#i will likely be the first trans person some of them will have ever met so. i have to do this right

[changingplumbob]

Chatting about Dating Deanna - Reece Edition

At Devin's insistence Deanna has agreed to take a trip to Thrift Tea or whatever it's called to let Devin try find her some outfits for the show. Not being a shopper herself she's convinced her best friend Reece to come along since they have similar fashion tastes.

Reece: I just can't believe you're actually doing it

Deanna: Yeah well, you've found your person haven't you. You seem happy. I want in on that. But not with you and Samir because ew. Do you want to see the pictures from the first lot of applications

Reece: I would but... you know I only like guys. I would just say they're all cute and have nothing else to offer. Talk to me once you've met them

Deanna: Deal

Devin: Oh! Oh! What about this one???

Deanna: Devin it's a dress. Try again

Reece: But you've worn dresses before. Like at prom

Deanna: I will wear some dresses if she insists but they have to be the fashion style I like

Devin: Don't worry De I am on it. Oh Luna, what do you think of this one for you? Gorgeous and pink

Deanna: Devin and Norah have been working on challenges for the contestants and honestly I'm a bit scared with their brains. Like are the people there to woo me or play survivor?

Reece: Well yeah but whoever wins will have to put up with Devin

Devin: HEY! I heard that and I'm fabulous

Reece: I just mean you've got her and Artemisia and Joey, they'll need to be able to handle your family

Deanna: True

Reece: I've been thinking about my contribution

Deanna: Okay genius, dazzle me

Reece: Joey was mumbling something about not being able to call households households because of something watcher related and I thought... give them group names!

Deanna: What?

Reece: For when they're in the villa with you. And you can name them... after robots! Because you like building robots

Deanna: That is the most geek idea I have ever heard

Reece: Yeah well I'm a young adult now, I've embraced being a geek

Devin: Ohhhhh! What about this one?

Reece: That dress does actually look nice

Deanna: *sighs* Since I like the colour I suppose I'll try it on

Devin: YES! Okay Lu see if you can find some matching shoes

Deanna: But Reece there won't be enough robot names for all the rounds so think of some other names options please. Less geeky ones would be great, I am not a geek after all

Reece: Maybe not but you are a tech head

Devin: De come on! Dress up time

Deanna: You know if being trans was a decision and not a state of being I'd be tempted to say Devin's constant dress up games when we were kids made Emisia a girl

7 spots available!

Dating Deanna - Contestant List, Challenge Overview, Joey's Contestant Creation Walkthrough, F.A.Q, All In Guide

[shr0mwzrd]

I'm convinced by the way y'all are acting about it that these alleged AFAB transfems don't exist outside your brains - like all y'all are just vaguing and pearl clutching without mentioning or linking to a single instance of this alleged atrocity. Even if they did exist, just block them and be normal for fucks sake. I'm so fucking tired of seeing these same bullshit takes over and over, especially from nominally leftist queers...do better

[wild-at-mind]

Really super loving that my haircut has unintentionally grown out into a style that the entire internet loves associating with horrible middle aged women. /s

[transmechanicus]

this is. probably a very personal question.

Is it worth it? Transitioning? In spite of it all?

Completely, utterly, and absolutely. I’m one of those ppl who knew i was trans since i was like 8. I found out when i was probably 13/14 what transgender meant, but recoiled from it because i could not imagine a world that would accept me or where i would be happy with the result. At 15 i met my first other trans person, and they became my friend and partner and the first person to ever know i was trans. Being around them, known by them, was such a colossal psychological relief and source of joy unlike anything i had known before. It made separating from them after graduation all the more excruciating to lose that one person i had trusted with that truth.

Sometime over the next two years i came out to my Mom, but nothing really changed, and i had more or less resolved to rot and die under the identity i had been born into. I let my undergrad studies chew me up, neglected all but the most necessary body maintenance, and spent every moment outside work or class buried in video games or books. At some point something snapped out of place, or perhaps back into place. I knew i didn’t want to die like this. I wanted something more for my life and my flesh than being a half dead servitor stocking yogurt. I wanted to transition, and however slowly, however long it took, that’s what i resolved to do.

It took a while. I had no real finances, no privacy, and little independence. I was coming from a white low-self-expression, high-control household. I “messed up” while base coating warhammer models one time and gave myself black nails. My dad berated me about it for days before trying to pin my hands down and sand the paint off (didn’t work, thank you automotive primer). When i was ~22 i got my ears pierced, basically the first permanent part of my transition, and i had never known as much joy as i did driving home knowing the pain was a step of permanent progress. Around this time 2019/2020 i started being out online, more vocal about being transgender as opposed to just having a relatively inexpressive fandom blog with no info beyond my name.

When i was 24, two years ago i came out to my dad, and a week later i left for grad school halfway across the country. I had an apartment all to myself, and my own source of income. I spent my spare change building up a wardrobe of new clothes that i actually liked. I got my first year of grad school done mostly without anything remarkable. Went to some queer events at my school. Found a partner. Got loved to bits for a while. Re-came out to my parents over the summer, and this time it stuck. Started HRT that fall, 2023. Came out to my classmates and coworkers and was rewarded with support and acceptance. Lost the partner. Devastated. Resolve to get even hotter and cooler. Smash out 3 piercings and a tattoo inside a week. Develop personal fashion sense. Attend research conference. Get better at makeup. Go to some concerts. Increase HRT. Tiddy Arc. Buy bra with a supportive bestie. Start weekly therapy. Increase HRT. Cosplay at a major convention. Schedule another tattoo. More HRT. Bra no longer optional. Present day. Tattoo on Wednesday. 90% of progress packed into the last year or so. Undeniably hotter, happier, and more self-expressive than anything in the last 24 years prior.

Transitioning is more than worth it, it brings me so much relief and joy every day no matter how shitty my day is otherwise, and while i have known doubt, i have never for an instant known regret.

There is still time🖤🏳️‍⚧️💕

[genderqueerdykes]

i met some new trans folks through a mutual friend who sounded like they may have room for me at their new place. while getting to know each other, one of them posted a selfie, and then asked to see one of me. after posting mine, this person asked for my agab as opposed to my identity. they asked me "afab on T?" and i never felt so angry and uncomfortable in my life. it's one thing to be asked that by cis people, but another trans person, it feels like getting hit with a brick

i let them know that i'm intersex and that in my ultrasounds and up to and shortly after my birth, i was confidently announced to be amab, then something caused that to change, then puberty hit and any chance at fitting into amab or afab went out the window.

this made me feel like they looked at my body and tried to figure out what i 'originally was' or 'started out as'. it made me feel like they "assessed" me for what kind of genitals i have. as if that was important information on how to treat or assess me, or had anything to do with how i identify. it made me feel objectified, like a piece of meat.

it made me feel dysphoric for the first time in years. it made me feel like i was being shoved into the binary i've been trying to escape all over again. i felt like i was being shoved in to one of two strict categories that i didn't want to be placed in.

even if this weren't the case and i weren't intersex, this would still be an extremely invasive and disgusting question to ask another trans person before you even know how they identify. trans people should never do this to other trans people. please do not ever ask this of anyone unless they are willingly offering up information about their agab or offer to tell you first.

this is not how we should treat each other.

this will never be okay, intersex, trans, or cis. never ask a stranger about their genitals. EVER. casual transphobia and intersexism will never be okay. learn to spot it when you see it, and eradicate it on sight.

