physically possible. Each one of them, in their unique way, seemed willing to take every piece of you and put it back together, like you were their very own human kintsugi, making you even more resilient than you were before the chaos shattered you.

Wanda showed up after a week, her patience worn thin by the deafening silence that had persisted ever since what was supposed to be your big night. Her concern for you had grown, and she couldn't stand the thought of her messages going unanswered any longer.

"Hey," she greeted you, and judging by her smile, she seemed so oblivious that it somehow relieved you. Even in the midst of all your sorrow, all you wanted was for her to choose her own path of happiness even if it was one that didn't involve you as her partner.

Yes, you wanted to be part of her journey, maybe like a distant star yet so shiny it could be perceived even from 150 million kilometers apart. And in that moment, your love for her manifested itself more than in any song you could ever have written, because you decided to withdraw and pretend that your heart was not shattered, just so that hers could beat unbound.

"Hey, listen, I was not ignoring you, it's just that I am having the worst migraines lately, perhaps for the cold..." you excused yourself.

"I know," she said, her tone telling it all. She knew. "I know everything."

Pietro... who else could it be?

Two simple words that you have heard before through different contexts were able to thwart the fragile equilibrium you had acquired, for that was the first thing that started a fury within your being, and it wasn't the fact that Pietro had exposed you.

"Hey, hey, calm down..." Wanda quickly exclaimed, interrupting your train of thought. You blinked a couple of times, and your vision was blurred, indicating that you were starting to cry.

"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" You exclaimed, as you sobbed. "I just... I don't know how or why it happened, I'm so sorry," you apologized in a desperate plea for understanding.

You felt the need to apologize, because you felt as if being in love with Wanda was a transgression against your friendship, a condemnation to put it to an end.

She captured you in her arms, and naturally, you weakened at her touch, as you did with her and no one else. It was maybe something you could not comprehend, but it always felt as if there wasn't a point where you ended and Wanda started, therefore, the weight on your shoulders distributed itself so it would be a little more bearable. 

"I have this habit of being negative to no end, so I don't let myself down by getting my hopes up so high," Wanda spoke, once she allowed you to let out everything you had stuck, because she knew very well that you needed it. "I wanted to believe that those songs were about me, but.... what if they weren't? So I kept telling myself constantly that they were about someone else. And it hurt. It hurt just imagining it, and I was where you are now."

In that moment, it felt like the world had ceased to turn. You couldn't believe what you had just heard. Wanda, the woman you had secretly loved, was confessing that she had feelings for you too. It was a revelation that seemed too surreal to be true, and your mind struggled to process it.

Before you could find the right words to answer her, she continued, "I never saw my brother as furious with me as he was after that night," the brunette confessed, sighing. "He asked me, 'Why Vision? You're lying to yourself', and he said I didn't deserve that love song you wrote about me, as I dedicated it to a man that I don't love. In response, I kept insisting that all those songs weren't for me, and that the best thing to do was to try to move on, convince myself that Vision was the safer option, even if I knew in my heart that you were the right option..." she paused. "Out of frustration, he told me everything. And I'm sorry, so sorry, because Pietro is right, I don't deserve to..."

You stopped her right there, and crashed yous lips with hers.

There. The wait was over, and in that perfect, heart-stopping moment, everything fell into place.

She reciprocated immediately, and you could feel her firm grip on your waist. You felt a deep pleasure due to the culmination of unspoken feelings, but overall, you knew you finally had found home in Wanda's lips when the kiss felt more natural than anything else.

"It's just one song," you whispered softly against her parted lips. "I can always write more."

[bangchansgirlsblog]

OH. MY. GOD.

Need a part 2 of the Hyunjin introducing his gf fic !!!

And for requests maybe skz chan and reader get into an argument and the other members side with him too cause of a misunderstanding and u feel wronged so u go off the grid like Mia without your phone and when they realise that it was just a misconception they call u but you're obvi not picking up ...and they show up to your apartment or sum but you ignore them?

I love your writing so much ASJSJFJDJSJA

“The fight”

-Chan

Warning: Angst

Pairing: Chan x reader

Summary: the fight over who sings what and why you can’t sing a specific part

HELP- DHURHEHS to whoever requested this I’m so sorry 😭I’m gonna make an actual better one yeah? Just bear with me on this one. 🩷

I had such bad writers block and I couldn’t think of anything 😔

**

Being in a relationship with one of your band mates is hard. It's the hardest thing you'll do and you'll probably end up broken up and out the band.

That didn't happened to me (thank God) but the day they told us that we had a comeback soon and we also had tour coming soon we all knew this was fighting season.

The season where we all fought each-other and couldn't stand each-other because of all the hours in the studio rooms together.

The season we all stepped on each-other's toes or bumped into one another learning new choreography.

The season where we had to learn 10+ dances with 15+ different concepts. Makeup 24/7 to hide our eye bags and avoid fans with the same questions. "What's the new album about?" Or "do we have a Y/n and Chan collaboration??"

Comeback season was the season where anxiety was high and our coffeee intake was higher and I was slowly losing my patience.

I was a ticking time bomb.

"Chan I think that I.N's verse should go here," I tell my boyfriend who was sat on his rolling chair. We were all sitting in the studio and throwing ideas back and forth the whole straykids song. "See if I.N sings this part then I'll sing this part cause I can't sing that high note Chan. I really can't."

"Changing that will have to make us change everything again babe because I.N's voice can't go right after Seungmin's voice then back to your voice," He sighs while rubbing his tired eyes and yanking at his hair.

This song was getting to all of us. It was the last one after all so it had to be the best song in the album. The best one so stays could sing along.

"Chan's right because then me and Han will have to change verses again, which will mess up the whole song." Changbin adds on. He was laying on Hyunjin's lap while Hyunjin slowly scrolled through whatever it was he was on.

"I know but you guys gave me the hardest part and you know I'm singing all the high notes in almost all songs!" I exclaim and roll my eyes.

This wasn't our first argument today. It was obvious but we had to get everything done. Even if this was our 20th argument we had to get everything done. That's all that mattered.

"Y/n. You don't have to be so difficult. Just do it," Chan says while putting down his book and pen and letting out another frustrated sigh.

I frown at the fact that they refused to listen to me. Nothing would have to be difficult if they just listened.

"I'm not being difficult I'm just telling you guys my voice won't be able to handle-"

"Y/n you've complain this whole day, can you just please stop. My head is banging," Leeknow cuts me out. He was laying in the corner on the couch. Head down with a hat on. "Look I love you but just do it. It can't be that hard," He grumbles and closes his eyes.

The boys were all silent clearly not going to back me up and it hurt. I wasn't being annoying. I know I wasn't because my voice ached. My voice was strained and they didn't even care.

My vision goes blurry as I just sit back and keep quiet, not daring to speak because of the fear of my voice failing.

"Can you not cry right now please? You've cried the whole day too and I'm tired of it. You can't cry out of every situation," Chan, my boyfriend, MY boyfriend says y heart breaks into millions of pieces.

His eyes go wide as he realizes the damage his caused. His body quickly turning to my direction as he reaches out for my hand.

"Really Chan? Are you being Foreal right now?" I get up from the chair I was in. The hot tears starting to slowly fall down my cheek.

"No wait babe I didn't mean that-"

"Maybe if I'm such a cry baby I shouldn’t be in the fucking group." I spit at him with so my venom in my tone.

"No babe I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that, okay? Let's just chill out right now."

If they thought I was this horrible they should just kick me out of the team. They clearly won't listen to me. Why would Chan treat me like this?

"Why do you guys never listen to what I have to say about anything? Y'all always just do what you want!" I exclaim and get up from my chair causing Chan to stand up and the boys to pay attention.

"We do listen to you baby, sometimes is just that your ideas aren't the best and affect all of us."

"I'm trying to tell you that I can't hit that note and Seungmin can, why do you have to be so difficult about it?"

"I'm the difficult one? I'm the difficult one?" He exclaims and throws his hands up in the air.

"Y/n maybe let's not start an argument right now," Felix interrupts our conversation making me glare at him.

I glare at Felix as more anger fills me.

"Felix are you really taking his side right now?"

"I'm not in just saying we shouldn't be arguing like this, it's getting too much!"

"Okay then I'll leave-"

"Are you serious right now bro? We have things to do," Han says jumping into the argument.

"Then do them without me! I'm done with this." I start grabbing my stuff and furiously wiping my now flowing tears.

