#i’m going to assume the quality will die but i don’t care

[goldensunset]

like a lighthouse to guide you home

[shenanigans-and-imagines]

hey! hc questions for Astarion & ace! Tav (sorry if some of those have already been answered):

- Who picks flowers for the other?

- Who has a hobby only the other knows about?

- How do they hype each other up?

- How do they express their feelings?

- Who's more protective?

- Who gets jealous easier?

thank you for your work! I always get excited when I see you have posted something new about this ship ^^

Who picks flowers for the other?

Tav does it for Astarion. I know there is some dialogue about him not liking flowers, but it’s different when they’re a gift from his love.

Tav never buy them. They just collect a small bundle as their walking. They then arrange them in a vase or spare cup, accompanied by a story; some local legend or tale about the flowers or just something they make up on the spot, Astarion can never be sure. Still he listens attentively as the story is just as much part of the gift as the flowers themselves.

Who has a hobby only the other knows about?

Tav knows about Astarion’s many tries at different hobbies.

Post game Astarion finally has the time to figure out what exactly he likes to do. Yes, there’s reading, but he figures out he genuinely enjoys embroidering and sewing. Making something with his own two hands and having something tangible at the end is extremely satisfying. Plus, it helps him clear his mind of anything besides the task in front of him. He’s since expanded this to jewelry making and knitting. Although he’ll die before he admits the knitting part.

How do they hype each other up?

Compliments. Compliments all around.

Astarion specifically goes on and on about Tav’s immense musical talent. Tav is already fairly secure in their abilities, but having somebody in the audience they know truly loves their work is heartening.

As for Tav, they know Astarion has his vanity and is willing to indulge him, complimenting him on his looks and choice of clothing. And if they throw an “I love you” at the end of it, he won’t say no.

How do they express their feelings?

I’m going to just assume you mean their feelings toward each other since if I went through all the emotions we’d be here all day.

Tav is actually a very physically affectionate person who has been denied it for years. Once they get permission to show their love that way, they don’t stop. Hugs for certain, leaning against him, hand kisses, cuddling, they’re all in. Quality time is next on the list. They don’t care what they’re doing so long as they’re doing it together.

Astarion is more verbal in his affections. He’ll just tell Tav how beautiful, talented, and amazing he finds them. He teases and tries to make them laugh. He can be quite the poet when he puts his mind to it. I’ll also add physical affection to the list. It takes him time, but once he understands he’s safe, he doesn’t want to loses the feeling of having them close.

Who’s more protective?

Astarion.

Not to say Tav isn’t, because they are, but it’s less visceral than Astarion. He spent so much of his life afraid that even when he does get together with Tav, it doesn’t lessen his fear. If anything his more afraid because he has somebody to lose for the first time in centuries. He considers ascending not just to keep himself safe, but to ensure he can protect Tav, forever. He’s never felt this way before about anyone. There’s no telling what he’d be willing to do for them.

Who gets jealous easier?

Hard to say. They both have their moments. I’d say Astarion is more vocal while Tav let’s it build up over time.

If somebody is flirting with Tav at a tavern, he’s by their side the next second with an arm around their waist and a smile that’s all fangs. He can also get real petty if he feels like they’re giving other people too much attention over him.

If somebody flirts with Astarion, Tav doesn’t say anything because they don’t want Astarion thinking he’s trying to control him or “too much”. But it hurts and if it happens too many times they’ll crack and ask if Astarion is getting bored of them. It would’ve be the first time. It’d take a lot for Tav to admit they’re jealous, but once they do, Astarion would have a field day.

They’re both working on getting better about it. It’s not a pretty thing.

[annabtg]

Can I ask why you like James? Everything he and his friends did are toxic male traits. They deserved to be expelled for how they treated Snape. All that guy wanted to do was study and spend time with the girl he loved. Snape shouldn’t have called her a mudblood but that was provoked by James. That guy had ruined Snape’s future and made him turn to the dark arts. How can you support someone like that?. Lily was in love with Snape and I’m certain James snuck a love potion to her or manipulated her into thinking Snape was evil. Snape deserved a happy ending with Lily, and he would have been a better father to Harry than James ever could have. Unfortunately, James arrogant and bullying personality rubbed off on his son. I don’t get how you people can like character like that. Snape deserved Lily because he loved her more than James ever could have.

Is this 2015 Quora?

Well, I meant to get some writing done, but there's always the afternoon, I suppose. I can never resist an opportunity to ramble about my favourite characters!

Can I ask why you like James?

Sure you can (case in point) but why do you care? Do I know you? Do you read my writing? It doesn't seem like it, because he has a central role in it, often highlighted with tags such as "James Potter is a Little Shit", so you'd have an idea already. You're probably just asking to distract me from writing more fic about him. Slightly bothersome, but ultimately beneficial to my essay-writing skills.

Everything he and his friends did are toxic male traits.

As a pharmacist, I will tell you that the dose makes the poison. Anything can be toxic if you take enough of it.

They deserved to be expelled for how they treated Snape.

They did die in the end, which I understand is not as good a punishment as being expelled, but it will have to do.

All that guy wanted to do was study and spend time with the girl he loved.

Spending time with the girl you love is only a nice and honourable thing if she also wants the same thing. If she tells you she's not interested, it's creepy and disgusting.

Snape shouldn’t have called her a mudblood but that was provoked by James.

I fail to understand how a boy who can't even begin to utter the word and is obviously smitten with a girl, can convince another boy to call that same girl a racial slur. It seems rather counterintuitive.

That guy had ruined Snape’s future and made him turn to the dark arts.

Okay listen, I know that working with teens can be a pain sometimes but overall getting a job with tenure at the most prestigious magic school of Britain at the age of 19 is hardly a ruined future. I have many friends who would turn to the dark arts for it.

How can you support someone like that?

Well, he's hot and I have a thing for arrogant smart-arses.

Lily was in love with Snape and I’m certain James snuck a love potion to her or manipulated her into thinking Snape was evil.

Wait, no, we're not on 2015 Quora. 2015 Quora would be claiming that Lily was an ungrateful bitch who treated Snape so badly even though the poor sod loved her with all his life. Because honestly, we never see her showing any kind of love towards Snape. She's always lashing out at him or trying to get something out of him. So self-centered.

Snape deserved a happy ending with Lily, and he would have been a better father to Harry than James ever could have.

As the wonderfully loving way he treated Harry in the books proves beyond doubt, I assume?

Unfortunately, James arrogant and bullying personality rubbed off on his son.

I'm going to have to play the scientist card again but I have to inform you that genes don't work quite like that.

I don’t get how you people can like character like that.

Does this post help at all?

Snape deserved Lily because he loved her more than James ever could have.

Lily was a whole person and could choose her own partner. If she would rather marry the guy who loved her less, that's on her, not on James. I suppose he must have had some qualities that compensated for his less-than-perfect love.

[feminist-space]

Tweet thread from broadwaybabyto:

"“I got Covid but it was worth it!” feels like the pinnacle of our misguided “you do you” approach to the pandemic.

It’s airborne - it’s not just about YOU. Even if you’ve decided being sick was worth it - what about the unlucky people who cross your path & get infected.

People who may not have attended an event, vacation, concert or whatever high risk activity you felt was worth the risk?

There’s many people in public for work or other unavoidable reasons. People not just having fun. You’re risking their health when you take no precautions.

If you use the DNC as example - people are proudly proclaiming that they knew the risk (though did they? Really?) and chose to attend anyways.

I would argue that you can never truly understand the risk since no one “expects” to get Long Covid or die.

But even if we go along with their rationale and assume they knew the risk & felt it was worthwhile… what about the people who were working the event? Staff at the venue, people on public transit, working in nearby hotels or at the airport? People serving them food?

Did THOSE people consent to the risk? Of course not. Many of them are working minimum wage jobs that they need to survive - not attending “fun” events and then making light of catching a serious disease.

They had NO choice or say in the matter.

Mitigations cost money. Many people can’t afford high quality respirators, air filters, nose sprays and mouthwashes (let alone expensive treatments like Paxlovid).

It’s often those who can’t afford the best protection who are exposed the most. We don’t talk about that enough.

...

It’s infuriating when you’re high risk and already disabled like me. We are TERRIFIED. We know people are out there knowingly positive and not masking. We know people are refusing to take precautions because they don’t think THEY are high risk. And we end up paying the price.

I’m not saying you can’t “live your life”… but why can’t you live your life in a more responsible manner? Demand clean air and upgraded ventilation in public spaces. Wear a mask. If you’re sick - stay home. If you attend a high risk event - mask afterwards & test regularly.

There are ways to do all the things you WANT to do without putting innocent people in harms way. Without risking the lives and health of others who are actively invested in avoiding spreading (or catching) covid. It CAN be done.

