#i will give gifts and letters and hugs and small parts of my soul with all of them

[nerdylittleguy]

"my love language is physical touch" "my love language is gift giving" maybe my love language is loving. maybe I will do anything for you if I think it will make you happy. I will buy you gifts and give you hugs and reassure you and make you things. I will think of you and talk to you and indulge in intellectual discussions and quiet moments. I will show you my favourite calm forest and my favourite busy street. I will dress up for you and with you and give you the art and academics I carry in my heart. I will give you comfort and something amusing to bond over and show you something beautiful. maybe I just love deeply and there's no way to limit how I love you. I just love you so much.

[kaycode1999]

Hi!! I love your workk!! It's soo darn good <33 Hope you are doing amazing! So I saw you are doing matchups and I wanted a kny, jjk and bsd matchup (CAN WE PLEASE DO A MUTUAL MATCH UP 😭😭🙏!!)

Personality: I’m an ENFP. I am an ambivert. I love talking to people but also it sucks the soul out me. And by the end of the day I just want to be alone. I love trying something new (Always in for an adventure), but I absolutely LOVE to travel. I try to always be nice to people and make them comfortable with me. In my friend group I am the most chaotic kid (in college) I used to be the mom friend but now I'm just a chaotic kid who my friends take care of😭. Fun fact I also the youngest in the group and hence is it is like declared that I need to go to a mental asylum. I take pride in myself in being so funny that people are concerned if I am okay. I am also very VERY clumsy and forgetful. I also get distracted very very quickly. I LOVE LOVE FASHION! And Me and my guy best friend always judge fashion in our college. I am also quite dramatic (Unfortunate for my pookies, cause I have made their peaceful life a living hell). I also curse a LOT.

And I have zero shame, I flirt with my friend in every second line. But If I actually like some. ZIP! NO VOICE COMING OUT!

AnD HeRe CoMeS ThE TrAuMa~~ I have big BIG attachment issues. I am the only child in my family and hence have to be picture perfect. Like the best Miss world be feminine, independent, financially stable, get the topper grades, also always put family first, be polite, be the therapist you get the point. I have accomplished this to the point I am the prodigy child now. This also kind of made me good at everything but yeah CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT.

My music taste varies to the people I am attached to. Yes, this is why my spotify wrap is always a history book. It shows how many times I have fucked up.

I think my love language is almost anything, especially giving gifts and acts of service, Normally I don't like that much of mushy hugs and all thing but If I am really close to someone be it friends or relationship. Bro you are never getting me off. The clingiest mf you'll meet then. I will follow you like a god damn puppy follows its mom.

Pronouns and age: she/her, I’m a female and straight (male preference). I am 19.

Hobbies: I have a bunch of them actually, I just gain them like Pokémon's. Minor inconvenience in my life, BOOM a new hobby :). I LOVE to dance, I love to listen to music, I do play guitar and drums a little, I like to crochet, bake, cook, sketch, paint, Fashion. I also love to wrtie poetry and letters.

Type: Honestly, I love Introverted cuties, with a geeky side cause when introverts start to yap it the most cuties fucking thing. BUT with a sense of humor! I can also end up with anyone who matches my freak. But too well cause idk why i brother zone them. ( This is why i am never getting a bf)

Appearance: I have medium-length black hair and dark brown eyes, almost black. I have lush eyelashes and eyebrows. I also am 5'3 (It ain't that short). I wear glasses too. I usually in college have old money style and street style but as I have said, very diverse in fashion. I just don't wear too short clothes (those micro skirt and shit do not like, no offense if you like them (I AM SORRY) )

I wouldn’t like to get mahito, muzan or mori and fukuzawa ( I see him as a father figure)

Sure! I’d love a matchup!

By the way thank you for your patience with me getting this up and I hope your 2025 is going well!

I have a self matchup with all my information on my page if you want to look for it or I can send it to your inbox- either one

I match you with

Jujutsu Kaisen

Takuma Ino

BSD

Junichiro Tanizaki *not gonna lie a small part of this was just because I need him to be with anyone but his sister because 🤢🤮. We’re just gonna pretend that whole thing doesn’t exist*

Demon Slayer

Kyojuro Rengoku

All 3 of them do lean on the extroverted/sociable side, maybe not completely extroverted/outgoing but at least know how to socialize with people when the situation calls for it. but they all understand having a social battery that gets drained

All of them enjoy experiencing new things with you and also traveling

They are all kind just like you and like to make people around them comfortable

Honestly all of them find your chaotic nature humorous as well as have a caring and protective natures so they’re kind of the order to your chaos

It depends on the severity of your clumsiness, if you get hurt a lot because of it they will be concerned but if it’s not that serious they don’t worry TOO much. All three of them are in professions that mean they either know people who are willing to help you with your coordination or they can help you themselves so that you at least don’t get hurt too much *this is if you want to of course*

Rengoku and Ino specifically would prefer you at least get basic self defense training because demons/curses just because they want to make sure you are able to keep yourself safe

As long as there’s nothing worrisome or concerning/dangerous causing it they don’t mind your forgetfulness. If you want they don’t mind helping you by getting things like calendars or reminders for important things, or even other processes that might help- again it’s completely up to you though

They all find your love of fashion endearing

Ino and Tanizaki don’t care about you cursing as long as it isn’t in inappropriate times/situations. They don’t do it excessively themselves but still do it a reasonable amount

It takes Rengoku some time to get used to it because poor baby hardly curses at all except for one word here or there, it makes him flustered at first but once he gets used it to he doesn’t mind as long as it isn’t at inappropriate times/situations

There is probably some variation for all of them of them finding out you like them where they were confused or thought they did something wrong when you couldn’t talk to them but when they find out they think it’s adorable and unfortunately you will be teased about it

The good thing about your relationship with all 3 of them is that they are loyal, caring, and loving. They understand your attachment issues and make sure to help you feel secure that they aren’t going anywhere

Ino and Kyojuro in their own ways understand the pressures of feeling like you have to be perfect very well. They both put way too much expectations on themselves for either the same or different reasons so they go through it too. They try to help you with working through it just like you do for them

I haven’t seen anything about Junichiro that would make me think he goes through the same thing but he would also do his best to be there for you and help you work though it

They probably get you into different songs/artists/bands/genres maybe you haven’t heard before and vice versa

I get the feeling all three of them tend to be spoiling in almost all aspects; gifts, words of affirmation, acts of service, etc. but they all love physical affection so feel free to be as clingy as you want with them

They all enjoy seeing whatever new hobby you have and would love for you to tell them all about it. They all try to join in if and when they can because they take interest in you and your hobbies but obviously not everything is going to be for everyone. They also enjoy seeing the things you end up doing or creating through it because they are intrigued by it

I think there are similarities and differences with all of them that they are similar enough to enjoy your company but not so similar as to be a problem

I hope you enjoy it!

[fyonahmacnally]

Part 2: Things I Didn't Say - Kara's Response

Read Part 1 HERE

The night after Lena leaves for Fortune Bay - Kara’s apartment

She sits with her back resting against the headboard, notebook resting on her knees and several of her journals spread around her. There are so many things swirling about in her head, so many emotions she wants to convey. Right now, she simply doesn’t know where to start. How do you tell the woman you have been desperately in love with for years just how much your heart belongs to her?

She sighs. Don’t make it complicated, Kara. Start from the beginning, she thinks. 

She sorts through the journals scattered around her and finds the one from the year they met. From there, she marks a few of her poems and journal entries from some of the most memorable moments in their friendship. Once she has what she wants, she jumps up, throws some clothes on and rushes to CatCo to make some copies.

Leaving with what she needs an hour later, Kara gets back to gathering her thoughts, this time cuddled comfortably on her couch, notebook in hand. She writes and writes, not allowing her super-speed to play a part because she wants this to be real, from her soul without carelessness. There can be no mistakes with this, it’s far too important.

By the time she finishes everything, the sun is rising. Exhausted beyond functioning, she can barely keep her eyes open. Making the decision to get a little sleep before flying to deliver the letter for Lena, she calls Alex to let her know she would be unavailable for the day, only giving a vaguely brief reason. Enough to get her sister off her back and prevent her from asking too many questions.

After a few hours of sleep, a nice hot shower, and a decent meal, Kara extends her hearing to locate Lena. She tucks the letter into a hidden pocket inside her super suit, takes a deep breath, and makes her way toward Fortune Bay. As she gets close to her favorite heartbeat, she pauses to make sure the raven-haired genius isn’t inside her room so she can stuff the letter under the door. 

She’s barely cleared the hallway when she hears Lena’s voice on a phone call and her heartbeat exiting the elevator. Kara ducks into a vending machine alcove just in time as her best friend passes by her. 

Oh my Rao, that was close, she thinks, internally panicking at almost being caught. Lena’s voice gets further away and she hears the woman open her door, stopping mid-sentence. After a small gasp, she hastily wraps up the phone call and picks the envelope up off the floor.

“Oh Kara, you sweet, adorable alien.” The raven haired genius whispers as she hugs the thick envelope to her chest. “I guess this means you got my letter. Gods, now I’m nervous and also talking to myself.” She shakes her head and chuckles.

Kara smiles and sneaks out of the alcove to make her way back to her apartment, hoping she will hear from her favorite person soon. Sighing and trying to shake off her own nervousness, she bolts into the sky filled with hope and butterflies. 

Lena tosses her purse onto the coffee table, places her phone next to it, and drops onto the couch cushion with zero elegance or grace. Shaky, ragged breaths force their way out of her throat as she does her best to calm her trembling hands and read the letter she didn’t expect to get until she was back in National City. 

Blowing out one last shaky breath, she carefully opens the envelope, unfolds it and begins reading what very well could make or break her.

My Lena. My Home.

Gosh. Where do I start? Your letter was absolutely the most beautiful, wonderful, perfect, and cherished gift I have ever received. Well, second most cherished. Your love, your presence is the first. Though, I wish I had been better about letting you know that in the past. Anyway, that’s not the reason for this. Rao, I’m a shaky, nervous mess, Lena! Even in letter form, I can’t get my crap together. Let me try this again…

Receiving that letter from you was unexpected. To read those words in your elegant hand-writing and to know you put your heart into those sentences, Lena, it makes my stomach turn somersaults and my heart backflips. Knowing you were in my apartment while I was gone makes my soul smile. You feeling safe in my home brings unbridled joy to my heart. I know my things were in the most loving, kind, compassionate hands and my sanctuary was well cared for because of you. There’s no one I would trust more and I plan to make sure you know that with every single breath I take.

It wrenched my heart out of my chest to know that you were hurting while I was gone. I never want you to suffer, most especially because of me. My actions and my cowardice have caused you too much pain already. For that, I will always, forever be regretful. You deserve nothing but the best of everything in this universe and the next. I hope I can help give it to you. 

The Phantom Zone was dark. It was lonely. It was like reaching into the depths of your worst fears and nightmares and watching them play out in front of you on a loop. So many times I thought my worst fear and most terrifying nightmare would be to relive the destruction of my planet, to lose my family over and over again. It wasn’t. The vision that played, over and over again, while I was trapped in that dreadful place, was losing you. Every single time, no matter what I did or how hard I fought, I lost you. You took your last breath in my arms so many times it made me want to die alongside you. It made me realize a lot of things. Like you, I realized there are so many things I should have said. So many times I should have let you know how I felt. How I feel. 

But, we cannot change that now, can we? We can do better though!

I’m glad you found that sketch. It’s one of many I have done of you over the years, but I think it’s probably my favorite. I still remember that night vividly and it replays in my mind often. We were having a game night and you were in a conversation with Alex about some science-y thing, as usual. You were both grinning about something and then you said something that made my sister recoil with a scowl on her face. Whatever you said that caused the reaction made you laugh and throw your head back with your dimples adorning your cheeks. That moment stopped me in my tracks. It stole the breath from my lungs. It was hands-down one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. A moment, one of the many, that I knew I loved you. That what I felt was far more than just friendship, even if I didn’t understand it yet.

Well, I suppose I should move on to the items attached to this letter and why I chose them specifically. You see, there have been so many moments over the years where I have felt and done things that I should have realized meant more than friendship. Looking back and reading through my old journals, I realized I’ve always been drawn to you. You’ve alway been the one person that makes me stronger. You’re my Lena and I can’t let you go. Losing you and your presence in my life, weakened me and I lost myself in more ways that I can explain. I will do whatever it takes to keep that from ever happening again. 

You’re right, there are so many things we need to say to each other. There are so many things we need to talk about and I look forward to that day. I hope the words you read in the next few pages shed some light on how much you mean to me, how ingrained you are in my life, and how very much my heart belongs to you.

Here are some journal entries and poems I’ve written over the years. Each of these were penned with you in my heart and on my mind. I was always so scared to ever let you know how deeply into my soul you had burrowed. Every time my feelings for you would overwhelm me or you would do something to make my battered heart reach for yours, I poured those feelings into my writing. 

I’ve never shared them with anyone. Until now. So here goes nothing. 

I love you too, Lena.

I am in love with you and think I always have been.

Come back home so I can show you how much.

Love now and always,

Kara

Her jaw is slack, her eyes are wide, and her cheeks are drenched in tears. Could it really be true? Does Kara love her back? Does she really feel the same? It says so in the superhero’s own handwriting. She’s dreamed many times that maybe Kara could love her too. 

And now? Now it’s real. It’s on paper. Sitting right in front of her. 

A smile crawls across her lips, her face scrunched and tears still streaming down. Joy is dancing in her chest and the warmth of love flowing through her veins. Never in her life has she felt so fucking alive. Maybe, just maybe, she might get the life she wants. At least whatever happens, Kara loves her. 

She wipes the tears from her cheeks and turns the page to read what her beautiful Kara has chosen for her. To get a glimpse into the thoughts of her favorite person? It’s an honor and a privilege she doesn’t take lightly.

One last deep breath and no turning back.

Each entry is followed by a poem I wrote and some notes from current me. :) It was fun to go back and add thoughts as I remembered what was happening. Sometimes the poems were from the same time I wrote the entry, others it was something I wrote and just tucked into the journal. Regardless, they were all written for you, Lena. I hope you can see how much you mean to me. 

October, 2016

I met Lena Luthor today. She’s nothing like I expected her to be. She said a few things that really resonated with me. One of the biggest was that she is just trying to make a name for herself outside of her family. Boy, do I get that. Carrying around a family legacy (good, bad, or otherwise) is a lot on anyone’s shoulders. There’s something about her that makes me want to protect her. She deserves to be judged on her own merits, not that of her family. Just because she has the last name Luthor, doesn’t have to mean she has their morals. I wish Clark could see that.

Someone also tried to assassinate her. I told Clark I didn’t think she had anything to do with the Venture explosion and it turns out I was right. There is so much more to this absolutely stunning woman than her name. I look forward to finding out more about her. She’s quite intriguing.

Lena seems to think I would make a good reporter. I hadn’t considered it much before, it’s always been Clark’s thing, but she gave me the courage to give it a try. I’m glad I did. She changed my life. 

***Notes from now - See, even when we first met, I believed in your compassion and knew you were good. And you’re the reason I became a reporter!***

December, 2016

These past few months have been something I never expected. Spending so much time with Lena has been incredible. She’s so much more than what people think of her. She’s brilliant, kind, compassionate, and fiery, but there’s something underneath her facade that is apprehensive. Something frightened. She’s alluring and I want to know more about this mysterious woman. I’m going to keep trying to get through her walls. She said she didn’t come here to make friends, but I’m not so sure.

I can’t get Lena out of my head. The more time I spend with her, the more I want to spend with her. I’ve never experienced anything like it. Earth relationships are so hard to decipher! Sometimes I wonder if Lena is flirting with me or if she’s just naturally flirty. *sigh* I know she’s naturally charming and charismatic, but is there something else?

I sat down at my table when I got home from work today and wrote this poem. Lena Luthor – there’s something about that enigmatic, green-eyed woman that pulls me in. 

– I Believe in You – 

Anytime you’re feeling down

and don’t know what to do,

Look inside your heart and see

I believe in you.

When the world seems dark,

When you stumble, when you fall,

Look up, I gently offer my hand,

Help you stand firm, despite it all.

If you ever feel you can’t go on,

If things have become too much,

Simply reach out next to you,

Feel my arms, my hands, my touch.

Anytime you’re feeling lost,

Scared and confused by life,

Close your eyes and rest assured

I’m here amongst the strife.

When you need someone near,

Close by when your heart aches,

Know that I am always with you

No matter what it takes.

Anytime you feel alone

and nothing in life seems true,

Look inside your heart, my love

I’m always here for you.

***Notes from now - I remember the day I wrote this. You were having such a hard time with how the media always questions your motives. You helped save the city from Medusa and you still get fingers pointed at you. Even when I had a strange way of showing it, I always believed in you.***

February, 2017

Lena was arrested. I’m still in shock about it. I can’t believe Maggie wouldn’t listen. She was doing her job, sure, but she treated Lena like she was a criminal and I know she’s not. I’m going to prove her innocent. 

We proved it. I knew Lena didn’t do it. Once again, Lillian is trying to make Lena’s life a living hell. I swear, I will always protect her. She doesn’t deserve the animosity she gets. I hope our friendship helps provide solace, maybe even some safety for her.

***Notes from now - That day was hard. I still think about what it must have been like for you when Metallo took you and you found out your mother wanted to use you again. Even then, I always wanted to protect you.***

April, 2017

Yet again, Lena sacrificed something to save others. Jack Spheer. He’s gone and I can’t even tell Lena that she saved me because she has no idea that I’m Supergirl. She’s suffering and feeling guilty. And I’m a big fat liar. She sacrifices someone she truly cares about and I can’t even tell her who I am. 

I’m beginning to hate myself for the deception. I know she will think it’s because she’s a Luthor and I don’t trust her on that alone. How do I tell her it’s because of me? How do I tell her that I’m scared to tell her because I am scared she’ll leave? Everyone always leaves. How do I tell her that I don’t want her to see me differently? She sees me as just Kara and I cherish that. I’m so scared of losing her.

– I Wish –  

I wish I could tell you

how I really feel.

I wish I could tell you

but the time is not ideal.

I wish I could show you

what’s inside my heart.

I wish I could show you

with no risk to impart.

I wish I could make you see

just how much I truly care.

I wish I could make you see

everything I have to share.

Someday I hope you see

all of this and more.

Someday I hope you see

it’s YOU that I adore.

***Notes from now - Rao, I was so scared of losing you that day. I could see the pain in your eyes and I wanted nothing more than to hold you close, take it all away. That was the day I think I realized how badly I wanted to tell you my secret.***

November, 2017

On top of dealing with losing Mon-El, now I have to deal with Morgan Edge. He’s a rotten, vile, sorry excuse for a human. He’s framed Lena for poisoning kids. We proved her innocent, but I don’t know what to think about all the things that have happened. Lena told me she tried to kill Edge after she was poisoned and he tried to kill her again in return. Then Reign showed up and now I think Lena hates Supergirl. Am I ever going to be able to tell her now? She’s one of the most infuriating people I know, but I can’t lose her like this. I care for her deeply, despite what I keep telling my heart. 

– Despite What I Tell My Heart – 

I never meant to love you,

I never meant to care.

Love cannot be helped

And I know you wouldn’t dare.

Meeting you was unbelievable,

A friendship from the start.

But now it’s moving further

Despite what I tell my heart.

