#i will have you know i had to start taking iron supplements this week and it has NOT been good for my tummy!!!

[blindmagdalena]

Out of pocket but now I'm wondering if he could tell you're constipated based on your stomach grumbles

straight to jail

[octuscle]

I'm your average joe who works an average desk job and at 45 I have nothing great going for me. Sometimes I just wish I could do it over again. Maybe take up a diffrent major in college, something that would set me up for a more adventurous life. Can you help me achieve this?

Okay, who wants to be average? And who wouldn't want to know what their life would have been like if they had made a different decision at some point? I mean, your decisions weren't actually bad. Bank apprenticeship, business studies, going to the gym twice a week… You have a house in the suburbs, a cool car. It could have been worse! But also better. We can manage that! Monday, 12:00 noon, let's get started!

When you finish work in the evening, you're still full of energy. Even though you worked until 19:00 today. It's paying off that you started making the gym your home seven months ago. When you arrive at the gym at 8 p.m., Steve greets you at reception with a fist bump. Everyone here greets you. Some of them are good friends of yours. The rest at least know you by sight. No wonder, you're here every day. In the morning before work. In the evening after work. And the effort pays off. From a very well-built man with the typical rolls of flab, you have developed into an athlete. A machine. Not one of the big boys. But close. You call it a day at 22:00. You need seven hours' sleep, you want to be back here at 07:00. One last critical look in the mirror. Not bad for a man in his mid-40s…

Get up, gym, office… You work like clockwork. You're good at your job. The development of your body has boosted your career. Today you have another lunch date with a division manager. He asks you if it's time to take the next step in your career. It's been two years since you moved to the "Digital Research and Development" division. That was also the initial spark for your physical transformation. As an accounting employee, you had previously become a lazy and saturated couch potato… You smile and, as if by chance, flex your huge biceps. You know that makes him hot. And the prospect of a blowjob after lunch is tempting. Of course, he immediately notices that your cock is getting hard… You have his hand in your crotch for the rest of lunch.

When you arrive at the gym at 7pm on Wednesday, you first have to go through your post. As the largest shareholder, you are only the chairman of the supervisory board. But many people confuse that with managing director. Idiots who are just stealing your precious time on the weights. Since you introduced the "Meathead Gym" brand and turned your old gym into the flagship of the new brand, you feel even more at home here. No classes, no machines, no women. Just honest, hard bodybuilding. Dress code is at least off-the-shoulder. In fact, shirtless is preferred. It goes without saying that you don't wear a tank top either.

You're the first one in the gym on Friday morning. Good thing you have the keys. You look around. Your empire. It was a big step to leave your good job almost eight years ago and start working at the fitness start-up. For hardcore bodybuilders, you are now the market leader as a fitness studio, but also in nutritional supplements and gym clothing. Steve arrives at 05:30. He has the early shift at reception. You greet him with a fist bump. Good man. A little weak in the chest. At least compared to you… But he'll get there!

You visit a school friend at the weekend. His son is a handsome stud. He could turn into a real gym hunk. He asks if he can take a selfie with you. Sure, I'd love to, you say. He asks you if you can give him any tips on what he should do now. He's finishing high school now. You ask him what position he plays football. He grins and says that he prefers to spend his time in the gym. You can see that. You tell your school friend to listen away for a moment. And then you tell your son that he shouldn't bother with college and university. You're glad you didn't do that either. You started pumping iron straight away. And then brought your dream to life. Live your dream, you tell him. And that you'd be happy if it could start at your company.

[osamusbigtits]

"can I bite you?" osamu asks, looking at suna with pleading eyes.

"no, I haven't taken my iron supplements in like, two weeks," suna replies.

osamu groans and falls back on the couch dramatically. "why do you hate me?"

suna frowns. "you know I am not a consistent person."

"what if I don't draw blood?" osamu sits up.

"what are you, a dog?"

osamu sits in close, wrapping his arms around suna's waist and tucking his nose into suna's neck. "you just smell so good today," osamu mumbles, his lips tickles suna's neck.

"when's the last time you fed?"

"don't worry about it." osamu breathes in and licks suna's neck.

suna flinches at the cold, wet feeling. "I have to worry about it when you're seconds away from eating me."

osamu chuckles, a dark sounding laugh. suna pushes osamu away, earning a whine.

"go feed," suna says.

osamu scoffs as he pulls away. "take your supplements," he huffs before he disappears.

suna grumbles to himself about the high maintenance of a vampire lover. still, he gets up to take his iron supplements and eat some protein. osamu says he loves the smell of suna's blood when he's had more protein.

suna sits in the kitchen while he waits for osamu to return. osamu returns, almost like suna summoned him.

"you've got some blood on your face," suna says and reaches out. he cups osamu's cheek and wipes the blood with his thumb.

osamu opens his mouth and suna puts his thumb in.

atsumu walks in at that moment. "yall, I said keep this shit in your room. it's bad enough I gotta fucking hear you," atsumu rants as he starts to dig in the fridge.

suna smiles at osamu as a light blush starts to grow on the latter. "samu was just hungry," suna says.

atsumu shudders. "you're disgusting."

"no, it's not like that," osamu says and pushes suna as suna cackles.

[daphnedauphinoise]

how do you care for your hair when you use heat on it? Like what steps/routine do you follow? Not necessarily products (although they're very welcome). It's hard to know what's good and what's not since your hairdresser, just like influencers, are most likely selling you something.

I changed my haircut recently and started using heat (it's kinda curly so I straighten it and then try to curl it a little) and it really changed me and got told so much that I had a glow up, so I think that's my best look and will try to keep doing it since it looks great on on me but I want my hair to be and stay healthy so that's why I'm asking you.

Thank you for this question, I loved digging through to make this post x

I am going to talk about prevention and solutions so you can fully protect your hair. Starting with protection, and I have to say it, don't use heat regularly. Ideally you would take a minimum of three/four day break between each use of heat and this is only if your hair is healthy. If the condition of your hair is not that healthy then I would suggest going even longer (once a week, every other wash etc) between each use. To further reduce how much heat you are using, I would reccomend not using heat to curl your hair. You can easily do heatless curls and because they have been so popular, you can find easy tutorials anywhere. You can use a bonnet/ protective hair styles to keep your hairstyle for longer to widen the gap between each heat usage.

Futhermore, I would look into learning how to refresh your style so you are not having to consistenly go back and redo your hair.

You said that you straigthen your hair more so I am presuming you are using iron for that. If you are, use heat protectant made for heating irons as they can differ from standard heat protectants.

Proper use of heat protectant:

Spray the heat protectant in sections. A lot of people just spritz heat protectant on the hair that is on the top and the whole section underneath has not been protected.

You can also spray teh heat protectant on your hairbrush and brush your hair with that. Make sure to cover your entire head, I find it works better to do this just before the section you are applying heat to.

For further scientific details here is a post by a chemist that I follow on the scienece of heat protection.

I would also invest in some split end serum/ smoothing serum to help nourish the ends of your hair and help prevent breakage. I highly reccomend the Kérastase Nutritive Nutri-Supplement Split Ends Serum. I have been using for a while and it has made my ends so much smoother and less frizzy looking. This is more preventative and it saves the tears of realising that the only thing that will save your hair is a big chop.

Aftercare

You need to make sure that you are getting rid of all the product build up in your hair and making sure it is clean. I would use a clarifying shampoo every second/third wash, depending on how much product you use and whether you live in a city etc... I find that using it every 4-5 washes works for me but that is because I barely use any product on my hair.

When it comes to coniditioning, there are two types: protein and moisturizing. A good routine has both but how much will depend on the porosity of your hair. Protien hair masks help with elasticity, whereas moisturising masks help with length and shine.

I have seen chemists and hair care specialists reccomend fully deeply conditioning your hair before heat styling and for that a good moisturizing mask would do the trick. After this the general rules of hair care apply.