Finally - if the idea of infecting and harming someone else isn’t enough to sway you - consider this:

Most people suffering from severe Long Covid didn’t think they would become disabled either. They didn’t think they were high risk. They thought the risk was “worth it”.

We’ve been led to believe “only the vulnerable” are at risk - but the truth is everyone can get Long Covid. Many people are extra vulnerable and don’t even realize it. Repeat infections increase your odds as well.

Some of the sickest Long Covid patients I’ve met were young and healthy when they became sick. Many had mild acute infections but then decompensated over the weeks & months that followed.

The same could happen to you. The only way to avoid Long Covid is to avoid Covid.

Please reconsider saying your infection was “worth it.” Wear a mask. Care about the risk you pose to others.

If you’re struggling - reach out. There are many people here (myself included) who will happily give advice on mitigations and ways to keep yourself & others safe.

We are truly all in this together - people are just refusing to accept that fact. The sooner we acknowledge that we will succeed or fail together - the sooner real change can come."

Read the full thread here: https://x.com/broadwaybabyto/status/1827907305603559725

[cody-paranatural]

do you have any pnat headcanons? :3

YES I DO.

I have!!!! A lot of them!!!!!

I will try to keep this relatively short but we’ll see how this goes lol.

Okay! So in no particular order:

- I need to get this one off of my chest. I don’t care about the wifi-spider from the twitter thing Spender is GAY. He got confused when a woman assumed he was asking her out 😭 The closest he’s ever been to ‘dating’ a woman was when he desperately asked Mina if she would pretend to be his date to one of his dad’s galas bc he was DESPERATE to keep them from realizing he was gay. But she really didn’t want to go there and so it ended up being the first gala he ditched completely and had a way better time because of it. It was the start of him actually being able to admit that he HATES living like this. I will die on this hill I cannot see this man as bisexual. Jean IS bi though.

- In my mind Mina is 100% the person Ms Baxter was referring to when she said she ditched her goth phase after a bad breakup in junior year. They’re exes. To ME. I want this to be true so bad.

- I don’t know why I started with the adults but I’m sticking by it for now. Anyway you literally can’t convince me that June and Shrike weren’t briefly a Thing in the past. It’s so real to me. I don’t think Shrike would’ve told June about her evil vampire fling turned boyfriend turned husband. But for comedic purposes if June DID know she would be so “I’m so happy for you and your ugly boyfriend” about it.

- Peter and June are so t4t and bi4bi. So are Shrike and Davy actually but I don’t know if the world is ready for that one. Listen I’m just saying that the Shrike timeline would get much simpler if you assume she wasn’t the one with the baby.

- Cody was a REALLY ugly baby. I needed a jumping point to get to the kids and this is one I feel strongly about. Because listen. He’s a cute little guy NOW. But this is a “butterfly was a caterpillar first” kinda situation. He needed to exorcise all the ugly genes he got from Davy as soon as possible. He suffered enough he deserves to look like his mother okay.

- I love the school store gang they’re all literally my best friends so here’s how I think the group came to be. To me Jeff and Violet live in the same neighborhood, and their parents are friends so they’ve been hanging out for a while. Very shortly before they started first grade they run into Ed, who got distracted by a spirit or something like that and ended up getting split up from Izzy and also maybe Dimitri. They had one fun day together and then saw each other at school and boom. They’re besties now :] And later on they ended up befriending my beloved weird girl herself Lisa Paranatural. I think she just like, sat next to them one day and became part of the group. No one can really tell when or how it happened it just did. It’s like she’s always been there. And Cody was the last one to join them. Until proven otherwise I just think that he most likely went to the rich kid elementary school, and didn’t meet any of them until the start of 6th grade. You CAN become that close with someone in a little over a year. It happened to me. And Max got attached to the activity club in a week so anything’s possible. The world is my oyster.

- I think Jeff has an older sister :] He just gives me that vibe, like he’s a younger brother FOR SURE. Also literally everyone is his family as a silly name, it’s a tradition. One of his mom is named Jedextraordinary Flavors or something equally as silly.

- Speaking of Jeff, he writes poetry. This is mostly inspired by him talking about the symbolism of his pencil and his desk in chapter 1. He’s 12 so it’s of very questionable quality, but he has a lot of fun with it.

- Isaac is a trans girl. And Violet is a non binary trans guy. These two are very important because I will be using my headcanon pronouns for them here ^-^

- Isaac and Cody don’t really know each other in real life but they DO know each other on like a Twilight forum. And they fight all the time. I think Cody really likes reading vampire novels. I think he finds the inaccuracies very funny. And Isaac genuinely really loves Twilight but would sooner Die than admit it bc she is terrified of being seen as cringe. They are interested in completely different aspects of the Twilight universe and also Cody clearly loves drama, just look at how he talks about the student council stuff. I just think it would be very funny okay.

- In a similar vein Cody listens to The Fever sometimes (DJ Mothman and Professor Bigfoot’s radio station) On page 49 he found what they had to say about Shrike funny so I think he’d enjoy hearing what else they have to say, though only to laugh at it. Where as Stephen takes it very seriously. I think any supernatural related conversation between Stephen and Cody would be Very Funny, but I also like to think that if they ever actually became friends it would start with them talking about the Fever.

- Sege’s full name has GOT to make up the word sergeant somehow. Either his middle name is Anthony or his last name is straight up the word ant or something that contains it. Serge is my special funny guy i needed to include him.

- Since Isaac’s parents are just irish Goku and irish Sailor moon I think her aunt should be irish Miku. I think her whole extended family just looks Like That. They’re all EXTREMELY normal though. They’r personalities don’t match their designs AT ALL. Isaac absolutely does not see the resemblance between his family members and the characters they look like and she’s the only one and it drives everyone else CRAZY

- This is more of a general headcanon but I think that at some point a spectral uploaded a photo they took where the spirits are doing something really stupid, but the action is treating it SO seriously. And it breaches contentment and spawns two different memes. The spectral version where people are hyping up the lamest spirits they’ve seen and the non-spectral interpretation of it where people think the joke is that there’s NOTHING in the photo.

- I think at some point in high school Isabel and Max get to be buzzcut brothers. Isabel fucked up her bangs so bad after impulsively cutting them that she decided that she’s just gonna go bald for a bit. Ed helped. It’s a good look on her but I don’t think she would stick by it all that long.

- This one is mostly a joke. But I think that at some point while saying his very questionable conspiracy theories Stephen somehow got everything spectral and spirit related 100% right, and then immediately decided that this theory is kinda stupid actually and decided that bigfoot makes way more sense

- Also. In my beautiful mind Cash Reward is gonna have puppies at some point. Because I want to see Stephen being WAYYY too invested in being a dog uncle (Cash Reward is like a sibling to them, you see)

- I think Isabel will really get into miniature crafting in high school. I don’t really have a good reasoning for this one, I think it’s something she started because it didn’t really seem like her thing, but it just ended up being something she really ended up enjoying after a while. This one might be me projecting a little though because I kinda want to get into it :P

- Dimitri learns how to code in his free time. It started because Suzy REALLY wanted the journalism club to have its own website, but was too impatient to learn it herself. So she decided that their editor guy should do it. And Dimitri ended up really enjoying himself. I think he and Ed tried to make a little game together at some point but had WILDLY different ideas for what they wanted it to be so it didn’t really end up going anywhere

- Ed learns how to play several instruments just because they can. This one is so true to real to me and I don’t even know why. They can play kazoo and the ukulele for SURE. They get an otamatone when they’re older. A harmonica too, perhaps.

[maxwell-grant]

(SPIDERVERSE SPOILERS TIMES TWO)

I looked through camrips and tried putting together as many tidbits of dialogue as I could from that split-second comic cover interlude, since those tend to foreshadow the dialogue of the scenes in question. There’s some others I can’t make out due to image quality and we’ll have to wait for the streaming release to see more, but in the meanwhile I was able to make out these speech bubbles. I’m using “-” to fill in missing parts:

“Uncle Aaron!”

“-how much you need what I got and, trust me, that'll be the beginning of a whole new family business. Kid, your dad should be proud of you no matter what. Not making you scared to come out from behind that mask.”

“Yeah, that whole “Not-” thing

“Uncle Aaron, you can say whatever. But I can't let you kill this guy. I just can't.”. “Yeah, I-”

“You and I are going to take care of a bad guy. A real bad guy”. ”Who?”

(I’m assuming the named villain is Scorpion since the name starts with S-c-o and there’s a P, and also with the following line)

(images compiled by @tokyofro​)

“Did you look up the Scorpion on the web?” “Yes Uncle Aaron, I did”. “Then you know I wasn’t lying, he’s a dangerous cat”.  “What does this have to do with-”. “You wanna be a superhero, now’s your chance”

“You ran away? YOU RAN AWAY?! Is that the kind of man you are?

