#i wish i were an academic in a tv show

[riverstories7]

Can I rant for a minute? Authors, if one of your characters is an academic, do some basic research. Your adjunct professor will not suddenly get tenure if they publish their magnum opus. Your associate professor probably already has tenure and isn't at risk of being fired unless they commit misconduct—in which case their rank doesn't really matter. Job titles vary from country to country: professor means something very different in the US and the UK. I've been thrown WAY out of immersion in at least two books this year by stupid errors that might have been fixed if ANYONE involved in the writing or editing had done a Google search or talked to an academic.

[sarahreesbrennan]

Quick Evil Note

To all my wicked darlings, I have now received rather a lot of messages asking me about the influences of Long Live Evil. And I wish to get messages about LLE and truly appreciate the ones I do get! And I wish to answer them. But answers about influences are tricky.

The book has been out in the US for a little over two weeks, and it’s going so well so far, I couldn’t be more delighted and appreciative about its reception.

But also I’ve been informed (not asked) that two of my characters are obviously somehow both Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy of Harry Potter, and Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji of Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation. (Very puzzling as I don’t think these pairings - and one isn’t a pair - have much in common with each other or with mine. Vague hostility against a vaguely academic backdrop for a bit? For the record… in the book everyone is an adult and I don’t even have any academic backdrops to be vaguely hostile in front of…) This hasn’t happened to me in a long time, because I haven’t had an original novel out in a long time due to illness, and it is upsetting to always be discussed differently than writers who didn’t openly link their real names to their fan identity.

I have very different feelings and new appreciation for fandom than I once had. It’s been amazing to see and meet people who have stuck with me for decades. People are generally way more open and affectionate to and within fandom than they once were. Love matters to me a good deal more than hate. But getting death threats in your early 20s for excitedly telling your Internet friends you were going to publish a book does mark the psyche, and so does having your characters dismissed as other people’s characters.

And we can say there is nothing wrong with fanfiction or writing fanfiction and there isn’t! Fanfiction is great and can be genius. Terry Pratchett wrote Jane Austen fanfiction, and didn’t (and shouldn’t) have people saying Captain Wentworth = Captain Vimes. Still, when a TV show is discussed as ‘like fanfiction’ or when Diana Gabaldon said she didn’t like fanfiction and many said ‘YOU write fanfiction’ it isn’t intended in any kind spirit, even when it’s fannish folk saying it. And it’s just generally odd to have everyone call your apple a tomato, and has had professional consequences for me in the past.

However! All the asks I’ve received have been very kind, and I do want to answer them. I do want to talk about my influences because they are manifold and because I actually think it’s important to always talk about influences. I don’t believe stories exist in isolation - we tell tales in a rich tradition, and also a story doesn’t come alive to me all the way until it’s heard or read.

Long Live Evil is a love letter to fandom: it’s chock full of references to many many stories I’ve loved, to fairytales, myths and legend and Internet memes and epic fantasy and meta. My acknowledgements are endless partly for this reason. I do owe a great debt to many portal fantasies and archetypes and musicals and jokes about genre and plays through the ages, though I do think of my characters as themselves and nobody else.

I was frankly tempted to go ‘Yes I stole EVERYTHING! Bwhahaha!’ But while I am thoroughly enjoying and finding great freedom in my villain era, I do want to talk sincerely to you all as well, especially when asked sincerely interested questions.

But I’m a little scared to do so and have people say ‘AHA! Now we know what it’s fanfiction of’ (it’s happened before) or ignore me and go ‘we know the truth!’ (it’s happened before) and to feel like I’ve injured my book. Long Live Evil means more to me than any other and I really want to get talking about it right, and make sure it has the best reception I can give it.

So. Questions on all Evil topics very very welcome but answers to influence questions may come slowly. Bear with me. I am working on this!

[active-mind-15]

Maybe this is wishful thinking instead of a headcanon, but post-Extra Game when the Teiko gang has had more time to catch up with each other and talk about the past, I want them all to realize that they were severely fucked over by Teiko and their unforgiving principles of victory and that maybe they could all band together and start publicly putting Teiko on blast for their shitty conduct and how their greed caused them to ignore the physical and mental wellbeing of their players.

Cuz the Generation of Miracles was getting hella interviews in the series both in middle and high school. Surely some of these journalists would ask them about the old days at Teiko, right? That would be a perfect opportunity for them to start getting their side of the story out about what really went down in Teiko. And from there, it would be a trickle-down effect and more and more and more sports magazines would start reporting on Teiko and how it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. Maybe it could snowball into TV/video interviews of them talking about their experiences at Teiko and now suddenly everybody knows about that one school that's messing up their prodigies.

What if that led to other middle-schoolers currently attending Teiko (maybe even the OG Teiko gang's direct underclassmen who knew and played with them) coming forward with their own stories after being emboldened by the exposes coming out, and they're all confirming the harsh training regiments they're put through and the enormous pressure placed on them. I would think that the landscape of Teiko after the OG Teiko gang graduated would be a MESS because the best players Teiko has ever had are now in high school, so their school was probably scrambling to find the "next Generation of Miracles". They'd hyper-focus on any kid showing even a sliver of potential and then train them to the ground in the hopes that these students would turn out to be as good as or even better than the OG Teiko gang. But this obsession means that this new generation of the Teiko basketball team is severely overworked and at their limit on all levels. Nobody is having fun on the court anymore. It's about nothing but winning. The dropout rates in the basketball club are higher than any other club in the school and it only increased after the OG Teiko gang left.

Or what if it's not just the basketball team having a hard time? What if people from other sports clubs and academic disciplines start coming forward, and suddenly people realize that the unrealistic and harmful expectations weren't just placed on the basketball team, but on EVERY STUDENT WHO ATTENDED TEIKO. And now all of them are sick of having to keep quiet and suck it up and they want to make Teiko pay for making them so miserable.

Eventually, Teiko's reputation starts doing a 180 now that all these students are coming forward. The OG Teiko gang is pretty much leading the resistance while offering support to each and every student who shares their story. Maybe they all come together to start a petition for better treatment for the students at Teiko, less pressure to succeed, better mental health and counseling resources, and maybe even completely changing the school slogan of "ever-victorious". Imagine if they end up getting a ton of signatures and support from people and then the school is put between a rock and a hard place because they're getting bad publicity, sponsors are becoming skeptical, and parents are constantly calling to demand that they explain themselves. Imagine if Coach Sanada is still there and due to the guilt he felt of failing the OG Teiko gang the first time he ended up publicly revealing how he was pushed by the principal to keep the GoM as starters in every game they played so their victories would bring prestige to the school. Imagine if he did that and then immediately resigned from Teiko. And as the pressure gets put on the principal, he cracks under the weight of it all and resigns, too. And the OG Teiko gang witnesses all of this go down in real-time, and they don't necessarily celebrate, but they do wish the best for all the students who are still at Teiko and are navigating this confusing time, but they also hope that finally, their actions would bring about the change needed so that nobody at Teiko has to go through something like this again.

Idk, there's a saying that a child not embraced by the village will burn it down just to feel its warmth, so bottom line is Teiko should have never pushed the Teiko gang to the edge because I could very well see them doing something like this to get justice for themselves and all their underclassmen.

[emeraldspiral]

So from what I understand, the initial pitch for Invader Zim was that the main source of comedy was Zim thinking posing as an elementary school student was the best use of his time as a spy and making leaps of logic based on his lack of cultural knowledge. And we did certainly see stuff like that happen in the show, but I think over time there was a shift to more episodes focusing on the Zim/Dib rivalry or things going on in space that didn’t feature the skool setting at all or didn’t revolve around cultural misunderstandings to drive the plot. IDK if they did more of that in the comics, but here’s some ideas I feel were missed opportunities. Not including anything obvious like “skool dance” episode, or “forced to work with Dib on a project”.

1 - An episode that’s just Zim and Dib narrating short stories they wrote for a creative writing assignment. It might be low-hanging fruit for them to both write the same story of a real incident between them from either of their perspectives, or a self-insert wish-fulfillment fantasy about defeating one another. I kinda like the idea of Dib writing the kind of story he himself would enjoy, like a noir-style detective story with a supernatural twist or gothic horror ghost story. Zim would just copy a story told to him by GIR, which itself is a mangled retelling of something that happened on TV that neither of them actually understand, but no matter how ridiculous and nonsensical the plot was he’d read it like it was Shakespeare.

2 - Similarly, an episode that’s just Zim giving an oral presentation on a historical figure or event, but he gets a ton of stuff wrong due to misinterpretation, or mixing up factual sources with like, a historical fantasy. Like if he read TF2 lore and told the class that stairs were invented by Abraham Lincoln.

3 - Zim gets an exam/report card back and finds out he’s performing poorly, which makes him question whether he’s learned anything at all from all the time he’s spent gathering intel. He decides to put his plans for conquest on hold to spend more time studying, except he’s not studying anything actually assigned by the skool and nothing he learns is on his next test or useful for conquering the humans.

4 - Alternatively, Zim is warned that because of all his absences and poor performance he’s at risk of being expelled. Dib mocks him for it at the first, but then decides he’d rather not have to worry about what Zim’s getting up to all day while he’s stuck in class, so he decides to help Zim break into the server room for the skool’s computer system so they can change his report card, but because this is Zimworld the security system is ridiculously over-the-top and the stakes are a like a Die Hard movie.

5 - The skool needs a team to represent for an academic decathlon. Zim signs up because he wants to show off his superior intellect and Dib joins the team to keep an eye on him (and prove his superior intellect). Zim and Dib are the math and science experts while their other teammates specialize in different subjects but everyone except Zim at least knows enough about the other subjects to mostly get the answers right if they’re forced to answer something outside their specialty. Unfortunately all the questions Zim and Dib know the answers to go to their less science-minded teammates and they get stuck with all the insane questions about skinning moose and other lectures from Ms. Bitters that they didn’t pay attention to.

