#i was freaking out so hard bc no one else seemed to care but other kids around

[theonpilled]

x

[corroded-hellfire]

Hi gorgeous a fic request idea it's my first time requesting so sorry if I'm doing it wrong! What about reader being insecure about herself and worrying she's not smart or hot enough for Eddie and it's just Eddie being confused bc how could she think that wen he's the town freak?? and then reassuring her and just lots of fluff

Ah, this is so relatable! I know I need Eddie to reassure me. Also, the only way to request wrong is by being rude and you most definitely were not 💕

Words: 1.2k

You’re not sure what caused the recent feeling of inadequacy, but you just can’t shake it. The last few weeks it feels like a storm has been rolling in bit by bit, always adding something new to the pile of things you already dislike about yourself. The little things that have always irked you in the back of your mind steadily keep making their way forward, pushing and shoving like there’s a clearance sale on your happiness and they want first dibs. 

It doesn’t matter that your grades are holding steady because you answered a question wrong in class today when the teacher called on you. You’re such an idiot. There’s a new pimple growing in like a second head near your lips. You’re so gross. The weather be damned, your hair is going to look a wreck rain or shine. You’re such a mess. The clothes the other girls wear are flattering and beautiful, making yours look like dirty dish rags in comparison. You’re such a loser. 

Despite trying your damnedest to hide how you’re feeling from the world, your boyfriend knows you too well for that. Eddie notices the way you lose focus, your attention drifting somewhere else—internally, he’s afraid. 

Your latest zone out is while the two of you are sitting on his couch, watching a movie. A part that you’ve laughed at a million times before comes on and Eddie can tell your brain hasn’t even registered what’s on screen. He keeps stealing glances at you from the corner of his eye, growing more concerned each time. Eventually, he can’t take it anymore. 

“Babe, what’s wrong?”

“Hmm?” You’re broken out of your stupor and meet Eddie’s gaze with glassy eyes.

“What’s going on?” he asks, concern etched deep into his brow.

“What do you mean?” You know your attempt at playing dumb won’t work either—on top of everything else, you’re a shit actress too. 

“You’ve seemed sad lately. Kind of…distant,” Eddie says, taking care to choose his words carefully. He doesn’t want you to feel as if he’s interrogating you but wants to convey his genuine worry and concern.  

Shame floods your body as you realize Eddie has noticed your change lately. Just another thing for you to feel bad about. You shift awkwardly, moving out from under Eddie’s arm, where you were nestled comfortably. 

“N-Nothing’s wrong.”

Eddie gives you a disbelieving look. You can’t blame him; that was some pretty shitty bluffing.

“Sweetheart,” he starts, “you think I don’t know you well enough to tell when something’s wrong? When you’re lying?”

“You do,” you admit, voice low and soft. 

It’s a mutual instinct, though, as you can read Eddie just as well. The sadness in his eyes cracks your heart in two, knowing you’re what’s causing it. 

“Talk to me,” Eddie says, taking one of your hands. He holds your hand in both of his and gently massages it. “What’s wrong?” 

“I don’t know,” you say with a shrug, trying to avoid his eyes. “I just feel…off lately.”

“How so?”

Embarrassment grows inside of you, blooming like a flower—or maybe a weed. It’s hard for you to bring yourself to tell Eddie the truth–it just makes you feel even more pathetic than you already are. There’s no use trying to keep it from him any longer, though. 

“Like I’m not…enough.”

“Enough? Enough of what?” Eddie’s brow furrows in confusion as he keeps rubbing his thumbs along the back of your hands. 

“Well, enough for you,” you admit as you feel your cheeks burn with the humiliation that the truth brings.

“Me?” Eddie’s eyebrows pinch together, and he shakes his head. “I don’t understand.”

You breathe out a defeated sigh that breaks Eddie’s heart and take your hand from his grasp. 

“I see all the other girls,” you say, anger creeping into your tone. Not anger at Eddie or at the other girls; anger at yourself for being so inferior. “They’re so pretty and smart and I can’t help but wonder why you want to be with me.”

Every word you say confuses and shocks Eddie even further.

“You…huh?” Eddie says, mind not able to comprehend what’s going on. In his mind, there is not a single dimension or alternate reality where you aren’t enough for him. It’s simply not possible. 

“I’m not hot enough for you,” you say with a sniffle and a shrug. “Or smart enough. Or nice enough, or funny enough—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Eddie says, waving his hands in front of him. “You’re not serious, are you?”

The look on your face and the tears about to spill from your eyes when you look at him tell him that you are, though. Eddie can’t help but let out a breathy chuckle and shake his head.

Your brow furrows at his laughter and a tear escapes your eye and makes its way down your cheek. Panic flashes in Eddie’s eyes when he sees your reaction and he’s quick to remedy the situation. 

“Oh, no, no!” he says. His hands come up to cup your face and his thumb wipes away your rogue tear. “I don’t think it’s funny. Well, in a way I kind of do. You think you’re not enough for me? Sweetheart, you really have no idea how amazing you are, do you?” When your only reply is another sniffle, Eddie sighs. “I don’t understand how you could think that,” he says. “You do know you’re dating the town freak, right?”

“But you’re not,” you insist defiantly. 

“And you’re not all those mean things you think about yourself.” He lets his hands fall down to your lap and takes your smaller ones in his. “Babe, you’re so insanely hot I can’t even believe you noticed me.”

Eddie chuckles and squeezes your hands. “And aren’t you the one always helping me with homework? Don’t I always get better grades when you help me?”

Eddie sighs and leans forward to rest his forehead against yours. You’re both quiet for a few moments. Eddie lets his eyes slip closed for a second before looking at you once again.  

“I hate that you’ve been feeling so down about yourself. I wish you saw yourself like I do. You’d see that you’re the most beautiful, wonderful woman in the world. Who is smart, who is kind, who is funny, who is everything she tells herself she’s not.” He leans in and presses a soft, sweet kiss against your lips. “I love you. I love you more than anything else in the world,” he tells you.

“I love you, too,” you reply in a whisper, tear tracks staining your cheeks. 

“Now, look at me,” Eddie says. He sits up straight and looks you in the eye.

“I am,” you say in a small voice.

“Am I lying?”

You know him so well, know when he’s telling even the slightest fib. But there’s no sign of that in Eddie’s eyes nor on his face at all. 

“No,” you admit.

“Come here,” Eddie says with a sigh, opening his arms for you.

Immediately you fall into them and nuzzle your face against his shirt. It’s your safe place; everything is always better when your head is on Eddie’s chest.

“Promise you’ll tell me when you have these thoughts, yeah?” he asks and presses a kiss to the top of your head. “And I’ll remind you that they’re not true. That you’re my gorgeous, brilliant girl. Promise me?”

“I promise,” you say, tilting your head up to look him in the eye.

He kisses your lips a few times, punctuating the message of his words. 

“You're my favorite,” he whispers against your mouth as you part. 

“Favorite what?”

“Everything.”

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Kyōko Kagawa (Tokyo Story, Sansho the Bailiff)— She's just so charming and talented and pretty what else could you want

Sophia Loren (Marriage Italian Style, Houseboat)—Major Italian star, first actress to win an Oscar for a performance not in English (for Two Women (1960)) and later when Roberto Benigni won an Oscar in 1999 he jumped over the chairs towards the stage going "Sophia Sophia!!" because he was running towards Sophia Loren and said he cared more about her than the Oscar, that's the effect she had on people. She was big in the 60s already even though she gained a lot more notoriety after that. And I mean. Can we take a moment and just.

This is round 2 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Kyōko Kagawa:

Sophia Loren:

im submitting her in honor of my dad bc she was the first celebrity crush of his he ever admitted to me and my sister :) and he was right. shes so pretty

She has maxed out all her stats: beauty, elegance, sensuality, she's got it all. her mesmerizing eyes, her sensual mouth, her sharp face shape, her everything is so striking and unlike any other beauty in films. she was also voted the world most beautiful woman when she was freaking 65

OSCAR WINNER. Worked with some of the hottest leading men in Hollywood but remained faithful to her husband whom she had a loving marriage with till he died (even though Cary Grant almost tempted her once, it's complicated)

One of the most well-known sex symbols of the Golden Age of Hollywood, and unlike some unfortunate others, she seems to have been pretty well at peace with occupying that status. She made assertiveness and a tempestuous temper seem glamorous, and although she's famous for side-eying Jayne Manisfield's cleavage, honestly? She's one to talk.

Absolutely, drop-dead sexy, also a hard working, extraordinarily talented actress who didn't shy away from the less glamorous roles to gift us some gritty, memorable performances

JUST LOOK AT HER Y'ALL

Submitting this on behalf of my dad, who knows nothing of tumblr or this blog, but I remember being a kid watching Houseboat while my mom thirsted after Cary Grant, dad thirsted after Sophia Loren, and I was excited that they lived on a boat. Anyway, she's extremely beautiful and was an international star, doing a ton of movies in Italy before being recognized in the US.

Big in the chest, snatched in the waist, pretty in the face 😳

Very smart and beautiful, the characters that she played (I mean those in the movies that I put in the previous question) are as strong and determined as her which I think adds to her hotness.

Global superstar and my late grandfather's long time movie star crush and for a man as quiet as he was, and as hopelessly devoted to his wife as he was, the fact that I know that means she was EXCEPTIONAL.

Sexy, beautiful, deep. A real star.

Her performance in "Man of La Mancha" is just so very captivating. Dubbed as "the Italian Marilyn Monroe", she looks beautiful in any movie and at any age.

Forget the exotic sexpot of her Hollywood films and go back to her Italian career: sparking with Marcello Mastroianni as the woman who drives him mad and outwits all his fumbling attempts at macho posturing in their early films, and showing a tender side in their 1970s films. Sophia isn’t self-conscious about who she is or her beautiful body: she enjoys being herself and she wants us all to enjoy ourselves too.