MILES: “You really don’t care who you hurt? What did the world do to you to make you think it’s okay for you to be this way? 

So my theory, going off by these and particularly the “What did the world do to you?” line from Miles and (presumably) Prowler!Miles telling him that they’re going to go after “a real bad guy”, is that Prowler!Miles is going to be exploring the idea of Miles Morales turned villain protagonist/anti-hero. It seems to be picking and uniting separate strands like Prowler’s original role as a darker counterpart to Spider-Man / a gadget-wielding morally compromised crimefighter who eventually turns face / Spider-Man-as-Batman, Earth-616 Miles being a villain, and Miles’s contentious relationship with his original setting and current status as an Ultimate Marvel refugee who quite literally jumped ship from the darker and all-around shittier home universe he was meant to be in, among others, to consolidate them into Miles’ confrontation with himself.

The first Spiderverse shows a lot how strongly Miles listens to and respects and values the input from his uncle (and vice versa, only Miles is able to bring Aaron out of the Prowler mask, even when Aaron knows he’s going to die the second he hesitates and uses that second to shield Miles’ identity), and he’s looking for guidance, someone to model himself after, because he’s a very intelligent kid trying to live up to the potential everyone keeps telling him he has, trying to live up to what his parents worked so hard to give him. He finds role models in Spider-Man and an entire group of Spider-People there to lead by example and catch him when he falls, and with his uncle giving his life away to not only save him, but urge him to stay on the right path. It wasn’t just meeting Peter Parker at the collider that saved Miles, it was rising up to the challenge in Spiderverse 1 and Uncle Aaron using his last breath to shut the door on Miles making the mistakes he did, and so Miles makes himself into the Spider-Man his world needs, filling in a spot needed upon left vacant.

Whether Earth-42 was supposed to have a proper Peter Parker Spider-Man and that never came to pass, or it was supposed to have it’s own Miles Morales get bitten and become Spider-Man like the Spot flashback indicates, Earth-42 Miles is what happens when none of that comes to pass. No Spider-Man protecting the world, no spider bite and sacrifice to pass along the mantle, no pressure and assistance from Aunt May and the others who’ve been there and can help him if he can help himself first, no Spider-Man mentors to show him the ropes, Jefferson dead and his mom having to struggle with Aaron’s help to get by, supervillain cartels burning the streets down, and the only person who can remotely help is his uncle, who will never get the heroic sacrifice or wake-up call to change his ways or inspire his nephew to strive for something better. Because there isn’t anything better, and if there is, it isn’t here, someone took it away. After all, Miles and Aaron don’t show any surprise upon hearing about all that different dimension spider-power talk, and whether they know or even blame Miles for taking the opportunity that was theirs, they’ll hardly be that thrilled to meet someone who clearly had better opportunities than they did, if he can talk about them being good guys with choices to be better.

It’s possible that Prowler! Miles isn’t even that much of a villain, or even as much of a mercenary as Uncle Aaron was as the Prowler. It’s possible, and far more tragic if so, if becoming the Prowler was simply as good as it got for this earth’s Miles. If it was the only way they could survive in a Sinister Six-run city and make ends meet and provide Rio with enough to get by, if it was all they could strive for in a world where there is nothing and no one to show a better way, or even if this is the only way Miles can help anyone and make amends for the sacrifice of his father, as most Spider-Men do upon losing their loved ones. Whether this Miles has never had any positive examples to follow, or worse, he once did and this is the best he can do in living up to them. Because on Spidey’s shadow, lives The Prowler, Spider-Man when forced to play by Batman rules.

No web swinging and super speed, so the motorbike will have to do. No healing powers or toughness, the body armor can only take so much. Incapacitating-yet-non-lethal thunderstrikes at your fingertips and invisibility are not an option (although MAN wouldn’t those be convenient for a caped burglar, huh), so you settle for high-tech murder claws and hope those and the camouflage do the trick in protecting you for another day. No guiding superheroes with your best interests in mind, only super-criminals and the only one of those you lucked into being on your family’s side. Your survival dangling on a knife’s edge, so if you don’t take that knife and use it, the next guy to take it won’t be so kind. Traits that are no stranger to Spider-Man stories or related characters, whether they predate him or follow in his example.

(Left-to-right: The Spider by Dan Schkade, Taylor Hebert (Worm) fan-art by tactilescream)

Or, what happens when your bug-themed crimefighter, with lots of personal baggage and trauma and flaws to contend with from the get-go, is thrust headfirst into surviving and defeating an endlessly escalating superpower-backed war on crime against which they are hopelessly outmatched, with no Spider-Safety Net status quo and super powers to catch them, as they fall and keep falling and keep weaving bigger handbaskets to catch larger handfuls of hell inside, because that’s what it means to be “the only thing standing between this city and oblivion” when you can’t juggle cars but everyone around you can, and they are more than willing to toss them at you and your mother and uncle whether you can fight back or not, so you might as well be able to, right?

And so we get the battle between Miles Morales of Earth-1610, who’s spent two movies proving himself to be not just as good a Spider-Man as any other, but The Most Spider-Man, the Spider-Man who’s the ultimate underdog and pariah as well as the ultimate fighter and scrapper, who beats hundreds of others to try and upend their ultimate fate. Versus the Miles Morales of Earth-42, his shadow come to roost, the one who could be anything except be Spider-Man, and so he can settle for being Not-Spider-Man until he can catch the real deal, and then they’ll have much to do together.

[siryouarebeingmocked]

Jack Reacher: The Secret (is that little bro fell off)

The Jack Reacher thriller series was created by Lee Child. It's very popular. Like a lot of authors, he handed it off to someone else; his brother Andrew.

And maybe it's the placebo effect, but I've noticed a drop in quality. Full spoilers for various books.

A previous book revolved around a Russian misinformation operation on American soil, and ransomware. Came out 2020.

The Secret is from 2023, and set in 1992, when Reacher was still an Army MP. It involves a series of murders connected to an American weapons development programed outsourced to the third-world. 

Which killed a lot of people, but it was covered up.

The killers are a pair of sister trying to find the people responsible. By killing and interrogating them. Not in that order. They're very good at infiltrating, beating up, and killing people. 

They're supposed to be an evil version of Reacher, who is bad at infiltration but is good at hurting people. And, of course, all three are smart investigators.

There's one fight scene where one of the girls goes for a target and runs into multiple male guards. Who mostly lemming train directly into her fists and/or feet. In fact, it heads straight into narm. She drops two guys before one tries to shoot her or really defend himself, and only the fourth, the team leader, stays out of fist range.

You know, basic tactics that any bodyguard, cop, or trained operative should probably know.

Plus, common sense.

While she's busy beating them up, she has enough spare brain cells to think about the situation and come up with a plan. Which she executes on the last guy. 

She surrenders, he has some generic sneers about teasing his men for being beaten by a girl, safety-cuffs her, offers a generic sexual threat, and she comes up with an story that sends the surveillance team outside away.

Then she drops the team lead, and sneers at him and his men for underestimating a woman.

This is a running theme.

I think it would've been better if the lead was actually concerned about his men. Make him a little less of a speed bump. You could even leave in the sexism.

The irony is, Reacher usually sticks to highly practical moves. Our girl does go for things like throat strikes, but also a high kick. Which is, I've read, rather impractical.

I certainly don’t have the flexibility to check. Even on a dummy. I may never have had it.

And frankly, it's perfectly reasonable to assume someone who is cuffed is not much of a threat.

For contrast, Reacher's next scene? He beats up four generic mooks between him and a source. He's done this several times in the series, but this time it seems pretty short and token.

I assume they wanted to keep it moving, because of pacing.

This is a series that has had a lot of capable and well-developed female characters. So this seems like an odd theme to include at this point. And it turns out the real villain of the piece is Secretary of Defense. 

No, wait, it's actually his wife. 

Who people underestimate and overlook.

Including the two killers.

Which kills them.

Oh look, irony.

The girls aren't really complex. Basically, they're Black Widow. A pair of generic foreign female infiltrators and CQC experts. Even their quest to get revenge for their father doesn't really matter, because we don't see any other evidence of their bond with him.

I think the most we get is some verbal discussion near the climax. Telling, nto showing.

And it's not like they care about the hundreds of other people who were killed and covered up. Just their dad. 

So no "Pet the Dog" moments.

Now, I'm aware that popular fiction is often Topical™. That doesn't make it bad. EG Die Hard; western terrorists, environmentalism, and Japanese business were all topical.

