#i was originally gonna add an actual background but i dont want this to take two weeks so

[caluupin]

sumeru big three (that come in pairs)

[casually-salad]

howdy there and welcome to a Cutie Pox Chronicles behind the scenes post!!!!! its gonna be long so im keeping it below the cut, this is skippable but if you want to read it you can!!

SO welcome to the depths... so heres what were going to talk about today - the yukki ponna, some cut content, fine line and some character details, and then some personal stuff! lets get into it

so, as was predicted a couple times, the weather change and disharmony is real important to the story - its been foreshadowed sense chapter one! but theres one clear problem with it and its the shows original frost horse. as i think everyone is aware for decades indigenous people have asked to not take their mythos out of their context (( read more on that here , and here!)). so for CPC i have rewritten them to be based off the Yuki onna, a Japanese yokai! although they work fundamentally the same - they feed off of disharmony and infighting, not only now do they freeze whoever they are around they also kidnap ponies once they are fully frozen! Theyre brought up into the clouds and used to make them more powerful - however they can be stopped in the same way as in the show. here is one of the initial pieces of concept art i did for them - making their bodies look more like a kimono, and i played with giving them black hair too but i didnt like it.

speaking of concept art... there are a LOT of pannels that get cut while im working, this past comic had about 18 pages that i cut down for time and for my sanity, but i share a lot of WIP panels on jayrrators server so i still have some and thought i would share them here, in the read more will be the context and why they were cut!

NOW THIS i am glad i have. when i draw an infected i do make them a ref sheet but i DO NOT share or save these because i dont wanna spoil what they look like buuuut this one i did. i actually had one for minty that i was gonna add here, but deleted it accidentally, shown here is orange swirl and globe trotter

but on the topic of showing off some ponies i have one i wanna talk about and its the fine line problem

the question ive gotten the most is who the hell is this and i think its time to talk about who she is. Fine line first shows up in the season one finale, the grand galloping gala, and she then shows up as a canterlot incidental form then on out primarily when theyre at the castle. shes shows up at cadences wedding and gets killed by the smooze (( not really )).

okay we get who she is but WHY. well part of the point of the comic was to give some love to the background ponies like the early fandom i was engrossed with growing up. and to me, she is one of the most background ponies. she has no dialogue, no special moments, but yet she has a very enchanting design! when i first saw her i really became obsessed with her. but she almost wasnt a part of the comic.

when i was choosing ponies it was a throw up between her - orange swirl (( as seen above )), strawberry sunrise, and dan tee dove! i needed a pegasus pony, and someone who wasnt WHITE or eggshell because theres too many of them. but... she fit none of them. she in cannon is a unicorn and white, but after talking it over with some friends and almost choosing orange swirl i just had to go with her.

so i updated her design to what i needed, shes no longer a unicorn or eggshell which makes her look more like an OC but most of the background ponies get a small upgrade to their designs so it just makes sense to me. for personality we only know shes a nanny and was born in manehattan, so i made her have a personality that would work well with kids, and made her older to fit her general vibe. and then i paired her with the only OC in the whole comic who is yougurt! why didnt i use a different calf? well get this, there are NO names i could find!!!! so screw it!!!! baby baby boy!!!!!!!!

but yeah thats the history for finest lineist!

and as requested here is the pronouns for ever character that has plot significance: from now on ill be including it with the characters introduction. although outside of the story i do get more headcannony for them but to keep things simple in the story they generally stick to what they are in cannon! i know i probably forgot some but -

and here we are at the end! this story will be a year old in 2 months, and so as you may guess with a long story like this i am getting very, very burnt out. from here on out im going to be slowing down some. were offically half way there and i have something big planned for 2/20/2025 if i make it there! thanks for reading and sticking around! i also wanted to remind everyone that THIS STORY IS INTERACTIVE!!!!!! you can send asks to some of the characters basically any that are on screen up there. you can also ask to see some things, although it might take me a while to get to it because there is a timeline im working from but you can tell them things!!! please do!

ill see ya around later!

[boozois]

i hope this doesn't come off as rude or anything but im just curious, how do you make your art, i just found your account and it looks awesome, im just really curious about the process honestly:3

not rude at all! it's actually a pretty simple process, but i'll explain as much as i can

so i'll find a background, usually these are photos on liminal space communities that are newer. sometimes i take photos myself and use that. i look for really dark photos, and specifically photos that are gonna work with the angles i have.

that leads into the next part, which is choosing a photo of a borzoi to mess around with. i usually choose this based on what picture i have. that way i can have an easier time editing it. so i select the picture based on lighting, angle, and also the quality. i try to use high quality images, because (1.) it's better to have more to work with than you need, and (2.) it's what works best when removing the background. you can do this manually on ibis paint, but it's so much easier to do it with a website. there's a lot that'll turn your image into a transparent png.

once i got all that, i put it together. i do this all in ibis paint x. i put the dog a bit higher than it is realistically, and extend the features. sometimes i add different heads or other attributes. i change the lighting by adding different colors and blending. i use a few filters, including color balance, blur/zoom, and unsharp mask.

while i'm doing this, i like to make a little story up about the new creature i made. then i use the captions to kinda tell it. there is actually a little bit of "lore" around some of the dogs, and there's repeat characters. i like this part of it the most, this was why i originally made this account. it's just hard to keep a character, plus i dont operate a side blog and dont want to. world building has always been the coolest thing to me and this is a super cool way to practice it. this account hasn't even been here a year and i've learned a lot.

anyway, thanks for asking! having lots of fun and it's cool to see that people are interested in what i'm doing.

[rurifangirl]

✨ ^ ^ ✨

🔮🧤(・ω・)🧤🔮

‼️Fill out this if you want to be tagged in any of my content‼️

I'm also on everskies and instagram rn with the same name as my tumblr <3

{🪻Basic info🪻}

So heya! You can call me Ruru/Creep or whatever you like, I don't really mind as long as It ain't offensive n stuff.

Remember that I'm a minor, so I won't interact w anything adult related, nor do I want to be in those. Ty

And to add on that, although it's true that I'm sex indifferent, that doesn't mean I want to be thrown nsfw at. Please respect my boundaries.

I use any pronouns [I do have a preference for He/Him] (+Any Neo) like my bio said.

I like art/to draw in general as it helped me going through stuff, n I'm here to mostly vibe, but if ya need anything from me (Whether it's talking/taggin triggers n stuff cuz I forget to do It) feel hella free to invade my in box bout It.

{🥀Socials I'm on🥀}

Discord: Ruru#9210

Reddit: CreepOwO

Pinterest: @Ruruu_17

Instagram: @rurifangirl

Cookie run kindom acc: RuriKazamasHoe (Pure Vanilla server)

Tiktok: @rurifangirl

Rosario's side blog: @blossomfang

Writing blog: @rurus-writing

Shou's side blog: @shousbox

Kayn's side blog: @kaynsmoon

Neptune's side blog: @octussy

Morte's side blog: @mortes-breath

Other oc blog stuff: @tf-ya-doing-here

{🪻Fandoms I'm actively in/will probably post about more than once tbh🪻}

Dark souls (1-3)

Elden ring

Bloodborne

Fear and hunger (+ Termina)

Hades and Hades 2

League of legends

Hazbin Hotel

Helluva boss

Dmc 3

Jjba

Beastars

Dragon Raja

Devilman (Crybaby/original)

Junji Ito

Monster High

The vampire dies in no time

(once i get the fckin Money blasphemous and blasphemous 2)

(ALSO HOLLOW KNIGHT GOD DAMN IT)

OUTDATED OC POSTS ON (I DONT HAVE THE HEART TO DELETE THEM)

Own Ruri essay. (old; doesn't count)

The big lore post (How the gang met/Where do they live/how are they affected by their past).

Qiran's and Shou's relationship.

The magic post.

World building in Avril Quinn n Bones story.

The Reeders and Kingdoms.

Basic plot stuff.

Nothing yet...

Syndra (Kamisama kiss)

{ tag info 🪻}

Anything about my ocs/mcs Is tagged in their relative tags, for example my Kayn stuff will be tagged in #kayn and so on (Basically putting an # w their name on).

Finnaly adding a tag whenever I speak bout random stuff, that bein #rurutalks so it's easier for ppl to flirt It out.

All posts bout a specific fandom will be tagged w that name so no worries .

Gonna be adding #ruruasks for any ask I recive from now on.

(I'm also gonna put #rurusocs in case I'm talking bout ocs/my ocs related posts.) This Is unfortunately vry old and for vry few posts so . When the time comes and i rework everybody u will get a new tag

Requests will be also tagged as #rurusrequests.

All of my dog's posts will be tagged w #🤍balto🤍 cuz he deserves It.

All my posts bout me talkin in italian/italy related post will be tagged as #rurubutitalian

All of my posts bout shows/animes/videogames and everything's that Is spoilerish Is gonna be tagged as #spoiler cus I just realized how many posts are like that. So id suggest to filter that

All my ruri posts will also be tagged as #🤍Ruri my beloved🤍 because I'm too attached to this bitch so much and now I'm gettin y'all sucked up w It.

Cus @a-chaotic-dumbass is sendin cursed shoes pics and sayin "this shou?😍" I decided to make a new tag called #Shou's asks cus this shit Is so funny

Status : Closed! (Number of requests currently not done: 0) (0 slots open)

{🪻Drawing request🪻}

(Outdated, dm me for any questions!)

🪻Info🪻

Will draw:

Ocs/Mcs (with a reference ofc)

Any fandom (even if I don't know It) as long as I get the vibes from it

Little bit of Blood/gore ( If asked for; in any case ya can dm me)

Ship art (Unless it's p*do)

Some animals actually, even if It'll take much longer for them.

What I WON'T draw

Furries/ complicated animals

Backgrounds that are too complicated

NSFW/BDSM (I'm a minor and It makes me uncomfortable so)

Mechas

{🥀Rules bout it🥀}

I'll take my time w em, so please don't come for them, I never know lmao. For asking for em ya just got to go either dm me for It or ask in my inbox w references for It(Pose; character and general idea y'know)

That's all for now, It'll be updated if anything changed though 🤍

I'm adding at the end my discord simpery apology video cuz shit Is funny alright

[kaaytea]

S/O does their makeup

⤷Includes: Akaashi, Kuroo, Bokuto, Sugawara

A/N: wow look I did self insert stuff for once, absolutely wild. I had a blast writing this so enjoy :))

----------------------------------------------------------

Akaashi

The both of you were lying on the couch in the living room, he was lying on top of you while you scrolled through Instagram

You landed on a post with a very pretty, shimmery smoky eye

Inspiration has struck ✨

"Kaashi?"

"hmm?"

"can I do your makeup?"

"..."