Losing you would kill me,

So in silence I must go.

Never can I tell you,

Never must you know.

Loving you is natural, easy,

Something I never saw coming.

If I had only seen it sooner,

I would have been running.

I cannot walk away from you

No matter what is said.

I know I cannot love you,

But must I leave instead?

I did not mean to love you.

Please know I wouldn’t dare

Jeopardize what we have 

Because of how I care.

Know I’ll always be here,

In the silence I will love you.

In the darkness, loyal to a fault.

To you, always true.

***Notes from now - Yet another time when I was terrified of losing you. I was incredibly confused during that time. Losing Mon-El, getting jealous watching you and James attempt to…whatever that was, and navigating growing feelings for you that I didn’t understand. Then Reign showed up and things changed drastically. Looking back now, I realize that poem isn’t about what I initially thought. It’s clear that poem was about my feelings for you and my desperation to run from it.***

Lena pulls the crinkled papers into her chest and wipes the tears from her eyes again. Things feel surreal. These little glimpses into Kara’s thoughts and gods, the poetry. She doesn’t know what to do with all of the emotions swirling around in her head and heart. 

She takes a deep breath and sits the letter on the coffee table in front of her. She needs to take a break to collect her thoughts. Heading to the bathroom, she takes a moment to change into something more comfortable, pulls her hair back, and washes her face. Once she feels a little better, she heads back into the suite and pours herself a couple fingers of scotch before settling back into the couch.

She sifts through the remaining pages of the letter. Only a few more journals before there’s another handwritten letter from Kara. Part of her wants to skip the remaining journals and jump directly to the letter, but she knows she won’t. She has to admit the fact that Kara wrote poetry about her makes her chest feel warm and smile so hard her cheeks hurt. 

The fact that Kara loves her back still doesn’t seem real. It also makes her want to see the blonde, but she knows she needs to wait. So, she sighs and picks the letter back up, her heart fluttering in anticipation as she dives back in.

My Lena,

There were so many journal entries to choose from. The ones I have chosen before now are for obvious reasons, they were moments that meant something and moments that made me realize how much I cared. I will let you read more of the journals for the years in between the next time I see you, if that’s what you want, but for now, I leave you with two more entries, poems, and one final poem I wrote just now. I hope they shed some light on what’s always been in my heart. 

Yours,

Kara

November, 2019

I’m heartbroken. Lena has known for weeks about my secret identity. Lex told her before he died. My worst fears have come true. I’ve lost her because of my cowardice. She trapped me in Kryptonite at the fortress and stole Myriad. I’m not sure what else to say except that I won’t give up on her. She’s not like the other Luthors. She’s not a bad person. I don’t know what I am going to do without her. 

The worst part is…I think I might love her more than a best friend. What am I supposed to do with that now? 

– I Could Love You –  

I could love you, but

I don’t think I will.

I could love you, but

The wounds wouldn’t heal.

Your smile warms my heart.

Your laughter brightens my day.

Your presence makes me happy.

What else can I say?

I could love you, but

My heart is in a cage.

I could love you, but

My life is full of rage.

Your scent makes me dizzy.

Your touch steals my breath.

You mean so much to me.

Do you know the depth?

I could love you, but

I think I already do.

I could love you, but

It’s too late ‘cause it’s true.

I could love you, but, nevermind, I do.

***Notes from now - That day and those weeks after the incident at the fortress made me realize how much I loved you. It wasn’t until I lost you that I truly realized how much. I have regretted so many things, but hurting you and withholding my truth, that’s something I will spend the rest of my life atoning for.***

August, 2021

Trying to acclimate to being back in National City after the Phantom Zone is strange.  Being without my powers and in the dark for so long, the noises and lights of the city are overwhelming. I’ve been finding myself listening to Lena’s heartbeat a lot. I feel guilty about it because it feels like a violation of her privacy, but I’m not doing it on purpose. It’s like my mind subconsciously does it. Can’t say that I am upset about it since her heartbeat has always been a comfort to me. 

The first week back has been okay. I’m still struggling with what is real. Having Lena back in my life feels like a trick and I am so scared that I am going to wake up and she’ll be gone again. My emotions are a raging storm of turmoil, my sense of stability doesn’t feel solid. It makes me wonder when the storm will pass. Most of all, I hope and pray that Lena can be the light at the end. 

–STORMS –  

It’s raining. Heavy, torrential downpour.

Suffocating, dreary, and oh so cold.

The sky is almost black. Ominous.

Thunder and lightning – so bold.

The storm is raging on, seems endless.

Wind is howling, trees swirling, bent.

It sounds like creatures unknown…

Of darkness and nightmares sent.

There is no sign of lightness.

No brightness to be had.

Searching in vain for reprieve.

When did it get this bad?

Just when there seems no hope,

Just when all seems lost, gone,

A spot of light appears again.

In the darkness shone.

Storms and darkness will come.

Light seems to never gain.

BUT, the inevitable truth is…

EVERY storm runs out of rain.

***Notes from now - Adjusting after the Phantom Zone was hard. You helped me in more ways that you know, just by being in my life. You have always been a grounding force for me and a light in the darkness of my losses. Thank you for being you, Lena Luthor.***

I hope this has at least given you an idea as to how much you have meant to me since the day we met. Even though my actions sometimes seemed contradictory, you have always been an important part of my life. You’ve always made me braver, stronger, and let me be who I am without judgment. I hope you know that now, but if not, I promise you that I will make it up to you.

I’m going to wrap this up now since I feel like I’ve bombarded you with a lot already, but just know I do have one more gift to give you. I wrote this for you just before sealing this envelope and delivering it. I hope you like it and I hope you truly understand how very much I love you. 

– My Gift –  

The wrapping may be worn,

The appearance may be dull.

Time has beaten it down,

Life has taken its toll.

Still…badly worn and severely dull,

Carelessly beaten and broken apart…

Despite its appearance, my love,

I give to you my heart.

She sits silently, the pages of the letter on her lap and tears streaming down her cheeks. Stunned. She’s often wondered if Kara had feelings for her as well. There were times it seemed so, but the blonde would always say something like ‘that’s what friends are for’ and confuse her, making her think otherwise. Now though, it seems like Kara has felt the same about her for just as long. Knowing that, she wants nothing more than to see the blonde. And not just see her, she wants to know what it feels like to press their lips together.

It’s at that moment she realizes that she doesn’t want to be away from Kara anymore. She wants to wrap her arms around her hero and hold her close. So she tosses the letter onto the table and flips the face of the watch on her wrist. She pauses for a moment, debating on whether she should just send a text or press the button.

In the end, she does both. She presses the button right as she sends the text asking Kara to come to her. She’s ready to move forward with her life and this feels like the first step. Waiting any longer just seems like torture because she knows she’s about to experience her last first kiss. 

[deblklesb]

[Happy Christmas Eve! — Abby × Reader]

[fem!reader, christmas theme, fluff/soft with some sexual content (not enough to be a smut), established relationship]

Summary: Reader makes Abby a stocking and gives her a gift

a/n: don't mind me, I'm just making something to feed my soul with Abby fluff and fulfill Abby's wish of someone making her a stocking

cw: little sexual content by the end

! Reblogs are extremely appreciated !

"Can I open it now?" Abby asked from the living room, her voice reaching you through the apartment.

"No! Just one second!"

"Come on!" Her voice had a grumble tone, you almost could see her pouting. "That's not good girl behavior"

"You'd know", you snorted, finally finishing the adjustment on your garments. You hid the things behind your back, walking back in the living room patiently. "If you were Santa, where in this house you'd find good to see a stocking?"

"What?"

"We don't have a fireplace", standing in front of the blonde woman, you saw her frowning her eyebrows, absolutely lost on the subject. "You can open now"

Abby did it, and took her some seconds to absorb the view. You had a Christmas cap and a green big shirt covering your body until the middle of your thighs, underneath just a red lacey panties that she couldn't see yet. A grin on your lips denounced how you're up to no good, but she decided to focus on how cuddly that day was slowly becoming with you.

Christmas were always a weird holiday after her father's death. As much as the people on WFL away made get-togethers on that period too, it wasn't the same. She would usually hang out with her friends and sometimes even play with the dogs on the snow, but apart from that there wasn't some type of Christmas spirit.

You too didn't had the habit of celebrating that holiday, simply because it never seemed attractive. The world was chaotic and a bunch of people died, and during the most part of your childhood you and your parents spent too much time running and surviving. It wasn't exactly fun. Then you found the WFL quarter and decided to settle. That was somewhere four years ago, and after two Christmas you started to anticipate de holiday with excitement. On the third year you were already planning you own traditions. This year you had Abby, and as much as she didn't had the same anticipation she also didn't said otherwise.

So there you were all smiles, a bubble of happiness coming from the single thought of watching the movies and eating the Christmas food the cafeteria had that time of the year.

"This is cute", her grin got bigger as she pulled you from your legs to stand between hers, and then you finally revealed what was hidden. "What..."

Abby analyzed the two stockings in front of her now, red and white fabric, her initial letter in one and yours on the other, in yellow. Small stars, mistletoe and snow flakes around. "What is this?"

"Stockings!" She grabbed hers, fingers tracing the details while she sit in silence. The difference on her demeanor made you stand still, waiting. What if she didn't like it? "I... I didn't knew where to hang them, so I decided to wait to surprise you..." Still not a word from her. That sunk a weird feeling in your chest, the doubt of making something that could upset her creeping you mind. "Is there something wrong? I mean, I know the sewing isn't perfect, but my mom taught me me just last week in a rush, and I also had a run, so it can be a little bit hurried..."

Abby finally looked up at you and her blue eyes were watering a little. She sniffed briefly, looking away and then to you again. "Yeah, the sewing is pretty shitty to be honest"

You stopped deadpaned, watching as a small grin came on her beautiful lips and she pushed away the tears. Then she startled as you punched her arm. "You idiot!"

Abby laughed pulling you on her lap and hugging your waist, feeling your arms wrapping around her broad shoulders as she kissed your neck over and over.

"I thought you hated it"

"I love it, baby", the few honey-blonde hair strands falling around her face made her even prettier, cute freckles and small scars adorning her features too. "Thank you", she bumped her lips on yours, accepting your pecks.

"I have other present for you."

"I'm starting to feel really bad because i just got one thing for you", the woman countered.

"You got me something?!"

"Of course! What kind of girlfriend do you think I am?!"

"The type to sexually torture me in bed", you said, leaning over the arm of the couch to grab a package hidden behind the corner table. The shirt went up a little with your movement added to Abby's hold, and that made her see the tip of your lacey panties covering the upper thigh.

"Dressing up all cute for me I might as well do it again", she smirked while pulling the green fabric up to better see the piece of clothing underneath.

"I thought good girls were well rewarded", you pouted, giving her the package even tho that meant having her warm hands away from your skin. "Maybe this can help you decide what to do."

Abby looked at you all suspicious, tearing up the wrappings just to see a box with the product image in the front. That immediately made her blush, glancing your grin. "How did you find this?"

"That last minute run I went last week with Nora... We kinda found a sex shop some weeks ago and decided to keep it to ourselves to explore and get some things before reporting"

"You call that good girl behavior?", you caressed her shoulders while she opened the box, seeing the dildo and the small textured gadget next to it. "What's this?"

"You put it on the inside part of the strap", she gulped, imagining what would happen. You lean on her to whisper in her ear "It's for you to use while fucking me senseless"

The woman threw the box away before grabbing you by the waist again, crashing her lips on yours in a heated kiss. You smiled between it, heart fluttering as the thought of a destabilized Abby on top of you flooded your mind. She would look so fucking hot moaning and trembling while railing you; your pussy throbbed just with the anticipation.

"Wanna try it before the party tonight?" She muttered as kissing your neck, hands gripping your thighs and ass and getting another smile from you, her voice was so fucking sexy.

"Please be gentle, I don't wanna look like I just had sex when seeing my parents tonight", you both chuckled.

"So why did you dress this, uh?"

"Y'know... Christmas tradition?"

"Oh, yeah, right", she grabbed the box again and handed it to you, getting up from the couch carrying your weight like it was nothing as you wrapped your legs around her torso.

"Showing off like that it'll be hard not to beg you to fuck me untill I can't stand." Abby making use of her muscles were always an arousing thing and on top of that you were the biggest simp.

"Well, you discovered my trick", she smirked, walking towards the bedroom. "Now let's get this to a test drive and after the party you can show me how much a good girl you are."

[dividers by @animatedglittergraphics-n-more]

[dragon-kazansky]

Sweet wonderful Andrea | Andrea Marowski

Part 1 | Part 2

It was a few days since he asked you that question. You had been mulling it over ever since. You knew going to London would change his life forever, but you really had no idea what you would do. You had never left Cornwall before.

Yet, the answer was obvious. You just needed the courage to admit it. You would be a fool to make stay and let the opportunity pass him.

You had never ran so much before. Your lungs were burning at the speed you were pushing yourself. You had made up your mind and you needed to tell him. Now.

You reached the house, gasping for breath, and knocked ever so urgently on the door.

Ursula answers.

"Is Andrea here? I need to speak to him."

She looks a little startled, watching the way you lean against the door frame trying to steady yourself.

"No. He went out."

You immediately try and think of where he could do. Turning on your heel, you peer down the cliff, but the beach is bare. There's not a soul in sight. With your new found energy, you take off.

Janet comes up behind Ursula in time to see you run off.

"What's that about?"

"I have absolutely no idea."

You're running as fast as your legs will let you go. The burning in your lungs feels so much worse this time around. You were definitely going to feel this tomorrow.

He wasn't in the pub, the park, the shop. He definitely wasn't waiting at your house.

Olga. He had been visiting her. You knew where she lived. You kept on running. You didn't stop, not even when friends in the village called your name.

You just wanted Andrea.

The house came into sight. The door opened and Andrea came out, a smile on his face. Olga was seeing him out.

"Andrea!" You called.

Andrea turned upon his name being called. His smile got bigger upon seeing you. You were coming at full speed, he opened his arms and caught you, almost falling over himself as you collided into his chest.

"What are you doing?" He asks, laughing at your frantic state.

"I made up my mind."

He holds onto your arms waiting for your answer. His heart was going wild in his chest, but it couldn't compare to yours.

"Yes?"

"I'll come with you. I'll go to London with you. Don't ever give up on your dream for my sake, but I will come with you."

He hugs you to his chest tightly. You cling onto him crying happy tears. There was nothing in this world you wanted more than him, so you were more than willing to run away with him.

Andrea kissed your forehead as you pulled away. He turned to Olga who was smiling at you both.

"Then gather your things. We leave as soon as possible," she said.

You smile at Andrea. He takes your hand in his, waves at Olga, and walks back to your house.

"You should go pack," you tell him.

"I only need two things," he says.

"Only two things?"

"Yes. My violin and you."

You chuckle at his sweet remark. You push him lightly out your door and kiss his cheek.

"Then go get the violin. I'll be here."

He grins at you as he leaves your house.

You pack a small case and leave a note by the door. You were off. No intention of coming back. You would follow Andrea as he followed his dreams, and nothing made you happier.

Andrea was back before you knew it. Violin case in hand.

"What did they say?" You ask, looking up at him.

"I did not tell them."

"Andrea... you must."

Olga pulls up outside your house, bags packed and ready.

"I cannot. I fear they will not like it. I will write." He holds out his hand to you. "I only need you right now."

You take his hand and bring it your lips to kiss it.

"Alright, but you owe them an apology for leaving."

He nods.

You both get into the car and join Olga to London. There was no looking back now.

Ursula and Janet found out the hard way. They had called the police, worried about Andrea's whereabouts. He hadn't come back for dinner.

Janet puts the phone down and turns to her sister.

"Well?"

"He was seen with Y/N and that Olga woman. They were getting on a train."

Ursula didn't handle that too well.

The letter didn't arrive until a week later. A lot had happened since then. The apology they deserved was written first. Andrea then went on tell them about how his music career would take off. Andrea was musically gifted, they knew that.

It was the last page of the letter that got them the most.

We are both very happy here and have come a long way. My English is improving, yes? Y/N continues to teach me. We have great news to share too. We intend to marry in the spring. An invite will be delivered to you when things are more certain. Please do come. It would be wonderful to see you both again. I haven't forgotten all you have done for me.

Best wishes,

Andrea

Ursula reads the letter over and over sometimes. The young man that washed up below their house had come a long way.

And now he had you with him.

Their sweet wonderful Andrea.

@ajeff855 @moonstuffsteve @sky-writes-stuff @lieutenantn @lostghostgirl94 @friday18eo @yaskna @my-blood-is-maple-syrup @gingerwriter97 @lunamooney2406

[mercy-burning]

Cold Feet (Alternate Version)

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: After receiving a letter from an old flame just days away from her wedding, Reader wonders if she should call it all off. —Inspired by the song Cold Feet by Tenille Arts Category: Angst (unhappy ending) Content Warnings: An almost kiss that isn’t with Reader’s fiancé Word Count: 1.8k

Read the other version of Cold Feet here!

MASTERLIST

***

She should be happily wrapped in a dream, Safe in a warm bed and sound asleep. So why is she walking back home From a long night down by the creek, With cold feet?

Y/N is currently finding it difficult to breathe.

It was easier a couple days ago when she knew exactly what she wanted. Her husband-to-be was more than excited to marry her, and she'd reciprocated that feeling entirely. Everything was ready to go. Truthfully, they could have gotten married right this second if that's what they wanted, that's how ready to go they were.

But now? She was questioning everything.

She still felt the thin paper in her hands, even with its folded body currently tucked away in an old book she knew was never going to be opened again- a gift from the man who'd written the letter in the first place.

The first time she read it, her heart sank. And by the third time she'd read it, her heart soared.

And then her fiancé walked in, asked her about what to make for dinner, and her heart sank all over again.

Honestly, damn him for choosing now to finally confess. Damn him for making her question everything, after she'd finally moved on and found someone who would always be around.

But then again, she'd ended up choosing to live in a house in their hometown, just blocks away from that creek he'd mentioned in his letter. So... Maybe she hadn't moved on entirely

She hated that she even had to think about it.

She hated that her thoughts were so consumed with this man she hadn't seen in years when the man she was about to marry slept next to her every night, unaware of the start to her inner turmoil. Each night since then, she dreamt of dances with both of them, alternating between the two until they made her choose which of them she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. And every morning she'd wake with an even bigger tear in her heart than when the old flame had burned it alive and left her alone in the aftermath to piece it back together.

Her fiancé helped her do that, though. Day by day he taught her to love again, to trust in somebody again, and he was truly a good man.

So why was it absolutely destroying her, thinking of getting married to him when there was someone else in the picture to think about? Someone who'd had a hold on her for well over fifteen years?

Again, she hated that she even had to think about it.

But she wasn't about to get married with all these conflicting thoughts, so whether she wanted to or not, her only real option was the one that would also be the hardest on her tattered heart.

She'd sent him a text message this morning that read, Midnight, and tucked her phone away for the rest of the day, drowning herself in mindless work and looking to keep time moving forward.

Now, she struggles to breathe as she makes her way down to the creek.

It's cold, having just rained fifteen minutes prior, and she wraps her fiancé's cardigan tightly over her her arms, searching for warmth and comfort. She would have settled for one of her own, heavier pieces, but in some strange way she thought maybe having something there that belonged to her fiancée would ground her, something to remind her of the gravity of the situation at hand.

