#i'll probably make like 8 sets to sell

[antidotesprout]

Ok, updated the hat pattern when working on Ingo and it looks a lot more proportional! I'll be remaking Emmet's, but I GOT MY TINY BOYS ���💖💖💖💖

[danieyells]

hi there,

thank you so much for all the voicelines you post !! if it’s okay, can i request subaru’s ?

thank you again !

You're welcome! At some point I might go back and put in the ones I leave out because they don't appeal to me as much lol but since i always end up posting 99% of them anyway I think it's enough for most people hahaha. It's all of them now! Sorry for the delay.

I WAS GONNA OMIT ONE OR TWO BECAUSE OF SPOILERS but eh i'll just warm for like. extra spoilers. since after doing more code peeking it wasn't the spoiler i thought it was. SUBARU IS A SWEETIE THOUGH. I also read Subaru's chats which were put in the code recently and. Man this guy needs anxiety meds. I have a small guess as to what his stigma is, but we'll learn in a few days anyway.

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"I'm very sorry to have kept you waiting. It's wonderful to see you again."

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"It looks like there's a notice for you. I'd be happy to go pick it up for you if you've got your hands full. Oh, forgive me if I'm overstepping."

oh no he's anxious about helping--

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"I really am so lucky to be surrounded by so many kind people like you."

"I never thought I'd get the chance to enjoy the lifestyle of a student until I came to Darkwick. Every day truly is fulfilling here."

it feels like subaru is like. . .the only one who actually enjoys school life here. . .or who really enjoys being here period lmao. . . .

"You think I'm always smiling? Ha ha, I hear that a lot. It just happens when I'm around all of you."

"I may be the captain, but it's just in name. I think Haku is much better suited for the job than me."

"I've been working since I was four, so people often said I was mature for my age. But the truth is, I've still got a lot to learn."

that makes two characters whose parents have essentially been keeping them from normal life and normal childhood for work reasons since they were four year olds. . . .

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"I tend to just have hot water for breakfast. I know it would be better for me to eat a proper meal, but it's just so much effort."

DO WE REALLY HAVE TO START WITH "I NEED THE GHOULS TO EAT PROPER FUCKIN MEALS". . . .

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I'm sorry I'm so late. The campus is so crowded I can never manage to walk in a straight line, so it always takes me longer than I think. Silly, isn't it?"

baby you're hardly the first person i've met with anxiety about crowds. you're fine.

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"What would I do without Haku's help? Hotarubi would be a mess without him."

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"I wonder if I should apply early to take out any common artifacts I might need for this mission. I'll ask Haku what he thinks..."

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Ah!  You surprised me there... I just got back from a small errand. Do you need something?"

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Ever since I was a child, the performing arts were my only focus. Maybe that's why people always say my mannerisms are so peculiar. It bothers you too, doesn't it?"

poor boy doesn't know how to act if he isn't acting. . .he doesn't know how to exist off-script. . .no wonder he made a deal with a demon. it's probably the first thing he's ever done for himself.

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I'd like to go to the cafeteria, but the line is always so long. I feel bad taking time to choose while people are waiting behind me. The bar of entry feels a little high."

i am once again suggesting subaru get anxiety meds. hell go to sinnostra and get some weed, i bet they sell that. i hear it can help.

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"I'm just about to go and meet a friend. I hate to inconvenience you like this, but if it's something urgent, could you speak to Haku about it instead?"

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"What am I going to do? We're supposed to be meeting up in an hour... If I cancel now, they'll hate me..."

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Whew... I'll walk you back to your house, {PC}. Oh, it's no problem at all, I assure you! I wanted some fresh air anyway."

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"I have an Anomalous Ecology test coming up. It's such a fascinating subject, I couldn't help but stay up all night studying. Now I'm a little sleep-deprived."

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I'm going to stretch my legs a little. I might not have a show to practice for right now, but I need to keep putting myself through my paces. I'll get rusty otherwise."

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"I'm sorry my phone's been making so much noise. I recently downloaded an app by mistake, and it won't stop sending me notifications..."

awww he's also technologically incompetent. . .poor guy was probably raised with such a heavy focus on his career he just. never needed a smartphone. anyone he needed to contact or who needed to contact him was probably always very close by. it sounds like he didn't even properly go to school before going to Darkwick. Somebody please take this boy on a walk. like anywhere. take him to a library. buy him a churro. can sho make churros? this is somebody who's never had any sort of normal social experience and sees how different he is and wishes it weren't the case, unlike Ritsu who assumes everyone else is like him, i think he'd like to have some more Experiences.

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"... ...Oh! Hello, {PC}—I didn't even notice you there. My mind was somewhere else."

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"Good morning! Sorry? My hair's messy? You're right, it's sticking right up at the front... That's embarrassing. I'll fix it right away."

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I usually have lunch in the dormitory. I do eat on the terrace with Lyca every now and then, but he seems so busy these days..."

Lyca is one of the members of Obscuary, btw! Seems like he and Subaru are friends.

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"I didn't take you for a night owl, {PC}. Since you're here, I suppose I'll stay up a little longer. You're sure you're okay? You're not sleepy?"

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Do you visit Sinostra very often, {PC}? I see... Oh, no reason. I was just making conversation. Ha ha."

why do you ask that. . .a certain mafioso captain wouldn't happen to be suspicious of you would he. . .or maybe you owe them money. . .or maybe you used to be part of Sinostra and moved to Hotarubi. . . .

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"It's getting late, {PC}. How about we finish this tomorrow? Thank you for keeping me company all this time."

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"Oh, I couldn't ask you to come all the way to my room to wake me up—I'd feel terrible. I do very much appreciate the thought, though."

it's okay buddy jin already makes them do it, one more pit stop won't hurt.

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Oh, hello, {PC}. Sorry, I was actually just on my way out. I should be back by evening—do you mind if we speak then?"

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Lyca has seen my message, so why hasn't he responded to it? I hope nothing bad has happened to him..."

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Lyca will adapt well to human society, I'm sure of it. I'm so relieved that Darkwick chose to trust him. I can't thank you enough for your help."

he really likes Lyca huh? that is his dog.

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"You can't sleep? Then let me tell you some stories. Legend has it that evil spirits appear once you've told a hundred. Now, what number was I up to..."

BOY IS TRYNA GET YOUR ASS HAUNTED.

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"I don't want to seem like I'm testing you, I just... I get really anxious sometimes... I'm sorry. I'm being weird, aren't I?"

he's the type to ask 'are you sure you love me? are you sure you wanna be with me?' after you get married and move in together and own a house and have two kids with another on the way. he's the hyper anxious 'i'm sorry we disagreed about our favorite colors do you hate me?' friend(affectionate) I wonder though, is he apologizing for seeming like he's testing you because he's using his stigma to see what you've been up to or something. . .? Probably not lol it's more likely he just keeps asking if you like him

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"There is no time like spring. Everyone seems more relaxed this time of year. It's reassuring to see."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"I have some sakura mochi. I was just about to prepare some tea to go with it—would you like to join me?"

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"They have no control over whether they bloom, and yet they get made a spectacle of nonetheless... Oh, sorry—I was talking about the cherry blossoms."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"There are many different flowers growing in Hotarubi, but I think the wisteria are my favorites. This is the best time to see them, so you should take a walk around."

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"Hot today, isn't it? It's always raining in Hotarubi, so it does provide a little escape from the blazing summer sun, but... Ha ha. It is very humid, isn't it?"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Summer makes me think of the ghost story Yotsuya Kaidan. The scene where Oiwa becomes hysterical, having realized her her face has been disfigured— incredible."

Yotsuya Kaidan is one of the best known japanese ghost stories! It's extremely violent, so read the summary at your discretion. The scene in question has Oiwa shown her reflection by her sister's boss to see that the cream she was given by a woman who was in love with her husband was actually some sort of poison that instantly scarred her face. She grabs a sword and goes to kill her, only for her to accidentally slit her own throat.

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Hotarubi House holds regular festivals during the summer months. If you need a yukata to wear, I'd be happy to pick one out for you."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I don't mind scary stories, but when that biwa in the tea room started playing by itself, it did make me jump a little..."

slight spoiler, although you can probably figure it out from this but. . .Zenji is a ghost. Subaru currently can't actually see him or hear his voice. . .only Haku, the pc, and, perhaps not so oddly, Towa can afair. All of his youtube content doesn't have him or his voice in it because he can't be recorded by cameras. So Subaru doesn't realize that the biwa playing on its own is actually Zenji playing the biwa.

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"The air has gotten crisper, and the leaves are changing color. I know it's only natural for the seasons to shift, so why does it make my heart ache so much?"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Oh, these? They're some chestnuts I found. I know—I should give them to Sho. I'm sure he'll be able to make something delicious with them."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"That's another kuchikiri tea ceremony under my belt. It's an annual tradition where one cuts open a tea jar to reveal the tea that was preserved from the first harvest."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"On long autumn nights when the moon is shining beautifully in the sky, it's hard to resist taking a walk outside. Don't stay out until too late though, {PC}."

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"...Oh, {PC}. Good morning... I had a hard time getting up today. It must be the cold... Ha ha. Not very captain-like, is it?"

Jin, Taiga, and Ed are all prone to not getting out of bed. and Yuri falls asleep on operating tables when he has down time. Trust me Subaru you are perfectly captain-like.