"Ugh!" Chan growls and throws something at the wall causing my to jump. I look up at him and watch him rubbing his temples and mumbling words.

I was clearly not going to be listen to and I was clearly being "difficult". I refuse to be around any of them. Atleast not right now.

Without hesitating I grab my stuff and walk out the door hearing a "No wait don't go!" Before I slam it.

But then the door automatically opens right after and I hear my name being called.

"Babe stop, come back. I'm sorry okay?" I hear Chan's footsteps getting closer to me. I don't even bother to look his way but his hand had already wrapped around mine and he turned me around.

"Leave me alone Chan. I'm tired of fighting you."

"I'm not fighting you baby, let's talk please? Let's figure it out." His hand quickly wraps around my waist as he pulls me to somewhere quiet.

I look at him eager for him to start the conversation and he can sense it.

"Tell me why you don't want to sing that part of the song when we both know you can,"

He softly says as his hands rub mine.

"Chan it's nothing.."

"It's something because something's wrong and you're not telling me."

"My voice.." I start before clearing my throat and looking into his eyes that we're searching for mine "My throat hurts everytime I sing now and I'm slowly losing it Chan,"

"What? Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I didn't want to worry you-"

"Baby I am supposed to worry about you, I'm still your group leader and anything that happens to you will be braught back to me. Have you checked with the medical stuff?"

"Yeah I did, they said I should be put on vocal rest."

"That's really bad baby, you should have just told us and we could have figured out stuff, I'm sorry I tried to push you,"

"It's okay, I know I can be a handful sometimes,"

"No don't say that, your not a handful. We just have to listen to you and stop being jerks."

"Yeah I can agree with that." I let out a chuckle and he smiles.

"I love you," his hands wipe my tears and he kisses my forehead.

"I love you too baby."

"Let's go back in the studio and I'll explain everything to the boys yeah? I'm sure they'll be more lenient now." He softly says and intertwines our fingers.

**

Thank you for the request baby🩷

[elvisabutler]

OK, I'll bite: since your requests are open, may we please, with all the cherries on top, get a Dove pregnancy fic? If you have the time and energy, of course - I know your WIP list is crazy, and I'm sure you have all kinds of things going on irl too, as we all do! 😘

if your child needs a daddy, i can help

summary: you find yourself pregnant with your first kid and you and austin make room for them in your lives despite how sometimes the whole pregnancy makes you feel emotionally and physically. fandom: austin butler | elvis ( 2022 ) rating: m, i suppose. he does get his finger inside of her. pairing: austin butler x priscilla actress reader ( little dove verse ) word count: 2261 warnings: the normal warnings apply for this verse. daddy kink. dom/sub dynamics. brief mentions of past relationships that were not at all pleasant. anxiety. negative self talk. pregnancy kink. breeding kink. THESE WARNINGS MAKE IT SOUND MORE SMUTTY THAN IT IS. but it's actually quite fluffy. austin's just horny for his wife. referenced/implied fingering. future and past p in v sex referenced. author’s note: consider this canon for the main verse? obviously set in the future so- god maybe 2024/2025? generally speaking i loved this prompt and technically meant to keep it short or at the very least fluffy but uh- well austin's a horndog is really what happened. thank you anon for this prompt, truly, i'm really trying to get up the courage/gumption to restart actually actively writing for dove and austin and stuff like this and the asks really help more than you know. also thank you for acknowledging my crazy wip list. didn't actually think i'd write this as quick as i did, and truly i meant to have it up on mother's day when i realized how quick i was writing it but this past weekend. lord she was a doozy in my work real life. anyway i hope you like it and anyone who actually wants to be tagged for this verse, either hit me up in my ask box or my dms or someway. i didn't do my normal austin tag list for this because i know this verse has been known to occasionally bother some people and i don't want to put it in your face if you don't want to read it, you know?

It happens- as all things do with you and Austin- quickly. It comes within the two months of you telling Austin you want to make Austin a real Daddy. A daddy who can hold his child and rock it and sing it little lullabies until it grows up to be and strong like their parents. You'd think since you're a grown woman and a surprising amount of your life has become regimented in ways it wasn't after dating and then marrying Austin that you wouldn't miss your period and not notice. You wouldn't miss it one month, two months and only realize something's strange when you go to visit Austin to see his show and hiss and practically yelp in pain when he presses up against your chest. They were bigger but they always got a little bigger around your period, it was fine. But then Austin is murmuring in your ear and pressing his hand against your stomach where he can feel a firmness where there wasn't one before.

"Are you pregnant?"

That's a weird question to ask, you're due for your period any day now, you think, thinking that you're close enough to the beginning of the next month that you're due for one soon. Not that it'll be your third missed period in a row. You shake your head, "no, I'm due for it next week, I think."

Austin raises an eyebrow and presses against the firm spot, waiting for it to give only to realize it's staying firm, there's something there. "When was your last one, Dove?"

You open your mouth to answer once, twice, three times before you look down at his hand against your stomach and see how your breasts are practically spilling out of your bra and you let out a noise of delight and shock rolled into one. Your voice is soft when you answer him finally. "I don't remember."

The squeal of delight you let out and the way Austin laughs and laughs and laughs twirling you around before setting you back down so he can kiss your belly is something the cast talks about for the next week or two.

It's a flurry to try and get things rescheduled, have projects pushed back or dropped all together as your belly starts to curve outward, becoming harder and harder to hide as the weeks go by. You and Austin had made an agreement to not announce a single thing before 12 weeks. It wasn't a guarantee nothing would go wrong but it put you in a safer territory than you would be if you announced earlier. Austin argues every so often that you shouldn't make an announcement, not because he doesn't want people to know but because he's so fiercely protective over your private life with him beyond what the two of you have to show that exposing your child to this nonsense fills him with dread. He worries about the judgment he figures you'll get over having a baby like this. Worries about how if you want to book something short that people may look at your belly and realize that it's not worth it. Maxwell and Simon, your agents and managers and pseudo dads rolled into one promise to get you just one more thing even if you'll have an obvious belly for them because they care about you and your career almost if not more than Austin does.

You tell him- no, you explain to him that you can't do that, you can't go into hiding because you're pregnant. You want to be able to tell the world that you're carrying his baby, that your belly is growing because you told him you wanted a baby. This baby may not be their child, but they're your fans and what would you be without your fans? No, you have to announce it so that you can finally stop hiding in oversized hoodies and dresses tailored to hide your bump. Besides, you've been known to read the gossip blogs and the magazines while waiting for your doctor's appointments. You know very well there's theories as to what's going on and how people find it suspicious you've gone from full body shots on instagram to above the waist shots. There's theories about why you had to drop out of a film that you'd be filming while nine months pregnant and ready to pop if you did. This is the only real way to put them to rest.

"Looking forward to this little one and I having many more mother's days to come. Your daddy and I can't wait to meet you." is the caption you go with on Mother's day with Austin's hands and your hands on your stomach. The comments make you cry though if Austin asks you're only crying because of the hormones. Not because of your little Elvis family bombarding your comments with congratulations or the way any negative comments get overwhelmed by happier comments. Even Kaia and Vanessa say congratulations and you feel something in your chest loosen at the knowledge. You feel the fear that had gripped your heart deep down that whispered how you'd have to hide this pregnancy like you hide your submission to Austin- like you hid your relationships with your other doms- disintegrate and evaporate into thin air.

Austin knows the second he sees your smile and sees your response to a few messages that he's doomed, he's lost the fight of getting you to remain a little more private about the pregnancy. Truthfully he's just thankful you agree with him that the two of you are going to try your absolute hardest to keep the baby themselves out of the limelight. And - as he murmurs, cupping your growing bump one night- their three siblings. Your feed is split between promoting your new project, random other things you'd do and posts about your growing bump, your occasional sickness and how pregnancy isn't really all it's cracked up to be even when you want a baby.

It comes to a head one day when you're seven months pregnant with your big long baby that Austin felt the need to gift you with all his height genes and you're posting something about how this week has just been rough.

"I'm not speaking for everyone, obviously, and all you infertility moms can tell me I'm wrong, but for me- I'm- society gives us all some rose tinted glasses when it comes to pregnancy and from what some of you guys have told me, motherhood." You sigh, wincing as your daughter kicks your rib cage and does this somersault that has your stomach rolling and twisting. "I want more kids but- this hurts. This hurts and I feel huge and I can't breathe sometimes because they're pressing on everything and I know you guys have seen the pap photos, I can't even really hug Austin right any more."

