#i wish i was alone
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I like this side blog because it is where I can let what’s hurting me out. When I’m in the dark and don’t want to share- I can do it here. I don’t even care if I’m talking to myself. It’s like my diary in a way. I isolate and I get down and everything seems bleak, dark, and hopeless. The darkness helps me learn and grow- but only if I’ll let it. I need to let it. I still have a lot to learn. For the few that follow me, Thank you.
#I needed to vent#I’m not even sure if I’m making sense#having a hard day that I can’t find the perfect quote#me#sad#lonely#lost#feeling trapped#I wish I was alone#it would be easier than feeling alone when I am not#i don’t know wjat to do with myself
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So how about that new episode?
#the magnus protocol#tmagp#tmagp spoilers#the magnus protocol spoilers#sorry i do love compulsion as horror#yess sam. share your childhood trauma sam#struggle against it as your story is ripped from you while you're alone cold and in the rain#wish we got to properly hear gwen's when she was compelled
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- Anything you wanna unburden yourself with, before this… happens? - Yes. I have wishes to bestow upon you.
#guess he eventually got what he wished for#eddie is now completely all alone#venom the last dance#symbrock#venom 3#venom#eddie brock#cletus kasady#i was showering and suddenly kassadys lines flashed in front of my eyes like it was an episode from thats so raven#quickly washed my ass and ran to my computer
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Pretty much only music makes me happy.I wish I could listen to music forever.I wish I could avoid human contact forever and just be by myself without anyone interrupting me ever.I don’t like talking to people.I don’t like people.I don’t even know if I like myself.I don’t want to go to school.I don’t want to be near people.I just want to be alone.I just want to listen to music.
#i wish it would rain#i wish i was alone#i want to be alone#why can’t i do anything right#why can’t i have this#i want it to be cold#i wanna be alone#i want to listen to music
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Gravity falls as onion headlines part II part I part III
#i don't like this one as much#still wanted to share#i wish the fandom explored shermie more#imagine being the baby of the family and essentially never meeting your older twin brothers#shermie was alone he didn't have someone like the twins did#he had to suffer his dad all alone#ofcourse unlike the twins he might have had friends#still#gravity falls#billford#stanely pines#stanford pines#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddauthor#bill cipher#onion headlines
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highly doubt they would ever meet but I'm curious what The Hunter would write about Dewi
Dewi
A human child, the largest living creature in Hallownest. His skin is soft, but strength lurks behind his stride.
༻━━━━━━━━━━༻✧༺━━━━━━━━━━༺
Legends tell of immense godly creatures who strode through clouds and walked across the plane in times of old. Perhaps such fantastical stories are not as unthinkable as they once were...
....
A strange mountainous creature. Though he seeks the thrill of the hunt, he does not close in for the kill. Us mere bugs seem to be easy prey. To be truly hunted by a creature so vast is a bewitching thought.
༻━━━━━━━━━━༻✧༺━━━━━━━━━━༺
I absolutely love The Hunter, so of course he'd make a visit to see the beast everyone in Hallownest has been whispering about (and when I say everyone I mean like 10 people).
