#i’m not sober rn

[inthe-dark-tonight]

i think andrew lincoln might be the ultimate dilf… the dilf of all dilfs

[stealingyourbones]

Out of all of the people The Ghost King Phantom expected to relate to, it definitely wasn’t the scrawny red headed photographer of the Daily Planet. Jimmy Olsen has gotten so many temporary superpowers over his time being Superman’s friend. Hell, he once gained a 4th dimensional being’s reality warping abilities when he was given said dimensional being’s powers during a fight. Sure there’s a dozen or so heroes with the same amount of powers he has, but none as suddenly granted to them as a all powerful god that can relate to a teenager.

[identitty-dickruption]

maybe this is just me being an alcoholic but istg everyone exaggerates about soju so so much. “I took my pants off after one soju” bestie that is not normal that is not a soju thing there is some serious placebo bullshit going on

[gravyhoney]

Sorry guys I kkeep almost posting about this guy I’m so into rn but everytime I’m like ‘ahhhh no this is cringe’ and DELETE JT and then. I remember I run a fucking LEGO NINJAGO blog sk this is actuallyyyyyyy the least cringe thing I can post. Ain’t no fucking WAYYYYYY a MAN has me giggling and kicking my feet the way this guy is what the FUCK I’m aaauughdhfbdhf sorry guys this is the worst thing I’ve ever typed out but my GODDDDDDDDD hehehehheehehehheehheeheeheheheehe i don’t think I’ve ever felt this strongly about SOME GUY as I do rn. He’s so. Idk. Augh. He makes me feel like a whole person. AND he doesn’t make me feel shame abt my interests. AND AND he respects my boundaries and isn’t expecting anything from me GUYS AUGH.

[fckthtgetmoney]

haven’t posted on this tumblr in a while butttt I have a hot take:

inside your mind (while stalkerish) really showcases Matty’s vocals and how lovely his voice is. it’s just haunting and I love it so much

[astrobei]

i am not allowed to drunk post or drunk text bc it’s embarrassing but i think seeing other people drunk post/getting drunk texted by my friends is maybe one of the best things on this planet

[starterheart]

really crazy how quick I lose all sense of balance when I start drinking. just two drinks in (and a decent amount of hits) and the floor tilts and there are walls where I dont expect them! swaying and wobbly and stumbling a little as I try my best to conceal how much of a lightweight I am, cracking open another bottle with just a little too much effort.

I probably need someone more sober than me who can actually handle their booze to help me walk steadily, their warm hands on me to guide me and keep me upright as I get wobblier n wobblier

[1ckydoggy]

THINKING ABT SUCKING HIM OFF AGAIN I NEED IT SO BAD FUCK!!!! but also I wanna shotgun in his lap and get higher and higher meanwhile he stopped taking hits and is just slowly moving my hips back and forth over his bulge… @///@

[bisexualamy]

migraine at work everybody give it up for migraine at work

[mita-vittua-olivia]

h’s ass was on k’s dick and i might never recover

[fromthehouseofgerber]

I don’t trust the fuckers that immediately kill kelvin like are you a buffoon?? You just saved him numbnuts why are you killing him you bumbling idiot

Look at you nimrod you just got rid of your only companion and now you have to get the logs and the fish and the sticks and the everythings all by yourself

I bet you feel so dumb right now *spits at your feet* lick it up coward

[mysicklove]

drunk mello be an opp bc i be craving men like no other

[ghostzzy]

ok fuck it i got my period so i am officially not going to brunch. instead i am just going to my mom’s to watch vampires, then i’ll pick up my groceries, then i’ll come home and be insane about vampires, and take a nap, and then stardew valley and vampires the night away.

[skyblueartt]

I have two coworkers obsessed with fnaf and we all explained the lore to my clueless other coworker and it was SO FUNNYYYY she was like “omg. I’m so invested now actually like oh my god???” 😭😭 she played her Henry’s speech and her FACE LMAOOO!!! When he said “my daughter, *blah blah blah* I couldn’t save you then, so let me save you now-“ she brought a hand up to her heart and it was so funny omg. I love when coworkers have the same fuckin interest it’s so funny

[astralpenguin]

also. when will europe collectively stop voting for israel. come the fuck on

[onpyre]

man idk if this is gonna work. i can live fine with stable albeit neurotic alcoholics, but living with a v emotional one is, uh, how you say, triggering