[archangeldyke-all]

trans sevy getting her first blowjob ever from reader? feeling so confident, beautiful, and desired in her own skin because of the safe and genuine love her and reader have for each other 🥺

:,) i love her

men and minors dni

you wake up to your limbs tangled with sevika's.

you and your girlfriend fell asleep a few hours ago, naked and satisfied after a mid-afternoon romp. you have nowhere to be, so you indulge in the feeling of sevika's gentle snores against your throat.

you two have been trying to take things slow. you've only been having sex for a few weeks, but you've been going on dates two or three times a week, spending the night at each other's homes, and bickering like an old married couple for half a year now.

it's not like you weren't insanely attracted to each other upon meeting.

but you were able to see the walls she puts up to protect herself from a mile away, and you fell in love with the glimpses of the gentle woman behind them; so you decided to wait.

to wait until she felt comfortable enough to sleep on top of you like she is now, drooling a little on your shoulder; until she was relaxed enough to let you touch her gently and tell you what she likes; until she trusted you enough to let you see her naked, both physically and emotionally.

and it's been so fucking worth it.

you've never been in love like this before. you can't control the smile that comes to your face as your chest is flooded with affection for your girl, and you wrap your arms just a little tighter around her back, craning your neck to kiss the top of her head.

"hmph?" sevika asks.

"hey, sleepy head." you chuckle.

"hm. i'll give you some sleepy head." she jokes, cracking her eyes open to smile up at you.

you burst into laughter, squeezing her in a tight hug as she starts pressing chaste kisses over your chest.

"i wouldn't be opposed to that." you giggle. "wouldn't be opposed to givin' you some sleepy head either."

sevika freezes on top of you, and you have to hide your amused smile in her hair.

it breaks your heart a bit; the way sevika's so clearly never been loved properly before. it's humbling and empowering to be the first person to love her, and sometimes, it's also a little comical. she's just so easy to fluster.

"sev?" you whisper.

"uh..." she gulps, lifting her head up to blink down at you owlishly. "we've never done that before." she says.

"no, we haven't."

"do you... would you... i mean i don't want you to do anything you don't wan--"

"sevika." you cut her off, gently pressing your fingers to her lips. "i've been dreaming about tasting you since we met. i'd be fuckin' honored. but only if you're into it."

sevika gulps. you can see her hesitation and her arousal warring in her mind, her cock starting to stiffen against your hip. you just cup her face in your hands, peppering her with kisses and waiting for her response.

"d-do you know how?" she asks. you snort.

"i know the basics. lick, suck, slobber. teeth are a no-no."

sevika snorts a bit, her lower lip between her teeth as she considers your offer. you can tell she wants it, she's just struggling with saying it. so, you try speaking her language.

one gentle hand on her shoulder is all it takes to push her off of you and onto the mattress. you straddle her hips, hovering over her quickly hardening cock and grinning down at her as she ogles your tits swaying in her face.

you bend down, guiding one of sevika's hands to your tits, the other to your hips, before you press your lips to hers.

the tension in her body quickly melts, and she sighs in relaxation. her hands start moving up and down your body on their own accord, groping and clawing freely, taking her fill of you.

"lemme make you feel good sev, huh?" you ask. she gulps beneath you, trying to tug your hips down so you sit on her cock.

"i want you." sevika whines.

"well, i know that, baby. what part of me do you want? i'll give you anything... my tits... my hands... my cunt..." sevika gulps, waiting for you to mention your initial offer. you grin down at her, raising your eyebrow as she squirms.

"y-your mouth." she whispers.

you grin and swoop down to kiss your girlfriend. "good girl." you praise. sevika shivers underneath you at the words and you giggle, before you drop the teasing act and start kissing down her body. "gonna be good for me and use your words?" you ask, licking a ring around her belly button. sevika's abs twitch, and her cock twitches where it rests on her thigh.

"y-yes."

"good." you kiss her hip.

you start slow, not wanting to overwhelm her. you can tell she's equally excited and nervous, and you want her to melt into her pleasure and forget her worries.

you quickly blow into your palm, warming it just a bit before wrapping it around sevika's cock. she sighs sweetly as you start jerking her off.

you've never been so close to her cock before. usually, you're jerking her off under her pants on the couch, or quickly guiding her cock toward your cunt. you've never had a chance to study it like this before.

"shit, sev, your dick's so pretty." you huff. she laughs, a little self consciously, and you nip her thigh.

"can a cock be pretty?" she asks.

you nod. "when it looks like yours." she's already leaking pre into your hand, making the motions of your hands glide. uncircumsized, girthy, seven inches (according to sevika, though to you it feels a lot closer to nine)-- she's a work of art. "sev..." you mutter, hypnotized by the sight of her. "can i taste you, baby?"

she shudders. you reach up and grab her hands, lifting them both to your head so she can control the pace. "y-yes please."

you sigh, turning your head just a bit to kiss her wrist. "i love you, sevika." you remind her. she whimpers, and you smile at the sound.

"i love you, t--shit!" sevika gasps as you lick one long, solid stripe up her cock.

fuck. she's hot and firm under your tongue, you can feel her blood pulsing in her cock, and the taste of her is divine. salty, a little sweet, and entirely sevika. it's like burying your nose in her neck and inhaling, but so much better.

better, because above you, sevika's voice has risen two octaves, little squeaks and mewls escaping her as she twitches and squirms.

"f-fuck!" she whimpers. you grin, and then kiss the head of her dick.

