#i’m still very bitter that i missed this and it’s been like 10 years

[trulymadlydirectioner]

this is the concert i wasn’t allowed to go to because it was on a SCHOOL NIGHT 💔💔💔 so sad there aren’t more videos

new orleans, september 25th

Videos of the show, credit to the owners, i try to get the best quality ones i find and if they’re not linked then i haven’t found one or there is one but its bad quality. 

(there’s literally no videos lol // don’t forget to change the setting on the youtube videos!)

Keep reading

[grace-williams-xo]

RAMBLING THOUGHTS AFTER FINISHING PART TWO. GONNA ADDRESS MY P1 THOUGHTS FIRST. SPOILER WARNING.

1 & 2: I think Debling could’ve worked in the second half, and I’m kinda sad Cressida didn’t get a happy ending. The Creloise fell of a CLIFF after ep 5 but I think it could still be saved

5: no cishet man has ever loved his wife more than Anthony Bridgerton I’m gonna be ill

6 & 12: kanthony’s absence was felt BAD in the finale, I think their reactions to LW were sorely needed. Also Jonny and Simone have both said they’ll be at every sibling’s wedding and stick around for years but they missed Francesca’s??? Also felt their absence too much then. They’re both booked and busy I think we’ll continue to only get a couple episodes a season from them

8: Francesca did get to thrive happy in pt 2 my baby I love her

9: I think they managed to disconnect the mondrich plot even further like 😭 once again, I don’t mind them their plot just feels very empty

10: Pen and Delacroix CONTINUE to be my fave duo I love them so freaking much and they can never get rid of it

13: Portia’s growth this season continued to be 10/10 I loved her and Penelope’s relationship it really showed what it’s like to be closely related to people you oppose and the process of needing to forgive and understand them for your own peace of mind

14: that was not how I was expecting Colin to find out about Whistledown

15: Marcus felt a little rushed in part two but I think I need to watch the whole season together to fully decide

17: this was indeed the longest 27 days of my life I got Covid day after it dropped lmfao

MY ~NEW~ THOUGHTS:

We finally got character development from Cressida and if they write her out I’ll be inconsolable (as will Jessica Madsen)

I hope they paid Golda Rosheuvel good for her feet exposure. Worth more than titties in this economy

I feel the need to tell everyone that £5000 in 1815 is in the realm of £500,000 today and we cannot brush over the fact Penelope has made herself the equivalent of a literal millionaire

Anthony has two moods ‘I’m obsessed with my wife’ ‘I want to win this game’ like it is comical how drastically different his facial expression is in the game of charades compared to pretty much every other scene

Anthony saying the marriage is perfect and not hard work and Kate being like BOY I will humble you,,,, doing the lord’s work I love her so much

At some points I felt like Francesca was fighting Anthony for ‘Violet’s least favourite child’ award lmao

John saying he’s off to look at the wainscotting was unfairly funny

Cressida in the red dress is even better than I imagined fuck even if she’s not gay then I am

Peneloise back together the universe is healing I love my babies all we need now is creloise lovers and peneloise friendship simultaneously I don’t like it being one or the other sue me

However much Brimsley is getting paid isn’t enough,,,, Hugh Sachs the man that you are

I adored Penelope’s wedding dress so much and as bitter as I am still about no kanthony wedding in s2, it felt kind of right somehow for Polin to be the first wedding we properly see in this show

Most of the costumes and makeup feel like they got worse,,,,, big ‘I hired a 14 year old’ energy. I don’t need historical accuracy but I would like a modicum of care and the costume/hair/makeup dept looking at a single historical reference from before 1850,,,, please

We all got the bi Benedict we’ve been asking for and I appreciate it, and recognise that he needed Tilley to explore that, but I still would’ve preferred if they first main queer experience was not a threesome

If they go straight into benophie in s4 (which idk, I’m so torn bc I feel like F, E and B all could work well next season) then I also feel like bi Benedict was just them throwing a bone for 5 mins but meant nothing

The CONTENTIOUS Michaela Stirling,,,,, I was undecided until I saw it but that was the definition of gay panic from Francesca and it worked so well I am so excited.

As your resident peerage expert, it is much easier for women to inherit titles in Scotland than England so I wonder (not that anyone on this show knows anything) if that was a reason they chose Francesca to be sapphic [general peerage info and female inheritance info if you care]

On the above, if they can canonically end racism with one marriage then they can end homophobia with one marriage as well

We all know Eloise was the easy and obvious choice to be the queer love story but part of me does kind of like them not taking the easy route, and them going something more unexpected, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want Creloise/Sapphic El like they had eight children let’s be honest

Finch’s sneeze and Phillips’s “now Varely! The bugs!” were unfairly funny

Everything Lady Danbury said to Penelope about suspecting her and what not felt very in character and you can fight with the wall idc

Did they tell us the name of Polin’s baby boy???

Hyacinth saying she thinks of Gregory as the family pet,,,,, girl you an icon walking amongst mere mortals

Predictions I got right:

Anthony didn’t kill Colin, but “are you gonna duel your own brother” lmao I was on the right track

I knew Polin would win the Featherington baby race and I love that for them (but why were Prudence and Phillipa pregnant most of the season, barely showing, Kate was showing almost immediately, and then in the epilogue the sisters all had baby’s similar-ish ages???? Give the writers room a calendar please)

I SAID FROM DAY DOT THAT THE FURNITURE THEY BROKE FROM SEX WAS A CHAISE I CANT FIND THE POST BUT I KNEW IT I FUCKING KNEW IT WHERE DO I COLLECT MY PRIZE SOME OF YOUR GUESSES WERE TRULY FUCKING COOKED

Okay that was too long if you made it this far I’ll make you cookie ily

[emmyspov]

Communication (Boromir x Reader)

author's note: after reading some really amazing boromir fics (yes, @sotwk i am looking at you especially 👀) i am now in my boromir of the fellowship era (also legolas, I know, i am like 10 years too late for my age group, but i've suddenly become very obsessed with orlando bloom) and wanted to contribute something! please bear with me, it's my first time writing for him & english isn't my first language 🩷

warnings: everybody lives AU, angsty in the beginning (insecure reader/boromir), idiots being in love & fluff (plus a tight friendship between faramir and reader & established faramir/éowyn <3) - let me know if i missed something!

word count: 2.2k

edit is mine, all pics are from pinterest :)

“You should join us again. My brother has been looking for you all evening.”

You turned around to Faramir and sighed. “I know you only want to make me feel better, but I saw him dancing with a fair lady earlier, probably one of noble blood.” You swallowed hard. “And the way he was looking at her, I just-” You shook your head while focusing on cleaning whatever surface seemed dirty, leaving your friend to imagine the rest of your sentence.

It wasn’t necessarily a secret that you had been harboring feelings for the Lord of Gondor and yet, he seemed blind to whatever affection you were trying to show him.

The younger one of the brothers leaned against a table, his eyes fixated on you. “You should see the way he looks at you.”

A bitter laugh escaped your lips. “Are you taking on the role of the jester tonight? His eyes never even cross mine.” You wrung out the piece of fabric with your hands, trying to let go of some of the heavy feelings in your chest.  

“Please, Faramir, you are only making this harder for me. Boromir will never let his heart be captured by someone like me.”

“My brother does not care about status. You could be the lowest servant and it would not affect the way he feels about you. You care for Gondor, for the people here, our people, and he sees that. Nothing else matters.”

You finally let go of the dirty cloth in your hand and faced your friend, wiping the sweat off of your forehead with the back of your hand.

“I’m not saying he cares about my rank; I’m saying that he has hundreds of people who want him. Women and men from all over Middle Earth. Why would he go for someone who… no one else has ever shown interest in?”

Faramir was about the reply when your voice cut through the silence again.

“By now, I think I am just not lovable in that way. People love me as a friend, as a sibling or as an advisor when there is work to do. And I adore that. I love that I never have to question if there are people who care for me. But I do ask myself if there is something wrong with me.”

The younger brother squeezed your shoulder in a comforting manner. “The only thing that’s wrong with you is the way you see yourself. You will find someone who-“

You finished his sentence for him, a teasing grin on your lips, as soon as you realized he had gotten lost in thought. “Someone who will make your palms sweaty? Your heart beat faster? Someone who will make the blood rush into your cheeks?”

A giggle left your lips at the sheepish smile on Faramir’s face. “I apologize.”

Your finger poked his chest, scolding him playfully. “Don’t you dare, son of Gondor. You deserve this. You really do. I can see that Éowyn brings joy into your life. Speaking of Éowyn – shouldn’t you return to your lady?”

“And leave you here all by yourself? No, let us go together. You haven’t danced with anyone tonight and I cannot let you leave in that state. I have to a see a smile on that face.”

It was impossible to stay in your little bubble of self-pity when you had a friend like Faramir. Even though he was courting a shieldmaiden of Rohan, he was still watching out for you and your happiness.

“You have convinced me. One dance and then I will leave.”

Faramir smiled and pushed himself away from the table, leading you out the door where you nearly bumped into his older brother and Éowyn.

“My love, we were looking for you”, she exclaimed and immediately wrapped her arms around his arm. “Boromir wanted to get away from everyone for a moment and we figured it would only be the two of you in this part of the building.”

Little did you know that Boromir had pretty much begged his soon to be sister-in-law to lead him to you. And she was neither dumb or blind, she knew how you two felt about one another.

