#i'll be real i have THOUGHTS on the lords of fortune

[alongtidesoflight]

OH AND YEAH I FORGOT HE REJOINED BEST GIRL FOR A WHILE

look at his doe eyed ass GO

[titania-sleeps]

could we have more of depraved angel? 🥺🙏 Pleaseeee Dom him hard already

hiii ty for loving him, he loves you back sooo much :D i'm glad you're so eager cause he's already begging for it (if you squint hard enough precum is already there and you haven't done anything yet!)

this is coup de grace from his pov so you get to see all the thoughts in his silly head. (there are none. head empty no thoughts he just wants you.)

i'll release other content later :3

Coup De Grâce (Angel!Yandere x Nun!Reader) His POV

this is the continuation of this post

if you want to see this from your pov, click here (i recommend reading from your pov first)

warning: nsfw, dom reader (implied afab), dacryphilia, implied somnophilia (but it's like,,, not real cause you're awake), minors DNI pls

The curtains parts, moonlight trickling through the cracks. You lay in your bed, breathing steadily. Your eyes are closed. Not a single eyelash moved.

He swallows air. He is the angel, but he is convinced that there exists a halo around you. He pauses his movements, taking a second to take in the breathtaking scene.

Slowly, he drifts over your hardwood floor and lands on your bed. A soft thump echoes as he finds his spot next to you, as he does every night. His fingers dance around his cock, bringing it out from his robes. A smear of wetness accompanies his hands. Truly, he is enamored.

He shifts closer to you, using his hand to guide his head to where your ass is. He shudders in anticipation, allowing his hips to move against your form.

The initial feeling is grasped in sin. His body fills with a warmth far greater than that he could find in the embrace of the divine Lord. He muffles his whimper. There exists a ring in hell for individuals such as him, in the Second Circle, but perhaps he belonged in the center of hell. He is a heretic, yet he is fortunately not favored. He would not be cast down to pay Lucifer companionship.

Mikhael clutches your hand, his body shifting closer to you. He gasps, his cock sliding against your ass clumsily. He moves languidly, cautiously, afraid you will wake up. You are an unwilling partner in his sin, and all that he can do to absolve you of your guilt is to ensure you stay like that.

He moans softly into your ear, his hand tightening around your hand. His fingers slip through yours as he shivers from the stimulation. His hips stutter against yours shyly, though his tiny gasps and breathy moans betray his desire to do more.

He wants to melt into you, but before he can, he is flipped over by you. His eyes were closed, and now they open to perceive you. He blinks in confusion and wonder, the pupils of his eyes dilating. Then heat creeps up his face and overtakes it in a blossoming pink.

"Y-You can see me?" His mind buzzes in giddy joy. No human has been able to see him in the past, even those who proclaim themselves prophets. For you to see him, it must mean that his perverted love has been accepted. Then, just maybe, his love for you is holy, and you are his true god.

You don't respond to him; instead, he notices you lean down. Panicking, he closes his eyes before he feels your tongue on his lips, as though silently asking for permission to enter. He responds promptly by opening his mouth, allowing you to slip inside and envelop your tongue around his. He moans into the kiss, a wanton sound parting from his devoured lips.

He feels you pull away from him and he bites back a sad whine. You sit atop him, pushing your hair back. Your piercing eyes glare into his; that is how he knows you can genuinely see him. Your eyes look right into his soul.

"What's your name?" you ask. He jolts from your fingers folding into his.

"Mikhael," he replies, heart pounding. "How... can you see me?"

"Perhaps we're meant to be," you respond, leaning down to give him another peck. His organs flutter. So you are his destined god.

He whines when you pull away again, his hands reaching and wrapping themselves around your neck. He pulls you in for another kiss, submitting himself to your whims. Take control of him, take all of him, he is yours to consume and devour.

He is focused on your presence in his mouth until his body freezes from the feeling of your hand on his exposed cock, your fingers tickling his head. His hips buck and he groans; he smiles to himself as it seems to motivate you. Your slow strokes elicit moans from him.

"Mikhael, why do you follow me?" He whines when you pull away again. How cruel of you, to give him paradise to then cast him back into limbo. Your grip tightens on his cock.

"Love... you..." he mumbles quietly, averting his gaze.

You squeeze harder.

"I love you!" He gasps, his back arching. He feels your hand quicken its pace. You are smiling not unlike a goddess, especially with the moonlight hitting the gleam in your eyes. His heart is full, and he wishes he can present it to you fully.

"I've never had a celestial suitor before," you muse.

He is reduced to a whimpering mess, needy moans and groans escaping from his parted lips. His cock is angrily red, matching the hue of his face. His chest heaves as he closes his eyes, drops of tears falling from the corner of his eyes.

You lick his tears. He shakily breaks into a smile, knowing that you are now enamored with him as he is to you.

"I want to... finish..." he pleads, drunk on his perverted love. His cock throbs and his vision is dizzy, but you glow effervescently and he can only focus on you.

"Guess you're my guardian angel now," you laugh, your pace increasing. Mikhael moans, his body shuddering as his hips lift.

Bright halos of light convulse around you, your tempting smile nearly personifying agape. That is how he knows that you are the true being he is meant to serve. His body is absolved of his human sin, and his body experiences the weightlessness of a freed soul.

His cock trembles in your hand as it spews out cum. Minutes later and he is still cumming; he mutters incoherent noises. He is begging, pleading, imploring that you allow him the gentle presence of your lips on his, but you don't hear him.

As he comes down from his high, you peck his nose gently. His eyelids move slowly, staring at you with worship.

"I'm your guardian angel..." he repeats, humming softly to himself. He is more than your guardian angel now. He is your sole protector, a sworn fealty laid beneath your feet. He huddles closer to you, enjoying your warmth.

Perhaps he might be punished by his false gods.

But already his desire and his will were being turned like a wheel, all at one speed, by his Love which moves the sun and the other stars.

if anyone catches what the last line is i'll be happy

also i'll drop him trying to clumsily seduce you another day :D

-> masterlist

[redbatchedcumbermayned]

Dopamine Week fic recs - all Rogue Trader gift exchange fics!!!

Because I'm short on time this week, here's a link list to all the fics that have been written in the two Rogue Trader gift exchanges so far to celebrate the awesome people in this fandom and the great work they create!

First RT gift exchange May 25th*:

A smuggler and a thief by nikozaur - Jae x m!Rogue Trader

Some masks are borne of convenience, some of of necessity. Sometimes, it is difficult to distinguish which of them is the real face.

The last dance and the first by @theevilscribbler - Xavier Calcazar x f!Rogue Trader

After a successful meeting with the Lord Inquisitor during her Magnae Accessio, Cesselie von Valancius is surprised to find that Xavier Calcazar has lingered to enjoy the party a little longer. Will a less formal encounter pave the way to something more?

Part of the trial by Hackinslash - Marazhai x Sister Argenta

Enjoy two characters at their lowest ebb, fighting against the odds to get a taste of redemption and freedom.

Radiance on the bridge by @captastra Heinrix x f!Rogue Trader

Heinrix van Calox gets lost in thought as he watches Isidora von Valancius on the bridge of her ship.

A leap into the void by myself XD - Heinrix x f!Rogue Trader

Heinrix van Calox and Lethyan von Valancius spend a quiet evening in the observatorium. Things turn spicy fast and Lethyan finds out that even a Biomancer's willpower has its limits.

Second RT gift exchange August 17th:

Systematical; Sacrificial by @vossprime - Pasqal x f!Rogue Trader

The Rogue Trader and Pasqal discuss their blossoming entanglement, life after Commorragh, and Pasqal's mechadendrites. A strange ritual ensues.

Storytime by @holylustration Heinrix x m!Rogue Trader x Jae

Cassia's heard a tale from some midshipmen - and as everything one hears from the crew must be true - she's invited the Lord Captain and some friends to share the story. Not everyone is impressed.

We're tender mammals mostly by @gravelorded Pasqal x f!Rogue Trader

Mercy. Von Valancius knows it, even if she refuses to speak its name. A tech-priest knows to excise it to better understand the Omnissiah’s directive, but for her- for this moment only, he assures- he will try.

Closed Impetus by @vossprime - Heinrix x f!Rogue Trader

Rogue Trader Elena von Valancius and Inquisitor Heinrix van Calox find themselves at a spontaneous ball. Between investigating noble intrigues and fast dances, they have to ponder the status of their relationship since the Magnae Accessio.

A sound strategy by @theevilscribbler - Heinrix x f!Rogue Trader

As the siege on Eufrates II draws close and their future hangs in the balance, Inquisition Agent Heinrix van Calox is determined to ensure that all their plans are flawless, even at the cost of his own well-being. Fortunately, his beloved Rogue Trader is on hand to assist with his preparations… and even has a few interesting suggestions of her own!

Tender by @vitanithepure - Heinrix x f!Rogue Trader

Sometimes Heinrix van Calox needs a reminder that those that play with fire often get burned.

A Tech-Priest's heart by @captastra Pasqal x f!Rogue Trader

Pasqal slowly starts to learn that the heart, machine or not, still has a way of falling.

Down the line by Hackinslash - Marazhai x m!Rogue Trader

Marazhai Aezyrraesh wishes to taste some of Seth von Valancius's psyker powers, and his little pet doesn't dare refuse.

A rare flower amidst Chaos by myself - Heinrix x f!Rogue Trader

Lord Inquisitor Heinrix van Calox had always loved Lienna von Valancius. Yet duty had kept the lovers apart until now. Heinrix has been summond to Lyxus to attend a picnic, and he has a confession to make.

*if I missed a fic please send me a message and I'll add it promptly.

Now go and spread the love and discover some hidden gems!

[takamiwife]

song quotes that remind me of you and keigo’s relationship

DISCLAIMER: i am not supporting/endorsing any artists on this list who may be problematic, nor am i trying to erase the original meaning of any songs

💌 if you’d like another one of these pls lmk!! <3 💌

—————————————

“good little girl

always picking a fight with me

you know that i’m bad, but you’re spending the night with me

what do you want from my world?

you’re a good little girl.”

- good little girl ; adventure time soundtrack

“i was all on my own

almost glad to be alone

until love came in on time, on time”

- loving is easy ; rex orange county

“spending the years together

growing older every day

(every day)

i feel at home when im around you

and i’ll gladly say again

i hope the encore lasts forever

now there’s time for us to spend”

—

“this right here still feels like the honeymoon

when you say my name,

nothings changed

i’m still a boy inside my thoughts

am i meant to understand my faults?”

- pluto projector ; rex orange county

“honey i belong with you and only you, baby

only you, my girl, only you, babe (you)

only you darling, only you babe (you)”

- dark red ; steve lacy

“oh, oh, oh, i, i was a city boy

right into danger’s where i’d

always run, a boy who had his fun

but i wouldn’t have done all the things that i have done

if i knew one day you’d come.”

