#i wish my mom would be more understanding about my sexuality too

[sleep-0-deprived]

im not sure if you are taking any requests rn but I NEED to see some male reader Shigaraki heavy, hurt no comfort, gut wrenching angst just cause there is barely any Shigaraki x male reader and barely any angst in general

(you can ignore this request if you want!!)

Things that your dad doesn’t know (Tomura shigaraki x male reader angst one-shot)

WC:. 1.6K

Tags: hurt not comfort, angst, internalized homophobia, past religious trauma, generational homophobia, unspoken feelings, religious AFO au

A/N: I have never written angst before, I have no clue if it’s any good but I think this is the only time I’m willingly trying to hurt my pookies! ໒꒰ྀི˃ ˕ ˂ഃ ꒱ྀི১

Being a villain wasn’t your first choice in life, in fact had you been told that’s what you would end up becoming ten years ago…well you would’ve been in shambles? After all your dream was to be a hero, to help those who needed it most and give comfort/security to those around you.

maybe that was just you wanting to be the person you wished was given to you but that doesn’t matter because it wasn’t who you became anyway. At the ripe age of fifteen you were a runaway, your parents had sent you off to a private academy in Japan. In reality it was just a fancy term for a boarding school for ‘troubled boys’ but those words tasted bitter because that place was just filled with naive boys questioning their sexuality.

That place left you filled with thoughts of things you’ve never worried about before, one moment you’re just a boy who has some silly crush in the boy next to you in class and the next you’re a thirteen year old being told the way you felt was ‘sinful’. You’d never forget the way your mom just stared at you blankly while your dad shouted at you “those thoughts aren’t normal boy, how’d you turn out like this?” God you’d give it all to forget those words, every remembrance of them felt like a puddle pulling you to the ground leaving you to wallow in shame.

By the time you were fourteen you started to fall for the words the headmasters of the school preached to you, you thought “if I could just deny it then it’ll go away” or if you didn’t accept it then it wasn’t there. By fifteen you knew you had to get out of there, you didn’t care how you had to do it but you felt an unwavering hate for yourself every second you stood in line for the daily mass at that place.

When you did finally escape you ended up on the streets, moving city to city across Japan, too afraid to head for the states out of fear for your parents getting you back. Then you met him, All For One was what he called himself, he found you in a dingy alley all littered in bruised and scars from the treatment you had endured from that school.

He took you in and gave you a place to live for as long as you did what he asked of you. He made you use your quirk for his own wants but you’d never tell him your past or where you came from because it was evident with his god complex that he wasn’t understanding, after all how could a man from his generation be.

Life wasn’t all bad, that was what you’d tell yourself but then you met Tomura, you two never clicked in the beginning. All he’d do is stare at you from afar and judge you, but you just accepted it because he was your leaders heir. Eventually by the age of seventeen the two of you had became friends, the league of villains was a new concept with barely five members

You didn’t know what you felt or how to feel it but all you knew was the days felt more bearable to live when he was there. When you two didn’t have tasks to fill or agendas to make you were teenage boys, you watched cheesy shows on his bed or video games in his room, energy drinks and late nights was the routine between you two and their was an unspoken blonde that came of it.

Eighteen rolled around for you and Tomura was nineteen by then, it felt like an extension of eighteen for you, nobody but Tomura even knew of your real birthday and maybe it was for the lack of care or the fact you never spoke to anyone besides AFO, Shigaraki and occasionally Kurogiri.

By this point you’ve realized that things aren’t totally platonic between the two of you but Tomura having spent his whole life enduring AFO’s standards and beliefs that he’s pushed onto him, he denies anything and everything. Tomura never had the most stable life to begin with even before he met AFO, his dad was the definition of a bigot, he looked down on him for not being manly enough, for crying when he got hit by him.

Tomura and you were closer than friends could be, the way you two held each other and cuddled in his bed at night, or spent free time locked away in your room away from the other’s gazes. But you were never truly together in the way you wanted to be, it was like being skin close with a thin barrier between keeping you two from fully touching.

The two of you liked being away in private the most, even with all of the denial in your head was better than the hurtful gaze AFO would give to Tomura when he was caught sitting too close to you in the bar. Over time it felt like you began to know Tomura less and less, the boy you once clung to like he was the air in your lungs became a man that hardly spoke to you unless it was about the leagues plans.

You were no fool you knew AFO had confronted and filled Tomura’s head with thoughts of how what he was doing was nothing less than “un-right” and those deep rooted memories of the past that always crept in when you least wanted found you again, reminding you of every word nailed into your mind on how you should feel in no regards for what you did feel.

All you wanted to do was run back to his room, to hug him and cling and not worry about everyone else but that wasn’t going to happen. You watch him become the second AFO knowing you can’t and do anything. Your once close relationship has a wedge in between, it was non existent and nothing you could say would make him accept you.

“What happened to our friendship Tomura?” You’d show up at his door late at night while the others were asleep, his blue hair gone and what looked back at you didn’t feel the same quiet man that used to be. “Nothing has happened, things change and people grow [name], you’re acting as though we were lovers.” You knew that he was only forcing his words but it never stung any less.

“No but we could’ve been Tomura” you manage to spit out, your voice cracks and your whole body feels like lava. “No we never could’ve, you’re a man [name] and no amount of emotions changes that”

“If I can’t be your lover why can’t we just be friends again tenko?”

You’re nearly to tears at this point standing in the entrance of his bedroom feeling your heart being squeezed.

“Because. Being close to you makes life hard, I can’t sit and pretend to be your friend when I know I won’t be the one that ends with you, and don’t call me that anymore, you’re just my subordinate…nothing else and you won’t ever be [name].”

There was the answer you knew would come, he pointed for his door clearly wanting you gone, and you quickly obliged in wanting of him seeing you break down. You hadn’t hurt this bad since you had first been sent off by your family, how were you supposed to be ok with this? Why did life have to be this way? Were you destined to always get close to what you love then have it slip away?

You had more pathetic questions than you did answers and the night was long, you weren’t sleeping anytime soon and you knew it. You’d rather have been his friend if you couldn’t be his lover, at least if you were his friend you’d still be something to him, you’d still be in his life, you’d still be the person he sat around and played video games with.

You were just doomed to a life of watching the person you love become unrecognizable. You and him had planned to stick together, he had promised you’d always be together, he always told you that you were the only person that understood him and now it was all gone.

When war against the hero’s began you couldn’t do anything to stop him. Your pleas fell on deaf ears, AFO was on his shoulder telling him every little move to make and what to do and his plan didn’t have you in it. You were forced to sit on the side lines unable to jump in when his final fight started, seeing his beaten form and his scared body broke you.

You had made Tomura your world, he was your reason to listen to AFO, if he did something then no matter how much it hurt you, you’d do it too. When Tomura started his fight against Midoriya, you were practically running to the fight trying to make way to him and trying to use your quirk to just stop it all.

You were three seconds too late. The final blow had been felt and you were right next to Tomura sobbing like a scared kid watching him decay away. All Tomura does is look up at you, red eyes glossy and you know he isn’t making it. “You can’t leave me Tenko! You just can’t!…you promised me?”

You’re hysteric when the police start dragging you away from his ash’s, you’re feeling your word shatter so fast knowing all the things you had planned won’t happen.

[valentine-cafe]

˖⁺. “ r/am I the asshole !? ” : 

﹙ multi monsters x gn reader. ﹚.𖹭 ݁

. . . multi characters x gn reader ( fem on xiyang ) !! 🍓 : ﹙ pasquale: adrenaline addict ˖ racer ˖ inhuman character ˖ seong-jin: grim reaper ˖ detective character ˖ rishen: director ˖ spy ˖ assassin character ˖ xiyang: grim reaper ˖ mercenary leader character ﹚

your lover takes to reddit to ask if they've been an asshole in relation to you recently . . .

﹙ cws ﹚: sexual content on xiyang | wc : 1.8k 

﹙ receipts ﹚: just had to do more of this format 

꒰  other treats : guidelines ˖ m.list ˖ characters ˖ our lore  ꒱

﹙pasquale 781. ﹚. . . pretending I don't see the ghost !? 🍒 : "Let's start this off by saying I can see ghosts. Yeah. OoOoOoOoo. Always been able to. Anyway. So just my luck! I landed with a pookie who can do the same. Great right?

Yeah. If I wasn't shit scared of half the fuckers I see. Ghosts aren't little kids standing in nightgowns. FUCK NO. They're demons. Weird lil shits. And that's saying a lot, my brother's satan.

Not so bad you say?? Until pookie decides they wanna mention every time one's in the room! I don't mind them clinging. Course not. But the problem comes in when I pretend I can't see a damn thing. Lowkey gaslighting them that there's nothing there. Is that bad?

Well they got angry at me over it yesterday and for fucks sakes what am I supposed to do man? 'AH! A GHOST!' Do I look like fucking ghostbusters??? I'm italian. This ain't Luigi's Mansion! If I see it ( AND I REGRETABLY FUCKING DO ) - no i don't!

This came off a lot more frantic but how the hell do I tell pookie that their big, strong, kinetic user-punk-racer-boyfriend is afraid of ghosties?

Edit: to everyone calling me a pussy that's so funny cause your mom called me that too when I was ball's deep -"

 

﹙seong-jin 9948e. ﹚. . . being too honest !? 🍓 : "I'm a bit too honest with my partner. Before anyone writes about me being insensitive or being an asshole ( I know ). I would like to preface that my honesty is the reason we are even together. I flat out asked them if they wish to date. They agreed. Now we're two years into a relationship.

I've never hidden this part of me. If it comes to mind, it is out my mouth. That's how it's always been. If I don't like the way they're acting, I say it. If they ask me a question, I answer honestly. It's been this way for years. With everyone. Not only can I not stand bullshit, I simply do not have the energy to sugarcoat anything. They have been fine with this. While we do clash every now and then, I always make it known that I do not come from a place of malice. That is how we have made it work for two years.

How was I supposed to know answering, truthfully, that I did not like their outfit — was not appropriate?

I understand that there can be some sensitivity. I try to compensate for them like they do me. But they asked me a question, what was I supposed to do - lie?

Now I am at work. Feeling as though I really did it this time. I apologised before I left. Sent a text too. What the hell am I supposed to do? I even told them just because I don't like it does not mean they do not have to wear it.

How do I get around this?"

 

﹙rishen 1311. ﹚. . . not inviting them over !? 🍒 : "Get the gist of how this works. I'll be brief. I have been dating this person for about a year or so. 'One whole year' as they prefaced this morning in their frustrated slew.

I simply do not think it has been long enough. I feel as though we are moving too fast. Before anyone goes calling 'commitment issues' or 'what are you hiding?' : a gun. Under my pillow. Every night.

Yes, I denied them access when they showed up by surprise. I led them back to their home and spent the night with them. Yes, I didn't let them walk me home from the bar. Yes, I bled all over my floor from a stab wound and still told them to not show up while they panicked over the phone. Is it so wrong?

I assumed they would understand that it has nothing to do with them. I have my reasons. None of it involves them. But I suppose we simply can't have nice things. Fucking fantastic.

Is it to hard to understand that I'm just shit scared to wake up to someone every morning? Or have them in my kitchen cooking me food?

I'm fine. I don't need their help. I am fine. I just need to know that I'm not losing my mind over this. What do I do?"

 

﹙xiyang 9819. ﹚. . . not telling her I'm infertile !? 🍓 : "This feels a bit more bizarre than the other entries. But guess we're all dealt a different hand. My girlfriend and I have been in a happy relationship for five years now.

I love her to bits. Everything about her. Express that in whatever way I can. Just be honest with her, I'm sure you're typing. Yeah. Cept for one damn thing:

She's got a huge fucking breeding kink.

Don't laugh. I'm constantly fighting for my life. I'm off the hook for now. Told her I just can't commit to a baby with my job and hers. So she's on the contraceptives thinking they'll fucking matter. Bouncing on me like a pogo-stick telling me to breed her!

Hunny! If I could I would! I wouldn't hesitate to just give you every baby you want and more but unfortunately my lil swimmers are fucking defected.

Maybe I should mention that I indulge her. Can I be blamed? She gets so into it. I don't mind the fantasy one bit. I'm just a guy who loves his girl and wants to give her whatever her pretty little heart desires.

And if that means making her believe I can pop one in her whenever? So be it. We'll just get a puppy or something I don't fucking know. I'm typing this in panic."