Your eyes fell to Boromir’s hands. He was carrying several jugs and although he did so with ease, you couldn’t help but offer assistance.

“May I help you with that, my Lord?”

His eyes locked with yours and immediately, you looked down to the ground. Blood rushed into your cheeks and you cursed yourself internally.

One look from him was all it took for you to get weak in the knees.

Boromir, on the other hand, was struggling just as much. If he said yes, you might feel like it was expected of you and that he saw nothing else in you but some sort of servant – which wasn’t the case, of course. But if he said no, he would lose another chance of getting to speak more than just a few words with you.

After what felt like an eternity, some words finally tumbled out of his mouth. “You don’t have to.” He cleared his throat, trying to get rid of the nervous lump. “But I would appreciate your company.”

Your head snapped up, eyes locking with his once more. With new found confidence and a smile on your face, you took two of the jugs and made your way back into the room you came from.

“Is there some warm water around here? To clean the jars?”

You nodded. “Yes, I boiled some earlier for other things, but do not worry. It is not your responsibility to wash up.”

The Lord chuckled. “It isn’t yours either. So, do you have a preference?”

“Sorry?”

“Would you rather wash or dry the dishes?”

Thousands of thoughts were running through your head and yet, the only thing you could focus on was the man in front of you, holding a towel in one, and a cloth in the other hand, asking you about what you’d rather do.

To others, it might seem like a small thing, but most of the time no one even cared if you did the chores around here, let alone offer help.

“Oh.” A smile spread over your face. “I do not have a preference.”

After one look at your hands and seeing how wrinkled the skin already was from all the work you’ve been doing this evening all by yourself, Boromir threw the towel at you and started to roll up his sleeves to protect the fabric from the water, exposing his strong forearms.

Blood rushed into your cheeks at the thought of what he could do with those arms and you averted your gaze, trying to think of something else, something decent.

“Why did you leave so early tonight?”

You were not going to admit that you had felt out of place all evening, that you had desperately wished for some of his attention or that you couldn’t bear to see him dancing with so many people but you.

“I figured I would be more of use here.”

The man looked around. “We’re the only ones here. The celebration is in the great hall and, forgive me, while you are a very hardworking person, there is no way you can take care of everything by yourself. Wasn’t it Aragorn’s explicit wish for us to enjoy ourselves tonight?”

You took the first clean jug from Boromir, accidently meeting his wet fingers in the process. A shudder ran through you.

“It was.”

“And you’re telling me you were enjoying this time here, working all by yourself, more than the festivities with your loved ones?”

You gulped. “I am telling you that I was only sitting around all by myself in the great hall and that, here, I could be at least somewhat productive.” You could feel his eyes on you and a sigh left your lips. “Alright. I felt like I didn’t belong there tonight.”

So much for not telling him.

“I saw Aragorn with Arwen and Faramir with Éowyn and I couldn’t stand the pity in their eyes anymore whenever they looked my way.”

“Why would they pity you?”

You set down another glass after drying it off, letting the question hang in the air for a moment.

Your voice was quiet when you spoke. “Because the man my heart is set on has not shown me an ounce of attention while I was there.”

The jug Boromir was currently washing slipped out of his hands at your little secret.

He should have known. There was no way he’d ever have a chance with you.

“I apologize for not paying you any attention.”

Your eyes widened. You hadn’t realized your statement was so revealing. Guilt was spreading in your chest as you saw his head hung low. He deserved to be happy, no matter with whom.

“No! No, I- I haven’t earned the right to tell you who you should or shouldn’t dance with. If she makes you feel light in your heart, then I support that.”

His green eyes met yours. “Me?”

Suddenly, you realized your mistake. He had not apologized for not returning your feelings. He was feeling guilty for not paying more attention to his friend earlier. 

Oh no.

“You were talking about me?”

“My lord.“ You gulped, trying to find something, anything, that would ease the tension between the two of you. “It was not my intention to burden you with my feelings. But I am glad that they are out in the open, even if you do not return-“

At that, Boromir wrapped his arms around your shoulders, pulling you against his hard chest. You tensed up.

“Why would you think I do not harbor the same feelings for you?”

You held your breath.

“Who do you think ordered fresh flowers to your chambers last week?”

Slowly, you lifted your gaze. “That was you? I thought- I thought that was Samwise’s doing because he is the only one I ever told my favorite flower, so I sent a letter to the Shire to thank him but he-“

“The halfling told me. After I asked him.” After a few moments, a chuckle left his lips. “I do admit, I should have added my name. Or at least a hint that it was me who sent the flowers.”

“But I don’t understand! Did you never notice my accidental touches or my longing eyes or…” You stopped yourself when you saw the playful twinkle in the man’s eyes. Your cheeks were burning when you realized what you had just admitted.

“I did notice. But apparently, I misunderstood your intention. I thought you were just being friendly.”

You let your head fall against his shoulder, soft laughter falling from your own lips by now. “We should really work on our communication, my beloved.”

“What was that?”

You could hear the teasing tone, but you did not care. “I said”, you whispered into his ear, “that we should really work on our communication. My beloved.”

Boromir hummed, one of his hands wandering to the small of your back. “We should”, he mused, while he dried off his hands on the towel you were holding. “But first, I think I owe you a dance.”

He saw your eyes widen with happiness at the proposition and his heart skipped a beat.

Oh, the things he’d do to ensure your happiness.

The fingers that weren’t sprawled over your back, grabbed your hand. You could feel your heart beat against your ribcage.

“I apologize in advance for stepping on your toes”, you breathed out which earned you a soft laugh.

“I have survived worse, sweetheart. I got you. Just follow my lead.”

Nothing has ever been easier. You trusted him.

Boromir was invading all your senses, making you lose track of time. His scent, his hands touching you – they were so warm, you realized – his gaze flickering back and forth between your eyes and your lips, making you dizzy.

A gasp left your lips as the lord twirled your around before pulling you flush against his body, his hands settling on your waist, holding you steady. His eyes were locked on yours.

No words could describe what you were feeling right now, your whole body was buzzing.

“Kiss me.”

Boromir’s grip on your waist tightened slightly and he cleared his throat. “Are you certain?”

You nodded your head yes. “I am. Please.”

As if he’d ever deny you such a request.

The man cupped your cheek and leaned down. Your heart was racing and you fisted the fabric of his shirt. Your pulse quickened and you closed your eyes, trying to calm your breathing before his lips touched yours.

His lips were warm. Maybe everything about him was warm, you wondered. A little dry, too, but you didn’t mind.

It only took you a few seconds to fully relax into his touch. Every thought in your head was replaced with him. 

A little whine tumbled out of your mouth when you two parted and Boromir took a deep breath before pressing a quick kiss against your lips once more. 

He grinned at you afterwards. “How is that for communication?”

You chuckled and wrapped your arms around his middle, letting your head rest on his chest. “I’d like to learn how to communicate with you in every possible way.”

Taglist: @shadowhuntyi @asgardianhobbit98 @fizzyxcustard

-> if you want to be added or removed from my taglist, just shoot me a message or an ask 🩷

[0utpost-alpha]

Personal Thoughts On Red vs Blue: Restoration

Alright so, it’s been a few weeks since Red vs Blue Restoration hit the internet. I’ve had time to sit, think, cry and process RvB and Rooster Teeth as a whole ending. As I stated on a previous post, I got into RVB around 2015? I think Season 13 had ended then. So I haven’t really spent as much time with the Sims Troopers as many others have. But those 9 years were wonderful and I’m grateful for finding such an entertaining show and fandom. Any show that can make me laugh my ass off and also make me full on sob my eyes out is 10/10 in my book.

Anyway, moving on. I said I’d put out my own personal thoughts and feelings for Restoration in the form of a Pro’s and Con’s post; so here it is:

THE PROS

The AI Fragments: I LOVE them going back and focusing on the AI fragments again. I remember hearing that Miles was talking about how he was going to do something similar with them after the Chorus Trilogy but things happened and Jason ended up taking over after Season 14. I personally always adored the idea of the Reds and Blues each getting one of the AI fragments that suited their personal needs and would lead to more character development for them later on down the line.

Tucker and the AI’s: On the subject of AI’s, After Season 13, I remember reading a lot of fan theories and fanfics that often brought up what possible side effects Tucker could go through with Epsilon not only shattering but having all those fragments at once helping him power the Meta suit. And it looks like a lot of them weren’t far off! While we will never know what actually happened once those doors were opened, at some point either immediately or not long afterwards, the AI took control and ran off with poor Tucker.

Caboose’s Voice: While it was a little jarring at the beginning, being so used to Joel’s, Michael Malconian did a phenomenal job as Caboose’s voice. I feel like he got that child-like, not all there, but still ready to help out however he can personality down perfect. NGL, I think I actually prefer this voice to the old one. I’m just sad that we won’t get to hear more of this Caboose.

Speaking of Caboose: I love how they had Caboose have a big brain moment. Instead of bringing back Church, something he wanted more than anything, he knew Tex was their best chance against Meta!Tucker. Also, destroying the Memory Unit. Talk about huge character development for Cabooses character. (It’s also possible that this was what Church asked Caboose to do when he was whispering to him in the ship? I need to go back and rewatch it)

Simmons: I know there was already an image or video around showing Simmons with the robotic arm, but I kind of fell off the RvB bus after Zero came out so I missed a bit of content that was floating around on the internet. So me and @yourscientistfriend were tickled pink when we noticed his arm for the first time. It’s small, but nice to know that RT remembered that specific detail about Simmons.