Austin for his part knows better than to interrupt when he hears you talking to yourself and despite his better judgment waits outside your shared bedroom door until he hears words that stop his heart.

"It's selfish, I guess, but I worry sometimes that he doesn't- he isn't going to like me nearly as much when the baby comes out. We've all heard about how guys do that and Austin's but- I don't know. I'm being melancholy and that's not what you signed up for today." You lift up your shirt to show your bump as your daughter does another roll that you manage to catch on camera. "I guess they wanted to show off at the expense of mommy. You are definitely your father's kid."

When it's been silent for a few minutes and he hears you grunt in pain he finally walks inside the room to see you standing in front of the mirror, cupping your bump before running your hands over your chest. There's a part of him in the back of his head that finds the action arousing beyond belief but he sees the look on your face and sees how you're playing with your necklace as the hand that was on your breast moves up. You're so engrossed in looking at your body and allowing your mind to whisper things to you that you don't notice Austin until he's up behind you and his hands are lifting up your belly just so.

"Oh, Aus- Fuck, Daddy, keep your hands there." You moan, the relief palpable in your tone. "That feels so good, she's been-"

"Growing too fast and too big for my little Dove?" Austin's tone is light and playful has he kisses your neck, watching the two of you in the mirror. "The joys of having me as the other half of the genes. Two more months and then she's out of you and you're free until the next one."

Your jaw tenses just a little at the words. It's not that you don't want another baby but who's truly to say he's going to want you enough to make one. The silence after his joke is what makes Austin pause and has him kissing at your jaw. "What's wrong?"

Because something is wrong and you have to communicate with him, if you need something you need to tell him, that's always been the rule in your relationship. A sigh leaves your lips. "There's- you're not going to find me attractive-" you pause and try to take a breath before the first thought that comes to your mind leaves your mouth in a rush. "Elvis didn't like Priscilla after she had Lisa."

Austin drops your belly gently against your protests and turns you to face him while shaking his head, taking your head in his hands. "Dove. Don't- we're not them, remember?"

"I know that!" You practically whine before rubbing at your eyes that are quickly filling with tears. "I know we're not! I know you're Austin and I'm me but I look and feel like a beached whale and my boobs are huge and will probably sag everywhere-"

Austin places his finger on your lips before shaking his head. "I'm going to stop you right there and tell you to look down." He watches you as your eyes slide down his torso and stop between his legs. He's- he's hard just from looking at you and touching you. There's his arousal staring you in the face in his grey sweatpants and you can't help but bite your lip. It twitches a little.

"You're- Daddy."

"I'm hard. You know how I've been the bigger you get. I thought you were attractive before but carrying my baby? Watching your belly swell and seeing your boobs escape every bra you put them in? Dove, if my dick had it's way you'd be pregnant every second you could be." He murmurs, allowing his hands to slide down your neck to your chest where he gives your breasts and nipples a squeeze before sliding down to your stomach. "And when this belly is gone? When our daughter is suckling at your chest? I'm going to remember that you did this. Going to remember how my wife grew our daughter and is feeding her from her own body still. I'm going to know that you're strong and perfect. And I'm going to remind myself we have a baby schedule to stick to. That I can't just immediately put another one inside of you."

His words cause a shudder to ripple through you and Austin smirks just a little, moving his hands down lower and lower, "Dove, if I put my hand between your legs how wet is it going to get?"

You feel your breath shakily leave your mouth. "Soaked. Please, Austin-"

A kiss cuts off your words as Austin's hand slides in between your leggings and your skin, inching ever so closer to where he's ignited a fire. He pulls away just a hair and shakes his head. "Try again, lil Dove. Please who?"

The eyeroll you give him holds no malice but you can't help it even as your arousal threatens to overwhelm you. "Daddy, please."

"I'll always give my Dove what she needs," he murmurs, finally sliding his fingers inside of you with a low groan from both of you.

It's funny how after that night your sex life with Austin up until the end of your pregnancy became a little more intense. More frequent as if to reassure you any time the voice inside your head got too loud and any time every trick your therapists taught you failed. Austin loved you and there wasn't a single doubt about that. Even if there was, the way he was by your side throughout your labor with your daughter would have done away with any doubts. There wasn't much more you could ask for in a partner than what he did for you that day and what he does for you as you recover.

It's a week before any of you are ready to take a picture but you're thankful for Ashley recommending a good photographer for the newborn pictures despite Austin's protests that he could take his own. After all, you wanted him in some of them, and you didn't trust an autotaken picture for this. When it comes time for Austin to post that your daughter's been born he goes for a simple picture that shows your hand on top of Austin's and Loretta's on yours with a simple caption: isn't she lovely, isn't she wonderful.

He saves the other photos for you to post.

[magical-regical]

Continuing my L&DS hyperfixation but also because Owl City just released a new single, here are some owl city songs that remind me of each LI and Caleb

Go under the cut if you want some extremely long commentary on why I picked the songs I did. If you don't care what I have to say, please peruse this TLDR;

Xavier: If My Heart Was a House

Zayne: Car Trouble

Rafayel: My Muse, Rainbow Veins

Caleb: Hot Air Balloon, The Bird and The Worm

Ah you're still here. A few disclaimers before you continue:

Whenever I mention MC in this, I will be using she/her pronouns.

I haven't listened to every owl city song in existence and some songs didn't stick with me the way the songs listed here did so if you think my takes are garbage and I'm a big dumb stupid idiot for not considering the song you're thinking of, uh, feel free to make your own post abt it.

I know sweet f a abt music theory so I'm just going based off vibes and lyrics not composition.

I haven't read Xavier's or Zayne's myth stories to completion and haven't read Rafayel's at all.

Anyway, without further ado, enjoy my lukewarm takes.

Xavier

This song makes me so soft and it's way too easy to imagine Xavier and MC dancing to this. The first lines sound like he's reminiscing of the time he had with MC in her past lives,

You're the sky that I fell through, and I remember the view whenever I'm holding you

The sun hung from a string, looking down on the world as it warmed over everything.

Chills run down my spine as our fingers entwine and your sighs harmonize with mine.

Unmistakably, I can still feel your heart beat fast when you dance with me.

He pulls her in closer as the first pre-chorus plays. And the two pre-chorus' in this song sound like a conversation between him and his memory of past!MC.

The first one:

We got older and I should've known,

Do you feel alive?

That I'd feel colder when I walk alone

Oh, but you'll survive

The second one:

I walk slowly when I'm on my own

Do you feel alive?

Yea but frankly, I still feel alone.

Oh, but you'll survive

And then the chorus hits and the vibes are immaculate. It feels like you're floating on air and imagine how Xavier looks at MC when the last few lines play,

Risk it all 'cuz I'll catch you if you fall,

Wherever you go,

If my heart was a house, you'd be home.

Because she is the celestial body that orbits around him, his north, his guiding star, and his heart will always be her home.

Zayne

And you can't convince me this isn't one of the songs that plays at their wedding.

This is the catalyst of this post's creation. As of writing this, it's the newest single and I am obsessed with it. So strap in folks, I have a lot to say.

First of all, the first thirty seconds of this song was released as a preview titled 'Floppy Fish' that came out ten years ago and we didn't hear anything else about it until suddenly we get a tweet about it four days ago (as of writing this part) and then this masterpiece. I think it reflects Zayne and MCs relationship quite well, they were childhood friends, lost contact for a while, and now they're reunited to build another beautiful relationship.

On to the song itself, the overall song is about going back to see the person you love even through all sorts of car troubles. The car theme immediately screamed 'Zayne' to me because out of all the boys we see him drive MC around the most.

It's a very upbeat song which contrasts Zayne's stoic personality but the whole song is something I can imagine actually happening to him.

I see the first verse as Zayne trying his damndest to finish up work instead of having actual car troubles,

I've been driving all afternoon, but I hate to say it, I won't be there soon = him working all afternoon and still having to do overtime

And though I'm late you know I just can't wait to come home to my slice of heaven on toast.

But my GrandPrix broke down without fail, another flat tire and another nail = the 'tire' being the hearts he has to operate on and 'another nail' referring to his surgeon's tools (even though the nail in the song is the thing that broke the tire in the first place not the thing fixing the flat)

I miss your smile but this could take a while 'cause this 'road closed' sign says there's no way around. = he can't just ditch work, obviously.