(further links)

How to know if your hair needs protein or moisture?

Testing the porosity of your hair

Daphne

[cbk1000]

And part three. (Final part; sorry this is so long: it has been a fucking long four months.)

No problem, Doctor Dipshit, I guess I'll just do your job and continue treating myself.

After my period ends, my heart rate drops again. It's still not as low as it should be, but it's much better. I continue to gradually improve. It's not a linear process; some days are better than others, but I never feel as bad as I did at the beginning of all this. My main issue is really my heart rate at this point; I'm no longer dizzy, I don't have the extreme weakness I had, my nausea is gone, I'm sleeping much better, and I'm a lot less tired than I was even before all this started. But the high heart rate keeps me still mostly bedbound, and I'm gnashing my teeth, because at this point I feel well enough to be mad about it, instead of just lying in bed trying to stave off death.

I finally start turning a corner, almost three months into taking supplements. My heart rate is consistently lower; even my last period wasn't as rough. (I felt a little worse than I had been, but my heart rate didn't spike, and I mostly just felt more run down than I normally would during my period.)

Over the last couple of weeks, I've been able to sit and stand and walk around for much longer, and I was finally, after months, able to start writing again. My heart rate is still a bit higher than it should be, and I have chest pain and tightness that radiates into my throat (it almost feels like an asthma attack) if I exert myself too much, but I can sit up for a good couple, few hours at a time, then lie down for a few minutes till those symptoms improve, and then get back up again. It is more exhausting to do things because of this, but I still, honestly, feel less tired than when I was a fully functioning, 'normal' person, and I've noticed that the horrible, frequent anxiety attacks I was having multiple times a week, out of nowhere, with no trigger, haven't happened since I started supplementing. I have been stressed, of course, but not baselessly anxious. Apparently iron deficiency can cause or worsen anxiety, so the anxiety I was having for the last couple of years that I attributed to all the changes at work, and how generally stressful the world has been, was also likely related to this.

Today, three and a half months after starting iron supplements, I'm writing this sitting up at my computer. I have some chest pain, but right now it's more of an annoyance than anything, and I can push through for a while before I'll need to lie down for a bit. The last week I have been able to write 27,000 words, animatedly play a video game I'm into at the moment (I shout a lot when I play), take Seamus outside multiple times a day while Mr. Jenn is at work (albeit for very short walks around the backyard, but still), edit, and concentrate on my reading. I can now sit out and eat dinner at our countertop and visit with Mr. Jenn. I spend more time up now than I do in bed. Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment with a non-lunatic, and will hopefully be able to get medical clearance to finally return to work (Mr. Jenn and I have rigged up my desk so that I can recline and still see my monitors and work if I need more than my allotted breaks to rest) and an order for an iron infusion to get me the rest of the way more quickly. It has been the longest four months of my life. I have felt trapped in my own body. There were points during that constant back and forth of regressing a bit, improving a bit, regressing a bit, that I was afraid I would be stuck like that forever. I've had enough of consistently being on my feet day after day over the last few weeks that, while I'm not yet at 100% and know it will still probably be a while before I am, I know I will be, eventually. I actually feel confident in that now.

What I mean to say with these three very long-winded posts is, please do not ignore what your body is telling you. I wrote off the extreme fatigue, and anxiety, and burning and tingling I was feeling in my legs and feet as poor sleep, the world going to shit, muscle strain, etc. etc. That was my body trying to tell me something was really wrong. I did not know these were symptoms of iron deficiency; and not everyone gets them, and not everyone gets such severe symptoms that their entire body shuts down and confines them to bed for months: but there was something wrong with me, probably for years, and I ignored that, and wrote it off, because the symptoms were non-specific, and I'd lived with them for so long that I normalized them. If you are having any of these symptoms, especially fatigue, especially if you're menstruating, and especially especially if most of your iron sources aren't from meat, please get an iron panel done. Not your CBC; that will only tell you if your hemoglobin is ok, and I can tell you, as exhibit A, that just because your hemoglobin is normal, does not mean you don't have iron deficiency. B12 deficiency will cause some of these same symptoms as well, so if you're vegetarian, definitely get that checked as well.

The only reason I was able to put two and two together was because I had had similar cardiac issues after a blood donation, when it was easy to go, "Wait, I think you bled too much; let's put some iron back in you." I don't want to think about how long I might have been stuck like this getting booted from specialist to specialist with no one thinking to check my iron levels because my hemoglobin was normal. If you do not have enough of this one single mineral in your body, it can literally be debilitating. I work a desk job from home; I have been out of work for four months now because I haven't even been able to sit up at a desk. I actually ran out of legally-protected medical leave a month ago and am just lucky that my employer wants to keep me enough that they were willing to put me on personal leave until I was ready to come back.

Anyway, that is my extremely long update. I sincerely appreciate everyone who has checked in on me and asked how I'm doing.

[sidewalkscienceguy]

Today was my last formal day of teaching. I resigned back in March, before spring break. I don't post much on my personal account, so unless you follow Sidewalk Science Center, you don't hear too much from me.

SSC is on a steep climb, projected to more than double our 2023 revenue, with 155% more anticipated events in 2024 compared to 2023 (225 vs 145). We now have 14 employees: 12 educators and 2 Event Coordinators, covering events that span 110 miles of Florida's coast.

Put simply, it's a lot, and teaching has been interfering with my ability to properly perform administrative work and event coordination for SSC, where I've been falling behind emails and calls. It's certainly a full-time job, anywhere from 40-60 hours per week, seeing upwards of 3,000-5,000 people per month across 20 events each month.

Teaching was never the goal, just a walking stick to get up the mountain of starting a business - and a nonprofit, at that. I've been running SSC for nearly 6 years, and while we've still got kinks and shortcomings and things to iron out, we've also integrated ourselves into local communities, meeting kids and families outside the classroom, outside the museum, outside the work hours.

Around here, SSC has sort of stopped being strange to people. Many know to expect us. Many tell us that they look for us at the park. Some have traveled from other states and added us to their itinerary. We're just a table, a team, and a commitment to providing access to resources they likely don't have at home, at a place and time when it may otherwise be difficult to take your kids and families to educational institutions.

I've been building a dream. I'm a writer at heart, and an educator in mind. Creating these experiences not only for people at the park, but for our employees, too, who now have avenues to teach and reach a whole new audience. Traveling and experiencing things we otherwise never would? That's all part of it.

I'll still substitute teach to supplement necessary income, but without formal teaching in the picture, I can dedicate a vast amount of time I've never had for Sidewalk Science Center before, all while knowing it's to a point where this is a viable route to follow. I'm nervous, of course. I'm quitting a guaranteed financial safeguard. But trusting that I can now utilize 8 extra hours every day, rather than squeezing it into 2 or 3? I really feel like this is the best choice.

Really, the SSC team has made this life-change possible. SSC is a place where you can project your passion onto the world. You're not teaching, you're inspiring. When people have conversations with our educators where passion shines through above all else, you can feel the joy or learning flood through them. It's so important to find people who understand that this is not a job, it's a lifestyle, and we've only just started living it.

If you feel so inclined, you can leave a tax-deductible donation for us here (we are a 501c3 nonprofit corporation): www.donorbox.org/ssc-2024

To all our endeavors.

[lovelyrocker]

Consequences Part 2

RPF

Warnings: Talk of Cheating, STD, Language, Angst, 

Parings: Timothee Chalamet x Reader

Word Count: 1,244

Two weeks was how long you had to wait for the test results to come in. Timothee and you both got tested for every other STD it was possible to get tested for safe measures. He’d only known the extra for several days before he’d slept with her. Not long to know where and who someone had been with. 