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Today, I'm going to order ingredients from one of my favorite stores so we can all make negima—tuna and scallion—hot pot together. Please, do join us."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"It's cold out today. I was just thinking about lighting the fire. Would you like to come and warm up with me?"

oh subaru you don't even know how that sounds

(between 8pm and 5am)

"People say winter makes you want to snuggle up with someone, but I find that a good blanket does a much better job."

i agree that blankets are much easier to manage than people lol. probably warmer too.

His birthday: (February 20th)

"A present? For me? Thank you... I didn't expect you to do anything for my birthday, so I'm a little caught off guard. I really appreciate it."

Your birthday:

"Um... Happy birthday.  I really hope this year will be a wonderful one for you."

New Years: (January 1st)

"Happy New Year. I hope I can depend on your guidance and support again this year."

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"Chocolate? Oh, It's Valentine's Day, isn't it? Does that mean these are for me...?"

nah i just wanted you to look at them. YES THEY ARE FOR YOU BBY. why would you be showing him chocolate if it wasn't for him! On any day, not just valentine's day!!

White Day: (March 14th)

"These are for you, {PC}. I put in a special order for monaka from my favorite confectioner in Ginza. They're wafers filled with bean jam—I hope you like them."

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"Earlier, Haku told me he was switching houses. It gave me a real shock— I'm very relieved that it wasn't true..."

i bet subaru made the most scared kicked puppy face and started apologizing for being such an awful captain and blamed himself for that haku would go to a different house and haku had to quickly explain it was just a prank for fear that subaru might burst into tears.

Halloween: (October 31st)

"Happy Halloween. I know it's nothing special, but I've prepared some treats for the occasion. Oh... But you're more than welcome to play a trick instead."

please don't trick him. april fool's day was hard enough for him.

Christmas: (December 25th)

"Merry Christmas. We already have our New Year decorations up in Hotarubi, so it has a real east-meets-west atmosphere now. I hope everyone is okay with it..."

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"Everyone seems busy at the moment. Maybe I should use this opportunity to tidy the garden..."

(13 affinity and above)

"{PC}? Oh... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you. I was just worried because you were so quiet..."

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"You're back... I'm so relieved. I was worried I'd done something to make you feel uncomfortable..."

this man shakes like a chihuahua 24/7. like you can taste the anxiety coming off of him. i love him. he's so pathetic(affectionate). i wanna squeeze his hand reassuringly and tell him everything's gonna be okay. i wanna hug him and pat his head. i wanna take him places so he learns more about the world outside of working. i wanna watch him do schoolwork excitedly because he's never really gone to school before and it's a new and exciting experience. i want him to experience the most mundane aspects of life with wonder.

good boy. yeah. get him anxiety meds /nodnod

[forbiddenmoss]

Part 2

2 hours.

What to do for 2 hours that doesn't lead to worrying about a possible pregnancy.

Feed the chickens. Ah yes the cute little chickens. There is Alice and Gertrude pecking away happily and there is Henrietta proudly showing off her first chicks. Such a good mama hen the motherly instinct came naturally.

Are these maternal instincts? Broodiness? Is this a sign I'm pregnant and I should just sell the farm and run back to the city get on my knees and beg joja for my old life back?

Breathing becomes a challenge like their lungs are being crushed by the possible responsibility. What if it's positive? What if I can't do it? Was the farm a mistake? What if it was all a mistake? With each thought their breathing gets shallower. Faster. Why is everything so bright? So loud? So much?

Their thoughts get interrupted by a leg nudge. Miso. He rubbed against their legs making little chirps for attention. And who are they to refuse miso head scratches? His fur was soft and quite warm from the morning sun. He had changed so much since Marnie first brought him to the farm. He was tiny so small so scared he just hid under the bed for the first couple days. But with time and patience and alot of fresh caught fish he changed he grew now he was like an old friend who slept on there bed and brought them dead birds. They came along way.

The chickens were all happily clucking away. The farm was coming together (thanks to robin) and while it was a slow start they were making a small profit.

It might not be easy but it's not impossible.

You've got this.

8:30 time to walk over to Harvey's. The day was irritating beautiful. Like the beginning of some romance and they were off to meet the love of there life. Well not today. Probably not tomorrow. Today's plan was to go to the doctors, find out if they are pregnant. If they are not off to the saloon to celebrate. If they are PANIC. But it would be negative they were completely over reacting... They had to be.

They were nearly knocked off their feet as they walked face first into Shane who barely responded.

"you better watch where you're going" was all he muttered before walking off like they didn't exist. But that was Shane. Marnie had say not to take it personally but it's hard not to. Leah and Elliot have their little creative group they aren't a part of, Sebastian, Abigail and Sam were nice but it felt out of politeness, Hailey is in a mood over something they done (what it was no one seems to sure), Emily is sweet but they rarely see each other, same with maru, penny doesn't really talk much which just leaves Harvey who they've rarely spoken to but is now the first person to find out they are pregnant. Or they are not pregnant.

Well the clock struck 9:00. The doctors is open.

Luckily the doctors was empty. Maru must not be working today. Harvey was quite chipper happily sorting through papers. When he noticed the farmer and smiled.

"oh hello hello I've been meaning to see you about a check up. I do it with my new patients I'll be a moment just setting u-"

"ithinkimpregnat" it came out quite fast and quite to the point but no point wasting time.

That caught Harvey off guard he stared at them in surprise before quickly composing himself. " O-k ..." Clears throat "ok we can find out for definite have you done an at home test?"

"n-no I'd need to order one from Pierre he doesn't stock medical things and joja mart has them but..." The reality started to sink in again.

"ah yes those tests aren't very reliable they are known for false negatives. If you pop in the back room we can find out the test doesn't take to long"

He gestures to the door leading the way. Through the door. Walk through the door. why is this so difficult need to find out. Today. But what if-

"hey" Harvey's voice snapped them out of it his facial expression soft, gentle he looked so understanding. "If this is to soon we can wait it doesn't have to be today. It's ok take a breath take your time"

Deep breath

"no. I need to know. I'm ready"

[lostlegendaerie]

Fuck it! US Private Student Loans Guide!

DISCLAIMER: while I have worked in private loans specifically for five+ years, this isn't ‘financial’ advice and is just a heavily summarized guide on how to navigate them. Yes, these loans suck, but complain to your legislators not me. I’m just trying to help you know what you’re doing. Additional info for each section is under the cut!

1) Who are you and who are all the companies constantly running around with my money?

I work in loan SERVICING, which is basically the billing department. If you’ve got a new company asking you for money, it's probably a new servicer and your debt is still owned by the bank. We enforce the terms in the promissory note, the document you sign telling the bank “yeah I'll play by your rules if you give me the money.” If your loan defaults, you’ll get contacted by a third (fourth?) party, but how that works is beyond my wheelhouse. The bank or your servicer should be able to confirm what happens in case of default.

2) What am I looking for in a ‘good’ loan?

Generally, you’re going to want SIMPLE instead of compound interest, a FIXED RATE opposed to a variable one, and you’ll want to go for FULL DEFERMENT while in school and make manual payments when you can. Also ask up front about stuff like if disability forgiveness or co-signer release (getting your parents off it) is offered.

3) This loan sucks! How do I make it better?

Student loans are NOTORIOUSLY hard to get out of, unfortunately. If the interest rate/payment relief options suck, you can try to REFINANCE where you take out a new loan to pay off the old one. This gives you a new promissory note, interest rate, and terms/conditions. If you’re trying to erase the debt entirely, ask for the promissory note (if they can't provide a copy, we have to forgive the debt. I've only seen this happen ONCE.) or try to go through social security disability.

DO NOT USE FREEDOM DEBT RELIEF OR OTHER SERVICES. DO NOT. THEY ARE SCAMS.

More in depth information for each point!

1) Lenders and Servicers

The lender is the person who provides the funds in the debt - the bank who pays the school or the hospital or the home contractor fixing your sink. The servicer is the company that is your point of contact when you need to make payments, ask for payment relief, or otherwise manage the loan that exists. Think of us as the mechanic (we keep the car running) where the bank is the manufacturer (they make the car). Some different servicers are SoFi, Zuntafi, Great Lakes, Nelnet and Firstmark Services; their names will be on the billing statements. Some different banks are Citizens, US Bank, NorthStar; their names will be on the promissory note and the disclosures.

Sometimes banks do sell the debt, however! A couple years ago Wells Fargo sold an enormous chunk of their loans off somewhere (an investment group, maybe?) but! The promissory note will still be the EXACT same if your debt gets sold. You’ll only get a new promissory note if you refinance the loan yourself.

2a) Interest Accrual and Rates

Interest is how banks profit off the loans they give out and/or ‘ensure they don't end up with a loss if the loan defaults’. (It's profit.) Most, but not all, loans calculate interest with the simple daily interest formula, shown below:

[(Current loan balance) x (interest rate)] divided by 365

If your loan’s balance is $10,000 and your interest rate is 6% you’ll be charged $1.64 each day. SIMPLE INTEREST means that this interest just kind of floats around on the account until a payment comes in and pays it off, where COMPOUND adds that interest to the balance at the end of the month/day/whatever. Compound charges you more over the life of the loan.

FIXED INTEREST is a set percent that doesn't change, where VARIABLE will change usually based on whatever the economy is doing. There’s a minimum and maximum value to the variable interest rates, so if you’re doing a variable ASK WHAT THE MINS AND MAXES ARE. A fixed rate might be 8% and a variable might be 3.25% the day you take it out, but that variable could have a maximum interest rate of 25% so be VERY, VERY CAREFUL. If you get stuck in a real bad variable interest rate, your best solution is probably a refinance.