#Here is your food you ravenous hyenas :)#I love reading the Hunter's journals. They're informative but he adds a fun spin to them. Makes me feel less alone in game#Hunter: ''Wow I wish this thing would hunt me.''#Dewi: ''Wow I wish I could study him under a microscope"#The Hunter IS HUGE. He's literally bigger than Hollow. WHAT#ask stuff#dewi's adventures in hollow knight#the hunter hollow knight#hollow knight#hollow knight the hunter#my art#art
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Homer!Odysseus and Epic!Odysseus would try to kill each other if they ever met
#Homer!Odysseus: you sacrificed your men to save yourself? Detestable coward! How I wish I was never born if it would ensure you had not the#Epic!Odysseus: you’d understand if you *loved your wife.* But I guess a guy who stayed with Circe for a year wouldn’t know that!#H!Odysseus: do not speak of things you know nothing about! I long for my return to sweet Penelope but I have a duty to my men#E!Odysseus: A YEAR. A WHOLE YEAR. I WOULD KILL ANYTHING AND ANYONE TO GET A HOME A YEAR FASTER#H!Odysseus: that was clear when you served Scylla six men like they were cattle!#E!Odysseus: it was them or me! And don’t keep talking about my friends like you did any better. you’ll go home alone too#H!Odysseus: they doomed themselves when they ate Hyperion’s golden cattle. I am not responsible for their suffering. But you could have ens#H!Odysseus: Now Eurylochus’s body lies at the bottom of the sea where there can be no burial and no honour#E!Odysseus: AND I’LL GO HOME TO MY WIFE. MY BEAUTIFUL PERFECT LOVELY LOYAL WIFE WHO’S BEEN WAITING FOR ME FOR TWENTY YEARS.#E!Odysseus: and when I go home and she asks if I came back as fast as I could I’ll be able to answer honestly#H!Odysseus: WE HAD BEEN THROUGH MANY TRIALS. THE MEN NEEDED TO REST#E!Odysseus: FOR A YEAR???? DID THEY NEED TO REST FOR A YEAR??? AND DID THEY NEED THAT REST RIGHT AFTER A MONTH’S LONG REST WITH AEOLUS??? S#H!Odysseus: IF YOU WISHED FOR ITHACA SO DESPERATELY WHY DIDN’T YOU OBEY PALLAS ATHENA AND KILL THE CYCLOPS#E!Odysseus: *drawing sword* I WAS HAVING A ROUGH DAY#Epic the musical#Epic odysseus#The odyssey#odysseus#Homer#Greek mythology#Jorge rivera-herrans#nuclear war speaks
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i love the dragon tamer saying plainly that dragons "are not playthings for games of men" and rhaenyra just ignoring him like yep that encapsulates the entire reason for the dragons going extinct, because targaryens could not stop using them as cannon fodder and killed them all
#i'm still so bitter about the dragons in case you couldn't tell#i wish everyone yes rhaenyra included would LEAVE THEM TF ALONE#sort your shit out yourselves for fuck's sake#hotd#house of the dragon#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon spoilers#hotd s2 spoilers#house of the dragon season 2 spoilers#house of the dragon s2#hotd s2#hotd s2 e7#house of the dragon season 2 episode 7
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forever thinking about royal’s bad ending. my thing with it is that maruki doesn’t necessarily give anyone what they want most, he gives them what’s most appropriate for them to want within a maruki-approved framework. iirc there’s a really interesting text sequence in the game where he just straight up changes someone’s career because they’re not “good” at it, regardless of whether that’s what they actually want. why struggle at all? ever? right?
and so ultimately i don’t think goro akechi’s greatest wish is necessarily ren. i think it’s a wish for sure, but his greatest wish is his own agency. despite any regrets he has and the fact that shido and yaldabaoth treated him like a pawn, he's generally pretty adamant about owning his choices and their consequences. he doesn't want that erased. and instead, you end up with pleasant boy™ if you take maruki’s deal. maybe maruki (incorrectly) thinks sanding off all of akechi’s rough edges will make him easier for ren to love. but the crux of it is really that maruki has to essentially lobotomize him to preserve the illusion of his perfect reality, because their ideologies are so diametrically opposed that akechi would spend every waking moment fighting back.
this isn’t to undermine ren’s importance to akechi btw — he explicitly acknowledges that he wishes they had met earlier, and there are countless moments throughout their confidant that underscore how much it means to him that they mirror each other so well. he absolutely does want more time with ren, just not under these circumstances.
and that’s also what makes ren’s choice on 2/2 doubly devastating. he knows that either way he loses akechi. and if he takes maruki’s deal, he loses him knowing that his last moments with the real akechi involved the two of them being unforgivably out of sync.
