#i wanna talk about so many things from this episode damnit.

[msbhagirathi]

IPKKND LIVE BLOG - Season 1 [Epi - 2]

Cooooommmmmmmeeee ooooooonnnnnnnn, letz start the second epiiiiiiiiii.

So we are starting right from where we had left them off. ANDDDDD BAAAAMMMM! Khushi jolts out of her (or rather their?) trance and realizes where her hand is, snatches it back. Pulling out Arnav from his trance as well.

I want you to focus on their expressions in the scene. Look closely, when she snatches her hand away from his collar. His gaze, instantly falls down to her hand and there's a moment where he steels himself and maybe even thinks that 'How dare she!'.

It's as if Arnav realizes that he needs to be angry and THEN all hell breaks lose, as he throws her out of his hands. He orders the head of his PR team to control the photos and videos of this 'scandal'. Khushi is locked in a room for interrogation.

Back in Gomti Sadan, the neighborhood aunties are gossiping about Khushi's absence. Buaji asks about the papers' whereabouts to Payal. But, Payal, already very nervous and tongue-tied, reduces to tears. I am surprised why did Buaji not see the change in her demeanor and most importantly her spilled tears. But, that's also not much surprising coz Buaji can hardly ever read Payal or Khushi's distress over anything that they seem to be facing alone, in the entire show. This scene also indicates that Payal has never been the rule-breaker kid, she's always been kind of a 'yes-man' to her parents.

Ohh! Did you notice how Khushi's voice sounds so off? Do you know why? Turns out Sanaya was sick with cold while shooting this sequence. She mentioned this in that interview with Mrs. Gul Khan, which was released right after IPK ended a few months ago.

Arnav instructs the team to interrogate Khushi and check whether a rival company (Re-Fashion? RI-Fashion? REE-Fashion? whatever, lol.) send her there to ruin his fashion show in exchange of some petty amount of money.

Payal's belief, of her Abhishek ji standing up to his family's demand of the dowry, breaks. She realizes that he is present there, knows everything going on but still refuses to speak up. She is heart-broken.

Was it only me or you also thought that the way Sanaya pronounced 'profession' is kind of-idk-intriguing?-sexy?-hot?-pata nahi choro (ok, leave it.)

Garima tries to associate the papers' absence to Khushi's absence. Payal has been caught like a deer caught in headlights.

Arnav comes to meet or rather to interrogate his wife 'that' girl, for 'answers'. Khushi requests him to let her go as she explains him that she landed there by mistake.

He is so adamant in throwing all the unfortunately familiar 'accusatory' questions. What was that 'Wipro-Fashion'? 'PRO-Fashion'? Whatever. See, many of you would disagree, here, but I think he is legit right in doubting her intentions, given the type of people he would have dealt with till now in this profession. Although, WE know, from Khushi's POV, that she is right, BUT that's the thing, he doesn't.

"Then let it (the marriage) break. Problems like these are nothing for girls like you. If one leaves, then trap another." ("Toh tut jaane do shaadi. Tum jaisi ladkiyon ka kya hai. Ek jayega, dusra phasaa lena.") And the BG score changes to something close to tandav beats. Maybe, just maybe he realized that he has struck a chord or crossed a line or fcked up real bad. It can be any of the three.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh! The dreaded moment is here. Khushi retaliates but she does not realize the volcano in front of her, ready to burst out with hot, molten lava. She attempts to side step him but he grabs her by the arm and yanks at the dori of her blouse. Pearls scatter around, everywhere on the floor. Khushi is horror struck, devastated, horrified and all the girls watching this for the first time already knew what that meant. And hated Arnav for doing that to her for a long, long time.

See the irony, here. In the previous episode, we saw them together in that beautiful frame. No-one had any doubt of them being the alpha couple of the show. BUT. BUT. BUT.

After this scene, audience must have doubted, some might even have gone to the extent to declare Arnav as the villain. And later considered Shyam as the hero, coz of the way, he was introduced (we will come to that in that episode).

Hmm. I am thinking. Why did he let her go? Like? So....easily? After she pulled the ribbon from her hair and covered her exposed back, or rather her modesty. Arnav has frozen. At his spot. He isn't even moving a finger. (I will have to process this scene and then will let you know in a separate post.)

With this, the scene blurs and along with Khushi, we reach Gomti Sadan, where everything is eerily silent. Wait. Did we reach so early? Didn't Khushi take the whole day to reach SM? Then how come- ohh Guilty Arnav might have arranged a car for her to reach her home safely-Lol. Who am I kidding with? This is ASR, we are talking about. Let's stop with the wishful thinking.

Gomti Sadan. Gossips. Malign in their social image. A broken marriage. All of these are termed as a "Kali' (black ink) by Buaji. And who's at fault? Khushi. She talks of pulling off her braid and handing it to her. Basically, beat her ass off.

Buaji, I think, was never able to accept Khushi as her own child. She was always the only one to differentiate between the two. She was only the one who instigated Garima and Shashi against her. Although, Shashi had wholeheartedly accepted her as his daughter but Garima, often used to get manipulated into believing the worst, in Khushi.

Even now both Buaji and Garima are convinced that Khushi was, somehow, jealous of her sister's fate (that she was getting married) and so to malign it, she decided to sabotage the wedding by taking away the papers and fleeing out of everyone's sight until the wedding is called off.

Lol. Junior Engineer. And Buaji thinks, that's self-explanatory for them, having a right to ask for a dowry. Khushi explains herself. But, she is admonished by her (B-ji), for acting like a 'Dadi Amma', means trying to act above her age, by interfering in elders' matters.

Still, for the Guptas', specifically for Mrs. Garima Gupta, a broken marriage is worse than Payal getting married into a money-hungry family. Do you see it here? Getting MARRIED is of more importance than getting married into THE RIGHT FAMILY.

And as if all this admonishing and insulting is not enough, so, she kind of disowns her daughter. "Mat kaho hume Amma".

Khushi, who already had abandonment issues, guilt of being a burden to 'this' family, is now shell shocked. Someone please save this poor kid.

Buaji does it again! Hip, hip hurray guys! She again pulls up the orphan card and a non-refundable debt (of getting adopted by her brother and sister in law) card! What an awesome timing Buaji! Shut up Buaji. What? Shashi said this. Not me. I have manners, ok.

"Arre tujhse saga humara koi nahi hai." Payal's words calms Khushi to some extent. But, they are still not enough as we see that Khushi cannot sleep, and keeps tossing and turning, recalling her amma's harsh words.

She wakes up and opens their shop's door. Khushi is shown handling an LPG gas cylinder, an oil cannister and lighting a match stick, giving us the impression of her attempting to give up her life.

Precap starts. *quickly pauses it* I don't watch precaps. Spoilers. Don't like them. Bye. Such a stressful episode to watch.

P.S. : Remember the interview I was talking about? This is it. Please do give it a watch if you haven't already. It's so beautiful them sharing the off-screen things and being all nostalgic. You'll love it. :)

Previous Next Episode!

[alastair-1205]

Episode 16 reactions

Oooooh cool car

I can totally see how Wyldfyre and Robie’s personalities actually match tho. Like they’re both prideful in what they do and have that same little “Not that I needed help but thanks anyway” thing going on. It’s sweet. 

I love it when these two talk it’s so interesting omg

This poor kid is trying so hard to do the right thing and get his parents back 

HE DOESNT TRUST HIM. HES TRYING MAN 

HES SO MANIPULATIVE GOD HIS DIALOG IS SO WELL WRITTEN 

I can see why Jay so easily believed him lol

Y’all have the elemental master of EARTH WITH YOU-

They won. But at what cost 

YES HE WOULD ARIN

DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES THIS SHIT HAS BEEN WUS FUALT

Oh god Lloyd’s own communication issues coming to bite him in the ass 

Euphrasia!!

Noooooooooo she was doing so well :(

They’re gonna have to team with Zeatrix aren’t they

Oh that’s just not even fair to Tox wtffff

OH DAMN 

She’s putting it togetherrrrr

Frackkkkk man. He’s probably not even a bad dude, Ras is just using him too to get to Arin

This is like when ur friend is friends with someone who was an asshole to you. I feel bad on Arin’s behalf lmao

UMMMMMMMMM

WTF WAS THE RED SHIT? ARIN??? WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?

OH NOT THE WARPED VERSION OF THE MAIN LEITMOTIF HOLY SHIT 

Im gonna scream omfg

MR PALE GETTING TO BE BADASS LETS GO

I love that they’re bantering lmao. They know each other!!!

THATS WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE YO. It suits him lol

THEYRE FREINDS AWW

Plz be Cole v Geo

Damnit

Frack is really sweet tho which is cool

Arin on the other hand is not doing so hot rn-

Cmon Cole you used to climb mountains for fun 

At least she owned up to it

Damn he was so close. But yea these contests seem biased

At least someone’s having a good time lol

It’ll be cool to see the dual power fights. Also did Geo win or loose or?

Wtf is a dragon icon 

Oooooooh huh. I wonder how he made the first one then if he needs elemental power to do it. Is that why there’s so many new masters? Did Ras kill the others for the last icon he made?

Oh that’s gonna be a brutal fight 

Cole was not prepared to deal with S1 Kai all over again lmao. I need them to be buddies now

I wanna write a pic about how it feels to have completely different elemental powers and how it feels to go without them for so long (even if the ninja are more used to it than most probably) 

COLE AND WYLDFYRE LMAO the duo I didn’t know we needed 

Oh these games are riggedddddd

Nokt doesn’t even have elemental powers why is he here?

Arin do be sulking

Oh Sora’s gonna get her ass kicked isn’t she

Omg I just realized. Sora not knowing spinjitzu is probably gonna be another reason Arin believes that Ras’ way is better 

Do none of the others see Arin just talking to Ras lol??

See and this game seems rigged in Sora’s favor. I think my earlier theory about Robie was right 

LMAO FRIED CINDER

Sora didn’t show of Wyld’s powers cuz she knew she’d get bit about it 

Oh yo it’s ghost Wu talking to Cole again

ALSO WHERE TF DID CLE GO AFTER SEASON 1 I JUST FUCKING REMEMBERED THAT WE HAVE NO IDEA

Oh Arin :(

WHERE ARE THESE THINGS COMING FROM

[winns-stuff]

LO RANT:

Genuinely believe the fans don’t know what Lore Olympus is even supposed to be anymore. It’s sad going into their comment sections and seeing so many fans be poisoned with utter hypocrisy and be so blinded that they don’t even read what they’re saying. This is why having just one positive opinion isn’t always the best way to go, it’s okay to say that Lore Olympus is not doing the best this is not going to kill Rachel. It’s fine if you’re getting tired of the plot stories, it’s more than fine if you can’t read anymore because of the bad character designs etc. Every time I see a fan it’s like they’re under some mind control and it truly does make me wanna shake my head especially when arguing with a critic, their points will always never make any sense or they’ll just be horrible takes.

For one I’ve noticed a lot of fans love to use the whole “this is how the myth goes!!!!” statement whenever someone has a problem with either the story or the characters in that episode that day. You guys please stop saying that shit, it’s getting old and it doesn’t even make sense. You can’t say that Lore Olympus is exactly like the myths and in the same breath defend Rachel’s abstract artistic choices by saying “she can do whatever she wants!! it’s a retelling!!” which one is it damnit? Is she following the myths or putting a massive spin on it? Pick one you can’t have both at the same damn time.

That’s the backwards thinking of this entire fandom that really trips me out though, the fans want two very opposite and different things to exist all at once but in reality it never will. Your webtoon is plagued with so much hypocrisy that even defending it or trying to make a point will make you a huge hypocrite. Lore Olympus does too much of “yes we can do this but no we cannot at the same time”, it’s never standing clear on beliefs, personalities, morals, relationships, etc. Everything always has to be both at the same time and I’m thinking the reason for that is because Rachel probably thought this would help her case more, like is pedophilia inside of the story? In a way yes but also no. Is feminism in the story? In a way yes but also no. Is mental health in the story? In a ways yes but also no. Are y’all seeing the pattern? Someone from outside of this fandom with zero knowledge about Lore Olympus cannot outright say that “Lore Olympus doesn’t talk about sexual traumas” because it does but it doesn’t at the same time. They just use both sides of every topic they decide to throw into the story that day so theirs never a person who can genuinely be upset that something isn’t there because it is, it’s just not being handled well or written with any decency.

Also last thing, I wish that a lot of the fans would stop the blatant sexualization of the characters it’s so uncomfortable to sit through and a lot of the comments are dehumanizing. There’s a difference between saying that the characters are hot and begging for them to literally scramble your insides and headcanoning how they fuck each other. Genuinely it’s getting out of control with how you guys treat this story like it’s some kind of kinky fanfic (which I can’t even blame you for because that’s what this is to Rachel at this point) mainly because there’s serious topics being discussed in your beloved comic that your amazing author decided to write into this series. So no, it’s never been about watching these random characters fuck each other it’s always been so much “deeper” than that sadly and even though I’ll never stop explaining how Lore Olympus never should’ve put those very real and serious conversations in her story if she was not going to shed any positive or even respectful light on those themes because it’s giving the readers a horrible depiction of all of them I will say that you all need to settle the fuck down and start realizing that this comic is more than seeing Persephone and Hades get naked (fucking barely, you don’t even see anything yet everyone still wants more detailed and graphic scenes).