- if i knew ; bruno mars

“when my time comes around

lay me gently in the cold dark earth

no grave can hold my body down

i’ll crawl home to her”

—-

“my babe would never fret none

about what my hands and my body done

if the lord don’t forgive me

i’d still have my baby and my babe would have me”

- work song ; hozier

“hey, hey, hey, lover

you don’t have to be a star

hey, hey, hey, lover

i love you just the way you are

for love is just the same

without fortune or fame

just give me true love and understanding

true love and understanding.”

- hey lover ; the daughters of eve

“my baby here on earth

showed me what my heart was worth

so, when it comes to be my turn

could you shine it down here for her

‘cause my love is mine, all mine

i love mine, mine, mine

nothing in the world belongs to me

but my love, mine, all mine

nothing in the world is mine for free

but my love, mine, all mine, all mine”

- my love mine all mine ; mitski

“all those days chasing down a daydream

all those years living in a blur

all that time, never truly seeing

things the way they were

now she's here, shining in the starlight

now she's here, suddenly I know

if she's here, it's crystal clear

i'm where I'm meant to go

and at last I see the light

and it's like the fog has lifted

and at last I see the light

and it's like the sky is new”

- i see the light ; tangled soundtrack

“and oh, we started

two hearts in one home

it's hard when we argue

we're both stubborn, I know

but oh

sweet creature, sweet creature

wherever I go, you bring me home

sweet creature, sweet creature

when I run out of road, you bring me home”

- sweet creature ; harry styles

“you’re making me crazy

really driving me mad

that’s alright with me

it’s really no fuss

as long as you’re next to me

just the two of us”

- my kind of woman ; mac demarco

“you're afraid to meet someone

'Cause you've been burned, you've been burned, you've been burned

love is good until it's gone

that's what you learned, what you've learned, what you've learned

you don't have to hide your love away and

i know that i'm gonna make mistakes, but

leaning on somebody isn't easy

i'll do what i can to make you see that

this is not a temporary love

this is not a temporary love

now your heart is in my hands, i won't give it up

this is not a temporary love”

- temporary love ; ben platt

“i will not ask you where you came from

i will not ask you, neither should you

honey just put your sweet lips on my lips

we should just kiss like real people do”

- like real people do ; hozier

“oh, won't you kiss me on the mouth and love me like a sailor?

and when you get a taste, can you tell me what's my flavor?

i don't believe in god, but i believe that you're my savior

my mom says that she's worried, but I'm covered in this favor

and when we're getting dirty, I forget all that is wrong

i sleep so I can see you 'cause I hate to wait so long”

- sailor song ; gigi perez

“she is the sweetest thing that i know

should see the way she holds me when the lights go low

shakes my soul like a pothole every time

took my heart upon a one way trip

guess she went wandering off with it

none like most women I know

this one will bring it back whole”

-

“that every night i'll kiss you, you'll say in my ear

oh we're in love, aren't we?

hands in your hair

fingers and thumbs, baby

i feel safe when you're holding me near

love the way that you conquer your fear

you know hearts don't break around here”

- hearts don’t break around here ; ed sheeran

[enrychan]

so I finally beat DATV and I guess I'll write something about it while downloading BG3 (an early Christmas present from my best friend, a couple of days ago <3)

light spoilers under the cut

my main thought at the moment is just "meh". Thankfully DATV isn't a trainwreck like Andromeda, but it never exceeds the 6 or 7 out of 10 that I gave it while I was still playing it. The ending is good, but the results of such world-shaking events feel too rushed and not completely earned.

That's far from my main issue with the game, though. I don't think I can put all my thoughts in order at this time, so I'll just make a list of things that stood out to me, in a semi-random order.

I feel like I'm beating a dead horse at this point, with all the people already talking about it, but this story is completely toothless. In previous games Thedas felt real because of all the different struggles between its factions, and even many in-group rivalries/prejudices. But in Veilguard Rook's allies are all completely devoid of conflicting characteristics or problematic aspects. The Crows are fearless freedom fighters without a trace of all the very dark traits they had in the previous games. The Lords of Fortune are Good Pirates that raid in a 100% culturally conscious way. Even giving Minrathous to the Threads - a literal crime syndicate - has no major impact on anything, not even your own relationship with Neve. You don't even see any trace of slavery in the literal capital of the Tevinter Imperium.

On the other hand, the Wardens still retain at least some of their most "problematic" aspects, for which I was grateful. They were a small pinch of salt on an otherwise very bland meal.

Rook's companions were for the most part treated the same way, devoid of any real conflict whatsoever. I was hoping to see some fights between Lucanis and Davrin, or between Taash and Emmrich. but everything solved itself very easily in the space of like. one conversation, maybe. And I'm not even mad about that, specifically. In Mass Effect, Shepard solved some conflicts by just inserting themselves between the two bickering companions and telling them to shut the fuck up. Rook doesn't have that kind of charisma, though. Luckily for them, their companions apparently don't have strong enough opinions to sustain any kind of serious discussion. I mean, I always thought that one of the most interesting aspects of this series was having strongly opinionated companions, each representing a certain way to see the world and its problems. but maybe I'm wrong.

I'm not saying that the companions were bad. actually they were nice (a little too nice tbh) and sometimes some conversations rang true and heartfelt. Which frustrated me even more! At least I just disliked the Andromeda companions. These though... they had so much potential! Urrgghghghghhh

The Rivaini/Qunari and non-binary stuff about Taash was painful. It was written so badly. I could almost hear Bioware asking if it was politically correct enough from behind the courtains. And I was like. Man idk. Aren't these pirates? Why must you defang and declaw them to this point? It sounds so fake.

Isabela, my beloved, what have they done to you? like 99% of the pirate!Isabela headcanons that you see on tumblr is better than this. I could cry, but I'll just pretend that that was a lookalike. The real Isabela was out there on the sea, pirating with her crew. And a really big hat.

To steal Hbomberguy's words, "it's a smooth and palatable pebble that isn't particularly disagreeable, but slides out the other end completely undigested". He used this phrase for Deus Ex: HR but I think it fits DATV perfectly.

On the same topic, I romanced Lucanis, because of course I did. A dark, deadly, tortured spanitalian assassin abomination? That's basically My Trash(TM). Unfortunately, with the exception of a single moment where the whole thing risked getting almost interesting, for the rest it was a pretty boring romance. Which is INSANE to me. How?? How do you screw up something like that?? Where's the drama?? The passion??? Anders was a sad wet man from the sewers and he managed to be more passionate than this???

Some conversations between him and Rook were still cute, though. I just wish there was more to it.

I loved the environments, in general. They were very beautiful, sometimes even stunning. I didn't particularly like Arlathan, it felt cramped and it was excruciating to explore with all those doors and barriers and magic bridges. But the other maps were lovely. My favorite were the dark and creepy ones, of course. I loved the Grand Necropolis, and also everything relating to the Wardens.

On this note, I loved IN THEORY the idea of bringing back the darkspawn hordes. I've always loved those, they remind me of Origins, which is always a good thing.

I said "in theory" because in practice I HATED the new combat system. I can live with the Mass Effect-like combat, but the fact that the two companions are immortal while the only one to take damage is Rook is just complete bullshit. My squishy mage was constantly bombarded by enemies' attacks on every possible front, to the point that in the tougher fights she could only run around and sometimes give orders on the fly so her companions could maybe kill the creatures in her place (and they were bad at it). I tried for many hours to make it work, and I did get pretty good after a while, but I HATED every single minute of it and in the end I lowered the difficulty level just to get to the end more quickly. Just awful. I'm guessing that's what remains of a previous "live service" version of this game. Ugh.

The music was another complete disappointment. This series had an incredible record of banger after banger ever since Origins, and I'm one of the like. Five people that actually loved most of Inquisition's soundtrack. But this time it's just generic_RPG_music.mp3, apparently. Hans Zimmer my FOOT.

I'm a fan of Hans Zimmer, and that's NOT him. Or maybe it's him when he has 0 ideas head empty idk.

Bioware should have just asked Trevor Morris again. The only times in Veilguard where the music tugged at my heartstrings, it was Inquisition's soundtrack. It's a real shame, because a good soundtrack can really elevate even a mediocre experience.

The result of all these factors, is that in the end I didn't really care much for these characters, so I wasn't that worried to lose them. This version of the "suicide mission" was rather relaxed for me.

(In ME2 I thought I would panic and die IRL at some point)

There were a couple of moments near the end where I actually Felt a lot of Feelings, not because of Veilguard, but because of everything from the previous games. Nevertheless, they added something to a generally dull experience, so those were good.

I loved Assan. I loved griffons in general. They reminded me of my dogs, and i live for my dogs.

Also I loved the hair physics. My Rook had beautiful red curls. And freckles <3

[lehdenlaulu]

Okay, 40h in, some stray thoughts:

I keep going back and forth between 'oh it's not really that bad after all' and 'ugh why' basically. Every time there's actually a nice bit of writing etc. the frustration at some other aspect soon takes over.

I'm particularly not fond of the random faceless mook hordes that keep respawning in certain locations (seriously, DA2 was bad enough). Or the dumb pointless boss battles you have to do in order to unlock new areas in the Fade where your reward is... another boss battle. And more faceless mooks. And maybe some gear. And maybe more of Solas's tedious sob story if you're lucky. The ghost of the live co-op thing really keeps quite literally haunting the narrative.

Oh, and there's even a fucking gladiator arena. I'm guessing that was originally for PvP. And now it's just there just in case you didn't already get your fill of combat elsewhere. And wanted to ogle Isabela who now inexplicably wears only a bikini and thigh-high boots. Because apparently that's Rivaini cultural outfit now or something? Some pseudo-Aztec thing? Sure. Whatever.

Honestly, just imagine if they'd put as much time and effort into making sure the story is narratively sound and makes any kind of sense as a sequel to its predecessors as they did into crafting the combat system and the needlessly byzantine combat skill tree. *sigh*

I do really like the new exploration mechanics though. I like that I can strafe on narrow ledges and vault over fences and through windows and such. Not super fond that I can magically just use my absent companions' exploration abilities because of my mystical magical all-powerful MacGuffin, though. Guess some people really don't feel like changing their party composition ever. 🙄

And that's another thing. This game coddles the player way too much to the point of treating us like particularly dense toddlers. Not only are there tons of visual options that basically guide you by the hand and point out everything relevant (all of which I obviously immediately turned off) but the dialogue also will very unsubtly tell you what to do at every turn. Like... Taash, babe, we're both Lords of Fortune, I don't think I need to be told to check out if there's something behind the waterfall. And if someone is so new to RPGs to not know something that basic, they need to discover it for themselves, not have it spelled out to them. Honestly, I thought this game's age limit was 18, not 12.

Speaking of Taash and all things unsubtle... I feel like there was a way to introduce their struggle with gender identity in a less... anvilicious way. And maybe come up with some in-universe lore and terminology instead of just defaulting to modern real-world vocabulary. The codex entry in particular frankly felt like breaking the fourth wall and talking directly to the player. And I say this as someone whose own gender identity is pretty nebulous.

