#my coworker was like ‘’I wanna be the puppet’’ and I said ‘’GIRL I | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

nadziejastar · 5 years ago

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"She’s a Mirror That Reflects You”

And Xion was a girl Roxas cared about, which made her like the girl Sora cared about. She was a reflection of Sora’s memories. “That’s why his recovery is stalling,” Riku went on. “They have the part that’s most precious to him—his memories of Kairi.”

Xion prevented Sora from waking up because she was siphoning off his most precious memories, which were the key to his awakening. She was also acting as a mirror—a puppet who was merely reflecting his most precious memories of Kairi.

He’d been dreaming. It left him in terrible anguish—a nightmare about his two best friends torn away from him because he was too weak to protect them. Because he had lost the use of the Keyblade.

He wondered if Xion had that same helplessness when she couldn’t use her Keyblade. Roxas got up and stared into space. He felt so…heavy. So tired and listless. Like he hadn’t slept at all. He just wanted to go back to sleep.

Was it because of the dreams? But he dreamed all the time. Even if he couldn’t always remember them so vividly, the dreaming was nothing new.

His reflection in the mirror was no different from usual. Maybe his eyes were a little red—probably because he was so tired.

Roxas couldn’t recover because there was a puppet draining him of his strength.

“Ugh, I’ve got enough on my plate.” He groaned, imagining Saïx’s face if he reported all this.

Those days as a trio had been so wonderful. Why did this have to happen? The memory of his heart twinged. Had the breakdown of a friendship always been this painful? It was hard to tell when he didn’t have a heart anymore.

“Don’t wanna get up…”

But he dragged himself out of bed, taking a huge stretch and cricking his neck. He had to get to the Grey Area early if he wanted to talk to Saïx. Most likely, today would be another bad day.

It’s basically what Organization XIII did to Axel, too. They replaced Isa with Saïx, a puppet created from Isa’s memories. Axel was the Organization’s puppet like Sora would have been if his memories of Kairi had been replaced with Naminé. And I would argue that Saïx was doing the exact same thing to Axel that Xion was doing to Roxas. Unbeknownst to him, his strength and energy were also being drained from him by the puppet.

Outside the window, the moon—the heart-shaped moon—floated. Axel watched it, still sprawled on his bed. There was still a little time before he had to leave on his mission.

To gather hearts, to have hearts of our own, to not let the heart mislead us…

For these past few days, I’ve been thinking about the meaning of Xemnas’ words. To not let the heart mislead us? What does that mean? Whenever I’m alone, these thoughts just float around in my head the whole time. I don’t know why I have to think so much about it. I bet the other Nobodies don’t.

The heart… emotions. I think about their origins. Contemplate it. Reason about it. When did I start doing this?

The truth was, Axel knew when. Maybe I’ve been pretending I hadn’t noticed.

This is a passage from the novel. It’s on Day 117 ~Secrets~. It’s the night before Day 118 ~Lazy Day~. The day Axel spent all day of their vacation in bed sleeping, before joking about his dark secrets to Roxas and Xion.

Yeah… I started thinking about this stuff when Roxas—no, Roxas and Xion joined the Organisation.

Those two had lobbed so many questions at him as they grew as Nobodies. Was it just their curiosity that had him thinking so much? But it hadn’t started when they joined the Organization. It was after he’d gotten to know Xion, after Castle Oblivion.

Anyhow, I have to admit that something is changing inside of me. Before this, I wouldn’t have thought about those kinds of things. Changing… why am I changing?

I called it ‘contemplating’, but it’s just rambling.

Axel felt the waver of an unexpected presence, and sat up in bed. “Don’t just barge in here—you could at least knock,” he said, in a displeased manner.

It’s also the day Axel complained in his report that Saïx was the one who changed, not him.

Saïx was standing next to the bed. Axel looked away from him and stared at a speck on the wall. However, seeming to not notice Axel’s attitude, Saïx began to speak in his usual tone.

“How has Xion been acting?”

“S’not like I’ve been keeping watch in particular, so I wouldn’t have a clue,” Axel answered in a sulky tone.

“You seem quite close,” Saïx continued.

For a moment, Axel thought about the reasons Saïx could have for being so interested in Xion.

I already know why Roxas is special. The Nobody of the Keyblade Hero is going to be special.

But, I still don’t have the information to decide how Xion is special compared to other Nobodies. I wanted to know, but now I already understand that it would be useless to ask Saïx to tell me.

“What, am I meant to report even that to you? If you don’t need anything, get out,” said Axel, getting up out of his bed with a violent movement.