"tell me what you like." you whisper.

sevika gulps. "i-i dunno." she whines. "i like your mouth."

you laugh, then kiss her dick again. "alright. we'll figure it out together. do you like this:" you lean forward and lick another long line up the underside of her cock. "or this?" you gently place her tip on your tongue, closing your lips around her and sucking, just a bit.

sevika nearly jumps off the bed when you get your lips around her. "that!" she gasps, her hands clawing at your scalp. "that, that, that!"

you hum a laugh around her, and her thigh starts to quiver uncontrollably around you.

when you pull away, a string of spit connects your lower lip to her cock. she collapses against the bed, groaning. "fuuuuuck."

you laugh. "this?" you duck down, nuzzling your face against her wet cock, drunk enough on the sounds of her pleasure to disregard the sticky wetness spreading on your cheeks and eyelashes. "or this?" you nuzzle the tip of your nose at the base of her cock, right above her balls.

your hot breath on her balls makes her squeal in laughter as she tries to grind against your face. "b-both!" she giggles.

you grin at the sound, and kiss the base of her cock. "mmm, good to know." you duck down just a little further. "this?" you mouth at her balls, her pubes tickling your face. when you lick your tongue out, sevika's cock jumps so hard you think she's about to cum. she doesn't-- but a little stream of pre drips down her dick tantalizingly. fuck, you can't wait to taste her cum.

"or this?" you ask. you've been doing a lot of sex research, scrolling through lgbt forums and blogs while fantasizing about your girlfriend, trying to learn how to make her feel good. you've read that she might like it when you start licking and nuzzling against the soft skin under her balls, but you were skeptical.

you had no fucking reason to be skeptical.

the second you push your mouth against the soft, fuzzy skin under her balls, sevika gasps, scrambling to sit up and pushing your face away from her.

"w-what happened, you okay!?" you ask, panicked and worried about your gasping girlfriend.

she's staring at you with big, sparkling eyes, a wide goofy smile on her face. "i-i didn't wanna cum in your hair." she whispers with a giggle.

you grin. "you're so fuckin' sweet." you sigh, kissing sevika's thigh. "now cum down my throat."

sevika growls when you take her down your mouth as deep as you can.

you only manage to get about half her cock down. still, she doesn't seem to care.

"shit, baby, fuck, your mouth's so fuckin' perfect, oh my god, i love you so much, shit, shit, i love you baby, i love you, t-thank you, i-- b-baby i'm gonna cum!" she cries.

you hum and nod around her, blinking up at her as you do.

the second your eyes meet, sevika starts shooting ropes of hot cum down your throat.

you sputter a little, pulling back to make enough room for her load but not letting go of the tip of her cock, sucking her dry as she whimpers and cries into the back of her hand.

it's only when she starts to weakly shoo you away with her hand that you pull off of her cock.

she blinks down at you and you smirk, sticking your tongue out to show her how she's filled your mouth before swallowing it with a pleased hum.

sevika groans, then gently smacks you with a throw pillow.

"this is gonna be a huge fuckin' problem." she whispers.

your stomach sinks again. "what? why?" you ask, crawling up her body to hover over her.

she blinks up at you shyly, and your concern melts. she's flustered, not uncomfortable, and you allow a cocky smirk to spread on your lips. "'cause i don't think 'm gonna be thinkin' about anything besides getting my dick in your mouth for the rest of my life!" she whines.

you burst into laughter and collapse on top of your girlfriend, nuzzling against her neck and kissing her intermittently. "you said the same thing the first time we fucked, babe." you laugh.

sevika just huffs beneath you, hiding her blush from you by tucking her face down to kiss the top of your head.

taglist!

@fyeahnix @lavendersgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner

@shimtarofstupidity @chuucanchuucan @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther

@ellsss @sevikaspillowprincess @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai

@glass-apothecary @macaroni676 @artinvain @realgreeniebeanie @k3n-dyll

@sevsdollette @ellieslob

[batboyblog]

How concerned do you think we should be about people who may not want to vote for a Harris-Shapiro ticket? Personally I think he’d be a great choice for VP, but I am worried about people who would smear him because of Gaza. I’ve read up on how his own views on it have changed and how he supports a two-state solution like pretty much any other Democrat and how he is against Netanyahu, but you just know how misinformation that appeals to people’s biases can stick.

well first off I don't think we should worry till we have a VP pick (statements that will be dated very soon) we don't know who Vice President Harris will pick, it might be Governor Shapiro, it might be Pete Buttigieg, Mark Kelly, Tim Walz, or Andy Beshear, and I think they're all great, all good picks, all worthwhile.

On Josh Shapiro himself, I've seen an alarming amount of, disinformation, lies, misinformation, and twisting about him, indeed over the weekend one of the most aggressive attempts to ratfuck a person in such a short period of time I've ever seen. I can't say for sure where it came from but it was an impressive weekend for misinformation, with a trans panic about a cisgender boxer in the Olympics and anti-immigrant race riots in the UK targeting muslims about an attack carried out by a British born teen. Both cases as it turns out go back to Russian misinformation (Boxer, Race Riot) Just something to keep in mind as we watch fake and misleading stories about Democratic elected officials pop up.

Any ways on Shapiro himself, He has a very progressive record, his views on Israel are the same as everyone else on the short list, and indeed Kamala Harris views too. In some ways as a Jewish politician he's felt more comfortable criticizing Israel and Netanyahu than Goyish politicians, there's a good article about this:

if someone is willing to vote for Harris with any other VP, but not Shapiro, even though he has the same views on Israel as the rest, and indeed none of them have called Netanyahu "one of the worst leaders of all time", well they just have a problem with a Jewish VP.

I'm not overly worried about it TBH, antisemitism is a huge turn off to normal voters, but its up to everyone normal to dismiss it and keep trucking.

I don't know who Kamala Harris will pick, but if its Josh Shapiro, I'll be thinking about this news story from 1986 every time he comes up:

Before he was 13 years old Josh Shapiro formed a national organization to fight to free a friend he'd never met before in person from an evil empire, and they did.

[dervampireprince]

[dni minors, dni blogs that have no 18+ age listed in their bio] astarion x trans man! reader/tav /// smut, dysphoria comfort, reader's chest is un-described and untouched, reader has a vulva, soft dom top astarion, bottom reader

whenever there's a day when you feel off, wrong, you're hyper aware of your body and how it doesn't feel right to you, he'll notice. perhaps not at first, but the way your posture is different, the way you reject and shy away from his touch, don't flush or scowl at his flirting.

it's late when he decides he has to ask you what's wrong, him not being used to having others to care about, to worry for.

"have i done something wrong?" his voice is quiet and yet it startles you from your thoughts.

"no? no, of course no," guilt festers in you. "i'm sorry."

"there's no need to apologise, darling. as i've been told by someone quite dear to me, there's nothing wrong with not wanting to be touched."

"it's not that. i do, i," you breathe. "i want you to touch me quite badly."

"then i don't understand."

his fingers twitch, wanting to reach for you as your eyes flicker to the mirror across the room.