Frankly, I'm surprised someone hasn't already literally told Bellara she has ADHD. Yet. I'm guessing she and Taash are relatable to some players, but to me they feel... vaguely insulting, honestly, because it really is about as subtle as a brick in the face. I'm also getting the vibe they're both someone's self insert to some degree at least. Which isn't new for DA, but... yeah.

What else... Oh. Yeah. The less said about the main plot the better. Varric, this really is your worst book yet.

Speaking of Varric, it's pretty funny how he keeps telling Rook to please get some sleep. Sure, mate, would love to but a) all I get for a bed is apparently a bare divan in a room with a massive glowing aquarium b) every time I try to sleep some smarmy elf keeps mansplaining at me in my dreams. Which, you know, is something I shouldn't have in the first place as a dwarf. Maybe I should just start chugging coffee with Lucanis. (But honestly, only Taash and Davrin get to have actual beds, everyone else has to make do with cots, bedrolls, divans, and... an embalming slate??)

Oh, and I'll be really surprised if Varric survives this story. I mean, he's barely there in the first place and keeps talking like some ailing relative who secretly has consumption in a Victorian novel. I mean, his writer was laid off after all.

The pacing and structure of this game is extremely weird. The beginning was particularly rough, then it got better, but it's still a bit all over the place.

Oh, right. I'm fairly sure we were promised cool bard songs at some point. I haven't heard a single one yet. Unless that one street performer in Treviso strumming Enchanters counts, which I don't believe does. It was nice to hear it, though, as much as it was a bit contextually odd to choose that song in particular. Ah well, I guess Empress of Fire would have been even odder.

This is also the most forgettable Hans Zimmer soundtrack I have heard in my life. I can't think of a single theme or leitmotif off the top of my head, but the Inquisition theme on the other hand was instantly recognizable. I might say he's just new to writing video game soundtracks, but... dude's famous for his highly catchy, recognizable and evocative themes. Weird.

But hey! As much as I don't like the cartoony character models, the game is actually otherwise really pretty and has some really lovely visual designs in environments and architecture etc. It's also very stable and smooth for a brand-new game, I've only had one crash and two obvious bugs so far. That's always a big win for a studio. Too bad its actual problems are too baked in to be fixable with some patches.

Anyway, that's it for now. Lots of negativity, I know, but I actually do like playing this game for the most part. I just have to... not think of it as a Dragon Age, basically. Because for all the bells and whistles, or maybe because of them, it really doesn't feel like one. There are glimpses here and there of a great DA game it could have been, but unfortunately, the final result is a bit of a Frankenstein's monster of different and largely incompatible concepts hastily sewn together.

[pardi-real]

Tarot of Destiny / Chapter 2 - Tarot Reading

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Hanamaru: "So, what's Maginaria like?

......Any famous local alcohol or something?"

Teddy: "Mr. Hanamaru! We're going there on business, don't forget."

Hanamaru: "I know what you mean, Teddy. I'm just asking."

Berrien: "I'm not sure about the local alcohol, but… as I mentioned earlier, this town thrives on fortune-telling. They value spirituality a lot... Anything disruptive to the ambiance is frowned upon. Particularly during the festival, they prefer more dignified attire and behavior."

Yuhan: "I see… Dignified behavior, huh.... Then, I guess Mr. Hanamaru can't come."

Hanamaru: "Wait, wait, wait, wait. If you leave me here, I'll cry for real, okay?"

Flure: "Speaking of which... What's dignified attire?"

Berrien: "Fufu... Don't worry. I mean the kind of 'proper outfits' that Flure always makes for us."

Lono: "I see... Then I guess I'll be fine in this tailcoat."

Flure: "What– no way! You can't wear your usual clothes for a festival. I'll design something suitable for the festival in the city of fortune-telling!"

Lono: "Oops… Looks like the fire in Flure's soul is burning again."

Haures: "I'm looking forward to your designs, Flure, but... don't push yourself."

Teddy: "Let me know If I can help!"

Flure: "Yes! Thank you very much. Fortune-telling… I wonder what design would fit~…"

Berrien: "Ah, yes, speaking of reference... Lady Elvira gave me these 'envelopes', it might help."

> " 'Envelopes'…?"

Berrien: "Yes. It is addressed to all of us, including the lord. I've checked mine, and if my assumption is correct, the contents might give us clues for the costumes."

Berrien handed out the envelopes one by one to the butlers.

Berrien: "Three left... one for you, my lord."

> "Thank you"

Berrien: "Yes ♪ And this one... 'To Mr. Talking Cat'... It's addressed to Muu, isn't it?"

Muu: "What! There's one for me, too? Ehehe… This might be the first time I've received a letter addressed to me!"

Berrien: "Fufu.  The last one is for Haures."

Haures: "Thank you. Without further ado… let's see what's inside. Hmm... this is…  Some sort of a 'card' is attached to a piece of paper... underneath it, there are sentences.

'This is the tarot card that represents you.' 'I hope this card will guide your actions… Hence, I hope it will be a guidepost for your life.'

This card... represents me? What does that mean?  I know that what is pasted on the paper is probably a tarot card… and appears to be pasted upside down. Is there a meaning to this?

Hmm... I don't know much about fortune-telling…"

Teddy: "Me neither... I only know what my lucky color is today."

Yuhan: "I know a little about Feng Shui… but I'm an outsider to tarot."

Hanamaru: "I see... no tarot hobbyist among us, then. So, Fennesz. Over to you."

Fennesz: "Huh… M-me...?

Hanamaru: "Yeah, you know, the knowledgeable Fennesz. I thought maybe you knew something about tarot readings… My bad. Bit much to ask, wasn't it?"

Fennesz: ".............. Uhm… I can tell you a bit… The card Haures got... is 'Justice' in 'reverse'.

In tarot reading, there are different types of cards and the concept of upright and reversed positions. Even if you draw the same card of 'Justice'... the meaning of the card will change depending on its position.

For example... the meaning of 'the card of Justice in reverse position' is 'to judge others harshly' or 'violence'... also 'excessive harshness' or something like that…"

Hanamaru: ".......Wow.  How do you even know all that stuff...?"

Fennesz: "D-don't set me up and act surprised now… I just happened to have read about it in a book and remembered it…"

Hanamaru: "Hehe, my bad, my bad. Just honestly impressed."

Haures: "But still... It didn't seem to have good meanings.  So, the reversed Justice card represents me…? Err… but I don't understand why."

Fennesz: "Uhm… but tarot cards have multiple interpretations... I don't think what I just said defines you, Haures…"

Haures: "Phew… Thanks, Fennesz."

Fennesz: "No, really... There's more to you, Haures...."

Haures: "Anyway... tarot cards are sent to all of us. If we refer to the pictures on these tarot cards.... It could help design costumes, right, Mr. Berrien?"

Berrien: "Yes… that's the idea."

Flure: "I see… That's right… I keep coming up with new ideas. Alright everyone, if you don't mind... Let me know your cards later!"

Hanamaru: "Yeah, got it.  By the way… I wonder which card is in my envelope~ let's see. ……… Ergh. The heck is this… 'DEATH'... It says 'death'. It's obviously an unlucky card."

Teddy: "Hmm~... It is true that it has an unlucky vibe, but... this card is 'reversed', isn't it? Maybe it doesn't mean what it looks like…"

Fennesz: "Yes, Teddy is right, Mr. Hanamaru. Death in the reverse position means 'rebirth' or 'change'... a reversal of fortune.

You will be able to get out of the pain of not being able to move forward and move on.... I think that's what it means. 

On the other hand, when it is in the upright position, it can mean the end of something, or farewell… and there are also many other meanings…"

Hanamaru: "Hmm~ I see. Well, if anything, I'm glad it's not upright."

Muu: "Fufu, regardless.... It's the same card, but the position changes the meaning... Tarot reading is so interesting, my lord!"

> "Yes, indeed"

Fennesz: "By the way... Which card was in your envelope, my lord?"

Fennesz asked me, and when I opened the envelope addressed to me... there was… the same card I had seen earlier....

> "It's Death in the upright position...."

Fennesz: "What…"

note: at least in English-speaking tarot, reversed Justice card means "dishonesty", "denial", "be careful with your emotions", and "injustice/unfairness/bias".

Reversed Death card means "fear of change", "refusing rebirth", "inability to let go/move on", "decay". While Death in upright position would mean "rebirth", "new beginnings", "transformation".

Well, I can find what Fennesz said in several Japanese websites though.

Prev | All | Next

[eraepoch]

TIL that AWS CEO Matt Garman is an unrepentant moron.

"Coding is just kind of like the language that we talk to computers. It's not necessarily the skill in and of itself," the executive said. "The skill in and of itself is like, how do I innovate? How do I go build something that's interesting for my end users to use?" [1]

I have never read an utterance more disconnected not just from the practical realities of development work, but from the very idea of materially productive work in general. These are the words of a chronic "ideas man" who has managed to delude himself into believing that labour does not exist, or at least holds no real value.

After all, his *very important* job does not require any amount of actual consideration or understanding of reality, so naturally he assumes that those of us with menial jobs where we actually have to *do things* are, I suppose, just making it up. Obviously our thoughts are equivalent to (and probably lesser than) those of the shiny new Ideas Machines that coincidentally don't come attached to a human body with pesky things like needs and limitations and rights.

(They also don't come attached to a source of Thought, but this will surely be patched into the next version.)

Fortunately for Mr. Garman, he lives in a walled, gilded village where things like quality and outcome and result don't need to matter.

"If you go forward 24 months from now, or some amount of time — I can't exactly predict where it is — it's possible that most developers are not coding" [ibid]

Yes of course, my lord. Whatever you say, my lord. If that is all, I'll be back to my desk, now.

---

[survivalist-anon]

Log 8: Terms and Con-chickens

It feels like it has been over an hour since Sten's and Aldercon's private meeting, now I'm just waiting in a big room with Toke and Fjord. Just observing them.

Toke is a more relaxed individual, he isn't too curious to mess around in this room. I don't blame him considering there's just old magazines, a few old, over worn couches, and a TV with what looks like a rather obvious sign that someone removed one of the knobs.

Fjord has tried everything from carving on the metal wall, taking short 2 minutes naps every ten minutes and shockingly got bored of that, and accidentally breaking the on knob of the old TV.

For me, I was curious about why were there so many older items in this room. It's even more unnerving considering there isn't even a two-window. Just a 30×25 ft room, with old coaches, a broken TV and magazines that have been collected over the years. These were such a strange array of magazines too. It looked less like something from a hospital waiting room and more from a thrift store collection of random and likely defuncted magazines from as old as the 30s. The 1930s of all decades, I was careful in flipping trough the fragile pages. Old worn covers showing either home improvement, politics, cars... just the usual things one would assume that would interest these men. Than there was the more miscellaneous ones; cooking, housing, automotive, a magazine soley on duck hunting from the 80's, there was an old 1939 Fortune magazine with a cover of a train track.

I got curious on a Film magazine from a few years back, celebrating the silver era horror movies from the good old days. Bella Legosi, Boris Karloff, and oddly enough my favorite of the actors Lon Chaney Jr.

