#i’m sure 2000 other people have had this same thought but | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

buuniebaby · 11 months ago

Note

your first time with hamzah 🙈🙈

THERE’S A FIRST TIME FOR EVERYTHING. 🎀

includes: losing your virginity, awkward sex talk, very sweet sex ! 💝

word count 3.2k purr

you’re too tired for this.

you and hamzah are becoming sleep deprived, something you usually do together: come over to each others houses, watch a movie, eat food your stomach will regret in the morning. it’s been a tradition since you guys were just friends.

even now as you’re dating, it still feels.. the same. not that you’re complaining; you love having a partner who’s also a best friend to you. it just feels like there should be some sort of change, but you can’t put your finger on it.

it’s 2 in the morning now. you and hamzah have watched about 3 shitty 2000s movies, enjoying every moment of each one. your brain feels absolutely fried, and you can only imagine his is as well.

“are you a virgin?” hamzah spoke suddenly, but also casually. a little too casually. you choke on your own spit at that, face turning red with embarrassment.

“…what?” is all you can reply back. “what- why?” you say, eyebrows furrowing at him. your voice has noticeably pitched up.

“i dunno. just tell me.” hamzah says, rolling his eyes. you hate how confident and sassy he is, but you’re also sort of attracted to it.

“you’re so weird.” you practically squeal, jokingly. you grab onto a pillow as you fall back first onto the bed. “why do you even wanna know? that’s so like, random.” you ask, more genuine this time.

“i guess,” hamzah starts, but then pauses, almost as if he doesn’t know the answer himself.

“i was just kinda thinking. like, we don’t really talk about sex, ever. and we don’t have to- I don’t wanna bring it up if you’re uncomfortable. I’m just like, curious if you’d be down to talk about it.” he rambles, making up his words as he goes. you furrow your brows as he speaks, still kind of confused. you know there had to be something that started it, you just aren’t sure what.

“oh. well like,” you flush, sort of embarrassed to admit what you’re about to say. “yeah, i am.”

“a virgin?” hamzah asks, head tilting like a lost puppy.

“yes, idiot. what else would i be talking about?” you reply back sarcastically.

“you’re right, you’re right,” he banters with you. “I just- I guess I’m surprised.”

you perk back up, sitting yourself upright again.

“surprised.. that im a virgin?” you question, raising an eyebrow.

“i guess.. i dunno. I just feel like you’re like, too pretty to not have found someone who wants you like that.” he rambles. you feel a blush creep onto your cheeks again, knowing he’ll always praise you for your pretty face.

“i mean, I’ve found a lot of people who want me,” you say, rolling your eyes at the thought of a particular ex. “I’m just like, picky, I guess.” your giggling as hamzah somewhat laughs with you, but you watch as his facial expression starts to falter. you know something’s on his mind.

“do you want to?” is all he mutters. again, he keeps this quiet, casual tone that you rarely see with him.

“i mean, yeah, kinda. I just like, don’t know where to start I guess.” you answer honestly. “feels like everyone’s way more experienced than i am anyways.” hamzah turns over to you, looking in the eye. you feel him think for a second, as if he doesn’t know whether he should let his thoughts out or not.

“well, I don’t really have experience either.” he mutters back, scoping for a negative reaction from you. your eyes widen a bit, and he doesn’t know if he should take your body language negatively or positively.

“you’re a virgin too?” you ask, a more shy tone than usual.

“..yeah. well I’ve done like- stuff. just like, never had sex. never had my penis like, in there, y’know-“

“you don’t need to go into detail.” is all you have to say, talking over him.

“-but i would go all the way with you.”

that’s all you remember from that night before blacking out, yet somehow the short memory haunts your mind. it’s eating you up inside, the thought of losing your virginity after so long to him.

you’ve seen all the edits and thirst traps of him online and can admit that they’ve made you feel some type of way about him - hell, you’ve touched yourself to the idea of your boyfriend too. yet for some reason, the thought of actually having sex with him was never really a priority to you. it’s not until now you’ve understood people’s cravings for sex, but god can you feel it now.

you’re making breakfast the next morning while his hands are around your waist and all you can think of is that conversation. when you help him with editing throughout the day, leaning over his shoulder, all you can think about is him having you bent over like that in a different context. you feel like you’re in a haze almost, clouded by the thought of hamzah.

“baby?” hamzah asks, waving a hand in front of your face in an attempt to get your attention. you perk up and face him, slightly embarrassed for spacing out.

“i was just gonna ask if you wanted me to order something for lunch.” he says casually, but his face begins to fade into an expression between concerned and confused. “you okay?”

“what?!” you reply, scrambling at bit as you didn’t think he would pick up on your behavior. “im fine. what do you mean??” you question; rapidly.

“you’ve just been like, really spaced out today. i get like that, where i like dissociate sometimes when something reallyyy bad happens. so i just wanted to make sure.” he rambles a bit, genuine concern in your eyes. despite the horniness driving your body right now, you do feel a bit warmed by the way he cares for you.

“you can always talk to me if something’s up, y’know-“

“did you mean it?” you ask, staring at him blankly.

“mean… what?” he stares back at you, looking at you like you just killed a man in front of him.

“what you said last night. that you’d like- y’know..” you look down shyly, hiding in your hair as a warm blush creeps onto your face.

“that I would..?” hamzah looks at you, genuinely clueless.

“lose it to me hamzah. have sex with me. loose your virginity.” you look up at him, speaking sternly. you’re a little too pent up to take his stupidity today.

you watch as his expression changes, going from confused to something you can’t even put a name on. a mix of shocked, embarrassed, amused - but most prominently, you watch that urge crawl up into his body. you can tell in his eyes that he wants you in the same way you crave him.

“yeah.” he says, breathy. “i want that. like, now though? or like later, what are we doing-“

his words are cut off as your lips land on his. he gasps into the kiss, caught by surprise. you try and swipe your tongue against his slightly parted lips, but he pulls away before you can get it anywhere significant.

you look at him concerned after he pulls away, taking a second to breathe.

“have you like- kissed anyone before?” he asks, and you can tell he’s serious. you giggle a little.

“yes, ive kissed before.” you say, a little smile still formed on your face. “buuut..” you drag on your words to edge him on a bit.

“ive only made out with someone once, and i can already tell you’re the better kisser.” you say, slyly. he likes it when you boost his ego like this - he’s already proud of himself for pulling you, so you make him feel like some sort of greek god.

he smirks before he pulls you into another kiss, this time pressing his lips to yours a lot firmer. it’s more intense this time around, a hand cupping the side of your face, holding you in place for him as his tongue glides inside your mouth.

you kiss until you physically can’t anymore, pulling back when you need a break for air. there’s an awkward silence before he kisses you again, putting his hands on your waist sometimes. you’re taken aback a bit as he lifts you in the air.

your immediate reaction is to hook your legs onto something, hamzah just being the nearest option, of course. your legs wrap around him, straddling his hips. you arms are grabbing onto his shoulders gently. he’s strong enough to hold you without support, but you like the physical aspect of clinging onto him like a koala.

he reaches the room, fumbling with the doorknob as he struggles to lift you at the same time. he kicks the door closed softly behind him when he eventually gets in there. he drops you in the middle of the bed, body landing gracefully.

you sit yourself up into a more comfortable position, and hamzah sits himself right next to you. it’s here when you realize how comfortable you are around him, even if you’re about to reach a life milestone you can never take back with him.

but fuck, you’re never gonna be able to take this back. the anxiety crawls back up into your brain for a second, but the feeling of hamzah’s hand on your thigh relaxes you. a single look into his eyes and you’re already reassuring yourself again. you’re not gonna want to take this back, because god, you love this boy.

“have you ever-“ hamzah pauses mid sentence, stuttering. he does this when he doesn’t know what words to use; it’s one of his mannerisms that you’ve picked up a little yourself over time. “like, felt anyone up? or like- dry hump them, I guess.” he says. you feel him cringe a bit at his own words - he gets embarrassed easily.

“not really,” you say. a smirk creeps onto your face as you have an idea. “but you could show me how.”

hamzah’s eyes widen a bit as his hand moves from your thigh to your waist. he picks you up again like it’s nothing, sitting you down on his lap. his hands massage your waist, moving up briefly past your chest. he runs at your collarbone for a minute, staring at your clothed breasts.

“can i take this off?” he asks in a low voice, toying with the fabric at your shoulders. you bite your lip as you give him a nod, and before you know it whatever garment was covering you before is gone.

“fuckkk,” is all hamzah lets out before a hand is cupping your chest, squeezing at your soft and fleshy skin. instinctively, you push your chest into his hands. you let out a soft noise as he rolls one of your nipples between his fingers.

he’s fully hard now, and you can feel it straining against you. you can tell he’s trying to keep his hips still, not wanting to get worked up too fast.

his hands leave one side of your chest as his mouth attaches to your other nipple. you can’t help but moan at the feeling of him suckling at it. he pulls of for a second, and you can feel his hands fumbling with the fabric of your bottoms for a second.

“take this off for me?” he pleads in a sweet tone, and you can tell he’s starting to get needy. you comply, of course, leaving you in just your underwear. you don’t want to be the only one undressed though, so you shimmy his pants down a bit and get his shirt off too.

you’re left in both just underwear - a weird feeling. there’s not a lot of fabric separating your crotch and hamzah’s, so when he bucks his hips up into yours it feels good. he ducks down to kiss you again, chest pressing to yours, and god, you feel like you’re in heaven. there’s heat burning through your body as your bare skin touched his.

his hands are on your hips as you grind against him, the thin material of his boxers straining against his cock. he reaches down to rub you through your underwear, eliciting a moan as you hide his head in your shoulder.

he stops your grinding for a second, a hand trailing up your thigh. he uses it to spread your legs wide, causing you to make a small noise. he pulls your panties to the side, showing off what he’s wanted all this time.

he’s already settling lower, head balance with your hips, and now you’re nervous. it’s your first time being touched like this - probably his too, and it’s scary. you close your eyes when you feel him plant a kiss on your hip, teasing you. he continues to kiss around, even guiding a hand back up to play with your chest, but it’s not enough.

“please,” you whimper, begging for more stimulation. hamzah takes it as a sign you’re ready, and before you know it, you’re squirming again.

he presses just a single finger inside you, scoping how much you’re able to take. your stomach flips as you feel him spread you open. he adds another finger once the first one is in knuckle deep, then begins to curl them inside of you. you whimper at the feeling as his fingers excel in speed, working you open.

“hamzah- fuck.” you whine, letting out an especially sharp gasp at the feeling of his fingers hitting that spot.

“yeah?” he asks, playfully, curling his fingers to hit the same spot. your pelvis thrusts up at the movement, only motivating him to go further. his hands are so fucking big and he’s so strong when he thrusts his fingers up into you. it burns in the best way possible.

“ah- hamzah!” you squeal, squirming around. you whine when you feel him pull away from him; you were so, so close to finishing. you look up at him and whimper, a sad expression plastered across your face.

“didn’t want you to cum yet,” hamzah mutters under his breath. “not done with you.”

you flush red, his words washing over your body in a hot wave. suddenly hamzah is moving, pulling down his boxers, and god his dick is big. you can’t help but whine at how badly you want it inside you.

“so noisy.” he mumbles, lining his cock up with your folds and sliding the tip between them. you only whine more at his teasing.

“hamzahh,” you complain, eager for him to stop teasing you and just put it in.

“mhm?” he replies, edging you on. he strokes himself a bit, acts as if he’s going to put it in, but then doesn’t. he knows what he’s doing and you hate it. “need something, baby?”

he’s so mean, making you beg.

“I need it so bad, hamzah, pleeasee-“ you beg, desperate. you don’t care how humiliating it is now, you need him.

“need what, baby?” he asks, obviously only to get a reaction out of you. you sigh, but you know what you need to do.

“fuck me, hamzah. i need you - your cock.” you beg, no - demand, firmly.

hamzah doesn’t stall once he’s gotten what he wants. he’s done with the teasing, pressing his tip into you. you let out a shaky moan - it hurts a little when he slides in, like ripping off a bandaid.

“hamzah- hurts.” is all the words you can get out. his hips still inside of you, waiting for you to take a breath before he continues.

“it’s okay baby. gonna feel better once I’m all the way in.” he mutters, caressing your cheek with the hand that isn’t holding him up. he wasn’t lying - it’s painful as he slides himself into you, stretching you out, but once your hip-to-hip with him there’s a comfortable peace to the feeling.

you two lay in that position for a minute, feeling the warmth of connection between your bodies. it’s a soft, loving touch - you feel safe in his arms.

“s’okay if i move now?” he whispers to you, keeping a gentle tone. at the end of the day, he’s here to take care of you.

“yeah. thank you.” you say, genuinely grateful for his patience. you remind yourself that it’s his first time doing this too; you’re not alone in your anxiety.

you clutch onto his shoulders as he nearly pulls out, cock sliding out of you to the tip, then slams back into you.

“h-hamzah!” you whimper, clawing your nails at his back. he keeps a similar pace, thrusting into you deep. even hamzah makes a small noise at the feeling of being inside you, hips stuttering against yours. the sound of skin slapping together and breathy moans fills the room.

you wrap your arms and legs around hamzah as he continues to thrust into you, clinging to him.

“so pretty.” he says, looking down at you. “there’s a reason- fuck- i wanted to fuck you in missionary. pretty face.” he stutters, moving a hand to caress your face. you can’t say anything else but whimper at him, overstimulated from a combination of his thrusts and his words.

you feel a tight feeling build in your stomach, almost like a coil nearing its breaking point. you clench around him, legs beginning to shake.

“aah- hamzah! fuck-“ you practically scream, rolling your hips up into his one last time before you orgasm. he just stares at you, slowing the roll of his own hips, in awe.

you notice as his pace slows after you catch your breath, looking up at him almost disappointed.

“what’re you doing?” you mumble, voice worn out.

“you finished, i don’t wanna-“ he begins to ramble, but you cut him off.

“keep going.” you say firmly.

“huh?”

“want you to cum too.” you say, voice still soft and tired. you roll your hips up into him, still sensitive. he nods, pushing back into you.

he continues to thrust into you rougher and rougher until his hips are slapping against yours with every thrust. every little noise you make turns him on more, until finally, he forces himself to pull out of you.

he strokes himself on top of you, a string of cum landing on your stomach. he’s panting as he finishes all over you, painting your stomach white. you smile at the scene, enjoying the was he’s made you his little art piece.

he collapses next to you, laying on his back, catching his breath.

“glad i waited.” you mumble. he turns over to you, looking into your eyes.

“waited for what?” he asks, tiredly tilting his head.

“like, to have sex. m’glad I waited until you.” you mumble, tiredness apparent in your voice. hamzah thinks his heart melts a little at your words.

he grabs a tissue off of his bedside table and wipes the cum off of you so that he can pull you into his arms, dragging the covers over your body.

“i’m glad i waited for you too.”

#hamzah x reader #hamzah x y/n #hamzahthefantastic x reader #hamzah smut #hamzahsmut

624 notes · View notes

okayrudemuch · 6 days ago

Text

𝐴𝑙𝑙 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝐼 𝑑𝑖𝑑𝑛'𝑡 𝑤𝑎𝑛t 💋

Roomates (Quaterback) Abby x Fem!Reader (who is an early 2000's y2k baddie)

Chapter 1 - I really hate you

Chapter 2 - Whatever I do, it's always wrong

Chapter 3 - You can shove it

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Chapter 2 - Whatever I do, it´s always wrong

contains: roommates; arguments; modern AU!; maybe some grammar mistakes, english is not my first language; alcohol; alcohol consumerism; mentions of sexual harassment and sexual threats

Trigger Warning (TW): Mentions of sexual harassment and sexual threats.

word count: 2,8k

The university’s party basement is packed to the brim. Bodies are pressed together, people are moving to the beat on the dancefloor, and the bass is shaking the walls. Beer pong and rage cage tables have been set up by the football team, and the bar is cranking out beers nonstop. Colored lights flicker through the room from ceiling-mounted spotlights, and beer crates and red solo cups are everywhere. A guy from an upperclass year has taken over the DJ booth, proudly set up under a blue and white “Silver Lake Falcons” banner. They just snagged their first win of the season tonight.

You’re standing at the edge of the dancefloor with Dina, both of you holding red plastic cups filled with something unidentifiable but definitely strong, and neither of you are even close to sober. You’re laughing at something Dina said when a tattooed arm sneakes around your best friend’s waist.

“Hey,” a brunette grins at you before kissing Dina on the top of her head.

“Hey, Ellie,” you grin back and give her a quick hug. Dina and Ellie haven’t been together for long, but they’re so perfect for each other it feels like they’ve always been a couple.

“Congrats on the win,” you add and take another sip of your drink, vodka mixed with who-knows-what.

“Thanks, thanks,” Ellie says, fake-bowing dramatically. “But we never would've done it without Abby. They had us good through the first half, but our quarterback saved our asses like always.”

“Did I hear my name?” your roommate’s warm voice cuts in. Abby appears behind Ellie and gives Dina a quick hug, as if she hadn’t seen her yet tonight either. She throws an arm around Ellie’s shoulder but gives you only a quick once-over, her eyes flick down to your outfit with a slightly judgmental look.

After last night’s chaos, you’d gone for something simple tonight: a pink rhinestone crop top that hugs all the right places, low-rise jeans that cling to your hips and ass but flare a bit at the legs. You ditched the heels for comfy sneakers, and your jewelry and belly button piercing glint in the colored lights. You hadn’t seen Abby since locking yourself in the bathroom. After scrubbing away the night before, drying and styling your hair, you’d left the bathroom to do your makeup, and she was already gone. Probably off helping set up this party. Not that you care what she does with her time.

Now you just roll your eyes at the sight of her, and the couple standing with you definitely notices.

“Still in your cold war?” Dina giggles.

“I’m telling you,” Ellie adds, “either you two are gonna throw punches before the semester ends or you’re gonna fuck.”

“I’ll personally make sure it’s the first one,” Abby mutters.

You cross your arms and do your best not to give the blonde girl another look, which proves harder than you’d like. Her hair’s down tonight, and it honestly looks amazing. Way better than that dumb braid she always wears. You’re not sure if you’re imagining it, but you’re almost certain she unbuttoned another button on her black shirt. You’ve got a nearly indecent view of her collarbone and, if you breathe in too deep, you can smell her perfume. The same one that already fried your brain back in your dorm.