The second verse and chorus is him actually running out of gas on his way back from Akso and just describes his situation. Walking through the rain, only stopping to buy flowers for her.

Hey, it's kinda crazy what daisies jasmines can do.

And then these lines from the third verse,

I'd hand you a coffee right when you woke up

and

... all I find is all these highways wind and lead back to my slice of heaven on toast.

are so cute. Especially the 'slice of heaven on toast' thing since I imagine a slice of heaven on toast would taste sweet.

But wait, it gets better. Because the chorus that comes after goes,

Oh would your heart kind of glow if I held your hand and I promised to stay home?

Hey, when I blow in that's the first thing I'll do

It might take me forever

It might take me forever

But I love you forever and I can't wait to see you.

I'm dead. I'm deceased. I am a puddle of goo on the ground.

The bridge is the most upbeat part of the song and I imagine that's when he gets a call from MC because she's worried about him. Because honestly the line, 'Am I unavoidably detained or extremely fashionably late?' sounds like the kind of dry humor he'd enjoy.

And the song ends as he hangs up and continues his long journey on public transport to come home to her.

Rafayel

Now, fish boy gets two songs because I associate each one with what I like to call 'light mode' and 'dark mode' Rafayel.

I chose both songs because they had like, a lot of imagery involved in them and lean heavily into his whole artist job. So this isn't going to be as in depth as Zayne's lol.

Anyway,

This is light mode Rafayel. The whole song is him talking to MC. He's all happy-go-lucky and filled with inspiration. With how important color is to his current career the song just felt perfect.

The chorus also adds a few nice tidbits of his character,

Cheer up and dry your damp eyes, and tell me when it rains

And I'll blend up that rainbow above you and shoot it through your veins

'Cause your heart has a lack of color and we should've known

That we'd grow up sooner or later, 'cause we wasted all our free time alone

The first two lines sound like something he'd actually say when he's trying to comfort MC.

The line 'we wasted all our free time alone' sticks out to me because you ever notice this guy doesn't have any friends? Like, Xavier has Jeremiah and the countless old people he's made friends with when they're in their youth and Zayne has his coworkers at the hospital and his old profs. Raffy doesn't really have anyone like that? Sure he has Thomas and his Aunt Talia but judging by how fast they hung up on him after barely wishing him a happy birthday, I can't in good conscience call them his friends.

So yea maybe our boy was so focused on finding MC again he wasted all his free time alone.

Then we have dark mode Rafayel. And no I don't mean dark as in Rafayel when he's in revenge plot mode (whatever that is I don't have enough brain cells to comprehend what his plan could possibly be). I mean dark mode as in it's quite literally night time and he is left with nothing but his own thoughts. MC fell asleep at his place again and he's wistfully staring at her sleeping figure. This is the song in those moments.

Like Xavier, he's reminiscing about the past lives and past MCs. He's remembering the first time he met and the moment he decided she was the one. She was his bride. He's listing all the things he loves about her (which basically boils down to 'everything!'). She is his muse, now and forever.

And then the song ends with:

So I'll say it now before we're at the door that someday we'll walk through,

And if I'm the only one left in the room...

There's nowhere else I'd rather be than home with you.

Do you hear that? That's the sound of my heart cracking in two. He will sing you this last line as he pulls you closer, pressing your forehead against his before giving you a nice, long kiss.

Honorable mention goes to the song 'Sunburn' because it's about meeting someone, falling in love, and having to separate in the end (hence, 'she got a tan and I got a sunburn' and 'as we parted ways, she held my gaze and left an imprint on my mind'). I could go deeper and analyze each line like I did w/ Zayne but I've kept the Caleb girlies waiting long enough so we'll stop Raffy's part here.

Caleb

Caleb also gets two songs I chose two songs that have heavy 'childhood friends to lovers' vibes and fitting imagery and I told myself this one was gonna be short and sweet because we don't have as much depth abt his relationship w/ the MC compared to the current LIs but welp, I lied.

'Hot Air Balloon' is the most childhood friends song ever. Every single lyric is just every adventure these two went on when they were children. Writing their own fairy tales, making a racetrack around the kitchen chairs, going on a picnic to a nearby lake and getting a stomachache because you drank lake water even though Grandma Josephine told you specifically not to do that, the list just goes on and on.

It's them. It's little MC and Caleb with lightning in their veins and stars in their eyes as they explore the world around them, not a care in the world because the possibilities are quite literally endless when they have the other person by their side.

And then if 'Hot Air Balloon' was 'childhood friends—', 'The Bird And The Worm' adds on the '—to lovers' part of the trope.

I mean the entire first verse reads like the two kids playing pretend (because let's face it you've had one or two weirdly morbid play pretend sessions when you were a kid) with little Caleb saying he's the bird because of his evol and then little MC's like "then what does that make me?" And little Caleb's like "you're the worm ofc!"

Esp the part about throwing a party and greeting undersea friends (hi Raffy). I could imagine little MC telling little Caleb how she's going to invite the mermaid she made friends with at the beach to their 'party' and Caleb just not having any of it.

I'll throw a party and greet my undersea friends

(it depends)

As they arrive,

(if they arrive)

Then the chorus reads like a time skip. They're adults reminiscing about their childhood at one of the rare moments their schedules align,

You and I left our troubles far behind,

But I still have just one more question on my mind

For all my pals who live in the oceans and the seas

With friends like these well, who needs enemies?

In that moment they're back to being just MC and Caleb, not a hunter and a fighter pilot. And the last two lines sound like they're trading workplace gossip. Caleb tells her about the shenanigans his colleagues get up to and MC telling him about all the...'quirky' people she's been running into (hi Xav) and then being cheeky and going 'with friends like these, who needs enemies?'

And then you move to the second verse and it's them on a date. It's them on the most damn wholesome date you can imagine, I'm sorry I don't make the rules.

Like first they go apple picking,

If I'm your boy, we'll take a short cut we remember and we'll enjoy—

—picking apples in late September like we've done for years.

We'll take a long walk through the cornfield and I'll kiss you between the ears.

Then they come home and cook together (maybe make a pie with the apples they just picked or some other apple based dish?),

And as we twirl, the glow in the dark stars on your ceiling will shine for us

If you're my girl, swirl me around your room with feeling

As love sweeps over the room cuz' we tend to make, each other blush

(you make me blush)

They're so used to each other's presence even in a kitchen that can be considered a little cramped, they can perfectly navigate around each other.

After the two had eaten a delicious dinner, they are now cuddled on the couch with a blanket over the two of them, some movie playing on the TV. MC starts nodding off so Caleb picks her up and moves her to the bedroom, letting her snuggle against him. He brushes some loose strands of hair away so he can kiss her forehead,

"Love ya pipsqueak, sleep well."

And before drifting off he hears MC mumble a sleepy "I love you too..."

And that's how their perfect day ends.

You're the bird, I'm the worm and it's plain to see,

That we were meant to be.

----------------------------------------------------------

Author's rambling

Haaaa, I finally finished it yay! If you're reading this, thanks for reading this far! (or if you're a Caleb stan and just decided to read his part only, hello!)

I hope you enjoyed my takes. This was fun, I loved breaking down each song and just rambling my heart out over why each song gives me vibes for which character.

