#i was raised atheist

[phantom-of-the-501st]

The Metatron and Crowley

⚠️ Spoilers for Good Omens 2 ⚠️

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I keep seeing people saying that The Metatron hates Crowley because he knows that he may be a threat when paired up with Aziraphale: he's trying to get him out of the way because of the whole 25 Lazari thing.

But I stand by the fact that he doesn't just hate him for that. I don't think it started there. Nor do i think it started at Armageddon. That bastard has hated Crowley since he fell from Heaven because there is no way that he wouldn't be pissed off by someone ruining Heaven's perfect reputation.

"For one Prince of Heaven to be cast into the outer darkness makes a good story. For it to happen twice makes it look like there is some sort of institutional problem."

This suggests that Gabriel retaliating isn't the first time this has happened: someone has done this before. So, who could it be? I mean, it could be referring to Lucifer, but I doubt it. A) He's not a particularly integral character in the plot, so it doesn't seem totally necessary to bring him up. B) We already have a fallen angel (who is significant to the plot), who appears to have been very high up the corporate ladder in Heaven before he fell.

"You'd have to be a throne or a dominion, or above"

Crowley said that Heaven never changes their passwords, but that still implies he would've had to have been a throne, a dominion, or higher when he was there. And he says in episode one that he worked closely with upstairs on the plans for the universe. Crowley was high-ranking, one of the top. I've even seen suggestions that he could've been a seraphim. A high-ranking angel associated with flames that has direct contact with God? Reminds you of someone, does it not?

Now let's say that Crowley was a seraphim (or at least ranked dominion or above), The Metatron wouldn't be too happy with an angel of that status (who also played a very big hand in the creation of the entire universe) questioning God's plan and ultimately falling to Hell. Bit of a dark mark on Heaven's reputation, isn't it?

"Always asking damn fool questions, too"

Hmm... you mean the same angel who became a demon after asking questions? That's what he remembers Crowley for. The questions. The questions that led him to fall. The Metatron isn't going to forget a high-ranking Angel falling after they questioned The Almighty.

The Metatron has always hated Crowley. Or at least, he has since Crowley fell. And now the demon is hanging around with Aziraphale, preventing Armageddon and unintentionally performing 25 Lazari miracles. No wonder he wants him out the way.

It's not just the one miracle. It's the fact that a fallen angel, who has already left a dark mark on Heaven's reputation, is now continuously causing more chaos and encouraging other angels (like Aziraphale) to question the true intentions and behaviour of Heaven. He's been making Aziraphale question things for millenia! Crowley is causing institutional problems and The Metaron despises him for it.

Suffice to say, Crowley has been in his bad books for a very, very long time.

[bruciemilf]

Idk if you've seen this before, but I think you'd like it. In a comic, where Bruce was a teenager, his priest told him to go to confession daily because the priest believed that he would die/get murdered at any moment. Bruce believed like he was sinful, rotten, and irredeemable, so he acted like it.

It's just gshsidnsfxusnsshs. I love Teen Bruce so much. Babygirl, you're not fundamentally doomed or evil. You're just 15

HEY???????

only priests in Gotham, man. Well. And every red state.

[menlove]

the way this website balks at the term "culturally christian" is so funny to me like. oh shit you mean the religion our government and culture is structured around might impact you even if you're atheist and ESPECIALLY if you're ex-christian? noooo it's the people using it to describe a phenomenon of western culture that are wrong

[ricksanchezbignaturals]

rick baby if you're not going to hell nobody is

[audreyrose7]

There's always some random stranger on the internet that understands exactly how to explain something better than you ever could yourself

[zenaidamacrouras1]

Took my 7 and 9 year old to church for the first time because their grandma was playing the bells and they wanted to support her because she always goes to their cello concerts.

Last year we had a situation where their cousin was saying that Christmas was started when the Maccabees and the baby Jesus were stuck in a cave with a lamp that lasted seven nights and my kids were like yeah that makes sense you have that story totally right.

Also they often ask why so many churches have Ts all over them but I don't want to talk about crucifixion because it's gross and weird so I always say I dunno. They must like Ts?

So anyway we haven't been super diligent about the Christian thing. So before church I warned them they have to behave at church similar to how we behave at the ballet. That made sense to them.

Here are their takeaways:

Kid one. "I liked the cranberry sauce we put on the bread." Kid two: "maybe it was grape juice?" Kid one: "but it was a yummy magic potion, anyway."

They were interested in communion and drew a bunch of pictures of chalices with potions bubbling in them.

Kid two: "Yeah, i liked the tasty snacks"

Kid two: "i liked singing but I kept aaying that Cress word like Criss on accident." Me: "Do you mean Christ?" "Yeah, that one. Whatever it means."

What did you learn at church?

"that the curse of Jesus says we will neverrr die." (Spooky voice)

"I think jesus is supposed to be a blessing? Not an evil curse?"

Do you have any questions about church?

Kid 2: "if god isn't real how could Jesus be real? It doesn't really make sense."

Me: "how do you know god isn't real?"

7 year old Kid stares at me like I am the dumbest thing that ever existed. "How could god be real? God is just old stories. Which god even is it?"

[importantandunavoidable]

did anyone else grow up atheist not because you were raised by atheist parents but because you went to church every week as a kid and you kind of figured it was a community thing and everyone else was just speaking metaphorically/playing along re: god

[cheapcheapfaker]

“put the Christ back in Christmas” the self flagellation I’ve done trying to get my kids first photo with Santa cannot be described as anything less than catholic wdym

[vault-kid]

i like to personally think that the Lone Wanderer, obviously raised religious (christian) to some degree, had their incredulity with religion for good after seeing James die.

or maybe even after James left, and they were forced to be the Wasteland's errand person using their morals and beliefs for the good of humanity, but ultimately just being used.

faith slowly fading, turning into hatred and resentment, or maybe just a lost soul wondering why God abandoned them just like everyone else did.

[what-have-i-unleashed]

imagine being so acutely self-aware that you know anyone remotely interested in you and your way of thinking is a red flag and yet you can't help but continue being a horrible person and exploit them anyway

[junglejim4322]

Once on here I polled what religion people thought I was raised as and got 40% Christian and I realized all of you know literally nothing about anything

[the-oracle-of-the-lost]

ok embarrassing confession – my knowledge about Christianity is incredibly selective (i know a lot about the impacts of Christianity and a bit about Church history, different denominations, general theology, etc) but i've never read the Bible and was not raised in a Christian environment so i genuinely didn't know why a star was so symbolic to Christmas until the latest Doctor Who special. i knew it was Christmas related because there's usually a star on top of Christmas trees and you get star shaped cookie cutters and the like but it never occurred to me that the star served a purpose i thought it just looked nice or something.

[queenie-ofthe-void]

Watching X-files for the first time... Why was I fully expecting Scully to be psychic??

There was so much set-up with her sister, and the stuff with her dad. Her weird dreams.

And then it just... never happened.

[brightlotusmoon]

Why is Calvinism...

Like that?

[audreyrose7]

[karokawwo]

god get me out of here