2b) Deferment and Payment Allocation

So interest is gonna be accruing on your loan from the day the money leaves the bank. Sucks. And you may not be able to make payments while you're in school, so opting to DEFER your payments will stop them from billing you so you can skip a month or whatever without penalty. At the END of that deferment, though, whatever interest that accrued will be added to your current balance. If we use the example from above (10k loan with 1.64 daily interest) four years of school will add $2,400 to your balance and then your daily interest will jump up to $2.03 a day.

Solution? Make payments of what you can while you’re in school to chip away at that floating interest. Usually when you make a payment, it’s gonna go towards the interest first and then the rest drops the balance. (E.g. if you make a $20.00 payment ten days after your loan is disbursed, $16.40 will go towards interest and $3.60 towards your 10k balance). There is NO PENALTY for making extra payments or making early payments, but it might make your bills look a little weird if you’re being billed each month for just the interest.

3) Why are these loans so horrible? Can’t I find anything to help me?

Blame Reagan and the republicans who enabled him.

No, but really. The problem with these loans is that those promissory notes are VERY legally binding and have lots of fine print in there designed to make it as hard as possible for someone to skimp out on their debt without having their credit score decimated. Some lenders might even dip into your paychecks if you're crazy behind or default; again, that's not my wheelhouse and I've only maybe seen that once. Your best bet is just to pay it off as fast as possible (again, no penalty for paying the loan off early) or refinance into better terms.

And I get it. I really do. I hate how we’ve made so many incredibly important things in our society locked behind a paywall that charges poor people more to climb than the rich. But if you’ve made it this far, please don't turn your anger at me for not giving you the answers you want. The best I can do is vote for people who are willing to crack down on predatory lending, keep fighting for student loan forgiveness… and at my own job, make sure that my coworkers aren't making mistakes.

If you have a more specific question, I can try to answer as best I can without breaking any information privacy laws. And take care, okay? You are never fighting alone.

[mellybouboulove]

My guardian angel🤍𓆩♡𓆪☁️

Chapter 9

Plot summary: Drug Dealer Ellie Williams X OFC slowburn fic, out of universe and takes place in college, set in the 2000s. Smut content to come.

previous: Chapter 8 next: soon

a.n : sorry for the absence guys I've been struggling with my mom's trial for robbery while also dealing with my final exam weeks it's been a tough time :/ I hope i'll be able to be more active from now on <33 thanks for the support the first chapter has been blowing up don't hesitate to share it if you enjoy it and submit your suggestions :)

Tags: #wlw #sapphic #drugdealer!ellie #modern!ellie #tlou #slowburn #smut #fluff #tlouau #au #modernau #drugs

CHAPTER 9

It was a lonely Monday at Ellie's appartement; I was getting bored and lazy about everything. I decided to turn the tv on when this report on the devastating effects of drugs in working-class neighbourhoods started playing, all those lives ruined and lost because of what my girlfriend had to sell to make a living.

It didn't make me feel anything to see these consequences, all I could think of at this exact moment was the long list of reasons why users are ready to pay so much, firstly for their emotional fragility and then for all the recreational effects I needed so badly.

 The last couple weeks, her flat became like an open house, several times a day her colleagues would come hide the bags and take them away. Ellie acted as if everything was normal and usual, she thought I was too stupid to realize what was going on around me. I gradually came to understand what I was up against when I went out with a drug dealer, the secrecy, the lies, always waiting for a message from her 'work' or some bad news related to it. I never tried to talk to her about it in anticipation of our first conflict, our first real problem as a couple, I wanted our relationship to remain purely perfect for as long as possible.

 Earlier in the day Ellie was unreachable, on my way to her house I saw 3 police cars leaving her building, worried sick and still without any news I spent about 2 hours waiting for her on her doorstep. When she arrived, she only told me she didn't have time to talk and took 3 bags full of drugs, probably to hide them somewhere else. I was still waiting for her to come back home. 

The report continued to run in the background, with a journalist depicting the virtues of cocaine. If I'm going to be forced into the world of drugs, I might as well not fall victim to it entirely and enjoy it, after all I deserve it. For the first time I allowed myself to go through Ellie's things looking for drugs, in fact me going through her things was the first problem of this situation but as long as she didn't find out I could pretend it didn't happen. It was the only thing left for me to do, I was getting crazy in this apartment. It would be stupid not to take the opportunity seeing everyone leaving huge bags full of what I was craving.

I knew that drugs were everywhere in her place, she'd left the bags at her colleagues’  but I know that she has to keep some on her in case of an urgent need from a client. Sometimes she was keeping it hidden in her alarm clock, sometimes it was in her guitar or any kind of personal matter that she hoped no-one would think of. At first I headed for her office, nothing to report. In her pillow were small transparent bags of heart-shaped pills whose dosage I didn't know so I decided not to take the risk. After spending the afternoon looking into her belongings, I was pleasantly surprised to see that Ellie wasn't hiding anything from me, no trace of other girls or anything I wasn't already aware of. I ended up finding powder behind a piece of furniture. I didn't know what it was either but I was so desperate and tired from my little investigation that I decided to take some of it.

I felt something very strong take hold of me, I had never felt such effects before, a wave of energy overwhelmed me and I could not stand still. The guilt of having relapsed, of having gone through Ellie's things, of not being able to recover a normal life since that stupid accident, my anger at Ellie’s job for polluting my life and our relationship, all these thoughts swirled around in my head and increased tenfold. 

Finally she came in:

- Ellie wtf where were you ?? I was worried sick, I stayed there all day waiting for you can’t you answer your goddamn phone for once?? I left you hundreds of text messages. Are you serious? - Relax babe I got us chinese food and a good movie for tonight. Let’s chill a little. I'm so tired. 

I was shocked by her behavior, pretending like it was a normal day while I spent it alone getting crazy in between these four walls. I felt the anger boiling in my veins, it was just a matter of time until I exploded. I stood still, watching in disbelief trying to contain myself. At least I thought that’s what I was doing but my body was all tensed up, I was shaking, clenching my fists really hard and digging my nails as deep as I could in the palms of hands; I felt my body heat rise up in a second, my cheeks were burning. 

Ellie was in her room to change into more comfortable clothes, I heard her movements, she was making a lot of noise, moving her stuff around as if she was looking for something, just the same noises I made all day while looking for her drug. 

I still couldn’t move except for shaking and digging my nails deeper when I heard firm loud footsteps coming near me. 

- Maya wtf did you do ?? Are you fucking serious ? Looking into my stuff really?? For what huh? Were you looking for drugs maybe? I can’t believe you, you're so pathetic, I trusted you, I’m out of the house just one day and you go around all my personal belongings without any shame, not even tryna hide it leaving all the mess ?? 

As she was arguing with me I felt a wave of adrenaline hit me and started screaming at her face, my body finally allowing me to move again but without me being in control of anything. 

- I fucking hate you you’re a worthless bitch you’re never here your stupid job is ruining everything I hate you leaving me dying in this fuck ass apartment of yours while you’re out there doing god knows what you’re leaving drugs everywhere in house of course i’m gonna take it im sure you left it here on purpose, tempting me for me to take it so I can just die because you don’t give a fuck you just wanna get rid of me. Didn’t think I would manage to get sober in the first place huh?? But that was the deal if I was sober we could date now you’re stuck with me you needed to get rid of me that’s what you wanted. 

As I was talking, without even realizing it I started pushing furniture to the ground and throwing anything I could catch at her face. She was just standing there doing nothing which only infuriated me more. 

- CAN’T YOU SAY ANYTHING??! CAN’T YOU FUCKING REACT FOR ONCE?? You’re such a useless stupid whore you’re lucky you have me, no one wants you you’d be all alone if this wasn’t for me.

Without saying anything, she went back to her room and I could hear the same sounds of her looking through her stuff again. I then saw her coming back with her backpack. She took a box in a shelf and got a bunch of drugs out of it and dug it into her pocket. She zipped her jacket up and looked at me. 

- Eat the food while it’s hot, there’s no drugs in the house anymore so don’t waste your time making a mess in the remaining rooms. I’m not talking to you when you’re like that. 

Before I even had the time to process her words, I heard the door closing behind her and the sound of her car’s motor driving away as I stood still in the same place. I stayed alone in her apartment crying wondering if everything that had just happened was real.

[spectrechosts]

Engine Maintenance

What if spaceships were powered by fucking machines? This is a viable technology probably.

Kim drags her torrented romances onto her second monitor, and clicks on the angry red call notification buzzing at her.

"Cap'n." She says, still side-eyeing her show.

"We aren't going fast enough." Says the Captain, leaving her to infer her request.

Kim sighs and alt-tabs to the readouts she's actually supposed to be keeping an eye on.

"She's outputting at 7.3, I don't know how much faster you want." She says, tabbing away just as quickly.

"She's pushed 8 before."

"Not without crashing. You want us dead in the water for a .7 increase?"

"Replacement's already out of bed, and I know how logarithmic scales work. Wring what you can out of her and next shift will come in for the swap. Go." The Captain says, and hangs up on her.

Kim sighs and pauses her show, shunting it off to the terminal in her room before inspecting the engine readouts again. The machine says that it can push output up to 7.6 points by overloading the core, but-

Sexual energy reactors are finicky at the best of times. Even after billions of credits poured into R&D to make some of the most efficient fucking machines known to man, even after the years of training cores go through, there are a lot of variables.

Kim cleans herself up in the mirror. Fusses her hair into sexy unkempt mechanic as opposed to regular unkempt mechanic. Undoes her jumpsuit's zipper enough to show off the goods in a low cut tank top.