[cannibalovers]

Hannibal song of the day : song no. 5

a bit about the song:

"Breezeblocks"(released in 2012) is song by alt-J, written by Thom Sonny Green, Gwilym Sainsbury, Gus Unger-Hamilton & Joe Newman(the whole group), most likely their most popular song. It starts off mellow and quiet guitar, interchanging between build ups and drops with synthesisers and a lot of deep bass, drums and other percussion instruments till the end of the song, which ends with an arrangement of overlapping vocals, like a choir. It fits genres like indie rock, indie pop, art rock and folktronica. The song itself tells a story of two lovers, where one of them wants to leave the relationship, feeling unsafe and unfulfilled but the other is obsessive and deranged and so in love that they don't let the other leave, the desire and love being so strong that they dare to hurt their lover and themselves just to make them stay. There can be another meaning to the song when taking the music video into the account(that the group themselves said is kind of different but managed to fit the vibe), which is filmed in reverse, presenting a narrative where a man kills a woman(maybe an ex or smth) who was most likely keeping his wife hostage. Since the chain of events is presented in reverse, it looks as if the man is the abusive lover trying to kill his wife, although by the end we find out he was actually defending his wife and killed the woman that kidnapped his wife, sending a message to not judge a book by its cover - don't assume and judge until you know the full story. It also references a book "Where the Wild Things Are" by Maurice Sendak, talking about a young boy who misbehaved badly at home and got scolded for it. His hostile and intense emotions sent him to an imaginary jungle with creatures called "The Wild Things". In this world, he feels appreciated and powerful as the wild things make him a king, but as soon as he realises the responsibilities a king has are hard, he wants to leave and go back home, to his loving mother who took care of him and coudl depend on, but the creatures don't want him to leave, threatening cannibalism (woah i wonder why I am writing this), saying "Oh, please don’t go! We’ll eat you whole! We love you so!". The band thought of it as a very powerful image and referenced these words in the song. In the end, the boy does manage to get away, unlike the lover of this song.

yeah sorry for the long intro to the song um. i've loved this song for years I swear I could listen to it forever so.

overall the song creates such a chilling mix between aggression and affection it's just so fucking insane and well. very hannigram. I think that was expected. Tbh i feel like it's prob known to fannibals, i made a post once asking ppl for song recommendations for hannibal and this song has shown up a few times and honestly? it fits them SO. WELL. especially when you think about the whole mizumono episode. The music video reminded me of mizumono a lot... so I'll be basing this on that episode a lot...

Pardon me for the pain i'm gonna provide today<3

------------------------------

Verse 1

"She may contain the urge to run away But hold her down with soggy clothes and breezeblocks"

The girl doesn't want to be in the relationship with the man anymore, maybe recognizing that he is not in a good state of mind or she just believes they're not fit for each other anymore, whichever it is, she is contemplating getting out of the relationship, which she feels trapped in, or the man feels like he's scaring her away, hence her "running away"; He doesn't like this, being way too attached for her, he can't just let her run away after the comfort she brought him and the strong emotions he developed towards her, so he decided to weigh her down (literally) by drowning her with breezeblocks. Metaphorically, Breezeblocks are blocks used for building houses and are supposed to represent foundation here, so perhaps he has been making her stay by guilt tripping her about everything that they have built together and the fact that she can't just "leave behind" the trust, support, stability and safety that they have gained from each other - the foundation of their relationship. After she wasn't giving her idea of leaving up, he decided to actually weight her down with their foundation in forms of breezeblocks. In my eyes, the soggy clothes could also have a little bit of meaning, soggy clothes being quite uncomfortable and probably clinging to her(just like he does) - perhaps they're soggy from the times he was guilt tripping her, perhaps tears were shed and her clothes getting soggy just represent the manipulation and fakeness of them, or the severity of the situation and how long it has been going on and how this has affected her (made her feel heavy at heart and uncomfortable)

I think these lyrics summarise THE monologue in Mizumono and hannigram's plans quite perfectly. Will wanting to run away (from hannibal unfortunately...) and as Hannibal realised his plan of betrayal, reacted very aggressively by literally gutting him (sogging his clothes with blood ig) and breaking down the foundation they have built, more or so with words, but also the knife he uses. At this point I have no idea if its a linoleum knife (knife used for building, houses, rugs and FOUNDATIONS OF A BUILDING.) or a kerambit or smth else but I'll stick to the linoleum here(also check out this post about his choice for the knife, it drives me fucking insane) and say that this is how Hannibal tears down the foundation they have built together. Not only does he gut him, he talks to Will about how betrayed he feels that he was planning to leave him, after letting Will see him, after building this foundation of trust and support for each other. Hannibal was there, understanding Will and offering support and stability and he saw that Will could provide it for him back, which he chose to do only to get closer to him to betray him and take away his happiness (Will...) and stable, carefully crafted life he had. Will was something very important to Hannibal, a person that changed him and made him feel love for once, and then he lied about accepting him. He can't handle losing Will so he would make him stay and tear him down, hurt him, if that's what it would take.

"Cetirizine, your fever’s gripped me again Never kisses, all you ever send are fullstops (La la la la)"

Citrizine is a medicine used for fevers, suggesting the man is so obsessed with her that she makes him ill and stressed (overheated and overwhelmed and overthinking, hence the fever) and he needs medicine. She is constantly rejecting him, rejecting his affections and never giving any to him but instead stopping him, although it can also allude to texts, her not ending them with "xx" (kisses) but with full stops, being quite cold and distant with him.

well first, for the show it can allude to how Hannibal literally gave Will a fever and the amount of aspirin Will took cuz of that if we take this literally, but that mean the roles would have to switch so, instead in my eyes I think of how bothered and overwhelmed Will probably made Hannibal feel the more interested and obsessive he got over Will. I can't imagine how many times this man probably thought of him everyday and overthought stuff (jesus seriously hes obsessed) and how ill and diseased (although alive) Hannibal probably felt (maybe diseased and ill after he knew Will's plan...); the affections the girl is rejecting from her lover could represent how distant Will was with Hannibal at first.

"Do you know where the wild things go? They go along to take your honey (La la la la)"

This is a reference from the book "Where the Wild Things Are". The band suggested that the lyrics are about jealousy, the protagonist being jealous of other people who are catching his lovers attention instead of him, maybe this is a conversation between them about this concern, telling his lover that those people are bad and will use her and leave her(take away her honey); Maybe he's trying to convince her that he would never do that - although he technically is, eating away at whatever support and love(the honey) she has to offer for him.

I feel like this presents why Hannibal decided to isolate Will in the first place, taking away everything from him (or at least how he wants Will to see it, as we know that he was just trying to make his plan come true and return some of the things Will cared about so much). He saw everything that Will had interest in (Alana, Abigail, although he kept her for Will, Margot's child etc) as a threat to his plan of having Will all to himself and so he took them away - because he believed that they were both bad for Will but also because they were not in Hannibal's best interest. Also doesn't he like kill Will's wife in season 3 idk yet dont tell me

"Break down, now weep, build up breakfast Now let’s eat, my love, my love, love, love (La la la la)"

This probably references the many fights the couple had and protagonist's method of trying to make it up to her by trying to get back into a loving, normal routine, forgetting the fights, doing things such as letting her sleep it off and making a breakfast, starting the day over - The breakfast being his love for her. This is most likely to say that acts of service for her would be his love language and he would feel loved if she accepted his services, as well as offerings(his love) he makes for her.

for Hannibal:

do i like. have to explain this one

first of all lets be real cooking and making ppl commit accidental cannibalism is his love language (even better when they are aware of it and accept it knowingly so u dont have to make them commit accidental cannibalism to feel like u're normal for enjoying it and ure not a monster and God didn't punish u by making u eat ur own sister and enjoy it and that they accept and understand u for this and are def not doing it as a manipulation tactic to get u closer to them... that's not smth Will would do to Hannibal wdym)

------------------------------

Chorus

"Muscle to muscle and toe to toe The fear has gripped me, but here I go My heart sinks as I jump up Your hand grips hand as my eyes shut And I, ah-ah-ah-ah"

The chorus seems to depict the the physical fight going between the two lovers. The protagonist doesn't seem to be in his right mind as he says that even though the fear tried to stop him, he has lost control and is now hurting his loved one (or himself) - His fear of rejection making him not handle this situation well and taking the last leap of faith to "save" the relationship by physically forcing her into it. The harm can either be to himself or her, maybe threatenening suicide and her gripping his hand to stop him, or him hitting her and her trying to deflect his hand with her own.

For Hannibal, it's literally,,gutting Will. Or any physical fight or holding each other at gun point or any murder attempt they had. In mizumono, Hannibal is visibly heartbroken by Will's decisions, maybe regretting the choices hes about to take. Maybe for once he felt some fear hurting another person, the person being Will, but he pushes through it, knowing it had to be done, to show Will how he made him feel. The physical contact in this chorus could represent the hug that they shared (the most heartbreaking hug in tv history). His feelings seem to contrast with the violence in that scene so much it makes me so fucking depressed

------------------------------

Verse 2

"[...}She bruises, coughs, she splutters pistol shots Hold her down with soggy clothes and breezeblocks"

The words have a violent imagery to them, maybe to show the lover fighting back and still not agreeing to stay, maybe even trying to hurt him, her words feeling like pistol shots to him, or it could represent her drowning, trying to catch a breath. If that's what is happening, then he tries to remind himself of his point and to not help her, because she will run away - it's better to hold her down and make her stay.