Your home was cold the last few weeks. Timothee had been staying in the guest room. You didn't talk to one another aside from one or two words here and there. You could hardly look at him. All of the feeling and rage that you thought you’d pushed aside when you found out he cheated was filling you now. Yes, when you found out he cheated you cried and was pissed. But those feelings quickly faded when you saw how much his actions were eating him alive. You saw that it really was a mistake and he learned from it. You had no doubt that he would never do that again.

Now you were enraged that he could even think of cheating, even if he was drunk. You were betrayed and so hurt. And now, you are terrified of having this disease. This constant reminder of someone else’s careless actions. Someone who was supposed to love, take care of you, keep you safe.

You both sat in the doctor’s office in front of the desk, waiting for him to come into the room. Waiting, more waiting. Timothee’s leg bounced with anxiety. He fiddled with his fingers as he absentmindedly looked around the office. He was scared. But unlike all the other times you would hold him and assure him it would be okay, you didn’t. Because you didn’t know. You weren’t even sure you were going to stay with him after this. Deep down he knew that, too.

The door opened, making both of you jump as the doctor walked in. “Good morning.” The doctor said cheerfully. It made you roll your eyes. “I have both your test results here.” He said placing two folders on his desk. He looked up at the two of you. “Are you sure you want to do this together? Normally we do this separately.”

“We’re sure.” Timothee answered, rubbing the palms of his hands nervously on his jean clad knees.

“Alright then,” He opens the file. “We’ll start off with Ms. Y/L/N.” He looks over the paper in his hand. You’re holding on to your bag tightly, heart racing. “All of your STD panels came back negative.” You and Timothee both exhale in relief as the doctor’s eyes scan the page. “No HIV or anything like that.” He looks up at you. “You are a little anemic so I would make sure you get more iron in you. You can get over the counter supplements.” 

You nod your head. “Okay.” You take another breath. “Is that all?”

“Yeah. You are a very healthy young lady.” He placed the paper into the folder and grabs Timothee’s. “Now Mr. Chalamet.” He lifts the page out of the manilla folder. “Your STD panel came back inconclusive.” 

“Inconclusive? What does that mean?” You ask before Timothee can open his mouth. 

“Most of your results came back negative.” The doctor explains. “But Your HIV results aren’t clear.”

You reach over, taking Timothee’s hand, entwining your fingers. He squeezed you hand with both of his. “So, what do we do?” You ask, looking at the doctor.

“We will do another blood draw. Retest.” The doctor looks at Timothee. “I’ll be honest with you,” His hand tightens around yours. “You have some abnormalities with your white blood cell count. Have you been sick lately?”

Timothee shakes his head. “Just tired. With my work, I-I-”

“You could just be overworked.” The doctor looks over the page again. “I don’t want to take any chances. We will do another blood draw and run a few other tests.” The doctor closes the folder. “Do you have any questions?”

Timothee swallows hard and looks at you then back to the doctor. “Can you not sugar coat it?” He says finding his voice. “What are the odds I'm infected?”

The doctor takes a breath, removing his glasses. “It is harder for a woman to give it to a man, but you admit to not using protection. All it takes is one time.” He exhales again. “But your white blood cell count shows something is going on. The results do align with being infected, yes.” You felt Timothee go rigid. “Even though you haven’t passed it to Y/N doesn’t mean you are in the clear. But these results can mean a dozen other things as well. Is it probable because you were exposed, yes. Is it 100% positive, no.” 

“When does he get retested?” You ask.

“Right now.” The doctor stands. “Follow me and I’ll show you to the lab.”

You hold his hand as you follow the doctor and watch him squint when the nurse sticks the needle into his arm. You drive back to the apartment, Timothee showing no sign of emotions the entire drive. He doesn’t talk or even look your way. He doesn’t comment about your results or even look away from the car window. 

When you got home, he walked into the apartment and straight to the guest room. You followed him, opening the bedroom door. He was laying in the bed, back to the door. You didn’t say anything. You crawled into the bed behind him and wrapped your arms around him. The moment you embraced him he broke. The tears fell down his face as he sobbed hysterically. You didn’t say a thing, just held him. Timothee cried until he had nothing left in him. No tears, no energy to let his body be wracked with his own fear and self-loathing. 

When he finally calmed, he just laid there with no emotion on his face. You still stayed silent. You just let him know you were still there by holding him tight, as close as you could. 

The room had been quiet for a long time, you thought he’d fallen asleep. You were surprised when you heard his voice groggily speak. “I’m sorry.” He says, barely audible. “I’m sorry I fucked everything up.” He turns in your arms and his eyes are puffy and red. He looks exhausted. You fight the tears that you know he can see fill your eyes. “We were supposed to be together forever. Just you and me. We were supposed to have a family and grow old in the city.” He begins to cry again. “I messed it all up and I am so fucking sorry.”

You pull him till your foreheads meet. “Shh.” You whisper. “Stop it.” You wipe away his tears. “You’re not alone.” I pull him close, tucking his head beneath my chin. “I’m here, with you.” You kiss the top of his head. “I’m not going anywhere.” You feel him hold you tighter.

You could feel the fear pulsing through him. Before you were ready to leave Timothee, to let him and his cheating self, deal with the consequences of his action on his own, all alone. Which was how you felt when he first cheated. Alone.

In your arms now were the broken pieces of the love of your life. And there was no way in hell you were going to leave him alone. No matter what.

Part 3

[bunnakit]

man last twilight hit me particularly hard today and i'm still crying after finishing the episode.

i spent a good chunk of my day at my specialist today and it wasn't great. my disease is getting worse. my weekly shots aren't enough anymore. i'm so tired and i can't stop fucking crying.

my immune system is fucked up, i produce too many white blood cells and those white blood cells have chosen to attack my skin. it leaves me with holes across my body - some of my wounds are now over a year old. when they heal they leave atrophic scarring - but they aren't even healing anymore.

the specialist gasped at the sight of me today. (i'd never seen her before, my state of being was new to her.)

"you're bleeding."

"i know."

"you're bleeding like, a lot."

"i know. i take iron supplements, it's okay."

"it's going to get all over your pants."

"it's okay."

"are you in pain?"

"yes. i'm used to it."

"are you in a lot of pain?"

"yes. it's okay."

she was so concerned, so alarmed, and i couldn't help but just smile and laugh it off. if i don't i'll end up like i am now, sobbing at my desk hidden away from my family because there's nothing they can do for me, they'll just hug me and say they're so sorry, they wish there was something they could do. but there's nothing anyone can do, this is just my life now.

"how often do you take your shots?"

"every friday."

"the recommended schedule for that medicine is once every two weeks"

"yes, they increased the frequency for me because i'm stage 3"

"and you never miss a dose?"

"no, i take it on schedule every week."

"i don't think it's working anymore."

i try to be strong about it, most of the time i am - this is just my life now, wallowing about it isn't going to fix it. i'm stage 3, the only thing that will fix it is a cure, but that doesn't exist yet.

i recently had to buy those washable period underwear because one of my year old wounds just won't stop bleeding and i'm so tired of washing the blood out of my pants. i've gotten so good at preventing bloodstains. (a mix of dawn dish soap, water, and baking soda as a pre-soak works wonders)

i bought an antimicrobial soap in bulk last week to prevent infection. it dries out my skin, but it's not as bad as the diluted bleach baths. i have to start using 10% benzoyl peroxide as a body wash. "do you have a fever?"

"no, i check regularly."

"your wounds are really deep, we're worried about you potentially going septic."