As I was flipping through the pages, Fjord decided his boredom was better spent watching me flip through the magazine. I let him know occasionally when to change the page. He would comment on each monster, letting me know his thoughts on them. Some were a little more concerning than others, but I found his inputs interesting.

"Oh, I see you're planet has some interesting mutants....he's all green, and sort of sad lookin.... reminds me of a servertor actually.... always hated them, I never understood using criminals for such things.....", he commented. I wasn't sure if he was joking about the movie make-up or he genuinely thought these were real... considering what I've seen here I wouldn't doubt the latter.

"Hehe, no. It's movie make-up. It's to make believe it's real.", as I passed an article about the Frankenstein movie, the next page continues to Dracula.

His eyes widen a little and he tilts his head, pointing to the long dead movie star, "Toke! Come're! It's one of those bloody Night Lords, I think it's that Jago bastard!".

"What? Night Lords? Is that what you call vampires where you're from?", I ask with genuine curiosity.

Toke skoots over to see the picture, "hmmm...aye no lad....too clean...and look at his eyes. Those are too unnerving to be Night Lord eyes.", he says with certainty.

Looks like even the theatrical, ghoulish glare of Legosi is intimidating to them in some funny way. "When we get home, I'll show you guys these movies, they're slow and little unexciting in some parts but the climaxs are always interesting."

"Movie? Yeh mean for entertainment? Ugh. Strange. Turn the page lass.", so far this has been the most interesting thing that's been happening for a better part of two hours for him.

As I turn the page, the image of not just Lon Chaney Jr appears, but several images of werewolves that had been inspired by the Wolfman, predominantly from the 80's, I look to see Fjord and Toke's reaction, it was a strange mix of confusion, bewilderment and some where deep down inside, some level of self reflection.

"what matter of madness is this?", as Fjord remarked, the both of them couldn't help but feel conflicted about the page.

"ugh, oh, these are werewolves. They're people who are cursed to turn into a half wolf by the light of the full moon." I explained.

Fjord's was a bit perplexed, "...ugh...we have wolves... just not these?"

"Hmf, thats a wolf? Ha, I've seen bigger horrors looking in the mirror in the morn." Toke was a little more stern with his opinion yet he could see that our idea of werewolves were pretty simple. "Ha I like this one 'ere, he looks a bit like Grimnar.", he cackles a little, pointing not to a werewolf on the page, but an old local town explorer from the 1800's name Rupert D. McCainel. All I knew of him was he was the werewolf equivalent to Sir Arthur Conan Doyle with this obsession with fairies. He wanted to prove their existence so badly, he had gone to places like Transylvania and Greece to prove their origins. He was considered a quack even for the time.

However it was Fjord 's reaction that fascinated me. I'm certain he had a more complex opinion about it. By the look in his eyes, he had to.

He looked closely at all the images, some horrific and bloody. Then he looked at one image of the Wolfman holding the actress Evelyn Ankers. I could tell something was going through his mind about it. "ugh...do.... mortals like you fear these...ugh...wolfmen?...or celebrate them?", I could tell he was a little confused, but I wasn't sure why.

"I'm not certain the word 'celebrate' would fit but there are people who like them. I like them too actually, I've always seen them as more sympathetic monsters than something like a vampire. Vampires just drink blood, go and hunt people and pretend they're big shit.... werewolves in fiction made more sense to me. Always have. Many centuries ago, one of the first stories of werewolves predates stories of vampires. Plus they're stronger. A silver bullet is one thing, the amount of weakness vampires have is too many to take seriously.", I felt like I outted myself as a huge nerd at that point.

Yet, I turned to see that both Toke and Fjord were absolutely fascinated at what I said.

Fjord just stared at me, "so...you like werewolves then...", his demeanor had changed a little, it was a little more pensive, "....would you...also like wulfen?".

I didn't know what a 'wulfen' was, but Fjord looked pretty serious asking me this, so far he's been rather playful. Yet something about his question felt he wanted a more genuine answer.

Toke nudged him on his unhelmated head, "aye yah dolf, wulfen are a serious matter boy...so lass...it seems you know a lot about these creatures...do you hunt them?"

Fjord rubbed his head a little, flashing his fangs with a side smirk.

I was a bit taken back and bit flattered by the question, "ugh...no...as I said, to us they're not...well ...real....or at least we've always found explanations for their existence....but I guess with guys here....I'm going to assume I'm going to have to be open minded..."

Toke shakes head a little, "I guess....I only ask is because we three types of blood suckers."

Well this was unexpected, space werewolves and now space vampires....I'm halfway expecting space wizards, robot mummies and killer cockroachs. "Really?....are they...well ....as big as you guys too?"

Fjord gives a grin, "aye, all of us are. Some are even bigger."

Toke scoffs a bit, "unless you're Maximmion Voss. He's a wee bit taller than you actually lass."

Considering I am 5 ft 11, that means this Voss would blend in perfectly in a crow of people and none would be the wiser. "really? That's hard to believe, anyone above my height is above average actually."

"aww such a wee bastard he is.... isn't he like... really fat or somethin?", Fjord turns to Toke for clarification.

Toke takes a few seconds to pause and actually think about that, even so far as stroking his beard, "hmmm.......I don't know...one of these fists probably knows him...I heard he is pretty stout."

The loud click of the door knob to the room sent all three of us in a jolt. Aldercon and Sten had probably taken a glance just as we all slightly landed back in our seats.

Aldercon looked at us, somehow sensed something was different about the room and saw the TV was missing a knob, turned to us three and pointed. "You, fuzzball, you owe us a new Television set. Toke, you're heading to Nevada for a retrieval mission with Sten and I want no yaps, yips or barks about it. Miss Drake, you're going home without any further inconveniences. Fuzzball over there will escort you off the premise and back to your domicil.".

"What?!", Toke protested.

"Oh, um...thank you Chaplain Aldercon.", obviously I wasn't too upset but now I'm wondering what was going on.

"HOW DID YOU KNOW?! Are you a psycher????", Fjord's mind was blown as to how Aldercon could have deducted that he was the one broke the TV.

Sten wasn't too pleased with the fact he had to leave for this mission. "It has been agreed upon that as part of our terms. We will have to subsequently pay for the damages caused by us, and our services of recovery have needed for some time."

Aldercon turns to Sten, "Just don't ruffle the boy's feathers ok?".

"Ah yes, I am aware of the Raven Guard's set of personalities.... although loyal...I can imagine that their position is more complex than our Chapter's role in the Imperium.", he lets out a sigh. "Come, we will head back to your cabin, Lorey."

"Wait I don't understand, when do you have to leave? Tomorrow morning? How long you will be gone?", I was genuinely worried.

Toke came in with a few questions of his own, "oh I'm sorry, I forgot the part where I agreed to dis wee adventure, specifically the part about agreeing in the first place.... I was here with Fjord and the lass for two hours having a lovely conversation. And well." He sarcastically turns to me and Fjord, obviously trying to make a more humorous objection to all of this, than turns around to Aldercon, "I don't remember you being our chaplain.", cocking a brow. Of course he was still going to go, but not with breaking Aldercon's balls over it.

"Toke, I specifically requested you join me. If this wasn't a retrieval mission, I would have suggested for Fjord to join, for him to gain experience. However, we will be dealing with likely an AWOL Astartes at worst, or a rather disgruntled and troubled individual at best. I do not know this 'Wicket', and from what I've heard....this will take some elaborate planning", Sten concludes with a mildly defeated tone.

Toke huffs and cups his hands together, "Great....the bastard flies?", he shoots a frustrated whine.

Sten nods reluctantly, "It seems his favorite pass time challenging the Air Force to aerial races. His preferred location being wide open plains and deserts. Wise choice considering there are not many civilians who live in these dry places."

Finally cupping his hands to face, "it's going to be hot too...."

Fjord wasn't sure if he was greatful for or jealous of Toke by this point. "...I mean....if you want to trade duties so much..?"

I was a bit amused by this, never would have seen these types of personalities in these guys before. I wondered if it was something cultural or tribal about their 'chapters'. I just have so little context, yet I'm getting to know a generous amount about them.

"well we shall return to the cabin. I would like to at the very least see to that Lorey is returned safely to her home.", the reassuring tone from Sten did make feel better a bit better.

Aldercon unfortunately gave the facial expression equivalent of "-but". "You will be escorted to Wicket's location personally through my facility effective immediately. You will be leaving as soon as Miss Drake leaves the premise."

A low growl comes from Sten again, the whole situation feels almost like punishment in his eyes.

"As for you fuzzball, I had your measurements estimated through our security cameras and hopefully some of these auxiliary clothes fit you.", he moves out of the way, revealing Bilhard who had brought a large box of what could only be described as old clothes, hand-me-downs and leftovers from over the years.

Fjord didn't even look into the box, he took a whiff of the box and could tell everything in it has practically never been taken out. Clean, but the clothes would definitely need to breath. "I swear if any of these have bugs in 'em. I'll comeback here and get you.... wait what cameras?"

Aldercon just patted his back hard, "I would like to see you try. Also they're everywhere and roughly the size of a glass marble...each...Anyways, these are your civilian clothes. If you're going to be responsible for Miss Drake's safety you have to look a part.", he than takes a few steps towards me.

"As for you, young lady. Now that you're aware of a few details. Here is a list of members of your community who are aware of my facility's existence. They are the only mortals I trust with the knowledge of our fort. They have assisted us in the past. However....you must never.... disclose this location to anyone else. This fort is one of only a small handfuls of Imperium standard safe havens like this one, our existence...must not be disclosed either. Yes, you will see some outliers, loners and...well...as you've experienced....rouges....these are far and few between. There are indeed forces and entities who will want to take full advantage of us Astartes...i have experienced this twice...one was enough, the second was poor judgement on my part. Can I trust you with this responsibility?", he concluded his speech with the first genuine smile I've seen from him.

Somehow I felt a very serious danger from his warning, I would have felt fear earlier too. Now, I can see that these aren't some hard asses who just moved to our world mysteriously on purpose at least.

"You can count on me, sir", I give a rather simple but genuine salute.

He let out a light chuckle, "Ah just like your grandfather. In fact just like your great father even more so. Both were stubborn bastards. But one was the best soldier I could had fought along side with back over seas. The other...oh by the Throne what did he called himself again? 'Explorador?', oh I'll remember it later.", he nodded with a much more different solute, he put his hands crossing across his chest, both hands open. I do the same in an act of correcting myself.

I could see the others in the room doing the same.

I know one this is for certain, I have no idea what I am doing, or the significance of what I just did. The men liked it, that's good.

Considering my track record of remembering a large sum of historical analysis, I feel like I'm going to regret doing that solute some way or another.

South Wall:

14:25 hours

By this point, I've had to say goodbye to Sten and Toke in the meantime. Lucky for them, they would be gone for a week according to Aldercon. But I could feel that Sten and Toke weren't too thrilled about it, seeing how dedicated they are to my family it seems based on the history alone, they probably feel they're being pulled away from their mission I assume.