#shuake#ren amamiya#goro akechi#takuto maruki#persona 5#DOES THIS MAKE SENSE#this has been on my mind for ages#siri play ideal and the real dot mp3#like the two of them happily playing chess together hits hard bc in another life they could’ve had that#but the thing is#neither of them want another life! they just want each other as is!#me for the millionth time: takuto maruki most interesting antagonist of all time#tired of all the one dimensional evil villains#give me the pathetic wet cat man who projects his issues w his ex gf onto u and turns ur bf into a stepford wife ❤️#will the real goro akechi please stand up#*#wishing i had the time to replay this game for 3rd sem alone but alas. capitalism strikes again. adulthood is a scam#so instead i am rotating these guys endlessly in my mind and throwing my thoughts out into the void#eta: have really been enjoying seeing ppl's tags on this!!!#thank u for rotating them in ur mind as well
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deranged showtime
#caine x pomni#showtime tadc#the amazing digital circus#caine tadc#pomni tadc#can i get more deranged showtime#or am i just alone on this one#maybe im just a fan of caine being unintentionally really fucked up#i mean he is in the show but. kind of wish he was worse
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Writing Prompt #12
Bruce is reading the paper when the pour of Tim's coffee goes abruptly quiet. It would be hard to pinpoint why this is disturbing if it wasn't for the way the soft, tinny sound the vent system in the manor makes cuts out for the first time since being updated in the 90s. The pour, Bruce realizes, has not slowed to a trickle before stopping. It has simply stopped. And there is no overeager clack of a the mug against the marble counter or the uncouth first slurp (nor muttered apology at Alfred's scolding look) immediately following the end of the pour.
Bruce fights the instinct to use all of his senses to investigate, and instead keeps his eyes on the byline of the article detailing the latest set of microearthquakes to hit the midwest in the last week. Microearthquakes aren't an unusual occurrence and aren't noticeable by human standards, which is why this article is regulated to page seven, but from several hundred a day worldwide to several hundred a day solely in the East North Central States, seismologists are baffled.
Bruce had been considering sending Superman to investigate under the guise of a Daily Planet article requested by Bruce Wayne (Wayne Industries does have an offshoot factory in the area) when everything had stopped twenty seconds ago. That is what he assumes has happened (having not moved a muscle to confirm) in the amount of time he assumes has passed. His million dollar Rolex does not quite audibly tick but in the absolute silence it should be heard, which confirms the silence to be exactly that—absolute.
While Bruce can hold his breath with the best of the Olympian swimmers, he has never accounted for a need to remain without blinking without being able to move one's eyes. Rotating the eyeballs will maintain lubrication such that one could go without blinking for up to ten minutes. But staring at the byline fixedly, he estimates another twenty seconds before tears start to form.
These are the thoughts Bruce distracts himself with, because he doesn't dare consider how Tim and Alfred haven't made a (living) sound in the past forty-five seconds. About Damian, packing his bag upstairs for school after a morning walk with Titus that was "just pushing it, Master Damian".
There is a knife to his right, if memory serves (it does). In the next five seconds—
"Your wards and guardian are fine, Mr. Wayne," the deepest voice Bruce has ever heard intones. For a dizzying moment, it is hard to pinpoint the location of the voice, for it comes from everywhere—like the chiming of a clocktower whilst inside the tower, so overpowering he is cocooned in its volume.
But it is not spoken loudly, just calmly, and when he puts the paper down, folds it, and looks to his right, a blue man sits in Dick's chair.
He wears a three piece suit made entirely of hues of violet, tie included. He has a black brooch in the shape of a cogwheel pinned to his chest pocket, a simple chain clipped to his lapel. Black leather gloves delicately thumb Bruce's watch (no longer on his wrist, somewhere between second 45 and 46 it has stopped being on his wrist), admiring it.
"You'll forgive me," the man says with surety. "Clocks are rather my thing, and this is an impressive piece." He turns it over and reveals the 'M. Brando' roughly scratched into the silver back. He frowns.
"What a shame," he says, placing it face side up on the table.
"Most would consider that the watch's most valuable characteristic." Bruce says, voice steady, hands neatly folded before him. Two inches from the knife. To his left, there is an open doorway to the kitchen. If he turns his head, he might be able to get a glance of Tim or Alfred.
He doesn't look away from the man.