[sinkableruby]

What are your top 5 Ougi scenes/appearances?

good ask to send me than,k you

starting from 5 well i guess i dont really have like a strict order except for maybe the top one i dont know i dont know i love all of them actually im just gonna do it in chrono order

um spoilers of course dont read this if u havent finished the whole anime (the whole anime!) there will be screencaps...

okay if im going chronoogically i must give my hat to owarimonogtari part 1. wait FUCK theres so many scenes in that shit.......... im gonna be running out of space damnit.... well to summarize it BRIEFLY... (how the fuck do you even summarize it briefly my feelings are large and want to burst out of my chest)... ougis sinister leading araragi down dark paths and poking at his past and knowing the deal but playing-dumbery and antics are just amazing. and shes so cool as she does it how did she get to be that cool! evil and cool.... thats the summary but the scene i would want to talk about is of course the showdown with hanekawa (the first one i guess). uh bc its like really funny? the showdown is great its such a fun buildup of tension and they're like passive-aggressive/plain-aggressive-but-still-loosely-following-social-boundaries trying fighting each other... its great. i think in the light novels when hanekawa says 'but i would have done a better job' ougis smile freezes. you can hear the glass break. you can just hear her in her head shes going like ".......................bitch,? so that's how you wanna play it?" i wish that got animated sometimes. and also of course. it ends how it ends.

its an incredible moment because literally the moment she says this you're like ah. i see. so ougi loses. LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

LIKE GG NO RE 😭😭😭😭😭😭 SORRY OUGI YOU LOST.... DONMAI ITS OK DONT WORRY ABOUT IT. YOU DONT EVEN HAVE TO SEE ANYTHING AFTER ITS LIKE AH. GOTCHA. i was rooting for her to win when i was watching but... this was just so funny. the best way for things to have gone i think.

its also so good how she stands there after like. fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.......... usually ougi is the one doing things to people and its funny but this is also just so hilarious its done so well.

i also want to talk about otori, because ougi in otori is very cool. my first time watching otori i was very in tune with nadeko so hearing ougi do a kinda takedown of her was a very interesting experience for me. she was very sinister and severe and foreboding...... very fun. and of course when it turns out she's been tugging at the strings..... heeheehee THATS SO COOL. i mean looking at these scenes like some of these shots are so cool.

^ the face of someone so evil......

ok going later

i never see people talking about this one but the scene in hitagi rendevous in owari ge that happens on the second episode after the ending is like. oogh. its like the big instance before the finale proper in ougi dark where the show starts fucking slapping you in the face screaming "PAY ATTENTION THERE'S SOMETHING IMPORTANT HAPPENING HERE"

like this shot this FUCKING SHOT. is it just me? is it just me am i the only one who feels acute pain at this? there's something about it thats just so............... like somethings wrong. like thats what i feel like something is wrong and im concerned for this person you feel me?

shes so tired trying to get his attention and do her job and all that shes pressing the doorbell laying down... and then she sees him and goes like 'im exhausted' and just keeps girlbossing like. and like asks araragi (from her perspective) not to kill her and hes just like no and shes just like damn that sucks oh well lol. like imagine being alive for 6 months having no home (shes laying on the god damn nameplate of his house augh...) and knowing full well you're about to die, the things youre seeing now will be some of the last things you ever experience before your consciousness is gone forever (bc she isnt going to hell shes being erased). that's so cool and awesome (horrifying). anyway ougi doesnt care shes got a job to do X) (shes so insane i love her)

also that home thing and the tiredness thing is one of the big things i wrote ougi stay about so ill just take the chance to plug it if ur still reading this go read my fic! i like it a lot i think its nice. its mostly funny but it also talks about this stuff too a bit. go read it

ok next.

dont know whether to count the different parts of this scene as separate or not but i think it shouldnt be separated bc its all important to the scene and that is OF COURSE: ougi dark starting with ougi's convo with tsukihi (the build up… it's oddly calm so you feel somewhat reassured but you KNOW something's going to happen… the buildup of tension starts here and keeps rising). the contents of that conversation, near the end are like, really cool things to be included because up until that point we still dont have SO much insight as to who ougi is but she opens up a bit to tsukihi here and its kind of a paradigm shift to see.

there's something so poignant about this fraught mood...

such an ougi way of talking about one's feelings about oneself...

at least for me when i was watching i was already like, kinda rooting for ougi bc i wanted bad things to happen to araragi (lol) but also like. ougis just so insanely entertaining and fun that like, uh obviously i would root for her here. so when this fun silly funny little fun character starts bustin out the:

its like woah wait huh back up hold on a second there. i care you>???????

like literally the whole confrontation with ougi and araragi it is just like oh no since when did i care about this character so much oh no oh god oh fuck...

like how come they gotta hit me with all these gut punches what did i do to deserve this

like whats so cool about it is with how its directed and the score (and the voice acting!! the seiyuu did an INCREDIBLE job) and everything you can tell shes scared but like again shes actually insane so she's just gonna be like yeah this is the right way for things to happen

(it seems a lot like she did all this wanting the outcome of her losing to araragi, at least to me. hanekawa also says so in the commentary tracks of ougi dark. so thats another layer. theres so many layers... i dont know how many of these layers people pick up on but by golly do i pick up on them)

and of course he saves her (imagine if he didnt? id kill him. WAIT ACTUALLY THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO ARE LIKE "ARARAGI SHOULDNT HAVE SAVED HER" NEVER GO ON THE REDDIT DISCORD SERVER FOR MONOGATARI PEOPLE ACTUALLY THINK THIS WAY IM LITERALLY GOING TO KILL THEM ITS SO. ok i wont talk about it), and she gets mad and its like i KNEW you were putting up a bold front you had emotions this whole time and then its like. oh you had emotions this whole time and you were totally aware of everything and just kinda had to deal with it thats kinda fucked up (i think a lot about how being an oddity born of self-criticism necessarily means you have to be self-aware and how that leads to ougi being a kind of exceptional type of oddity and like how it ties into identity and like... all that stuff). but the emotional breakdown/outburst is so good... augggghhghhh its so good 😭😭😭

(like i think sometimes about how if they had done this wrong, it would feel out of place for ougis generally not-emotion-showing character/not emotional in general character, but they did it so well... its so good)

and of COURSE to cap off this perfect beautiful wonderful scene we get THE GWEH AKA THE PEAK OF FICTION. IT DOESNT GET BETTER THAN THIS. NO IM NOT JOKING. LITERALLY WHEN I SAW THIS I HAD AN EPIPHANY. NOT JUST BECAUSE ITS ADORABLE BUT BECAUSE ITS LIKE HOLY SHIT INTUITIVELY A PART OF ME UNDERSTANDS. THIS *IS* **THE** BEST CHARACTER. and i went to go pace around my room being hype about it. im not joking really bc the novel talks about it being like "an utterly unattractive true-to-life" groan or something that proves she has "substance" which is like... yeah! she's her own person! not just made of lies or w/e!! the gweh actually ties everything together in such a perfect way and i am physically incapable of remaining in bad mood after i see it. i saw it the first time and i was like :O -> :) -> :DDDDDDDDDD and that hasn't changed since it will always put a smile on my face 😌

also also ougi in zoku owari is incredible too so good. the TEEHEE THE TEEHEE IS SO AMAZING. like YEAH!!!! YOURE A LITTLE ROTTEN PRANKSTER TEEHEE!!!!!! YEAH!!!! TRICKSTER TIME TIME TO BE TRICKY A TRICKY LITTLE TRICKSTER YEAH!!!!!!!!!!! and we get more classic ougi exposition/explanation..... havent talked about this as much but their ideas are so interesting.... theyre so interesting and cool i would pay to hear them share ideas about things.............. anyway one other thing i really appreciate about this scene is the shared intimacy between ougi and araragi. it feels more personal yk. this sorta comfortable, natural, thoughtless intimacy is something i absolutely adore about their dynamic but it basically only happens right here in zoku owari, and not even so much in the light novel version. its interesting... i want to write about it. im GOING to write about it mark my words

also honorable mention to ougi in hanamonogatari. theres nothing like big enough about these scenes to mention in comparison with the rest of them bc theyre so short but. BOY OUGI YEAHHHHHHHHHHH HES TRANS WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO i saw that and i was like >:) yeah kanbaru wym hes been a boy this whole time >:)))) don't misgender him god...... >:))))))))))))) (AND HE LOOKS SO COOL THEY ANIMATED HIM SO COOL BC HES IN BOYMODE HES SUCH A BOY FUCK YEAH)

also fuck i didnt talk about the whole planetarium dream scene. that was also good.

ummm yeah i could just talk about this forever and keep talking about scenes and stuff but ill leave it here bc u said 5 and ive already technically named like 7 at least so. yeah. but i dont really have like a ranking order necessarily, except for ougi dark bc its just so so so SO good.

thank you for enabling my derangement ive been writing this since u sent it to me im so ougipilled right now you wouldnt even believe. im ougi wired.

[ragingbookdragon]

Let It All Come Crashing Down

Batbrother x Batfamily One-Shot

Word Count: 2K Warnings: Explicit Language, Mentions of Past Assault/Abuse

Author's Note: One of my favorite episodes of Criminal Minds was always the one where Morgan came face to face with his abuser. The dialogue at the end of the episode fits Batbrother's past too. But, this does mention past assault. If this is a triggering subject, please don't read. -Thorne

**********************************************************************

When he’d told Dick about the incident when he was seventeen, he didn’t expect it was going to come back full front. He’d kept tabs on the man whenever his former CO would move bases, when he promoted, when he eventually retired and relocated to Gotham City, opening a military assistance center. It was a farce, and he knew it. A place where the old CO could still continue his reign of fear on those still in the military and those outside.

***

He stared at the screen in the Batcave, ignoring the bickering of his youngest sibling and his father’s oldest friend, recounting every moment that led to the mission. A woman his age found dead, murdered, the brother charged with the crime. All evidence supported the facts, but (Y/N) knew. He knew deep down something else was going on, especially when he learned that the brother had attended the center in Gotham.

“Isaac Keegan is going to be sent to Blackgate tonight,” Bruce murmured. “He won’t last the night.”

(Y/N) shook his head. “He didn’t do this.”

His father glanced at him. “How do you know?”

“Doesn’t matter how I know,” he retorted with mild annoyance. “But I know who really did this.” He turned, glancing at Ghost-Maker. “Think you can get Isaac out of the armed van and back here without anyone dying?”

The vigilante cocked his arms over his chest. “Of course. But why do you wanna talk to him?”

“I don’t. But I need him alive long enough to get a confession out of the real killer.” (Y/N) answered, looking at Tim with a gaze that had his younger brother’s spine going straight; he could feel the seriousness ebbing from his older brother. “And I’m going to need your help with this.”

***

He didn’t like stepping into enemy territory without protection. He felt naked without his nano suit, even more so without his sidearm, but the last thing he needed was for the metal detectors in the building to go off and let the remaining people inside know he was there.

Slipping down the halls, he took a moment to catch his breath before he turned the corner into his old CO’s office.

“Davis.”

The older man looked up, eyes widening at the sight of his former subordinate. “(Y/N)? Is that—you’re alive?”

“I am,” he answered and Davis’ face split into a fake smile.

“I thought you’d died years ago in Afghanistan.”

“Not exactly.” (Y/N) kept away from the desk, away from close contact; he knew he could take the man, but he wanted the confession first before they came to blows, if they did. “I heard about Jessica Keegan.”

Davis frowned. “It’s a shame what happened to her. Even more so a shame that Isaac was the one who did it.” He shook his head. “I thought he was doing to well with his treatments too.”

(Y/N) tapped the device in his pocket. Now Tim. “Except that Isaac didn’t kill Jessica.”

“Excuse me?”

“All these years, I’ve kept my mouth shut,” (Y/N) said. “I’ve let you go on being a hero. Admiral Davis, the great war hero.”

“What in the world are you talking about?” Davis questioned, face contorting in confusion and the younger man scowled.

“God, I was so afraid of you when we were in Afghanistan,” he admitted. “I was afraid of going to Command about it all. Afraid of losing every promotion and achievement I was being given.” (Y/N) stepped forward, expression shifting to anger. “But that’s how you’ve always worked, isn’t it? You made sure there was a helluva lot to lose if someone came forward, didn’t you?”

“I don’t know what you think you remember about Afghanistan,” Davis said. “But—”

“No, no, no,” he interrupted. “See it’s not what I remember that’s going to hurt you, Davis. The business between us has been over way too long ago to matter.” (Y/N) explained. “You’re protected by a statute of limitations and that’s my fault.”

Davis shrugged. “Then good evening.”

He glared. “You set Isaac up! You knew his sister wanted him to call someone about you. So you killed her and framed him as a distressed veteran?” (Y/N)’s face pinched as he accused, “You killed her because you knew someone was going to piece it all together and come after you, didn’t you?”