The reactors are finely tuned to the cores, monitoring suites doing thousands of checks a second to adjust to their needs. They're ruthlessly efficient, kept at maximum settings; They shut off, if the core can't take anymore, but if you don't surpass what it says their maximum is they'll keep the core right below that limit for their entire eight hour shift. They can even weigh the boost from letting them orgasm against how much it'll need to slow down afterwards to prevent a shutdown.

And then of course there's the overload sequence. Punch in the override and it'll just squeeze all the power it can out of the core, massive computer banks dedicating all their power to calculating the most efficient way to make them cum their brains out, ability to continue going afterwards be damned.

She lazily types in the code, confirms it, and sets it on a slight delay.

There are limits, though. The profound depravity of ships that run on sex power meant that the tech faced a lot of pushback. One result of which is that they can't legally be rigged up with direct brain links. The documentation still insists that they're the absolute best thing for harvesting sexual energy (you know, until they want to sell you the next model), but there's anecdotal, completely unfounded evidence that when working with a core that didn't sign up because they're hot for the unyielding perfection of cold, sleek metal, silly things like a real human connection can bump output by a good 0.5 points.

She keys in the door code, and enters the reactor chamber.

"Warning. External stimuli can interfere with reactor output." Warns an artificial voice, that Kim silences via the built-in terminal. She punches in a few more commands, and the sensory helmet attached to Riley hisses and detaches.

"Whuh?" She mumbles, disoriented.

"Hey babygirl." Kim says, as the overload sequence starts. "Are you ready to be good for me?"

Riley's eyes go wide as the machine changes gears; blunt silicone-capped vibrator wands, electrodes, grasping robotic arms- all ramping up to an irresistible intensity.

"WAit, wait I can't, I'll crash, I'll craaaA-" She whines, bucking against her restraints into the thrumming wand.

"Good." Kim says, in the dismissive, clinical way she knows will drive her wild. "I'm going to wring you out for everything you're worth, babygirl."

Riley lets out a loud, sharp moan, her legs shaking. The machine is very very good at what it does. She's already ticked over to 7.4, there's only a few short moments for Kim to weave her way into the tangle of wires and arms, to grip her cheeks and kiss her neck and growl "Don't cum until I give you permission."

Yellow warning notifications for unexpected behavior begin popping up on the various monitors decorating the engine room, because the reactor didn't tell her not to cum so why isn't she, try harder I guess. Riley squeals, her voice rising in pitch as it becomes harder and harder for her to try and fight her impending climax, until Kim shoves her fingers into her mouth to silence her.

"Do you want the whole crew to hear what a slut you are?" She asks, and she feels the ship lurch forward as Riley's control slips and she's brought to her messy, violent peak.

Out of the corner of her eye, Kim sees power output hitting 8.2 points.

How's that for fast enough?

It stays there for a good few seconds, until the overstimulation is too much and output plummets; all the monitors flash red warnings and the machinery winds down and disengages, releasing a shaking Riley into her arms.

"S-Sorry Mistress, I'm sorry-" She babbles as Kim strokes her hair.

"No, you did so good! My good girl."

"I disobeyed. I-I didn't have permission."

"It's okay, it was a lot." Kim murmurs. "You liked the thing about everyone hearing what a slut you are?"

Riley shivers.

"So much, holy shit."

"I'll keep that in mind."

Riley takes a few panting breaths nuzzled into Kim's chest before peeking at the readout screens.

"Eight-point-two???" She asks, stunned. "What the fuck are we trying to do?"

"Cap'n got notified her new model kit came in, wants to pick it up ASAP."

"Fuck me."

"Mhm." Kim agrees. "Be glad you're not on second shift, we're a ways out yet."

"God. Carry me out of here before she tries to put me back in."

[artastic-friend]

Eyyy

The stickers will be cheaper and more abundant.

I could only afford to make 10 keychains that I can sell. besides the ones for myself and friends-

So they will probably be a little more expensive both because they cost more to make and because I won't have that many.

The stickers will probably be $3-5 for one? + shipping prices

The keychain I am not sure yet, maybe $8-10 for one + shipping. I'll have to see how things go tho.

I need to set up my Etsy and figure out how to run it and stuff- I've never done this before lmao- but seeing people are super excited I feel like I have to give back to the community and set this up so ppl can have their bbg in their hands ^^

I am not sure when I'll have these all set up- but I will update you all when they keychains are ready and after that it should hopefully not be too long before I can start putting them up on Etsy👍

[polin-erospsyche]

Alright! Let’s talk about those rumours for part 2. First I'll preface by saying these are rumours, nothing has been confirmed, so let's all breathe before we jump to conclusions.

So rumours come from an article are circulating and people have been speculating that he will go back to the brothels or that he will (in whatever way) look at someone else. So here is my TED talk as to why this would be worst writing decision they could ever make and thus will probably not happen unless they want to intentionally shoot themselves in the foot.

So from what I know from spoilers and such, part 2 mirror part 1, just things are more ramped up and the stakes are higher. So far they seem to have the same beats at the same place. Episode 5 sets things out, episode 6 is fun and games until it all comes to a grinding halt when Colin learns of Pen’s identity so episode 7 is dealing with the fallout of that and episode 8 is the resolution. Seems to me like the Lady Whistledown reveal beat is paralleling their first kiss beat. Episode 3 now for me was the most chaotic, because what do you mean they kiss each other like that and it takes them two whole episodes to get their shit together? Ah yes, it’s all the awkwardness and lack of clear communication. Now if in ep7, he thinks of being unfaithful at any point it would mirror him going back to the brothel in ep 3 and honestly I would personally feel like it is lazy writing (not that the writing is stellar by any stretch of the imagination to start with).

So let's get into ALL the reasons why Colin cheating on Pen in ANY way is like the worst writing decision (tbh I can't even believe I wrote out that sentence).

This is a romance show, catered I'm guessing to a large female audience and in which they sell us the male lead as the epitome of "down bad crying at the gym" as soon as they realise they have feelings for their counterpart. Colin, from what I understand, represents this more than any of them. So not only would that decision be so incredibly out of character, it would also essentially ruin the Bridgerton experience and what we're paying for. There is literally no realities out there where cheating would ever be perceived as sexy or attractive. It would be drama for the sake of drama and it would be badly handled drama because they'd only have 1 episode to save the thing and make us believe in their love story again.

It would kill their male lead. And that is just laughable. A romance show building up their romantic leads, having to deal with backlash, having to deal with an audience which they know is already, even before the season started, angry at Colin, only to kill him in the second to last episode. I'm sorry but this is just plain stupid and it's not selling me a romance show, maybe a drama show at best. I was the first one jumping at defending Colin when the first rumours of brothels came out before part 1, defending intimacy and the difference between those and his scenes with Pen. I was in fact correct. But this? In part 2? When a lot of people are still dissing on Colin? It's character and season suicide. No one, not the fans nor the general audience would ever forgive him.

It would be against everything they have sold us so far. They’ve been selling us something incredibly romantic and swoon worthy. This choice would be the complete opposite of those things. It would make no sense whatsoever. So unless they find it incredibly amusing to sell us something and giving us the opposite of what they have tried so hard and spent so much money on building up, it's not happening.

Now I think it’ll be incredibly angsty and with good reasons. He has every right to feel betrayed and cheated. The women he trusted and got vulnerable with and was honest with 1) hurt him badly, 2) didn’t dare show the same level of honesty. And that’s why it just doesn’t sit well with me that we get a reveal at the end of ep 6. We’re running out of time to deal with a lot of things and it will not help the choppy or rushed feeling of this season. And do I trust them to give us a scene where they have clear, honest, open communication? Not really no, because for some reason show runners think that a scene without drama is a boring scene. Although that conversation is really what is needed. So I know we’ll get an angry and incredibly hurt Colin. I’m hoping we’ll get arguments. Hell even a moment of doubt where the engagement is put on the line, because yes it would make sense for them to go « Do we keep going? Is it worth it? Are we going to work? ». The distance will add to the angst. And for something much bigger than them (the queen, the crown) to push them back together. And for Colin to decide that he will see this from her perspective and even if he doesn’t agree with it, she’s still Pen, and his Pen and she tried the best she could given the circumstances and that her actions, no matter what they might have been, still came from a place of love.

I’m ready to accept a lot from this season but cheating or god forbid someone spoke of rough sex is out of the question. It’s not them and it’s not what they’re selling us and it would be character and season suicide.

[phayz]

pleeease keep talking about toys...i think this is interesting and smth i've never thought too hard about but it makes sense and i like to hear your opinions on modern toys

(ask pertaining to this post)

holy shit okay !! i would love to ramble on so, i shall!

okay im no expert on toy sales history, this is all just observation from my life experiences and i'll try to keep each part i want to go over relatively short!

that being said lets start with a small one that i've personally noticed as a canadian: Kinder egg toys! i remember when they used to come with like 4-8+ pieces, and you needed the included step by step manual to assemble them. they would often come with sticker sheets to decorate them with, and they would often be articulated or be set on wheels or have some sort of fun or movement or general functionality to them:

dont those look awesome? wrapped in 2 kinds of chocolate, and for only like 2$! i remember they would come in all shapes and sizes, all sorts of animals and vehicles and sometimes freaky little abominations, as you can see above, and sometimes even puzzles! they were such a special treat as a kid.

but kinder eggs now? come with a maximum of like 3 pieces that just snap together (usually the front and back of the toy, and then the platform they stand on). and thats all they mostly are now, stiff toys that stand on platforms wahhooooo yippeee

idk just look at the quality difference from the old ones above compared to some of the new ones:

like..... these are..... nothing! literally nothing. just a figure snapped to a pole/platform and thats it! not very interesting for more than 3 minutes max.

now i know what you're thinking: "not ALL of the old kinder toys had to have been bangers" and you'd be right, some were lame as hell, but even the lame ones from before look more intricate than the ones we have now, like can you see what i mean, just detail-wise?

it just feels so cheap and shitty, i could go on and on but more is explained later. point is, it sucks.

anyway that's a very small example and we can move onto bigger and better ones, and maybe even one that everyone else might have noticed by now; McDonald's toys! remember when they were actually toys?

and not just stiff figurines?