She starred in films as a sexually emancipated persona and was one of the best known sex symbols of the time. She is a great cook and her filmography is immense.

On the misattributed quote that Sophia owed everything to spaghetti: 'Did you actually say the quote frequently attributed to you, "Everything you see I owe to spaghetti"?' "Non è vero! It's not true! It's such a silly thing. I owe it to spaghetti, no, no. Completely made up."

[koishua]

queen of tears spoilers!!

identity is above all else, it seems like. ep 14 of queen of tears ruined me in all the good ways. when the question is "do you want to die as yourself?" vs "are you willing to live at the cost of who you are as a person?", the ultimate answer hae-in gives is no. she'd rather come to peace with the prospect of death with all of her memories of loving and, in turn, being loved coming with her. the death of memories is more painful than the death of her life itself. hyunwoo begging and sobbing in her arms does not deter her, however much she wants to keep on living. as herself. keep on living as the hong hae-in who loved dearly and who was loved, desperately so.

a loss of identity is death to everything that ever had a hand in helping her become who she is now. this brings me to the phrase "death is for the living". the dead do not mourn or face the aftermath of their last breath in the world of the living. the living, those who are left behind, are the ones who truly know what death is. so it is painful when hyunwoo, the man who isn't struck with the terminal illness bound to take her life any time soon, begs almost on his knees for hae-in, the woman who's counting the seconds left she has to live, to give up her sense of self. it's understandable how both of them stand strong in their desires. one fears becoming a stranger to all that she loves and one fears becoming familiar to life without the one he cannot live without. so he does everything in his power to have her take the surgery (all effort is in vain, she will not give up her identity).

i love this episode so much. im still only halfway through it but i had to give my two cents. such a beautifully tragic dilemma of two people who love. one loves by wanting to remember, one loves by giving everything to make her live. have a taste of love again for the first time. he says that he'll be the first person she'll meet and get to know again after the surgery. that he will still be there for her when she wakes up a completely different, empty, and lost person. he wants her to live, does not care if she'll ever even be able to reconnect with him ever again. he believes that she deserves to wake up another day and smile. to still be able to make new memories.

in the end they're both very selfish people who love selflessly.

edit: help me my stomach hurts from laughing so hard oml not him using his face and body card to annoy her into living. using jealousy as a mean to motivate her to take the freaking surgery and live ugh im in tears ahhahahah i love how if she doesn't become convinced the first few times when he's nice, he just intentionally pisses her off or annoys her into doing things to help herself 😭😭 thr only way to get hae-in motivated to live: make her mad at himself and have her do beneficial things out of sheer SPITE

edit 2: NO WHAT THE FOUK JUST HAPPENED POOR HYUNWOO OH MY GOD the way he lost all strength in his knees my god he crumbled in front of her feet he got a taste of what losing her felt like with that massive crash im still in shock i can't imagine having to witness that and trying to get through the car window to help save her and then not find her there?? and then she appears unscathed thankfully and he feels like a bucket of ice cold water drops over his head??? man they have to be so much more careful from now on bc the amount of yandereism the other guy is exhibiting ugh and the evil mother saying she'll help him out with "i can't stop till the moment i die" wtf??? OMG SHE'S GETTING THE SURGERY WHAT WHAT WHAT "i promised i would never make you cry after we get married" WOMAN HE'S BEEN SOBBING HIS SOUL OUT EVERY EPISODE SINCE!!!! 😭😭 ALSO NOOOOO NOT MY BOY SOOCHEOL GOING THROUGH IT AGAIN I CANT TAKE IT PLS MAKE HIM HAPPY WITH HIS LITTLE FAMILY I WILL CRYYYYYYYY he's gonna have MAJOR trust issues lmfao

[pagodazz]

Noah Maxwell hcs

for @freezingmcxn

I unprivated my Noah playlist just for this

(I honestly didn't know what kind of music to add for him. so I don't know if this will be him much at all)

One thing I can say for SURE is that I do not have the same kind of hcs for him as I do for everyone else, in fact his are very very angst oriented. so.

Tw for drug and alcohol abuse and shit (bc TT just acts like he doesn't have a problem, when bros literally an addict & alcoholic)

but I'm no where as attached to him like I am attaching to other characters so I cannot promise accuracy

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Noah is the kind of guy that would sit in bed all day and wait for other people to reach out to him before be makes any attempt to reach out to them, because honestly, I don't think Noah will think of other people when he's alone. He's too focused on whatever he's dealing with to stop and make time for others unless they demand it from him.

He doesn't exactly mean to do it to be rude, he just genuinely seems to forget other people even exist when he's alone. Unless it's Milo or Kevin, sometimes he'll forget them, but they're usually people he keeps in contact with most, so it's hard to push them out of his memory. his excessive drinking and drug use also is no help with his memory, and neither is the collective.

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I think Noah often lays awake at night staring into the darkness seeing if he can see the faces of the collective, or even worse, His own face. So he gives up on sleeping, and he decides to focus all his attention to being online.

He probably keeps the lights on after a while, and he'll learn how to ignore the movement he sees out of the corner of his eyes and he'll distract himself by answering questions, or by ignoring everyone and just binging his favorite shows or doing his own half assed research.

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I think that Noah tends to get sick alot, to the point where he can barley tolerate any amount of food in his system without feeling the instant need to vomit it all up. He probably even get in his head telling himself that he doesn't even deserve it, he hasn't worked hard enough to get these things he wants.

I imagine he shakes alot, hes almost frozen to the touch. You'd probably have to give him the biggest and softest blanket you have just to keep him kinda warm.

I also believe he gets aggressive when he isn't able to drink or take something, not like he's demanding to have it, but more like everything is annoying him and he's FREAKING THE FUCK OUT over being out. He cannot handle a single moment alone with his thoughts, he knows he will literally LOSE HIS MIND.

He hates silence for sure but he hates the sound of his own voice even more.

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Noah is a very delicate man, and he pretty much expects to be treated as such, but he NEVER is. He's kicked and beaten and thrown around and he gets back up, because he has to.

His ribs will ache and his lungs will burn and he'll hate the way he has to scrub the blood off his skin again and again, and he'll hear the sound of everyone laughing at him and he'll just feel so utterly humiliated by everything that he'll just have to completely hide himself.

He'll crumble over and just sob until he can't anymore and he'll find whatever he can take to ease the pain, and he'll take too much and he'll throw himself onto the bed and he'll start his routine all over again in the morning, and he knows that it'll only ever get worse for him.

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I think that Noah genuinely blames himself for the things other people are going through, even tho he has an AWFUL time showing it. we can use firebrand and prebrand as an example, they're both so FULL of guilt and that means obviously Noah is too.

Noah honestly thinks if he acts like he doesn't care at all, nothing bad will happen, but that's just not gonna work, because he can't stay away from the collective, they are coming to him. he doesn't have the option for escape like he thinks he does, he only has a choice in how he ends up. As a god or just a man who was useless and pathetic and has nothing to offer the world.

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Yyayy okay there's those,,, Patrick and Michael coming up,,, BUT. HONESTLY IM SORRY IF THESE DONT FIT HIM, I genuinely gotta rewatch tribetwelve when I'm NOT stoned out of my FUCKING MIND. I hope one of these works atleast

[teaableu]

feelin down and i just love this blog sm. i was wondering if u had any dtk (or kidstar) hc’s u wanted to share maybe. if not though i hope u have a wonderful day, seeing u on my dash always makes me smile.

OH MY GOD A SOUL EATER ASK?? /POS

i just got a huge serotonin boost tysm anon

YES I DO I JUST GOTTA GO GRAB EM

dtk:

the older Kid gets the less human he seems. Like once he's a full shinigami he gets a whole bunch of power that his dad had that sort of strip away his likeness to humans

going off of ^^ I think Kid's human form is constructed. His true form probably looks more like LD but it's not something he was particularly taught to embody/access so he just sorta stays in his human form

HOWEVER, I really like the idea that Kid just sorta.. generally freaks people out. There's a theory of horror that says monster characters can feel scary just because even though they look it, people can tell they are not quite human. and i think Kid has exactly that effect on people

Kid has regenerative powers because his human form is more of a construct/image than an actual biological organism. he's really made of the same stuff from LD's "cape". so he can't really be killed or severely injured for long, especially as he matures and gets more powerful. I think the only way he can take permanent damage is if his soul itself is affected. Sure he can be hurt and it does hurt but soon he learns to sort of turn off extreme pain, and he always ALWAYS regenerates or recovers. But he's always aware that his friends don't. so if he needs to he'll throw himself in front of his human friends if they're dealt a fatal hit to make sure they aren't severely hurt. This becomes a bad habit when he's older. But his friends always try to protect him too and take care of him, and he unlearns the habit

Liz and Patty set him up on social media and he started with a whopping 1 follower for like a week, but then got millions of followers overnight after Soul (who has a good following count bc of his family's social status) mentioned him and everyone freaked out. That was the way the world found out Lord Death's kid existed. He and Soul destroy bullies together online. Patty pretends to be Kid on his account.