"ok"

Tired Akaashi = he really doesn't care as long as he can relax

He gets up off of you and waits for you to return with yo makeup bag

He mayhaps have dozed off for a bit while you were doing his eyebrows

You were just being very gentle with him and he was so relaxed he just-🥺🥺 sleepy boy

You had to wake him up to do his eyeshadow tho and you felt so bad bc he looked so peaceful

He hated the eyeliner

It felt weird and you poked his eye a few times bc he kept moving

3/10 he doesn't recommend not a fun experience

You on the other hand were loving the look rn tho

He had a shimmery black smoky eye w/ some sliver glitter on the lid, and winged liner

Originally you wanted to do lashes too but decided not to for his safety and comfort

"Akaashi I need you to open your mouth slightly"

".....huh?"

"I'm putting your lipstick on"

"ok"

He's so compliant, he knows how happy this is making you so he just rolls with it

When you finish he opens his eyes and looks at you and you just 😳😳

If you thought he was beautiful before he is absolutely gorgeous now

"can I see?"

" OH... uh yeah sure"

You give him a hand held mirror and....he actually really likes how he looks? Never really thought makeup was for him but.... apparently it is bc wOw his brows look good

Has a big smile when he looks back at you

" I really like it"

" I- you don't hate it? Really?"

" of course not, my eyebrows look cool :))"

Only Akaashi Keiji would describe his perfect eyebrows as "cool"

Kuroo

Ha ha a curious kitty

You had just finished organizing your makeup, you had been putting off going through all of it and getting rid of expired/things you didn't use but you finally did it and now everything is v v clean and organized

Little did you know this curious cat had been watching you the whole time from your bed

Literally didn't even know he was there till he spoke to you

"Could you do my makeup?"

"what? You really want me to put makeup on you?"

"yeah, I'm intrigued by it. I wanna know how it feels"

You just kinda shrug, grab a few products and go to sit in front of him on the bed

Doesn't fidget at all, he stays completely still throughout the entire process

Asks alot of questions tho

"what's this do?"

" That's an eyelash curler"

" It looks like a torture device"

At first you were just gonna put some eyeliner on him and give him a fun lip color, but then you added a bit of pink eyeshadow and some gold graphic liner...and some red liner on his lower lash line

Yeah you kinda went wild

He was snooping around in the lil bag you had your single shadows in when you heard him gasp

" is this heart shaped glitter??!!"

"uuh yeah"

"PUT IT ON ME!!"

He's very excited about the glitter 😌😌

You put it high up on his cheek bones/ under his eyes

By some miracle you were able to get lashes on him

He was very happy with how it turned out

" damn I look really hot"

"wait this isn't fair, how come you're like 10x more sexy now :("

"Some people are just born with it babe"

Deff sends a photo to Bokuto and acts like he's trying to slide into his dms

"Hey there big boy, heard you're good at spiking balls, maybe you could hit some other things for me ;))"

"HDJDBSKSJ!!!"

"WAIT WHY DO YOU ACTUALLY LOOK GOOD?? I DONT LIKE THIS!!!"

";))"

Bokuto

He's the one who asked you

He was really bored and just kinda flopped on your bed, it was one of those stormy days where you couldn't go out

He spotted your makeup bag on top of the dresser

Came up to you in the kitchen holding it like 🥺👉👈

"Can you make me pretty like you?"

"you're already pretty Bo"

"But I want to be as pretty as you.."

"....ok sit down"

"🥰🥰"

Will nOt stop moving, he is vErY fidgety

Opens almost every product you have and smells it

Was very excited to find out liquid lipstick smelt like cupcakes

You let him choose what colors he wanted bc of how excited he seemed

Was that a mistake?....maybe but the way his face lit up looking at all the colors was worth it

"YEs!"

"so you want blue eyeshadow with lime green eyeliner and purple lipstick?"

He's just a big puppy let him be 🥺🥺

You had to redo his eyeliner like 3 times bc he kept fidgeting

Liked looking at all the different brushes you had, he also ranked them by their softness level

Picked up one of your blending brushes and booped you on the nose with it

Explaining fake lashes to him is so difficult, he looks at you like you're explaining rocket science

"you just add a bit of glue on here, and then put the lash on your eye. They just make your lashes look really long and full"

"......eye wigs"

"I- no"

He was very excited when you finished

Immediately took on the persona of a rich lady

Was using one of the tote bags you use to carry your groceries as a "purse" and grabbed the small bitchy sunglasses you own

He looked really good

"ok ok, Bo thats enough"

"Sorry what? I don't speak poor person"

Sugawara

Sunday afternoon cuddles with Suga are the best

You guys were both lounging curled up together doing your own things

He was reading a book Ennoshita recommend and you were messing around on your phone

You ended up getting bored so you put your phone down to snuggle closer to him

You just kinda watched him read for a bit, admiring his features

He let out a small sigh and put his book down

"What are you thinking about?"

"Just how pretty you are"

"Well I think you're gorgeous"

He's such a sweetheart 🥺

You guys just kinda enjoy the silence for a bit as he pressed light kisses down your jaw

"Would you let me do your makeup?"

"mmm I don't know..."

"....I'll give you kisses"

"...."

"deal 👀"

Tells you not to do anything too crazy, which is fine with you

You opt for the classic cat eye and red lip 😌

He stays still for the most part but makes you take breaks when doing the eyeliner bc it feels funky

He has a habit of humming so he hums lil songs for you while you work 🥺

Had a blAst playing with your beauty blender, it was like a lil stress ball

He looks v v good with highlighter on, he's just got really nice cheek bones

Sorry babe but fake lashes aren't happening, he will physically resist if you attempt to put them on him

He liked the lipstick tho, it felt nice

You took a picture of him before handing him a mirror new phone background

Was kinda meh about wearing makeup but complimented your skills

He loves encouraging you and praising your skills bro

"you're really good at doing makeup y/n"

"well I'd hope so, I've been doing it for a long time"

"....."

"Can I get my kisses now"

"Of course you can baby"

The kisses were worth the wait :))

[zed-36]

@ 18: the questions weren't actually that strict! you could interpret them however you liked :) that said, im curious what you would add to the story? i love reading ur ideas and interpretations of the characters n stuff!

oh no prob, i did enjoy thinking of what i could change without adding anything new (i will talk too much if i dont contain myself) BUT since you have asked...

ill share these ideas as a general change to the series as a whole (WR and Acceleracers- also i will call Acceleracers AC for short if i need to).

There is a lot i feel needs to change- but two major points are lore (and direction of it in the story) and characters.

The lore of the series is all weird due to what changed between WR and AC, but its also too surface level. its for kids, its probably why its not so expansive. but it does leave a lot of confusion to me and while i would have to spend much more time to fully “rebuild” the world, i will give some ideas on what i would see changed.

One, at least making it make sense all the way through. i think Acceleracers had the best ideas but it shouldve been expanded on in WR- WR barely touched on actual Acceleron lore. Overall i would like to see the Accelerons 100% remade from the ground up. i LOVE aliens and alien society but i feel all we know of them is they race. and thats its. and sadly AC wasnt seen through to where we may have seen a bit more. but they need to be redone, with lore also point to exactly why the drones woke up when they did, what their drive is, etc. Why is Gelorum the way she is too, very important lor aside from characters. I wouldnt want the series to become a huge Lore Dump but there are moments where they intended to drop lore and they just. dont really do that, at least not well. Imagining the series with more extensive lore would obviously see it being longer than what it is, which i think makes sense. in the end if i was to properly write out all lore it would be a huge rebuild of 1) the Accelerons as an alien society, in depth 2) the full origins of the Drones/Gelorums (how they ended up where they did, what makes them how they are now and 3) a more cohesive plotting of events that would lead to lore revealed. also developing what “Scrim” and “clyp” were, along with the actual depth of Silencerz and how far back they go has been on my mind a lot. scrim and clyp just vanish from lore but in my headcanon backstory for Gelorum, i mention how those things existed too. if anyone has more specific questions on lore tho i can answer those individually! its just a lot to go over lol.

The characters though, oh god where do i start. not gonna touch on every individual (feel free to ask about someone and how i would rewrite them/change them), but theres a lot i would want to see different.

Theres some good ideas in the series that are just not explored much, or the actions dont feel like they have impacts. And many characters have literally zero backstory to go off of... Everyone needs at least some kinda origin in mind, doesnt have to be said but knowing where they come from is one key detail that i think is nice to drop some times. characters referncing locations, where they went, etc... its little but its good to have. In the WR comics, most of these characters do have origins! but theyre completely forgotten in the movies it seems. it would have been cool it WR tied together some of these ‘really good drivers’ and maybe they were in the same races together or something. there are 35 people and none of them seem to know each other at least not in detail- other than Vert and Alec who are clearly friends. Kurt Wylde was written to have done some “illegal” modifications in a race, what is someone there knew him? what if it brought up tension/suspicions? Things like that, its all part of where they come from and its a shame the movies just dont connect them very well.

I think theres some specific characters i will give examples to ‘rewrtiting’ and most of it is AC focused!

Kurt & Markie..... i love them, really do! but after WR i just did not like where they went. i get it, kinda ironic for Markie to become such an opposite. buuuut it was a bit much to me. first off, i would actually expand on the “crime” and that would 100% change the outcome of the two. the period between WR and AC shouldve gone different and in turn, i think wouldve changed up MM and Teku completely! i want to imagine Kurt is trying to get away from bad habits after WR but, perhaps has a really good deal with someone who had also gotten him into illegal car part business in the past. he is tempted and ropes Markie in with the idea they could do so more secretly but are caught, and while Markie is nervous and young he spills all the beans, but none of that evidence goes to Kurt and he stays silent, managing to get out of it. However instead of Kurt going to Teku and Markie going to MM.... Kurt tries to join Teku in the idea of joining a less rowdy gang, but Vert believes full Kurt let his brother take all the blame- so they dont allow him in. He goes for MM, which takes him easily but this team’s energy really doesnt help him. In turn, Markie leaves jail and Vert is swift to allow Markie into Teku because theyre friends! and it helps keep Markie in a better place, not wanting to get back into bad stuff. The important thing is tho, this switch up wouldnt result in super harcore, asshole Kurt. i feel like instead, he would be in an awkward place of wanting to improve himself but MM’s rebellious attitude coaxes him into worse attitudes. AND... very much an oppurtunity for Gelorum to manipulate him once more, as the accelechargers are much more important to acquire, with multiple, we’d loop back again. in the end though! i could imagine the story would still bring in the same scenario- Markie gets taken by drones, Kurt saves him, they rekindle and Kurt also comes to realize he shouldnt give in to the ways he used to practice.

i think for AC, in order to find more interest in the characters,  a switch up with the teams would be neat. Markie and Kur swapping was always on my mind, but i have thought about Teku!Taro. I think it would’ve been cool to throw in an background guy from WR into MM... like Harrison Lau. some more familiar faces would bring interesting dyanmics considering their backgrounds. and it think it wouldve fleshed out the teams a bit more in places they lacked.