You mentally slap yourself and shake your head to chase off the thoughts.

“Anyone feel like playing beer pong?” you ask, desperate to look at anything other than Abby’s chest. You nod toward an empty table nearby.

“Why not,” Dina shrugs and downs the rest of her drink before disappearing with Ellie to grab four fresh beers. You and Abby head for the table. As if it were an unspoken rule, the two of you automatically take opposite sides, clearly not on the same team.

You and Dina pair up while Ellie stays with Abby. You’ve never been good at beer pong, and Dina’s definitely too drunk to help make up for it. Abby and Ellie wipe the floor with you. It’s actually kind of embarrassing. When you finally land a shot, you and Dina freak out so hard you’re clinging to each other and bouncing in circles. Ellie laughs. Abby just raises a brow. You catch her judging stare and flip her off while still half-hugging Dina. You’ve missed so many shots it feels like you're ten drinks ahead of the football girls, your tolerance is hanging by a thread.

You ask for a rematch after the first round, where at least you landed two of their cups, but that goes just as badly.

“Okay, I’m done,” you laugh as Abby and Ellie crush you both again.

“Good game,” Ellie grins and runs a hand through her short hair before giving you a handshake. Then she turns to Dina but instead of a handshake, she pulls her in for a kiss.

You smile at the sight, but Abby’s voice grabs your attention again.

“Good game,” she says, holding out her hand too. You’re so thrown by the gesture, you forget to take it at first, but when you do, it feels like the rest of the party disappears for a second. She’s standing close, closer than she usually does, even though you share a room. Her hair falls over her shoulders, and a few damp strands stick to her forehead from the heat in the room. She’s taller than you, you notice again.

“Good game,” you finally say back, annoyed that your voice comes out a little shaky. You blame the alcohol. Abby’s hand is warm, a little rough, and so big that yours looks embarrassingly small inside it. You can see her veins, and she holds your hand way longer than necessary while staring you dead in the eyes. She’s not smiling, but you swear your heart actually stops for a second before she finally lets go and shoves her hands into her pockets.

“Oh my God!” Dina suddenly shrieks, breaking the tension, and rushes to grab you.

“They’re playing Super Bass!” she yells in your ear, and before you know it, you’re on the dancefloor. You catch the beat just in time and start singing along with Dina (if you can even call it singing). “This one is for the boys with the boomin' system!” And then, nothing can stop you.

For the next few minutes, Dina has her face in your ass and is happily making it rain imaginary money while the booze kills any last trace of shame. You spot Ellie and Abby out of the corner of your eye. Ellie’s laughing and filming you, while Abby looks like someone just told her she wasn’t at a college party but surrounded by lunatics. But she doesn’t look away. You definitely notice that.

The DJ keeps the 2000s vibe going, mixing one club banger into the next while you and Dina lose yourselves on the dancefloor. Eventually, you settle into more normal dancing, though you can’t deny you’re swinging your hips a little better than most people in the basement. Your tight jeans aren’t hiding anything, and you can feel people watching you, including your roommate, still standing on the side oft he dance flore. Alone now, since Ellie apparently left her.

Your drunk brain doesn’t get why she’s watching you. It doesn’t make sense. But even without logic, you start moving a little more deliberately. A little deeper, a little dirtier. Not for her, you tell yourself. Never for her. But you don’t break her gaze. Everything else fades, it’s just the beat, your hands in your hair, and Abby’s eyes locked on your body.

Somewhere behind you, Dina’s still dancing, bumping into you now and then, but your mind is elsewhere. Until she suddenly stumbles into your back. You snap out of it and spin around.

“Back off!” you hear Dina shout, and now you see why she bumped into you, some guy is trying to put his hands on her hips.

“Get off me, dude,” she snaps, shoving him. “What? I can’t even dance with you?” the guy slurs. He doesn’t look much older than you or Dina, but mentally he’s probably still in diapers.

“She said no,” you bark, yanking Dina away and shoving her behind you.

“What’s your problem?” he slurs again. “Can’t even have a little fun anymore.”

“Fun?” you snap, your voice climbing two octaves. “What you’re doing isn’t fun, it’s sexual harassment.” You jab a manicured finger at his chest when he steps forward again, but he’s twice your size, the shove barely moves him.

“Jesus, chicks are so sensitive these days. Can’t do anything anymore.”

You’re about to lose it.

“No,” you growl, voice shaking with rage. “Without consent, you really can’t. And every guy with more than two brain cells knows that. You disgusting piece of shit.”

You feel Dina clutch your shoulders from behind, either to steady herself or to stop you from ripping this creep’s balls off.

“What did you just say to me?” he asks, raising a brow and stepping closer. You lift your chin, refusing to look away. You won’t shrink for someone like him.

“I’ll show you what I do to bitches like you without consent,” he growls.

Your eyes go wide in shock, and that’s when someone steps between you and him.

A broad back, black shirt soaked with sweat, a full head taller than you. Abby.

She grabs him by the collar and pulls him down to her level.

“You’ve got a few seconds to think real hard about what you just said,” she growls into his ear, low enough that the music nearly drowns her out. “Then you’re gonna apologize. And don’t even think I won’t report this. You know what you missed, asshole? Your first ‘target’,” she nods toward Dina, peeking out from behind you, “is head of the student council. You’re in deep shit, Michael.”

You see the guy’s face drop, like he didn’t expect Abby to know his name. His eyes flick between you, Dina, and Abby, and you swear you see panic. Classic. These guys think they’re untouchable, then panic or deny it when it blows up.

“Sorry,” he mutters. Abby isn’t impressed. She yanks him closer again, her bicep flexing hard under the fabric of her shirt. Her face, though, is cold as ice. Her eyes alone could end him.

“I don’t think we heard you,” she mutters.

“Sorry,” he says louder this time.

“Now fuck off,” she snaps and shoves him back before wiping her hand off on her jeans like touching him physically disgusted her. “Don’t let me see you at this party again.”

You’ve never seen someone disappear so fast. Abby watches him go, jaw tight, before turning back to you and Dina.

“You guys okay?” she asks, and now you can hear the concern in her voice. But you just stare at her.

The shock and the alcohol are coursing through you. You ball your fists. The fact that she thought you couldn’t handle it makes your chest burn.

“I had it under control,” you mutter over the music, ignoring her question.

“What?” Abby asks, frowning.

“The situation. I had it under control,” you repeat, glaring at her. Abby laughs, but it’s hollow and cuts deep.

“Yeah, I saw that,” she says sarcastically, crossing her arms, and you try your best to ignore how tight her shirt is in all the right places.

“You didn’t have anything under control,” she continues. “That guy looked ready to get physical.”

You dig your nails into your palms. “You could’ve just let me handle it,” you hiss, and now Abby’s losing her patience too.

“And just stand there watching him threaten you? Are you out of your mind?” she snaps. “What was I supposed to do, watch from the sidelines like everyone else?”

“Yes, for example!” you snap back, because you can’t think of anything better.

“A simple thank-you would’ve been enough,” she growls, breathless.

You hold her gaze, chest heaving.

“Fuck you,” you spit, and storm off toward the bathrooms just as Ellie returns. Dina throws herself into her arms and explains everything. Ellie’s eyes go wide, then guilty. She asks if Dina is okay, then if you’re okay.

“I’m fine,” Dina says, then adds that it probably shook you more.

Ellie curses. “Damn it. I should’ve just waited to pee… stupid long-ass line…” She starts tearing Michael apart verbally and scanning the crowd. Dina grabs her hand and tells her Abby handled it, which pulls Ellie’s attention to her.

“You okay?” Ellie asks Abby.

But Abby just shakes her head, eyes still on the spot where you disappeared.

“Whatever I do, it’s always wrong with that girl.”

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

a/n: oppsi looks like someone owns abby an apology (you lol)

taglist: @vangoes

#abby anderson #abby the last of us #abby tlou #the last of us #tlou #abby anderson tlou2 #abby x reader #abby x you #tlou2 #abby anderson x reader #abigail anderson

43 notes · View notes

mylittlediarys-stuff · 5 months ago

Text

Bite Back Part 11

It’s a Sunday morning after the party, and the trio are eating at a local Denny's.

“So, how was your first high school party?” Francesca asked, taking a bite of her waffles.

“Umm… it was surprisingly good, I guess?” Amaka thought about the experience for a moment. She’d spent here time drinking alcohol, testing how much it would take to get drunk, and spent the rest of the night watching people do stupid stuff for entertainment. “I’d rate it a solid 5 out of 10.”

“Five? Why so low?” Ram asked.

“Not enough hot guys to look at,” Amaka said before realizing what she’d just admitted. “Forget I said that.”

If she weren’t darker than chocolate, she’d swear her face had turned red.

“You should say more stuff like that. You’ll make way more friends,” Ram said.

“Maybe even a boyfriend,” Francesca added.

Something about their teasing softened Amaka’s expression. She wasn’t used to people saying nice things about her (other than Alfred).

“Anyway, you drank so much, but you don’t even have a hangover?” Francesca asked.

“Yeah, I was wondering the same thing. Maybe I have a high tolerance or something. Plus, by the fourth drink, I’m pretty sure it was watered down, or someone started adding juice to it.”

She noticed both her friends had mild hangovers, though they seemed better by the time they made it to Denny’s.

“Actually, Francesca, whose car were you driving? Do you even have a license?”

“Nah, I drive without a license. The car’s my dad’s—he doesn’t care unless I get caught, and I doubt that’ll happen. I’ll be 16 in a few months, so it doesn’t even matter,” Francesca said casually.

The words made Amaka choke on her pancakes.

She’s driving illegally! No wonder her turns and stops were so rough.

She wanted to tell her friend how irresponsible that was, but she couldn’t exactly judge. She was literally a tenth-grader who had 20 drinks last night. She was only 15.

Somehow, the group ended up at an old thrift shop. Amaka didn’t feel like going home yet, and the other two didn’t want to head back to their dorms.

“Miss Wayne, have you even been in one of these?” Francesca teased. “Or do you buy all your stuff at Gucci?”

“I prefer Dior or Chanel, and yes, I’ve been to thrift shops. I used to go all the time.”

Ram and Francesca busied themselves looking for outfits for a party they planned to attend next week. Meanwhile, Amaka wandered around, taking in the store.

It smells like death in here.

Thrift shops always had that musty, unidentifiable smell, like someone had died, and no one cared enough to get rid of the body. Despite hating the stench, it brought back memories—good ones. Memories from before she became Amaka Wayne. Back when she couldn’t afford Dior boots.

This smell kind of puts me at peace.

Instead of browsing clothes, Amaka explored the old household appliances and outdated tech.

These computers don’t even look that bad.

Most of the tech seemed to be from late 90s from the early 2000s.

An idea sparked in her mind.

What could I build with this?

Building her own tech was something she’d always been interested in. As a kid, she used to tell herself she’d become the next Tony Stark.

If it works out, I could show Bruce. Maybe he’d be impressed.

Amaka knew she had a bad habit of craving her family’s approval. Ever since she joined them, she’d done everything to impress them—winning awards, getting straight As—but deep down, she wondered if there would ever be space for her in their hearts.

“How was the sleepover, Miss Amaka?” Alfred greeted her when she finally got home.

She’d returned later than expected, just three hours shy of dinner. She and her friends had spent far more time at the thrift shop than planned.

“It was actually pretty nice. Thank you for asking.” She took the bags from Alfred’s hands. The man was too old to be doing manual labor. “But it was quite loud. Where is everyone?”

“They’re in the clock tower for an important meeting. Apparently, there’s a mission tonight,” Alfred said. “Would you like a cup of tea or something to eat?”

“No, thank you. I’ll eat during dinner.”

An important mission?

Amaka envied her siblings. It had taken her only three days to figure out that the Waynes had... unusual nighttime activities. When she confronted them about it, they didn’t even acknowledge her discovery.

Though she never admitted it, she hoped Bruce would train her like the others. It never happened. She hadn’t even stepped foot in the clock tower. She once overheard a convection with Bruce and one of brother, Dick Bruce told him how the girl was strong but slow at the same time, they didn’t need an dead weight on the team. Dick agreed and mention t her father that she wasn’t hero material like the rest of them. Simply they believe she didn’t have what they need.

But why would they care about me? Why even bring me here? I’m just a charity case, aren’t I?

notes:

Sorry for not updating for a while but I've been busy with school and applying for colleges. In the next few chapters, we'll see some spider action no more pity party for our girl. Thank you for reading :)

tag list:

@mariadvorak @mynameisnotlaura @azure-drag0ness

#batsis x batfam #batsis #spidersona #into the spider verse #bruce wayne x daughter!reader #alfred pennyworth #bruce wayne #spider oc #batfamily x batsis!reader #damian wayne

53 notes · View notes

karmacharmeleon18 · 7 days ago

Note

I've seen you talk about Kevin and other things (I totally agree, and I love your analysis). I'd like to know what you think about Jeremy and your analysis of him and Jean (I love them).

By the way, I get the impression that Leo and Kevin are a "parallel" in terms of men that Jean and Jeremy will overcome to be together. Leo sold Jeremy for a car (a means of transporting him wherever he wants, something for his freedom). We can understand that Kevin "sold" (or rather, sacrificed) Jean to gain his freedom as well. It wasn't a sellout per se, but yes, I think there's a parallel here.

Jeremy and Jean have been betrayed by people they loved. And yet, they've continued to acquiesce, to a certain extent, in their continued mistreatment. Kevin would undoubtedly "sell" Jean again to escape as well (even if the fandom doesn't want to see it).

What are your thoughts on this?

I think that, at the same time that Jeremy tells Leo to fuck off, Jean will tell Kevin to fuck off (I don't think these two will still be in touch when this is all over, I'm pretty sure of it).

Omg I’m so sorry I didn’t answer sooner but I didn’t get a notification 😭 now I’m logged on my laptop and making my way through all the stuff the app didn’t show me and this is 5 DAYS OLD??????? I’m so sorry and thank you for your patience!

I’m going to split this into sections because my brain feels fried tonight and I need some order lol

Jeremy

Jeremy Knox (Moreu🤞🏾) my beloved ❤

I adore Jeremy, I would kill for Jeremy, I would die for Jeremy, I would live for Jeremy (I am secretly Jean Moreau)

But! I don't talk much about him because there's just so. much. we. don't. know. He is so sunny and yet so closed-off, his family is so big, so complicated

What do you mean we don't even know what Joshua's text said?

What do mean we don’t even know when his parents got divorced exactly and his family started unraveling?

What do you mean all the sex scenes are fade-to-black and barely described because Jeremy might be disassociating the whole time?

What do you mean he might be suicidal but we only got one throwaway half-sentence about it?

Figuring out one Jeremy Knox is hard as shit

So for the most part, I just go along with Jean's opinion of him lol the more their relationship develops, the more they interact, the more I see Jeremy

And not because Jeremy only exists as part of JereJean, but because Jeremy is just so inscrutable on his own

So I collect every little tidbit, every little clue, every morsel like a little raccoon from Jean's POV (which includes Cody's and Cat's and Laila's words and opinions on Jeremy) to try and figure him out

Like Cody saying that you did not want to cross freshman (on drugs) Jeremy

Was it because he was on drugs? Or was Jeremy always a bit of an asshole, and the drugs just accentuated that?

Realistically, Jeremy grew up as a rich white boy in 2000s White Supremacy Land (🦅🦅🦅). It makes sense that even before the drugs, he was probably the classic stereotype of a rich kid: arrogant, carefree, fucking around (literally) and finding out without a care in the world because he knew he always had a comfortable cushion to fall back on if things went sideways

We don’t know exactly when Mathilda married into the Wilshire family, but I assume Jeremy was in middle school? Start of high school? But even before that, Mathilda is a doctor, and considering how snobbish she is, she probably comes from a good upper-middle class if not rich rich family herself, her mother was a popular actress (though that can mean everything and nothing, because in the past being a famous female lead wasn't necessarily enough to make you super rich)

(It would be so interesting to see what compelled her to marry a military man and have 5 kids with him… a bout of teenage rebellion? Or were they high school sweethearts and then he decided to join the Army? Or maybe she does not come from money, actually, and only after she got a taste of what life with money could be like she decided to move on from him)

As a teen Jeremy wasn’t particularly guarded with his sexuality, to the point that most people in high school knew he was gay in early 2000s USA. Was it because he knew the power of the Wilshire family? That one donation would make any scandal go away? That no one would dare lay a hand against him, no matter how strong their bigotry?

Teen Jeremy clung to the Knox name, to the idea of their family, but he still undoubtedly benefited from being associated with the Wilshires. And still does, considering it was only thanks to a 7 figure donation to USC that part of the banquet scandal was covered up, ensuring that he could still be a Trojan, which led up to the story as it is today, with him being the captain of the team

Jeremy has a lot of privilege. And it comes at a very high price: his freedom

This is what drives me insane about Jeremy and Jean, outwardly they couldn’t be more different as people, and yet their circumstances and their darkest thoughts about themselves are so similar

They are so similar afhabkadjsbfasj

Really cute and fitting art by @bananakeiky that encapsulates JereJean, their very different personalities and dispositions and yet very similar views of themselves:

I love these two oblivious idiots so so so soooo much 😭🥹

I’m convinced that Jeremy is the best possible person for Jean. And Jean is the best possible person for Jeremy.

Cat, Laila, the floozies, Rhemann are all great people for Jeremy and Jean

But Jeremy and Jean can understand each other in a way no one else can

In Jeremy, Jean sees someone who went through neglect, trauma, grief and still came out of it so openly, undeniably, proudly kind

In Jean, Jeremy found someone that will not flinch away from the darkest parts of him, that will understand and reciprocate that kindness in a way no one else can

(Jean will treat you so right, Jeremy, just you wait)

Jeremy’s “sex addiction”

In a previous pots I mentioned how Jeremy uses hookups as a substitute for drugs: Jeremy has a personality that is prone to addictions and even before the drugs, he enjoyed hookups as a teenager; then his attention was almost fully taken up by the pills and the cocaine, and once that was removed, back he went to old habits, only worse

So, so, so much worse

Because if before sex was fun, now it’s a way for Jeremy to hurt himself

imo Jeremy is not addicted to sex because of the pleasure

(and atp I don’t even know if most people would consider it a sex addiction at all then? but bear with me)

Jeremy enjoys casual sex because his hookups treat him in the exact way he believes he deserves to be treated

Jeremy believes he deserves to be treated like shit

And sure, his family also treats him like shit, but that’s only half of the equation

The other half is that with his hookups Jeremy gets to feel useful, he gets to feel like he has a purpose, a positive impact on someone else on an intimate level

(I think this is why Nora called him a service top, he believes he can’t be anything else, he can’t take pleasure, he only deserves to give it)

The Wilshires consider him good for nothing, but for his hookups he’s good at one thing at least

(he’s still not good enough to be treated kindly, to be romanced, to be loved, and that’s ok because he doesn’t deserve that anyway, right?)