"when you look at me... what do you see? that is, i mean... you could have anyone you wanted, and i know what you'll say to that. and i believe you. that you want me. i just, sometimes it's hard thinking about the men you've been with, hells just men in general, and then... how they compare to... me. because sometimes, sometimes it's hard to see myself as... as..."

you trail off, aware of your shaking breath, aware of the wetness on your eyelashes, aware that you want to bury yourself against him but find yourself scared.

just as you start to wonder if you've ruined something, his hands hover by your face, not touching, waiting. and so you nod, and his he cups his palms against your cheeks, tilting your head to look at him.

"my sweet boy."

those words and his voice make everything the smallest bit better, you hold back a sob and place your head into the crook of his neck. him calling you a boy both soothing and comforting, but also always slightly arouses you.

"you know i love you? exactly as you are, because of who you are."

"i know."

he raises one of your hands to his lips and kisses it.

"would you let me show you?"

he's not used to being so careful with someone else, not that he hasn't been gentle before but it's never been out of his own desire to cherish the person he's with. but perhaps he can understand, in his own way, feeling disconnected to your own body.

"you're such a handsome man, such a pretty boy. and aren't i ever so lucky. when i was a child i would fantasize about some dashing prince, but i could have never imagined i'd find one like you. you're far lovelier than any dream. you're real. and for some unknown reason managed to see something good in me. you're the most incredible person i've ever met, and i'm going to help you see that."

your shirt stays on if you wish it, as much as he loves every inch of your body, and will continue to regardless of if it stays as it is, or if parts of it change. but he wants you to be comfortable.

he kisses you, trailing down from your lips to your neck, never meaning to get carried away there but always does. you find it hard to mind though as he kisses, teeth nipping but not drinking, leaving faint little marks. he likes leaving marks on you, a reminder that you're here, that you're proud to be with him.

his hands slide down your sides, over your stomach, they pull at the laces of your trousers, sliding them off you legs, leaving your bottom half bare, waiting for his attention.

you flush as he maintains eye contact with you as he slides a hand under your ankle, then down your leg as his mouth moves with it, kissing you calf, next to your knee, up your thigh. and if there's more to grab there, he reveals in it, adoring any curves, your softness. he pauses when he reaches the top of your thigh and chuckles, smirks to himself

"such a sensitive boy, i haven't even touched you anywhere intimate yet and look," you gasped as he glides a couple of fingers between your folds and then holds them up. "already wet for me."

he slides his fingers back against you, teasing around you before thrusting in, curling them upwards as he lowers his head.

"we can'tbe neglecting your cock can we darling? it's straining so hard. and just because it looks different than mine, doesn't make it less of a cock, does it?"

he stays blinking up at you until he realise he wants an answer and you shake your head no.

"good boy, that's right," he purrs and you want to feel condescended, but you just whine, flushing hot, wanting to be good for him, wanting to be his good boy, wanting him to call you that again. "and what shall we do with your pretty cock? shall i suck you off?"

you nod your head, eyes pleading with him and he laughs, not to make fun of you, but because your neediness, your eagerness for him endears him.

"very well then," his lips close around your cock, sucking and suctioning while his fingers continue to stroke inside you, your hands slip into his hair and tug accidentally and he moans around you.

"cheeky boy," he pulls back. "do you wish to come like this or..."

"fuck me," you say, and then. "please? please, astarion, i need you."

astarion always flushes when you tell him you need him. he slides up your body, "i suppose i shouldn't tease, you've been deprived of my touch all week, my poor boy thinking he didn't deserve this. don't worry, i'll fuck you like need."

his cock slips between you, holding you close, kissing your neck, hands stroking your waist as he pushes inside of you,

"that's it, such a good boy. always taking me so well," he loses control of his voice as he fucks you, murmuring praises as his hips snap against you, letting you tug him up to kiss you, pressing one of your hands down into the pillow so he can hold it.

he tells you that you're a good as you both come, he tells you that you're a good boy as you twitch, oversensitive, as he cleans you off, and he tells you that you're a good boy as you drift off in his arms.

[pachimation]

redrawing my very first chiscara comic/art i ever did for chscr day!!

old comic under the cut!!

lol a bunch of sappy semi serious stuff below bc i cant help but be a bit genuine about this ship today :’3

i cant possibly put into words how important this silly little ship and its community mean to me haha,,,, this comic was made in 2021 but i didnt really get serious about chscr until late 2022 after a bunch of pretty bad interpersonal stuff happened and i needed an outlet,, COINCIDENTALLY a certain someone was announced to be playable around then and i was already thought chscr was Pretty Neat™️ so i ended up diving headfirst into the ship. it also gave me a good excuse to work on more comics too!! i’d done a pretty big zhongven comic earlier that year in the summer, but in terms of lore there was only so much i could have worked with at the moment.

childe and scaramouche have that perfect combination of silliness and angst and violence that could be explored or expanded in so many ways and i love love love seeing other people’s interpretations of their dynamic and relationship. they’re so complex,,,,they’re narrative foils,,,they’re narrative parallels,,,they’re trans allegories,,,they’re flies in the spiderweb of the games lore,,,they’re my stupid little meow meows,,, they’re just two losers i want to see make out,,,

in a nutshell, they’re everything to me. well, i hope i get that kind of sentiment across in my own comics,,,,

and i cant get started on all the people ive met through chiscara or the way that having something i can call “my thing”, as in, the thing that i like and that i will spend a lot of time and effort (and money, but lets not talk about that) to surround myself with because it makes me smile. its stupid to say, but being a nerd about these two stupid guys who have never had a single canon onscreen interaction in some random game has made me a much happier and confident person that i could have ever imagined back in my freshman year of college,,, when i say i dont know who i’d be if i hadnt gotten into chiscara, i really do mean it lol

i’m actually surprised i’m making it to over a full year of regular-ishly making art, especially for the same game and ship! thats never happened before and my art has improved so much over this past year!! more than anything else, i’m happy! i get to be excited talking about these characters with my friends and i love to see art of them pop up on the tl. i make stickers of them and decorate my phonecase with them and have little figures of them in my room that i look at when im up late at night working on schoolwork. sometimes just the thought of finishing a comic or daydreaming about a scenario or seeing what my mutuals are up to are some of the few things getting me through a tough day.

,,,,so believe me when i say, to both childe and scara and to everyone else as obsessed with these pathic losers as i am, thank you! i’m having a lot of fun!!!