"It is the arrogance of man," the man says, raising red eyes (sclera and all) to Bruce, "to think they can make their mark on time."
"...Is that supposed to be considered so literally?" Bruce asks, with a light smile he does not mean.
The man smiles lightly back, eyes crinkling at the corners. He looks to be in his mid thirties, clean-shaven. His skin is a dull blue, his hair a shock of white, and a jagged scar runs through one eye and curving down the side of his cheek, an even darker, rawer shade of blue-purple.
The man turns the watch back over and taps at the engraving. "Let me ask you this," he says. "When we deface a work of art, does it become part of the art? Does it add to its intrinsic meaning?"
Bruce forces his shoulders to shrug. "It's arbitrary," he says. "A teenager inscribes his name on the wall of an Ancient Egyptian temple and his parents are forced to publicly apologize. But runic inscriptions are found on the Hagia Sophia that equate to an errant Viking guard having inscribed 'Halfdan was here' and we consider it an artifact of a time in which the Byzantine Empire had established an alliance with the Norse and converted vikings to Christianity."
"The vikings were as errant as the teenager," the man says, "in my experience." He leans back in his chair. "I suppose you could say the difference is time. When time passes, we start to think of things as artistic, or historical. We find the beauty in even the rubble, or at least we find necessity in the destruction..."
He offers Bruce the watch. After a moment, Bruce takes it.
"The problem, Mr. Wayne, is that time does not pass for me. I see it all as it was, as it is, as it ever will be, at all times. There is no refuge from the horror or comfort in that one day..." he closes his hand, the leather squeaking. And then his face smooths out, the brief severity gone. He regards Bruce calmly.
"You can look left, Mr. Wayne."
Bruce looks left. Framed by the doorway, Tim looks like a photograph caught in time. A stream of coffee escapes the spout of the stainless steel pot he prefers over the Breville in the name of expediency, frozen as it makes its way to the thermos proclaiming BITCH I MIGHTWING. Tim regards his task with a face of mindless concentration, mouth slack, lashes in dark relief against his pale skin as he looks down at the mug. Behind him, Bruce can see Alfred's hand outstretched towards the refrigerator handle, equally and terrifyingly still.
"My name is Clockwork," the man says. "I have other names, ones you undoubtedly know, but this one will be bestowed upon me from the mouth of a child I cherish, and so I favor it above all else. I am the Keeper of Time."
"What do you want from me?" Bruce asks, shedding Wayne for Batman in the time it takes to meet Clockwork's eyes. The man acknowledges the change with a greeting nod.
"In a few days time, you will send Superman to the Midwest to investigate the unusual seismic activity. By then, it will be too late, the activity will be gone. They will have already muzzled him."
"Him."
"There is a boy with the power to rule the realm I come from. Your government has been watching him. The day he turned 18, they took him from his family and hid him away. I want you to retrieve him. I want you to do it today."
"Why me?"
"His parents do not have the resources you do, both as Batman and Bruce Wayne. You will dismantle the organization that is keen on keeping him imprisoned, and you will offer him a scholarship to the local University. You and yours will keep him safe within Gotham until he is able to take his place as my King."
This is a lot of information to take in, even for Bruce. The idea that there could be a boy powerful enough to rule over this (god, his mind whispers) entity and that somehow, he has slipped under all of their radars is as frustrating as it is overwhelming. But although Clockwork has seemed willing to converse, he doesn't know how many more questions he will get.
"You have the power to stop time," he decides on, "why don't you rescue him? Would he not be better suited with you and your people?"
"Within every monarchy, there is a court," Clockwork. "Mine will be unhappy with the choice I have made," he looks at Bruce's watch, head cocked. "In different worlds, they call you the Dark Knight. This will be your chance to serve before a True King."
Bruce bristles. "I bow to no one."
"You'll all serve him, one day," Clockwork says, patiently. "He is the ruler of realms where all souls go, new and old. When you finally take refuge, he will be your sanctuary." He frowns. "But your government rejects the idea of gods. All they know is he is other. Not human. Not meta. A weapon."
"A weapon you want me to bring to my city."