“Now you’re just throwing accusations around.” Davis replied and (Y/N) slapped a decoration off his desk.

It shattered and he shouted, “God, I should’ve told someone about you when I was in Afghanistan! When you were ‘training’ me.” He took another step forward, voice lowering dangerously. “Well, you know what happens in cases like this? Once that dam breaks, the flood comes.”

He raised a finger. “One servicemember stands up, just one. And then another one, and another. Because they’re not afraid of your repercussions anymore—they know they’re not alone.” (Y/N) tipped his head up. “Isaac Keegan is your dam.”

For the first time since they’d started speaking, Davis showed his anger as he barked, “Whatever lies Isaac told you—”

“THEY ARE NOT LIES!” (Y/N) yelled. “YOU DID THE SAME THINGS TO ME!”

“I didn’t do a damn thing to you or to Isaac—”

“One by one, they’re going to pile up until there’s so many accusations, you can’t say that they’re all lies!”

Davis thrust his hands to his chest. “Do you have any idea how many men and women I helped promote? How many lives I’ve saved with my service?” He gestured to (Y/N). “Look at you! You would’ve been dead in a shallow grave if I hadn’t helped you.”

“Yeah, well that shit wasn’t for free, was it?” (Y/N) demanded, throat tightening with emotion.

“I pulled you out of the gutter.” Davis murmured.

He shook his head, the tears of anger flashing the pain from his voice. “I pulled myself out of the gutter! All the way to the top military squads! I did that!”

“You’re saying I had nothing to do with making you who you are?” Davis questioned, a look of offense on his face.

(Y/N)’s rage cooled, shoulders sinking back as he raised his head and admitted, “No Davis. Actually, I’m saying you have everything to do with making me who I am.” He gazed at the man. “Because of what you did to me, I’m the man who’s going to spend the rest of his life making sure abusers of power like you face the consequences.”

“(Y/N),” Davis comforted. “I never meant to hurt you.” His expression turned sympathetic. “You could’ve said no.”

He turned his head away, jaw clenching so hard it hurt, then he looked back at him, and two men turned the doorway. (Y/N) watched Davis’ eyes widen in shock.

“Quinton Davis, you’re under arrest for the rape and murder of Jessica Keegan.” The two military police officers walked around (Y/N), and each took an arm.

Davis shifted. “I’ve helped a lot of veterans and service members.” He started thrashing. “Nothing in this goddamn city is going to be the same with me. Without the center, who’s going to look after them?”

His expression hardened. “Wayne Enterprises will. I will.”

“Wait a minute damnit!” he looked at (Y/N), pleading, “(Y/N), please, isn’t there anything you can do for me?”

(Y/N) got in Davis’ face. “You can rot in hell.”

He watched the MP’s drag away the screaming man before letting out a shaky breath and reaching up to his chest, yanking off the necklace that had the camera built into it. Tim had no doubt cut the feed by now and he shoved it in his pocket, free hand coming up to wipe away the tears in his eyes.

***

“What happens now?” the young man asked, dark circles under his eyes making him seem wearier.

(Y/N) sighed. “There’s going to be a trial. Davis will face the consequences.”

Isaac frowned. “I’m going to have to testify, aren’t I?”

“Yes. But I know who the prosecutor is. She’s good. She’ll nail Davis to the wall for everything.”

“I…I don’t know if I can do it.”

He reached out and placed a hand on the man’s shoulder. “Then do it for Jessica.”

“I miss her.” Isaac whispered, head lowering as he sniffed. “I should’ve spoken out sooner.”

“I know,” (Y/N) murmured. “I feel the same.”

His head cocked up, teary eyes gazing into (Y/N)’s. “Will you be there?”

“I’ll probably be called by the prosecutors to testify.” He shrugged. “But with the statute of limitations, I don’t know how much it’s going to weight in our favor.”

“But you already told the world about your past with Davis?” Isaac said. “We—we all watched it live.”

“That was just the start.” (Y/N) said. “We have to see it to the end. For all the servicemen and women he abused over the years.” He turned, looking at Nightwing and Red Hood. “They’ll take you back to your apartment.”

Isaac nodded, starting to follow, then he stopped and looked back at (Y/N). “How’d you go on after Afghanistan?”

He met the young man’s eyes, then he glanced at his family. “I was still needed. Still am.” (Y/N) turned back to Isaac. “You never forget it…but it does get better.” He stuck his hand out. “And I’ll be there when you need me.”

They shook hands and he watched Isaac walk off with his brothers before he turned and moved to the railing overlooking Gotham Bay. A multitude of emotions swirled in his chest, but a sense of relief rested on his shoulders, and he let his head drop, the tears starting to drip down his cheeks.

Someone’s hand rested between his shoulder blades, followed by a deep voice comforting, “It’s okay, son.”

He shook his head. “I should’ve said something earlier.”

“It’s not your fault,” Bruce affirmed. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

(Y/N) looked up, gazing at his father. “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” the man murmured, expression soft. “But why didn’t you come to me?”

He paused, inhaling shakily as he said, “It only lasted for a short time. I was promoted and inducted into the super soldier program.” He shrugged. “By the time I finally wanted to tell someone, Davis had already left the compound and too much time had passed for it to matter.”

(Y/N) gazed out at the water. “It’s not over…but the world knows what he really is now. And all the people who suffered are going to see justice.”

Bruce leaned on the railing next to him. “You don’t show many signs of a survivor,” he noted. “You keep it all under wraps.”

“I learned during the super soldier program that there are worse things than what happened to me.” (Y/N) sighed. “Davis’ abuse might be what makes me so hateful of abusers, but when I started the team, I refused to let it control me and my life.” He raised his head. “I was going to live my life to the fullest, with whoever I wanted and even if I never told anyone, that was going to be the one part of me no one would ever take away.”

His father observed him for a moment then he stood, nudging (Y/N) until he did too; they looked at one another, a father and a son, and Bruce said, “I’m proud of you, (Y/N). For everything.”

(Y/N)’s mouth opened and snapped shut once, twice, a third time, then he raised one hand to cover his eyes as the lower half of his face twisted in pain, the other fumbling blindly for Bruce. His father caught him, one strong arm wrapping around (Y/N)’s back, the other pressing his son’s head to his shoulder.

“I’m here son,” he murmured. “I’m always going to be here.” He pressed his lips to the young man’s temple. “And I love you son. So much.”

“I love you too, dad,” he choked out, holding onto his father for dear life.

[romanogers-lyrics]

TFAWS Ep 5: finally some good fucking ✨vindication✨

Scratch that rewind what I said- this is the best episode (maybe in comic book tv history). Closure, growth, and redemption 🙌 just when I was worried they wouldn’t be able to tie things up they fucking give me this 😩🤩👏✊🏽

Holy hell my poor heart died and ascended to the moon to hang out with Steve and Natasha. ✨Goddamn the mastery of storytelling in this episode is why I love the MCU so much ✨

The opening fight between Walker, Bucky, and Sam had me on the edge of my seat. Like in most fights you know the stakes are low because the main heroes always win but this fight... whew it was consequential and more personal than the civil war fight imo. I genuinely was worried about the outcome for Sam and Bucky physically and emotionally. Every beat was character driven! This was cathartic. 🙌 the stunt coordinators knocked it out of the park lovelovelove 💕.

“I am captain America” homie you giving me Gollum vibes. “It’s (the shield) MINE!” Like-

So many creative stunts with the wings!!!

Bucky and Sam working TOGETHER

BUCKY DROPPING THE SHIELD AT SAM’S FEET 😭

The golden light seeping into the frame at the end of the fight 🤌🏼

Sam wiping the blood off the shield. 🥲 I can’t even articulate but it makes me feel-

Sammy’s wings got snapped off and he eventually left them with Torres (passing the mantle?) which symbolizes Sam growing out of his old super hero role. It was cleansing. He’s ready to be more. He’s ready to take action rather than let things happen to him 👏

Baby boy Torres trying to talk to Mr Bucky 🥺. You have both sleeves today Mr Bucky sir 💕

I want no I NEED 😫Torres to fly in with the wings next episode.

How we feeling about Walker?? On the one hand I feel him. Us gov did him dirty but at the same time he made the choices he made. Maybe there is room for redemption? Idk... 🙃 or will he continue to get worse?

I am SO glad that Sam went back to talk to isaiah. He needed to know the full story. He needed closure. I could ramble on and on but the writers made the points so much better than I could but just-

Steve did the exact same thing as Isaiah in the first avenger. He went behind enemy lines to rescue Bucky- without permission! He was a hero for it. And Isaiah was thrown in jail? The double standard is so frustrating

I think Isiah’s point that “no self respecting black man” would use the shield makes sense with his background and story. It makes me sick what was done to him. Things really haven’t changed 😞. At this point I honestly wasn’t sure what Sam was going to do. More later on about this-

Zemo’s theme is so beautiful every time I hear it. 🤌🏼🤌🏼🤌🏼🤌🏼

What a beautiful scene. Cinematography 💯 Such a great moment between Bucky and Zemo. Zemo fully expects to die and then Bucky does the one thing zemo didn’t expect- the one thing he wasn’t “programmed” to do. Fuuuuuckcjfkekxn

“I crossed my name off in your book” 😭. He obviously grew to respect Bucky and wants him to have peace at last with all the civil war stuff.

Ayo back to calling Bucky white wolf 🐺 love to see it.

The kids playing with the shield and tracing the star has me CRYING. Kids are our hope and they still see something special in the shield. They still believe in it. 😭 such a small moment completely floored me.

Wholesome boat fix up 🥺. I feel like this is the montage where SamBucky fall in love 😂

When Sarah and Sam are talking about the boat- how it is their history- I think again of Isaiah. His history was erased. Sam has to preserve his history ✊🏽

Sarah is a goddamn queen and I Stan 🤌🏼✨

The montage was just a sip of cool water in the desert of trauma that is the MCU.

OKEEEE the conversation between Sam and Bucky where they’re tossing the shield is great on so many levels 😍:

Physically the shield matches the dynamic of the convo. Someone makes a point and throws it. Someone accepts what that person said and catches the shield. Bucky physically offers the shield when he says “I’m sorry” and Sam accepts the shield AND the apology.

The difference between avenging and amending. I was surprised they even used that word bc it calls out the avengers for maybe not doing the emotional work involved in being a hero. Healing is part of the hero job now. #phase4

A small detail but as a person of color I valued it; when Bucky said I’m sorry Sam did not say “it’s okay” or “no worries” because he didn’t have to, I feel like as a POC I’m always making white people feel better and for once I’d like to be confident enough to just accept someone’s apology outright and know I deserve it.

Pivotal when Sam said “it doesn’t matter what Steve thought” at first I was like biiiihhh??! 😠 but he had a point. Both Sam and Bucky have been trying to do hold onto another person who is gone. They gotta heal but more importantly they have to find their own reasons to keep fighting.

The training montage 🤌🏼🙌🤩🥲🥺😭✊🏽. Like FEED ME YEs WE ARE EATiNG. Sammy deserves it all

Sam’s cap theme music is similar to Steve’s but still different. Goddamn so beautiful 💕💕😩

Sam has been pretty passive in this show- almost wanting confirmation he did the right thing. Isaiah didn’t give Sam that comfort but neither did Bucky at first. Sam had to make his own choice 😤✊🏽

It’s a heavy burden to be cap knowing all the shit that has come before but Sam is the only one who can make that decision to be or not to be. And he’s seen the alternative now. In life taking action and taking control of our situation is empowering but always harder than doing nothing. He says it best- what’s the point of all that struggle if you’re not going keep on fighting ✊🏽🥺 I love and respect Sam so much 😭 spoken like captain America! 👏

Show me the suit you COWARDS I WANNA SEe

Goddamnit damnit to hell... I need to SEE IT

Is Sharon setting a trap for Karli???

🚨 end credit: I’m not sure if they are making an iron man comparison. What do you guys think?

Ready for the showdown throwdown next week 👀

All in all it was fucking wild ya’ll and I felt catharsis watching this and so fucking hopeful. I cry 😭

Please feel free to share any thoughts you have about this episode💕

there’s so much in this show that is world building within mcu but also in greater conversations about heroism and power. It is a moral re evaluation of the superhero. Malcom Spellman being head writer you know this shit is not happenstance it is intentional. The took the long road and it totally paid off in this episode 😭

🙇🏻‍♀️ I am emotionally manipulated by this show 🙇🏻‍♀️

Huge shout out to all the cast and crew for making something both respectful to the lore but also challenging it to be better 🙌

My ep 4 review:

Tag list: @soliloquy-of-nemo

[toomanyfandoms02]

Thoughts - Part 1 // Matthew Gray Gubler x Reader

This timeline is set around 2006 because that's when the actually 2nd season of Criminal Minds was going on. So Matthew is about 26.

Summary - Soulmate AU! Once you turn 18, you can hear some of your soulmates thoughts. And when you meet, your thoughts go silent for 30 seconds. Readers soulmate is quite the character. (Anything you see in bold is the other persons thought.)

Word count : 2.1k

This is kind of experimental lmao, lemme know if you like it :)))

"What was your first soulmate thought y/n?" I got this question often, everyone did. This time it was asked by a new friend of mine, we met in our cinematography class this semester at LAFS ( Los Angeles Film School ).