Nothing could have grounded her upon seeing her ex boyfriend after all these years, though, especially when she finally shows up to their old spot and sees him perched on the big stump right next to the water, relief and joy flooding through his features at the sight of her. His smile is just as bright and familiar as she remembered, and it just about knocks the wind out from under her feet.

"Hi, Y/N," he greets softly, standing up and stretching his hands out over his legs. It's obvious that he's nervous to meet up with her after all these years apart, and she couldn't blame him in the slightest.

She's just as nervous as her feet take baby steps towards him. Meanwhile she's hugging her fiancée's cardigan around her body tighter than before. "Hi..."

"I... I can't believe you actually wanted to meet. Truthfully I thought I wouldn't hear back from you."

"Well... Your letter kind of rattled me... You rattled me. I guess I just had to know..."

There's a long pause before he takes a small step towards her and tilts his head. His words are hesitant, like he thinks she might say something he doesn't want to hear. "And... What do you know?"

"I know that I love my fiancé. After you, I didn't really think I'd ever love anyone the same way again, but... He makes me happier than I've ever been, and I... I can't just discard that feeling because you decided too late that you still love me. You know?"

"I do, Y/N, I really do," he answers earnestly, and this time his hand reaches out to grab hers. "But... I mean, you showed up here, didn't you? That has to count for something..."

She isn't really sure how to respond after that. It's true that seeing this man in front of her for the first time in years has brought back a wave of feelings that she'd repressed and even experienced with someone new.

But it's also true that with those feelings comes an inevitable aftertaste of bitterness. He'd left her, decided ultimately that his career was more important to him, and now that she has someone new he's asking her to leave behind this peace she's found. And for what? For him? What's to stop him from leaving again, or deciding years or months down the road that he'd made a mistake and gotten her to leave her one shot at happiness after him?

Nonetheless, she sits with him for hours, listening to him explain... Giving him a chance. He apologizes for the past, he promises to do better in the future, and in between he makes her laugh. Their hands brush, their breaths mingle as they huddle from the cold, and with every passing minute, the cardigan on her shoulders becomes looser and more forgotten.

Slowly but surely, he's lowering her defenses and gaining her trust. He's showing her bits and pieces of the man she fell in love with until they're laughing at close to 3am.

And then, for a moment, it's quiet. Absolutely quiet, save for the crickets and the soft rolling of the creek behind them.

Y/N almost lets him kiss her then.

But then her heart hammers in her chest, and not in a good way. Suddenly, she's imagining the pure heartbreak that would surely manifest on her fiancé's face if he found out- if she really decided to leave him for this old flame that had barely started to kindle once again years later.

She has to be absolutely certain of her decision.

So she pulls back and wraps her fiancé's cardigan tightly around her arms. "I should go home."

There's disappointment in his eyes, and it twists her gut a little. "Right... Um... I-I can take you back, if you want."

"No, I, uh... I think I'm gonna walk. I have to think."

Y/N avoids his gaze just quickly enough that she doesn't see the disappointment in his eyes fizzle into a tiny sliver of hope.

Rain on the sidewalk, doubt in her mind. One thing's for sure, she's running out of time To decide what's right, And who's heart she's willing to break.

She climbs into bed some time later, the cardigan still wrapped tightly around her body, and she can't quite bring herself to face the man sleeping next to her. It feels wrong, like somehow she's betrayed him by even thinking of spending the rest of her life with another person. She doesn't feel worthy of his love.

When she wakes up the next morning, she'd somehow ended up facing him anyway. He's staring at her with adoring eyes, and under his gaze she can't help the guilt that washes over her.

"Quit looking at me like that..."

Her words are grumbly and soft because of having just woken up, and because her face is half hidden behind blankets and his cardigan, her fiancé doesn't know anything is wrong.

Instead, he laughs. "What, you're beautiful... And before you start arguing with me, yes, you're even beautiful when you wake up."

She only grumbles, feeling anything but.

It's quiet for a moment or two before he speaks again. "You're wearing my cardigan..."

Peeking her eyes out from the mountain of fabric, she can see the enchantment in his eyes and it makes her warm. "I was cold..."

While true, she mostly means I had cold feet.

"Come here."

Two simple words, two syllables, and yet it's the softest declaration of love she's ever heard. Her body instinctively nestles into his, face going straight into the crook of his neck while he wraps her up in his arms.

"There," he says, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "You feel warmer yet?"

"Mhm..." She sighs into his skin and then takes in a deep breath.

He smells like home.

He feels like home.

And as he starts softly humming her favorite song, rubbing soothing circles into her back as he holds her close, Y/N wonders why she'd ever doubted her love for him.

He is home.

Spencer never was— he was almost always gone.

Letting him go is hard given their past; The good in their relationship was really good, but... it wasn’t enough. It isn't enough for Y/N to leave behind this new, pure love that had reopened parts of her soul she hadn't realized could be repaired after Spencer.

While James makes coffee in the kitchen, Y/N wanders to the bookshelf, gently removing Spencer's gift from the dark wood and swiping her hand over the bound leather exterior. The letter enclosed inside, handwriting that matches an inscription on the front inside cover of the book, beats softly like a heart.

Later that day, as she makes her way five towns over, that heartbeat slowly diminishes— until, finally, she drops it off at the local bookstore for donation, and it stops beating altogether.

And Spencer, somehow, can feel it. He feels it deep in his bones, that she'd given up on them— on him.

He feels the beating of his heart slow down day after day, so quiet and barely tangible, that once the day of her wedding finally arrives, it shatters altogether.

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[sly-merlin]

C l a i r. De. L u n e

Pairing : angel reader x banished angel jaemin.

Genre : plotless comedy, fluff, mutual pinning

Words: 1.1k

Warnings: it's suweeeet. Mentions of fire, hell.

Prompt : mmm..it's warm

A/n : part of SEXC WRITERS COLLAB consisting of members - @raibebe , me and @ncteaxhoe

This fic is dedicated to the doyoung to this haechan, rai @raibebe ! 🤍💚🤍💚🤍💚💚

Thank you for beta reading @lofied . God bless whatsapp!

Perched on the soft and velvety enchanted cloud, you consciously fluttered your legs, letting your naked toes play with the flowing water. In the middle of the majestic ocean, the spotlight of the moonlight drenched your pristine white wings in the ruthless glow as if it had been waiting for your arrival only. It has been many moons since you last visited this entrance to the human world. Until last month,at the break of the darkness, every day, you and jaemin had been flying away from your home to this place to allow yourself a taste of thia foreign sphere that your serene, plain, disciplinary realm never provided and today you were here, waiting for the same boy just to see his face, a sentiment, that according to you,wasn’t worthy of being revealed.

Nevaeh realm was indeed and quite literally a dreamer’s paradise but for younglings like you and jaemin, it lacked the delight and colour that oh so beautiful underground Nrub realm's fires showed. You attributed your attraction for that fiery hell to the white and cream that engulfed you in tranquil and also because it seemed unattainable for you, just like the thought of underground was supposed to be for all the unsullied beings. All things considered, underground was forbidden for everything pure, including you and jaemin. But nobody remembers the last time jaemin had listened and the last time you had made any attempt to stop him.

Eyes lost in the depths of the sea, you felt your right wing folding itself into your waist. Pausing your movements, craning your neck, you saw jaemin flapping his grey wings, a captivating smile wrinkling his nose in some unknown shape.

Grey?

You tilted your torso a little more to look at his ruined feathers.

"What in the fairies have you done to these beauties?" eyes widened in disbelief, you queried.

Shooting you his infamous fake pouty bunny teeth, he responded as his hands danced every way to exaggerate his pain,

"The underground isn't a place for angels”, he spoke with a nasal voice, “The smoke spares none. You should be glad you are seeing me in full piece."

"I thought you would have been roasted by now but you look completely fine."

The sarcasm in your voice was nothing new for him but he had begun to miss it. Awfully! Never in his wildest dreams had he imagined being at the other end of mother angel’s wrath.

Of all the younglings, him only?

Jaemin had been banished to the gates of underground for a few months as a penalty. Penalty for throwing mystic snowballs at the youngest son of the devil, which resultantly had him sick for a week.

"Make space for me." He pleaded and rolling your eyes, you extended the cloud seat with one twirl of your finger.

Oh how much he missed his baby magic!

"No one makes better clouds than you!" He exclaimed before sitting on the squashy seat but the sigh of relief that escaped him was something unexpected.

"What is it now?" Annoyed, you questioned.

"Even the underground gates are hotter for my buttocks. I don’t know how Johnny survives being the gatekeeper of that hellish place. It’s impossible to breathe in there, my wings are dirty, i’m grey, my hair have ashes in them, I no more look pretty, the little spawns make fun of me at any possible chance they get and because I can’t get past the first door, they don’t even hesitate while calling me brutal names!” he cried out with a pout.

"who had told you to play with him in the first place. their souls are weaker than ours jaem. Just because we can endure a little heat doesn-

"yangyang shouldn't have been wandering on the common grounds in the first place so it’s not my fault that i forgot about their souls or whatever. Nobody said a word to him but this beautiful boy was sent off without any apology!”

A giggle left your lips at his dramatics. He really had the audacity of acting like the purest being, which he undoubtedly was but he couldn’t look at his broken record of being a nuisance to the whole realm. Along with you and jungwoo of course.

“This cloud is so fluffy. No wonder you make the bestest clouds y/n” at the repeated praise, you straightened your back. Spreading your wings in their full glory, you proudly addressed him,

“Angel y/n, division third and rank second, jaem.”

“WHAT NO! CHEATER. WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN?”

“ha.ha. when you were busy being the assistant of johnny.”

Right then, you made a mental note for sending a gratitude gift for johnny. Had he burnt your letter, jaemin would have never met you today.

“THAT’S NOT FAIR. YOU ARE EARNING RANKS AND WHAT AM I DOING? EATING DUST?”

his statement turned your head towards his wings. The dirty ones. Raising your finger, you ordered him,

“get up. Let me clean your feathers first.”

“no!” he shouted again, “they’ll know I went out and Johnny would be in trouble with mother angel.”

Realisation dawned on your face and you slouched down, hands finding solace in your lap.

“I thought you were getting toasted. You seem to be happy with that johnny. Don’t you miss playing with us?”

The disappointment in your lyrics was patent and he felt something tugging his insides, something he had felt many times before and had chosen to ignore it each time.

A smile graced his lips watching your romantic face sparkling like the sheet of stars that he adored so much. ludicrous was his love for you, as jungwoo explained and he loved nothing more than being a fool for you.

“how can I be fine when that small place feels like those thousand firecrackers we once saw on this earth.”

“and you smell like that orange food place we visited once.”

“oh yeah? give me your hand!”

You screamed at him but he gripped your hand and planted it on his feathers instead.

“that’s how I feel when I’m toasting in there!”

“mmmh…it’s warm!”

Surprised, you immediately retracted your hand and hugged it closer to your chest.

“see! I’m not joking.” His lips were twisted grimly as he said those words. However tempting the other side was, he still didn’t belong there. it wasn’t home.

“let’s have a competition”

“what?”

Conjuring a few pebbles, you handed him half of them.

“stone skipping!"

Stilling the water just right for the skipping, you started with your stones and chuckles filled the quiet night with much needed happiness.

“is your butt cool enough now.”

Mindlessly, you asked.

“yeah. thanks to you, it is.”

Heaven: nevaeh , burn : nrub 😂 I'm not that creative plzzz🍿

A 🤏 feedback is always appreciated lovelies.

[maplecornia]

Chapter 3

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱: 3.06K

𝔤𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢: romance | slice of life | fluff | angst | bts x female!reader | ot7

𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: You watched them from the sidelines ever since you were a young teenage girl. Now you’re grown up, they’ve returned after 2 long years and everything has changed. What happens when you pull back the mask and find the darkness within? What happens when you see that they’re broken?

𝔞/𝔫: everytime I upload a chapter my tags increase LMAO i hope you guys are enjoying the story so far ^^ BTW when they're speaking and their words are bolded that means they're speaking in English just a heads up ;)

𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰: cliffhangers | angst | fluff | slight mentions of self hatred | depression | mental health illness | self harm | occurs in the year 2024 | set in a timeline where BTS went to the military together | slight language

tags: @kookaine | @fangirl125reader | @kookiebbyxx | @taradevonne

What is he doing here?

And whose clothes do those belong to?

You mouth his name, and in his eyes, you can see the surprise turn to shame.

The sick feeling in your stomach grows bigger.

You pray that you're wrong. That for the first time in your life, your intuition isn't correct. That what you think happened was merely a misunderstanding. That he didn't do what you think he did.

You want to reassure yourself that you didn't give up your heart in vain.

That he still loves you.

But everything points to the signs.

The fact that he only wears boxers, his smooth muscled skin shining in the soft moonlight.

The pile of mixed clothes on the floor.

The look in his eyes and the ruffled mess of his hair.

Everything tells you what you already know.

"What's going on?" you ask, your voice shaking. He doesn't meet your eyes.

The sick feeling grows deeper in your chest.

"What's going on?" you repeat, your voice stronger and more severe.

Even if your heart can't stand strong, at least you can.

He opens his mouth to reply, but instead, you hear a woman's voice from the bedroom.

Your bedroom.

"Babe, who is that?" you can't seem to look away from the door that it materialized from, as he looks between it and you, unsure of what to do. As though he were the one trapped. As though he were the one who was in pain. As though he were the victim here.

Instead of the murderer.

As she comes into view in the doorway, rubbing her eyes and running her hands through her hair, you can't move. You're frozen, and the world completely disappears, a roar of static noise rising in your ears.

No.

No.

NO.

This can't be happening. Not to you. You were so careful. You were so sure. So sure that he felt the same. So sure that he was yours and yours alone. So sure that nothing would be able to break what you shared. That you had finally found the one.

However, as she looks at you, her green eyes spark with realization. Then as they quickly turn to shame, she avoids your gaze as well.

You know.

This is happening.

It's real.

And there's no turning back from it.

You can't feel yourself as you start to cry.

In the shower, the hot water clings to your skin, mixing with the tears. You lean against the tiled wall, squeezing your eyes shut, you cling to yourself. Nails digging into your flesh, you bite your lip, shaking violently.

Mixed images of his face flash through your mind unwillingly.

Hiding alone, the steam surrounding you in a thick veil of deception, you give in to the pain.

You allow the tears to come.

You allow his face to stare into yours once more. You paint the same hazelnut gaze of his eyes. You try to recall the safety you once felt when he held you in his arms. You pull pieces of the same warmth that rose in your cold body flushing your face when he smiled at you, out of the depths of your mind. You look for the tenderness reflecting in his eyes when he whispered that he loved you. You sigh as you remember the way his curly hair had felt on your skin as you ran your hands through it. You picture his perfectly sculpted face, high cheekbones, and long eyelashes. The strong jaw and full lips. The curve of his throat and the touch of his body.

The mirage holds you in its embrace, makes you forget everything, all the pain, all the hurt, the betrayal that tore your soul apart for his pleasure.

However, when it leans in to kiss you, your eyes fly open to reality, and you find yourself hugging your body, the shower still running.

Shaking your head, you proceed to clean yourself, hoping that perhaps the water could wash away the pain.

Some things weren't enough. Some things are not good to dwell over. Some things are better left locked away.

In the end, it wasn't real.

None of it was real.

Done with the shower, you turn the water off, strands of hair falling in your face, and droplets of water dripping off of your body.

Was any part you enough to keep him?

Was this body?

Was it enough to have him wait for you?

Looking down at yourself, you press your fingers against your stomach, pulling at the flesh and skin as though it would change anything.

Were you enough?

Shaking the thought out of your mind, you reach for your towel as you open the shower curtain and step out into the steamy bathroom. Flipping on the fan switch, you dry yourself off, avoiding the reflection in the mirror. You lotion your body down, before pulling on your bra and underwear. Ignoring the drips from your hair, you tug on a loose T-shirt and shorts, and shake out your head, water falling everywhere as though you were a wet dog.

Sighing, you turn to the mirror, where fog from the shower is fading, water droplets trailing down like rain and making pathways. You follow them with your eyes for a moment before, in a sudden urge, you swipe your hand across the screen, destroying their peaceful journey. What's left of your reflection.

Staring into your eyes, you can see just how tired you look. Just how worn down you are. Touching just below your eye, the dark circles under your eyes from restless nights of tears and loss of sleep stand out like a stain on your skin.

What has he done to you?

This isn't you, this isn't who you are.

What has he turned you into?

Sighing, you turn away from the mirror and pull on your robe.

Drying your hair off with your towel, you pull open the door and walk outside, your wet feet slapping on the crisp wood floor as you make your way into the living room.

You look around for any sign of Jae or Miji, but they are nowhere to be seen. Glancing over at the kitchen island, you spot a small piece of paper. Taking it into your fingers, you read the neat block letters of Jaejin's handwriting. His Korean alphabet is so structured, so neat and so straight as though it were the writing of a computer. It reads:

“Hey, I’m sorry we left, but Mijeong prepared a surprise birthday dinner for me tonight, we’ll be back later so help yourself to make dinner or whatever. Remember this is your home now too, I love you!!”

You smile at the thoughtful letter and pocket it in your robe.

You had prepared a gift for Jae today yourself, but you'd reckon you'd just give it to him later.

Turning to the room you take a deep breath before beginning to explore.

The living room is very spacious, which you prefer. The TV is elevated on the left wall from the kitchen, the couch positioned against the right wall across from the screen. In the middle of the room, there is a cute small glass coffee table with forgotten magazines and books laying on top of it. Underneath the TV there are many different bookshelves with movies, books, and magazines shelved on them. All around the apartment, there are potted plants, cute decorations, and some photographs.

Stepping onto the carpet, you dig your feet into it as though it were the warm sand on the beach.

"I would have been fine sleeping on this floor, you know. This is like heaven." You murmur to yourself, closing your eyes in content. You wait there for a moment before the soft plinks of rain begin outside, knocking you out of your stupor.

Opening your eyes, you turn to the balcony's clear screen door and press your hand against it. Gazing outside, you smile at the sight of rain against the lights of the city. Opening the door a crack, you close your eyes, taking a deep breath.

After a moment, you step back inside and shut the screen door, turning to the kitchen. You pull out a pot and fill it with water before setting it on the ceramic stove and heating it. As you wait for it to boil, you pull out your phone and turn the notifications off from vibration. As soon as you do, you click on your Instagram and into the group chat you share with your friends.

Looking through, you can't help but feel a bit conflicted.

Biting your lip, your finger hovers over the message box before you quickly pull away and place your phone on the counter. Letting out a shaky breath, you swallow the lump rising dangerously in your throat before looking away.

You're sensitive today.

You knew it was going to be like this.

When you moved in the middle of high school back home, it was the same. Their lives carried on without you. They still had fun, they still had other things to do, they still had a life outside of you. Outside of you being there.

Things were different.

They were still your friends, they'll always be your friends, but they weren't the same.

Will they ever be the same?

When you hear the crackling of the boiling water, your head snaps up and you pocket the phone once more. You pull the pot off the stove and grab a mug out of one of the many cabinets in Jae's kitchen. As you set it beside the cooling water on the counter, you search his pantry for a cocoa mix. Normally you would have tea, but right after the sight of the rain, you're in the mood for something to warm you from the inside out.

Something to remind you of home.