(also i just found out tumblrs copy/paste doesnt work on my ipad??? idk if this ends up legible i may or may not have deleted smth by accident and im not in a mood to proofread haha)

[carlyraejepsans]

mind if i get sappy both negatively and positively for a sec?

if you've been following me for a while you'll remember just last year when i was still in highschool and i was so, so lonely and this blog was getting more popular than i meant for it to be. i was a wreck. i had straight up nightmares about hypothetical call outs and people taking my words out of context to turn people against me and that I'd lose the few people i genuinely thought of as friends. i used to go over my old posts deleting them and obsessively editing the wording when i felt it could be twisted to mean something else. even worrying that the fact they COULD have a double meaning meant i was secretly a horrible person in some sick freudian sense. not a good time to have moral OCD! or anon asks open, lmfao.

and i look at my past self now, after my biggest fear realized so many times it's now a monthly annoyance at worst and well. of course i did. i had no one else! that was the extent of my friendships at the time. the people i met and came to love online were the only place i felt truly safe to be myself around without having to fight for my right to be respected or putting on a persona.

but guess what? that's not the case anymore. I'm out of my parents' house, i have authority over my own decisions and presentation, i have friends at school (real friends! more than I've ever had simultaneously in my life!) that enjoy my company in person and include me in the things they do, fully respecting my chosen name and identity as a trans person. i have a queer community to share my burdens and my joys with, i am finally, finally getting started on HRT which is a dream I thought I'd never reach... and guess what. even my online friends didn't give a fuck. i was so paranoid about being alone again that i forgot to consider that they... also care about me, just like i care about them. that they're not gonna dump me out of nowhere because some random asshole decided i was their parasocial nemesis of the week, and if they had doubts or questions wbout something, we could discuss it in private and either agree or agree to disagree on friendly terms.

idk I'm just doing the best I've ever done in my life. this period of my life is perhaps the first time I've ever felt like a complete and whole person. it gets me a little tender hearted looking back and seeing how much I've grown since the time "something like this" would've been world ending.

anyway if any of this rings familiar to you, know I'm proud of you as well. in the way you've grown AND in the way you will grow, given time. hold the line, soldier. things get getter. that's a promise.

[khaire-traveler]

As a devotee of Demeter, I sometimes feel that people only worship Persephone for the aesthetic.

I feel horrible for saying and thinking that but I can't help but feel that way. Certain pagans portray Persephone as some overpowered Mary Sue, downplaying the importance of her mother and sometimes even her husband.

I feel like people really ignore her as a agrarian deity. They claim to love her but feel the need to change everything about her - if you need to change her did you ever like her in the first place?

It honestly just feels like they're talking about a Wattpad main character instead of a religious figure at times it's so jarring to me. Imagine if someone on tiktok described their deity as a dark and daddy figure bad boy with piercings and then its literally just Jesus Christ.

And its not just Persephone, it's the whole pantheon! Some worshippers talk about the deities and their myths like characters and tropes from a telenovela. They are rarely treated like religious figures, they are more than just their myths.

Im sorry i just wanted a place to complain and see if i am not alone

---

Khaire, Nonny,

Honestly, I agree with this sentiment. I've seen this time and time again where Persephone, and many other deities, get "fandomized" which can be problematic for others, even if it's ok in that individual's practice. Sometimes it feels like our religion isn't taken seriously, even by the people who actively practice it, but I also understand that people have different forms of practicing that work better for them. It's frustrating, however, when Persephone is depicted as this Mary Sue characterization of her where she's seen as, like, super edgy, badass, and powerful in a really fandomized way. It comes across as this person using Persephone as an avenue of self-expression rather than worshipping who she actually is as a deity (not to say she's not badass or powerful, to clarify). While it's ok to use a deity as an avenue for self-expression in worship (some trans folk, for example, view Apollon as trans-masc, and it actively plays a role in their worship), it's a lot less ok when you're making this deity into a cartoonish characterization of themselves. The gods present themselves differently to people, but I don't know; I guess I find it far-fetched to believe that Persephone would present herself in this sort of way. I can't speak for her, obviously, but I just disagree with this interpretation of who she is as a deity - putting herself above others, hating her mom, being a rebellious "wild child". I think that, psychologically speaking, some people might just find comfort in this representation of her and see themselves in it which is likely why they gravitate towards it. It's fine to have that experience, but I STRONGLY encourage these people to actually read the myths about Persephone, do the research on how she was worshipped, and actively try to better understand where she actually came from as a deity because this isn't just a character in a show that you relate to; this is a goddess that you're trying to worship, no?

Some people finding more success in their practice with this representation doesn't negate the harm these misconceptions and misinformation can cause. I've met multiple people who believe that Persephone willingly fled to the Underworld to "escape" Demeter (which is untrue), and that is endlessly frustrating to me, especially due to the cultural importance of the Hymn to Demeter (the myth of Persephone being kidnapped). The gods are not their myths, in my experience, but their myths still hold a heavy importance in the way they were worshipped in the past, and the way we worship them in the present. Demonizing an entire deity is the equivalent of trying to cancel a constellation of stars; it's pointless, extremely bizarre, and very "online" behavior.

But yeah, I think some people care more about the "character" than they do the deity, and I will say that confidently. I've met people who "ship" deities with each other, who make their experiences with deities sound - as you said - like a telenovela, and who actively spread harmful misinformation about deities in a way that legitimately disgusts and disturbs me. I've once had someone tell me that a deity [insert reprehensibly immoral act here] them, and to this day, I still cannot believe they said that to me when I was a beginner, just to dissuade me from worshipping that deity. The lengths some people will go to drag a deity is honestly both sad and ridiculous.

I wish some people took the religion more seriously in the sense that they didn't just make random shit up about deities, actively disrespect and disregard the culture the deities stem from, and demonize some deities while bolstering others. It shows a level of immaturity and indifference towards the culture these deities come from. It's not a fandom; it's a way of worship.

---

✨ Bonus round!! ✨

Some ridiculous things I've heard people say that sound like a fandom and/or telenovela (I will put the phrases in "" to express that these are things I've heard, not things I'm saying or believe in):

"Hermes and Aphrodite constantly gossip to each other about the other gods. No one fucks with Hermes because he knows everyone's dirty laundry."

"Ares is starting a revolution on Mount Olympus against Zeus to take the throne." (Yes, I have really heard this)

"Hermes is starting a revolution on Mount Olympus against Zeus to take the throne." (Yes, I have really heard this, too)

"XYZ deity has done [insert reprehensibly immoral and highly traumatic act here] to me."

"I caught XYZ deity cheating on their spouse in the astral realm, and I'm going to tell their spouse."

"The reason the gods haven't been communicating as much lately is because Hades ran away from Mount Olympus (?) and Hekate is going after him. Everyone is panicking a little bit."

"Zeus is such a playboy." (Bruh, do you really have beef with a thousands of years old god who came from an extremely patriarchal society? What, are you trying to cancel him?)

"Poseidon is such a playboy." (Now this take is wild; I don't really understand where it came from at all)

"Apollo is such an UwU 👉👈 shy boy! He's so cute and flustered all the time." (???)