"I think my story is one of the more fun ones."

"I bet mines better." Her eyes held promise, but I wasn't sure she could beat me.

*It was currently 1:15 pm, and I was waiting patiently for my first soulmate thought. I was with my best friend Marley, we sat in the cafeteria of my college, mind you, surrounded by other people.*

*"What time were you born again?" She had asked the question so many times this hour, by the way she was bouncing, you would think that we were waiting for hers.*

*"1:19 pm for the last time Marley." I giggled, nudging her shoulder. I took a bite of the cupcake she had bought me for my birthday. It took no time for the clock to hit 1:19, I anxiously waited to hear something, anything.*

"Now disclaimer." I told my friend, who I now knew as Alex. "I knew that some people had reported that their first soulmate thoughts were kind of, *loud*. But I can tell you that I was severely unprepared."

*Only 30 seconds after my watch ticked past 1:19, I heard a near deafening screech in my head.*

***"What the fuck?!"** The thought was so obnoxious and loud that I spit the fluffy pastry from my mouth and directly onto the back of another person, holding tightly to my ears, this did not help.*

*"What's going on? What did they say?" Marley leaned over to me, rubbing my back with a horrified look. Not long after, the man I had spit on turned around with a furious look.*

*"Hey I'm so sorry." I choked out, waving a hand at the man. "My soulmate thought was painful." The man rolled his eyes with an angry huff, taking his cardigan off and turning back to his table.*

*"What did they say y/n?!" There she went again, bouncing like a dodgeball.*

*"What the fuck." My eyes darted to hers, narrowed slightly. She furrowed her brows at me. "He literally thought, what the fuck, so loudly."*

Alex was on the floor giggling like a fiend, she held her stomache as if her guts would spill out with so much joy.

"Nope, you're right." She could barely speak between laughter. "I can't beat that." She promptly wiped the tears from her eyes, composing herself. "So you haven't met him yet?" She let out a final sigh.

"Nope. When I meet him, I kinda wanna slap him." A sly smile made it's way onto my lips. "The little shit thinks the weirdest things! I have had to deal with his thoughts for 4 years, and I'm ready for the complete silent bliss when I meet him." I laid my head back on the couch.

**I would really like a fruit roll up right now.**

"Speak of the idiot, he really wants a fruit roll up right now." Alex shook her head at me.

"Maybe he will be funny?"

"We'll see about that. What was your first soulmate thought?"

-

Tonight was Marley and I's 'introduction night.' Similar to a movie night, we have a night every two weeks where we either introduce the other to a new show or movie, alternating turns.

"I think you'll like this one." She plopped onto the loveseat, nearly throwing and spilling the hot popcorn on me while grabbing the remote. "It's a crime show, just started last year so after this season we can just keep up with it. If you like it of course." The show was flipped onto the first episode, it was a man talking about an unsub, or unidentified subject. Then a younger guy walked in, interrupting him.

"Who is that guy?" The words flew from my mouth before I could even think them.

"Spencer Reid-"

"No, I mean his *real* name. He looks *so* familiar." It felt like my brain was eating itself alive, why did he look so familiar.

"I think his name is Matthew Gray Gubler." Marley shrugged, not taking her eyes off the screen.

"Has he been in anything else but this?"

"He models a lot. That's probably where you saw him." She pushed some magazines around on her coffee table and threw one at me. "He's on page 16, Hilfiger Jean's." I flipped to the page, seeing his face again.

"Wow, he is something else. I must have just unknowingly saw him in a magazine somewhere."

"I know! Once I saw him on here, I knew you would think he was cute too. Plus, he's a genius. I figured this would be another Peter Parker situation again." She teased, poking at my giant crush on Spiderman AKA Toby Maguire a few years ago.

"Shut up!" I snickered, throwing a pillow at her head. My own thoughts were interrupted by one that was not my own.

**I wish Halloween would come faster.**

"Its literally May." I whispered to myself, earning a weird look from Marley. This is the typical weird thought, Halloween is big on his mind.

I of course ended up loving the show. ~~And may or may not have had a huge crush on Spencer Reid already.~~

I informed Marley that we would most certainly be catching up on the show regularly, making that out new weekly thing for a while.

Though I could truly not get that Matthew guy out of my head, and I had a weird feeling it wasn't just because I thought he was super hot.

Matthew

**Who is Matthew Gray Gubler?**

The thought nearly made me spit out my coffee as I walked through the set. I knew for sure that wasn't my thought.

*No shit sherlock.*

Now *that* was my thought.

The question swirled around in my head, I really wanted to just think,

*I'm Matthew Gray Gubler!*

Just to make this whole process easier. Who knows if she could even actually *hear* it if I did answer her, or that she would believe me.

So lost in my train of thoughts, pun intended, I ran right into a punch cart.

"Holy shit!" The punch came spilling down right onto my khaki pants. I rested my forehead on the rim of my coffee mug. "I'm so sorry Terry, I was really caught up in my head."

"It's alright." He pulled a towel from his back pocket, throwing it onto the puddle that was forming on the wood floor. "Thinkin' about a girl?"

"Yes actually, thinking about my soulmate. Let me help you with that." I kneeled down on the floor, wiping up the spill. "Sorry again."

"It's all good Matthew." He dragged the cart to the opposite side of the room.

**Why can I not focus damnit?! This trip is suppose to be fun. Focus y/n. Focus!**

Y/n! I've never heard her name before. Maybe shes getting closer to me.

I set my coffee on the table of the reading room, pulling my script out and sitting next to AJ.

"You seem out of it today, are you feeling okay?" She tapped my shoulder. "I saw you run directly into the lunch cart." She clearly tried to suppress a giggle.

"How did you meet Nathan? How did you do it?" My script was not slammed onto the table, my hands pressed firmly on top of it.

"Are you worried about soulmates again? Matthew, she will come to you-"

"She said my name!!" My hands flailed wilding in the air. "I heard her think it! This sucks." I laughed a bit at the end, feeling ridiculous and vulnerable. Ask phone buzzed on the table, interrupting my dilemma.

"Well I hate to stop you in the middle of this debacle, but we have a film class coming in to observe, I guess sit was suppose to be a surprise." AJ shrugged with a pity smile, which is my least favorite version of a smile. I dramatically slammed my head on the back of my rolling chair, groaning like a child.

"Come on Gubler, we don't even have to do anything, we just have to act normal so they can observe. Let's go educate some college kids." She stood above me, patting my head and dragging my seat from the table a few inches. I reluctantly stood up and left the reading room.

To be clear, if it were any other day than the day that I found out my soulmates name, I would be totally in the game. I love teaching people, I love being an inspiration, but all I could think about was how close yet how far I was from meeting the love of my life. I shook it all off, physically and mentally, while heading to the set.

*Time to get my head in the game.*

I hope my soulmate heard that and started thinking of highschool musical.

-

"Action!" I held my prop gun in my hand while following Shermar, he proceeded to kick a door down that had a camera on the other side to capture it. The class that was observing sat on the other side of the door, seeing all of the behind the scenes that goes on during filming.

To avoid making direct eye contact with the camera, I often look right past it. So instead of making eye contact with the camera, I made it with a girl.

Then it was silent.

I stopped in the doorway, leading AJ to slam right into me on her way through the door.

"What the hell are you doing Matthew?"

"Cut!"

**You have got to be fucking kidding me.**

We did not break our stare, her eyes wide now with the realization.

*Wow.*

The girl sitting next to her was shaking her shoulder violently, but she sat unfazed.

"Can you excuse me for a second?" Bobby Roth, our director for the day looked at me like I was dumb, inevitably giving in.

"Whatever, take 5 guys."

I immediately waltzed past the cameraman and over to, who I could only assume, was my soulmate. The girl next to her was promptly slapping her arm and squealing like a pig, but she was giving her quite the death stare.

*She's my kind of girl already.*

Right as I thought that, she looke duo at me with a large grin and a tilt of the head.

*Shit.*

**Damn, even cuter in person.**

"Thank you." I couldn't suppress the automatic pep in my step meeting her. "I'm Matthew, you must be y/n?" It came out as a question because I was worried I would be wrong, and embarrass myself.

Which I've done, many times.

"You know my name?"

"I uh, I heard you think it." I pointed to my head, nodding awkwardly.

"You are so weird." She laughed, which made my face reddened more 3x more than I'm sure it already was.

"What?" I managed to murmur out.

"Well, you just think about weird stuff, mostly Halloween though." She was slowly smiling more as she spoke of me, which made my heart skip a few beats. She was so much more beautiful than I had pictured her. Her eyes held every intelligent thought that I had ever heard from her, and I knew right then that the eyes were the door to the soul. "Now that I'm here," she finally stood to my level, poking at my chest. "Do you wanna do a couples costume? This year?" She did a cute half shrug, as if I would say no.

"Oh my God, you really are my soulmate." I pulled her into a hug, a tight one, never wanting to let her go now that I'd found her.

"Alright guys! Let's go!" Bobby motioned everyone back to the set.

"Yeah, get out there *Spencer*." She patted her hand on my cheek. I didn't know if I hoped that she *did* see or *didn't* see how much I already liked her on my face, but I could feel the admiration spilling from my features.

"I- I'll talk to you after this!" I stumbled backwards from her, going back to the set and awkwardly running my back into the cameraman.

"Can't wait!" She waved with a flushed face, sitting back down next to her friend who was now shaking both of her shoulders violently.

*This is the best day of my life.*

**Same.**

---------

I've got a few more Soulmat AU ideas if you want more! I just don't know if theres any demand, so LEMME KNOW.

[heretherebedork]

THE ENDING FOR OSSANS LOVE. WE DID IT THEY DID A NON-COMEDY KISS. INITIATED BY TIN TOO. WE WON FELLAS.

but seriously, this episode was wild from start to finish. i watched it live on tv so i was just an anxious mess during the ad breaks wondering whether the last 30, 20, 10 minutes could really tie up the story. and it did! i’m still amazed at how much happens in one episode. we really went from siu muk screaming about how tin should’ve thought through the marriage to them kissing on the couch? and i’d like to think the easter egg is a lawyer asking them these questions before letting them sign their marriage papers but i’m getting ahead of myself

so KK telling tin to go find muk was quite surprising to me. i thought even if deep down KK knew tin wasn’t genuine with his romantic love for KK or couldn’t reciprocate it the way KK wants, he’d rather play pretend than let Tin go, so truly, props to him for being the bigger man and being mature (if thats the term) and encouraging Tin to go find ah muk. i think it’s also partly because he does love Tin enough to want him to have a happy future and not be so selfish as to keep him when both parties aren’t gonna be 100% happy with it.

and then when muk tried to tell tin they wouldn’t have a good future together but obviously just saying without any fight in him? honestly i kinda laughed, it felt like he included it just as an inside joke like, hey remember how i said this and we broke up but here you are ditching your marriage? we ended up right where we left off! (i can’t articulate this properly but i hope you understand HAHA). and Tin going like, i’m a big boy, let me choose :( and it’s true! he has indeed grown (sure he still can’t pack but i’m sure he’s more in touch with his feelings towards siu muk)

honestly? i’m very satisfied with the ending, and LOVED it when carmen took out her own recording device. i was wondering why ping gor just stopped using it after the scam. so glad they brought it back, esp through carmen and it helps solidify their relationship. this couple is truly iconic, i love their dynamic.

i still have so many thoughts but here are some nice stuff from their zoom after party: (1) literally everyone (even the producer) wants to do a movie adaptation or a second season (movie felt more ideal amongst them, but any continuum is nice). (2) for the last scene/ kissing scene, edan and anson actually did three takes with varying degrees of intensity. the one that aired was the middle one, and when asking whether they’d release the most intense one (apparently more mouth/lip movement), both edan and anson lo said they shouldn’t release it because they want it to happen in the movie/ sequel. (3) the cast thinks KK and Darren has potential. (4) the cast also thought louis and francesca should’ve kissed. (5) the hk adaptation is airing in japan HAHA (in fall) as well as a few other east asian countries. that’s all i recall for now.

thank you, francis, from the bottom of my heart, for answering my asks and allowing me to have someone to vent to, laugh at, and get emotionally wrecked together. i know you watch a bunch of other BL series but this has become my favourite show (i don’t watch a lot but when i watch shows i completely spiral) so i’m so happy to get to talk about it with someone. something so dangerous about asian dramas is finding people who want to talk about it (in english as well!) i’ll probably be in your askbox for a few more days sorting out my feelings but i loved going on your blog and seeing new posts about ossan’s love!

We got a comedy kiss turned real kiss! Which was wonderful. It was so, so good to see. I was SO WORRIED when Tin panicked at the kiss again but YESSS WE GOT THE KISS. I might watch those last few scenes with them again, tbh. They're just so GOOD and SWEET and HEARTFELT. What darling boys.

That episode was definitely a wild ride. They held out for the last minute to solve things. Siu Muk yelling about Tin not making up his mind just made me wanna scream, though. I mean, come on dude! You did break up with him for 'his own good'. What did you want him to do? You knew he still had feelings for you when you broke up with him! Stop it! I really wish Siu Muk had been the one to go after Tin, truly, and not have the failed scene at the bridge... but it was good to see Tin chase him down though.

