#i was really lucky

[sparklywaistcoat]

Click the link for an interactive tool for creating a safety plan for leaving an abusive relationship. Below there's more information about leaving as well.

Although the tool itself is a good one, please use it with caution if you are in an abusive relationship. Abuse often escalates if the abuser finds out that you're thinking about leaving.

Don't leave printouts where your abuser can find them.

Use a device your abuser doesn't have access to, or else be sure your abuser can't open your computer or phone or tablet and clear your browsing history when you're done using this.

Commit what you need to to memory if you can't write it down safely.

I cannot stress enough how important it is never to give your significant other access to your phone or computer if you can at all help it.

You're not proving that you're trustworthy or that you love them by giving them access; you're giving them an opening to violate your privacy and, if they're abusive, a way to further control you.

(Pro tip: If your partner is demanding access to your phone and computer, that's a major red flag. Run.)

I also cannot stress enough that you should keep a bank account in your own name.

If you don't already have an account like this, please open one ASAP if you can do so safely. Joint accounts are fine and dandy, but you also need to be able to control your own money in case you have to get out.

(Pro tip: If your partner demands that you pool all your money into a joint account and gets mad if you want to open or keep your own separate account, that's a major red flag. Run.)

Things that I did when I was preparing to leave my relationship included:

secretly opening a post office box so that my abuser no longer had access to my mail

secretly ordering vital records for myself and my children and sending them to the PO box (birth certificates, marriage certificate)

secretly opening a safe deposit box at the bank for documents and other items I didn't want my abuser to have access to or to know about, especially once I hired an attorney to start divorce proceedings

secretly opening a storage unit where I kept suitcases with clothes for myself and my kids in case we had to leave suddenly (fortunately this never happened)

while I was still living with my abuser, only having phone conversations with my attorney and other necessary professionals when I was out of the house and in a place where I couldn't be overheard, and telling my attorney to never call me without an appointment

secretly opening an email account that my abuser didn't have the address to and using that for all my divorce correspondence and planning

when my abuser was out of the house, making copies of family financial records that my abuser had in his possession, and then hiding the copies where I was reasonably sure he wouldn't find them. (Do this if you are married or otherwise have joint assets because having those records makes it harder for your spouse/partner to hide assets or prevent you from getting your share. Also do spy shit like making sure you put everything back exactly as you found it. Be very, very careful if you choose to do this step, because if your abuser finds out it can escalate the situation. I was lucky that my ex wasn't particularly nosy, not least because he didn't think I had it in me to do that kind of thing. Your abuser may be different.)

keeping the non-emergency number for the police department and the contact info and addresses for battered women's shelters in my phone contacts

I was lucky that I had the money to be able to do things like open a PO box and rent a storage unit. If you can't afford these kinds of things, find a trusted friend or family member that you can send your mail to and store documents and other things with. Make sure that this is a friend or family member who agrees that you are in an abusive relationship; you don't want to enlist a flying monkey by mistake if you can help it.

Please, please, please be canny with this, and be safe.

[emidy]

Dan Heng!!!!!

[bumblingbabooshka]

Vulcan teen on Vulcan [tiktok] saying "I have just lost track of my father in the grocery store." The camera turns to show the viewers the grocery store in which almost every single older middle-aged man has a bowlcut and long robes. Camera turns back to show the teen's face which is expressionless and yet communicates all it needs to.

[demaparbat-hp]

He truly did.

[what-am-i-doing-in-this-fandom]

Yeah, I don't know about you, Fidds, but I'd fold at this 🙏

Previous!!

Next!!

First!!

[curioscurio]

I'm rewatching Steven Universe and I will never forgive Fandom for what it did to her

[ggren-mainz]

I see so many people feeling all smug at those "damn conservatives who will finally see the mistake they made!" And you know a while ago I would've agreed, but seeing it all now, I can't. I can't be happy, I can't be smug, there's nothing to celebrate.

People are gonna die, conservatives, democrats people who didn't vote...

People are gonna and ARE starving, losing jobs, get into poverty and god. I can't even feel like we have any gotcha. This is horrible.

I don't want people to die because they were never taught better, because they were uneducated and/or manipulated. And the thing is, I'm not even American, but I just know, everyday looking at the news, that things are getting bad, and they're getting bad for all of us. It hasn't reached me yet, but how long till it does?

To everyone who lives in America, I wish you luck and a strong will. Don't give up. And now more than ever you need to be united, don't let them tear you apart, because they will try. Though times ahead, but we will get over them.

[inkskinned]

the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.

three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.

two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.

their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.

one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.

i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.

i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.

and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?

you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.

a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.

someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.

[lazylittledragon]

ok someone please correct me if i'm wrong but am i weird for thinking those 'audiobooks don't count as reading' posts are ableist as fuck????