"I believe you call one of your weapons 'Clark', do you not?" Clockwork asks idly. "But you misunderstand me. They seek to weaponize him. He is not restrained for your safety, but for their gain."
"And if I don't take him?" Bruce asks, because a) Clockwork has implied he will be at the very least impeded, at worst destroyed over this, and b) he never did quite learn not to poke the bear. "You won't be around if I decide he's better off with the government."
"You will," Clockwork says, with the same certainty he's wielded this entire conversation. "Not because he is a child, though he is, nor because you are good, though you are, nor even because it is better power be close at hand than afar.
"I have told you my court will be unhappy with me. In truth, there are others who also defend the King. Together we will destroy the access to our world not long after this conversation. The court will be unable to touch him, but neither will we as we face the repercussions for our actions. I am telling you this, because in a timeline where I do not, you think I will be there to protect him. And so when he is in danger, even subconsciously, you choose to save him last, or not at all. And that is the wrong choice.
"So cement it in your head, Bruce Wayne," the man says, "You will go to him because I tell you to. And you will keep him safe until he is ready to return to us. He will find no safety net in me. So you will make the right choice, no matter the cost."
"Or, when our worlds connect again, and they will," his voice now echoes in triplicate with the voices of the many, the young, the old, Tim, Bruce's mother, Barry Allen, Bruce's own voice, "I will not be the only one who comes for you."
"Now," he says, producing a Wayne Industries branded BIC pen. "I will tell you the location the boy is being kept, and then I would like my medallion back, please. In that order."
Bruce glances down and sees a golden talisman, attached to a black ribbon that is draped haphazardly around the neck of his bathrobe, so light (too light, he still should have—) he has not felt its weight until this moment.
Bruce flips the paper over, takes the pen, and jots down the coordinates the being rattles off over the face of a senator. By his calculation, they do correspond with a location in the midwest.
"You will find him on B6. Take a left down the hallway and he will be in the third room down, the one with a reinforced steel door. Take Mr. Kent and Mr. Grayson with you, and when you leave take the staircase at the end of the hallway, not the elevator."
The man gets up, dusts off his impeccably clean pants, and offers him a hand to shake.
"We will not meet again for some time, Mr. Wayne."
Bruce looks at the creature, stands, and shakes his hand. It feels like nothing. The Keeper of Time sighs, although nothing has been said.
"Ask your question, Mr. Wayne."
"I have more than one."
"You do," Clockwork says. "But I have heard them all, and so they are one. Please ask, or I will not be inclined to answer it."
"What does this boy mean for the future, that you are willing to sacrifice yourself for him?"
There is a pause.
"So that is the one," Clockwork says, after a time. "Yes. I see. I should resolve this, I suppose."
"Resolve what?"
"It is not his future I mean to protect," the man says. "It is his present."
"You want to keep him safe now..." Bruce says, but he's not sure what the being is trying to say.
"I am not inclined," Clockwork repeats, stops. His expression turns solemn, red eyes widening. In their reflection, Bruce can see something. A rush of movement too quick to make heads or tails of, like playing fast forward on a videotape. "Superman reports no signs of unusual seismic activity. With nothing further to look into, you let it go in favor of other investigative pursuits. You do not find him, as you are not meant to. He stays there. His family, his friends, they cannot find him. His captors tell him they have moved on. He does not believe them, until he does. He stays there. He stays there until he is strong enough to save himself."
Clockwork speaks stiffly, rattling off the chain of events as if reading a Justice League debrief. "He is King. He will always be King. He is strong, and good, and compassionate, and he is great for my people because yours have betrayed his trust beyond repair. He throws himself into being the best to ever Be, because there is nothing Left for him otherwise. We love him. We love him. We love him. My King. Forevermore."
The red film in his eyes stall out, and Bruce is forced to look away from how bright the image is, barely making out a silhouette before they dull back to their regular red.
"I am not inclined," Clockwork says slowly, "To this future."
"Because of what it means in the present," Bruce finishes for him. "They're not just imprisoning him, are they."
"They will have already muzzled him."