Either that, or they keep getting quizzed about pop culture trivia they don’t know because they don’t keep up with mainstream television. Zim ends up getting a question right that wins the game however because he remembered it from some insufferable show GIR watches constantly and everyone treats him like a fucking genius for it. Dib meanwhile is treated like an idiot for getting all the stupid pop-culture questions wrong.

6 - The class has to read some classic lit out loud and Zim’s over-the-top dramatic narration leads to him being asked to audition for the skool play. Zim scores the lead role and gets way too into method acting. To the point where Dib can’t even tell if he legitimately thinks he’s the character or if he’s just doing it to mess with him.

7 - Zim joins a skool club and quickly usurps the club’s leadership and rules over the other members with an iron fist, twisting it from its original purpose into just being a club dedicated to serving his whims/messing with Dib. It all falls apart for some stupid reason like one member leaving and forcing the club to dissolve because it didn’t have enough members or some forms not being filled out correctly or budget issues forcing a bunch of clubs to shut down. Meanwhile, Dib tries to start a paranormal club but can’t get any members and gets kicked out of every other club he joins for trying to steer it away from whatever its original purpose was to make it about the paranormal.

8 - Baseball/team sports episode. Zim and Dib are both actually pretty decent so their team begrudgingly puts up with them. They let their rivalry get in the way at first and don’t pay any attention to the skool’s rival team talking trash about their skool. Even when it turns into an 80s cliche where the skool will actually be closed if they don’t win the game they don’t care because it is a shit skool and if it closes they’ll just go somewhere else. It’s only when one of the rival team members interrupts Zim and Dib in the middle of their own little pissing contest that they finally get their act together and start strategizing with the rest of their team. They win and finally get a taste of what it’s like to be appreciated momentarily for carrying the team until everyone else finds out their shitty skool is staying open because of them.

9 - Some Yu-Gi-Oh/Magic-type card game becomes really popular and Zim decides to get into it to blend in and find a way to exploit it to gain power over the humans. Dib naturally gets in on it too and they get way too serious about it. It either becomes an over-the-top parody of Yu-Gi-Oh and its hyper-realistic holograms and battle arenas that turn card games into genuine life-threatening experiences for participants and audiences alike, or it satirizes the satanic panic by having some kind of reveal that all the cards are actually possessed by real supernatural spirits and the games are part of some nefarious third party antagonist’s plot to overrun the world with demons or something.

[whoiskt]

I didn't do my end of the year questions last year and it messed up the year for me so HERE YA GO:

1. What did you do in 2024 that you’d never done before?

Man, I don't know really? I feel like I used to have so many each year and now I'm struggling to think of any. I went to LA for the first time?

2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I don't know what my resolution was but I'm pretty sure I didn't do it.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

No.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No, but basically yes. That's me being a touch dramatic but like, it really does feel like a certain someone died.

5. What countries did you visit?

None.

6. What would you like to have in 2025 that you lacked in 2024?

Clear skin.

7. What dates from 2024 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

None, shit memory, nothing crazy happened this year.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Surviving. It was a bit of a rough one.

9. What was your biggest failure?

I would have liked to achieve more and be more confident in myself by now. It's mostly many small failures in that way. Like, I'm still mad at myself for not presenting my finals well. I did fine in class overall but it was a bit of a bummer at the end there.

Also like, my financials in general are very not great.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Not really, which is good. I had the flu which was scary for a hot second because I had a 104° fever that wouldn't break, and I ain't got no health insurance so I was worried I was going to be forced to go to the doctor and pay out of pocket, which lead to me having a panic attack while already fevering. But I was fine in the end.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

I barely bought anything this year that wasn't rent, credit card payments, or tuition. Or Celsius.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

God, I don't know. Let me know. I would like to know.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled?

Not naming names....... but rest assured there was appalling behavior.

14. Where did most of your money go?

See #11, lol.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

School. But I won't make that mistake again. I think school is bad for me mental healths. But we stay silly.

16. What song will always remind you of 2024?

The entire Arcane soundtrack.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: (a) happier or sadder? (b) thinner or fatter? (c) richer or poorer?

SADDER FATTER POORER

the holy trifecta 😎👍

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Make money.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Doubt and despair.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

Went back home. My second oldest sister was with her in-laws on Christmas Day, so we shifted our Christmas to the 26th. So, on the actual day of, I was just kind of chilling with my folks, we had lasagna, watched The Holiday, and played some games.

21. Did you fall in love in 2024?

Oh yeah, always falling in love babey.

22. What was your favorite TV program?

Arcane, Blue Eye Samurai, Dungeon Meshi, What We Do in the Shadows, Law and Order: SVU were my lifeblood. Also rewatched Danny Phantom. Started a lot of good shows I'm yet to finish--literally took a TV history class and I have a huge To Watch list.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

(weary sigh) No, I'm not cut out to hate people.

24. What was the best book you read?

Honestly, most of my reading was academic this year so I didn't finish many books. But House of Leaves was pretty wild and fun. That is one of maybe 3 books I finished this year ahahahaha.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

I didn't "discover" Will Wood this year but I finally gave in and listened to more of his discography, discovered many bangers, which is how he ended up as my #2 on Spotify Wrapped.

26. What did you want and get?

Feedback on my art. Got to go home during summer which was nice too.

27. What did you want and not get?

Better. Wait, is that too general of an answer?

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

The Wild Robot.

29. What one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Not dying?

30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2024?

Whatever doesn't have holes in it (and some things that have less obvious holes too)

31. What kept you sane?

Friends.

32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Well, I support that guy who shot that insurance CEO... Don't know if I'd go as far as 'fancy' though.

33. What political issue stirred you the most?

God... I don't know. I feel like the world is a ton of bricks and we're getting pelted by it all the time. And it was fucking election year, and look how that turned out...... but I will try not to fall into despair.

34. Who did you miss?

I miss my bro-in-law :(

35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2024.

I learned something big and important but I can't remember how I articulated it. I've been having issues with self-worth, and often I fall back to old failures to make things worse, and I've learned that focusing too much on failure doesn't just prevent more failure, it prevents any movement at all including progress or success. So, I've been doing better with that.

So, I guess I've been learning to let things go more.

36. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

I had the perfect lyric for this but I can't remember what song it was anymore. It was like literally one random line in a song.... gr... this will bother me. If I think of it, I'll let everyone know and update it.

For now you can have this:

[raisinchallah]

that is actually something i find quite interesting is modern xena fandom i guess pretending everyone was super thrilled and loved every moment of xena and of course it was the 90s nobody could be openly gay on tv in that bygone dark age so nobody would ever criticize it when if u actually start digging there are plenty of opinion articles and academic analysis on how xena positions itself to commodify lesbian sexuality while also refusing to make any statement one way or the other and part of the larger lesbian chic era as well as people coming at it from a fan perspective of feeling jerked around and teased with no confirmation in some ways i think the disconnect comes in general from like well plenty of random gay people dont actually care about or find u crazy to read too much into fictional characters and take that as whatever u want to see it as u see this in discussions of star trek slash fiction but also i think our reframing of xena as only the positive responses (finale excluded) is also in many ways television has been remade in the image of xena so youth raised on shows built on mean spirited gay jokes or heavy handed bait narratives when u get back to the source and see xena which still feels fresh in many ways since genre tv has not actually still 30 years later created a show as long running that centers on a narrative as suffused with gay meaning as xena but now with no plausible deniability so the earlier arguments of well we want actual gay shows within the genre television space there still isnt really that so the fandom is now more specific to people who want xena not people who wish they were watching the L word... but i do think like understanding the variable responses to the show as it was airing is very interesting and important to remember.. i think another element that changes how things are received is that xena as an early internet fandom was kind of on the cutting edge of constantly logged in and engaged fans that people felt various interactions with creators and the response to various episodes in far stronger ways and that you know the winks and nudges at the hardcore shipping fanbase could feel exploitative and part of this new emerging internet fandom space something that also happened on other early net fandoms like buffy and the x files but now in this day and age where fandoms are used as active marketing tools and utilized for publicity this all comes off as quaint and polite in comparison thus the power of time to change many things

[the-peak-tmnt]

i wanted to thank you for your fanfic. as silly as it might sound, it helped me get through an anxiety attack the other day and i really wanted to thank you for writing something that helped me

when it was happening i could feel my chest getting all tight and it was really hard to get enough air, but i just thought of rapha doing his breathing exercises to calm himself down and it really helped me get through a rough moment there

thank you for being so cool <3

First, I just want to say I'm so sorry you had a difficult time the other day. I hope you're doing well, and that anxiety attacks aren't something you have to deal with on the regular. I'm so glad that thinking about how Raph handles his anxiety/panic attacks in my fic was helpful for you in that moment.

I don't think it's silly at all to find comfort & solidarity in a fanfiction when you're having a rough time. I said this elsewhere already, but I genuinely believe that fanfiction and other fan works are so invaluable because they offer us a space to explore complicated, difficult and sometimes even taboo subjects. Fanfiction has always been a way to read about things rarely dealt with (or handled poorly) in published fiction/tv shows/movies. I will always argue one of the greatest things about fanfiction and other fanworks is being able to see ourselves and our own struggles through our favorite fictional characters.

Years and years ago, most things related to mental health were rarely touched on in popular media, and fanfiction was the first place I ever saw such realistic depictions of things like anxiety. It was also the first place I encountered information about coping mechanisms (both healthy and unhealthy), mindfulness techniques, certain clinical terms, etc.

There were a couple pivotal events in my 20s that led me to seeking out more information about these sort of things beyond fanfiction. In fact, much of Reciprocity is based on one of these events and the things I learned afterward, but we'll get into that in the author's note for Chapter 16...