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[vixen7243]

Part 2

Masterlist | Original Thought | Pt. 1

TF141 X AFAB!Reader (Soon)

Tag list: @the-faceless-bride @persephone-kore-law

*Persephone had given the brilliant idea of being closeted bisexual to add to the drama...And of course I'm going to run like a maniac with it because YEESSS, as one myself, I have so many things to put in with this. and hope they/you like how I'm taking the route so far. If anyone would like to be added to tag list let me know, and leave comments on thoughts of ideas or if there's just anything you like so far.🥰 Enjoy the reading.* CW!:SA,VIDEO OF SA, HARRASSMENT, MENTION OF SELF HARM *Oh My God, this is longer than I thought I would do, but by god. This is the set up and hopefully yall like it.*

From early on it was easy for Y/N to realize that she was into girls, secondary school when she was 11 being the biggest case in point when she had her first experience kissing a friend, ‘to see what’s it like’ of course. The giggling was endless, but when she wanted to keep going back for more and seeing that she wasn’t interested in wanting to see what it was like to kiss a boy, she talked to her mom and had a long talk and learned about lesbians, and that she was one from what she was gathering. Her mom was, to say at the very least, unsupportive, and angry, claiming having come from a family that is conservative she told Y/N never to kiss a girl again, never look at girls like that ever again. The fight that broke between them was horrible, and as much as she wanted to call her dad and tell him about what had happened, she was afraid that he would also be upset with her, and maybe disown her, telling her she was never welcome back home. She wished she hadn’t given her mom a chance this year to keep her, but the guilt of having chosen her father ate at her making her think it would do her and her mom some good to spend the year together. Now, she regrated it, regrated it even more when she came to her mom with questions of her feelings and thoughts.  

As time went by, she counted down the days till she could return home, she stayed on the phone most nights with her stepmom, trying to stay positive. Only, the worry started to set in when there was only 3 months left till it would be summer and she could return home. Her stepmom had informed them that she hadn’t heard from her husband, Y/N’s father, and that she was worried for him. With him gone, your mom would be able to keep you longer, due to the fact he was supposed to be picking you up and flying back to Barr.  

Then one day she had gotten a call from her stepmom, broken up with sobs, it was hard for Y/N to understand her, but she could just barely pick up that she had said something about her dad going MIA and visitors? She wasn’t sure, but she was panicked as she went to her mom crying, begging to go back and be with her grandparents and Sharon to wait to hear about her dad. She never understood what had happened between her parents to make them divorce and for her dad to move from America all the way back to Scottland, but whatever it was, she had no doubt her mother was to blame. When she refused, took Y/N’s phone and soon moved, she hated her. Hated her with a passion, tried endlessly to find her grandparents on any social media and Sharon too, but Sharon had kept her last name, and she had no clue what it was. She wished she had asked before, she cried most nights after they had first moved thinking the worst fate for her father, mourning his potential death. She never let her self-stay close to her mom, she shut her out and delved headfirst into her sexuality, dating a girl that she had learned, after they had moved, was gay. As much as her mom wanted to say something, she had to bite her tongue, only because she learned that her girlfriend was the daughter of her new boss.  

That’s certainly not to say that she didn’t making life at home a living hell for Y/N, chores, no phone, took all the money she somehow managed to make by doing yardwork for neighbors and even pet and baby-sitting. Y/N eventually broke up with her girlfriend, when she had realized she did like her at first, everything was now because she was dating her out of spite and loved her more as a friend than romantically. Even though she was angry, Katy understood and, at first, kept a little bit of a distance before becoming great friends. 

When she was 15 and her guy friend came over to work on a project, when she walked into her room after grabbing drinks and snacks, he was laid out on her bed, shirt ridding up showing off his abs. The flutter feeling in her stomach and blush had her freezing in her doorway as she stared at him. What in the hell is happening? Why am I feeling so... 

“Sweet, you brought soda.” When he sat up, you slowly walked in and handed him a can before going to your desk quickly sitting down and trying to hide your face. “So, you want to go through the article, and I’ll look for more websites to use as references?” 

“Sure.” Burying your nose into the papers you had printed earlier that day, you couldn’t stop looking at him, why did he seem so different? He’d been over plenty of times, times when you guys laid in bed watching movies or playing new games, had slept stacked on each other a few times even and you’d never felt anything before. So. Why now? What was different? Why were you feeling how you usually down when you would see an attractive girl that you were crushing on? “Oh god.” 

“What? Can’t find anything?” 

“Huh? Oh, no, nothing.” You chewed your lip, cursing to yourself when you felt him lean against your shoulder, he was reading the page, but you felt his breath against your neck, could ever so faintly hear him mumbling under his breath as he read, and it was making the hair on the back of your neck stand. When he finally went back to his spot on your bed you let out the breath you hadn’t known you were holding. Trying to refocus on the work at hand, you tuned him out and got a few pages of writing down before debriefing him on what you wrote and handing it to him so that way, he could add to it with whatever he had been able to find. 

While he was packing up his back you cleaned up the cans and wrappers before watching him, non to subtly. “What’s the matter? You’ve been staring at me on and off all evening?”  

You shook your head, although he was your friend, he wasn’t close enough that you would ever tell him that you were feeling things, things that you only feel for girls, since you were gay... or you thought all this time and had been. But now here he was out of the blue riling things up inside of you. “It’s nothing.” He was popular in your school, the same group of girls that had tormented you and bullied you since you had come out had the biggest crushes on him, and most importantly, Sam, the head bitch, had dated him for a while and hated that he hung out with you. If you told him, you started feeling... conflicting feeling towards him, things that you haven’t yet processed properly, he’d tell his friend, because he couldn’t keep anything to himself and then they would go around spreading things about you behind your back. 

“Yeah right, just tell me?” When you avoided looking at him, he sighed, “You heard then huh?” 

“What?” 

“That Sam and I are back together.” Looking at him surprised you scowled, “We talked out some issues, and figured why not try again.” 

“Didn’t she -” 

“We talked things out.” He cut you off standing up. 

“She sucked your cousins dick.” 

“Y/N” 

“He took a video and spread it all through the school.” 

“And we talked about that, it’s none of your business anyways.” He waited at beat before squinting at you slightly, “Do you have a thin fer me?” 

“WhAt?” You looked at him wide-eyed and mouth open, “Why would you ask me that? Ye know I-” 

“Sam said you have been looking at me differently lately and that we’ve been spending time together too-” 

“We’re working on a project together.” 

“I told her that... you're not denying that you’ve been looking at me differently.” 

Scowling you crossed your arms over your chest huffing, “Because that’s insane Jake. Ye know I’m lesbian, I’ve never been into guys. Ever.” When he opened his mouth to say something you quickly spoke up, “And even if in some other bizarre world, why would I start liking ye?” 

He glared at you at that, “What the hells that supposed to mean?” 

“Yer not special Jake, pretty fucking typical and boring, why would I have a thin fer ye?” You wanted to bite your tongue off, you’d never been to mean to anyone other than Sam and her little click, but you vouched that, that’s because they deserved it.  

“Fuck you Y/N.” He snatched up his back and walked out, you took a deep breath before collapsing onto your bed sighing. You weren’t sure who to talk to, but you wanted to talk to someone, so, pulling out your laptop you pulled up skype, you’d found a sweet guy that lived in Edinburgh, Scottland, when you were looking for your dad and had become good friends. Dominic, he was gay and your most trusted confidante when it came to anything you needed to talk to someone about. 

“Hey lass, what’s going on?” 

“I’m, surprised you answered, isn’t it like midnight for you?” 

“Yeah, but I can’t sleep, so again, what’s te matter?”  

You leaned back into your pillow and told him what had happened when you first walked back into your room and seeing Jack on your bed to what you had said making him leave. When he stayed quiet you wrapped your arms around your waist, “I’m confused on why I was feeling that way to him and then he wouldn’t shut up about Sam and what she had said about me.... There was so much going on in my head and he was overwhelming me with so much I just went off on him and said what I shouldn’t have.” Looking up at him you whispered, “What’s going on with me?” 

“Oh Christ lass,” he started laughing a bit before shaking his head, “Ye’ve gotta crush on him.” 

“What? But I-” 

“I know, but... from the sounds of it, ye like him. And There’s nothing wrong with that.” 

“So, I’m... I’m bi? How? I’ve never liked any guys before? How am I 15 and just now liking a boy... JAKE no less?!” 

His laughter made you sigh, “Late developer. It happens.” You doubted that you were still confused on your feelings but decided you’d just slowly sort yourself out.  

So, for the next few months you broke down your feelings and realized that yup, you were into both guys and girls, and Jake was ignoring you still.... until. There was going to be a party at Sam’s, and your best friend Kieran had pulled you along, you lied to your mom that you were going to her house, and she lied that she was going to yours. When the bother of you walked into her house, Kieran pulled you into the kitchen handing you a cup, when you took a sip you choked huffing, making her laugh, “You never drink before?” 

“No, my god, have you?” 

“Few times, with family, mom would always have a cow though.” She took a swig from her cup before urging you too try and take another drink. After 2 cups, you were slowly feeling the effects before you seen Jack walking to you, Kieran already got the rundown of what had happened and that you had concluded that you were in fact bi now. She just wasn’t sure if you would be so comfortable around him yet. “Want me to distract?” She whispered tucking into your side. 

“No, it’s okay.” You said taking a deep breath before smiling when he stopped in front of the both of you. 

“Hey.” 

He was staring right at you, you felt the blush cover your face, you swallowed thickly, hoping your voice doesn’t betray you and crack, “Hi.” 

“Hi.” Kieran chirped, her smile spreading when he glanced at her for a moment before looking you over. You weren’t the thinnest, you had a little extra meat around your middle and your thighs certainly had no gap, but your confidence helped you feel comfortable wearing the short shorts, tank top and torn flannel that when seen from behind damn near made you look like you weren’t wearing any short at all.  

“Wanted to talk to you in private.” 

Your eyes widened as you looked to Kieran before looking back at him, “Alone? With me? Why?” 

Rolling his eyes he grabbed your wrist turning and pulling him with you, when you felt the cup being pulled from your hand you looked back at Kieran who was giving you thumbs up making a smoochy face before laughing. You looked at the back of Jack’s head anxious, Where are we going? Upstairs? Why? You didn’t pay attention to the people that were watching the two of you disappear up the stairs, your sole focus was Jack and them way he laced his fingers with yours. Despite yourself on a few occasions, he had been an invading guest in some of your fantasies and dreams, that to now feel him pulling you into... oh god, a bedroom, alone, the two of you. “Whas goin on?” 

After he had closed the door he guided you to the bed, making you sit down, he looked at you intensely, “I know you like me,” as you opened your mouth getting ready to say something, the hand he was holding, he pulled making you push forward and resting your other hand on his shoulder, “You’ve been staring at me a lot more since I left your place a couple weeks back, and don’t think I didn’t notice how you always blush when passing in the halls. Just say it Y/N.”  

Your cheeks were burning, he was so close, you could feel his breath fanning your face, opening your mouth, a small croak came from your throat making you close your mouth swallowing before going again, “Yer still wit-” 

“Say it.” 

The quiet of his voice made you throw caution to the wind, “Okay, fine... Jack... I like you.” Closing the distance, you kissed him, your breath halting in your throat, his lips aren’t as soft as the few girls your previously kissed, reaching up and cupping his jaw, it was firmer, sharper. A boy, not a girl, your mind reeled with the sensation of your nerves being consumed with Jack, Jack, Jack. Feeling his hands grab at the flannel you were wearing and start pushing at it to slide it down your shoulders. Easing back, you gathered yourself, “Wait.” 

“Come on.” Pulling the shirt off his hands started going for your tank. 

“Hey, Jack.” Before you could say anymore, he kissed you again slowly working the top up, your body froze at hearing something in the room bang, blood running cold when laughter sounded from the closet. 

“Shit, I can’t hold it in Jack, fucking look at her.” The laughter echoed in your ears as you quipped your head around and watched as 2 boys stumbled out of the closet laughing. 

“Never seen so many rolls, jeez, ever heard of self-restrain piggy?” 

“What are they doin here?” You looked to Jack shocked, tears threatening to build as he smirking then shook his head. 

“I was close guys; this doesn't count against me since you guys interrupted.” 

“Wha-” 

“She would’ve stopped you anyways, she was trying.” 

“Unless you were just going to ignore her protests?” 

“Shut up, just keep recording, this will be good.” 

“Wait, recordin? Why, stop Jack!” You cried as he yanked your tank top up before holding you, arms pinned behind your back.  

The other 2 pulled their phones up recording, flashes on, catching everything, as you thrashed trying to get loose their laughter rung loud in the room, “You thought he liked you? What a joke, maybe you would’ve let him fuck you.” 

“Would’ve been an easy bet for Jack to win. How annoying, I thought she was a lesbian?” 

“Faking that shit for attention probably, knew no guy would want to be with a piggy unless there was something interesting about her.” 

“But to think that even a girl would find this attractive? Yeah right.” 

The tears were unstoppable, their horrible remarks burning and cutting into you, finally getting loose enough in his grasp, you dove down to your top slipping on your flannel running out crying, the others following and laughing, snorting at you. 

