#i want to hear phil break down how the science works

[mybraindumpsterfire]

I am fascinated by linguistics and I want Phil to make a video about it so badly. Like a video where he has Dan put recognizable people’s voices (like lines from Buffy Phil would know or something) through filters so it’s unrecognizable but you can still pick up on the formants and such. Then Phil uses his linguistic skills to figure out who it is. Or he like matches a person’s normal voice clip to another messed up voice clip of theirs I don’t know.

I just love linguistics and Phil and I want him to talk about it because it genuinely is interesting damn it!

[anonymous-dentist]

I refuse to watch this movie.

Or, the Enchanted (2007) au.

-

Quackity has to hold his brother’s hand to keep him from running out in traffic. Tubbo, ten years old and wise beyond his years, knows not to run out in traffic. He just has a fucking death wish. 

“I don’t see what the problem is,” Tubbo shrugs. 

He swings his and Quackity’s hands between them with a skip in his step. It’s cute, and he’s cute, but he’s also been spending too much time with his foster family because he’s sporting a fresh scrape on his elbow from trying to force a hit-and-run for the insurance money. Fucking Wilbur. Quackity is going to kill him one of these days. He’s actually going to. 

Quackity gives Tubbo a long-suffering look that Tubbo pleasantly ignores in favor of staring directly into the sun. 

“The problem is that that isn’t how insurance works,” Quackity painedly explains. He plants his free hand on the top of Tubbo’s head and aims it so he’s looking directly ahead of them. “If you throw yourself in front of a moving vehicle, you’re the one at fault. You’d have to-”

“That’s not what Wilbur said. Wilbur said-”

“Fuck Wilbur. Who’s the lawyer here? Fuck Wilbur. He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

Fucking Wilbur. Quackity is going to skin him alive and string him from a clothesline by his toenails. If he’s going to teach Quackity’s brother about insurance fraud, he should at least try to get it right. 

He lets out a sigh. It’s four p.m. on a Thursday afternoon, and he’s explaining how to commit insurance fraud to a ten-year-old child. Who has no insurance. Who would have to get his annoying fucking family to pay for his hospital bills, and his annoying fucking family would then turn to Quackity because he can’t get a fucking break. He can hear it now: Phil Craft on the phone telling him that their insurance doesn’t cover children, isn’t that strange? Hey, Quackity, aren’t you a lawyer? Can’t you take care of this? Thanks, mate! Fake smile evident over the phone. Quackity can imagine it now. Ugh. 

“Basically-” he sighs, trying not to sound as irritated as he feels. No need to be annoyed over something that won’t even happen. “So, basically, pedestrians get the right of way in traffic. If a car hit you, they’d have to pay a lot of money. I bet that’s what Wilbur said, right?”

Tubbo nods. At least he’s paying attention this time. 

Quackity nods as well. Good. This is already a better lecture than the arson one. 

“But,” he continues, “if you, the pedestrian, jumped out in front of a car without giving the car enough time to react, then you’re at fault. You’d have to pay for the damages to the car and the driver, and then a couple of fines on top of that. And the hospital bills, and-”

Tubbo throws his head back with a groan. “Oh my Goooood, I get it!”

And yet Quackity can feel him tugging at his hand as if he wants to throw himself right into traffic again. Little shit. Little idiot. He’s supposed to be in therapy for this. Quackity is going to have words with Phil over this… 

“Do you?” Quackity asks. “Do you really? ‘Cause I don’t think so.”

He shuffles Tubbo to his other side, swapping hands so that Tubbo is now holding his left hand. Away from the road, Tubbo begrudgingly stops his idiot lemming behavior. 

It’s almost rush hour, and Quackity can feel the heat beating down on him from all sides. The burning Nevada sun above, the blistering concrete sidewalk below, the throng of cars on the road to his right, the reflective skyscrapers to his left. Oh, Vegas, the land of hopes, dreams, and heatstroke. 

Despite it all, Quackity is still in a full suit because he has a meeting after this. Five p.m. sharp, he’s meant to be with a client on the other side of town, and here he is, walking his kid brother home from school just because Tubbo said he had something cool to show him. Quackity assumed it was another one of his cool little science project things he makes, but, no, it was attempted vehicular suicide. Jesus fucking Christ. 

Tubbo looks fine, though. Of course he does. Kid’s impervious. Quackity is half convinced that if he did get hit by a car, the car would end up the one in the hospital. He’s wearing a pair of Wilbur’s sunglasses and has Quackity’s own sunglasses hanging from his shirt collar because he asked with crocodile tears in his eyes and Quackity’s one weakness is sad-looking children. 

“You’re no fun,” Tubbo huffs. He blows the bangs out of his face. Phil needs to take him to get a haircut. Quackity makes a mental note to add that to the checklist. Therapy, haircut, adoption papers… 

“Look, all I’m saying is that Wilbur is a lying piece of shit.” Quackity rolls his eyes. “He’s probably just trying to get you killed.”

“No, I think he’s just dumb.”

Quackity bites back a laugh, but he doesn’t hide his smile. “I think you’re right. Tell him I called him an idiot and I’ll buy you ice cream.”

“Uncle Techno is already taking me out for ice cream,” Tubbo says. 

Quackity’s smile falls. “Well. That sounds fun.”

“It won’t be.”

Ah. 

“It’d be more fun if you took me for ice cream instead.”

Ah. 

Quackity winces and tries not to look at his brother, who he just knows is giving him a certified Look. It runs in the family, the Look, just like bad choices and asthma. Tubbo happens to be excellent at using the Look to his advantage even with his bangs covering his eyes most of the time. (Of course, he did learn from the best.)

Quackity uses his free hand to awkwardly fiddle with the arm of his sunglasses. His briefcase, also in that hand (so maybe it really isn’t free) bangs against his jaw. 

“Sorry,” he says, genuinely apologetic and trying to get it across through all the layers of Shut The Fuck Up that naturally laces his voice these days, “I’ve got a meeting in an hour, then I have some paperwork to get done, so-”

“I see,” Tubbo sighs. His grip on Quackity’s hand tightens so much that Quackity swears he hears his knuckles pop. 

Quackity winces again. Fuck, he’s good. Quackity can’t even blame Wilbur for this one, manipulation tactics run in the family, just like broken hearts and diabetes. 

He checks his watch, winces yet again when he sees the time, and stops walking to turn Tubbo to face him, anyway. 

“Look, I can’t make it tonight, but I can try to arrange something for this weekend?” he offers, fully knowing that he really genuinely doesn’t have any time this weekend to spare. He has a meeting with- guess who? Wilbur Soot- on Saturday morning and an afternoon-long training seminar and then a dinner with some rich fuck with a casino and then breakfast on Sunday with another rich fuck with a casino, and then he has church, and then he has chores and groceries and paperwork, and- 

Tubbo shrugs loosely. “Fine, I guess. Saturday at three p.m. sharp, I’ll meet you at the gelato shop by your work. I’ll make Wilbur drive me.”

Quackity blinks. He does have a lunch hour free at three, which he was planning on spending with a nap and a smoke, but he really doesn’t think he has a say in this. 

So he nods and smiles, and Tubbo smiles back, and Quackity thinks, wow, Tubbo’s done that a lot more since the Crafts took him in. What a lucky kid. 

Tubbo freezes suddenly, smile falling into something more confused. 

“Hey, Big Q?” he asks. “What did you say about vehicular homicide and insurance?”

Quackity frowns. “Uuuuh, I said that you shouldn’t do it. Why?”

“Oh, ‘cause there’s a guy in the road trying to get the insurance money.”

Quackity’s eyes widen and he spins around to see a real dumb-looking motherfucker standing in the middle of the road with his arms outstretched like Jesus Christ himself, eyes shut and mouth open in a smile. 

“Shit,” Quackity mumbles, heart racing. God, is he about to watch a suicide?

A honk from an SUV driving by and just barely missing the man. And the man laughs, almost sounding like a song. A fucking death march, really, what the fuck? 

“Shit,” Quackity more emphatically says. “Fuck, Tubbo, stay here and turn around.”

Without really thinking, he drops Tubbo’s hand and his briefcase and runs out into the road, almost getting his by a semi immediately. 

“Hey!” he shouts. He swears and flips off a sports car that honks at him as he runs in front of it. “Hey, what the fuck are you doing?”

He swears again and screeches to a halt to avoid getting run over by a scary woman on a motorcycle. Tubbo on the sidewalk shouts, definitely watching, the little shit. Oh, there’s no way Phil lets Quackity see him again after this… 

Once the coast is as clear as it’s going to get, Quackity bolts, getting to the man quickly and grabbing his shoulders and spinning him around to face the concrete meridian and fucking shoving him as hard as he can. 

The man protests and flaps his arms around like a bird trying to take off, heels stuck firmly in the road. 

“What are you doing?” he snaps. He turns around to glare down at Quackity. His eyes are a brilliant golden color that contrasts the bright embarrassed red of his face. “Let go! I’m trying to vibe here!”

Quackity looks up at him incredulously. “You’re trying to vibe? You’re going to get yourself killed, idiot!”

“Uh, no? They’re just horses. Animals love me!”

What? 

Quackity doesn’t have the time or the energy to question it, but he does have enough adrenaline to grit his teeth and properly start manhandling this insane fucker out of the road. 

“I swear to God if I get killed saving a fucking Ren faire employee I’m going to come back and haunt you until you’re a mummy,” he grunts. 

Because that’s what this dude has to be, a Ren faire guy. He’s got the outfit down. It’s pretty good quality, too. His fancy purple shirt feels like silk beneath Quackity’s hands, but that doesn’t matter because a nice shirt doesn’t matter when you’re roadkill. 

Surprisingly, the threat is enough to get the freak to move. He actually seems eager to run ahead, leaving Quackity alone in the middle of the road. Quackity quickly hurries after him, heart going a million miles a minute. 

What. The hell. 

Once at the meridian and the thin curb on either side of it, Quackity lets himself breathe again. He leans against the meridian and closes his eyes, trying to calm down. His hands shake as he pushes his sunglasses up into his hair. He scrubs his eyes with one hand and places his other hand over his heart. 

“Hello,” the Ren faire guy says. His voice is soft and melodic and grating to the ears and Quackity kinda wants to push him back out into traffic for all he’s done in the past three minutes. “Thank you.”

“No problem,” Quackity wheezes. He waves a hand in the guy’s general direction, not looking at him. “I’m gonna… call an ambulance in a second. Fuck. What were you doing out there? Were you trying to get yourself killed?”

“I was pushed into a well,” the guy says, and, yeah, that tracks. Sounds crazy, dude’s crazy. Man, Wilbur’s gonna love hearing about this… “And then I came out of it here. Wherever I am.”

Quackity lowers his hand from his eyes and gives the guy the Look. “You’re in Vegas, dude. I’m calling the ambulance.”

He pulls out his phone from his back pocket, but his hands are shaking too much for him to type, and he has Siri turned off. 

“‘Vegas’...” the man mutters, almost sounding like he’s in awe. He looks around the streets, at the skyscrapers, at the cars, at the stores, at the drunk guy pissing on a telephone pole by the Nordstom. “It’s beautiful.”

“Yeah, it’s great,” Quackity absently agrees. He gives up on typing and groans, looking across the street at a very concerned-looking Tubbo. “Fuck. We gotta get back over there.”

The man beams, teeth a startling white. “Easy! Hold on.”

Before Quackity can protest, he grabs Quackity by the hand and pulls him out into the road. 

“What the fuck?” Quackity screeches, panickedly looking around for any cars he might have to save them from, but every car they get even remotely close to skids to a halt a perfectly safe distance away almost magically. “What the fuck?”

“Told you,” the man teasingly says. “Animals love me.”

What the fuck. Again. 

As soon as they’re on the sidewalk, Quackity wrenches himself free and opens his arms for Tubbo to throw himself into. 

“What the hell was that?” Tubbo demands. “You wouldn’t have gotten any insurance from that!”

“Is that all you care about?” Quackity tiredly asks. “The insurance? What about me, huh? Little asshole.”

He can hear Tubbo’s giggles, though, so all he does in response is playfully scowl and ruffle Tubbo’s hair. 

“Is that your son?” the man suddenly asks, scaring Quackity right out of his skin. 

He jumps away from Tubbo with a bit of a sour taste in his mouth. 

“No,” he immediately says, head shaking almost violently. “No. He’s my brother. Younger brother.”

Tubbo says, “Whoah, I like your pants, big man.”

He steps up next to Quackity, eyes glimmering like stars, and Quackity thinks Oh, no. 

And then the man strikes a dramatic pose, hair and cape fluttering in the stale desert wind, and Quackity thinks, again, Oh, no. 

“Why, thank you!” he beams, toothpaste commercial smile and all. 

“You look like a prince,” Tubbo says. 

“That’s because I am one,” the guy says, and of course he is. He’s insane. “Prince Karl of Andalasia at your service, my liege.”

He bows with a flourish, much to Tubbo’s obvious delight. God-fucking-damnit. 

And then he lifts his head and winks up at Quackity with a smirk, and Quackity, yet again, can only think Oh, no. 

[amazingphilza]

study buddies :: cc!multiple x reader

fluff , platonic , gender neutral ! some headcanons if the mcyts were trying to help you do hw :D

cc’s included in order: tommyinnit , tubbo , ranboo , wilbur soot , philza , technoblade

tommyinnit

i feel like he’s the type to be in a long discord call with you whilst you both try to finish your work

mans uses the screensharing feature like there’s no tomorrow

“y/n watch my stream on discord and help me guess the answers”

“tommy no! i haven’t even taken a film class before”

“your guess is good as mine”

“just cheat and google the answers!!!”

“fuck you”

he actually just wants your attention because he’s bored out of his mind doing homework

five minutes later of asking you to help him guess questions he’s like

“hey y/n”

“what now?”

“let’s play bedwars”

“oh my god shut up!!!”

if tommy has to speedrun something before a deadline, it is a whole different story tho; he will be so focused on completing that he won’t hear what you’re saying

if you’re struggling in math, you’re on your own

“math is shit, only numbers i need is my primes and youtube analytics” says tommy any time you complain about math

besides the fact he isn’t good at solving math problems, you can’t even read his handwriting if he did try showing you how to do a problem

“okay, y/n, it’s simple, just look” he says in his kareninnit voice and everything

you’d be like “is the variable a G or a 9??”

“fuck you that’s a 4!!!”

tubbo

i don’t know if tubbo ever talked about school before but something about him makes me think he’s actually pretty good at math

like he can explain a few things when it comes to math / algebra

CODING GO BRRRR

no geometry or calculus though, anything past algebra will go bad

if tubbo is doing homework with you, he will definitely tune you out

“hey tubbo can you help me on this question?”

you don’t get a response until like 20 minutes later

“oh yeah, what was it y/n?”

like now you answer? i just got the answer myself after so long, forget you smh

“oh nothing tubbo, nevermind!”

but you’re still grumbling in your head because if he answered just a bit earlier you wouldn’t have gone through the work of finding the answer online

i can also imagine if you’re taking chemistry tubbo is like ;

“oh you’re taking chemistry? let’s make some bombs!” /lh

tubbo would definitely pull an all-nighter with you to finish your projects together

if you had a group project, he would make you do the writing part while he does the drawing part

“we definitely aced this project”

“of course we did, if i made you draw we would’ve ended up with stick figure diagrams”

“TUBBO. THE FUCK?”

ranboo

okay i know ranboo said he isn’t a theatre or band kid (unless im wrong and forgetful) but i feel like he’d be somewhat educated in the topics nonetheless

half the time he’s great moral support, helping you stay motivated !

the other half is him making fun of you

“i cant believe you’re failing, that is so sad, can’t be me”

“it’s literally an honors class, ranboo! it’s supposed to be hard!!”

“taking an honors class willingly? also cant be me AHAHA”

i honestly can’t see ranboo going to school like i know he’s a minor and said he had zoom calls before and plays volleyball but like did i miss something? has he dropped out yet? like something about ranboo does not scream “student” /lh

besides that, i’m not sure what subject he would actually be good in,,, but something about nutrition/health sciences,, he knows a few things

don’t get me wrong, i don’t think he actually likes the subject but somehow remembers what he learned from the class

also gives me the type of energy of the type of person to take a first aid class to be a certified person to do cpr on someone just to kill time during his lunch breaks for a while or something

“i am a certified cpr person”

“my life in ranboo’s hands? oh god please no”

you two would probably joke about the ‘bad’ people in your classes or talk shit about your schools than actually doing anything homework related ngl AHAHAH

“you think your school is down bad? mine went back to campus full time after like 6 months into quarantine because they were running out of money”

“what the hell y/n? your school is a scam, drop out”

“arghhhh i knowww”

“i bet i make more money than your teachers combined AHAHAH”

wilbur soot

he doesn’t seem like the best person to ask for help for homework but can info dump you on very specific historical events + a bit of geography

i kinda see him as the person you can ask to proof read an essay for you and would help it improve immensely

who needs a thesaurus when you have vocabulary boy wilbur?

i dunno if it’s an american thing only or at all, but if/when you get to studying hamilton in your english class, he will get so fucking excited

“no wilbur it isn’t fun! imagine listening to lin-manuel miranda rap ‘alexander hamilton’ at the white house from like 2009 on repeat for over an hour whilst trying to write an analysis about it!! it was so distracting”

“well clearly someone has a personal problem with mr lin-manuel. if i were you, i’d be singing the whole thing”

is this last bit personal and complete spite from my freshman year english class? yes. i do not care? no. /hj

unrelated but i actually scribbled nice guy ballad lyrics and other songs on my english scratch papers in freshman year but anyway

probably isn’t the best person to be in a call to do homework with but wilbur doesn’t mind you ringing him occasionally sometimes

i dunno i can just see him easily get bored of the silence or something but also doesn’t want to bother you too much

but he is genuinely proud of you whenever you tell him you aced a big test you were studying for :D

philza

this man’s bad advice is as bad as him trying to help you on any subject

he’s an old man so /hj

but like honestly, he hasn’t been at school for so long, phil can probably only help with the most basic things when it comes to school

if you have a wack teacher that makes you collect data through surveying people, phil would be one of the best people to ask! straightforward and won’t take too much of your time compared to other people ahem,,

statistics things ! sobs

if you ever complain a lot about your classes and contemplating dropping out and stuff, he will def scold you hard

“ugh phillllllllll can i just like,, never go to school again?”

“do not drop out”

“argh fine, i won’t just ‘cause philza minecraft said so”

honestly if you get a high score in a big test like your sats/gcse’s (whatever you’re taking from wherever you are) he’d probably order you a small meal or something to celebrate :D

like how phil bought ranboo bought him food to his house, it would start as a joke but when you get your test scores back he’s like “YOOO GOOD JOB Y/N”

expect a left meat pizza coming to your house .

technoblade

like wilbur, techno is also helpful when it comes to history!

def knows a decent bit of literature too

besides that i don’t really see him being that helpful

even if he was supposed to be an english major

he will just get mad at the school system for teaching you useless things

“being in school is good but why do you need to know how to know if something is a triangle or not? i can obviously see with my eyes that it’s a triangle”

“i dunno! ask the person that made up geometry”

“just look at a kaleidoscope and be over with it, it isn’t that hard”

“that isn’t how it works—”

“bruhhh”

if you’re looking for the person to call while doing homework, he is not the person /lh

it’s either like 0 or 100 with techno

he can just completely not say anything and ignore you or go on a full rant about whatever class or homework you have

if you have an essay you need written, it will take a lot of bribing but he might take the opportunity if you are rich

“techno i’ll paypal you $10 please help me”

“no. i can make 10 times that amount in 5 minutes if i just started streaming right now”

“techno i don’t have that kind of money! pleaseee”

“no. instead of complaining, you can use that time to actually start you work”

“you’re the worst”

then you speedrun the essay and get an A just to spite him

[excaliefur]

Freedom is nothing but a chance to be better

Hello yes, i am posting this late i meant to post it a few days ago but whatever.

Also alcohol tw.

On AO3 just because I can :)

Wilbur, Niki and Jschlatt, the three of them had each other and their kids, that’s all they needed right?

The question lingered in their minds, will they ever be free if they don’t run?

“To the kids” Wilbur toasted, raising his glass. “The kids” Niki and Schlatt replied in unison. As Will drank, feeling the wine go down his throat, he thought about the kids.