A previous Lee book during Reacher's MP days revolved around a closeted gay couple. Lee also wrote a 2016 book about European Neo-Nazis, and the very second book was about a far-right militia. And they were pretty good. 

I get the impression Lee leans left-wing, but so what?

It just feels like Andrew is a lot less subtle about this.

And that's coming from someone who's enjoyed books by a literal socialist.

[blindchandelure]

Fucking hell. We had another argument, for an even stupider reason.

After dinner, I offered to help with the dishes. My mom said Dad was already helping her, and they didn’t need a third person in the kitchen, so I ought to go turn the TV on while I waited for them to finish.

So I started a movie. My dad came over after a few minutes and asked if I wanted dessert. I said no. I assumed that once the dishes were done, he and Mom would sit and watch the movie with me while they ate their cake.

But then after twenty minutes I looked up and realized they were..gone?? I eventually found them on the other side of the house, eating their cake without me.

And I got sad, so I was like, why would you tell me to put a movie on if you didn’t want to watch it? If the dishes are done, why did you leave me all alone in the living room?

And my dad says: well, you said you didn’t want dessert.

I said: you could’ve told me you were going to eat the cake over here, in this other room, and I would’ve turned the TV off, and came over here, and sat and talked with you while you ate. I just wanted to spend time with you.

Mom said I was “trying to control which room she ate in” and from there it just fucking escalated.

She told me she doesn’t want me to visit her house ever again. She flipped me off, told me I made her too upset to eat, and threw her uneaten cake in the garbage. Then, she threw a Christmas card at my head.

“You wrote ‘I love you’ in the card, but it’s a lie, you don’t care!” etc. -_-

I apologized to her, told her it wasn’t my intention to upset her, and all I wanted was to spend quality time with her.

She wouldn’t calm down and started screaming that she wants to die, and that it will be my fault if my dad dies, because I’m going to upset him and give him a heart attack.

…I can still hear her sobbing rn. I feel bad, but I don’t know what to do. T_T

[livmightlive]

Hierarchy:

All vampires are related to one of six original vampires and all are related to the Proud Vampire Mother. 

This relation is not quite genetic, they do share venom with vampires from the same sire or greatest sire (whichever OG vampire they’re related to) but it is not the same as human blood relations. What I’m trying to say is that it’s not incest for two vampires with the same sire to date ToT

That being said, found family tropes are common so that often deters vampires under the same sire from dating each other. Opinions on this probably differ from vampire to vampire. 

There are technically 7 original vampires, though 6 came from the first. The first vampire was born sometime during the dawn of man. She would go on to sire 6 prodgenies together, the 7 of them would be referred to as sevens, with Pride being the first. Her wearabouts remain unknown and have remained unknown for thousands of years. It’s assumed she is either dead or in hibernation, similar to a volcano. 

The rest of the original vampires would be incredibly power, equivalent to weak gods. Each has a different skill set and type of vampiric power. I haven’t really fleshed them out too well but they correlate with their namesakes. 

Sireing a vampire takes significant effort, similar to having a child. The way they’re turnt is pretty basic, the sire drains most of their blood and injects an IMMENSE amount of venom. Much more than is typically released in a normal feeding. 

Also similar to having a child, sires cannot sire an infinite number of fledglings. To sire one typically takes at least 5 years of care and a lot of venom. The time it takes for the amount of venom it takes to turn a person is roughly 2 years. Technically if a sire were to take an “absent parent role” they could sire a fledgling every two years but without care, the fledgling would likely die quickly. Most vampires don’t end up sireing another vampire and those that do often keep their numbers small.

The fledgling will be very dependent on their sire for the first 5 years or so. In this time the fledgling will mostly feed from the sire and rely on them to familiarize them with their new abilities and body. Usually this forms a bond between the two parties. While most vampires can become independent after a few years under their sire, many stay longer. If this process is interrupted by separating the sire and fledgling development can be stunted or damaged. Unbalanced and impulsive vampires are often the result. A lot of bad vampire stereotypes come from improperly sired vampires who struggle to control feeding impulses. 

Fledglings who are seperated from their sires can recover if another vampire steps in as a sire or if their original sire returns even years later. Adoptive sires might not be able to raise a fledgling to the ability their original sire could have, especially if they don’t share relation to an original sire, however there’s little difference in quality if the adoptive sire is committed.

The strength and power a vampire has is directly related to how many times removed they are from the First Vampire, Pride, whether or not their own sire is alive and the number of fledglings their sire had, and whether or not they’ve killed other vampires. 

When a vampire sires a fledgling, their fledgling typically inherits somewhere between 1 to 3 quarters of their sires power. In rare cases it can be more or less. In long lines of vampires, this power typically weakens with each new generation. 

When a sire dies, their power disperses and divides amongst their living fledglings in a phenomenon dubbed inheritance. If a fledgling’s sire sired many fledglings, they will receive less power from their sire than one that sired fewer fledglings.

If a vampire were to kill another and consume all their blood, they could stop the inheritance phenomenon instead absorbing around half that vampire’s power all to their self. Sires with many fledglings, or powerful vampires in general, are at risk of other vampires slaying them for their power. 

Most vampires are related to Lust and Gluttony making up close to half of the vampire population. This is followed by Envy related vampires who make up close to 1/5th of the population. Greed, Wrath, and Sloth make up the rest of the population in that order. 

I have much more to this au, I just don’t have it written down yet!

[chaoticace2005]

My reactions to Good Omens S2:

Episode 1

-wait Crowley backstory?

-they knew each other? I’m screaming

-okay Crowley maybe don’t brush off your future husband like that?

-angel Crowley is such a nerd

-oof Aziraphale, don’t worry in 6000+ years Crowley will only be thinking that about you

-and yeah of course Crowley is already questioning things

-I’m sure they could object to that

-HE DID THE WING THING

-is starmaker Crowley gonna be something actually discussed??

-also im just now thinking that in s1 only Crowley introduced himself and in s2 only aziraphale did

-yeah… aziraphale is not gonna like the “angle” thing

-THERE WERE LOCKDOWNS

-aziraphale really just adopted someone huh

-“I’m very good at forgiveness, it’s one of my favorite things” dude you’re too good for this world

-yep Crowley is having an existential crisis

-oh hi Gabriel

-yeah aziraphale is about to be in for a rude awakening

-aww they’re cute

-oh wow aziraphale stop lying

-okay does this guy have both types of amnesia

-okay but there was a fly in the box so… beezelbub?

-okay Crowley I’m sure there’s more reasons than just those 3

-okay he really just chugged that

-aww she’s cute

-oof Maggie

-okay him and Crowley are already killing me

-yeah Crowley is having a mental breakdown

-“hell me take care of him”, shfhsh

-“he’s smoking”

-oh dang the old, lock them in a room together

-okay they’re really a human aziraphale and Crowley

-yep Lindsay sucks

-love how aziraphale is pretending not to look interested

-this is a complete flip from s1 where Crowley has to convince aziraphale to get involved

Episode 2

-CROWLEY NO

-DUDE STOP KILLING GOATS

-oh him and Muriel knew each other

-love how aziraphale really doesn’t want anyone to buy books

-Crowley archangel?!

-the fact that they have to make the place accessible

-oof I thought Jim was just invisible, turns out archangels really are just so self involved

-they have to be matchmakers dhdhdhdh

-yeah I’d be scared too if that Crowley was looking for my children

-THEY REMEMBER THEY KNEW EACHOTHER AS ANGELS

-Crowley got aziraphale into food?!

-Yeah the angels are gonna be confused about childbirth

-“OUR CAR”

-THERES A GOOD OMENS BOOK

-okay was last season just Crowley falling for aziraphale and this one is the opposite

Episode 3

-aww they’re cute

-Crowley’s moving in

-awww they’re cute

-ooh why’s beezelbub so anxious?

-awww Crowley gets quality time with his son

-Crowley really is stuck on the rain

-is this gonna be Crowley and aziraphale taking care of kids throughout the years?

-Crowley is fucking high

-fudgfhdhdh Crowley

-“blessings to twitter and Grindr”… yeah I’ll give blessings to one of them

-protective Crowley!

Episode 4:

-“Lesi”?

-dude, do NOT let her into your car

-“you don’t seem his type at all” babe wtf

-“I REMEMBER HEARING YOU AND CROWLEY WERE AN ITEM”

-who is furfur?

-ooh after the church?

-how did those bastards not die?

-awww aziraphale is so in love

-oh no aziraphale is going as magician?

-ZOMBIE NAZIS

-“expert lip reader”…oh this will be good

-Crowley’s doing voices 😂

-“someone you can really trust”

-oof miracle blocking 😭 this is gonna be painful

-“my miracles aren’t working” “neither are mine” god they’re so stupid

-of course he’s never fired a gun before dhdhdhebbd

-how is this magic trick legal?