Another thing i think is clear is there is lots of unexplored potential. Like dyanmics i express with Markie, characters like Lani, Karma, Tork, etc... oh there is so much i would add for them. Karma has a weird thing with being mentioned to look like Gelorum, and her prefectionism too but it was never touched on. What if it caused conflict? What if it made her question their morals? Or with Tork- i would honestly just rewrite how he tackles Tone’s death and the resolution, that whole thing in movie was weird and messy and made no sense to me imo. Lanu had something going for her but she felt so disconnected from the WR characters in AC, which is a shame! oh there are so many to go over lol. i hope to tackle some of these loose ends in the fics i have in mind but yeah... there is so much to say about changing these characters!!

[ramudamemura]

ranking fling posses songs even tho nobody asked

i havent looked at translations for the lyrics so this based off of only the melody also I hope I don’t offend anyone for not liking certain songs as much I’m really really really sorry if i do

Umm I’m doing them in alphabetical order btw

3$EVEN—

ok so I really like this song it’s super super catchy but. But 😭 it has like those cash register sounds in the background and I mean it doesn’t ruin the song or anything but like it sounds like they’re trying to hard JDJDJDJJS I would not listen to this song in front of friends just because of the sound effects BUT like I said it’s really catchy so it kinda makes up for it!! My favorite part is when there’s the instrumental part that leads into a key change!! I rate this an 8.5/10

BATTLE BATTLE BATTLE—

i like this one a lot too! One thing that’s kinda cool is how they go back and forth on the chorus like matenrou is first I think and then fling posse and the way they’re going back and forth almost makes it seem like they’re really fighting yknow!!! Ummm also it has like Moments where like idk they’re memorable like when doppo screams or Gentaro does the whispery thing and I like that!! This ones also 8.5/10

Black Journey—

dont get me wrong I do like this one but it’s probably in my bottom three 😭 I don’t actually dislike it THAT much it’s just that I really like all the other songs ig? There’s really only one song I dislike but we’ll talk about that later anyways this song is pretty nice I’m not good at recognizing voices but whoever is singing in the very very beginning (Gentaro???) did a very good job I’m gonna give this a 6.5/10

Calyx—

a lot of what I’m gonna say here goes for both of gentaros songs but they both sound almost unfinished? That’s not really what I mean idk how to describe it they both sound like they’re missing something?? theyre both extremely catchy and really well written which kinda makes up for it but it’s still kinda noticeable yknow? BUT im not saying this song isn’t good like it’s really good but it COULD be better I think but um for some reason the chorus makes me nostalgic?? I have no idea what for but yeah. Hmm 8/10

Drops—

Im insane for liking this song so much it’s so obnoxiously upbeat and I swear I should hate it but I DONT because like yeah it’s obnoxious but it’s catchy and I can never be sad or angry while listening to it cuz it cheers me up. im embarrassed to like this song as much as I do 😭 but like. IDK it’s got a really good tune and it gets stuck in your head and it’s super cute umm I’m giving this one a 9/10

JACKPOT!—

I feel like everyone really really likes this song but idk I don’t think it’s that great again I don’t DISLIKE it but I’d say it’s my second least favorite fling posse song? Umm what’s something good I can say about it well it has a nice beat I do like the beat a lot idk I’m just gonna give it a 5/10

pink colored love—

okkkk I’m trying not to be mean but like I HATE this song so much 😭 I’m trying to think of something nice to say about it but I genuinely cannot think of a single part I like im giving it a 1/10 because I feel bad giving it a 0

reason to FIGHT—

love this one!!! It’s very like energetic and pretty fast paced and I really like the chorus which duh is important cuz it gets repeated a lot umm my favorite part is when they like announce the group names??? I don’t speak Japanese but ik they say mad trigger crew and fling posse and Id try to find the lyrics but again I can’t understand Japanese and ik they say the group names several times and I don’t want to put the wrong part 😭 but yeah I like that umm idk it’s just a really good song 10/10

scenario liar—

just like with Gentaro’s other song this one sounds a bit unfinished and I don’t like it quite as much as his other one but it’s still really really catchy his voice sounds very smooth and nice here!!! Also it has this one like piano bit in the background that I like :)) I really like the chorus but the reason why I like this one less than the other is because the rest (outside of the chorus) is a tiny bit boring but still I’ll give it 7.5/10

SCRAMBLE GAMBLE—

im also embarrassed to like this one as much as I do but this might be one of my favorites 😭 no idea why but I really like it my favorite part is the right to left left to right part there’s more lyrics than that but that’s all i can remember AND it doesn’t have cash register noises so it’s a step up from dices other song I really really like it 10/10

SHIBUYA GHOST NIGHT—

Maybe it’s just me but I feel like this one doesn’t seem to be as popular but for whatever reason I’m like obsessed with it 😭 I really like Halloween and in theory this could be considered kind of a Halloween song??? Not really but like ghosts and stuff idk and it always gets stuck in my head I really like it 9.5/10

SHIBUYA MARBLE TEXTURE—

this ones cute the beginning sounds like .idk how to describe it like bouncy??? It’s very bouncy???? I like how they say the name of who’s rapping before they start that’s nice and I like the kind of call and response part thats a little towards the end idk I don’t have much to say 8/10

SHIBUYA MARBLE TEXTURE remix—

I like the original a tiny bit better than the remix but this ones nice too! It doesn’t have as much of the like bounciness but it still sounds good. The background part when each person like individually raps makes me really nostalgic for some reason? My only complaint is I don’t really like the siren noises they always take me by surprise even tho I know they’re coming 8/10

stella—

this is the only one I’ve looked at lyric translations for and the song itself AND the lyrics are both really nice. I love the piano part a lot it’s really nice and there’s this really specific line in dices part that I really like when it has the like descending violin thing which gets me EVERY TIME 😭 also towards the end I think it’s the last time they sing the chorus there’s like a drum roll added in (sounds like snare????) and I’m obsessed with it and also again towards the end they add like more background instruments to like flesh out the sound (?) and I really like that 10/10

[lunar-bird]

okay when i made this blog i was never gonna talk in depth about personal details but it's my personal blog and i need to fuckin vent

tw suicide mention , vague reference to sy//sc//ou//rse the suicide bit is mentioned (past tense, vague) but not a present risk, if this shows up in that second tag i'm gonna lose my goddamn mind, so help me. don't bring it to this post i do not care. i warn about it because i hate it.

so i was never Going to share this information, but it's context. im a system member of... questionable origins. there was some element of "imaginary friend becomes real" in the story of my life, but we've also been realizing that i just happened to pop in at, inarguably, the most traumatic point in our life, so it's just. whatever.

i don't CARE, except that we've been discussing finding a new therapist and also how, exactly, we're supposed to talk about me. we don't have a diagnosis because our previous one supported us in our "actually this is not causing me distress so i don't want it pathologized" mindset (and we still don't necessarily want to pursue one, for various personal reasons) but if we're gonna get a therapist im gonna fuckin talk to them as myself because i have problems that need solving, too. so it's been something to think about. don't know the chances of finding someone who's gonna be cool about it, never tried. it's stressing me out.

i spent half my fucking life being told "you exist whether or not people believe you're real and regardless of where you came from" and the other half being told "you can't be real because you don't fit x y or z criteria" and i'm so. done with it. i don't care anymore WHY or HOW i exist because, unfortunately, i do!! trust me, we've tried to just believe me out of existence, tried to just be like "okay, i've served my purpose, i can fuck off" but i'm stuck here! would give literally anything to get out of this head and be a Real Boy but here we are. this blog was originally a chance to let me try: just one space where i'm me and only me and implied to actually exist outside of my stupid head.

nothing against max, he's my best fucking friend, but i don't know if we would even like each other if i wasn't stuck with him. i mean, we would -- it's not to say that we don't genuinely care about each other -- but i just don't think we would have ever met. and i think i'm too much like people he hates now anyway, cause i went and absorbed their traits while we were still friends with them. i don't know. i'm mad that i don't get the chance to find out, though. i'm not kidding when i say i'd give anything i have to exist separately, but instead i'm stuck here and i have to make do with just... sometimes interacting with people who are friends with him first and me because they're trustworthy enough to know about me.

i can't go out and meet new people, i don't get to decide what kind of people i would be friends with if i had the chance, i don't get to decide what kind of community i would build on my own. i don't want to spend my whole life this closely connected to anyone. i want some form of independence. instead i spend my whole life thinking "if someone knows the truth of me, will they automatically dismiss me as fake or fucked up?" really gets in the way of my personal relationships.

thus, therapist.

i'm also terrified that whoever we talk to is going to suck. i'm obviously going to try to present the facts of my life as truthfully as possible, but i'm afraid that anyone with experience in these things is going to try to diagnose me with something i don't want to be diagnosed with. or that i'll be dismissed as a symptom of max's psychosis, regardless of the fact that i exist even when max is medicated and doing well. or that max's life will be prioritized over mine, even if i get the courage to speak for myself and we're both willing to make changes so that i can actually live. it takes a lot to actually be honest with what my life is and how i feel about it, and the risk that i'll be told im a problem to be medicated against.

i know max is lookin out for the same things i am, and i know he actually cares and wants to help me actually enjoy my life. we both know i'm here to stay, and not just because max still needs someone to talk him into living. we're about as healthy as we've ever been, plus or minus a few symptoms, and quarantine has given me a lot of time to think and i know we both want to actually make my life worthwhile for me if i'm stuck with it. it's just a matter of. how. we need outside advice for that.

i've tried to get my own hobbies, i've tried to make my own spaces on the internet where only i exist, i've tried to make my own friends, but i'm just shit at it. i don't know where to start. i have interests that max does not have, but generally if we do things we do them together. our shared interests are great! lately we've been reading together, and sometimes we watch movies! i just wish i also got to do things on my own. people weren't made to be with other people 100% of the time. now neither of us gets to be alone in our heads for even a second. max has a paranoia that he's constantly being watched and judged and i don't exactly help, considering i see everything he ever does. i want literally nothing in the world more than to be alone sometimes, but, (gestures at all of me). i figure if a professional can't help, nobody can.

here at the end i just want to add a disclaimer that like... i don't hate my life. i care very deeply for all the friends i do have, and especially the ones who interact with me intentionally. i had one person the other day ask max specifically about how i was doing, without just assuming that i'm always watching in the background and where it wasn't even necessary that i be mentioned, and i've never appreciated anything more than the implication that i exist to other people when i'm not there. i just want a chance to make all of the stuff i'm stuck with actually work for me, in a way that makes me happy i exist.

i dont know how to do it, and i started out frustrated about it but now i'm just tired. i would like help. we just have to find someone who i can trust and who i'm not afraid of and maybe i can finally make some goddamn progress for once.