His hookups always happen after moments of emotional turmoil for Jeremy, and they’re all fade-to-black

This might just be because Nora doesn’t care to describe sex that isn’t JereJean… but it might also be because Jeremy straight up disassociates the whole time??????

And maybe THAT is what he’s addicted to??????

Before: sex is fun!

Now: when I have sex, only the other person matters, I can stop thinking, I can stop existing as Jeremy Knox

Cocaine can make you feel unstoppable, invincible, and for a teenager that feels like he’ll never be enough for his parents, that is incredibly addicting

But for current Jeremy? The Jeremy that feels responsible for his little brother’s death? He doesn’t deserve to feel unstoppable and invincible, he deserves to feel like nothing, like he doesn’t even exist

The disassociation is the addiction

(of course this is mostly speculation, because Jeremy is just too inscrutable to me 😕)

I would love, absolutely LOVE for Jeremy to tell Leo (and Faser, and every other hookup) to fuck off and rot, you piece of shit. I would love a good verbal evisceration and maybe a right hook 👊💥

But do I expect it? Not really 😂

Because for Jeremy it’s just so important to not be that type of person

It’s like the Trojans never getting a red card in 4 years and then headcanoning that they get one to protect Jean, you know?

The Trojans just don’t want to be that type of team

And while I believe that some of the Trojans behave this way out of self-righteousness, it’s not the case for Jeremy

In the beginning, Jeremy’s behavior came from an unhealthy place, his belief that being the perfect captain and sportsmanlike athlete is the only thing that can make up for the fact that he is Jeremy

But now, I think Jeremy truly appreciates the effect that good sportsmanship can have on people, the type of example he is setting for younger athletes, for queer athletes: you can be one of the best without having to resort to violence, to cheap shots; people will hate you and put you down but you will never stay down, and the people that count will support and admire you

Jeremy has discovered kindness and he’s never going back

Jeremy is not the type of person to treat others unkindly not because he is perfect, not because he is uwu my little blorbo too pure for this world

But because he very much doesn’t want to be that type of person

It’s so important for him that he is not.

So I have to put all my wishes of glorious, violent vindication aside and respect that this is Jeremy, you know?

Maybe Nora will surprise us, maybe she will give us a Jeremy spitting venom at his tormentors and punching an asshole or two in the face

But if she doesn’t, that’s ok, that makes sense

Learning to stand up for yourself doesn't necessarily mean learning to be less kind

Kevin and Leo might be parallels in the way Jean and Jeremy simply walk away from them in the end (together, holding hands)

Kevin

I know some people in the fandom see Kevin as some sort of super-ally-mastermind but I don’t think he could have ever predicted the bond Jean and Jeremy formed. Kevin just saw a kind man nicknamed Captain Sunshine and decided that if someone had a chance to take in a stray Raven and turn him into a human, it was him. The fact that Jeremy is gay and the Trojans the quuerest college team in the country is not a coincidence, I do think Kevin was looking out for Jean in some way, but there’s no way Kevin could have predicted JereJean. Kevin barely sees Jean as a person. He sees him as a Raven, only worse, because other Ravens were assets, while Jean was property and treated as such. Kevin saw Jean being treated like an animal, year after year, and saw the fight slowly bleed out of him, year after year

I don’t think he started seeing Jean as a full-fledged person until he saw him in California. And not because Kevin is as evil as Riko. But simply because Kevin witnessed almost all traces of humanity being stripped from Jean

In general, this is one of Kevin’s problems in my opinion: because of his upbringing and trauma, Kevin sees those around him as athletes first, them being people is secondary

Which is why he ignored all the abuse happening in the Nest, not only the cruelty directed at Jean. The Ravens were dominating as athletes, and that’s all Kevin cared about. And he’s the same with the Foxes, they matter to him as athletes, not as people

I’m gonna borrow something I wrote in my first Kevin analysis:

“But where Kevin is hellbent on making everyone around him miserable, because his whole life he’s been convinced that greatness is born from misery, Neil wants to make everyone around him better for the sake of being better.

Better Exy players, but better people, too. Neil understands you can’t have one without the other. But Kevin is so single-mindedly focused on Exy that he doesn’t care about the people, he only cares about the athletes.”

So even removed from the context of the Nest/cult/abuse, Kevin has a problem relating with other people as people

He is aware that they are people, it just doesn’t matter to him

But with Jean, I’m not sure he thought of him as a person for a long time

Strip a Fox of the athlete, and you’ll find a damaged person

Strip Jean of the athlete, and you’ll find a beaten animal

(I’m not saying it’s Kevin’s fault, that Kevin is the antichrist or Riko’s “other half”, I’m saying that Kevin was abused by a cult and his vision of life and humanity was warped to such a dramatic extent that he genuinely struggles with making human connections, and it’s the same issue the other Ravens have, and they, too, don’t see Jean as a person, but as an object to be passed around, a creature to abuse)

I think that, in his own way, Kevin does care for Jean. Just not enough.

He cared about Jean… but he still asked Jean to teach him French, knowing full well Jean’s punishment if found out would be terrible. He still gave Jean articles about the Trojans with pictures of Jeremy in them, knowing full well that Riko would make Jean bleed almost to death if he discovered him, because queers don’t belong on his Court, and what else could you possibly be doing with articles about Knox and his team when you can barely read English?

This is what I dislike the most about Kevin. He never thinks about the consequences. Because he doesn’t care. As long as the consequences don’t affect him directly, he doesn’t care

Kevin sees most people as existing for him

(not in the same way as Riko did, who fully believed he owned others; Kevin was simply taught that everyone has a role at Evermore, and Kevin’s is to be one of the best, top of the food chain, and everyone else has do his bidding and take insult after insult from him; he keeps this same behavior with the Foxes and with Jean, this is what we – Kevin critics – mean when we say that Kevin constantly pulls rank: he gives orders and throws insults because he believes it’s his right to do so)

Kevin wanted a friend in the Nest, and here comes this terrified young boy that will cling to anyone that shows him an ounce of gentleness. So Kevin gets a friend, and gets to learn a language they can gossip in that no one else understands, and gets to talk about the Trojans as much as he wants and if Riko finds out, who is he most likely to focus all his wrath on, his brother or the queer foreign boy?

Let me repeat again that Kevin is a victim. Like Thea. Like every Raven. Like Riko.

So why do I dislike him so much? Again, because consequences. All Kevin needs to do to survive the Nest is believe in the Master. He doesn’t need French lessons, he doesn’t need to share articles about the Trojans. He doesn’t need a friend who is Riko’s property

But Kevin still wants all those things and gets them, because fuck what the consequences are for Jean, and that’s what I have an issue with

And then, in that first year in the Nest, their friendships dies, because too much happens between them, too much violence (against Jean), too much abuse (against Jean), too much torture (against Jean), and Jean had to give and give and give to Riko and the Master already, he couldn’t also give to Kevin all that Kevin wanted. Because as I’ve said before, Kevin is a taker, he takes your time and attention and your knowledge of another language and your passion for another team, and in exchange he turns the other way as you get tortured

(not that he could do anything about it, but imagine being Jean and the guy you idolize just wants to use you for what benefits you can bring him)

And if that’s not enough, when Riko breaks his hand, Kevin uses that old, long-dead friendship against Jean to convince him to distract Riko as he makes his escape

“If you were ever friends with me, get him out of my room.”

And Jean does

And Kevin escapes

And Jean almost gets killed by Riko for it

And in TSC we get a moment that is very important but easily forgotten: when Jean is staying at Abby’s and Kevin visits him, Jean sees bottomless guilt in his eyes

That’s something, right?

I do think Kevin and Leo are parallels, but still, I would not compare them beyond a surface-level assessment, beyond the guy uses you when he can benefit from it, but doesn’t care for you the rest of the time

Yes, on the surface Kevin and Leo are both the subjects of misplaced, ill-advised affection, they are untrustworthy, selfish and would 100% do it again

But Leo is just a rich kid, a privileged asshole, someone who could make so many different choices and yet he always chooses to hurt Jeremy

Kevin never had much of a choice. He was in a cult. Yes, he was treated like a little god, a prince of the court always serving his King by most of the people at Evermore. But he was still abused by the Master like every other Raven. And he was still stuck with Riko

In the beginning their relationship wasn’t too terrible, in a world of abuse, they clung to each other. Kevin hated Riko like he hated nobody else, but he also loved Riko like he loved nobody else. He arrived at the Nest as a kid, after losing his mother, his entire world. He needed something, someone to cling to or he would lose his mind with grief and never survive the Master’s abusive tactics. And this is what cults do, no one is safe because they know how to take advantage of your grief, how to make sure you fall into their clutches when you’re at your weakest (and in Kevin’s and Jean’s case, they orchestrated the conditions for such grief to happen in the first place, by killing Kayleigh and convincing the Moreaus into trafficking their son). Pretty soon he started to believe the Master’s teachings, that he belonged by Riko’s side, his perpetual second, his submissive adoptive brother. He accepted that, convinced himself of it. To survive. And he was content with his life, with the bright future he had ahead of him if only he could endure and ignore what was happening around him

But then the Master gave Jean to Riko, and Riko got a taste of absolute power over another person, and impunity, and he slowly started descending into madness. That was always his fate, with all the pressure the Master put on him, and all the disappointment of being a spare Moriyama, but I believe that Jean was the catalyst for the Riko-madness speedrun.

Maybe Riko would have shattered Kevin’s hand in every universe; maybe that was the inevitable ending, because Riko is Riko, and Kevin is Kevin, and once Thea puts it in Kevin’s mind that he is better than the King, he inevitably, in every universe, starts testing the limits, pushing boundaries; and in every universe the Master notices his talent and decides to pit them against each other to determine who’s the rightful King

Or maybe Riko only shatters Kevin’s hand in this universe, the universe where Jean was his property, where he became addicted to having absolute power over someone else and torturing those who were already down

Which would mean that without Jean, without all the horrible things he endured in the Nest, in this universe Kevin could never be free

Kevin’s freedom comes at Jean’s expense, not only on that terrible day, but from the moment Jean was born

And isn’t that a terrible thought?

(and also… the only reason Kevin manages to escape is that Jean is kind, that one mention of their dead friendship is enough to convince Jean to distract the monster, and isn’t that also terrible? That Jean’s kindness was almost his demise? … but then, Renee realizes Jean is dying because Jean decides that his last coherent action in his existence is to text her to thank her, so Jean’s kindness is also what saves him and I-- askgfsjfgshafkjb)

Anyway, Kevin didn’t have much of a choice. I am angry that he left Jean to die, took advantage of Jean’s gentle nature and trapped him into distracting Riko. If Riko was angry before, he was absolutely furious once he realized Jean helped Kevin escape (albeit unknowingly)

And I’m angry about the French lessons and the Trojan articles, and all the instances where Jean would be brutally punished if found out while Kevin could just shrug the whole incident off, just like he shrugs off the fact that Jean was raped several times. I’m boiling with rage

But I also understand that Kevin was an abused teenager who grew up in a cult. He was desperate to have a friend in the Nest. And then he was desperate to escape

And Jean knows that:

Jean never expected Kevin to protect him. Jean never expects anyone to protect him. Zane only does so in exchange for a spot on the Perfect Court, and even he would never dare contradict Riko. Yes, Kevin had some sway with Riko, Riko did love him in his own way, but at the end of the day, Riko is a Moriyama, and Kevin is not (and even as a Moriyama, your value depends entirely on your date of birth). By normal standards, their dynamic is less of brothers and more of master and pet (Nora verbatim calls Kevin Riko’s pet in the extra content). You love your pets, you indulge them when it costs you nothing (history classes) but if you’re an abusive piece of shit, you will also always put them back in their place whenever they overstep

And remember when Neil was in the Nest? Jean was his partner, and yet he couldn’t protect him from Riko’s violence. Didn’t even try. All he could do was patch him up and beg him to behave

Jean never expected Kevin’s help. That’s how things work in the Nest

Jean would’ve slashed Kevin’s tires to prevent his escape. Not as a way to avoid Riko’s wrath. But because he knew that with a broken hand Kevin would only last a couple of months in the Nest before killing himself. And at that point Jean would be free to follow.

For Jean, Kevin’s worst slight against him was not leaving him in the Nest to die

It was keeping him out of it to live

Don’t get me wrong, a part of Jean will always suffer because of Kevin’s betrayal, and I do think that a part of him wants Kevin to die for reasons unrelated to their promise, purely because he wants to be free from Kevin Day, because Kevin Day represents everything that was done to him in the Nest

For a couple of years, Kevin symbolized a reprieve in the midst of a nightmare

But now?

Now that Jean is living in the light of the California sun, Kevin symbolizes the fear, the anger, the powerlessness Jean felt in those awful years at Evermore

Kevin went from being a dream within a nightmare, to part of the nightmare itself

Following him all the way to California

One look too close at Kevin, and Jean is transported back to all the painful punishments he incurred because of Kevin

(directly - the French lessons, Kevin's escape - and indirectly - Riko realizing Jean is queer and deciding to torture the queerness out of him)

That’s why I keep bringing up Jean's reaction to close contact with Kevin, so strong, so visceral that Jeremy is perplexed by it:

This goes beyond the internalized homophobia of: "oh, shit, I was attracted to a guy", or the reminder that "oh, shit, I was attracted to this guy"

This is the horror of someone who's awaiting punishment, who's feeling breath on the back of his neck and blades against his skin. Jean might even be experiencing a proper flashback of all the painful things he's had to bear because of "this guy"

Jeremy is not jealous in that moment. He is perplexed. Concerned. Because Jean was spiraling and he didn't understand why

So what can Jean do now?

I know we all want vindication for Jean. We all want an epic badass moment where Jean punches Kevin in the face and tells him to fuck off. We all want Kevin begging for forgiveness on his knees (as if!)

But deep down, all I want is for Jean to feel indifferent

He deserves to be relieved of all the powerfully negative feelings Kevin elicits in him

I want Jean to be free

Free of every ghost belonging to the Nest... and Kevin is one of them

And sure, one could feel liberated after punching someone in the face lol

But violence is the Ravens' way

The best possible thing Nora can do for Jean, is have him walk away from Kevin

That's the closure he deserves

And I don't mean forever, before I get attacked again by Kevin stans. But right now Jean hates Kevin, and I want him to stop feeling such negative emotions and focus on himself, and all the positivity around him

Jean "getting over Kevin" doesn't necessarily mean shutting Kevin out of his life completely

But right now I do think it’s necessary, Jean simply cannot heal with Kevin around, because Kevin is still a Raven at heart:

In a few years I can see them having the same relationship they have right now (barely interacting, but being mostly civil with each other when they have to), minus the hatred and violence simmering right under the surface

One day they could even have the same type of rapport Kevin has with Jeremy at the moment, of long-distance approval, maybe even admiration

They could, potentially, become friendly in the future

(I don't know about proper friends, though: Nora said Kevin's behavior forever destroyed any chance at a friendship with Jean, that at the moment Kevin doesn't have any friends, and it'll take him years, well into his pro career, to create genuine bonds with Neil, Andrew, Jeremy, even Thea, despite her being the closest person to him right now - and that says a lot, too)

But right now I just want Jean to be free

And the same goes for Jeremy, and it goes far beyond Leo, he is a stand-in for the Wilshires, and that is Jeremy’s main issue

Jeremy and Jean feel so much

That the best type of vindication can only come from them not feeling anything anymore for the people that hurt them

Jean needs to walk away from Kevin to heal, and Jeremy needs to walk away from Leo, the hookups and the Whilshires to heal

In a way, Jean is in a better, more promising situation than Jeremy. Because Jean is far away from the Nest, and has minimal contact with Kevin. But Jeremy is forced to see his family every day, and forces himself to see Leo because hookups are the only thing he can control at the moment

Boy, oh, boy, Jeremy is about to break

And Jean will be there to hold him together

And maybe at the end of it all they will finally start living

(I'm not sure my heart can take it 🥹 I'm not ready for Book 3 but at the same time I am SAT)

#jeremy knox #jean moreau #jerejean #kevin day #aftg #tsc #tgr

27 notes · View notes

the-ate-show · 3 months ago

Text

00:07 The Muse Wc: 8.0K

A/N: lil relationship moment to give some backstory, lil mixed media in there

The air was nice, cool enough to not have to bundle up. Tonight, your nerves were on fire. You smoothed over your dress once more, making sure it fit just right. You were supposed to be interviewing the creators of this popular tv series, trying to figure out some new addition to your article. With one final adjustment to yourself on camera, you and the videographer took your designated spots. The celebrities filed in, occasionally stopping to give you their two cents. You scribbled notes, played along with their words, and tried to be respectful.

Thankfully, your connections paid off, and you were swept away to be one of the insiders. This was new, you were nervous, but pushed through, taking interviews in a controlled environment, and receiving many compliments on your outfit and conduct. It was only a short list of A-listers to ask, then a few more lower grades. What interested you was a bold instruction written on your guide, ‘LEAVE SCREEN WRITER’, you had inquired, and your cameraman told you he had a tendency of ditching the interviews, so he was a waste of time.

“Point him out to me,” you asked, and the man scanned the area, then pointed at a man stood off to the side, nursing some red wine.

He had a very brooding look to him, captivating almost. You ultimately decided not to talk to him.

You parted from your camera man, with clear instructions to both you and him to just enjoy the rest of the night. You figured now would be a good time to organise a few of your thoughts before your ride arrived. You sat on a little table in the corner, taking out your notepad and trying to decipher your illegible handwriting. You must’ve been at it for a while, until you noticed someone join you at the other side of the table. Habitually, you got up, but the person lifted a hand up gesturing for you to stop.

You sat back down, recognising him immediately.

“You didn’t come for an interview,” he took a sip out of his cup from earlier, eyes casted at a distant table.

“I was told you weren’t a fan of those, mr. Yu,”

“Ah, appears you know more than it seems.”