It was always for them, god knows, without them, Niki Schlatt and will would be nowhere near this hellhole. Tommy, Tubbo and Ranboo. The three of them were too young to fend for themselves, too young to be left alone without guidance, much like Wilbur was. But if Will ever did to Tommy what Phil did to him, he’d urge the gods to strike him down immediately.

Hell would freeze over before Will ever even though about leaving Tommy to fend for himself. Will was ready to walk through hell for Tommy if that’s what it took to have a happy life. They didn’t need Phil or Technoblade. Phil was never a real dad and techno stopped being Wilbur’s brother when he stopped sticking up for Will. Nobody knew where they were, to be honest, Wilbur didn’t care.

Niki was slightly different. Wilbur resented Phil, that was easy to see. It was harder to see that Niki resented Eret. Sure, he had a good reason to be gone, but that doesn’t mean it was ok to leave Niki, a traumatised child who could barely survive on her own, in charge of another traumatized 5 year old. Ranboo was an angel and Niki couldn’t hate him if she tried.

Eret however, was a traitor to her. Yeah he maybe king and he maybe the best one this land has ever had, but if he was so wealthy and good why couldn’t he afford to help Niki. Niki lost her childhood raising one that wasn’t hers, much like Wilbur and Schlatt, maybe that’s why they got along so well.

Neither Niki or Wilbur knew if Tubbo was Schlatt’s son or sibling. It didn’t really matter though, he was stuck taking care of him just like Wilbur and Niki were. Schlatt seemed really intimdating, and he could be if he wanted to. Deep down, though, both of them knew how much he cared about Tubbo.

Both were there to comfort him when Tubbo got a deadly illness, both of them knew how worried he got. He didn’t leave his brothers bedside for days until Niki managed to get him to eat and rest, promising that neither she or Wilbur would leave Tubbo alone. Both celebrated with him when Tubbo said his first word, his first word was Schlatt. That was the first time they ever saw him cry.

From that day, all three of them promised that they would raise the kids well, and they’d raise them together. Their household was chaos, naturally. 3 toddlers with 3 teenagers left alone is bound to be chaotic. They still had their moments of peace though. It was a family, a real one, one none of them had ever had before.

It still got out of hand though sometimes, so once a month the grownups- ironic, isn’t it, calling themselves grownups was ironic. Schlatt had just recently turned 18 and yet he was so much more mature than Phil. No time to worry about Phil though, Phil didn’t deserve his attention.

Once a month, the grownups would have a night to themselves, kids around, just games, junk food and alcohol. Secretly, it was the night they all looked forward to. Yeah they love the kids but its nice to have a break once in a while. That was this night.

Schlatt looked old enough that they didn’t ask for his ID when buying the wine, and Niki bought the snacks while Wilbur got all the kids to bed. It was a nice night. Singing old songs from a time where they weren’t burdened by this responsibility, playing games and messing around as teenagers do. Telling tales of sorrow and misery over a cup of wine, telling secrets they couldn’t tell anyone else. It was nice. It was a breath of fresh air after everything.

“Why don’t we just leave?” Wilbur murmured. Niki was humming a old tune under her breath and Schlatt was getting more wine. “Sorry?” Niki inquired. “Why don’t we just up and leave this town? Go on an adventure?” He repeated, louder. Schlatt sighed.

“You know we can’t leave them, we’d be just as bad as them” He said, a trace of venom could be heard when he said them. Wilbur nodded, growing more confident and standing up from the rickety plastic table. “Yeah I mean, bring them along! All 6 of us just leaving and making it somewhere else, somewhere better!”

Schlatt looked thoughtful at that proposition, while Niki shook her head. “We don’t have the money for that, and besides that you know we can barely afford school here anyways, imagine how bad it’d be somewhere else”

Wilbur paused, he didn’t think of that. Feeling dismayed he sat back down. Schlatt stopped him though, with his hand on his shoulder. A frown on his face, not at Niki but, thoughtfully. “Do they really need to go to school though? Before you say anything hear me out”

He hurried to stop Niki who opened her mouth. She closed it and nodded. “Right so, Wills a geography nerd, he’s amazing at English and other languages, and also learns super quick. I have resources that will help us teach them, and you yourself did great in school, and can definitely help in maths and sciences!”

Niki thought for a moment. “Isn’t it illegal for them to drop out though?” Schlatt hesitated and Wilbur quickly swooped in. “We can apply for homeschooling them, and when we move, its probable we won’t need much of that, probably just survival skills” He said, looking at Schlatt for backup.

Schlatt nodded. “Exactly, and we won’t even need to pay for schooling.” Niki nodded “I, I think that’s smart” Niki smiled.

“Where would we go though?” She pondered outloud.

Will, feeling confident again, moved over to the window. “You remember the joyride we had when I turned 16? When they were at Sally’s place?” Niki nodded, joining him at the window. He raised his hand and pointed in the distance. “Around 50 km there, there was this large unoccupied territory, in Esempee right? So that’s where I’m thinking. It was completely untouched, a beautiful area where nobody could ever bother us, and we could build a home for all of us, a real one.”

Schlatt nodded as he spoke. He handed Niki and wills glasses to them respectively, and grabbed his own.

“So? What do you say?” He asked.

She hesitated, “Ok it might just be my drunk brain but, I say lets do this, lets get out of this hellhole” Niki said, raising her glass. Will cheered, high-fiving Schlatt who had a wide smile on his face. Will set down his glass and pulled Niki into a hug, inviting Schlatt to it too. Schlatt hid the smile on his face as he grumbled and joined.

After a moment, they broke apart, and Wilbur raised his glass. “To a new beginning” he said softly, a small smile on his face. Niki smiled and raised her glass, Schlatt following suit. “To a new beginning” they crooned.

As Niki drunk, she felt herself hoping that this wouldn’t fall through. Maybe for once she could be optimistic about this again. Maybe, it would be ok. For the kids and for them, they were just teenagers after all.

Maybe they would get the freedom they craved

Hi hello yes. If you made it this far, thank you :D

Uh remember to drink water and sorry for the quality of this, not my best work but i haven’t written dialogue in forever. 

[pianogal]

Flirting Lessons

Summary: Just as Dan was about to give up on love, Dan becomes Phil's tutor. (University AU)

Word Count: 2k

This phanfic is a gift to @phanetixs from @phandomgiftexchange !! I hope you like it!!

꧁꧂

In an attempt to cheer me up, Pj has offered his vast knowledge in the art of flirting. He's convinced me that a good distraction will occupy my mind. As Pj and I walk down the hallway to the cafeteria, we rehearse this week's lines.

"You're cute, wanna bang?" I say sarcastically.

"C'mon Dan! If you really want to be back in business, you have to take it seriously!" Pj complains.

I know exactly why he urges me to 'get back in business.' Deep down we all know that I haven't gotten over my breakup. Although it's been 4 months, the thought of Charlie churns my stomach. It's not that I miss the guy, it's the way he chose to dump me. It wasn't the typical: "It's not you, It's me." He went ahead and said: "It's definitely you."

I always thought flirting was stupid. And the reason for it is because I really have no idea how to flirt. People make it look so easy, but to me it's worse than math. It's my fault for asking Pj to teach me how to flirt.

The cafeteria is a wide open space filled with round and square tables circulating the area. From the direction of our dorms, the smoothie bar is positioned to our left, right next to a group of fairly attractive college students. Although Pj made me practice my lines, I was not ready to put them in practice.

"Do you remember what to say?" Pj asks.

I look at him and widen my eyes. I realized what little confidence I have in walking up to random guys, let alone flirt. "I think this is a bad idea," I admit.

"No it's not! I say you should walk up to them and ask them to marry you," Pj encourages. Before I could protest, Pj began pushing me towards their direction.

As I walked to my doom, I realized a pair of eyes staring at me. I see Charlie to my right watching as Pj forces me to interact with the group of guys. Pj notices where my attention is and whispers behind my ear, "Show Charlie how much these guys would kill to date you."

Pj stops pushing me just a few feet in front of the group. All 4 guys notice my sudden appearance and look side to side as if silently questioning which of them knew me. I turn back to see Pj heading to the smoothie bar while Charlie patiently waits for my failure to sink in.

"Uh, do you guys take Literature with Professor Starch?" Was the only sentence I could come up with.

Each guy looks at their group before saying anything. The tall brunette on the left answers, "None of us do. Sorry." After his response, they all began to walk the opposite direction of me. I then turn to see Charlie walking towards me while laughing at my misery.

"Did you really think you could find a rebound?" Charlie chuckles.

"Yeah I was hoping to do the same thing you did," I harshly replied.

Charlie straightens his posture so as to stand taller than me. He pushes his dirty blonde hair from his face and relaxes his devious grin. "You wish you could find a rebound like I did," Charlie walks away after saying what I thought to be the worst thing I needed to hear at that moment.

"What the hell happened?" Pj rushes to me while holding his newly purchased strawberry and banana smoothie. "What did that jerk say to you?"

Although Charlie meant nothing to me, his words would always take a toll on me. Probably because he knew exactly what my biggest insecurities are. He used every single one to taunt me. In this case, he made it very clear that I would never be good enough to earn love.

"I need to go. Class starts in 15 minutes and I need to talk to my professor about an assignment," without waiting for her response, I walk away and head to class.

I lied to Pj about speaking to my professor before class started. It was just an excuse to get away from everyone. I needed time to process all the events that went down. I sit on the far end of the room. No one is here yet, but soon enough students will start rolling in.

I feel stupid. I don't want to tell anyone about how I feel because they'll probably think I can't get over a breakup. It's not that I still love Charlie. It's the fact that Charlie dumped me because he wasn't happy with me. 4 months ago, Charlie said he preferred to be single than to be with me. 

I loved him and for a while I thought he loved me too. I couldn't understand why someone that loved me would dump me out of nowhere. And I wonder if I wasn't good enough for Charlie, who the hell is going to love me? I'm not attractive, my personality sucks, I'm not outstanding in any way, and I don't even have my shit together.

"Is this seat taken?" A tall, well built guy broke me away from my train of thought. I look at him for a second to take in his completion. Fair skin, black hair to match with his pair of blue eyes. He wears a plain white t-shirt along with black jeans. I stopped myself from drooling.

I look down at the seat and look back to his eyes. It's been two weeks since class started. The only person who sat next to me dropped out the second day of class. With a sly smile, I say, "Nope, you can sit here."

"Thank you," he smiles back. He pulls the chair away from the table and relaxes into his new seat, "My name is Philip, but you can call me Phil. I've been absent for the past few weeks due to illness. Have I missed anything important?"

"Well, uh… I’m Dan." I'm dumbfounded. I couldn't believe how someone this attractive is sitting next to me. Then again, I'm sure the only reason he's hanging out is just to pass the class. Even so, I already failed flirting this morning. I was not planning at all to fail again.

"We had several assignments due each week, but they're not worth much. Probably ten points each. Maybe if you talk to Professor Starch he can give you an extension for them," I smile politely once more.

Phil sighs and leans back into his chair. Our gazes turn over to Professor Starch waltzing into the classrooms as he hurriedly reaches his desk. He logs on to the monitor and turns on the projector screen. I steer my attention away from our Professor and redirect it to my notes to hide my face. As much as I'd love to get to know Phil more, I can't stand but feel like it's a waste of his time to speak to me.

"Good afternoon everyone!" Professor Starch greets. "I hope everyone is doing well. I apologize for being late, I was deciding if I wanted to come to work today." Light chuckles fill the room. "Today we will be discussing ‘Don Quijote.’"

As I flipped through my notes, Phil lays his hand on my wrist. I look over to see him staring straight at me. "I know this is sudden, but do you think after class we can meet up and go over what I've missed?"

I really want to, but I don't know how Pj would feel if I bailed out our study session for a cute guy. "I don't know if I can after class. But I'm sure if you talk to the professor he'd be cool. He's really nice and-"

Phil moves closer to me and says, "I don’t have anyone else who can help. Can we please meet after class, Dan?"

"Of course," I immediately reply.

I have absolutely no idea why those words came out of my mouth. It is almost as if I had no control on what I said. I didn't even think about my answer. I realized my eyes are still trained on Phil. I can feel my face heating up and quickly look away. I didn't want him to think I was desperate to meet with him. There goes my last bit of dignity.

"I really appreciate your help, Dan," he smirks and turns to look at what Professor Starch has written on the board.

I sigh and reply, "No problem." 

꧁꧂

"The reason Don Quijote turns into a knight is because..." It's been an hour of nonstop tutoring. Although I'm grateful for the view, it is time consuming to be teaching two weeks worth of Literature. 

"Because of the books he’s read?" Phil almost asks.

"Yep! We just have to finish chapter five and then you'll be all caught up," I say to him, but also with the intent of reassuring myself.

We are seated in the right corner of Amy's Baking Company. We chose this spot because it's quiet and has comfy chairs. Not many people are here today. A couple of students spread across the Bakery, but other than that, it's pretty dead today.

"Do you mind if we take a little break," Phil asks.

"Yeah sure," I was hoping he'd feel as tired as I was. I close my notebook and focus on my new assignment that popped up on my computer screen.

"Tell me about yourself," Phil speaks up. I stare at him for a second. I'm trying to decide if there's any possible chance that Phil could be interested in me. Now I think about all the things I could say to sell myself.

"Well, I'm 20, I'm in my sophomore year, I'm a Political Science major and..." How do I make a move?

"And?" Phil leans forward against the table, as if intrigued by what my last response could be.

"I'm single…” My response of the year. 

Phil chuckles. I couldn't read him at all. I wasn't sure if he was ready to walk out the door and drop out of class or go along with my answer/question. I thought I'd had enough earlier, but I guess I came back for round 2.

"I'm 24, I took a gap year to figure out what I wanted to study. I'm now an English major and I'm single too," he then winks and smirks at me. "Why are you single?"

"I'm not good at flirting," I admit. "What about you?"

"No reason," he says without blinking.

"Why not?" I press for more information. 

"There’s no one that interests me,” Phil deadpans. 

"That sucks," is the only thing I could muster. By this point, I couldn't look at him directly. I tried to avoid his gaze by looking at my laptop's screen.

Part of me was hoping Phil would ask me out. Guys never ask me out for anything. The fact that Phil wanted to study with me after class is news to me. Curiosity washed over me. I want to know why he wasn’t interested in anyone. 

"How come?" I ask, now returning my full attention to Phil.

Phil then tilts his head. I suppose my question must've caught him off guard. "Well, you don’t know how to flirt.” 

“That I… what?” I ask. 

“I’m not interested in you yet because you haven’t flirted with me,” Phil smirks. 

My eyes widened. I feel my cheeks heat up once more. “Why would I flirt with you?” 

“I guess I thought you liked me,” he smiles cheekily. 

“What makes you think that?” I ask while my cheeks readen.

“Just a hunch.”

I sigh and say, “You seem to like me then.”   

"Tell you what," Phil pulls out his cell and unlocks it. He hands me over his phone with the 'New Contact' screen laid out. "Let's exchange phone numbers. When you learn how to flirt, give me a call."

“For what reason would I tell you?” I ask knowing his response. 

“So you can ask me out,” Phil stands from his seat and winks before he turns and leaves the bakery. I suppose I’ll have to beg Pj for more lessons.

[captainjimothycarter]

Prompt: okay so Peggy is de-aged and Steve finds out but he’s far away undercover. Like worst timing ever so she gets on the phone and he races to her—big heartfelt reunion and everyone is there to witness and it’s beautiful, but don’t forget the snark. Maybe avengers didn’t really believe that their relationship was so pure 😱😭😭😭♥️

Oh my god so i am on sleepy pain meds bc i hurt my back and this might be the worst thing i’ve ever done.

--

Everything about this was hushed-hushed, no one was to know. Of course, naturally at Shield that meant everyone knew but the intended people. That meant when Peggy found herself waking up to a body that was only in distant memory, Steve was nowhere to be found. It didn’t take much prodding from a Doctor Banner and or Jemma Simmons to get an answer as to where exactly he was.

Over 400,000 miles away. Undercover. On some vital information that is meant to save their asses in some case or another.

Peggy was not a patient woman, even if Banner and Simmons kept her busy with all these tests. Even if they were the most patient people in the world when it came to Peggy suddenly getting her old body back and being right as rain. She understood the need for tests to see if she ran in tip-top shape and wasn’t going to deteriorate but what she really wanted was to call Steve.

How could no one see what was important to her?

Well, maybe some people did.

The lab was empty as Jemma brought her in for another round of testing, her face stoic as she brought her into a new room with just a table and a phone. She pressed a finger to her lip and motioned that she had one call to make and a timer on the clock said she had a few set minutes. 

“Thank you,” she breathed to her, pulling Jemma into a tight hug. She had to be mindful of her strength now, given the serum.

“I know how it feels to be separated from your life partner, even if this case it’s just miles.” The look in her eyes told a story that Peggy wanted to dissect. Later, she told herself. “Banner and I will keep people ready but if you hear us bang on the door, drop the call.”

That’s all Peggy needed.

She found herself clinging to the simple block of a phone that was meant for satellite calls, listening to the breaking dial tone. Then the click. The heavy breathing. The slight pain in his breath, like he was reminding himself to breathe.

“Fury? Coulson? What-what is it? We’re sorta busy - there’s…”

Oh, his voice. That beautiful tone. Even if the break in it made her worry about the pain he was in.

“Hello? Is anyone there? Oh, fuck. Sam, duck!”

She could hear crashing, a pause, then laughter from Steve that made her eyes sting and her heart soar.

“Steve,” she breathed, feeling the tears roll down her cheeks. She didn’t bother to wipe them off.

“Peggy?” He sounded about as shocked as she did. “Peggy is that you? Where...how…?”

“It’s a long story,” she laughed. “De-aged thanks to your blood samples, a project I did not approve of but I am glad they did it anyway.” She flinched at a loud screech and clung to the phone. “Steve? Steve! Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, doll. I’m okay.” He sighed over the phone, hearing his own aggression. “I’ll be right there. Don’t leave HQ. Sam, we gotta go!” 

“Be careful and…” She clung to the phone like it was her lifeline. “Don’t you dare fly a plane, Rogers. I mean it.”

“I love you too.” 

Even over the phone, she could hear that trademark smirk as the line died on them just in time for Jemma to open the door.

--

“So the rumors are true?” Jemma asked her when they weren’t exactly alone an hour later. She stood beside Peggy as the new patient was jogging lightly on the treadmill. Banner was on the other side of the room, doing something on the computer. 

Steve had just been confirmed to be coming back in-land and it would take a few hours. There was another agent or two here, someone by the name of Bobbi, working beside Jemma and adjusting the monitor to Jemma’s height. Someone named Fitz was with Banner and given Jemma’s heart eyes on him, she could guess that was her life partner. 

“I suppose we’re no longer at our war nor am I officially his liason, so yes,” Peggy mused, slowing the speed down to a small trot. “Steve and I were...together.”

“I thought that was only for the history books?” Banner mused, looking over his shoulder at her. “Y’know, the hero gets the girl sorta thing.”

“He didn’t get me,” Peggy scoffed, rolling her eyes. “It’s complicated.”

“I think those two know a thing or two about complicated,” Bobbi mused, her head bobbing towards Fitz and Jemma. She looked downright amused. “As do I.” 

“It…” Peggy sighed as she hit the stop button much to Jemma’s frowning. “Simmons, I’ve been at this all morning. I am fine. Anyway...Steve and I were in a relationship before…” Her throat tightened just at the thought alone. Before...he sacrificed himself for the greater good and took a piece of her with him.

“Miss Carter,” Fitz suddenly spoke, seeing the look on Peggy’s face. He shared a look with Jemma, rolling his stool over to her. “Why don’t we go for a stroll in the garden, hm? I take it you had some personal touches in the plants there? Jemma and Dr. Banner can run the analysis on your tests before they treat you like another dancing monkey.”

“I’d like that,” Peggy sighed, pulling her hair off of her neck in an attempt to cool down.

--

Turns out, it wasn’t just Banner who doubted her relationship. Tony did too. Even Fury. Everything seemed to relate to the history books of a picture-perfect tale of them together just for Steve to lose her. 

The only people who seemed to understand were those working under Coulson. Even Phil Coulson seemed to understand their relationship to a degree. Though, Fitz and Jemma seemed to understand on a personal level and their young love...it made Peggy’s heart swell. 

By the time she got the notification Steve’s plane was in the area, Peggy was freshly showered and being lead up to the docks by Jemma, Fitz, and Bobbi. Suddenly the people part of Steve’s team had other things to do.