[miserybegins]

hey mack! you dont have to respond to this if its too personal or weird of a question but i was just curious how you work with budgeting/time off/and traveling when following franks tours and tours like it because i wanna do it SO BAD

its not too personal but..i dont have a very good answer for it. this could get long (even though i said i dont have a good answer...smh...i just feel like i need to lay out the background info) so im gonna put it under a cut

so i avoid talking about my home life because im embarassed. i still live at home and i dont pay most of my bills. this is largely because i am severely mentally ill and only this year (july) found a medication that helps to stop the constant racing suicidal thoughts. and when you’re literally constantly thinking about killing yourself and that you wont be around much longer (even if you dont act on it) its hard to...move forward in life.

so i have a college degree and i had an internship my senior year with a company that loved me and wanted me to work there and then when i applied i didnt get the job and i basically gave up (part of my bpd) because the rejection was so hard to handle and i felt like it was my only option.

i ended up getting a job at a food place where i worked pretty much full time and became a manager and the money wasnt enough to like move out or pay my bills but it was enough and my parents werent getting on me about it too much at that time cause i had just graduated and i didnt know what i was ready for and to be honest my mom especially has babied me and done everything for me my entire life so like....a LOT of things are especially hard for me and i love and appreciate all that shes done but i wish she had let me fend for myself more cause now im 25 and feel useless ANYWAY

the jobs ive had in the past 2.5 years have mostly made it possible for me to follow tours, they allowed time off and i made enough so that i could save for tickets and stuff like that. however, many times my christmas and birthday presents have been flights or tickets, because they know generally how hard of a time im having all the time and that it means so much to me. theyve definitely enabled me with the whole thing.

nowadays i make basically no money at hot topic cause they give me literally 6 hours a week which i think is bullshit but...idk what else im going to do rn. i started working at hot topic after i spent a month in the hospital in july following a suicide attempt. no one expected me to get a new job right away but i took a leap of faith and applied there and got the job AND starting taking a class at a community college about a month after i was out.

and now i like have a plan. im not using my original degree cause im not passionate about it but im in the process of applying for a surgical tech program which my parents will support me through and then when i graduate ill be able to get a job that pays enough for me to get my own place and pay my own bills and stuff. i am working towards it! you probably didnt need to know all of this but i sometimes feel like im not telling the whole truth when people ask me about how i do tours and stuff

anyway, that all being said, the best thing to do is to just save all of your extra money, all the time. it’s ok to let yourself buy things once in a while but i personally have a habit of spending a lot of money on food that i dont need to as well as other stuff. if you only pay for the things that are necessary and save the rest, depending on your job, it can add up quickly and make it easier for you to do more shows and travel. it just depends on if its a priority for you. shows are my happy place and my priority so its easy for me to say im not gonna go do such and such thing when that could be money for a ticket.

if anyone actually read this whole thing im sorry..

[dulharpa]

this is for hayley! @whistlingwillows a dear friend <3333

it’s meant to be a birthday present haha. i just want to shower you in love;;; so thought maybe i could go through as many of your fics and comment on them :^)))

(TO EVERYONE ELSE: please go to @whistlingwillows blog and read her fics!!! they are SO FCKIN GOOD AND AMAZING AND UGH HER MIND (it’s a lot of mcu and her bucky and steve fics are a*. i DEFINITELY RECOMMEND))

i wish you a VERY happy birthday and i hope we stay friends for many more years <3333333333 

i’m going through your masterlist heehee ;)))

ah first off, nice theme! i never could rlly see it before because i’m always on mobile heehee. also sorry for not reviewing them before??? i don’t usually read fics on tumblr as you’ve probably guessed;;

anyways, IM GON REVIEW THE SHIT OUT OF THESE >:DDDD

far from home -  bucky x stark sister!reader

firstly, i like how youre introducing the reader from buckys pov, like you can sort of already gather what shes like from them

‘Bucky can hear Tony’s soft inhale, feel the intensity of the man’s glare directed at Steve. He shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but a twitch of muscle would be enough to alert both men that he’s here. With the amount of tension crackling in the air, a brush against the wall would be equivalent to a thousand cymbals crashing in cacophony.’

IM CRYING ALREADY. the imagery in here is GLORIOUS. your tone here is so fitting! oo and the alliteration here is perfecto

ooooooo!! the backstory coming in  👀👀

‘despite what some people think that Steve and Captain America are two different personas, there will always be parts of Steve in the Avenger, and parts of the Avenger in Steve. They both want to believe in something good. They are, after all, one in the same.// Just as how Bucky and the Winter Soldier are the same man despite everything. HYDRA simply amplified the hate, fertilized the seeds of rage, curated the quiet thunder within his soul, within James Buchanan Barnes so that the Winter Soldier could thrive.’

yIKES! lol this is very character study like! nICE. it hurts tho, my poor children, i love you both 

oo ‘starlight eyes’ that is a very nice way of describing them

‘“Then what was London?” The protesters. “São Paulo?” The earthquake. “Vancouver?” Freezing cold water.//“Look, I care if Stark’s gonna run us over trying to find her. I care enough because she’s part of our team. Come off it, Steve. I know she can take care of herself. I’m gonna take a nap. Dr. Cho said no partying post-Singapore and what do you know, we throw the biggest party ever.’

ooo singapore uwu and london? (coincidence? haha jkjk) and the hints abt reader and buckys background are so good?? but so annoying??? like i just wanna KNOW yknow?? 

‘The water runs copper and the sting bites at his palm as he tries not to think. Tries to focus on the numbing cold that runs over his skin.’ 

your imagery is so vivid?? im actually in awe??? i am so regretful i havent kept reading your fics. like i know they are amazing, i just keep putting them off??? idk man. hopefully this makes up for it (gd tho, im still not done with commenting on one fic. this is what im doing with my motivation teehee ;)

‘ He feels weak. Tired. He wants to go back to bed but he also wants to stay out in the sun for a few hours more. The sun kisses his skin through the windows and he squints against the blue sky, wondering ‘

mood during this quarantine lol

‘“Oh, right.” Your voice is flat, uninterested, cold, as you stare at him. “You killed my parents.”Shit.‘

 OUCH LMAO THATS C O L D, O GOT +100 PHYSIC DAMAGE FROM JUST READING THAT

ooo robin as a nickname noice. very much gives me batman vibes lol

oh! and the way of doing the ‘flashback’ is neat! very original. it both tells us what happened AND buckys reaction to it again. he can re-analyse himself and reader. very cool

‘If you walk away now, don’t bother coming back!” Silence. Bucky can hear his own strained breathing, your soft sigh as you soaked in his ultimatum.’

👀👀 yikes that ultimatum. :// not good bucky. tbf theyre both trying to hurt each other but Yikes

eyy!!! readers pov!! finally! and the switch after we find out the outsiders pov? brilliant

oh no :(( more angst

‘When’s the last time you saw your therapist?”“Don’t have one. I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”’ they BOTH need therapists;;;;

very good fic!!! :DD they rlly do hate each other! i definitely like how you went back and forth with the timeline! it gave me a v strong idea on what yn was like even before we rlly got introduced. i am now very curious on where reader is? i love your characterisations! 

i will read the 10k+ fics but heck the last one took me ages lolol (i will comment in the future tho!! i promise <3 ) (that took me over an hour jjhghgdjh)

slipping away- amnesiac modern bucky x reader

omg,,, AMNESIA! >:DDDDDD

‘ Put your fucking seatbelt on’

oh no, istg theyre going to have a car crash arent they (’ doesn’t put the seatbelt on to spite you.’ NO PLEASE PUT IT ON U DUMBASS)

ok,,,,, at LEAST he put it on before he got hit, thank heck. but still. youre so cruel to your poor characters lmaoo

oh gosh

‘You fall apart slowly, like pieces of you peeling away until you’re nothing more than your broken heart. The sobs that wrack your body are relentless and you shove your forearm into your mouth to muffle your cries. You want to bite into your skin. You want to distract yourself from the agony tearing you to shreds. You want to feel anything but the pain.///Tears sweep into your hair, cloud your vision and your whole face floods with heat as you try to breathe through the pain. You’re cleaved into pieces on that bed, eyes squeezed shut as the tears keep flowing, and your throat burns’

this hurts damn, it is so vivid?? i can really feel it 

i am so glad you got into writing yk?? so glad

NO PLS, TELL HIM. TELL HIM :((( ‘shes nice once you get to know her?? shes known nat for years now!! years!!

oh god ‘he looks younger without the burden of your time together’ this is so angsty omg

‘Well, he was stumbling through his apology and I just let him finish.” Your body fills with warmth as you remember his embarrassed smile, the way he shoved his baseball cap farther down his head, chin tucked to his chest, trying to hide that face. “When he was done, I opened my mouth to say something polite but what came out was ‘You look like someone I’d very much like to kiss’.”

this is so soft i stg im crying in the club

OH SHITTTTTTTTTTT , you left it off like that!!! thats so cruel!!!! i can’t!!! how dare you!!!! :””””””((( im typing this with tears in my eyes ill have u know!!

anyway!!! very good fic!! you could honestly make that into a longfic very easily lol. i felt too many emotions :(( 

i was just about to say where is the fluff!! where is it!! when i saw the next one and yay :))) pls i cant have more angsty stuff rn

.

cookies and rings and things bucky and reader

‘how much do you love me?’ ‘count the snowflakes, multiply by a million’

did you have to start the fic off with such a SOFT line? its so soft! so TENDER 

‘He wonders what kinda insane person wears socks without any clothes on, but then decides that it’s the kind of person who’s fallen in love with him.’  jesus, the soft moments filled with love are the greatest <3

you can write fluff so well, whyd you have to pain me with all that angst ;””””) (1/10 hurt, 9/10 comfort is the way to go lolol) (jkjk ill read the angsty ones too when i have the spoons) (gonna reread that hydra steve one and ik thatll fuck me UP)

‘ Then, he can feel the cold metal of the ring she slid onto her own finger less than twenty-four hours ago and realizes that he had thought a lot of things shouldn’t be possible, and yet they still are. ‘

you literally brought me to tears reading this softness, you have truly found my weakness

‘ She’s so damn gorgeous with flour on her face and eye bags beneath her eyes that he’s sure she will inevitably make his heart burst ‘

he already likes her so much! i can’t believe this is affecting me so much :’)

‘Bucky is quite sure Sam is in love with his girlfriend in the fact that he’s in love with the fact that his girlfriend is possibly in love with Bucky’

this is so soft??? sam loves reader bc reader loves bucky sm. pls my hear <3333

you do fluff SO WELL DAMN 

‘F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice echoes in his small little perch and he still thinks it’s weird without having the side effect of Stark in his suit chasing after him to hear the A.I. but he shoves that uncomfortable feeling of the dead man out of his head. That is too much regret to unpack right now on a mission. ‘

yike bringing back that reminder oof

but thats so soft??? (i am def overusing soft but,,,,, i love it and the vibe) she sent him cookies! god i can feel the love  

‘She expresses her feelings through cooking, which Bucky has learnt the hard way. One time, they got into an argument over something stupid—he can’t even remember what started it—and came to the kitchen at 2AM to see her sitting at the kitchen island crying her eyes out and surrounded by baskets of muffins.’