On cold, rainy days after you and your friends would practice at the dance studio, or finish having a meal together or anything simple like that; you would hurry home and with your group, you would make them cocoa. You would start a fire and would sit with each other spending the time together, happy and complete.

The nostalgia and sadness growing too much, you are relieved when you find the hot cocoa packets. You let out a little shout of happiness and accomplishment before walking out of the pantry and dumping the contents into the cup. Setting the packet aside, you take the pot of water and carefully pour it into the cup as well. While the powder and water slowly swirl together, you rummage for a spoon before mixing it. Once you're satisfied, you sip it carefully and...

...almost burn your tongue off.

Coughing violently, you set it down and focus on putting away everything you brought out, giving it time to cool off. Once everything is done and put away, you pick up your mug, holding it to your face as you softly blow on it. Even now the smell and the warmth of it is getting rid of the chill you feel whenever you're alone.

Settling yourself amongst the blankets and pillows on the couch, you take the TV remote off of the coffee table and turn on the TV. Netflix pops up and you search for a K- drama you were watching before you left. When you find it, you press play, leaving off captions so that you can practice your Korean a bit more.

As the intro starts, you hum along to it, setting up a sort of bed so you can watch comfortably. Once it's done, you lay down, your head sinking into a pillow comfortably, and a soft gray blanket pulled over your body. You're in a position so that you can still lounge but won't spill your cocoa.

As the show begins, you mouth the words along with them. When you can't catch what they say, you're quick to rewind it and try it again until you understand. You laugh with the show, cry with it, finding yourself on an emotional roller coaster.

You've always been like this, too emotional, too easily attached, too naive. Always careful to keep yourself at a reasonable distance from anyone who could hurt you. From anyone who you couldn't handle if they left you. It takes a while for you to open yourself up to someone, and when you do, you're wholly and completely theirs.

It's a lose-lose situation.

A lose-lose way of life.

Before you know it, the cocoa is gone and the episode is almost over. Setting the mug on the coffee table, you settle back into the pillow. As you watch, your eyes grow heavy, and you drift further and further away. The last thing you see before you close them is their touching kiss before they flutter shut and you fall into a restless sleep.

Hours pass as you lie there on the couch, sleeping. The show continues to play until the question "are you still watching?" shows up on the screen as it often does when you've been watching for a while without much activity.

Once the show is off, the apartment goes silent and it seems almost empty. In the far background, there are the sounds of cars honking, the screech of tires on the pavement, even the sound of music from the billboards and clubs.

This is like home, these sounds are familiar. These are the reasons why you sleep so soundly, hugging the pillow as though it were your lifeline.

You do not wake when Mijeong and Jaejin enter the apartment. They are laughing, but as soon as they see you on the couch, fast asleep, they fall quiet, each one of them smiling softly.

They hold unimaginable compassion for you and deep love.

Mijeong immediately sets down her stuff, sliding out of her shoes and walking towards you. Tenderly, she brushes back your hair as though she were your mother taking care of you.

“She’s sound asleep.” She whispers, just as Jaejin joins her side.

“That’s not like her. She’s such a light sleeper, she would have woken up when we came home.” He replies worry reflected in his eyes. Mijeong’s smile, at his statement, fades away and she nods.

“She must be in so much pain that she wants to drown out the world around her,” Mijeong says sadly before standing up and clearing her throat.

“Let's take her to her room.” When Jaejin doesn't move, she gives him an expectant look and he jolts to attention. She hits him softly on his arm and he lets out a slight joking yelp.

"I was going to do it, I just wasn't ready yet." He whines, and she chuckles before leading the way to your room as Jaejin picks you up with strong, sure arms. Cradled in his arms as though you were a baby, he looks down at you with a tender look. He hates that he can't help you.

No one can.

He smiles how sound asleep you are now, cradled in his arms, your head resting against the crook of his neck. Mijeong, watching the encounter, smiles as well. He notices her look and his attention changes immediately from you to her in a second.

“What is it?” he asks, and she shakes her head, opening the door to your newly acclaimed bedroom.

“Nothing.” She says but a sly smile is playing at her lips, as though she’s concealing a secret. Which she is. A secret that, at that moment, she thought he would make a great father. A secret that at that moment, she wanted things with him that were far off in the future, but very real to her now.

As they walk into your room, Mijeong pulls back the covers, and Jaejin sets you down softly on the bed. Once you are out of his arms, and Mijeong pulls the covers up over your body, you settle instinctively into the soft mattress, and immediately curl up into a ball, holding tightly to one of the many pillows on your bed. They smile as they watch over you, and Jaejin presses a soft kiss on your forehead. Mijeong does the same, brushing back strands of hair on your forehead. Turning around, they share a tender look before walking out of the room and cracking the door shut behind them.

“Are you sure that she’ll be okay?” Mijeong asks as soon as the door is shut. Jaejin looks at her a bit surprised.

“Of course. Why, are you having second thoughts?” he asks before heading into the living room, Mijeong not far behind.

"No. I'm not, I just....I wish we could tell her before we do anything. She's going to wake up and we'll be gone." Mijeong explains, following him and settling on the counter. Jaejin pauses from setting the living room in order and turns to her. He takes her hand in his own and kisses her softly on the forehead before pressing his forehead to hers tenderly.

"I love you, and I wish we could have told her before we leave tomorrow, but she will be okay. She'll have the apartment, and my job at Big Hit to take over. Everything will be okay." He reassures her. Mijeong hesitates before nodding her head in agreement. Jaejin smiles, before pulling away and turning off the TV. "Besides, I'll leave her a note just like we did tonight before we take off in the morning. This is just too much of an amazing opportunity for you and for me to waste."

"I know." Mijeong answers, rocking on the counter as she swings her legs back and forth. "Not every model gets a chance to appear at Fashion Week, but Jae....she'll be all alone."

Done with ordering the room, he chuckles as he begins to make his way back to her.

"She is a grown-up you know. It’s only a few months, she can take care of herself." He says, pulling her off the counter and spinning around in the air before setting her down as she giggles and leans on him, a little dizzy.

"Don't worry," he reassures her once more before heading into their room, his voice fading as he closes the door behind him.

"Yen will be okay. She always is."

𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢: thanks to everyone who read! so why do you think miss Yen moved to Korea?

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I'm going to be updating my mutuals list (because I never had it to begin with ;-;) on my navigation so if you want to be added, pls ask me ^^ thankssss

chapter 4 here

check the Infinite Stars masterlist for more chapters

check my BTS masterlist for other BTS content

check out my masterlist for other kpop fanfics

[cherrynojutsu]

Title: Like Silver

Summary: A companion series for Like Gold.

Sakura misses him so much. She misses the faint smell of woodsmoke and sage, and mismatched eyes captivating in their intensity and unfathomable depths. The Rinnegan is beautiful, soft lavender ringed by hypnotizing layers of circle and tomoe, but flecks of silver dance in his right, tiny asterisms bewitching in nature, if one gets close enough; she’d first noticed it when they were children at the Academy. She knows they're Itachi's now, a slightly different scattering of luminaries aglow in the deep pitch of obsidian, but they're still as enthralling to her as they had been back then. She dreams of that silver sometimes, recalls it any time she sees something similar in color or reflet.

Blank period, canon-compliant, Sakura-centric, some expanded plot points from Like Gold, fluff and pining, eventually becomes a smut fest with feelings.

Disclaimer: I did not write Naruto. This is a fan-made piece solely created for entertainment purposes.

Rating: M (eventual nsfw-ness)

AO3 Link - FF.net Link - includes beginning/ending author's notes

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Chapter 1/?: An Introduction to Electrocardiography

Sakura gazes out the window of her office, a pile of paperwork set aside for a poetic sort of procrastination, trying to indulge for once in a Konoha spring, though she's finding it arduous.

As pretty as it is this time of year, all she can manage to feel is wistful.

Hanami has come and gone already for the most part, though there are a few stubborn cherry blossom trees lingering at the tail end of their blooming. She can see one here from her window, up on the hillside that slopes towards Hokage Rock, clinging to the uneven land. She’s sure its roots have to be all twisted, a labyrinth of gnarled wood clinging to any scrap of land it can wind itself around as its branches and petals try against all odds to reach upwards into the open sky that she can’t take her eyes off of.

There’s a metaphor in there somewhere, but it’s one she doesn’t care to unpack.

This year was her twentieth viewing of her namesake, though Sakura obviously doesn't remember the first few. Her parents take great pride in the retelling of tales from those first few years of her life, the ones she was too little to remember. The highlights come up annually on her birthday without fail, how she grasped at the petals like they were something precious, clutched in her sticky little hands the entire day.

A framed photograph is perched on one of the built-in shelves of her parents' living room, of her and her father on her first birthday. He was holding her up on unsteady legs, ridiculously proud and pointing towards the camera where her mother had been trying to get her to look. Her short pink hair was flying absolutely everywhere, matching the fluttering petals and in-bloom cherry blossom tree in the background, chubby hands grasping upwards. Strawberry cake and frosting were smeared all over her cheeks. They’d had a picnic for her, at the park nearest to their house.

“We came home and cleaned you up, and then your father helped you water your tree for the first time, in the little pink watering pail you unwrapped earlier. You were so cute.” That’s what her mom says every year. Sakura has the sentence memorized at this point, could recite it on cue, if she needed to.

Her parents had planted a cherry blossom sapling in their backyard a few days after they brought her home from the hospital as a newborn, so the tree is around the same age she is. She used to spend time under it often, as a kid, and some of her earliest memories involve sprawling beneath it to study the heavens while her mother gardened. She would also sneak berries from the patch when her back was turned. Sometimes her dad would join in her pilferage, and they would sit beneath the tree like a couple of bandits with stained lips, though those first few years she can remember he barely fit underneath it, as tall as he is. Many a tickle fight had been had, shaded by those branches. She would read books there on nice afternoons, when she was a little older.

The tree is fully grown now, also on the final cusp of its blooming for the year, floriferous wood expanded outwards to drape her childhood stomping grounds in a sea of soft pink. They have a picnic under it every year, in her family’s backyard, when they celebrate her birthday together. Her actual birthday has come and gone, but her birthday dinner is two days from now. Her parents swung by her apartment on Sunday afternoon for a bit with outlandishly large cupcakes, but her mom had mentioned they’d do dinner and a gift on their usual night, Thursday, since it works so well with their schedules every other week.

“We have to have your picnic, under your tree, like always. It’s a tradition! My beautiful girl. I can’t believe you’re twenty. It seems like just yesterday you were only yay high,” her dad had told her, gesturing below his knees before hugging her too tightly, ruffling the hair she'd inherited from him before they left. The cupcakes were strawberry with cream cheese frosting, one of her favorite treats. They’d left her with four extra to enjoy between then and Thursday, one for each day if she wanted it, turning her birthday into more of a week-long affair than a one-day celebration.

She and Ino had demolished two of them while watching some of the terrible movies they love to hate together, later that evening. It had been a smorgasbord of strawberries, really, because they'd washed them down with strawberry daiquiris, sugary sweetness topped with ridiculous amounts of whipped cream. They'd sat on her balcony, after, sipping a little tipsily and just looking.

"You should try to enjoy your namesake more this year, Forehead. You're so busy that I'm not sure you've realized, but you've really grown into it," Ino had said, beckoning vaguely towards a Konoha beginning to bloom, renewed with a warm breeze, spring ushered in by a fluttering of pink petals. Ino likes to give compliments in roundabout ways, she’s learned over the course of their friendship; crass as the blonde can be, she does have her moments. Her words meant a lot to Sakura, so she’s trying to take them to heart, to stop and smell the cherry blossoms, so to speak. It won’t be long before Konoha crescendos into the sweltering heat of the summer.

She loves her parents and her friends. She really does.

But birthdays are weird, Sakura thinks.

Last year, Sasuke had sent her a letter on her birthday. She’s reread it so many times that she has it more than memorized; it’s stitched into the muscle tissue of her heart at this point, or maybe scarred into the lining of her aortic valve, sempiternal markings adorning the tunnels that sustain her, causing her breath to catch every time.

Sakura,

Hanami has come to the wilderness in the Land of Honey. Bees are awakening and foraging for the first pollen of the season, with which to begin again. Cherry blossom petals are everywhere, lining the pathways and floating on the water.

Happy birthday.

-Sasuke

It had been short, simple, and even a little poetic; she had cherished it, as she does all of his other letters. She’d cherished the pressed flower with it just as much; a cherry blossom, neatly flattened with a precision that screamed Sasuke, near exactly the same shade of pink as her hair.

Sakura had started crying when she unfolded the paper to reveal it sitting atop his words. His hawk had waited patiently at her office window for a response to be written and tied to its leg, perched atop the windowsill and watching the goings-on of the village below, absolutely no concept in its predator brain of how much she delights in seeing it fly, a graceful tether to the boy - now man - she has been in love with for ages.

Cherry blossom petals are everywhere. Is there a hidden meaning there, or is she making a mountain out of a molehill?

She’s tried not to read too much into the letters. She's not sure if he sends any to Naruto or not; she's too afraid to ask, because she'll either get a heart-pounding hope if he doesn't get them, or a soul-crushing disappointment if he does. She can't imagine him sending a yellow flower to Naruto, but he may very well have sent him a different gift for his birthday.

Maybe he just thought she would like a flower, which she did - it’s pressed for safekeeping, along with all of his other correspondence to her, sporadically and chronologically throughout a book she keeps on her nightstand, An Introduction to Electrocardiography. It is her take on an album of small things she holds close to her own heart, things she wishes she could read in his. Sakura didn’t want to buy an actual album for such a thing; that felt too formal, for something as ambiguous as her ties to Sasuke, overflowing on her end as they may be. So she’d settled on a book about deciphering the heart’s tells based on science only, electrical impulses and repolarization, the sizes and positions of the chambers, how to diagnose conditions utilizing one’s findings. It’s one she doesn’t need access to anymore, extremely familiar with EKGs after years of study. She’d wanted it to be something no-nonsense, all hard facts and data on how to read activity plotted over time.

Evidence-based. Are letters evidence, though? She’s not sure that would hold up as empirical proof in any of the scholarly journals she’s studied or submitted work to since beginning her research. She thinks wryly, though, based on what she has witnessed get published, that scientific verification doesn’t always matter if you know the right people.

She’s thought many times sifting through it that perhaps it is too optimistic, too hopeful of a book subject for such a thing. Sakura has agonized over it, frankly, wondering whether it was an inappropriate choice.

...But now that they’re in there, it might ache worse to move them somewhere else.

It’s the last day of March now, and she didn’t get a letter this month, which is unusual, because she’s gotten one near each month in the time that he’s been away. She’s paged through the book a few times over the past several days, rereading and admiring the preserved sakura blossom, frozen in suspended animation indefinitely on a page about precordial leads.

Sakura hadn’t really expected anything from him for her birthday, other than a monthly letter like he usually sends... but this year she didn’t even get that. She’s trying really hard to not be disappointed. She has so much to be thankful for, in the grand scheme of things...

...But the petals of the cherry blossom from last year have faded over time, she’d evaluated yesterday, sitting in her bedroom. It might be like her, always pressed in a book, fading whilst stuck indefinitely between the boundless teeth of academia. There is always more data to record, more evidence, with which one can prove or disprove their findings.

No letter this month, though. Nothing to record, no new evidence.

It might be time to move the letters somewhere else, she thinks pensively. Maybe a place where she’s not tempted to look at them all the time; their placement in the book, small scraps of paper that stick out in only a couple of places, makes it easy to go back and reread them. She’s pretty sure she has an empty shoebox in her closet that she could move them to, in a pile rather than catalogued between pages rife with information and a fragile sort of hope. Maybe she’ll do it tonight, put it up in the far right corner of the upper shelf, shoved towards the back so she can’t reach it without the stool, so she’s not tempted whenever the next bout of heartsickness slams into her like one of Tsunade-shishou’s fists used to. She needs to go by the library after work first, to return some things, but maybe when she gets home, she’ll do it. She could eat a cupcake, too; that might make it a little easier.

Sakura misses him so much. She misses the faint smell of woodsmoke and sage, and mismatched eyes captivating in their intensity and unfathomable depths. The Rinnegan is beautiful, soft lavender ringed by hypnotizing layers of circle and tomoe, but flecks of silver dance in his right, tiny asterisms bewitching in nature, if one gets close enough; she’d first noticed it when they were children at the Academy. She knows they're Itachi's now, a slightly different scattering of luminaries aglow in the deep pitch of obsidian, but they're still as enthralling to her as they had been back then.

She dreams of that silver sometimes, recalls it any time she sees something similar in color or reflet. There’s an extremely unique necklace in an antique shop she visits with Ino and Sai from time to time, and occasionally on her own, over on the northeast side of town. It’s a salt-and-pepper diamond, dark grey with inclusions, dainty and set in what must be a hand-fabricated setting. It hangs from a silver chain, towards the back of a display case filled with other vintage and distinctive pieces, but it’s the only one she ever finds herself drawn to. It is so similar to his right eye, dark smoke near black, speckled with beguiling silver startling in its clarity. The bevel cut reveals new flecks dependent on the angle at which you view it.

Sakura studies it closely on each visit, because it is so hauntingly breathtaking and it reminds her of him.

Ino has said it’s not her color, and that she should stick to warm tones and gold, for which she is better suited; Sakura has not confessed to her why it catches her eye so much. Sai has agreed with his girlfriend on the coloring note, sensitive as he is to such things, but the way he studies her every time she tears herself away from it makes her suspect he knows exactly why it captivates her so. It’s been sitting there for years at this point; she has to mentally talk herself out of buying it on each visit. It’s beautiful, but she would spend far too much time gawking at it, and it might hurt more with extended study than the gentle tugging at her heart she experiences when she’s in that old building throughout tiny fragments of lackadaisical afternoons.

Sasuke has been gone for a long time. She hopes he's finding the peace he's been seeking, that he's seeing the world with new eyes just as he'd imagined. She thinks of him every day, sends out little orisons like petals in the breeze in the hopes that they’ll find him, wherever he is.

I wonder where he is now.

Try as she does to enjoy the breath of spring Konoha is right now, and her namesake as Ino said, all she can seem to do is shift her vision to the sky, hoping against hope for a glimpse of a familiar bird-of-prey that will stay an ample amount of time for her to craft a response, before it abvolates away for another month.

Sakura smiles, then, close to laughing at the absurdity of it all, because she is so predictable. She loves this village despite its many flaws and challenges, despite the things about it she and Naruto and Kakashi-sensei and Ino and even Tsunade-shishou, off in the Land of Wind, are trying to change, but even after so many years, she’s still pining for something beyond it, something in the wilds of the sky just beyond her reach.

There’s always next year, she supposes, pupils drawn again towards the outstretched branches of the cherry blossom tree on the hill, before trailing her eyes along further. She can grow a little more to try to reach him. When she was little, she had wanted to grow tall so she could try to touch a star, like the branches of the tree in her backyard did when she and her father laid beneath them on balmy summer nights. He would tell her ridiculous stories about all of the constellations, things she knew had to be untrue, even at the ripe age of five. Precocious, he’d always called her, but in the loving, joking manner he had.

Her gaze follows the horizon, leisurely taking in the rest of her home. It really is a lovely day, despite her yearning. Spring is here again, and today's is a gentle sunset, one last little bit of sunlight with which to conclude March. The temperature is already spiking, unusually warm for early spring, but summers in the Land of Fire are always hot. She really should finish her paperwork, but it’s hard to find the motivation just yet.