Kid is the Adrien Agreste of soul eater. very popular, people love the image they see of him in the news and interviews and stuff (I think its a lot harder for him to avoid publicity after the anime), but he's a lot different in person and only really gets close to the people who get to know him. everyone else has a sort of skewed perception of him. AKA he is Death's Son and Death's son only to them

Kid can sing but he typically doesn't because he likes to prepare first but doesn't particularly want to take the time to learn a song correctly. He appreciates the art but wouldn't do it. the only thing he knows well is some ancient song his dad taught him in some sort of inhuman language. he sang it ONE time and it freaked Liz out so much she didn't speak to him for a week

Before Kid took them in, Liz would sing ONLY for Patty. And only to comfort her. She did this after they moved into the manor too, when Patty would get nightmares from their life before or just generally have a hard time or anything. One time after Patty woke up from a nightmare and Liz went in to calm her down, Kid was walking by and just stopped at the almost-closed door when he heard Liz singing because A. He wants to know if his sisters are ok and B. He probably doesn't hear many people sing casually, and has definitely never heard Liz sing before and it's... nice?? He stays there for a while but moves on the second Liz finishes so he's not caught. He doesn't say anything. But then after one awful awful mission, Liz is singing to help Patty sleep and Kid just. Stands in the doorway, disheveled and exhausted and they all just,, stare at each other for a moment until Patty opens her arms and Kid shuffles over, a little embarrassed and puts his head in her lap. They are all very tired. And then Liz (after getting over herself) just keeps singing until the two of them fall asleep

Kid only knows how to cry/to cry when he's upset because he saw Maka do it when they were young and now he's a pro. Because he only really LOOKS human a lot of human behavior doesn't come naturally for him so he learns from humans around him. He's much better at mimicking and adopting human behavior than Lord Death, which was LD's whole idea

He's shorter than Liz and Patty until he's about 20, then he's shorter than Liz but taller than Patty

Kid can pick up languages really easily. I think if he's immersed he can speak fluently after a couple hours

I've thought about a thing where individual people outside of Death City think he looks different than how anyone else sees him, like a sort of PJO Aphrodite situation but that may be too much of an identity crisis for him lol

There are no government records confirming Kid exists. The only document or ID he has is that little card from LD that says I'm LD's son I can do what I want and nobody questions it

Kid's human form ages normally until he's an adult but when he's mature his aging slows until it finally stops at some point, not sure when.. maybe around appearing 40?

he is gay and ace and has a very loose concept of gender

only Liz and Patty can touch his hair but only when they're at home

Kid and Maka are besties I don't make the rules. She is the only one he will allow to help with his detective work

Kid and Patty cannot be left unsupervised together or there will be some sort of chaos. they are scarily effective on duo missions, even though Kid doesn't use Patty as a weapon for those occasions

Kid doesn't need to sleep but he does if there are other people around (having Liz and Patty in the house helps) because it's refreshing and he read somewhere it helps build trust

Eyes glow in the dark and he can see fine in the dark

Kidstar:

They're about the same height but Black Star gets a growth spurt and is a few inches taller when they're adults

Kid figures out his feelings first (takes a bit rip) but doesn't do anything about them because he feels like he can't because of his responsibilities

^^ That being said I think Black Star has always been generally aware of his feelings for Kid but he doesn't actually put two and two together until literally the moment before he makes his move lol

I don't think they refer to the other as their boyfriend specifically (at least not often) they just sorta... idk man they're partners, they can't describe their relationship in words dont look at me i'm sobbing

first kiss in the rain lets go

majority of physical affection they do is like. hand holding or light touches on the shoulder or arm it is very special to them

more of a future thing (i got a whole future au so ofc i'll talk abt a future thing lol) i dont think they'd ever feel the need to get married bc they're both stubborn and they got all of eternity to be together and I think a lot of their relationship just generally remains unlabelled and unspoken it just IS

OH sort of ignoring my second kidstar hc I had a hc they got together sometime before the mission to the arctic but nobody except like. Killik knew

For funsies I'll throw in a couple of Black Star headcanons

Tsubaki is teaching him Japanese and how to cook

^^ he likes to cook for his friends even though he's not that good at it yet

Mom is Latina I have some stuff about her here. He starts to learn Spanish after he finds out about her

First partner and first kiss was Killik but they had a mutual and friendly break up

Somehow beats mortality while remaining human idk how he just does ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

That is all I can think of right now but I hope you enjoy :)

[mariatesstruther]

okay but a fic following tommy in jackson as he watches sarah’s look-alike grow up and have her baby. maybe he develops his own relationship with this girl and her kid, and it helps him deal with losing sarah??????? perhaps????? stay with me!

like we see how hard it was for joel to see her just once in 1x06. assuming tommy’s been in jackson for years, which i do, he has probably watched this young woman grow into an adult, getting struck with that pain of distant familiarity every single time he sees her. i imagine it would lowkey torture him until he truly confronts his grief over sarah and the life she could’ve lived

and imagine when she—im gonna name her kiara bc i hate when characters don’t have names—gets pregnant. tommy has to watch as kiara’s belly gets bigger and bigger, watch as the jackson community frets over her hand and foot because jackson takes extra special care of it’s pregnant residents, watch from the sidelines as kiara gets a future that sarah will never have while looking just like her

but THEN maybe he gets to know her a little bit???? maybe kiara knows he does housework and eventually asks maria if anyone can help fix-up and baby-proof her little two-bedroom house to prepare for the little one. maria knows tommy would be the perfect man for the job, but she also knows that he keeps careful distance from kiara on purpose

she sees the way his shoulders tense and his easy expression drops every time she’s in his line of sight. she saw how one time, when kiara had come over to talk to maria while she was sitting with him, tommy could barely handle looking at her up close: he ended up staring at his plate and clearing it—even the squash medley, which she knows he fucking hates—until he had reason to leave the hall completely.

but there truly is no one else she would rather help kiara; the only other person that does housework as good as tommy is fuckin jacob, and jacob is seth’s best friend, which means he’s a lowkey bigoted asshole that will only do “favors” for maria if he gets something in return. she, frankly, doesn’t want him anywhere near kiara. so maria still talks to tommy about it, and because he’s the most selfless loving man she’s ever met, he agrees. they talk about backup plans and what tommy should do if he gets too triggered—they’ve been working at distress tolerance and detecting when his mind is going fuzzy, so he knows to get straight to their home and wait for maria when it happens. privately, maria talks to kiara and tells her that tommy is still dealing with some stuff that triggers him and might need breaks once in ahwile; she knows to go get maria immediately if this happens

so tommy helps kiara out, and along the way they get to talking and being more friendly with each other. kiara reveals that she’s extremely nervous to be a mom, that she’s doing it alone (the asshole that was with her split jackson when he foundnout because men still be menning in their apocalypse). she tells tommy that she’s never been more scared to do anything in her whole life, and she lived alone as a young girl in FEDRA-run QZ

and suddenly, tommy realizes he has had almost this exact conversation before. with joel. he remembers standing by and watching joel freak out over baby-proofing their place, raving and ranting: how am i supposed to do this, tommy? we have too many fucking cabinets—look at all of these fucking cabinets! aye, im gonna ruin her. and tommy had been speechless in the face of all that fear. he knows how scared they both were, and he knows what he would’ve wanted to hear then, too. with the gift of time and wisdom, he finally knows what to say

so he comforts kiara, and by some miracle, it actually works. he tells her about joel raising sarah alone, and how terrifying it all seemed, right up until she actually got to them: he tells her how all that terror turned into love the moment he held that little ray of sunshine in his arms. he tells her about how sarah used to be what he and joel called a boo-boo magnet, constantly falling over and knocking into shit, always having bumps, scrapes, and bruises as a result. most importantly, he told kiara, she was always just fine: as long as she felt loved, sarah was always just fine. kiara’s baby would be just fine, too

and this convo changes kiara’s whole perspective, her whole vibe. tommy see’s the difference in her now, when he spots her in the dining hall or walking across town with a hand on her belly, tense with excitement instead of anxiety. he feels the difference in himself, too: he’s no longer struck with the abstract pain of remembrance as he sees her, now. he just feels honest friendship, true familiarity, and a rush of fond protectiveness for her that reminds him of the way he felt for sarah. it doesn’t hurt, or at least not the same way. it feels good, knowing kiara as kiara, not as the ghost of his niece. it feels right

she always makes sure to stop and talk to him when they cross paths, asking him about his work around town (or teasing him about he and maria, because at this point they’re trying to keep it lowkey but. kiara knows. talia knows. half of jackson suspects it and kiara wants the inside scoop okay so SPILL tommy just tell me!!!!!). somehow, tommy has developed a good relationship with the girl he thought he’d never have the guts to speak to

when kiara is on her last couple weeks of pregnancy, mostly bedridden and definitely ready to give birth, she asks tommy to stop by once every few days to have lunch or dinner with her. it always suprises him, but he always goes. they talk mostly about raising children: how different it seems to be post-2003, how scared kiara still is even despite her new confidence, how tumultuous sarah’s first few months were. he realizes, later, that he hasn’t talked about sarah this much to anyone but maria since she’s passed. he finds their conversations ease the ache in him more than avoiding kiara ever could’ve

when kiara has the baby, tommy accidentally becomes a quasi-godfather-uncle-grandparent without even having been asked. it’s clear that, from their time together, kiara is very fond of him—judging from the way her baby, kelsey, always settles down and stares at him in wonder whenever he’s around, it’s clear she likes him too. when kelsey becomes old enough to smile, she’s never ever around tommy without grinning and giggling, enamored by his silly face and silly voice and silly mustache, which she’s always trying to pull off. when kelsey becomes old enough to walk, kiara can’t bring her anywhere near tommy without the toddler trying her best to baby-sprint over to him. more than once, she’s fallen smack-down onto her face and gotten right back up, arms outstretched to tommy as she continues determinedly to toddle over. when kelsey becomes old enough to speak, she’s constantly calling for him and babbling to him when kiara finally brings her over. kelsey can’t even really pronounce her t’s until she’s three, so for awhile she calls tommy “mommy,” and kiara thinks it’s hilarious. she’s called mama anyway, so it doesn’t really matter to her that her baby calls this semi-random grown man mommy. everytime, it makes tommy want to simultaneously laugh and cry

by the time joel shows up, kelsey is six and not-so-obsessed with tommy anymore. her and kiara still join him and maria for dinner at least once a month, and kelsey has distant memories of calling tommy mommy, then uncle mommy, then finally naming him tim-tam-tommy when she turned four, the nickname for him that still stuck. he thinks about warning joel about her, when they talk in the bar, because he sure as hell could’ve used a goddamn warning—but the conversation goes left, so they never get there.

when joel sees kiara and kelsey for the first time, it’s hits him as hard as it once did tommy

tagging @ameerawrites because i feel like u always indulge in tommy trauma brainrot with me and @clickergossip bc this idea started on tommy day :)

[youremyheaven]

yes, Venusian men can be soo disrespectful to women they're not attracted to/aren't to their standards. They'll pick on physical features that nobody would even think of or notice like 'damnn her fingers are too long, yuck' or 'she smiles weirdly'. I'd know, not only is my partner Venusian but he's in a band and all of the boys in the band are Venusian in their 'big 3'. They're kinda respectful in a way, like they're not so brutish like other men and value connection more but they do talk soo much bs about girls looks.

but yes when they truly find a girl beautiful they'll be respectful af... still critical, like they'll give out of pocket lowkey offensive advice and stuff, but they treat you like a goddess in their mind. Simpy simp city.