-ejhdhd démons really can’t read

-“I knew you’d come through for me, you always do”

Episode 5

-doctor who

-DUDE GAVE AWAY A BOOK

-Eric dude stop asking questions, you’re gonna get lightning bolted

-Nina definitely thinks they’re an item

-I WAS RIGHT

-Crowley’s a stuttering mess 😂

-the fact Nina just assumes Crowley could never be straight

-okay I think Nina broke Crowley

-did Crowley set up a fucking date?

-oh aziraphale you’re definitely “smitten”

-oh dude, Crowley maybe don’t spill about the swap?

-told “MY OWN FRIEND”

-“and I did not care for it” oh baby I’m sure you didn’t

-CROWLEY FINALLY ACCEPTED HES A DAD

-the way Gabriel is dressed up 😂

-everyone is so posh

-oh no Maggie

-aziraphale censored the bloody place

-dude let her say something other “seamstress”

-LET CROWLEY AND AZIRPAHALE DANCE TOGETHER

-lmao they’re flirting with Gabriel

-THEYRE GONNA FANCE

-well they danced for like five seconds

-CROWLEY IS A NERD, Aziraphale is gonna fucking marry this guy on the spot

-nevermind he’s just quick in his feet

-“I won’t leave you on your own”

-oh that’s the magician’s partner, I was wondering who they were

-“you’re a good lad” “I’m not actually either”

-“rescuing me makes him so happy”

-I do not think azirpahale is gonna like Crowley just running to heaven

-okay how are they gonna finish this in 50 minutes?

Episode 6

-ANGEL COSPLAYER CROWLEY

-so Nina and Maggie just keep developing their relationship while locked in places

-warrior aziraphale?

-dang hes really just using what killed him last season as a weapon?

-“nah”?

-“Crowley’s emotional support angel”

-“Jim go to your room” “goodnight”: THIS IS LITERALLY PARENTS TO THEIR KIDS

-oh wait what about his books?

-THE BOOKS

-angel form aziraphale?

-ooh halo

-DONT TOUCH IT ERIC

-Crowley is the only one here with any braincells

-if they do a miracle together it works too well? 😂

-beezlebub actually talking to flies

-“you’re perfect” they say, to a fly holding Gabriel’s memories

-THEY WERE SEEING EACH OTHER

-are they gonna dance?

-their hands lingered

-“no one’s ever given me anything before”

-THEY GOT TOGETHER: “I just found something that matters more to me than choosing sides”

-Crowley is just watching his husband get to work

-“alpha centauri’s nice”, aziraphale looks at him

-aziraphale is just looking lovingly at Crowley during this entire scene and I’m losing it

-“we need a little us time” “just us. Not you”

-aww he’s putting the place back together

-Nina called Maggie angel

-them recognizing that they can do things at their own pace and not be forced together

-they’re giving him relationship advice

-he put his glasses on :(

-“we could have been us”

-CROWLEY CJRHDHRHDH

-THEYRE KISSING?!

-oh Crowley no :(

-“anything you need to take with you?”

-WHY WOUKD YOU END IT LIKE THAT?

-WHAT THE FUCKKKKKK

-okay I seriously can’t believe at the end of this somehow Aziraphale in the Archangel and Gabriel is the one who ran off to Alpha Centauri with a demon

[alaffy]

The Golden Age, Ep.2x04 – The Duke (Spoilers)

Oh dear, I think this show is going off the rails a bit.  In my last post, I mentioned that it felt like they’ve spent three episodes setting up the season.  Halfway through this episode, I started to question if I had skipped an episode with the way some of these storylines are going.

Let’s just quickly get through the storylines we don’t care about.  The Vallet has decided he won’t leave unless he hear that it is his daughter that wants him too; no one cares.   The Russell’s cook has asked out the Lady’s Maid; no one cares.  And something about fixing a clock….

I’m not going to touch much on Marion’s storyline, except for one thing.  The way the daughter was pushing that the three of them look like a family.  Why do I have a feeling that, in order to have Agens’ nephew bow out at some point, we’re going to find out that he only asked to marry Marion because his daughter had become so attached to her?  Not that he isn’t fond of Marion, but they keep going back to how he’s trying to make things better for his daughter.

We have a single scene to remind us Russel is having problems with his workers wanting, you know, fair wages.

Oscar seems to be getting along with his (money) interest.  However, I can actually see them making some sort of marriage/business agreement that suits them both.

Peggy has arrived in the South and most of her scenes were fairly short bar the dinner scene.  And even then, the scene was more about Booker T. Washington and T.  Thomas Fortune; which is not too much of a surprise as Fortune was an advisor to Washington.  And with this conversation the writers are trying to show the differences between the two men's ideology, specifically how do you improve the quality of life for black men and women in a country where they are considered less than?  Fortune believes that Washington should teach the students to fight (I think he’s talking socially/politically but it wouldn’t surprise me if he meant physically, if need be, too). And the other question is…we see that Washington seems to have a cordial relationship with some white men and Fortune clearly has concerns about this.  You have a moment where Fortune is basically asking how Washington can have business relationships with people who enslaved them, to which Washington replies he doesn’t have relationships with those people.  I’m not explaining this very well, but basically it's a question on how much should they rely on/trust the white populace.  And it’s also very clear that, like I said last post, Peggy knows the history; but it’s like she understands but she doesn’t understand.

But now we move on to three stories that all just like skipped over portions.  For instance, apparently the writers decided to do Ada’s entire courtship in this episode.  Seriously, the Rector asked her to marry him and she agrees.  But will she go through it?

Larry and the Widow declare their love for one another.  But word gets out that they maybe having a triste.  Bertha invites the Widow to her house, calls the widow old, tells her she’ll never be able to give Larry children, and tells her that Larry will just be waiting for her to die just like the Widow did with her husband.  Damn.  The Widow breaks up with Larry who, I kid you not, talks about how they were going to get married.  I…fucking what?  Like was this something he just assumed was going to happen?  Then again, she doesn’t seem surprised by what he said, so does that mean they had plans?  If so, why did no one tell us?

And then there’s the Winterton situation.  I, uh, ok…well, backing up a bit.  We have a minor thing where it looks like The Met may have financial issues, but in the end George has his men look at it and discovers an accounting issue.  At least that’s what he tells Bertha.  Either this was done to further get back into her good graces, or they’re going to say that he lied to her again.  Right now, I’m assuming it’s good graces.

But, getting back to Ms. Winterton.  Mr. Winterton is summoned by Ms. Astor.  Turns out she’s learned about Ms. Winterton being Ms. Turner (although how I have no idea how she knows as that’s not explained to us).  Mr. Winterton confronts his wife, who lies and says she was a companion to Mrs. Russell.  She believes Bertha told Mrs. Astor in order to get back at her.  But we all know she didn’t, so why not explain how Ms. Astor found out?  Anyway, they’ve lost their box at the Music Hall.  Mr. Winterton threatens to take some of the old family with him and Ms. Astor seems fine with this (again, weird play, but sure). 

Meanwhile, George has gotten invitations for Bertha and himself to dine with the Duke of Buckingham.  They go to the dinner, where Bertha manages to switch her place card and Ms. Winterton’s so that Bertha can sit next to the Duke.  Winterton ends up sitting next to Oscar, who is quite intrigued to find out how Turner ended up as Winterton.  Bertha manages to convince the Duke to stay in Newport with the Russells instead of Wintertons. 

At the end of the episode, George is back in Bertha’s good graces.  Everyone finds out that the Duke will be staying with the Russells.  And…oh my God, the Wintertons.  “We can get another Duke.”  “I don’t want another Duke, I want that Duke,” she screams, as she stomps up the stairs like a petulant child.  I’m sorry, that was just stupid. 

So, next weeks recap will probably be a couple of days late as I won't be able to watch the new episode for a few days.  But it looks like we’re going to see Betha introducing Georga to the Duke. 

[papirouge]

Idk if this is super controversial but very much in my family, but I believe as Christians we should be the BIGGEST advocates for every socialist program that will help everyone, absolutely everyone. I’ve seen weird tales from Catholics where they believe they shouldn’t even try to help the poor because poverty would always exist (under capitalism, of course) and I think that’s actually evil to believe.