"i'm very careful and keep them clean."

i buy bandages and tape in bulk. my allergic reaction to the tape adhesives are the lesser of two evils. sometimes they get so bad i bleed, but it's just an abrasion. it's okay.

and now i have to take another round of antibiotics that make me nauseous.

and they're changing my medication. i'm 'lucky,' a new medication was approved by the FDA recently that shows good results in reducing the symptoms of my disease. but how long will it be before i don't respond to that anymore?

it's another biologic, an immunosuppressant shot, and i'm sure just like last time it's going to make me so, so sick. adjusting to biologics is so hard, it's not totally unlike low dose chemo (obviously there are differences) and last time it made me sick for weeks.

i don't want to be sick. i don't want to take these antibiotics that make me nauseous. i don't want to keep scrubbing the blood out of my pants. i don't want to use the soap that dries out my skin. i don't want to wear perfume to cover up the smell of my dying flesh. i can't even have sex with my husband. we recently went a year without having sex and i know he understands, he gets it, but i can't help but think part of him resents me. we got together when i was 22, when my symptoms were still mild, i got my diagnosis at 25. i quit my office job and lost my insurance. we eloped at 27 so he could add me to his insurance and i could afford my treatment. his family spent the next year asking why we were in such a rush to get married, we didn't know how to explain to them it was because my doctor was preparing to declare me completely disabled.

i don't want to be in pain anymore. it's been almost 10 years.

i'm okay, i'll feel better tomorrow, maybe even in a few hours, but i can see why people kill themselves over this. i'm so tired. i'm so defeated. i have to hope there will be a cure someday, something better than just pushing down the symptoms.

if you read this far thank you. like i said, i'm fine. i just wanted to get my thoughts and feelings out and i'm bad about talking to my family - they worry too much, pity me too much.

[lets-donate-a-kidney]

Reasons to Donate a Kidney

You can make terrible, terrible kidney puns, and no one can stop you from kidney-ing around.

The average lifespan on dialysis is only 5-10 years. You might extend someone's life by 20 years or more!

Dialysis is painful, exhausting, prevents a person from holding a regular work schedule or traveling, and weakens their body over time. Eventually, it fails. You'd be freeing someone to have a normal life.

You aren't just helping the recipient: you're giving something priceless to all the friends and family members who care about that person.

Kidneys from living donors have a higher success rate than kidneys from deceased donors, and last for twice as long!

You might start a kidney chain, in which multiple people receive kidneys! The longest chain on record gave kidneys to over 100 people - and was started by a stranger who didn't know any of them.

Over 80,000 people in the USA alone need a kidney transplant, and several thousand die every year waiting for one. But if even just 1 in 1000 adults donated a kidney, we could wipe out the waiting list overnight.

Kidneys almost always fail in pairs. Your chance of kidney failure isn't much higher with one kidney compared to two.

You get cool donation scars to show people!

Kidney donors actually live longer than the general population, and have a lower rate of kidney failure! Why? Because the screening process for kidney donation screens out potential illnesses early, and kidney donors are more likely to take care of their bodies afterward.

If your remaining kidney does fail, you'll be put at the top of the kidney wait-list, and spend much less time on dialysis. As a result, kidney donors actually have a higher survival rate for kidney failure than non-donors.

The National Kidney Registry also lets kidney donors extend this waitlist benefit to several friends and relatives, in case any of them ever have kidney failure.

The risk of long-term complications from kidney donation is extremely low. Most people can start walking within a day of surgery, go back to work in 1-2 weeks, and are back to 100% within a month.

Doctors and nurses LOVE doing living donor transplants! The success rate is high, complications are low, there's none of the tragedy associated with postmortem transplants, and for once their patients are eager to be there. And, as my nephrologist said, "It's a lot more rewarding than prescribing Viagra!"

It's a way to put a little more kindness into the world, and your example might inspire others, too.

In the USA, all costs for surgery and screenings are covered by the recipient's health insurance or Medicaid/Medicare; you as the donor will not have to pay for it. You can also get reimbursement for lost income through the National Kidney Registry.

Most people will have to get surgery and spend a night in the hospital anyway if they live long enough. Donating an organ lets you have this experience on your terms, while you're healthy, so hospitalization won't be scary or overwhelming if you need it later in life.

You'll learn new things about your body! I discovered that I had an extra vein on the left side of my torso, and that my hemoglobin levels were low. The vein is harmless and cool, but the hemoglobin thing (and taking iron supplements for it) actually helped me avoid developing an iron deficiency later.

It's a chance to be part of something bigger than yourself - a miracle of modern science!

I won't say donating a kidney was "easy," but I will say it was 95% waiting on people, 4% letting doctors and nurses talk at me, and 1% letting them stick me with needles. The hardest part wasn't pain, or fear, but sitting around tired for a couple days.

You probably won't have to make many modifications to your lifestyle after kidney donation. Literally the only activity I was told to avoid was contact sports, and if I'm in pain I take acetaminophen instead of ibuprofen.

You can get a tattoo that says "Some parts may be missing," or "Organ donation - it takes guts!" and a kidney pillow souvenir.

If donating while alive isn't right for you, you can still sign up to be a postmortem organ donor, and increase awareness of living donation! Remember, it would only take a small percentage of people donating to make a BIG difference!

[deathsbestgirl]

so. when i was a kid, and schools decided to try & scare kids away from cigarettes. and they talked about all the things that happen to your body, the way it causes cancer and what cancer looks like...i went home and started stealing my dad's cigarettes & lighters. i did it a lot. and one day my mom found the stash of them hidden in my room. she sat me down and asked why i had them. i told her i didn't want dad to die and she told me dad wasn't going to die. but i think i held onto that fear, it never went away.

and then it happened. he had stage four throat cancer.

before his diagnosis, he was having trouble swallowing for months. eating took him hours. he wasn't taking it seriously, insisting he was fine. my mom & i were on his case for what felt like ages.

when he finally went to the doctor, she gave him antibiotics, obviously that didn't do anything to help. the second time, my mom went with him and he went to an oncologist.

i had a trip planned with my friend, i told her my dad's had cancer & i didn't know if i could go (we were taking a very long road trip back to where she lived). she was great, but my parents insisted i go. so i did.

i called everyday, and my dad was in the hospital the entire time i was gone. when i got back home, my mom & sister told me that he needed to be intubated, at some point he flatlined but he was stable now.

the tumor in his throat was cutting of his airway when they got him to the hospital. i don't remember what he was going to the hospital for, but it was a shock.

at this time, i was still pretty sick myself. and that week i came back home was the worst i ever felt. but it was different. i can't explain to you the panic i was feeling. we were at the hospital everyday for hours. i was making us food & bringing it with us and forcing my mom & sister to eat something. everyday. i couldn't stay in the room when the doctors came in. and eventually it was more than panic and "feelings of doom" — i was so physically ill. i remember going to cvs to get medicine, and everyone in the store getting out of my way & cut the line because i looked like death. i mean a literal walking corpse. i was *grey*

it turned out to be iron or copper poisoning. as soon as i got my period, i was perfectly fine. i'll never know which because i couldn't get to the doctor in time for blood work. (i stopped taking medications & chinese herbs & supplements i was on and i never had this problem again but. this is the second time i almost died)

my mom was so mad at me for leaving the hospital room. it was one of the first days i was back & we were at the hospital. i think they might have had to remove part of the tumor, as much as they could. and then he started treatment.

before he could, he had to have his teeth pulled & dentures made. he had already lost so much weight, and with chemo & radiation, he only lost more. my dad was never a big eater, or rather, he didn't really care. he ate what was put in front of him (he has nine siblings) and always finished our leftovers the rest of us ignored. but...eating became a struggle for him for a different reason. the man never ate anything sweet. maybe a coffee cake when he was drinking his black coffee. suddenly he craves sugar, because it was the only thing that didn't taste bland or terrible.

the longer treatment went on, the weaker he got. i can't tell you how many times i had to pick him up off the floor. (once, i was napping downstairs and he had to bang on the floor to get my attention. we got him a little siren thing after that, because he couldn't yell loud enough if we weren't close by, and banging wasn't always the best option.) or how i had to take the emergency break off his car so he could go somewhere. or once, he was determined to mow the lawn but he couldn't start the lawnmower, but neither could i (the thing was a dinosaur). i was suddenly bigger than my dad.