Though I hate the whole 'I'm mean to everyone, but kind only to you because that's how much I care about you' shtick tbh, like I want a man who has a heart of gold and is kind to all women & children indiscriminately with no agenda ♡♡ 

Healthy Jupiterian men are more like that, buuut Jupiter men have their own genre of crazy going on hahaha

😭😭😭😭 you nailed it bbg

I've seen the way Venusian men are with other women 😳😳and it lowkey freaks me out bc one day if he loses his attraction to me, he'll also start treating me like everybody else 💀💀💀 and that's not a nice way to think of a potential partner

Like don't get me wrong, I love the goddess treatment 🤪🤪but I also 100% know that a Venusian man's love is very much deeply tied to their attraction to you. HOWEVER, I don't think their attraction is as shallow as others make it seem. They can be womanizers for sure but Venus men fall hard and become completely deranged for that one woman whom he exalts to a deity level and doesn't let go. She can walk out on him, humiliate him, reject him, betray him etc but they're tortured romantics who will love their idea of you, until the day they die. This is not healthy or nice 🙂

They could be on their death bed thinking of you as their one true love who got away when in reality they made crass jokes, acted vulgar and gave you the ick by drooling all over you.

Yeah a Venusian man in love is 😩😩😩 thank you God for giving me many opportunities to understand what that feels like 😭🤧but it's so intense and delusional, sometimes I can't stand it lmao 🤣

I truly believe that marriages only work if the man loves the woman more. Hence, my preference for Venusian men lmao 🤣💀

Idk if y'all have noticed but Venusian men think like women and pay attention to absolutely everything 😭😭 my last Venus tryst (my June talking stage lmao) spoke at length about everything he liked on me, from accessories to makeup to clothes 😭😭😭 I was like how on earth do you notice all that 😭😭 and he was just like 😊😊I appreciate femininity and beauty 😊😊he said he dreamt of helping his wife get dressed because he loved to watch 😹😹 and pick things out etc 😭😭

Even when they're not artists, they have an artistic flair. Like man's out here planning outfits from head to toe 😭😭😭 crazyyy

My ideal man is Venus + Jupiter + Mercury (only because it's my DK and I can't stand dumb men)

[idk-my-aesthetic]

Spy x Family Chapter 76 spoilers ahhh

Personally I like to think Twilight took the car from Franky bc he needed a car quick and now Franky walks to work in the rain everyday. Bc Franky is just a poor little meow meow and it’s funny in my head

We see more of TwiLoid’s reaction to the bus arc! I think it’s very in character for him to just be mentally spiraling about it a little bit lol. (So basically my fanfic was right even though my version was more angsty lol). Also Anya immediately taking advantage of him is A++

And I actually really appreciate that we see twilight specifically concerned about her mental health. Usually “Anya is surely traumatized” is kinda played for a joke but the joke isn’t that she’s not traumatized it’s usually that her behavior in that exact moment isn’t a product of trauma. So the little shout outs about mental health feel like something that is eventually going to be addressed and they’re almost saying “don’t worry we didn’t forget, we will address the mental health side when the time is right”

Anya is obviously traumatized and I love fanfic that focuses on all the little bad stuff that happens, but it makes sense from a narrative perspective that they literally Cannot focus on every single thing that happens to her. But it does look like we’ll be getting specific focus on the bus arc and I’m excited for what’s to come!

Also, something absolutely ironically heartbreaking about Yor and Loid scolding Anya for being reckless. They have no clue how often she purposely puts herself in very real danger to protect the people she cares about. Including them!! (Cont underneath)

Like from their perspective they’re probably like “Anya said some dumb shit bc she didn’t understand the situation and put herself in danger, that’s really scary bc she might say dumb shit again and get hurt. But at least she didn’t know how much danger she was in so she wasn’t scared”

But in REALITY anya DID know how much very real danger they were in, more than literally ANYONE else. She made a choice to talk to the villians to save herself but more importantly save the rest of the kids on the bus and her Papa.

She literally had the chance to get off the bus and refused to go to safety until literally everyone else was safe.

And Anya does this sort of thing all the freaking time. I think the only time she’s gotten into danger by being a dumb kid was the initial kidnapping. Basically every other time was not her fault or her willingly putting herself in danger to protect others, usually one of her parents, and usually Loid on top of that

There’s just something so heartbreaking to me about the fact that Anya puts herself into danger for her parents so often, which they obviously do not want her to do, but they usually don’t understand how much danger she is in or that they were in danger to begin with or that she put herself into danger to protect them. Like they have no clue she really single handedly saved the whole bus and Loid!! And they even scolded her for it bc they don’t know the truth!!!

Which like, as necessary as it is at times “put myself into danger to save everyone else” is not a healthy habit for Anya to be developing and the fact that it keeps working out makes me think she’s going to keep leaning into it to a dangerous degree

It’s also so so hard to be mad at her for putting herself in danger because she’s not being carelessly reckless like people think she’s making calculated decisions to protect the ppl she cares about. It creates this weird mix of like pride and frustration towards her as a character. Like stop playing with explosives small child holy shit!! But how can you be mad when she’s only playing with them bc no one else knows to turn them off :(

Basically I have alot of feelings about Anya Forger I think she deserves lots and lots of cake

On a slightly lighter note, when Anya is trying to seem cool she screws herself so much. She could’ve said “I was just trying to convince him to let everyone go” and everyone would’ve been enamored with her

Like. If she thought about it she could even say something about seeing the guy mumbling to himself about blowing up the secret police or something. She literally probably could’ve told basically the truth and won the day

Instead she gets in a petty fight with Damian. Which I 100% support, much more in character and fun lol, hopefully they didn’t get demerits for being late

One last note, Becky is an absolutely wonderful freind to Anya and deserves more credit

That’s it ty for reading have a nice night

[haleigh-sloth]

What are your thoughts on Hazbin? Also, fav song? 👀

Favorite songs: Stayed Gone, Loser Baby, Hell is Forever

But seriously all the music slaps hard. It’s so good.

Thoughts: many

I’ll start with the smaller thoughts and leave the longest (Alastor) for last.

Vaggie is pleasantly explored. I’m surprised in a good way. I also love Charlie and feel like her strength isn’t really on full display yet lol. Exciting.

Angel Dust—my son. Husk—my son in law.

Angel Dust and Husk—I didn’t catch the vibe the first watch through but the second time? Oh they’re gonna be in love later if they aren’t already. I rarely care about ships but I LOVE this one. Good job Hazbin.

I really do like the Vees. They’re clearly antagonists and represent negative effects of social media and technology influence among other things. I mean no they aren’t likable as people, but I certainly like them as characters. I’m excited to see them more.

Everyone else is just fun. I love the found family/home vibe of the hotel. It’s so comforting to me.

Now really, my favorite is Alastor. Shocking I know.

Currently I can’t take my focus off of him. My gut told me he’s a good character to latch onto, and I feel like my gut was right.

I always want a happy ending for my blorbos and I feel like I hit the jack pot here bc he seems like a chaotic “control the game board” type of character (like Izaya, Shigure, Mephisto, etc.). But I think he’s ultimately going to be a benevolent force in the story for what the story is showing (redemption and salvation!).

I’m obsessed with his relationship to Charlie the most, but also I’m just very honed in on how his attachment to the hotel will change throughout the series.

Alastor is hard to read. He’s just a fun little guy. He seems sadistic and uncaring. Emotionless and like an overlord with pretty much no other motive besides power and freedom (regaining what he had before his fight with Vox 7 years ago is what his surface level motive seems to be).

But I cannot take my eyes off of how he’s puts a lot of effort into Charlie and what she wants.

In the pilot he says it’s for shits and giggles, and I’m sure he tells himself it is. But the way he is in the main series (meaning after the pilot) is just very questionable when you remember what he said his motive was. He does a whole lot more than someone who doesn’t actually give a shit.

Sure, it’s nothing for him to defend the hotel really. A mindless chore. But I started getting like ???? when Lucifer showed up. Lucifer clearly bothers Alastor (the frame was deliberately showing Alastor’s eye twitch when Lucifer showed up at the hotel and hugged his daughter). Then of course there was the hilarious “I’m a better dad than him” bit that made me lose my mind. Then in the second to last episode Alastor said “it’s not like you’ve ever failed to inspire before”—obviously meaning himself, has me even more like ???!!!! Something about Charlie inspires him and gets him up and moving and I just love that and want to explore it more and see what that brings for him.