"Persephone has a lot of emotional trauma from Demeter, who was extremely controlling." (No. No for so, so many reasons.)

"Apollo is a himbo."

People say the darnedest things. You really have to wonder what possesses someone to talk about religious figures in such a way, but you know what, if it works for their practice, then good for them. I'm not a big fan of the fandomization of the gods, and I definitely agree with you, Nonny. I won't say these people don't love these deities, but I can understand where you're coming from. It feels like they love the deities in an obsessive fan type of way sometimes, but that's not for me to say, really.

[marksbear2]

COOPER ‘THE GHOUL’ HOWARD X MALE READER

Headcanons!!

I really recommend watching fallout, I’ve been so in love with it and especially my man Cooper.

Warnings!! ⚠️ Some headcanons will include smut!! It’ll be a mix of fluff and smut!!! And some will before the nuke. Includes Gn, FTM of Afab reader, and male reader. ⚠️

— He has a hate and love relationship with you whenever you mock his accent. It really throws him off during a argument. It makes him lose his thought process.

— When your not doing it in a middle of a argument he finds it cute and attractive. He starts chuckling and smiling like some teenage girl.

— He threatens you sometimes saying he’ll tie you up and leave you for dead or raiders or scavengers to find and kill. 

— He’s been protective of you even before doomsday. He hates anyone even standing to close to you, or when you help survivors.

— Often puts his cowboy hat on you and tells you the ‘Cowboy hat rule’ and you fall for it every time

— You and him making out while his bounty is on the floor tied up. You and him disappearing off somewhere leaving the bounty just to come back with clothes a mess and wrinkly with either you or him with a limp or wiping the corners of yours mouths.

— Him manhandling and being rough with his bounties to show off to you and to get you jealous.

— He often called you inside his dressing room to make out one last time before he went out and got on camera or two have a quick fuck trying to stay quiet so no one hears.

— He kisses you during an argument to shut you up. 

— He really has a small temper and accidentally says something either hurtful or goes off on. He apologizes by going on his knees and taking your hands apologizing with his accent.

— When having sex and he gets all overstimulated he whines and his thick southern accent becomes all cracky and whining becoming completely pathetic.

— He loves it when you become out of no where dominant. 

— He secretly gets off to you just holding his lasso or any type of rope. He himself doesn’t know why it turns him on so much at the sight.

— When he’s being the dominant one he would humiliate you with his harsh and cold words forcing you to accept them and sometimes when he wants you to repeat them for him. Telling you what you are.

— Him finding a cowboy hat not exactly like his but it’s something as you two walk around in the wasteland in cool cowboy survivor like outfits.

— Really good with his fingers. 

— You probably found him first after the nuke and such looking at the damages to the his body and skin. You comforted him for years telling him that he’s still the handsome dashing movie star Cooper you first met.

— He really hates when you two have to spilt ways, even if it was for months or the smallest a day or hour. He really is attached to you and wants to be at your side every second wanting to make sure your okay. He wants to the one to protect you.

— Since you two are living in the apocalypse he rarely sees you completely lean. So the first time he saw you without dust, or blood or dust he fell in love with you all over again. Touching your body carefully and worshipping you and also like some damn dog rubbing his hard on against you.

NOW VAULTER AND TRANS (FTM) AND AFAB READER.

— If you were a vaultie he often called you it and makes fun of your outfit. He treats you exactly what he thinks of the vaulters. 

— He was the first person in years, ever since you got in the vault to have sex with. It was like losing your virginity all over again just to now some bounty hunter.

— Duding a argument he always has this one like that “Your a vaultie, you wouldn’t understand.” He knows it pisses you off but he doesn’t care especially during an argument but at the end of it he always feel regret.

— He lasso’s and drag you you around since your a vaultie and doesn’t trust you enough to be in the Outland by yourself.  He treats you like some newborn baby.

— The first time you two met you two were always going back and forth over and over to the point you got him so angry he shoved you down and forced you on your knees and fucked you right there in the outside in the middle of the open it wasn’t like anyone would see. But you were fresh out of the vault and hadn’t had sex in forever you had orgasm and orgasm he felt like the king of the world.

— He helps you with dysphoria by finding the most masculine clothes he finds off the people he kills and gives it to you as some sort of gift. 

— Doesn’t hesitate for a second and shot someone the moment they misgender you went off their tongue shooting them right in the chest then head.

— He would wrap your chest with bandages.

— Whenever your feeling down he would and very willing to eat you out whenever he can. He would bury his face in it licking and sucking your clit while he fingers you like his life dependent on it. He wouldn’t even care about his own pleasure and only focused on you. He calls your clit your cock and loves to suck it. 

— He loves seeing his cock move in and out of your pussy, he loves rubbing it against it. Always promises just to do the tip but ends up slipping it all inside. He fucks you while rubbing your clit and loves getting you all wet and excited to make you put your clothes back in.

— He would stay up all night comforting you whenever you have second thoughts about being a man.

THE END

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA… my crush threw up when she saw my scars.

I (22ftm) have intense feelings for my friend (24 f ), we’ll call her Bee. For some background I met her through my job (we’re in the food industry). I’m have a big friend group and my crush use to work with everyone. Bee use to actually date someone within the friend group, Sandy (24 f). They’re still friends even tho they’re broken up.

I hangout with my work friend group a lot, and Bee sometimes will come along. I like Bee a lot because she’s just really cool, she’s always calm, she talks about anything and everything, and she’s beautiful. She even is working as a heating and cooling technician. It’s hard for her to hangout with all of us because she has so many other things going on in general. She even bough a house in this economy!

Sandy and Bee are still close friends. I’ve asked a Sandy about their relationship and if she’s over her, and Sandy basically just tells me they were both kids and have dated other people since breaking up.

I haven’t actually gotten the chance to hangout with Bee one on one. I’ll even invite her to hangout with our group, but most the time she’s either busy with her house, or her other friends/family/business trips/etc. At first I thought she was lying, but Sandy has told me Bee just does a lot in general now. I’ve invited her to see a few scary movies with me, but she’s turned down 3/3.

This is where I may have been the asshole for making Bee uncomfortable. I had gotten my top surgery (whoo hoo) and after some recovering I kinda wanted to celebrate. Our other mutual friend was throwing a game night and I asked if Bee was coming and if she could come. Our friend said that’s fine since Bee is cool, and I invited Bee and she said she’d love to. She showed up with her boyfriend. I know it sounds bad, I just wanna get closer to Bee in general, her and I don’t have to date (although I wouldn’t mind).