Something possesses her, then, to turn her neck more, take in more of the skyline's continuation. She wants to see all of it.

And then Sakura’s eyes fall on an achingly familiar figure cloaked all in black, perched only a roof away and observing her, and she thinks she must have nodded off, because she has to be dreaming.

She subtly pinches herself in the millisecond of time that follows, but she is very much awake.

The words are blooming out of her throat before she can even process what’s happening, exultation sinking into her every vein. “Sasuke-kun!” She moves to crank her window open the rest of the way, and he hops from the neighboring roof down into her office, all nimble legerity that she still thinks has to be a mere mirage conjured from her memories. When he straightens to his full height, she muses that he has to have grown taller. The mere sound of his footsteps on the tile flooring, as familiar a refrain to her as if he’d just walked out of the village yesterday, are a treasure beyond price.

“Sakura.” His voice is a rich timbre that she has desperately felt the absence of; hearing him say her name almost makes her want to cry. She smiles wider instead, to the extent that it almost hurts, and her gaze latches hungrily onto the very eye she was just daydreaming about. A storm of soot and silver, beveled into countless fragments like some kind of dark, rustic diamond, and so staggeringly beautiful that she’s pretty sure she’s blushing just from beholding it. Gods, it's not fair for someone to be so handsome.

“When did you get back?” She asks, utterly overcome with joy. This is better than a letter or any birthday gift she could have received, brighter than any star she’s beheld.

“Just now.” He’s smiling, a small and subtle upturn of lips that is so characteristic of him. Then his words hit her, and her face must be getting redder.

Just now? As in…

“I’m sorry I missed your birthday,” he adds before she can simmer on that for too long, and she has to blink in bewilderment, because that is the absolute last thing she expected him to say. Sakura wonders how much heat can creep into one’s face before they spontaneously combust.

Then she realizes she should probably respond, as humans tend to do in conversations. “Oh! Um… it’s okay.” She folds her hands in front of her shyly, grinning like an idiot. “Thank you for remembering.”

There is a lengthy moment in which she just soaks him in, hoping he can read in her eyes how much she’s missed him. He is still so beautiful, prized eyes and aristocratic angles that have solidified a bit more into the face of a man in the time that’s passed. His hair is different now, covering his Rinnegan eye. His cloak is a little more threadbare, too. He’s tall.

His expression, normally unreadable, is calm. Content, even.

There’s a question nagging at her that she knows she needs to ask. She tries not to bite her lip as she asks it, braces herself for the possibility of not liking the answer.

“Are you… just back for a little while?”

Did you find what you were searching for?

He gazes at her for so long that she thinks he may be glimpsing her soul, peeking into her ventricles to see his own words immortalized there, seared into her core to be felt each time her blood pumps.

“...For more than a while.” And she smiles the biggest she ever has. Oh, this is so much better than a letter or a gift.

“Well, welcome back, Sasuke-kun. It’s… very good to see you again.” It feels as if a piece of her heart has been returned to her, something of the divine stitched back into her chest and full to bursting in omneity.

There is a pause, and then he’s reaching his hand out towards hers, initiating physical contact with a touch that is feather light, so gentle she thinks she is going to start sobbing.

She can’t help it; she pulls him into a hug, tinged with elation. She hopes he doesn’t mind too much; he stiffens for a brief moment, but then settles, wrapping his arm around her and settling his head atop of hers, and she could die happy right there, embracing him with feelings momentarily set free from where they’ve been whelved into her chest.

He smells faintly like sage and smoked cedar, just as she remembered. She can hear his heart thumping, a strong cadence, and it grounds her. Oh, she’s missed him.

“...I’m home, Sakura.” Soft words float above her head, and she can feel the vibration of them through his chest, right by her ear.

Oh, she’s crying.

Sasuke lets her embrace him for a long time, for which she is so grateful. She knows he’s not one for physical contact; it’s a privilege to be allowed into his space even for a single second, let alone for an extended period.

She draws back eventually, glancing up at him again through the tears still collecting in her eyes. Her face blazes when he reaches to wipe them away tenderly with a calloused hand, careful and with a lenity that she’s always known was there, hidden under the surface.

She could just stare at him for hours, she thinks as he lowers his hand. He’s still looking down at her with one of the softest expressions she has ever seen him wear. She really hopes she’s not dreaming.

It’s tremendously hard to get it together, but she tries, because she doesn’t want to spend the entire time crying, not when he's finally back. There are so many questions she’d like to ask him that she’s finding it a challenge to pick one with which to lead.

He surprises her by speaking first, quietly. “I… had something made for you.”

It takes a moment for the words to compute.

Made for me?

Her processing speed must be exceptionally slow, stuck in the utter mush her insides have become, because he adds, “...For your birthday.”

Sakura blinks, and furrows her brows in confusion. “Made… for me?”

He nods. “...I’m sorry it’s late.” The way he speaks it is cryptic, like the apology weighs more than one needed for a tardy gift. Doesn’t he know she doesn’t care? He could have showed up in July with something for her, and it still would have made her knees weak and her heart thump furiously in her chest.

Made for me? She’s still stuck on that sentiment as he breaks eye contact and turns to rummage through his satchel, beneath his cloak.

Sasuke pulls out a medium-sized flat box, a simple white, and she doesn’t know what she expected, but it wasn’t that. Something that comes in a box is a lot more formal than a pressed cherry blossom, something more… permanent.

She reaches out to take it on autopilot, and is stupidly distracted by the way his hand brushes against hers, a small spark that makes something in her quake. She wonders if he felt it, too.

Sakura clutches the box with both hands like her life depends on it, murmuring softly, “Thank you, Sasuke-kun.” She’ll wait until later to open it, after he’s left; whatever it is, she doesn’t want to embarrass him, and she also isn’t sure she can tear her eyes away from him just yet, anyways.

Is it just the lighting in her office, or are his ears a little flushed? She didn’t notice that before; maybe he’s had a drawn-out journey back. She wonders how much ground he covered today, if he’s still winded. He might need to rest.

But then he mumbles, voice husky with what she assumes is disuse, “...You should open it.”

His words echo in her head again. I… had something made for you.

“Okay,” she answers in a hushed voice, so she doesn’t scare him away, shifting slightly to set the box on her desk carefully. Suddenly she is very nervous, anticipation settling into her gut.

When she lifts the lid, she swears her heart ceases beating.

The most exquisitely intricate uchiwa fan she has ever laid eyes upon is placed in the box before her.

It’s carved into a likeness of a cherry blossom tree, branches twisting lissomely into bamboo framework, impossibly fine. A different set of words is reverberating in her head now.

You should try to enjoy your namesake more this year, Forehead. You're so busy that I'm not sure you've realized, but you've really grown into it.

Made for me?

“O-oh.” Sakura is not sure what she expected, but it wasn’t this. She fights back the tears, biting her lip and wide eyes soaking it all in, enjoying her namesake in a way that is entirely unprecedented in its sheer severity. The amount of time it would have taken for someone to sculpt and bind and sew is unimaginable; every detail is finely wrought, flawless down to the silk and stitching, lacquered and carved pale wood shifting effortlessly into eighty slivers of bamboo, intricately webbing silk together with the lithe grace of gossamer. It’s a cherry blossom tree, petals and all, pearlescent thread shifting slightly, gorgeously in the light, unimaginable detail. She has stitched people back together countless times over the course of years, but even her expert dexterity would look like a child’s first embroidery stitching in comparison. The stamen within the petals are nearly more detailed and finely milled than an actual, real life cherry blossom, plexure sutured in a fashion so baronial that it’s impossible to believe human hands were even responsible for it.

The silk. Oh, the silk. The color shift bears a striking resemblance to the Uchiha insignia. This is not a gift one gives to a teammate.

Oh, she's crying.

This has to be a dream, some kind of paracosm her heart thought up to give her brain the high of a lifetime. Hope burgeons and unfolds in her chest cavity, bleeding into her extremities like the pale pink shifting into red before her eyes. She’s never, ever going to forget this, not even if she lives to be one hundred years old.

Made for me?

She picks it up with disbelieving hands, grasping it more carefully than she’s ever held anything in her entire life, as if she’s going to wake up at any moment and it will dissolve into synapse, lost in the hazy juncture of morning the way one tends to lose awareness of the contents of a dream upon coming to lucidity. To her absolute bewilderment, it stays solid in her hands, a finery made even more unbelievable by touch. The grooves of the carving are as gentle as his hand had been on hers earlier. She thinks it would have had to be commissioned at least a few months in advance, outlandishly expensive. She’s never seen silk like this. She doesn't know; she's smart, but she's no artisan. Maybe she should ask Sai. She's crying.

She adores it.

Tears won’t stop welling in her eyes; she thinks they may be escaping from a tender spot inside her chest that’s been reserved for him since she was a child, a leak in a metaphorical dam. She takes a steadying breath, blinks, almost has them conquered. Get a grip, Sakura.

Then Sasuke’s hand is on hers, gently turning the handle over.

Her name is carved into the pale wood, on the back in formal calligraphy, Sakura daintier and more perfect than she could ever write it, as if it had just been uncovered in one of the inner layers rather than whittled there manually. Sasuke presses her fingers to it before loosening his grip, and in that second it feels as though his lost hand is in the wood, caressing her from split atoms in the grooves from the other side.

The tears spill over her cheeks - she admits defeat - intricacy of the entire thing blurring out of focus but still somehow burned into her retinas for all eternity.

Made for me, made for me, made for me-

Her voice finds her after a few more tears fall. “It’s beautiful.” Her voice is barely above a whisper, overwhelmed with complete and utter awe, trying desperately to choke down a sob. “Thank you, Sasuke-kun. I… I’ll treasure it. Always.” She cradles the fan closer to her chest, her heart - maybe An Introduction to Electrocardiography wasn’t a poorly-chosen book, after all; there is much to be read from something this precious - and regards him with watery eyes. She wishes she wasn’t crying; the distortion of the tears is making it hard to see the silver she’s loved and missed so much.

His hand lifts to her face after a moment, and to her surprise, he wipes away her tears again. She barely catches the something-more in his eyes, then, through the waterworks, precious metal flashing and pouring into the words scarred into her ventricles to live there forever, fortified in silver, but he is looking at her so -

“...Always,” he agrees, voice a little breathless, sparking scintilla near hypnotizing her in their luster, and he seems so happy -

Then he leans down to press his lips gently to hers, and this is better than her heart stopping, like when she opened the box. This time, her heart soars, and she touches a star she’s been dreaming of for eons.

[gusu-emilu]

Whumptober 2021 Day 1: “You have to let go”

Fandom: MDZS/CQL Ship: Mo Xuanyu / Nie Huaisang Rating: T, Major Character Death Wordcount: 1166 Tags: Implied/Referenced Suicide, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Angst, Implied Sexual Content, Grief/Mourning, Canonical Character Death

He and Mo Xuanyu have always been meant to part ways in the end.

"You have to let go," Huaisang tells the trembling figure in front of him.

The young man hangs his head, disheveled hair draping over his face. He leans forward as if to bury himself in Huaisang's chest, but not close enough for his face to touch Huaisang’s robes.

A lacquered wooden makeup case rattles in the young man’s hands as his fingers abuse its lid. The makeup case is empty, save for a trace of crimson dust. Several other empty cases litter the ground like bodies cut open after an ambush. They surround the name Mo Xuanyu and a collection of obscene words written in stark red and white on the ground. The sneering voices of Jin cultivators, long since gone, still slither through the air around them, as if crawling out of the crude letters they smeared into the ground.

So this is Jin Guangyao’s newly-discovered brother.

Huaisang feels a sharp pang of sympathy for Mo Xuanyu. To have his passions strewn to the floor, to be looked down upon and mocked, to feel alone in his own sect...

"It's alright," Huaisang says gently, not for the first time. "They're gone now."

But despite his coaxing, Mo Xuanyu still refuses to uncurl his fingers from the case in his hands, still refuses to speak or look him in the eye. Maybe Huaisang should leave.

"How about I give you some of my cosmetics?" he tries.

Mo Xuanyu grips the case harder. "Why...why would you do that?"

Well, that's progress.

Huaisang rests the edge of his fan on the makeup case. Mo Xuanyu flinches and looks up. Rage flashes through his eyes before mellowing to puppy-like sadness and confusion.

Even in this state of disarray, the white powder on his face wet, red streaks smearing down over his cheekbones, Mo Xuanyu is beautiful.

But Huaisang doesn't miss the startling forcefulness of that flash of anger, steely and concentrated like the tension of a wrought bow. He wouldn't have expected such rage from someone who seems to want to make himself as small as possible.

Mo Xuanyu is miserable.

Luckily for both of them, misery loves company.

"Consider it a gift of initiation," Huaisang finally answers.

"Initiation of...what?"

Huaisang slips a jade powder case from his sleeve and holds it out. Opening his fan with a spirited snap, he smiles and cocks an eyebrow. "Initiation of our friendship, of course."

Mo Xuanyu stares wide-eyed at the powder case and its intricate design of swirling patterns and twin magpies. He blinks, and the faintest smile appears on his lips.

He reaches for the case.

* * *

"A-Yu!" Huaisang says through laughter. "You have to let go!"

Giggling, Mo Xuanyu hugs the bundle of Huaisang's robes against his bare body and dodges out of Huaisang's reach. His grin becomes sharper when he's mischievous like this, his movements more resolute than his usual delicacy. He is something totally other when he is smiling and cheerful, transforming like a tattered sheet of paper folded into the shape of a crane.

Huaisang can't hold back his grin. "Give me my robes back!"

"Not unless we stay here a little longer."

"You do realize that it must be for something important if it's me, of all people, who wants to get out of bed."

"It's that important?" Mo Xuanyu asks, caught off guard.

Huaisang shrugs. "Maybe not. I don't know." He relents and lies back down, letting Mo Xuanyu happily join him once more.

Breathes in the giddiness that masks the truth of their relationship, lets the comfort drown out his thoughts.

Huaisang knows their joyful moments together are fleeting. Mo Xuanyu will return to his place of scorn in Jinlintai and resume his secret studies of demonic cultivation. Huaisang will return to Qinghe and do his best to keep Da-ge’s mind from splitting along the lines that Baxia has carved into him.

Even without their separateness of their lives, Huaisang’s relationship with Mo Xuanyu will never be appropriate to make public. And, Huaisang tells himself, it is not that significant of a relationship anyway. Just a fling. Just some fun.

He tries not to let himself feel too much, tries not to become too attached. He knows it’s selfish to toy with someone whose life is so precarious, someone so fundamentally alone.

But he and Mo Xuanyu have always been meant to part ways in the end.

* * *

"You have to let it go," Jin Guangyao says, hand on Huaisang's shoulder.

Huaisang wants to cut off that hand. Cut off the fingers that plucked deceit on guqin strings. Cut off his whole arm.

For that, Huaisang would pick up a saber. Would touch one of those cursed blades that poisoned Da-ge.

But he won't.

Not like that.

Huaisang clenches his teeth and swallows the bile, lets Jin Guangyao's palm sink into his shoulder, smiles and nods and plays nice and plays dumb for "San-ge."

For now, he lets it go.

* * *

Huaisang is in bed with Mo Xuanyu, drowning out his grief, when he has the idea to let his lover go.

His mind makes the connections in a flash as his heart sinks, the last piece of his plan fitting into place like a missing bone from a skeleton, like the final word of a curse.

Mo Xuanyu’s kiss seems to burn his lips that night.

Huaisang would call himself a selfish man, but he and Mo Xuanyu have always been meant to part ways in the end.

* * *

You have to let go, he tells himself when he finds Mo Xuanyu slumped over in a shack, clothes in tatters, blood weeping from his wrists.

This time, Mo Xuanyu hangs his head, but not against Huaisang's chest. This time, hideous crimson writing is scrawled on the ground around him, written not in Mo Xuanyu's cosmetic powder, but in his own blood, by his own hand.

This time, Mo Xuanyu offered the gift.

Why did you do it? Huaisang wants to ask, but knows the answer like it's written into his skin with the blood of the soul he helped kill.

* * *

As Huaisang sits alone in his room, he holds Mo Xuanyu’s jade powder case—the same powder case he had gifted to him when they first met—and thinks.

Mo Xuanyu had been consumed by revenge. Had let it take his body like a fire devours through a forest, stripping it dry, leaving only black, brittle remains of what had once been.

Had burned out in a flash and left the ashes for Huaisang to hold onto.

Huaisang can easily take things for granted, can easily throw away a vessel for happiness—he had always been selfish and only grown more callous each time something had slipped through his fingers and left cuts behind—

But they are invisible cuts, of course.

It is with smooth, unblemished skin that Huaisang caresses the carvings of Mo Xuanyu's powder case. Cradles the relic with clean hands.

Yet those hands are shaking.

Shaking, they refuse to let go...

[katerix]

Hey @pinyapple​! I’m your Secret Cupid! Here I am jumping from the horse into the last wagon of the event train:D I hope that the story is interesting, and you��ll enjoy it! @rdr-secret-cupid​ 

Pairing: John Marston\f!Reader Warnings: fluff\angst&comfort\a hint of smut - 3in1: a little bit of this and that Words: 3434 (picture is not mine \ credits to the author)

“Morning, my dear girl,” said your father when you approached a big wooden table in the middle of the kitchen. “Good morning, dad,” you smiled, sleepily rubbing your eye.

It was a Saturday morning and today you woke up exceptionally late, about 1pm.

You were living on a small farm with your father. It was located a few miles away from the nearest town and it would’ve taken a half an hour to ride there.

You loved to take an old Travis the horse from the stable and ran away where the sun was waking up early. You liked to dream about travelling, adventures and far lands in the shadow of a big tree not very far from your house.

“I’ve been in town this morning,” said your father. “Did you? You never told me that you were going to. How was the ride? Everything was fine?” “Yes, sure. I saw Mrs. Anderson. She sent her regards.” “Oh, I appreciate that, thank you,” you smiled at him.

Mrs. Anderson was a nice woman who had a small flower shop and always gave you some flowers when you attended the town.

“I will drop in during the next visit,” you said while making yourself tea and sliced some more bread. “That’s what I’d like to hear!”, he replied.

Mr. (y\second name) was conservative when it came to the questions of manners. You were always expected to be a polite girl from a good family and you definitely were. But the young blood always desires venture. May it be caused by the stars location or chaotic decision of capricious gods, but something led you to the meeting with a man called John Marston on that fateful evening.

You opened the newspaper which was on the corner of the table and looked through some articles before you turned to your father.

“Dad? I wanted to go for a walk tonight. I heard that this evening will be special and the starfall must be observable from our part of the world!” “What do you say!” “Yes! I heard it from Mr. Douglas a week ago.” “You want to go out alone at night? You are a grown up lady and it’s not my privilege to tell you what to do, but don’t you think it’s a dangerous idea? There’re criminal elements in this area, you know that." “Oh don’t worry papa, I won’t be alone. I arranged to get together with our former sheriff’s elder son. He likes astronomy, do you remember that?” “Sure I do,” - he kept silent for some moment then said, - “Well. I think I can agree on that.”