Sarge’s Sacrifice: alright, this one is probably on a lot of peoples Con’s lists but I personally feel like, if any of them were gonna be killed off Sarge was the best because; he died doing what he loved. Fighting. He protected his boys and went down on his own terms. His farewell to Grif definitely hit the hardest. I think deep down we all knew Sarge cared about Grif, but actually hearing him say it was so satisfying.

Memory is the key: the boys sitting around the campfire reminiscing about everything they had been through together in the last 23 years was such a bitter sweet nostalgia blast. The fact that they also got BNL to do a song over it was kind of a nice surprise too.

THE CONS

A lot of characters didn’t really get a chance to shine. It mainly focused on Simmons, Grif, Tucker and Caboose for a majority of the movie. Donut was only there in a thought bubble for a gag, Carolina didn’t even show up till the very end, and Wash didn’t even get to fight, he honestly didn’t really even serve a purpose except to fall off a fucking cliff to get Carolina’s attention and I feel like that wasn’t even necessary. Hell, I think they even forgot about Lopez after that one scene at the beginning. I honestly feel for the Donut and Doc fans. They seriously got screwed over.

“Come With Me”: So. Grimmons didn’t become canon. I am, severely disappointed as I’m sure a majority of the fandom is. I wasn’t expecting a kiss or a make-out section or anything that extreme. But I feel after all these years of teasing us they could have given us SOMETHING.

Tucker Trauma: As I said in the Pro’s, I loved the set up they did with Tucker and the fragments. However, what I didn’t like was how they didn’t address the trauma Tucker went through with them controlling him. They forced him to kill innocent people, attack his friends and mentally tortured him in order to get him to cooperate or wear him down enough to take control. But after they remove the fragments, he’s just ok now? Back to his regular bow chika bow wow self? Don’t get me wrong, like with many of my other cons I realize that a lot of things had to be scrapped or cut because of time and that because Season 19 had to be turned into a movie instead of a full blown season they couldn’t properly address a lot that they probably wanted to. But I wish we could have at least got something along the lines of Wash taking Tucker back with him to get physically and mentally checked out.

Also, wtf is up with Grif just up and leaving. I know Season 15-17 was retconned (update: they weren’t retconned) but damn man, Grif really doesn’t care about any of them? Even after the whole reminiscing scene? It just feels out of character for him. I feel like after everything was said and done he would have taken those papers and shot them or something. Said something about how someone’s gotta give the new leader of the reds a hard time, said something about not leaving till he figure out why they were there!?  Anything than whatever the hell that was.

Thing’s I’m sad will never happen now that Red vs Blue is officially over:

More time with Locus’s character as well as character development and redemption (as well as possibly becoming one of the Reds and Blues)

Grimmons

Simmons’s getting an arc that better fleshes out his character and would give us more background into his history (I mean come on. From the bits and pieces we got over the seasons, it’s very clear Simmons’s had a shitty past. Yes, I’m still mad that his labyrinth was turned into a alien probing joke)

Never seeing an actual conclusion to the fight at the end of Season 13. (I get they wanted to let the fans play around with ideas on what happened but it still bugs me).

Wash and Simmons bonding during a knife training session

Wash and Tucker bonding over AI Trauma

Tucker and Junior bonding

Overall, it was an ending. And probably the most decent one we could have gotten considering everything that was going on. A lot of other shows didn’t even get that. So I honestly can’t complain too much. They also deliberately left the ending pretty open so the fandom could easily write their own ending if they wanted to which is awesome of them.  

[topaz-carbuncle]

OC in 15: Valerie Michaelis

rules: share 15 or fewer lines of dialogue from an OC, ideally lines that capture the character/personality/vibe of the OC. Bonus points for just using dialogue without other details about the scene, but you're free to include those as well!

Thank you for the tag @crownleys! <3

I have been missing Val and Nate a lot recently, so it's been fun to go through my older stuff for this, especially as she's the OC who got the most love so far in terms of written dialogue!

Dialogue from posted works will be marked with " <x>"!

1: "Nate...I'm sorry, but I couldn't just sit and hide while you got hurt, especially not because of me. I might not be anything special, like you four are, but do you think I could bear to stand by and watch you get hurt either? I know that you are trying to protect me and I appreciate that so much…But you need to let me work with you, as a team. You need to trust that I can do this, that I can be a part of your world." <x>

2: “I promise. I’m sorry for worrying you, I just couldn’t bear the thought of losing you,” she gives him a watery giggle, a giggle that transforms into a shy smile as he raises a neat eyebrow at her- urging her to continue, “we really make quite the pair, don’t we? Constantly worried for the other, to the point of ignoring our own safety and how it would affect those around us.” <x>

3: As if on cue, Val’s melodic voice cuts through Adam’s rant before Nate could even raise a hand to interrupt him. “Aww, you do care about me!” <x>

4: With her hands still on his chest, she looks up at him bashfully, biting her lip as she considers her words. “Is this a bad time to admit that, despite being the one to suggest that we come to the beach, I don’t actually know how to swim…?” <x>

5: “Well, most children who have parents to take them on holiday probably do.” She struggles to keep the bitterness out of her voice, wincing slightly as she sees the sadness in Nate’s eyes, the same sadness that plagues him whenever she brought up her childhood...Or lack thereof. “But this is my first holiday! My first family holiday, so it would be nice if one of you could teach me…?” <x>

6: “Punishment… what punishment?” Before she can fully register the situation, a cold gust of wind brushes past her as she stares up at Mason in confusion, slowly realising that her vampiric defence had vanished from in front of her. “Wait… Et tu, Nate?” <x>

7: “I’m not exactly sure where to start,” Val runs her hands through her hair as she paces, the action doing very little to bring her comfort as she tries to pull at the stitches holding her heart and mind together, “or how to start actually… This might take a while. It might take a few days.” <x>

8: “No, she didn’t know. I had changed my emergency contact for the hospital to Tina a few years before that. If Mum knew…she certainly never visited, so there's a good chance she doesn’t know at all. She can’t know, Nate. I’m sorry to throw all this onto you like that.” <x>

9: She cocks an eyebrow up at him before giving him her best dramatic gasp, her hand planted on her chest, "Agent Sewell, do you mean to tell me that you've been snooping through my possessions? What would the others say?"

10: "Yeah well...It's about to sound a lot more like begging in roughly 2 minutes if that disgusting spider isn't dealt with. Are you all here to watch, or can one of you do something since Adam is more content to be a pain in the arse?"

11: "Are you proposing to me, Agent Sewell?" She peers up at him through her eyelashes, the humour in her voice falters as hope takes over.

12: "Am I doing this right?" She breathes out a small laugh at the adorably confused look he sends her way. "I'm not doing a very good job at coherently starting my sentence. It's just… I'm worried that I don't know how to love properly, it's not like I had an example to follow while growing up."

13: “A lot of people prefer putting their thoughts out for the public to read. This can work out well for me when the station finds evidence out in the virtual open like this, you have no idea how many people incriminate themselves through this. Books can be burnt, but this? This stuff is forever, so uh…be careful if you plan on committing any crimes and then posting about it online.”

14: "And you are a powerful man, Agent Sewell."

15: "...Yes Nathaniel ?" <x>

Tagging: @serenpedac @lucysarah-c, @humanitys-strongest-bamf, @youre-ackermine, @l3visthighs! (i'm not sure if some of you have oc's that you write for, but it could be fun to show some "reader" dialogues as well / instead of! <3)

[taevincii]

Week 1: Post Game Thoughts

Need to rant rq lol

◦ Dicker is the only person I have complete trust in lol at least we can count on him to get us on the board when needed

◦ Mack and Bosa are elite (which we knew)!!! They saved our assess way too many times. The defense as a whole played well this game. Need our offense to step up and match that, tho. Everyone say thank you D!!

◦ Like I said at the start, it is Game 1 after all, and while the O-line does have a lot to figure out, we have to also acknowledge that the Raiders have an elite D-Line (the addition of Christian Wilkins - traded from MIA - alongside Max Crosby is a deadly combination, the Raiders will probably finish with a top 5 Defense in the league this season) and this being a week 1 match-up was difficult to prepare for and adjust to for the basically new O-Line

◦ QJ missed a huge catch for a conversion in the 1st that he cannot continue to do if he’s going to be WR1 this year. Not sure what his deal is but we need him to be better

◦ Palmer, as one of the only veteran receivers on this team, unfortunately, (I’m still bitter about Parham) missing a totally catchable ball in the end zone was unacceptable. Herbert put that on the money and he needed to catch that. That was a tough incompletion.

◦ As for Justin, he was rushing a few of his throws, especially on third down that could’ve given us a much-needed conversion (I get that he didn’t have time bc the Raiders defense is very much elite and he can’t fully trust his OLine) he very much could have PTSD from last year, as well. I, too, hate that he always has to be Superman but if no one else is going to step up, he’s gotta figure out how to make something shake.