Anyway during the game night, Sandy and Bee went to a separate bedroom to talk. I did pretend to go to the bathroom to ease drop. Bee was just basically telling Sandy she’s been stressed about work and her family, and redoing her house (she and her bf are doing the work themselves) Sandy basically just offered to help and Bee was just like “oh you listening is more than enough!” And they kinda just talked a little more. I was kinda feeling betrayed by Sandy, I haven’t told Sandy I really wanna get closer to Bee, she probably knows tho, but she never offers any help on how I could get closer.

When the two got out I raised a toast to my top surgery and to just making my body feel more like me, and to thank all my friends for the love and support I’ve received through them. I took off my shirt to show off, and I immediately noticed Bee looked away.

Throughout the night I would try and talk to Bee, but she wouldn’t make eye contact with me. she was keeping the conversation short Was she afraid to sexualize me? Was she transphobic? Her boyfriend even got between us and tried asking me how I’m doing and was kinda being a block. My mind was racing and I just kinda grabbed her hand and said “Does this scare you?”. She cried out “sorry!” And ran away…and she threw up in the sink. She started crying and apologizing and Sandy and her bf kinda took her to the bathroom then the car. Bee came in said sorry to everyone for ruining the night, and like three people said “no you just go home and feel better”.

I watched Sandy talk to both Bee and her boyfriend for like 20 minutes “saying goodbye”. I was shocked by the whole thing. It finally took someone to ask me if I was okay. I asked if Bee was trans phobic, why wouldn’t she look at me, she never hangs out with me one on one. Everyone told me that Bee isn’t transphobic (gee thanks). One of my friends even said I shouldn’t have grabbed Bee like that, which I know now. She was just acting all weird around me, and she was what I thought the coolest person ever.

Sandy came back in, she was laughing and she told the group Bee was fine. I asked “what about me!?” Sandy basically explained “body stuff” makes Bee “queasy”. i was hurt and offended that no one cared about me or my feelings.

Later that night Bee called me to apologize. She offered to buy me lunch. I was still hot headed and asked how my scars make her throw up. She basically told me about an event in her life that does make her uncomfortable around blood/scars/etc. I asked if she supported trans rights. she said of course. I asked her if she would ever date me, and she said shes never thought about it because shes with her bf. i basically confessed my feelings which she did not return but wishes me luck.

We never got lunch. I feel weird reaching out to her. she hasn't stopped by the restaurant. She hasn't come to a group gathering since. i know her and Sandy still hangout which pissed me off. i tried talking to my "friend" about it, but they say it as a step too far. they also shame me for crushing on her (i was fine with just friendship).

Its been like two months and everyone is still weird about it. Every time i bring it up, everyone makes me the bad guy. was i the asshole? was Sandy or Bee or even my friends that didnt support me?

What are these acronyms?

[intothedysphoria]

Embarrassingly, the first time Steve had met Billy, he’d thought he was doing drugs.

It fit the mental profile. Billy was short but with massive hair, massive, heavy boots and patches on his jacket. The only other person Steve had met who looked like that was Munson. Munson was a dealer.

He was later informed that Billy was just trans and “oh my god dingus in what world does injecting testosterone look like injecting heroin?”

The second time Steve met Billy, he realised Billy was absolutely magnetic.

Not in the rom com way or anything, but there was just something about him. Everyone loved Billy. He was funny, acidly sharp and had the natural good looks of the guys who were never interested in Steve on Grindr.

He was also a self professed slut. What this seemed to mean in practice was picking up half a bar whenever they went clubbing or roaring with laughter as he rejected them.

Some guys were weird about it. They had these creepy ass fetishes about trans guys but Billy would always either tell them to fuck off or knee them in the balls.

He’d visit the diner Steve worked at most days and they’d make small talk. Billy liked his pin, the one Steve had with a small dinosaur on. It was fun. A touch of individuality.

Once Billy pinched his cheek (??) and called him cute before slowly walking away. Steve then locked himself in the staff toilets and willed his boner to leave.

The google search “what do trans guys like” was either full of cis men being douchebags or just straight up porn. Neither of these were particularly helpful to Steve.

He fell asleep watching Noahfinnace YouTube videos and trying to find a way to ask Billy out that didn’t make him feel like he was being weird.

Billy apparently did not give a shit about any of Steve’s worrying because he dropped his bag on top of the counter at the end of Steve’s shift and declared

“Harrington pack up your stuff. We’re going out.”

He drove his car at the speed Steve imagined could have Back-To-The -Futured them to the 80s and made a stop outside a tiny Polish place. “You’re Polish right?” Steve’s dad was from Warsaw and his mom was from Algiers. So yeah, you could say Steve was Polish.

It was slightly squashed in but authentic. Billy was also very clearly nervous. His face was extremely flushed and he kept putting his hand out then retracting it. Like he thought Steve would reject him.

Like Steve would ever reject him. Could ever reject him.

Billy decided to drive Steve back to his house. It felt like one of those dates from the 1950s, if you disregarded Billy grumbling about “fucking itchy nipples”. He smacked a wet kiss onto Steve’s lips, scribbled his phone number onto Steve’s arm and started walking back to the car.

“Next time Harrington, I’ll bring the strap on!”

Then his voice faded into the dark.

Next time. There would be a next time.

For any trans harringrovers, I hope you enjoy it

@shieldofiron @dragonflylady77 @oopsiedaisiesbaby @thatgirlwithasquid @robthegoodfellow

[gobitobi]

sdv boys with a transmasc!reader as their partner :)

sfw! includes shane being a flirt, alex being actually competent, harvey being very doctor, sebastian being very proud, sam being a puppy, elliot being a hopeless romantic ❤️

shane ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

when you come out, he’s a bit surprised and asks a few questions (he lives under a rock) but once you answer them he obliges and respects you

he’ll probably forget to call you your preferred pronouns and you’ll have to correct him, but when you do he goes “oh crap sorry, i meant…” and he’ll go on

he loves watching you put on your binder for some unknown reason. “what?” you ask him when you catch him staring as you slip the binder over your head. he exhales through his nose with that stupid smile that obviously means he loves you. “you’re just so handsome,” he replies then pulls you into a kiss.