Speaking of changes, my relationship with Saïx has, too. I think it’s changed slightly since I’ve had time with Roxas and Xion. I couldn’t really say how, though.

Even in this scene, what’s going through Axel’s mind is that his relationship with Saïx has changed. It’s written to be mostly similar to the game, but there’s an interesting addition to this scene...

“You and Xion are on the same mission today.”

“Thank you ever so much for going to all the trouble to tell me that,” Axel answered, facing the mirror and starting to get ready.

“I need you to go to Castle Oblivion again soon.” Saïx glared at Axel’s reflection, their eyes meeting in the mirror.

“Orders from ‘Lord’ Xemnas?” Axel asked, lips curling.

...A mirror. And I’m sure that was done with very much symbolic meaning in mind.

Saïx didn’t reply to that. “That castle still has secrets. Even there, there are unknown places—”

“Unknown places?” Axel interrupted. He turned his gaze back on his own reflection in the mirror. “You’re talking about that chamber. I’ve scoured the place and I haven’t found it. It won’t be discovered that easily.”

The tension in Saïx’s pursed lips slackened a little. “Very well, I’ll tell you something you’d like to hear. Xion was born in that castle. Just like Naminé was, in that castle.” Saïx was silent for a moment. “The place Naminé and Xion were born—sounds like a place you’d like to go, am I right?”

That’s bait. But there’s no skill in simply taking the bait.

Axel snorted and turned to Saïx. “Well, well, well… it sounds like the one who wants to go to that castle isn’t me, it’s you, am I right?” Axel said, as he stepped past Saïx, out of his field of vision. “Cause if you go to the chamber that Xemnas is searching for—you’ll figure out his true goal, right?”

Because he’s finding it increasingly hard to recognize Saïx as Isa anymore.

“The Chamber of Repose, and its twin, the Chamber of Waking,” Saïx began, back still turned.

“Xemnas has a goal that he hasn’t told anyone. A clue towards it should be in the Chamber of Waking. If we can get our hands on it, we’ll have the advantage in every conceivable way—for our goal, too.” At that last word, Saïx turned and looked at Axel.

I know… our goal. That part won’t change.

Axel sighed, and said, “Vexen and Zexion were in your way. That’s why they were taken care of—so you’d reach the top of the Organisation, right?”

It’s almost like I’m telling myself this.

Because he’s not Isa. He’s Xehanort masquerading as Isa.

Us not having hearts doesn’t mean our behavior means nothing.

It doesn’t mean we can’t think. Doesn’t mean we don’t have goals. Acting for the sake of those is something both humans and Nobodies share.

“I do the dirty work, so you better get to the top.” I’m not lying when I tell him this.

Axel looked as Saïx. Saïx stared back.

Yeah… we have a goal. That part won't change.

Saïx turned his back on Axel.

“In a few days, you’ll be sent to Castle Oblivion on a solo mission. Be expecting it,” said Saïx, leaving the room.

Alone, Axel clenched his fists, and followed Saïx out of the room.

Axel is just as much trapped by an illusion as Roxas and Sora. An illusion that keeps him trapped by his most precious memories. But the mirror has to break at some point.

Xion got up and looked in the mirror.

It’s me. Nothing new.

After getting ready for the day, she went to the Grey Area and found Saïx and Xigbar there.

Xion also had a habit of looking in the mirror. The first time she does, Xigbar and Saïx are there.

Xion washed her face and looked in the mirror. Nothing out of the ordinary about her reflection.

I’m the same as ever.

Then she left her room and headed for the lobby. Depending on when she showed up, she would run into some of her coworkers and miss others. Today she found no one there except Saïx and Xigbar.

Xigbar and Saïx are there again the second time, too.

Xion got up and took care of her morning routine in front of the mirror in the corner of the room.

I’m the same as ever.

And yet, I’m not.

She stared hard at the mirror’s reflection. It showed…someone else. But she knew who it was.

The boy who looked like Roxas.

For a moment, she lowered her gaze, then looked again.

Just her.

Her and her identity crisis. Xion laughed at herself.

I have time here. Riku gave it to me.

But not forever. I’ll ruin everything if I stay. I have to decide…before the Organization decides for us.

The third time, she’s alone. Something’s different. She doesn’t recognize her reflection for a moment. This is the day she runs away in Wonderland, and Xigbar and Axel are there. This is also the day Axel told Roxas that Xion was a mirror. I’m excited to see how the KH3D novel writes this scene when it’s localized. It think Axel looking at his reflection while wondering where Braig and Isa were was...intentional, to say the least.

#kh meta #kh axel #kh saix #kh leaisa #kh akusai

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