She could barely sit still as the plane landed and the ramp was lowered. Steve was not the first one-off. The first one-off, basically running off before the ramp was fully lowered was a tall, muscular, yet slender blonde with purple hearing aids. She watched him throw himself to Bobbi, knocking them both to the ground. Who she could only assume was Sam was next, the man giving her a trademark wink that reminded her of Gabe Jones, before hugging FitzSimmons to his chest and helping Bobbi up.

Steve did not get off and she feared the worst. 

“He fell asleep behind the wheel,” Sam whispered to her, patting her shoulder. “Told ‘im not to pilot but he said they’d get there faster.”

“The bastard,” Peggy sighed. “Never bothers to listen to a thing I say.” 

Ignoring the reunions around him, she jogged inside and passed the small cots and a few labeled containers that Fitz was carefully grabbing. She found Steve as Sam had promised. Behind the controls, head tucked into his chest. The few stray hairs falling onto his forehead, chin rising with every breath he took. 

He was breathtaking and Peggy’s eyes brimmed with tears. She dropped to her knees beside him, hearing Jemma pause as she looked over to make sure their prized science experiment didn’t just die on them. 

“Oh, darling,” Peggy breathed, her red painted nails [habits died hard] reached out to touch his cheek, stroking the soft stubble. Her hand moved to push his hair out of his face and smiled at how a lock fell right back. “Working yourself to the bone again. Don’t you know when to rest?”

“He does not,” Clint mused, crossing his arms and leaning into the entranceway. “I think you know that by now.”

“And I know you follow suit and are avoiding medical,” Bobbi pointed out, wrapping an arm around her boyfriend’s waist. “Come on. Before Hunter and Bucky see you like this, you idiot. Did you break another rib?”

Peggy ignored them as they left, leaning up to gently press a tender kiss to Steve’s lips. She was met with a flutter of baby blue eyes that brought her back to the first time she saw them. A scrawny Brooklyn Native covered in red dust and in a helmet far too big for him. He smiled against her lips, eyes still hazy with sleep.

“Are you an angel?” he whispered, pressing their foreheads together but making no other moves. She was sure he stopped breathing.

The question made Peggy laugh. “No, darling, no. I don’t think that statement has worked on anyone.”

“Damn.” He rubbed at his eyes and yawned, having enough courtesy to turn his head before he wrestled Peggy into his arms. He couldn’t care about their little crowd. He needed her. Hastily kissing her lips like he needed to breathe.

“You two are disgusting,” a voice snorted from the entranceway. 

Peggy didn’t even need to look up to know Steve had thrown the shield haphazardly at Bucky. 

“We’re making up for lost time,” Steve groaned, pulling away from Peggy with kiss-swollen lips. “You don’t gotta look.”

“How can I not when you’re kissing right in front of me? Hiya, Pegs.” Bucky wrapped her up in a hug and kissed the side of her face, letting Steve drag his weary body out of the chair. “Do me a favor and get this sap home.”

“Consider it done. I think we need to christen the bed anyway,” she mused thoughtfully.

Bucky’s expression was everything to her as Steve wrapped her up in a hug and half carried her off of the ship.

--

“Hang on it’s real?” 

Tony breathed, turning to point his wooden spoon threateningly at Peggy’s face. She easily batted the spoon away with her own, making him pout.

“What’s real?” Steve sighed, dropping into the stool beside Peggy with his own coffee from the counter. “Our relationship?”

“Yes! I thought that was just a...thing Howard and you made up! I didn’t think you and Cap actually got together!” 

Peggy rolled her eyes, draining the last of her tea. “Christ, is everyone going to say that?”

“I mean, I thought you two boned or kissed, but…” Clint mused from the couch, his leg up in the air to wave in their direction. “Not like kiss-kiss.”

“What are you twelve?” Natasha snickered. “Of course they were together. Don’t you see how Steve pined after her? Even in just her photos at the museum.”

“Aw, you pined after her?” Bucky breathed, earning an elbow from Steve. “Oh c’mon, punk, I had to live with this dancing around one another crap for years before Hydra finally put me out of my misery.”

“Hey, not funny,” Steve grumbled. “Still not funny. That will never be funny. And we didn’t dance around one another.”

“It is funny. I told yah, I was found before you and everything.” Bucky huffed, stealing a croissant from Tony’s hand to bite into. “And yes you did. Pegs, tell him.”

“I wasn’t dancing around,” Peggy mused, refilling her mug. “Steve was the dancing monkey.”

“I see where you two learned it from,” Bobbi teased, throwing a look where Fitz and Jemma were sitting on the other end of the couch from Clint’s prodding foot.

“If everyone can stop taking the mickey out on all of us that would be great,” Fitz over dramatically sighed. “Steve and Peggy can finally be together, thanks to this genius.” He squeezed Jemma’s frame to him, making her flush. 

“And Dr. Banner,” Peggy pointed out. “Where is he, by the way? I haven’t seen him since we left.”

“Vacation. Something about this was a favor to the history books,” Bobbi mused, waving her hand. “So, you two...Pegs, when’s the wedding date? And don’t tell me not yet. You two finally get to be together. I think you and FitzSimmons over there need to do a double destination date.”

Peggy and Jemma shared a look from over the table, making Steve laugh. “I wouldn’t say no to that. What do you say, Miss Simmons?”

“I’ll draw up the wedding plans.”

My tip jar

[joannie95]

Legacy- Part 36

Pairing: Carter!reader x ?????

Summary:  Everyone knows Peggy Carter is a force to be reckoned with, who could have guessed her granddaughter would hold the same ferocity, if not more.This story follows y/n Carter’s life as she faces the obstacles life pitches her.

Warnings: Swearing, mentioned death

A/N: Thank you to @mo320 and @hermionie-is-my-queen for proofreading and helping with the ideas for this chapter, thank you to @writeyourmindaway for making these awesome text dividers im so excited to use them all

Once you reach the bridge you come face to face with Phil, before you get a chance to say anything he pulls you into a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry Phil." It's no secret that he's been a father figure for a while now, one of your biggest fears is that you'll disappoint him. Leaving him behind without a word was difficult to do.

"You don’t ever have to apologize, you did what you thought was best for you. You're back now and that's all that matters." 

Once he let's go things just seem to fall into place as if you never left.

"So I heard you fangirled and made an absolute fool of yourself in front of Steve Rogers." You laughed when you noticed his face go red.

"I did not make a fool of myself." He tried to argue.

"Oh, Steve, I'm such a huge fan, you know I watched you sleep. I helped design your new suit. I hope you like it, I love you." You mocked his voice in an exaggerated tone. 

He playfully shoved you. "I really missed you kid."

"I missed you too." You look up when you hear someone clear their throat.

"Agent Carter." Nick is giving you an unreadable look. "It's good to have you back."

You nod and give him a quick smile. "It's good to be back sir." Once he walked away you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding and waited for the rest of the team to make their way inside. 

You noticed how amazed Steve and Bruce were of everything around them. To your side Natasha opened a file on Clint, you walked behind her and put your hand on her shoulder trying to assure her you'll find him. She stands up and gives you a quick but warm smile before showing Bruce to the lab.

You and Darcy watch Phil nearly make a fool of himself while he asks Steve to sign his near mint condition trading cards. Something you knew he was always proud to show off. They're interrupted when Jasper Sitwell gives them the location of the man you're looking for.

"Captain, Carter." Fury looks towards the both of you. "You're up." 

You both quickly nod and go off to change into your stealth suit. Once you're dressed you roll your shoulders trying to adjust to the feeling. 

Darcy walks up behind you with your sword in her hands. "I made sure no one put their hands on it since you left." 

You take the sword and unsheathe it. "Oh how I've missed you." You put it back and quickly attach it to the back of your suit.

Darcy gives you a hesitant look. "Are you ready?" 

You let out a breath. "Ready as I'll ever be." You both make your way to the quinjet to meet up with Natasha and Steve and head off to Stuttgart, Germany.

On the quinjet you stand near Natasha and Darcy in the hopes that you don't make an absolute fool of yourself in front of Steve. 

"Go over there." Darcy mumbles towards you.

"Darcy, shut up." You mumble back before looking behind you making sure he didn't hear you.

Natasha quietly laughs and rolls her eyes. "We're 5 minutes out prepare to land." 

You walk towards the back of the quinjet and stand next to Steve. "Hi." You mumble awkwardly.

"Hi." He looks down as he talks trying to avoid your gaze. "So. How long have you worked for S.H.I.E.L.D?" 

"Um, about 9 years. I started off in a lab and worked my way up." 

"That's good." He started flexing his hands. "So-." 

He was about to ask you something when he was interrupted by Natasha. "Alright, we're here."

He opened up the ramp and looked towards you. "See you down there." And immediately jumped after.

Before you could second guess yourself you followed his lead and jumped. When you land you see Loki knock Steve to the side. You quickly unsheathe your sword and swing towards Loki, he deflects your sword with his staff. Like second nature you continue to swing your sword and deflect his attack. All you hear is the clang from your sword hitting his staff. Before you can dodge it you feel his staff hit your back and knock you down. You hear Steve stand up and begin to fight Loki again. After a few good hits he's knocked down once again.

As you're about to get back up you see someone you hoped you'd never have to see again. "You've got to be kidding me." You sheathe your sword just as Loki raises his hands to surrender. You walk towards the quinjet hoping to ignore the thorn in your side that is Tony Stark.

You stand towards the front with Darcy and Natasha as they fly the jet back to the helicarrier. "I swear, if either of you knew about this-" Your hand starts to grip the back of their chairs.

"We didn't." Darcy looks up at you. "I know we didn't tell you about Steve but trust us, we would never keep this a secret." 

You start to calm down, you look up once you see flashes of lightning and roars of thunder. "Where did this come from?" There's a crash on top of the quinjet and you all look up.

Stark opens the ramp. Seconds after, you see a blond muscular man with a hammer enter before quickly grabbing Loki and jumping out. Immediately after you see Stark walk to the edge of the ramp and fly out of the quinjet, Steve grabs a parachute and prepares to jump as you quickly follow suit.

"I'd sit this one out guys." Natasha speaks up as she continues to pilot the quinjet.

Before you get a chance to respond you see Steve jump out of the quinjet head first, you follow his lead and jump out seconds later.

You both land in a forest, up ahead you see Stark and the man from earlier in the middle of a fight. Steve throws his shield and it ricochets off both their chests. "Hey!" He calls out to them. "That's enough! I don't know what you plan on doing here-." He continues before being interpreted by the blond man.

"I've come here to put an end to Loki's schemes." He speaks up in a commanding tone.

You hesitantly take a step forward. "Then prove it, put the hammer down."

"Uh, yeah! No! Bad call, he loves his hammer."

You glare at Stark and roll your eyes. He always had to make a joke of everything.

The man swings his hammer back and knocks Stark behind him. "You want me to put the hammer down?" He leaps up and swings his hammer preparing to strike.

You feel Steve pull you behind him as he raises his shield above your heads. When the two connect there is a loud boom and a flash of light. The four of you are thrown backwards.

You slowly start to get up and look at the destruction around you. "Are we done?"

You've all returned to the bridge of the helicarrier. The blond man who you've learned is Thor is telling you about Loki's plan with the tesseract. A chitauri army invading earth, you all continue to discuss it when Phil and Stark enter the room.

As always, Stark acts like the know-it-all he is, and tries to take charge. He starts messing with the screens in front of him when you notice him place a small disk under the desk. You look around but no one else seemed to have noticed what he did. 

You look towards Steve when he speaks up. "Does Loki need a particular type of power source?" 

"He'd have to heat the cube to a hundred and twenty million kelvin just to break through the coulomb barrier."

"Finally someone who speaks English." Tony walks up to Bruce. "It's good to meet you doctor banner, your work on anti-electronic collision is unparalleled. And I'm a huge fan of the way you lose control and turn into an enormous huge rage monster." 

You scoff and look towards tony. "Is everything a joke to you." 

He gives you a puzzled look. "Excuse me?" 

You walk towards him until you're face to face. "Everything is always a joke, you can never take anything seriously can you Stark?" 

"Tell me something, how do you think your parents would feel if they knew you turned yourself into a science experiment?" He knew what he was doing, what buttons to push to make you crack.

"Don't you dare talk about my parents, you lost that right 16 years ago." You grabbed him by the collar and slammed him against the wall. "I became the person I am today despite you and I know my parents are proud of me. You even try to talk about them again and I won't hesitate to break every single bone in your body."

Nick walked into the bridge. "Carter! Take a walk." 

You dropped him and walked out of the room with Darcy following.

"Come on. You can't let him get to you." She grabbed you by the shoulder and turned you around.

You ran your fingers through your hair in frustration. "I know, but it's just- as soon as I see him, all the hurt just comes flooding back."

"Close your eyes and breathe. We just gotta get through this." She pulls you into a hug.

Phil is walking towards you with a look of concern. "Hey, are you alright now?”

"I think so. Phil, be honest with me, did you know he was going to be here?" When you noticed that he was avoiding eye contact you knew.

He let out a deep breath before looking you in the eyes. "Yes, Fury sent me to drop off the information on what was going on and all of you.

You did your best to keep the tears at bay. Phil was the one person you should have been able to trust not to keep anything from you. "How could you, you knew exactly what him being here would do to me and you couldn't even give me a heads up."You shook your head and walked away. 

He was about to follow before Darcy stopped him. "Don’t, just give her time." 

You walked around and tried to give yourself time to cool off. If you couldn't trust Phil to be honest with you, who could you trust? You were so deep in thought you didn't notice you were about to bump into Stark. You glared at him before he cleared his throat and tried to walk around you. Before he could you grabbed him by the arm and slammed him against the wall.

"What's with all the slamming?" He tried to push you away before you pushed him back.

"I saw what you did, you attached something to the computer. I don't know what kind of game you're playing but it needs to stop. You and I both know I don't trust you so you better watch your back because the second you slip up, I'll be there." Before he could speak up again you let him go and walked off. 

You hear Natasha speak through your earpiece. "Loki means to unleash the Hulk. Keep Banner in the lab, I'm on my way. Send Thor as well." 

You immediately rush towards the lab, you see Nick and walk in behind him. "What are you doing Mr. Stark? You're supposed to be locating the tesseract."

"We are." Bruce speaks up. "the model’s locked and we’re sweeping for the signature now. When we get a hit, we’ll have the location within half a mile."

"And you’ll get your cube back, no muss, no fuss. What is Phase Two?" Tony questions Nick.

"Phase two? Nick what is he talking about?" You look towards him waiting for him to respond.

Before he does, Steve walks in and slams a large hydra gun on the table. "Phase Two is S.H.I.E.L.D using the Cube to make weapons."

You look at the gun in disgust and shake your head as you back away from Nick. "What is this? Why is S.H.I.E.L.D making weapons of mass destruction? This isn't right, this isn't what my grandmother wanted."

"Last year earth had a visitor from another planet who had a grudge match that leveled a small town. We learned that not only are we not alone, but we are hopelessly hilariously, out-gunned. They're not the only threat either. The world’s filling up with people who can’t be matched, they can’t be controlled. They forced our hand! So we had to come up with some-"

Before Nick was able to finish his explanation he was interrupted by Tony. 

"Nuclear deterrent! ’Cause that always calms everything right down.

You looked towards him, anger written all over your face. "Very hypocritical, coming from you."

"Remind me again how you made your fortune, Stark?"

"I’m sure if he still made weapons, Stark would be neck deep-"

"Wait-Wait! Hold on! How is this now about me?"

You scoffed. "Isn’t everything?"

Everyone continued to talk over each other. Arguing back and forth. It's suddenly interrupted when the monitor makes a noise, signaling the Tesseract has been located.

Bruce walks over to it when he seems to see something on the monitor. "Oh my god."

There's suddenly an explosion and you're all thrown across the room. You, Steve and Tony scramble to your feet and run out of the lab to try and find the source of the explosion.

You talk into your earpiece. "Hill we need an update."

"Engine three is down. The line looks mostly intact but it’s impossible to get out there to make repairs while we’re in the air. Somebody’s gotta get outside and patch that engine."

You nod towards Stark before responding. "We're on it." You look at the two men in front of you. "You two go ahead, I'll secure Loki."

You run in the other direction, dodging people in your way. You didn't notice the man around the corner, as you run your head is slammed with the butt of a gun knocking you down. When you look up you see a man aiming his gun at you about to shoot, before he does you quickly grab the pistol strapped to your hip and shoot him between the eyes. You get up and round the corner continuing to your destination. Further down the hall you hear two more men about to round the corner. Before they do you jump up and swing on a hanging pipe kicking one of the men down and against a wall before jumping down and throwing a roundhouse kick to the other. You shoot them both and continue running.

You're about to reach Loki's cell when you hear an explosion. You rush in and see Phil on the floor, blood on his chest. You drop your gun, run to him and drop to the ground. "No no no no no come on Phil stay with me, you're gonna be fine I just gotta get you some help." You reach for your earpiece but he grabs your hand and stops you.

"It's going to be okay kid, I promise." His eyes started to water and his breathing was getting shallower by the second. 

"Don't do this to me Phil, I've lost so many people I can't lose you too. You know I need you, I won't be able to do this without you." The tears were coming and they weren't stopping. 

"You're not going to lose me, I'll always be right here." He put a finger to your chest right above your heart. 

You grab on tight to his hand and put your forehead against his. "I love you, please don't leave me Dad."

You didn't notice the smile on his face when he heard that. "I love you too, I promise it'll be okay." 

You looked up when you didn't hear him anymore. "No, No!" You reach for your earpiece. "I need help.” Your voice started to crack. “Please, I need help in here!" You don't know how much time passed but you felt a pair of hands pulling you up but you refused to let go. "No I can't, I can't leave him." When they finally got you up, you saw it was Darcy holding you back. You broke down and she was there to hold you. You continued to cry, you heard Nick behind you notifying everyone about what happened. 

"Agent Coulson is down."

Legacy Tags:

@agentmarvel13 @1v-kayla @5sos-wdw @a-dancing-hufflepuff @agent-barnes40 @agreatcheesecakestudentstuff @annoylinglyaries @antclottz @avngrsinitiative​ @bradfordsgreekgod​ @babypink224221​ @captainam-erika-trash​ @carisi-sonny​ @caseymcflurry​ @chook007​ @cosmiccomicloverqueen @daniellajocelyn​ @doctoranon​ @ecamille-xo​ @editsbyjenny @ellieababy​ @eternaleviee​ @futuremissstark @geeksareunique​ @gummiwormsandonedirection​ @henrietteoaks​ @hermionie-is-my-queen​ @imahoeforbucky​ @ineedmorefanfics​ @isabella-bby​ @jaemingold​ @junitorials13​ @katykyll​ @keenmarvellover @klanceiscannon14​ @lady-sigyn​ @littlephoenix-fire​ @lovemarvelousfics​ @l0kisbitch​ @luckyfiction17​ @ludwigvonbaethoven @maddie-laufeyson​ @magnificentsoulecollector​ @mikariell95​ @mistressoftorture​  @moli1497 @nanajaeminniee @orderoftheflamingflamingos​ @oxodianaoxo​ @paintballkid711​ @pastelpurplexoox​ @peteyparkersbabyy @princessizzy36​ @shallowshawn @sillydecoy @spodermanpete​ @starstruckgardenstudentzonk​ @2132981​ @superhero2552​ @thatharrypotterfan13 @thatweirdchick147​ @the-ducks-umbrella @tienna-laufeyson16 @trustme3-13​ @wishiwasanavenger​ @xalinx​ @yougottalovefandoms​ @zaza-jones​ @izzyisavengersupernaturaltrash​

[shes-an-oddbird]

Christmas at River’s End Mall

Summary -  A Christmas AU in which everyone navigates their seasonal jobs, relationships and Christmas spirit, or lack there of, through woven together tales inspired by holiday prompts.

Chapter 10 - Ice Skating

Summary - May contemplates her relationship with Coulson while she skates and plans continue to be disrupted.

Prompt - Ice Skating Relationship - Philinda (+ some philindaisy) POV - May

May is not a mall person. Which is ironic, given that she has worked for this one for the majority of her adult life. Malls were too busy, to loud and too commercial. Its why she strived to make the mall an experience for people and not just a money pit. It was also why the mall had more boutiques and small businesses then nearly any other in the country. Still, she preferred the quiet of her office and only ventured out to supervise major events.

But an empty mall, before the crowds and the clatter of the day, well she didn’t mind that at all.