◦ On that same note, I ALSO do believe Justin couldn’t let it rip this game bc he doesn’t have that connection with a receiver yet. There isn’t anyone he considers his “go-to” target and, because of that, he was trying to throw to everyone in hopes that someone would make something happen. That is, unfortunately, a part of the game with a new receiving core and that’ll just have to work itself out as the season goes on. Justin (and, thus, the offense) is at his best when he can throw freely and deep but trust with receivers is needed to do that, which he doesn’t have just yet bc no one is consistent.

◦ JK Dobbins!!!!!!!!!!! 10 carries, 135 yds and a TD. Beautiful. Came up big on several occasions, had a great run in the 3rd (although we couldn’t finish the drive and get it in the end zone, smh) and then the TD in the 4th - definitely a spark we needed, so give him his credit for how well he played today, especially finding his spark after a hard 1st half.

◦ Speaking of running, not sure where our run game was throughout the rest of the game, like, I fear it’s on the back of a milk carton; MIA. Greg, we need answers on that one, buddy.

◦ I would like to give Hayden Hurst his credit bc I feel like he isn't talked about enough, he’s been on a few teams around the league (including the Bengals) and is very fucking reliable. Wish he got more targets this game but it’s great to know he’s always an option. A good one, at that

◦Overall rating for our play 6/10 (bonus points for the defense and how we ended the game) we really picked it up at the end which was great to see but we cannot start that slow. Especially against better offensive opponents. We have to be consistent and put the game away as soon as we can. We can’t do these last quarter surges where we’re dependent on one more possession or a field goal to close a game. Penalties were fucking insane, too, I don’t even want to speak on those. Let’s hope they clean that up going forward too.

Looking forward, (hopefully) the Panthers shouldn’t be as much of a test, Steelers could present trouble, but the Chiefs will by far be the hardest game yet, sucks we play them so early in the year. Hopefully, we’ve tweaked some things by then.

Overall game mood: not very pretty but twas a win

[coachtfd]

Oh maaaan please lemme tell you: I’ve been a United fan more than 20 years and been through thick and thin with the club and it will always be like this. I will always support United and no one else. But at the same time I genuinely DO NOT enjoy watching United for a VERY long time. It’s not the lack of trophies for me personally but the fact that our football is so fucking ugly it physically hurts to watch. We are so poor at footballing activities it boggles the mind! Even against dead last Southampton we were poor as fuck but I wasn’t even surprised because that’s been our standard for a while. Our football is outright unwatchable and if I was a little kid right now I sure as hell would not fall in love with this sorry excuse of a football club. I had huge hopes for Ten Hag but I’m so fed up with him now I can’t stand to look at him nor listen to his bullshit interviews anymore. He has been here for 2 years and he’s done fuck all in my book. And I swear to god I didn’t expect him to win the fucking prem in his first 3 years but I very much HOPED to see good fucking football and he couldn’t deliver! In 2 years we had like 5 good games when I thought this is it! This is how Manchester United football club should play! The rest? Abysmal performances one after another. One season going down the drain like dirty bath water after another.

Oh and not to mention the moral decay the club is in.. they almost brought Greenw**d back no problem! Like my beloved club that I have been supporting with my heart and soul and my money was on the cusp of reintegrating that pos and only changed plans in the last second when they saw that the reaction to that possibility was far from kind and understanding. Then we have another scandal involving Antony who’s still here and playing despite the allegations against him. Should be out the fucking door ffs but the club didn’t even try to get rid of him. Fuck that!

I’m massively disappointed in this club for several reasons so no I can’t even celebrate a win at this point. Win or lose I just acknowledge it and move on. I think in the last 10 years they managed to kill my love and passion I used to have for football itself. I used to miss events and outings just to catch the famous Man United play but now? Sometimes I even forget to check when we play and if I miss a game I just don’t care. Am I plastic now? Am I fake? Guess I’m just disillusioned and bitter. Oh well.

Ah fuck, this got extremely long, feel free to delete it’s whatever x

There it is, that’s what I wanted to get to. I feel you on all of this, I totally get it. And I don’t blame you for thinking or feeling this way, United has put all of us through the wringer. Some of us way more than others because it’s more than just a sports team to them. It is for me.

I remember when glimpses of United was all I could hope for because they didn’t start showing full games on the regular in the US until I was out of high school. My dad would literally interrupt whatever I was doing if he found out that a game was on. We weren’t very close and didn’t get along very well as I got older, but we had football in common, we had United. I don’t take it for granted that a team named United pulled us together when it felt like just about everything else pushed us apart. He loved their resilience, their never quit attitude. As a West Indian, he loved Dwight York and Andy Cole. So I get your passion, and I understand your anger.

I made a promise to the United fans on here that when I truly felt better times were ahead I would let them know, and I’m doing that now for a reason. I was right when I predicted this dark time we’ve been in and I believe I’m right about it coming to an end. It won’t be this season or the next, but it’s coming. I encourage you to keep hoping and to try to rekindle your love for this incredible club. I once said that every United fan is a winner and winners love supporting each other. You’re a winner, and if our club is going to win the league again it needs your support right now. It’s honestly not about me at all, we’re Manchester United, winning is our way. You can’t keep a winner down forever. 🙂

My inbox is always open. If you ever need to vent about United or life, or just need a shot of encouragement, please feel free to write me…that goes for all of my followers. ❤️ #ggmu

[joyfull24]

Perils of Napping

I get triggered by the term contact napping. It’s used by people who are generally against parents holding their kids while they sleep. Since I’m not one of these people, I can’t tell you what bothers them exactly. But something does because they call it contact napping instead of napping.

There are a lot of warnings out there. Apparently, once you start contact napping you won’t be able to quit it. Naps are more addictive than hard drugs. How will you get anything done if you hold a sleeping child? You’ll perish of exhaustion and then who will want to take care of your needy baby?

My baby, like all babies, likes to be held to sleep. He is currently 10 weeks old. And sometimes, don’t tell anyone with pediatrician in their job title, I hold him while he sleeps. You might think this is incredibly dangerous, as parenting books today make it seem like the leading cause of childhood death, behind accidentally drowning, is getting dropped off the sofa by your sleeping parents. I have not fallen asleep while holding my child on the sofa, yet, but I still feel guilty when I do it.

Because this is contact napping and apparently for my little human’s development, I should be laying him down always to sleep in a cold, dark, empty crib until he has a flat spot on the back of his head and he needs an expensive helmet to correct his neck tendons. I’m giving pediatrician’s flack, but my son actually has a great doctor who is very relaxed. He recommended a parenting guidebook and specified that we should use it to troubleshoot instead of looking things up on Doctor Google, which I think is generally good advice. Only problem is, its his job is to know my son, not me. No one has ever handed me a book I didn’t read cover to cover.

So reading this damn thing is where some of my bitterness comes from. The authors’ would have me believe that they put their kid down for every nap every day of their lives. My own experience as a child tells me this cannot possibly be true. Maybe it is. But I kinda want a kid like me. I want a kid who can sleep in the car on a forty hour road trip to Disney because their parents saved up for months, but didn’t want to pay to stay in a hotel to split up the drive, since that would be wasting money. I want a kid who can sleep at a summer concert, in the middle of July, and maybe crack an eye when the fireworks go off. I want a kid who can sleep at Buffalo Wild Wings on the table in between trivia questions with that weird little tablet gripped in their sticky little fingers (pretty sure they don’t use the plastic punch pad tablets anymore, I’d guess trivia’s on your cell phone now – feel free to correct me, I haven’t been to a BDubs in years).

I think napping on the go is an important trait. I don’t worry about this with my kid so much. I am confident he will inherit my super power…to sleep on trains, planes, and automobiles. His mom has woken up mid-trip to jump off a train two stations early in the middle of Rome (she doesn’t speak Italian). She’s also ridden all the way to Kenosha and had to turn around when she missed her stop having a good nap after work. These are important life experiences I wouldn’t want him to miss out on!

...

Read the rest for free over on Word Press: https://joy-fulls.com/

[die-remastered]

Night Raven College Majors and general hc pt. 1/??

Aka Night Raven College college

These are largely based on my experience, don’t take them too seriously lmao

Also these are very rough, but let me know if anyone wants to see more ideas (I may do a post of like embarrassing college moments that have happened to me as twst characters lol)

Vil

I bet you think I’m gonna be boring and say like acting or theatre…WRONG

Marketing major with a minor in cosmetic sciences (he does take theatre electives though)

He’s a nepotism baby with a solid career and high understanding of acting methods and techniques, it wouldn’t add anything to his repertoire if he just had an extra piece of paper

He went marketing to help him better share himself and his collaborations

He has a small cosmetics company and wanted the minor to have a deeper understanding of the craft

He still does like maybe 1 small theatre production at the college for the experience

He’s despised by a certain sector of the theatre majors and there is a theory that he buys his way into productions

He’s also been in a few short films for his fellow students

Everyone is surprised that he as an RA (cause like he absolutely doesn’t need the free housing and meal plan) but he just says he likes looking out for freshman and wanted the normal college experience

Ace

He’s a freshman and he’s gone through 3 majors already

He started off in sports medicine but didn’t like it, he then moved to civil engineering (solely for the idea of the salary) and dropped after attending one class, then he joined justice studies to be with his friend Deuce and didn’t like that

He is now undeclared and is getting all his gen eds done so he can find something he actually liked

He was this close 🤏 to just making his major psychology cause that’s what he heard people don’t know what to do do, but then met one (willing) psychology major and decided that he had a will to live and dropped it

He plays intramural basketball and is actually pretty good

He hates his RA (Riddle) and has ignored ever rule put into place, has never attended a floor meeting, and has a ban from the floor group chat because he was sending too many elaborate memes and accidentally started a debate on the morality of the seven

He absolutely did not want to be in the heartslabyul dorms but procrastinated picking a room and ended up in them.