he had to have a feeding tube eventually, because he kept aspirating. i had to hide all of the alcohol in the house. he had stoped smoking cigarettes, but he was vaping. his fucking oncologist told him it was okay. i guess this was earlier on when they first came out.

the wound around his feeding tube just. never healed. we took him to the hospital a few times because of it.

i can't remember what happened, but one night we had to call an ambulance. my mom & i followed them to the hospital after we grabbed a few things. my aunt & cousin beat us to the hospital. and when we got there, before we found them, there was some confusion with the ambulances. and they mistakenly told us that he was septic. but it wasn't him, it was another man. and as they were wheeling him in we were so confused. the man actually looked so much like my dad, it was scary. but then someone said his name and we were like no. i looked at him again and was like. oh my god mom that's not him. he has no beard. and that's when my cousin popped her head out and told us where my dad was.

it was one of those things we had to laugh at and my poor dad had no idea what was going on.

whenever my dad was in the hospital, my mom & i would go to the bar with my aunt, uncle & cousin. tbone, the bartender & friend of the family, would send us home with a huge to go cup of our drink of choice. he never charged us correctly. i can't explain what a lifeline they all were. (it was the only time my mom & i would drink after my dad was sick & couldn't.)

there was a time he wasn't sleeping, like he'd be awake for days? one day i went out into the kitchen, and my dad was acting a little crazy. i think this was early on. he had spilled coffee everywhere but he wasn't cleaning it up. which was all very weird, as in i don't think i'd ever seen him spill anything. and he was a clean & neat man. i have no idea what he was fussing about, but i told him i would clean it up and he got so annoyed at me, because he was going to clean it up. but i waited at least ten minutes and he didn't.

after that, my mom got his doctor to give him something for anxiety. xanax, and he could only take half and it would knock him out for hours. it helped him so much though. finally getting sleep made him a brand new person.

early on, i think after that first hospital stay, they gave us an oxygen tank & cpr equipment. teaching us how to use it...but my sister & i we're lifeguards. we knew. and he did have to use the oxygen tank. there was one night there was a power outage, and when you have someone on oxygen in the home, you need to call the power company to alert them. they're supposed to give you priority. i can't even remember how this oxygen tank work, but i guess it needed electricity. i can't even picture the thing anymore, and so much is a blur. but it was not a fun experience. we were on edge.

and my dad. god he was such a goofy, quiet guy. unless you got him talking and he could TALK. he was very unlike himself. grumpy & quiet in a different way. bored out of his mind. he wasn't worried that night like we were.

there was another day, he was going to an appointment on his own. i don't remember what it was for. but it wasn't supposed to take long and he was gone for hours. he didn't have a cell phone, never felt like he needed one. he had tried to go to the medical supply store after his appointment, but he didn't know where it was. but instead of going home, he just kept driving up & down the road it was on. so me and my mom and half the family were driving around looking for him. my mom & i on the phone, and i finally spotted his car and he pulled into the shop rite parking lot. he was so angry & frustrated. all of this was really scary, it was completely unlike him. i think this was another reason for the xanax, and a cell phone. (for the longest time i kept the few texts we had sent each other. eventually lost them when i got a new phone.)

he did go into remission eventually, the chemo & radiation worked...but he never regained the muscles in his throat. he was going to physical therapy (or whatever therapy) to learn to swallow again and there wasn't improvement. the doctors said he physically wouldn't be able to eat or drink again.

and then one day, after i had just gotten back from a trip to boston, i was at work. my sister left college because she couldn't stand being 7 hours away when he was sick. they had a very special relationship i wish i could describe. and suddenly, i get a call from tracey, my mom's friend from work and it was her son i was working with. she told me to leave & get home right away. of course it was like 5pm and a 20 minute drive took at least 30. my aunt kathleen, who i had no idea was even in town, also called me. and i could hear in her voice exactly what was wrong. i don't even know who called me first. i remember texting the group chat with my friends that something was really wrong, i couldn't say it but i knew. through all of it, i had never gotten a phone call like that.

i get home and there's an ambulance outside. my aunt kathleen & aunt joanne are there. my sister is in my downstairs apartment. he had a blood clot in his throat that burst. my sister was alone with him. she had to call 911 & do cpr until the ambulance arrived, and they couldn't save him. it was his half birthday.

i can't describe what i feel for my sister. she wouldn't talk about it and she still hasn't. i had to stop my mom from looking at my dad. i don't think she could have handled it.

i've talked about how i don't remember that week very well. but what i do remember is needing to get his chair out of the house. it's where he was sitting when it happened, and we only got it so he could have an easier time standing.

not too long after...my now wife moved in with us. and then my nanny had to move in and my mom gave me & renata the master bedroom. she couldn't stand being in there anymore. she redid the bathroom & we painted, and she took the smallest bedroom.

after my nanny passed, and the pandemic hit. she took a trip down to cape may with my sister and she came home with a trailer at a campground. she lived down there the entire summer until october. and then she decided she wasn't coming back. she bought a house.

for a few years, we rented the house from my mom until she had to sell it. now it's gone. i haven't felt too sad about it, but i do now.

when it was happening, the only people i talked to about it were renata (wife) and ryn & james (my best friends). more recently, it's been easier to talk about him. it's been 4.5 years. and i have the best friends i've ever had. it's good to remember him and feel a connection to him.

remembering this wasn't easy but i think about it a lot. he never really complained, so he never told us what it was like for him. but how it was during it all isn't how i remember him. i remember him before, from when i was little & the tickle fights. the time i threw a tantrum because i wanted to stay home with him instead of going to school. going with him to the bookstore he worked in (all the books we had without covers) the stories he'd tell me about when i was a baby.m (he taught me to climb out of my crib, i'd pull the cabinet doors off & he's put them back on and i'd do it again) what a weirdo he was calculating his gas mileage. how he didn't vote consistently until i started making him. all the sci-fi shows he watched & that we would watch together. when he wouldn't tell me what the word orgasm meant & just kept laughing at me. the way he would take his sweet time making his coffee christmas morning while my sister was vibrating & waiting for him to sit down. how he only ever wore jeans, even in the ocean. how he walked around the house in his boots. how he hated getting new shoes because they were never the same. the way he always gave me & my sister something for valentine's day. when i needed a cortisone shot in my jaw & he took me and didn't make me go back to school after because i was miserable. the way he danced. he loved 30s, 40s & 50s music. he didn't understand how we could listen to the same songs over & over, but he watched the same things over & over. his love of horror. how he taken (mini series) with my sister. the last picture with all of his siblings. the picture of him & my mom when he's wearing a lime green shirt. him mowing the lawn with the bandana rapped our his head. the way i wore bandanas because i wanted to be like him. the greenhouse we used to have in the yard. how he used to grow pot on our deck and my mom made him get rid of it when i did dare (finding weed in his drawer but having no idea what it was lol). how he collected all the different quarters and kept half dollars & dollar coins. the photos he carried around with pictures of all the kids in our family. the way i'm "just like him" and what everyone really means is probably autistic lol the story about a gay man hitting on him. the time he was arrested at the shore for open alcohol or whatever and the cop was basically a kid lol the way he would swim out really far in the ocean with me & my mom would be having a heart attack and eventually the lifeguards would yell at us to come back in. the way he went on the rollercoasters with my sister bc i didn't like them. the way he barely used crutches for a day after his knee surgery. i think about my uncle kevin telling me how much he loved me & my sister & my mom.

[zuckarr]

1 year as a vegan 🌱 an honest overview

I'm a 30 year old woman, and I decided to go vegan in April 2022. I was never a vegetarian. I switched from an omnivorous diet to a plant-based diet overnight, and I have strictly adhered to the latter, with the only few exceptions being accidents.