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 my hEART

you show how much they love each other in so many ways??? i am dying

“Alright, I like it.” Rolling his eyes, he pecks her forehead and she smiles victoriously. It’s so adorable that Bucky, with less than three hours of sleep, adds, “God, I want to marry you.//”“What?”//Oh.Shit.

oh my god! i am literally tearing up!!! AGAIN!!!!!!!!

oh shit o am literally crying

your fluff got me crying harder than your angst i hope youre happy

I really hope you enjoy reading this?? i keep forgetting to like text you but i wanted to do something for your birthday. especially in quarantine when everythings gone crazy. one year i swear ill do something REALLY good for you. not making promises bc i hate if i dont. but ill like, learn how to podfic because you D E S E R V E  I T 

ive spent like three hours doing this lolol 

thank you so much for everything hayley!

[bigskydreaming]

fhalkfhaklfhlkak i hate this

TW really truly literally ruined the word ‘spark’ for me. Like the whole damn word. I hear it now and I’m like, NOPE, like...idk, some people who cringe when they hear the word moist or panties. Apologies to anyone who hates those words and cringed, i dont actually know if thats a thing or if like, I just have weird friends. Probably just the latter.

But anyways, Im just like...lmfao. Its so visceral too? Like I have this one original project, Waveriders, that I’ve been fiddling with off and on in the background of other projects for awhile, might have talked about it on here, idk, I don’t keep track. 

Basically its a far future sci-fi novel/setting for linked shorter works set on a gas giant that was settled by humans who figured that they can’t possibly be stepping on anyone’s toes there, its a freaking gas giant, hello, no one’s home, right? They literally have to make their own ground by using technology to form anti-gravity wells in the habitable zone of the atmosphere and like, make floating cities and then these kind of buoys scattered across the planet that create these electromagnetic currents that flow in specific ‘routes’ between the cities, and people travel between them in these flying ships that use magnetized hulls and solar sails to ride these currents, and blah blah blah, yada yada yada, bc like, why would I resist an opportunity to have floating cities and sky pirates and ancient cyborg machine dragons? Doesn’t make sense. 

Anyway, so couple thousand years after settling this planet, and by then for Plotty Reasons there are people who have what’s called waveriding abilities, like they can ‘hack’ certain wavelengths or types of energy and manipulate them in various ways, but only one kind of energy per person, and they each have their own little names and niches. 

So, y’know, basically just like ATLA, except for like, its energy powers and there are cyborg machine dragons and floating cities and sky pirates, obvsly. Plus areas of totally fucked up gravity called the badlands that are all like, criminal underworld metropolis because normal people are like lol nope, we like it when up is up and down is down, all of this is very just...nope. And also because shocking and totally unexpected plot twist, they were totally wrong about the planet being uninhabited just cuz it didn’t have Earth type ground...like, so in addition and on top of and in conjunction with all of the above and whatnot, there are these beings called Chaos Angels, that are basically like sentient quantum waveforms that can take any shape or appearance, but just, have no physical substance and yet are really good at faking that they’re not totally there when they fuck with humans, which they do a lot, because well. Why not, y’know?

But other than that, its exactly like ATLA. I’m a derivative hack. I disgust myself, truly I do.

BUT the point of this particular synaptic misfire aka ADHD ramble, is that so, okay, these different types of not!benders are all called waveriders as an overall umbrella term, but with ten different subsets of this in total, right? So people who can ‘hack’ light and manipulate it in various ways are called brightriders, and people who are tuned into soundwaves are called echo-riders, and some can manipulate the more electricity-skewed side of the electromagnetic spectrum and those are shockriders and the ones who skew more to the magnetic side are steelriders but I’m probably gonna change that because it sounds like a porno? Yeah no, just saw it outside of my notes for the first time and can confirm, definitely sounds like a porno so they’re not gonna be called steel-riders, but they will be called something steel-rider-esque. You get it.

And then there are the five weird ones that people aren’t totally quite sure how their waveriding shticks work because the kinds of energy they hack aren’t like....the kinds that work in the same way as the others with their easily discernible and patternistic wavelengths, and scientists and scholars are always arguing like but skyriders aren’t even in the same FIELD as the other waverider types because gravity isn’t even an actual ENERGY, just because we talk about gravity waves doesn’t mean they’re remotely the same thing as lightwaves, they make no SENSE, and I’m just like hahaha, I am your god, fictional scientists. Fucking deal with it. Plus it does make sense, you just don’t know the Secret Rules and Logistics that I do, pfft. 

Anyway, so the other types are boomriders who hack kinetic energy and skyriders of course obviously manipulate gravity, and then the last three are really weird, and super rare and thus don’t really have set names and just have lots of nicknames and are often just thought to be rumors. So those are the bio-riders who manipulate chemical energy though it often gets mistakenly referred to or just handwaved as being ‘life energy’ as though that’s a thing, ugh future way advanced people are so dumb sometimes, honestly. But so they can manipulate biological processes in various ways and do things with healing and also hurting, and basically just don’t piss one off ever. Like. You’ll die. And then there’s the psi-riders, who are essentially psychics and hack brainwaves, and I’m not at all bitter that I lack the balls to just go for broke and call them ghost riders like I want to, because ghost riders obviously sounds way cooler?? But also, Marvel would definitely sue?? Because they’re just, like that. 

And like, the last of the Weird Ones are the ones so super rare and also so hard to actually....tell if someone actually IS one, that most people think they don’t actually even exist and are just an unsubstantiated like, theoretical idea some scientist had once while high and then just, never shut up about so eventually the idea caught on. And those are the quantum-riders, or luck-riders, basically they theoretically manipulate quantum wavelengths in ways that are almost impossible to identify, like theoretically they wouldn’t even know they were doing it? Anyway, so lots of times, what are actually quantum-riders are just jealously thought to be like, really fucking lucky assholes. Even though the way their powers work really don’t have anything to do with luck or even probability, specifically, like that’s a simplistic approximation and its more like they manipulate possibilities but also shut up me, nobody cares.

ANYWAY, people who can count and who actually bothered to would probably notice by now like the funky little geniuses they are that all of those still only adds up to nine. And that’s because of the last one, the one that SHOULD go up in the brightrider, shockrider, notpornIswear!steel-rider hierarchy or taxidermy or whatever the fuck. And these are the ones who manipulate what’s essentially thermal energy, or more accurately the microwave-skewing side of the ultraviolet spectrum whereas brightriders are just the ones who skew more to the infrared side of it.

And the long and short of all of this Unnecessary-ness and the source of my fit of pique and ensuing ramble-palooza....is that ORIGINALLY, they were SUPPOSED to be called sparkriders.

But OBVIOUSLY I can’t call them that anymore, because like. I tried, and I was like ugh you drama queen slash whiny pissbaby, it was just a shitty teen supernatural show and SPARK WAS NEVER EVEN CANON, do not let THEM win and ruin a perfectly good classification name! But I did. I did let it ruin them, and its. Well. Its a problem, because I kept thinking up ways to kill off the sparkrider characters for absolutely no reason at all instead of like....thinking up ways to make the plot do what it was outlined to do in their parts of the story.

This may come like, way out of left field, and just SHOCK and STUN and BEWILDER some of you, like....no way, srsly? But yeah, true story, among my many canon mental neuroses like ADHD, PTSD, magical depression hour and super fun anxiety like....there is a tiny possibility (aka actual diagnosis) that while I don’t talk about this much, or ever really, I do have a smidge of ye old OCD? Its not like, a big thing and doesn’t really affect my daily routines and that’s pretty much why I never usually bring it up or list it alongside the rest of the crap on my neurodivergence resumé or whatever, because like, there’s already WAY too many misconceptions out there about what OCD actually is and what constitutes it, and tons of people are always jokingly but also thinking they’re kinda half serious, like ‘oh I’m so OCD about this and this and that’ and its like. LOL. Are you though? You sure?

Anyway, but point being, the way mine manifests for me is like...not actually a problem? Like, I don’t actually have any REAL complaints about it at all, just half-assed little fits of pique ones like this, which is the other part of why I never bring it up, because too often ppl just can’t fathom that OCD or even any kind of neurodivergence can be...WANTED, or a good thing, and lololol, that’s ableism, folks. But its true, I don’t actually mind mine at all, even if it occasionally makes things frustrating, when I get stuck like I am now. But the flip side of it is....its actually a pretty huge part of my creativity and just the way my mind works in general....like, what people accredit to me being particularly insightful about character analysis or drawing connections or stuff like that in meta or fics or my novels or worldbuilding...that’s what it is. That’s my OCD in action. 

My brain like...REQUIRES that I find patterns in....pretty much everything. Even day to day mundane stuff too, though like I said, its mild enough there that it doesn’t fuck with my routines too much, but like, I have to order things into nice, neat patterns and groupings. And if there aren’t any that are immediately obvious, I kinda pretty much HAVE to dig deeper until I find some on a slightly deeper level, something beneath the surface or first glance, and keep going until I find something.....or worst case scenario, I have to like....add stuff and embellish and fill in gaps with my own ‘content’ until I have the rough edges rounded off into something that CAN be stacked neatly atop some other part of the story or whatever it is I’m focusing on? And the obsessive-compulsive part for me is like, lol, I gotta find it SOMEWHERE, SOMEHOW. 

My brain literally won’t shut off or grudgingly accept being diverted to a different subject until I’ve made some kind of pattern or flowchart or classification system. It will literally keep me up for hours, going over the same things over and over from every angle until I find SOME way to....reassemble or restructure it in some nice, neat little order of some type. I mean that’s basically what it is. My brain insists on me forming some semblance of order out of any glimpse I have of what I would otherwise term creative chaos. And it won’t give up until it gets what it wants, which when you throw in my ADHD and how often I’ll get derailed off on slight tangents but with my OCD then sooner or later forcing me back to the original focus, rinse and repeat ad nauseam....like. LOL. I learned to operate on very little sleep from a pretty young age by necessity, its just...my brain, dudes. Its just like that.

But the perks are like, I pretty much think this is WHY I’m so creative....because my brain, for as long as I can remember, has always just kinda....forced me to be? Also probably has a lot to do with well...eh, I don’t need to talk about that right now. Whatever. Anyway, point being, so....I do like the end results very much so, and for all its....Why Must You Be Like This eccentricities, I’m quite attached to my brain and would not be very likely to agree to a trade even were one possible. I mean don’t get me wrong, I could do without the PTSD and anxiety, if we’re just, like....talking some pruning shears or whatever, but the actual creative machinery, I’m keeping. Ultimately it just means I really fucking like patterns and finding patterns or making patterns where previously there were none, or at least none that were easy to spot.