As I said goodbyes to the both of them, Sten had given me one more gift. It wasn't a tooth, but a carved stone rune with a few bead attached to the cord.

"Remember, we won't be parted for long.", he gave me a gentle hug.

I hugged his as hard as one couple with a suit of armor. "I know, good luck out there and please both you take care of yourselves."

Toke instead pats me on the head, "don't worry lass, we will take care of it.".

I watched as they entered, ironically enough, into the same transport vehicle, now with a large panel of steel patched on to the side. It was a large, metal military truck. I could see little of what was originally an acronym on the side, it has been removed and painted over....all I could make out was the letter, 'P', the rest I couldn't make out. I could still see the both of them waving back in the truck. As per Aldercon's conditions, only when I leave, they could leave.

Me and Fjord were escorted out through a secret gate that had been hidden by foliage. I turn around and wave goodbye, interestingly enough, what the had not occurred to Aldercon was the possibility of a few individuals that I personally knew would be able to find his fort in absolutely no time at all.... mostly by accident.

A few minutes later, me and Fjord had been walking a trail that had been created by the vehicles at Fort Dorn, finding our way back through a long stretch of highway. Going further south, we're heading towards the direction of the cabin.

I hoped to at least understand a little more about their interests and history with my family. What or how did this all happen, how long had it gone?

Answers I would have to wait until Sten and Toke comeback, because I would find out that Fjord actually doesn't know anything about my family's history with them. Only that he's been around for as long as I wasn't in Pine Hills, I would occasionally visit Grandpa in the spring for a week or so for a better part of childhood, moved out for a few years, then moved back for two highschool semesters.

During that time I learned how to camp, fend for myself in case I ever got lost, and how to properly shoot a bow and arrow.

One day however, Grandpa for some reason had the bright idea to leave me by myself for three days out in the forested area behind the cabin. My mom found out about the whole thing and had a falling out with Grandpa, after that we moved away to a different state....never to see him alive after that.

As we were walking down the road, just a woman and a tall armored man, Fjord was telling me all about his life where he was from... before he came here.

"-And so then, I hoped off the Thunderhawk right into battle! Hordes of heretics and bloodletters were swarming throughout the mountain side, I took my trusty ax and sliced through the blood iron crowd, like a flaming chainsword to a block of ice! Ah good times, after that battle, me and my squad were headed to a wee planet in a Forbidden World way out into the Belt. There were a legion of bloody Thousands Sons," he leans a little closer for dramatic effect, "our sworn enemies and traitorus scum of the legions of Chaos. It was during a scuffle on a cliff range were a warp storm had brewed furiously. Just as I was about to land a strike on a Rubric marine, the ground beneath us gave way, sending me and that scum into a whirling tunnel. One moment I was facing against my fear enemy once more...than the next second I was soaking wet! I landed in a lake nearby. Had my fun a bit throughout the land....very nice hunting terrain here. Than I found Sten and Toke, they were mingling with a local tribe 'ere, than from than on its been great. Comparatively lass, this place is a paradise!", his voice echoed throughout.

"Wow ...ugh, if you wrote all that down and made it into a book, I think people would like it a lot. You know...like a heroic memoir?", obviously, everything he had said was completely insane and I am having the most incredible time trying to comprehend everything. A galaxy wide war? My near Apolloian levels of prophecy activity making a lucky guess about space wizards.... everything was overwhelming....

"A memoir? Ha, I'm barely getting started lass!", he glanced to me, he was happy I was curious about his life. "So then, what about you? I'm certain you have some tales of yah own?".

I perked up a bit, "Oh no, not as exciting as yours I'm afraid. If I can start... I'd say...well....I was born in the spring time during the exiting year of 1998, embassy bombings, the Japanese winter Olympics, John Glenn returns to space for... astronaut business I suppose....and... denim clothes....hmmm what else ....grandpa taught me how to shoot an arrow when I was 5, I was dangerously close to petting a wild grizzly bear when I was 10. I'm a self taught artist, I had taken many years of science class, too many math classes....and finally settled into studying history....far less complicated."

He was listening so far, "what was your first hunt like?"

"hmm...well ....my first kill ...hehehe, actually it's a little embarrassing from a hunter's perspective but from a learning experience perspective....my first kill was a chicken, from our neighbor's farm", I gave a crooked smile.

"a chicken? What is a chicken???", he urgently asked.

Oh to describe domesticated poultry to someone was easier said than done, "ugh ...ok ....you know what a bird is right, a beaked animal with feathers, usually bipedal, they can be colorful or natural looking?"

His face became stern, "yes...hmm...I do.", I could only fathom what horrors he was thinking...I was not going to ruin his walk with that.

It was just then I realized I could actually help visualize chickens better. "Hmm... would you...like to see one?"

He turned his head suddenly, "YES! If we are lucky, I say we slay one for a meal.".

"ok, but don't be surprised if it is a bit underwhelming.", I try not get people too exited when it comes to some things, hopefully he gets a snack out of it. "I think one of my neighbor's property is here actually....one sec.", I take out my phone and call my neighbor (who's number I have to have in case of anything happens)."

The two of us wait on the side of the road waiting for a chicken farmer to answer his phone.

Luckily, he answered the call, "McGregor's Foul Farm, howdy we can be of assistance?", it was in all seriousness a terrible tagline for his business but it is his farm.

"Ah Mr.McGregor? It's me, Lorey, is it a good time to spot by and get some eggs something?", I did need some eggs, but considering I was going to have Fjord as a guest I suppose I was going to get some extra groceries. Ow my wallet.

"Ah sure thing Lorey, make sure you pop by soon. That Arlo fellow has been buying out my stock faster than my sweet gals can lay.", 'Arlo' was the current owner of the "Wonder Mart" store that was reluctantly built in town. At first it was a convenience, that is as soon as other businesses began to close, Wonder Mart was staying strong. The locals had made a campaign to shut it down but somehow the damn place still keeps going... likely it will still keep going until the sun blows up by this point.

"Thanks Mr.McGregor.", I hang up and look at Fjord. "Alright, we're taking a detour, this way!". The two of us head off into a thicket that leads right into McGregor's property, "hopefully his daughter, Anna, isn't around taking care of the fox population in "her side" of the property.".

"Who is this, Anna? Your enemy?", his question sounded like a joke, however remembering what had happened just a few hours ago was not....

"Ugh no.... buuuuut we do have a history. That chicken I killed? It was her pet.", it was one of my biggest shames.

Fjord nodded, "ah understood....do you want me to kill her?"

My blood went cold, "NO!", I wasn't too fond of her holding a grudge to the point of threatening to shoot me everytime I pass by but I would never ever consider the thought of ending myself.....at least not with my arrows....maybe hand to hand combat.