The finale episode shows him starting to crack. He laughs at the thought of almost dying for his friends—the notion hilarious to him. Except he DID ALMOST DIE FOR HIS “FRIENDS”. And I think the reality of that freaks him out. I don’t think he’s very in tune with how he really feels about the company he has right now. Not yet. I really do think right now he’s focused on revenge against Vox, bc he’s openly competitive against him and clearly has a vendetta. I think that clouds everything else with him right now and it’ll be a problem later.

I’ve also gotta give it to a couple of other pals who basically confirmed for me that Alastor’s character is heading for redemption. The kind of redemption the hotel aims for (whether that ends with a place in heaven or not idk or care bc I just want him to have a happy ending with everyone). He doesn’t know this, or acknowledge this. But Charlie’s influence is contagious and Alastor is already infected by it a little. It’ll become more obvious later I think as everyone else around Charlie finds love and happiness in the hotel. We’re already seeing it with Angel and Husk and we saw it with Sir Pentious. Alastor won’t be immune from this I’m sure. Which is what I’m the most excited for. I want to see that man change—and he already is but I want to see more. I can see Alastor accepting salvation/redemption as a major obstacle or barrier and probably something very important for Charlie to accomplish, but I think it’ll be one of the best things in the series too.

Alastor is clearly the creator’s baby. He’s obviously the most complex and has the most going on internally. She’s said he’s existed since she was in high school. He’s important to her and important to the show and I can tell the show will take good care of him. I’m very, very excited for it.

I haven’t felt this excited about something in a while so it’s nice and refreshing. I love the show as a whole but I’m so down for Alastor and his arc. I don’t think I’ll be disappointed.

[salaapaoo]

PECULIAR QUESTION

Have you ever read any soulmate fics that have their deepest, darkest thoughts about themselves written on their soulmate's body? And when they finally begin to think differently the writing turns gold?

What do you think Cale's soulmate would have?(I know my boi is traumatized as f u c k-)

Maybe you could make it found family somehow where the thoughts are split up between people and they haven't figured out which set of writing belongs to Cale-

but I really want to know what everyone else would think- like, there would probably be some horrifying crap there.

(would a majority of the writing on Cale be golden already-? [Like obviously not ALL of it but still-])

Sorry, I rambled a bit there 😅

I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS SO HARD !!! I DIDN'T FORGET THIS!!

my brain is kinda fried after finishing my finals, but!! I feel like Cale's would end up being smth kinda vague like "it should have been me." Orrrr smth about not deserving everything ??

Like yes... It's p straight forward, but imagine how they'd feel after learning about his past?? IF he opens up??

But also... Imagine the soulmate thing kinda doubles as healing..? If that makes sense? Just think about it... If one person believes something about themselves, but their soulmate is the only person who is able to help them heal themselves??

Nono!!! Keep going !!! I honestly haven't thought too much about the word soulmate aus 🤔 I had a moment where I was obsessed w like found family, and each person unlocking a colour for him (each person bringing a new colour into his world) or red string of fate (I had smth abt ws X Cale but tragedy??)

So ... I am , THIBKING SO HARD!!!

just ?? Imagine the kids?? Them having something seemingly simple like "I'm too weak" or smth about being "unwanted freaks" and then comes Cale...

Who gives them as much love as they need, patiently listening to them and letting them be kids.. ugh!!! Just?? They feel so safe with him and he helps quiet these negative thoughts so easily?

To others it might be obvious, but to them these "small" problems are massive boulders in their way... And the way Cale reassures them... It's so natural. No hesitation. Ugh I love them .

Just imagine if they appear w a searing pain? Or maybe for Cale, it feels the same as papercuts... Imagine the guilt he feels when his thoughts show up on the people he cares about... And it's just a cycle of self loathing.. where he thinks they would have been better off without him and then it shows up-

Uughgh... Just picturing him hating himself for the pain he brought to the kids because of his thoughts ...

NGL I read this wrong the first time BC I am, usually sleep deprived but like I thought it was like a lie. Like imagine someone having "living is best" show up on them but it's because Cale repeated it so much it became like a curse? He lived by those words because if he didn't then he wouldn't be able to keep going maybe?

Idk if I'm making sense anymore fjdkkfdkg

"I should have died" seems .. very likely for my brain

But if it's smth where it turns gold when they stop believing it... Imagine them all telling him he was meant to live and he just smiles and nods .. and it stays??

-

As for recommendations 🤔🤔 there was this one fic that was ogchch, soul mark au, forced cohabitation and I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!! I think I'm gonna go back and read it again

Come back anon 🥺🥺🥺 open Ur brain up n feed me Ur thoughts 🙏💖 I hope you enjoy this a bit 👉👈

[hongism]

hi sooo....

O______O wow...

U DID IT AGAINNNNNNN, im so.. im so shocked reading the new moc chapter and must i say i love ur interim chapters i think theyre so !!!!!!!!!! chefs kiss truly

okokok so im speechless.. but im thinking abt it now and ... (maybe this is also bc i recently jus binged like all of moc in like 3 days so its still fresh on my brain but) the very first chapters when mc was alr on the ship and and there was that one bit with san and they spent the night together and were talking and it was when she still was carrying around the pardon papers and they had like a heart to heart to be there for each other and the cheek kiss !!!!!! if im remembering right.. i remember sans reaction being written kinda awkward initially (ill have to eventually go back and find it) so it- it makes me wonder how fast hongjoong tried to come up w a plan to manipulate mc... also... my heartbroke even reading the prev chapter when mc was crying and telling san "why did u have to make me doubt ur feelings?" and then reading this chapter- i have hope for them i really do but i fear.. whats gonna happen once she finds the truth out bc... ik she will </3 and i fear its gonna be hongjoong.. But also..??? WAIT NO BC IM THINKING 80 MILLION THINGS RN.

THE DIALOGUE W MINGI........ MINGI AND MINHO..... minho being shocked that his intelligence is more than he lets on.... ITS MAKING ME WONDER LIKE... theyve all kinda treated mingi like Oh he's helpless or struggling rather, we need to care for him diligently-which is true, bro got demons fr but... then im wondering how much mingi really knows bc...?? i remember mingi saying smth to mc too about like "ask urself why it is that ur even trying to disobey in the first place?" or like idk they had that deep ass talk and.... idk.. im thinking abt it now though... what does mingi know.......

im also wondering... 1) if joong has a conscious LOL 2) no i definitely think he does after this but,,,,,,,,, we still dunno WHY he's become this way- why his demons are like this/why theyre presented this way bc in a way (LOL ME TRYNNA PSYCHOANALYZE HIM)... it seems like he keeps everyone at an arms length... except seonghwa i feel like.. at least for now.. but i saw that because he keeps to himself a lot even amongst the ship- so it seems... but he definitely changes the way he wants to come across people... 3) idk if i wanna hug him and tell him its gonna be alright or if i wanna box him LMFAOOO he is so damn crazy... and then jus the way minho described the way they played chess... everyone else doing his dealing... actually now that im thinking about it.. he's been called out quite easily before... so maybe he isnt as hard to read as he thought... in fact ik mc has been the one to call him out hella on his shit so.. i wonder if thats why he's so adamant on keeping her in shape.... oh joong ... babes what did u go thru 🤣🤣🤣🙁🙁🙁 u lil control freak u~~

anywho.. im also confused.... bc i can see that mc does wanna be approved and accepted (?) by joong yet also cant stand the authority he gives so its quite the paradox.........

rn im jus ranting sm... its like everythings clicking..

but also.. im curious.. hongjoong has only lost chess to yeosang among all the members... yet.. seonghwa is the lit. which ofc im gonna assume its also him being a siren that like he said "the closer he is to me the better".. but then if yeosang thought most like joong... why is yeosang just a pawn in joongs eyes ...? yeosang losing the wooyoung </3 lordddd i dont even wanna start... then minho saying he's excited to see how another crew member plays.. joong immediately thinking seonghwa... but interestingly enough im guessing its either san or yunho.. but my best bet is san given he's like another right hand man kinda guy to joong...

ill conclude on that note since its 3am rn... but wow U DID IT AGAINNNNN i love ur writing so much seriously <33333 thank u thank u thank u and im excited for more x

hi hehe :3 i'm so thrilled that you enjoy the interims that's such a relief and so nice to hear ;-;;

you're in the perfect position bc you remember what happened early on and can pick up on the crumbs i was dropping to make it alllll come full circle! what goes around comes around! not only are hongjoong's plans important to consider (ie when he implemented them, when he put them into action) but also both how san carried out his initial duty and when san started to slip away from that duty into something genuine! both those things will be explored and opened up in san's upcoming interim, that will help pull all the pieces together i hope so!! that scene with mc crying to san,,, i cried writing it and i know it made a lot of people doubt san and his feelings but!! please have hope!! there are SOOO many possibilities!! will hongjoong really leave san to lie in the grave he dug for himself or will he dig it deeper or try to help him out…? all remains to be seen :3

mingi is truly truly such a fun and fascinating character to both write and unveil to you guys ;-; he's exceptionally intelligent beyond the scope of understanding emotions period but he gets treated like he's dumber because he doesn't understand emotions bc in the others' eyes emotions are just simple and easy to understand. mingi def possesses a different kind of intelligence but that kind of intelligence is on the same level of yeosang iw ould say! so it's easiest to think of it as mingi has a different kind of smartness compared to someone like say,,,,jongho or san who both have very good and high emotional intelligence!

1) DOES the man have a conscience? this interim is very telling in that regard and his thought process and the what some would call "intrusive thoughts" really showcase who he is as a person!

2) there are so many layers to him and you really get it bc he does keep everyone at arms length, even seonghwa to some degree bc the whole reason him and seonghwa aren't together is bc hongjoong shut him down the moment seonghwa started expressing his feelings towards hongjoong, he likes to keep to himself and doesn't like to leave his space for many reasons but we now know that one of those reasons is the past feelings of failure and loss coming back to haunt him, and bingo right on the money, he changes the way he wants to come across to people. prime example in yunho at the end of the interim, i think that scene is the absolute best showcase of hongjoong's character and who he is and how he operates.