Will's most common weapons is a gun or his hands and words, so i guess it fits his image quite well(not to mention the amounts of time he held Hannibal at gun point lol). These clearly never seemed to have affected Hannibal (until the last supper) and he continues through with his plan of taking everything away from Will, showing what he has lost by not staying by Hannibal's side.

"She’s morphine, queen of my vaccine My love, my love, love, love (La la la la)"

The protagonist compares her to morphine, a drug used to help with pain - clearly he is very dependent on her and uses her for emotional stability and support, losing that would make him insecure and breakdown, he can't lose her after the vulnerability he shared with her. This also fits with the expression "Love is a drug", which to him, her love is clearly like a drug, he has become obsessed, needing her love all the time, addicted to her, suggesting the intensity of emotions she makes him feel and just how obsessed he is - that's why he can't let her go.

The contrast between the dark, violent and destructive comparisons he makes of her, ignoring those destructive feelings and calling her his "love" really deepens the juxtaposition between aggression and affection the song potrays and shows just how blind the protagonist is.

I feel like this fits Hannibal's feelings about Will quite well, considering how obsessed he is with him, to the point of destruction and isolating him to have him all to himself (and also the fact that my man was CRYING after putting Will in prison, missing their therapy sessions. LIKE BITCH). He really puts Will high up on a pedestal, suggesting just how important and addictive Will is to him and how dependent he has become on Will after opening up to him, maybe even feeling like Will numbs his pain and loneliness of never being accepted for who he actually was.

------------------------------

Verse 3

"[...]Germolene, disinfect the scene, my love, my love, love, love But please don't go, I love you so, my lovely"

This is the aftermath of the protagonist killing his lover. He realises that he killed her, getting an anticeptic(clearly unprepared for this and panicking, using some at-home antiseptic instead of something proper) to disinfect the scene off of his DNA. The realisation quickly hits him of what he has done, making him spiral into a breakdown as he realises that his actions didn't make her stay, they made her dead forever.

Hannibal clearly doesn't disinfect the scene in mizumono, he doesn't even wear his plastic suit or use the cloth that he always uses to not leave finger prints, there was no point in hiding anything anymore, Will helped FBI see through him, although we do see him "cleansing" himself off of the events by walking in the rain and trying to "comfort" Will, telling him to "wade into the quiet of the stream". I don't think these specific lyric apply to the situation much disinfection-wise, although it can represent Hannibal's state of mind, especially after realising everything he has done and the regret that came with it(does he feel guilty tho? i have no idea but the begging and love confessions in this line def represent his obsession and love for Will which left him very heartbroken after everything that was done)

also could represent Will........ him wanting to turn back, if he could only reverse time, undo the events so Abigail lives and everyone else lives..............ouch

------------------------------

Refrain

"Please don't go, please don't go I love you so, I love you so Please don't go, please don't go I love you so, I love you so Please break my heart (Hey!) Please don't go, please don't go I love you so, I love you so Please don't go, please don't go I love you so, I love you so Please break my heart[...]"

the most beautiful part of the song in my opinion tbh. The layers, the build up, the overlapping vocals, it's all just so overwhelming and emotional and vulnerable.

the protagonist spirals, realising what he has done but not wanting it to be true, he's not ready yet to let go of his lover, slowly, he's losing self control and giving into his violent desires, he threatens cannibalism if she goes away(she can't really do anything my dude...) as he frantically confessse to her that he loves her. He just loves her so much and needs her so much, the desire is so strong that he will consume her if it means that she stays right beside him(or inside him), craving that impossible closeness, it's a way to forever remain with a loved one. This whole refrain is just so incredibly contradicting and depressing and desparate its insane

now, it's no secret that Hannibal doesn't want to let Will go and even consume him. He wants him to live but at the same time he wants to taste him, devour him. To love is to consume, but to consume is to devour and transform in reusable energy. He wants him as close as possible and for Will to accept his desires and give himself up, let him be his - but clearly that's not what Will wanted (yet).

...This one is so straightfoward especially considering Hannibal that I don't even know what to say really. The song itself just says it all perfectly.

in conclusion they are fucking insane for this and breezeblocks is the ultimate hannigram (specifically mizumono) song. 11/10

------------------------------

additional notes:

was so excited for this one but i actually wrote less than i thought wow but maybe thats also cuz most of the song repeats. or im tired

idk if its cuz i literally dont know how to explain cannibalism as a metaphor of love or why but. at the same time the song just describes pretty well on its own

------------------------------

my playlist

hope you enjoyed and thanks for reading<3

[carionto]

Making everything canon is gonna bite me, oh well - time to steal from H.P. Lovecraft!

All the little pieces of writing I've done are part of the same verse I'm cobbling together. My brain is like an army of chimps with rocks on typewriters. I probably don't have the capacity to keep everything in mind and consistent, but I think attempting to do so would be a good mental exercise. I have decided, at least for now, not to describe or name any aliens, they just serve as a perspective character to witness Humans being an exaggerated version of themselves, and as a means to give Humanity something more to do. At least I have put in some restrictions - no time travel for one, that's a mess even good writers struggle with, and I'm just some random scribbler. But, I think I want Cthulu as well. I mean, I sorta already have something similar with the in-between vague monster, but I don't know what I'll do with that, and I want a more concrete thing, so it's happening:

____________________________________

In the lowest pits below the surface that lies beneath the endless pressure of the watery grave, a rumbling disturbs a being deeper still in a slumber from before the counting of eons.

It does not wake so easily though.

Many more thumps and bumps and thwacks and booms scarcely make their way down the webway of cracks and tunnels and caves and crevices that stretch across this insignificant pale blue dot.

It cares for not one of them.

A flicker unlike all others. One being stares at another. Still slumbering, yet fully aware and staring back. For such beings eternities pass by without notice, and moments of import last beyond the span of the cosmos within the confines of their impossible minds.

Neither blink. The flicker ends, and so does their contest.

Gently nudged by a bigger boom, then a small hole appears and begins to vent some soothing pressure. Disturb any beings rest and the consequences are dire, this one has yet to decide to awaken. Yet another flicker soon after, will the other dare stare at it again?

No. The other gazes at nothingness, past the being.

What is over there?

Many nothings. So many as to make the whole less than nothing. Perhaps a something that should be a nothing. Now the nothings are spreading out, the whole becoming closer to nothing yet again. Then a distant something is beginning to end before it should. Now an eye gently opens just a little. These matters are for beings to decide and no others.

Who is acting out of turn?

_____________________

Relevant stories for context: Disturbances The "flicker" Something is ending

[wormswurld]

hey dude! i love love love your posts! I dont wanna come across as pushy or anything but i loved the ftm oliver headcanons, and i would love to see how felix helps him and such! Not to mention, i know a lot of people love asshole felix, but I physically cannot get over sweet and loving felix oml its amazing!! thank u sm!! 🩷🩷

you're not pushy at all!! i've actually been meaning to write more ftm ollie but ive been so swamped w schoolwork and different asks / projects etc but i got u!! also sweet love-y dovey felix is my fave felix, he is a big sweetie when it comes to his ollie 😇💖 !!!!!!!!!!!

- after felix finds out abt ollie being trans everything goes pretty smoothly! he helps ollie w his t-shots, bandging him up and disposing of the needles in the sharps bin etc,, tho one time ollie forgets to take his t-shot and he gets his period and he feels Awful... absolutely isolating himself from felix and hiding in his room as felix, fairleigh, and venetia enjoy the hot summers sun outside of his window...he just feels too dysphoric to go out of his way to talk to anyone let alone felix (the literal love of his life he came out to yet still feels obligated to keep him uninformed abt the things that happen to him etc...)