I would like to write down how my journey as a vegan has been so far, what pros and cons I encountered and how my overall health was impacted. I intend to talk with my heart on my sleeve about everything and I am totally open to questions or clarifications. This post is nothing more than my own subjective, unique experience as a relatively new vegan person. However I won't be talking about the morality of veganism, nor the reasons why I decided to go vegan. I want to give voice to the bodily and mental changes I am going through instead, plus a few personal final thoughts.

I'd like to begin by stating that:

I have been taking several blood tests during the last year in order to keep track of the changes.

I have been taking vitamin B12 supplements as strongly recommended by every single doctor and veganism related website/source.

I have no prior sickness of any kind.

HEADACHES.

Headaches used to permeate my days before going vegan - so much that I had stopped noticing them (when bearable). During my first week as a vegan, the sudden disappearance of my headaches felt like a miracle. I would've never anticipated how life-changing that was. I was so used to my head pounding that the absence of the pain couldn't have gone unnoticed. I figured out I am intolerant to dairy, as countless others are, and yet I used to munch on cheese as my go-to comfort food... as countless others do.

BLOATING.

Bloating was probably also caused by my daily ingestion of dairy products, and was one of my body's cries for help. I did not feel bloated anymore once I started eating plant-based. The skin on my belly was softer at the touch and not as tense as before. People around me began asking if I had lost weight. I hadn't. It was just me deflating, lol.

SLEEP.

This is one of the most unexpected changes: I noticed I've been sleeping less, but better. I started waking up an hour or two earlier than usual, feeling well rested. Thanks to that, my days got longer, my mind got clearer, and my mood improved almost instantly.

ENERGY.

During the first weeks, I felt very energised. Must've been all of the vitamins suddenly filling my body! Who needs to get high when you can get the iron rush from a bunch of spinach, like good old Popeye taught us? Nevertheless, the energy sort of dissipated over time and I've been feeling pretty normal ever since.

POOP.

Oh no, it's poop talk! Fend yourselves, because I am not scared of being descriptive here. Long story short, I used to have frequent diarrhea before going vegan. Once again, my dairy intolerance most likely contributed to creating funny looking brown stuff. If I asked you how's your poop looking, what would you answer (assuming you wouldn't slap me)? And would you know what a healthy poop is supposed to look like? Welp, let's just say I've been proud of my toilet appointments since going vegan, because all I see are Pacha meme worthy sausages. Going to the loo is a happy time now, in comparison to the long minutes of agony spent with stomachache and funky smells.

FLATULENCE.

Can't have booty talk without mentioning the #1 cause of laughter among kids since the beginning of time! Farting is funny, but it is first and foremost the sign of a healthy gut. It takes a quick Google search to find out what farts truly are and why our bodies need to produce them. I confirm one of the most innocent prejudices against vegans - yes, we fart more than usual! But if you read into it, you'll only wish to do the same. Still, it is a largely acceptable change, and has not caused me any discomfort or unfortunate situations whatsoever.

CHOLESTEROL, IRON, PROTEIN, ETC.

Before going vegan, I had high cholesterol, high fibrinogen, low hemoglobin, low albumin, and a few other things that weren't importantly unbalanced. As aforementioned, I've taken several blood tests during the last year which showed ALL of the highs & lows quickly going back to normal. When I saw my cholesterol lower for the first time, I cried. I haven't had normal cholesterol for years, so, seeing that was nothing less than a miracle for me. As for my iron and protein, they increased! My fibrinogen was REALLY high, which could've resulted in a heart attack due to a vascular occlusion, but I don't risk that anymore. I cannot express how ecstatic I am to be considered medically healthy now. I wish somebody had told me earlier about the health benefits of a plant-based diet.

COOKING AND GROCERY SHOPPING.

I was never a big fan of cooking, because I was mostly just hungry all the time and I couldn't be bothered to prep meals or to even chop up vegetables. As a vegan though, I was kind of forced to look at recipes in the beginning - I was pretty lost and didn't know what to cook! Well, vegan cooking turned out to be much easier than I thought. I remember my first vegan grocery shopping experience: a whole new world opened up in the mall. I had never looked at the veggies and fruits and legumes and seeds and cereals section properly before! It was ENORMOUS! Boxes and bags and baskets of wonderfully colored food, most of it really cheap (especially legumes); with half of the money that I used to spend on cheese and meat, I had double the amount of food in my shopping cart and I was so ready to start cooking. The more I cooked, the quicker my cooking skills drastically improved and I have so much fucking fun in the kitchen now! I made countless vegan meals and cakes, loved by everybody (non-vegans asked for recipes more than once!), even by my mother! She used to slaughter chickens and had never baked a cake without eggs before, and yet, she admitted that this way of eating is fantastic and convenient. After a few months, she praised my hair and skin because it looks brighter and healthier. As a matter of fact, I feel nourished and full most of the time. Most importantly, I began to feel grateful and to think of food as a way of loving myself and nurturing my body, rather than a mere matter of taste.

SOCIETY.

The problem with being a vegan in a human society is... other people. It is always, undoubtedly other people who will come @ me with their weird, uncalled for, and rude anti-vegan claims as soon as somebody ELSE reveals that I am a vegan. I swear to god. I have no idea where we picked up the scenario of the 'annoying vegan' because the truth is actually the opposite... it is others who annoy ME... whenever they asked questions, I was happy to answer and explain stuff, because I genuinely thought that they were interested and would have liked learning something new, just like I would've felt if they had talked to me about something that they are passionate about. But nope, the real reason why most people asked me questions was to 'debunk' what I would say and feel like they won the argument. Even though it wasn't an argument at all. It wasn't long before I started noticing the patterns, the same old questions asked, the same rebuttals, over and over, in an endless cycle of going nowhere. So I simply learned how to differentiate the 'gotchas' from the rare, decent people who truly want to know more about veganism. As for going out and eating out, it wasn't as hard nor as expensive as I anticipated. We now live in a very vegan friendly time, there are vegan alternatives to basically everything. I feel extremely lucky to be a vegan now, because I can't even begin to imagine how hard it would've been years before.

PEACE OF MIND.

There is a duck pond nearby and I often take walks through it. Sometimes I sit on a bench, look at the beautiful birds and their dreamy plumage, and I... appreciate them. Not for their meat, like I used to. I can't even fathom seeing those creatures as food now. I appreciate them as individuals, who dream, love, dance, think, sleep, bond with their kin... I feel at peace with animals and nature on a whole other level. I realized how wrong it felt to eat a steak and then pet my dog. I learned so much about animal agriculture, nutrition, human rights, environmentalism… and I have so much more to learn yet. It takes one heartfelt glance into an animal's eyes, to be reminded that we are all the same. I am honored to get to choose not to be cruel to them.

[octuscle]

I'm a dad of 2 boys. My eldest is 22 and my youngest is 18. My younger son has some problems with a bully in his school and I want to help him but I don't know how. A friend of mine told me about your support and I hope you've an idea. Looking for to hear from you soon

One possibility is for me to do a bit of biographical work on your younger son… He is 18 years old. When his older brother turned 18 four years ago and went to college, he started bodybuilding. And your younger son was incredibly fascinated by your older son's successes. He soaked up all the information on nutrition, supplements and training like a sponge. First he secretly trained with your older son's dumbbells and then soon started pumping iron like a beast in his high school gym. As a junior without an older brother at the same school, he still had to deal with bullies at first. But that was soon history…

His puberty set in quickly afterwards, stimulated by the training. With power! Shit, your older son was so jealous when his younger brother grew a beard before him. He had to get used to the fact that his "little brother" quickly had a more massive upper arm, that he lifted more weight when doing squats. Your younger son then started shaving his skater boy curls. The buzzcut made him look even older, even more masculine. Your older son then got his first tattoos to assert himself. Your younger son was so jealous. But you and your wife agreed: no tattoos before his 18th birthday. Well, that was a few weeks ago now, the tattoos have healed. And your younger son already has his next appointments at the tattoo parlor.