“Y/N?!” You didn’t stop to wait for Kieran as you made a mad dash home, climbing up and into your room. Your phone started ringing, seeing Kieran, you ignored it, ashamed and embarrassed. 

Through the weekend, you stayed away from your phone, the constant dings and ringing going ignored till it finally died. On Monday, your mother none the wiser of what had happened forced you to school. Walking up to the front you tried to ignore the laughs and people pointing at you, when you walked into the main hall, everyone was staring at you, your skin breaking out with goose bumps. Head down, you got to your locker, when you opened it, pictures and notes flooded out, you looked at as much as you could before your vision blurred. They were still images of the video, notes and drawings of pigs and insults, the worst, comments to harm yourself. “Y/N.” Looking up at Kieran, the worry written all over her face, you watched as she picked up all the papers and yanked them out of your locker yelling at everyone that was now huddled around you, phones out and laughing. After she had all the papers, she pulled you into a bathroom before you broke down, holding onto her. “Come to my house, let’s just skip today.” 

Following her to her place, you sat with her in her room, telling her what had happened when you and Jack went upstairs. She held you tightly throughout the whole ordeal, curing Jack and his stupid friends. It was only a few hours before the both of you jumped at her door opening, her father stepping in looking at the both of you, “Why did you skip out of school? What’s going on here?” 

“Dad, listen, please just understand we have very valid reasons, just...” She looked at you hesitantly, “Can’t say right now.” 

“Can’t? Or won’t?” He looked over at you, “No child of mine skips school, what’s going on?” 

Before she came up with anything you started standing up grabbing your back, “I’m sorry sir, it was my fault, I pulled her out of the school and suggested we skip.” 

“Y/N.” 

“Why?” 

Making your way to the door you tried to squeeze past him, but his hand shot out blocking you, “No reason sir, please ju-” 

“We should just tell him, he will help yo-” 

“Don’t Kieran.” 

“What happened?” 

“Nothing!” Pushing his hand down, you bolted out and started making your way home. Going to your room you charged your phone and saw every notification start to pop up, messages from anyone and everyone from school laughing at the video and calling you. Silencing it you laid in your bed crying, shortly, your mom came home screaming at you as she climbed the stairs. 

“What in the hell did you fucking do?!” As she slammed your door open, the hatred in her eyes burned into you, “My boss just called me and told me you whored yourself at some fucking party? What fucking party did you go to?!” 

“What? How-” Keiran told him, you snapped your mouth shut, you couldn’t believe she told him. You knew she was trying to look out for you, but damnit if you weren’t made at her for saying anything. 

“Answer me! Don’t you dare play dumb; there’s video evidence of you screwing someone? Have you lost your damn mind?! Everything I fucking do, and this is how you repay me?!” You glared at her as she went on; How is this my fault? Why is she insisting it’s my fault? 

“I didn’t do ANYTHING on purpose! They forced me and recorded me!” She glared at you before turning on her heel leaving slamming the door behind herself. You sighed walking to the door locking it before grabbing your phone and computer, pulling skype up you called Dominic. While the ringing was going you opened your bank app, checking what you had before opening a new tab on your computer for flights. 

“Y/N, wha-” 

“Ye remember a while ago when ye suggested I move out that way to just run away?” 

“Yeah?” He looked at you skeptically, “Are ye-” 

“I’m buying a ticket as we speak, I will be there in two days.” 

“Woah, lass, whas go-” 

“Please, Dom, jus... tell me now if I can’t stay with ye till I find my dad so I can figure something else out for hiding.” 

“Of course, ye can stay with me, but lass, what the hell happened?” 

Booking the flight ticket you took a deep breath, trying to hold the tears back, being tired of crying you didn’t want to shed anymore. You told him everything that had happened over the weekend, the party, letting your phone die and having a mental break down to the crap that happened at school, your friend telling her dad who is your mom's boss. Finally, the yelling match with your mom that just transpired. When you finished, he slammed back into his chair huffing, “Jesus Christ lass... what te fuckin hell? Firs off, yer more tan welcome here, ma and pa have been wantin to meet ya bad and when they hear bo-” 

“No, please Dom. Please don’t say anything bou-” 

“Lass, listen, I’m real fuckin sorry bout was happen to ye, but we gotta tell them somethin. They are goin to won-” 

“Tell them, I’m coming to find my dad, which won be a lie, ye jus don need to tell them the other shit. Please Dom? PlEaSe? I’m beggin ye.” 

He was quiet a moment, but he relented, “Fine, but they ask more questions, we tell them lass.” 

“Fine.” 

The two of you hashed out the rest of your plan, you’d stay low at home, steering clear of your mom for the next day before calling a cab to take you to the airport the following day, ignoring her and creating distance was a piece of cake, she was still irate with you and constantly trying to think up of lies to tell her boss about your ‘mistake’. 

When the time came, right as soon as your mom was out the door, you grabbed your 2 bags and made a mad dash to the cab that waited out front, sliding in, you felt like everything was moving on X2 speed, the drive to the airport, getting through tsa, and waiting to board. Your heart pounded in your chest; you were finally leaving your mom, and going to look for your dad, you remembered faintly the areas he would take you and replayed every detail hoping that when you get there if you can’t find him, then at least his wife. When your phone started ringing, you slowly looked at it before staring, Kieran, she had no clue what you were doing. You had ignored her calls and texts yesterday and the previous night, you knew she would and is still worried about you. You wanted to tell her what you were doing but didn’t know any more if you could trust her not to tell her dad and then eventually report you running away. Damnit though if the guilt of her worry and self-blame didn’t eat at your conscience, sliding the answer across your screen you lifted the phone to your ear. 

“Oh my god! Y/N! I’ve been trying to reach you! Listen, please, I’m so sorry for telling my dad, but he needed to know! Please understand I only told him because he would help. He said he talked to your mom, but she called the cops to file a report.” The momentary silence lasted long enough for you to sigh, “H-how was it making the report? Did they say what they would do?” When you didn’t respond, you heard her sniffle, “Please, Y/N, I’m so-” 

“Don worry bout me anymore Kieran. I’ll be okay.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Jus don worry, I’m not mad at ye, well...not anymore.” 

“Y/N, where are you? You turned your location off.” 

You looked up at the boarding sign, “I’m goin home, I’ll see ye later okay?” 

“Oh, okay...Love you.” 

Swallowing, you grabbed your bags walking to the podium, “Bye Kieran.” You hung up quickly before turning your phone off and wrapping it in napkins and tossing it in a can passing by. 

Landing in Edinburgh Airport you hailed a cab and gave them Dominic’s address, you’d sent him money to buy you a new phone, so he knew the time window of when to expect you. Pulling up to a beautiful house I handed the driver some cash and started making your way to the front door. When it opened you smiled, Dom, in person quickly ran to you hugging and picking you up, “Jeez Dom, don’t break yer back.” You laughed, but when he set you down, a hard look on his face made you shut up. 

“Don be sayin no mean shit bout my best frien. I ain fraid to smack some sense into ye.” 

“An I an fraid to smack some sense into ye if you lay one hand on her.” You both turned to see his mom at the doorway with his father. 

A sheepish smile made its way onto his face, “I was only messin ma, promise.” 

“Hmhm” She hummed smiling walking down the path before smiling at you and wrapping her arms around you. “It’s so nice to finally meet ye hun.” 

“Oh, uh, thank ye fer lettin me stay here till I find my dad and mom.” You smiled back looking between her and her husband. 

“Come in dear.” He said grabbing your bags smiling, you all walked in, they lead you to the main room and sat you on the couch. While his mom got drinks for everyone you looked around, “When Dom said ye were comin to look fer ye father, I asked a few questions around town to see if anyone knew anything.” 

You looked at him shocked, “Oh, ye didn’t have to do tha, I don want to bother ye all while I stay here.” 

He shook his head, “I don mind one bit, I only wish I had some good news fer ye, with the lil I knew and Dom, not many people could really offer anything.” 

“I understand, there were a few places I remember visiting and going to many times when I was younger, I was goin to visit those places and ask around, if not fer them then at least my grandparents.” 

“Tomorrow, we’ll be more than happy to drive ye around and help.” 

And they did, it was a couple weeks of traveling and asking friends, and old connections till you found a small scrap of information. It was a long, short given to you by one of Dom’s dad’s old cop friends, but you didn’t want to leave no stone unturned. Going just outside of Edinburgh, you went to the address that was scribbled down, it was a long dirt driveway to a beautiful 2 story house, huge with hills and fields surrounding it. On one side there were highland and belted Galloway cows, the other side of the road was cheviot sheep, your heart was pounding a mile a minute in your ribs, your limbs felt heavy as you climbed out of the car, looking around. Everything felt so... 

“Can we help ye all?” That voice, your body felt like the earth was shaking, could feel every muscle trembling as you slowly turned around and ... It was like everything froze in time, tears weld in your eyes, even though it had only been 4 years, it was like you’d only just seen him yesterday. 

“Dad.” You whimpered; you covered your mouth. 

Looking you over, he swore he thought he was looking at a ghost, “Y/N?” Nodding your head, he took one step down the stairs before the both of you made a mad sprint for each other. The collision of you both slamming into each other, wrapping your arms around one another tightly, weeping into the others shoulder. He pulled back first, cupping your cheeks in his hands moving the hair from your face, “My god, Y/N. Yev grown so much.” You both laughed before going back into holding each other, it wasn’t until his wife came out asking what was going on till she saw you.  

“Oh my god, MA, PA!” She screamed before running to you laughing and hugging you.  

You looked to the door, your grandparents walked out confused, and slightly worried, but upon seeing you, God, they all had never felt so whole and complete, they all cocooned you into a bear hug. Only pulled apart to thank and welcome Dominic and his parents inviting them in.  

You never told anyone the truth of why you ran away and sought them out, you didn’t even have to worry about your mom making a report, when you had left she counted it as a silent blessing that she could move and start over fresh, she never thought you went back to your father, all that matter to her was that you were gone. Your dad and mom asked as often as they could to figure out the truth, but you only insisted that you missed them and decided enough was enough, you were going to find them no matter what. You’d told them and your grandparents that you were lesbian, not expressing that you were bi, they excepted you none the less, and you were sure they would still except you even if you told them, you were bi, but you weren’t going to be dating or seeing any guys for a very long time. Yes, you knew and understood not all men were the same, but that doesn’t change the fact that at the thought of being intimate with a guy had you breaking down and having an anxiety attack.  

It wasn’t for a long time till you found inner peace with yourself and what had happened to you those years ago, you just always kept to one rule when it came to guys. You were never going to get anywhere near intimate with one unless you guys were a serious thing; no one nightstands, no games, no bets, no lies. 

[intothestars23]

So I finally finished Onyx Storm a few weeks ago and have been wanting to write out my overall thoughts, and I'm finally getting to it lol (I've been so busy between work, theatre, and home stuff😅)

Anyway so my general overall opinion is that I enjoyed it for the most part, but I definitely enjoyed the first 2 books more. I also felt some personal frustrations while reading, but I'll talk more about those in the reblogs or something. I just wanna keep the main post about the positives for now😊

!Onyx Storm Spoilers!

What I loved:

Dain fucking Aetos. If you had told me going into this book that Dain would be one of my absolute favorite parts, I would've said "lol yeah sure" but here we are. He delivered gold in every scene he was in tbh and I loved it. He really showed up, quipped a bit, got publicly disowned but handled it like a champ, supported Violet without question, struggled with being a translator, got salty when Aaric showed him up, and partook in some serious sexual tension with Sloane and I love that for him. Character👏 growth👏 I love his character arc over the 3 books and I hope he continues to grow. And maybe Dain & Sloane are the real enemies-to-lovers haha❤️

Violet & Sawyer finally got some one-on-one time! Before this book, if I recall correctly, I don't believe they ever had a full scene that was really just the 2 of them. Usually if Sawyer was there, so was Rhiannon and/or Ridoc. As one of the few Sawyer fans, I've been dying for a scene with just Violet & Sawyer to show more of their individual bond with each other; and that chapter between the 2 of them where he finally mounted Sliseag was one of my favorite chapters in the book, if not my favorite. It was so cute and sweet❤️ And I loved the interaction between Sawyer & Sliseag, too, because we got to see a little bit of their dynamic. And the fact that Sliseag apparently blames himself for Sawyer losing his leg??🥺😭 I wish we had found out what Sliseag said to Sawyer to get him to finally accept the accommodation, though. I thought we would find out and I'm kind of bummed that we didn't. Either way, I'm glad Sawyer accepted the accommodation and finally came to understand that it doesn't make him a lesser rider❤️ I just love Sawyer tbh

Violet being a boss occasionally. I lived for the moments where Violet stood her ground. It doesn't matter who she was talking to, I just live for women standing their ground and telling people how it is. Whether it's demanding her & Andarna's wants/needs to the Senarium, telling the guy with the tigers (can't remember his name) how it's gonna be, or simply saying that she doesn't need a protector. I ate it up everytime bc that's my girl. I just wish she stood up for herself more, you know?