Oh, that scene hurt so much. Siu Muk was so unsure and so scared and Tin, for the first time, genuinely made up his mind. He said 'This is me and I know myself, stop telling me who I am' and he meant it. Is he a fully competent and independent adult? No, but who is? He's capable of running a business and choosing who he loves and if he can't pack a bag... well, everyone has a weakness.

Oh man, a movie adaptation would be great. A second season would probably make me twitchy because EVERY. SINGLE. SECOND. SEASON. EVER. is like 'miscommunication and possible cheating!' and I don't want that for our boys. I want them to just be happy together. I'd only like a second season if they let Siu Muk and Tin be the secondary happy couple and make someone else be in that weird love triangle position. I'd actually love that! They'd make an amazing 'happy in the background' couple.

I want that kiss. DAMNIT. I want that KISS. I wanna see all the versions of the kiss and also more kisses, pleases. Just... Tin and Siu Muk kissing in general would be great and ideal and my favorite thing ever. I just want their future to be happy and content and full of love.

Oh, I am always glad to get show-specific asks, or any ask at all, and happy to chat and natter and share! Please, always feel free to hit me up. It's hard to find a BL I'm not watching (if you do, feel free to tell me about it because it's probably an accident!) I have too much free time, no life and a love of BL that is all encompassing. I've been so glad to know that other people share this show and the same deep thoughts about it and enjoyed all the same bits!

You are always welcome to hit me up and to chat. I've got plenty of headcanons I'm still considering for these characters so I look forward to seeing and hearing your post-show thoughts as well.

[potionsprefect]

Locked In (Ethan x F!MC)

Pairings: Ethan Ramsey x Victoria Clarke, Danny Cardinal x Sienna Trinh

Summary: Two young children are brought to Edenbrook suffering from a deadly disease. Can the team control it before time runs out?

Word count: 4.3k

Warnings: mentions of disease/illness, angst

A/N: Back at it again with a fic from A03. This one was inspired by ER episode season 8 episode 22 and season 9 episode 1. Also, imagine a world where the senator attack happened but Danny survived. I think we could all do with some more Danny x Sienna content.

Chapter 1- Fight to Survive

“Where’s my patient from exam one?” Jackie Varma said at large to the staff around her.

“Discharged herself. Had to get home to pick her kids up from school.” Danny Cardinal said not looking up from the computer.

“Damnit.” Jackie sighed taking a seat.

“Tough case?” Victoria Clarke said standing next to her.

“Something like that.”

“Wanna talk about it?” Victoria asked.

“No it’s ok. I’ll move on.” Jackie smiled.

“Doctors why are we sitting around, I think we have patients to see.” Zaid Mirani said handing out charts.

No one argued with the senior doctor. He was right but he’d never sat down once. It was a surprise to everyone that his legs hadn’t clotted up in the years he’d been working.

“Doctor Trinh, lab test back on the kid in exam three.” Danny handed Sienna a sheet of paper.

“Thanks Danny.” Sienna smiled and headed off to see the said patient. Danny’s gaze lingered on her as she walked off and when he turned away he was met with the amused faces of Jackie and Victoria.

“What?” Danny said turning a bright shade of red.

“Are you ever gonna act on your instinct?” Jackie chuckled.

“What do you mean?”

“She likes you. And we all agree you’d make a cute couple. So hurry up and do it already.” Jackie grinned.

“Plus we’ve got a bet on with Aurora and Elijah who think she’ll act first.” Victoria smiled.

“I have a patient that needs an IV.” Danny said hiding his red face and embarrassment as he walked away.

“Nurse Cardinal is busy doctors why aren’t you?” Doctor Ethan Ramsey said walking up to the two ladies.

“You call it busy, I call it ‘making an excuse to avoid answering a relationship question’ Doctor Ramsey.” Victoria said.

“He doesn’t let it affect his work. Who’s the lucky lady?” Doctor Ramsey asked with a small smirk.

Victoria pointed to Danny who was chatting to Sienna. She was laughing at something he said.

“Called it from the beginning.” Ethan said.

“Since when are you aware of hospital relationships?” Jackie asked.

Ethan didn’t answer instead he shot Victoria a quick glance before excusing himself to check on a patient.

“Him as well? I thought Ramsey was married to the job.” Jackie huffed.

Victoria didn’t answer, she was busy watching Ethan walk away. “He’s clearly aware of hospital gossip.”

Jackie wasn’t listening at this point. She had her head in another chart when Bryce’s voice suddenly broke the silence.

“Alright what’s the big emergency I’m here?” Bryce winked.

“Possible gallstones in exam four scalpel jockey.” Jackie shoved a chart in his hands before wandering off to the vending machine.

“Damn what’s got her so twisted?” Bryce said sitting down.

“A patient discharging herself without her approval.” Victoria replied.

“Happens all the time. People get sick of staring out at Massachusetts. They’d rather be exploring it.”

“Doctor Clarke rescue 7’s coming in with two children, suspected chicken pox, eta 2 minutes.” Marlene turned to Victoria.

“Their parents called 911 on chicken pox?” Victoria asked.

“Apparently they’ve got a high temperature. Plus their parents say it looks more like pus boils rather than red marks.” Marlene replied.

“Okay page Dr Ramsey.” Victoria said.

“Right away Dr Clarke.”

Victoria headed out to the ambulance bay and waited for Ethan. The cold November air ripped through her and she folded her arms, trying to keep as warm as possible.

“What have we got?” Ethan asked.

“Two children suspected chicken pox.” Victoria said. When Ethan looked at her bewildered she continued “yeah I know but Marlene said the parents think it looks worse than it probably is.”

“Give them some cream and be done with it. There could’ve been a sick patient out there who didn’t get the ambulance they needed. Now we’ll have to deal with the body that rolls into Edenbrook when the patient was delayed necessary medical treatment.” Ethan rolled his eyes just as the ambulance parked up. Rafael Aveiro jumped out the drivers seat, a concerned look on his face.

“You took the chicken pox case?” Victoria asked.

“Two children, Nathan aged eight, Rosie aged six. Bad spots, high temperature. We don’t think it’s chicken pox.” Rafael said.

“What do you think it is?” Ethan asked.

“See for yourself.” Rafael said a grave look on his face as he opened the ambulance doors. Victoria and Ethan’s jaws dropped at what they saw.

Two children were bundled up in what looked like duvet covers. They had big white spots on their face, arms and legs. Rafael’s colleague Tamara also had a grave look on her face.

“Oh my god.” Victoria breathed.

“Is it what we think it is?” Tamara said.

“Yes, park up the ambulance and find an empty room even if it’s a trauma room. Victoria go grab those tubes from the lounge and bring them to exam five. And tell admin the protocol.” Ethan said picking the girl up.

Victoria ran back into the building trying to squeeze past as many people as possible. She burst through the doors of the lounge and searched for the white tubes that the hospital were sent every month. When she found what she was looking for she hurried out the room.

“What’s happening? Why was Ramsey rushing through here with Rafael and Tamara?” Jackie asked as all the other doctors and nurses looked at her for an answer.

“Lock the doors, don’t let anybody leave, move all stable patients out, close us to trauma and call the contacts in the emergency response book. And page Ines and Zaid.” Victoria said holding the tubes.

“Why what’s going on?” Bryce said.

“We’ve got two suspected cases of smallpox.”

— — — — — — — — — —

Donned in the necessary protection equipment, Victoria entered exam five where the two young children were sat with their parents. Both children were pale and wheezing, breathing in and out slowly.

“When did you first notice the spots?” Ethan was asking the parents. Victoria put oxygen masks on the young children.

“How are you both doing?” Victoria asked them.

“I feel really tired. And these spots are itchy.” The young girl spoke.

“Don’t worry we’re going to help you. I need you to keep these masks on ok?” Victoria said stroking her hair.

“Is this because we played outside with the other children?” Rosie asked.

“What do you mean?”

“We played football with the other kids in Kenya. They said they weren’t feeling well. Have we got what they got?”

“That’s what we’re going to try and find out. Ethan.” Victoria motioned Ethan away from the prying ears of the parents and the children.

“Four days ago the spots came up. Four days! And they waited until now to call 911. They should’ve brought them in themselves.” Ethan complained in hushed tones.

“Ethan they were in Africa. Kenya to be precise. They played outside with other kids who had symptoms. They’ve caught it off them.” Victoria said.

Ethan was silent. He looked at the children who were being comforted by their parents then ran a hand through his hair.

“Oh god ok uh, go and tell Rafael and Tamara. Get hold of their supervisor and tell them the rig needs to be scrubbed down. Are public health on their way?” Ethan said.

“Hopefully. I’ve paged Ines and Zaid. What about Naveen?” Victoria said.

“No. He’s not coming near here. Get someone to get ahold of him and tell him not to come in.”

Victoria entered trauma one where Rafael and Tamara were sitting on a gurney. “You guys are stuck here. It is suspected smallpox. Get your supervisor to decontaminate the rig.”

“It’s gonna be stuck there. We obviously can’t move it.” Rafael said.

“We’ve closed to trauma. Nobody’s coming in or out.” Victoria said putting protocol wristbands on Rafael and Tamara. “Did they say why they were in Africa?”

“Dad works for a wildlife conservation programme. It was either go with him or the children don’t see their dad for ten months.” Tamara sighed.

“Their breathing is shallow. There’s still a chance though.” Victoria said.

“This feels like…. like last time.” Rafael sighed.

“No Raf. Don’t think like that. We’ll fight it just like last time.” Victoria reassured him. She knew what he was thinking and she’d be lying if she said it didn’t cross her mind.

“Are they gonna be ok?” Tamara said.

“I hope so.” Victoria said. She walked out the trauma room and headed back to admin where everyone was sorting everything out.

“We’re closed to trauma. That was a fun conversation with Mass Kenmore.” Ines said.

“All the elevators are closed off. Doors are surrounded by the police department. No one gets in, no one gets out.” Elijah said.

“Look I don’t care where your administrator is we’ve got suspected smallpox cases here now get your asses down here otherwise we risk exposure to the city!” Zaid slammed the phone down on its hook.

“Public Health are on their way. They say to lock it down.” Ines said.

“The entire hospital?” Sienna said.

“The ER.”

“Are we 100% sure? Smallpox has been eradicated. There’s a vaccine for it. We haven’t had a case here since the 1940s. Are we not jumping the gun?” Zaid said staring at Victoria.

“Go and look at them in exam five. All the suspected signs and symptoms. This thing killed half of Europe. We can’t risk exposure to the city.” Victoria said.

“Looks like my gallstones operation will have to be put on hold.” Bryce said.

“Who’s gonna explain to them that they can’t leave?” Jackie nodded by the door.

Outside the police were standing blocking anyone from leaving or entering. Police strips were being put in place and people were anxiously looking between the door and the doctors.

“Where’s the tannoy? We had it here before.” Ines said looking between the shelves.

“Try the lounge.” Zaid replied.

“What are their symptoms?” Sienna said to Victoria.

“Fever, high temperature and white spots all over their arms, legs and face. It’s all there in black and white.”

“She’s right.” Danny replied obviously googling the said symptoms on the computer.

“Right well you’re gonna need our help. Bryce, Elijah you help Ines reassure the patients what’s going on and inform public health when they get here, find the other doctors and nurses on this floor and see if there’s any extra security to guard the entrance doors. Sienna, Jackie, Danny, Marlene they’re gonna need all the help they can get. We’ve got Rafael and Tamara to look after as well.” Zaid instructed.

“Where are the extra masks?” Sienna said.

“Try curtain one.” Zaid replied.

Everyone went into action but Victoria’s eyes were glued to the entrance doors. She could see people asking the officers what was going on, the crowd being pushed back further.

“Hey, we’ll solve it. We’re gonna be ok.” Bryce put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

“It, it just feels like last time.”

“I know it does. But you got through it and you’ll get through this.” Bryce said.

Despite her fears, Victoria knew he was right. There were two sick children counting on her to help them. The entire ER was preparing for a situation like no other. They were all in it together and no one was being left behind this time.

— — — — — — — — — —

Victoria watched the breathing of Nathan and Rosie. It was shallow but they were still alive, that was the main thing.

“We need a list of anyone you’ve come into contact with. Have they been to school or seen any friends since you got back?” Ethan asked the parents.

“They went to school a couple of days after we got back but they were off from last Wednesday with a cold. Then the spots appeared on Thursday. We thought it was chicken pox.” The dad answered.

“Any other family members or friends?” Ethan asked, Victoria could hear the agitation in his voice.

“Ross’s family came to visit the weekend we were back.” The mum answered.

“Do they live nearby?”

“No they flew in from Ohio.”

Victoria and Ethan shared a startled look. “You need to contact them and tell them to isolate as quickly as possible. Get them to contact the airline and tell them the flight number they flew on and also get in touch with anyone they might’ve come into contact with. Get them to tell people what’s going on and so on. ” Ethan said.

In the other room, Rafael and Tamara were having their temperatures taken and their blood pressure checked.