- soon enough felix has enough of being shut out by ollie so he goes to confront him but he finds ollie curled in a ball on the bathroom floor :( poor ollie is probably crying as he grips at his stomach his cramps are unbelievably painful and he feels so stupid that he forgot to take his shot,, obviously being worried felix instantly rushes to ollie's side, petting his hair and softly hushing him as he inquires what's wrong..."oh ollie, ollieollieollie what's wrong mate, you okay? you hurt?" and all ollie can do is nod his head as he just clutches his stomach harder curling more and more into himself until he is fully in fetal position..."hey, what is it? what's hurting ollie, can you show me?" and ollie just mutters out the words "period" and felix completely understands,, he's grown up around venetia so hes definitely semi-well versed in this sort of thing

- opening his mouth to then quickly close it felix nods his head in silent agreement "right, right, yeah" he says now rubbing small circles on the small of ollie's back, he's seen his mom do this to venetia all the time whenever she would have her cramps so he figured this could do the trick, at least in this very moment...."okay ollie, im gonna run and get some things from venetia i'll be right back okay? i'll just be a second mate" and felix plants a little kiss atop ollie's head as he quickly sprints out of the bathroom, loud footsteps being heard as he makes his away around the house,, soon after he comes back to the bathroom holding two large boxes of pads & tampons in one arm and 5 different kinds of pain medications in the other. and ollie can do is smile because he's never had anyone care about him like this. "i didn't know which ones you used... o-or if one was better than the other so i just brought the whole cabinet with me" felix chuckles as he sits down, now situating the items he brought with him next to ollie's curled up form

- "i-is this okay? i can always go run back and get-" and felix just gets cut off by ollie throwing his once curled arms around felix's middle holding him as tight as he could as if this might be the last time he'll ever see felix again,, and ollie just starts to cry because his hormones are going crazy but seeing felix so caring and eager to help him makes his heart melt !!!!! hes never experienced love like this before and its so new and foreign to him he doesn't know how to react !!!!! but its as if felix read his mind because he starts to caress ollie's wet cheek, slowly prying him away from his damp shirt so he could hold him in his lap..."ollie, its okay, you're okay with me yeah? this doesn't make me think any less of you alright? you're still my ollie, my boy, and nothing's gonna change that" and felix just brushes ollie's tears away before softly kissing him on the lips.

[sk1fanfiction]

@theartfuldodger26 Your post made me laugh (in a good way) so I had to write something based off it but I don't know if I'll ever finish it so I've decided to just post what I have instead of condemning it to Notes app purgatory.

OG post: “So, there're three options for the teenaged Bella/Tom dynamic. Bella is hideously bigoted towards him and he completely ignores her (until they fuck), OR Bella is hideously bigoted towards him and he is extremely cool with her (until they fuck), OR Bella is hideously bigoted towards him and they argue often (until they fuck).“

Bellatrix Black takes it upon herself to be hideously bigoted towards the sole half-blood (maybe Mudblood) in Slytherin House. Tom Riddle can’t risk detention, so he chooses the cloak-and-dagger method to get back at her. Why do they care so much about each other’s opinions, anyway?

Of course, the last thing Tom Riddle should be doing right now is messing with the blasted Head Girl.

For one, the whole school (except him) is terrified of her, and for very good reason. Bellatrix Black is a witch of formidable power, great intelligence and pride, and a furious temper. And if she catches him placing a very nasty and elaborate curse on her favourite quill, he’ll be the next subject of her ire. That will lead to a duel, and Tom can’t afford to have a detention on his perfect record. All the same, he can’t let her insults go unpunished.

She started it, Tom thinks, shaking his head. She always does. 

Last night, before they went on patrol, Tom accidentally knocked her bottle of ink over, and she took it upon herself to leap from her chair to call him a ‘filthy, lying, thieving Mudblood,’ in front of the whole common room no less. Red had swum before Tom’s eyes as she ranted about how disgusting and dirty he was, and how he didn’t deserve to be at Hogwarts, much less in Slytherin House, eyes flashing, and it had taken every ounce of his composure and even Occlumency to keep his lips pressed tightly together, bite his tongue, and ignore her. Oh, how he’d itched to tell her it was her own fault for leaving her ink unattended at the very edge of the table, or, better yet, to challenge her to a duel.

And then, he’d headed deep into the dungeons so no one could hear him, and screamed, just so he could blow off enough steam to have some patience left for their patrol.

One of Bellatrix’s younger sisters, Andromeda, had given him a sort of guilty look upon his return. But that did absolutely nothing to quell Tom’s fury.

And so, here he is, indulging in a fit of petty revenge, that scratches an itch neither Calming Draught nor nicotine ever can.

No one, not even Abraxas Malfoy, gets under Tom’s skin the way Bellatrix does, but he can’t let her know that she has that power over him. And given that Abraxas is three years Tom’s elder, attacked him at night, and made it his personal mission to make Tom’s life hell as soon as he suspected Tom to be Muggle-born, while Bellatrix has only gone as far as to be over-the-top verbally abusive, that doesn’t make sense.

Maybe it’s his increased exposure to Dark magic over the years. Irritability is the most well-known and common side effect.

No use pondering it. He speaks the last bit of the incantation, then stands up slowly and quietly. It’s three in the morning, and everyone in the girls’ dormitory is fast asleep. Tom, having grown up in an orphanage (thank God he doesn’t have to go back, ever again) is well-versed in the act of sneaking around without rousing anyone from their slumber. 

As he tiptoes towards her bookbag to replace the quill, Tom notices that the curtains around her bed are not fully shut. He glowers at her sleeping form — long, thick hair splayed out across the green pillowcase, a slight frown on her forehead, her mouth slightly open. The thought of hexing her in her sleep doesn’t cross his mind — cursing her items is one thing, but attacking an unconscious person is just cowardly and therefore utterly below him. Instead, Tom’s mind finds itself drawn to the surprising thought that, when she’s not insulting his supposed blood status, Bellatrix Black is actually quite beautiful. He has to confess that he never understood what Mulciber and the others were on about during their girl-crazy phase (upon reflection, they’re still in that phase). But now, he feels the cold-hot-cold fire of hatred mix with… something else unknowable, as he stares at her.

She stirs a little in her sleep, and Tom freezes. Why didn’t he think to use a Disillusionment Charm?

Luckily, she falls back into a deep sleep, and Tom hastily makes his escape. When he shuts the door between him, he’s sweaty and breathing hard, cold adrenaline racing through his veins. His legs feel shaky.

Silently, he makes his way back to the seventh-year boys’ dormitory, where the sound of Mulciber’s snoring instantly embraces him. It’s late, and he’s got N.E.W.T. Transfiguration with Dumbledore in the morning, so Tom gets into bed, pulls the sheets over his head, and hopes for dreamless sleep.

:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ✧.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ✧

The ambient sounds of the dormitory are the first thing to greet Bellatrix in the morning, before she even opens her eyes. For some reason, she had a strange dream last night, of a figure looming over her.

Probably nothing. Bellatrix doesn’t go in for all that Divination nonsense, anyway. Her N.E.W.T.’s are coming up; it’s expected that she would experience some symptoms of stress.

As long as I do the House of Black proud, she thinks, sitting up, locating her hairbrush, and attending to the knots her hair has accumulated from tossing and turning all night. 

By the time she is done with her toilette, her hair is glowing with a glossy sheen, her tie has been done up, and her Head Girl badge neatly pinned to her robes. She points her wand at her perfume bottle, lifting her hair from behind her ears as it hovers there, dousing her in a light cloud of scent. 

She’s the first to leave the dormitory, some of the other girls still asleep, their curtains still drawn shut. No matter, she can take points later if necessary.

The seventh-year Slytherin boys are just ahead of her as she slips out of the common room and into the dark dungeon hallway — the Head Boy, Tom Riddle’s soft, silky tenor carries further than the deeper voices of the others, and Bellatrix sneers at his unpleasant accent besmirching the halls of Hogwarts. He sounds like a barrow-boy, and when they pass the group of boys, she makes sure to tell him exactly that.

“Who do we have here?” Bellatrix places her hands on her hips, and advances forward, everyone but Riddle shrinking back. “Riddle, I was thinking,”  she adds sweetly, “with the way you sound— don’t you have apples to sell in a wheelbarrow?”

Some of the boys behind him titter, hurrying to suppress their laughter.

But Riddle ignores her, as usual, not even blinking, the corners of his mouth and his eyebrows perfectly steady, though he shifts his feet uncomfortably, as if to attempt to hide his shabby but nicely-polished shoes. Bellatrix looks him up and down again, scanning him for more faults — she has no idea why riling him up amuses her so, but she’s not one for self-denial.

She can’t fault the rest of his appearance — his robes, like his books, may be secondhand, but everything is folded and creased and ironed impeccably; even the Head Boy badge is immaculately polished and gleams in the light. Not a strand of his jet-black hair is out of place, neatly gelled back, and not a hint of five o’clock shadow is visible, which is more than she can say for most of the seventh-year boys.

It is then that Bellatrix realises she has effectively been ogling Tom Riddle, who stares back at her impassively. How she hates that impassive, cold stare, made even worse by the innocent sloe-eyes. 

“Nothing to say?”