The day of the parade they always opened late. The parking lot was used for the float set up so until the last band marched its way out and on to the main road the mall was locked up tight to anyone who didn’t have a key.

Thankfully, she had one of those.

May doesn’t even check in at her office when she arrives that morning. She turns on the main lights, usually the work of the janitorial staff but they would be in late today as well. She makes her way down to the far end of the mall where the kids’ playground has been temporarily removed and replaced with the more favorable indoor ice rink.

It’s not much. The ice isn’t even real ice, but some ice substitute. Jemma had attempted to explain the science behind it, but it doesn’t matter much to her. It’s an improvement on the original. The second year she arranged the Santa experience Coulson suggested this new product. Slates that could be pieced together to create an indoor ice rink. At first she thought it was kind of ridiculous but he really wanted it so she let him have at it. It wasn’t like she would have to skate on it.

Until she did.

***

Daisy clung to the ice rink wall with her small gloved hands. “You’ll never learn if you don’t let go.” May warned her as she walked along from the outside.

“If I let go, I’ll fall.”

“Everyone falls down Daisy,”

“That’s not very reassuring.”

May shakes her head. “The most impressive thing you can do when you fall down on the ice, is get back up and keep going like it never happen,” Daisy looks up at her, wide eyed with realization before looking across the rink. She sets her eyes determinedly on a spot directly opposite her and pushes off the wall. She stumbles about halfway there before gliding a few feet and falling forward on her hands and knees.

She turns around so she’s sitting on her bottom instead and looks back at May like she waiting for something to happen. “What did I just say.” May calls out to her.

“I know what you just said but you didn’t teach me how to get up.”

May rolls her eyes. She is awfully snarky for a child.

“Alright, one minute.”

May looked down at the rink. She didn’t have skates with her but this wasn’t real ice anyways. She takes a careful step forward. Seemed safe enough. She walks along the wall till she was level with Daisy and cautiously walks her way to the center of the rink. With less grace than she would have liked she lowers herself on to the ice next to her.

Daisy smiles at her cheekily. “Okay, but now we’re both stuck in the middle of the rink.”

Oh yeah, she would be a handful.

May shows her where to position her skates and tells her how to distribute her weight and push herself back up on to her feet. She wobbles dangerously and May instinctively grabs her flailing hand before she can fall again. She would have to fall again eventually. But falling on the ice hurt like hell. She could save her that just once.

Daisy steadies herself and May releases her hand. Once more, she tries for the other side of the rink but this time she makes it successfully. Elation written across her face she pushes off again, back towards where she started, and May can’t fight back her own smile.  

She does realize quite suddenly that there is no graceful way for herself to jump back up on her feet without her skates. She struggles to stand, slipping several times in the process before hurrying off the rink. She smiles to herself when she sees Phil seated at a nearby bench watching them.

“Nice form out there.” He teases.

“I nearly fell three times.”

He shrugs. “Who said I was talking about the skating.”

Again, May struggles not to smile. “What are you doing here Phil?”

“She told me you were teaching her to skate.” Phil explains as they watch Daisy dart excitedly back and forth across the rink. “You’re doing a great job so far.”

“It would be easier if this was real ice.”

“Say the word and I’ll convert the old bookstore into a permanent rink for you.”

“The malls insurance policy will never cover that.” He brushes that off, offering to look into it and she can’t help but smile. He would find a way if she asked. He hadn’t disappointed her yet.

They’d become good friends since the start of it all. Coulson offered his services outside of the holiday season, his vast resources covering whatever project she took on. They often spent a lot of time together and eventually begin to match that work time with personal time together. They weren’t dates exactly but coffees here and there, lunches and more frequently, dinner and drinks.

“May watch.” Daisy skates past them and does a little hop. It’s not much but considering she was on the ground a minute ago she knows it feels like the greatest victory.

“She finally told me what she wants for Christmas.”

“Yeah, what’s that?”

“Pretty sure you already know.”

May does. Ever since Daisy had missed the event last year the idea had been nagging at the back of her mind, and Coulson had been nagging at her ear. At first it was a feeling of loss. She had been placed with a family, she might not even see the girl again. But knowing her history she had checked in with the orphanage a bit later and sure enough she was back.

It wasn’t exactly the order one usually did things in, but she knew she had a connection with Daisy. There was a balance of their differences and a harmony of their similarities. It would be a change but not an unwelcome one.

“You know if I do this,” she gestures to Daisy who has just skated past waving eagerly at the pair of them, “then this,” she gestures between them, “is on hold, I can’t take on a you and a her at the same time.”

“That’s okay, I can wait, for her sake, I can wait.”

***

And wait they did, maybe too long? May thought as she drifted across the ice rink. While neither had found the one for the long haul they had found other relationships. Her first and only major one since adopting Daisy had been with Andrew, a good man and a good psychiatrist. A balance to her but with a few too many differences. Phil too had found someone he cared for, a lovely woman named Audrey who she had liked and felt suited him well. But she had moved across the country to pursue her dreams and when she questioned why he didn’t go with her he just claimed that his home was here.

May tests her rusty skills and does a spin. There isn’t room to build up speed for any jumps but the urge is there. The feeling is still not quite the same as real ice but it’s pretty close.

“Excellent form.” She hears a voice call out. She opens her eyes that had fallen closed and spots Phil leaning against the wall.

“Mmhmm, are you talking about the skating this time?”                                   

“I could be, I’m not, but the skating is impressive.”

“What are you doing here Phil?” She slides to a stop in front of him.

“I knew you’d be here, thought we could enjoy the quiet together.”

“Because you’re so good with the quiet.”

“Harsh, you’ve been spending too much time with Daisy.”

“Well, maybe we should fix that.” May glides back to the break in the wall and steps out on the carpet. As she switches out of her skates, back into her boots Coulson comes to stand at her side.

“Got any plans for the day?” She shakes her head. There was nothing going on that she couldn’t leave Daisy in charge of. She was more than capable of handing anything and would be thrilled to take over if it meant she was taking the day off. “We could spend the day down by the water, maybe go for drinks later.”

“Sounds nice.” He holds out a hand to her and helps her off the ground. “Come on, I should run by the office first and check in.

As they walk through the mall, she can hear the last of the marching bands as they leave the parking lot. Janitorial staff is pattering about getting doors unlocked and gates are starting to go up on the shops. They make it down to the mall’s main entrance and are about to take the hallway down to the administrative offices when May stops.

Daniel Sousa is seated on a bench not far from the entrance. He jumps up when he sees her, hurrying over with a look of concern on his face.

“You’re here early, activities won’t start for a bit.” Coulson tells him.

“I know, I, actually I was supposed to meet Daisy here, we were going to watch the parade, but she never showed up.”

May tenses. “That’s not like her, Daisy has never missed the parade.”

“Are you sure she’s not here, I thought I saw her van outside, maybe she went down to join the crowd, did you call her?” Coulson suggests.

“I tried but it went to voicemail.”

May pulls her phone from her pocket, no longer listening to the pair exchange thoughts on where Daisy had disappeared to. She dials Daisy’s phone and it does jump straight to voicemail. “You’re sure you saw her car?” Coulson nods.

She could try Jemma. Maybe Daisy got a ride home with her last night. She doesn’t have her number saved but it would be on her employee file. She rushes down the hallway to her office, the door she finds in already unlocked and her heart skips.

“Daisy are you – in here.” Relief falls over her as she enters the office and finds Daisy asleep curled up in a tight ball on the small sofa in the corner. Daniel and Coulson stumble into the office behind her, she misses the relief on their own faces as she kneels next to the young woman. Her laptop is set up on the table and her phone has fallen to the floor. She gives her a gentle shake.

“Daisy, Daisy what are you doing in here?”

Daisy struggles to come around. May doesn’t think she’s aware of where she is even after she sits and takes in her surroundings. She brushes the hair out of her face and starts to look for her phone. “What’s going on.”

“I was going to ask you, why are you in the office?”

“I, I was here late last night, I – oh!” Daisy catches sight of Daniel and Phil and it seems to jolt her awake. “The parade, oh no, what time is it, are we late?” She asks, her search for the phone now frantic. May snatches it up off the ground and hands it to her but its not of any use, the battery is dead.

“Daisy the parade is over.”

“What?”

“Yeah, we’re getting ready to open everything up its nearly noon.” Coulson explains.

Daisy jumps up from the sofa and everyone lurches forwards as she sways and drops back down, sitting carefully at the edge of the couch. “Whoa, whoa.”

“Daisy?”

“I’m okay, just stood up too fast.” She insists. “I was here late, helping Jemma and then I had to get some work done and I thought it would be easier to just work here and then I was going to go home but I must have fallen asleep.”

“Have you been getting much sleep lately or at all?”

Daisy actually looks like she has to think about it. “Um, yes.”

“Daisy I swear I will go call Simmons right now.”

Daisy cringes. “Then no, not much.” She sighs heavily and sinks back into the cushions. “I can’t believe I missed it, I’m so sorry, I don’t usually break plans like this.” She says to Daniel.

“No worries, you should be getting some rest.” He reassures her.

“But the roof and the lights and the parade,”

“Its okay, its not Christmas yet, we’ll get there eventually.”

May takes a step back and waves Coulson over. “I have a feeling theirs aren’t the only plans on hold.” He says but gives her the same soft understanding smile Daniel gave Daisy.

“I’m going to take her home and make sure she rests for the rest of the day, can you – “

“I’ll stay here and cover for you guys.”

“Thank you Phil.”

“Anytime, but I’m holding you to it, the shore, the drinks.”

“I’ll be there, we've waited long enough."

[just-random-obsessions]

Funny Moments In Avengers 1 (this time with gifs!)

Find Thor 1 here

Find Thor 2 here

In hindsight, I probably shoulda done this either before or right after Thor 1 but I’m horrible at planning so. This post is going to be listing the humor in Avengers 1 and then giving some thoughts afterwards. Post starts underneath the tag list. If you want to be added/removed from the tag list, let me know.

Tag List: @fyrecrafted​ @lokijiro​ @nikkoliferous​ @miskiett​ @icyxmischief​ @iamanartichoke​ @juliabohemian​ @Official-and-unstable-satan @darthxerik​ @melodylnoelle​  @just-another-human-2019​ @fandomsfanfictions @mentallydatingahotcelebrity​ @cateyes315​ @burningarbiterheart​ @imnotacreepijustlikeyou​ @usedtobegoodfriend96​ @alexakeyloveloki​

Also, side note but I find it kinda interesting how the humor doesn’t start till several minutes after the film starts when the arms dealer guy is interrogating Natasha.

~ Arms dealer: “you listen carefully” Coulson: *bitch you listen carefully*

~ “I’m working! This idiot is giving me everything” “I don’t give her everything”

~ “Let me put you on hold” *Coulson waiting very quietly as he listens to Natasha’s hold music which consists of bones breaking*

~ “Oh I’ve got Stark. You get the big guy” *Natasha DEFINITELY saying “fuck” in a different language*

~ “Should’ve got paid up front Banner”

~ “Doctor we’re facing a potential global catastrophe” “oh no those I try to actively avoid”

~ “What does Fury want me to do [with the Tesseract]? Swallow it?”

~ “Is there anything you can tell us about the Tesseract? “You should’ve left it in the ocean

~ “Ten bucks says you’re wrong [about being surprised by new things]” *Steve later giving Fury $10*

~ “How does it look?” “Like Christmas but with more me”

~ “Give yourself some credit please. Give yourself 12% of the credit.” “12%?! Of my baby?!” “An argument could be made for 15”

~ “You have reached the life model decoy of Tony Stark. Please leave a message”

~ “Phil! Come in!” “Um his first name is Agent”

~ *I know nothing about the Avengers initiative but I do know that my boyfriend is a dick sometimes*

~ *Pepper saying something racy in Tony’s ear*

~ *Both of the men’s faces*

~ “The guy’s like a Stephen Hawking.” *?????* “He’s like a smart person”

~ “I watched you while you were sleeping” *wow I should’ve stayed in the ice cause this convo went sideways real quick*

~ *Loki straight up sassing the asshole who tortured him like the Queen he is*

~ “Did he ask you to sign his captain America trading cards yet?” Trading cards?” “They’re vintage. He’s very proud”

~ “Really? They want me in a submerged pressurized metal container”

~ “Oh no this is much worse”

~ “I mean, if it’s not too much trouble” “no no it’s fine”

~ *Loki bitch-slapping the guard in the face with the scepter*

~ *cap punches Loki and Loki’s bitch really face”

~ “Kneel!” “Not today!”

~ “Make a move Reindeer Games”

~ “Rock of Ages giving up so easy?”

~ “What’s the matter? Scared of a little lightning?” “I’m not overly fond of what follows?” *?????*

~ “Now there’s that guy”

~ “We need a plan of attack!” “I have a plan. Attack”

~ “You think yourself above them?” “Well yes dumbass”

~ “You listen well brother” “I’m listening”

~ “Doth mother know, you weareth her drapes?”

~ *Loki calmly watching them fight*

~ “Power at 400% capacity” “How bout that?”

~ “Let me know if ‘real power’ wants a magazine or something”

~ “He really grows on you doesn’t he?”

~ “An army. From outer space” *should’ve stayed in the ice cube*

~ “He killed 80 people in 2 days” “He’s adopted”

~ “No hard feelings Point Breaks, you got a mean swing”

~ “That man is playing Galaga! Thought we wouldn’t notice but we did!” *they later show the guy playing Galaga*

~ “How does Fury see these?” “He turns.” “Sounds exhausting”

~ “When did you become an expert in thermonuclear astrophysics?” “Last night”

~ *Tony and Bruce geeking out over science*

~ “Are you nuts?” “Jury’s out”

~ “Is everything a joke to you?” “Funny thing”

~ *Tony supporting Bruce by offering blueberries*

~ “The Stark tower? That big ugly-” *Tony’s face* “building in the sky?”

~ “Followings not really my style?” “And you’re all about style?” “Of the people in this room who is 1) wear a spangly outfit and 2) not of use?”

~ *Ancient powerful deity trying to describe what a Bilgesnipe is to a mortal*

~ “How is this now about me?” “I’m sorry isn’t everything”

~ “Big man in a suit of armor. Take that off and what are you?” “Genius billionaire playboy philanthropist”

~ *Tony and Steve arguing* “Put on the suit” “I’m not afraid to hit an old man”

~ *SHIELD gets attacked* “Put on the suit” “Yep”

~ “Is the sun coming up? Then put it on the left dumbass”

~ “It seems to work on some form of electricity” *I should’ve stayed in the ice*

~ *Tony speaking Science TM* “Speak English!”

~ “Target angry! TARGET ANGRY!!!!!!”

~ “Are you ever not going to fall for that?”

~ *After blasting Loki* “So that’s what it does”

~ *Master assassins who bite each other*

~ *Thor vs Windows episode 2*

~ “Cap hit the lever” “I need a minute here!” “LEVER!!! NOW!!!”

~ “Uh oh I’m fucked”

~ “Are you an alien?” “No” “Well then son, you’ve got a condition”

~ “Hey you guys aren’t authorized to be in he-” “Son, just don’t”

~ “Please tell me you’re going to appeal to my humanity” “Actually I’m planning on threatening”

~ *Tony very calmly “threatening” Loki*

~ “I have an army” “We have a Hulk”

~ “This usually works” “Well performance issues. It’s not uncommon 1 out of 5-” YEET

~ “And there one other person you pissed off. His name is Phil”

~ “Right. Army”

~ *Steve trying to stay safe in the jet as it falls to the ground* *I SHOULD’VE STAYED IN THE FUCKING ICE*

~ “Stark are you seeing this?” “Seeing. Still working on believing”

~ “You think you can hold them off?” “Captain, it would be my genuine pleasure”

~ “Just like Budapest all over again” “You and I remember Budapest very differently”

~ “Why the hell should I take orders from you?” *Cause I’m a fucking badass that why*

~ “Welp. We got his attention. What the hell is step 2?”

~ “So. This all seems horrible”

~ “I’m bringing the party to you” “I don’t see how that’s a party”

~ “That’s my secret cap. I’m always angry” *honestly tho Mood TM*

~ “Better clench up Legolas”

~ “And Hulk. Smash”

~ *Hawkeye not looking where he’s shooting and still hitting his mark*

~ “Well Thor’s taking down a squadron on 6th” “And he didn’t invite me”

~ *Hulk punching Thor out of the frame*

~ *Steve hiding his whole body behind his shield*

~ “I recognize that the council has made a decision but given that it’s a stupid ass decision I have elected to ignore it”

~ “Nat what the fuck are you doing?”

~ *Loki catches the arrow like a Badass TM but it still blows up in his face anyways cause Hawkeye is also a Badass TM*

~ “I am a god you dull creature and I will not be bullied by a-“ *gets smacked around like a rag doll*

~ “Puny god”

~ *Moans* (NOT LIKE THAT GET Y’ALL’S HEADS OUTTA THE GUTTER!!)

~ “Jarvis. You ever hear the tale of Jonah?” “I wouldn’t consider him a role model”

~ *ITS SHWARMA!!!! In the back ground!*

~ “You ready for another bout?” “What you gettin sleepy?”

~ *Hulk roaring to wake up Tony* “What the hell?”

~ “What just happened? Please tell me nobody kissed me!”

~ “Lets just not come in tomorrow. Let’s just take a day. You ever tried shwarma? There’s a shwarma place three blocks away. I don’t know what it is but I wanna try it.”

~ “If it’s all the same to you, I’ll have that drink now” *Tony smirking*

~ “Superhero’s in New York? Give me a break!”

~ *The Shwarma scene*

~ *Tony realizing he was scared back to life by the man on his left*

~ *Steve nodding off like the senior citizen he is*

~ *Thor eating literally everything on his plate*

~ *Clint and Natasha taking up each others personal space*

Alright some side thoughts. First of all, there’s no humor in the opening scene when Loki is stealing the Tesseract. I find this interesting as I see no reason for there not to be humor. Not complaining, just wondering.

Also, just like with Thor 1 & 2, there’s little to no humor when Thor and Loki are arguing. Whether it’s wen Thor breaks Loki out fo the jet after Stuttgart or when Thor and Loki are fighting on the Stark Tower, there’s barely any humor, if there’s even any humor at all.

[dvp95]

quiet on widow’s peak (15)

pairing: dan howell/phil lester, pj liguori/sophie newton/chris kendall rating: teen & up tags: paranormal investigator, mystery, online friendship, slow burn, strangers to lovers, nonbinary character, trans character, background poly, phil does some buzzfeed unsolved shit and dan is a fan word count: 3.2k (this chapter), 49.6k (total) summary: Phil’s got a list of paranormal experiences a mile long that he likes to share with the world. Abandoned buildings, cemeteries, and ghost stories have always called his name, and a particular fan of his has a really, really good ghost story.

read this chapter on ao3 or here!

"So," Phil starts, and then pauses. He has no real idea how to say this.

His parents wait patiently for him to gather his thoughts and his mum mutes the telly. Having their undivided attention doesn't really help, it just makes Phil sweat a bit. He can't even bring himself to sit down, too wired with anxious energy as he is.

The video has only been live for a day, but it's already one of Phil's most popular. People are clamoring in the comments for more; demands for proof and simple curiosity about what could explain his experiences. He's already had a call from Martyn about the benefits of going back and doing an update, but PJ and Sophie have put their two cents in as 'absolutely not'. Chris offered a don't care and then asked for Phil's mum's lasagna recipe.

Phil wants to stay. It's not so much about the mystery, for him, but he's pretty sure his friends and maybe even his brother already know that. He's got his own reasons for not buying a train ticket the moment the video went live and asking his divisive audience what they wanted him to do. Yeah, he'd been sort of hoping for this outcome.

He's not sure if he wants to stay for himself, for the stagnation that being here allows him, or if he wants to stay for deep dimples and a nice laugh. Probably a bit of column A and a bit of column B, if he's honest with himself.

"I uploaded the video on this case," Phil tells his parents. "And there were a lot of, um, unanswered questions. Because of that whole thing with the footage."

"Phil," his dad says, exasperation in his voice already.

"And that means more money from one case," Phil presses on, "because I don't have many expenses here and the ad revenue was really good in comparison to my last five videos. Martyn really thinks I should look into this some more. I promise I won't be here for months or anything, I just - just give me another week. Please, I just need a week."