Cat & Trager were so cute...😭 It takes some talent to take 2 characters I initially couldn't give a shit about, make me not only care about them but genuinely like them, make me root for them and be happy for them... and then rip my heart out (or rather shoot an arrow through my heart) all in the same book🥲

Violet living for the tea in other people's love lives. Every time someone blushed or made some insinuation, my girl really went👀 lmao so real of her tbh

Rhiannon & Ridoc teasing Sawyer about Jesinia was one of my favorite scenes. The squad getting Sawyer out of bed to alter the wardstone was another favorite, especially Ridoc's little brotherly tough love speech he gave him aghh. I'm telling you, Rebecca could just write a whole book about Violet & her friends and I would happily eat it up, I love these 5 so much❤️

Rhiannon being a certified badass at every turn

Ridoc being Ridoc at every turn

If anything happens to Broccoli/Carrot, we riot😤

Speaking of which, Mira being the best kitten mom and giving her little chin scratches🥺 Also, just Mira❤️

Ok the reveal of Aaric's signet was kinda cool. I had been wondering if he somehow had some sixth sense. I didn't know precognition could be a signet but I suppose it makes sense if retrocognition is one lol. My only gripes with it are: 1. Did Aaric not realize that was his signet? Why else would he not just tell Violet that he was able to see the future. Why wouldn't he mention it at all if it could possibly help them? Lmao Aaric wth💀 2. Why would Violet not take just a second to open the box he gave her right away. I know it's for dramatic storytelling purposes lol but still. My curious ass would've opened it right away😅

Those are my thoughts for now! I might either reblog or make a separate post about the things I wasn't crazy about, but I just wanted to talk about what I enjoyed first❤️

[aftgphoenix]

How do you feel about Kevin ?

I'm not really sure what you are looking for, anon, so here's a random jumble of thoughts that I hope makes some sort of sense. Thank you so much for the ask!

I think he's such an interesting character and one that I wish we could learn more about. I would love to learn more about his childhood with his mom and then his experiences at the Nest! I wonder if Kayleigh was a good mom, if she spent a lot of time with Kevin, if she let him explore other interests aside from exy. Imagine little Kevin dragging his Mom through different historical sites as they travel around the world for exy! Once Kevin's in the Nest, I keep thinking about Riko and how his friendship with Kevin developed into them being "brothers" and Kevin being Riko's pet. Imagine the slow slide as Riko let his sadistic side grow. I think it probably got noticeable worse when Jean arrived but I imagine it was already bad before then.

With what we do know, though, I think he's hiding a boatload of trauma that he'll likely keep repressing as long as he can until everything implodes. I would love to see him really start working through that in his fourth and fifth years with the foxes with Betsy. Actually, that would be a super cool fic to read! If anyone knows of any/writes one, please let me know!

His growth in the series was really cool to read too. He is still learning how to be his own person with his own thoughts, interests, and personality. He's learning how to be brave and to take a stand against his abusers. He's learning how to overcome the cult mindset from the Nest and he's learning to let Riko go. He's learning how to live a life with more than just exy and to care for others in a way that wasn't allowed in the Nest. He will always be connected to exy, but I think even if he had been raised in a healthy place, he still would have been exy-obsessed. I mean, his mom created the game and his dad is an exy coach (and presumably a really good player prior to that).

I hope he's able to find healthier ways to cope than getting drunk. He deserves so much better than that. (On a side note, my husband's family has struggled with alcoholism and it isn't fun at all. It tears apart families and can cause a lot of negative impact on the kids, even without an abusive aspect.) I understand why he does it, though, because I can't imagine having to live with the memories he does. I mean, watching Nathan kill that man would be traumatic enough but Kevin has seen so much more than that and I know it haunts him.

Unpopular opinion, I know, but I also like him with Thea. I like the idea of him falling in love with someone who isn't very familiar with exy but I just don't think that's very likely to happen. Instead, I like to imagine that he and Thea get a boatload of therapy and rekindle their relationship, first as friends, relearning about each other, then moving into a romantic relationship while they process the absolute horrendousness that the Nest's sexual culture was (what do you mean Riko was in the room? Yikes!!!). 

He's definitely one of my top favorite characters (but let's be real, I have about twenty favorite aftg characters). I love reading fics about him! Hopefully this makes sense and maybe answers your question? Either way, I had a lot of fun writing this all out! I love getting asks, so thank you!!!

[musicfeedsmysoul12]

Ngl a Twilight with 'Edythe Cullen' would have been more interesting (if the writer knew what they were doing), as someone that only knows the barebones of Twilight. With how old Edythe is, she'd have gone through some BULLSHIT before more modern times, and even then.

Joined with a rebellious Bella who's at the age of questioning her sexuality? Which is probably another thing to add to the problems with her mother?

Damn.

Oh I have put so much thought into this:

Bella has been quietly questioning her sexuality but isn't 'out' to her mom because while Renee is a free spirit, as she would say, the woman would be weird about her daughter liking girls.

Charlie I imagine is fully accepting and Bella notices when during some time with him he's complaining about the asshole teenagers he arrested for harassing some gay couple. She probs him a bit about herself, and he's a cop; he catches on. Fully accepting, not half-hearted.

This is also why Bella moves to Forks. Renee and Phil are going off. Before boarding the plane, Bella tells Renee 'I'm into girls' and vanishes.

Que like a million messages demanding Bella explain. Charlie also gets emails about 'camps' for Bella.

Let's move Twilight to the present day for simplicity because today's environment accepts it. Or well more than the early 2000s.

Edythe is not precisely in the closest, but she isn't out to anyone either. Her family know because they met a gay vampire couple, and Edythe went, 'Wait, you can DO that?'

Let's keep Jacob a boy so we have a bisexual love triangle and for shits and giggles, Renee supports Jacob being with Bella while Charlie is in favour of Edythe.

Forks I imagine is conservative but with an accepting police chief (who also has fired multple racist dicks from his force along with homophobic ones) it's also fairly accepting. Of course we have some dicks who are anti-gay and a few who think Bella is 'confused'.

Jacob is not one, by the way. He thinks that's gross. He just likes Bella and thinks vampires aren't good.

I think the whole James thing and the fight in Twilight where Bella leaves is changed. Instead they tell Charlie Edythe's psycho ex (who they moved to leave behind) before she came out is around and he's targeting both girls. Charlie is now on hyper alert and while he wants Bella safe, agrees that them getting the hell out of dodge is better.

The ballet studio is set up as the ex managing to corner Bella, and Renee tries to use this to make Bella come home and be normal. t turns into an almost custody battle until the judge just goes 'wtf the kid is sixteen, into girls and she can choose not to go with her homophobic mom'.

I think Edythe's issues about her soul are a little better here because she's gay as fuck my guy. She met way too many great gay people to think that it's a sin. So she isn't as involved in matters of the soul.

She doesn't like being a vampire and doesn't want Bella to be one, but she acknowledges that it's Bella's choice. As a woman, she respects other women's wishes for their bodies. She tells Rosalie this, who is not happy with how it's worded, but... point taken.

New Moon and Eclipse... part of me says most of it's tossed into the trash because Edythe understands boundaries way better being a woman. Alice (I love you, girl, but...) is taken to task when she tries to tempt them. So, there was no big party incident. However, New Moon does have Edythe leave, but that's due to issues with the Volturi and... can we say a guy vampire who's been trying to force her into a relationship? Yeah that. It's told that her psycho ex is back in town, so she and Bella fake a break-up. It works oddly. (Charlie is in on it too.)

Bella hangs out with Jacob more because she likes Jessica and Angela (and Lauren because she's a girls girl here) she also isn't happy with... lets say Tyler and Mike who keep bugging her about maybe dating them. The girls square up cause of the boys being gross, but she hangs with Jacob, who she's firmly put into the brother category.

Actually, there is no love triangle here, tbh. Jacob is into Bella but he clocks she isn't into him at all, so he's respectful cause he grew up with two sisters who would kick his ass if he did anything.

He isn't happy she is with a vampire so that's the conflict.

So... yeah, that was a good part of my throughts?

[nijigasakilove]

Ohh Makoto my beloved how I missed you! They delivered an absolute banger as well wow so much good stuff here. Amazing depiction of someone coming to terms with their sexual identity and gender. The best episode yet.

First of all Ryuji and Makoto misunderstanding about Ryuji’s crush is hilarious. Poor Makoto thinks they’re being a good wingman with Ryuji and Aoi but all he wants is you, silly!

“What would you do if I wanted to be a girl” I LOVE LOVE LOVE. The conversation between Makoto and their dad in the car, started tearing up a bit. The dad doesn’t miss a beat, doesn’t get upset or anything just pure understanding and love for his child and the desire to see Makoto happy no matter what gender it is. It’s so beautiful to see a moment like that in anime. I just wish they could get Makoto mom onboard too. Normally mothers are the more nurturing and understanding ones..

I loved Aoi and Makoto basketball club conversation too which served as a double entendre for Makoto’s gender situation too. If you’re not sure about being either one, you don’t have to be! You just have to be true to yourself and live your life the way you want to. On the literal side of things, the basketball club captain being so understanding of Makoto not wanting to fully commit to the team is so sweet. Where tf can a hs like this be found because normally kids this age are so judgemental lol

The school festival planning and start went great! Makoto and the others in their maid outfits are so cute, but that ending 😭 They’ve been building up Ryuji finally confessing but man I didn’t expect it to happen like this. I wonder how he’ll explain the picture of Makoto he keeps, if they’ll brush it off or if he’ll finally have to come face to face with his feelings. Need that next ep badly

[apomaro-mellow]

Got inspired by this

Steve regretted laughing. Which is something he never thought he'd feel. But as he cackled at something Robin said, he saw the look on Dustin's face and wished he could take the laugh back. Robin went to go and show a customer something and Dustin slid over to him.

"Remind me again how she isn't 'the one'?"

"She's a one. One of a kind. The kind I don't wanna lose by asking her out."

"Whatever happened to the Harrington charm?", Dustin asked.

"Doesn't work on girls like Robin." Steve ignored him by trying to escape to the backroom. Of course Dustin followed, employees only be damned.

"I don't even think you've tried. Which confuses me. But what's got me even more confused is how you've seemed to stop trying altogether."

"Why are you so invested in my love life, huh?"

"Ew, gross", Dustin winced. "I'm not invested. I'm just tired of hearing you whine about never finding love-"

"I don't whine!"

"SO just ask her out already. Even if she says no, you can still be friends. Like Jonathan and Nancy."

Steve rolled his eyes. Then saw a lightbulb go off in Dustin's head.

"Well since Nancy's single again-"

"I'm gay!"

For the first time ever Dustin shut his trap. Steve thought he should get a trophy for this. Except he realized what he just said. Dustin, with all the grace of someone who had just been blindsided, hugged Steve tight.

"I'm...I'm here for you, man."

It was so sweet that it made Steve feel like shit. But only a little. Because now Dustin couldn't keep trying to matchmake him and Robin. Or Nancy.

Turns out the love boat only stopped for a couple days.

Steve was hanging out in his room when he heard footsteps approach. Dustin came in without a single knock.

"Um, hello? How did you get in?"

"Some lady let me in."

Steve raised a brow. "You mean my mom?"

Dustin shrugged. "Yeah, I guess. Anyway, what about Gary?"

"....Who? For what?"

"Gary? He works at the art supply store. He's gay, why not him?"

Steve shot up and shut his door like a zombie was coming. "What the fuck are you talking about Henderson?!", he hissed quietly.

"Gay people deserve love too, Steve. So how about it?"

Steve rubbed his face. Forget about how Dustin knew about some random dude's sexuality, apparently he wasn't one to be deterred.

"You can't just set me up with any guy. Or any gay guy."

"You've slept around with just any girl? Why are guys different? Seems pretty discriminatory Steve."

He wanted to strangle this kid. More than that though, he wanted to go back and slap his past self. He could have said anything. Said he was into old ladies-no, then Dustin would be sending him on blind dates to the senior center.

It felt like the only thing to get Dustin off his case would be if he was in a serious relationship with someone.

Then a second person came into his room without knocking and Steve wondered if he should be walking around naked more.

It was Jonathan.

And Steve got another bright idea.

"I can't just go out with anyone. Because I'm already dating Jonathan."

"What?!", two voices shouted out and Dustin gave Jon a look.

"Why do you sound surprised?"

Jonathan looked to Steve for help and Steve tried to convey the best he could with his eyes.