In order to keep up with his younger brother to some extent, your older son swallowed and injected everything that could give him a massive body. He had no chance against his younger brother's genes. Today, your older brother is a real steroid pumper. With roid gut, acne on his shoulders, he only eats pure protein. He's a senior in college and about to graduate with a degree in mechanical engineering. A good kid. Your younger son, on the other hand, is a natural. And what a natural!

Does that sound like a solution? Then I'll tinker with a preset and send it to you. Just import it, click on Activate and then see if anyone else dares to bully your junior.

It's 06:00 in the morning when you come into the kitchen. Your son is preparing his 20 scrambled eggs for breakfast. This is his second breakfast. He's already had his first dose of protein before his first training session. He playfully punches your chest. Shit, even when he backs off, it hurts. In his melodious baritone, he asks you if you slept well, what your plans are for today and whether you'd like to do a round of chest training with him tonight. The thing he just boxed against felt a little weak. You grin. Of course you're the father. Of course you're the older one. But anyone watching you might think that your junior is the man of the house. And no one would think he's 18.

You enjoy training with your son. Most people in the gym think that you can afford the most promising young bodybuilder in the whole state as a personal trainer. You both like to play this game. And in fact, your son already earns more than you as a personal trainer, fitness influencer and fitness model. In the back corner, one of your son's classmates is training his biceps. He doesn't take his eyes off your son for a minute. And he has a visible hard-on. "Hehehe," says your son. "Do you see that prick back there?" You nod, of course you've noticed the guy, the way he's checking out your son. Your son grins. "Four years ago, he stole my milk money. Today he pays me his daily takings as a bully to suck my cock." Shit, your son isn't just a personal trainer, fitness influencer and fitness model. He's also a whore. But you can understand that. You know your son's horse sized dick. You'd pay to suck it too.

Pic found @truevikingblood-blog

[ghoulangerlee]

Ohhhhh my god I feel you on this whole bc shot thing. I've been on it for a little over two years because I'm trans and getting my period was so bad for my emotional wellbeing I had to do something. I didn't wand an IUD, and I forget to take my medication a lot so the pill wasn't ideal. I was told by two different obgyns that they wouldn't consider removing the uterus becsuse at the time I was only 21 and ""What if you chsnge your mind!!!"" 🙄🙄🙄🙄 so I really dint have a whole lot of options.

On one hand I like not having to worry about the whole thing for 10/11 weeks at a time but on the other hand I also really like not having feeble bones! I've been taking calcium supplements but the pills are huge and I worry it isn't covering the issue entirely. I don't get enough calcium to begin with becsuse I can't drink milk and stuff, so I worry that it's a bandage on a knife wound so to speak.

Last time I was at the clinic for my shot I raised the issue again and the doctor there was like "wait you're literally trans and have no plans for children why the hell don't we just get rid of it????" And I'm just sitting there like why the fuck did the last two people I see not give me this option!?

Anyways I need to discuss the idea more with her but oh oh to get this fucking thing out of me....oh to dream....

Sorry rambling in your asks but this sucks and I sure hope we both get the cool fun and fresh resolution :)

oh my god anon, i feel you. i've been on it for...almost 5 years now? I think around August 2019 is when I started it finally. It was unfortunately the only option we could find for me. I actually can't have any bc that has actual estrogen in it because of my high blood pressure and the family history of blood clots. And like, at first it was fine and dandy! I was okay with it because after 7 weeks of a heavy cycle I was so exhausted and just ready for it to be over. And it's been gone! pretty regularly for the last several years.

Sometimes if I'm incredibly stressed it will sneak up on me but it's like, leagues better than it was. Max 3 days and barely anything at all. So, very manageable for someone who y'know. had it much worse (to the point it would cause my iron to drop significantly all the time).

I hate obgyns who refuse to do things because "you might regret it later on" like, no actually I think I'll regret having this thing inside my body I don't intend to use and having to stay on the shot for the rest of my life. I'm in a same-sex relationship, I don't ever intend to physically carry a child, I just want the thing gone lmao. I've told obgyns that in the past and yet they still insisted on telling me that I might "regret" it.

So, my surgeon did mention that viactiv is a good supplement, which is apparently a chocolate calcium chew haha. My biggest concern is that I have osteoarthritis and being over 30 now, my bone density doesn't come back as fast as it does for someone in their 20s. My doctor is also concerned about it too. I mean like also the weight gain is terrible too, like holy shit it's been the worst (strong ass bc, strong ass side effects I GUESS)

THOUGH APPARENTLY there is a bone density therapy that they can do which will help with keeping your bones strong. I didn't know about it and no one ever thought to mention it to me when they started talking about my bone density lmao. Normal Calcium supplements make me extremely nauseous and I can't take them, so I just stopped lmao.

And I think from there, that's when I sort of decided I wanted to look into getting rid of my uterus for good. Like, I don't plan to have kids, I don't need it. Why should I continue this shot, why should I keep putting myself through this.

Also, idk if you've experienced it, or if its just because I been on it for so long or if it's something else entirely, but in place of the period I just get cramps :) really bad ones :) it's great and what I've always wanted from bc haha.

honestly that's a good doctor, why haven't they suggested it sooner? Literally the surgeon I'm seeing is, ironically, the first obgyn I saw when I switched insurances and go to where I go now, and from the beginning she was like "you're in a monogamous same-sex relationship whenever you want the surgery we can just take care of that" and idk I wasn't in the right place then, I think, to consider it.

yeah it's a long process from my understanding, we're building a case right now, as my surgeon called it, gonna have some imaging stuff done, a few more tests and then we'll set the date and just. remove it. thankfully, no early menopause for me (ironically the One Thing i was most worried about?? I don't know, I've got so much going on, I didn't want to even consider dealing with menopause bc guess what the treatment for that is-- the same damn shot I'm trying to escape lmao) ANON!!! I wish the best for both of us!!! Let me know how things go!! (if you're comfortable!!)

[tiffanydraco]

In all honesty fasting sucks…

I’ve had a stale headache since yesterday, when I mean stale it’s like stuck at the beginning/end stage doesn’t get stronger nor weaker an comes on an off.

My daily weigh in I went down in total of 9lbs in two weeks since I started daily morning weigh ins. It’s hasn’t been a walk in the park. I reach 10k steps a day and at least 30-60 minutes exercising daily. When I’m hungry I have some liquid cals.

I know people say don’t drink your calories, but if we were in the business of listening to people’s advise we all wouldn’t be here with our 3Ds am I right? I drink my cals cause I feel it’s easier to get rid of the calories when you pee vs eating cals then you have to wait to 💩 to rid yourself of the waste. And if you fast sometimes it take a while for your body to want to 💩. Therefore you carry extra weight wondering why the scale won’t go down. I take a daily multivitamin along with iron supplements cause for some reason I am anemic. The vitamins also help with me not feeling tired. Low iron in the blood or vitamin D makes you feel tired. And I was always tired now not so much.

I stay out of the kitchen, yesterday my mom brought home some snacks from her work Christmas party. I didn’t eat any and I told her I’m a diet. No questions asked. But mannn did it take will power to not eat that fucking cookie. My thought process behind it was that it’s okay to not have one now, that it��s not the end of the world and there will be another opportunity to have one at a later date 🤷🏼‍♀️.

Currently in bed trying to get out of it and make some coffee and finish wrapping gifts.

✨ I will reach my goal weight in 2024 ✨

I know you can too 💗

[viralstars]

Quick lil update on life in general under the cut

Those of you who know my husband have already seen him posting about part of his issues, so I'm not going to go into much detail there. He starts treatment tomorrow morning. I'm hoping this goes well, because he's been through so much already... He's had a really, really rough couple of years.

Meanwhile, I'm having health problems of my own. My doctor started me on iron supplements for anemia, and on a recent recheck of my bloodwork, my iron levels are actually worse than they were when I was diagnosed about six weeks ago, so we have to figure out what's going on there.... Meanwhile I'm just tired and cold constantly, which is great.