Anyway, my point is that for me, fanfiction was a starting point. It helped me realize there were things that I wanted to learn more about, and I found more academic/professional/clinical resources. I have no idea where you are on your own journey, so all I can do is offer a little piece of my own experience...and some fanfiction about turtles with big feelings 😉

Thanks for sharing this with me, and please know I'm wishing you all the best ❤️

[damagedintellect]

Trafalgar Law x reader

💌 Fake it till you make it: Chapter 8  💌  

Summary:  To avoid an arranged marriage set up by Doflamingo, Law needs to bring home a girlfriend during the Christmas break and you just so happen to be a theatre major in the same dorm at One Piece University. What could possibly go wrong?  

Tropes: College AU, Fake Dating, Idiots in love

💌 Word count: 4,634 💌 <= Previous Chapter | Next Chapter =>

Law has been missing for three days. Ever since the dinner with Doflamingo it's like the surgeon disappeared without a trace. You were worried and every time you tried to call or text him it went straight to voicemail or you were left on read. No one could get a hold of him, not even Bepo, Shachi or Penguin. You had to beg Sabo to unlock his dorm only to find all of his belongings were already gone. No note no nothing, the only thing left was his key on the desk. You felt like you were still asleep and were having a nightmare but you knew that you were awake. Since the second night of him being MIA you hadn't been getting much sleep. Not even hugging lil Law was helping. You just wish you had answers. You knew something was bothering him about dinner, about Doflamingo being there but you didn’t think Law would run away without warning. You thought you guys were past this but you guess not. Maybe he thinks this is something he has to do alone. When he comes back you were going to kick his ass for making everyone worry.

At first since it was the weekend you didn’t think much of it. You knew he liked having space but on Monday the Death Club actively went out of their way to corner you for answers. Answers you didn’t have. Some girlfriend you were. Of course they gave you an earful about it too. You tried contacting the hospital and they said he was on academic leave. There were only so many reasons he could be taking a leave of absence so you started to fear the worst.

It didn't help that no one could get a hold of him but after some thought it’s more likely that Law didn’t want any of you to find him at the moment. He's not the kind of person to be making stupid career moves. At least not in his last year. Still a leave of absence was pretty serious. This had to be Doflamingo's doing, you're sure of it. On your way back to the dorm you caught a glimpse of Sanji showing Pudding around. Apparently she managed to enroll this late in the game but in the end decided not to move into the dorms. A good choice because it would have been really awkward for you given your last confrontation with her. Yet the timing of everything was peculiar. The moment she shows up, Law disappears. You couldn’t help but feel jealous of Pudding as she hung out with Sanji the past few days. Which almost didn't make a lick of sense to you. Key word being almost maybe Sanji’s incessant flirting finally worked. They seem like they’ve gotten really close. Come to think of it this was probably how Pudding felt seeing you with Law. Maybe she's just lonely and wants a friend.

Your phone rang snapping you out of your thoughts. You were about to open the door to the dorms when you saw the caller ID. It was Corazon. Part of you was almost relieved but the other hand you had a bad feeling about this. At least maybe you could get some answers. You walked into the lounge area as you picked up the phone. It seemed everyone was huddled around the TV. You stood in the back corner to not disturb anyone.

"Hello?" You answered, Corazon had never called you before so it felt a little strange to talk to him especially in light of recent events. He did say you could call him if you needed anything, maybe you should have got in touch with him sooner.

"(Y/N)! Thank God I got a hold of you. I have been trying to get in touch with Law for hours. I don’t know what's gotten into him but I swear I'll get to the bottom of it I promise you. My bastard of a brother is behind it. I know it, Law wouldn’t do this willingly." Bepo noticed you first and he started tapping the others on the shoulder to let them know you had returned. The gesture made you quirk an eyebrow with how panicked and worried he was seeing you. You wondered what they were watching that had them all so captivated. You stepped closer to get a better view. "Wait Corazon what did Law do? Is he okay? He went missing three days ago and no one has heard from him since."

Corazon sounded like he was knocked sideways "You don't know?!" As he was about to explain what happened as you saw it in real time on the TV causing everyone to stare back at you. A picture of Trafalgar Law and a picture of Charlotte Pudding filled the screen with bells and a white banner framing the photos together.

"Law announced his engagement to Pudding."

You couldn’t stand anymore as the announcement flashed across the screen for the union of the Donquixote and Charlotte family heirs. The two major corporations are using this opportunity to boost business which was pretty controversial given the year but hey money is power. You slowly slumped to your knees. Out of everything that you imagined could be the reason for Law’s disappearance this wasn’t it. You stayed there wide eyed completely stunned by the news not having the strength to hold yourself up anymore.

"Law…is….engaged?"

This is what Pudding was talking about that night. This is what she had you agree to. She knew ahead of time that she would be engaged to Law, knowing that you were his girlfriend and she forced you to say yes. You saw Luffy start to make a fuss and everyone was rushing to see if you were okay since you were on the floor but it was all white noise to you.

You weren’t really there, how could you pay attention to them after receiving the news? All your focus was on Corazon as he explained that it was unusual for Law to come back to Dressrosa out of the blue but he didn't think the surgeon would leave without saying anything. He could tell something was wrong with him because of how devoid of emotion Law was. Law was blunt and spoke very direct most of the time but this was different. Corazon said there was no light in his eyes; it was like he was just going through the motions. Corazon had only found out this morning, it was the big headliner when he read the paper. Even he didn't know about the engagement until today. "I promise I'll fix this. Doflamingo's not the only one with power. I'll contact you again when I have more information."

"Thank you Corazon."

"Oh and one more thing. Law loves you. I'd bet my life on it but when this is all over don't let him off the hook so easily." With that he ended the call and the flood gates started to open. The tears streamed down your face, you were at a loss for words. It wasn’t that you were crying because it was gut wrenchingly painful, you were just overwhelmed. This is what you were trying to prevent in the first place and it sounds like you failed miserably. It wouldn't have been so bad if you didn't have feelings for him and visa versa. Moreover you were pissed off at Pudding. She knew the entire time. That’s why her behavior at the banquet rubbed you the wrong way.

After rationalizing the situation for a bit to get your bearings back you were able to relay the little information you received. That’s when Sanji welcomed Pudding into the common room like he had the past two days. Pudding gave you a grim wide smile, the same one Doflamingo wears so proudly and it all clicks into place. You couldn’t make this up, you genuinely think you are aware of what's going on. This is some cruel prank on you but what of Law’s involvement. It was the only piece missing as you rack your brain around this sick joke. The world spun around flashbacks from the past few weeks were overflowing through your mind as you were trying to connect more dots and before you knew it everything went dark.

—

Corazon was livid; he thought he raised Law better than this. He knew his brother was a terrible influence but he couldn’t part from him; he just didn’t have it in him to do so. He tried phoning Law one more time before he decided enough was enough he was going to find him and force him to clarify exactly what the fuck is going on and when he’s done with Law he was going to beat the shit out of Doflamingo. Oh yeah Corazon was pissed. Once again just like the times before the call went straight to voicemail. That’s it the blonde has had enough. He was about to go looking for Law when he heard the door open. Corazon didn’t even push in his chair as he furiously marched toward whoever walked in. With any luck it would be his brother so he could deck him in the face.

To his surprise when he rounded the corner he was met with Law’s almost broken stare. Law tried to briskly walk past him but the taller man gripped his shoulder. “And where do you think you’re going? I have been calling you for hours!” Law only shrugged in response. Corazon shoved the newspaper in his face. “What about (Y/N)? She said you disappeared without saying anything. I thought she was your girlfriend. What happened?”

Corazon looked fierce. Law had never seen the blonde this angry before. Not even that time that he attempted to kill him could compare to the expression he was making now. He must have really liked (Y/N). “It's all been a lie." Law said flat out. "I only paid her to be my girlfriend. Sorry to disappoint you.” It was technically the truth after all but after everything Corazon wasn't buying it.

“That’s bullshit and you know it, I know it, hell even Doffy knows it. We've all seen the way you look at her." Corazon grit his teeth knowing there was a good chance he might not get a straight answer. "What did he do!"

Law has half a mind to walk away without saying anything. He was an adult and he could fight his own battles but the way Corazon was scolding him made him feel like a kid again. The lack of sleep was also not helping and here Law thought he had more resolve. "I didn't have a choice!" Part of Law wanted to know what exactly Corazon would do and before he could stop himself he started absentmindedly divulging information. "He had Vergo run a background check on (Y/N). Her mom's admitted at our hospital and-"

"HE WHAT!" Corazon knew Doffy was not afraid to get his hands dirty for something he wanted but honestly this is weirdly a new low but also not that surprising. It was only strange due to Law’s involvement with (Y/N). Their family business was a complex mess as it was; he didn't need this on top of it all. Corazon's face became solemn "Stay put. I need to have a word with my brother."

—

You woke up on the couch an hour later. Chopper said you were fine and that you fainted because you were shocked about the news. Pudding was nowhere to be found having gone home for the day after you collapsed. If anyone asked her about the situation no one told you anything about it but you felt like they were holding out on you. You were still in disbelief about the whole thing and all you could do now was wait for Corazon to get back to you with whatever information he could scrap up. You remained on the couch waiting for the call. You lost track of time as you were staring at your phone. Although you started to notice you were never left alone and that someone was always with you on the couch and when they had to leave they would get someone else to take their place. It appeared that everyone was worried about you and were taking shifts to watch over you. Probably to make sure you didn’t pass out again or to make sure you didn’t do anything stupid. At the moment you were with Luffy, Sabo and Ace. Luffy and Ace were playing a game on the other sofa and Sabo was watching some news story about a rebellion when there was a breaking news story that overtook the channel's priority.

You felt light headed as you continued to watch the footage being displayed on the TV. You felt your stomach drop seeing Corazon’s picture flash across the screen. He'd been shot and was in critical condition. “No…” you spoke barely above a whisper before trailing off. This couldn’t be happening. He must have learned too much and Doflamingo saw him as a threat. You grit your teeth, this was all your fault there had to be something you could do. As they showed another shot of the outside of the hospital you abruptly stood up to quickly write the name down hastily gathering your things. You need to go to Dressrosa, now. You didn't care if you had to travel by bus or on foot you were going and that's final.