He’ll tell you he lucked out with his roommate though.

He’s generally well-liked though, the chat notifications just make people annoyed

There have definitely been at least 3 noise complaints about him sent to housing

He wanted to join a frat and got rejected. He’s sooo not bitter about it and they totallyyyy aren’t missing out on his epic personality.

Cater

Uses social media buzz words too much

Like tooooo much, still says slay

Mass Media major

He has an alter ego on like yik yak that is fairly well known for some reason

Super nice but is the friend you worry about because there are at least 10 empty latte cups on his floor

1 of 3 Heartslabyul RAs

I imagine he runs like one of those tik tok accounts that like post random people on campus and give them a background story

Leona

No one knows how or why he become an RA of Savanaclaw (it’s a common belief his CEO brother pushed him into doing it) but he does a really nice job of it

5th year senior because his brother wanted him to be a business major but Leona threatened to drop out if they didn’t let him switch so now his family is just happy he is there

He’s a kinesiology and honestly doesn’t know what he wants to do

He’s the type that makes sure nothing horrible goes down, but let’s you have your freedom

Like don’t die and don’t interrupt his sleep schedule and you’re golden

Gets straight As without trying

Riddle

The most despised RA, he’s seriously hated

The type to get you in trouble for having a shot glass (nothing in it, you could literally have it to hold rings and he’d report you)

He’s good at heart though, he’s just over committed to his job since it’s his first year being an RA

He’s pushy but he believes he’s doing it to help the underclassmen reach their full potential

Premed major, he’ll tell his close friends that his mom pressured him into it but he actually found out he really likes it

Much like Cater he’s running on coffee, but his room is just cleaner so you can’t tell

The type of student to make you quiver in your boots

Like he’s the poster boy that you see on the college brochures. Internships, honors classes, club leadership, volunteering, and anything else you can think of.

Floyd

He has a habit of terrorizing Freshman

He’s also become an urban legend of sorts on campus, there’s like weird Magicam accounts dedicated to Floyd sightings but no one knows who runs them

Like Ace, his major it undeclared (he gets too easily bored)

More than likely he’ll stay extra time until somehow he randomly completes a degree and can get the hell out

He’s not an RA but decided to stay in the dorms because he thought it would be too boring to live somewhere without Jade and Azul

[rainbowvamp]

an unsent letter: 1861

Laws Change. Love Doesn't.

wc: ~1200

AO3

----

Hello Stranger.

It is no longer an offense punishable by death to have sex with another man. It’s still punishable by 10 years in prison, but at least you can’t be killed for it.

Well, I could never be killed for it, but that’s beside the point.

I don’t think often about how others would perceive my affection for you. I love a great many mortals in my life, but none of them would understand you, or the love I hold in my heart for you. I think if I tried to explain our meetings to anyone, even if I altered the truth about the frequency of our meetings, they would miss the importance of it. The monumental impact that you have had on my life cannot be overstated. I meet you and become better every time. I’m better for having known you, and I can’t explain to lawmakers the sort of harm that they are doing by criminalizing love between men. 

The immorality of a society that so highly values morals is an irony not lost on me. A lack of compassion and a lack of understanding is not new to humans. I have been guilty of this same lack of compassion. I know it intimately and all the havoc it wreaks on the sense of right and wrong that we all carry. The world moves on, slowly but surely. Back and forward, again and again, not unlike myself, I’m sorry to say. I cannot lie and say I have only ever improved myself, only ever gone forward. 

Maybe that’s the curse and the bitter medicine of human beings. Maybe we have to be cruel to understand the impact of that cruelty, to stop it from happening again. Only we forget, and repeat ourselves, again and again. 

Would that we could stop forgetting the places we came from and the horrors we’ve committed. The atrocities that bring us closer to hell on earth when heaven should be wound into the very fabric of our memories and bound up like the most brilliant threads, shining brightly and too noticeable to ignore. Would that the light of our own horrors could be a light that shines on all the things we do each day, to stop us from hurting people, intentionally or not.

Still, a step has been taken, a good step. A better step than has been taken since the buggery act was put into place, at least. I worry that there will be more bad times before times are good again, but I have that eternal hope, shining within my heart, that eventually people do better. We become better, with time. Change is slow by it’s very nature, but with the time I have it is so much more visible. 

And if I am happy to think that this change will come because I dream that I may get to take your arm in mine on a public street, the envy of every mortal man and woman in seeing distance for having such a beautiful creature at my side, that is a desire that none but I need know. 

This desire, at least, hurts no one. Causes no damage. Friends might take each other’s hands. It is not so strange to show these sorts of affection to ones you hold dear, even of the same sex. 

I only wish all my desires were so harmless. All my love so easily soothed away, but there is nothing to be soothed inside me. There is no grace from the torrent and toil, the raging sea of love and grief that war for my attention, casting me to and fro like a ship with no anchor point. Like a leaf in a hurricane. Like all the smallest blades of grass in torrential rain.

I’m suffocating under it. Wrenched around by it. By love that should be sweet but is made bitter by my own fears and doubts. 

And maybe it’s not illegal to love you if I never act on it, but I feel so bereft for not being able to. 

I only want to feel the touch of your hand against mine, but you won’t even tell me your name. If you won’t trust me with something so simple as that, why would you ever let me hold you? 

I have seen the very ends of satisfaction and longing. Felt the deepest pits of hunger and highest peaks of delight.

Even the thought of having you in my arms like a lover, like a partner, like a friend, is a far higher peak.

The lack of you every day feels like a deeper pit. 

I have never touched you, but I feel your absence against me like a weight, some days. 

Which is ridiculous. I’m over 500 years old and I have loved hundreds of people in my life time. As friends, as family, as lovers, as my wife. And you, you who I have only every had the most scant glances from, the shortest hours of soft eyes and compassion, you fill my waking and sleeping hours with more desire for love and affection than any of those others who I’ve loved before. 

Maybe I could pass it off as my own desire for constancy. Maybe I should. Maybe I’d be better served by simply trying to forget these feelings.

But you deserve my love, even if I don’t deserve yours. 

Even if I am never good enough, never worthy enough, to know the touch of your hand, or the taste of your lips, or the sound of your voice whispering sweet nothings. Even if I am never enough, you already are. You have been enough for me for 200 years. 

And it almost feels pathetic when I put it like that. Some sap could write stories about my long enduring love, held on to by pure hope and faith, watered only once every 100 years. 

Seeing you is like the first rays of warm spring sunshine, warming me after each long century spent away from you. Thawing me like winter frost. Urging me to grow again. 

Even if I have no affection from you, which I cannot believe I do not no matter how much I sometimes doubt it, you would deserve every ounce of my love. Unfathomable creature that you are. I will love you until the end of all life, until there is not life left for me to live at all. Until I finally go to heaven or hell or wherever they send immortals with nowhere else to go at the end of the universe.

And even from there. Even if I’m tortured infinitely. I will still love you. 

Even if I’m given every other gift heaven has to offer, without you I would somehow be incomplete. 

It’s good that England is taking a step away from hatred, towards acceptance, if not quite in its realm yet. 

It’s good, and I might live long enough to see the fruits of it. 

I might live long enough to be worthy of you.

After all, anything is possible with enough time.

Truly and devoutly yours,

Hob Gadling

[here2bbtstrash]

hi, eonni! i dont know if you still would keep me in your thoughts. better if you do, or even if you don't, i’d be glad both the ways. maybe if i’m being so dumb and vague, im yun.. hello :')

i disappeared suddenly, because life has never been good on me. i miss you dearly, and i don't have the guts to come infront as a non anon, aka someone with a true blog. of the many people i met in my previous blog, you're the one with whom i felt the most safe with, so i just wanted to drop in..

is it too awkward or sudden to drop in?

i read ldomlt chap 10, and it absolutely broke me. of all the things ive learnt so far, i know it's okay to mess up, because we're all humans. but the avalanche of everything which went on..im alright, because it's just common and we're all humans. but one thing for sure is, yoongi and oc are both idiots, complete idiots, lacking proper communication. with jk, he's an amazing guy, is he single? askin for a friend, obv, ty ty

i do so realised that maybe they won't ever share that golden bond they did, but maybe they can improve and develop with time (: (:

and one thing for sure is, that yoongi totally is gaslighting.

i do know that one shouldn't presume anything, and me myself am, because i do know that yoongi is scared. yoongi is scared that he loves her, and she deserves someone who's better than him, and even some stances of past relationships which is making him gaslight everything, even his own emotions. i do get it, it's the human nature afterall. he's scared, but i hope he understands that life is all about feeling it..

don't know, if im logical for it, but it's, i suppose, oc is in the stage of grief and denial, as well as anger. it's okay, the storyline was great, and i absolutely appreciate you for keeping it so clean and natural, because (having faced some so similar situation myself,) some novel shit absolutely doesn't occur in real life, like they appear when you want them to. life makes you lick your shoelaces and taste the bitterness, and sometimes it burns you out...she has gone through a lot..