"I...we never....put a label on it....?"

Steve could kiss him if he was at all interested in men. To sell it a little better, he put an arm around his shoulders. Dustin was left speechless for the second time in a week and Steve was definitely putting it in his journal for posterity.

This time he gave them both pats on the back and walked out silently.

"Don't tell anyone!", Steve shouted behind him, then closed his bedroom door.

"Hey, um, the hell?", Jonathan asked.

"Thank you for being so cool with that."

"I'm learning to be more chill. But still, explain?"

Steve told him the whole story as they sat on his bed and through it all, Jonathan looked nothing but understanding.

"So, how long do we need to pretend to be boyfriends?"

"Who says we need to pretend?", Steve raised a brow.

"You just told Dustin."

"It's a secret we're keeping", Steve said, getting up to pace about his room. "Which means we just act normal. Later we can tell Dustin we broke up."

"How much later?"

Steve pondered. "....Once I'm engaged?"

"Steve!"

"Jonathan, please?"

He looked conflicted. This just seemed like a lot of stupid work just to convince Dustin. "You get 2 months? Got it? Put it on your calendar."

"Thank you! I'll do it right now!" Steve grabbed a pen and went over to the calendar that hung on the wall. He went to February 3rd and put a broken heart on the date.

"Subtle."

"No one else looks at this thing. Alright. If our break up is bad enough maybe Dustin will stop butting his head in."

"What if the others find out?", Jonathan asked.

"No one else is gonna know."

----------------------------------

Lucas had been noticing that Dustin had that weird grin on his face for the past week. The 'I know something you don't know' grin. While sitting in Steve's living room, shoulder to shoulder with Max, who he nudged.

"You notice anything off with Dustin?"

"You mean more than the usual offness? Yes, actually."

"What do you think it is?", Lucas asked.

Will came to sit on Lucas' other side. "My guess is he has a secret. But what, I don't know."

"So it's pretty obvious, right?", Lucas said.

"No, I said as much to Mike and he said I was being crazy and that Dustin wouldn't keep anymore secrets after Dart."

Their eyes went over to Dustin, who was grinning at the group who was deciding on the movie they were gonna watch. Steve and Eddie were in a heated conversation while Jonathan was trying to be a mediator.

Steve was flapping around a vhs so hard it threatened to sail across the room and Jonathan grabbed his wrist to still it, scared for the innocent movie.

"Get a room, you lovebirds", Dustin called out.

All eyes turned towards him.

Part 2

[jellesreid]

Reunion of the heart: pt2

Pt2 of Reunion of the Heart in which JJ and Elle tell JJ’s kids about them being a couple and then there’s a time jump to their life as a married couple.

masterlist

word count: 5.1k

tags: Bisexual Jennifer Jareau, Lesbian Elle Greenaway, Mom JJ, Mom Elle, Dad spencer reid, step mom Maeve, marriage, living together, coming out, lawyer, FBI agent, love, pets, proposing, family, married life, wlw, fem for fem, life with kids time jumps.

warnings: mentions of past sexual assault

notes: guys i’m so so sorry it took me so long to post this part 2 but I really hope you enjoy and appreciate any like and comments!

—————————❣️————————

Four months into their relationship, JJ thought it would finally be the right time to tell Henry and Micheal about her and Elle. Micheal was probably too young to understand but she wanted them to know now that Elle had moved closer and would be spending more time with them.

Their relationship was going really well and they tried to talk on the phone at least once a day unless they both had busy cases they were working on. Over the past few months, JJ had also built a strong connection with Alya and they often texted multiple times during the week.

Elle's phone screen lit up, it was JJ calling, she had taken the week off work to visit her girlfriend but she was on a case in California and wouldn’t be back at least until tomorrow or the next day so that resulted in Elle staying in bed, she had things to do but she was lacking motivation.

She answered the call placing it on the bedside table, “Hi baby,” she mumbled sleepily.

“Hi babe, are you in bed?” JJ checked her watch to work out the time there.

“Yeah, I’m not feeling it today i miss you.”

“I miss you too but I called to tell you we are now getting on the jet so I’ll be back by tomorrow. Also, I was thinking about telling the boys.”

“I’ll be there as soon as you’re back. Are you sure you’re ready to tell them?” Elle didn’t want her to feel pressured.

“More than ready. Do you think it’s something we should do together?” JJ asked.

“I'd like more than anything to do it together but you’re their mother, how you tell them is your decision.”

“I’ll wait until we are together, maybe we could tell them over dinner tomorrow? Do you think you will get there before then?”

“Mhm, I took the whole week off work,” Elle smiled more when she was on the phone to JJ, hearing her voice made her so much happier.

“You did? I thought it was just a couple of days?” JJ said surprised.

“Surprise! It wasn’t all for you though sorry honey, I’m going through some procrastination and motivation issues right now too taking a break will help me.”

“Oh baby, I’m sorry I wish I could help with that. What about Alya and school? Is she staying home on her own?” JJ asked rather worried.

“I spoke with her teachers she’s already ahead of all her classes, AP classes included so as long as she gets the work done she can do it from yours, or Spencer’s.”

“Oh great! AP too? Wow,” JJ laughed.

Elle hummed, “Someone took her father’s genius gene.”

“Honey you sound off, are you sure you want to come?” The blonde tone was laced with concern and Elle could tell.

“Of course, I’m fine, I just miss you and I wish I was doing some work right now but I’m really stuck with it, I need some kind of lawyer breakthrough and I’m hoping it will happen when I’m back with you,” Elle explained.

“I wish I could kiss you through the phone.”

“Me too, that would give me motivation,” Elle laughed.

“I’ll give you so many kisses when I see you,” JJ paused and Elle could faintly hear another voice in the background saying they needed to board the plane, “I’ve got to go.”

“I heard,” Elle frowned, “Stay safe my love, I’ll be packing after I pick Alya up. I love you, so much,” Elle said into the phone.

“I love you more baby,” JJ blew a kiss into the phone speaker before she ended the call.

The call from JJ had given the brunette enough energy to get out of bed and re-pack things she had taken out of her suitcase when her trip to see JJ was delayed.

She went into her daughter’s room to make sure she had almost everything packed up so they could finish anything tonight and leave tomorrow morning.

——————

JJ boarded the plane after hanging up the phone with Elle a smile still playing on her lips.

“Elle?” Spencer asked when they were sat down.

“Yeah, she was telling me how good Alya is doing at school,” JJ smiled.

“I know my smart girl is doing so well,” Spencer beamed talking about his daughter. He really did love her so much.

“How are you and Elle doing?” Derek asked turning to JJ.

“Really well, We are telling Henry and Micheal about us tomorrow,” JJ smiled widely.

“How do you think they will take it? They are only young,” Emily joined into the conversation.

“They love Elle, they either won’t understand or they’ll be really happy I would think but I’m not nervous about it.”

“Well, I hope it goes well,” Emily smiles.

——————

“Mom, are you okay?” Alya asked Elle when she zoned out for the 5th time while driving nearly missing the red light.

“Yeah sorry honey,” Elle braked firmly.

“That’s the fifth time mom, pull over if you’re distracted.”

“It’s just a case I’m thinking about, let’s talk instead. Is there anyone at school you’re interested in?” Elle teased now focusing on the road.

“Ew no, Dad told me how many germs you contract just by shaking someone’s hand, imagine that figure if you hug or kiss someone,” Alya scrunched her nose.

Elle laughed, “Well that’s one way to do it.”

“Do what?” Alya turned her head to look at her mom tilting her head.

“To make sure you don’t date until you’re about… 30 I think we agreed on,” Elle smiled.

“Fine by me,” She shrugged, “How much further?”

“About twenty minutes.”

“Are you happy that you’re going to be back with JJ?”

“The happiest I love the weeks I can spend with her,” Elle’s dimples showed with her smile.

“What do you do?”

“We spend time with you, Henry and Micheal as a family, watch movies, take naps, talk about work, help the boys with homework, cuddle, make dinner together,” Elle shrugged.

“I wish they lived with us so you could always be this happy mama,” Alya frowned a little.

“What do you mean? I’m more than happy with just you and me baby.”

“You miss working for the FBI, you miss the people there too. You miss JJ when she isn’t around your eyes lose the happy sparkle of love, You feel bad about the time I’m not spending with Dad and something is bothering you so much with a case at work that you’ve fallen into a depressive state the last few days,” Alya listed one thing after another not stopping at her mom's jaw-dropping halfway through her statement.

Elle looked at her rather impressed, “I guess this is what I get for giving you two sets of profiler genes,” she paused, “I’m not ready to talk about work with you, the case is personal to me and it’s something I’m not ready to tell my daughter. You’re right I miss all the things you told me I miss but leaving the FBI was my fault I have to deal with those consequences plus I don’t want to leave you alone countless times a month you need a stable parent and I’ve built up this law firm I can’t just abandon it for something that wouldn’t work out.”

“Mama.. did something happen to you?” Alya asked concerned.

“I’m fine baby it was a long time ago,” Elle pulled up outside Spencer’s, “Let me know when you want to stay at Jay’s we will set your room up.”

“Okay Mommy, I love you,” Alya leaned over the console to hug her.

“I love you too baby have fun with your dad,” Elle kissed her daughter’s head just before she got out of the car.

——————

Elle unlocked the front door of JJ’s house, it was only 6:45 am so she knew both her girlfriend and her sons would be asleep in bed, she couldn’t wait to get up the stairs to surprise her girlfriend in bed with the bouquet of pink tulips, they weren’t her girlfriends favourite but they were a close second.

Elle left her suitcase in the hallway not wanting to bang around trying to get it upstairs the last thing she wanted was to wake the boys up when they had to be up soon for school. She crept up the stairs flowers in hand, walked to the end of the corridor and slowly pushed the bedroom door open but her girlfriend was already awake.

“Babe, what are you doing awake?” Elle pouted.

“I sensed you, get into bed, I’ve missed you,” JJ created a space for Elle. When the older woman wasn’t there she slept in the middle of the bed so it didn’t feel like she was missing her beside her.

“Where should I put the flowers?” Elle asked.

JJ rubbed her eyes to take a better look, “Aw babe I didn’t notice that thank you, I love you. Just leave them on the side they will be fine without water for an hour.”

“I love you too Jay,” Elle said putting the flowers on the side and getting into bed with her.

JJ immediately snuggled up to her, “Alya messaged me.”

“Saying?”

“To distract you from whatever you’ve been thinking about,” JJ ran her thumb across Elle’s bottom lip.

“I wish you could but I don’t think you can,” Elle sighed.

“Then tell me about it so it isn’t consuming your brain,” JJ ran her fingers all over Elle she wanted to touch her everywhere.

Elle's eyes closed, “In college, I was sexually assaulted… um by a guy I was friends with, turns out I wasn’t the only person he did it to, one of the girls he choked to death. It was an accident but at least that gave him a longer prison sentence he probably wouldn’t have gotten that long for sexual assault. He is being re-tried for the murder and his case was sent to me to be his defence attorney.”

“Baby open your eyes, you’re okay I’m here,” JJ rubbed her hand up and down her back, “You’re obviously not taking his case no way but I’m sorry he did that to you I really am,” JJ frowned.

A tear fell from Elles's eye, “Alya keeps asking questions but I don’t want her to know, I wasn’t strong that night, I don’t want her to think I’m weak. What if I don’t take the case and he gets out, I don’t want him out he deserves to be there forever.”

“I know baby I’m sorry,” JJ kissed her forehead, “I’ll see if I can sort it, try and get some sleep.”

Elle fell asleep quickly wrapped in JJ’s arms.

After school, the boys had swimming club which gave Elle just enough time to start dinner, every time she stayed over she liked to cook for them and since they were telling the boys about their relationship tonight she thought it would be the perfect night to surprise them.

When they arrived home the boys ran into the kitchen with JJ following not far behind.

“Mmm, what are you cooking?” JJ asked standing behind Elle wrapping an arm around her waist without the boys seeing.

“Lasagna, I was going to make a Cuban dish my mom made sometimes but I felt Italian would be better for the boys,” Elle said stroking the top of JJ’s hand.

“Hm, you’re probably right about that but I’d love for you to make the dish sometime.”

“Mom how long till dinner!” Henry asked standing on the kitchen chair.

“Henry get down from there you’ll hurt yourself. Not long.”

“Elle, what making?” Micheal asked hugging the side of her leg.

“I’m making dinner for you and your brother,” Elle stroked Michael’s hair.

Micheal loved Elle, every time she was over he was attached to her side, he would beg her to play dinosaurs and watch movies and read him bedtime stories.

The four of them ate dinner together and just as Henry was about to get up and go back to his bedroom JJ stopped him.

“I have something I want to tell you, boys,” she started.

“What is it, mommy?” Micheal asked.