Money talk usually gets his parents to back down a bit, but they exchange a long look between them that convinces Phil it isn't going to work this time. His mind is already whirring quickly, trying to settle on arguments that it thinks might win him this battle. He considers telling them that this is more than just a video to him, that his whole future feels like it's resting on this one mystery, but he has a suspicion that they wouldn't be very impressed with that lack of foresight. He's ready to bring out specific numbers when their silent communication breaks and his mum gives him a small smile.

"Phil," she says, echoing his dad with a bit more warmth and a lot more pity. "You know we need to talk about this, dear, why don't you sit down?"

He shakes his head and shoves his hands into his hoodie pockets so they don't see the trembling. He's not scared, he's just anxious, and his brain and body are conspiring to make him feel like he's going to die if something unexpected happens.

Phil doesn't like change. He doesn't like seeing his childhood house like this, he doesn't like having his career up in the air, and he doesn't like the way his parents no longer trust him to do what's best for himself. The worst part is that he's not even sure they're wrong - Phil knows he isn't thinking logically right now, that Martyn is the one who even mentioned ad revenue while Phil was busy wondering how best to prove himself.

"I'm good," says Phil. He hopes that the nerves aren't as palpable as they feel to him.

"Okay, well," his mum says, briskly rearranging things on the coffee table like she has to be doing something with her hands while they talk about this. He's reminded a bit of Dan in the coffee shop, of Chris in the attic, and he wonders what it is about him that makes people need to split their focus like that. "Your dad and I have been talking."

"About how I need to grow up?" Phil offers, heart in his throat. It feels like he might laugh or cry at any moment. "Yeah. I've noticed."

"We're retiring, Phil," his dad says. That's not exactly news to Phil - he knows why they're selling the house, after all - but he bites his tongue and lets his dad speak. "We've understood the... unstable nature of your work for several years now, but we can't keep bailing you out whenever you have a bad month. You're a smart man and you've got a good degree, you should have something steadier under your belt."

"We love how creative you are," Phil's mum chimes in. It almost sounds like they've practiced this. Phil bites down harder. "And if you can channel that creativity in a way that isn't so dangerous, you'll have our full support."

Phil kind of wishes that he already had their full support, but he's already had this conversation with himself. The work isn't fun for him anymore, and the risk of getting arrested for trespassing isn't a low one. It's almost not worth it when he doesn't have that full-blown excitement about a case.

He doesn't need every haunt to have a nice ending wrapped up with a bow, but he does need to like the content he's producing. Otherwise there isn't any point to it.

Still. It sucks to hear.

Phil deflates a little bit. His automatic defensiveness that springs up whenever his parents start questioning his many bad decisions in life is fading to something that feels like bone-deep exhaustion. The anxiety is still there, thrumming under his skin, but there's nothing he can really do about that. The truth is that he's been feeling listless and defeated and trapped for a lot longer than he's been back in his parents' house. There's no real point in pretending otherwise.

"Give me a week," he repeats, quiet. "I want to finish this project either way, y'know? Just let me stay for the rest of this week and - and if it doesn't pan out, if I don't find anything new, then... then I'm done. I'll stop. I'll find something else."

"Are you sure, sweetheart?" his mum asks. The relief that pulls at her shoulders and her pursed lips is enough for Phil to be sure.

"Yeah," says Phil. He gives them a little shrug. "I'm comfortable with what I'm doing. I like making videos and exploring places with cool stories, and even talking to people has been getting better. But you're... you've got a point. I can't keep doing this forever. Not at the pace and quality I like to maintain. If this video goes well, it might help me break into a more diverse and less dangerous niche, which would make everyone happy, I think."

His dad nods at him. "Okay. You can stay until Sunday, because that's when we're going to the Isle. You can do whatever editing and post-production stuff you need to when you get back to Brighton. We'll expect a call when you know for sure what you're going to do, Phil."

Phil swallows, clenches his fists tighter in his pockets. "You'll be the first to know."

--

Nobody asks Phil to leave, but he can't stay in the aggressively neutral version of his parents' house and field their 'casual' questions about what sort of things he might want to do if YouTube doesn't work. He escapes to the city again, sending a message to Dan on the bus. Instead of asking if they want to hang out with him, he simply asks where he can meet them today. As if it's a given that they're going to be spending time together.

Maybe that's presumptuous of him, but Dan uses an exclamation mark when they reply, im at home!, so Phil thinks it's probably fine.

Dan meets him at the door this time, mid-ramble about the broken dishwasher in their flat as if social niceties are no longer expected of them. That suits Phil. He grins back at Dan and joins them in the small but tidy galley kitchen, letting Dan talk his ear off while they scrub at some discoloured Tupperware.

"Sorry," Dan interrupts themself, turning big and apologetic eyes on Phil like they've just registered that he's standing there. "I'm having a weird brain day. Bit all over the place, you know."

"That's fine," Phil says honestly. He smiles, because Dan doesn't look all that convinced by it. "No, really, I don't mind. I like listening to you talk."

The blush spreads across Dan's face too quickly for them to hide by turning away. They try, anyway, and Phil is left looking at their face in profile, turned down and rosy as it is. "Normally I at least break for breath. What's new with you?"

"Since two days ago?" Phil teases. Dan's dimple makes an appearance right before the smile splits their face, and Phil has to twist his own fingers together so he doesn't reach out and poke at it. He's still working through some stuff, still doesn't want to make any decisions about this without thinking it over carefully, but he's never been good at resisting temptation either. "Uh, not much. My parents are still on my case. I'm getting good feedback on the video, but you probably know that already."

"It was a good video," says Dan. They pause as they dry their big hands on an old tea towel. "I... appreciate you saying that stuff about me."

"I didn't say anything that wasn't true."

Dan meets his eyes again, almost stubbornly ignoring the colour in their own cheeks. "I can appreciate things that you think are true, dingus. Take the gratitude already."

Phil grins. "Never."

--

There are snacks after that and some video games that Phil loses spectacularly and some good ferret snuggles. As the afternoon turns to evening, Phil watches Dan rearrange some titles on the bookshelf as they chatter about one of their science-y classes, no longer self conscious about how much they're talking. He's sitting on Dan's soft, unmade bed with Pixel, who keeps rolling around in the sheets like she's trying to get comfortable.

Phil is already comfortable. It's hard for him to ignore that Dan's bedroom feels so much like a safe haven in the way that his old house no longer does.

At some point Dan gives up on whatever system they were trying to implement. They pick Tofu up off the floor and flop onto the bed with Phil, wiggling around in almost the exact same way Pixel had. Phil presses his lips together tightly so he doesn't laugh.

"I think that things can be improved," Dan is saying, and Phil tries to figure out if they're still talking about the environment or if Dan has picked up the loose thread from their earlier rant about Bethesda. Pixel and Tofu are both running around like Dan and Phil are just bony jungle gyms, and Dan barely even stutters when one of them steps on their nose. "Of course they can be improved, it's not something you just give up on when things get tough, but the problem is that the people in charge have to implement the changes that are necessary for improvement, and - ow, that's my ear, don't bite that - and, uh... where was I?"

"You were telling me about climate change," says Phil. "Or potentially Todd Howard's ambivalence towards a quote-unquote 'perfect game'. I honestly lost track."

For a moment, Dan is quiet. Phil's anxiety rears its head for the first time since he got here, but luckily he hasn't stuck his foot in his mouth this time - Dan starts laughing, more or less cackling, and they roll closer to Phil to bury their face in a pillow.

Phil grins and reaches out to tug at one of Dan's curls, fascinated by the way it just springs back into place. He's done this to PJ once or twice or six times, but he's usually had a couple drinks before he resorts to it. Dan comes out of hiding with tears of laughter welling up in their pretty brown eyes and their dimples in full force, grinning up at Phil like he's the funniest person in the world.

"Those are both really important issues," Dan says, trying their best to sound deadpan when they're so obviously gleeful.

They wiggle around again and Phil says, "You look exactly like Pixel when you do that."

He's pretty sure that Dan honks at that, but he's immediately distracted by a ferret trying to bite his eyebrow.

This is good. Phil likes this. He's trying to dig himself out of the mindset that he'd backed himself into when he first started noticing Dan, because PJ might have had a point. Okay, so PJ definitely had a point, and Phil has been a bit of an idiot.

He won't know for sure how Dan feels about him being gay and uncompromising about that fact unless he asks, and he doesn't think he's ready to do that just yet. But there's a rainbow flag on Dan's wall and they don't consider themselves not not a guy, so... Phil thinks that maybe he's been assigning a strictness to Dan's own relationship to gender and sexuality that isn't actually there.

Dan is talking again, to their ferrets this time, and Phil is almost overwhelmed by the force of affection that washes over him now that he isn't trying so hard to hold it back. Dan's leg is pressed against his own and they're holding Pixel up like they're playing airplane with her and Phil likes them so goddamn much.

"Did you want to," Phil starts, interrupting Dan's musing about what goes on in a ferret's tiny brain. Dan looks up at him with such genuine happiness on their face that Phil's words stick in his throat. He should be asking if Dan wants to go out for dinner again or if they've seen whatever blockbuster action film is playing in cinemas this week, but that's not what comes out of his mouth. When Dan raises their eyebrows quizzically, what Phil ends up asking is, "Uh, come spend the night in the haunted house with me?"

Great. Real romantic.

--

Dan doesn't make a secret about how much they hate this plan. They say it over and over, but they don't take any of the outs that Phil offers them.

"I hate this plan," Dan says as they make a bunch of sandwiches. It seems like way too much for just the two of them, but Phil isn't about to say no to having a near endless supply of peanut butter and bread when they're stuck in a dusty attic again. "This is stupid. You should have just left it at the first video, Phil, that was fine."

"You don't have to come with me," Phil reminds them for the umpteenth time.

Dan glares. "No, I'm coming."

"You're a very complicated person," says Phil.

With a heavy sort of sigh, like they've been dealing with Phil for years instead of a week, Dan finally sets the peanut butter down. "Look," they say, pointing the dull knife at Phil for emphasis. "I can hate this plan and still want to make sure you don't get fucking arrested or possessed or trip down the stairs or something. PJ knows where I live."

"I think he'd be in the camp of me deserving it if I died in the Wilkins place," Phil says, his lips tugging into a grin. "But thank you."

"Yeah, yeah," Dan mutters. "Will you at least tell me why we're going back? I know you're fucking stubborn and all, but I didn't figure you for someone who beats dead horses."

"Oh, that's a terrible idiom," Phil says, mostly to himself. He reaches out to squeeze Dan's shoulder when he sees them get all huffy at the apparent avoidance. The tension leaving Dan's body under his palm is frustrating to feel, because there's nothing Phil wants more than to lean into it. The problem, of course, is that he really does need to talk to Dan before he starts trying to hug them in their own kitchen. Phil lets his hand drop awkwardly between them and shrugs. "Well, uh. This is the first time in a long time I've actually been excited about a project. And that makes me think that maybe I've worn out my welcome here. Not... not here like Manchester here, but here like... my job, here."

Dan leans their hip against the counter and looks at Phil with their brow all furrowed. "This is an ultimatum," they say. "Like, to yourself."

"Yeah," says Phil. "I need to solve this - or at least find something else that I can show to people. Because if I don't, then I need to actually look at myself and admit I'm not doing something I like anymore."

"It sounds like you're already looking at yourself," Dan says quietly.

"I guess."

"No, you are," Dan insists, their voice stronger now that they can assert an opinion. "Trust me, I'm a pro at unproductive self-reflection and existentialism. Who am I, what does it all matter, I know the song and dance. And I don't think that getting more footage is going to erase what you're already thinking, Phil. Tell me if I'm out of line, whatever, but if you want to do something else with your life then just do something else with your life."

The automatic defensiveness threatens to make Phil snap back at Dan that this isn't any of their business, but he's had a lot of practice in keeping his negative thoughts to himself. He gives Dan a little humourless smile and shrugs his shoulders.

"You're twenty-one," Phil says. "And a student. I don't really expect you to get it."

Dan puts their hands on their hips like they're settling in for a proper row, but instead they just say, "I know. I don't know what you're going through, sure, I doubt anyone knows what anyone else is going through at any time. And, yeah, I've got another year before I have to worry about my career. But I've made some fucking tough decisions in my life, mate. I dropped out of my law course after two lectures. I don't talk to my family anymore. I've tried on so many different names and labels that it would make your head spin. You don't like your job anymore, and one video isn't going to change that."

"Yeah, probably not." Phil looks down at their little collection of sandwiches, feeling lost and stubborn and a bit scared about how much Dan sees him. "But I have to try, y'know? I can't just give up. I have to try."

There's a long moment of silence. Then, Dan sighs.

"Okay. Put these in a container, we don't use unnecessary plastic in this flat. Just whatever they fit in. I'll make some coffee for the road and find our Scrabble board."

[banashee]

Part 3/7

-

 "What do you mean, you LOST Steve?!"

 “In my defense, he’s tiny!”

 “ So are you!”  

 Tony puffs up his chest like a peacock, trying to make himself look bigger than the scrawny 12-year old that he currently is. Besides, that answer is kinda hypocritical, given that Clint himself is only 1 and a half inches taller than Tony is at the moment - or any given moment, actually. Even when Clint isn’t currently a teenager, that half-inch in particular seems to be important to him.

 Tony is about to spit out a rebuttal for that comment about being tiny, but the older boy looks at him in utter confusion and disbelief, quiver dangling from his arm while he gestures through the air. Clint has no idea what’s going on.

 All he knows is that he went shooting arrows and when he arrived upstairs, everything is in utter chaos and he’s being dragged through the hallway by Tony who keeps yelling that Steve is lost and they need to find him. And now they’re here, somewhere in the tower and not any smarter than before.

 With a sigh, Phil interrupts their bickering. Just like Clint, he doesn’t know what is even happening. But since he is one of the designated parent-adults, it’s on him to figure this out. One would think that he’s gotten used to this in the last few weeks. After all, most of the team is living their lives as kids for the better part of a month now, but with these humans around him, Phil knows, things are never quiet for long, no matter their age.

 He has the remarkable ability to stay calm in pretty much any situation. He’s got this.

 “Boys, please. I’ve been gone for like 30 minutes, can anyone explain to me what happened here while I was gone?” While he finishes the sentence, Phil bats off the slowly extending arm of a plant that’s trying to eat his sleeve. The thing has taken over most of the floors occupied by the Avengers, spreading out at an alarming speed. Who knew that venus fly traps could be this… Invasive?

 Clint shrugs helplessly. As confused as he is, he is worried about Steve.  Because Tony is right,      Steve is tiny    , but it doesn’t stop him from seeking out all sorts of trouble. The main issue is probably that Steve manages to look completely innocent and adorable, even when he is about to set fire to something just to see what happens. It’s an issue.

 “I don’t know, I’ve been shooting arrows downstairs. Then Tony came running and yelling about Steve being lost and I don’t know what’s happening. Tony?”

 The younger boy looks uncomfortable, chewing on his lower lip and eyes flickering back and forth.

 “Okay, so I know this sounds bad…” Hesitating for a moment, he looks up at Phil. The plant is sneaking up at them again, and Phil shoves it off - he would very much like to know how this much chaos ensured in such a short timespan, but then again, he’s learned lately that the kiddie-versions of the Avengers are, naturally, even more of a human tornado than usual.

 Phil can also tell that Tony seems to feel guilty about something - he, as well as everyone else, has opened up a bit by now, but the trust issues are still very much present. Right now, he avoids looking him in the eyes.

 “Please tell me what happened. No one is mad, we just need to know what is going on so we can help. And find Steve. How did he get lost?.”

 Tony sighs, then he starts talking to the slowly extending venus fly trap next to Phil’s head, keeping his eyes focused on the plant while he explains as quickly as possible what happened.

 “Okay, so I was in the lab with Bruce…”

 *+~

     Normally, the labs would have been off-limits for kids of their age. But then again, it would be more than a little far-fetched to call any of the Avengers “normal”, no matter how old they are. As it is, both Tony and Bruce are both highly intelligent and easily bored, although Bruce isn’t really one to voice that latter part out loud. He simply tries to find any kind of occupation that he can, which usually ends up being whatever book he can get his hands on.  

     Being quiet and invisible is what he does best. Knowing his file and the environment he grew up in, it doesn’t exactly surprise anyone, but they do worry about him.  

     Right now though, he seems to be happy enough.  

     Science is fascinating, and getting to share the excitement and    learning new things      with an older friend like Tony, is… Amazing.  

     As soon as the fear and weariness from the beginning of their age regression has worn off a bit, the two of them are oftentimes attached to the hip.  

     Tony himself had never really had friends before, especially friends he could share his excitement with. School is school, but his classmates are quite a few years older than him and don’t really care about hanging out with a 12-year old.  

     Meeting Bruce is like meeting a younger, much more quiet version of himself, and that is both    fascinating       and wonderful. The two of them get along beautifully.  

     Surprisingly, it doesn’t take long for them to get permission to use the science labs in the tower, although there are some general ground rules set and Phil and Thor quickly remove anything that might be too dangerous for the children to be around.  

     It works out, until this one day, when they come across a hidden drawer full of glass bottles.  

     To be fair, no one, besides probably the adult-versions of Tony and Bruce knew about that one, and the kids don’t really mean anything by opening it - Tony bumps into the side of the table with his knee on accident, and suddenly the drawer opens up.  

     “Ow! Oh hey, look at this!”  

     “What is it?” Bruce looks up from his experiment when he hears a bump and the older boy say “ow!” but then he sees what Tony is pointing at.  

     “Oh!” He climbs off of the chair - jumping really since his feet dangle in the air when he’s sitting on it. As soon as Bruce hits the floor, only a bit of hair is visible over the edge of the table.  

     “What’s in there? Are we even supposed to use this?”  

     “It doesn’t say… Hold on.”  

     Tony is curious, pulling out a few of the bottles to investigate their contents from the outside. Bruce on the other hand is getting nervous, uncertainty strong.  

     “We, uh, I think we should put this back. If it was hidden…” he trails off, chewing on his lower lip and shuffling his feet.  

     For a moment, Tony looks like he wants to argue with that, but then thinks better of it. Bruce is probably right. He is aware that being allowed in here without supervision is a privilege and he doesn’t want to jeopardize it, even though his curiosity is nagging at the back of his brain.  

     “Yeah, okay, you’re right.” He is about to just pack everything back where it was, but then it happens.  

     Tony knocks over one of the vials on the table by accident and jumps to catch it in time before it rolls off of the edge and hits the ground. Naturally, while doing so, he knocks over the remaining two and in a series of unfortunate events, glass breaks, and strange liquids mix up. Rushing to clean it all up, a few drops of the concoction drip into a nearby flower pot, and then everything happens way too fast. In a matter of minutes, the venus fly trap has grown unnatural amounts, and then two boys scramble to get out of the room.  

  ~+*

 “...So, an unknown substance got into a houseplant down there, it kind of mutated, spread out, infected other plants on the way. And now we can’t find Steve anywhere in this jungle?”

 Phil sums it all up, admittedly assuming that last part, but it’s not far-fetched at all.

 He is quickly walking alongside the two boys as they try to make their way through the mess.

 “Uhm - yeah, pretty much.” Tony admits sheepishly, looking guilty as he pushes his way past another snapping head of venus fly trap. “We didn’t know where he was before, and now we can’t find him anywhere.” He looks guilty and miserable.

 “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to, I promise.” he adds, careful not to sound too defensive, but not very successful.

 “It’s okay, Tony, I believe you.” the boy in question doesn’t look entirely convinced, but he nods nonetheless. It doesn’t escape Phil’s attention that Tony takes all of the blame to himself, leaving Bruce completely out of it. But he is nowhere to be seen, so he needs to ask,

 “Do you know where Bruce is right now? I’d rather keep everyone close together at the moment.”

 “He went to tell Thor when we realized we couldn’t find Steve. I think they’re already looking for him, together with Nat, so I ran to get Clint…”

 “You did the right thing. Now let’s go find the others.”

 The three of them make a run for it, and finally, when they round a corner, there is Thor with Bruce, Nat and Lucky in tow.

 “Any success?” Phil asks, worried, but glad that at least the rest of the family is together.

 “Not yet, but we’re onto something. This way!” Thor adds, pointing in the direction where Lucky is shuffling with his nose on the floor.

 “Wait, you’re letting Lucky search for him? That’s genius!” Clint pipes up, and it’s the first thing he’s said in a while. But his love and adoration for this dog has been clear from the second he’d set eyes on him.

 “It was Nat’s idea!” Bruce offers proudly, while Thor is holding up one of his sweaters that was clearly the source of scent for the dog. Nat is beaming next to them.