Everyone picked up on what was going through your head as they all gave a subtle nod to each other. Luffy stood in front of you as you prepared to leave. “You’re going to kick Mingo’s ass and get Torao back right? I’m coming with you!” Luffy was cracking his knuckles but Ace and Sabo put a hand on his shoulder “Oh no you don’t. Are you forgetting you can’t drive?” Sabo flashed his keys but Ace rolled his eyes “Aren’t you forgetting that your classes have mandatory attendance?" Sabo frowned but Ace continued the roast "Besides, it's a 5-6 hour drive to Dressrosa and you drive like a grandma. My bike could probably make it there within 2 or 3.” Luffy grumbled since he wanted to help too “But your bike can only fit two people, what am I supposed to do!”

Ace flicked his forehead “Stay put like a good little brother, it’s not your fight yet. Let’s go (Y/N)” you nodded as you followed Ace out. “Thank you for this, I owe you one.” Ace smile "Consider it a truce. Everyone in our dorm is like family to me and no one messes with my family and gets away with it. I'm sure you would have done the same.”

Normally people would sit behind the motorcyclist but you insisted on sitting in front of him. You were short enough to and you were terrified of him falling asleep. At least this way, in the event of it happening, you'd be able to steer and avoid crashing. At this point Ace falling asleep was the least of your worries as the man drove like a maniac. He wasn't kidding when he said he could make it there in half the time. You're glad you were sitting in front of him because otherwise you would have been gripping on to him for dear life and he would have had to pry you off of him. When you got off the bike your legs were still shaky until you got to the front desk and asked what room Corazon was in.

"Floor 3 room 305 but you'll need to fill out this form first" She handed you a clipboard and a pen "Currently only family members are allowed for visitation hours but regardless you'll have to fill out the form." You walked away to fill out the form glaring at the “relation to patient” section. You sighed “Ace, I think we came all this way for nothing.” When you turned around Ace had collapsed on the floor and the nurse that was watching the counter rushed to his aid. Which meant no one was watching the entrance. This was your chance! You’ll have to thank Ace’s narcolepsy later as you moved as quickly as you could without drawing attention to yourself. Once you were out of the line of sight you sprinted down the empty hall to the elevator.

Once you got to the third floor it wasn’t very hard to find the room since it was near the front of the floor. You peered into the room through the small window. The coast was clear. You ducked into the room. Corazon had a room all to himself and he looked stable for now. The vase near the bed was empty which hopefully meant that Law hadn’t come here yet. Although you guess you could have also asked the nurse if he'd already visited or you could have stayed in the lobby and waited for him to show up. You sat in the chair provided for visitors listening to Corazon’s steady heart rate while sending Ace a text explaining where you ran off too when he collapsed. You didn’t really think this plan through you felt bad making him wait up especially since there was no guarantee that Law would even show up but you had a hunch that he would. You know how much he loves Corazon and if you were feeling guilty then he was probably dying inside.

—

Law was pacing in his room. Corazon told him to stay put but he didn’t exactly tell him for how long. He threw himself on his bed. Why did he have to get so many people involved? The situation was aggravating because it all came back around to Law making every wrong decision. He couldn’t change the past but he could plan his next move but he needed to know what Corazon planned to do or did. It had been a few hours now and Law was starting to get worried. Doflamingo wouldn’t, right? The more he thought about it the more the blood drained from his face. He broke out into a cold sweat as he frantically turned his phone back on. He’s had it off for the past few days wanting everyone to leave him alone. Once it finally started up every notification came through causing his phone to vibrate uncontrollably until the alerts finally caught up with the present. He tried calling but after ringing a few times it went to voicemail. Then he tried his best to sift through all the missed calls and text messages but looking at the time stamp there were no new messages from Corazon.

That's when he noticed a strange notification that seemed to be from one of the news apps he had. He could have sworn he disabled all alerts from said application but this one somehow went through. His curiosity and boredom got the better of him and opened it. He nearly dropped his phone. This was all his fault. He grit his teeth, he'd never forgive Doflamingo for this.

It didn't take Law that long to rush to the hospital and he had no trouble with finding the room. What he didn't expect was to see (Y/N) fast asleep holding Corazon's hand. It made Law tense. He didn't think he'd have to confront her so soon. It's the reason he left for Dressrosa to begin with. Everything would be easier if she hated him and never wanted to see him again. Grabbing the chart he looked Corazon over he suffered severe blood loss. Although the shot itself wasn't fatal and the surgery went well the blonde slipped into a coma. There was no predicting when he'd wake up.

He knelt down to grab his other hand "I'm so sorry Cora-san." He gave it a light squeeze before standing back up. He glanced back at (Y/N) this would be goodbye. He brushed the hair out of her face and captured her lips one last time before pulling his hat down walking away like the coward he was.

You didn’t expect to fall asleep but you hadn’t been getting much sleep with everything going on the hum of the machines were relaxing. You stirred as he was about to open the door. "Mmm Law?" You were still not fully registering your surroundings but you jolted upright when you recognized his silhouette. "Law! Where have you been, everyone's worried sick."

Law hesitated for a moment staring at the handle. He knew seeing you would be a bad idea. Law had to force himself to keep going ignoring all of your advances. It pained him to do so, especially as you sounded more and more frazzled by the lack of response. He knew he was breaking your heart and he couldn't bear to see you rush to the elevator as the doors shut.

You on the other hand were not going to let him get away. You did not survive Ace's reckless driving just to come back empty handed. You were getting your answers damnit even if you fell down the stairs in the process. You sprinted down holding the rail for dear life as you missed a step or too. You were panting heavily by the time you made it down to the lobby. In the distance Law had just made it past the doors. With any luck Ace would be there to stop him.

—

"Yo Trafalgar, you caused quite the uproar at the dorms. Why'd ya leave?"

Law stopped but didn't turn around "This doesn't concern you Fire Fist-ya." Ace casually walked in front of him "Actually it does, ya see (Y/N)'s like a sister to me and I can't be letting scum like you break her heart twice." Law grit his teeth as he pushed past him and started to leave again. Law was counting his blessings that it was only Ace who had come. If Luffy had managed to do damage control and made it to Dressrosa, who knows what kind of chaos would have broken loose to drag the surgeon back.

"Law, wait!" You huffed out a breath. You had finally caught up to him "Just tell me why, what did Doflamingo do?" Your outburst fell on deaf ears as the surgeon kept walking. You were still panting trying to catch your breath. No matter how rational you were, you couldn't help but feel betrayed. It hurt knowing he didn't even try to acknowledge your existence but spoke to Ace. Even if Ace didn't get a straight answer either it hurt knowing Law didn’t even have the decency to look at you. All he had to do was say it was over, that it was all a game and that it meant nothing but instead there's still this false hope in the back of your mind. You would have rather had an ugly break up, something definitive that you can move on from.

Ace pulled you into a hug. You didn't realize you were crying until he started shushing you, petting your hair. It only made you feel worse. Everyone was willing to drop what they were doing to take care of you. You felt useless and numb but you also had this weird sense of deja vu and part of you knew that if you could get Law to talk you could figure out how to fix whatever mess this was. Or maybe that was blind optimism and you didn’t know when to quit.  You couldn't remember your time on the road during the drive back. It felt like you were teleported back to the dorms. The moment you walked in the conversation fell to a hush as you aimlessly went to your room. You needed to be alone while you sort out your thoughts because half of them contradicted the others and it was starting to unravel you from the seams.

Luffy watched you leave before he gave Ace a look but his brother just shook his head as he joined the rest of the crew on the couches "Not good at all, he refused to talk. I tried to corner him but he got away. Any luck here?"

Bepo spoke nervously "Law contacted us about the wedding. It's in two weeks so we don't have a lot of time." He paused gesturing to Penguin and Shachi "he asked us to be groomsmen, we're going to have a suit fitting in a few days and he even gave us Doflamingo's card information to plan a bachelor party." Penguin pulled out his phone "He also said, and I quote, "use as much of that bastard's money as possible" which was an interesting touch." Everyone took in the information and nodded. Sabo and Robin exchanged glances "If Doflamingo's paying he's probably going to keep tabs on who's going and there'll be no way to get them to talk but lucky for us we both know the owner of Newkama Land." Newkama Land was a popular strip club known for its inclusivity and burlesque styles of performances. It was a strip club so it wouldn't be suspicious to host a bachelor party there. Sabo crossed his arms he knew Ivankov would be delighted to help out but the surgeon was a wildcard. "Since (Y/N)'s a dancer, we could probably set something up to where Law can't run away and I'm sure Bon Clay would be willing to help her with a routine but that’s only if she wants to do it.”

“Don’t you think they’re past the point of talking it out if he refuses to talk to her already?” Usopp questioned but Ace shook his head “Nah you should have seen him. If (Y/N) does perform at Newkama Land I doubt he’d be able to hold back.”

Sabo sighed “We still don’t know what kind of strings Doflamingo’s pulled to cause this either. I can’t see Law being an easy person to blackmail seeing as how private he is. Without information there’s only so much help we can provide from the sidelines so what else do we got?”

Nami spoke up this time "Sanji’s still working on Pudding. If anything he knows the Vinesmokes will be invited to the wedding but it won't be enough for all of us to go. Worst case it'll just be Sanji and Luffy but best case is me, Robin and Zoro on top of that." Luffy cocked his head to the side "I thought Sanji had 4 siblings?"

"Oh he does but Yonji’s a little shit. He would never agree to help us so we’ll just go in a man down unless anyone else has other ideas to sneak in or something."

Everyone was surprised when Sanji said he’d talk to his family about it. Especially with his track record with them but apparently they owe him a favor. Whether they manage to pull through was another story. As the debrief was wrapping up Luffy stood up to stretch.