Sheriff’s elder son was a man in his early forties and was married to a town girl and had already earned himself time to do astronomy, so there was nothing to worry about. Of course, getting such an alibi was a bold action, because if your father decides to ask about observing the stars, just from the point of good manners, the truth will be brought to the light. Your actual plan was to meet with John today. You also wanted to discuss a family dinner. The truth was that none of them knew about it - that’s why you were feeling a little nervous about the upcoming meeting. You wanted to introduce John to your father, but he always wanted you to unite for life with a noble young man from a prospective family, occupied in, let’s say, sales. Somehow you and John could hide your relationship for more than a year. His lifestyle, his bonds with the gang were making you question the possibility of your fine peaceful life together one day. And the fact that Mr. Marston never protested against these dreams of yours, was inspiring a warm feeling in your heart. 

“So when do you want to leave?” “Around half past nine, it must be almost dark.” “You sure you don’t want me to escort you there?” “No-no, there’s no need for such sacrifice,” you giggled. Your dad gave you a delicate smile and sipped from his cup.

*** There was nowhere to rush now, when the father approved your little prairie voyage, so the rest of the day you spent in the garden behind the house. The territory of the ranch was quite big but the main part of your property rendered suitable land for agriculture. A small piece of it was gifted to you in order to plant flowers there. A lot of seeds were bought from Mrs. Anderson's, and sometimes you even brought her some of your own for sale. Roses of any kind and size, some tiger lilies and peonies- that all made your flower garden look great.

The closer to the time, the more excited you were. You dressed in a shirt and trousers with boots, with a thin fur jacket - for the night ride it was the best option - and took a creamy pink rose to put it in your hair once you are beyond the fence. You went down to find your father and say him goodbye.

“Dad, you here? I’m leaving!”

You looked into the living room, expecting to see him there with a book or at the table, writing another business letter, but it was empty. Then she heard a noise from the second floor and saw your father on the staircase.

“Already going?” “Yes, it’s high time. I’ll do my best to come back before dawn!” “What are you doing to your old man, young lady!” he laughed, making his way down the stairs to give his daughter an embrace. “Don’t worry, I will be fine, I promise. Please, you should think about your heart, papa,” you smiled widely, hugging him in an answer. “Be careful, my dear.” “I will,” you waved with your hand.

*** You almost approached the meeting point, when you felt your horse getting worrisome and saw the skies turning dark quickly. Rains in this area were starting as fast as they finished and you could only wonder “why now?”. Deep dark heavens didn’t condescend to the answer, so you just rubbed your legs in disappointment and continued riding to find a hideout before the first raindrops. You purposely avoided the Thieves Landing, so there were not many placed to hide from the rain on her way. During your and John's last meeting some days ago you decided to meet in the woods in West Elizabeth where there was a perfect spot upon the cliffs to watch the grand river from a distance, where not a single soul could disturb them.

Suddenly she heard a horse neighing then she saw a rider coming from behind the hill. At first you were dismayed as you didn’t have any weapon, but a moment later you recognized a familiar figure.

“Hey, sweetheart, isn’t it dangerous for such a pretty lady to ride alone at night?” then a low laughter followed.

When John’s horse got closer, you couldn’t help but resent:

“You scared the hell out of me! I thought it was a gangster who tracked me down.” “Well, actually I am a gangster, you see!”

As he hoped, your frustration was softened by his silly joke. It always gave him a warm feeling, because his sense of humor left a lot to be desired, but you always found it funny.

His horse drew level with yours, and he leaned down to kiss you, grinning when he saw how modestly you hid your smile.

“Oh no, y\n, do not hide this beautiful smile from me!”

You raised your head and looked at the man. His hand reached out to you and gently touched your chin, leaving a deep kiss on your lips.

“How was the road? Got without troubles?” asked John, picturing the way from the ranch to this point in his head. “As long as troubles don’t follow me - it’s fine by me. Why?” “It’s nothing really. On the way here I saw some gentlemen, heading west.”

John looked up in the sky and his eyebrows got together as he noticed how lightly you were dressed and how the sudden gust made your hair fly. “I know an old abandoned household not far from here. If we move right now, we can reach it before the storm.”

“I feel that something worries you.” “No-no, that’s totally fine,” he replied, taking a last look in the direction you came from.

After a while you finally reached the mansion that John was talking about. In real life it turned out to be bigger and more of a manor than “an old abandoned house”. Suddenly the skies split up in two by bright lightning, then a remote thunder hit your ears. You shuddered. What got into you? You were never afraid of thunder or darkness but this time something was scratching your heart with little iron claws.

You didn't notice that John had already dismounted, came over to you and put his hand on your leg, gently running it up and down.

“We going? Or you prefer to stay under the rain?” “Ah? Yeah,” with these words you tried to get down from the horse, only to end up in his arms, as he readily caught you up. You felt your heart beat faster against his chest, so you even wondered if he felt it or not, when you saw a dorky smile on his face.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered. That, obviously, was not the most non-banal compliment, but he couldn’t help but admire your features and the flower in your hair, which so perfectly accentuated the color of your eyes. John didn’t let you stand on the ground and carried you all the way to the mansion.

When you entered the building, you stood on the floor and looked around. Tall walls were covered in old, almost destroyed by dampness, dull red wallpapers. You walked around the room and stopped next to the beautiful, probably, handmade sofa. John walked up to you and cuddled you from behind. His hand traced along your stomach and slid to your leg. You felt his warm breath on your neck. You turned around and kissed his jawline, moved up to the lips. He answered with a deep, passionate kiss. Then, with a sharp movement, he lifted you up and put you down, pinning down onto the couch.

*** “John?” “Yeah?” his voice sounded low and lazy. “I need to tell you something.” “I’m all ears, sweetheart.” “Do… Do you love me?” you felt how your cheeks were becoming hot. You also realized how silly this may sound, but you couldn’t take your words back.

John looked down at you lying on top of him and thoughtfully twirled a lock of your hair around his finger.

“Of course, princess. Why’d you ask?”

You were not sure how to reply so you didn’t rush to look in his eyes.

“You remember my father? Mr. y\sn.” “I’ve seen him in the town once. But never after that. Is that about him? Did anything happen?” “No, everything is fine. I just wanted to ask if… Would you come for a family dinner tomorrow? I’d introduce you to my father…»

He kept silent for a while. So you started to feel nervous and asked yourself why you even initiated that conversation. But then he answered:

“I’m not in my best shape to show up in higher society, you know..”

Again you looked up at him. Then smiled and gently touched his cheek, fingertips slowly stroking his fresh scars.

“I absolutely love your current shape, John.”

You felt him pressing you against his chest closer, rubbing a little invisible patterns on your bare back.

“It would be a great pleasure to come, but… You sure your father would enjoy my company? Because I’m not sure at all.”

Now it was your turn to make a pause.

He chuckled:

“Let it be.” “So will you come tomorrow?” “I’ll be there. I promise.”

The second you heard that, you felt like a huge rock got down from your shoulders, finally letting you breath.

You spent some more hours together in each other's embrace.

*** You were sitting on the doorsteps when you heard a noise from behind the barn. You didn’t expect John to come so soon and also why he didn't choose an open road to the ranch. After a long talk your father agreed to have dinner all together, so there was no need to sneak. The next moment you saw two riders, coming around the corner, your eyes got wider. Suddenly you heard the sound of a cocked gun to your left and shuddered.

“Hello, ma’am. Mind if I come in?”

You looked at the source of the sound and saw a middle aged man with shirt red hair and a whisker. You never saw him before, but you had no doubt that he was some gang leader. His hazel eyes were looking cold at you and it seemed obvious that an argument was not an option - a weapon pointed at you was a thing to be scared of.

“Move,” he ordered.

Two riders who were supposed to divert attention got closer, and you recognised two customers from the shop a week ago. Their leader with a rifle repeated in low tone:

“Go.”

You followed the order without saying a word. Men entered the house after you.

“Tie her up. I don’t like her sight, and I don’t want any surprise.”

Three more men entered the house and God knows how many of them left outside. One of the newcomers took off a rope and tied your hands up - you felt a slight pain caused by rough material.

“Good. And now, Mr.(y\sn),” he turned to your dad, “let’s talk.” The ginger man made an inviting gesture. You looked at your father and saw fear in his eyes, but he was acting totally cool and calm. Two men, standing next to the door, were holding rifles at the ready. Your dad nodded and went to the kitchen, followed by the ginger man.

You stayed alone in the living room, other gangsters were standing outside. You didn’t hear the conversation and had no idea about the reason for this attack, so you focused on the rope. An attempt to get rid of it has proven unfruitful, so you looked around to find any tool.

When you were about to stand up and search the desk drawers, a loud shot rang out behind the window. You saw three gangsters running out from the kitchen, swearing and shouting curses. You carefully approached the window and looked out. A splash of bright red blood covered the window glass and you staggered back, breathing heavy and fast. You heard a familiar voice from the distance:

“Don’t hide, cowards! Are you afraid of just one man?” taunting his enemies was so much like John.

You already started to worry - what if he would have changed his mind and would never showed up? You were happy that he appeared, and did it right in time. The sounds of battle continued unabated, and you thought that now was the best chance to get to the kitchen. The moment you were already next to the door your sight faced a dark shadow suddenly appeared in the doorway. You looked up and with a horror recognised the ginger man. You wanted to step away, but he grabbed you faster than you could blink.

“Let me go!” you tried to escape this tight grip but he was stronger.

You saw your father making an attempt to hit the bastard, but he didn’t seem to even notice that. He turned around and knocked Mr.(y\sn) down on the floor with his revolver.

“You son of a bitch! You will regret this!” you shouted at him. That was not a wise thing to do, but seeing him hurting your relative made you mad in a second.

“Language, lady,” the gangster chuckled, making an effort to hold you still, as you were kicking furiously, “Relax. I won’t hurt you,” his left, spare of a gun palm touched your cheek.

You were breathing heavily. “Where are you, John» you thought. Another one shot rang out louder , and you heard a voice screaming curses. For seconds you couldn’t hear anything from the outside. All outlaws were probably dead or wounded. But three gangsters were still inside the house - one behind the door corner, two others were next to the windows.

“C’mon, be a good girl,” said the gang leader and pulled you after him. Together you returned into the living room and the man stood behind a small purpur sofa, facing the doorway - the revolver at the ready. You couldn’t see your father was sitting beneath the wall, holding his hand on the forehead, a thin blood line was going down the temple.

The sound of shooting was getting closer, you heard how two or three bullets hit the wall. If earlier the gang leader was a picture of self-confidence, now this confidence of his started fading away. You kept quiet just continuing to fidget slightly.

The minutes seemed endless but the voice ripped you out of your thoughts:

“Hey mister, let the girl go. You don’t want problems, believe me!” “What about you taking your cowboy ass out of here, now?” “I’ll let you live if you free her.” “Put your weapon on the floor so I can see it and step inside. Or I'm gonna shoot this pretty face.”

John hesitated but then followed the order and put the rifle on the floor, slowly pushing it inside.

“I’m coming in. Don’t shoot.”

You felt how the ginger man swallowed loudly. He was nervous. You saw John entering. His right hand was close to body, another one slightly aside, demonstrating that he was disarmed. The gangster revolver was following the cowboy as he was approaching. He said something else, but you already stopped listening. You didn't have time to think that it could be dangerous but suddenly you kicked him hard on the leg with the heel.

Then everything happened too fast. You didn’t notice how John took out a gun with his right hand and shot right between the gangster’s eyes. 

“John!”

He rushed toward you, held your tied hands and hurried to untie them with his hands shaking.

“Shh-shh, you are safe, y\n, you are safe now, everything is fine,” he whispered.

Once you were free, he pressed you against him tightly, burying his face in your hair. You crossed your hands behind his back.

“You came!” “How could I not come?” he looked down at you, cupping your cheeks, and kissed you gently. 

You hardly kept a smile back. You two remained this way for a couple of minutes until your breath became calm and quiet. You were too overwhelmed with emotions that you didn’t even see a bloody wound on his shoulder.

“Oh no, your arm! You are hurt!”

“It’s just a scratch, baby,” he smiled at you, clumsily hiding a pleasure of you being so lovely and cute, and worrying that much about him. “Let’s help your dad,” said John and kissed your hand.

He stepped aside holding your hand in his and headed to the corridor. Your father was already back on foot and, when he turned to you, you saw an expression of relief on his face.

“Oh, you are safe, my dear girl, thank God!” you ran towards the oldman and hugged him.

John was standing a couple of steps aside with his head slightly bent down and a faint smile on his lips, leaning on one leg, left hand on his side. Only now you noticed that he was dressed not casually, but as festive as possible.

Mr.(y\sn) looked at John and you saw respect in his eyes. He approached the cowboy and held out his hand in order to shake in gratitude.

“To my knowledge, our hero must be John Marston,” he gave a fast glance in your direction, “you saved our lives, young man. I can never thank you enough for that.”

John shaked your father’s hand with a friendly smirk.

“Don’t worry, Mr.(y\sn). That was my duty to protect unarmed people from this bunch of bastards.”

“Well, don’t you mind going to the kitchen? Everything was prepared an eternity ago. Do you like whiskey, Mr. Marston?”

You came a little closer to them to be a part of a talk too.

“Sure, sir.”

Your father went away, and John softly touched your waist to let you go first.

[windsweptlassie]

On Love

So as you know I made this uquiz with an open-ended question at the end, tell me something about love, and I’ve gotten the most wonderful responses! They range from descriptions of wonderful partners: 

Lauren: oh, how long I went without being myself until I met him and he showed me who I truly was and that my worth was higher than I ever thought was possible

Levi: I love who we are with each other. I love who I am with you. In your company I am me. In your company I am the best of me. The best with the best, I've told you. I wouldn't give you up for anything

Daniel: i fell in love for the first time when i was 17... at the time, i didn’t realize it was the first time, i thought i’d been in love before, a couple times actually, but falling in love at 17 was such a fulfilling experience, it felt so forceful yet so right. it’s when i first truly understood what love was. never before had i felt so understood and so cared for as i did when i was in love with her, and she was in love with me. it’s been nearly 4 years since then, and nearly 3 years since we broke up and stopped talking, and still, i think about her almost every day. i’ve never known anyone like her; to me, she was love itself.

El: oh i’m in love with everyone that i know op!!! especially my girlfriend, of course ,but also my friends and my family and random people on the street and uh

Grace: i’ve met my soulmate and we plan on getting an apartment and marrying after college

A: I’m going to ask the woman I love to marry me and I just wanted to tell someone because I am so excited

Jeremy: you ever have that feeling where basically after years of denying that someone couldnt understand you in a way or love you and then the next thing you know you happen to find that person and its just great from then on out? idk how to explain it anyways I love my boyfriend so much he means the world to me

Lucy: i am so happy i have found the one i love

to descriptions of best friends and favorite people:

Nightbyrd: Love is a hug from an alzheimer's patient who hasn't the foggiest idea who you are, but they know you're worth hugging.

H: I have been doing so much yoga with my roommate recently!! It's a great way to center my mind for an hour

Riv: [platonic] i’ve literally never met anyone who understands me in the way that my best friends do. they’re literally the best people in the whole world and i genuinely don’t know what i’d do without them. i love them with my whole heart

Cillian: when i talk about how much i love my best friend i get so teary eyed because i cant believe that such a genuinely wonderful person wants to speak to me every day - i care for her more than anyone else on this planet

O: my two besties are my sources of happiness and they’re so pretty i would die for them :D

to beautiful quotes:

Kai: "you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on." DARCYYYY PLS MY HEART CANT HANDLW THIS PAIN

Dorian: When the plane went down in San Francisco, I thought of my friend M. He’s obsessed with plane crashes. He memorizes the wrecked metal details, ____the clear cool skies cut by black scars of smoke. Once, while driving, he told me about all the crashes: The one in blue Kentucky, in yellow Iowa. How people go on, and how people don’t. It was almost a year before I learned that his brother was a pilot. I can’t help it, I love the way men love. (accident report in the tall, tall weeds- ada limon, bright dead things)

Adam: every day I think about lemony snicket I will love you if I never see you again I will love you if I see you every Tuesday or however it goes. and it KILLS ME. love only fits in small things

Hero: “Your heart beats in my ribs and mine in yours, and both in God’s… The divine magnet is in you, and my magnet responds.” - Herman Melville to Nathaniel Hawthorne

Mary: "Love is watching someone die."

Alex: "meet me at blue diner, i'll take coffee and talk about nothing baby"

Sparrow: "How dare you love me like you've never known fear?" and "For you, the world," and "Darling, I was born to press my head between your shoulder blades," and "Will you start where I end?"

V: " You want to die for love. You always have. " and "someone will remember us, I say, even in another time" are living rent free in my mind 24/7 and I'm shaking. When will I finally be not the only one falling ?

Sahar K: To love another person is to see the face of god!!!

Miriam: all the love in the world is useless when there is total lack of understanding- kafka

Juls: Don’t you think they are maybe the same? Love and attention

to practices of love:

Leo; i love feeling happy bc somebody that i love is happy and comfortable....like its not about me i just love seeing you smile. we are safe together...idk i just feel it bro

A: I like to think love is leaning on each other during the light or dark days. Its a personal mission of mine to find out who I am and what I want. Yet I never seem to find my place in this world and as I look and look , I realise the only place I can be myself even with or without the efforts to find myself was done on that day or not, I am always tired so shall I lean on you? And you can lean on me as well. I shall be your fig tree and you shall be my favourite willow tree.

L: It's too late at night to be soul searching, but it's a journey we all seem to find ourselves on these days.

Anthi: feeling safe and at home, I guess (also I love frogs)

Julia: ive found that loving someone is like becoming your own thesaurus. you have to find or come up with infinite ways to say, you’re beautiful, or, i love you. it’s a gift

Galexies: ive been writing letters to the person i'd love one day since i was 14. i write them in a little journal usually, but i've been digitizing them into emails and sending them to one account that i'll give to them someday. i'd like to put pictures, but i haven't been outside much recently so theres that. i wonder if they'd like the sunsets i have on file, or if they'd find my cat cute in a bowtie.

Caeles: Love is sharing fruit slices and making someone tea at random

Dundy: Love is sending your friends cursed shit and watching them react in horror

to crushes and potential loves: 

Jess: I have a crush on my roommate. It sucks, but it's also wonderful. I get to be around him all the time when we're at school. we share a life together; it's rather domestic. I think a lot about marrying him and being domestic with him forever. It won't happen, and I'll move on eventually, but I'll be happy with him for as long as I can. I hope you feel loved tonight, because you are. Sleep well.

Aki: I so desperately want to believe that love is fake because I’ve seen what happens when loved ones leave but whenever I start to convince myself that I’ll never love anyone my best friend messages me telling me she loves me. She’s the only person I’ve ever pictured having a future with but love scares me and I don’t really know what to do but I think as long as she’s with me in some way, I’ll be fine

Hi: her her i keep thinking abt her.... gonna see her in 8 days or so i really miss her. its ok if shes never gonna love me like i want her to really being her friend spending time with her makes me the happiest girl on earth.... outsold antidepressants

Kit: this guy i have a crush on has hypnotically dark brown eyes and he's wonderful and shows me kindness like no one else

Juno: my crush has all the stars in his eyes

Mads: When I have the courage to meet my eyes with hers, the world stands still

Be Nice To Me: Look bro I never do these but I am yearning to hold them SO badly right now and someone needs to know it besides me

to the trials of love: 

Pppppp: I just wanna love like from the movies and what I read about.. but everyone tells me that that’s fictional and rare to find in the real world and it sucks bc it seems like all the guys I’ve met are terrible and the norms of society are all about not respecting women and uthdjdjdk

Manny: I have been in love before and I will be again but I’m not now and I miss it

Ok: I don't think I've ever been in love, though I love many people. I am waiting for the day I look at someone and can say, YES. IT'S YOU.