(the minions franchise was like CRACK for companies who love making profit off of nothing but stiff rounded plastic. probably the cheapest form of "toy" i can think of)

and yeah, again, its not like there werent figurines back in the day too, there's ALWAYS been lame as hell mcdonalds toys, but looking among many modern mcdonalds toys, you dont see anything as cool as the old ones. literally every major modern movie/franchise right now is nothing but figurines. the most recent actually interactive mcd's toy ive seen is when they collabed with hasbro games

again, companies just seem to be pumping out quantities over quality.

but why?

well, for starters toys are becoming cheaper (both in price and quality) because prices have sky rocketed and stores are forced to only stock cheaper things, therefore the cheap things sell the most, and then more of them get made, and statistics get fucked, etc etc the cycle repeats.

but toy companies know one thing, and that's that things that are "cuter" always sell more. "cuter" being used with vitriol because their idea of 'cute' is 'more glitter and sparkles and rainbow colours and obnoxiousness' oh, and dont forget the huge soulless bug eyes on all of them!

i know that people love these things, but theyre so..... uncanny. their stare is piercing, their stance is so stiff, i always felt bad actually playing with the only one of these i had growing up, and not just because it freaked me out, it just genuinely didnt feel good to play with.

and i knoowwwww people are obsessed with these things, but come on, you have to admit theyre SO unoriginal! theyre just cookie cutter shapes!

these things are horrifying and, at best, belong on a shelf.

these "beany boos" are so woobified and almost feel like a flanderized version of a stuffed animal, and they've completely taken over "beanie babies", which were wonderful soft little things that actually had movement and weren't stiff to cuddle! I also feel like they're almost trying to copy what webkinz was, in a way, as some of those were stiff too (but still loveable and not burdened with an uncanny, vacant stare)

anyway this is getting insanely long and im sorry but i feel like im going insane every time i see new toys nowadays. the like.... "cuteification" of everything is driving me insane, and the fact that they are simply just lower quality than what we used to get, because of prices rising and causing easy-to-make things to become more and more popular.

examples to further prove these points:

extreme woobifying or "cuteification" by almost completely removing all horse anatomy in favour of thin limbs, heavy makeup eyes that are now on the front of her face, and modern influencer eyebrows. on a horse.

and the extreme-simplifying of toys can be seen quite well on those mini polly pocket sets!! see this one here?

almost allllll of those little plastic things could be rotated or rearranged or moved or fucked with in some manner, it was awesome. i loved these miniature houses they always came with so much shit. wanna guess what the newer ones look like?

you guessed it, like shit!!

man even beyblades used to come with like, all sorts of different pieces both metal and plastic alike, and you had to assemble them yourself and you could interchange pieces to obtain a different weight which would affect your attacks against other beyblades, etc etc:

and looking at them now? they seem to be mostly made of- yep, you guessed it, hard cheap plastic.

anyway holy shit i literally reached the 30 image limit on a single post tumblr really said thats ENOUGH !! i cant believe i just spent that long talking about the worlds most pointless thing but at any rate i hope you enjoyed it and i hope you see my vision. because like i said im not insanely knowledgeable on any of this in particular, but its hard not to notice the decline in quality of all of todays modern toys.

[featureenvyproductions]

my thoughts on how to do Basically Kinda cel animation but cheap as fuck PART 2

If you haven't seen part 1 of this you can find it here:

INTRO

Ok so where were we. We had gotten through penciling last time. This part won't be super ultra mega as involved because we won't be like. You know. Building a shitty light box.

We will however be doing 🎉ink and paint🎉

I probably made you buy some of the things you need in the previous part of the tutorial but let's go over all the ingredients you need for this part. Once again the whole point of these is not to have you make the most super duper high quality thing to ever exist that will make god herself cry at the marvel wrought by your skilled hand the point is to Traditional Animate TM if you're fucking broke as shit and get your shit out there no matter what because you're stubborn and you can do this and no one is gonna keep you down. Like in part 1, I bought EVERY SINGLE ITEM in this list at the dollar store, ensuring pretty much maximum affordability (you likely will not have to go back for extras later so these will mostly be one time purchases unless you're trying to animate a bazillion fucking frames). You may even have most of this laying around your house.

You will need

-sharpie (don't worry! They have eliminated the horrible smell from when we were young! There's still a bit of smell but it's not as bad or as dangerous especially if you leave the windows open) get at least black or a dark color but you can get additional colors if you like

-clear page protectors (these come in packs of 16 and you will need 4 for every dollar store drawing pad's worth of frames if you're intending to use the whole pad. Otherwise just get as many as you need. If you need more than 8-10 packs however it becomes more cost effective to go to a big box store and buy a pack with several hundred protectors)

-gloves. You'll want to wear these while inking and painting because it'll reduce the chance you'll get a bunch of finger prints on the clear sheets, or paint on your hands. The dollar store sells nitrile gloves so I'll use those here, but typically I actually buy white cotton gloves in bulk for this.

-acrylic paint (I recommend getting at least 2-4 colors - like 2 contrasting colors and white+black. you can do a lot with a light color + darker version of the contrasting color or a dark color + white though. And you can just have ONE color only if thats what you want. It's just important to remember that you will NOT be able to dilute the paint with water if that's what you're used to doing. You also cant go wrong with just primary colors + white but my store was out of blue and yellow so :/)

-craft adhesive, specifically the dollar store kind or something like it. I'll elaborate on why later but it's really important. If you don't have a dollar tree in your area, I think the closest thing would be tacky glue? I honestly straight up do not know though. You need something paintable but ultimately MORE STICKY/TACKY than it is wet. If that makes sense

-something to mix paint on (for the sake of only getting things from the dollar store I got paper plates)....I didn't take a picture of this but I feel like you know what a paper plate is probably. You're on the depression meals enthusiast website after all

-something to put water in to mix your brush (or just use the sink I guess)

-something to dry your brush (like paper towels. I am so so serious you will need a dry ass brush)

-brushes. One of those sets with some pointy ones and some less pointy ones will work. We're not going for perfection here. Just don't get something so chonky you can't do little corners and don't get something so small painting a larger area will press your rage buttons

Ok. Onto the process.

A Note on Backgrounds

I forgot if I explicitly mentioned backgrounds in the last tutorial but if all you did was draw stationary settings on the "animation paper" for back drops then all you will need to do is go over the lines with a sharpie or even just darken them and shade with your pencil. You do not need to transfer stationary backgrounds to a cel using the process in the following section unless you really want to (it does make painting easier, but I didn't paint most of my backgrounds for my animation aside from the occasional detail. If you aren't painting detail inside outlines or animating something like say water or snow, transferring to a cel is really unnecessary). Kind of like the background below (of course, you'll note that this is a piece of paper taped to a page protector. I don't know why I didn't take a picture of literally anything else. Same idea though you just won't have to tape it to a page protector to align the image if you already drew your background on the punched paper)

Ok now onto the stuff that DOES move.

Inking

Ok! So let's in the frames you penciled when following the last tutorial. For this part, you will want your sharpie(s) and page protectors. And gloves wear the gloves.

The way this works.....In traditional animation, you would typically trace over the pencil drawings you made on the animation paper, but trace onto clear sheets that can be composited later to make one who frame of the scene. Like photoshop layers but manual.

Essentially we're going to use the page protectors as our cels and ink onto those. Typically you would use acetate cels, but the fact that no one is using them these days means there aren't a lot being made and it means that you will be shipping them from a billion miles away and they're going to cost you like 75 cents - a dollar PER CEL. Not PER FRAME. If you are animating multiple things, you're likely going to be using multiple cels per frame and it adds up so fucking fast. You also would ink onto those with something like India ink or thinned cel paint. Which are also of course expensive (these days of course people mostly do digital inking and scan their pencil drawings and trace over them onto a new layer in something like photoshop but since the focus of this info dump is the broke people equivalent of traditional animation we won't be doing that here - though you're free to like chuck this tutorial into the sun and do it anyway idc I'm not your dad).

Instead we're going to trace pencil drawings onto page protectors with a sharpie.

It's really simple.

-Take the first pencil sketch in your sequence and stick it on your peg bar (we did all this in part 1 - pencils and making the peg bar).

-Put a page protector on the peg bar as well, right on top of the pencil sketch. Mine had a bumpy side. I put the bumpy side down and inked on the smooth side. If the cel feels like it's sliding you can hold the top in place by putting a bit of tape along the top edge

-Trace the pencil lines you want to keep with the sharpie. If you got a dark one i recommend using that for most of the lines bc it'll show up better but it can look cool to combine colors as long as they're kind of dark ish (important bc this will not be as dark as traditional ink) but it's your call. Also make sure to indicate the frame number somewhere inconspicuous like the very bottom next to the peg holes. Probably a good time to mention that you absolutely need to use the same type of page protector you used to line up the peg bar holes in part 1, though if you want to re-punch holes in your page protectors and use a different brand I guess I'm not going to stop you. I also won't stop you for trying other ink, but I am going to tell you that in my lengthy journey to find something that would stay on these and not smudge, sharpie was the ONLY think that could do it (well and alcohol markers like Copics, but they are way too expensive for this tutorial and don't show up as well).