“I did my research,” you smiled softly. “I’m not meant to speak my bias, but your work on this movie is undeniable skill. In this specific area of work, I tend to have to talk to alot of people who’ve only pulled strings. Your work on that movie was phenomenal, sir,”

He didn’t respond, only sat up a little straighter and finally looked at you. He took a quick survey of you, humming at the expensive purse you carried.

“Well,” his lips tugged at the corners slightly, “I’m an open book,” he gestured to your notepad and you nodded quickly, clicking your pen and writing down his answers to your questions.

That night, excitement bubbled inside of you, and you pulled an all nighter to finish up the article. It was very centered around him, this was huge after all, for someone dubbed ‘elusive and exclusive’, you got very easy access to his thoughts. You felt like a superhero of some kind. The article was perfectly drafted by the third time, and you sent it off to your agency for them to give it a scan. You slept soundly that night, draped on your couch in a position that would definitely cause neck problems in the morning.

Approved, published, and boosted your career even further. You were over the moon!

Life dulled down a bit after that, with no new hotshots to talk to or celebrities to chase down, you spent your time writing up bigger, longer articles on something you dubbed ‘Social Rebirth’. Countless celebrities seemed to have suddenly sprung into fame, with gaps in their timelines that indicate there’s more to them than what meets the eye. You were up writing particularly late, some cheesy early 2000’s music playing as you replayed the same files over and over again in hopes you’ll catch a change in time stamps.

A ping popped up on your phone, a notification from email. You launched the app on your laptop, half expecting another ad on deals that somehow slipped your spam box.

Instead… a curious little sender.

FROM: [email protected]

TO: [email protected]

Dear miss…,

Hope this email finds you well. I reviewed your article about me, and I have to say, I’m impressed. You have a very eloquent way of articulating your words, in a mesmerizing fashion that kept me hooked. Oddly, I find myself regretting not giving you more information, as that article didn’t feel long enough. Perhaps we should arrange another interview, you’ll find I have much to offer.

Kind regards,

Phillip Yu, screenwriter.

Oh crap. You didn’t expect him to actually read it, no one ever did! It wasn’t made for celebrity consumption, and you wondered how many snide jokes you snuck in, as usual, without knowing he’d read it. He sent it only recently, so you responded.

FROM: [email protected]

TO: [email protected]

Dear Mr Yu,

Thank you for your feedback, and kind words. I try to not cross the line between professional and invasive questions, which I seem to have very clumsily blurred during our conversation.

Although, if you feel as though you’d be comfortable giving me more to work with, then another article would surely be in the works.

Signed.

You leaned back, rubbing your hand up and down your face, then grabbing a bite of food. You just about went to take another when a reply came.

FROM: [email protected]

TO: [email protected]

Dear miss,

That was quite the fast response, are journalists nocturnal? 🤔

No worries, you didn’t come off clumsy at all. How about tomorrow evening at sunshine cafe, 18:00?

Kind regards,

Phillip Yu, screenwriter.

You stuttered a bit, unsure of how to reply. Between his lame joke and the impending invite, you struggled to find a response.

FROM: [email protected]

TO: [email protected]

Haha, most of us tend to have unruly sleep schedules, part of the gig I assume.

I’m glad, see you there!

The next morning you could hardly think straight, drumming up questions, words to use to sound more impressive, potential outfits, so much to do, so little time. By 5:25, you were out the door, despite it only being a ten minute walk. You recited your introduction again and again in your head, sometimes out loud too, which the stray cats judged you for. You finally arrived, deciding to grab you both a seat when you noticed him already there. You took a deep breath, then walked over to the seat adjoining his. He got up, shaking your hand and smiling professionally.

“Nice to see you again,” you started, sitting down as he did. “Truly and honor to have this opportunity,”

“Please. It’s my honor. ” he shook his head, “I’ve reviewed some of your other work, all very fascinating topics, I tend to stray away from journalists to avoid,” he gestured vaguely, “Media issues,”

You nodded, pursing your lips, “It’s a slippery slope, one moment a serious topic the next a secret. It's important to be able to balance gossip and facts.”

He nodded along, “Appears we’re both early. I was going to take this time to look over the menu,” he said with an embarrassed laugh. You giggled.

“Me too actually, came to get comfortable first and I guess we had the same idea,”

A sweet waiter came over and took you guys’ order shortly after, and you began the interview.

“So, sir,”

“Just Yu is fine,”

You blinked, suddenly forgetting what you were going to say. “Right, Yu, uhm there seems to be a few gaps in your wiki page, if you don’t mind I start with those,”

“Not at all,” he sipped on his coffee, black.

You clicked your pen, starting to finally enter your zone, “What did you study in university?”

“Film studies,” he replied immediately.

“And what inspired you to-”

“And you?”

“Pardon?”

“What did you study?”

You giggled slightly, taking a sip of your own drink, “You’re not supposed to ask me questions,”

“Well how’s that fair?” he frowned, but there was a hint of playfulness in his actions.

“Majored in communication, minored in media ethics,” you smiled and he made an impressed face.

“I’ve always had an affinity for theatre,” he spoke, and you jotted down in note format what he said. “The spoken word, the written word, could never speak to me like the imagery that could be created from mere concepts. Anything is possible, with just the right ideas.”

You nodded along, “So you think a good film can be enticing without the need for speech?”

“Speech is necessary for captivation, but what is more important is body language.” He adjusted himself to stare at you directly, and you caught his gaze with a nervous smile, trying to decipher what he’s doing. “You’re nervous,”

“Doesn’t take a genius,”

“No, it doesn’t.” he gave you another once over. “You’re trying to seem more open to get me to speak more, trying to match my pace and using flattery to ensure this doesn’t go south,”

“In typical fashion of someone who’s just trying to do their job right,” you squirmed a bit, feeling like his words were beginning to hit too close.

You clicked your pen again, setting it down. He quirked an eyebrow, you licked your lips and spoke. “This one is off the records,” he nodded. You brought a hand up to rest your cheek on, narrowing your eyes slightly to try to get a read on him. “Why do you hate interviews so much?”

He pressed his lips into a thin line, pushing his glasses up his nose. You stared at him encouragingly.

“Being hounded with personal questions. Negative stringing of words together.”

“Bad press,” you nodded, smiling as the food came out. “You could say that,”

You both ate in silence for a moment, then he spoke. “Why’re you nervous? This is your job,”

You shrugged, “Never done it in this kind of setting, or with someone as closed off,”

He raised an eyebrow and you backtracked, “I mean, you’ve been nothing but an open book, it’s just that- you know you usu-”

“I understand,” a small smile pulled at the corner of his lips. You sighed, choosing to just stuff your face to prevent making a fool of yourself until you recollected your thoughts.

“So your movie,” you started, “‘Cogito ergo sum’, what exactly had inspired you?”

“Well, in all actuality…”

And thus, the interview was concocted, and you went home, deciphering your notes and trying to draft a valid piece.

‘I think, therefore I am. But what are we? The age old question. This movie, a simple step into a deeper universe of what humans really come down to, and what a person truly is. What is intention and what is action? How do we separate between good and bad?

I had the privilege of conversing with talented screen writer Philip Yu, where he shared with me some details about the movie you may not know, as well as more insight as to why he truly refrains from the limelight’

You leaned back, staring at your notes, then at your half finished takeout bag, then at your laptop. You got up to grab the food from the earlier meeting, when you noticed a napkin with some neat black inked writing.

“Dear miss…

Please do send me the article link when it’s finished, as I am ever curious.

Thanks, Philip Yu,”

On the back of the napkin? His phone number. You bit your lip, immediately saving it on your phone, then sitting back on the couch with your food. You smiled a little to yourself, celebrating this career success.

The article was sent, returned and signed off within a few days, and you watched it gain traction lovingly. In a moment of peace, you texted him.

You giggled a little, feeling your face heat up.

A little while later, he texted you back a date, time, and place. A fancy little restaurant downtown with shining reviews, on the following Friday at 6pm. You decided to just meet there, given it’s probably a horrible idea to give a stranger your address.

So, you searched your outfit for a pretty maroon dress, with glittery details and a lovely cut. You spent hours getting ready, perfecting your hair and makeup, testing out different heels from past events, and jewelry you were gifted. By the time 5:20 rolled around, you were ready, just taking a few phone calls as you walked down, your friend had very kindly offered to give you a ride, seeing as your car’s tires had been slashed a week earlier by someone who was definitely sent by a celebrity. You entered her little car, smiling at her.

“Hey,”

“Hey yourself! Excited?”

“Nervous,”

“Oh I bet! A screenwriter. He’ll turn your date into a movie,”

“Oh har har,” you rolled your eyes. “I’d be lucky if I don’t fumble with my words the entire time. Have you seen him?”

“The dude in the glasses you interviewed? Total cutie, but I must say, the glasses make him look like some kind of tech wiz,”

“He might be. I should ask that,” you scribbled it into your notes app, right after the twenty two other conversation starters. She leaned over at a red light and snatched your phone.

“Hey-”

“Ah ah ah, you need to be normal. No overplanning,”

“I just don’t wanna come off weird,” you sighed.

“But you are weird. Who else writes down what they’re interested in so they don’t forget?”

“Plenty of people!”

She made a ‘settle down’ gesture with her hands, rolling her eyes. “Relax juliette,”

You pouted, sinking into your chair.

“If this all goes south, text me, I’ll make up an emergency,”

“Say your grandma fell down the stairs,”

“Why does it always have to be my grandma? I like her, I feel weird saying she fell. The poor lady,”

“Do whatever girl, it doesn’t matter,” you sighed as you pulled up.

“Are you gonna text him?” she asked, parking.

“He’s here,” you responded, checking yourself in the mirror.

“How do you know?” she raised an eyebrow.

“Just saw him enter.” you smelt your breath and nodded. “How do I look?”

“Like a doll. Now go do your best, you’re live in five,” she joked and you giggled, thanking her for the ride and stepping out. You made your way to the entrance, heart beating out of your chest.

At the doorway, the hostess asked for your reservation, you said your name and they walked you to a secluded table. Candles illuminated the space, a soft jazz band playing somewhere nearby.

He got up immediately upon seeing you, smiling warmly and extending a hand to shake yours.

“Hey,” you said quietly, watching as he pulled your chair out. “And they say chivalry is dead,”

He chuckled a little, sitting on the other side. You spoke, “Did I keep you waiting?”

“Not at all,” he finally spoke, he cleared his throat, opening the menu.

You felt a little awkward, he didn’t seem very interested in small talk. Alas, you opened the pages, inspecting what they had to offer.

“Any recommendations?” you asked, pursing your lips.

“The steak here is a delight,” he spoke ever so formally, which made you second guess whether or not this was a date.

“Right, what’re you getting?”

“The steak,”

Right right riiiiggghhttt. Stupid question. Where’s your notes app when you need it?

He called the waiter over, who took two orders of steak, as well as some appetizers and drinks. Yu kept his eyes trained on the table, only occasionally looking up to steal glances. You leaned back, already feeling slightly disgruntled.

“Soooo…”

He looked up at you, waiting for your continuation. “Are you… up to date with the latest technology?”

“I’m not sure I follow…?”

“Nevermind,”

The food came after that, and conversation stopped while you both ate. You definitely felt dejected, like this whole thing was a major bust. By the end of your meal, you offered to split the bill, which he only gave you a disgusted look at while passing his very high end card to the waiter. On the way out, he opened the door for you. You thanked him, and you both stood side by side in front of the restaurant for a while.

“Do you need a ride?” he asked, swallowing.

“I can just Uber,” you responded.

“It’s okay, I can drive you, I insist.” you nodded, and he led you over to his car. A sleek, matte black ride, close to the ground, could be a convertible.

“Sweet ride,” you whistled upon seeing it, and for the second time tonight, he smiled.

“Thank you,”

He opened the door for you, then went to the drivers side, starting the engine as you gave him directions.

The ride was silent, aside from the ambience of the car noises. This night was a total bust, you’d spent half of it spaced out, and the other trying to decipher what he was thinking, and the steak wasn’t even good. You’d severely misread the room, this was most definitely not a date, and you got all dressed up for it. He must think you’re some kind of desperate loser. You finally reached your house, you bid him a good night, which he swiftly returned, and you sulked up to your apartment, removing your heels at the door and dragging your feet every step. You wiped off your makeup, took a shower, got into your pajamas and wallowed in bed while your cat sat next to you, listening to you rant. You opted to just not text him, leave the ball in his court and just go to sleep.

You missed your alarm on Saturday, groaning as you woke up to the sunlight filtering in your room, and your cat meowing at his lack of breakfast.

“M’cominnggg relax,”

You kept your eyes closed, trying to get more shut eye before a knock came at your door. Weird, considering it wasn't even noon yet. You slipped into your slippers, stumbling past your wailing companion to the door, making sure to grab a robe on the way. You rubbed the sleep out your eyes, then opened it, to find a delivery guy. He held a bouquet of flowers and a note. You furrowed your eyebrows.

“Package for miss…”

“Yeah? I didn’t order anything though?” you grabbed it, looking at it funny. “Thanks,” the guy walked off, and you walked towards your kitchen island, staring at the note.

‘Dear…,

My apologies for coming off as rude, I haven’t done this in a while. If you don’t mind, I’d like a do-over whenever you’re free, if you’ll allow me, of course.

Signed, Yu.’

Well, that was certainly a change of events.

So the following Friday, you helped arrange a date. You decided on a slightly less nice restaurant, one you knew the food was great at. Truth be told, your friend’s family owned it. Simple, lots of conversation starters, and great food. You opted to just meet there at 7 for simplicity.

You fumbled with your shoes, then grabbed your purse and headed out the door, casting a quick ‘be good’ over your shoulder. You walked over to the restaurant, trying to soothe your rapid fire nerves. The door decor jingled gently as you pushed it open, smiling at your friend's dad, who just gave you a curt nod as he continued on orders- the place was packed. You threw a glance at the clock, still 6, so you decided to cool off by helping out. Almost like muscle memory, you grabbed some finished plates off of tables, and waited a few more. The place was packed as of now, so you didn’t really have time to chit chat with her. Eventually, by the time 6:30 rolled around, you were just putting orders in when your friend walked up to you, cleaning a cup.

“Isn’t that him?” she gestured with her head outside, a very overdressed man stood staring at the ground near a nice car, holding a bouquet of tulips.

“Yep,”

“He just got here,” she mused. “Both of you are the early types. God you really are made for each other,” you elbowed her.

“I hardly know him. Should I… maybe go out and call him in? Or text him,”

“Nah. Let him come in when he’s ready,”

So you did, spent the next half an hour helping her out, wiping tables and waiting others. He, on the other hand, paced, then smoked, then sat in his car for a little, then paced again, until at 7 sharp he opened the door. You were in the back, grabbing something from the freezer when she ushered you out, all but pushing you into him.

“Hey,” you said softly, feeling underdressed as he dawned pants and a button up with a branded sweater.

“Hey back,” he responded with a nod, trying to match your smile.

“You look great,” you said shyly, adjusting your top.

His eyes widened, and he swallowed, stumbling over his words, and ending up with a simple “Thanks,” which clearly even he wasn't satisfied with. He shoved the colorful bouquet into your face and you grinned.

“Are these for me?” you took them after he nodded, pouting at how cute this way. “Seriously, you shouldn’t have,” you gushed. He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, wishing the ground would just swallow him whole.

A young man came over soon after, bringing you to a table in the far corner. You sat on the chair on the outside, him on the chair on the inside facing you. Bread sticks, menus and condiments decorated the table.

You scanned the menu, and he spoke from behind his, “You also look great,”

You giggled, “Thank you,”

You placed your orders, and the waiter left. He twiddled his thumbs awkwardly, looking anywhere but at you.

“It’s a beautiful night,” you leaned back, gazing out the window. He let out a hum, looking at you, then back at the restaurant with a confused look. You followed his gaze, finding nothing behind you. “Is… everything okay?”

“Perfect. Everything’s perfect,” he trailed off, clearing his throat and just now seeming to notice the bottle non alcoholic spritzer, which he made quick work of opening and pouring into the two wine glasses. He picked yours up to hand it to you, and only now did you notice the intensity of his tremor.

“You seem nervous,” you took the glass from him and he ducked his head, a small smile appearing.

“You’re not supposed to mention that,” he chuckled.

“It’s hard to ignore, I feel bad, is there anything I could do to soothe your nerves?”

“No you’re perfect- I mean it’s perfect,” he furrowed his eyebrows. “I’m fine. It’s fine,”

“Right,”

A moment of silence washed over you two, and the food was delivered. You stared down at the pizza for a moment. “What’s your favorite movie?”

He pushed a tongue into his cheek, “Where the Willows grow,” he smiled.

You raised an eyebrow, “Didn’t you write that one?”

He chuckled, giving a slight nod, raising his hands in surrender.

You whistled, “Thought you could pull a fast one on me? Jokes on you mr smart guy, I did my homework,”

“Oh yeah? Me too, miss know it all,”

You leaned closer, and so did he. “Tell me something I don’t know,”

“Mhm. I know you turned down writing for vogue,”

“Pfft, public information,” you pressed your tongue in your cheek. “I know you had a rebellious phase,”

He gasped, jaw dropping slightly before he recollected himself with a soft chuckle. “You really went for the jugular huh…” he whistled. “You didn’t happen to see any photos of that?”

“Nope. Surprisingly almost all were scrubbed clean from the internet. How fascinating,” you giggled.

“Then?”

“I have connections, pretty boy,” you winked and he made an impressed face, taking a sip of his drink. “Looks like I did more research,”

“Don’t jump the gun here,” he smirked, leaning back and gazing at you from behind his glasses. “I know that hit that was sent out on you wasn’t fake,”

You raised your eyebrows, leaning forward a bit. “Color me impressed, where’d you learn that one?”

He mocked, “Connections,”

“Are you part of the NIS or something?” you asked, half joking, “Don’t kill me, I have a wife and kids,”

He smiled, shaking his head softly. “No. Just a really huge fan,” he leaned forward as well. “Why’d you try to make it look staged?”

“Make sure people won’t get any ideas,” you frowned.

“Smart girl,” he said with an impressed face.

You swallowed thickly, looking at his eyes, then momentarily down to the food. He moved back, leaning his head against the wall behind him, eyes snapping from behind you back down to the food. You turned around, finding nothing, feeling creeped out.