"If all else fails I'm going to kick Mingo’s ass and bring Torao back."

You were sitting on the floor in your room with your back pressed against the door. You had stopped crying a while ago because you overheard the rest of your dorm mates planning to bring Law back. It made you feel better about the whole endeavor. It still hurts but knowing that your friends believe in you and Law means a lot and they're right, you know Law wouldn’t be doing this without a reason. At least that's what you keep telling yourself only time will tell.

___

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[yuukei-yikes]

i hate second manga route for haruka and especially takane's stupid arcs but LIKE I ALWAYS SAY its got so much going for it. ayano and shintaro especially. ayano being the shittiest sister ever and shintaro being Literally the awesomest brother really gets me like its so funny

shintaro being so. Weird/mean in more typical routes because of retaining eyes even if it's repressed/inactive... i know its because kagepro was written in the course Of Years and it's honestly a game of telephone so it's more a matter of lack of consistency rather than this but i like to explain it with that lol

in main route shintaro and momo barely speaking, not being close at all. but in an original way they were THE closest siblings... sniff sniff. like so much was sacrificed in the way to their happy ending, their relationship being one. and for shintaro (with retaining) to eventually remember this but not momo... and how it'd cause a shift in his behavior bc he REMEMBERS all these moments they spent together in some other lifetime and how he felt about it then, and it's simultaneous with how he feels with this lifetime and this specific relationship he's built with his sister. it's a lot!! he doesn't stop being him, but all these other routes are overwritten over one another and how he feels in each one is completely simultaneous with how he feels about the present. augh. this is complicated for all his relationships ofc like (drum rolls) takane because of Many reasons but for example he fucking killt her once and he KNOWS that. but hehe. kisaragi siblings. that was just my obligatory takane mention bc i can't help myself BUT IM TALKING ABT SHINTARO AND MOMO

momo just sees shintaro acting awkward and trying to approach her and she's like 😐weird. ofc she still reciprocates!! like DAMN shintaro wanting to be her brother and get closer to her?? it's one of her biggest wishes come true!!!! but its awkward as fuck!!

shintaro is dealing with MANY things as he goes through life with all these memories + living past the end of the story, and momo is terrified of scaring shintaro away because she doesn't KNOW all he knows and he's shit at trying to communicate and just talk. but maybe their mom can come home and be like oh. u guys are watching tv together?? thats strange. and theyre like oh. yeah i guess <- wrestled for who got the remote, momo obviously won, shintaro complains but still stays to watch whatever the hell obscure tv show momo is into. shintaro keeps criticizing it and momo's like just leave if it bothers u so much and he's like NO. im googling the directors and writers of this as we speak.

also i know ive said this 1000 times but car guy shintaro. this guy gets his license and is everyone's taxi driver. but ESPECIALLY momo. he drives her to school everyday and they scream sing together the entire way. momo makes a car playlist to sing with him but will never admit it's a playlist specifically made with shintaro in mind and how funny she thinks it'll be when call me maybe comes on and shintaro will be like AUGGH THIS SUCKS LOWER THE VOLUME but immediately starts singing too.

AND ALSO he tries teaching her how to drive and she crashes their mom's car and shintaro takes the blame. as punishment he can't use the car for a while. in that while momo still gets her license Somehow even though she is an awful awful driver and now since shintaro isnt allowed to drive for a bit momo is taking him and he's FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFE.

anyways kisaragi siblings😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 also ayaki not only watching shintaro managing to get closer to momo in this lifetime too, but also sees ayano be this supposedly perfect big sister.

post str ayano with all this guilt over abandoning her siblings and feeling totally incapable of everything, both academically and emotionally. but ayaki is still a little jealous bc even if she Knows how ayano must feel (despite not even being in her head like with shintaro. she knows bc she IS ayano) kano kido and seto DO see her as a good big sister. i think ayaki harbors certain "hatred" for the surviving ayano because she. hates herself. and this ayano has everything ayaki fought for and is still just as incapable and it pisses her off. i think both ayanos feel horrible specifically about kano's involvement in everything and what he had to deal with when ayano died. ayaki thinks god. i/she still failed for protect him. this SUCKS. she knows ayano hates herself bc she hates her and she is her💥

....and also in case of shinaya ayakis like THIS IS RIDICULOUSSS!! HIM OF ALL PEOPLE?!?!?! COME ONNNN. erm anyways💥

[brejecat]

Dorothea MoonWater/Moonseeker Mugle AU:

“Hey, Dorothea, do you ever stop and think about me?

When we were younger, down in the park.

Honey, making a lark of the misery”

I was listening to Dorothea by Mrs. Swift the other day and suddenly this AU idea was born:

Walburga was once a famous actress that had fallen under obscurity and wanted her children to pursue a career in the model/movie industry. So, she decided to raise them in a restrictive way since birth. Sirius obviously couldn’t handle that treatment so he left after sometime but Regulus stayed with their mother (kinda similar to canon).

Our lover boys had their first real interaction under the bleachers, Regulus was thinking about showing support to his brother during a game but decided to back off in the last second and Remus was never the biggest fan of crowds so he decided to follow his brother’s friend to see what was going on. Two introverts sharing an awkward moment but that doesn’t necessarily felt bad in their personal opinion, something has changed that day.

Those two become friends and closer after some other experiences and meetings, bonding over academic stuff, books, weird tv shows, love for cats. Their relationship grows in a good slow-paced way until both of them were aware of their own love feelings. Remus decided to confess first expecting the worst (he’s so oblivious sometimes) but it was Regulus who had initiative for their first kiss. Due living in quite a small town they had to be really careful, specially about Black’s mom, her sons not being straight would never be something okay for Walburga considering she believed and planned for the future, Regulus sadly never had the courage to talk about that to anyone besides his closest friends and Remus.

Their love create a cute love bubble but soon Remus slowly start to notice how much pressure is put over his boyfriend shoulders, everything revolving around him being the perfect boy to please his mother wishes. One day, after Regulus prom has passed, they were discussing about the future, their relationship and career plans. It doesn’t ends well, they get into a big fight and after that happened they stop talking to each other with Walburga deciding to move to a big city to focus on her son’s career as a future celebrity.

“I love performing, i love acting, the atmosphere, all the praise and applauses. It’s been like that for such a long time, just because I talked to you about some minor insecurities it doesn’t mean that wouldn’t be a good future for me.”

“Of course not, I know you had a lot of good moments and how much talented you’re, I was sitting in the front row of that play last month remember Love? You know I’ll always support your decisions, don’t you Reggie? I just want you to think if they’re truly yours! I want you to be the happiest and content possible, that you’re doing it for you, not for her but for you own good…”

Some time is passed, Regulus really become famous showing up on tv and commercials, his face is all over magazines and outdoors, now living in a big city and never coming back his hometown. However, miles away from there, in a old small town, everything they did, the time spend together, all the love and memories their shared still is so vivid in Remus mind. Even after all the years passed without communication, Lupin still remembers how they would be going for hours just talking about their favorite books, favorite nerdy tv shows, their kisses and secret dates…

As for Regulus? He tells himself how much lucky he’s, how he’s living ✨the dream✨daily. But sometimes, when his deep thoughts starts bubbling into his mind, Black thinks about missing every day that one person who truly got him, the one who saw behind his facades and fake smiles (but that’s talk for some other time)

(Was it at least decent? That’s my first AU idea so sorry if it sucks haha)

[draculagerard]

u asked for it so i am HERE to tell u about the netflix tv show never have i ever......except im not going to explain Everything super concisely bc i already have a hard enough time trying 2 explain the complexities of devi vishwakumar when my brain is Actually working but rn i am running on three hours of sleep, an energy drink that partially sprayed out of my nose, and some sour punch straws but i am going to do my best to like. idk explain it. apologies in advance bc this got so long im SO sorry. ANYWAY. never have i ever. its about a first-generation indian american girl named devi and she is like. well. not cool. her n her friends are called the "UN" which they thought meant united nations bc they're all woc but no it means unfuckable nerds. and the person who coined the term unfuckable nerds? one ben gross, aka devi's longstanding academic rival. do u see where this is going yet? great. wonderful. devi spends most of season 1 chasing after this jock paxton (who. we do love. just not with devi.) and imploding all of her personal relationships in an attempt to Not Feel the grief of her father dying. at one point she even tells her mom that she wishes her mom died instead of her dad (ouch, but also, been there). atp devi's friends, the other members of the UN, are taking a "friend break" bc she was. well kind of a bitch. so she moves in w ben (rival) for like a week and then he drives her, unlicensed, to where her mom is spreading her dads ashes and then she goes back up to the car and they go "you stayed" "yeah i just wanrted to make sure you were okay" and then KISS. KISS!!!!!!! but then paxton (jock) also likes her so she dates BOTH of them and then implodes on her and they both break up with her. and then she accidentally spreads a rumor around the school about ben's new girlfriend having an eating disorder which ends up being true. and then paxton (jock) dates her again. and then they break up after like 3 months and ben's new girlfriend (aneesa) also breaks up w ben same day and then ben and devi are like. besties for a bit. devi dates a new guy des who honestly should probably be in a relationship with his own mom instead and then he dumps her bc of his mom and THEN. after all of this. ben jokingly gives devi a "one free boink" card. (was it really a joke ben was it i dont think so!!!!) and. at paxton's graduation he sort of mentions devi but not by name and the narrator (which, i should mention the narrator for devi's inner monologue is american tennis player john mcenroe) says she doesnt get stomach knots!!! but then she and ben share an like an intimate moment in the hall and mcenroe says "there's the stomach knots" like!!!!! and THEN later that night!!!!! she goes to ben's house!!!!!!1 and redeems the one free boink card CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!! and thats where season 3 ends....