Fjord straighten up giggling. "I kid lass!"

~~~~~~~~~

Meanwhile, back at the cabin. Jeff...was waiting.

End of Log 8

@kit-williams @barn-anon @walking-natural-disaster

@egrets-not-regrets

[dgrailwar]

Further Servant details under the cut:

ARCHETYPE EARTH:

A beautiful princess of the Moon who hasn't yet tasted blood. In another world, her Class would be 'Funny Vamp'.

She serves as the soul of the Planet, and therefore possesses immense power and purity, raised as a delicate and well-mannered princess. As a Servant she is theoretically much weaker than she would be in her natural state, bound to a Saint Graph rather than the planet itself. Therefore, rather than being able to augment the Earth's rotation and treat continents like pinballs, she's simply only able to create destructive storms and earthquakes with a flick of her fingers.

A version of 'Archetype: Earth' that has retained her innocence, one that being bound to a world of 'Fate' has not met her own. A natural phenomenon in the shape of a girl, a soul who watches over humanity without understanding, an Archetype of the Planet that exists brilliantly and positively, with only the slightest curiosity of when her life will truly begin.

SESSYOIN KIARA:

A Buddhist monk of the Shingon Tachikawa Eiten School. A woman of calm composure and pure veneer.

She is a master Spiritron Hacker, a type of magus from the future that specializes in Code Casts. She thoroughly believes in the value of 'desire', and sees that as her own personal path to truth, making her an entity of unrelenting faith. However, as pure as she may seem, there are no truly perfect souls in the world, and those with seemingly no secrets to hide may hold the most sinister ones of all.

A precise woman, who can see those for who they truly are, while leaving herself an enigma. Like a hungry beast, she stalks her prey, slowly peeling away their layers and exposing their vices before going for the killing strike. While her style of battle is patient, it is exceptionally brutal-- but that's just how matters of the heart are, yes? Reaching that secret flower garden in order to sully it and claim it for yourself.

B.B.:

“Everyone’s favorite kouhai and little devil, B.B.! The beautiful black blossom of the Moon makes her debut, and she has a real nasty cheat skill in order to commemorate! What? There’s something dark and obviously evil mixed into my Spirit Origin? First off, I was already devilish enough, so it was really just a power boost, and also… do you really care that much? I mean, watching our enemies struggle will make any sort of mods worth it, right?”

"Anyways, do I really need to sell myself? Oh, well maybe there are a few people who aren't in the loop, and I'd hate for any potential fans to get FOMO! What do you want to know? My three sizes? My greatest fear? My one true love? Well, that's a big 'nope' to all three! I'm what some people may deem a 'rogue (and powerful) A.I', a scourge on the Moon. A 'Moon Cancer' (obviously), and any sort of digital, quasi-digital, pseudo-digital, or conceptually-digital space is basically my domain! So, you know, if you're looking for winners…"

"Anyways, you know the right choice (It's me, if you didn't realize). I'll ~ be ~ in ~ your ~ care ~! ♡"

GANESHA:

The Great Statue God. The God of Prosperity and Fortune. The Elephant-headed God of Overcoming Obstacles, Ganesha. A mighty Divine Spirit, distilled into a vessel that Ganesha himself thought was suitable- a woman who had her very fate changed on the surface of the Moon.

Vessels are chosen, and often don't volunteer, so this particular soul was rather surprised to end up a Divine Spirit. However, she's willing to step out into the world and give it 110% to represent Lord Ganesha! Do your best~!

"…eh? Seriously?!"

…This Ganesha greatly enjoys living the slow life, not having to worry about combat, danger, or fighting-- however, as a vessel for a god that also represents forward progress and overcoming obstacles, she can’t sit and bide her time forever (despite REALLY wanting to). Finding out when to rest and when to strike… perhaps that’s a lesson that both you and this god’s vessel can learn together.

[our-future-is-up-to-us-2]

I'll Think Of You

Fic number 3! And it's actually a Narcos fic @narcosfandomdiscord

Have fun with our favourite guy, aka "some guy", aka "my guy", aka "Walt Breslin" >:D

Prompt #25, Book Of Reciprocity: "Fine, I'll do it myself."

Word Count: 1.3K

Relationships: Mimi/Pablo Acosta, Walt Breslin & Pablo Acosta

Warnings: Mentioned character death, mentioned drug use (as per canon)

~ Read the fic under the cut ~

Fuck it . 

It’s a thought that Walt Breslin thinks on a daily basis. 

With Operation Leyenda well and truly over, Walt and his crew had to switch tactics, not without people like Ed Heath towering over them. 

Better yet, fucking asshole Calderoni lurks, with his helpful information at one point, and heavy insults at others. 

This team of theirs, a real ragtag bunch, can only do so much. 

Breslin inquires, one day, if his team has the strength to go on. He gives them all permission to leave: Some have better jobs than this to pursue, others are husbands, and fathers of little boys and girls. 

He gives them an exit route, a free pass outta town. 

Determination rouses inside him when none of them refuse. 

They’ll work, side by side, till the break of dawn, till the end of the day– If it means avenging Kiki Camarena, if it means bringing justice to his name! 

That’s all that matters. 

He’ll defy anyone that stands in his way. Well, as much as he can do so. 

And there comes a point where he’s the one making negotiations, compromises with a side that should be wrong. In all truth, the people he’s speaking to… They’re saner than he expected, especially for their profession. 

Before he leaves to meet them, he tells his team, “This one, I’m doing by myself.” 

He says it again, in a different way, when they don’t get the message. 

“Guys, look, I get it. I’m the leader here. But, damn that! I can only take you so far… You’re angry about it, yes, but let me go. I’ve got the information, the equipment, the leads– Now you’re angry at me. Got it. Fine, I’ll do it myself! You guys stick around, do what you can with what you know, and occupy the ground over here.” 

Because this mission is a suicide mission, basically. 

The rest of the special agents can know he’s out there, Walt Breslin’s on the case, he’s doing something , some solo mission. 

As he drives to Ojinaga, a heaviness settles in his gut. He is both free and chained, maddened and rational. 

His heart flutters when he spots a girl, tall, blonde and beautiful, standing around a house. She points upwards, and that’s when Walt is taken off-guard. 

Pablo Acosta, drug lord, cartel king, working on a roof. 

Fuck it , He thinks, once again, Whatever it takes to get him on-side. 

 

***

Pablo asks him to bring up a toolbox, and Walt Breslin can only oblige. 

They start talking about life, about change and simple things.  

There comes a point where Acosta pauses and cracks the toolbox open. He shuffles about, as though planning which tool to grab, when, in fact, there are no tools whatsoever. Just beer, bottles and bottles of it. 

It’s the American’s sign that he can relax, fortunately enough. 

“Do you drink?” He asks, a bottle outstretched in one hand. 

“Fuck, yeah, I do,” Walt replies, perhaps a little too enthusiastically, “As much as I can handle.” 

They clink bottles in acknowledgement and take long, slow sips. They relish the refreshing taste in the dry heat, the bitterness that sinks into their throats. 

“Hey, look, I can get you immunity, protection,” The DEA agent offers, “Whatever you need. As long as you cross that border with me, and tell me everything you know about Felix. Felix Gallardo. ” He clarifies, “I’m lookin’ to take him down.” 

“Why’s that? Who’s Felix to you?” 

Walt takes a swig of his beer and sighs, his eyes fixed on Acosta’s, “He killed a federal agent. Camarena, his name was. He was diligent, so I’ve heard, and he didn’t deserve what he got. So… This is to avenge him, I guess.” 

“So you’ve heard?” The other smiles, tilting his hat, “So you guess? Did you ever know him, Camarena, the agent that died?” 

As a DEA agent, he feels like he should’ve, but they weren’t in the same place, the same sector. Kiki was working for longer hours, harder than he ever could’ve… But he didn’t know the man. Not personally. He never got the time, had the connections, to find out who he really was, if he had a family, what he liked in the world… 

Pablo Acosta seems to appreciate the simple things. And if Pablo Acosta had met Kiki Camarena, maybe, pushing all the drugs and crime aside, they would have got along splendidly.

All Walt can do is shake his head, rather sadly. 

“You didn’t even know him…” Acosta tuts, as though to place blame on Walt. “And I get it, comrades, partners… You trust people who work the same way as you. I can’t do that anymore. All I can trust is Mimi,” He gestures to the girl with fondness, “Or, maybe you.” 

“You should trust me,” The DEA agent huffs, crossing his arms, “I’m trying to help you, here… As long as you help me back.” 

“I don’t know where I fit in anymore,” He segues, “There’s… A different feeling here, with the drug now, cocaine, the Colombians, fucking politicians… Everything is crazy. So, I might just settle down.” 

“Settle down across the border.” He pleads, “Help me out here.” 

Acosta stands up, drinks some beer, wanders around the roof aimlessly. Even while Breslin is angry, a part of him worries about the guy crashing and falling. 

He exhales and turns back to face the American, glad to occupy the higher ground. “I can’t help you out without knowing who you are. Don’t start… Listing bullshit things. What are you really doing here? That agent is long gone.” 

Fuck. Walt thinks, cracking his knuckles just to hear the sound. 

The thought is not fuck it , as it should normally be, but instead, total despair. A rock bottom. A weird type of guilt and defeat and admission that he absolutely hates! 

And to share it with a former drug lord? Dear god, did things really have to come to this? 

I could lie. He muses, staring at the surface below him, pondering, I could lie and cheat and steal to get him to trust me. It’s not beyond the cartels, and it’s not beyond me, is it?  

‘Don’t start listing bullshit things.’ 

Acosta seems like the type of guy to have a lie detector built into his body. 

So, Walt looks at him, squints, thanks to the sunlight, and goes for broke. 

“Three years ago, I was at home,” He begins, gripping the neck of his beer bottle, “And I was working a shift, everything’s cruisy. That’s when I get a call, for a one-eighteen, a gang-related shooting. But if it was located in the town over, why should I be called?!” 

Acosta just shrugs: A simple signal. He doesn’t know the story, so Breslin must tell it. 

“If I was called, I had to go… And I knew from that point forward that something was wrong. My brother was involved. Not just that,” A wobble emerges in his voice, “ My brother had died. Three shots to the chest, with an eight-ball of cocaine by his side.” 

Walt wipes a hand at his face. He’s vulnerable, he’s scared, and he’s not about to start crying in front of Pablo Acosta. 

He finishes his tale with his voice at a mere whisper, “So… Yeah. That’s why I’m here. ” 

When the drug lord sits down and lets out a slow exhale, he knows. The story, the truth, the emotions… They’ve all hit in just the right places. 

And Walt Breslin can be proud of that. Proud for telling the truth, proud for negotiating in a way that doesn’t involve trickery… 

Because Pablo Acosta reveals, just minutes before the DEA agent climbs down to the ground, that his brother was a junkie too. 

[deke-rivers-1957]

ECU High - Jodie's Deal

Jodie returns home after his interrogation.

"Jodie wha's got yer brow all furrowed?"

He looks up and sees Mrs. Tatum making him a plate.

"Ah saw a bad car accident. Mikey hit Mike leavin school."

She does a sign of the cross.

"Goodness! Jus how serious was it?"

"Bad. Mike went ta the hospital. Mikey's still in the holdin cell. Police done asked me what Ah've seen. So's Ah told 'em."

He shakily sits down at the table.

"We's best be sayin our prayers then. Yer friends need all the Lord's help."

"Yer right Ma."

They pray for Mike's health, mercy for Mikey and peace for Jodie.

"Ah woulda came home right away but the police done made me follow 'em down ta the station."

"Don't ya go frettin bout this no more. Ya said yer piece. If all 'em police took it down ya oughta be done."

Jodie sighs.

"Yer right, Ma."

He eats dinner and goes to bed.

"Jodie jus so ya know, Coach Wade called. He wants ya ta be in his office by 7."

Jodie groans.

"Ah got it, Ma. Thanks for tellin me. Night."

"Night, Jodie. May the Lord bless ya wit good dreams."

He sighs and settles in for the night. To his good fortune, he had a pleasant dream about having a date with a hot girl.

"Least Ah got somethin good before Coach kicks mah ass agin."

He gets through his morning routine and grabs a quick breakfast.

"Ah hope Ah don't have somethin happen ta keep me late agin, Ma."

"Ah'll be prayin on it, son. Jus like Ah been prayin for Pappy ta come home tanight."

Jodie kisses her on the cheek and gets in the truck. For a second he gets the shakes.

"Just gotta get ta school. Then ya can get yer ass kicked by Coach."

He makes the sign of the cross when he parks the truck safely. Once he's inside he heads over to Mr. Wade's office.

"Finally got here on time. I'm amazed."

Jodie just swallows.

"I heard bout what happened yesterday and Principal Gates got on my ass. So I gotta make you a deal. You help train the newcomers and I'll cut your training sessions."

Despite not wanting to admit it, Jodie feels relieved that he won't be getting scolded again.

"Who do Ah gotta train?"