“Can I ask you… a personal question?” He said, looking at his hands. Which were using a fork and knife to cut his pizza. How posh.

“Shoot,”

“What’s your favorite color?” he deadpanned, you gave an incredulous look till a hint of a smile appeared on his face.

“A little deep for a first date, no?”

“Sorry,” he grinned. “It’s a must,”

You gestured to your outfit, “Isn’t it obvious?”

“Good choice,”

“What’s yours?” you humoured him.

“I don’t think I have one,”

“Oh,” you pursed your lips, “Then why’d you ask?”

“Good conversation starter,” he shrugged.

You nodded slowly, “Sooo, do you have any siblings?”

He smiled, “Stop asking me questions you know the answer to,”

“Fair, but still,”

“Fine I’ll bite, I’m an only child,”

“Makes a lot of sense,”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing,” you giggled. “Guess you’re just very… formal,”

“That’s code for weird isn’t it?” he dropped his head and you kicked him gently under the table.

“You’re a little weird, but in a nice way,”

He rolled his eyes playfully, “Thanks,” His eyes landed on another table and he furrowed his brows, this time you scoffed.

“Did you come here to finish me off or something?” you turned around fully, narrowing your eyes to try to find what seemed to distract him so much. Finally, you caught it.

“Have they been there the whole time?” you asked and he nodded. You sighed heavily, turning to face him then getting up, “One moment,” you stormed over before he could stop you, snatching the newspaper from your friend, who wore a fake mustache.

You whisper-yelled, “What gives?!”

“Just making sure you’re fine!” she matched your tone.

A cough from behind you alerted you that her dad was also doing the same. You went back to the table, fumbling in your purse for the tab when Yu grabbed your hand, “What’re you doing?”

“Paying. Since apparently privacy doesn’t exist here,”

He got up, “I got it,”

“No i insis-”

“I got it.” he said firmly, effectively shutting you up. He walked over, scanned his card, you grabbed your purse and flowers before leaving.

The fallen leaves on the sidewalk crunched against both of your shoes. You still simmered inside from her little stunt, and he wore a very uncomfortable look.

“Listen I’m really sorry about them,”

“Who are they?”

“Family friends,” you sighed, “Didn’t realise they were watching,”

He stared at you for a while before breaking into a fit of laughs, “Oh my god, I thought you were being stalked or something. I was a moment away from calling the cops,”

You giggled too, trying to hide your embarrassment. He continued, “It’s kind of sweet though, if I was a serial killer that would've been handy,”

“You wouldn’t have killed me in the middle of the store,”

“No. I would’ve invited you back to my apartment and done it there,”

You were nearing a park when you finally worked up the courage to slide your hands into his, “How romantic,”

He hesitated, then squeezed your hand, still wearing a stupid little smile. You nudged his shoulder and he tilted his head slightly.

“This is a date right?” you teased and he shrank slightly, glancing at his shoes.

“I really messed it up the first time huh,” he pouted.

“This can just be our first time,”

“That’s not how that works,”

“Who’s counting anyways? Plus the flowers you sent were pretty cute,”

“You think?” he said under his breath, trying to suppress an even wider smile.

“Yeah. My cat really liked them as well,”

He made an ��aww’ face, “You have a cat?”

“Yes!” you giggled, “he’s the cutest little thing ever,”

“How fitting,” he smiled and you bit your lip, looking away from him. “Has he got a name?”

“Not yet, no,” you replied. “He’s a rescue,”

“Ah, you’re a pretty moral person then,”

“I try,”

“What breed is he?”

“Ah I forgot the name, one of those expensive ones,”

“Persian? Ragdoll? Short hair?”

You were cut off when a frisbee came flying at the two of you, almost hitting him in the head but he dodged. A dog ran past you both, a huge one, like a german shepherd or husky, in search of the frisbee, effectively knocking you into him. He stopped you from falling, watching the dog owner with a disappointed glare. The man called out a half hearted apology, and you stood up straight.

“Are you okay?”

You nodded, “Yep,”

“How about dessert?”

You huffed, “You’re a bad influence on me, I’m already full,”

“Come on I’m sure you have room for something sweet,”

You both walked over to his car, he opened the door for you and you sat on the maroon leather seats.

“It’s still impressive every time,” you mused as he entered, starting the engine with a shrug.

“My dad and I worked on this one when I was a teenager,”

“No shot,” you scoffed. “It’s ridiculously nice. Didn’t peg you as a car guy though,”

“I’m not, he is, but it got me working with my hands,”

“Ah so you’re like a crafty person?”

“No,” he chuckled. “Moment there’s hot glue involved I fail. I like mechanical work though.”

“Like… changing tires?”

“Do you know a single person who likes changing tires?”

“You maybe,”

“No, I don’t like changing tires. I do like upgrading cars though,”

“Despite not being a car guy,”

“Despite not being a car guy, yes,”

He pulled into a parking lot of a quaint little 24/7 type shop that sold all kinds of processed goodies.

“This is quite the contrast to where we were last time,” you hummed, stepping out of the car, lacing your hands with his again. This time he reciprocated with more confidence.

“Food’s good here, they’ve got good snacks,”

“Aren’t you like a billionaire? Don’t you have like fancy butlers in your house to get you food?” he shook his head in mock annoyance, opening the glass door and letting you in first.

“I’m not like a billionaire, I am a billionaire,” you scoffed and he chuckled, “Plus, no fancy anything could ever compare to these,” he grabbed a soda for himself, then one for you.

“So a trust fund baby. How’d you know it was my favorite?” you furrowed your eyebrows, taking the vanilla drink.

“Thought we already established I did my homework,” he pressed the cold drink into your arm playfully, which made you squirm away from him. “Is that all you see me as?”

“No,” you said on the way to the register, he grabbed a heart shaped cake. “Sorry, used to being able to slip insults in when talking to the upper bracket,”

“And they just let you?”

“Well to be fair they likely miss it, or maybe they let it slide I don’t really know,”

“Makes sense…”

You raised an eyebrow, he grabbed the plastic bag and stared at you with a small smile, continuing, “If such a pretty girl insulted me I’d also let it go,” he walked past you, and you stared at his back as he left, then caught up to him.

“Smooth,” unmistakably so, his cheeks bore a reddened color.

Outside, you struggled a bit to open your soda, considering the cold made you lose your dexterity, so he offered to help. As he came to hand you back your drink, he miscalculated the pass, and it slipped, spilling directly on you. You gasped, and his jaw fell.

He immediately retracted his hand, switching between covering his mouth and stumbling words.

“I’m so sorry,” he finally got to, slipping his sweater off to give to you, leaving him in a button up.

You overcame the shock finally, and laughed, which made him falter.

“It’s fine, no big deal,” you replied, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“No, I should've been more careful,” he shook his head, pulling the sweater over your head, and smiling when you peaked at him. He helped you slip your arms into the respective armholes, then tugged it to straighten it on you.

“It was an honest mistake,”

“Still, I’m really sorry, it was a nice dress,”

“Washing machines exist,” You made a show of putting a hand on your hip, “How does it look?”

“Cute,” he said simply, maintaining his proximity to you.

Perhaps you two would have kissed, had the rain not began to pour in buckets on the street, making you both sigh in annoyance.

“There goes our plans,”

He stared off for a moment, “I live right there… if you’d like to maybe…” he continued the sentence under his breath.

“Wow. Was this all some kind of ploy to take me back to your house? Is this rain even real?” you teased, and his face reddened.

“No I just-”

��And why? Does your car not work in the rain?” you poked his side- he looked like a kicked puppy. “I’d love to,” you responded before the man burst into flames.

He breathed out a sigh of relief, then nodded, “My car’s allergic to water,” he joked.

A short little run to a huge door later, you were in a spacious lobby to a complex. Your heels clicked and clacked against the marble ground, clothes clinging uncomfortably to your skin.

You held your arms close to your body, shivering at the blaring AC while he led you to the elevator.

A man in black holding a pistol in his hand, wearing sunglasses in doors and an earpiece stood near the elevator, no doubt security personnel.

“Mr Yu,” the man ducked his head, and Yu matched his greeting. You remained invisible, a nice change of pace anyways.

The elevator dinged, and a small old woman emerged, doused in branded clothing and expensive accessories. She stared at the drenched floors, then up to you both. Stepping out of the elevator, she held her umbrella close to her body, looking furious.

“What if someone slips?!” she yelled, swatting Yu’s arm with the umbrella. He chuckled slightly and she turned to the guard as you both entered the elevator, “He brings one woman around all of a sudden he’s all rebellious,” she tsked, then turned back to you both as the elevator closed, giving you a once over. “No sleepovers,” she said just as the doors shut.

You blinked at the wall for a few moments, Yu scanning his keycard to take you up to the twentieth floor. You stood side by side, unmoving, until finally, you started to laugh, and so did he.

“Who is that?” you said between giggles.

“My neighbour,” he replied, recovering his composure.

“She’s so cute,”

“She’s a lot of things alright,” he scoffed, and you pinched his arm.

The elevator dinged open, and you entered his apartment, still sopping wet. He set the cake down on the kitchen island, then gestured for you to follow him to his room. The entire walk you couldn’t help but gape at the sheer size of the rooms in his house, you weren’t poor by any means, but this was another level of rich. His room was down the hall, to the right, the door was ajar. He pushed it open, the epitome of neat. Perhaps he had orchestrated it so you’d come over.

“Wow,” you stepped in after him, marvelling at how minimalist it was. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think this was a hotel. Sleek design of black on red, with abstract paintings and a huge window wall. He slid his closet door open, pulling out sweat pants and a hoodie, then turning to you.

“Here,” he smiled, and you took them gratefully.

“Thank you,” you said sweetly. He stepped out to give you privacy to change, and you drew the curtains shut. You heard the door of another room shut, likely that he’s also switching to dry clothing.

You peeled the wet clothes off of your body, replacing them with the warm clean ones he offered, shuddering as the air touched your skin. Once dressed, you inspected yourself in his floor length mirror, making sure you looked semi presentable before cracking the door open slightly. You stepped out experimentally, poking your head into his living room. You were momentarily distracted by quite the gem on the wall, a family photo above his fireplace. You took hesitant steps, stopping just in front of it.

There he was, no older than twelve years old, in between two very serious looking individuals. He looked so cute, in his little oversized glasses covering his innocent face.

“What’re you doing?” you jolted at the sound of his voice, turning to see him drying his hair with a towel, looking at you inquisitively.

You struggled to find the words, feeling like you were caught red handed, “Sorry, came to look for you and saw this,” you turned to it again as he stood next to you. “It’s a very sweet photo,” you whispered softly.

You both just stared at it for a while, and you could see the contemplative look on his face through the glass reflection of the picture frame. He turned to you, offering a clean towel for your hair, then pulling you away wordlessly towards the kitchen.

You sat on opposite sides of the counter, him opening the plastic box to allow you to eat. So, with your forks, you ate quietly for a while, the soft ambience of the outside world drowning out your inhibitions.

“Yu,” you said with utmost care. He hummed non commitantly. “You don’t have a roommate or anything right?” you trailed a finger down the marble countertop.

He shot you a confused look. “No, I live alone,” he said slowly.

“RIght… right..” you responded, glancing back at the rooms. He followed your gaze, still just chewing. “So no one would disturb us,” your voice dripped with what you hoped came across as seduction. Maybe this was a little forward, but so was being in his apartment, in his clothes, at this hour.

“...What?”

“Oh… you know… no one would hear us…” you secretly hoped he’d just get the hint.

He did not, instead now looking adequately disturbed, “Why?” He leaned back a fraction of a centimeter, not so discreetly trying to make sure you’re unarmed.

The look that crossed your face must have been so concerned that it alarmed him.

“Is there… something you want to say?” he asked, through a very poor attempt at a poker face.

“No… nothing,” you took a bite of cake to balm the sting.

“Did you wanna… do something?”

That made you perk up, and you nodded. He nodded too, “Like… watch a movie?”

Oh you sweet summer child. “Movie sounds great,” you said through gritted teeth.

One movie, containing the wrong kind of action, later, he offered you a ride home, which you graciously accepted. He had dried off your dress from earlier, and you wore it again, thanking him profusely for the change on the elevator ride down while he apologised again for messing your dress up. The ride home this time was filled with chatter, and giggles, and reminiscing of this date and the last one, which you dubbed a business meeting. He parked in front of the building, and walked you to the entrance of your apartment complex.

“So this is my stop,” you smiled, and he let out a long, awkward, breath of air.

“I had a great time tonight,” he started, “And I’m sorry again about your dress, and last time,”

“Again, water under the bridge,” you stepped forward a little, adjusting the collar of his shirt. “Plus, you kind of already made it up to me,” he chuckled. “Tonight was wonderful, thank you for the flowers.. And the food.. And the company,”

You stared at each other for a while, wedged in place, both faces painted with smiles.

“Good night,” he said through half lidded eyes.

You leaned in without thinking, kissing him on the cheek. “Good night, Yu,”

By this point, you’d gotten pretty comfortable around each other, 2 years is a long time.

You’d finally, finally, found a worthy thing to talk about, a scandal involving mistreatment of staff by a particular director. He was notorious for being a billionaire playboy, but behind closed doors it appears he’d been sued frequently for abuse of power and creating a hostile workplace. You knew him, of course, you’d interviewed him time and time again, allowed all his remarks about you to slide in order to stay professional. You spent a while working on smaller projects to give yourself adequate time to really flesh out the story, find sources and under the table witnesses. It cost your agency a hefty sum, but they knew the payout would be massive.

It was another one of those late night writing sessions, propped up on your kitchen counter, sipping on a juice box while writing out some notes. Your door opened, you craned your head, casting Philip a smile.

“Hey babe,” he grinned as he entered, giving your cat a little poke as he passed into your kitchen, only stopping to give you a kiss on the cheek. “Hey,” you responded, “Didn’t know you’d be coming over tonight,”

“Needed a change of pace,” he grumbled, undoing his tie and the top two buttons. “I’m going crazy,”

“Don’t do that,” you giggled, he joined you by sitting on a stool next to you.

“Whatcha working on?” he lit a cigarette, casting you a sheepish look through his eyelashes, “Sorry,”

“Just make sure to open the window,” you rolled your eyes, “An article,”

“No shot,” he rolled his eyes, offering you a hit. You accepted. “What kind of article? About what?”

“Do you remember ‘anchor’?”

“Anchor?” he kissed his lips, “The bald director guy?”

“Ding ding ding,” you exhaled the smoke, passing it to him again. “He’s been involved in a lot of major controversies recently, for some reason completely untouched by the media,”

He messed with the waistband of your pants absentmindedly, “Don’t you think there might be a reason for that?”

“Absolutely. Money,”

“Not just that. Tell me you’re not writing an article about a man who won’t hesitate before ending your career, and then you,” he rubbed his forehead.

You shrugged, “I’ve done worse. Besides, he’s a really crappy person,”

“If you die you better come back to haunt me,” he joked, getting up and killing his cigarette in the sink, then kissing your forehead.

“Done deal,” you watched him scoop your cat up in one hand.

The cat meowed in protest, and he meowed back, flopping down on your couch. You could see him from here, holding the little feline up in air jail.

“Why do I have to end up with the one girl that has a death wish?” he asked ‘muffin’ dramatically, who meowed in agreement. “You’re right. She’s reckless. And when she inevitably bites the dust for messing with the wrong people I’m donating you to science,”

“PHILIP YU,”

…

The closer you got to the deadline, the more anxious you became, trying your best to perfect every detail down to the synonyms. Yu became more distant as the time grew, but you chalked it up to cumulative stress from his job and parents. You were just fixing up your final draft in your office, deciding on a title when he walked in holding a brown paper bag. He closed the door behind him, avoiding your prying eyes.

“Well this is a surprise,” you mused, inspecting the bag, which contained a singular cupcake in it, “not unwelcome though,” you took it out, humming at the chocolatey flavor. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

He forced a smile, sitting down opposite you, “Can we talk for a moment?”

“If it’s bad news maybe let's talk later? I’m about to finally send this in,” you smiled, he shook his head.

“Don’t… send it in, yet at least,”

You stared at him for a moment, he didn't speak. “Yu…”

“I haven’t been entirely honest with you. The meetings I’ve been attending… have actually been with anchor.”

Your eyebrows shot up, he resumed. “I know you’re not entirely fond of him, but he’s presenting me with an opportunity I can’t decline,” his shoulders slumped. “You know how hard it’s been trying to get back in the scene.”

“He’s going to exploit you,” you dropped your voice an octave. “He’ll suck you dry from ideas and take all the credit Phil this is a bad idea,”

“I don’t have another choice!”

“Okay…” you sighed. “Okay.” you stared down at your computer, then the cupcake, then up at him. “Wait a minute, are you asking me not to expose him?”

He gave a singular nod. “I know this is really crappy of me,” you stood up, and he matched it, putting his arms up in surrender. “He told me he loved my concepts, but by association with you and your article people will be more inclined to believe your gossip because they’d think you got it from me,”

“My gossip?” you scoffed, rounding the table to stand face to face. “This gossip is what kept me afloat, is what allowed victims to come forth with their stories, it’s my job!”

“And this is mine!”

He stood up, matching your offensive stance, “You know how important this is for me- this is huge!”

“I put in weeks of effort into this!”

“Please,” his voice broke, arms grabbing your shoulder, face inches from yours. “I need this,”

You pushed his arms off of you, scoffing loudly. “I need this! I’m tired of reporting small town news,”

“Just a little while longer and the-”

“No! You’re not thinking clearly!” you stomped your foot loudly, in the fashion of a tantrum. “You go into this deal it’s a lose-lose situation,”

“Who loses here?”

“You lose to his claws, and I lose work that I lost sleep over,”

“You’ll find something else, he’s not a bad guy-”

You swiped your hands down your face, sniffing, “Phillip have you listened to a single thing I’ve ever said about him or did you just tune me out?”

“I listened,” he crossed his arms.

“DId you hear how he’s a master manipulator? Sued countless times over for misconduct? Known for producing a hostile work environment? Preying on trusting people? Did you hear me say all those things, and cite my sources?”

He sighed, staying quiet and staring at the ground. His eyes glistened.

You licked your lips, “Listen-”

“No you listen,” he said, meeting your gaze firmly. “If you post this article….” he stared at the ceiling, keeping his tears at bay, “We’re done,”

It was so quiet in there, you were sure he could hear your heartbeat. “Excuse me?” you scoffed.

“I- I mean it.”

