#i’ll probably eat my feelings

[a-bucket-in-the-void]

y’all are all worried about the election, i got a test tomorrow i can’t worry about that

[mildmayfoxe]

ok i got myself set up at work. whining ⬇️

i decided to just do the couch in the office bc the air mattress seemed dramatic even though it would’ve probably been more comfortable. i grabbed some sheets to cover it bc i know my boss’s dogs have been all over it 💀 i took some food from home & enough clothes for like 3-4 days but if my roommate does have covid i’ll probably have to go back for more stuff. AND i’ll probably have to find another place to stay bc on wednesday my other manager coworker will come in. and she’ll probably be sympathetic and probably won’t care that much but it’s kind of pathetic so im feeling very #ashamed about the whole thing. we’re closed thursday so at least i wont be in the way if im still there then but friday saturday we’re open as normal i just don’t usually work those days. i have open orders so i need to mail those on friday which means going home regardless at the very least to get that stuff to send away. i have so few friends locally let alone ones i feel comfortable asking to crash and even fewer that i could crash with that i trust to not have done a bunch of risky stuff recently (none.) (my one friend who i could stay with lives with her brother & they usually do parties on holidays. notably thursday is the fourth of july so i would feel nervous staying there over the weekend). but i need somewhere else to go. lol. esp because it’s not like there’s a SHOWER here. all this to say that basically i am feeling really fucking sad and tired of being so scared of everyone and not being able to trust a single person i know, especially the people i live with. it fucking sucks dog. i don’t want to feel like this. i don’t like being scared all the time. i want to sleep in my own bed in my own house and not catch a deadly disease by doing that. i came to get a sandwich from a local courtyard place but it’s packed bc it’s nice out & there’s trivia at the brewery on mondays and i forgot and i thought being somewhere with people would make me feel better but im just so jealous that all these people have homes to go back to tonight. i know im being dramatic bc it’s just a few days but being so on edge about covid is exhausting and it’s been years and it feels like it’s never going to end. nobody cares!! now i get to go back to my job where im going to sleep tonight to cry. but at least i can be here. it’s better than nothing

[sincerely-sofie]

Update on The Appointment (mentioned here previously) for anyone who was curious / concerned: It went good and I’m NOT going to have to drop out of college and scramble to find a way to get myself in working condition in spite of various health conditions and pay for my expensive medications out of pocket in less than two years!

I’ve been waiting for an answer to that for about two weeks straight and it’s been wearing on me horribly. I’ve been struggling to sleep and eat from what I now recognize was the stress of anticipating a “Yeah you need to get yourself a steady job ASAP that will fund the medicines you need to ensure your brain doesn’t spontaneously combust” as an answer.

I’m going to go disperse into atoms now brb—

[bookinit02]

thinking about this post i saw the other week where this person was saying how badly they wanted to be able to buy a nice mug without thinking twice about it. and all the comments were saying how they could just buy a cheaper mug. and they were like jesus fucking christ ITS NOT ABOUT THE MUG. because yeah

[ghostbeam]

I think I think I think after I finish these wips I’ve been working on I really wanna try to write horror

[spacespore]

HI TUMBLRR it’s me

[seventh-district]

so uh. that 2.2 Special Program, huh

[roylustang]

The rodents have been terrorizing me again for the last 4 nights. I regret to say I am no longer being nice about it.

[rainbow-unicornosaur]

._.

[katabay]

Do you have specific fiction authors that you like to read? What aspects of a story make you want to really dig your fingers in it? Is it horror?

I’ve got a couple! Keigo Higashino for sure. anything Naoki Urasawa does: I will be reading it. Priest (Guardian and Mo Du are all time favorites). also KJ Charles and Andrew A Smith!

ngl I don’t really have a concrete list of favorite fiction writers, I spent several days thinking about this one: like, I have favorite books for sure, but I don’t often find myself considering an author to be a favorite just because their book blew my mind. I’ve only read three of Andrew A Smith’s works, but he’s here because he gave an interview years that changed my entire approach to storytelling, and I still revisit it whenever I start editing a story.

honestly the big thing is that I like character!! I like compelling characters (extremely varied definition of compelling, it doesn’t have to be much, but it does have to have something) I like it when something goes full throttle into whatever it wants to be. I’ll watch a slow paced slice of life romance with the same amount of enthusiasm that I had for Devil Judge, and the 1vs10 beat down in Ipman takes up just as much space in my brain as the ‘let’s not see each other from now on,’ breakup in the Heirs (but for extremely different reasons lmao)

however. if I have to pick something more thematically specific: I like seeing people in power get what they have coming to them, I like explorations and confrontations of political and social injustices. kingdom is one of my favorite shows, and the horror is great, but it was the political-class-power aspect of it that solidified it as a memorable watch to me. kamen rider build did something fundamental to the circuitry of my brain. etc.

[lightspren]

like it’s one thing when i’m exhausted after a busy, difficult day

it’s an extra level of annoying when i’m mind numbingly exhausted after a mediocre, no disasters, only one unusual thing, steady work kind of day

i’m going to fistfight god

[breakbreadwithme]

i hate it here

[fingertipsmp3]

Why must dieting be absolutely fucking miserable

[confused-alot]

when do we start gatekeeping pnf from the creators they gotta be stopped before they fuck it up

[coolestfinch]

this shit is mean-spirited & rude. don’t put it on my dash.

[exopelagic]

okay I severely misjudged spaghetti guy he’s actually just really cool