I’m also a big believer in sex separated areas. Not because I think women are too ~tempting~ or “distracting” to men, but simply because I don’t trust church bros. Normal guys who attend church aren’t church bros. Church bros are those lukewarm “spiritual” guys who go to church because they believe they are entitled to a submissive self hating trad wife who will stay at home, be feminine, and worship them as kings while also going 50/50 on everything. Then if they’re failing to attract girls at church, church bros will loudly complain to any guy nearby how awful western women are, how they are all used up whores who are gold diggers and too high maintenance with too high standards. And then some of the worst ones are asked to leave if they continue making a scene. OR if your church sucks, they will stay to build a group of likeminded church bros (and some self hating Pick Mes who actually never gets picked despite trying to agree with everything negative the bros say about women) to harass any woman at the church until one of them gets the police called on them and the church leadership then has to either defend them if they’re as misogynistic as the church bros or hide them by kicking them out to save their public reputation 🙂

Tbh beside the USA where they have this flop mentality of assuming that anything state controlled is coMmUnIsM and that wellfare implies stealing, your opinion is absolutely not controversial. Socialism has definite perks and only capitalism simps or crusty libertarian flops refuse to acknowledge this reality.

My country has a very socialist welfare & pension system and we have some of the lowest elderly poverty rate in Europe. Our healthcare system used to be one of the best in the word (it's currently attacked to make it more 'liberal' so its quality is getting down the toilet unfortunately...). Unlike the USA there's no 65 y.o working to survive here - they have a pension simply because we consider you shouldn't have to work so old.

I'll never forget during c0vid lockdown when anti government bro were like "see that's what government having too much power does!!!" and like yeah it sucked, but why is that they NEVER have the same energy when it comes to LACK of government that makes people resort to work until they die?? Did they even care ONCE about the amount of people who died out of lack of state assistance (which is probably much higher than c0vid lockdowns) since this shit has been going on for decades while the c0vid crisis lasted 1-2 years....? The vaçcine poisoning people with non tested formula wasn't solely the fault of government enabling this, but ALSO big pharma greedy CAPITALISM. Why don't they attack capitalism too?? ....they are such frickin hypocrites lol

I once made a post talking about Christian communes depicted in the Bible and it was only American burgers losing their shit at me and how mUh GivIng shIt tO pEolPle iS stEalINg MonEy as if they weren't themselves some broke randos living in their parents basement 🙄 like it's crazy how broke people will feel compelled to wk for the very system that keeps them down.... Stockholm syndrome shit.

But to come back to socialism, I think that's why many people (esp American) have a very flawed understanding of what it is. I literally lose braincell when I see them use interchangeably leftism - socialism - communism - (cultural) liberalism - globalism. Right wing socialism is a thing (bourgeois socialism). There are leftism movement rejecting liberalism (for example radfem are left aligned yet reject (cultural) liberalism). Communism is the antithesis of both liberalism and globalism....

Burgers think they are soooooo smart when they say "Nazism was socialism #checkmate" But these idiots always forget that 'Nazism' is the contraction of 'Nationalsozialismus'. Nazism is the demented offspring of Nationalism AND Socialism. Nazism was equally Socialism AND Nationalism so much that its name mix the 2 of them, so solely point out the socialism of Nazism to act like it was a socialist regime is dishonest and stupid. Interestingly, you never see them criticize nationalist countries and argue that Nationalism is the cornerstone of totalitarism and shit like that 🤔

Maybe that's bc I'm from a European country and that European is the breeding ground of all those ideologies but I got educated early on about these concepts and their peculiarity in school... so it bafflese to see grown ass Americans so uneducated about it. Which isn't their fault ofc, but then they should shut up instead of mindlessly rehashing those idiocies. Americans are the most politically illiterate people EVER which is why I'll never acknowledge whatever they have to say about politics beyond their own country. Damn even when they talk about France they always have to bring shit that happened almost a century ago be like tHey AlwAyS suRrEnDeR🤪 as if their own fat burgers asses weren't currently (economically AND politically) put to shame by Russia and China💀 like- don't throw stones when you live in a house made of glass 🤷🏾‍♀️

I'm surprised of your experience with greedy Catholics bc from my experience they've always been more based than protestant. Here in France Catholics are known to be pretty charitable and care for the homeless and poor family. Even when I was a child and my family piss poor it was an old catholic lady who regularly came to our apartment to give us food. I will never forget that. That's why despite the criticism I have for Catholicism as a faith, I'll always have a lot of respect for Catholics as individual.

I also think Catholic women are more based when it comes to modest clothing, veiling, etc. Protestant women tend to freak out when we say that, hm no, wearing makeup isn't compatible with the Bible, that there's not a single time where make up is talked about positively in the Bible, that makeup or heels aren't traditional and that such vanity was trAditionAlLy the prerogative of PROSTITUTES🙄

Oh and I don't go to church, but hearing all the horror stories of those who do like yours, I know that I'm doing the right thing xD

[elysiadjarin]