“Both BPs are fine your temperature’s a little high.” Danny said.

“Ok monitor them and check again in the next hour.” Sienna nodded.

“It’s become national. Family travelled in to visit from Ohio.” Victoria said opening the door from the next room.

“You’re kidding.” Rafael gasped.

“Go tell Ines.” Victoria said. Jackie nodded and hurried back to the admin desk. “How are you doing in here?”

“As good as can be. High temperature but normal BP.” Danny said. “What about the kids?”

“Shallow breathing at the most.” Victoria replied.

“I wonder how long we’ll be stuck in here.” Tamara wondered.

“We’ll all be together at least. Can’t die from boredom.” Rafael nudged her which made her laugh a little.

The sound of commotion from outside the room caused them all to turn their heads. They could see people arguing as Zaid and Ines tried to calm them down whilst explaining the situation. Ines reached for the tannoy and her voice rang out.

“You may have noticed we have security at all entrances and exits. There is a potential public health concern which is why for your own safety we are asking that no one enter or leave the building. We apologise for the inconvenience and we are working to try and get this solved as quickly as possible. But we need you to work with us. If we work together, we can get through this otherwise we could be stuck here for a long time.”

Ines’ words did not help calm down the crowd. The minute she finished speaking they started protesting and arguing. Victoria teared her gaze away from the window shaking her head. “I don’t blame their frustration. Little information doesn’t help.”

“We’re on the news.” Jackie said entering the room, wearing her protective equipment. “CNN are outside the hospital. Aurora is outside as well as Naveen. They’re talking to Harper who’s by the emergency door on the OR floor. He doesn’t have a clue what’s going on.”

“I thought someone called him and told him not to come in.” Victoria replied.

“We did but you know what Naveen’s like. This is his ER. He doesn’t want to be left in the dark.” Jackie said sighing.

“Victoria Nathan’s sats are dropping.” Ethan said from the other room. Victoria rushed in followed by Marlene and Jackie. “Take Rosie to trauma two, we need to work on him.” He instructed Marlene.

“Pulse ox is 82.” Jackie said looking at the machine.

“Go grab a paeds intubation kit.” Ethan said, Jackie hurried out the room.

“What’s happening?” The parents asked.

“Nathan’s not getting enough oxygen so we need to intubate him to help him breathe.” Ethan calmly explained.

“He has to be put on a machine?” Ross asked.

“If we don’t intubate him right now he’s going to die.” Ethan said. Victoria and Jackie looked at each other unsure if Ethan handled that well.

“Oh my god.” Imogen, the children’s parents gasped and headed to the door on instinct. Victoria understood why she wanted to get out there as soon as possible.

“Don’t leave the room! You’ve been exposed to a deadly airborne disease.” Victoria stopped her from walking out the door.

The three doctors worked on the young boy trying to get him stable before the lack of oxygen caused much further consequences. Jackie hung IV’s whilst Ethan slipped the tube down his throat. Once the tube was attached Victoria squeezed the bag trying to get as much oxygen back into Nathan as possible. A few seconds later, the beeping of the machine slowed down.

“Pulse ox is up to 95.” Jackie smiled.

“Nice work ladies.” Ethan smiled at the two younger doctors, his gaze lingering on Victoria. He moved out the way so Nathan’s parents could be closer to his bedside.

“I’ll go check on Rosie.” Jackie said leaving the room.

“Let’s check on the paramedics.” Victoria turned to Ethan.

Rafael and Tamara were lying on two separate beds, Sienna and Danny were sat on the floor.

“What is going on out there?” Ethan asked as he heard the commotion.

“People want to leave but they can’t. Tempers are flaring.” Sienna replied.

“They’re hungry too by the sounds of it. You know we’re on the news.” Rafael said.

“Of course we are.” Ethan sighed running his hands through his hair. These kids belong in the P.I.C.U., they’re both critically ill.”

“Doing that would mean exposing the rest of the hospital. Are you willing to take that risk?” Victoria looked up at him.

“Doctor Ramsey you know you can’t. There’s sick patients all around the hospital.” Tamara sat up.

“Go ask Naveen, he’ll know what to do.” Victoria reassured him. Looking as if he could kiss her, Ethan withheld himself and hurried out the room to call Naveen. Just as he left, June and Baz entered the room, covered in protection.

“Where do you need us?” June said.

“How did you get here? I thought you were upstairs.” Victoria asked.

“Word of advice. Never piss off an angry Brit.” Baz grinned looking at June.

“Yeah well we are a force to be reckoned with. Still, my words forced them to let us here otherwise I’d send information out to every British newsroom and explain how the US government withheld a potential health concern from the public.” June shrugged with a smirk.

“Nice one.” Victoria smiled. “The younger one’s in there. Her name’s Rosie and she’s six. Older brother had to be intubated after his oxygen levels dropped. Both are critical.”

“It is what everyone’s been saying isn’t it?” Baz asked.

“We think so. It doesn’t look like anything else.”

The two doctors nodded and headed into the next trauma room to see Rosie. Victoria looked out the window where Ethan was on the phone. He made eye contact with her and shook his head. This can’t be good. Victoria thought. She left the room and was met with ambush.

People began crowding round her but she was quickly pulled from the crowd by Ethan who had the megaphone. The surrounding doctors tried to calm down the people so Ethan wouldn’t have to use the megaphone but the people weren’t cooperating. Ethan’s voice suddenly ripped through the megaphone.

“Listen! We have two critically ill children with what looks like smallpox. Now most of you will probably have heard of it but have never seen it live and that’s because there hasn’t been any cases of smallpox in the United States since the 1940s-“ the rest of Ethan’s words were drowned out by the complaints from the crowd, most of them losing their temper at the fact that they allowed a deadly disease inside the hospital. Before Ethan could attempt to drown them out and finish what he was saying June had strolled out of the trauma room and taken the tannoy out of Ethan’s hands.

“The American’s tried to tell you now the Brit is going too. And this time you’re going to listen.” June glared at the crowd. The doctors and nurses around her looked shocked but impressed

“Who cares about the Brits?! There’s a reason we won the independence war!” Someone from the crowd cried.

“That was 300 years ago it’s the 21st century! There’s two young children who are very sick at the moment. We know you’re frustrated but spare a thought for the parents who don’t know if their children are going to survive. We’re not denying you your rights, this is about helping you. Now if you work with us, trust me, this will be over a lot quicker. Let’s work together so we can get through this.” June said.

The atmosphere had changed. People were mulling over June’s words. They didn’t know the ill patients were children. Suddenly it made things much more realistic. People retreated to their beds or the chairs in the waiting area much quieter than before.

“Damn June that was badass, remind me to never piss you off.” Elijah grinned.

“Where’d that come from anyway?” Bryce grinned.

“Never piss off the British. We are lethal.” June smirked as she retreated back to the trauma room to look after Rosie.

“How’s everything out here?” Ethan turned to his fellow colleagues.

“The crowd outside are getting restless. We’ve got critical patients outside as well who never got the call to say we were closed to trauma.” Zaid said.

“Why is Naveen outside? I thought he was told to stay at home.” Ethan said.

“You know what he’s like, he doesn’t want to be far from the action. He’s tried to come in several times but the officers have held him back.” Ines said looking at the crowd outside.

“Good. He’s vulnerable if he’s exposed to this.”

“Sam Palmieri from Public Health, we’ll take over from here.” A man in a white coat walked up to the doctors with a clipboard in his hand. “Where are the patients?”

“Exam five and trauma two, both critical.” Ethan said. The man then walked off in the direction of Nathan and Rosie. The phone then rang making everybody jump.

“ER? Dr Emery? Yes I know but we’re struggling down here too. We’ve got two- yes we were asked to do that take it up with public health if you don’t like it!” Ines put the phone down and put her head in her hands.

“What did Harper say?” Ethan asked.

“She wants to know why it’s 100 degrees up in recovery. Public health asked us to turn the air conditioning off so we don’t blow the germs around.”

“Well that explains why we’re all sweating.” Victoria sighed.

“Doctor Ramsey! Nathan’s siezing!” Sienna cried from down the hall. Victoria and Ethan sprinted back towards exam five, barely registering the sound of glass smashing as they hurried to Nathan’s side.

“What happened?” Ethan asked as he and Victoria put on the necessary protective equipment before rushing into the room.

“His sats have dropped and he started seizing.” Sienna explained.

“Give him two of Ativan quickly.” But the seizing was the least of their worries. The sound of the monitor averted their eyes.

“Lost a pulse.” Victoria said.

Sienna started on CPR as Ethan hurried to try and get as much oxygen into Nathan as possible. In the corner of the room. Imogen and Ross huddled together, their eyes rimmed red.

“Have you got the crash cart?” Ethan looked up at Sienna.

“It’s in trauma two.” Sienna looked at Victoria. Victoria nodded and hurried to the room to grab the necessary equipment. The seriousness of the situation was now escalating fast.

“Woah crash cart?” Baz said as Victoria wheeled the equipment.

“Yeah we’ve lost his pulse.” Victoria said trying not to let her voice betray her feelings.

“We’re in v-fib.” Ethan said. He charged the panels and they shocked the young boy.

“Nothing.” Sienna said, squeezing the oxygen bag.

Ethan did this multiple times before finally after what felt like hours, the monitor beeped at a regular pace. Victoria, Ethan and Sienna breathed a sigh of relief.

“We’ll have to watch him very closely now. Go be with the others, I’ll watch him.” Ethan smiled at the two younger doctors.

Victoria and Sienna retreated to trauma one where the others were. Everyone looked exhausted, still trying to come to terms with what was happening.

“They’ve broken the vending machines outside. Everyone’s hungry.” Danny said.

“Did you manage to get him back?” Rafael asked.

“Yeah but he could have brain damage. Seizure and a loss of pulse is never a good sign.” Sienna replied.

“You did what you had to do.” Rafael smiled. Before anyone could speak Ines dialled the phone outside the room and pressed a button that allowed her to talk to those inside the trauma room. Bryce, Elijah and Zaid were all with her, they all had grave faces.

“We have to evacuate. Public health have said this has gotten too out of hand, with it now being spread as far as Ohio, not to mention everyone here being exposed to it.” Ines said.

“Just the ER?” Victoria asked.

“The entire hospital.” Ines sighed.

Nobody spoke for a few minutes. This was now a drastic situation. What would happen to all the patients in other parts of the hospital?

“The children are going to be moved up to the P.I.C.U. we’ll evacuate everyone up there and then they’ll be taken up. Public health are prepared to take them so you can stay down here.” Zaid spoke this time.

“How long for?” Jackie asked. Everyone was avoiding asking how long they’d be stuck for even though they had a rough idea.

“Two weeks minimum.” Ines said.

“No, no no no no no. Minimum? What about maximum?” Victoria said.

“At least a month, it depends on when we can get the vaccine.” Zaid said.

The reality was beginning to sink in. Two young children, both critically ill with smallpox enter the ER, now the entire hospital has to be evacuated. It’s still unsure whether the kids are going to survive or not. Those who had treated the kids were now going to have to be quarantined. Which means they were all stuck downstairs. Two weeks wasn’t guaranteed.

How the hell were they going to get through this?

A/N: Hope you enjoyed chapter 1!

[cheseyre]

good news, sluts! my brain's no longer being completely stupid (only mostly), i've seen the new asides and...have some thought-y thot thoughts:

*deep inhale*

Okay, first things first: this art style is soooo fucking cUTE and I'm a jealous, squealing bitch. Anyone who knows who the artist is, could you link me to them, stat? I think Thomas mentioned them at the beginning of the ep, but nYeh, brain hurt, doesn't wanna do wooork-

Okay, I'll admit, I was a little...apprehensive when I first saw the thumbnail and title. Part of it's just me being a bitter Remus Stan, but also...okay, deep breaths, controversial opinion time, get ready:

I don't ship Prinxiety.

Like, at all. 

I can see the appeal, and these dorks were so very, VERY cute in this particular ep, but I was honestly turned off by the ship long ago due to how overwhelmingly popular it is and how some fans characterize these two and treat this relationship as if it's the only valid one, y'know, the works—slight tangent, but that's also why I don't ship Logicality or Remile. I honestly vibe much better with ships like Roceit or Analogical, y'know?

Cutting in for another brief tangent: I'm surprisingly okay with Demus/Dukeceit/Receit/Trashnoodle/Whatever-Their-Ship-Name-Is-Oh-God-Why-Do-They-Have-So-Many-Fucking-Names; maybe it's cause they haven't actually interacted in canon and the fan content gives me such good Gay Disney Villain content, idk man im weird—).

Still, their interactions were both hilarious and sweet and like I said, I see the appeal, it's just not my cup of tea. y'all Prinxiety fans got fucking FED and I'm happy for you nerds. Enjoy ze happy boys!