Chloe: idk rn i'm like okay with my love and i'm happy so we'll see i'm just a little cautious rn bc my last partner told me i didn't know how to love

L: love is so fucking complicated I don't even know where to start

Corrin: He’s not real and it worried me that I will never allow myself to live or be loved because I will always be waiting for him

Sean: Good luck it dont exist

Serena: i want 2 b in love :(( </3

13: I don’t know anymore

M: I just really don’t like dealing with it lol

to beloved characters: 

Janaya: I’m madly in love with my comfort and kin character and I hope maybe in the afterlife I can relive a life with him in some sort of dimension

Jhgjdf: when i was a kid i had a crush on ash ketchum from pokemon and id always daydream about being a female pkmn trainer and meeting him and we fall in love

to advice and prose: 

Mikolai: Love is earth, gentle and soft at first flight but upon being broken, drowns you in the dry choking wastes of its consequences...

Thex: Your hands will not go cold without someone to hold them. I am here. I will be here.

Kat: it is the nearest proof to god that i find myself surrounded by people who love in a way that complements so wonderfully the way i love

H: believe in love out of spite believe in love to prove everyone wrong believe in love because you were told not to and we will not do what we’re told anymore believe in love because it’s the strongest act of teenage rebellion we have left believe in love because it’s easier not to and when is easy worth doing? believe in love because everything says otherwise but you are untouchable, you are your own, you are not made by their design believe in love because, perhaps, you are love

Ali: I used to want a kind of love that feels like coming home and now I want nothing more than to be away from home on many different adventures

Em: you dont need to love yourself to accept it from others

to the small, the simple, and the sweet:

Ireal: Poems

O: Flowers

Fay: ah im sorry that i’m feeling unmotivated but you are very kind.

Ad: we love LOVE

A: <3

Isak: small things

H: intense

Hey: Listening to a clock ticking away

S: her

E: <3

Hania: Amorous, I adore that word ^^

Catboy: wholesome

J: i love love so much it hurts

Emmy: hi i love the song darkest of discos!! try and give it a listen!! <3

Nora: Love is painful, but most of the time love is great

Ariel: i like the comfort it can bring

M: i love love

to food!

Cool Whip: Matzoh ball soup!!

Woop: I love sausages.... I hope that's ok with you?

and animals too <3

Nee: hmm i have pet geckos and i love them very much!

96: raccoons ????

DJ Big Penis: cats

:3: I Love frogs,,, love is stored in the frog,,,

I hope that this serves as a sweet compilation of what love means! Love to all of you, it warms my heart so much to hear about your people and your geckos and your characters and soup and all the songs and quotes you love. <3 Strength to all of you who are figuring out to do about your feelings for your crush, and congratulations to you who are proposing or moving in with your person! Your words are a source of light to me, truly.

[anonymousbaev]

Can I please request the RFA with an mc that have small boobs and is insecure about it?

RFA reaction to insecure Mc with small boobs

*Profanity and slight NSFW warning* Thank you for the request, as always slight NSFW ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Enjoy! (´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡

☆ Yoosung ☆

You always wore baggy clothes so it wouldn't be the first thing to notice that you had small bosoms.

Nobody in their right mind would even look there but you were sensitive about it, so it always felt like people were staring at you and judging you for your small boobs.

One day Yoosung and you accidently fell asleep on the bed together nothing happened it was a quick nap you and Yoosung still have your virginity, ok?

You woke up earlier than Yoosung did and tried to squirm out of bed when Yoosung tried to hug you back with his arm that accidently landed exactly on your breasts.

You screeched pushing him off of you as he rolled down the bed, “Yoosung!!! Are you okay?” You rushed to his aid feeling nothing but guilt.

He rubbed his head, tears slightly pricked in his eyes as he nodded and apologized, “Sorry I didn’t mean to touch you there- I deserved this.”

You kneeled next to him as you clutched your hands, “Are you disappointed..?”

He was so confused, “Huh? About what?”

You covered your mouth, avoiding his gaze as you mumbled out, “That I have small boobs-”

“Wh- what...” You both turn into a blushing mess. But he quickly composes himself before you get the wrong idea. “Not at all, the way you look doesn’t matter to me-” and then he blurts out, “Don’t get the wrong idea though because I think you’re incredibly hot, I meant gorgeous. A...anyways it’s the heart that matters. And you’re the most caring person I’ve ever met. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to meet another person like you. So of course nothing like that matters to me.”

  ☕️ Jaehee ☕️ 

Baehee is the complete opposite of you, she’s been rather fortunate in her upper area. And you were so jealous of her for that.

Especially when you both went outside together, it always felt like people were comparing the two of you.

You always held your arm in attempt to hide your flat chests.

Of course Jaehee had noticed the weird behaviors of her dear girlfriend.

She brought it up to you one day out of the blue when you were both getting ready to open the café. 

“What makes you think that?”

“The way you always wear baggy clothes, cover your chest with your arm, and when you asked Saeyoung for his hoodie at the RFA party." You nod, surprised how she was able to put two and two together when she was usually clueless on stuff like this.

Your face burned up embarrassed to look at her in the eye.

"Mc, I heard people always want what they can't have. But if you actually get to have it you'll realize how it was nothing like you'd imagined it to be. Stuff only looks good when you can't have it, we can only come to appreciate ourselves. But I know that can be hard. I guess that's why we both admire each other's boobs. Cause I'd totally rather have yours."

 ♬ Zen ♬

You were gonna attend a awarding ceremony for the years notable actors as Zen’s date.

The dress you had to wear showed a lot of skin, especially in the upper area but you tried to tell yourself you could do it.

That was until you got there and you anxiously bit your nails. Zen noticed you and pulled you to the side.

“Jagi what’s wrong? It’s okay, I’m here. Talk to me, it’s going to be okay.” He gently pulled your hand away from your mouth, afraid you might hurt yourself as he hugged you.

“Zen... I can’t do it. This dress, it’s too much for me.” You glanced down at your breasts and blushed as you muttered out, “I don’t even have anything here and it’s so noticeable I’m flat as hell. I’m so sorry, but I can’t.” You clutched your hands together over your chest.

He smiles as he reassures you, “Baby, it’s totally fine if you think you can’t do it. Since you’re so much more important to me than anything. But just know they don’t make you any less attractive. They’re one of my favorite things about you after all, especially in bed~”

♛ Jumin ♛ 

Jumin had asked you out for a dinner date the other night, to which you gladly agreed to.

The next morning you found an extremely revealing dress on the bed next to a letter, “See you tonight, my love.”

Your heart fluttered at his romantic letter and gift but you felt nervous as you anxiously examined the dress.

You just couldn’t bring yourself to wear the dress that night, instead you wore a plain but formal coat dress. 

It was completely different from what Jumin had bought you, the dress he wanted to see you in and you knew that.

When you were dropped off at a fancy restaurant, a waiter led you to Jumin.

The first thing he noticed was your dress, different from what he had bought for you. You took a seat.

“Darling, did something happen to the dress I got you? I was hoping you’d wear it tonight.”

You nervously fiddled with your sleeves before looking up to his black eyes, “Sorry, are you mad?

He shook his head as he took a sip of his wine, “Just confused.”

“Well... I don’t necessarily like wearing revealing clothes because I don’t have a lot going on here...” You looked down at your chest hoping he would get the hint, to which he did.

“And why is that a problem, darling?”

“Bigger breasts are more attractive, there’s no need to reveal so much stuff up here, if there’s nothing.”

“My love, you have plenty going on. You do not have to feel so insecure, you look lovely.”

👓 Saeyoung 👓 

You jokingly stole Saeyoung’s iconic hoodie and teased him, “Come get it if you can!”

So the chase around the huge house began making a mess everywhere, much to Vander and Saeran’s disapproval.

That’s when you both began feeling tired and Saeyoung wasn’t playing anymore because he pulled you right into a back hug.

His arms were tightly wrapped under your breasts, to which he could probably feel. Your heart started to beat rapidly, not sure if it was because of all the running or the anxious feeling right now. Probably the later.

You told him to get off to which he immediately did, hearing the seriousness in your voice. “Sorry was I hurting you?”

“No... my boobs are small right..?” You soon confessed to as he laughed.

You glared at him giving him the ‘your dead if you continue laughing’ look.

 “Sorry. I didn’t mean to laugh, but you’re so adorable. What’s wrong with small boobs? They're as attractive as big ones are.”

“What? So you’re still not denying that big boobs are attractive though!”

“Hmm... did I?”  He lets out a cocky grin before getting lowkey serious again, “I’m saying it doesn’t matter, I love your body because it’s yours~”

Saeran and Vanderwood in the other room: “Are they seriously talking about boobs right now after they just trashed the entire house????”

♧ Jihyun ♧ 

Jihyun wanted to snap a picture of you when you sweetly smiled at the flowers, you looked like an angel to him.

When you heard the camera, your heart dropped, because first, you didn’t even notice him there, and second you were wearing a flowy floret dress that exposed a decent amount of your chest.

You have both slept countless nights together before, but him taking a picture of you in this kind of dress, that obviously showed that you had not much going on in your chest area. 

It made you feel so insecure.

He noticed your uncomfortable look right away and apologized, “Sorry, my love. I should’ve asked you beforehand. I can delete it if you want.”

You shook your head and confessed with a sulk, “I have small boobs, they look unattractive.”

He stared at you dead ass into your soul.

“They do not look unattractive, love. Every part of you is beautiful and wonderful, because they’re all a piece of you.”

Ok but why does V in his kind of sound like a psychopath I’m sorry. This took me a while to do but I hope it’s to your liking dear requester!  

 ｡･ﾟ(ﾟ><ﾟ)ﾟ･｡

[ivushk]

HELLO. MAY I PLEASE HEAR MORE OF YOUR VAMPIRE AU…. 👉👈

OH MY GOD I'M SO GLAD YOU ASKED THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

Okay, SO. BUCKLE THE FUCKLE UP 'CUZ here's what I've got so far:

Nishiki and Kiryu are still orphans at Sunflower. They come from a tiny village just a few kilometres west from the orphanage. It's a very close and closed-off community. The boys' parents died in a fire when they were very little (which is a common theme for the kids at Sunflower and isn't that a crazy coincidence? *smiles mysteriously*), however the Nishikiyama family house wasn't as badly damaged as Kiryu's so it's just sitting there, waiting for its former residents to reclaim ownership as soon as they're able to (I imagine Kazama would help them with that).

In the next years it becomes a home for Nishiki, Yuko and Kiryu (and Yumi, too, though she feels like a visitor for the most part) in everything but name. It's their hangout spot, their "base of operations", their not-so-secret meeting place. When Yuko's health deteriorates so much that she can't stay at Sunflower anymore, the siblings actually properly move in to make arranging the doctor's visits easier.

It's Nishiki's 17th birthday and all three of them are celebrating and playing games and eating cake and having a good time at the edge of the woods not far from the Nishikiyama residence. They're young and loud and stupid (and ignoring the fact that several people went missing over the course of the last few months) and if Nishiki's heart beats a little too hard in his chest when Kiryu gives him his gift - a beautiful, heavy silver pendant on a slightly-worn leather cord - he doesn't think about it too much (and if he notices that Kiryu stares at him just a bit longer than usual without saying a single word but his gaze is so, so, SO fond-- he doesn't think about it either). (he leaves these kinds of thoughts for restless nights because thinking about his best friend in that way during the day... it hurts. the hurt is good sometimes but it's overwhelming).

They're drunk on the cheap beer they've smuggled from Gen-san's fridge and high on happiness. Unaware that the very same night it would all go crashing down.

At some point they all quiet down and go a little further into the woods than they normally would but no one pays any mind to that. And when suddenly their trio turns into a duo with the sudden absence of the birthday boy himself no one immediately starts panicking. He's been gone for ten minutes, twenty, half an hour. Kiryu tells Yuko to go back to the village, to gather everyone, make them start a search party or something while he keeps looking for her brother (the only things he'll find are the pendant he's gifted to Nishiki with the leather cord torn and the broken shards of his own hope). They never find him.

A year goes by and they hold a funeral for Nishikiyama Akira. Even though there's no body for them to bury. Yuko doesn't cry (she doesn't believe he's really dead). Neither does Kiryu (he used all of his tears up that night, the guilt choking him, and the night after that, and the night after that, and the night-). Yumi does, however. And the nice old lady who gave both Nishiki and Kiryu money for helping her do chores around the house. And the man who gave Nishikiyama a part-time job at his shop (to put at least something towards the cost of his sister's treatment, he felt so indebted to Kazama, and that debt weighed down on him). And a few of the girls and boys from Sunflower too.

Another two years pass. Kiryu moves away to the big city at the behest of Kazama. "It's important for you to continue your education," he says. ("It's important for you to move on," he keeps these words to himself). Kiryu really tries his best. Even makes a few friends (although he's still on the fence about whether he can actually call Oda his friend). It goes as well as it could have considering his circumstances. They say that time heals but Kazuma Kiryu never finds out if there's any truth to those words because he recieves a very short letter - an invitation, actually. To another funeral. But this time it's Yuko they're burying. This time they actually have a body to bury.

Tachibana offers his condolences. Oda offers him a ride to the village and back. Kiryu accepts both.

He can't help but compare this funeral to the last one he's been to. There are fewer people. Fewer tears, too. More flowers. It's quieter and feels something like closure (in truth, it's anything but). Yuko also left behind a will (more like a bunch of wishes since it wasn't an official document but the community decided to honour them anyway). Almost all of her possessions went to the kids from Sunflower, except for the Nishikiyama family house (which on paper actually belonged to Shintaro Kazama) which she left to Kiryu. He can't quite believe it when he hears it and feels his heart break under the onslaught of childhood memories. Still, he goes there later that evening. He finds that little has changed in the time he spent away from the house, from the village, from... all of this, really. There are the same pictures on the walls collecting only slightly less dust. The same books on the shelves and under the broken legs of the old pieces of furniture. The same medicine bottles and equipment in the bedroom, though doubled in quantity. Kiryu's not as devastated as he thought he'd be when he walks around what he used to call his home.

He goes through all the rooms, taking notes of every single thing he finds and every single thing he doesn't. He probably misses a bunch of things (he's not as good at that sort of thing, Nishiki's always had a much better eye for details). Once back outside, he looks for the secret stash they made back when they were teenagers. It's like going through a time capsule. There's a pack of cigarettes he and Nishiki once stole from the teacher's bag, copybooks filled with ugly doodles, dreams for the future and dried flowers and leaves, caps from soda bottles, rocks they thought looked cool, photos and birthday cards damaged by time and weather... the pendant Kiryu gave to Nishiki the last time they saw each other. And a small notebook Kiryu's never seen before. A diary of sorts, a recounting of their days together and their days apart. The handwriting is unmistakingly Yuko's.

It fills him with nostalgia, tears welling up in his eyes, unshed. His heart sinks when he finally reaches the pages where Yuko recounts the last few weeks before she-

She writes about her brother, which is understandable. What's less understandable is the fact that she speaks of him as though he was there, with her. Physically present. Kiryu could chalk it up to the girl being delusional in her dying moments but it doesn't feel right to do so. It's stupid, it's absolutely impossible, he's confused, he's hopeful, why would Yuko hide her notebook there?

The last page. A message. For Kiryu. "Please, Kazuma-kun, help my brother".

Against his better judgement, Kiryu decides to spend the night in the house. Sleep doesn't come to him but that's fine. He sits in the living room, trying to make sense of everything. He sits there until it's way past midnight, until the distant barking of the dogs quiets down, until the rustling of leaves stops, until the very air around him grows still and silent and somehow charged with strange energy. And then he hears it. Three uncertain taps against the window. Kiryu turns his head. It's him.

"Kiryu... Let me in. Please."

He does, without thinking. (He could never very well say no to Nishiki. Even if it got them both in trouble. Even if he's not real.)

The quiet is deafening. It really is him. His best friend (whom he thought dead). His kyoudai. Before Nishiki could say anything, Kiryu wraps him in a tight hug. The only heartbeat between them is Kiryu's own, thundering against his ribs. Nishikiyama doesn't let the hug last, putting some distance between them. He looks guilty, tired; looks at Kiryu with sadness, with longing and something else that he can't quite decipher yet (and it makes him scared but why?). Nishiki also looks older than Kiryu remembers. Not a 17-year-old boy anymore, no. About the same age that Kiryu is now.

Has his gaze always been so sharp? Have his fangs always been this pronounced?

They talk until their throats are hoarse. Until Nishiki pulls out a bottle with some liquid that smells strongly of iron and drinks from it and in that moment Kiryu believes everything his friend has told him. It's crazy, but he does.

Nishiki was abducted that night. Taken from them. By vampires. They hurt him. Forced him to fight other humans (just like him then) for his survival. They fed on him.

It went on and on and on... Days turned into weeks, turned into months, turned into years. Only thoughts of Yuko, and Kiryu, and Yumi kept him going. He wanted to see them again. He hoped he would. That hope was crushed when Nishikiyama met his match in the arena. No, not his match. Someone far stronger. He lost and was tossed out to die. But another vampire saved him. It was a woman, whose face he saw often among the spectators of his fights. She stood out from the crowd, since she never cheered for any of the humans. Never put any bets. Only looked at all that madness with quiet horror. "Reina" she said her name was.

She gave Nishiki blood. Her own blood, and the blood of the vampires that were much stronger and more powerful than her (but not wiser), and human blood.

He turned and it was even worse than the years of anguish he had experienced. The pain and constant thirst almost drove him mad until he was taught to deal with them.

Nishiki was given a second chance. He escaped. And ever since that moment he's been trying his damndest to help other victims of those monsters. Both, the poor imprisoned souls and the villagers who might have shared his fate otherwise.

THAT CONCLUDES MY MAD RAMBLINGS BECAUSE I HAVEN'T THOUGHT OUT WHAT HAPPENS NEXT THAT WELL

also i don't remember the last time i wrote this much in one sitting and i'm tireeeeeed. i'm not cut out to be a writer and it shows nghghghhhhhh

but! but! but! i have a couple thoughts on where the story goes:

kiryu decides to stay in the village and help nishiki

they uncover the vampires evil plans and recruit a few other characters to fight on the side of JUSTICE (i.e. kazama, who up to that point has been kind of in cahoots with the vamps - hence trying to atone by means of creating the Sunflower orphanage; kashiwagi; yumi; reina; tachibana and oda; majima, and yeah he was actually the one that defeatead nishiki and unknowingly caused him to become a vampire, also majima himself turns into a vampire later in the story thanks to a certain mad simp nishitani)

yuko comes back as a vampire

at some point the scene from my fanart happens; something along the lines of kiryu and nishiki being found by the evil vamps and being attacked. then of course nishiki saves kiryu (who's still baffled that this shit is happening to them and vampires are REAL) and tells him to run which he doesn't but it works out fine in the end

the scene of nishiki drinking kiryu's blood is a MUST because i. love. that. shit. (it's also extremely horny dfjvhsdkfhiasdfhisd)

nishiki's personality is somewhere in between his ykz0 and ykz k*wami self (like, he's much colder now but he still cares about others and does things not just for the sake of his own ambition)

idk about the end but immortal boyfriends? sounds nice?