“So you both know Elle comes here as often as she can and when she does she stays for the week, it’s because we have been seeing each other,” JJ said.

“We’ve been seeing her too silly mommy,” Henry added.

“Right, I mean Elle and I are dating, we love each other,” JJ tried to explain it simply.

“Elle, is mommy too?” Micheal asked.

“Not exactly, Elle is mommy’s girlfriend.”

“I love Elle but we have a daddy I love daddy too,” Henry said with a frown.

“I love daddy, I’ll always love him but he isn’t here anymore Henry, He will always be your daddy that will never change and everyone will always love him but I love Elle too.”

“And you love mommy?” Henry asked Elle.

“Yes, I love her a lot.”

“Can Lya be my sister?” He asked.

“I suppose,” Elle laughs.

“Kay I’m fine with it,” Henry smiles.

“What about you Micheal?” JJ asked to include the young boy even though he was most likely confused.

“Elle can move in!” Micheal said enthusiastically nodding his head.

“That will do,” JJ laughed and Elle joined her.

——————

2 years later

Elle and Alya moved in with JJ and the boys around the time of the women’s first anniversary and they had gotten engaged a few months ago on their 2nd anniversary together.

The family had grown a lot closer since moving in together often on days off JJ spent time with Alya and Elle spent time with the boys or they spent time all together. Elle still ran the law firm in DC but she only went to the office a maximum of two days a week she enjoyed working at home a lot more especially since one day a week she was able to join JJ at work and help out.

JJ had kissed Elle goodbye and whispered to her that she loved her at 4 am that morning, Elle had heard and responded but when she woke up without JJ by her side she always panicked a little however in her space today was Micheal, if he heard JJ leaving for work he would often join Elle in bed so she wouldn’t feel lonely.

When Micheal saw Elle open her eyes he placed a sloppy kiss on her cheek, “Hi mama.”

Elle kissed the blonde waves on the top of his head, “Morning baby.”

“Breakfast time? Dinosaur pancakes?” He gave her puppy dog eyes.

Elle nodded, “Yeah I’ll make them, Can you see if your brother is awake please?” She looked over at the clock as Micheal scrambled out of the bed.

The brunette wrapped a robe around herself before going to her daughter’s room. She knocked softly on the door, “Lya are you up?”

Alya opened the door, “Yeah mama,” she spun around to draw her mom’s attention to show that she was already dressed and had her hair done.

“Pretty honey. Are you getting the bus?”

“No, Dad is picking me up he said I can drive to school,” Alya gave her a toothy grin, ever since she got her learner's permit last month she had been begging both of her parents to let her drive. JJ and Elle had both taken her out a few times separately but if she wanted to drive to school Spencer had to take her.

“He’s not at work?” Elle asked confused.

“No, why?”

Elle shrugged, “Jay left at like 4:30 this morning I assumed there was a case out of town.”

“Do you want me to look at her location?”

“No, I trust her if we didn’t trust each other it wouldn’t be a good relationship.”

“You can want to know where she is and still trust her mom,” Alya pulled out her phone and clicked the app, “Says she’s in the fields, did she go for a run?”

Elle looked at the time on her phone, “She left 3 hours ago.”

“Try calling her?” Alya suggested.

“Can you come downstairs and call while I make the boys pancakes?” Elle asked.

“Yeah, Dad will be here in about 15 by the way,” She read the notification from her phone.

Elle nodded and handed her phone to Alya while they went downstairs together. The teenager called JJ’s number but it had no answer.

Elle bit her lip anxiously as she cracked one of the eggs into the frying pan, “That’s weird, try again.”

Alya called it again but it went to voicemail.

“Okay, um try on your phone.”

Alya did as her mom said and called JJ’s number on her phone, the call rang once before going to voicemail, “Voicemail again, maybe she doesn’t have service.”

“When is your dad going to be here?” Elle said playing with the engagement ring on her finger.

Alya looked at the map to track how far he was, “8 minutes.”

“Okay,” Elle flipped the pancakes but Alya could see she was shaking.

“What’s wrong Mom?”

“Nothing, just worried I’m sure everything is fine though,” She placed the pancakes on two separate plates, “Could you take these to your brothers they can eat upstairs, help Micheal get dressed if he isn’t already.”

“You normally help him, are you really that worried?” Alya frowned.

“Yes I’m that worried, my fiancée left the house at 4 in the morning, her phone is showing up in the fields and she isn’t answering it. She’s an FBI agent it’s a dangerous job.”

“Okay, I’ll help Henry and Micheal, dad is just around the corner,” she said before she went upstairs.

Spencer was about to knock on the door when Elle opened it, “Woah hi, how did you know I was here?” He tried to read the expression on her face it seemed like panic, “What happened?”

“Alya was tracking you, I’m worried about JJ,” Elle let him through the door.

“Why where is she?” Spencer raised an eyebrow.

Elle explained to him everything that happened that morning leaving out no details.

“She didn’t mention going anywhere last night?” Spencer asked sitting down on the sofa and patting the space next to him.

“No, nothing. We watched an episode of some crime documentary and then went to sleep about an hour and a half after that finished.”

“What were you doing in the time before going to bed and finishing the episode?”

“Spence..”

“Oh! Yeah okay sorry. I’m going to take Henry and Micheal to school I want you to call Penelope she might be able to track her better,” Spencer hugged her.

“Okay, don’t tell them anything.”

“Did anyone else see her this morning?” Spencer asked when he remembered he hadn’t asked.

“Micheal maybe? He came into the bedroom not long after she left.”

Spencer nodded, “Call Garcia.”

——————

When Spencer left with the kids Elle sat back down on the sofa and dialled Penelope’s number. She put her head in her hands while it rang.

“Elle! What can I do for you, sweetheart?” Garcia answered in her usual joyous tone.

“Spence told me to call, JJ is missing? Alya tracked her but her phone was showing as being in a field, I don’t know, is there something you could do, please,” Elle said her voice cracking.

“Oh my god, Elle! Yes, I’m tracking right now 1 second.”

“Thank you.”

“No need to thank me. JJ’s location last pinged near the car park next to the field where she finishes her runs and it was there for twenty minutes, her cellphone was turned off almost an hour ago, I’m sorry pumpkin.”

“She’s hurt.. or worse, I’m going to be sick.”

“What did your baby daddy say?”

“Just to call you.”

“I can inform the team, wait maybe it’s to do with the stalker unsub he sent her flowers?”

“Excuse me, when did this happen?” Elle asked confused.

“A few weeks ago, Um I’m going to go and try tracking JJ again. I’ll call if I find anything,” Penelope hung up the phone.

Elle sat curled up in a ball waiting for Penelope to call back or Spencer to come back. It was now past 9 am.

Spencer had dropped by once to tell her that JJ’s car wasn’t in the parking lot where she was last tracked anymore.

10 minutes later a car pulled into the driveway and the front door opened.

“Spence?” Elle called out.

“No it’s me, babe,” JJ answered.

Elle got up from the sofa and walked toward the door, “Jennifer Jareau,” Elle scolded but took her into a tight hug.

“What happened?” JJ asked confused.

“I was so worried, your phone was switched off in the middle of the woods, you weren’t answering calls, you left at 4 am, and Penelope was tracing your phone too,” Elle hugged her tighter.

“Oh babe, I’m so so sorry, I wanted to surprise you. I didn’t mean to worry you… or my co-workers apparently.”

“Also you have a stalker?” Elle raised an eyebrow.

JJ sighed, “I didn’t want you to know.”

“Why not?” Elle frowned.

“The unsub is already stalking the entire team i didn’t want to expose you to it as well.”

“Are you safe? Are the kids safe?” Elle asked the worried look returning to her face.

“I think so,” JJ replied biting her lip.

“You think so? That’s not exactly good enough JJ, our children could be in danger.”

“We didn’t profile him to harm anyone if that helps.”

“No not really that doesn’t really help me,” Elle crossed her arms.

“Can we just forget this so I can show you your surprise, I think you’ll love it.”

Elle sighed, “Fine but when the kids come home we need to talk to them about this.”

“Yes, I agree,” JJ said while nodding, “It’s outside, come to the car.”

Elle followed JJ outside and closed her eyes when JJ asked. The brunette opened her eyes when she felt JJ put something in her arms.

“A kitten?” Elle gasped stroking the top of its head, “Why?” She asked looking up at her.

“I know you’ve always wanted one and it’s the third anniversary of our first date,” JJ smiled and tucked a piece of hair behind Elle’s ear, “You’re so beautiful I love you.”

“I love you too, I’m still mad but I love you so much. Thank you,” Elle left a small kiss on JJ’s lips.

“I think I deserve more than that,” The blonde woman smirked.

“Give me a minute I don’t want to squish my kitten,” Elle continued petting the kitten's head.

“Come inside, put the kitten down and kiss me,” JJ placed a hand on Elle’s waist.

The pair went indoors and Elle placed the kitten down on the living room floor before pulling JJ onto the sofa with her, immediately attaching her lips to hers.

“I love you,” Elle said when they broke apart for a minute.

“Isn’t there still a search party out for me babe?” JJ giggled.

“Oh yes! I need to call Spence, get off me,” Elle tapped JJ’s ass.

“Hey you pulled me on top of you,” JJ reached into Elle’s pocket pulling out her phone, “And I’m not moving it’s not every day I get to be in this position.”

“Because you’re my pillow princess,” Elle kissed JJ’s cheek a few times as the phone rang.

“Hey, I’m not-“ JJ was cut off by Elle shushing her just before she spoke into the phone.

“Yeah I’m all good Spence, JJ is home she was being really stupid and switched her phone off so I couldn’t track her location while she got me a present… JJ stop!” Elle screeched as JJ rested her fingers on the sides of Elle’s waist tickling her a little bit more each time she spoke.

Spencer cleared his throat, “Thanks for um telling me I should probably leave you both alone. Have fun,” Spencer paused, “Not that you are having fun I just- Have fun um together.. not like that unless you want to you know-“

“Spencer it’s fine,” Elle giggled, “We will have fun.”

Spencer stuttered a little bit before just deciding to hang up.

“You’re so evil that poor man,” JJ said.

“I'm evil? You’re evil when did you turn into the tickle monster?” Elle stuck her tongue out.

JJ shook her head and kissed Elle, “Got any plans today?”

“Mhm I’m making you the best dinner you’ve ever had,” Elle kissed her neck.

“And until then?” JJ moaned softly at the contact.

“Nothing apart from playing with that adorable kitten.”

“Bedroom?” JJ asked with a smiley smirk.

“After dinner?” Elle said.

“If we do it now we have a child-free house you can be loud,” JJ giggled.

“I can be loud? Honey that’s all you.”

“Come on,” JJ sat up and pulled on Elle’s arm.

——————

JJ went into the office in the afternoon which left Elle more than enough time to make a romantic dinner for her fiancée and collect the kids from school.

She ran into the store to get a few things for dinner before driving to the boy's school. She usually went through the drop-off and pick-up drive-through because Henry was at the age where he did not want his mama walking him in or picking him up but Micheal loved having Elle come into the school so today she decided she would.

When she walked into the playground she could see Micheal in a line of his classmates coming out of class.

The little boy jumped up and down waving at her and she gave him a small wave back waiting for him to be allowed over.

As she was waiting one of the moms she knew came and stood beside her, she was the mom of one of Michael’s friends but quite frankly Elle didn’t like her she had been weird about Elle collecting the boys from the school claiming it was their mother's job and not someone she had hired which offended her that she would speak of JJ that way and assume she was just some baby sitter and when Micheal had ran towards her calling her mama the woman’s skin paled every time but the first time she looked like she was close to vomiting which promoted Elle to state the obvious that JJ was her partner.

“How are you?” Elle asked faking a smile but not turning to look at her.

“Oh I’m fine, the usual you know husbands always arguing about work,” Sarah replied.

“Well no I wouldn’t know husbands,” Elle tried not to roll her eyes.

“Right, lesbian mhm. How are you, Elle?”

“Awesome.”

“Oh, really how come?” Sarah looked her up and down, “You’re dressed nicely? A new date?”

Elle shook her head, “Obviously not since I’m engaged. It’s mine and JJ’s first date anniversary she bought us a kitten.”

“That’s something you celebrate?”

“Yes Sarah, that’s something we celebrate.”

“Do all of your kind like cats I see that a lot online?”

Elle opened her mouth but no words came out as she looked at the woman rather shocked before shaking her head and just not responding, she walked toward the teacher so she could be closer to Micheal as he was next in line.

Micheal ran over to Elle wrapping his small arms around her as much as possible, “Mama! My teacher wants to talk to you!”

“Are you in trouble Mister?” Elle lifted him up and rested him on her hip.

“No mama I’m really good. Do you think Lya will help with my maths homework?”