 The little girl had shaken her head no everytime someone would call her “Natasha”, always correcting that it was  “Natalia”. The nickname didn’t take long at all to establish itself, and she seems to be more and more comfortable here every single day.

 From the start, she’d spent most of her time either lurking in doorways or behind a corner, just watching everyone else around her, unsure how to interact or ask for anything. As young as she is, distrust and uncertainty of the people around her are a long standing habit already and it’s heartbreaking to think about.

 The language barrier isn’t nearly as much of a problem as they’d thought - clearly, the Red Room starts teaching the girls other languages early on, making it easier to blend in. Now, spending so much time in America, Nat picks up more and more of the language every day, soaking up knowledge like a sponge.

 But then again, she is also slowly warming up to them - the first person she latched onto had been Clint - if this has anything to do with subconsciousness or simply the fact that on the day they got turned into kids, he was busy throwing sharp and heavy objects on any adult trying to grab them, they’re not quite sure.

 Unsurprising to anyone who knows the two as adults, they are a package deal, no matter the circumstances.

 Clint himself, being the oldest of the kids, is both paranoid and protective - it has taken him by far the longest to warm up to any adult, even Phil and Thor. He’s okay with being around them, and even talking a bit lately because they’ve made it clear that they won’t force him or any of the other kids to do anything, and won’t come close unless given explicit permission. It works out better than expected, although it is still very much a work in progress.

 None of this will stop him from putting himself in between the younger kids and anything that might possibly be a threat.

 Right now, all of them have one collective concern though: find Steve.

 As sweet and polite as he is, that boy is trouble. He’s curious, in general but especially here in this entirely new and exciting time for him.

 To be fair, Avengers Tower is an adventure for everyone who comes here for the first time. For a 10 year old boy coming straight from 1928 it must be like living in a science fiction novel.

 Regardless: this is the very same boy who thinks it is a good idea to climb out of windows and explore the outside of the tower, only to be picked up by a very confused and concerned Spider-Man, putting him back inside and shouting down a hallway,

 “Hey Folks, I picked up a very small and very brave boy from your rooftop! Does he belong to anyone? hellooohoo?!”

 So, yeah. This is indeed a very concerning situation, especially with a mutated giant plant in the house that takes over everything it can reach.

 Only a few minutes later, their search for Steve ends with Thor wrestling aside a particularly nasty piece of plant, Lucky barking excitedly and making a run to lick all over Steve’s face, who indeed, sits on the ground, unharmed and completely unconcerned. His notepad and a few colored pencils are scattered around him, the green on the paper indicating that he might have tried to draw the venus fly trap that’s currently resting one head on his shoulder.

 A shout of relief runs through the entire group, and Phil can only barely restrain himself from tackling the goddamn plant and pry it off of Steve. Whenever this whole age regression thing ends, Phil is pretty damn certain he’ll have lost whatever is left of his hair from stress at that point.

 “Hi!” The bright smile on the little boy’s face when he greets the others is like the sun coming up. Steve carefully strokes the venus fly trap head on his shoulder, then reaches to the side and pulls away with a fork full of what looks like meatballs. Everyone else just stares for a moment, because what?

 “Steve!”

 “Steve! Oh my god!”

 “Thank the allfather, you’re okay!”

 “Uh.      Are     you okay?”

 “What the fuck.”

 “Language!”

 “Are you…      Feeding     this thing??”

 The questions come out in a messy jumble at the same time and Steve beams up at them.

 “Oh, yes, I’m fine! This is Cleopatra, by the way. I figured, a plant this alive should have a name, right?”

 “...You… Named      and     feed this thing. OK, cool. What the hell is going on?”

 Phil blinks a few times, collecting himself. Everyone seems to be at a loss for words, but at least, all kids are safe and alive, and honestly, that’s probably all they can ask for at the moment. He’ll be bald by the end of the month, Phil is sure of it.

 “So… What are we going to do about this?” someone asks, and the room is in silence for a minute or two.

 Lucky is on his back, letting Steve rub his belly. Then, a leaf is slowly creeping up at him and the dog jumps, growling and putting himself in between the plant and the boy.

 This is probably their cue to do something.

 Together, all of them walk towards the end of the hallway. They’re not that far from their general living area, but there is a bit of space left, several doors leading to different rooms.

 “You. Stop eating my jacket.” Phil scolds the plant and pulls it away from his sleeve. At this point, it’s useless to do so since there are more fabric scraps than actual sleeves hanging off of his shoulder at this point. Still, it’s a matter of principle.

 The plant didn’t grow eyes, but Phil swears, if it did, it would have glared at him. Weirder things have happened here.

 “I think we should somehow contain this beast, lest it’ll take over everything” Thor points out, carefully picking up a potted cactus from the windowsill, but too late - it snarls at him and he holds it away from himself as it makes its way towards his beard. He smiles at the thing, slightly shaking his head.

 As much as he likes the chaos that comes with his teammates turned into kids, this is getting out of control.

 “Agreed. We just need to find a room…” Phil trains off, looking down the hallway and weighting out their options.

 “We never use the room in the back.” Steve points out, holding out the last meatball on a fork for Cleopatra to eat. She inhales the offering in record speed and then burps loudly.

 “I’m still not sure if this” Clint gestures with his elbow towards the empty plate, since he’s otherwise occupied with wrestling one of the larger plant parts together with Lucky, who is biting at it to keep it away from the kids, “is a good idea or another problem.”

 “Definitely not a good idea. But I honestly don’t care as long as it keeps this thing happy long enough for us to store it somewhere.” Phil grabs a handful of another plant, the mutated Monstera in his way and makes his way to the end of the hallway.

 “Her name is Cleopatra!”

 “Alright, as long as      Cleopatra     is happy for long enough to put her in a contained room, I’ll be happy.”

 Phil will probably have to pay for this in the near future - but for now, he really doesn’t give a fuck. All that matters to him is that the kids are all safe and everyone is back together.

 The seven of them spend a significant amount of their afternoon stuffing plants into the office, and when they close the door again, pushing in the leaves and extending heads of Cleopatra the Venus Fly Trap in an attempt to stop them from leaving the room, they simultaneously let out a big sigh of relief.

 A few days later, the kids are busy kneading cookie dough in the kitchen, with Thor by their side and Phil working on his laptop in a corner, listening with one ear and smiling every now and then. It’s been a fairly uneventful day so far, which for them, is always a good thing.

 They laugh, bicker and argue just like any big family would, teasing one another, stealing bits of chocolate and dough from the next person and generally having a blast.

 It’s a good day, and they hope that they’ll get more of those in the foreseeable future, until there is a cure for the spell that will turn everyone back into an adult.

 More or less secretly, both Thor and Phil want to make sure that their friends get to collect some nice childhood memories. Neither of those children has had an easy upbringing they know, and even though they are unsure if it’ll even work, it doesn’t stop them from trying. They love these people and they love spending time with them, one way or another.

 “You dropped something!” Steve laughs, accompanied by the sound of Lucky shooting up from his blanket and in between their feet to catch the bit of dough. Thankfully, there is no chocolate in it, because no one can move fast enough to stop the dog from inhaling it.

 “Too late. Oh well.” Clint bends down to Lucky, and is greeted with doggy breath and what Lucky considers a proper greeting - slobbering all over his face.

 “This is not good for you, boy. I love you still.” he tells the dog, and holds his hands out of reach before Lucky decides it would be a good idea to lick them, too. They’re still covered in baking ingredients, after all.

 Suddenly, the elevator makes it’s usual ‘pling’ sound, indicating that someone arrived just now. Just a moment later, a surprised yelp sounds from somewhere in the hallway, followed by

 “What the hell?!” in Pepper’s voice, and then, much, much louder:

 “PHIL!”

 The man in question looks up from his laptop, blinking. Slowly, very slowly he gets up from his seat.

 “Poop with knives.”

 The kids turn around with regretful expressions and a silent “Oh shit” mirroring each other in their faces - it looks about right. Even Thor looks like that, although he pats Phil on the shoulder apologetically, leaving behind a large handprint with flour on his sweater.

 “Ah, the wrath of Lady Pepper. Farewell, dear friend.”

 Phil sighs on his way out.

 “You got this, Phil! Sorry!” one of the kids calls after him, and it actually makes him huff a laugh.

 “I’m really feeling the love there, guys. See you, later.”

 The smile that Pepper greets him with is sugary sweet and murderous. One of her sleeves looks like it’s been gnawed on by a vicious venus fly trap…

 “Pepper, hi. I’m terribly sorry about this, but I’m sure we can find a solution…”

*+~

23 - Hiding

[shirtlesssammy]

10x22: The Prisoner

Hey Guys! We’re finally done with recapping all of Andrew Dabb’s episodes this week. For the rest of hiatus we’re doing a mix of favorites and not-so-favorites (*cough* finally addressing some of the Buckleming episodes *cough*) Six weeks until the final season. Agh!

Shreveport, Louisiana

Nerd Boy Styne leaves school only to be harassed by local burnouts. They want to know how much of a virgin he is (um, is there a gradient on that?) (Natasha: Virginity. Is. A. Construct.) Nerd Boy bites back HARD which does not sit well with Alpha burnout.

He’s pushed to the ground but is “saved” by his older brother. I get the feeling that he’d rather take his chances with the burnouts.

Later, Alpha Burnout is enjoying his Slushy and stayin’ alive when he notices a car following him. He takes off but runs into Older Brother Styne. Styne #2 creeps up and puts a plastic bag over his head and bye bye burnout.

*FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKK ALERT*

Sam and Dean are building Charlie’s pyre. We get flashbacks as they burn her body. Sam tries to say some words but Dean is full of rage and doesn’t want to hear it.

He even goes so far to tell Sam that he should be on that pyre instead of her. Oh boy. He tells Sam to stop what they’re doing to help him. The Mark isn’t going to kill him. Meanwhile, he WILL find who killed Charlie and end them all.

Nerd Boy Styne is busy playing video games and chatting with a friend. He has plans on moving to LA, but can’t tell his family because they’re scary and will kill him. His older brother lets him know their father wants to see him.

Cut to the elder Styne (listen, I HATE this storyline, I HATE that they killed Charlie, I HATE it all. I am not putting any effort into finding out any of their names. They’re all just Styne #1-4 to me.) He’s berating Styne with no arm about not getting the book and losing his arm. He tells his father about the bunker’s lore.

First, he’s got to get a new arm, so they bring in Nerd Boy (Fine, Nerd Boy can have a name-- it’s Cyrus) and show him Alpha Burnout and tell him to carve him up. He doesn’t want to. Jesus, his dear old dad says he’s going to do this or his dad will do it and then he’ll tie up Cyrus and do the same to him. W o W.

Dean calls another hunter, Rudy, about a lead on the Stynes.

Cas and Rowena continue to work on the Book of the Damned.

For Too Much Beauty in One Shot Science:

Sam comes back and wordlessly tells Cas that Charlie is gone. Sam then says that Dean knows and that he promised Dean that he would shut down their little plan. Rowena, still the delightful antagonist here, wants to know what’s going on. They opt not to fill her in. Cas asks the only important question: “What about Dean?” Sam looks at the GPS on his phone pointing to where the Impala is when he gets an email from Charlie. It’s the codex. Rowena can now read the Book of the Damned.

Sam tasks Cas with finding Dean. Sam’s going to keep with their plan. He’s going to save his brother.

He then demands that Rowena read the Book. She’s not so inclined right now. She wants Crowley dead first.

Back at Casa Styne, the burnout is dead and brother Styne has a new arm. Cyrus is devastated.

Dean’s made it to Louisiana and gets pulled over by the cops. They dare to knock out Baby’s rear lights and Dean goes for one of the cops and gets arrested for his effort. I mean, I’m really surprised at the restraint Dean shows here? He doesn’t fight really. He could have busted up both the cops with little effort.

At Phil’s Diner, Crowley enjoys the best cup of coffee he’s ever had (and I’m enjoying the midcentury set design!).

Seth, the server, tells him that he learned how to make a good cup in Ecuador. Next, he’d like to head to Asia. It’s just a dream though. Crowley is in the business of making dreams come true. He gets a call from Dean before he can seal any dream making deals though. Then he gets a text with where to meet Dean --in Kansas, not Louisiana.

Dean’s at the sheriff’s station having his entire rock alias collection uncovered (not to mention the secret arsenal of weapons in the Impala). The officer wants to know who Dean is. “I’m the guy who’s going to get out of here in about 30 seconds.” He then proceeds to knock a mug of pens over. The guy comes over to Dean and Dean promptly gets him in a headlock, demands the handcuff’s keys and knocks the guy out cold. I’d say that took maybe 15 seconds.

Dean finds the sheriff talking to someone on the phone.

He butts him with a gun once for lying and once again for hurting his car. He then demands the sheriff tell him who he was talking to --one of the Stynes, but they own this town and there’s no way Dean can take on this family. Challenge Accepted! (Also: let’s just temporarily think about Dean saying: “Yeah, well I kill gods” as we head into the final season.)

Crowley makes a fabulous entrance into a nasty warehouse, looking for Dean. <Insert 8,000 booty call jokes here> Sam shoots him with a devil’s trap bullet. Sam reveals that he lured Crowley there with a faked phone call from Dean. He flourishes the demon-killing knife and a hex bag, before stuffing the bag into Crowley’s pocket. Oh, and he has a final message from Rowena: “She should’ve taken the three pigs.” Sam x Rowena: murder couple extraordinaire!

Dean casually kills his way into the Styne compound and it’s half James Bond ease and half YIKES OH NO KILLER DEAN BEAN.

Inside, several people point guns at Dean surprise-party-style, while another Styne sneaks a plastic bag onto his face, smothering him. (Query: why are there no women in this family except the single hot nurse? Lame.)

Sam continues to listen to Crowley monologue as he slowly crumples under Rowena’s curse. Crowley insists that he’s been creating a friendlier Hell. “I thought if I did better, I might actually feel something again. That it might matter.” Sam reminds Crowley - and us - that he’s killed a lot of people we care about. Crowley admits to being monstrous and he looks up at Sam. His eyes glow red as he rises, tosses out the bullet, and thanks Sam for jolting him back into his true King-of-Hell give-’em-hell mindset.

Sam started Crowley on his human journey, so I guess it’s fitting that he’s ended it as well.

Dean wakes up on the Styne operating slab. They tell him they’ll kill him and harvest him. (So, like, just do it and quit the smirky speeches?) Dean points out the Mark - he can’t die but he CAN come back as a demon so...don’t say he didn’t warn you. In very little time, Dean dispatches the entire operating theater, killing Elder Styne riiiight in the middle of his evil villain monologue. (For that, we applaud you, Crazed Killer Dean.)

The other Stynes break into the bunker, which is currently unoccupied. They plan to loot and then burn it which, yep, seems pretty much on par with what we’ve seen of these yahoos.

Sam calls Rowena and tells her about the failed hex bag. Rowena’s entirely unimpressed at Sam’s killing prowess and snaps at him to finish the job he started. Mmmhmmm yesss gurl!

Cas calls Sam from the Styne estate. It’s a bloody mess; Dean took out the whole dumb Styne storyline - I mean, family. Now, Dean’s headed back to the bunker.

In the bunker, Cyrus digs through books while Formerly-One-Arm makes dick commentary like, “So this is what I know about Dean Winchester. He's got crappy taste in music, got a hot mom, and he loves flannel.” Man, what I wouldn’t give for a late-season Mary Winchester to show these Stynes what’s what! They finish piling stuff in the middle of the library and pour fuel over everything. A single match gets dramatically lit when the other Styne Stooge stumbles in, stabbed.

Dean Winchester appears, covered in blood and looking so pissed that he’s practically on the other side of the emotion by now.

Formerly-One-Arm Styne disrespects Charlie and, despite Dean’s dead-eyed stare, we’re really ready for Dean to let go and beat this jerk down. Without further preamble, Dean shoots him in the head. Dean then threatens Cyrus, who begs for mercy. He doesn’t have monstrous stitches and he hates his family! (Though it’s strongly implied that Cyrus is complicit in his bully’s death and de-arming.) “There's bad in you,” Dean tells him in response. “It's in your blood. Now you can deny it and you can run from it all you want, but that bad will always win.” Oh, Dean Bean. The Mark’s got you well and truly hooked now. Dean kills Baby Styne.

Cas walks in, horrified by what Dean’s done.

….And then they hug it out and go for milkshakes!

Right?

Ugh, okay. Fine. Cas confronts Dean about his faulty moral compass.

Dean flares up about Sam and Cas’s secret project to cure Dean. Cas insists that Dean needs help. “Maybe you could fight the Mark for years. Maybe centuries, like Cain did. But you cannot fight it forever. And when you finally turn, and you will turn. Sam, and everyone you know, everyone you love...they could be long dead. Everyone except me. I'm the one who will have to watch you murder the world. So if there's even a small chance that we can save you, I won't let you walk out of this room.”

Dean continues to glare at Cas.

……..And then they hug it out and go for milkshakes!

(Boris and I will take just a moment to picture Cas staying by Dean’s side for centuries. Please do not mind the sound of quiet weeping.)

Instead of milkshakes and hugs, there’s a terrible fight where Cas only defends and doesn’t attack. He begs Dean to stop his march into darkness and in response Dean beats him bloody. He pulls out Cas’s angel blade and raises it to strike. As Dean hovers above his bloodied friend, Cas simply says, “Please…”

Dean stabs a nearby book instead, and stalks out of the bunker leaving nothing but terrible feelings in all of us - and a clear threat of future murderous intent.

______________________________

The Mark of Quotes is Changing You!

An angel that rejected Heaven. That's like a fish that wants to fly, or a dog that thinks he's people. I’d be happy to kill her, she just called me a fish.

You got seventeen fake I.D.'s, and a trunk full of guns, knives, freakin' ninja stars... I mean, who are you, man?

Aren’t you a clever kitty?

You can save me the speech on the three hearts, the two spleens, the seven nipples, for the ladies... or the fellas, I don't judge.

______________________________

Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive! 

[seawolvesanddragons]

Alternate Avengers Timeline

So my friend and I were wishing the MCU had given us a more "Avengers as a team" storyline and then my hand slipped and this happened:

--tower shenanigans happened slowly following after NYC, but by Thor's return Tony has been living there full time since Malibu literally blew up and was part time there before hand anyway. As soon as he went full time, Bruce moved in.

--they were being called in on smaller scale missions, usually Steve plus the assassins, but often the science bros for their brains if Tony and Bruce agreed to, and even Iron Man when he agreed to.

--Steve is splitting his time between DC and the tower, so is Natasha since she's paired with Steve for most of his missions.

--Clint is almost full time avenger now: SHIELD needed someone in NYC anyway, and he could double with keeping an eye on Tony and Bruce when Natasha was with Steve. Also, he doesn't have a handler anymore since Phil, doesnt want any other, so this was the compromise. He likes it, the guys are cool, NYC missions are interesting, he still gets to go out with Steve and Natasha often, and he's closer to his sister Laura and her two kids (with one more on the way) - her husband died in battle of new York. Avengers excepting Natasha don't know about his sister and her family. He and Natasha have their special understanding. Its left ambiguous so that fans can interpret what they want.

--Winter soldier and dark world happen still as before, but the post credit scene of dark world is the avengers all arriving in London to help after Thor has already solved everything and are just sort of standing around uselessly after an epic entrance. Tony tells him and Jane to stop by the tower and offers Jane a job.

--age of ultron happens as it did but with better understanding between Tony and Steve and also more discussion about threats from space, Tony/Jarvis running surveillance for Bucky. Sam is basically being phased into Avengers. Rhodey is trying to get transferred cause "no way is the winged youngun beating me to the group" and Peitro lives dammit. Hulk still goes because I liked him in Ragnarok. So off to space, sorry bud.