"Got a sophomore in your weight class so you'll start with him now. I just got him cleared to train so he's pretty damn behind on his workout routine."

Jodie nods.

"Ah'll show 'em how ta train right, Coach."

"Good now get dressed and go to the weight room before he hurts himself."

"Got it."

He walks out of the office and into the locker room. By the time he goes to the weight room he's surprised by who he needs to train.

"Scalosis kid?!"

Toby turns around and waves.

"Hey, Jodie. The doc finally said Ah can wrestle. Ah brought mah papers ta Coach an Coach said, 'Well.... Toby. You get changed in your gym clothes and head down to the weight room. Don't go touching anything until Jodie shows up.' So Ah've been standin here waitin."

Jodie takes a breath.

"Coach told me yer pretty damn behind in yer trainin."

"Yeah. Ah can walk on the treadmill real good but Coach ain't let me use weights till now. He said he don't want me hurtin mahself if Ah lift 'em wrong."

"He's right fer it. Ya ain't gonna get all these muscles like me if yer form's all wrong. Specially when yer doin overheads. Yer form's wrong yer gonna drop a barbell right on yer head."

Toby rubs his head.

"That'd be bad. So what do ya want me doin first?"

"Here take this dumbbell."

There's a pause.

"Oh ya meant the weights. Got it."

He takes the dumbbell out of Jodie's hand.

"What ya thought Ah was callin ya a dumbbell?"

"Ah've been called worse."

Jodie pauses when he puts down his water.

"Yer a.... one a 'em slow kids?"

"Uh huh. Ah oughta be in the same class as ya. At mah old school Ah got held back twice. Gates told Pop Ah gotta have an IEP ta do better."

Jodie nods.

"And yer doin better?"

"Oh yeah. Rusty helps me out real good an Ah go ta the library ta get tutorin."

"Ok well let's get started before Coach kicks mah ass."

Toby nods as the two train. A couple days later they start to practice wrestling moves in the gym when Jodie notices something.

"Hey now who's that lil woman wit a camera?"

Toby sits up from the mat.

"Oh that's Margret. She's on the newspaper club."

"How the hell ya know that?"

Toby takes a sip of water.

"Cause she tutors me at the library when Rusty's at band practice."

"Hmm."

Jodie chuckles.

"Think ya can get me acquainted wit 'er?"

"Why? Are ya too shy ta talk wit 'er yerself?"

Jodie scoffs.

"No. Ah jus know ya don't go on up ta a girl an introduce yerself. Ya gotta get a friend of a friend ta do it."

"Ya think she'd trust me enough ta feel good bout it?"

Jodie sighs.

"Ah'll treat ya ta Whataburger if ya get it done."

Toby's stomach growls.

"Ha. Ah can't even talk bout Whataburger without ya gettin hungry."

"What? Ah'm hungry. How do Ah go bout this?"

Jodie chuckles.

"Least ya can do's ask 'er bout the camera. Ah wanna show 'er mah good side ya know what Ah mean?"

"Ah didn't know ya cared that much bout yer yearbook picture."

Jodie chuckles.

"If it means havin a lil woman like 'er hangin round."

"Ok Ah'll ask 'er."

Toby gets up and goes to talk to Margret. Jodie watches the two talk before raising an eyebrow when Margret hands Toby her camera.

"The hell happened, Toby?"

"She wanted me ta hold this cause she was gettin 'er backpack. Somethin bout needin a PDA fer notes on the wrestlin team."

Jodie shakes his head.

"She's gotta talk ta Coach bout that first. Ah mean Ah don't mind havin 'er check out the locker room, but we's both know bout Coach's rules."

"Oh she said she jus wanted pictures a us in the weight room, on the mats an a big ol group shot wit the whole team."

"Least it's somethin."

Once everything's settled, Margret starts taking pictures of the team. Then she gets to Jodie and Toby's mat.

"So Toby told me you're in the same weight class. Can you explain how that works?"

"Why course Ah can. See Coach has us all strip down so's we can get weighed."

Margret looks very disturbed.

"Yeah Coach don't want dudes like us beatin up on the freshmen cause we're too big. Clothes got weight so he wants ta make sure it's right."

She breathes a sigh of relief at Toby's clarification.

"Now Toby you're a sophomore. How is it possible for you to be in the same weight class if the other underclassmen wrestle each other?"

There's a pause. Even Jodie feels awkward about that type of question knowing the truth.

"Ah did a lotta sittin round when Ah had scalosis."

"Scalosis?"

"Yeah. Mah back was all crooked and broke for a real long time. Couldn't exercise much so Ah put on a lotta weight."

Jodie tries to hide his relief at Toby can somehow answer the question without telling her the whole truth.

"Oh you mean scoliosis. But treatments are so expensive. How were you able to afford that?"

"Pop kinda didn't. We had ta move here from Tennessee cause a somethin involvin no taxes."

Everyone around him just looks baffled. It's the type of bafflement where you're fully aware that someone is different yet you want to be polite by not mentioning it.

"So. You got treated."

"Yeah but Ah still got all the weight from it so Coach says Ah can only wrestle Jodie. Who knows maybe once Ah get in shape like Jodie it'll change."

Jodie clears his throat trying to get things back on track.

"What kinda pics do ya still need?"

"I just need a couple pictures of you and Toby pretending to wrestle. Action shots only come out blurry with this type of camera."

They nod as the two start pretending to wrestle.

"Perfect. All that's left to do is take the group lineup picture."

Jodie stands up straight.

"How's ya gonna do this?"

"Oh that won't be until your first match."

Toby stands up and grabs his water bottle.

"That's good. Ya don't gotta worry bout that till after Thanksgivin."

"Great. I'll see you both around."

Margret packs up her stuff and heads out of the gym.

"Hmm."

"What's wrong? Ah did what ya asked me ta do, Jodie."

Jodie sighs.

"Ya did. Ah'm jus figurin out how ta ask 'er out. Ah dunno how Ah'm gonna wait till the first match ta do this. Sides she don't seem all that 'mazed by me bein champ. Ah ain't smart so what do Ah got left?"

"How come ya didn't ever go ta the library ta get tutorin? Tutorin helped me get smarter. Ain't ever gonna be like most but Ah'm doin better."

That gives Jodie an idea.

"Maybe Ah oughta. Coach'll get off mah ass bout mah grades an Ah'll get a good connection wit Margret."

"Does that mean yer gonna get me Whataburger?"

Jodie chuckles.

"Anythang ya want Tobeh."

"Great!"

Tagging: @mercsandmonsters, @vintagepresley, @thetaoofzoe, @elvismylove04, @ashtag6887,

@tupelomiss, @thedaisymaisy, @richardslady121, @arrolyn1114, @theelviseffect,

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@joshuntildawn13, @briefpandatimemachine, @sillybookmarks, @tacozebra051, @cattcb, 

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@doll-elvis, @idk583838, @queencreole1958, @queenncreole, @them-rts,

@halieghhh, @notelvisbutitry, @thelonelyheart, and @theelvisprincess.

[gwynbleiddyn]

for the Rook Q's: 2, 7, 22, and 47 for little Kerros :)

from fifty questions for Rook!

for itty bitty baby boy Kerros let's go

2. How did Rook get the nickname? What do they think of it?

well i technically answered that here but i forgot to say what he thought of it SO I'LL DO THAT

Kerros likes it! it's an old, reassuring thing for him -- like when you get a special nickname from a close family friend or uncle/auntie, you feel acknowledged for your unique bond with that person that resulted in that name, and it's really nice. a little hug every time they call your name, a gentle keepsake you have no fear of losing. at least, that's how it feels coming from Varric!

the wider use of it since then sometimes throws Kerros off. he still answers to Kerros, Kesi, Kes, the things his father called him, the things his clan called him, things that were never Rook. but in a way, it's like his real name is being protected from this big scary end-of-the-world responsibility, he can just be Rook to anyone and everyone, and then 'Kerros' will never be ruined by a legacy he has yet to leave behind.

Varric is a storyteller after all. it makes sense that he knows the power of a name and its associations. maybe introducing Kerros as Rook to the Veilguard was less a force of old habit, and more an intentional device to protect him from the part of the story he hadn't written yet. i like to think of it that way, knowing how much he cares for Kerros and Rion both. a writer's gift, in part, is to preserve a subject in words far beyond the span of its lifetime.

7. Why does Rook agree to join the Veilguard?

it does feel fated that the Inquisitor hands the safety of the world to his son, as though it were a hereditary privilege in the same way the divine right of kings is often touted. but i think Kerros avoids the word 'fate' -- as far as the Lords of Fortune and Clan Severan are concerned, you make your own. it forms part of Kerros' anger towards Solas; he feels Solas' choices have taken his father's freedom to choose how his life should unwind, and that he now must spend his dying years trying to fix a mess that can't be undone.

and yeah, perhaps Kerros is oblivious to the hypocrisy in his anger, but i think most would be when it comes to facing the reality of your loved one's lifetime coming to an end in a way they don't deserve. and even more importantly, this was never something handed to Kerros. if anything, Kerros had to pry it out of his father's hands. it isn't quite daedalus granting icarus his wings, but i suppose you could draw the connection. it is an ill-fated thing, to those with sense, and the doom seems less a lurker in the deep and more a hungry dragon waiting with its jaws wide open.

but hey, good thing Kerros isn't a man of fate, right? all he cares about is that he puts the world to rights - and yes, it's partly because he wants his father to be at peace when he dies, why wouldn't it be? but he's in it for himself too. he's got to live in this world, and he sure as shit doesn't want to live in it with the gods running around.

22. Most embarrassing memory as a teenager:

thinking he was hot shit for smuggling a small crate of rum for a small gang of friends. he pilfered it from his grandad's stash, first of all -- rookie mistake, given grandpa Amrun is what one might call a well-salted sea captain -- and second of all, he was convinced his heist would land him a reputation of being cool as fuck amongst his fellow teenage delinquents.

technically it did work, but he got caught red-handed seeing as he couldn't handle his first foray into alcohol very well and wound up sick as a dog in the neighbour's garden. Cullen had to fish him out of Old Lady Sol's parched rosemary shrubs in the wee hours of the following morning, along with a very suspect bottle. Amrun was furious, if ever so slightly amused, and Kerros ended up scrubbing decks for weeks. but it also sowed the very first seeds of his eventual emergence into the Lords of Fortune a few short years later.

47. What’s Rook’s temper like?

you know, i'm not so sure 👀i don't think he's brash and hotheaded, but i do think he has a tendency to be a little snappy when he's irritated. he just kinda spits and bubbles away like an unwatched pot on the stove, but he's easy enough to calm down. like one of those little dogs that just goes rarghraghhh until you put their little jackets on or something

i think genuine anger for Kerros - usually that kind so closely intertwined with his pre-emptive grief that it's hard to discern which is which, for the record - is a lot quieter and more insidious.

[areyoudreaminof]

No Regrets in this Life: A Cassian Playlist

We're back with our good ol' Lord of Bloodshed. Cassian has had a lot of assumptions and descriptors thrown his way. Bastard, warlord, General, bastard, and himbo (my own personal favorite). But underneath his humor, you've got this very loving and empathetic man, who has a lot more emotional complexity than he gets credit for underneath that humor. So I really let myself have a lot of fun with this playlist. I branched out more sonically and lyrically. So come take a look with me behind the cut! And Listen Here!

Ares-Bloc Party

War, war, war, war I want to declare a war My fist breaks your porcelain nose There are other things my hands can do To create or to destroy Mini gods and goddesses First person singular Set it, set it, set it off

The Man-The Killers

Nothing can break, nothing can break me down Don't need no advice, I got a plan I know the direction, the lay of the land I know the score like the back of my hand Them other boys, I don't give a damn

Inhaler-Foals

So can you not go away If just for one day? Impossible, possible How do you feel now? How do you feel now in a war? War sends out for you And throw your fortune away

After Hours-The Weeknd

Thought I almost died in my dream again Fightin' for my life, I couldn't breathe again I'm fallin' in too deep Without you, I can't sleep 'Cause my heart belongs to you I'll risk it all for you I want you next to me This time, I'll never leave

Careful You-TV on the Radio

Not to say, not to say That you shouldn't share the blame There is a softness to your touch There is a wonder to your ways Don't know how I feel, what's the deal? Is it real? When's it gonna go down? Can we talk? Can we not? Well, I'm here, won't you tell me right now? And I'll care for you, oh, careful you

Bite Down: Bastille vs HAIM

You don't have to look any further I've been waiting here for you for time You don't have to look any further You're missing what is right before your eyes No one's gonna stick the pieces Together for you, together for you

HEADBOARD-Lil Ugly Mane

Caught in a fire Buried with you Off in a dream, dream, dream All I know is right now, I'm through

waves-Miguel

Don't stop, I wanna ride that wave All night, I'm gonna ride that wave Look here, I'm gon' surf in it baby Get turnt in it baby, put work in it baby Keep workin' it while I ride that wave Put it out, I'm on fire, fire That’s what I’m about, take me higher, higher, tonight (I'm gonna ride that wave) You got a body built for the beach Do you got that ocean? Body surf, don't sleep, body surf on me