But ugh, man, these are the rare times when I’m like omg, just call it a day, we don’t ACTUALLY have to come up with the perfect replacement name for that one relatively small and insignificant detail of a much larger story that isn’t even in the Top Ten list of my main priorities at the moment. And my asshole of a brain is just like....yeah no, we gotta. You know the rules dude, you decided it was official, that name didn’t work anymore and was never gonna, so now we gotta find a replacement or else things will be UNEVEN?? The pattern will be...missing a piece? There will be CHAOS AND ANARCHY IN THE STREETS THAT RUNNETH OVER WITH BLOOD? IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT??

And so I’m like....literally sitting here googling synonyms for spark because I’m just like that sometimes, lmfao. Oh and of course its gotta be a GOOD replacement, naturally. I can’t just shoehorn in a somewhat acceptable substitute that in the back of my mind I’m expecting to only be temporary, until I come up with something better. See, because my brain will KNOW, and it will NOT be okay with that, because that is CHEATING. And my brain, apparently, has strong feelings about cheating, which is weird and fairly unexpected of me, IMO.

Anyway, kudos to anyone who actually read through that instead of scrolling, I honestly have zero idea why I felt like sharing it, I just did and thus I did. *shrugs* 

[kururrugi]

Manga-Colouring Tutorial

hello guys!! since a few people requested me to make a tutorial on how i colour mangacaps on photoshop cs6, here is a quick post on it! i hope i dont sound confusing lmao and it helps you guys! [ note: pls note that i am very new to colouring mangacaps and it could also be that i follow wrong instructions! this post will only include the way i colour them on photoshop not on sai, it may be full of mistakes as well since i am no pro at this. i hope you guys understand.]

so then, here i will show a quick colouring if deku! <3

since this is gonna be pretty long, i will keep this under a cut!

hmm so first of all, we will need these following things for colouring (lmao i k now you guys already know these but oh well):

photoshop cs6 (i just use these version but of course it will work on any other version as well)

default brushes mostly, but i also love to use these ones

basic knowledge in photoshop

just a little patince (which i dont have so this tutorial is probably gonna suck)

you can also play a music for better concentrating!

so so here are the steps:

cleaning of the cap

basic colouring

adding shades and brightness

that’s all

so now we actually start 1. cleaning of the cap

this is how the original mangacap looked like, you need to first erase the unnecessary lines, quotations using basic eraser tool

this is how ot should look after cleaning the other lines, and if you think the cap still looks dark or unclean then just add more brightness and adjust the levels slightly. as this above cap already looks pretty clean, you dont need to do this step for these kind of caps.

yeah cleaning part is pretty short. lets move to next step! *O*

2.basic colouring

so the colouring part starts now. first we will do basic colours!!

create another layer under the cap and fill it white. then set normal > multiply for the cap layer

then we start colouring!!

first comes basics!!! so as we will colour the skin as following, it will look like this!

following the same steps, we will also basic colour hair, uniform and tie!!

it will look like this!! make sure to put everything in different groups and layers for ease at colouring in next step! like this:

okay, so this completes our 2nd step as well!! ayyy i hope i could amke everything clear this far!! now comes the hardest part *sweats*

3.adding shades and brightness

ahem so here we go! in this step, we will add brightness and shadings for more realistic colouring! good luck with this step!! we will start first with skin

here is my colour palate for skin colours

first comes shading! for shading skin, i use this brush

okay so we will create another layer over the skin one and creat clipping mask over it like this

after you do this, the cap looks like this

you cant tell if there is actually any shading or not at all right?? yes i know! thats why we will add more shades

tbh, i tend to not add much shades in my colourings, so feel free to add more, however you please!

and then now we will add some brightness

added some light! the method is same, just create a new layer, add “create clipping mask”

yup its easy right!! but now dont forget to add some blush too cuz deku is a cute pure cinnamon roll it will look better! but of course its not necessary! 

thats how he will look with some blush and some light too! for the red in the blush i use this brush

you will find it in the brush link i added above! ^^ and add the white thing with the default brush!

i use the same method for adding shade in hair just like i did for skin!

so for shading in hair i use this brush:

then add some lights as well!!

i used the same steps

a bit late, but here is my palate for hair color

well, just like this you do the tie and the badge as well!

hmm so it should look something like this

so we are nearly done! 

[note: some people like to draw outlines as well, welp, i am too lazy to do that but i will tell you how to do that!]

so, if you want to add outlines, like i did in this one, you will need to amke a new layer over the original mangacap and draw the outlines with default brush, and then when you are done, delete the layer of original cap ^^ 

tbh there is another easy way to make the outlines in the original cap look better,

i make the black outlines a little brownish by this and it looks slightly better! however for best results, i will advise to draw outlines by yourself! takes a lot of time but also makes it a lot better!

dont forget, we still have eyes left!! xD

i am terrible at colouring eyes, but first make this 

color the base color! then draw a outline and also draw the pupil black!

now we will need shades and lights so we will add them following the same rule as before!

[note: keep note of where the source of the light must be coming from and color the shades and reflection according to them!]

so at last, it will look something like this! add background

add TA-DAH! it finished!! 

i am saying this again xD it was probably confusing, i am not the best at explaining stuffs ;_; but i hope this was able to help you a bit and you enjoyed! have a great day y’all!! <3333

[j-t-k-moved]

I've finally done it. I've finished my Trollsona. Me as a Troll. This took much more effort than I thought it would be tbh. Anyway this is gonna be a long post tbh. Also if you wanna like draw my trollsona pls do

Name: Scmare Ttieer [Seh-mar Tear] Origin of her name is unknown.

Age: 7.85 Alternian Sweeps [17 Human Earth Years]

Height: 5'6 feet tall. [Not including horns which are around a foot long]

Eyes: |See picture 5|

Gender: Female

BloodColour: Sapphire Blue |See picture 2|

Theme: Space

Quote From Her: "id rather StAy NEUTRAL on thE SituAtion. lEss ChAnCE of ConfRontAtion."

Symbol: |See picture 6|

Lusus: She didn't fully know what it was. It was a strange creature, not related to any of her interest or any creatures located on Alternia. She cared for it all the same.

Weapon: Double ended scythe |See picture 4| [Weapon is around 4 feet long]

Clothing: Black tank top coated in small white specs (represents stars), her symbol on the shirt in her blood colour. Sapphire blue button up over shirt. Black mid thigh shorts. Black boots.

Hair: Thick black hair. Rests just on her shoulders. Usually up in a high ponytail with a Sapphire blue bow.

Interest: Fiduspawn, singing, reading, drawing, crafting, astronomy and dancing

Dislikes: Confrontation, large groups of people, loud noises, herself

Face: Round in shape. Scar across the bridge of her nose. Square thick glasses covering her eyes. Only make up being some black eye liner |See in picture 5|

Body: Chubby body. Muffin top stomach with thick thighs and arms. Stretch marks on stomach and thighs. Weight is probably around 195 pounds.

Horns: |See picture 3|

Teeth: |See picture 1|

Powers: Aura reading, The ability to perceive energy fields surrounding people, places and things. If she focuses hard enough on person she can see colours surrounding their body. These colours can mean multiple things, from how they're feeling to if that person is inherently evil or good.

Troll Tag: dysfunctionalCosmos

Typing Quirk: Capitalizes letters that are in her first name (except when she types her actual name). But when it comes to the word "Neutral" she caps the whole word. Uses & instead of the word 'And' [Sample of a message she has sent. To whom is unknown:

gREEtingS & SAlutAtionS, My nAME iS Scmare Ttieer. It'S niCE to MEEt you. So uM...i dont hAvE MuCh tiME i nEEd to go finiSh SoME tRAining todAy. My LuSuS will SquAwk At ME if i dont, MAinly bEcAuSE i fEEd hiM AftER & will foRgEt to if i dont tRAin. I hopE wE cAn MEEt AgAin... ]

Hemoloyalty: She does not treat trolls of lower blood caste any worse than she would treat a troll of a high blood caste. Though, she does understand her place on the hemospectrum and that unless she wants to get culled she needs to show respect to highbloods. Describes it as being neutral, even though she doesnt approve of the way low bloods are viewed.

Hive: A very simple Hive, even if a bit futuristic looking.. Made of metal, the whole hive in a circular shape. An observatory located right in the middle of the building on the roof. Used for her interest in studying space.

Respiteblock: Messy room with clothes and tools on the floor. Posters of movies and videogames on the walls, along with some of her shitty drawings. Husktop located on a desk in the back of the room. Recuperacoon is located in a far right corner by a window.

Quadrants: None of hers are filled [Unless you count my self shipping, which can be explained elsewhere]

Ancestor: WIP |Will add link when she is finished|

Dancestor: WIP |Will add link when she is finished|

Basic Personality: [For this I have answered 20 questions to help you understand her personality. Hopefully this helps everyone get a clear grasp on what she's like. Since she is me anyway]

1: Is the character generally approachable or does she keep to herself? Why? A: She usually keeps to herself though she's not completely unapproachable. She finds approaching others to be difficult and usually waits for someone else to make the first move.

2: Is the character a hard-worker, or does she take it easy? Does this nature vary for any particular activity? A: Despite being a blueblood she more of a take it easy kinda troll. Though when she puts her mind to something she can work hard and get it done. Of course if she likes the activity, she is more likely to finish it quickly.

3: Does the character give plain answers to others or is she mysterious? A: Plain answers. She prefers to get to the point of what she means.

4: How does the character feel about pets? How about wild animals? Does she have a favorite animal/pet? A: She loves animals. Though she's afraid to go around them due to her strength. Being a blue blood she had a great amount of strength and hasn't learned to control it well. She worries she will hurt the animals and admires them from afar. She doesn't have a favourite as of now.

5: What is the character's religion? Is the character very religious? How does she show it/observe his religion? A: She is questioning her religious beliefs. She cant decide if she believes in a higher being, or if she thinks that too far fetched.

6: How does the character feel about the local ruler? A: She prefers not to take a stance, she doesn't love or hate them.

7: Does the character have any off-putting habits? A: She has a habit of biting her nails as well as biting skin off her lip. Only does this when nervous or bored.

8: What does the character do to relax? A: To relax she will read or sing. These activities calm her nerves the most.

9: Does the character have any unusual voice or speech pattern? A: Besides her typing quirk she doesn't have much trouble speaking clearly. Sometimes she can be too loud when excited about something, or too quiet when upset. She also tends to ramble when talking online and in person.

10: Why was the character given the name she has? A: She doesn't know where her name comes from or what it means. She believes there is no definition for her name, and that it is just a name unlike how other trolls names have meaning. She quit looking for a answer to it long ago.

11: Does the character have a nickname? What is the source of the nickname? Is it flattering or not? How does she react to it? A: Not being the most social Troll in public, she doesn't have many friends to give her nicknames. She was once called Krem online before and found it cute. So if she were to want to be called anything besides her name it would be Krem.

12: Has the character had issues with the law? A: She has never gone against the law. She doesn't like confrontation. Though she might end up having to.