“You’re dumping me because of… a producer?”

“Director, and not because of him, it’s the prin-”

“Get out,”

A/N: UGH okay this took literal ages because A- uni's been a major pain and B- lost interest in the story. Oops. anyways, enjoy this, the ride's almost over!!Taglist:

@entr4p3 @vlurdao @sweet1squash

#the 8 show #7th floor #Philip Yu #the 8 show x reader #Philip yu x reader #7th floor x reader #kdrama #k drama

29 notes · View notes

drunknillawafer · 8 months ago

Text

right down the line: zuko x firebender!reader | part 6

You grew up close to the Royal Family due to your father's position as a General, but you ran away from home after the agni kai against your best friend, Zuko. Now, you've joined the Gaang and plan on doing your part in ending the 100-year war.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 7

hellooo part 6 oo we're in book 2 territory now... also i am changing stuff to fit my character into this world so just be open to those changes plzzz i do not own these characters and they are not mine! i hope you guys are liking the story so far! I'm so excited I'm already thinking about what I'm going to do when book 3 comes around... rmr to like reblog or comment, i truly want to know ur thoughts because this is my first fic so i hope I'm doing a good job. thank you to everyone who has supported it so far!! even if its 17 ppl idc like that's 17 individuals who bother to read what i write so... thank you!! enjoy >.< about 2000 words

⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

It was a day like the others, the year before Ozai’s unfair punishment. I’d go to the Royal Palace after school to play or practice, whichever we felt like.

When Zuko and I opened the door that led to the duck pond, his little sister, Azula, was already there with her friends, Ty Lee and Mai.

Azula’s already proven to be ruthless for a 10-year-old. She’s constantly reminding Zuko of his ‘failure’ to live up to the responsibility of Fire Lord just because he’s not as vicious as her. In this home, they favored brutality over honor, and if you know Zuko, he’s all honor. Even at twelve years old, you can tell he won’t grow to be like his father before him and it’s a problem.

She’s only gotten worse since their mother disappeared 2 years ago. No one knows the specifics, but Azula says their grandfather ordered the Fire Lord to kill Zuko and she never lets him forget it.

As we walk toward our usual spot, the little girl comes up to us.

“Zuzu, come play with us!” she says with a hint of mischief in her voice.

“No! I’m busy.” Zuko replies, brushing her off. We continue walking to reach the other side of the pasture, far away from his sister and her friends.

“Fine.” With Azula, fine isn’t just fine. It’s code for I’ll get you somehow.

But I try to keep my thoughts about her to myself. She is younger than us and I’m not scared of her. It’s Zuko she doesn’t see as a threat. As for me, she’s known not to push it. Since we all have the same fire-bending master, she’s well aware I’m better than the both of them.

When we reach our spot, we sit to take our swords from their sheaths. Today it’s blades, yesterday it was bending. We almost forget Azula’s in our vicinity when Mai comes crashing down onto Zuko, making her blush.

Mai is a year younger than us, and she’s always had this crush on him. Everyone knows. I know.

But unlike Azula, I don’t humiliate her with the fact. Even if the thought of Zuko returning the feelings makes me uncomfortable.

Mai quickly gets up and apologizes for stumbling on top of him and Zuko, in all his emotional glory, yells at his sister. “Stop it! It’s not funny.”

She grins with her arms folded. “Oh, but it is, dumb-dumb. I told you to play with me!”

“That’s not how you get people to play with you!” I stand up for him, knowing it’s a losing battle if he’s all alone in his defense.

“Whatever.” She replies and focuses her attention on Ty Lee’s handstand. Probably thinking of a way to ruin that too.

It’s clear we won’t be left alone to spar in peace.

“Want to go to my room?” He asks. Familiar amber eyes gazing into mine.

Butterflies appear in my stomach. I’ve been to his room thousands of times, millions if it was possible. It wasn’t abnormal. But lately, I can’t stop these stupid bugs.

My feelings for my best friend are changing, I just hope his are too.

“Sure.”

A few weeks have passed since the failed ambush of the Northern Water Tribe by the Fire Nation. Admiral Zhao is presumed dead, and the empire retreated. They were long gone, and this loss was too shameful to ever attempt something like it again.

Though, the adrenaline from the win would be nothing compared to the loss felt by the masses. We lost some people, rebuilding was commencing, and the tribe had lost their princess. The Chief had lost his daughter.

While it pained Sokka and I to inform him of the news, what he said in return brought peace to all of us. He said he had a vision of a beautiful young woman sacrificing her life for her people and it wasn’t until that fateful day that he knew it was his daughter. Warmth embraced us all after he spoke. What better way to show your love for your people than to become the moon itself? It was bittersweet. To know she couldn’t walk with us but be with us wherever we go on planet Earth.

If only I knew how I felt about encountering Zuko for the first time in three years.

I honestly didn’t know what to think, act, or be. It all happened so fast.

Having to save Aang in the middle of our encounter distracted me long enough. Letting down the Chief and Yue becoming the moon spirit distracted me long enough. Hell, seeing Iroh for the first time in a while distracted me long enough. But eventually, the dust settles and there’s nothing but his face in my thoughts.

His hair is different, and he looks… sharper around the edges. He’s stronger and his bending is different than before, more determined and intentional. He seems tired.

I replay our interaction in my head multiple times a day, sometimes in my dreams. Each time, I think about what I could have said instead. Other times he doesn’t strike me in the ribs. But then I wake up or come back to reality and the scar of his burn on my side reminds me: he’s no longer my Zuko.

I mourn the gentle boy I once knew.

All our good moments flash through my mind like an orchestrated play. Growing up together. Elementary memories of playing and later, practicing our sparring and bending together. Silent moments where we both sat and stared as the sun painted orange across the sky, once we were done for the day. Being the first person we looked for at a royal party and feeling relief when our eyes locked together, assuring that we won’t spend the night bored out of our minds. Silly things I didn’t think I’d miss so much.

But it was hard to feel bad for him when he was someone else entirely.

I shouldn’t have, but I took it easy on him. I thought there was some sort of silent agreement that we would never hurt each other, like when we were sparring. But at some point in time, practice became fighting, and nobody told me.

I spent three years thinking about this exact moment and I never once thought we’d be on two different sides of this war.

It was different for him, I suppose. He stopped practicing the moment Ozai told him to get up and fight.

The swirl of feelings dizzied me, going from I hate him to I missed him. From where is he? to I think I could find him if I tried.

But I don’t know how that would land on Aang, Katara, and Sokka.

Zuko’s been terrorizing them since Aang came out of the ice, before they crossed paths with Jet and me. I’m not even sure how they feel about my past with their first enemy. I’ll make a note to ask later.

I’ve been in my head the entire time we went through the cave of two lovers. I think some badger moles got us out and the nomads went their own way once we made it through.

Apparently, we’re heading to Omashu so Aang can learn earth-bending from his old friend, King Bumi.

Sokka’s catching me up to speed, but his voice sounds like it could be a thousand miles away from my mind. “It’s pretty cool, I didn’t really like being trapped and thinking I was going to die but that’s not the point- Hey, are you okay?” He grabs my elbow and stops us in our tracks. His eyes look into mine, looking for me.

He shares a glance with Katara that prompts her to say, “Let's take a break from walking, guys. Aang, c'mon I think I see some water. I want to see what you know before you become an earth-bender.”

“Okay!” The young Avatar replies, eager for alone time with his favorite person. They smile at me before leaving, and I feel left out of a certain loop.

Once they’re far away enough, I reply to Sokka’s question. “I’m okay, why?”

“You’ve just been off… since the invasion.” He scratches the back of his neck as he confesses his concerns.

“It was a lot, I mean. Yue—”

“I know, but you’ve pulled away from all of us.” Almost shyly, he continues, “From me.”

“Oh.”

“But we all want to know if you’re okay.” He hurries to add.

“I’ve been thinking about some stuff is all.” I let out a sigh, a poor attempt at trying to let go of what’s bothering me. “I just hadn’t seen him in a long time. And when I do, he’s fighting me.” I look down at my boots, begging for the dry dirt to become quicksand. My cheeks are getting hot and the familiar knot in my throat is forming. This is why I didn’t want to talk about it.

“Yeah, he does that.” Sokka scoffs. “He’s a jerk. He can be mean to us, I get it! The Avatar and everything. But being mean to you was unnecessary.”

The knot in my throat quickly forms into a tone that’s harsher than I mean it. “Was it?” Sokka’s taken aback and instantly, I’m regretful for it. “Sorry… I don’t know what I feel.”

I investigate his icy stare and for the first time, I feel the distance I’ve put between us. Unfortunately, I think it’s there to stay.

He raises his hands in defense, “I get it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Did you like him?” I finally understand what he’s been saying. Why he wanted to talk. He wanted to talk about us and how Zuko fits into that equation.

“No—I… uh...” the words leave me.

“I see.”

"That's not a confession."

"Then say no."

“Does it matter?” I ask, becoming irritated with his attitude.

“Does it?” Sokka’s stern voice rarely makes an appearance, but when it does, it surprises me. Leave it to Zuko to cause an argument when he’s not even here.

Before I can answer, Katara and Aang return, looking chippier than we do.

“Break’s over?” she asks us, furrowing her brows as she takes in our body language.

“Yeah, it’s over.” Sokka huffs and walks away, leading us to our destination.

☆

With Sokka guiding us, he proudly gestures towards the Earth Kingdom land. “Ladies and gentlemen, the city of Omashu!” When I finally intake what they’ve all been talking about, I know what we see isn’t what they were describing.

“Oh no.” Aang says for all of us.

The fire emblems are too loud to ignore. Omashu’s been occupied.

☆

As the four of us stand in our fight mode, ready to negotiate Bumi for the Mayor’s baby boy, I see three girls in the distance. I see her first.

My heart drops down to my core, the way it did when I first saw Zuko after all these years. Just when I thought the reunions were over, the universe shows me exactly what it is I ran away from. Finally, after all this time, I have to face what I did.

“No.” I mumble.

“What?” Aang asks. They all turn to me. Now that they know who I am, they know I must know whoever is coming to negotiate on the empire’s behalf.

I should have known it would be Mai, but her little brother was not born when I last saw her. When we all went to the Royal Fire Academy for Girls.

I don’t have enough time to warn them, you never do when she’s involved.

“It’s Azula.”

------------------------------

tag list <3: @camilleverreault @staygoldsquatchling02

50 notes · View notes

mrslankyman · 1 year ago

Text

New Years Kiss

Mike Schmidt x (fem) reader

->1.1k words

Music blared through the house. Your friend had decided to throw a party. You honestly didn’t care to be there.

New years around all these people didn’t feel like a good start to your 2000 journey. Why did it have to be so crowded.

You barely knew anyone at the party. Maybe the alcohol was the reason for everyone getting along. It loosened you up. Made you feel like you belonged. Perhaps you should drink. Maybe it help you.

You walked down the small hallway to the kitchen. Passing an open doored room. Honestly you wish you didn’t see the make out sesh going on inside. It simply reminded you of how lonely you were.

Going into the new years yet again without anyone. No amount of grapes eaten under the table or red underwear you buy would secure you a man for the next year.

If only life was that easy.

Mike thought the same. Minus the red underwear. He didn’t really know how to spend new years. Till he got invited to this party. Now he stood in the corner of the kitchen. Watching others talk, kiss, and run off to random rooms to do god knows what.

He felt so alone. He didn’t drink he had to drive home. Abby was off at their grandmas for the night. She always wanted to spend new years with her and Mike. This year Mike opped out of going. He wanted to give this party a try.

He regretted it greatly.

No girl came up to him like these other guys. No girl waved or gave him the eye. He saw so many movies of the girls just coming up and kissing the boy she wanted.

He wouldn’t have that luck. He wouldn’t wanna admit it to anyone but a new years kiss was one of his biggest wishes.

To have someone to hold on new years. Know you’d be with them once the clock hit 12. Secure it with a kiss. Like a fairy tale. It felt like a dream.

Which it was. As Mike knew he was not really desirable. A 25 year old man raising his sister and struggling to make ends meet. Who’d wanna be around that?

You walked into the kitchen. Looking up at the man who stood in the corner. He held a can of Pepsi. Not beer. Which was shocking. You also didn’t drink tonight.

You simply walked up to the small plate of appetizers. Grabbing some grapes. The man chuckled a little.

“Gonna sit under the table and eat them?” His voice sounded teasing but as you looked up his eyes didn’t display the same emotion. He looked tired, worn out but.. some what attractive.

Your face flushed as he had caught on to what you were gonna do. “Yeah. It’s stupid but.. I kinda want to find someone next year.” You looked down at the grapes. 12 in your hand. It had to work.. didn’t it?

He walked closer to you and grabbed 12 him self. “Okay, I’ll give it a try too. I’m wanting to find someone as well. This years been too lonely. Besides 2000 doesn’t sound like a bad year.” He looked at you. you smiled and nodded. He was about the same height as you. Which was cute. Not too tall.. but not terribly short.

“It’s only 11 we can talk under the table if you want.” He nodded towards the kitchen table. You nodded in agreement and headed over to the kitchen table. You both crawled under.

Mike pulled the chairs to cover you two under the table. It sorta felt like just you two were at the house. Besides the music and the sound of people talking.

“I’m Mike by the way.” His eyes flicked up to you. Displaying some new emotion. He seemed intrigued to know you.

“I’m Y/N..” You smiled and looked down at your grapes. “Rough year too?” You asked him not looking up.

“Yeah. Pretty rough. I hope this one’s better. Raising my sister is tough. I’ve never had kids. So.. I’m just praying I’m doing it right.” He sighed and looked down.

Your heart ached. This man seemed so sweet. At least from what he gave off. He seemed like he was caring. Even if his eyes looked dead and tired.

“I’m sure you’ll have a good year. It’s nice you’re there for your sister. I’m sure she appreciates it.” You nudge him gently. Wanting to lighten the mood a little. He chuckled as he looked at the ground shrugging his shoulders.

“I hope she does..” his voice dropped again. You frowned and looked over at him. His shoulders slumped, eyes down and lips in a thin line. He didn’t even seem excited for the new years.

But were you even excited? Every year came with the hopes of something new with the ending of nothing.

You both sat in silence for a few minutes. Though you just met him something pulled you to him. He could say the same for you. Despite coming off as not excited. He quite liked your company. He stared at the floor.

Not because he was awkward , or didn’t wanna talk, but because he wanted to make the perfect conversation. He combed over every possibility. He wanted to talk to you.

You were the first girl at the party to even pay him any attention. For the most part you were the only girl to give him this much attention.

So once he picked the topic it was just a long conversation. He talked about his sister, you talked about your work, he talked about his Aunt Jane and how he disliked her, you talked about how you wished for something great in life.

in a short time you two got to know each. All before the clock hit 11:59.

You learned that Mike longed for a new years kiss once. You told him how you longed for someone to go into the new years with.

And once that clock hit 11:59 you went to the grapes.

You both smiled and popped the grapes in your mouths. Trying to get all 11 in before 12.

Once the clock hit 12 and everyone else shouted happy new years. You and Mike got to your last grape. You stared at him happily. You had done it. You ate all 12 grapes before 12:01.

“We did i-“ Mike was cut off by you leaning in. Pressing a kiss to his lips. He tasted like the grapes. With a mix of Pepsi. He quickly kissed back. His body felt a surge of electric. He didn’t suspect this.

He didn’t realize how tentivly you listened to him as he spoke of his wish. He pulled you closer. Deepening the kiss. Maybe he just met you. Maybe you just met him.

But you had a whole year to get to know each other now.

Maybe the grapes did work.

#fnaf movie #fnaf #mike schimdt x reader #mike schmidt #fnaf fanfic #josh hutcherson #new year

193 notes · View notes

koostattoos · 1 year ago

Text

➳ There’s Only Me When There’s You || j.jk

~ Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

~ Genre: slight enemies to lovers, high school au, fluff, MAJOR angst, first love, young love (Inspired by 2000's film A Walk to Remember by Nicholas Sparks)

~ Summary: Being new was tough. Starting out in a new school and new town without any idea where to go or any friends was tougher. When coming across Jungkook and his friends, school hadn't got any easier. When you get paired with Jungkook for a project your life becomes hell, or was it heaven?

~ Warnings: MAJOR character death, a fight happens, mentions of a hospital, mentions of blood, fluff, fluff, fluff! 190811!jungkook (iykyk), they’re so incredibly adorable i’m crying, use of petnames (mostly baby)

~ teaser word count: 684

full fic here!

This past summer your family moved to a new city. Yongsan was small, that’s what you liked about it. But your family wanted to get away from the big bustling city of Seoul. They thought it’d be better for you. Moving was exciting to you. Being in a new place and all. The house they had bought was small, it had two bedrooms, with a bathroom, and a big enough living space for the three of you.

The people in the neighborhood were nice. They welcomed you with fresh food and some plants to plant in the mini greenhouse next to the yard. It was very thoughtful of them. Tomorrow is your first day at your new school. You were going into your senior year. They say it’s supposed to be one of the most exciting times in high school.

After you finish unpacking your things you walk into the living room where your dad was sitting. He was on the phone talking with the moving people to figure out where the rest of your stuff was. And your mom was in the kitchen preparing dinner. You decide to take yourself out of the house and explore the small town you now call home.

Making sure your parents knew where you were, you turn your head around the corner of the kitchen and call for your mom.

“I’m gonna go out and look around town, is that okay?”

“Yeah, sure. Just be careful. Don’t go too far and be back before the sun goes down.” she tells you

Nodding your head, you turn to put your shoes on and make sure you have your phone with you. The air outside was nice. It was still mid-summer but the weather around this time seemed to cool down.

When you walk into the village you meet a lot of nice people. Mrs. Kim was the first person you met. “Hi honey. Are you new around here? I don’t think I’ve ever seen your face around here”. She ran one of the local restaurants.

“No, I’ve actually moved here a few days ago. My family and I live nearby. I just wanted to come in and see what was around here. So, I know somewhat my way around.” you explain to her. She nods her head and gasps as an idea pops up into her head.

“Well, if you ever need anything, please stop by. I’ll be glad to help” she says to you with a sweet smile.

“Thank you, Mrs. Kim. I’ll keep that in mind. Have a good night” you smile at her and walk away to explore more of the village. There wasn’t much to do. There were a few bookstores you had walked past and a few other markets. Deciding to head back home you text your mom that you were on your way. Without looking at where you were going you bumped into a firm chest. When you look up, you’re met with a teenage boy. His hair was a bit of a mess but still maintained. He was actually rather cute.