-Repeat for the next pencil in the sequence etc

When you're done with those let's move onto paint! Dry time for sharpies is pretty short.

Painting!!

Ok this part was a bit of a challenge for me to figure out because NOTHING wants to stick to these little shits. What I didn't pay in money I paid in rage I guess. But I did figure it out.

Here's what I came up with. For this part you'll need all the other supplies in the ingredients list (and no I don't plan to stop calling it that I have a really boring sense of humor and it's still funny to me after 5 times and you count your lucky blessings I haven't amused myself further by switching to Ingredience).

-once the sharpie is dry on one of your inked cels, put the cel face down and make sure it's held in place with the peg bar (you won't be tracing anything in this step obviously but it'll help keep things steady). By face down I mean the inked side should be up against your drawing surface - you'll be painting on the back of the cel (so like if you drew on the smooth side then paint on the bumpy side) (I DONT KNOW WHY I DIDNT TAKE A PICTURE OF THIS STEP. I HOPE IT MAKES SENSE)

-Mix up your first color but HOLD OFF ON PAINTING TILL YOU READ THE NEXT STEP (Also note that what you start with matters - Paint from smallest most detailed area to biggest area, allowing dry time between step along the way. Basically figure out any detail areas and paint those first)

-Add glue to the paint on your pallette. I had a world of a time figuring out how to do the paint for this because NOTHING wants to stick to page protectors. I experimented with several types of glue mix ins to see if I could get it to adhere. After trying to mix the acrylic paint with (individually) Elmer's glue equivalent, modgepodge, and a watery more instant craft adhesive, I realized none of those would work. The paint just continued to bead up on the "cel". The dollar tree liquid craft adhesive did however cause the acrylic paint to stick. I experimented with the ratio and found that typically adding glue in the amount of 25-50% of the paint volume was sufficient to get the paint to stop beading, while still not diluting it so much as to cause it to dry clear or translucent.

In the first picture below, paint + that glue on the left was by far the most successful.

-ok! Go ahead and paint! - like I said before, start with details, let them dry, then do larger areas on top. Let everything dry. You may need two coats for larger areas but yeah wait for jt to dry before deciding. (Oh yeah I fucked up one of my pegs so I wasn't putting the thing on the peg bar here, mostly also bc I had nothing to trace anyway. I did also lose my tape so I'm holding it in place with a piece of kneadable eraser. You don't have to do this you can use tape just dont get it on the part of the image you intend to have in the shot (and chances are you WILL crop some of the final image in post anyway))

Once you've done all this and all your frames are dry it's time to put it all together! And that will be the topic of part 3, which will come soon! (I will show how I did it for Fate For A King, but I also realize people may not have access to all the same things, so I'm doing a bit of experimentation to find other methods of eventually ending up with a thing you can upload to tumblr ultimately)

If you click the following link and it takes you to a complete post then yay! That means I came back and wrote it at some point. If you go there and it's still a placeholder post though don't worry! I will get to it, I just want a working link here in case anyone reblogs this in the future so they won't have to go piece together the whole trail of posts.

Part 3 link!

[andmaybegayer]

Last Monday of the Week 2024-07-22

There are many upsides to the city in the summer. But there's also the horrors.

Listening: I am (I think) almost but not quite done with Paradise Killer, a first-person detective game set on the extradimensional luxury island headquarters of an eldritch cult with a truly incredible soundtrack. A mix of city pop and vaporwave that really goes hard if you love the sound of the perfect imagined city. Here's "Knife and Crystal"

The entire Paradise Killer soundtrack is great, and in game each song has a little snippet of text to go with it, this one's is

The heat helps cook mysteries. People get weird in the heat. They get dangerous. Dangerous people create mysteries.

I'll write this up probably separately and it'll go in next week's monday, since I haven't called the trial yet and still have some snooping to do, but it really is a fantastic game. Try it, if you have the time, I got most of the way through it in about 8 hours.

This music sounds like a perfect summer day in the city we all wish we could be in, where there are exactly as many people around as you want, and you always stumble into what you need.

As a note, I think it is an interesting comparison to the Marielda soundtrack, which feels to me like a very different kind of summer city, a languorous city on the edge, an, overwhelmingly hot city, with only a few afternoon thunderstorms and passing clouds to break an almost oppressive heat. So you know, where I am now. I'll link the title song here too:

I mean the podcast helps sell it, but this would also fit into uh. The spanish civil war? Clarinet is like that sometimes.

God damn I have opinions on city-esque music huh.

Reading: Had a bit of a slump coming off of The Traitor Baru Cormorant but I finally picked up Monster and was immediately blindsided by the perspective change. Very interesting. The letter Baru receives from one of the other cryptarchs is making me go insane.

Watching: Movie night this week was RRR, which I have seen a couple times already but did get the joy of watching with some friends who had not seen it at all. There is so much going on, it turns out if you run out of making one movie you can just pivot to making another movie with the same guys and if you do that for long enough you have a three hour feature film.

RRR has lots of subtlety that can be debated but it is also so much fun to watch. It is up front and largely unironic in a way that is very refreshing because it is also done well. There are a lot of bad movies that are unironic and unfortunately that mostly hurts them because they can't deliver on their earnestness.

The thing that really stands out is that it knows how to hold a shot well. So many scenes in the movie just go on forever, whether that's the extended BFF montage or the torture scenes or the slow motion action, it just holds a shot in a way that feels obnoxious at times.

It helps that they're both impossibly hot.

Playing: I picked up a couple VR games in the steam sale to try and expands my horizons. One of those is The Utility Room, a fairly old VR experience based on a VR museum that's even older. Its age shows, it lacks a lot of the creature comforts of more modern games, but it is clever. It uses VR to put you in huge spaces in proximity to enormous objects that move way faster than anything like that does regularly for most people. It's a fun little experiment.

Also got Half Life: Alyx which I am really enjoying, I just got to the part where you get the flashlight which I assume means I'm about to get sosososo scared. VR so dramatically changes the way you think about interaction especially in games. Most obviously, this is a shooter, but in a normal shooter you shoot things by putting them in the middle of the screen and pressing "shoot" and then some HP is deducted. Here I am reminded that even when I handle real pistols I have a bad habit of raising the barrel a few degrees too high and I have to compensate for that. You have to fumble with magazines and rack the slide in the heat of panicked combat where you feel very much like a headcrab is about to tear your face off. It's great.

You also get the sheer physicality of the environment. Valve did not skimp on this game, it's not a little demo or a toy, it's a whole-ass game, and they made sure that almost anything reasonable you can think to do works. You just reach out, you can move barrels by grabbing the rim and rolling them, you can open boxes, you can smash crates. You have a really smart gravity grabber system that makes interacting with the environment less arduous, and some very intelligent use of the fact that you have to switch what's in your hand to make you feel endangered any time you have to put your pistol away to hack a circuit or move an object.

Making: Disastrous burfee making misadventure when a friend said she had been wanting to make burfee and I invited her over. Got mixed up while trying to host and cook simultaneously and didn't boil the syrup long enough, resulting in liquid burfee that did not ever set up into something usable. Salvaged haphazardly with some dessicated coconut to form a structural mesh, but it was not good. Syrup is the most important and least fixable part of a burfee recipe, you really just have to learn to eyeball it to make sure it's right before you continue. Learn from my mistake. Make sure your bubbles are stacking to know you've driven off enough water.

Tools and Equipment: Thin, fine cotton sheets are a great way to avoid messing up pillows if you aren't able to wash your hair as regularly as you'd like, or if you just don't like generic grease build-up. You can keep so many of them on hand and toss them in for washing every couple days.

I didn't have hot water this week because of the annual maintenance cycle, so. You know.

[socialjust-ish]

yo, I see you’re making an effort to do more original posts. Any opinions on YGO, either the story or the game?

Assuming YGO is short for Yu-Gi-Oh , because I am not up to date on the day's acronyms:

Out of all the early 2000's anime-adaptations-created-to-sell-something-to-children genre I think the game of Yu-Gi-Oh did the best at making you feel like it was "real."

Obviously not the giant holographic monsters, but the "heart of the cards" specifically.

When I was a kid (probably 8 years old) this was the hot card game on the playground. But most of us didn't know how to actually play the game. The TV show had a modified rule set and we played by those rules (i.e., much lower life points, I think how summons and sacrifices worked were slightly different, etc.). The most important rule change was that we did not have size limits to our decks. Kids would basically just carry around their entire collection and draw from it. But, we were also 8 years old, so the decks were basically just every booster pack mushed into a pile - there was no strategy aside from "draw your strongest card first".

But because it was a card game with a lot of randomness, and that was made all the more extreme by the giant decks kids played with, there were very rare moments that felt like we had tapped into the Heart of the Cards.

I'll give you an example: I was playing a round with my best friend at the time. He was consistently better than me at the game and I don't think I'd ever won against him. We're both low on life points, he has a monster with something like ~2,500 points. I have one with something like ~2,000 points. It's my turn. I have nothing in my hand that can win this for me, but I get to draw a card. I have no way of summoning a monster that can beat him - in my hand or in my deck - but I do know that i have this card in there somewhere:

And, again, my deck is probably about 200 cards so the odds of getting this are much lower than the 1/40 a normal deck would have.