13: Was there something unusual about her childhood? A: Besides her strange Lusus nothing was too weird for her at least.

14: Does the character have a mentor? A: She would consider her mentor her Lusus.

15: Does the character have a scar or some mark? What was the cause? A: The most obvious scar Is the one she has across the bridge of her nose. She got it when she built her first robot that ended up attacking her and cutting her nose. Smaller scars litter her body from accidents when building.

16: What does she consider her greatest achievement? A: Even though the robot attacked her, she considered it her greatest achievement. It was strong, hard to destroy and packed a punch. She was young when she made it, 4 sweeps, and to build something so sturdy at a young age surprised her.

17: Is she able to kill? Under what circumstances does she find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable? A: She is very much able to kill. But she only sees it fit if it is in self defense. She will not attack unless attacked first.

18: Does she believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love? A: She does, she believes even the most evil people have one.

19: How honest is she about her thoughts and feelings A: She tries to keep a lot of her feelings to herself in fear of being judged. Opening up emotionally like that is hard for her.

20: Does she care what others think of her? A: She does, she finds herself getting nervous out in public. Thinking other Trolls are judging her.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next part is a story the explains her background leading to present time.  Backstory Time.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[BS] You: Be the strange girls Trollsona  ======>

 You are now, Scmare Ttieer

You enjoy SINGING, DANCING, ASTRONOMY, CRAFTING, READING, DRAWING and a Alternia game called FIDUSPAWN. You are a quiet Troll, even if sometimes you enjoy BREAKING things loudly, who keeps your nose in your own business but opening up when you become close friends with someone. Close enough to fill the Moirail quadrant at the least.

You were hatched on the 9th bilunar perigee of the 1st dark season. Skipping your blurry wiggler days, you were chosen by a strange Lusus after passing your trials. You and your custodian then proceeded to build a secluded hive made of metal in a circular shape.

 You spent most of your younger days learning to build and studying outer space. Your fascination with planets and beings outside of your world was never disturbed by your Lusus, so you learned quickly that there was other life forms out there besides Trolls. You vaguely know of a Alien species called 'Humans' but have not gotten far in your studies.

 Next to that, You tried to learn how to control your strength and violent thoughts. As a blue blood, you has a incredible amount of strength even if your body doesn't look like it. You once busted a hole in the wall of your Hive that took you days to fix (your repair skill were still in development). Being in your blood caste, these things were expected of you, you were to become a solider after all.

 You don't know if you wants that though.

 You always had a strange opinion on the hemospecturm. After studying the history of your Dancestor and Ancestor you learned of the ways they reacted to it. You try to incorporate both of their ways into you view, in hopes of doing what they failed at, which was not dying because you have a opinion. Because of this you remain what you call 'Neutral'

 This means you are trying not to pick a side, in hopes of avoiding confrontation which could end in death on either side. You don't like treating low bloods like they are lesser than you, you never even called another troll a low blood. You also understands that going against a high blood could end in a culling, so you don't speak against them.

 The whole thing is confusing, even for you. Why can't you just make up your mind and fight for what you believe in! Well that's the thing you don't want to fight. Maybe one day you'll figure it all out, you are only 7 sweeps old after all.

  At  4 sweeps though, you made a robot. Your first one. You don't remember what its exact purpose was, but it definitely wasn't to attack you like it did. Which is how you got the scar across your nose. You had won the fight with a bit of damage, your Lusii didn't seem Impressed though.

 That was basically all of your past, building, training to control violent tendencies, doing activities you liked. Your Lusus was your only friend for a while, before you got into the online world one sweep ago. Talking to other Trolls is a lot easier when your behind a husktop. You mainly just play games and maybe have a conversation or two with some others playing with you.

 Even gained the nickname 'Krem' from someone you once talked with. You can't remember who it was or where the name came from, but ...you liked it.

 Now a days you haven't been online much. You'll be a adult soon, become a solider like your supposed you. You might skip out on that though.

 In case of the inevitable to try to go out more, to make friends but its not working. Its not just that you're shy and have anxiety (it mainly is though), its also becase of your Aura reading abilities. Because of this hard to explain power you can tell if a person if bad or good. Angry or happy. You tend to stay away from the Trolls with bad auras.

 Its also takes a lot of focus (since you have trouble focusing on anything for a long time in the first place) to see someone's Aura. So when they catch you starring at them its hard to talk to them after wards and explain why you were looking at them like you were trying not to explode.

 Anyway that's all there really is to say about you. Not too special you see. You live a simple life which is what you wanted. You hope it can stay simple.

 [BS] You: Quit being the Trollsona and go back to scrolling

[merccier]

hey becca!! i dont know if you like answer ps questions but,,, i was wondering 2 things: how did you make those duo color gifs? especially the ones were everything is black and white except for certain things. and if there was any way to up the quality of a gif? like sometimes the video quality is shit so is there anyway to make it better??? thank you !! your edits are beautiful and you are very talented !! have a great day <33

Don’t worry about asking! I love explaining things!

To answer your first question:  

It’s actually a lot easier to make gifsets in one solid color than make 2-colored gifsets, haha. For the latter, you really spend a lot of time tweaking with the adjustments until you really have the desired colors. And the amount of time you spend coloring one single gif very much depends based on how bland and different your original gif was. 

Take this gif for instance:

I went from this:

to this:

The change is pretty drastic but I assure you that the technique I used for this is pretty simple!

For this you’ll definitely need your swatches. So you better open up your swatches on photoshop and grab the following colors:

Since they’re the brightest possible RGB-red and -blue, they’ll be very easy to find, and since we’re going for an extremely saturated GIF anyway, these colors will be very easy to achieve.

First of, you’re going to need your timeline on photoshop to be in Video Timeline, which looks like this

I prefer to keep it this way because (in my own opinion) it’s way more versatile should you be working with costumized layers.

You’ll achieve this by clicking on the button on the bottom left of your timeline.

For the next step I’m gonna use a pretty simple trick.

Open up a new layer and at this on top of the timeline which is your gif. You can fill in this layer however you want to. In this case, we are going to use those swatches we’ve grabbed earlier to mark down the areas we want in this particular color. In this case, we want the background to be bright red and the teludav-y thing bright blue. So we’re going to grab our brush and make a swatch on top of your gif as a reference.

From this point on, our purpose is to use our adjustments and work ourselves up to the point that this gif is in the exact same colors as those swatches we’ve added.

SO for this you select your GIF timeline and start coloring! To achieve this I definitely suggest starting of with Selective Color and If you still don’t have the exact color that you want, add a second layer of the same adjustment and tbh…. you can use as many layers as you want… trust me.. it’s works. You can go completely freestyle with the adjustments as long as your background is bright red and the center is bright bue!

Since the example gif is pretty easy, the amount of adjustments I used are pretty minimal.

This is how it looks like!

It’s really hard to give an accurate tutorial on how I exactly color this stuff, since the complexity and difficulty highly depends on how your GIF looks…. But I definitely start out ALL THE TIME with adding those swatches! They come in REALLY handy if you’re making a gifset where the EXACT same colors are required, which I do all the time.

As for the black and white gifset. This is pretty much the same principle, expect you can use Hue/Saturation to cancel out all the colors you don’t wanna include, which is this icon:

You want your gif to be blue only? Cancel out the red by toning down the saturation.

and you get this as a result!

As for your 2nd question:

try using these Unsharp Mask 1st and Surface Blur 2nd when you’re sharpening your GIF, using these settings:

And the way you save your GIF is pretty crucial to your GIF quality too. So when you save, try using these settings:

Hope that helped!

[survivormontenegro]

Episode 6: "Hmmm #conspiracy" - Ian

SIKE I LIVED AHAHAHHAA. WE CRUSHED BLUDVA. Bludva who???????

WOOOOOO WE WON!!! I WAS ACTUALLY GOOD AT SOMETHING. That being said if Tom, Evan, Jules or JJ goes home I will start a fire in your bathroom. Not really because I’m too scared to use matches but I will be very UPSET.

That was probably one of the most unsettling rounds I have ever played. So like before I slept last night, JJ and I went on call and he spilled his guts to me. Literally offered me a lot of things saying he will be loyal to us four and all. I didn’t want to have that conversation but I had to in order to see if I can get anything from JJ.

Unfortunately even tho he was telling me how Evan, Jules and Tom betrayed him I got nothing new from him. Like he was not telling information that would earn my favor like info on his other tribe mates. So I told him I will consider his offer and I slept woo

Flash forward to the morning I wake up and us 4 Budva baes we’re debating the merits of keeping Evan or JJ. Jason and Julia were entertaining the idea of keeping JJ and voting out Evan because he has some connections to the other og Durmitor and Ali and I were pushing to keep the target on JJ. Me and Ali discussed this earlier and we know that JJ was gonna try do whatever it takes to stay. We both agreed that by keeping JJ that would screw over Tom and Jules who were the ones willing to flip for us. And so Ali finally brought that up and I think that convinced Jason and Julia to stick with the JJ vote. Jason also learned from Jules that JJ is very well connected with the other og Durmitor so that pretty much sold it.

Like minutes before tribal JJ made a chat with him and us 4 Budva minus the hosts oof! He pleaded his case and I AM NOT COMFROTABLE WE THOSE KIND OF THINGS!! So I ignored those messages and just endured and then JJ was voted out and he got into a small argument with Julia and Jules.

Right now, the plan if we go to tribal again is to get rid of Evan because he’s a SNAKE!!

i can't remember when i last confessed but stuff has happened so... whew.

okay so! first things first, JJ is gone. which it was his time and byebye. I think Evan is likely next, he just alienated EVERYONE, including JJ who he leaked stuff too, who voted for him so rest in peace.

also emathia, can't keep secrets Ali truly jumped out on call with Jules yesterday. I truly told her everything. ALSO CRAP I JUST MISSED MY STEP FOR THE CHALLENGE GRR. but yup, she knows about the idol, that I trust Benj and that I hosted Mo for his first season (all the stuff I hadn't originally told her). I am committed to going as far as possible with her, we are WINNING!

in other news, i now know tom is sus about working with me. WHICH AHH NERVY. i really want him to trust me, and will do my best to show that trust is worth it.

in other... other news... I have thoughts about the other four I haven't played with yet. I assume Benj is who flipped and I'm proud of him for doing what he needs to do. Of the four I haven't met, we have:

Caeleb, aka Tom's cousin. IM CONVINCED. IM 100% CONVINCED THEY ARE RELATED. Tom can deny it ALL HE WANTS, but I am onto the ancestry.com (lowkey they aren't related but its super funny to me ankslfda)

Jones, aka... a queen? Jones seems SO NICE, LIKE SO SO NICE. I really wanna meet her and play with her, I hope she wins! She has come 4th and 6th... like she is a threat and someone to defo keep an eye on.