Before you could say anything, he says, “Are you okay?” you pause for a minute trying to collect your thoughts. He looks blankly at you waiting for you to respond. Finally, after staring at him for what felt like an eternity, you answer him. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m sorry for bumping into you” you bow your head slightly to him as you apologize.

“It’s alright. Are you new around here? I don’t think I’ve seen you before” you respond the same way you answered to Mrs. Kim. You tell him that you had just moved here a few days ago with your family. He nods his head and excuses himself. But not before he introduces himself.

“I’m Jungkook by the way.” He has a faint smile on his lips. You tell him your name. “It’s nice to meet you, Jungkook” he nodded and slowly started to walk away. “It was nice to meet you too” Finally, you both bid goodbye to each other and you make your way back home.

#jungkook #bts jungkook #bts #jeon jungkook #jungkook fluff #jungkook smut #jungkook angst #jungkook fanfic #jungkook oneshot

163 notes · View notes

interstellarsystem · 6 months ago

Text

Waking Up After 10 Years of Dormancy – Identity, Grief, and Change

Long post ahead. This is a recount of my experiences as a headmate who was present in childhood, and then went dormant before waking up again in our 20s. There will be discussion of grief and dormancy in here, and mentions of abuse and headmate death without going into detail.

This is partially for the alterhumanovember / alterhuman writing challenge, and partially to get all of my thoughts out.

I’m Dain, a member of my system that all of the others never knew existed. I was here during childhood, though the exact year I came into existence is unknown, we think I became alive around 2008-2009. I lived alongside others sharing my body for years–maybe even up until 2014-2015. I fell into dormancy around then, and the current system had no idea I ever existed, as when I went to sleep, I took a lot of memories with me.

I don’t remember many of the others I shared time with, just that there was one we considered “the child”, what we would now call the original. I now know there was a switch between the original child and a new headmate, Archie, who isn’t the same person–but I’ll refer to them collectively as “the child” from now on, as my perspective was at the time.

We–the others in the body–were there, living alongside the child, and I was protecting them along the way. I don’t remember fronting often, moreso… Silently observing, unable to move the body or communicate with them, but still there. Like a background process on a device. If emotions got high enough, I found myself in full control of the body, and I could get us out of whatever situation we had gotten ourselves into. Bullies at school, abusive figures in our lives be it parents or teachers, and other general stress–that was my battle to fight. I was the anger stored up behind the child’s fear, ready to lash out if needed.

As we got older, I started taking control less and less–not because we stopped needing me, but because the child had closed themselves off. They stopped allowing themselves to feel as deeply, and I was triggered into the front a lot less. Nowadays, I’d be aware it wasn’t a conscious choice, and was heavy dissociation, but back then I didn’t know. Some of the others–namely, the Pokemon I also shared the body with–had disappeared since our parents and friends were belittling us for still having “imaginary friends”. The child never spoke of me to anyone though, if they even knew I was there. So I think I only remained a little longer because of that. I’m not sure when I fell into dormancy, or if there was something that triggered it, or simply a gradual slip into sleep.

I woke up, though. At the end of last month, some others in our system had been looking at my source material. Deltora Quest, an anime based on an Australian authors novel–niche, mostly known to those who grew up in the time to watch it air on TV, or had ever picked up the books. We were looking at it again with our partner system, because we remembered it had been a huge special interest of ours as a kid, and had finally gotten around to watching more of it. Something about rekindling the interest woke me, and I was suddenly in the body again.

It, to me, was like I blinked. A foggy memory of being a child, still stressed about school, parents, and whatever else–and then a blink–and then, here. In a body I didn’t recognise, in a house I’d never been in, sharing control of the body with people I had never in my life met before. I still had all those memories of trauma, hurt and fear from before–and they all surfaced at the same time with me. I instantly panicked. After explaining where I was, Xeros, the person in cofront with me, told me that writing out everything coming into my brain could help us all organise and piece it together later. I did what it said, and wrote well over 2000 words before my thoughts slowed down a little bit–enough to actually focus. I called our partner system, calmed down after processing a bit more, and then got into bed to sleep off the residual panic.

It’s definitely taken a long while to come to terms with it. Effectively, I was in a coma for around 10 years, and the whole world moved on without me. I wasn’t in contact with any friends I remembered from before except one–who had changed a lot in the time that passed. I didn’t live where I remembered. Our siblings were so much older, as were our parents. We dropped out of school (though we’d be well past finished it by now). We got diagnosed with a whole bunch of things. We came out as transgender and are essentially completely socially transitioned and looking into HRT–even our parents know. And they know about our system too! Almost everything–if not absolutely everything–I knew before had changed in the blink of an eye. It absolutely shook me, to have my entire world uprooted and rearranged into something I couldn’t recognise as being something I have any part in.

I felt an intrinsic heartache and felt full-blown grief over a life that, in my own experience, was “lost” through the irreparable change of time. There was no way of going back, no way of gaining back my lost years, and no way of bringing people I was close to back in contact with us or out of internal dormancy aside from sheer chance. We hadn’t died, but I had effectively died for years, and came back to a world that just… Kept moving. I mean, of course it would–the earth doesn’t stop for a single fragmented piece of trauma stored in the recesses of someone's mind. But coming back and not recognising anything or almost anyone around you… It was horrible. The sensation of loss was immense. I felt that I’d “failed” by going dormant, and learning that the child was no longer a part of the system. I felt that my entire purpose had fell through, and I was brought back for… No reason at all.

But… It’s not all bad. Far from it. The child may be gone, but our body isn’t. We’re not doomed to fail at life, as we thought back when I first existed. We’re volunteering and looking into getting an actual job, we have a stable group of friends, a loving partner system, and are on the road to moving out and getting some much needed time away from our home situation. Life isn’t horrible, and while it moved on without me, it moved in ways that were both bad and good. I don’t actually despise being here, even if I might have in the day or so after I woke up. The new group of people I share the body with is supportive, and I’ve already gotten closer to some of them. We’ve made real progress in the time I was gone, even if it all feels uncanny overall. I have a different mindset to what I had when I first woke up–I didn’t fail, I kept us going when we needed it back then. I didn’t give up, and there’s no way of telling where we’d be now if I never was there in the first place. Things are… good.

Though… I’ve got some confusing things within my own identity going on, since I woke up. Before, I was simply a fictive of Dain from Deltora Quest. Nothing much else to it, really. The child’s brain latched onto him as a strong character and implemented me into the system as a protective measure against outside forces. It all makes sense. But now? I feel like since I’ve been back, I’ve become a multifictive. Some part of me now is Tomura Shigaraki from My Hero Academia–something we’ve also been watching through, around the same time we got back into DQ.

It confuses me, in some ways. Makes sense in others. A lot of my mannerisms have changed to be slightly to-the-left of what I was before… Which does happen to lean me more toward acting like him. I questioned it without much deeper thought for a week or so, but found myself saying and doing more and more things that lined up with how he is. I suggested that I was a multifictive to our partner system, and on their second guess (and mind you, their first was a joke guess) of which character I could possibly be, they got it right. I acted enough like him to the point that others could see it, without even any hints. But it’s hard to tell where this came from.

See, I feel like if I wanted to, I could call myself a median subsystem. Others can tell which of my two fictive identities I’m leaning closer to at any given time–my voice, speech patterns and general attitude are instant giveaways. We don’t argue with each other, and the lines between Dain and Shigaraki–if there even are any–are so blurred they’re impossible to define. We can’t talk to each other, and we don’t feel a switch between us. But it’s so obvious that there’s two people, two whole identities, within what I call me. It’s incredibly confusing to think about the possible origin of how I came to be so… Fragmented within myself.

Am I the result of a new headmate that was forming (Shigaraki) getting stuck to whatever remained of the original Dain after he went dormant? Am I the original Dain with a new identity just sort of.. Added onto him? Am I two fully formed headmates put into one as a median entity for some reason? Does it even have a proper explanation that I could come to a concrete conclusion on? Well, no. Like most things that operate within systems, concrete explanations are hard to come by. My origin of why I am who I am now doesn’t matter, in the grand scheme of things, but I still feel the drive to know why I was changed by the time I woke up.

Overall? Life is confusing. Waking up has been a shock, but honestly, I’m glad I did. I’m glad I get to have a second run in this body, with new and kinder people than before to support each other. I’m still working a lot of stuff out, and I’m sure I will be for a long while after this. But… I’m here again, and it’s been a pleasure becoming a part of our new life.

25 notes · View notes

pedrostylez · 2 years ago

Text

Something Else-Pt. 1

pairing: Frankie Morales x fem!reader

chapter summary: You're dragged out to a night at the bar by your friend Anna, remeeting her boyfriend and his friends. But this time, they've brought another friend that you're pretty sure they are trying to set you up with

rating: 18+ (no minors please)

word count: 3.9k

warnings etc: Frankie w/o a daughter, triple frontier movie plot has happened but is not mentioned as of yet, eventual smut (not this chapter but it will build), fluff, pet names, friendships, jealousy, competition, drinking, 2nd person pov, no use of y/n

A/N: Hi there! I'm very excited to be putting this story out there that I have been thinking about for a while but wasn't willing to write down until I had more of a plan and some organization. I am not at the point where I know how many parts it will be, BUT fun things are planned regardless. Let me know what you think :)

Anna is your prettiest friend. To be honest, you envied her, always pulling guys that you silently had your eye on, confidently going through life without a care in the world. She was talented that way and unintentionally attracted everyone around her to her realm. You wished you could be like her in some ways.

You loved her like a sibling and wanted nothing but to make her happy; except to maybe go to the bar with her tonight. “Please, honey? Santi is bringing a couple friends.” She whined, looking at you through the mirror as she was applying the last of her lip gloss. Her dress was tight-tighter than you had ever seen her in before, pink and ruched over her abdomen like she stepped right out of the 2000s. You had never really thought about wearing a dress like that.

You sighed heavily, adjusting the shirt that you had already put on for the occasion to cover your belly button. You were willing a couple hours ago, but as it got later you started to think it wasn’t worth it anymore. The way your bra dug into your side, the way your underwear was never really in the right place so that it didn’t show lines under your jeans made you want to take it all off-and seeing her dressed the way she was made you feel inadequate. “If we don’t leave in the next 10 minutes I’m bailing. I want to be in my pajamas and eating popcorn, not…standing around watching you make out with your boyfriend.”

Anna tried to hide her smile in the mirror, but you knew she was satisfied, standing up and fluffing her hair once more before grabbing her purse. She seemed to be on a mission you weren’t privy to yet, and quickly turned around to you. “Perfect, because we are leaving now.”

Holding back the eye roll was a job all on its own.

The prep in the back of the taxi made you more nervous. You had met Santiago before-referred to as Pope by his buddies Will and Benny. It had been at this same bar you were going to that you had first met Santiago, and had given him a strained smile before leaving and not seeing him again for months. It was not lost on you how many times Anna had suggested going out again, wanting to reminisce or some shit at this same place. It was always a hard pass.

Something about the bar you were heading to was going to make you dizzy. Maybe it was the way it used to be a dance hall, and the sweat of past people lingered in your nose, or maybe it was how it was too dark, even with the strobing lights. But being prepped for it in the back of the taxi made you want to hurl. “It will be Santi, Will, Benny and they are bringing Frankie,” Anna says nonchalantly, staring down at her phone and typing out a text message.

“Who’s Frankie?” You asked quietly, looking out the window as the taxi slowed down at the red light just before the bar. There was a line out the door and standing and waiting to go in made you want to get out now and start walking back.

“He has come the past couple of times, but he was on the same team as Santi.” Anna brushes off, looking down at her phone again before smiling like a giddy child-must be Santi on the other end.

The same team. Great.

It was nothing against Will and Benny, but they were…characters. All three of them, Santi, Will, and Benny together were overwhelming. Benny and Will were polite, kind and would speak to you while Santi and Anna were all over each other, but they had their sights on other people. Not that you wanted to be with them-the brothers were intimidating. Will had given you the most amount of attention for a couple of times you had been dragged along, but it wasn’t interesting to you. And that is what you assumed Frankie would be. Friend groups that were formed in the military and called themselves a team seemed like a disaster.

Stepping out of the taxi and onto the sidewalk was simple enough, especially when Anna squealed and started running toward Santi. His arms were open, smiling, and ready to catch her as she launched herself into his arms. Adjusting your shirt again to cover your stomach, plastering a smile onto your face, and greeting Will when he gives you a wave. His arm is quick to get around your shoulder and drag you forward, a one-sided hug squeezed into you. “You tagging along tonight?” He asks quietly, looking down at you.

“Yeah, figured I would try to be fun for once. But Anna only got me here after I threatened to stay home if she took too much longer.” You laugh out, looking up to Will and over to Benny. You see a baseball cap just behind him, who you assume to be Frankie.

“This is Frankie!” Anna screeches, scrambling out of Santiago’s grip to grab onto Frankie’s arm. She motions over to you and introduces you to him, smiling widely.

The men around you are silent, watching you and Frankie smile politely at each other. This suddenly feels…planned. “They drag you here too?” You ask quietly, watching a blush creep up his cheeks as he takes a hand out of his pocket and scratches the back of his neck.

You feel Will push you forward, letting go of your shoulder and nonchalantly pick up a conversation with Benny. Anna is still watching on, smiling and giddy and you just know this was her idea. “Uh, yeah. They said it was fun.” Frankie says just as quietly, clearing his throat and looking over at Anna puzzled.

Santiago swoops in, grabbing Anna around the waist and lifting her off her feet. “Let’s go, gang, the bouncer knows us.”

You look at Frankie knowingly, patting his arm and stepping in front of him to trail behind Anna. This seemed like it was going to be a longer night than you had originally intended, but at least you weren’t the quietest of the group. You miss the look that Will gives Frankie once you’ve stepped in front, and how Frankie pushes Will out of his way to trail behind you.

Frankie had not wanted to go out. Will had hit him up with a “wanna get laid tonight?” and Frankie had rolled his eyes. He was not in the mood to deal with Will’s antics.

But when Pope called him shortly after, said he was bringing his girl and one of her friends, that she wasn’t interested in Will or Benny but that Frankie would be perfect to get her to be less uptight…Frankie sighed and said sure.

This always seemed to happen. The boys would set him up with some girl that none of them liked so that they could pursue other options. Frankie didn’t mind-he rarely slept with them, and the girls were always beautiful. They were just never his type. Frankie was used to being the babysitter of the group.

Standing around and waiting outside the bar made him anxious for some reason. He had never been to this bar and was being coached by Benny on how you acted. “She’s tough. She gives no leeway. Will tried to swoop in with her twice now and both times she has just left. She buys her own drinks too, don’t even bother.”

It piqued Frankie’s interest that Will had gone after you and you had turned him down. Maybe this wasn’t going to be a babysitting scenario.

When you stepped out of the taxi completely calm, watching Anna beeline it for Santi, Frankie slid behind Benny. You were, in fact, gorgeous. And the way you smiled at Will didn’t convince Frankie that he was totally off limits. The way your hair slid over your shoulder as you looked up at Will; the small smile you graced him with made Frankie want to melt into a puddle. There was no way he would be able to carry a conversation with you.

And then you spoke to him so softly. “They drag you here too?” As if you didn’t dress for the part, or look like you were meant to be dancing in a club. And the way you touched his arm as you passed him had him frozen in place, eyeing Will with that knowing look. They set him up and he wasn’t sure he was mad about it anymore.

An hour had gone by and you were people watching from the bar. Will and Frankie were behind you as you spoke to Benny. “Don’t you think I can go home yet?” You whined, dizzy from the tequila shots that Will had supposedly bought for Anna, and forgot that she didn’t drink tequila. A rum and coke sat in your hand, swirling the ice and taking another sip. You were feeling warm, sweat on your hairline that made you wish you had brought a hair tie.

“Why would you go home now?” Will yelled in your ear, sweaty hand touching your shoulder to get you to turn around. You spun too quickly, feeling Will’s hand tighten around you for an instant to make sure you were okay, smiling at him as a silent thanks. You locked eyes with Frankie for a moment, his stare burning into your skin.

“You guys are boring.” You smiled sweetly, laughing when Will scoffed and bumped Frankie in the shoulder.

“Can you believe that? She says we’re boring.” He yells again.

You reach up to your ear and rub at your jaw, the sound of the bass hurting your inner ear. You glance over to the outside deck area that is relatively unoccupied and has an exit stair to the sidewalk below for quick escapes. It’s tempting to slowly make your way over there, maybe make a run for it and hail a cab before anyone notices. Anna wouldn’t be too mad-it’s not the first time you’ve just left after giving it an hour's chance? You glance back to where Will has removed himself, bopping into a circle of dancing girls, and see Frankie sliding up the bar to you. His arm is warm against yours, the smell of his cologne tickling at your nose. Citrus? He leans in to say something, but you can’t hear him.

You shake your head and tap at your ear again, crinkling up your face as a sorry. He pauses and looks to be debating something before grabbing your hand, motioning for the outside deck. His hand in yours feels rough but gentle, a quick squeeze to hold your attention. You nod, smiling at him for reading your mind.

You can’t help but notice how broad his shoulders are as you trail behind him, his hand still holding on to your hand to lead you to the deck. His shirt is tight across his arms, his small nod to excuse himself through the crowd before he turns around to check on you. When he opens the door for you to step out ahead of him, the sound immediately drops away into the sound of cars passing by. “Oh, thank god.”

“It’s too loud in there to have a conversation,” Frankie says with a small chuckle, shutting the door behind him and taking a sip of his beer. He stares at you for a moment, unsure what to say next.

“Easier to escape too.” You sigh, sitting on one of the stools and looking at him. It’s the first time you’ve been able to actually look at Frankie straight on. His shoulders are screaming to be out of his shirt, and his hair is curling at the edges of his cap sitting firmly on his head. It could be the alcohol currently in your system, but you want to reach out and touch one of them.

He takes a step over to the stool next to yours, bumping your arm gently before looking out onto the street below. “I tried asking in there if you had been to this bar before?” He sounds nervous, and you plaster on a smile to ease his tension.

You nodded along, sipping again on your rum and coke. “Yeah. Anna said you had come along the past couple of times?”