[jamestrmtx]

Fairytale Complex - [Undertale | Sans x Reader]

[Gender Neutral, Frisk's Parent Reader | Slow Burn]

Chapter Thirteen | Waterfall (Part 4 of 4)

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As the storm worsens, so does he. He's shaking from head to toe, yet when you ask him about it, he says it's fine. An hour's passed since you booked the room, and all the banter and light-hearted nature from before has faded since then. Thunder continues to strike without a break, sending electrical appliances nearby into an on and off frenzy. You look towards the skeleton sitting farther away from you and notice how his grip on a pillow strengthens, his fear being let out through it. 

The view makes you think back on last time and how you'd dealt with the situation, leaving you to consider it again.

You sit next to him in bed and stretch your arms out when he looks at you. It's as if he's stumbled upon an alien, gaze facing yours with both caution and confusion alike. "C'mere, Serif," you offer, patting at your lap. "Take it as a thank you for everything you've done so far." You scoot closer to him and stop when you see him tense up and a bead of sweat make its way down his forehead. "I mean it."

Sans doesn't have a choice with how violent the next thunder is. He's practically sent into your lap as the lights go out, and his grip on you turns almost painful, the hardness of his touch sinking into your skin. The monster's face ends up pressed close to your chest while his hands move back down to your waist; his shaking grows prominent, even with how strong he holds onto you. Minutes pass before the lights turn back on, allegedly due to a power plant with how much weaker they glow. A murmur leaves his teeth, though none of the words can be deciphered with how wild the weather outside is. "What did you say?" you ask, bringing him closer. "I couldn't hear you." You shift your positions so that you can lay your head against the headboard and cuddle up to him more. 

His chest heaves subtly as another one strikes. "Why're you doin' this for me?" He breathes out, loosening his grip on you. "I, uh… thought you didn't feel comfortable around me."

"Are you sure you're okay to talk about that right now?" you ask, bringing an arm around his waist. "You're shaking, Sans. And I already know why, so it's... It's really no big deal." You stop to look at him through the dresser's mirror set right across from the bed, yet his face is still kept hidden from your view. "We can leave that for later, if you want."

You expect disagreement, only to receive it partially.

Sans moves away from your hold and sits up straight in bed while you stay laying down. Then, he tries to spare a glance at you, though your current positions make it awkward for you to face him back without feeling strange about it. He seems to notice that himself, having to look elsewhere to lessen that feeling as you both adjust yourselves to a better, more comfortable position. "So, uh… Thanks, (Y/N)," he says, facing away. "But you don't need to do that. If you feel like all this stuff is your responsibility, then I don't think it's okay for me to approach you like this." He flinches when another thunder strikes, yet he recovers quicker than before. "You don't have to force yourself into makin' this a date, 'cause I'm not asking that of you."

You sit up and move right behind him, holding his shoulders. "And I'm not trying to make this a date, Sans," you reply. "I'm just trying to help you with what's happening right now." You hold his waist, tensing when you feel him shudder under your touch. "Though I won't deny that I, well…" Your throat turns dry and your face grows hot, hands doing the opposite. "That it's been too long since I've felt this way." Your eyes close with the next thunder, how loud it is making even you seek some comfort from the embrace. "It feels nice to be liked, and to… to actually live life a little more. Today, I… felt so alive. Even with those guys calling me names, I had fun."

With the latest strike appearing to have been the last, Sans again shimmies out of your hold and turns to you. He meets with your gaze and a hand places itself over yours. Then, he shifts closer to you, his hand tugging for you to go lower while he goes higher.

He closes his eye sockets as his teeth brush with your cheek. Lack of experience over such a simple action reveals itself in an instant by how awkward his hand placement is on your shoulder and waist as he tries to match better with your height, and how fast his soul beats the longer he stays that way. The moment ends far too quickly, yet it's sufficient for you to be fulfilled, just as much as he appears to be when you pull back, open your eyes, and see him grinning. A brighter light's present in his irises, and -- judging by how he looks at you -- you can already tell you've given him more than enough of a reason to tease you over this in the future. "So... I take it the first date was a success?"

You return his expression with a smile and let his hand go while you fix your posture. "I thought you said you didn't want to make this a date?"

He winks and takes a hand to your cheek, fingers brushing close to your lips, but not quite. There's an unfamiliar emotion beyond that of lust or want in his gaze, and it makes more sense when you think back on what he said at the hospital regarding how he felt about physical touch, aside from all the basics established by societal norms. Rather than lust, curiosity shines in his irises, likely by how different you both are and how it would feel for the both of you to kiss on the mouth. "Only if you want it to be." A brief pause follows and a subtle, amused flare leaves his nose cavity. "How about it?"

Smile growing, you take his wrist and reply with, "I'd like that." Then, a frown returns, concern showing through the furrow in your brow. "But… What about after? I… I really don't think I'm ready to date anyone seriously yet."

The monster pulls his hand back and faces your eyes again. "That's alright," he says, chuckling. "We'll just keep doin' things like normal, pretendin' today didn't happen." Sans shifts on his seat as a sterner look crosses his gaze. "We'll give each other some time. And if ya don't return my feelings by then, I'll stop -- And we can keep the memories we've made 'til now."

"Now that..." Tugging him in for a quick hug, you then laugh, kiss his cheekbone, and pull back with a smile still intact on your face. "That sounds way too good to be true. But I like it."

• • •

It's close to midnight by the time you're done eating, showering, and settling stuff out with Undyne. You take your phone and re-read your latest conversation with her. Embarrassment overcomes your thoughts with the reminder of how both she and her girlfriend had caught you and Sans last time on the couch.

Told you it was a date!

Papyrus actually looked after Frisk most of the time today, so I can look after them 'til tomorrow morning. 

But is it really okay with you?

'Course it is!

Didn't I tell you to take as long as you need?

Take your time. ;-)

Thank you.

But could you please keep the whole date thing a secret?

I don't want Frisk to know I'm thinking about dating anyone else again.

Sure.

Dunno why you insist so much on that, but I get it.

A new message pops up. While reading, you open the door of your room and exit, ready to go off and explore more of the hotel. Though it's late, you don't want to miss out on the opportunity of extending the date for a little longer, even more now that the skeleton invited you over to the pool area. You can hear water running even as you close the door and begin walking off, reminding you he's still showering. 

Jerry came over asking where you were, btw.

The latest message Undyne sends you prompts you to keep going, now too anxious to wait and stay in one place. You rush off, not wanting to dwell too much on it. It's a short walk to get there, only having to pass by a hallway, then the lobby, and take a turn to the right. A different world's introduced to you as soon as you step in, welcomed by a large swimming pool from afar and at the center of it all, along with two smaller hot tubs closer by. There are folding chairs and their respective tables on the left, along with a busy and bustling bar at the right, ‘Happy Hour’ flashing above the entrance. All the attractions are occupied with people, each doing their own thing.

Really?

What did you tell him?

Your chest tightens as you wait for an answer. An icy wind blows by, making you shudder with the current outfit you're wearing: a one-piece swimsuit bought hastily at the small souvenir shop the hotel offered for everyone around. You stay in place, still waiting for her reply.

Told him you were running errands, but he still told me to give you this when you returned.

Her next message is a picture of a gift basket with all sorts of favourites, from sweets to flowers, and even a new work uniform, each individual piece of the correct size. A letter's tucked in-between all the items and a bright red ribbon tops it all off.

He also gave Frisk something and then tried convincing them into going with him to the beach. 

Your stomach twists and a sour note reaches your taste buds. Jerry's first attempt at getting back together had clearly been without him knowing Sans was hitting on you, so you're not sure whether he's making stronger efforts now that he's aware of it. Your legs grow weak the more you force yourself to keep on standing, now too anxious to move.

What did Frisk say?

They said they'd only go if you came with them, so now I think Jerry might make arrangements for the two of you to come.

"Your phone's gonna get damaged here."

At the sound of someone behind you, you jolt and your phone slips off your hands. Fortunately, it's stopped by a blue force, and so's your waist when you slip and almost trip on your feet. You're let go and turned around to see Sans changed into an outfit composed of beach shorts and a tank top. They're a little baggy on the sides, revealing the fact he's also bought them at the souvenir shop. "You okay?" he asks, furrowing his gaze.

You grab your phone back and put it away, nodding before replying with, "...I think so."

Side-by-side, you walk with him to a pair of folding chairs. There, you sit, take off your towel, and set it aside. "Jerry's still, well... trying to get back with me, I guess." A smile forms when you see the monster's gaze look away, avoiding to meet with your swimsuit more than with your eyes or anywhere else. "You can look, y'know. Or are you getting shy?"

Sans takes the towel off his shoulders and sets it next to yours. Then, he shakes his head once, still avoiding you. "Just bein' cautious." Finally, he faces you, a grin showing on his skull. "Still haven't forgotten how stern you can be, so I've gotten used to bein' careful around you."

"Really?" you taunt, snickering. You stand up and begin your walk with him to the pool. "I was thinking the opposite with how shameless your flirting's been since day one of us being more than strangers."

"There's a difference, pal." He sits on the edge, irises drifting off to the hot tubs, where a buff bunnyman and an even buffer fishman sit at. They're both hugging each other, the former resting his head on the other's chest, eyes closed shut and body relaxed. "My intention's not to insult you or make you angry."

Your smile grows; the upbeat energy of your surroundings gives you courage to challenge him again. "What are your intentions then, Sans? I'm curious."

You slip a foot into the water and a shiver follows. While you stand by for it to warm, you pay attention to the monster, expectant of an answer. Oddly enough, he doesn't confront your question and chooses to sink himself completely into the pool -- no wait needed. His irises avoid your eyes, until a few swimmers nearby move further away from your spot. "I guess I've never really done somethin' like this before. And then my brother suggested I made some new friends, so when I saw you, I kinda just went for it."

"So flirting's your way of making friends?"

Again, you're welcomed with a reaction far different from your expectations. He looks down at the water and rubs the back of his neck, a laugh -- nervous and quiet -- leaving his teeth. "...The way you confronted me back when we were at Waterfall," he begins, facing you, "it kinda took me off guard, so I went with the first thing I had in mind to try and ease out the mood." 

A human toddler dives into the water, the splash that accompanies him almost reaching you despite his tiny self. That's enough to distract you and smile, though you look back to witness the skeleton's done the same thing. It's without a doubt he's trying not to confess his thoughts right now, so you give him space to back off if he wants to. "I…" He looks back to you, continuing with, "I was surprised to see you come up to me like that, pointing out faults I was aware we had, all without hesitation -- both back then and on the day we first met. So I guess you could call that me fallin' for you at first sight. You called me out on my mistakes after Jerry told you the truth about me, and you accepted yours without me even havin' the chance to say anything about it. You came over apologizin' for lettin' Frisk slip from your care, but then you also didn't exactly tolerate our own choices when you found out the, well... morally ambiguous implications behind my kinds' freedom."

You dip the rest of your body in the water and sit beside him. "So you fell for me at first sight?" you joke, nudging him. "I find that real hard to believe."

He chuckles and leans in closer. "Guess it was kinda more of an admiration I had for ya, at the beginning."

You do the same, sparing a glance at others nearby to make sure they aren't looking. "...I also recall you saying my stubbornness was hot?"

He nods, giving into another cheek kiss from your part this time -- one far more fleeting than the one shared at your bedroom. "Very."

The two of you back away as quickly as that moment lasts, avoiding PDA at all costs -- not only for the younger ones around, but for the current state of your relationship, and what that implies. You'd already crossed plenty of the lines and limits you'd set for yourself in terms of dating. Even the simple act of having accepted his invitation is enough to surpass them all. "I'm… I'm sorry I can't make this a serious thing," you say, looking aside. "Maybe you said it was okay to have only one date, but I... I guess it doesn't exactly feel right for me to lead you on like this."

The monster pulls you against him, giving you a hug from behind. "See what I mean, pal?" He's the one teasing you now, hands tickling your waist with how careful his movements are. "You're doin' it again."

To defend yourself, you take Sans's hands, push him away, and bring him down into the water, concluding the feat with a laugh. 

Proud, you turn around -- expecting to see him drenched and unamused -- yet what you receive is prompt payback for your actions. His magic grabs your wrist, pulling you in with him. You close your eyes tight in defense, and the sensation of slow sinking is soon interrupted by you bumping right into him. 

He helps you stay afloat, though you're unable to see him, water drops clouding your vision.

"Karma," he reminds you, chuckling as you both make it safe out of the pool.

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[milktyama]

karasuno boys on first dates pt.2

part 1

a/n: idk about yall but this pandemic making me feel extra lonely </3 LIKE I CAN’T EVEN HUG MY OWN FRIENDS FFFFFF. sucks being a physical person during this time. i’m also procrastinating from math homework, words make more sense than numbers

genre: fluff, lighthearted, g!n s/o, kinda?? cliche??

includes: tanaka, sugawara, asahi, daichi

wc: 1489

tanaka ryunosuke

he is the type to bring you to a movie date

classic and simple

he wants to recreate that oh so romantic moment of casually laying his arm over your shoulder and bring you slightly closer together

maybe if he wants to get a little spicy have you lay your head on his shoulder

but let’s move a few steps back to the asking out part

oh dear god

this man, although he is a mad gentleman, cannot handle feelings for the life of him

and in all honesty, probably took him a little far too long to ask you out

he had this whole scenario out of a movie in his head, all the vibes of a protagonist; boy meets girls moment

and the second he musters his courage and walk up to you during the end of the day, he freezes up

needed ennoshita to give you that sweet insight so you made the first move yourself or it would’ve taken a solid month or two before he could manage to greet you and start some small talk

he does not deal with feelings too well

fast forward to the date

he suggests a a rather romantic movie since he is kinda that type of guy

but you were feeling rather active today and suggests an action movie

and honestly he couldn’t thank you more because although he’s a hopeless romantic, probably could not stand a 2 hour romance movie

he doesn’t like to be called out by a movie </3

anyways, remember that movie scenario in his head? yea that’s out of the question

for one, you two were too hype during the movie; something about superheroes kicking ass is just oh so exciting

secondly, he was wimping out a little

at the end of the movie, you just, shine the brightest smile he has ever seen on you

and oh baby does he feel so HONOURED to be the cause of that smile

but the next thing you do absolutely makes his heart swell

you ask him for a second date

we did it gamers

quite ironically you guys go on a arcade game for your second date, and this mans does not give you an easy time, but you just love that competitiveness in him

sugawara koushi

starting at the beginning, he asks you out

he keeps it simple and straightforward

calls you out right before you exit school buildings, and asks you if you wanna watch practice because he’s obviously trying to woo you a little before his nerve wrecking question

and you gladly agree

i mean who can say no to mr. refreshing sugawara koushi

when he walks through the gym doors and the members seeing you walk right behind him, they would totally kinda misread the situation

i mean no questions asked when it comes to the boys having some insight to the setter’s feelings, however they were just a few steps too forward

saddest part it was DAICHI himself who went “woahh suga you already asked her out? good job man!”

his soul never left his body as fast as that time

like his boys really ruined that one time he wanted to go perfect

but it’s fine

because although you two were in a little of a blushing mess, you lightly grip his sleeve and murmured the cutest “i’m free on saturday afternoon”

saying that he short circuited is honestly an understatement

saturday rolls around and you two unanimously agreed to baking class date

it’s just a really fun and interactive date idea and suga is so in for activity dates

even though you two knew it was gonna get a little messy, yall SIMPS still put on some of your fav outfits

it was so worth it though ‘cause suga’s reaction to your outfit was just all you needed in the world

the date is really fun and playful

totally not at you two flouring each other haha nooo....

he walks you home just before you two part ways, his bold little butt places his hand on top of your head, pecks your forehead and gives you the widest smile

“pottery painting next?”

azumane asahi

asahi is a simple and shy man

i’m pretty sure that’s the obvious

and he would def opt for a simple, at home date

of course only if the other party is comfortable enough for that

don’t get me started at how he asked you

asahi is such a baby and probably has so much trouble with expressing his emotions on the whim/real time

he’ll probably go for a love letter (damn cheesey) just in case he messes up his wording and turns into a blabbering mess trying to make up for the previous mistake

i can imagine his love lever being just the most aesthetically pleasing

like homeboy pulled one of those scrapbooking, journaling people on instagram

plus points he did a wax seal thing (so fancy oml)

most likely put in your locker and then just RAN out of the place like usain bolt

and for the cherry on top, you would return a letter with the same amount of effort (probably not as pretty as his tho LMFAO) accepting his little date uwu

when the date comes, he would set up and clean his house to the tip top utmost cleanliness it could be

at his house, you two would probably watch some movies, play some board games, bake a little and so on

but the highlight of the date is when while watching your like 3rd movie, you doze off into asahi’s shoulder and boy you should’ve seen his FACE

so read and so cute

*insert pleading eyes emoji x2000*

he would gently stroke your hair, careful trying not to wake you up

but unfortunately for him you are a light sleeper

so you would wake up but allow him to run his fingers through your hair

and then when you decide to wake wake up, you tell him that when he strokes your head feels so nice and makes you feel safe AIJFSOLDKRG

and you ask him if you can do the same to him or try styling his hair

and how could he say no to you?

you two spend hours playing with each other’s hair (or only his if you have short hair)

oh and you took so any adorable pictures of him

he got so flustered but it was fine if it was you

sawamura daichi

as a man with the biggest appetite in the series, no surprise that daichi would bring you to a local restaurant for a little date

daichi is also a confident man

so he would puff his chest and put the effort to approach you

though as confident as i make him out to be, there’s still light pink dusted on the apples of his cheeks and hand awkwardly scratching the back of his neck as he makes eye contact with you

he’ll have you watch their practice and right after you two would make your to his favorite local restaurant for dinner

also during practice the third and second years would NOT give their captain a break while the first years are probably either too confused or don’t care (COUGH COUGH TSUKISHIMA)

anyways after practice and walking to the place is literally so perfect because sun in setting and the atmosphere is so romantic

you two probably walk right beside each other and making small talk when daichi is hinting that he wants to hold you hand by brushes that back of your hands together often

BUT YOU’RE PROBABLY SO SHY THAT EVERYTIME IS HAPPENS YOU JUST BLUSH AND APOLOGIZE AND EVENTUALLY U PUT YOUR HAND INSIDE YOUR BLAZER POCKET?????

HONEY YOU CAN ONLY BE SO  D E N S E

n e ways

knowing daichi, he probably goes to this restaurant very often and knows the menu like the back of his hand

so he would ask you for your preferences and then give you his recommendations based on that

he just wants to make sure you will enjoy your meal to the fullest

as a regular, he is also well acquainted with the restaurant owner

so like when mr. restaurant owner sees daichi walk in with another person while sporting a very clear blush on his face, he KNOWS something is up

while serving your orders, he was being sNEAKY by giving yall a freebie

and it turns out to be like the couple special

like those very pretty sparkly milkshakes with one of those straws that has two sides to it branching out

and like he refuse to serve yall other drinks FAGKFHJADH so you two had to with the milkshake and like oopsie moment when you two decide to go for it at the same time

the restaurant owner DEF took a pick of that exact moment and gave it to daichi as a gift AHAHAH