--I think all the standalone movies can go as planned up till CW...civil war goes by and large the same, with key differences: Tony and Steve argue about the accords yes, but this avengers is far more cohesive then our timeline; they've been living and working together since 2013. The UN is withholding aid and info that could help the group learn more about the threat of whoever was behind Loki and Thor's vision from Age of Ultron (Thor keeps in touch with them; he and Jane still break up). Tony, who prioritizes this threat, is willing to sign the line in order to get the information. ("Its not like we can't just break the rules later Steve" ) but Steve thinks their earth based missions are more imprtant right now because theyre here, in the present, and the accords would tie their hands from doing any real good. They're trying to figure out a compromise, and yes tempers are running a bit short when the attack happens and Bucky is framed. Tony and the others immediately tell Steve to go (Natasha and Sam go with him as back up) while the others try to stall the military and un from arresting Bucky. A new deal is put on the table: sign the accords, and Bucky (and Wanda who is being unfairly demonized by them) get full immumity. Tony thinks this might work. He tries to get in touch with Steve to talk it through, but some black ops break through his and the other Avengers defensivsss and Tchallas attack keeps him from getting in contact. Steve, Sam, Bucky are arrested (Natasha gets away) and taken to SHIELD where they keep them separated from the team, and tell them Tony and the others already signed the accords. Steve doesn't believe them. What's his name is pulling his shit with Bucky, and before he can confer with Tony and the others, Steve and Sam have to break out, stop Bucky, and go on the run again. Before the leave, Steve sees Tony in an office with Ross - just enough to plant a seed of doubt in his mind.

They decide they need to go after whoever framed Bucky. Sam asks if they need to get the whole team in, but Steve knows getting this info on the Space Threat is also important. They can't sever all ties. Let Ross think the group was split and have Tony and Natasha try to work their magic on Ross to get the info. Discreet messages are sent out. We see Clint slipping away from Natasha , Rhodey, and Tony's meeting with Ross. Vision is distracted from watching Wanda (still placed on house arrest, which everyone is protesting. Also pietro has been off doing his own thing, travelling the world and hoping to find Hulk.) Sam tells Steve about Scott and a few strings are pulled by Hill to get him there. The mission: destroy the other super soldiers Bucky talked about. Ross catches wind and declares them vigilantes and orders the rest of the avengers after them. After a lot of arguing and Tony almost blowing Ross to bits (no one has forgotten what he did to Bruce) the final punch is pulled: full Immunity for the rogue Avengers, the info on Space threats, and the location of Bruce's Quinn jet. Just sign The accords. Its the only way out of this nightmare. The last one gets Tony. He wants Bruce back. They need to get to Steve and work this out, and they can't leave until someone signs the accords. So he does. Rhodes and Natasha follow suit. The first thing Ross does is order them to stop the others and bring them in. Tony remimds him of the deal and declares they have 36 hours to get Steve and the others to come in and work this out. After that, the accords can go into full affect. Ross gets even by telling Tchalla where Bucky is, and Tony, Vision and co have to go there to keep him from killing Bucky. Tony brings Peter because a) he needs a wild card, especially one whose webbing can get people to pause and b) he wants the kid associated with the Avengers before Ross goes after him. Peitro also stops by and goes with them to meet the others.

--the airport scene is a mess of communication - Steve needs to GO, before the super soldiers are awakened, but Tony needs him to LISTEN because things are spiraling. Tchalla gets tired of the talk and attacks, causing Wanda to hold him off. Vision incapacitates Wanda. Suddenly all hell breaks loose, and a full on fight breaks out. The avengers are torn into two. Tchalla is the one to nearly stop Bucky and Steve from escaping, until Tony knocks him out from behind. "Think Ross bought that whole pantomime?" "Seemed pretty real to me. You hit hard Tony" "walk it off Cap. You said something about more Russian evil you before?" "Yeah. You'll keep Ross off our back?" "Do my best. Good luck Cap." "I'll need it. And Tony? Thanks."

--Rhodey is injured trying to protect Wanda from Ross's men when they suddenly appear. Sam saves him.

--Tony and "Team Iron Man" are horrified by the underground prison. The plan is to break them out. Natasha tells Tony to go help Cap under the guise of trying to arrest him, because "you can't be here when they escape." Tony goes. Tchalla follows. The reveal happens and at first Tony is angry, is lashing out, and Steve is confused to (because Steve didn't know in this timeline) and torn between who to help, and Bucky just...lets the attack come. Steve tries to intervene but Tony blasts him to the side. Finally, Tony is ready for the killing blow - and he can't. He knows this face, it's been in his database for years now, searching for Steve's long lost best friend. He sees Rhodey in his mind, falling out of the sky. He hears his mother's voice. And he tears the gauntlet off, screaming in pain and heartache.

--tchalla and villain dudes scene stays.

--Tony and Steve finally get to talk everything out and figure out the best course of action. There's no way around it: the team has to split. They needed to be ready to fight the oncoming war as well as put out the current fires. Besides, half of the Avengers have been tossed in prison. So Steve will take his team (minus Scott, who ops for house arrest) and they'll go vigilante. Meanwhile, Tony and his folk stay on as the remaining official Avengers, and get the info they need. Steve gives Tony a burner phone, tells him to call if he ever needs help.

--Natasha has broken the others out of prison. Vision, Rhodey, Peitro are staying with Tony as Avengers. Steve, Sam, Natasha are going rogue, with Tchalla offering them Wakanda as an operating base if,needed. He also takes Bucky to help rehabilitate. Clint is taking Wanda to recover at his sisters farm, which Ross doesn't know about, to give her time to heal. When shes ready, they would join whoever needed them. Scott gives Tony Hank's contact to reach other and work together if needed.

--so basically the media, public, and Ross think the Avengers are fueding but really Tony and Steve are playing war on both sides.

--standalone movies since then stay the same, but Thor is pan, slightly more aware of the earth going ons, and tells Bruce about some of them in Ragnaroc. Stephan strange is ace. Also they expain why the mystic one has the time stone, and also throwaway line about how the Avengers would be better equipped for this till they broke up,

--Tony constantly trolls Ross

--Peter knows that secretly they all get along, but has to pretend like it really is Steve v Tony like every other civilian thinks it is. Ned is overjoyed when he learns otherwise.

--Spider-Man is also just full of subtle nods to the con the avengers are pulling on Ross. The party Tony is at when he rescues Peter shows Natasha and Sam disguised in the background. Peter gets a postcard from Brooklyn he puts on his wall post the ferry incident.

--thor calms Hulk down at some point in Ragnarok by referencing times in the tower when they all lived together.

--Infinity war comes. Hulk arrives with his news, Tony is literally about to call Steve when the attack happens. That's it, thwy're seperated for the rest of the fight once Tony gets on the spaceship.

-when Tony disappears, Rhodey and Hulk ask Peitro to tell them where Vision is with Wanda, because that secret was fooling no one. Also, the rogue Avengers have been secretly half living in the tower again for months now between missions; Peter knows each of them by name. Ross suspects but can't prove anything and he hates it)

--Avengers reunited, sans Tony and Thor!

--Tony's been compiling info on this new threat post civil war, as well as working on new tech to sneak to the rogues when he can; this all comes out as they head from NY to Wakanda. Scott doesn't have a role, as in the original, but Clint is there and he goes. Or maybe Clint somehow ends up in space after they are fighting off the ones attacking Wanda and Vision and is just wondering how he gets in progressively stupider situations with just a bow and arrows. Well, time to hide until he can figure out an escape plan. Somehow this ends with him ending up on the same place as Tony, Strange, Peter, and the Guardians, in the middle of their fight. It's kind of hilarious.

--Tony's dislike of Strange is explained as Tony knowing Strange refused to work on Rhodey's legs because it was too simple and boring a case. Strange has to prove he's changed.

--(btw, Avengers didn't interfere with Strange because the rogues where off on their own mission already and NY Avengers couldn't because of the accords. Had the ancient one not assured them long before they could hold their own, they would have broken the accords once they knew something hanky was going on. In Black Panther, the group just left and didn't really hear about it. You get a few references to their stay though. )

--the rest of Infinity War stays the same.

--Clint's niece stays alive and Natasha gets her; she's there when the spaceship returns and she is ready to fight Thanos

--time skip of six, eight months before they figure out how to reverse the snap. Pepper is pregnant. Harley is there because his family got snapped and Tony just keeps adopting kids ok? Movie generally stays the same but Natasha doesn't die, Tony comes up with literally any other plan and therefore doesn't die, Steve fucking stays

--back to everyone living in the tower together, the accords are ripped up and everyone gets to be an avenger again; Thor decides to travel with the guardians for a while to find a new planet for Asgard as Valkarie runs shit. Theres a shot near the end showing Peter, Clint's neice, Harley (who is working on a prototype iron man suit) and Shuri talking with Cassie hanging on to every word, foreshadowing the young Avengers.

-

[dukereviewsmovies]

Duke Reviews: Thor

Hello, I'm Andrew Leduc And Welcome To Duke Reviews Where We Are Continuing Our Look At The Marvel Cinematic Universe....

As We Look At The First Movie With The God Of Thunder, Thor...

This Film Sees Thor (Played By Chris Hemsworth) Being Banished To Earth By His Father Odin After Reigniting A Dormant War, Stripped Of His Powers, Thor Seeks To Return To Asgard When His Brother, Loki (Played Memorably By Tom Hiddleston) Seeks To Take The Throne Of Asgard For Himself, Will Thor Return To Asgard In Time To Stop His Evil Brother?

Let's Find Out As We Watch Thor...

The Movie Starts At Night On The Planet Earth As Jane Foster (Played By Natalie Portman) Erik Selvig (Played By Stellan Skarsgård) And Jane's Assistant, Darcy (Played By Kat Dennings, Who Is Apparently The Jar Jar Binks Of This Film) Who Are There To Monitor Atmospheric Disturbances Which Tie Into Jane's Work...

Eventually Finding Something, They Drive Off To See Whatever It Is But When They Drive Into It They End Up Crashing Into A Guy With Blonde Hair And A Beard, This Leads To An Introduction By Odin (Played By Hannibal Lecter Himself, Sir Anthony Hopkins)

(Start At 3:02)

Showing His Sons, Thor And Loki The Casket Of Endless Winter, Thor Promises His Father That He'll Hunt Them Down And Slay Them All, However Odin Tells Him That A Wise King Does Not Seek War, But He Must Always Be Ready For It....

Years Later, Thor Is Ready To Ascend To The Throne Of Asgard With His Brother Loki And His Friends, The Warriors Three (Hogun (Played By Tadanobu Asano) Fandral (Played By Once Upon A Time's Josh Dallas) And Volstagg (Played By The Punisher)) And Lady Sif (Played By Jaime Alexander) By His Side...

But When 3 Frost Giants Break Into The Weapons Vault At Asgard, Odin Destroys Them With The Prototype Version Of Cyclops So, Him, Thor And Loki Can Come Down To See What Happened...

Seeing This As A Possible Threat To Their Boarders, Thor Suggests Going To Their Homeworld Of Jotunheim To Teach Them A Lesson So They Won't Dare Cross Their Boarders Again, However With Odin Seeing This As Just An Isolated Incident That Will Never Happen Again As The People Behind It Have Paid With Their Lives, Odin Tells Thor No...

Having A Major Temper Tantrum In The Dining Hall Because Daddy Won't Let Me Have My Way...

Loki Goes To Talk With Thor To Say That Despite What Odin Thinks He Thinks He's Right, Saying That If The Frost Giants Broke In Once, They'll Do It Again...

Which Sounds Right...

Thor Is Right, The Frost Giants Broke The Truce And They Should Be Going To War But Odin Is Like "These Things Do Happen" Bull! Something Needs To Be Done And Just Simply Raising Security Is Not Enough...

Deciding To Go To Jotunheim With Loki, Sif And The Warriors Three, They Race To The Bifrost Where They Try To Convince Heimdall (Played By Idris Elba) To Help Them, Which He Only Does Because He's Pissed Off A Frost Giant Got Passed His Watch And He Wants To Know Why...

Once On Jotunheim, They Meet The Ruler Of This Frosty Realm...

(Start At 0:17, End At 1:46)

No, No, Not Him!

This Guy, Laufey, Who Tells Thor That The House Of Odin Is Full Of Traitors, He Doesn't Know What His Actions Will Unleash And That He Should Leave Now While He Still Allows It, Which They Start To But One Lousy Frost Giant Couldn't Shut His Mouth

(Start At 2:07, End At 4:28)

Being Chased By Frost Monsters, Odin Eventually Appears To Try To Barter Peace With Laufey, But It Is Too Late And Laufey Declares War On Asgard...

Taking Them All Back To Asgard, Odin Argues With Thor About What He Has Done And For His Actions, Odin Takes Away Mijonir From Thor And Banishes Him To Earth And Sends Us Back To Where The Film Began With Jane And Her Team Finding Thor...

Believing Him To Be On Drugs Or Something, Darcy Tazers Him And They Take Him To The Hospital Only For Thor To Attack The Doctors And Nurses When He Comes To...

Meanwhile On The Other Side Of New Mexico, A Driver Comes Across A Big Crater Where Mijonir Landed And Tries To Pull It Out Only To Be Unsuccessful...

Back At Their Lab, Jane And Her Team Go Over The Data Of What Happened Last Night And Discover That Whatever It Was Had The Characteristics Of An Einstien-Rosen Bridge Otherwise Known As A Wormhole...

Coming Across A Picture Of What Looks Like A Man Inside Of The Wormhole, Jane Races To The Hospital To Get Thor...

Strapped Down After Trying To Escape By Beating The Living Hell Out Of Doctors And Nurses, Thor Somehow Manages To Break Free Before Jane And Her Team Get There...

However, When They Go To Leave, They End Up Running Thor Over Again...

Do You Just Run People Over On A Regular Basis, Jane?

Meanwhile At The Crater With Mijonir, Millions Of People Are Around The Area Trying To Get It Out Like It's The Sword In The Stone...

Hell, Even Stan Is Getting Involved...

Stan Lee Cameo!

But While Everyone Tries To Get It Out, A Car Arrives On A Hilltop, With The Driver Getting Out Of The Car, We See That It's Phil Coulson (Played By Clark Gregg) Who's There To Redo The End Credit Scene From Iron Man 2 For The People Who Didn't See The Film Which Is Most Likely The People Who Live Under A Rock Or Martin Scorsese...

Jane Gets Thor Some Clothes Along With An Easter Egg To Dr. Donald Blake, While On Asgard, The Warriors Three And Sif Are Missing Thor. However, They Soon Wonder How The Guards Found Out, This Leads Loki To Admit That He Told Them, However He Had No Idea That Odin Would Banish Thor For What He Did...

Sif Asks Loki To Convince Odin To Change His Mind But Despite Loving Thor More Than Any Of Them, Loki Knows How Arrogant, Reckless And Dangerous Thor Is And He Believes That That Is Not What Asgard Needs Right Now...

As Loki Walks Away, Hogun Remembers What Laufey Said About The House Of Odin Being Full Of Traitors, Stating That A Master Of Magic Could Bring 3 Frost Giants Into Asgard, But Sif, Fandral And Volstagg Just Dismiss The Idea...

Meanwhile In The Weapons Room In Asgard, Loki Grabs The Casket Of Endless Winter Only To Be Confronted By Odin Who Discovers That Touching It Has Briefly Transformed Loki Into A Frost Giant...

(Start At 0:50, End At 2:22)

With Loki Mad At His Father For This, Odin Soon Faints And Falls Into What He Calls The Odinsleep...

Taking Thor For Food, Him Along With Jane And Her Team Hear About A Crater Where A Satellite Crashed In The Desert, But When They Say That No One Could Lift It, Thor Knows That It's His Hammer And Asks The Gentlemen Where It Is And They Tell Thor Where It Is Only To Warn Him That Feds Showed Up...

Walking In The Middle Of The Road With Jane And Her Team Following, Thor Tells Jane That If She Helps Him Reclaim Mijonir, He'll Tell Her Everything She Needs To Know. But Selvig Tells Jane Not To Go Because He Believes Thor To Be A Delusional Nut So Jane Doesn't Go With Him And They Just Walk Off Only To Get Screwed By Coulson And S.H.I.E.L.D. Who Take Everything From Them...

And I Do Mean Everything, Their Data, Their Facts Their Scientific Equipment...Everything Without Even Saying Please...

With Their Research Gone, Erik Lays Down A Reference To Bruce Banner Before We Go Back To Asgard To See That With Thor Gone And The Allfather Deep In The Odinsleep, Loki Has Been Placed In Charge Of Asgard...

(Start At 0:40, End At 1:49)

Jane Decides To Help Thor By Driving Him To The Crater Site Which Has Been Taken Over By Coulson And S.H.I.E.L.D. Sneaking Under The Gate, Thor Fights Dozens Of S.H.I.E.L.D. Soldiers While Coulson Gets Clint Barton (Played By Jeremy Renner) To Try To Take Thor Down From Above, But Eventually Reaching Mijonir Thor Tries To Grab It Only To Discover That He Cannot Lift It As He Is Not Worthy...

Arrested By S.H.I.E.L.D. Guards, Coulson Interrogates Thor Only To Get Nothing Out Of Him. Once Coulson Leaves, Loki Appears To Thor...

(Start At 1:10, End At 3:09)

Getting Selvig To Help Her After A Talk About How Magic Is Just Science That They Don't Understand, Selvig Goes Down To The S.H.I.E.L.D. Site To Free Thor, By Stating That He Was Upset That They Took Their Research And The Reason He Was Able To Take Down Their Soliders Is Because He's A Health Nut On Steroids...

Buying Selvig's Story, Coulson Lets Thor Go, But Before He Leaves, Thor Manages To Get Ahold Of A Book That Belongs To Jane...

Taking Thor To A Bar To Talk, They Get A Few Drinks Which Ends In Selvig Getting Drunk To The Point That Thor Has To Carry Him Back To Jane's Trailer...

Meanwhile On Jotunheim, Laufey Has A Visitor In The Form Of Loki, Who Tells Him That He Was The One Who Let The Frost Giants Into Asgard Mainly Because He Wanted To Ruin Thor's Big Day. Offering To Conceal Laufey And A Few Of His Soldiers In Asgard So He Can Kill Odin And Take Back The Casket Of Endless Winter, Laufey Accepts...

Travelling Back To Asgard, Heimdall Tells Loki That He Couldn't See Him On Jotunheim Which Has Him Suspecting That Loki Was The One Who Brought The Frost Giants Into Asgard...

But Telling Heimdall To Never Question Him As He Is King And To Not Open The Bifrost To Anyone Until He Has Repaired The "Damage" That Thor Has Caused, Loki Exits...

Talking Outside With Thor, He Gives Jane Her Book Before Telling Her Everything She Wants To Know And Where He Comes From...

Back On Asgard, Fandral And Volstagg Are At The Point Of Fighting Before Sif And Hogun Unite Them When They Realize What They Must Do And That's Go To Earth To Get Thor Back. Going To Heimdall At The Rainbow Bridge After Hearing Them With His Powers, He Somewhat Helps Them...

And Somewhat Helps Them, I Mean He Walks Out, Leaves His Sword That Opens The Bifrost And Lets The Warriors Three And Lady Sif Use It To Go To Earth..

Seeing The Bifrost Being Opened, Loki Sends The Destroyer To Detroy Thor And His Companions...

Arriving On Earth, The Warriors Three And Sif Go Into Town To Try To Find Thor Only To Be Spotted By S.H.I.E.L.D. Agents On The Rooftops...

No, No, No, You Twit! This Is Robin Hood..

He Was Prince Charming...

Eventually Finding Thor, He Tells Them What Loki Told Him Only For Sif To Tell Thor That Odin's Alive And He's Been Lied To...

Confronting Heimdall Who Knows The Truth Now, He Fights Loki After Loki Dismisses Him From His Job Of Gatekeeper Only For Loki To Freeze Him With The Casket Of Endless Winter

Arriving At The Site Where The Warriors Three And Sif Landed, Coulson And His Agents Watch As The Destroyer Arrives On Earth...

(Start At 0:38)

Talking With The Destroyer, Knowing That Loki Is Watching, Thor Tells His Brother That Whatever He Has Done To Lead Him To This, He Truly Is Sorry But Taking Their Lives Will Not Gain Him Anything So Instead He Offers Up His, And The Destroyer Kills Him Only For Thor To Be Brought Back To Life By Mijonir As He's Proven Himself Worthy Enough To Regain His Powers To Destroy The Destroyer...

Confronted By Coulson Who Says It's Obvious That He Hasn't Been Telling Him The Truth. Thor Tells Coulson That They Fight For The Same Cause And To Consider Him An Ally If They Return The Items They Stole From Jane, Which Coulson Promises To Return...

Taking Jane, To The Bifrost Site With The Warriors Three And Sif Going There In Selvig's Car, Heimdall Breaks Free Of Loki's Ice Prison And Opens The Bifrost To Bring Thor And The Others Home....

But Before He Leaves, Thor Promises To Return For Jane Which Ends Up With Them Kissing...