season 4 comes out in THREE DAYS and weve gotten SOOOO many spoilers for the first two episodes which (if anyone who watches never have i ever is still reading this and doesnt want spoilers please sotp reading) we find out that ben and devi DID boink and that they both thought iut was like?? bad foir the other person??? and ben just didnt know what to say so he asked if she needed him to call an uber like ben WHAT. as rae @ice-sculptures put it "can you believe that ben gross not knowing what to say after fucking led to the whole spiral of miscommunication lmfao" like they just DONT TALK devi tries to ask if he wanted to get coffee and he says NO because a basketball player at the gym told ben that devi wasnt serious about him because she put a period in the text or somethjing?? so instead he goes and dates this girl from art class margot and devi sees ben with her on the first day of school and gets. well upset. and then someone spray paints "STUPID BITCH" on devi's car and of course she thinks its margot!!!! (but shhhh it wasnt....it was actually this kid ethan....more on him later) and then like other stff happens im not super clear about that but basically at some point ben tells devi that margot doesnt want ben talking to devi anymore :( i dont rlly know much else past that i think thats where s4e2 ends??? but we do know that devi ends up DATING that ethan kid at some point but. sooo many things point to ben/devi endgame esp bc her other main love interest (paxton, the jock) is now STAFF at their high school so like?? i dont think they're going that route but im just. dsjfkhjsad SO EXCITED except i cannot watch s4 the day it comes out bc i will be seeing waterparks which. im so excitred for but also WHYYY do they have to be on the same day

i feel like i didnt explain this very well and left out a lot of like pivotal ben/devi moments but im sitting here jus.t typing and not rereading any of this im. So sorry that this is as long as it is jkhsddfsd thank u for reading this and. if u didnt read it i dont blame u szdkjhdfsakd

WOW OKAY HOLY FUCK A LOT GOING ON THERE HUH????? HELLO.

Okay okay key notes:

I already like Devi and I haven't even watched the show.

WHAT THE FUCK IS BEN DOING HELLOOOO. WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM DSFJJFD

by boink im assuming it means fuck right. cause like i've never euphemism in my life

THEY END S3 LIKE THAT ?? FWERLJW

oh LORD devi's complex relationship with her mom okay i hear it

bro the miscommunication sounds SOOO bad... like they cannot communicate properly even once huh 😭

devi ends up dating WHO now???? first the guy who gave them the name un and then the stupid bitch dude?? HELP....

IT COMES OUT IN 3 DAYS??? oh shit good luck??!!

OMG youre gonna go to a Waterparks show????? have fun holy shit

anyways are you kidding ofc i read the whole thing i NEED media rants rn

[erinthesails]

While I recognize logically that these are very different things with different stakes, I can't help thinking that this feels so much like when my undergrad college closed down. Like. My school was a historically women's college, which meant by the time I arrived that all trans and nonbinary people as well as cis women were allowed in. It was the first women's college in the United States to officially allow trans women. It was a 70% queer institution, and a place that has plenty of issues like all academic institutions, but was also a place where I know PERSONALLY that a lot of young queer people found community and institutional support for the first time.

Two years after I graduated, they announced they were closing. There was outcry and heartbreak and anger and more anger and confusion. Where had the money gone? How could this happen without public conversation, and without any indication of why this decision was made and to what end? People fought to raise money, raise awareness, do something, anything to keep the school open. Reached out to the board to see what could be done. Nothing worked. The board was intent on closing, didn't want to consider other options (or couldn't or wouldn't, whatever) and so, after over 100 years of existence, and after 40 years of being a little queer haven, this school closed.

It had sponsors, donors, students, professors who loved it. But it wasn't making enough money for the board, and so, despite everything we tried, it closed. Some big east coast school, known for frats and football, bought the campus and sends students there for semesters out of state. But it's not the same place it once was. And it never will be again, in all likelihood.

The cancelling of ofmd is different from All That, obviously!! But there's such a devaluing of queer spaces, queer stories, queer people right now that I can't help but see the similarities. I wish I had a better way to pull this connection together, to make it feel more okay, but it honestly doesn't feel okay, and I'm really fucking angry, still, about both of these things coming to an end.

But I will mention what other people have brought up here, which is that even with the show over, we still have these incredible communities and connections we've built around it. I was angry and upset when my undergrad closed, but in the wake of it was the realization that I had people to be angry with, who saw and felt and experienced how special that place was. I met incredible people there I still consider to be some of my closest friends! And likewise, ofmd has introduced me to some of the coolest fucking people I know!

I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm pissed the fuck off but grateful for all of you and for what this show has meant to us. I'm still hoping we get picked up by another network! I'm not giving up hope on that yet! But even if we don't, or even if we get picked up by. I don't know, Spike TV, and the show becomes something it was never meant to be, like my old school did, I'm glad for what weve had and for what we'll continue to make together. And redoubling my commitment to support queer creators and stories and people at all fucking costs!!!!

[survey--s]

678.

What is your favorite breakfast food? Pancakes! I actually had them this morning for the first time in months and they tasted SO GOOD. Blueberry pancakes with honey and cream.

Who do you (romantically) love? My husband.

Have you ever considered yourself dirty? No.

What do you do to relax? Mess about online, take baths, cuddle with an assortment of our pets, watch Disney movies, take surveys, watch TikTok.

Do you enjoy kissing? It's okay. I'm not a very sexual person, generally speaking.

What about making out? Same as above.

Where are you most ticklish? The soles of my feet. I can't STAND people touching them. I honestly have no idea how people can tolerate foot massages or pedicures - it's quite literally my idea of hell lol.

Have you ever been to an arena concert? Nope. That would be way too much for me.

Where was the last place you kissed someone? In the kitchen.

Do you know anyone who is expecting? Yeah, one of my clients is due in May.

What does your third text message say in your inbox? The third person I received a text from is Suzanne. I don't know what it said though and I CBA to look, lol.

Do you use speed dial? It doesn't even exist anymore.

If so who is number 5? .

Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex? Yes.

Where do you want to get married? I got married in the registry office in between our house and my parents house. My in-laws live near us so we just picked somewhere in the middle of everyone.

Do you plan on having both your parents at your wedding? They both were there.

If you could visit one person right now, who would it be? Nobody.

Do you like school? I liked the academic side but not the social side.

What is your all time favorite subject that you have ever taken in school? History.

Do you have a current teacher who you wish taught all of your classes? I used to love the history teacher I had in Year 9 or the English teacher I had in year 8. I'd pick them if I could.

What has been your favorite part of this calendar year so far? Beach gallops, getting Simba, my business doing as well as it had.

Are you going on vacation any time soon? I have two weeks off work over Christmas but we're not going anywhere.

Do you catch yourself staring at inappropriate times? Yeah, when I'm daydreaming.

How many times have you been fall-down drunk? 2-3 times.

Has a friend ever really hurt you and you never told them? Yes.

Where would your most romantic getaway spot be? A cozy cottage in Vermont. <--- not gonna lie, that sounds amazing.

Have you ever stayed on a ride at a theme park to ride it again? Yeah, a few times. Our local theme park when I was a kid was never very busy and you used to be able to do that all the time.

Have you ever used your sexuality to get you something you wanted? Yes.

What do you count as too spoiled? I don't think it's about what you give your child, it's about their attitude. I grew up surrounded by money and only a couple of people actually came across as "spoilt".

When you don’t feel good, where do you want to be? At home in bed.

Have you ever set an alarm on your phone to remind you to do something? Sure.

Where do you want to raise your children? I don’t want children.

What is your favorite Crayola scented crayon? I don't think I ever used any scented crayons. I used to like the blueberry gel pens though!

What is your favorite childhood TV show? Arthur.

Do you ever look at yourself and not believe it’s you? Nope.

What’s your favorite hideaway place? Home, or this little oasis I found in the sand dunes last week. It's just tucked away and so pretty.

Do you have a secret you have kept from your family? Sure. Personally I think it's weird to tell your family everything.

Have you ever slow danced to a song you didn’t know? Probably.

Where do you study? I don't.

Do you study at all? No.

What do you want to be when you grow up? I'm a dog walker/pet sitter.

Has someone ever dedicated a song to you? Yes.

How many people have you kissed this month? One.

Do you like do have your hair pulled? Nope.

Are you close with your parents? Yeah, with my mum at least. I don't really speak to my dad.

How much do you wish/ hope for something before you give up? I mean, I don't wish or hope for things, really. If I really want something I go and make it happen.

Have you ever hung out with a complete stranger? Not just us, but in a group of other people, yeah.

Do you work any holidays? Nope. One of the main advantages of being self-employed. I really do NOT miss it. At all.

[maya-matlin]

Obviously Naley is one of the best TV ships of all time, maybe even THE best, so I'm challenging you to name a few things you don't love or would change about the way their ship was written! For me a big one is their S2 plot and her music storylines in general- I'm all for conflict but I thought Haley, who values personal relationships so much more than 'celebrity', was pretty out of character through S2. I also ---pet peeve alert - HATE how all the main OTH characters are not only athletes and cheerleaders but soooo gifted creatively! Lucas becomes a semi-famous novelist, Peyton becomes the producer of her own record company in addition to being a gifted artist, Brooke has her own fabulously successful fashion line which she started back in high school, and we then get Julian who's a successful film director and Alex Dupree who's a B-list movie star. Nathan isn't creatively gifted but is of course not just a great athlete but good enough to be in the .0001% who gets to the NBA. And they all still live in this small North Carolina town lol...I mean, I don't expect the show to be strictly realistic, but come on! More than even one of those things happening strains credulity. So I loved that Haley was presented as the ONE character who was so relatable and into academics and down to earth and all that, but the show then suddenly decides after S1 purely because the actress likes to sing that Haley is not just a decent singer but good enough to immediately go on TOUR?! What?!?! It's an aspect of the show that annoys the hell out of me. I loved Haley as a teacher for a variety of reasons and think it's the perfect career choice for her and will always resent that they had to also make her a star singer lol. 3. I'll still never quite get why Naley had to marry a few months into their relationship when they were just juniors in high school and there was no pregnancy. 4. So I like Nathan a lot overall, but there's no denying that he was a HORRIBLE, borderline emotionally abusive boyfriend to Peyton (as you've pointed out, he left her stranded on a dark and deserted road, was super cruel to her, and was all set to let her suffer legal consequences for a car accident HE caused lol) and I just don't love the "but the RIGHT girl can immediately tame and save the bad boy" trope. So I love that Naley brought out the best in each other, of course, but I just wish the change in Nathan hadn't been quite so abrupt! OK, thanks for listening to be vent!