but however, i truly hope that the story has a good ending: i know some things can't be mend even after years of exile, but they can be better. i know that yoongi loves her, cares about her, which is why he even came to the party.. and the part when he said

“ i just want you to be happy ”

my heart broke too.

but i hope these idiots take upon and talk, and things get better.

and i hope everything is smoother on your side too, eonni (:

YUN BABY MY DONGSAENG OMG 🥺 it's so good to hear from you!!!!

of course you have been in my thoughts!! i have missed talking to you but i know life is hard and i don't take it personally when people take breaks/walk away from tumblr or i just don't hear from them for a bit!

i do hope things are looking up for you or will soon, if not now then definitely in the new year, bc you deserve good things!! 💜 and you are always welcome to say hi to me no matter how long it's been 🥺

oh god 😭 chapter 10 was so so much i know.... all the emotions and flaws and failures to communicate. so much humanity and MESS between these two. at least we have jk 🫠 who is single but i think you have an entire army of baby star candy stans to fight for his love 🤣

you are so so correct about both yoongi and reader. she absolutely called him tf out when she said he was scared. and i love that you pointed out he isn't just gaslighting her but also himself - that's soooo real. he thinks if he can just shove it down, push her away, and get back to work, the way he's feeling will dissipate.... 👀 guess we'll have to see how that plan goes lmao

i'm so glad you're enjoying the story and that you feel it's natural!! i loved putting in that little end moment even though it's obviously VERY sad... as a lover of tv shows/books and the many tropes that come with them, i have sadly had that moment far too many times myself. it can be so crushing when the imagined scenarios in your head don't come true 🥺 but she's off to start a new life.... and we have to see how it all wraps up!! 💜

ugh it makes me so so happy that you reached out, and that you're still enjoying this series!! i really wanna hear more about your life and how things are going - i'm pretty sure you have me on discord so pls don't hesitate to message anytime!!!

wishing nothing but the best for you in 2023 and beyond, and i'm manifesting that shit, so you know it'll come true 😉✨💜

[scientistofdeduction]

Ok, I live tweeted a rewatch of Study in Pink

And I had a lot of thoughts about it, but main take away was how much I found myself genuinely enjoying it for the first time in years without getting depressed or bitter.

Like a “it is what it is and I’m still going to have fun” attitude.

Under the cut I’ve compiled all my tweets into a single little weird post. Enjoy if you read it.

Alright

So it’s Sherlock rewatch day

For the anniversary of SiP.

I’ve had so much distance on this show since it ended. I wouldn’t say I never rewatch it but I certainly put it down a few months after with the intention of never getting back into it in the same way.

I still know every line of this episode

Probably of the entire first season

It’s not bad, not this first season, but there’s still glaring issues to me that jump out considering the changes they made from the Pilot to the aired SiP episode.

Let’s be honest, Greg Lestrade is the best bit of this whole damn show.

“How do people keep themselves safe?”

“Well, don’t commit suicide.”

Rupert Graves’ deadpan delivery got me on that one this time.

Listen, Lestrade is the one thing I won’t pick apart.

Give points to the editing in this show.

Pretty op tier throughout

Cut from John “who was the first” to the zipper body bag reveal of Sherlock, upside down

Everything about that is really good.

Try not to think “wasted potential” every 10 minutes of this challenge 😂

I Will forever headcanon Sherlock as ace/gay and unbothered by people knowing or finding out. He formally came out to Mrs Hudson and because he loves her, cares not for her parading his business.

Hudson: establishes John is NOT Sherlock’s boyfriend

Immediately relate that she’s ok with it all but in a way she thinks is subtle

Spend the rest of the episode “outing” Sherlock to John

“Please date my awkward son, Mr Army Man, he’s lonely”.

Season 1-2 Hudson is the other greatest character in this show let’s be honest

So many possibilities set up in such a short screen time.

I think contrary to previous belief that actually Sherlock being a “villain” for lack of a better word here is set up pretty well in ep 1 and that thread is continued well in ep 6, but I think they dropped the ball in between.

“Stay away from Sherlock Holmes” is appealing—they could’ve set him up better to be misunderstood by all except those closest to him, and have Holmes not pretend to be anything he isn’t

But I think the whole weird sociopath thing really funked with that thread.

God there’s about to be a million and one fix it fics in my head after this isn’t there?

(Edited: I will definitely post a link if I start doing BBC fic again)

Mark Gatiss as Mycroft is also great casting I just god really loathe the writing of this Mycroft

“Yada Yada bully Mycroft we know, Ro”

It could’ve been a goofy joke! Between brothers! Sherlock reluctantly “Yeah thanks for checking out my new roommate bro but we’re chill” Mycroft laughs it off

No real creepy older brother, he doesn’t spy on them after that, drops the whole Bond villain act etc

This is in fact one of my least favorite Watson’s on screen

(Fanon John doesn’t count he’s cool and soft)

The characters play off each other and it’s silly goofy

Still just a fun watch

Ik I complain alot but it’s nice to have this goofy little first season

This show also could’ve been a deep little meditation on mental health but that and the whole “Sherlock does drugs” bit were missed potential

Phil Davis plays such a creepy Jefferson Hope/cabbie killer

I like the moments too where he and Sherlock have little calmer funny human moments

What gets me is that Holmes is very close to canon age in this (BC was like 34) but damn trying to picture a 5 or maybe 8 year younger man playing this but versus the cabbie over the pills just imagine.

The confrontation with Hope is super well written and still fanfic fodder for days

Hope playing up on this Holmes’s need to be right, his addiction to solving puzzles for stimulation

At the time his inability to look beyond himself for solutions

—this Holmes was willing to risk death for a stupid brain game (he was wrong) (he was so self centered in that moment he believed he was right despite it being very easy to see he was wrong)

Missed beat on the mental health note— assume a Sherlock who back of his head realizes he’s being goaded into taking the wrong one and back of his mind /doesn’t/ care. Instead of asking Hope if he’s right he just chucks the thing away, frustrated because the moment is gone.

“Are you alright”

“Yes of course I’m alright”

“You have just killed a man”

“That’s true..

… but he wasn’t a very nice man”

This departure from the pilot script right here set up the toxic relationship between these two and every time I mourn the loss.

Instead of John getting real and trusting Sherlock, “I saw men die in the war good men” and admitting his ruined sleep because of it. Instead of “I’ll sleep fine tonight,” because Sherlock gave him a war worth fighting for

We get a joke, a little laugh

And this only continues.

Anyways I always get a little laugh at the wonky Mycroft dialogue that’s there just to end the episode with “Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson” as the final words

This show has always been goofy and it makes it fun to revisit.

Happy 13th, Sherlock.

[ladygata]

A non-fandom related 2022 reflection

I debated for a while whether or not to write this post because who fucking cares, right? But then I remembered this is my own personal little diary and while I mostly shitpost, I do occasionally personal post. And boy is this personal.

I left tumblr 10 years ago after being a college tumblr girl. Idk I guess I just lost interest and got swept away by my journey into the real world. Anyway, I came back this year because.. I’m not really sure. Maybe I missed a social media where I could be my most authentic weird self. And this year I really dug deep to be my most authentic self. And I think I succeeded. So I think that’s a win of 2022. It has been really nice to not be afraid of being who I am and just feeling good about myself.

So first half of 2022 was fine. Great even. Second half shit started to hit the fan. 2021 was one of the best years of my life so I guess I was overdue for a less than stellar year.

On the less serious side, I v quickly became stressed out at my job. I mean, it’s already a stressful job as it is but it went overdrive this year. Long story short, I had been super happy and confident teaching my previous grade level for a few years and was absolutely loving it. Until this year admin decided to move several teachers around grade level wise just for the sake of shaking things up. This left many people, including myself, unhappy.

Don’t get me wrong, I like that I’m getting experience out of my comfort zone. But I was given the largest class in the school and also a now notoriously uhh *difficult* group. I love the kids and they deserve all the love and attention in the world. But I am one person. Who is struggling. And admin never checks on me or gives me any words of affirmation. I have to hear through the grapevine that they respect me or some shit.

So all this is happening while my husband and I begin Trying to Conceive (TTC). I very quickly actually become pregnant. And then very quickly become not pregnant.

That was one of the hardest days of my life. I was alone while my husband was away and utterly broken. I’m almost glad no one was home to hear the sounds that came out of me. Honestly I am proud of myself for how I was able to handle myself but I’m still so angry and devastated that I had to. I’ve alluded to this in some of my personal posts but why should I hide it? No one here knows who I am and sometimes I just want to scream it out. But I can hardly talk to anyone about it because I don’t want anyone to know and pity me. Of course my husband and parents and a few close friends know but I force myself not to bring it up even when it’s constantly on my mind.

It has been months and I go back and forth between thinking i am being overly dramatic and making too big a deal of it and thinking I am not making it a big enough deal. It happened so early and it happens to so many people. But I just never thought it would be me. And maybe it’s worse because it’s been one of my deepest adult fears. And let me tell you it fucking sucks seeing so many pregnancy announcements and feeling the bitterness rise behind all my happiness. I hate myself for it. Thinking why did that person get to get pregnant immediately and have the perfect little family. I don’t mean it. I’m so happy for everyone. Honestly. I think it’s mostly my self pity. I know these are natural feelings but it still hurts.