OP, I sincerely apologize for the quality of this, I was just seized by the muse for a hot second reading your post and had to slam this out in like 15 mins. Thank you for the brainrot, I hope this is okay as a lil tribute! <3

~~~

It’s more of a joke, really.

John Price is a good Captain, a great leader, a terrible follower, and a practically perfect husband in so many ways. You’d know— you’re his pretty little wife young enough to make people assume you’re a sugar baby before they see the gorgeous ring on your finger. You absolutely adore your husband to pieces, and therefore, it is an absolutely irresistible joke every time you engage in this behavior.

“Mom, you won’t believe what he’s done this time!” you call over-dramatically into the house as you walk in the front door. Your in-laws are lovely, lovely people, and you swear you’d die for your Mother-in-law no, not just for her lemon bars. You collapse into her arms, wrapping your arms around her. “Take him back, I can’t bear this torture any more,” you whimper.

She laughs, hugging you. “Terribly sorry dearie, you know he’s all yours and the no take-backs rule,” she says with mock-sympathy. “But tell me what he’s done this time, dear. How dare he not treat the best thing to ever happen to him better.”

It’s a joke, it really is. You both know it; it’s been this way ever since you started dating John. Ever since the first time your dramatic sense of humor made his mother laugh hard enough to nearly choke on her tea.

You pout up at her, eyelashes fanning over your skin and your cheeks puffing out. “He won’t buy me a new evening gown even though he ruined my last one by putting it in the washer with the wrong colors,” you whine.

“After he ruined it?” she gasps, shaking her head as she leads you to the couch. “Absolute barbarity, darling, how dare he not properly dress you up.” She nods sagely, handing you a fresh cup of tea. “After managing to find a gorgeous wife like you to settle down with and everything.”

You take the cup with a murmur of thanks, using it to hide your traitorous smile. “I will cry about it, Mom, you should see the horrendous color it turned my old dress. Never mind that I didn’t care too much for the original color,” you add irreverently. “You must scold him Mumsie dearest— I don’t know how I’ll ever go on.” You languish back against the couch cushions, earning another laugh from her.

“I’m sure he’ll be calling any moment to ask where you are, dear. I’ll give him a right proper scolding when he comes over,” she promises, leaning over to pat your knee.

“Perfect,” you say, popping back up with a smile. “But honestly— I came to beg for your coffee chiffon cake recipe. I haven’t been able to stop craving it and the bakery down the street just isn’t the same as yours.” You plead your case.

She laughs agreeably, leaning into the conversation while copying the recipe for you. Time with your mother-in-law is always pleasant: she’s always firmly liked you and insisted you were too good for John. You consider yourself lucky that you somehow escaped the dreaded in-law horror stories you hear about all the time from coworkers and friends. Toxic MIL whomst? Couldn’t be you.

By the time your dearest husband comes searching for you at his parents’ home, you’ve already made arrangements to catch dinner with the in-laws over the weekend and caught up on all the neighborhood gossip. He comes into the house to find you on the couch, dramatically weeping into your mother-in-law’s arms as she gently pets your hair and coos comfort to you.

“John Price!”

John winces as his Mother looks up from comforting you, a thunderous look in her eye. “Good evening, Mum—“

“Don’t Mum me, how dare you not take good enough care of your wife, the precious birdie?” She stands, leaving you on the couch as she walks up to him. “I told you she’s far too good for you as it is, when will you finally listen to me and start cherishing her?” Reaching up, she smacks John across the back of the head as if he’s once again a child misbehaving.

John ducks his head, reaching up to rub at his neck with a wounded expression. “Mum— what crime exactly have I committed this time—“

You watch from the couch, taking another innocent sip of tea and not bothering to hide the smug look on your face, not a single crocodile tear in sight.

“Buy your lovely wife a new dress for the one you ruined in the wash, you fool.” She rolls her eyes at him. “Honestly, John. Do better.” But laughter lines her voice.

Your husband steps into the room, his eyes landing on you with a hint of contrite amusement buried in their depths. “Yes Mum, I’ll do better,” he promises, a small smile curling the edge of his lips as his gaze meets yours. “She deserves it, after all.”

A sliver of heat curls in your belly at the way John looks at you— that knowing little glint in his eyes that promises sweet revenge. Perhaps one day you’ll find a better excuse to get fucked silly than tattling on him to his Mother. But in the meantime…

It’s a harmless joke, really.

I need to marry old man!Price and have his mother fangirl over me because her boy finally settled down and so that I can run to her for every little inconvenience which earns John a smack on the back of his head for not doing good enough to take care of his birdie.

Do better John.

[puerifungorum]

silly vampire movie concept with my ocs <3

(to clarify. what i mean is that i am jettisoning all the tragic backstories (we do not have the time or budget for those. they can be vaguely implied.) and trashing all my worldbuilding and lore. this is based on vibes and tropes and does not and should not make sense. i'm not assigning characters roles based on translations of what they've actually got going on, i'm assigning characters roles based on what would be fun. we're using as lore what i vaguely assume old-timey vampire movies to have as their lore.)

anyway. setting! this should be vaguely 1800s or vaguely 1930s with perhaps 1950s 1960s 1970s sensibilities? or all at once. but no modern technology! this is the idea of a campy vampire movie as it exists in my head (have not watched many vampire movies) (have watched dracula 1931) (have looked at still photos of other vampire movies). the setting is vaguely eastern european. if parts of it are not in eastern europe they can be in england. various characters can be in flowy white dresses.

you should imagine this in black and white.

Alianora is a vampire hunter! (not an angel in this.) She's very noble and sincere and brave and all that. At like, the very start of the movie or something, her dear friend Anselm dies due to a vampire’s predations! She’s mourning him from then on, but, like, not visibly in a hysterical grief way, in a solemn stoic way. 

If it’s Scarlet who kills him, Alianora can kill Scarlet right after and that’s my explanation as to what Scarlet’s doing in this. get staked idiot.

it might not make sense for scarlet to be the one to kill him based on the idea of like. vampires dying if you kill their sire. whatever i don't care moving on

So Alianora goes on. Vampire-hunting and whatnot. There’s a new vampire she’s hunting, who will turn out to live in a spooky castle! I’m going to say it’s Vianna for now. Helpful local maiden Judith is helpful and framed narratively as the love interest. There’s subtext that Alianora is interested in her as a way of displacing her grief over Anselm dying - trying to replace him with another emotional attachment/bond, attracted to qualities Judith shares with Anselm (personality-wise. They don’t look much alike).

initially it should not be clear whether Vianna is a vampire or just like. a weirdo

Shock and horror! Anselm has joined the legions of the undead! Will Alianora find the fortitude to free him of his curse and save his soul by killing him? Or will she succumb to the awful lure of the vampire herself?

Anselm btw is filled with resentment toward her for letting him die. because what is Anselm if not animated by wrath. He wants to turn her into a vampire as well (she has to stay with him as recompense for his own death) and if she refuses or hesitates he will go into a rage and try to kill her. (he's also mad at her for the romance with judith. he's barely even cold in his grave!! how little is he worth that he can be replaced so quickly! die!!!!!!)

At some point - either when she first finds out he’s become a vampire or right before she slays him - she does catch him waking up from his coffin.

it should not be clear if there's anything romantic going on between them before he dies. after he dies they're definitely acting romantically, but they should only refer to each other pre-death as "dear friend" and similar things - the romantic bit should be ambiguous whether it's based on an actual relationship or typical vampire seduction tactics. they should never kiss during the whole movie. they do get to almost kiss. it has to be weirdly charged when she's trying to kill him

(symbolically like her desire for him can be that he's the manifestation of her guilt and grief and unfulfilled love, but he's only a warped version devoid of the actual person she's missing - etc etc you know the drill. vampires are fun)

Judith meanwhile has her own gay little plotline going on with Vianna. 

It’s a love triangle! Will she choose the dashing vampire hunter who increasingly seems to only be using her as a replacement for a lost love, or the eerie and charismatic vampire who offers her immortality and a share in the Evil Plan (world domination à la Dracula)???

she's initially interested in Alianora because she's tragic and haunted. after some point Judith does realize that maybe "being sad about someone else" isn't really what she wants in a romantic partner. hm. (this bit should be subtextual)

Judith and Vianna also don't ever kiss. sorry Judith. they do get in some lust-filled gazes and they do get to lingeringly touch hands and Judith does get to be sexily menaced.

how are Anselm and Vianna connected? haven't figured that out. anyway

At the end of the movie Alianora kills Anselm and either she kills Vianna with Judith’s help or Judith kills Vianna. And then they have an obligatory romantic moment. (they are allowed to kiss.) This is what tvtropes.org calls an esoteric happy ending i think

i guess the ending could be like "oh nora's vanquished her personal demons of guilt and grief and righted her failing by saving her new love interest... judith's rejecting the lure of selfishness at the cost of other people...." but it should be done in a way where it doesn't FEEL like that's the takeaway. oh ok the leads are now in an unhappy romantic relationship where they're both pining for other people and had to kill the person they actually wanted. what was the point of this, you should come away asking.

more pictures :)

[rphelperblog]

Ignite Me Quote Rp Meme

“Ignite, my love. Ignite.”

“It's the kind of kiss that inspires stars to climb into the sky and light up the world.” 

"No. She's like a million years older than me." 

“All of you. Your entire body.Proportionally. Symmetrically. You’re absurdly, mathematically perfect. It doesn’t even make sense that a person could look like you,” 

"Would anyone else like to take over this conversation?"

“And we are quotation marks, inverted and upside down, clinging to one another at the end of this life sentence. Trapped by lives we did not choose.” 

“Come back to life, love. I'll be here when you wake up.”

“Hey, um, I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm looking for a friend of mine, Have you seen her? She's a tiny little thing, cries a lot, spends too much time with her feelings-"

"You should get a dog, love. I hear they share much the same qualities.” 

“It's not charity, he cares about me--and I care about him!"

“Are you out of your goddamn mind? You think we can take on two hundred soldiers? I know I am an extremely attractive man, but I am not Bruce Lee.”

"I can't stomach your pain,I can feel it so strongly and it's making me crazy- please, Don't be sad. Or hurt. Or guilty. You've done nothing wrong." 

“Lift your hips for me, love.”

"I love you exactly as you are.” 

"That's some weird shit. What do I feel like? Peanut butter?"

“I am no longer afraid of fear, and I will not let it rule me. Fear will learn to fear me.” 

“If anything, everyone needs to protect themselves from you. You’re like a freaking beast,I mean, you know—like, a cute beast. A little beast that tears shit up and breaks the earth and sucks the life out of people.” 

“I feel like I’ve been split open and stuffed with sunshine.” 

"I love making you mad.” 

“Do you never get exhausted being so wholly unbearable? You have as much charisma as the rotting innards of unidentified roadkill.” 