“Oh, I’m sure she will you know that’s her favourite subject, let’s go talk to your teacher yeah?”

“Yeah!” Micheal said as Elle walked toward the teacher with the blonde boy still perched on her hip.

The teacher turned to them both with a big smile on her face, “Elle, hi.”

“Hi, was there something wrong Micheal said you wanted to talk to me?”

“Oh, it’s nothing bad I promise, I thought we could just catch up and I could give Michael’s sick form from today?”

“I don’t have much time for a catch-up today but why does he have a sick form? What happened?” Elle asked concerned looking over Michael’s face and could usually tell if he was ill.

“Another boy tripped him up on the playground, an accident of course, Micheal had an ice pack on his knee for a while.”

Elle stroked a hand over his hair, “Oh you’re a brave boy aren’t you baby? What happened?”

“Samual put his foot out and I tripped when I ran, he said I’m too smart because I read books,” Micheal pouted.

Elle turned back to the teacher, “That doesn’t sound like an accident to me.”

“Micheal and I spoke with Samual and he said it was an accident.”

“Micheal won’t be going near Samual I don’t want my child hurt again.”

“I’ll have to call Jennifer as she is his legal parent if that is going to happen,” The teacher avoided eye contact with her.

“That’s fine, I’ll speak with JJ at dinner but on Michael’s school forms I am listed as a legal parent so I’m not sure why it would be an issue,” Elle said before walking away, “Are you okay baby?”

Micheal nodded and snuggled his face in the crook of her neck, “Love you, mama.”

“I love you more, are you tired?”

“Mhm,” Micheal played with the neckline of her top as if it were his blanket.

——————

JJ arrived home at 7:30 pm, she gently threw her keys onto the table in the hallway, “Honey?” she called out but with no reply, she followed the smell of food to the kitchen where she spotted her fiancée.

“Hi baby,” Elle answered turning to look at the blonde, she wanted to catch her reaction to the room too.

“You did all of this while I was out?” JJ gasped at the fairy lights, candles and flowers covering their dining room.

“Mhm I didn’t want it to be tacky, it is a little but I tried. I’m making some of your favourite foods and the kids are with Maeve and Spence,” Elle said kissing JJ’s pink lips.

“You’re perfect I’d marry you right now if I could.”

“We could go to the courthouse,” Elle suggested again, she had suggested it many times but she knew JJ wanted a wedding with all of her friends and family there.

“Hm wouldn’t you like that,” JJ laughed, “I’m getting changed quickly. Thank you for this.”

Once she was back down the food was on the table, her seat already pulled out for her to sit down, a glass of wine on the table and soft classic music playing in the background.

The women ate talking about the kids, their wedding, school and upcoming vacations. Just as they finished Elle took JJ’s hand in hers and brought it to her lips kissing it, “Thank you for loving me.”

—————————❣️————————-

[new-tella-us]

I feel like answering this tonight.

Or at least one of each category.

But as two character. Mika (because she's sort of an oc?) and Damien (because he's my boy)

Wrath- Has their anger made them hurt someone before? Short answer, yes. Long one:

For Mika, that would be the time she absolutely BODIED Lisette. She's also pushed Suzu down before when they were in middle school. She's still embarrassed about that.

For Damien, Malix obviously plus that one pig faun that I'm convinced he was going to kill if his mom didn't pop up to kill him.

Pride- What are they the most proud of and are they desperate to get attention for it?

Mika holds a lot of pride in her family and while she actually tries to avoid the attention being the granddaughter of Harold gives her, she will fight you if you start talking shit. Yes, including about David.

Damien doesn't hold much pride of himself but he does use being the son of the Demon Lord to demand respect from those who try to disrespect him.

Gluttony- What can they not get enough of? What might keep them from getting more?

Mika is coffee. Girl is addicted. A total "Don't talk to me until I have my coffee" person. The things that might keep her from getting it are the boys. They are concerned with her coffee intake.

Damien is sleep. Demons don't sleep and he was not usually allowed to rest so being able to turn off his brain and his mind reading makes sleep a genuine pass time. Speaking of, as per usual, his mind reading is what prevents him from getting more. It's hard to sleep when you're hearing someone's thoughts.

Greed- What do they want most in the world? How far would they go to obtain it? How desperately do they cling to it?

Mika isn't a greedy person but he holds onto the words of others a lot. Arguably too much. She wants to believe that the people that call her friend and love actually care so she clings onto their compliments and words. Though that dark part of her brain makes he unwilling to fight to obtain those words as it tells her that they're all lying.

What Damien wants most in the world is Mika. (or Twila on other routes) He never needed to "obtain" Mika, they just mutually fell in love however, he desperately clings to her to an unhealthy degree. He's willing to travel miles and hurt anyone to keep her safe. It's his moral compass and a lack of confidence that separates him from his far darker timeline of locking her and his brothers in the mansions to keep them "safe". Though with everything he's been through, his moral compass doesn't always work right.

Sloth- How do they act when they're tired? Are they a morning person?

Mika acts kinda grumpy when tired, a little quicker to sass. Also she's sort of a morning person? In the sense that she often wakes up early and either can't go back to sleep or feels too guilty about "wasting the day away".

Damien just acts slower when tired. He might take a while to process your words or have longer pauses before speaking. Though he also doesn't get tired easily seeing how much he sleeps and just his species. No he is not a morning person at all.

Envy- What do they want that someone else has? Would they go to extremes to get it?

Mika wants the peace that it seems others just have. She doesn't understand why she's so naturally unhappy. She also wants the family that others seem born with. She loves her parents but they weren't always there when she needed them. She wouldn't go to extremes for either of these wants. They're more passive wishes.

Damien wants to be human like the people around him. He sees them in an ideal light and things his life would be better if he could just get that. And extremes.... Does considering sleeping with Diana for it count as an extreme? He also envies the connections humans possess and in his darkest routes he is willing to, again, lock his family in the mansion or turn his brothers into spiritual orbs to have and keep these connections.

Lust- How would they react to sexual tension? Are they a top or bottom?

Mika reacts by either blushing up a storm or flirting back. It really depends on if she has a comeback or not. If the tension is particularly high, she's often willing to give in to whatever the night may hold. (which is usually pound town) Also she is like 70% a bottom.

Damien doesn't seem to blush much (that's more if he's caught really off guard, which is hard to do), he's more the accidental causer of sexual tension. Though when he does experience the lower end of it, he might smile. On the higher end though, he would have a hard time resisting that urge to feed, it would show in the specks of gold that would flash in his eyes. Also he is 70% a top.

[otdiaftg]

The Raven King - Chapter Seven

Day: Thursday, October 5th Time: 11:30 PM EST

"I mean literally soft. Too many curves, see? I feel like my hands would slide right off. It's totally not my thing. I like..." He drew a box with his fingers as he searched for words. "Erik. Erik's perfect. He's a total outdoors junkie, rock climbing and hiking and mountain biking, all that awful bug-infested fresh-air stuff. He's stronger than I am, and I like that. I feel like I could lean on him all day and he wouldn't break a sweat." "Funny," Nicky said. "That didn't used to be my type. None of the others I crushed on growing up were anything like that. Maybe that's why none of them could help me." Nicky turned his hands palm-up on the table and considered them. "My parents are kind of crazy, you know? There's religious and there's super psychotic religious. Me and Renee, we're the decent sort, I think. We go to different churches and have some different ideas, but we respect each other anyway. We understand that religion is just an interpretation of faith. But my parents are the black-and-white crazy kind. It's only right and wrong with them: hellfire and damnation and judgment from on high. "For some reason I tried coming out to them anyway," Nicky said. "Mom was pretty upset. She locked herself in the bedroom and cried and prayed for days. Dad took a more direct route and shipped me off to Christian gay camp. I spent a year learning that I was infected by a disgusting idea from the devil, that I was a living test for every other good Christian on the planet. They tried using God to shame me into being straight. "It didn't work," Nicky said. "For a while I wished it did. I went home feeling like an abomination and a failure. I couldn't face my parents like that, so I lied. I pretended to be straight for the rest of high school. I even dated a couple girls. I kissed a couple of them, but I used my faith as an excuse never to get further than first base. I knew I just had to keep it together until graduation. "I hated my life so much," Nicky said. "I couldn't do that, you know? I couldn't live a lie like that day after day. I felt trapped. Some days I thought God abandoned me; sometimes I thought I failed Him. Halfway through my junior year I started thinking about suicide. Then my German teacher took me aside and told me about a study abroad program. She would set it all up for me, she said, if my parents would sign off on it. She'd handle admissions and get a host family and everything. It'd be expensive, but she thought I needed a change in scenery. Guess she knew I was that close to the edge. "I didn't think Mom and Dad would go for it, but they were so proud of me for my so-called recovery they agreed to let me go my senior year. I just had to last another semester and then I could go. I was so desperate to get out of there I didn't even really pay attention when Aaron and Aunt Tilda moved to Columbia that spring. All I cared about was keeping it together until May. I know now I should have tried harder, but I would've been no good to him how I was. "When the plane took off from Columbia, I was scared to death," Nicky said. "I was so relieved to leave my parents and everyone I knew, but I didn't know if being in Germany would change anything. When I landed, my new host brother was waiting for me in Arrivals. Erik Klose," Nicky said, sounding it out like he was saying it for the first time. "He taught me to believe in myself. He showed me how to balance my faith and my sexuality, and he made me okay again. I know it sounds dramatic, but he saved my life." Nicky flipped his hands over and laced his fingers together. The look he turned on Neil was as reassuring as it was worried and made Neil want to edge away. "That's what love is about, see? That's why Exy isn't ever going to be enough, not for you or Andrew or anyone. It can't hold you up, and it won't make you a stronger or better person."

Art used with permission by Kurra. Thank you @kurra !

[saecoyle]

spoilers warnings // opinion abt the first part

what I like :

Penelope being an absolute sweetheart and terribly socially akward but not being turned ridiculed, like a lot of "not-like-other-girls" fiction. Penelope is different than the ton as she's not sticking out but she makes it clear that she is a very common girl in her wants and desire, that she is just more introverted and has had less help from her family.

Her relationship with her mom getting deeper as well as their conflict. Love that!

Francesca being a really agreable character and her silent affection towards John is adorable. Definitly looking for more of them in the second part.

I actually enjoy the subplot of both Eloïse and Cressida, the season is really centering on the cracks of the ton's idea of normalcy before going further than the Londonian society in others books which is a great thing. It adresses that in an universe like Bridgerton there's a difficulty for the young misses in market to bond and form friendship because they're in constant competition, but also it doesn't take away the flaws of each-characters, making them whole. The three girls does not only compete with themselves but they also envy each one thing for each-other and are blind to the other person's issue, but at the end of the day the ton ends up being an issue for all of them in one way or another.

Violette and Agatha's brother, very cute, love their different views on marriage and their equal love for their children.

Colin is actually not a non-playable-character! Still feels a lil bit uncomplete to me but hey, it's only four episodes, it might come as well. I do really empathize with him with his awkwardness in episode three and four and hope for more as for later. Also they need to get him a more fluffy wig in the sense that : episode 3 with the wind, thank you.

what I disliked :

The constant threesomes (okay, only two) but I don't like lesbianism being used as porn content for men, even though if it means what it means (Colin is not content with one sexual or romantic partner if it's not Pen ect ect…) as a lesbian it is still icky to me. (Also I know that the few mlm scenes we've had caters to 'everyone' because straight women tends to love gay men but they're also more deeper than sex workers having to shag in front of rich nobles.)

The part 2 teaser, in genereal the fact that L.W will be revealed in this season and that the main conflict will be Penelope lying to Colin. But it's mostly because I've read the books and I hold Penelope and her work's dear in my heart I have issues about how it was handled. Personal preferences I guess.

Benedict's plot, not interesting, love the actress (very pretty) but in general I feel like theyre running in circles with him to keep the hype until they've made all their seasons and then his. Just not interested in it.

THAT half moment in the carriage scene where Pen tries to put her hands in his hair but it feels very weird bc in the book I felt it as unconcious and passionate and his hair being so stiff + the weird look turned me off so bad…sorry I know a lot of people like that scene in its entirety but it's the only part I had issues with.

I'm sad that we don't get news on Queen Charlotte's family situation bc it really intrigued me, I'm not surprised that the universe feels kind of flat.

things I am neutral about :

Kanthony not being that present, well it's not their seasons! I always have issues with ennemies turned lovers in the sense that they become boring very fast if theyre straight ((sorry)) and I do like them so I'm glad I didn't have the time to get bored by them, it also means more Francesca plot, more Creloise so I am truly fine with it.

The Mondrich getting nobles traits, I just wished it focused on the son too. Maybe about how pressured he would be as a young guy, ect, but there's still time.