He shakes his head slowly and deliberately, and then breezes past her without a word. Bellatrix turns on her heel as she watches his retreating back, her blood boiling. 

She will make him break. She knows how to push everyone’s buttons (but not his, apparently). She will make him snap, like when he duelled Abraxas in their common room in the fourth year, his glorious rage and (though she loathes to admit it) sheer power intrigued Bellatrix, and, by Morgana, she will see Tom Riddle’s composure break again, and she will be the cause and witness.

Yes, she thinks, as she enters the Great Hall. She will push Tom Riddle, that hateful, dirty Mudblood, right to the edge, and find the true source of his mysterious power, that he definitely shouldn’t have.

[spacedykensfw3]

Kinks, limits, and a little about me!

First things first, basic info:

My name is Max

I’m 26

I use they/it/he in my day to day life, but she/her and anything else are totally fine in a kink context!

I’m a nonbinary butch lesbian

I was on T from June of 2022 to like, February of 2024 and I will be back on it soon once I get my shit together lmao

I’m 5’10” and around 250lbs

I’m very submissive, and I’m a verse (don’t ask me to dom you, it won’t happen, I’m bad at it, and it’s really difficult for me lmao)

Now, the kinks and limits!

Hard kinks you will likely see on this blog:

Orientation play/dykebreaking, or otherwise being forced or coerced into being with men

Incest/fauxcest

“Hard” cnc/noncon/rapeplay

Less frequently, misgendering and forcefem as tied to my being a butch on T

Also less frequently, misogyny/patriarchy play

Absolute favorite kinks:

Orgasm denial

Edging

Anal

Piss & omorashi

Humiliation/degradation

Other things I’m into:

Nondage

Exhibition/voyeurism

Free use

CNC

Gangbangs

Fisting (even though I haven’t gotten there yet)

Body writing

Objectification

Forced orgasm/overstimulation

Breeding (without pregnancy, though I may share posts or fantasize about pregnancy occasionally)

A wide range of pain play including pussy & clit torture

Squirting (which I’ve done one (1) whole time and have yet to replicate, unfortunately)

Blackmail

Monsterfucking

Oviposition/alien pregnancy

Transformation (particularly gender fuckery, like gender swap pills)

Trans supremacy, particularly transfem supremacy

Things I’d like to try:

Hypno

Dumbification/bimbofication

Somnophilia

Catheter play

CNC around kidnapping

Intox play

Soft limits/maybes:

Piss drinking

Enema play (I am EXTREMELY mess averse when it comes to butt stuff despite having a huge anal kink so uh… yeah)

Anything that might risk getting caught by non-consenting party

Food in holes that aren’t my mouth (more likely to agree to this if it's going in my ass than my pussy, I don't want a yeast infection)

Tickling

Firm limits/almost definitely no:

Ass to mouth

Pet play

Blood

Diapers

Hard limits:

Feet

Scat

Vomit

Race play

Toilet play (ie licking the toilet or putting my head in toilet water or anything like that)

Some irl public stuff (depends on context & risk lol)

Cutting

Necro/snuff (just not my bag)

IRL bestiality (I am into monsterfucking and have plenty of knotted dildos so y'know)

Weight-based humiliation/degradation, food control, weight control, etc

Underage (which should be assumed, but I take this extremely seriously.)

This list is not exhaustive, and I'm sure I'll find new kinks I like and hate as time goes on. If something isn't on the list, just ask me, chances are I haven't even thought about it. If you have any questions at all, just ask! I don't bite (without consent).

A little bit more about me:

I'm a huge nerd, and if you follow my main, you know this. Star Wars, Mass Effect, LEGO, a litany of other interests because I have ADHD, you know how it goes.

Tangentially related, one of my long-time interests has been sex education, kink education, and sexual health. So, while I love being horny on the internet, I also love to answers questions about that kind of thing, so feel free to ask!

I'm typically pretty introverted, and I'm really terrible at keeping conversations going. If I haven't responded in a while, it isn't you, it's because I'm bad at being a person. Just nudge me.

[magpiefngrl]

Fic author self-rec

Rules: Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you’ve written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💙

Thank you for the tag @tenthousandyearsx a few weeks ago! I wanted to wait and get a couple of my WIPs ready and posted before doing it, but I'm now back to full time work so it's unlikely I'll finish those WIPs any time soon. 😢 So, here's 5 old fics of mine that I'm fond of. It's hard to choose a favourite, so I chose rather randomly, whatever popped in my head first tbh.

They're all drarry.

The Unquiet Grave (E, 21,5k, gothic vibes)

Quote: ‘What will happen is this. You’ll drag me to a poncy restaurant one evening soon, and I’ll complain about the number of forks and the size of the portions. Then I’ll drag you to my local and you’ll complain about the wine list and the clientele. This will be a recurring theme. But every time, every single time, we’ll end up in my bed — or yours — and I’ll make you forget your own name.’

My thoughts: I reread this yesterday after years, and I ended up really enjoying it. I particularly liked the dialogue in this read. I'm pretty happy with how this fic turned out. It's got a gothic mood and fits an autumnal mood; I often rec it for Halloween.

Sometimes a man needs (E, 5.5k, Flower Shop)

Quote: Harry knew what a huge mistake the whole thing was, but he’d already fallen for Malfoy, so what harm would a few more nights do? What harm would it do to kiss Malfoy some more and inhale his intoxicating smell? What harm was it that Malfoy spent almost every evening with Harry and whispered things in the dark that he never alluded to in the day? Harry was in love and in pain, but he might as well get what he could while he could.

My thoughts: I love the magical flower shop I created here, the types of flowers I came up with, and, craft-wise, I love Harry's voice. I remember I'd struggled with this fic, starting and deleting, starting and deleting, until I got a handle on Harry's voice and then it flowed in a morning.

The Gift (E, 29,5k, Captive Prince references)

Quote:  Draco’s desires — at least where Potter is concerned — are a tangle, messed up like he is. A war of contradictions: Draco wants to please Potter, and he wants to hurt him. He wants to see Potter in ecstasy, but he can’t allow himself to be the one to do it. So, he’s chosen another way, a way that gives and takes at the same time. ‘You’ve been such a good boy so far,’ Draco tells Potter and watches with pleasure his instant reaction, the blood colouring his face. ‘I think you deserve a treat for being so good. So… obedient. Which is why Adam here will give you a… gift.’

My thoughts: Used to have complicated feelings about this one. I'd hidden it for years and only revealed it a couple of months ago. Draco is a writer here and channels many of my doubts and insecurities. It's not a fic that has a wide appeal, not cute or fluffy at all, but I love my prose here and I had fun with inserting CaPri nods and writing excerpts of a magical CaPri story.

The Boy Who Died (E, 26.8k, Voldemort Wins AU)

Quote: At times he thought he noticed his own lust mirrored in Malfoy’s gaze, like when he cooked and Harry sat on the kitchen table, mouth and fingers sticky with treacle syrup or brown sugar, or when Harry left the shower in his pyjama bottoms, his hair soft like a waterfall down his bare shoulders. Harry had taken to sleeping topless; he couldn’t get used to Malfoy’s fancy pyjamas, and although Malfoy had looked extremely put out the first time, he didn’t object.

My thoughts: I'm just so fond of this one! I thought of the reincarnation plot because of wangxian and I peppered some wangxian Easter eggs in this fic, but I didn't expect to fall in love with this dystopian, Voldemort Wins 'verse. It's a bleak world but somehow this fic has become one of my comfort reads and I've reread it often since posting it.

Through the Looking Glass and What Draco Found There (E, 17.4k, Mirror of Erised alternate dimension)

Quote: Getting to know Harry was to love him: hearing him laugh at Weasley’s jokes, watching him sleep, witnessing his passionate devotion to what was right and the ardor with which he supported his friends. He had butterflies in his stomach just at the sight of him; a sentiment he attempted to hide under a mask of cool detachment, because if anyone found out, Draco would be kicked out of Slytherin for incurable soppiness.

My thoughts: I love the Mirror universe I came up with, and am proud of the treatment of the Shrieking Shack in this fic, which I haven't seen elsewhere. It's one of my works I'm most proud of. I didn't expect it'd be emotional, but I've received a bunch of comments, some of them very recently, saying it made readers cry. oops?

I'm guessing many of you have done the latest round of this author game. So, tagging everyone who hasn't done it and wants to! Would love to see the fics you rec and why xx