Hmm. The thing about parts of Naley's season 2 arc is that personally, I think Nathan and Haley were mostly in character during everything leading up to Haley leaving for the tour. In my opinion, it's a pretty realistic depiction of what happens when you get married as teenagers following a short relationship before you've been able to become independent people. The circumstances were pretty unrealistic. In real life, a small town girl probably wouldn't end up going on tour a couple of months into performing live for the first time in her life. Haley's career wouldn't have taken off nearly as fast without Chris there to vouch for her talents and bringing The Wreckers to Tree Hill. But if we ignore all of that, the reality is that Haley spent her entire life afraid to take chances. Falling in love with and marrying Nathan allowed Haley to be more impulsive and to become a braver person. Nathan, in contrast, needed Haley's stability and good influence. While he was the same age at her and hadn't been allowed to live independently away from his toxic and abusive parents for long, he had more romantic and sexual relationship experience prior to Haley and was looking to slow down rather than jumping into new things. So for Nathan, giving up something like High Flyers was less of a big deal at the time than Haley choosing not to go with Chris to New York. Nathan had grown up with a life of privilege, receiving the best money could buy as far as getting ahead as an athlete. Plus by the end of season 1 and first half of season 2, you could assume that Nathan was beginning to associate basketball with Dan and kind of happy to stop defining himself as Nathan the basketball guy. In the long run had Haley never gone on tour but Nathan also not gone to High Flyers, I think it's possible Nathan himself would have began to feel stifled and grown resentful of putting his dreams on hold solely to be a husband. Anyways. I think Haley liked having something all her own independent of Nathan, and the Chris factor and her lack of experience with men prior to Nathan put her in a messy situation. There are multiple episodes where the subtext is that Haley on some level regrets rushing into marriage or has doubts about it (201, 205, 210, 217). I think it's completely understandable for Haley to feel that way. As much as I love them and consider them one of all my time favorite couples, they weren't ready to be married. Nathan and Haley had to learn to be better partners to each other and as the seasons went by, they became more successful. But during season 2, everything was new and more uncertain. So rather than being honest with Nathan about the kiss with Chris and her perspective re: putting her dreams on hold, Haley panicked and kind of internalized everything out of fear of what it all meant or the ramifications of what she'd done.

In regards to your thoughts about Haley craving fame, I don't know that it was really about the fame part as much as it was Haley wanting to pursue music and getting professional validation and fulfillment from performing and having people like her music. Haley says she loved every night of performing and she seemed to be excited about appearing on television, but I wouldn't say it meant much more than that. However, Haley's POV is very vague and confusing following 213. She's only ever shown either in brief phone conversations or when Nathan and Lucas visited her on tour. During 217 in particular, Haley is poorly written. Not because her thoughts and feelings aren't valid, but because the words coming out of her mouth are a piece of forced writing meant to ensure that Nathan and Haley remain separated and that Nathan essentially gives up on their marriage. Haley is not given the chance to explain herself. So as a result, Haley appears selfish and like she cares more about being a rockstar than Nathan's feelings. That's exactly what the writers wanted at the time. The story of Naley's separation and Haley's time on the tour was NEVER about Haley. It was all about Nathan's pain, depression, and his fight through the pain of losing the love of his life. Haley's role on the show was minimized to the point of her becoming a villain for having ambitions and for making mistakes the same as the other characters. It got a little better when Lucas visited Haley because Lucas was close enough to Haley that he truly wanted to understand and was willing to hear her out. So, we got the official explanation that Haley stopped wearing her wedding band because she no longer felt she deserved to wear it. The moment she presumably removes her wedding ring would have been prior to her televised interview. Yet, Haley keeps her ring finger covered up. She compromises herself by denying the marriage while also kind of upholding it? She still refers to herself as Haley James Scott and doesn't officially flaunt the fact she isn't wearing her ring, but she allows Chris to lie about their relationship. I feel like I've completely lost the plot here, but what I mean to say is that I don't take issue with most of Haley's writing in season 2. I simply think she was written by people completely uninterested in her perspective and her journey compared to Nathan's and REALLY lost out on the lack of consistent writing and POV during episodes 214-223.

What would I change about their writing? Well, obviously a lot of season 2 LOL. I think we should have seen Haley's time on the tour. We should have seen her becoming confident and thriving in the spotlight all the while missing Nathan and being heartbroken over what she's been forced to give up in the name of chasing her dreams. It's implied Haley and Chris were good friends during this time. It would have been nice to see the shift from Chris kind of aggressively coming on to Haley to Haley making it clear nothing was ever going to happen between them, and Chris accepting this enough to become Haley's confidant. Beyond that, I would have given Haley more of a backbone during season 3. I think she stood her ground when absolutely necessary, but Nathan also kind of held all the cards for a lot of season 3. His attitude about her Halloween costume for instance was bullshit. He also should have put his damn wedding band back on before they officially became engaged again because they'd been sleeping together for months and were literally living together by that point. What was I supposed to take from that other than Haley hadn't yet earned it? In season 4, I would have liked Nathan and Haley to have gotten an equal focus during her pregnancy. Season 5, I think more should have come out of their separation story line. I loved the episode where they reunited, but it also kind of seemed a little too easy for Nathan. I obviously don't blame him for the majority of what went down with Carrie or her predatory behavior, but the fact he was watching her swim naked was SO sketchy. There were multiple moments throughout the series where the possibility of Nathan cheating on Haley came up and it was always horribly executed. Whether he went through with it or not, it was annoying for Haley to constantly have these physical threats. Like, Haley was beautiful and sexy as hell, and Mark Schwahn was a demon. I also don't feel like Haley doubting Nathan re: Renee in season 7 was needed. That felt like a retread of season 5. Thankfully, it didn't last very long. Otherwise, I honestly don't have any complaints. More often than not, their relationship was well written.

I completely agree that it was unrealistic for all of the main five to basically become superstars. That took some realism away from the show and made the later, adult seasons harder to enjoy because like.. we're watching Nathan and Haley in their big house where a professional football player seriously shows up at their son's birthday party. While the show overall felt grounded for the entirety of the series, those moments detracted from the series as a whole. That being said, I LOVE rockstar Haley, so we'll have to disagree there. It's not that I don't enjoy her as a teacher or someone interested in helping others learn. It's just that teaching was never Haley's dream. It was something she was good at, but it never fulfilled her the same way being a musician did. On that note, it annoys me that the writers felt the need to make Haley smaller to make Nathan look/feel bigger. By season 7, Haley once again was a musician full time. But when Nathan retired from the NBA to become a sports agent, Haley took over Karen's Cafe rather than continuing to perform. Just to be clear, there's nothing wrong with any of these professions. They're not inherently "lesser". It's just that it was written that while being in the NBA was Nathan's dream, Haley's dream was being a singer. Ultimately, I don't think Haley was ever supposed to be super successful even at the height of her career. The potential was there during season 2 and obviously she toured again in season 7, but I never got the impression she ever achieved the same kind of fame that Nathan and Brooke did.

Yeah, I'm of two minds about that. Part of me is like, "Yessss! Naley forever!" When I was watching season 2 for the first time when I was around 12, their teen marriage was couple goals to me. Nathan and Haley are a rare case of two people that settled down young and still managed to live happily ever after. But on the other hand, we see how much of a mistake it was to rush into marriage. When Nathan proposed, he told Haley she was the only true thing he had. He put SO much stock into that marriage. I genuinely think part of the reason he proposed at all was the fear of losing her after that porn fight. Had Haley not wanted to explicitly wait until marriage for sex, I doubt the thought would have occurred to him. Haley let herself get swept away by the romance of young, first love and was a wife before she'd even experienced anything. From a story line standpoint, I love it. But speaking as someone twice their age at the time of the marriage, there were so many reasons why they should have waited.

I don't think I was the one to point that out, but I 100% agree with those points! I always forget how bad Nathan was during the first few episodes of season 1 because he'd grown tremendously by 122. But jesus christ, he was the boyfriend from hell. It really came across like half the time, Nathan used Peyton as a sex toy. He learned a lot of horrible, toxic messages from a young age and was on the path to becoming Dan Scott when Haley came into his life. You're correct that that particular trope is oftentimes really gross and overdone in fiction. Thankfully, I actually think OTH is one of the few shows to get it right. Peyton is never blamed for Nathan's bad behavior or viewed as "lesser" than Haley for being unable to fix Nathan. Their relationship was toxic and they couldn't have been more wrong for each other. Both Nathan and Peyton always stressed how awful their relationship was, and Nathan is thankfully quick to own up to his bad behavior during their relationship. But, you make a good point. Nathan's turnaround from emotionally abusive asshole boyfriend to sweet and patient boyfriend to Haley happened very quickly. Really, everything with Naley in season 1 was pretty rushed and could have used a few more episodes. The pacing is way off. They spent so much time building up to their first "I love you" only to have them married three episodes later. I think the key to Nathan's shift is that originally, I believe the Nathan/Peyton/Lucas triangle was supposed to go on longer. Since that ended up being replaced by the infamous Brooke/Lucas/Peyton triangle, that freed Nathan up to get together with Haley sooner.

You're welcome! I apologize for the length of my answer!