It’s been a few months since and nothing yet. To be fair, it’s still pretty early in our TTC journey. If the miscarriage never happened, I wouldn’t be so distraught. But now fertility fears haunt my every waking move. There’s a good chance I could get some great news pretty soon, but it’ll be haunted with the thought “what if it happens again?”

Sometimes I hate that I want this so bad. I’m tired of thinking of it every day of my life. Especially when aside from this, I have a pretty great life. I have to force myself to remember that I’m truly living my best life, happily authentic like I mentioned earlier. I’m pretty good at Dealing With It and continuing to be happy while also being sad. But man it has sucked.

This took way too long to write and for what. I guess I was needing to get it off my chest. And maybe if anyone actually reads this or relates and feels seen. Then I’m glad. I know it’s nice not to feel alone. I am absolutely open to chat about this too. Cool great now all of tumblr knows the sources of my mental battles lol.

Anyway, I am forever the optimist and believe there will be good things to come in 2023. I just have to be patient. Enjoy the little things. Indulge my weirdness and obsess over media. I’ll keep being proud of who I’ve become because I do think my 13 year old self would be pleased.

Ok I think I’m done. And maybe I should also get a therapist in 2023.

[nnostalg1a]

Class of 1984

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Reader

Warning(s): No happy ending. Fluff. Angst. Mutual pinning. Heartbreak. Crying.

Summary: You and Steve are high school bestfriends that are about to graduate. You’re moving away, Steve’s staying in Hawkins. The thing is, you guys are in love with each other, but it might be too late. Some lyrics from Picture Me Better by Weyes Blood. 

A/N: I don’t know if the year is correct but let’s pretend it is. Criticism is always welcome! I hope you guys like this, I’m home from college and I have absolutely nothing to do so please feel free to send in requests! 

Word count: 1842

Mountains of snow gifted to the people of Hawkins by bitter winter weather made it easy for Steve to send snowballs propelling towards your second-story window. Walking to the park around the block to catch the sunrise had been a common occurrence for you and Steve since Freshman year, but it was hard to keep the tradition going when it’s January, averaging 37 degrees, the sun is not rising anytime soon, and all any logical person would do is stay in the warmth of their houses. You and Steve were rarely logical. You forced yourself to get out of bed and walk towards the window, still wrapped in your blanket, only because it was your final year of high school, and you wanted to bask in every possible moment you could share with Steve before you parted ways indefinitely. Your fingers instantly turned red and numb as you made contact with the cold metal lock on your window and the icy glass, lifting it, and bracing yourself to make contact with the cold winter air; instead, you made contact with another snowball sent your way. You look down and see Steve biting his cheeks, trying not to laugh, “I did not expect you to open your window.” “I’m still in my house, you know; I could leave you out there,” Still struggling not to laugh, “Come on!” Checking the nonexistent watch on his wrist, “You have like 10 minutes to get down here if you want to see the sunrise.”  “Steve, it’s the middle of winter; there’s no sunrise at this hour of the night.” Without missing a beat, he throws his head back dramatically and groans, “ Yeah, whatever, could you please get down here? It’s freezing. No more snowballs, I promise.” You purse your lips and pause, trying to test his patience, “I have 10 minutes, remember?” Steve’s “Oh come on!” is cut short by the sound of you closing your window. 

Three months ago, Steve got you the most hideous, old sweater he could find for your birthday. But it was huge, warm, and it was freezing outside. So you put it on, threw on a jacket over it because seriously, it was freezing, put on your shoes, and went downstairs. You spared Steve his promised 10 minutes. You quietly opened your front door and walked out towards Steve. “Finally found a winter for your sweater,” you said. “It’s very stylish, what can I say? I’m a man of great taste.” You let out a scoff as Steve turned on his heel and started walking towards the park, giving you a perfect chance to form a snowball and send it straight towards the back of his head. You, unlike Steve, did not try to hide your laughter, which only grew louder when Steve turned around with his mouth slightly opened and a singular eyebrow furrowed. “You’ve got quite the throw, y/l/n.” He said as he tried to shake the snow out of his hair, failing miserably because it was a hefty snowball, “Thank you, I feel avenged.” A sarcastic  tone under your voice, “Here, let me help you with that.” You said, making your way towards Steve and letting your hands find their way into his, now very messy, hair, shaking out any leftover snow. Steve takes the opportunity to look down and admire you as you ruffle his hair, taking pure joy in watching it grow messier. He didn’t care. He was too busy focusing on the slight redness painted across your cheeks and nose by the cool air. It was dark, but the street lights provided a warm glow that captured your beauty perfectly. You still had a proud smirk on your face. Steve could stay there forever, but the realization that he only has just about six months with you before you have to leave for college hits him painfully in the chest, almost winding him. 

He forces himself to snap out of his admiration and heartache, wrapping his arms around your waist. You have .5 seconds to plead your case, “No! Steve! Ste-” Before you can finish, both of you hit the snow on the ground, you underneath him, before he rolls over with laughter, laying next to you on the ground. “You asshole, it’s gonna look like I pissed myself,” “Pissed me off is what you did, my poor hair. I’m almost positive I have a concussion now,” he says through his laughter. You snorted; “Let’s not forget Harrington, there’s melted snow all over my bedroom floor, and now there’s a wet stain on my ass.” This only sent both of you into a fit of laughter again, “I really didn’t think you’d open the window,” he struggles to say. You both calm down after a minute or so, laying on the ground, taking in the moment. The snow is melting into both of your clothes now. Steve stands up and offers his hand to you. You take it; he pulls you onto your feet. “I’d say we’re even,” says Steve. “Two to one isn’t very even.” You say jokingly. You're both walking towards the park now, fingers still entwined. 

“Still going on a million dates?” You tease. He snorts this time, “I’d prefer not to dive deep into my love life with you at 4 in the morning, but yes, I'm still looking for my fish in the sea.” You groan, “that’s corny.” “Oh, pardon me, let me rephrase; I'm looking for something with meaning to come through.” The words circle in your head. You were looking for something with meaning too. Something fulfilling. If anyone asked, you’d say you haven’t come across it yet, but you have. You feel pretty damn fulfilled at this very moment with Steve. Steve knows it too; he’s always known it. He’s starting to think he’s the one that’s purposely sabotaged all his dates, hoping that something more will come from the both of you. It could work. It would work. The problem is, there’s not enough time for it to work. You’re leaving almost 15 hours away from Hawkins, and Steve’s going to stay right where you leave him. You’ll both continue to meet people and pretend that they can fill the gap in each other's lives in some capacity. The fact that neither of you has ever dared to tell each other how you feel sickens both of you.

“Meaning.” You repeat. “Yeah, meaning. Just-” He turns to glance at you quickly before looking straight ahead again, “Something that makes me feel … peaceful? Fulfilled? Anything at all?” The words are so pointless because you both have already found that something. You don’t really know what to say anymore; you could confess your feelings. Instead, you use the handy tool that has never once failed you, humor. “I don’t know, Steve, those makeout sessions you tell me about seem to make you feel something.” He covers his eyes and groans with his other hand, not wanting to let go of yours like somehow you’d leave right there and cut your time together short. “One, I don’t want to talk about my makeout sessions at this moment. Two, meaningless make-out sessions aren’t exactly what I'm looking for. And third, what about your million dates?” There’s some jealousy behind Steve’s last sentence. “I stopped going on those weeks ago. I don’t want to get into something that I'm gonna have to end soon.” This makes Steve’s heart rate quicken, and he’s sure he’s pale. He doesn’t want you to notice. “Y/n, your six months aren’t going to end tomorrow.” “Feels like it. Three years felt like two days,” you look at Steve with a faint smile, some sadness in your eyes that you’ll know he’ll notice; he always does, so you look towards the park and keep walking. 

Steve notices, and his rapid heart stings. Who knew talking about time could make someone nauseous?  You were right; the three years Steve has known you feel like they ended way faster than they should have. Maybe love did make time go by faster. Steve’s head is spinning. He can’t feel his feet. Sure, you’ll come back during breaks, but Steve knows it won’t be the same. You were his best friend, but he knows that when you come back, he’s not going to be able to look at you without feeling anything but guilt. He hates himself for it. He feels dizzy. You’re slightly ahead of him now; he was so lost in his own head he slowed his pace. He stops and tugs at your hand that he hasn’t let go for almost this entire walk; you stop and turn around to see a visibly distressed Steve. “What’s wrong? Do you want to sit down? We can go ba-” He feels like he’s out of his body and watching himself. He finally breaks your handhold, cupping your face. His heart rate is going so fast that he might just faint before he does it, but he doesn’t. He kisses you. It’s short, couldn’t be more than 8 seconds, but there’s such a desperate feeling of yearning behind it. It’s so intense that tears are filling in both your eyes. It’s painful to come up for air. 

“Steve,” you say, you can see your breath in the cold air, and that’s all that comes out of it because you don’t know what else you want to say. Steve knows. “What if-” god, if you’re real, please don’t let Steve Harrington embarrass himself and ruin his most valuable friendship, “what if we both already found what we’re searching for?” You don’t say anything, just stare at him blankly, and he swears he doesn’t have a pulse, but he feels it once you talk. “I think we have,” you say, the tear that had previously formed streaming down your face, “but Steve, it’s too late. It would never work.” It’s the worst thing that has ever come out of your mouth. You want to scream. Steve’s eyes are red, and his tears warm his cheeks. “Why wouldn’t it?” “Steve, you know why.” Your voice is breaking. Steve is wretched.