I guess another factor in my...low-key hesitance when I first saw what the ep was about is that...okay, get ready, another controversial opinion, le gasp: well, I'm not a big Virgil fan. In fact, at times, he swaps places with Patton as my least favorite sides—especially with some of his recent behavior in eps like DWIT (the "prohibit your breathing comment" really triggered me, for example). Sometimes, his attitude, especially around other sides like Roman or Janus, reminds me a little too much of my sister, who I don't have...a very good relationship with. Add to that how the more...intense side of the fandom has a disturbing tendency to turn him into the 'uwu precious woobie emo baby who can do no wrong' while unnecessarily villainizing other CERTAIN sides in the process, and...I think you all see where I'm going with this little rant 😅

However, upon actually watching the ep, he wasn't...that bad? I don't think? I enjoyed watching him be a flustered, disaster-y mess and genuinely excited at the end, his interactions with Roman were nice enough, and him literally pushing Thomas to make a move with Nico despite his obvious panic attack was a nice moment of genuine character development. I like seeing that, that's the good shit right there. And him being all flustered and shit, and smiling so much at the end of the vid was just...well, adorable. This man has no fucking right to be this cute, my god

alsoooo 

pURPLE EYESHADOW

PURPLE EYESHADOW HE LOOKS?? SO GOOD?? WTF?? SLAY EMO, SLAAAAAAAY FUCK, DOES THIS MEAN I HAVE TO CHANGE MY HALLOWEEN COSTUME NOW?

alsoooo 

hAPPY ROMAN

YESSSSS~ MAH BOI MAH SON MAH DUMB BITCH HIMBO PRINCE MAH EXTRA MESSY CINNAMON ROLL

ITS  BEEN SO  LONG

AND HIS LITTLE HEART EYES THROUGHOUT THE VID, OH MY GOD-

IMMA JUST IGNORE THAT "ADDING [MISTAKE] TO THE LIST" COMMENT I AM LOOKING AWAY I DO NOT SEE IT LALALALALA

THOMATHY, SIR, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT MAKING THESE TWO GAY IDIOTS SO BAEBY

Okay, but Virgil not realizing that "cyberstalking in real life" is literally just stalking is both a big ass mood and further proof that, yes, Logan is indeed the only one holding the braincell out of this disaster of a lot. God help them all if he ducks out in the next ep.

👀

And Thomas x Trash Can is my new OTP.  I dub thee ✨ "Trashmas" ✨

we sTAN TRASHMAS

Wait, does that mean Remus actually WAS in the ep? Cause, y'know, trash man?

hmmm

👀 👀 

Okay, okay. 

With how much Virgil and Roman were going off about Thomas constantly lying, I was (understandably) a tad bit disappointed my snek son didn't even make a fucking cameo, but y'know what? In hindsight, I'm okay with this it's fineee~

He was just off playing with shadow puppets and stealing money from us desperate, content-starved peasants with his sheer extra-ness and, honestly? Gotta respect the hustle. 

Get that precious, precious coin, dapper snake! Wring us poor losers dryyyy!

*evil snek laugh*

Also, this is a breather ep and adding Janus in probably would've caused unnecessary drama with the Roceit breakup and the constant antagonism between Virgil and him. It probably would've distracted from the point of the ep (flirting with social anxiety, exactly what it says in the tin)—much like it wasn't really Virgil or Remus's place to show up during POF. Does that make sense? I think it makes sense. Sorry, brain going brr-

Still, I can't believe the "Fuck Janus Sanders" Club is actually canon now 😂

God, first Patton in a skirt and now this. 

Thomas Sanders, you delight in fucking feEDING this gremlin nest of a fanbase, don’t you? You RELISH our screams of joy and pain and suffering, dON’T YOU?

What's next, actual canonical Janus and Remus interaction? Patton saying the fuck word? The Dragon Witch comes back? Janus's bowler hat gains sentience and takes over the world, Doris-style? What do you have planned, Thomas? Joan? WHAT ART THOU PLANNING, I MUST KNOW YOU HEATHENS YOU FIENDS-

And Virgil's little "would it be fair to him" comment, tho.

👀

Like, I get in the context of the ep, he was likely talking about Nico and how it wouldn’t be good for a potential relationship with Tomas to be founded on lies, but still...my anxceit heart aches, man. 

Gimme that sweet, sweet angst with a side of mutual regret and possible future reconciliation and maybe something more wink wink nudge nudge on top, pls

...and fries.

Honestly, tho, that entire bathroom monologue was fucking beautiful, man. And relatable, too—i can't tell you how many times I've talked to myself in public restrooms because I just didn't know how to get the words I wanted to say out. It's...kind of embarrassing, tbh

Speaking of embarrassing, uh, crying stall guy.

Just...

Crying Stall Guy

Like, I was expecting someone to come out the bathroom stall after Thomas stopped talking, but...I honestly wasn't expecting that. God, that whole scene was so cringe worthy and fucking hilarious

Honestly, Thomas in the ep in general was a huge ass mOOD and we collective gay/bi disasters ALL related with him, and if you say you don't, you're either lying to yourself or a demon. 

There is no in between 

sorry I don't make the rules

Like, I get this series is literally a gay disaster talking to himself for thirty minutes or longer, but like- EMPHASIS on the 'disaster' part 😂

Like...Thomas, you're lucky you're such a goddamn bean, because GOD, I cringing so hard when he first started talking to Nico

Although, I too have apologized profusely for genuine mistakes and am a flustered bi mess around my crush sooo

😅

And god, Roman's "thirty = old man" jokes made me feel old...and I literally just turned twenty, like, come on, man!

Maybe that's because I was literally watching this ep after finishing my ACT and had been sitting with a bunch of high schoolers, with their tiny fucking desks and tiny fucking water fountains smeh

*clears throat*

Anyways, uh, we STAN Nico Pintrovert Florés in this house

Like

He gives me such big Carlos from WTNV vibes for some reason and this makes me sooo happy

and YESS, he's a WRITER

And he's??? So sweet?? A pure bean?? Just sits on his laptop at the mall food court all day, like a god-fucking iCON?? A Nightmare Before Christmas fan?? weARS GLASSES??

my hEART

*cries*

The fandom seems torn between "Nicomas" and "Karrot Kings" as a ship name atm—personally speaking, I'm casting my vote for the latter

*crosses fingers* please dont be another janus x remus multiple ship name issue guys, please please please I can't keep track of them all-

*clears throat*

On that note, I'm guess I'm gonna go try and whoo over my crush with carrots now. If THIS disaster can do it and make it actually fucking work, god damnit, so cAN I

Meanwhile, in hell, my brain's just screaming "CANON LOVE INTEREST CANON LOVE INTEREST CANON LOVE INTEREST-"

God, I hope Nico isn't just a one-shot character, he's too pure and Thomas and him are adorable gay Disney fans and I stan

Oh, I wonder how the other sides'll react to him.

Wait.

Oh god.

Oh god.

This ep just unleashed a new fresh hell of potential Nico x Sides ships, hasn't it?

Welp, time to prepare for ze incoming flood of fanfics, I guess. I'll get my umbrella and rain boots.

That last shot of Virgil during the endcard was so fucking ominous oh my god mom im scared can you come pick me up-

Goddammit, Thomas and Joan, I'm NOT fucking ready to be traumatized again, fUCK

I wish I wasn't a broke ass university student so I could contribute to Thomas's gloriously extra Patreon—both so I can support my favorite content creators who make this amazing blessed content and also, to join my boi Janus in fucking  destroying society by giving money to the people who actually deserve it, fuck YOU GOVERNMENT-

Okay. 

Okay. 

New headcanon time as to why Patton, Remus, and Logan weren't in the ep: they were helping Jan film that Patreon promotional video. 

Like

Remus directed it, Logan helped with the lighting and script, and Patton was just there as the cheerleader. 

The reason Janus made a dog with shadow puppets wasn't just to flaunt his deity status and prove how he is truly above us mere wretched mortals 

despite that being the absolute truth and we all know it, don't lie to yourselves

No, it was really him trying to do something cute and silly for Patton, because Moceit rights, daMMIT

*inhales*

noww 

guys, gals, and nonbinary pals

it’s time forr

the most wonderful time of the yearrr

WAITING FOR THE NEXT EPISODE

Step right up, folks! Hear ye, hear ye, my prediction for the next episode: Prinxiety v. Moceit! With special guest stars: Karrot Kings vibing in adorable gay and Intrulogical, bitter at being excluded aGAIN

Who will win? Who will lose? 

here’s a hint: we all will because in this sick twisted game they are no winners only losers-

Place your bets, folks! ✨

Haha im not readyyy~

tl;dr

this episode has cleared my skin, watered my crops, and ended my suffering—an adorable calm before the... angsty fucking shitstorm that’s coming far too soon. Prinxiety stans, enjoy your food. Place an 'F' in the chat for me and my fellow grieving Remus stans. Trashmas is the true OTP, but Karrot Kings is cute too I guess. I've only had Nico Florés for 24 minutes, but if anything happens to him, I'll kill everyone in this room and then myself. Purple eyeshadow Virgil makes me question my sexuality aGAIN, and happy gay disney prince rights y'all. Say a big ole 'fuck you' to capitalism by giving your local dapper snake moneys. Concussion makes brain go brr and imma go buy some carrots and be gay now.

psst hey @quarantinevibes2020​ you wanna join me in being disaster-y? i’ll bring my best gay stare and you bring the wine

Until next time, my lovelies! ~ Ches 🖤

[everyone-has-their-story]

Season 3 episode 7 commentary with my sister:

So since this show is so different do they not do the bipolar storyline? Does Sander have a different a secret?

Episode 6 commentary

Oooo a Milan and Zoe night in? I wanna join 

Whatcha need Senne for?

Yikes, way to kill the mood Robbe

He’s sure, Jens is sure, I’m sure, we are all sure…(zoe asked if he’s sure it was Viktor)

He looked you up in the yellow pages

Yo Viktor you better hope you don’t see Senne

Ughhh Zoe! I see your communication skills with Senne haven’t improved

This is going to end greeeeat

Jens is finally caring and-- oh damnit not these dickheads

Whattt? Tell me what it is!

WHAT?! (mural)

HOLY SHITTTTTT!!! WHAT IN THE EVER LOVING FUCK!?

Moyo you are ruining this for me in so many ways!

Sander I said you could use my wall, but this works too!

Moyo fuck off

Oh yeah! Noor can do it, she didn’t but she could

His face is showing 100 different emotions right now

That look between Jens and Robbe is making me like Jens more these days..

I have read nothing that the boys are saying...I’m focused on Robbe’s face..

He looks so conflicted

Oh shit the close up! It's so good!! But also...LOL to that actor!!

Ofc they posted it on instagram..

Dude Senne YOU’VE had better days?? Try being Robbe..

Oooo secrets!

Sander’s lack of subtlety in his love for Robbe is admirable

Don’t act surprised..everyone needs your advice Milan

Go. Sit. Talk. 

I know I’m going to dislike this conversation, but I live for their talks

Noooo, it’s not your fault!!

Sorry Milan, but you don’t date someone for 6 months, meet a random dude and paint his face on a fucking wall if you just want him as your side piece

I get that it’s common, but not this situation

Sad Robbe making an appearance yet again

You have a visitor!

Nevermind..No visitors! We’re closed!!

Go. Away. Viktor!!

Sought help? Bitch please…

Bite me, Viktor...Senne use the knife

10/10 on this speech

DON’T LOOK AT HER!!

Nooooo sad Zoenne!

Why is this the saddest but happiest season?

Awww that’s a cute hug

Why are you texting Noor?

These boys need to stop fucking talking

Yes, Jens!! Yes!

Oh shit they really doing this

Again..the looks between Jens and Robbe are great

He said it!

Fuck you guys!!!!!

GROSS???? BITCH WHAT?

Yes Jens!!

Yes Robbe!

Noooooooo that is not what he needed!

Pause it! I should probably rewatch the scene, but I’ll do that later...I kinda got a different vibe from Aaron, like Moyo is a dick, but Aaron just kinda seems like a clueless dude who doesn’t know wtf to do. And I am seriously liking Jens more and more..why couldn’t he have been like this all season? You’re not listening to me, are you? *presses play*

I hope he is pretending that dartboard is Moyo’s face

Fuck them, Robbe!

Yes look at your new friends Robbe! Milan is great!

Aww he is a cutie, huh Milan?

Oh awesome more Zoenne fighting...I have a lot going on right now, so can y’all stop. Thanks, bye.

Milan and Robbe are like “ah the parents are fighting!”

Idk all the fighting might say otherwise, but you do you Zoe

Aw Zoe feels left out!

Tell her!!

Hahahah Milan! 

*laughs* Zoe!!! (Zoe thinking Milan and Robbe are a thing)

Milan feeling butthurt hahaha

Yes! Zoe and Robbe talking about Sander!

Wait what!! Nooo, open the door!! Rude...

Yasmina and Luca!! My girls!

Why is Aaron there?

Jfc Amber mind your business

I love Luca so much

Oh damn, Luca..

HE SAID YES!! I love that (when asked if he is gay)

Hahahaha Luca it’s okay girl, we get it

Awkward…

The other two were fucking assholes,that's what they were

The judgement on the girls’ faces at Aaron, same!

Oh sweet jesus Aaron stop talking…

Put the boy out of his misery...someone save him 

Slow down with your rainbows for a minute Luca

Also...wtf are they talking about? What website?

**air high fives** me too!

Ahhh shit moyo’s back…

No, don’t go over there!