Clockworks is right in front of him faster than he can process, fist gripping the medallion at his neck so tight he now feels the ribbon digging into his skin.
"Unlike you, Mr. Wayne," and for the first time, the god is angry, and the image of it will haunt Bruce for the rest of his life, "I do not believe in building a better future on the back of a broken child."
"Find him," the deity orders, and yanks the necklace so hard the ribbon rips—
Clack!
"sluuuuurp!"
"Master Timothy, honestly!"
"Sorry Alfred!"
#i feel like I'm going to reread this and want to add other stuff#but I also just want to post it and get it out there#fun fact i scribbled a bunch of lines down at 2am bc i didn't want to forget them#im bad at multiple drafts#my writing#dp x dc#dp x dc au#dp x dc prompt#dp x dc crossover#danny phantom#batman#i live to make everybody dramatic#but also i subscribe to a world where clockwork doesn't know how NOT to be dramatic#lol he's a ghost from all of time he doesn't know how to speak to humans and tailor it to the century let alone the decade#and his favorite little girl who calls him clocky loves how he speaks so#he doesn't need to change for nobody#nor feels inclined to#also I feel like as god he's way more inclined to threaten to get what he wants than like...be vulnerable#jazz: let's unpack that#clockwork: we never do#jazz: are you saying that because it's true or because that's what you want to be true?#clockwork: ...#also I cannot take credit for BITCH I MIGHTWING#wish i could#that is cash money right there#shoutout to 11thsense
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You know I thought I was 100% on board with this ADHD diagnosis idea but I guess there was still a little doubt left over hidden inside this handful of green seedless grapes I pulled out of the pocket of the jeans I just put on
#I don't remember when I last bought grapes#I don't remember putting them in these jeans#The jeans were folded in my clean laundry#The grapes are fully intact#Why did I put grapes in my pocket#WHEN did I put grapes in my pocket#I live alone#These are definitely my jeans#What#I wish I was making this up why are there GRAPES IN MY PANTS
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Zen Garden - Four Seasons
#okay i know i know#its not perfect#i wish i was able to align it properly#but thats what i can do for now#i think it looks decent#oh also#this Autumn screenie will be posted later alone#bc i LOVE it so much#and i'm sorry for the quality of the shots here#bc i had to resize a lot so the shots looks similar#detroit become human connor#connor detroit become human#detroit rk800#detroit become human#detroit: become human#dbh#dbh rk800#dbh connor#connor dbh#dbh screenshots#d:bh#connor rk800#rk800#zen garden#detroit: bh
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how we feeling baers
#im not back i just needed to post this#if anything i think de has extended my social media break because... wdf was that hahaha#at least i got crumbs of chaseprice. there is hope for me and me alone#doodles#life is strange#lis#double exposure#double exposure spoilers#bae endings#chloe price#max caulfield#pricefield#contrary to popular opinion im not actually against the breakup. i just wish it had been executed in like ... ANY other way . ok see u guys
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it’s their’s to burn
sharing a cigarette with joan of arc - dante émile ( @orpheuslament ) // photography by brendon burton
#this poem punch anyone else in the grey matter or?#jk I fucking know it did#‘None of that matters when God has plans for you. I still love him I just wish he'd leave me alone.´#GRRR BARK BARK BARK#holyyy shit do you know what you’ve done to my psyche ??#words#edit#poetry edit#dante émile#joan of arc#sharing a cigarette with Joan of arc#aesthetic#aes#art#photograph#Brendan burton#western gothic#typography#typo#writing#h8#poem#Poet parlay
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#hell is a teenage girl#im just a girl#just girly things#female rage#cinnamon girl#gaslight gatekeep girlblog#this is what makes us girls#lana del rey#lana del ray aesthetic#girlblogger#coquette dollete#girlblogging#this is a girlblog#i have no friends#i hate school#female hysteria#pink angel core#girlcore#coquette#coquette angel#dollette#im so alone#sylvia plath#manic pixie dream girl#girl interupted syndrome#whisper girl#devine feminine#i wish i was an extrovert#i wish i wasnt like this#older man younger woman
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