if you’re on t he’ll ask you if you need any help on your shot days. he forgets your days a lot and when you remind him that it’s your day he’s like “oh!” and helps you with whatever you need :)

alex ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

when you come out he’s lowkey excited. he’s never met a trans person before and his first reaction is “woah that’s so cool!” and he’ll obviously have so many questions

i choose to believe he’s at a decent height above you so he often calls you his short king

he definitely goes out to zuzu city and gets you however many binders you need in whatever size you need, it really doesn’t matter to him

whenever you feel dysphoric he’ll let you borrow a shirt or sweater of his and he’ll sit down with you and watch a show or whatever with you while calling you his pretty boy or handsome boy or any affirmative name you like

if you’re on t he’ll INSIST on doing the shot for you. he’s a bit scared of needles but he needs to tough it out in order to be your big strong bf. there’ll be a few times where he gets too scared so you just have to do it but then he feels super bad for not being able to do it for you :( but you just grab his face in yours hands and tell him he’s strong anyways :3

harvey *ೃ༄

he’s a doctor, he knows what it means so he has not questions other than what he can do to help you out

he’s very strict with your binder. he has a timer set for when you have to take it off after 8 hours and when it goes off he’s all like “my love, you have to take your binder off now! i’ll lend you one of my sweaters that you can wear if you don’t feel good without it.” he so loving 😭❤️

if you’re feeling dysphoric he’ll hug you tightly and rub your back while whispering “you’re so handsome, my darling. the most beautiful boy i’ve ever laid eyes on.”

if you’re on t, much like alex, he insists on doing it for you. but he wont get disgusted or scared. he’ll do all the right procedures and does it very securely and quickly. it’ll be like a little prick through your skin but then he’ll go “all done!” like it never even happened

sebastian ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

he’s kind neutral about it, like “…okay.” and then he asks your pronouns and stuff like that.

doesn’t mess up your pronouns ONCE. in fact he’ll use them a bit too much when talking to other people. he’ll go “oh yeah my BOYfriend is a great cook. HE makes an amazing salmon. HE also catches HIS own fish.” you catch my drift? he kinda rubs it into other peoples faces

he likes to watch you wearing a sweater over just your binder with shorts or sweats, speshly while going to bed. “you’re super cute, by the way,” he’ll say but that’s obviously an understatement coming from him.

if you’re on t he will not help you (im sorry)!!! he’ll like sit and watch you give it to yourself. he’ll take notes and stuff yk? but if you ask him to help you out he’ll do it, but i think he might get queasy at needles

sam ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

when you come out to him he’ll be like “oh that’s cool!” and have no questions, he gets the gist

sometimes he’ll slip up you’re pronouns but then he apologizes and corrects himself immediately

he’s moderately taller than you, so he likes to ruffle your hair and pick you up in his semi-strong arms

he likes to go through your closet and see what sizes most of your favorite shirts are so he knows how to make you feel comfortable in your body

if you’re on t he’ll help you all you want! he’s a bit goofy around needles and shots but for you he puts on his big boy panties and toughens up :)

he’ll randomly come up behind you and tell you how handsome or masculine you look today, he’ll be like “just wanna let you know how beautiful you are, baby boy” and “love having a boyfriend as amazing as you”

elliot ੈ✩‧₊˚

i’m gonna be honest… i don’t think he’d understand fully at first but he’s open to learning. after a few days or weeks of trying really hard it’ll burn itself into his brain

he loves to twirl his fingers with yours, admiring how big his are compared to yours. “you’re so handsome,” he mutters in your ear. “you fit so perfectly with me, no matter what you are.”

he gets you everything you need. all your binders are in the wash? bam, he makes one out of a corset. oh you’re late on t? pow, it’s already done. your hair’s getting too long? this man can STYLE and CUT. i mean look at him.

he talks about you very poetically. you’ve definitely found little notes about you in his drawers - “my boyfriend is so beautiful. he is the most amazing man i’ve ever met. i love him so much. his smile is the moon that gives my ocean its waves. i’d follow him to hell and back if it meant seeing him every minute of every day.” when you confront him about it he’ll get kind of nervous but he’ll tell you: “all of that is true. you are my god.”

[commsroom]

cutter was born in the 20s, and he'd become "arthur keller" by the early 70s, so obviously pryce's story at the beginning of brave new world can't be taken literally - that's not even an old man, much less "older than anyone she had ever met." it's also inarguable she was an adult already working on her... ideas for the human body when cutter sought her out; "i want you to make a doll for me" and "i found people who had some very bold ideas about how to... tune up the human body [...] i funded their work, and provided them with a willing test subject" are pretty definitely referring to the same events. so, it's fairy tale language, but the question is: why? why frame it this way?

one part of it is the "fountain of youth" in connection to immortality, strength, and health. the implication isn't literally that cutter is very old and pryce is very young; it's that she represents this power, and that he wants her to bestow it upon him: "then you and i will fix the world. i will be young and you will be whole." cutter and pryce choose to look eternally 28, while referring to and conducting themselves as if they're very old: it's not just vanity, it's part of their self-mythology. simultaneously young and old, having overcome the natural order.

that mythology of "overcoming" natural limitations is especially significant for pryce: characterizing herself as a "little girl" within her own story is both self-victimizing and self-aggrandizing. pryce does not see herself as disabled so much as temporarily inconvenienced; even the usual limitations of the human body are something she hopes to transcend. "instead of being wretched or afraid, the little girl decided to be clever." she was put at a disadvantage, but overcame it all by herself because she was smarter and better than other people. by extension, anyone who can't do what she did just isn't good enough, even as she's closing doors behind her and making it harder for others like her. and at the same time: it's an underdog story that requires her to have been an underdog. she hasn't been in a very, very long time, but the power she holds over others remains justified in her self-perception by this image of a sick little girl who was hurt by the world. there's an implication of inherent worthiness, and even a sort of expected assumed innocence in characterizing it that way. the first thing people notice about pryce is her eyes, and... sure, maybe it's the technology, but if cutter can catch bullets without any visible signs, it seems likely to me that, like her age, this is at least in part an aesthetic choice. it intimidates people. she's turned this point of hurt and vulnerability into a power play, and remains attached to it.

and that's the other part of the mythologizing that's going on: presumably, pryce was not the only person who worked on all of this. cutter funded others. but the story retroactively simplifies it, in a childish fairy tale way, and paints an image of them as exceptional, uniquely capable and so uniquely deserving, people.

i think there's something interesting to consider here about pryce in contrast to hera: that pryce is a woman who self-justifies her cruelty via a mythologized girlhood, while hera is a woman who was never a girl, who was never considered innocent or even allowed the same recognition of the ways she's been a victim. pryce resents humanity and all it represents, resents her body and its limitations, feels that being human has only caused her suffering, but still clearly believes that she has more of a claim to humanity than hera does by nature of her biology and upbringing. pryce's "bootstraps" attitude re: disability and her own self-victimization are the crucial things here, but i think that is also particularly interesting if you read hera as a trans woman.

(incidentally, this is part of why i have a particular love for hera designs where she's just a regular woman, more angular, and maybe even older looking - a natural 30-something in contrast to an unnaturally maintained 28 - than pryce. they're both women who have chosen how they want to look, and it highlights something.)