Oh and it took me a MOMENT to understand the logistic of him f*ngering her, at first I thought he was just pleasing her outside and I was like "but the logistic? does he just gets out of the carriage with wet fingers and goes tell his mom he's getting married?" But it seems that yes. So… Okay.

The pregnancy race, idk it just feels obvious that Pen at the end of the day might win bc one will have a girl or one will be too late ect… I do find the commentaries about sexuality funny, and if it means more Finch and Philippa I'm fine with it.

general opinion for now :

I have been warmed up to be hyped by the season for a while now so there is not a real surprise that i'm appreciating the main romance as they're the only one I read the book and had seen across fandom in laws. Now the four next episode can make it more than great or sadly make my appreciation downgrade, it'll be a different experience that I've had with the other seasons bc I binged all of it and only had a overall opinion on the entirety of the show. Looking for the rest!

[my-castles-crumbling]

um so i came out to my mom two years ago and my dad last year no particular reason for the difference just happened like that and anyways they're supportive and all we talk about the girls i like over dinner or otherwise they still think i should focus on my education and think about my sexuality after i get into a good college or whatever but that isn't really from a place of homophobia. here's the thing though they're always like "keep an open mind bc you might not be gay" bc they think that the primary reason i like girls is because i go to an all girls school and have probably interacted with maybe fifteen boys outside my family in the fourteen years of my life and i mean they say they'll support me no matter what and i know that but at the same time i wish they didn't tell me to keep an open mind and shit bc my other friends who had interacted with less guys irl but a few online knew they liked guys even though they were in a girls school but my parents think most of the people from my school who say they like girls say it because we go to an all girls school but that's not the thing i've never really felt much attraction to guys maybe once when i was nine but never since then and if i think about a future with a guy all that comes to mind is one of those pictures you find on google of a stereotypical straight white couple doing shit together and i'm not even white so 😭 and i can't really ever picture myself kissing a guy fictional celebrity or real like i always use someone else as a placeholder but i can imagine vivid makeout scenes with girls so yeah i know with certainty that i like girls and not guys and my parents being kinda dismissive of it kinda hurts.

Hi!

That's so frustrating :( I feel like non-queer people say that type of shit a lot and don't understand why it's so upsetting. I definitely understand why you feel the way you do, and I'm so sorry <3

Have you tried to flip it back on them? Either saying, "Would you tell me to keep an open mind about being gay if I was straight?" or even (though this is a bit more sassy, probs not as good of an idea) "Oh, you guys should keep open minds too! Maybe you're actually gay!"

Naming you fearless anon

[sweetandsavageautistic]

(CW: Cringe, puzzle pieces, Autism Moms, potential sensory eyesore, ableism possibly, like one sex joke)

Welcome back to me harshly criticizing graphic design choices that people make about autism where I find pictures of shirts and whatnot and I tear into them like a lion tearing into its prey. Let's get into it.

In the words of @rebmasel on TikTok: "Ka-chow."

First up the only appropriate way to do this review is in the style of Dr. Seuss.

I do not like the puzzle piece, for it disturbs my fucking peace.

The color purple is real nice, but the message here I would think twice.

No tacky colors, so that's good. I don't hate it, though I feel I should.

Final Score: 4 out of 10. I'd rather not see this again.

I know the first line's kinda cheating, but I couldn't really think of any other fitting rhyme.

Next up is this:

This is already miles better than most of what I've seen.

The colors aren't tacky, they're actually kinda nice.

You have two wolves inside of you, both of them are gay and autistic. /ref

Autism Acceptance, that's a win.

Infinity symbol instead of puzzle piece, fuck yes.

Only criticism is that it's kind of a cheesy message, but not the worst.

Final Score: 9.5 out of 10. I'd wear it.

And then the quality drops here.

Puzzle piece means you lost points.

"Autism Mom." You can say it's difficult to raise an autistic child, but you're not a goddamn superhero.

How dare you use Rosie the Riveter for this. The disrespect. /hj

The military font is tacky.

I don't like seeing blue associated with autism, but at least it's not an abominable shade of blue.

Final Score: 1 out of 10. Get it out of my sight.

Speaking of lions that I mentioned earlier:

I'm already liking the absence of puzzle pieces.

Autism Acceptance is a yes.

When a lioness has children, she stops making love to the lion. The lion gets jealous, sometimes so jealous he EATS the children. You'd think this would upset the lioness; far from it. They make love again like the children never existed. I find that idea terrifying. /q

Not a fan of the colors, they're too dark for my taste.

The message feels cheesy.

Final Score: 7.5 out of 10. I dunno if I'd wear it, but it's not the worst design I've seen. The effort and care are present.

This feels like a roller coaster because it went downhill again.

"Share your friends." As someone with PDA, to quote Hamlet, Act 3, Scene 3, Line 87; "No." /hj

Autism Awareness. Once again, I am very aware of my existence but sometimes I wish I wasn't; there are days where I'd like to be both perceived and NOT perceived.

The blue isn't tacky, thank God.

I hate the quote because it gives the message that autism is nothing but a burden.

Also there's a bit too much going on with it, all of the decals and shit.

I don't see any puzzle pieces, so thank God.

Final Score: 2 out of 10. I do not recommend.

This is a bit different.

There's just way too much going on in this. Absolute eyesore.

Return of the Tacky Elementary School Colors, except they dragged orange into it this time.

So many puzzle pieces.

Why is everyone trying to fight autism? It's just minding its business.

I'm pretty sure that that's going to be a signal to mean kids to bully your kid. Like, even if there's more understanding of autism, there are still asshole crotch goblins.

I haven't "done" autism, but I am curious as to whether or not autism is good in bed. /j

Final Score: 1 out of 10. No thanks, I'll pass.

Let's end part 2 on a high note.

Simple design, but colorful and pretty easy on the eyes.

And the colors aren't patronizing.

No puzzle pieces.

Acknowledgement of the intersectionality of autism and sexuality.

No cheesy message; just a funky design about autism and gayness. Not all autism shirts have to be serious or UwU or motivating, so it's always a nice change of pace.

Final Score: 11 out of 10. As an asexual biromantic autistic, I'd wear this.

[radio-static13]

i am someone who only knows how to love unconditionally. once i love someone, i can't ever stop. i don't know how, and i wish i did because, more often than not, it has grievous repercussions. i have bpd, im an all or nothing kind of person. the only exception to this ever has been my ex, who was an emotionally and sexually abusive piece of shit. i feel nothing for him now but disdain. and though lately i've been reminded a lot of those years i spent letting him happen to me, and even though i'm completely outraged at the person who's caused all this...i can't understand why i can't hate him. i hate what he did, i hate that he turned out to be just as bad or even worse than my own abuser, i hate all the disastrous consequences of his actions, i hate that it was him of all people. and yet. i don't know how to hate him. i desperately want to. but just like i will never hate my father in spite of the horrible things he did in life, i can't hate him either. i don't know how. it doesn't mean i forgive or condone any of his terrible actions, but. he helped me survive at a time in my life when i felt like ending it. he picked up a lonely, broken child and called him a brave hero. the first book i read was the graveyard book, and i really saw myself in it. and then even more so in the ocean at the end of the lane. next was good omens...

i know you're supposed to separate the art from the artist, but as an artist and a writer myself, how can i? that art is built out of bits and pieces you tear out of your own soul, out of memories and places and people and experiences in your life, stories you craft and weave with your own arteries. yes, writers are liars, but all the best lies are based on truths. to quote the man himself, "We writers – and especially writers for children, but all writers – have an obligation to our readers: it’s the obligation to write true things, especially important when we are creating tales of people who do not exist in places that never were – to understand that truth is not in what happens but what it tells us about who we are. Fiction is the lie that tells the truth, after all."

it can't all have been bullshit...

my dad used to be incredibly abusive to my mom. i grew up watching them fight and seeing him belittle her. he also loved her very much. they would spend great times together, talk for hours, bring the groceries while she cooked, give her the best gifts. he was also abusive to his kids. he also did everything in his power to give us a great life, a big house, the best education, and all the commodities he could afford, and spend quality time together. he really cared for his family. he used to be incredibly queerphobic. he was also the one who took me to my first appointment with the endocrinologist, and was there when i got my first T shot. he called me his son before my mom did. i resent a great deal of things, but i will never hate my dad. i miss him terribly. he didn't deserve to die.

and i miss neil. and sure, maybe i was just in love with an ideal, just the beautiful persona he wanted to be known as. and it's sickening to think that the hands that cradled and soothed my fears were tainted with the blood of innocents. but they held me, didn't they? and the voice that told me i was brave for being unapologetic and speaking my mind is the same one that made so many people afraid to speak up. but i'm here because i chose to follow him. i chose to listen to his gilded words, and i still believe in them - i'd be in a graveyard otherwise. though had he been a siren, i'd be dead. had i been at the wrong place at the wrong time, i might've been on the list of all those who regret ever meeting him.

and yet, i can't hate him. i've loved him for too long, and it's nauseating, but i can't lie to myself. i still do. and i hate it. i hate that i can't hate him. it's been the easiest thing to do for most, but it seems impossible for me. i only hate myself for it.

i love him.

i'll never forgive him.

and this is all the more reason why i want him to pay for the consequences of all the hurt he has caused. i hope it's hurting him just as much. and - maybe this is just wishful thinking from a foolish dreamer, but - i hope he learns.

[k-s-morgan]

Hi, I hope you are safe and sound

I've been meaning to ask you a question about asexuality but was afraid it would be too personal. Your recent post is about, so I guess it's ok to ask, but if not, feel free to skip

I'm still young enough, going through my university years, but I've never felt attraction towards anyone. Even as a teenager at school. (Now, I'm not even sure if I can love anyone as a partner) Though I like reading romantic stories and do understand when a person is 'attractive' or not. So, the question is how/when did you understand that you are asexual and do you have any tips perhaps? It's just so upsetting for me to feel pressure from not only society but also my parents who expect me to find a lover and have a family

Hello! Oh, please don't worry, I don't mind any kind of personal questions as long as they are not deliberately offensive!

Asexuality means a lack of sexual attraction to anyone, but there is such thing as aesthetic attraction, meaning that you find some people aesthetically pleasing, very beautiful, etc. From what you said, you might be referring to it. Asexuals are perfectly capable of evaluating the general attractiveness of a person and they might even have their preferred ideal of beauty.

In my case: for a long time, I was confused because I felt aesthetic attraction., and like, I adored reading and writing and watching romance stories. It's my favorite genre. All of this made me think that I’m bisexual, and I identified as such. But even when I admired a person’s beauty, it was more like admiring a painting. I felt no desire to do anything sexual with them (or anything romantic). When I saw a great character, I wanted to ship them with someone instead of seeing myself with them.

When I read about asexuality, something finally clicked, and I was thrilled with understanding who I am. I never doubted it since I found my label around 23, and I knew at that point that I’m just not attracted to people, neither romantically nor sexually. If you live that long and you never experience what other people do, to me, it's a clear indication that you're different in some way. I was excited to find the source of this difference.

The most important thing is what and how you feel. You can find a definition that describes you best and makes you feel comfortable; you can change your mind later. Many people dislike labels in general; I felt pleased when I found one, but we all have different experiences. Just try not to push yourself into something you don’t want or don’t like. Even if others don’t respect your sexuality/preferences, respect them yourself and I think (and hope) that you’ll be happy.  

I understand about feeling pressure, and I'm sorry. I wish I knew what to say here. My immediate family is very supportive, but everyone else is often annoying. I’ve never dated anyone, I never felt romantic or sexual interest to anyone; I had my first kiss + sex out of curiosity when I was 22, and it didn’t change anything in me - it was just a weird, very mechanical activity. But my friends and most of my relatives still say stuff like, “Oh, honey, you just haven’t met the right person yet! Have you tried therapy? I hope this year, you’ll find the love of your life! Would you like me to set you up with my friend?” My Mom tried to explain to her co-workers why I don’t plan on getting married, and they all refuse to accept that asexuality exists. They think I must be hiding some trauma. This is extremely offensive and infuriating. 

Sexuality is a part of who you are. I try to make people around me understand it, but they just blink at me in confusion. I ask heterosexual folks, “Why are you so sure you are straight? Maybe you just haven’t find the right man/woman.” When my aunt wished me to find a partner for the 100th time, I waited for her birthday and wished her to become a surgeon (she never had any relation or interest in medicine). She seemed to understand something, but a few months later, we were back to where we started. Still, maybe something like this could help you?

I'm comfortable and happy with myself, so while other people are a source of occasional frustration, their opinions don't really affect me.

I don't know how aggravating your situation is or might get, so the only thing I can say is that I hope you remember that your happiness with yourself matters most. You might figure out what label fits you best, you might start/keep changing them - as long as you’re comfortable with who you are, it’s all fine!