[anakinskywalkerog]

omg no way tumblr never bothered to tell me you replied. plus why is nothing showing up in my following feed??? a bone to pick for next time ig

ahaha i missed this too you're so good with advice! ❤ and thank you hehe i have been informed the new pfp it a character calld lust from an anime called fullmetal alchemist, but i just like the aesthetic

it really is and thank youuuuu! im sure it will! *sends ✨good luck✨*

hmm i dont wanna obsess over han at all, because first of all, ELI! that would be unfair. and han is sort of crazy, anyways. i am listening to i can see you from speak now tv but i shouldnt because it reminds me of han. it also reminds me of anakin. very anakincore track. i cant help it though, i can see you is so good, although it gives more of a reputation vibe than speak now tbh. still love it anyways and thank mother taylor for it. are you enjoying speak now tv? what's your favourite track? i think im enjoying mine, mean and back to december, but everything is ofc v nice! wish we had a mine pop mix tv and some more beat to enchanted, but its perfect as it is!

yess "there will be plenty more guys 😂 trust me." that's exactly what i thought, too! like, he's here now, but someday there's going to be someone else EXACTLY like that. although it might not be so bad if i did make a decision influenced by him because he and i have a similar objective - physics/engineering degree at oxford/cambridge so its a win-win no matter which way i go ig. plus we're academic rivals. competition is the norm for us. but about intrigue with han...

"oh? whos your friend? (i asked han to pose for one of my snaps hehe) is this friend good-looking?"

... dude? like, WHAT? that sounds like pretty blatant flirting to me.

but lets not forget that once we were in the corridor and bro leaned in super close (keep in mind this was months ago and this was in the middle of like 15 other people anyways) and i leaned away out of reflex 😂 i think he looked at me later with a very patronizingly disappointed

kinda expression. i think that was a test, and i failed miserably but thats fine 💀

eli really is we even have loads of similar interests!

yw and sameee! it is hehe she even send me memes and is a pedro pascal stan (as she should. pedro pascal is an icon. love him) ! very happy with that

oh no, is everything okay? can i do anything to help? if it helps, my life is only peaceful because i am in isolation from all friends, hehe i need time to regenerate. i am an ambivert at heart. my extrovert meter needs to recharge lmaooo

also, a part of me wonders if cranberry is mad at me? basically, he aksed me to write a steamy story abt him and han (thyre best friends) and didnt want his gf to find out incase she thought he was weird (bro she already does. shes ur gf. she knows what weird she signed up for smh)

anyways i made a small oopsie. i asked some people to critique it for me, and one of those poeple may have been the girl from my diary, whos friends with cranberry's gf, and who previously told machete i liked him when i wanted it to be a scret and explicitly told her so, and the one who i knew cannot be trusted with secrets because she will tell someone and lie about it 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

anyways cranberry was annoyed (and understandably so.) he said his gf was mad at him (impossible - if she was, shed be mad at ME first cos thats how women are. better than revenge is living proof. but she isnt! ) and i get it, but then people stop being mad, right? i mean, ive been really mad at him too, for a variety of reasons. i forgave him though and he didnt even apologize like i did! but he seemed normal at prom perhaps a bit icy? a guy friend told me im overthinkinngit and while he may have been annoyed it doesnt mean hd stop being friends with me or anything, and that he definitely wouldnt stay mad because its not a big deal.

but i texted him cranberry with a pretty obvious joke and he didnt even find it funny??? like thats HIS sort of joke??? how does he ot find that funny??? my friend says he must be mad then, but says theres the chance he just didnt find it funny?

like, i get it, but i want to make amends! and i wont even see cranberry in person so i can never tell. but if he was mad, he wouldve blocked me, or left me on delivered, or just opened. but he even sees my stories n stuff!

plus his friends would be mad if something happened. like guys are super gangy like that. but his friends are not mad at all, like han and this other guy are totally normal and no one sad that. even when han brought it up the day after the whole thing, he didnt imply it was serious and just dropped it after joking around abt it.

my friend did say if i was friends with cranberrys friends, it doesnt mean they have to be mad, but what if cranberry and his gf broke up over something as stupid as a joke???? and it was my fault??? i would feel awful and i cant even tell or say sorry.

nor can i ask han over text cos then hed tell cranberry and itd be weird. and i cant ask eli cos i dont want to set a bad rep.

he texted about it and i delved into a tiny argument he said its fine but "just think more next time". i think he and han both know i didnt mean for this to happen and that it was a genuine accident, but people gte hurt over things even if they know it wasnt meant to hurt them. shoulve said no is proof of this.

but they did send me a video of them reading the story together [cranberry and his friends, it was han who filmed (i did ask them to film their reaction)] and cranberry was cracking up as he read it! if he was mad he wouldve abandoned it. but they sill seemed to love it. surely if cranberry was mad at me, then that wouldnt have happened?

jesus christ, thats LONG. i apologize for troubling you, i didnt think itd get this long! its just been on my mind :( ironically it happened yesterday just after i was so happy. ugh. boys are awful

yes haha thank youuu :) if you're okay with my constant somewhat accidental drama dumps, i definitely will :D

love you and stay safe x

hi sythe so sorry it took me so long to respond to this!

I hope all is well with Eli. but GIRL have I been listening to “I Can See You” sooooo much it’s literally the delulu girl anthem! I love it. having a little crush on Han just adds some spice!! there’s nothing wrong with a little seasoning to an otherwise boring existence 😂

I am okay 🩵 just really been struggling with my OCD lately. I hope it gets better soon.

no fuckinf WAY cranberry asked you to write a steamy story!!? girl that is NOT platonic. what are these men doing out here 😂😂😂😂 but I agree, very unlikely that he is mad at you

I love the drama dumps, I wish we could vent together for real because I have been ALL over the place with my drama lately 😅 but it’s fine, it adds the comedy. i’m watching my own life like a work of absurdism. I would absolutely recommend that strategy.

[logiyande]

{ ayo edebiri, 21, cis woman, she/her } Is that LOGAN IYANDE? A SOPHOMORE originally from SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA, they decided to come to Ogden College to study GRAPHIC DESIGN  on a ACADEMIC SCHOLARSHIP. They’re THE WALLFLOWER  on campus, but even they could get blamed for Greer’s disappearance.

pinterest/spotify

yearning, dreaming, resting her head against the car door and closing her eyes, imagining a world where she is a different person, where people look up when she enters a room and stop talking when she starts to speak. suburbs, doldrums, everything that will happen to her has already happened before. the glow of a computer screen in the middle of the night, an aching familiarity with the four walls of her bedroom. the urge to think that no one understands her when fearing maybe there isn’t that much to understand. speaking a language that is so entrenched in decades of internet debris that she doesn’t know if people know how to translate. wondering if she is more interesting behind a keyboard than she is in person. sketchbooks filled with art no one would ask to see. wasting her youth, wasting her breath, wasting her time. 

BASICS:

full name: logan iyande

age: 21

date of birth: march 18

zodiac sign: pisces sun, cancer moon, virgo rising

hometown: sacramento, CA

gender: cis female

sexuality: lesbian

ethnicity: african american

languages spoken: english

PERSONALITY:

positive qualities: kind, curious, intelligent

negative qualities: geeky, introverted, naive

skills: encyclopedic knowledge on niche topics, quick reflexes, and deviantart fame for drawing niche cartoon characters in 2011

character parallels: Chidi Anagonye (The Good Place), Sam Weir (Freaks and Geeks), Willow Rosenberg (BTVS), Will Byers (Stranger Things), Lexi Howard (Euphoria), Haruhi Fujioka (OHSHC)

relationship to greer: if you looked on logan’s instagram history, you would almost always see @greer in her recently viewed. it’s not that she was obsessed with greer- she hardly knew her, had shared a class with her freshman year, and that was all. but greer represented everything she wasn’t, and she watched her with a keen eye more suited to an anthropologist studying another culture than a classmate watching another. 

school activities: running team, school paper

style: grandpacore- big thrifted sweaters, baggy jeans, trousers, loafers

the wallflower: people did not notice logan at a party, and that’s just fine with her. frankly, she didn’t want to be at the party anyways, would rather be in her dorm room curled up with a weighty book or tending to her farm in stardew valley. she felt stupid and exposed on the nights she dragged herself to a party she’d only been invited to as an afterthought, so she only did it rarely, when the little voice inside her head told her she was wasting her twenties under the covers. she made a fool of herself anyways- she didn’t get the sarcasm, wasn’t interested in the drugs, didn’t know the music that was being played or the tv shows that were being discussed. no, she was sure everyone laughed about her when she left. the more cutting truth, that no one was talking about her at all, would actually be a comfort. 

wanted connections (under construction)

woman for her to have a heartbreaking unrequited crush on (maybe she's straight in a Wish You Were Gay (by claud not billie eilish) type way? or maybe they'll just never see logan that way a la Christine by lucy dacus)

outgoing friend for her to follow around like a puppy

friends to lovers yearning kind of thing (she IS a yearner in all ways and forms)

toxic ex/situationship that she’s still a little in love with (ok i kind of have this one in my head i think she felt like they were embarrassed by her or talked down to her regardless of whether or not that was the truth)

go with me here some kind of cinderella story friendship?? like they’re friends through the internet but don’t know who the other person is irl

other headcanons

was a big tumblr artist a few years back for mid-2000s cartoons (like u know the vibe. avatar, teen titans, ect)- made the jump to twitter and still has a largeish following but not nearly as big as the early 2010s

maybe a little too into lord of the rings

had a big anime phase in middle school but has (mostly) grown out of it

listens to a lot of indie sad girl music (lizzy mcalpine, lucy dacus, ect) but has a soft spot for old school country

has a very large vinyl collection

i don't feel like writing out her family stuff but she actually has a really great relationship with her parents especially her mother

has been in dozens of car accidents but only by hitting parked cars when trying to park

will read literally anything- she's gone through the entire ice planet barbarians series in the last month

really loves horror movies but hates jumpscares so she looks them up on imdb before