"I want you so much it scares me.” 

“In a world where there is so much to grieve and so little good to take? I grieve nothing. I take everything.” 

“People can think whatever they like....I don't desire their validation.”

“I do like his face.”

“The world is a mess and I want to laugh because all I can think is how horrible and beautiful it is.” 

“Oh my God. We can’t even be friends anymore.”

“You don’t like to kill people, remember? You’re against that, remember? You like to talk about feelings and rainbows—” 

"Don't ask me questions you already know the answers to. Twice I've laid myself bare to you and all it's gotten me was a bullet wound and a broken heart. Don't torture me,"

“And if you insist on continuing to make assumptions about my character, I’ll advise you only this: assume you will always be wrong.” 

I want you to make a list of all your favorite things, and I want to be on it.”

“Water that never moves.Its fine for a little while. You can drink from it and it'll sustain you. But if it sits too long it goes bad. It grows stale. It becomes toxic.I need waves. I need waterfalls. I want rushing currents.” 

“You know what just stop. Just—I can’t even talk to you right now.” 

“Why do you call her 'love'?"

“Words, I think, are such unpredictable creatures.”

You just like him for his personality, huh?"

"This is so depressing."

“You deserve so much more than charity," 

“I am enough, and I always will be.” 

“I've finally gotten to a point in my life where I'm not afraid to speak. Where my shadow no longer haunts me. And I don't want to lose that freedom--not again. I can't go backward. I'd rather be shot dead screaming for justice than die alone in a prison of my own making.” 

"You deserve to live, You deserve to be alive.” 

“This is not a funny moment. It’s not. I’m not laughing” 

“You allow the world to think you're a heartless murderer, and you’re not.”

"And I don't think that you're a psychopath. I also don't think you're a sick, twisted monster. I don't think that you're a heartless murderer, and I don't think you deserve to die, and I don't think you're pathetic. Or stupid. Or a coward. I don't think you're any of the things people have said about you.” 

"I don't even know why we're friends.” 

"I like it when you call me sweetheart."

"It's like a soap opera... But with worse acting." 

“I have never known this kind of peace. Never known this kind of comfort. And sometimes I am afraid that my love will terrify you.” 

“I’m not an idiot. I have reasons for the things I say.”

“no I'm afraid I'm just the regular kind of murderer.” 

You're a coward,You want to be with me and it terrifies you. And you're ashamed,Ashamed you could ever want someone like me. Aren't you?” 

“Ohhhhhh, so you’re threatening me now? Little crybaby knows how to make threats now?

"No one who cares about what happens to me. I'm not in the business of making friends, love. My job is to lead an army, and it's the only thing I'm good at. No one,"

“Hell is empty and all the devils are here.”

“If you hide your heart, he will never be able to take it from you.” 

"would you rather I use the proper anatomical terminology? Because you lady bits do not scare me-"

"Yeah, it sounds like we're going to go all peacock and hope they find us attractive enough to mate with.

“You have just started a war.” 

“I would rather be dead, than go back to being silent and suffocated.” 

. "I mean, I've got an excellent view of your ass from here, but if you don't mind me staring -"

“I have never claimed to live by any set of principles," 

"There's nothing wrong with you that isn't already wrong with me,"

“I never even tried. Because I let the world teach me to hate myself. I was a coward who needed someone else to tell me I was worth something before I took any steps to save myself.” 

"Because they're dead, love. They're all dead.” 

“I'm here for you kid. That's what friends are for.”

“I understand perfectly. He's fallen for your quiet, timid shell. For who you used to be. He has no idea what you're capable of. What you might do if you're pushed too far.” 

"I've never claimed to be right, or good, or even justified in my actions. I have been forced to do terrible things in my life, love, and I am seeking neither your forgiveness nor your approval. Because I do not have the luxury of philosophizing over scruples when I'm forced to act on basic instinct every day.” 

“I will be unapologetic. I will live with no regrets. I will reach into the earth and rip out the injustice and I will crush it in my bare hands.” 

No gun, no sword, no army or king will ever be more powerful than a sentence. Swords may cut and kill, but words will stab and stay, burying themselves in our bones to become corpses we carry into the future, all the time digging and failing to rip their skeletons from our flesh.”

“I’m not sure. But there’s something about the darkness, the stillness of this hour, I think, that creates a language of its own. There’s a strange kind of freedom in the dark; a terrifying vulnerability we allow ourselves at exactly the wrong moment, tricked by the darkness into thinking it will keep our secrets. We forget that the blackness is not a blanket; we forget that the sun will soon rise. But in the moment, at least, we feel brave enough to say things we’d never say in the light.” 

“Words are like seeds, I think, planted into our hearts at a tender age. They take root in us as we grow, settling deep into our souls. The good words plant well. They flourish and find homes in our hearts. They build trunks around our spines, steadying us when we’re feeling most flimsy; planting our feet firmly when we’re feeling most unsure. But the bad words grow poorly. Our trunks infest and spoil until we are hollow and housing the interests of others and not our own. We are forced to eat the fruit those words have borne, held hostage by the branches growing arms around our necks, suffocating us to death, one word at a time.” 

[moemammon]

hey !! I've recently discovered your writing and fallen in love !! everything you do is so amazing !!! I love it all!! could you write about how the boys would react to MC getting a little cold/stomach bug and needing to be taken care of ?? if this hits too close to home I'm sorry !! you def don't have to write it but I've always been a sucker for sicfic fluff !!

MC is Sick?! (Feat. The Demon Bros!)

(Tw for illness)

Lucifer

It was universally known that humans were fragile, and prone to illness. Some even died from simple colds. That being said, your little cold was still enough to bother the oldest brother. So much so that his work has been... of a lower quality than usual.

This dude is all disheveled and haggard because he's so worried over you, but that doesn't mean he's skimping on your care.

It's a surprise to everyone that he keeps you in his room, where he can monitor you and make sure you have everything you need. Might even cheat a little with magic from time to time, as long as it speeds up your recovery.

He's also making sure you're comfortable and at ease, often putting on a soothing record to lull you to sleep. In reality, he might also be using it to de-stress, too-

"To think you ended up like this while in my care... I should have paid closer attention to you. But now, you're my entire focus. Leave your recovery to me."

Mammon

You've been sneezing, coughing, and vomiting all over the place! This is some kinda human illness, right?? aRE YOU OKAY-

Proceeds to go OVERBOARD with the care. You're wrapped in twenty blankets, you've got an ice pack on your head and a thermometer in your mouth (the kind used in cooking because they don't own a normal thermometer), and he's gathered every medicine he could get his hands on

But once he calms down, he's actually pretty good at caring for you. Mammon isn't COMPLETELY useless when it comes to caregiving, so that's a plus. He's just especially worried because it's you.

Refuses to leave your side, and won't let you leave your room. If you need anything, he's just going to get it for you! He's also barring his brothers form entering, claiming that he's trying to keep them from getting sick.

"Who told ya to go out and get sick, huh?! Makin' me all worried and stuff... Guess I've got no choice but to take care of ya! I'm not leavin' your side, ya hear??"

Levi

Levi's literally been dreaming of a scenario where he’d be able to nurse you back to health. Uh, not that he wanted you to get sick, though!

He's always wanted to do the 'pressing your foreheads together to check your temp' thing.... And 100% own a nurse cosplay that he's tempted to wear

But it's a little hard for him to focus on his fantasies when you look so pitiful. He's got to make sure you're back to full health ASAP! There's a marathon you two need to binge, and he doesn't want you throwing up every five seconds!

He'll take you to his room, since he'll be able to take care of you 24/7. And tbh?? He actually does a decent job?? He's a little annoying about it because he keeps checking on you every three seconds and talking to you when you're trying to sleep, but he means well.

"If only the 'Kira Kira Curing Beam' was a real thing.... For now, I'll just do my best with what I've got! Ganbare, MC!! Faito! Faitoooo!!!!"

Satan

The first one to notice that you're getting sick, so he's on it 👌

Obviously he's read enough to know the basics of taking care of a sick human, and he can study anything else he doesn't know, so you're in good hands.

Also EXTREMELY worried. It's written all over his face, despite his attempts to keep it cool. He's read how humans can succumb to things like this....Actually, he just finished a novel where that was essentially the main plot-!

So gentle with you throughout the entire process. He makes sure to keep you warm, brings you all the essentials, makes sure you're hydrated, and keeps tabs on your medicine. He's got a schedule for your care and everything!

"Honestly, you should have told me sooner that you weren't feeling well. It's fine to come to me for things like that, you know? I'll always be happy to take care of you."

Asmo

Snot, phlegm, AND vomit??? Yeah,,,, that's a hard pass,,,,

It's taking every ounce of his mental strength not to abandon you in your time of need, but thankfully his love for you is greater than the disgust for now

But his dramatic ass is gonna come into your room in full hazmat when he takes care of you, no exceptions. Even if you ask him to bring you a glass of water, he's acting like you have the plague.

But he's also pretty good at taking care of you? Even demons get sick, and Asmo has a tendency to get pretty intimate with wide varieties of demons, so he's had his fair share of sick days.

"How am I supposed to hug and kiss you if you're so sick?? It's killing me, MC! Though, they say you can sweat an illness out of your body if you try hard enough. I think I know plenty of ways to work up a sweat~"

Beel

Now is no time to think about how hungry he is becaUSE HES WORRIED ABOUT YOU

Beel isn't the type to really know much about humans, other than stuff about their food and how weak they are, so he's pretty much assuming you're going to die.

Literally won't leave your side. If you need anything, he brings it. If you need to go somewhere, he's carrying you.

He doesn't know how to care for you, so he asks his brothers for all the help he can get. Though he insists on personally bringing you the remedies they give him.

"Hang in there, MC. You should eat more to build up your strength. I know you can't keep anything down, so I asked Satan to make something good. Here, it's soup. I'll blow it off for you, so open wide."

Belphie

Honestly, he thought you were just taking a REALLY long nap. You hadn't left your room at all, and you didn't even go to RAD. He was lowkey jealous that Lucifer didn't scold you until he realized it was because you were sick.

And very sick from the looks of it. There were tissues everywhere, your room was hot, and you looked like you'd been dropped in a lake, fished back out, then beaten up and thrown back in.

He couldn't even tease you when you were in such a pitiful state. Belphie had seen illness plenty of times, so this wasn't anything new. It didn't ease his worries, though.

So he keeps you company by curling up in bed with you, not caring if he's close enough that he might get sick. He's not the best at actually caring for you, because he tends to forget to bring you things or falls asleep on the way, so he leaves that to his brothers.

"You must be lonely, being holed up in your room all alone. It can't be helped, so I'll stay with you until you're feeling better. Just don't get your snot on me, okay? ....heheh, I'm just joking. Come here."