Don't Wanna Fight-Alabama Shakes

What you like, what I like Why can't we both be right? Attacking, defending Until there's nothing left worth winning Your pride and my pride Don't waste my time I don't wanna fight no more

The Fire-The Roots & John Legend

There's something in your heart And it's in your eyes It's the fire, inside you Let it burn You don't say, "Good luck" You say, "Don't give up" It's the fire, inside you Let it burn

10 Lovers-The Black Keys

When I hear them use your name I get all choked up inside It's not only from the shame It's like ten different lovers died Except you're still just a mile away But there's nothing left to say Don't leave us down and out again Cause we might break instead of bend

Who-David Byrne & St. Vincent

Who’ll help the tired soldier? Far from his own hometown Carry these men and women Who get lost when the Sun goes down? Who is an honest man?

TKO-Justin Timberlake

Fair fight, knocked down, then I got over you Can't fight no more, you knock me out What am I supposed to do? Don't understand it Tell me, how could you be so low? Been swinging after the bell and after all of the whistle blows Tried to go below the belt, through my chest, perfect hit to the dome Dammit, babe

Young Men Dead-The Black Angels

And out of the black a figure forms A soldier in the sky With a drop of love Trying to set you free Run for the hills, pick up your feet and let's go We did our jobs, pick up speed now lets move The trees can't grow without the sun in their eyes And we can't live if we're too afraid to die

Good Times, Bad Times-Led Zeppelin

I know what it means to be alone I sure do wish I was at home I don't care what the neighbours say I'm gonna love you each and every day You can feel the beat within my heart Realize, sweet babe, we ain't never gonna part I feel good when I look into your eyes

taglist: @octobers-veryown, @melting-houses-of-gold, @velidewrites, @reverie-tales, @thesistersarcheron@ultadverb, @c-e-d-dreamer, @andrigyn, @foundress0fnothing, @vulpes-fennec ,@asnowfern,@mossytrashcan, @thelovelymadone, @the-lonelybarricade, @shadowriel, @separatist-apologist , @fieldofdaisiies, @stickyelectrons, @vanserrass, @panicatthenightcourt, @krem-does-stuff, @iftheshoef1tz, @damedechance, @headcanonheadcase, @cursebrkr, @andrigyn, @mossytrashcan, @thelovelymadone, @wilde-knight, @moonpatroclus, @stickyelectrons, @kataravimes-of-the-shire, @mossytrashcan, @sunshinebingo, @filthyglamdoll, @ablogofbipanic

[pynkhues]

Baby for the wip game…….

Still a little rough, and a lot more than a sentence, haha, but have a snippet from the weird cruising roleplay fic, haha.

-

“And you would do it here?” Lestat asks, lip curling just slightly as his own gaze travels from the dirt path they stand on down into the undergrowth below the sessile oaks and the beech trees, catching on the dead wood and the rowan and the spaghum moss. “In the dirt?”

“Sometimes,” Louis says, a grin finding his face when Lestat peers back at him with something between amusement and distaste on his face. He shakes his head, can’t quite swallow the laugh when he adds: “You seriously standin’ there right now trying to tell me you’ve never fucked outside before?”

But the thought sits - - somewhere. Rattles in Louis’ head like a sheet of glass loose in its windowpane, because the truth of it all is that despite christening every horizontal (and more than a few vertical) surfaces in their house and others, Louis had made a point of never taking Lestat down to the bayou in all those years in Rue Royale. It had felt important at the time, although Louis still isn’t entirely sure why it had.

Had contemplated it on occasion over the years when fantasies of Lestat had found him both in bed and out of it. Had wondered whether it had been out of a sense of obligation to protect those closeted gay men in his home city, who found sanctuary in the low hanging trees and the stench of stagnant water, chasing shadows and the sound of a belt unbuckled, for lord, hadn’t Louis been one of them once? Or out of his own insecurity that Lestat’s wandering gaze might catch on another.

Or - perhaps more truthfully - it had been simply the fact that he had swapped the shame of fucks and fumbles in beds of leaves below canopies of Spanish moss for lovemaking on Egyptian cotton, in a bed that cost more than any his father had ever owned, on a street his grandfather could never have dreamed of living on. A social ascent that bought privacy and painted the illusion of power, freedom, control in a way that had meant something to him once.

A pride that hadn’t felt quite as important when the years and the miles had wrestled the memory of the man he’d been once into submission.

“Ne sois pas ridicule,” Lestat says now, jerking Louis from his thoughts. “I have enjoyed the company of many in Mother Nature’s generous environs. In fact, in the Auvergne there were rarely places better to find yourself than between the legs of a peasant in the wheat fields, but has time not blessed us with its fineries and the fortunes to buy them? Why dirty your knees when you can cool them on marble floors instead?”

And it’s there, Louis thinks, despite himself, grin widening even as his chest tightens with something that feels alarmingly close to love, the thought that maybe Lestat would get it if he were to tell him why he never took him to the bayou. That maybe for Lestat, penniless aristocrat that he once was, getting to fuck inside a dressed up house, with both its comforts and its symbolic status, had meant something to him too. Still, dangerous territory, Louis thinks, at least for now, with them flirting with the fringes of real intimacy, so he laughs instead, the sound carrying down the dark path ahead of them.

“Take the prince out of his castle, but can’t take the castle out of the prince, huh?” he says, accent thickening even to his own ears as Lestat huffs in faux-annoyance, smile twitching at his lips. “Sorry, baby, I’ll make sure the cushions are plumped for you tonight. Call Doris right now and see to it.”

It’s enough to make Lestat roll his eyes back at him, but he sees it - - a curiosity, maybe, that click-sparks something in the air between them that leaves Louis a little warmer.

Send me a word and if it's in my WIP, I'll post a little something

[jils-things]

irene + her family lore(?)

disclaimer: i am not good at history and i've tried to read up as much as i can towards the victorian era/queen victoria's reign and even read a research paper before i typed this out... i want to the story to be accurate to the irl situation back then but i want to put my own spin to align it to my ship so there's a little freedom to how i write this - and with freedom comes guaranteed inconsistencies with the irl facts of the old times. trust me i've thought this over and over and was honestly too scared to write it because i was nervous knowing there will be something incorrect but ahh fuck it it's my story frfr aha

irene constantine

i've said this so many times but for summarization's sake, i'll say everything again:

irene was born in a much lower-class family, not much is established on her old family but at one point, she was on her own in an orphanage as her parents sent her off in hopes to give her a better lifestyle, much better than what her real family had. irene still kept her name but her surname is understandably changed due to adoption. irene has lived in the orphanage for quite sometime, perhaps in her toddler years at best. she was very sweet and outspoken. she was raised well by her "siblings" and was taught to be very well-mannered even if she can be playful. the most important thing that irene remembered in her childhood was the value of being connected with everyone regardless of their status. of course, it's expected that many of the children there did not live the most fortunate lives, but they never discriminated anyone who could be much "fortunate" than the other because in the end, the bond they all share together is far more important and if they work together, they can achieve things even if it seemed impossible.

irene kept this philosophy to herself for the rest of her life, and especially when she would later be adopted by lady constantine, her new adoptive mother.

the constantines and her childhood

a lot of these paragraphs are still uncertain to me due to my lack of good understanding in economics and history so these could easily change if i find something more preferable

for now, i imagine the constantines to be a set of stable aristocrats who live, the family line has many relatives and is able to keep the family line sustainable - but one relative family stuck out like a sore thumb - which was the fact that lady constantine is unable to bear a child even if she wanted to. she simply wanted a child to love and care for - so she was willing to go far to adopt a child just to fulfill that desire. lord constantine didn't mind the adoption, but had hoped his wife would bring over a son, but had brought in a daughter instead. had she chosen a son, the son could continue to live the family line well even if the constantines were fine already. but since they brought in a daughter, they figured that marrying her off to a wealthy man was the better idea once she's gotten older.

the daughter they adopted just so happen to be little irene from the orphanage. she was just about 7 years old, give or take.

irene was happy to finally be in a family, but she wasn't aware of how high standard the upper-class could be. just a few years after being daughter, she would soon enough be forced into being taught how to be "prim and proper" which unfortunately contrasts her bubbly and earnest personality. this puts her in a spot of discomfort where she felt less like herself as the years go by. being told how to act this and that, and not to do this and that. it was all too overwhelming for her. she was happy to have a sense of belonging finally, but if its at the cost of removing what makes irene, herself - was it really worth it?

lord constantine was never too concerned about her feelings, perhaps he still carried the grudge knowing he could've had a son if he wanted to and he pushed his anger on her to be the perfect daughter. lady constantine however was a little different, the mother was easily the most caring if not irene's personal maid. she was simply, being a "mother". it was something she wanted to be after all after not being able to successfully bear one of her own. she wanted to give her all when irene came into her life and she knew every constant struggle irene went through. she understood her true colors and validated her struggles but because of the way they live, the mother tells her to trust the process and follow what her husband forces upon her. lady constantine would usually reward her daughter's efforts by letting her be out of the house when she asked for it. the mother and daughter would even do things together, like teaching arts and craft; embroidery, stitching, learning music. going outside was something that irene felt more close to, as it always reminded her what her past life was like in the orphanage. sometimes, and she would meet a sweet gardener named emma woo.ds who would become her kind friend later down the line.

lord constantine would be upset if he saw irene acting "improper" and always knew his wife was being too kind to her - he especially did not like it when irene goes out into the village to bond with everyone she sees - perhaps he didn't want her to be "tainted" and it made her less ... appealing to potential suitors. part of him was worried about this when she gotten older. at some point, the lord would hire a mercenary named nai.b sub.edar to watch out for her as her outdoor adventures would become far more ambitious and "dangerous" as he imagined. irene would be 16-20 at this point. the mercenary ensured that they would have a very strict relationship, but irene still found a way to really become good friends with him and would let her off the hook a few times if the lord ever asked about her. "she didn't walk out today, she is sleeping as we speak", nai.b would lie, knowing fully well that irene is wandering out again.

the arranged marriage

when she turned 18-22, lord constantine would introduce irene to a man who he said would be her future husband - which was something that irene had feared for when she gotten older. she always believed that marriage was a bond of love and not of social advantage, her immediate concern was not knowing anything about the gentleman and she wanted to refuse. the marriage between her and the stranger would also guarantee a better connection of wealth from both families - exactly something that the lord had planned. even if she wanted to say no, it was not possible anymore as it has been mapped out before she even consented. the father promises that it's for the better and she'll come to love the gentleman eventually. she now only had half a year or so before the day of her union with the stranger. lady constantine wished she had better control over this situation, but she couldn't do much for her since she previously had control on who she wanted to adopt years ago and she didn't let her husband intervene with the decision, and he insisted it was only fair he gets to control what happens to irene next.

even if this is how it is now, lady constantine still felt like this wasn't right. is wealth or family more important to her?

after irene's wedding announcement, she became more distant from the family, almost as a form of rebellion to tell that she didn't want to go along with this plan. lord constantine wasn't too worried about her disappearance, and told nai.b to follow her in secret.

[lore dump part 2 coming soon]