On top of that, my grandmother, who lives with my parents and I help care for, fell a few weeks ago and was hospitalized for three days, after which she was discharged to a rehabilitation facility... She's being sent back to my parent's house at the end of this week, so I'll be back to looking after her... She also fell three more times at the rehab facility for a total of five falls in the last month, so I really don't know how much her care needs are going to have changed until she gets back. She's under hospice care (she's 98), so at least we have other services in place, but it's still a lot.

AND because my life couldn't get any crazier.... My grandfather on the other side of the family was just moved into a nursing home and placed under hospice care as well. I went to see him yesterday, and he's in good spirits, but very clearly approaching the end of his life. So I have two of my three remaining grandparents who currently aren't doing well, and we're just kind of... Taking that as it comes.

I'm also working full time, which is fine because that's nothing new, but on top of everything else that's happened, plus my own mental health bullcrap? It's a lot.

Point is? I'm here. I'm still interested in writing with all of you. But life is hectic and while I continually have the best intentions of getting as much done as I can, I can't always guarantee how much that's going to be. I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everyone's patience, since I can't really say with any degree of certainty when the chaos is going to let up.

If we're mutuals, you're always welcome to ask for my Discord-- I can't generally do much on tumblr while I'm at work but I can answer discord messages and things between phone calls, and I will absolutely be glad to talk to you there.

[cbk1000]

Part two, because I actually hit the character limits on the first post.

I start the ibuprofen. I am feeling awful. My chest is burning really badly, like terrible heart burn, I'm weak, I have barely any appetite, and I'm so uncomfortable I can only sleep a couple of hours every night, which makes me feel even shittier. I have Mr Jenn pick me up some sleep aids which fortunately knock me out for a bit, so at least I'm sleeping more.

I'm not feeling any better and I'm reading up on pericarditis and some of my symptoms kind of sort of fit, but I'm starting to doubt this is the issue because for the most part it doesn't seem to share a lot of common features with other cases of pericarditis.

In the meantime, I get my period again. (It’s been a few weeks of this at this point.)

I start feeling even worse. Now on top of my other symptoms, I'm really dizzy. It's worse when I get up to go to the bathroom, but even lying in bed my head sometimes spins, almost like vertigo, which I've never had before. I'm so weak I can't stand up straight and can only leave bed to go to the bathroom. Mr Jenn brings me all my food and I have to eat it in stages because I'm too weak to eat it all in one go. I have to eat a bit, lie down and rest, sit back up, repeat till whatever small amount of food I can get down is gone. Wtf is wrong with me. I feel like I'm dying.

Something in the back of my head goes wait a minute your symptoms got worse after a couple of days of heavy bleeding and when you were 20 you had that episode where you felt really sick and weak after a blood donation and you had the same issues with your heart rate going really high, and that was resolved with iron treatment. Could this be an issue with iron deficiency?

I know from my lab results that I'm not actually anemic (as in, my hemoglobin is normal), so I start researching to see if just low iron can cause the same symptoms as anemia, and if it's possible this is the culprit, because I not only menstruate, I don't eat much meat, so my dietary intake of iron is probably not great.

Turns out every single symptom I'm having could be from iron deficiency. Ok, at least that's a direction to go in. I need to establish with a primary care doc, get an iron panel done, and also get a referral to cardiology, because I still need to rule out any issues with my heart.

It is very difficult to get in with any doctor locally; most of them are not taking new patients, and if they are, it's a month or more wait to get scheduled. Out of desperation, I go back to the clinic I used to work for, and, as detailed in other posts, get stuck with a crazy anti-vaxx doc who blames all my problems on the Covid shot I had in 2021. Neato.

But I do get my iron panel and referral to cardiology, at least. The iron panel comes back and shows that I do have iron deficiency. I start supplementing while waiting to hear back on a cardiology appointment.

I luck out and get into an appointment at the cardiology clinic just a few days after the referral is sent over, because they had a last-minute cancellation. I see an ARNP, who tells me she thinks the echo done at the hospital looks fine, actually, no sign of pericarditis, but just to make sure they don't miss anything, because my heart rate is definitely still abnormally high, she's going to do a seven-day monitor, a repeat echocardiogram, and then have me follow up with one of the cardiologists.

I wear the monitor and go in for the repeat echo.

In the meantime, I've been taking iron supplements. Over the course of three weeks, I start slowly but steadily improving: after about a week, the chills and dizziness go away. The fatigue and brain fog have also suddenly improved significantly. The full-body weakness that was so bad I couldn't stand up straight, and Mr. Jenn had to carry a pillow out to the couch for me because I was too weak to lift it, starts to improve gradually day by day. I can start talking like an almost normal human again (I would get so out of breath and weak doing it that I couldn't speak at a normal volume, and had to limit what I said; Mr. Jenn said I was starting to sound like Stevie from Malcolm in the Middle, for anyone who understands that reference). I'm coming out of the bedroom in the evenings to visit with Mr. Jenn a bit while he cooks dinner.

Then I get my period again. The absolute cunt. The bellend. The fucking devil. I don't go back to square one, but I definitely take a couple of steps back in my recovery. My period is a bit lighter, though.

I start to slowly claw my way back from my period. My heart rate is still too high and I struggle being up for very long because of it, but I am still doing better overall. I also still have intense nausea off and on (after some reading, this seems to have been caused by low oxygen? Basically, not having enough iron meant I wasn't getting enough oxygen on a cellular level because there wasn't enough iron to transport it around my body, so my whole body went, 'We can't breathe, and you are going to Suffer for it.' It's not as common a symptom as, for instance, fatigue, but apparently low iron CAN cause loss of appetite and nausea, which I did not know. I thought it might be the supplements at first because iron is notoriously hard on your stomach, but I'm still taking them and at this point I haven't had any nausea in probably at least a month, so I think it was a symptom of the iron deficiency itself).

I see the cardiologist. Cardiologist tells me my heart is in great shape, actually. The echo shows structurally there's nothing wrong with it, and my heart monitor was super clean. Cool. I didn't think my heart was the problem at this point, but good to know I'm not in heart failure or something as an athletic woman in her 30s.

I go back to crazy doctor to say I really want to focus on getting my iron levels up, since that has been helping a lot, and since now we know it's not my heart causing my problems and that I don't have, and never had, pericarditis. Perhaps we could do something to speed it up a bit so I can go back to my job and my life. Like, I dunno, iron infusions.

Crazy doctor, as detailed in another post is not happy that cardiology did not validate his conspiracy theories about how The Jab destroyed my heart and life. He decides I have both chronic fatigue syndrome and POTS (postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome) caused by the shot, and is referring me to a neurologist to see if they'll validate his crazy pants. What the fuck ever, I'll just continue treating myself for an incredibly common medical condition, then, while you diagnose me with multiple chronic illnesses based on symptoms I told you I don't have anymore.

I get on with supplementing while doctor dreams about Ivermectin or whatever. I reach a point where I have a few days in a row where my heart rate is much lower, and I can get up and walk around and feel like an almost normal human again.

I get my period again. I am going to kill this fucking bitch. My heart rate goes back up to 130 bpm on walking around, and about 112 just sitting up. I can't do either for very long when my heart rate is that high; even lying in bed, I can feel it racing, and clock it in the 90s (my normal resting heart rate is in the 60s). I try to take out the garbage and legitimately feel like I'm going to pass out. None of my other symptoms have really worsened or come back, but the high heart rate makes it so I can't do much without feeling like I'm going to pass out.

I am extremely frustrated and decide to go back to the doctor to ask for iron infusions to speed up this process. I had been tracking my iron levels every month, and while my ferritin (iron storage) went up nine points after supplementing for four weeks, after eight, it had gone down a point. It's just so fucking hard to stay on top of it when you're bleeding heavily for a week every month.