Mo! I love him!! I don't think he likes me, but if he does I'd love love LOVE to work with him! bang voyage woo we love him

Alex C... makes me the most nervous. Jules says he runs stuff and Julia has bad history with him! I feel like he is gonna be someone who by game dynamics I'm unable to work with, even though I'd like to! we will see on that one... hold that thought!

anyway, the dream is a F4 of me, Jules, Benj & Tom, Julia can go 5th for working with Jason/Ian too much, and then maybe like Mo/Jones in 6-7 because they seem iconic and would just love 'em to go far! idk this is mess aklsdfaf

Hmm what are the odds that this challenge is an individual immunity challenge disguised as a tribe immunity challenge. Hmmm #conspiracy

Anyways, the plan is if we lose immunity we get rid of the snake in the grass which Evan. He can continue wearing his frog onesie but that doesn’t change the fact that you are a snake!! I just learned that Evan is telling Jules that me and Jason need to be broken up.

I love how these people like assumed me/Jason and Ali/Julia are pairs. Like ok that’s what y’all think then we will work with it. My only real worry is that if we do get rid of Evan there is no more cushion for us in this tribe. Like Tom and Jules are numbers for us rn (and I AM LOVING THEM RN) and if we don’t swap/merge after this round and there is still another immunity and we lose it then whew that’s gonna be a big dilemma. So yeah that’s the only thing holding me back from throwing this challenge hehehe

im on call with tom, i want him to win and i am planting the seeds and WILL see them harvest.

this game's F3 better be Jules, Tom & Benj. I WILL ACCEPT NO OTHER OUTCOME.

So with this challenge, I honestly didn't put alot of effort into it but neither did anyone in my alliance really. We kinda wanted to lose because we can get rid of another durmitor person and keep the other budvas safe from the uglies on the other tribe. With merge coming, I know who my targets are. MO AND ALEX. Bye you have both seen me play and frankly i dont have any respect for either of you. I'm gonna make it my dying wish to see you both fail. Also last night Jules and I lied to evan and said we were cousins to see if he would start drama. He didn't and he believed it too and he trusts us now wtf lol. He shouldnt because I want him gone 100%.

If we lose this challenge then hopefully Evan goes. Then after that please let us merge already or we swap and I’m still in a majority position. I cannot lose anyone in this tribe after Evan goes because they’re all potential numbers for me when we merge.

On another note, Jason, tom and I solidified our alliance. Don’t know where we and Jason really gonna go with because we also have OG budva baes but rn I guess this alliance is here to stay I guess? Can’t wait to become the goat for these two!!

why am i paranoid

okay so i am fully missing some brain cells. i was trying to add tom on sc before we recorded this so had to fix the video on him to get the QR code, and then... never turned that off... so enjoy a video of tom with me in the background like a ghostie or a spirit.

Watching Tom make literal pizza is ASMR.

Okay so I'm watching BB21 and the amount of ad breaks on US shows is INSANE, so I have time to type.

I'm going to... crack next vote if we go to tribal this round. I feel really really good about Tom in this game moving forward, and... refuse to have him go home prejury (which could happen if we go to two tribals in a row).

So I have two plans, both of which are cracked and both of which will solidify my mess self.

1. A 3-2-1 vote. Convince Julia/Jason/Ian to split the votes between Tom and Jules, and then me/Tom/Jules vote for idk... Ian? This would burn bridges like crazy but hopefully merge could help me figure that whole mess out.

2. Give... Tom my idol. Now this would be CRACKED as all crackers. But if we play it off right it'll be fine. Only other complication is that Benj knows about my idol, which he could spread ahh!

but ignoring the crackheadery, the best case scenario is we win immunity and then next round we get Evan out... then we will be fine hdjdjdkd

I change my mind we’re def not merging at F13 Bc Drew Seamus and Asya (to an extent Bc she’s innocent) are definitely gonna wanna milk the dua lipa cave twist until it’s BONE DRY!!!! But ya hopefully we lose and Michael goes home xoxo

[wyrmsandrocs]

You know what you dared (anyone really) me personally to send all the writer asks so FUCKIBG ALL OF THEM BETCH

1. Favorite place to write. - I really like taking my laptop with me and writing at parks or in hotel lobbies when my fam travels, but its comfortable and familiar to write at my desk in my room2. Favorite part of writing. - letting characters be sassy and snarky. also letting characters heal.3. Least favorite part of writing. - actually putting words on the page lmfao4. Do you have writing habits or rituals? - i put on my writing playlist and if i can grab a diet coke bc it helps me feel like im ready to be productive5. Books or authors that influenced your style the most. - ooh, for writing style Caroline Lawrence’s books influenced me a lot when i was younger and more recently @lbardugo and six of crows6. Favorite character you ever created. - ahhh probably Linde, a shapeshifter who rejects all human concepts including gender7. Favorite author. - again, Leigh Bardugo. also @canipetyourdragon but like technically shes not published yet 8. Favorite trope to write. - enemies to lovers lmfao9. Least favorite trope to write. - ahh idek 10. Pick a writer to co-write a book with and tell us what you’d write about. - @canipetyourdragon and we’d probs write abt some wacky adventure11. Describe your writing process from scratch to finish. - 1) have an idea and daydream abt it for a month 2) worldbuilding/character building for a g e s 3) finally get around to writing a shitty draft 4) s u f f e r 12. How do you deal with self-doubts? - whine at someone and then remind myself that nothing starts perfect and i have time to make it better. tbqh a lot of the time i remind myself that Six of Crows started as smthn like 31,000 words and is a lot longer in the final form and, no offense to leigh, was probs kinda crap at first lmfao13. How do you deal with writers block? - i remind myself that its not gonna get written if i dont write it, i sit my ass down, and i write something. anything. any stupid sentence. and then i write another one.14. What’s the most research you ever put into a book? - hoo boi am i bad at research n o t m u c h 15. Where does your inspiration come from? - a lot of my inspiration comes from music and other books, i have playlists that remind me of my characters and story on spotify and those help a lot16. Where do you take your motivation from? - i remember that i’ve always wanted to be a writer since i was like 5 and could barely write my name and i think about how much i want that to be a reality.17. On avarage, how much writing do you get done in a day? - ehh i’d say maybe 400 words on average? the least ive written recently is 100 words the most was 1,50018. What’s your revision or rewriting process like? - ah i havent worked on one story enough to know yet19. First line of a WIP you’re working on. - No matter how many she saw, Siora couldn’t get used to Outer Land bars.

20. Post a snippet of a WIP you’re working on. - “In a shocking plot twist, the rich Kitonian girl used to be a thief,” Linde said, mimicking some sort of announcer.

“Are you just here to add sarcastic commentary?” Siora glared at them.

She seems to glare at them a lot, Dema thought.

“That’s the whole reason I’m following you,” they said, then added, “Don’t give me that look, you know I don’t really care about the war.”

“My question is why is Siora still putting up with you,” Asteria laughed.

“Don’t give me any ideas,” The Beati girl grumbled, a smile playing on her lips.

“Oh yes, don’t encourage her. She might try to hurt me with one of her toothpicks.”

Dema laughed, “Don’t insult a lady’s knives, it’s not wise.”

“What’s a lady?” The Gerum asked, feigning confusion.

“Dema is a lady,” Asteria kissed the girl on the cheek, laughing.

“Doesn’t seem very ladylike to me,” Siora snorted.

“Like you’re one to talk,” Dema shot back.

“If anyone here is a lady, it’s me,” Linde said, sticking their nose in the air.

“You aren’t even a girl!” Asteria shrieked, grinning.

“Fair enough,” They nodded.

21. Post the last sentence you wrote in one of your WIP’s. - “Yep, now we’re just doing a final check to make sure we have everything,” The girl said without looking up.22. How many drafts do you need until you’re satisfied and a project is ultimately done for you? - ahh depends i havent really “completed” any big projects, but for short stories usually only one or two23. Single or multi POV, and why? - multiple because i have so many characters and none of them is really the /main/ character24. Poetry or prose, and why? - i love prose but tbh im a poet at heart i write a l o t of poetry

25. Linear or non-linear, and why? - linear, otherwise i get too confused26. Standalone or series, and why? - standalone, because i think the story im working on rn is only one book long. altho i do have another story in this world planned dont tell anyone 27. Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished? - i share as i write

28. And who do you share them with? only sharing with @canipetyourdragon tho29. Who do you write for? - myself and my future readers30. Favorite line you’ve ever written. - for prose? “You complain so much I’m starting to think it’s a religious observance,” Siora said, leaning against the wall. the answer is dif for poetry tho31. Hardest character to write. - a s t e r i a i love her but shes not fully fleshed out yet. also shes so good32. Easiest character to write. - linde that snarky bastard33. Do you listen to music when you’re writing? - yep i have a playlist that reminds me of my story34. Handwritten notes or typed notes? - both35. Tell some backstory details about one of your characters in your story. - Siora was raised to be the right hand guard of the princess, but was exiled when she died.36. A spoiler for story? - the villain gets redeemed37. Most inspirational quote you’ve ever read or heard that’s still important to you. - hm i really dont know. writing wise, i love the quote “if the muse is late for work, start without her.”

38. Have you shared your outline of your story with someone? If so, what did they think of it? - I tell wyna about all my story shenanigans and schemes, and so far i think she likes it lmao39. Do you base your characters of real people or not? If so, tell us about one.- not characters i like. sometimes background redshirts are based on people i hate so that i can kill them40. Original Fiction or Fanfiction, and why? - both. I love writing fanfiction, but i also have a lot of original stories to tell41. How many stories do you work on at one time? - only one at a time for me42. How do you figure out your characters looks, personality, etc. - a lot of the time it just comes to me, but i also answer ask memes like this as that character43. Are you an avid reader? -  y e s 44. Best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten. - hm im really not sure45. Worst piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten. - most unhelpful? “it sucked ass” - daedalus46. What would your story look like as a tv show or movie? - o h dude i would love to see it as a movie it would be a really cool fantasy aesthetic omg the effects for the shapeshifters would be so cool to see

47. Do you start with characters or plot when working on a new story? - this story actually started with setting48. Favorite genre to write in. - YA isnt a genre is it? technically fantasy i guess49. What do you find the hardest to write in a story, the beginning, the middle or the end? - the middle for sure50. Weirdest story idea you’ve ever had. - idk abt story idea but when i was 12 i killed a character by turning him into a tortilla ¯\_(ツ)_/¯51. Describe the aesthetic of your story in 5 sentences or words. - fantasy eclectic influence and design.52. How did writing change you? - honestly writing poetry gave me a way to express my feelings safely. it honest to gods helped me stop self-harming.53. What does writing mean to you? - to me it means putting my ideas and thoughts and self into the world in a way that people (hopefully) read and enjoy54. Any writing advice you want to share? - start writing and dont stop. if you think that its crap, remember that everything starts as crap, and if you think no one in the world wants to read it, remember that i definitely want to read it if you tell me about it.

tysm for asking omg!