But I hope. And I draw. And it comes up. I equip it on my monster, gain an extra 1000 ATK (I have no idea if this was a legal move, but that's how we interpreted this card on the playground) and destroyed my friend's monster, winning the game.

I have never felt more like a champion duelist than in that moment.

And I don't think that's something you could really get with Pokemon or Digimon or whatever. Because those games were usually videogames and not card games (I know they both had card games, but at my school at least they were videogame properties with anime adaptations, the card games were not played) there was a lot less of that. You had to follow the games' built-in rules and those rules didn't let you encourage Pikachu to hold on with just 1 HP, look back at you, and then fire off a super turbo critical hit to win the title of Pokemon champion. And if you did happen to get some kind of crazy luck it often felt less like you did something to earn that, and more like the game was just programmed to let it happen.

But with Yu-Gi-Oh card games, children felt like they could change fate itself.

So, I think it was an extremely fun game to play.

Also, this is not a new observation, but the Shadow Realm is way cooler than the original anime's "they just die" story.

[bluntblade]

Thanks very much for the tag @sinvulkt - here we go...

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

71 as of just last weekend.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

484,157

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Primarily Star Wars (and that mostly Sequel Trilogy, though I written some High Republic and a little Original Trilogy and Clone Wars), Horizon: Zero Dawn/Forbidden West and The Horus Heresy (WH40K)

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Fire Hawk, Snow Thrush (Horizon Zero Dawn/The Frozen Wilds)

Episode IX: Resurgence and Reckoning (Star Wars Sequels)

Rex's Ruminations (Star Wars: The Bad Batch)

In the Footsteps of a Death Seeker (Horizon Zero Dawn/The Frozen Wilds)

Treat it like a Duel (The Horus Heresy)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

If I get a comment then yes, I absolutely respond. They're relatively sparse for me, so I appreciate them very much.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Angstiest ending, you say. I'm kind of bad at sitting in a bad feeli- no, I tell a lie. It's absolutely A Fine Officer, A Good Soldier. Captain Appo locked inside his own head by the Order 66 programming, watching helplessly as his body advances on the Jedi Temple with a blaster in his hands...

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I'd say my Episode IX but there is a big sad beat toward the happy ending, so really Fire Hawk, Snow Thrush carries the day here.

8. Do you get hate on your fic?

Luckily no. My shipping choices and maybe other elements make my fics pretty niche, but that also means that I'm not involved in shipping drama, and I don't seem to enrage anyone to the point of leaving angry comments.

9. Do you write smut?

You won't find any under this moniker, that's all I'll say.

10. Do you write crossovers?

I don't presently, although, a year after everyone seemed to be drawing Spider-loys there is a full-on "Horizon characters as Marvel comics superheroes" AU running riot in my head (with Aloy dating Ikrie, who's X-23 Wolverine, Talanah as Hawkeye, Erend Odinsson, Helis as Venom and Regalla as the Prowler). If I ever free up the spare brainpower... maybe that'll happen.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yep. It was one of those "steal fics to sell" trawls and it was very odd.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I haven't, but if anyone would like to, please drop me a message.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Not since my time in the Brotherhood of the Lost "alternate Horus Heresy" AU project, and that was fairly sparse too. I like collaborating more broadly, but when it comes to the writing itself, I prefer to fly solo.

14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?

Rey/Kaydel in Star Wars, and Aloy/Ikrie in Horizon. I can't choose between those two.

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Probably one of my Sequels-era fics, set between The Last Jedi and Resurgence and Reckoning. I have some WIPs that threaten to be very plotty and I just don't have as much spare time as I used to. Also I have some OC apprentices for Rey and Finn, whose stories I really want to begin telling and promise to let me move the older characters forward as well.

16. What’s your writing strengths?

Probably my action writing. I read a lot of action and films and tv influence my prose a lot. I think a lot about rhythm, dynamics and all that stuff, and I just enjoy it, which probably helps.

17. What’s your writing weaknesses?

Mystery? I'm yet to really try to write one tbh, but I look at something like Glass Onion or Silo and just struggle to imagine coiling my brain into those shapes.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I've only used it the once, I think, and very much for comic effect. It depends very much on how long a scene is, and how much I want to emphasise a language gap.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Horus Heresy

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Err. Arrgh. I really can't answer that. But I am very proud of my recent Star Wars: Lost Stars one, so let's say Stars' Flight.

Not tagging, but feel free to run with this :D

[silkflovvers-art]

HI! I was obsessed thinking about your writing for the dragonbedo threadfic again and was looking to read it again and saw on here that you were reformatting it. I thought it was a super cool idea and know you're probably still working on it/its on pause but was wondering if there was anyway/where I could read it again. I might not have checked everywhere so if I missed it opps but yeah I have dragonbedo brain worms

This is actually my art only blog, so you won't find any of my fics here! However, @silkflovvers is where I actually update more often about my fics, though those updates are few and far between.

The rest of your ask is answered below so as not to clog up people's dashboards!

As far as the DragonBedo thread-fic, it is being reformatted and edited. Previously, the outcome was decided by Twitter polls and the story was linear based on what people chose. But I have been considering turning it into a choose your own adventure game using a text oriented game engine called Twine.

However, doing that means I would be writing every single route and choice possible. In the game, every single choice would have a result and then more choices and more results. In my head I already have at least 8 separate endings I would like to do. I have done some of my research for the characters and have started a VERY bare bones outline, but not much else. Unfortunately a game like that would take a very long time to write, code, and play test.

So, the full version will take a while to complete and I've temporarily set it aside until I have fully completed my zine work and managed to scrounge together a merch catalogue worth of items to sell at a local con (hopefully in spring or summer of next year). So I won't even begin work on the game until next summer. Ideally, I would release it in installments as each individual route was completed. That way people could still play the game as I continue to work on it. The full version would then include extra routes or secrets the individual routes did not have. Gotta up that replay value.

I'd be willing to post what I have of the linear version of the story so far to AO3 for people to enjoy until I can start work on the game. I did write the next part of what would have been posted to Twitter had it not turned into even more of an AI scraping cesspool. I just need to get it AO3 ready. After it's posted to AO3, I'll make a post about it on my non-art-only blog so it's easy to find! Or you can just keep an eye on my AO3 to see when it's posted? That may be more reliable, actually. I constantly forget to make Tumblr posts for my fics...

ANYWAY, I'm very happy to know someone else out there has DragonBedo brain worms. I actually worked a little on the character research portion this week, but didn't get super far. Child's character got a bit of a revamp and I got more real world inspiration for Rosaria and Kaeya's. In the mean time, if you ever want to know more about the AU or the possible love interests, you are more than welcome to send an ask on my other blog and I will happily gush about it!

[readwing]

Anyways, here's the books I read last year (that weren't manga or cookbooks)-

The Beautiful and Damned, F. Scott Fitzgerald

Sister, Kjell Ola Dahl (#......like 7 or 8 in the Oslo Detective series)

American Prometheus (Oppenheimer biography), Kai Bird

Matilda, Roald Dahl

Blackmail and Bibingka, Mia P. Manansala (#3 in Tita Rosie's Kitchen)

Homicide and Halo-Halo, Mia P. Manansala (#2 in Tita Rosie's Kitchen)

The Moving Finger (Miss Marple #4), Agatha Christie

The Love Hypothesis, Ali Hazelwood

Ymir, Rich Larson

I'm not sure how to put these in an order of what I liked the most because I read them for different reasons so I'll just do a drive by:

Ymir - Started with the pedal to the floorboards and did not let up one bit. One of my favorite flavors of sci-fi is when the narrative is unabashedly About Somewhere Else. Loved how the protagonist could not move through the story without somehow cutting everyone around him, and I loved the traumatic, unresolved tension between him and his brother. Probably my favorite book by vibes alone

Sister - I adore the Oslo Detective series, for reasons that possibly scratch my brain and my brain alone. It's so dry and uninterested in selling you melodrama. I want to study the way this guy writes his interview scenes; they are the main way the detective work gets done and they work so fluidly. They never slow down the pace to make sure you're keeping up. This was a particularly fun installment, seeing one of the lead two detectives on his own doing PI work after having quit, although the cases took brutal turns.

The Moving Finger - Loved it. Love how AC is just out there inventing characters whole cloth that you'll never meet again, but as soon as you meet them you're like 'oh, wow, you're not just a character you're like a full ass person.' I loved this installment in particularly because the dynamics between the characters were just so fascinating?? Once again, I've yet to correctly guess an AC mystery. Better luck next time.

Matilda - read it for a fic I am writing. Spent most of it getting big feelings and marveling at how completely fucking accurate the live action Mara Wilson movie was. Like there were entire scenes where I was like 'this is the movie, this is exactly what happened in the fucking movie.' Great book, but also wow that movie was a wonderfully accurate adaptation.

American Prometheus - Two things I like in a biography: research and calling out when the research didn't yield anything and/or yielded contradictory records. While I struggled to get through the political back half, particularly the bits leading up to the trial, this book was an interesting look on the development of scientific ethics in the twentieth century and on how today's scientific community today is still shaped by the political machinations of the past.

Both of the Tita Rosie's Kitchen books - it's a food-themed setting for a murder mystery book (which is like it's own genre now, which is cool). Relatively easy read. I think the author is still growing into herself, but one thing that she does well is mystery-plotting. Another thing is food descriptions.