3) he is DAMN CRAZY!!! i feel like i haven't so much shown that to the degrees that his character really is batshit insane so we're tiptoeing into those waters more now. you do have to think though, with the notion that he changes the way he wants to come across to people, when he's being "called out", is it accurate? or is it what hongjoong is presenting so they think they know what kind of person he is? when mc calls him out on his shit, it's often a two way punch where it as much about her as it is about him so much to think about! he's far far beyond a control freak tehe :3

the fun paradox in mc is that dynamic of wanting to be approved and accepted by him but also having this point blank issue with authority and also how hongjoong excises his authority. and that's been a big point of confusion too i think so im trying to delve more into it and expose more of it so that it makes more sense but there is meant to be a contradiction in her actions for sure

yeosang has been the only one to beat hj at chess, and he is not the lieutenant. we know that hongjoong personally selected seonghwa before yeosang joined the crew and that the position has never swayed, and we also know that yeosang is the master strategist on the crew, which is something a lieutenant would usually take care of so it lends to some questions about how hongjoong views authority in his crew? as far as the chess game goes, his queen was indeed seonghwa, the main bishop he used to both attack and sabotage his own pieces was san, he himself was king, then though not as heavily touched on, the other pieces i had in mind were: mingi and jongho were both knights, yeosang was the other bishop, then mc, wooyoung, and yunho were pawns. who minho was really referring to ;) is quite the twist but a fun one :3

bless you for sending me such a long ask at such a late hour you're so sweet ;-; it made my day i was so happy and excited seeing it thank you for letting me ramble right back at you :3 <3

[golbrocklovely]

so this video was interesting to me for a lot of reasons. i definitely liked it more, i think, than tommy and foolish's but i think that's also bc so much more happened.

first off, i think the girls did excellent for their first investigation. they weren't too freaked out, even tho they had every right to be, and i liked their overall presence in the video. they seem pretty cool :)

now… as for the place they went to….

ngl, it seemed a bit freaky, for sure. i'm a little confused how all of the documentation of a place can be burned and yet ppl still know everything about it, but i digress lol

god knows there's probably some stuff that slipped thru the cracks and found it's way into history books.

i think the main issue i had with this video is the lack of physical evidence. i'm not one to discount other ppl's experiences. i believe them all when they say they felt something was there, or was watching them, or they saw something that the camera didn't catch. i'm not gonna argue that.

what i am gonna argue is this: if you truly feel like you are hearing things when no one else is, feeling touched or pressure on your body…. leave. step outside and center yourself. and if it seems to be a reoccurring issue, don't stay there. i feel terrible for niki bc she was getting the worse of it. but girl… walk outside. there's no way i would be chilling in a set of caves allowing ghosts to cop a feel for an hour lol i would be such a bitch about it, they would want me out of those caves asap.

but she's nicer than me so i get why she stayed.

i just feel like in places like that, where it's mostly feelings rather than evidence like devices going off, it becomes an echo chamber. one person freaks out, and bc you care about them, you start freaking out as well. and so on and so forth. and i think that's why investigations that take place in those type of locations, you need to have some form of grounding exercise or something that can center you. and not just being saged outside before walking in.

i always carry or have on two crystal necklaces that i've had for years now. i don't even know if they're real crystals, but bc they make me feel at peace, i make sure to always have them with me regardless. and i think bc none of them had anything like that, things spiraled very fast.

hell, i usually have my crystals on when i do tarot, let alone if i went into a place like this.

i don't fault any of them (except maybe snc bc they should know better by now) for not knowing what to do in situations like this. i can only imagine how fucking weird it must have felt.

the only point i want to argue is that when they were talking about "oh i feel this pressure on my chest, like it's hard to breathe"…. you're hundreds of feet down in the earth. that's gonna happen. the air in the caves is probably from the 1800s. literally body juice (ew) is leaking into the caves. it's not the healthiest air down there.

but aside from all of that, i think the video was really good. the estes methods were both interesting and creepy all at the same time. i hate when colby did the estes method and it was all sexual and pervy… no thanks. i also DESPISE that colby went into a trance for a minute when they went down into the lowest part, or hell. absolutely FUCK NO BABYYYY lol

i think the medium/guide they had was an interesting character, and i feel bad that she felt so emotional towards whatever was following them. also, it was very weird to see something want to attack colby, bc that usually happens to sam. so… i wonder why that was the case. but i have an idea as to why that happened (i'm gonna be answering an ask that talks about it in case you want to know).

overall, great video. enjoyed the collab. maybe if snc are in the uk again, they can collab with niki and gee. can't wait for the next video, which should be daz !

let me know what you guys thought about the video :)

[monstertidbits]

FINE. what would the dungeon meshi protagonists be like to on a chaste first date with. coward

the one night stand one was funnier but let's do this mf.

laios - i hope you told him that it is, in fact, a date or else he's just happy to hang out not assuming shit okay. he actually takes you into the dungeon because there's a really unique spot on the second floor that was discovered recently and he wanted to show you around. he's really sweet and excited to have you there and explains all sorts of stuff during your little adventure. you eagerly listen wanting to learn more, of course, though you start worrying it's more about indulging himself than actually getting to know you. but then you reach the "spot" he was talking about and you are entranced: it's the hollow of one of the bigger trees, but the space inside of it is unnaturally wide and vast, filled with dryad buds and fruits (if you freak out bc of this you dont deserve him. its beautiful). while you are still too stunned to speak, laios already starts unpacking his bag to reveal a little picnic he organized. he invites you to sit next to him while cutting a loaf of bread for you to eat. it's a comfortable first date, you two filling the hollow with excitable chatter for much longer than you were expecting. he really is easy to talk to, and it's pretty attractive how he seems to be confident and in his element within the dungeon, while others are so tense and out of place. on the way back you find your hand in his, not really thinking about it. laios, on the other hand (hahaha🤪), was cool up to this point but he kinda freaks out internally because he ain't sure if it's a sign things are going well. at least you know this is the beginning of something special.

marcille - she would be sooo funny. like she would be extremely nervous and trying too hard to leave a good impression so she becomes hyperaware of everything she does and says. you try your best to lighten the mood and talk about yourself a little more, so she would feel less tense. you suggest going around the main street because you're new in town, and that makes marcille come back to her senses- she knows all the popular spots and even the more niche and cool places there. just being useful puts her at ease, and it's fun following her around. the converstion greatly improves and she suggests a nice restaurant to eat dinner at. at this point you really don't care- there's something about her being self assured and leading the way that's so captivating. the rest of the night goes on smoothly, besides the fact marcille spilt your drink on you, which she kept profusely apologizing for til you parted ways. next time will surely be better, as you get to know each other more.

senshi - this is the only man you can trust when he invites you to cook dinner at his place on the first date. you arrive, not really knowing what to expect, and you are pleasantly surprised to see ingredients already laid out for you to start working. senshi takes the lead, explaining every step while making conversation. he is soft with his words and very calm, and at some point you find yourself thinking "how the hell did we reach this topic and why does it feel safe to openly talk about it" and you wish it would never stop. by the end of the date, your stomach full, you are pretty damn sure he's the man of your dreams or something. it doesn't get any better than him

chilchuck - he's married bitch.

[hirokiyuu]

sols roundup masterpost

i mentioned i was reworking the original post on my ao3 and so here it is! please note that a) there are a LOT of spoilers under the cut  (guy who has 80+ hours and multiple multiple endings) and b) there’s a lot of ways to take sol and these are just me having fun with them, if u dont like thats fine but dont tell me i don’t care. lol. also worth noting i think time loops are most fun when they subtly influence each other so there’s a lot of that in here LOL

worth noting i think theres a few traits that are pretty universal to them? wants to do right and full of love are the big two, tho curiosity, (seeming) warmth, and ability to fit in w/those around them are also pretty important tho i think more flexible. its just fun the way various sols can have those traits like.... manifest? an alien-hater sol who goes hunting all the time is just as valid as a sol dating dys that wants to end the war. just different ppl they love and different experiences. its fun

with that. onto the Meat

1) solana (she/her (demi?)girl, loyalty leaning lawyer, neutral end)

baby’s first run! outwardly warm but pretty cold inside. hypercompetent everywhere except in her love life. fell for tang when they were like nine on the ship and just sort of, never stopped, feeling that way, including when she was 100 years old and had outlived tang by nearly forty years, partially bc fixating on tang as people were dying was kind of. the only solace she had. wouldve really benefited from a good therapist.

2) solanaceae (he/him tguy, governor, peace ending)

childhood optimist with a hero complex turned "realist” but actually-exactly-the-same-just-depressed-about-it adult. saves tammy and tonin and hal! cannot save his parents :) grows a little distant from most of the people around him as a result, except dys, who Gets it. avoids tang for pretty much no reason he can understand, just has a sense of She Will Hurt You If You Get Too Close when he sees her sometimes. becomes governor solely bc he wants to save people. the kind of person you can trust in your house with your keys and your valuables and then someone asks ‘hey whats his favorite color’ and youre like. i dont. actually know

3) solane (they/them nb, gardener ending)

manic overconfident freak. definitely a ‘i wont tell people about my dreams bc it’s like i’m a HERO this way!’ type. saves everyone and extremely proud about it. coasting through life from ages 14-19 until they go find dys after the bomb has gone off and he’s dating. someone else? which makes them freak out bc THEYRE the hero. so instead of being normal about this they become a gardener in a desperate attempt not to be left behind

It’s Bad!