Frankie’s eyebrows furrow, looking over at you and then blushing. “I uh…I’ve not been here before, no.” He laughs, taking another sip of his drink. “This is the first time I’ve met Anna, actually.”

You tilt your head at him, curious about his answer. “You’ve never met her before?”

When he shakes his head no, your brain takes longer to catch up than usual. But looking back into the bar and seeing Will, Benny, and Anna all looking back at you, scrambling away from the window, tells you that it was all a ploy. “We were set up, it seems.” You mumble, slightly annoyed.

Of course, Anna was setting you up with a complete stranger. Sure, Frankie was cute but you didn’t know anything about him beyond his broad shoulders and his blush. Why did she assume you couldn’t take care of yourself? You turn back to him after sipping down the rest of your drink. “Sorry, they dragged you into this.”

Frankie’s laugh relaxes your annoyed expression, his eyes bright with humor. “Don’t worry about it.” He sighs and faces you again. “Benny was telling me that you’ve turned him and Will down twice.”

You scoff, finishing off your drink. “They haven’t asked!” You exclaim, smiling when he chuckles. “Both times I’ve met them they have walked off to talk to other girls.”

“Did you want them to talk to you? Will seems pretty interested.” Frankie amends, motioning to the window again where you can see Will grinding on some girl, Benny shaking his head at the bar at his brother in slight disgust. “Well…not when he’s doing that.”

You laugh, hiccupping at the end before facing Frankie and shaking your head. “Maybe I’m just tipsy, but he’s kinda boring.” You admit, shrugging. “And if they think they’ve tried and I’ve not noticed then I’m not sure it would work out anyways.”

Frankie hums, setting his beer down. “What makes you notice? When someone is trying, I mean.” He says quietly, his hand laying on the bartop between you, fingers outstretched casually in your direction.

You shrug, clicking your tongue. “I think that’s hard to pinpoint. I guess I have to want the attention too.” You admit. Curiosity gets the better of you and you look at him again. “What do you do to show you’re interested?”

Frankie doesn’t move, squinting his eyes slightly before tipping his head back and forth. “Depends. I’m not…not usually very loud about my intentions. Not dancing up on someone,” He motions to where Will is still grinding, now with another girl. “But I like having private conversations. Seeing what someone is like.”

Your eyes trail down Frankie’s neck as he’s talking, his neck muscles moving as he motions to the rest of the bar, the way he’s leaning. When he stops, you look back up to his eyes to see this quiet smirk gracing his face, as if he caught you checking him out. “What am I like?”

He smiles fully, teeth white under his plush lips before he shakes his head. “Well, you’re…something else. I haven’t figured you out yet.”

You hum, tapping your finger on the bartop before coming to the conclusion that you do want to leave, but want some company. “Would you want to walk me home to find out more?”

It’s like Frankie is frozen, unsure of what move to make. You’re suddenly worried that you shouldn’t have said anything, shouldn’t have offered and you’re about to take it back when he says “Of course.”

Frankie is really nervous. Like, he’s not sure if he should have offered to walk you home-not because he doesn’t want to, but because he thinks he is going to make a right fool of himself on this walk, no matter how many shots you’ve had.

You’re swaying as you walk, bumping into him every once in a while and giggling when you do. He wants to wrap his arm around your shoulder like how Will did when he first greeted you, but he doesn’t want to overstep your boundaries. He mumbles out a “careful" with a chuckle after the third time, making you blush bright red. “It’s alright, cariño. Do you need my help?”

You nod at him and wrap your arm around his middle, leaning your head against his chest and allowing one of his arms to wrap around your shoulders. “This is embarrassing. I was fine at the bar.” You mumble out, your jean-covered leg rubbing against the side of his as you both take steps.

“It’s alright. You just direct me to where you want to go.” Frankie smiles, rubbing his hand up and down your exposed arm to bring some warmth to you. You feel good under his arm, wondering briefly how far away you live.

His phone in his pocket vibrates, and he pulls it out to see a text from Benny.

You dirty dog

Frankie rolls his eyes and shoves it back in, continuing on your trek down the sidewalk. “How far do you live from here?”

“Only a couple blocks, I swear.” You say quickly, snapping your head up to him with wide eyes. “I’m sorry, is this too long of a walk?” You hiccup, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk with him.

Frankie can’t help but laugh, rubbing his hand up your arm again and giving you a squeeze. “No, it’s okay.”

You nod along, allowing him to get you moving again. The streets are familiar, and the cool air is helping you be less dizzy. When you finally arrive at your front stoop, you reach in your pocket for your keys that you swear were there. Frankie watches you with a critical eye, wondering what you’re fumbling for. “I…can’t find my keys.”

Frankie stands there while you continue to look, reaching into every pocket again and then searching through your purse. He hides his smirk when you shove your purse at him for him to dig through, coming up with nothing more than a pack of gum and a few extra pens you are carrying around. “What do you want to do then, cariño?”

The sight of you biting your lip has Frankie let out a big huff that you interpret as him being annoyed. “I’m so sorry, I uh…I don’t know what to do.” Your eyes are filling with tears quicker than he realized, his worry getting the better of him as he brings his hands to your shoulders.

“Hey, it’s okay. I’ll text Pope to ask if Anna has your key.” Frankie says quietly, moving the hair that has fallen in your face out of your eyes and behind your ear, pulling you to him to support you. “It’s alright, don’t worry.”

You nod solemnly, laughing at yourself briefly. “I don’t typically act like this, I swear.” You sniffle, pulling away slightly and smiling. “I wanted to stay home tonight and watch a movie but Anna had insisted–”

“Don’t worry.” Frankie amends again, bringing his palm to your cheek and feeling how you lean into him. He’s taking a chance, but he wants to spend more time with you. “Do you want to go to my place and watch a movie? That way we don’t have to wait for Pope?”

Your eyes are glazed over as you stare at him, contemplating what he has said. “Yeah…okay. I think that’s okay.”

Frankie is just so nice. You had never really come across someone that was just so plainly a good person. Sure, you were sure Will, Benny, and Santiago would have offered for you to go to their place and crash on their couch too, but they had met you a few times.

Frankie just met you and is giving you an extra shirt and pair of sweatpants and has already told your friend where you are. He’s turned on his TV and set it up to automatically turn off after a few hours, and he’s sitting on the other end of the couch with his hat still on, his jeans changed for matching sweatpants and is intent on staring at the screen. He’s set a pillow and a fluffy blanket on the coffee table in front of you both, enticingly soft looking.

You were able to look at your phone and see that Anna had messaged you multiple emojis that held innuendos, but you’ve been unable to answer with a definitive of whether or not those emojis would even be accurate in the morning. You glance over to Frankie as he adjusts his leg, eyes locking with his briefly which makes him blush. “You uh…you’re very polite.”

Frankie lets out a quick chuckle at that. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

You nod, a smile barely raising before a yawn escapes and you lean farther back into Frankie’s couch. The leather is warm under your fingers, sagging with you as you lean back and enveloping you in its warmth. You close your eyes, feeling the alcohol still move through your bloodstream like it is on a mission to keep you drunk. You faintly hear the TV, not thinking much about it before nodding off fully.

You vaguely wake up when you feel calloused hands on your shoulder, mumbling incoherently. “Cariño? Do you need help?”

You think this is a strange question until you open your eyes, seeing Frankie in front of you without his baseball cap on, and a small smile. “What?”

Frankie brings a hand up to your cheek, his thumbs coming up to smooth your eyebrows over and over again in a soothing motion. “It’s clearly time for bed.” He chuckles out, eyes searching your face before looking back into your heavily lidded eyes. “Do I need to carry you?”

You don’t really understand what he means until he has lifted you over his shoulder, laughing when you grunt out in surprise. You’re being walked through his apartment, the hallway dark, and the TV light only showing bits and pieces of the living room. He sets you down gently on cool sheets, laying you back and pulling up the covers. “I thought I was sleeping on the couch.” You say quietly, looking up at Frankie again.

He pauses for only a moment before pulling the blankets higher, up to your chin. “I wouldn’t dream of it.” He scoffs, pushing the hair on your forehead away again before giving you a final smile. “The bathroom is just across the hall.”

Frankie shut off the lights on his way out the door and turned to see you had already shut your eyes again, mouth falling open as it had on his couch when he had turned to see your reaction to the joke on the screen and found you asleep.

He releases a sigh as he sits down on the couch again, reaching for his pillow and blanket that he set out and arranging himself to continue to watch what was mindlessly playing. He can’t stop thinking about how you leaned into him when he would touch your face, or how you began tearing up when you thought he would be upset with you.

His eyes begin to droop, wondering what made you think he would react differently, and hoping you would let him show you otherwise.

tagging @meveispunk because she wanted to know when this would be posted :) if anyone else wants to be part of the updates just shoot me a message!

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal fanfiction #frankie morales #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales fluff #frankie catfish morales #frankie morales fanfic #triple frontier #triple frontier fic #something else

269 notes · View notes

officialchristiancagebbgirlblog · 1 year ago

Note

Can I have prompts 15, 34, and 69 with early 2000's Edge plss where she is scared to be in love with them because of trust issues but sweet smut unfolds as they let the feelings out between them?

15: “I’m so scared…of you”

34: “shh it’s okay, I’m here now”

69: having your first time in bed with each other

Tag: @judgementdaysunshine

Word count: 2058

Warnings: mild swearing

Fic type: fluff and smut

Link to masterlist

Reader will be a wrestler, 2001. Will use Adam’s name. Feels silly saying Edge in this context. Christian will just be called Christian as using his real name doesn’t feel right for fics!

Being at large events was always difficult for you. Even if you did know most of the people there. You were still relatively new, only having been there for about three years about the same time as your friends, Adam and Christian. The three of you didn’t go in together. You had met them on your first day actually and hit it off with them immediately. They always had your back both within matches, and backstage. Being quiet made you an easy target for certain wrestlers to pick on you; they’d pull pranks (sometimes cruel ones) on you, be rough with you in the ring. It wasn’t the best time to be a wrestler but you weren’t about to quit. Plus, the two boys would back you up and protect you as much as possible, alongside two other friends, Jeff and Matt Hardy.

The event in question was an after party, following a successful episode of Smackdown. You hung around Adam and Christian who were talking with Kurt Angle and a few others, sticking closely to Adam’s side, while they chatted with other wrestlers. It wasn’t something you admitted to anyone just yet, but you had found yourself with feelings for Adam. There was something about how protective he was over you that just made your heart swoon and your body feel so…safe? Was that the feeling? It was hard to come to terms with how you felt. So many times had you been let down or betrayed by your previous partner that you didn’t know if you could go through with another relationship again. He had broken you in more ways than you’d let on to anyone. The idea of dedicating yourself to someone or letting someone into your heart terrified you.

“We should probably get going!” Adam nudged you, hoping you’d agree. He was enjoying the socialisation but in reality, he felt more comfortable in the idea of heading back to the hotel room you two shared. Saving as much money as possible was at the top of both of your lists so you had agreed to share with him. Tonight would be your first night alone with him, and a big part of you was scared. You nodded, agreeing that it was time.

“I’m going to stay a bit longer,” Christian said, giving you both a quick hug, “but I’ll see you guys later on!”

Exchanging goodbyes with the group, you both headed out to the car park to get a taxi back. Adam left the keys with Christian so he could drive back.

“I think…I might just shower and then sleep when we get back.” You told Adam in the car, sitting a seat away from him in the back, leaving the middle seat free.

“Oh. I was thinking we could watch a film but…yeah sure, if you’re tired, do what you like!” He replied, smiling weakly.

It was a strange response, you had thought. A part of you thought that maybe he was hoping for something more but you didn’t want to jump to conclusions. The rest of the ride was quiet, relaxed. Watching him from the corner of your eye, you made a mental note of the outline of his face from the side. There was no denying that he was gorgeous. With the way his long hair framed his face, the little point at the end of his nose. And his body! His arms were strong yet soft to the touch, very welcoming. Perhaps that’s why she always felt so safe? It definitely was his kindness that helped too. You didn’t realise that you had turned your head to get a better look at him, staring with a sparkle in your eyes. He turned to look at you with a smile and pink cheeks, winking slightly. You quickly looked away in embarrassment of being caught staring, hearing him chuckle at your reaction.

After arriving at the hotel, you both made your way up to the room and you rushed in the bathroom to get to the shower to wash away the naughty thoughts that began to cloud your mind. You got undressed with haste and stood under the warm running water, trying to clear your mind. It was getting harder to hide your feelings and anxiety built up in your chest over that fact. You were terrified of a repeat of last time. Deep down you knew he was different but still. What if he secretly was a terrible man? What if he was secretly just as horrible but was fantastic at hiding it? The thought was too horrible to imagine so you tried to ignore it, washing your body and your hair, imagining you were scrubbing that idea away.

Not spending long in there, you dried off and climbed into clothes that you had left folded in there before you left, ready for your evening shower. You looked into the mirror and took a deep breath, calming yourself so Adam wouldn’t ask any questions. You left the bathroom and made your way over to the desk where your hairdryer was ready for you. Except it wasn’t just that there waiting. Adam stood, holding your brush and motioning for you to sit down.

“I know you’re tired but I can…do this for you if you like?” He smiled sheepishly.

Returning the smile, you sat down in front of him. As he began you felt your cheeks and your body become warm with appreciation, the naughty thoughts coming back. He was so concentrated on making sure your hair was fully dry and brushed that he didn’t even notice you staring this time. After about 15 to 20 minutes, he shut the dryer off, just pulling the brush gently through your smooth and shiny hair.

“Can I ask you a question?” He asked, finally looking up at the mirror to make eye contact with you. Adam noticed the nervous look that suddenly crossed your face, and he took a second to squeeze your shoulder to assure you that it was okay. Swallowing hard, you nodded.

“Um…are we just…friends? Or is there something else that you want to try?” He asked, his voice quiet and soft. You felt your throat run dry as the words settled in your brain. He decided to continue on with something that probably shouldn’t have shocked you all that much but it still did regardless.

“Because I don’t know about you but…I definitely have. Feelings. For you.”

You didn’t know what to say. Well, you did, but you were scared of saying it. Your silence scared Adam as he stood there still looking at you, waiting for you to just say something. Anything.

It felt like an eternity before you opened your mouth to speak to him.

“Adam…I’m not going to lie to you because I appreciate you and…what you do for me.” You started with a deep breath. It wasn’t fair to lie to him on how you felt nor was it fair to not tell him why you were afraid of it.

“I’m so scared…of you-“

“Of me? Why?” He interrupted, the shock breaking his heart in two.

“Let me finish, please.” You begged.

He became silent, placing both hands on your shoulders, letting he brush fall to the floor with a dull thud.

“It’s not…really you. It’s the idea of you, and liking you. I want to let you in but I’m scared of what will happen if I do. The last person I let into my heart treated me terribly. I know you’re not that guy but I don’t know if I can let myself trust someone again. I am so terrified that…it will happen again.”

You felt the tears well up in your eyes, sliding down your cheeks rapidly. Just admitting why you were afraid of love somehow felt worse than keeping it secret. It was the shame of talking about it out loud, and now crying about it. Let alone someone who had just admitted they had feelings for you!

You felt his arms wrap around your shoulders and his cheek rest on the crown of your head, Adam gently whispering ‘shhh’.

“I’m sorry,” you choked out, “I-I know I’m a mess right now and this isn’t what you want to see and I’m sorry I-“

“Shh it’s okay, I’m here now.” He muttered, rocking you side to side.

“I don’t know exactly what happened before in your last relationship,” he gently pulled on your arm to turn you around on the chair to face him, “but I am not him, okay? I need you to understand that. I can love you so much more. In the way you deserve. You just need to let me in to do that.”

He cupped your face, wiping tears away with his thumbs. You both stayed there, gazing into each other's eyes for god knows how long before you both leant towards each other to share a kiss. When your lips met in the middle, your body rushed with tingles as the familiar sensation came back. You hadn’t realised how much you missed kissing!

It wasn’t long before you were standing up in his arms as he led you to the bed, lips still interlocked as you both removed each other's clothes. You both mumbled sweet nothings into each other's soft lips as he pulled your legs apart, aligning himself with your wet and ready entrance.

“Are you ready, baby girl?” He asked, stopping to look at you. You nodded, throwing your arms around his neck as he slowly slid in, keeping his eyes on your face the entire time.

“Tell me if it hurts or if it’s too much. We can stop if you need it.” He reassured, kissing your cheek once he was all the way in. Adam stayed unmoving for a moment to allow you to get used to the feeling of him inside you, not wanting you to be in pain. After signalling to him that it was okay, he began to thrust, being slow and gentle. He buried his face in your neck as the pleasure and your warmth took over his body.

“Faster, please!” You called out to him, gripping his shoulders as the feeling of pleasure overtook your body. Adam picked up the pace while still not hitting too hard, groaning against your skin.

“You’re so gorgeous,” He muttered, littering your skin with small wet kisses as his hands caressed your soft body, “God, I’m so glad I told you…how I feel.”

Just hearing him speak those words sent your heart flying. You had completely forgotten what it felt like to be praised in this way. And to have it from Adam just made it that much sweeter. Already you felt yourself getting close to the finish line, him following behind closely. Wrapping your legs around his waist, you moaned out his name as you drew closer and closer.

“Let it out for me, baby.” He whispered, his lips just barely ghosting the skin of your ear. You gasped as your orgasm hit, Adam holding on to you tight as he continued on with whispering encouraging words of love to you while you rode it out. As you came down, he muttered a quick ‘oh fuck’ before pulling out, cumming on your stomach with a grunt. After finishing, he leant down to give you another kiss before getting up to grab tissues to clean you up.

“Sorry, I didn’t want to…you know…do it inside of you.” He smiled sheepishly, his body pink from the afterglow of sex. You smiled and told him that it was okay, you didn’t mind too much. Once he got you cleaned up, he crawled into the bed next to you and pulled you in for a cuddle.

“I meant what I said earlier, you know.” He said, turned your head to look at him. It had finally set in that Adam just wanted to love you in every way possible. It was still hard to believe that you could be loved that way after before, but you were willing to let him try. Smiling wider, you both shared another kiss, already becoming obsessed with the way you both tasted.

“Let’s give it a try. See where it goes. I…I think I’m ready for you to show me what it’s like to be appreciated again.”

#adam copeland x reader #adam copeland imagine #adam copeland fanfic #adam copeland #edge wwe #rated r superstar #edge x reader #edge imagine #edge fanfic

63 notes · View notes