“Y/n, please, we could make it work. I’ll take what I can get, whether 6 months or two weeks. Please.” You sniffle, pull your tears into your throat, and swallow them. It’s the only way you’ll be able to talk. “Steve,” you let your hand cup his face, “we can’t.” “Why not?” Steve feels dumb for even asking because he does know why. He knows there will come the point where he has to accept it, but he doesn’t want to. He’ll be miserable. You give him a weak smile, tears pouring out of your eyes even though you’re fighting to keep them in, “We can’t start something we can’t finish.” His forehead leans against yours, both of your hands laced together. It’s just both of you, at 4 am, in the freezing cold, tears streaming down both of your faces, longing for something that you’ve both waited too long for. Goddamn class of 1984.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Thailand & Vietnam End with Bangs, Korea with a Whimper

Jan 2022 Wk 3

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Not Me (YouTube) Ep 5 - OffGun still crackle on screen together. The parkour jumping thing was, erm, silly. Gram’s info-dumping in this episode showed us exactly why Not Me has no product placement. Also, I want a twist to be that Black was in love with Gram and gave the card. 

Love Area Part 2 (GaGa) Ep 1 - this is basically a continuation of the previous “season” - let’s be fair this is a 12 ep BL that they split into 6 & 6 for reasons of lockdown. Anyway the first half of this first ep is recap. Val & Toon are painfully endearingly awkward, but Toon cannot possibly be that dense about either seme’s intentions. King, Peat & Ice are more interesting to me, but their plot is dealing with domestic abuse and mental health issues which might be too much for me in a BL. There was a fun commentary on the Pink Milk = uke trope. New character Jun is VERY fascinating. So far, Jun is agender in both speech and appearance. Jun uses ha instead of krap/kha. So this show might be worth watching if only for Jun. 

Something in My Room (Ch3Thailand, YouTube) Ep 1 - It’s cute, basically He’s Coming To Me meets So Much In Love and not really scary at all (which I like). Also, nice to see Nut in a new role so different from Solo.  I’ll keep watching. 

Gen Y 2 (grey) Ep 5 - It was totally nonsensical this ep. I spent most of the tome missing ForthBeam. Updated the live blog here. 

Paint with Love (Gaga) Ep 9 - At least stuff happened? Except now the side dishes have gone wonky. GREAT KISS THO. Soem of the domestic bits were cute, I guess? Still, what is going on with thi show? 

You’re My Sky (Viki) Ep 3 - I’m not into the main basketball couple at all. The puppy/nerd-tsundere are cute but he’s a bit too stalker aggressive, still kinda MarkKit vibes. Frankly the cheater couple have by far the best chemistry (bummer because I hate the storyline) but I do love a shy grump vs a flirty playful boy. 

Bad Buddy (YouTube) Ep 12 fin - The bar has been raised, Thailand. This ending was unexpectedly satisfying if not typical romance-y. I give Bad Buddy a solid 9/10 mostly because of crazy good acting and all the queer affirmation and effort put in to specifically subvert damaging Thai BL tropes. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED I finished the live blog here and full review here. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Behind Cut (Korea - Viki) Ep 7 & 8 fin - honestly last week I thought this one was working itself to be something special, but then they did the old break ‘em up until a year later for no good reason K-drama (specialty of the house) and fubbed the landing. It’s fine, but no more than fine. Pretty much My Sweet Dear level so 8/10. RECOMMENDED, just don’t expect it to exceed the bounds of KBL’s narrow scope. The best bits were the dating scenes and it drifted from there. Full review here.

Color Rush 2 (Korea - Viki) Ep 1-2 - I like it. The new seme character, Se Hyun (played by Hyuk of VIXX) is a bit sinister while also reminding me a little of Sam Lin (always a good thing). Se Hyun is a very different personality from Yoo Han and I liked that they didn’t try to repeat the pattern. Frankly Hyuk is a better actor than Hwall (no offense to any B out there) and these two actors have better chemistry, even though we’ve been told this will be a bromance. Regardless, I want to find out what’s going on in this weird little universe so I’ll probubly stick with this show until the bitter end no matter what, and even knowing it’s likely to be ultimately unsatisfying. 

Rainbow Prince (Pinoy musical - YouTube) Ep 2 - Remains stupid glorious. Started out with actual 1950s level Disney tinkle music. Creepy stalker ex-bf is creepy but the prince needs a job. Honestly it’s kinda acted like its a cartoon for children. I don’t know where I am with this show but I do not care. 

The Next Door Crush (Vietnam - YouTube) Ep 4 - didn’t drop, again. I might be giving this series a dnf at this juncture. It wasn’t wowing me anyway. 

You Are My Stupid Boy Ep 1-2 (Vietnam season 2 YouTube) - is a continuation of 2 existing couples Couple 1 (Troung & Khoa) from You Are My Sunshine and Couple 2 from Stupid Boys, Stupid Love (who I like better). SBSL couple brings with them a supportive female bestie who immediately goes up against the resident faen fatalle threatening YAMS couple. AKA the Anti-Faen Fatal... explosion immanent. I like it okay, but it’s a quar project (a bit talky and slow) and you probubly should watch the first two series first. Luckily they’re on YT under the same parent channel. 

Mr Cinderella (Vietnam - YouTube) Ep 8 fin - these two are great flirts and good kissers. We got a fabulously (and quintessentially Vietnamese) domestic ending. Technically this should probubly still get a 7/10 when compared to, say, the Thai stuff, but it just that much better than previous Vietnamese BLs and I’m giving it an 8/10. RECOMMENDED. 

In Case You Missed It

Thai BL short ZMaj sort just a min music video but with a little dialogue. 2 boys work at a cafe and a breakup drives them together. That’s James (Beer in Oxygen) & Nat from upcoming Bed Friend & Middleman’s Love. 

Gossip

The Thai redo of Love Stage!! looks a lot more like the original manga or anime. I’m excited about that a lot, actually, since I was very disappointed with the Japanese live action version. It looks like Thailand is brave enough to do the cross dressing element (could go horribly wrong but Turbo is gonna be SO pretty) and Kaownah actually looks like a great Ryo, less slapstick and more of a gentleman. This series will be long enough to deal with the BL side couple of the brother and the house manager too (younger seme, older uke, plus somewhat whipping boy). So yeah, you can tell, I’m excited. It’s a first for Thailand too, doing its own adaptation of something Japan has already tackled. Let’s see how Thai they can make it! You can watch the trailer here. I might be expecting to much from this one. 

Next Week Looks Like This:

One Love (unknown) & Physical Therapy (GaGa) both start tomorrow (Sunday). Physical Therapy has been described as “bittersweet” so WATCH OUT. My Ride (unknown) is supposed to start Thurs. For Friday Enchante will be taking over Bad Buddy’s time slot (on GMMTV’s YouTube) and The Love of Winter (YouTube) also starts. Love Stage!! is supposed to start Saturday (Aisplay - no idea on international) and Restart(ed) on Sunday (unknown). 

I’ve officially given up on Tell The World I Love You. I want to see it. But doubt I ever will. It’s been nearly a year and it’s still no where near out. 

Upcoming 2022 BL master post here. It’s now static (Tumblr has locked me out of editing it). It’s a bug, please just realize I can no longer use it to keep you updated on new announcements. It’s static as of Jan 15, 2022. 

This week’s best moments?

Still living for these two cuties. 

[satansbastards]

Forgot to post but current theory on Will’s family situation.

Not sure if it actually makes much sense but I do think Janet is Will’s stepmom, mostly cause Mr. Wisp did refer to her as his wife and timelinewise it wouldn’t make sense for them to have gotten divorced and remarried to give Will a stepbrother that he also calls on birthdays and clearly has some form of history with. 

The vibes I do get since he does call her mom no hesitation is that she’s been raising him since he was young. Either that or they just have a very good relationship. Most folks I know with step-parents only call them mom or dad if they have lived with them a while or are on very good terms so that’s really all I’m basing it off of. 

 But! I am also under the assumption that David is like 8-10 years older than Will so they would have grown up together enough to have clashed the way they have and still have David be able to go off and start his own company. I cannot remember if Bizly gave David an explicitly stated age for him so that’s subject to change.

I defiintely think there’s some form of resentment from David, at least when they were younger. It’s hard when your parent starts paying attention to a new child in the home, possbily even more so when said child isn’t even blood related. Couple that with also having to deal with a new parent, new home, just a whole shift in lifestyle it could very easily cause some bitterness. 

I don’t want to form TOO strong an opinion on David yet since we’ve got so little to go off of but I really want to see what the dynamic is like with Will and David. Like is David just straight up a bad person or is he just kind of a dick who never learned to deal with his issues? 

As for Will’s birth mother. This is purely just what I think would sound cool and is not really based on any sort of facts we don’t really have any to go off of anyway at the moment.

I don’t think she’s alive, and I don’t think Will ever really met her, not enough to form a strong attachment anyway. 

I feel like it would have been interesting if she also disappeared out in the woods. Only she never came back, one of the people who just vanish. Which would make it all the more heartbreaking to think about for Will’s dad when his son also goes missing for an unspecified amount of time.