The Love Hypothesis - Mainly read it because I owned a copy. It was... probably more enjoyable for people who like romance. Given that it is a romance book. But I do try to read a bit of everything, because I think each genre has something to bring to the table story-wise. This one had some very nice getting-to-know-you moments between the characters, who had good chemistry, but I think where it was weakest was in giving similar moments to the side characters, who often felt one dimensional. The story beats about feminism and institutional unfairness could've been less heavy-handed. For something that was relevant to the plot, it often felt like the author knew they were supposed to say something about it but couldn't figure out how to say it in a way that hadn't been parroted before, which is a shame because the scenes where the protagonist actually had to deal with those issues played well.

[ginnotwist]

What is your favorite jojo part? And favorite character? I have noticed that people who like both jjba and enstars can often be the smartest most nuanced people youll have the pleasure of talking to and i think you qualify

HIII okay preemptively putting this under a readmore since its just going to be me rambling. thank you though im glad u think my takes are good. it makes me happy to be able to discuss stuff (dreamy sigh) i love discussions

my fav jojo part kind of pingpongs between parts 7, 8 and 3. i think part 7 is exceptionally written. i love the characters i love their interactions i love their banter to offset the more serious tone and conflicts of the part. jesus christ corpse aside i think part 7 touches some very heavy issues with how johnny is handled and while things couldve been done better, i think it's good. i love part 8's entire plot and it feels like a murder mystery the whole time to me, at the beginning it feels quite silly but when the focus shifts over to the rokaka, the rock humans and gappy's origins thats where it starts getting really good. i'd rather not spoil since ik a lot of people havent finished reading p8 and i implore u to because p9 is just around the corner. p3 is just kind of. there. i feel bad because part 3 is just a hero's journey. it's not outstanding but i think it's charming in its simplicity. i like the characters and the stand fights and the format is silly and lets me turn my brain off.

ok fav characters... i'll try to narrow this down to 3. johnny, jotaro, and fugo. fugo probably the one i am most fond of (hes my milk webkinz). johnny aside, i feel like the other two are kind of simple characters but this is where my Tendency To Overanalyze Anything I Like kicks in so to me they're a lot deeper and fleshed out than they seem at first glance.

johnny, well...i see a lot of dislike towards johnny from certain parts of the community because of his (implied) depression and him being disabled. a lot of dudebros seem to see him as someone whiny and a "useless" jojo, comparing him to gyro which seems to do most of the emotional heavylifting this part. this is not at all true and i think both his and gyro's efforts are what result in them progressing in the race as well as johnny's own progress irt to the spin, in coping with his brother's loss, and finding purpose in himself. i am Not disabled, so i cant truly comment on how good of a representation he is but while one of his motivations is to obtain the jesus corpse to be able to walk again, this motivation is almost entirely set aside by the end of the part – and by the time he does 'gain the ability' to walk again for lack of a better term it's not at all the main focus. it's almost cathartic to see that when gyro passes away johnny thanks him for all he's done, but he's most certainly not making reference to his working legs, but rather, everything else. his best friend just died, and his main goal is to finish the race, and get his corpse back to italy. throughout the part gyro helps him find strength in himself to see that he is capable of more than he thinks (even though he can be quite harsh, i think this is exactly what johnny needs), and johnny's depression and survivor guilt when it comes to being alive while his brother, who he considers was better in every respect, is dead, is very realistic within the confines of what Can Be, in a story like jojo, and idk. when his neglectful father who left him to die comes back to greet him at the end of the race, begging for forgiveness, is essentially spat on by johnny because after all his growth he knows he deserves more than that, that he does not owe him forgiveness just because after years of mistreating him he's finally seen the error of his ways... stuff like that just kind of sells him for me. he feels so real. that and he's really cute and funny ✌️

JOTAROS A BIT HARDER TO TALK ABOUT BECAUSE he feels very flat. in part 3 you can argue hes just some angsty brooding teenager who's mean to his mom and punches shit. which is true. that's what it is on paper. idk though. i made a lot of shit about jotaro up in my head so a lot of this is going to be hcs and my interpretation of him. but i dont think he's ever really had a healthy outlet for his issues. i love holly, but she's always just kind of gone with what jotaro wants/says, and jotaro's never really had a father figure in his life. ofc he wants to save his mom when he goes off to egypt, it's almost all he has. then in egypt i like to think that meeting the other three and becoming friends with someone close to his age, kakyoin, he realizes things about himself that he never really considered, or wishes to put a name to. i think jotaro has a bit of internalized homophobia in regards to kakyoin and having lost him, his first love, at 17 fucks you up. i also like the interpretation that jotaro is autistic and this is one of the reasons he has such a hard time relating to people, voicing his thoughts and latched onto marine biology which is something that persists throughout his whole life.

i think one of the best things about jotaro is that he might seem underdeveloped in his own part but then in p4+p6 when he shows up enough has happened to him that you can infer some of his development behind the scenes. by p4 we know he has jolyne but travels around a lot and we know nothing about his spouse so we can assume his relationship with her isnt the best (this is confirmed in p6). going back to the internalized homophobia i think jotaro would take on a spouse because of comphet and because he feels like this is something that should be normal. keep in mind his father was also never around while he was growing up, so again traveling around and not spending time with his daughter, spending more time on speedwagon foundation business and his studies, and it never once occurs to him that this might not be the best thing to do (at the time). he's a lot more mature now and knows he cant use violence to solve everything, which is good, and tries to form lasting relationships with josuke, koichi and okuyasu. he's trying to make progress

and then p6 rolls around and jolyne is grown up and we find out that yeah jotaro was a pretty shit dad. our suspicions were correct. he was never around, he's always had fights with jolyne’s mother not because hes violent but because hes completely disinterested. again, the comphet, but also: he's out of the house all of the time on spf business because he wants to keep jolyne safe. to this day the effects and losses of egypt still rest heavy on him and marine biologist work aside he doesn't want the same fate to befall jolyne. him sending her the brooch is a last resort for her to protect herself. when hes awake during the part he's trying to make it up to jolyne, in his own way, and he loves and protects his daughter until his dying breath (this brought me to tears, btw part 6 is a ride). also i rly think he loved kakyoin his whole life. idk. i think jotaro can be pretty tragic depending on how you see him. which is why i love him but he also makes me sad as fuck because i think after p3 he spends his whole life lamenting the trauma he suffered when he was 17 and forcing himself to suck it up; ofc this doesnt excuse him being a shitty father to jolyne, i think she deserves better, but... you know

NOW FUGO!!!!!!! This is all going to sound delusional. bear with me. fugo is literally in p5 for like 2 milliseconds so ill explain how /i/ see him. but also keep in mind ive read phf like 3 times. OK SO fugo is this moody ass 16 year old with extreme anger issues -- while most of the time hes mature, good with people with only a bit of snark, he has an explosive temper that stemmed from his childhood. he was a prodigy child, he got into university at the age of 13, but was for the most part neglected by his family (not including his grandmother), his parents only looking after him/demanding More from him when it came to his studies/extracurricular activities. his family is new money, so they need fugo to excel in life to ensure that they are not taken lightly.

here is where stuff kind of varies: in the anime, he is almost sexually harassed by a much older uni professor and in a fit of rage beats him over the head with a heavy book. in the novel and the manga i think it just comes from the teacher mocking him (in the novel he gets pissed off because his grandmother died prior and the teacher belittled him for failing an exam when he had requested to not take it) but the consequence is the same: hes kicked out of uni and disowned by his family to not blunder the family name, making him homeless. time goes by and he's taken in by bruno and hes the first one to join his gang under the guise of needing a "level head" (ironic bc bruno knows why fugo ended up on the streets).

then the actual events of p5 happen and he actually leaves the gang really early on as bruno had decided to betray the boss. fugo is inept emotionally and prefers to not face the wrath of the boss, narrowly avoiding his own death LOL and then being like ok why did they ditch me. 

he doesnt understand why bruno and the rest of the gang would throw away their lives for some girl theyd just met. he's logical, emotion-driven only when it comes to himself. hes moody, as a teenager should be, but after joining brunos gang becomes heavily reliant on routine, on being told what to do, and despite all of the gang related activities they carry out, is likely the only time he's ever been able to be a kid/someone's child. from here on we dont see him at all unless you read his spin-off novel which is technically not considered canon by a lot of ppl bc its not by araki, but its overseen by him and the illustrations included are all provided by him. but basically i like fugo for a lot of the same reasons i like kakyoin: that being hes a socially inept introvert who had no friends until the main story and didnt realize what they had until it was too late

(PHF SUMMARY HERE) after the events of p5, with bruno, abbacchio and narancia dead, giorno as the head of the mafia seeks him out to carry out a mission to exterminate the head (happens to be an old university classmate of his) of this group selling drugs under the passione's name. essentially a suicide mission if it goes wrong. hes tasked to go with sheila e. (girl, same age as boss' daughter approx.) and murolo (middle aged man). they butt heads quite a bit but grow rather close. thru various parts of the novel hes still on some Dumb shit with his anger issues like nearly killing sheila e. when she caught him while he was falling bc he was still seeing red from the enemy. otherwise this part he just kinda comes off as depressed, less explosive. without going into much detail about the fights or what actually happens, he begins to trust people, i think. he doesnt see Everything as if the world was against him and it makes me rly happy for him. like up until this point hes never been Alone alone, but has alienated himself from others bc he feels that they dont understand, or that theyre too different from him, too dumb. very this ⬇️

im going to link to a post i wrote a while back about some phf fugo thoughts because this post is already long enough

anyways i think im done here. i hope this was satisfying and good. i went on a bit of a tangent irt fugo and jotaro because i feel like unlike johnny people dont really tend to look at them with the same depth. i also think i am just out of my mind. if youve read this far i love you