4) solanaceae (he/him cisguy, colonial hero, neutral ending) x / x

this is the one ive been referring to in private as “fascist manwhore sol” and honestly. yeah. just as overconfident as the last but extremely charming about it. the kind of guy you kinda wanna hit but also can’t help but like? somehow manages to be close w/most everyone in the colony despite their various opinions. really really hates the gardeners + even sym, for some reason w/in himself that he can’t explain. 

in Love with dys for most of their lives but cant ever make it work, fwb with rex, dates vace despite having matching tattoos with his ex-gf. hes just that kind of guy. dies young and a hero, less than a year after dys disappears into the ridges. dont think abt it too hard.

5) solane (she/her nb, neutral end, roboticist on accident somehow but a social skills job wouldve fit much better)

if third sol Thinks theyre god this sol like. actually Is. extremely clear dreams, used to talk abt them pretty much always until her first trip to medbay, at which point she stopped ever letting adults know. kind of existentially exhausted as a result. using this life literally just as a coffeeshop au lol. poly but also probably aromantic; open rship w/rex, who they love a lot but no more so than literally any of their other friends. pretty happy with stuff! 

until they go to see dys off when he “vanishes” from the colony and they accidentally let it drop they couldve like. ended the whole war. he’s. displeased. they still make an effort to enjoy the rest of their life but when they die theyre thinking abt how they should try to be a better person next time. and also hoping they remember less.

6) solanaceae (genderfluid but generally refers to self as a lesbian, peace end, botanist) x

cheerful heroine! desperately wants to be normal and tries so so hard to ignore her dreams, which works kind of, right up until they very purposefully ignores the one abt tammy and tammy dies immediately after :) at which point they completely switches gears and uses their dreams to try and save Everyone they can. bffs with nem since childhood & into her pretty much Always. everyone’s friend! dies content and at peace.

interestingly, bc this is the route where i got paradox ending on a save, probably the sol closest to the wormhole + everything about it, despite not actually remembering much from his dreams. it manifests in other ways. lol.

7) solane (she/her cisgirl, neutral end, roboticist)

coward who can only be brave when it’s for the sake of the people she loves, most notably tammy who she actually dislikes until she saves her life, at which point she realizes maybe she Can be a hero too. better with robots than people, spent most of her childhood following cal around bc he was one of hte only ppl to make time for her. falls madly in love w/tammy; their family is her biggest joy. a good parent.

8) solanaceae (he/him agender, neutral end, doctor)

feral intense child who becomes a terrifying eagle-eyed doctor. max perception by age eleven, somehow. STRONG sense of justice. strongest belief is “if you ignore someone you couldve saved, you’re garbage.” not quite high enough friendship w/nem to convince her to leave vace as teens; helps her later on when theyre adults. years and years later after dys “dies” they end up moving in and spend the rest of their lives together.

9) solanaceae (they/them nb, peace end, entertainer)

awkward ace kid who always speaks their mind. accidentally destroys tammy’s confidence every time they talk. gets confessed to by both marz and rex, shoots them down extremely awkwardly due to both aforementioned asexuality and the fact theyve had a crush on dys since they were thirteen. takes their promise to let him go seriously to the point that when he tries to bomb hte colony, they let him, and when he wants to be a gardener, they don’t stand in his way. is alright with this at first but slowly begins to feel lonelier and lonelier about it as time passes, and when they die and realize they won’t actually be with him again they feel. Very Bad. pass on wishing they’d not let him go but resenting him for asking to.

10) solane (she/her cisgirl, neutral end, xeno wrangler)

ive been calling this one “cuckoo bird sol” for a reason. desperately wants someone to be devoted to Her and Her Alone who Won’t Leave, and feels like. cal is good for that. doesn’t like tammy as a result, which means that when she has a nightmare abt tammy dying she doesn't even care, it’s not like its REAL. yeah. It’s Bad! she feels guilty abt it and then feels bad bc she’s also happy bc cal spends more time with her but also she does sure feel like shes competing against a dead girl huh! so! that’s fun!

eventually she does work her shit out and realize she does like cal himself and does want kids on her own terms but like. the process of getting there! one fucked up kid. dies more content than she realized she could be, glad for her family.

11) solanaceae (she/her nb leaning, peace end, parent) x

rowdy. her heart is 80% love and 20% pure unadulterated rage. unaugmented, which she personally doesnt care abt, but she sure does get pissed off at ppl trying to be soooo nice to her abt it! too busy w/sfc stuff during wet and as such completely misses her chance to talk dys out of the bomb. when she finds him on the ridges afterwards they yell at each other abt being in love w/each other for forever and she manages to drag him back home.

in some ways this would be my “golden run” (full friendship with everyone) (jesus christ) but despite that her actual bffs besides dys are tammy and (unfortunately) vace. in another world i would retcon this to ot3 but in this one she kissed sym and then he died in front of her and despite herself she kind of cant stop flinching away from him now if he tries to make a move. they do hinge poly instead it works. has a boatload of kids and never augments any of them. dies exhausted and delighted and in love w/the world. 

12) solane (he/him cisguy, peace ending, parent oops)

delusion run! sol who cant stop talking abt his delusions even when he knows he should. pursues dys in the “we were In Love before so we will be again!” way not the “i like you!” way until he gets. y’know. lobotomized. in some ways not focusing on his dreams is good for him but also he loses a lot of his personality? focus? afterwards

teases tammy relentlessly but ends up falling for her but bc for some reason this run glitched and tammy’s pregnancy just. kept going. she never had the kid? so i didnt date her even tho he wouldve lol. tbh most of th ending for this one is what id consider noncanon for him but ill retcon it later when i have more Vibes in place

13) solanaceae (they/he, peace ending, astronaut) this is a dead dove run (mentions of abuse)

unlucky number thirteen :) sol coming out of a delusion run with the creeping sense that they should not trust Anyone with their secrets. a little disconnected from the ppl around them tho they get on well enough w/dys and tang. madly in love with the wormhole. desperate to get off the planet and back into space so they can see it, a sentiment no one shares until, y’know. vace.

in Love (lol) with him after his 50. first time theyve ever met anyone they think Gets them so they enable him. fucking crushed when he starts dating nem. when he offers to cheat they take him up on it, which means he learns nothing and they lose one of their childhood friends :) eventually they go into space together just like they wanted! it’s bad! die in the wormhole and i think thats the first time they ever truly, from the bottom of their heart, regret everything. never want to fall in love again.

14) sol (no pronouns whenever possible but sort of ok w/they, peace ending, farmer) warning for abuse mentions in this one as well

sometimes you get so badly abused in one life your next life it still affects you! kind of an odd child, gets along better w/congruence than the other kids but thinks of cal is like a brother. doing ok until helios lands and then it’s like. h

avoids vace like the plague, despises/is afraid of him but doesn’t realize why until after sol starts understanding dreams more. when he dies i think sol wants to be like Good Riddance but. cant fully. approaches rex bc sol want to know What’s Up With The Whole Rex+Vace Deal, end up falling pretty hard. dating sym also, the three of them living together is an Experience i think. dies full of Love.

15) solana (he/him tguy, peace end, athlete)

rambunctious! cheerful! kind of dumb! falls in love w/cal from a young age and is convinced they’re gonna grow up and get married and is subsequently crushed when cal starts dating tammy instead esp bc. cal sort of. lead them on a bit w/it. slowly falls in love w/dys in the aftermath.

a bit immature. plays sportsball even in the middle of war, tension with both cal And nem as a result despite still being their bffs. he and nem are on opposite sportsball teams for the rest of their lives and yet go out for drinks after constantly. she’s his sister, basically! dies pretty happy w/how things turned out

16) solanaceae (she/they, neutral end, merchant)

greedy greedy greedy. wants money and love and attention, time and people and things, everyhting you can think of she wants it. she marz and tang are the Terrible WLW Trio of Girls Who Might Be Dating. bit of a soft spot for dys she can’t quite rationalize, will be kind to him when she’s not to anyone else. fond of rex as well.

she and marz flirt by flirting with tang, aka the person she Actually likes. pretty happy when they finally hook up, but isn’t devastated by the breakup as much as she is.... left hollow. another mistake on top of everyhting else (capitalism, dys vanishing, girl shes liked forever dumping her, also theres maybe a fleet from earth coming but haha dw abt it) she tells rex abt the fleet maybe a year? before it shows up. dies wishing desperately she had been able to be kinder.

17) solana (he/him tguy, peace end, professor) x

sugary sweet! childhood friends with tammy, they’re v similar people. loves her a lot, cannot wait to be best man at her wedding to cal LOL. despite his gentle demeanor he is also absolutely the kind of guy to do Whatever It Takes for the ppl he loves (ie poisons uncle tonin to keep him alive LOL)

thinks nomi is like, the coolest person in the universe when they meet bc they can MAKE things. so so stupid about them. when they start dating its embarrassing for everyone but they are so happy together no one can actually say anything. dies happy but wishing he was more confident in himself/brave

aaaaaaaaanyways that’s the current list. for Now. there may be more coming. i have offshoots of some of these as well that may or may not pop up wwww generally for fic that isn’t set with a specific sol i tend towards an nb sol closest to personality+dreams to my sixth sol? cheerful and trying to help but also Just A Kid about it!

[idealisticrealism]

TCL 2x01 recap

So I have many (many) thoughts about this show, and this season @enigmaticfox​ convinced me that instead of just bombarding her with them, I should post them here lol. So I hope that you guys enjoy my insane TCL spiralling, and feel free to respond to any of it if that takes your fancy lol

Firstly I loved that we got our usual cool cleaning montage set to badass music (aka the thing that is frequently used to represent Thony) and it turned out to be Arman instead?? I mean, he's cleaning, she's breaking the law-- what's that they say about couples who take part in each other's interests?? Lol. Though tbh I should have immediately guessed it was him in the montage bc the music was Spanish, duh 

Hayak's comment about laundry was interesting, and given how he repairs all their trucks too I want to know more about his backstory. Why doesn't he respect Arman when it seems he also came from a working class background? Maybe because he feels he pulled himself up and yet Arman only rose with his help?