[linipik]

Keith with traditional style tats🔥

[bunnyboy-juice]

my lovely mutuals and followers and circle of dykes. i am BEGGING YOU to stop reblogging that "NSAIDS while on spiro damages your liver" post. there have been MANY additions in the comments expanding on the risk factors of mixing these medications (and i HIGHLY recommend looking in the comments. @/boringkate assesses the risk beautifully in there, and many others are in the reblogs expanding on the interactions and risks as well). all those aside - the major risk of mixing NSAIDs and any diuretic (not limited to, but including ibuprofen snd spiro) is RENAL (KIDNEY) PROBLEMS!!! NOT LIVER!!! and the most frequent version ive seen to that post does Not do a good enough job clarifying that "renal function" is related to your kidneys, not your liver. there are some effects that will happen on the liver eventually of course, but the premise of the interactions is wrong in and of itself and this kind of misinformation is kind of dangerous to just take at face value/without curiousity

i encourage you to read the actual drugs.com summary on the interactions between NSAIDs and spiro that keeps being referenced in that post (more on this under the cut). it is a moderate interaction manageable with increased hydration (your kidneys love water!) and, if you're taking spiro under the supervision of a doctor, monitoring of your renal function via blood tests. and i understand feeling betrayed learning there are potential interactions between all NSAIDs and diuretics because these risks are often not clearly communicated by doctors themselves, but in the pharmacy and usually in that packet that comes with your meds that most people are more likely to toss than read - but please do not make sudden rapid changes to your healthcare plans or work yourself into a panic on ever taking a pain med ever again based on that post and PLEASE fact check things you read on the internet before spreading it as Health Facts, even if its just looking up what different words mean to understand more of what you're reading. i also really do encourage y'all to read on how kidneys work and this is a really nice overview

the risk of kidney problems mostly occurs if you are (1) taking regular doses of both medications (2) NOT drinking enough fluids (3) not communicating with your doctor about all the medications you are taking. if you are taking spiro as a treatment provided by a doctor and are worried about kidney problems after that post, by all means talk to them and ask about getting a blood test to check your kidneys function/health!! im not discouraging this!! your doctor likely isnt bringing this up in the first place though because (in my cursory glance over the sources) many of these studies cited even in the drugs.com article "specific" to ibuprofen and spiro are about a variety of diuretics interactions with a variety of NSAIDs. the ones that arent paywalled are also either acute case studies about elderly patients on diuretics (so who Already have kidney problems/elimination issues) who developed heart issues after diuretics treatement or observational studies specifically on men in good health ages 20-38 to specifically look at drug interactions in the body. in the more acute cases, with proper management/alternative medications almost every single case was reversible and resolvable. many of these medications in these papers also are ones I have not heard of or taken, so i did look up every single drug i didnt recognize by name references to confirm my initial assumption that the reason this is labeled a Moderate instead of low risk interaction is because All NSAIDS and diuretics have potential interactions (confirmed also that the major effect is that NSAIDS have the potential to reduce the efficacy of diuretics, which leads to fluid and salt retention, which can lead to other issues - namely heart issues in the most extreme cases) with variable effects based on specific combination of the drugs used, the patients specific health, and the dosage (not just the size of dose, but the timing as well).

as an aside: if you habitually are taking frequent (read: daily/scheduled, not a one off for a headache or other body pains) doses of OTC NSAIDs, Regardless of taking diuretics, you NEED to tell your doctor because even though its available over the counter (at least in the US) it is still a major medication in your life/relevant to your physiochemistry!! OTC medications are often overlooked by doctors and people alike because they are seen as ubiquitous and to many doctors OTC pain meds, like NSAIDS, are assumed be used in acute pain situations where the dosage is minimal/infrequent enough it will likely have little to no long term effect with other medications.

[haridraws]

what if a puff sleeve renaissance doublet, but it’s also a puffer jacket

[chocostrwberry]

One lucky girl 🐞

Something to celebrate the master post!!

And for everyone’s support bc WOW?? I get so many nice asks about my art and it really helps me get through my day,, and I wouldn’t even be making a master post if it wasn’t for everyone’s interest in my au. It really motivates me and I hope that I can continue to share my ideas with y’all!! THANK YOU EVERYONE!! 🌈🥹🎉🩷🫶🫶

[8pxl]

7 yrs ago it was all a dream, but this yr marks my 5th year of being a pixel artist who supports themselves 100% thru art. kinda crazy to see my dreams to fruition!

[atompalace-official]

January the 20th is Atomian Sylveon Day! ⚜️🩵🎀💐✨

why today? because this is the date I first designed her on a whim in 2022, and exactly a year later I happened to finish her most iconic (so far!) illustration. I thought the coincidence was so fateful! 🌟 Atomian Sylveon has been my gorgeous and inspirational Pokésona for 3 years now, and I think that’s well worth celebrating 💝✨

[afterthelambs]

Joker during the early-rank Akechi era is so funny because from his POV he's living the teenage dream. Imagine doing basically nothing yet you get noticed by a cute idol who then takes you on dates and calls you special and interesting non-stop. Bro probably felt so proud. 'Me and the bad bitch i pulled by briefly disagreeing with him' kinda thing