But While Thor And The Others Were On Their Way To The Bifrost And Heimdall Was Still Frozen, Loki Brought Laufey And His Frost Giants Into Asgard To Kill Odin But When Laufey Goes To Kill Odin, Loki Double Crosses Him And Kills Him Instead...

Making The Attack Look As If It Was Orchestrated By The Frost Giants, Thor Arrives To Reveal All Of Loki's Lies...

Blasting Thor Out Of Odin's Room, Thor Flies To The Bifrost As Loki Heads There To Release The Full Power Of The Bifrost On Jotunheim To Destroy The Entire Planet...

(Start At 0:28)

Realizing That He Can't Stop This, Thor Decides Instead To Destroy The Bifrost With Mijonir, Knowing That He Will Never See Jane Again..

But When The Bifrost Is Destroyed Loki And Thor Are About To Go Over The Edge But Luckily, Odin Wakes From His Odinsleep To Save His 2 Sons, However After Telling His Father That He Did This For Him, Loki Lets Go Of His Staff Only To Supposedly Fall To His Death...

Holding A Celebration/Funeral Over The Return Of Thor And The Loss Of Loki, Thor Talks With His Father, He Tells Thor That He Will Be A Wise King But Thor Admits That He Has A Lot To Learn And Says That Someday He Will Make His Father Proud, However Odin Says That He Is Already Proud Of Him Before He Walks Away...

Headed To The Rainbow Bridge (Can't Really Say The Bifrost As The Bifrost Is Gone) Thor Talks With Heimdall Asking If He Can See Jane, Saying That He Can He Tells Thor That She Is Searching For Him...

After The Credits Roll, We Get The End Credits Scene Of The Film Which Shows Selvig Meeting With Nick Fury (Played Again By Samuel L. Jackson) Who Is Impressed By His Work With Jane Foster And Shows Him The Tesseract In Which He Needs His Help Adapting It In Someway...

Looking In A Mirror, We See That Loki Is Alive As He Puts Words In Selvig's Mouth...

This Film Is...Pretty Good...

Alot Of People Complain That This Is Just A Fish Out Of Water Story With Only Best Scenes Being In Asgard But Me, I Just Like This Movie, The Stuff With Thor And Loki And Thor And Jane Is Interesting And I Love The Fight Scenes, I Love The Warriors Three And Sif As Well As The Stuff With Darcy (I Know I'm Going To Get Alot Of Hate For This But I'm Sorry I Like The Character, I Thought Anthony Hopkins Was Good, I Thought Asgard Was Amazing As Well As The New Mexico Setting, It Was Just A Good Film And I Say See It...

Till Next Time, This Is Duke, Signing Off...

[icequeenjules26]

The Sun, The Moon, The Stars

Summary: Lonely armourer Dan meets a strange human on his space travels and learns what cannot be long hidden...

Word count: 2,6K

Tags: Science fiction au, fantasy au, were-creature!Dan, human!Phil, Strangers to lovers

A/n: My second fic for the @phandomreversebang! I struggled a bit with this one but I think it turned out okay. Beta'd by the amazing @artlessdynamite who was a lifesaver as usual, the impossibly gorgeous art is by the incredible @maybeformepersonally (seriously, so gorgeous, I’m still speechless.). A big thanks to both!!!

Read on AO3

Overall, Dan’s life was a good one. Not perfect, maybe; but what in life could ever be described as perfect? Especially for people like Dan - he knew he wasn’t the best kind of person. He’d made some pretty questionable, sometimes downright evil decisions and hardly regretted any of them. Or at least he didn’t regret making them. He did regret having to make them, but that really didn’t make him a better person, and contrary to popular believe, he was very much aware of that. 

  He stumbled as his ship swayed in the air, avoiding another asteroid, and he took a look out of the windshield. He was rapidly approaching Beaconia, a fairly green planet. Its colour stood out in the surrounding nothingness of space, blackness only speckled with the brown-ish colours of the asteroids. It took some maneuvering to get to Beaconia, which was probably the reason it didn’t get a lot of visitors - at least not of the living kind. Dan was glad his shuttle had the best AAAS (Automatic Asteroid Avoiding System) there was. His job would be a lot harder otherwise, as it included traveling to far off, hardly reachable planets.

  Honestly, Dan only wanted to go to Beaconia for one single reason. 

  Theolit. 

  It was an incredibly rare gem that was a guaranteed sell, especially in Dan’s business, the armoury.

  Dan had been forging weapons for as long as he could remember. Especially in a world with so many alien creatures running around. Weapons were always on demand, and since different species had different weaknesses (Alvarias for example could not be hurt with steel, the metal most swords and arrowheads were made of. For Dalios on the other hand, it was the only metal that would) the armoury was a demandable job. 

  That was also one of the biggest reasons Theolit was so highly demanded: It was the only material that was able to hurt every species in the known universe. It cut easily through the gooey flesh of Balbas and managed to cut through the complicated skin of Lalarients, which was incredibly soft but impenetrable by nearly everything. 

  The thinnest layer of Theolit on the forged weapon or even just the tiniest stone attached to the hilt enchanted any weapon to cut through anything, even though the actual gem was the softest one Dan knew of. Still, it worked, it always worked - 

  even on him. 

  Dan’s inner animal roared dangerously at the thought and he could feel his eyes flash violet as opposed to their normal chocolate brown colour. His claws extended and his fangs bore uncomfortably into his lower lip. 

  The sun, the moon, the stars, he murmured to himself, like a mantra; the sun, the moon, the stars. 

  Three things cannot be long hidden…

  It was just a little saying, but it was powerful, at least to Dan - it was his anchor. The only thing keeping him sane when his coywolf became threateningly powerful and was close to breaking free. 

  It winced and drew back as Dan murmured the words and drew the sign, a swirl parting to three sides, into the air, and Dan allowed himself to relax. Too close. 

  It was then that a cheerful ding notified Dan that his ship had successfully landed. 

The planet was green and warm, but because of the thick canopy of high-up leaves, it was fairly dark most of the time. Dan had to get through the deepest, darkest part of the jungle to get to the well hidden water source of the planet - one of the few places in the known universe Theolit formed naturally. With all the science and testing, it still wasn’t clear what the gem was made of, but thankfully a few places appeared to naturally produce the gem. 

When Dan stepped through the tiny opening the main trees left in between them to get to the waterfall behind it, there was a sound behind him, like the faint rustling of leaves, just a shift in the air - then a scent made its way into his nose and his coywolf was instantly on high alert, fangs extended, eyes violet. He turned around in a flash and snarled viciously as his shifted eyes scanned the area. 

What stepped out between the stray branches of suntrees was a creature holding a loaded crossbow pointed right at Dan’s chest. At first, he couldn’t be sure what it was exactly - mainly because he never would’ve guessed he’d come across a member of that specific species deep in the Beaconian jungle. 

Its heat signature matched the one of a normal human, the scent fit as well and once he’d differentiated its form from the weapon in its hand, he realized that fit as well. 

“You’re human,” he snarled in something between surprise and anger. His coywolf added some kind of growl at the end of the sentence and for once, he agreed with it. 

“And you’re a-” the human started as it inched forward, but then its foot got caught on a stray root, it yelped adorably and - 

it toppled over. 

Dan was howling with laughter before he could even comprehend what was going on. 

Overall, the way they met represented them to a T. It was nothing but coincidence, but Phil’s stunt made Dan halt, giving him time to reign in his coywolf, and ultimately, that was what kept him from ripping Phil into shreds. It was the best example for how they worked - what made them them. Phil’s clumsy, awkward manner gave Dan’s life the spice that it had lacked before, while keeping him in check at the same time. On the other hand, Dan seemed to give Phil’s life the meaning that had been missing. Before he’d come along, Phil had been nothing but a small farmer living on the outskirts of the galaxy on a sister planet of Beaconia. He’d seen Dan’s foreign ship landed on Beaconia and had hopped over to check what was going on.

Due to some miracle that Dan didn’t know about and Phil refused to explain, Phil didn’t hate Dan, neither for almost killing him nor for being what he was. Naturally, humans and were-creatures tended to not get along - mostly because their natures were completely divided and both sides refused to show some empathy with the other - so they made quite the unlikely pair. 

Dan really didn’t know why Phil chose to go with him. He had a life there, a lonely one, maybe, but one he’d chosen years ago, so Dan really couldn’t get behind what Phil was after, and he refused to tell Dan, even though the were-coywolf felt like there was more to it. 

So he sat by quietly as Phil unobtrusively, almost unknowingly infused himself into Dan’s life. Sure, it had been a big thing when after their joint hike to the Theolit source in the heart of Beaconia and back Phil had announced he wanted to accompany Dan on his journey back to his homebase, two galaxies over. But afterwards, it just slotted together almost unbeknownst to both of them. Dan had a spare bedroom in his ship that Phil moved into, and on their long journey back to Dan’s homeplanet - a few months if everything went according to plan - it all fell into place quite naturally. 

Phil’s life as a farmer meant he was used to getting up early to water the plants before the sun was up and would burn them, so in the mornings, he’d be the one to start breakfast and coffee to lure Dan out of bed. Dan, on the other hand, was usually in charge of dinner and lunch since he was the better cook. Throughout the day, Dan would do some work for his armoury. He had the equipment for usual forging on his ship, although handling Theolit was a lot more delicate and complicated, so he needed his homebase for that. He’d take Phil with him, show him what he knew; and over time, instead of being just an accomplice and friend, he also became Dan’s apprentice. 

There also was a lot more to their relationship than being friends, but both of them mostly ignored that part. 

They spent their nights watching movies and TV shows. They found that they liked a lot of the same stuff, they laughed with each other, joked about each other and generally just had a good time that none of them would’ve expected. Surprisingly, after the initial difficulties that they’d had, Phil and Dan’s coywolf got along great as well - it would purr in pleasure whenever Phil touched Dan in any kind of form. It helped Dan get in touch with it more, and helped him out a lot along the way. He was now usually able to calm it down without using his anchor. Phil, however, had learnt quite fast, so whenever his eyes flashed or claws came out and Phil noticed, he’d take Dan’s hand and ask the question in a clear and soothing voice. 

Which three things cannot be long hidden?

Even though he rarely had to use it anymore, his anchor meant a lot to Dan, and Phil seemed to accept that easily. He left little notes with its symbol at places he knew Dan’s coywolf would act up, like in the control room of the ship or near the container he kept the Theolit in. 

It was mere coincidence that led him to learn about Phil’s artistic talent. They had arrived in Dan’s galaxy a few hours ago and were now heading for Dan’s homebase, which they would probably reach within the next hour, so Dan headed out to tell Phil. When he got to Phil’s room his door was closed and with his advanced hearing, he was able to hear the soft music playing in the room. 

 Baby it’s magic, the way you came around…

 Dan found himself humming along to it when he knocked on Phil’s door. 

 “Phil? We’re almost at Grenaria -” 

 Up to this point, Dan still didn’t know why he’d done it. In the months they’d traveled together, Dan had always been incredibly careful with boundaries, so it was an utter shock to him when he just - pushed the door open. Without waiting for Phil’s okay. 

 But what stunned him into silence was not his own misbehaviour. It was what he found in Phil’s room. 

 The walls were plastered in multiple different drawings, each one even more stunning than the last. There was a dragon, big and majestic, sketched out in charcoal. There was a group of kittens, playing with a cotton reel. A group of Alvarians laughing. A majestic horse at the edge of a cliff. And then, on a big sheet of paper in the center of the room -  there was Dan.

 It was a magnificent drawing with a kind of superhero vibe to it - it easily could’ve been a movie poster to one of the movies both Dan and Phil loved so much. Dan himself was at the lower center of the piece. He was standing in a beam of light, looking skywards, his eyes beaming violet. He was holding a sword in his hand, raising it skywards, and there was a lightning bolt connecting with its tip. The sword was an extravagant one, in a very beautiful way - there were lines and patterns carved into the blade, the most prominent one being the triskelion, Dan’s anchor. There was a gem embedded into the very end of its hilt, glowing violet like Dan’s eyes. There was an animal standing at his feet, eyes glowing the same colour, and looking closer, he realized that it was Dan’s coywolf. In the upper center of the drawing, in the vibrant beam of light, the dark outline of the triskelion stood out drastically against the light.

 Dan croaked out a sound that he couldn’t identify - maybe it was a sob, maybe a laugh, he couldn’t be sure - and Phil, standing slightly on the side of the art piece, obviously in the process of putting some finishing touches on it, turned around as if in slow motion. 

 His eyes were as wide as they would go and there was an almost scared look in them when they met Dan’s. “Dan?”

 Dan gulped. “I’m -” He broke off, not sure what to say, how to convey what he felt. His coywolf bristled, unsure of how to react to Dan’s sudden boost of anxiety even though it couldn’t find imminent threat, and it made it even harder for Dan to concentrate on how to form actual English words. “Phil, I’m so sorry -”

 This time it was Phil interrupting him. “Oh, no, nonono! There’s no need to be sorry! I should have heard when you knocked and when you called before and -” He blinked, frantically, searching for something in Dan’s eyes that he was obviously surprised not to find. “Wait, are you not… Are you not mad?”

 Once more, Dan was stunned into silence, looking at Phil like he’d just announced the sky was pink. “Mad?” he asked, completely dumbfounded, and the anxiety in Phil’s stunning blue eyes seem to lessen considerably. “Why the fuck would I be mad?”

 “Disappointed, maybe?” Phil prodded further, completely ignoring Dan’s question.

 “Again, why the fuck -” 

 Phil interrupted him once again with his rambling. “I mean, I get it, I’m just a human and this is literal basics, and I even included you, like what is wrong with me-”

 “Phil. Calm down.”

 Surprisingly, Phil did calm down as Dan stepped a bit closer to gently place his hand on Phil’s arm. “Please don’t downplay yourself. Those are stunning drawings. It’s not basic, and it has literally nothing to do with you being human.”

 “But humans aren’t really supposed to draw -”

 “And were-creatures really aren’t supposed to forge weapons. Especially ones that could be used to kill their own species. Do I look like I care?” This time, it was him interrupting Phil, and the human took a deep breath before he raised his eyes, previously busy observing his shoes, to look into Dan’s.

 “Soo…” Phil said, dragging out the ‘o’ sound, “you’re okay with this?” He gesticulated around the room and then pointed to the drawing of Dan in the center of the room in particular. Dan chuckled. “No. It’s way too gorgeous. Why have I never seen this before?”

 A relieved smile graced Phil’s features now, bright and wide, and Dan had to restrain himself from swooning as Phil thanked him. He felt like he was flying. 

 “So that’s why you wanted to come with me? The art academy at Grenadia?” Dan asked as he stepped even closer to Phil, who didn’t even seem to notice. His eyes were shining with excitement as he started telling Dan about the art program at the Grenadia Academy of Arts. “They explicitly accept humans now, and I was never brave enough, but then I met you, and you were so strong and completely different from everything I was ever taught about were-creatures so I thought -”

 He stopped abruptly. Dan was now standing so close to Phil he could feel the human’s breath on his lips, and he was so enraptured by the human, he didn’t even notice. “You thought?” he whispered, caught in the vibrant blue of Phil’s eyes. 

 “I thought I could do anything, as long as you were by my side.”

 When their lips met in a flurry of colour and sounds that Dan had never seen or heard and was pretty sure hadn’t existed before, his coywolf purred in sheer contentment, and his heart burst with happiness. 

 Afterwards, when they were just standing there, foreheads resting against each other, he raised his hand to gently caress Phil’s face. “You knew it, right? That you couldn’t keep it from me forever?”

 There were tears shining in Phil’s eyes as he nodded with little to no movement, his voice quiet and soft. 

 “Three things cannot be long hidden.”

 The sun, the moon, the truth.

[smolbeandrabbles]

End of the World - Phil Beckman x Reader Drabble (Knowing)

GIF CREDIT: X @memendelsohn

Author’s Note: Appropriately named cute song? Check!  Idea I wrote in 20 minutes but has been in my head since before I watched the movie?! - Check! SPOILERS FOR THE END OF KNOWING! End of the World - Kelsea Ballerini Disclaimer: Characters not mine! AU. Obviously. Seen as he’s married. Screw that though! Premise: It’s the end of the world now... Baby... Words: 897               Super short. But so worth my time.

Warnings: None! ...Okay, maybe it’s sad/angsty but SO sweet.

The sky kept fallin', but we danced in it I was done with love, but second chance in it You cleared the smoke and picked up the wreckage Gotta go through hell to get to heaven

I thought it was the end of the world, but It kept spinning round round round And then the sun came up again And I stopped lookin' down down down I thought the stars in the sky and in my eyes Had lost their shine But just like a lifeline right on time I met you at the end of the world, the world, the world I thought the cold would last forever I didn't know that there was something better Waitin' at the end of the world...

--- John finished his explanation to a room of stunned silence.

Phil sat back in his chair unable to look away from the screen, every urge to deny what was happening etched onto his face but, science didn't lie... "Be with the people you love tonight..." John said it quietly. You couldn't believe what you were hearing for different reasons. You'd finally found something SO good. You'd had a crush on Phil ever since you'd started working here. He had boundless enthusiasm for space, just like you did. And you could sit and talk about your projects for hours. He made you feel welcome right away, and always took time to walk past your office and see how you were doing. But, you weren't even really dating yet... And now.... Everything was going to be taken away from you? John took his leave, leaving you both still sitting there in silence. Was there anything you could even say…? What about all the things you couldn’t say? What about all the things you wish you could say… That it was far too early to say!? Phil swiveled his chair to you, and opened his mouth. But nothing, there was nothing in this world that he could say that would make anything about the situation better. His eyes dropped from yours, sorrowful and he turned back to the computer. You decided not talking was wasting time you no longer had; "Is there anywhere we can even go?" He shook his head at the simulation "Trying would be too desperate. We're talking at least 1 miles’ worth of penetration... I don't think there's anywhere on Earth, conceivably, we can get to AND survive in. This is our extinction event..." He pressed his hands together in front of his lips and shook his head again as you approached him. "So... We have 24 hours?" He turned to you as he stood slowly; "We’ll be lucky if we have that... " Phil sighed, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear. It was weird, when you thought about how long you now had left, that something that small was now the most significant thing he could possibly do - "So the question is... What would you like to do with the time we have left? Where would you go? Who would you want to be with..." He twisted back to his computer, trying to figure out where he could drive to in those amount of hours. If he could see his family one last time. If he could Introduce them to you... The prospect of a shot-gun wedding even sounded tempting. You took a deep breath, taking his hand in yours "I want to be right here. With you." He looked to you again, eyebrow raised "You want to spend your last few hours working!!” "It's not just work! It's our life's work! We will be recording something no-one else ever has or ever will! Surely, someone out there needs to witness, to record exactly what's going to happen." "... You're crazy." You shook your head "I want to be with you. In the place I met you."  ** The sunshine was too bright, too hot. And you were in this room together alone, away from the chaos outside. The screen distorted, once, twice, then fizzed out and back to life. You both knew, time was near. You stared at the numbers again. Horrific though it might have been this was the most fascinating thing. But you were scared. Would you feel anything? Would you feel nothing? What happened afterwards??  You must have looked scared because Phil took your face in his hands and turned you towards him. "No more. Ignore it. Our work is done. It's over. It's complete..." "But Phil I..." "I’ll be damned if the last thing I ever do is look at numbers on a screen, and not your face." Your eyes widened in the shock of his honesty. You bit your lip, and then closed the gap. The kiss was beautifully bittersweet, and he wrapped his arms around you and held you as close as he possibly could. Everything was almost blindingly bright white when it was over. He pushed his forehead to yours; "I love you." It was the first and last time he was ever going to get to say it to you; "I should have told you sooner." "I love you too." you wound your arms around him "... We didn't know it would end this way..." He placed a hand to the back of your head as everything started to get hazy pushing your face protectively into his chest. Taking your other hand in his he entwined his fingers with yours and placed your hands between you, so you could feel each other’s heartbeat. "Close your eyes..." Phil’s voice was on the edge of breaking. But you did as he asked. He buried his face in your shoulder and you knew instantly, the warmth you were feeling was from him. Somehow as your body and your brain accepted this was your fate it tuned everything out that wasn't Phil, his heart, the way he felt holding you. He closed his eyes too, and all at once he knew this couldn't be the end, his voice now a whisper; "I will find you, Y/N... Whatever happens after this. I promise... I will find you."