I feel it’s necessary to mention that Arman IS SO FUCKING PRETTY.  

But maybe not super smart rn?? "I'll be running things in no time", like careful with your words there Arman, geez.  Also him calling her The Cleaning Lady was kind of hot lol.  It's like her superhero secret identity, or assassin name or something

(Okay where is this goddamn house???? Give me more landmarks, show!! I need to find this filming location dammit)

As much as I love Armony,  Thony and Fi are the real central relationship of this show imo. Their scenes in this ep were hard to watch but so good ugh. And ugh Thony saying she and Luca belong with Fi and the kids makes me so happy (though lbr there's also someone else on her mind as well as she says this....)

It drives me nuts that I know exactly where this FBI building filming location is but I couldn't take photos in these spots lol

(Skips past garrett whining about his mistress)

"Nothing's going to happen to Marco" the moment I figured he was probably gonna die lol

Ok I'm used to Nadia and Arman arguing in Spanish but holy shit them talking all low and tenderly is actually really hot lol

Arman immediately defending Thony and making it clear that he trusts her is what I live for ugh. (Also, Nadia telling him he trusts people too much could be clever foreshadowing of her eventually betraying him late in the season, but I really hope not). But ugh his unhappy little face when she says Thony could be going to the airport-- reminds me of his wounded look in 1x03 :P

Also the cut between that line and Thony actually being at the airport was hilarious lol.  Plus I love that I know exactly the spot they filmed the airport stuff in, I went into that hallway to go to the bathroom haha

Sigh Bash and Tino are growing too fast :(

God this was such inefficient searching by Thony and Garrett.  He was RIGHT THERE

Lol very awkward to try to explain to Garrett why she doesn't want to leave the country where she’s an illegal immigrant.... also lol at her answering his statement that she’s still involved with Arman with "Arman's in jail". That means literally nothing Thony and you both know it?? Honestly her and Arman tying themselves in knots trying to find a believable explanation to give others about their connection is one of my favourite recurring themes in the show lol  

I oddly loved hearing Nadia say "dammit, Thony"-- it gives the sense that they are getting closer in a weird way lol

Good job Chris dropping some truth bombs about marco being shit haha

Dude this Armony phone conversation is actually kind of hilarious when you realise that their whole "I guess I'm going to have to stay" hand-holding eye-lovemaking moment was literally yesterday, but her ignoring Nadia's calls has got him so freaked out that she's somehow changed her mind that he's now like 100x more desperate to get out of prison than he was just the day before haha

But oh god this phone call. Like seriously I'm forever in love with the pause and the shift of tone/sincere appeal in his "what's going on?", and then her trying to dismiss it with a sigh and a "nothing" bc she doesn't want to add to his burdens/ is so used to dealing with stuff on her own, but when he gives her even just one nudge to open up to him, she immediately tells him the truth. And ugh the clear  agitation in his voice when he prompts "but what??" when she says Marco tried to take Luca on the plane. He needs to know if Thony really is about to get on a plane to chase after Luca.  And then when he tells her he wishes he could be there to help her, it has that same rasp of emotion to it that was there in the 1x09 call, clearly responding to the fact she herself sounds close to tears. And THEN she says "I know you do" all gently like that???? Help???? And he asks her what she'll do now, almost like a do-over of yesterday, because he needs to know if her answer-- her plan to stay-- has changed.  It's only after she mentions Garrett that he hardens again, clearly feeling jealous and replaceable (hence his commence about her not needing his help anymore), and then he orders her to call Nadia because "I need to get the hell out of here". Very telling that he's suddenly so desperate to be out, especially considering that at this point he thinks he's safe from Hayak for now, so it's clear that his desperation (whether consciously or not) has more to do with needing to be back on the playing board where he can be of worth to Thony again.  And ugh Thony looks so sad when they hang up and I choose to interpret that as her wishing he was there with her rather than them being forcibly separated to both deal with things alone ugghhhh

(Super curious to know what, if anything, she said in response to him saying she didn't need his help anymore. Maybe nothing, or maybe she started to say something but he unintentionally cut her off when he spoke again, but ugh I bet she was definitely at least thinking how wrong he was)

Anyhow lollll at Arman's face when he discovers that the visitor that caused his call with Thony to get cut short and end on a tense note was Garrett.  He really hates this guy and it's not just because he double-crossed him and put him in prison. Of course it's partly that-- mainly because prison is keeping him from thony-- but he really hates that Garrett now gets to be the one she turns to when she needs help, the one who is there for her and there with her. But oh my precious boy you are so blind if you think that Thony would ever willingly go to Garrett if she had any other choice lol 

I feel like Fi saying Marco took Luca because of something going on between Thony and Arman– while not necessarily wrong– was pretty damn unfair? Like way to victim-blame there Fi (and lol I already posted a whole meta about this so I’ll leave it at that)

Honestly I expected Marco to call her out on the fact that she took Luca from him (and away to a foreign country) first

I'm so pleased the illegal divorce thing finally got mentioned! And it's probably nothing but I really like the way that the two times we've heard her vehemently say 'I won't!' were about 1) her refusal to betray Arman, and 2) her refusal to leave Arman  the US :P

So when she says the key to everything is getting Arman out of prison, she basically means the key is her and Arman being together as a partnership again, right? We're all hearing that, right??? 

Ugh my poor boy knows he's fucked. I bet he wishes his phone conversation with Thony had gone differently now

At first I was confused when they didn't attack him when he was with Hayak but of course hayak needs to keep separate from it to keep his hands clean

I love Nadia for not selling out Thony to Garrett.  Obviously it wasn't just for Thony's sake but I still appreciate it

Hey, it's the alley! I have a lot of pics of this spot bc I had no idea which parts would actually be in the shot lol

And aaaahh Fi goes back to the same cash place they used in 1x10! I walked right by there! 

God I love this soundtrack. Also this montage of terrible disguises is great lol.  And I think they actually even used one shot that is legit just Martha and Elodie laughing and I love it

It's funny that even when Garrett isn't being a direct antagonist against Thony and Arman, he's still fucking stuff up for them lol. But okay I assume when they say 'contact the exchange to freeze the account' they mean the site that hosts the online account, right? Because if they meant the physical place, then why wouldn't they have gone there to catch the person getting the money out?

I have decided that even though inmates get assigned their duties, Arman swapped whatever more desirable duty he got with someone else so he could mop instead, purely because it reminded him of Thony. (Shhh just let me have this.) And in which case that would mean that she indirectly saves his life because he then has the mop as a weapon when he's attacked lolll

I honestly yelped when the guy stabbed him. A beating I was prepared for, but not that! I literally yelled YOU FUCKING STABBED MY BOY! out loud and scared my dog lol

Also, this may earn me some judgement, but a bleeding Arman beating the shit out of two men?? That's hotttt lol

It's weird but cool to hear Fi say Nadia's name. The lines between Thony's worlds are blurring, indeed.

Fi and Chris insisting on coming with Thony is like that dude in Romeo and Juliet that doesn't get the message to Romeo in time. Just one of those small events that, if different, could have averted tragedy (though lbr I’m glad this particular ‘tragedy’ wasn’t averted haha).  Also at first when Thony and Marco started arguing right outside the door I was like "why are you doing this right here,  you'll wake Luca and probably other guests as well!" And then Chris came up the stairs and the shoving started and I was like "Oh that's why" lol

"It's him. Your gangster" I mean, gotta give Marco credit here bc he's kind of right?? Like lbr there's blind, baseless jealousy (like Arman towards Garrett, who is literally zero threat romantically) and then there's well-founded jealousy, and we all know Marco’s is the latter. It would be impossible to see Thony and Arman interact and not know there was some form of connection there; Marco's earlier mistake was in assuming it was just sexual in nature, but I think when he saw the way Thony pushed back against him (and against leaving the US) he started to realise it was more than that.  God I wish we'd gotten to hear what she said in response to that accusation instead of having the camera switch to Fi, but from his comment about her twisting reality I assume she found a way to deflect yet again. (And in her defence, she IS also wanting to stay for Fi and the kids, and because going back to the philippines to be trapped in an unhappy marriage would be a nightmare. But still. That doesn’t negate the fact that there’s also Arman. lol)

I yelled "BYEEEEEE!" at Marco's death and my dog wagged her tail really hard lol.  She knows what side to be on haha

God this cleaning job is NOT up to Thony's usual standard and it makes me so stressed lol.  Almost as stressed as her literally going right up to the guy in the office and showing her face aaaaaahhhh

Also Thony seriously you need to go somewhere further away and at least change clothes and put up your hair if you're going to go back to the place where you just had a face to face conversation with a guy who would still be there! C'mon where's my brilliant doctor-slash-mob-wife lol??? (too traumatised to be thinking clearly, obviously). Also Garrett if you can't put this one together you're a terrible agent lol

Ugh obviously Arman will be fine but I still hate seeing him all stabbed lol. Still, getting Thony's reaction when she finds out will be worth it haha

Ugh I am living for these mama bears protecting their family <33333

Okay so surely the first question the cops asked at the motel was 'is there camera footage' and yet they don't appear to have it (which if they did, would close the storyline very fast)-- which means Mr Motel Moustache apparently lied to police and kept it to himself??? Why???? What does he gain from taking that risk??? He doesn't know Thony is rich and basically a mob boss, so it's probably not about blackmail, and he doesn't seem the type to go that far to protect a stranger.  So why??? Is he doing sketchy stuff at the motel that he doesn’t want the cops finding out about if they get his footage?? I need answersssss lol

(Okay that’s all for week 1 haha, congrats if you made it this far lol)