I’m uncomfortable, anyone else uncomfortable?

Aaron what?! He literally JUST told you he was gay...wtf dude

Look at him being educated about pansexuals

Even Jens is impressed

Moyo... WHY?! WHYYY?! 

The mural!!

Wait..he CAN ride a skateboard!! Good to know

Jens your friendship score is improving

Sander your boyfriend score is decreasing

Your instagram..wish I could see it…**gives me a dirty look**

Yes, I do (jens asks if he still loves him)

Oh you were asking Robbe..

Ahh the ultimatum! Jens NOW you are the matchmaker! 

Idk if Robbe can handle any more pain

Yes, he does! You’re right Jens!

21:21!!!

Wait but he didn’t answer?

SANDER!!

I’m not sure which way this is going to go…

Sander use your words..come on!

Wow this song isn’t fucking with me at all

**slams the pause button** Did this bitch just drop the universe line with the 100%?? I know they use “100%” all the time on this show but this hits different...Smooth, Sander, so smooth. *presses play*

Oh thank god!

Oh shit...maybe move in-- nevermind y’all made it into the flat

The contrast between this time and with Noor...Robbe is like actually participating

Why does this make me emotional? Why am I like this?

Yes, shoes, important

**cackles** omg they are fucking adorable

Robbe! I didn’t know you had it in you!! (the iconic nipple lick)

Boy you really leveled up!

Damn this song is something else

His face here compared to with Noor..I can’t..

Holding hands? I’m fine..totally fine..

This is so well done, like literally everything about this is so well done

I’m sorry for repeating myself but they have great chemistry...other couples don’t compare..and there may have been very minimal speaking but I felt like they both said so much

Thank fucking christ we ended on a happy note!

[impulsivelycontentious]

No one reads this or connects it with my other online identities but since I've removed personals involvement from my other social media stuff, and I feel like bitching, I am jsut gonna go ahead and do it.

So I have brain damage. Yeaaaaars ago I threw up so hard I actually ripped open the inside of an artery in my neck, and it threw a clot, and that clot did some nasty shit on its way on through and out.

No doctor noticed for two weeks.

Everyone else did.

Good times.

Anyway.

So now I have a damaged brain. Brains don't grow back. Some areas can regenerate a few cells - notably the prefrontal lobe - but mostly brains fix themselves not by regenerating like skin does, but by rearranging the cells we have to fire to fancy new configurations.

This has been quite the ride. Because shit, it changes things.

I don't even know how much of my personality is consistent. No idea. Let alone everything else.

I have memory loss my nurologist won't akowledge because it falls short of dementia. That was the bar. "You don't have dementia, you know what year it is." Gee thanks there chief.

Anyway.

My brain wasn't too stable to begin with. I have always been prone to logic leaps that occur very quickly and not necessarily in ways other people would make them. My mind is jumbled and a little random and things collide all the time that probably shouldn't.

This has become much worse since the brain damage. See, my brain keeps wiring shit together. Shit it really shouldn't. It changes who I am, what I think, what I can think.

It's actually quite terrifying to realise you're a sack of geletine misfiring lighting at itself.

So anyway. To the point. Yes - I have one of those. Probably. It's somewhere in here.

Oh right, no, another detour. I'm autistic. "Oh yeah, they definatly didn't screen girls when I was a kid because how the fuck did they miss this otherwise" autistic.

Back to the point.

Recently I had this sensory processing ... Whatever the fuck that was. I call them.idssocistive episodes. I don't know how accurate that is. But my mind unhooks from my sensory data. Everything feels muted and unreal - sound, sight, touch, heat. Name it. It's wrong.

I hate these.

It gets particularly nasty because there are nurologicsl consequences. See, my concious mind ramps up it's interpretation of sensory data. It goes all in and leaves the rest of my existence stuffed in this tiny little box without enough space to do dick.

One effect of this is I suddenly become highly obsessive. I think it's a comfort mechanism, I require the same stimulus over and over again or to somehow mentally connect it to the same element. Of course, it could also jsut be that obsessive behaviour towards interests is part of who I am. I am autistic. I DEFIANTLY go all in when something fascinates me. But not... Not like this.

Do you have ANY IDEA how many times I watched starwars 8 in 72 hours? Any clue? Holy fricking ... Something. I watched it fast. I watched it slow. I watched it skipping ahead 10 seconds every 10 seconds. I dissected that thing in micrscopic detail.

It gets better. Because mere hours before I got hit with this episode... I was not a starwars fan.

Nope. I watched it. It was ok. I wasn't going out of my way for it.

And suddenly. Wham. Episode 8. All the time. I watched some 7 and 9 as well but it was like it was entierly because eit was connected to 8.

I cannot even.

And while this is happening, *I know*. I know. I really do. I know this isn't my normal behaviour. I know this isn't my wheelhouse. I know something is deeply, deeply wrong in my brain.

I think it might actually be an ok movie, honestly. But not THAT good. And now it's one of my favourite things. Forever. I have no idea if it's actually good. Did I not give eit a chance the first time? Is my obsessive brain simply emotionally hooked up how? Fuck, I don't know.

So that's why I'm posting today. On this day. May 4th.

I'm seeing a lot of star wars today and it's making my brain tickle with it's own ridiculousness.

Not the whole point though. Because it lasted 72 hours (I watched dit one more time after that and if wasn't near as intense).

But what happened AFTER my 72 hours as an obsessive raylo (oh yeah. I went there. I'm not even ashamed. I am also compeltely content with the end they got, because I do not see that shit working out).

Brains don't regrow. They rewire.

And suddenly, I'm drawing. Like... A lot. I filled pages of doodles. Sketches. I redrew a peice I'd been working on for about a month in a few hours and damnit, it was good. It's not professional quality but I'd never down anything that well before. This goes on for another day. And then I started a story, and I wrote 2000 words all at once.

I'm dyslexic. And words are severely impacted by my brain damage to the point it can cause me phsycial pain to force my thoughts in to words.

And here I am. Going nuts on my phone. The words just spilling out and again - damnit, it was good shit.

My brain was abstracting. Where the concious sort had been shunted, it wasn't directing the abstracting aspect of my mind.

And I was making cognative leaps. My brain was wiring itself together for creativity.

For another 24 hours.

And now, dear reader, we get to now.

I have written 200 words in the last 2 days. They feel wrong.

I started and stopped a dozen images. None of them feel right. And there are objective quality differences.

I can still draw a bit. If I'm not tired. I'm almost always tired - it's neural fatigue, it comes with surviving a brain damage.

I have somehow brain damaged my way in to better skills.

And it's... It's not a good feeling.

Doing it the first time and watching something take place in front of my eyes I don't recognise was like magic. It was euphoric. Amazing. Exciting.

Realising as time wears on that the ability to do this is intrinsically tied in to the way ones brain handles brain damage and sensory processing issues?

Not a great feeling cats. Not at all.

I find myself staring at a document willing words on tot he page that just aren't there anymore and feeling so frustrated I could scream.

Whose idea was this anyway? Why can't I keep my rewiring?

It's so hard dto explain the feeling of loss.

It's not me who did these things. A version of me, yes. But not the one we are keeping.

The one we keep struggles to hold a narrarive in her head and the narrator's tone took 3 rewritten to preserve for a single paragraph.

I don't want to stop. But how do I keep going? I'm not the author anymore and I've always struggled with adopting the tone of others.

So yeah. That's where I'm at. And I wanna talk about it. Because I don't want to be alone. But I can't escape the feeling I'm being dramatic. Terribly dramatic. And so talking about it is hard. How much is my own spin and perception and how much is real?

Did this really happen?

I think it did. But like every story I tell, I don't know. Memory loss. Cognetive issues.

I just wanna tell stories and draw. But the words hurt and the art makes me tired.

It's frustrating is all.

I hate being lighting geletine.

In case you're wondering what kind of cognative leap happened:

That one is april 4th.

And that one April 28th.

🤷‍♀️

Fucked if I know, really.

[just-another-author-i-guess]

Boiling rock:

Requested: yup

Warnings: she/her pronounced reader, more gross making out stuff

Pairing: Zuko x reader

A/N: I’m so sorry I haven’t been posting in a while, but I think I kinda killed my creativity or something. Tbh, I’ve just been sleeping a lot. Anyways, I’ll try to post some more from now on, now onto the story! Also, I don’t really remember the exact plot line of the episode, so I’ll just kinda make my own thing up. Anyways, in this you’re a water bender and you’re in the same prison as Suki (boiling rock), when Sokka and Zuko comes to rescue you, and Zuko instantly falls in love.

~

As soon as Zuko’s eyes locked on you, he froze. Never had someone captured his attention like you had, and the only thing he could do was stand with open mouth and wide eyes, as Sokka who came running down the hall, ran directly into him, not expecting him to stop all of sudden.

“Agh! Why are you stopping?” Sokka asked, annoyed, as he adjusted his fire nation helmet on his head.

“You’re going to get us caught, if you don’t start moving soon!” He pointed out, and started almost dragging Zuko in the direction he was previously going.

“Uh, w-who’s that?” Zuko asked, and stopped in his tracks once again, to point out the little window to the courtyard, where you and Suki were sitting.

Sokka squinted his eyes, looking closely out the small window in the direction Zuko was pointing, his eyes following yours and Suki’s move as you talked.

“Oh, her? Besides Suki? That’s (y/n), from the northern water tribe, they caught her and Suki, when they helped us escape,” he explained, and Zuko nodded slowly at every word, eyes still intensely focused on your form.

“You done staring? We got people to rescue,” Sokka said, as he quickly put his helmet back on and dragged the lovestruck prince down the hall.

~

All around you was chaos, people were running around, trying to destroy the prison, while the guards shot fire everywhere.

The word about a rescuing team coming to free you all, were out, which had surprisingly given the prisoners a whole new energy to fight with, and you were no different.

Standing alongside with Suki, your newly acquired best friend, you were doing the best you could at blocking out the guards fireballs, with water from the sea below you.

Blocking fire left and right, you were so consumed by keeping an eye on the prisoners, you didn’t notice a guard quickly approaching you, already readying his fire.

Only when you felt flames lick up your cheek, did you look up, and gasp. The man was standing only a meter or two away from you, and were ready to attack.

The fireball dancing in his hands, almost seemed to move in slow motion as the world around you stilled. You realized it was already too late, there was nothing you could do now.

A tear slit down your cheek, mixing with the burning wound on it, as you closed your eyes and braved yourself for the flames to consume you. But they never came.

When almost a minute had passed, you dared to open your eyes, and instantly met the eyes of your mysterious hero.

Quickly standing up form your crouching position, you brushed your clothes off and put a hand against your burning wound, which was beginning to hurt more and more.

“Are you okay?” The stranger breathed, and you noticed a slight redness and something that look like soot scattered across his nose, which made you laugh lightly.

“Yeah, thank you,” you said, a kind smile on your face, as you looked up into his golden eyes, and you immediately felt save.

“I-“ the stranger started, when suddenly you spotted Sokka in the distance.

“Zuko watch out!” He yelled, and instantly Zuko’s attention were on the ball of fire quickly approaching you, and without as much as a second thought, and wrapped his arms around your waist and threw you on the floor.

The fireball missed you, only by and inch, but you had other things on your mind.

Sokka had called the stranger Zuko, which could only mean one thing.

The one and only banished prince Zuko, had just saved your life, twice!

Your cheeks reddened, as you could feel his chest heaving quickly, into your back. He was so so close.

“You’re prince Zuko,” you panted, as he helped you up, and immediately looked down at you with a guilty look.

“I wish I wasn’t,” he awkwardly chuckled, praying that you wouldn’t turn your back on him, like so many others had done in the past.

You furrowed your eyebrows at his words, a look he found very endearing, as you spoke, “Why? I don’t care who you are, you just saved my life, twice! And, once Aang defeats your father, I’m sure you’ll be a great firelord!”

Zuko raised his eyebrows, surprised by your honesty, but let a little smile creep onto his face.

“Oh! I haven’t even presented myself yet! I’m (y/n), from the northern water tribe,” you spoke, and Zuko couldn’t help but widen his smile at your innocence.

“I know, Sokka already told me about you-“

“God damnit Zuko, stop flirting and watch out!” Sokka yelled, as he stormed over to you, and pushed you both down to the ground right as another ball of fire flew over your head.

Instinctively, Zuko wrapped his arms around you again, pulling you to his chest and bracing you from the fall.

The gesture certainly didn’t go unnoticed by you, as another thick blush covered your cheeks and you were once again thankful for the handsome prince you could now call your savior.

~

Later that night, you and Suki where safely back in team avatars camp, Katara tending to your wounds.

When she reached you, she gently put a hand on your scarred cheek. “I’m so sorry (y/n), but I don’t think I’ll be able to make this completely go away,” she said, her eyes filling with worry and sorrow as she spoke.

Your eyes saddened a bit, but you quickly covered it up with a comforting smile. “That’s okay, this will just be a new part of me,” you offered, and she gently squeezed your shoulder, as a layer of water wrapped around her hand.

“I can still try to make some of the pain go away, if you want?” Katara kindly asked, and you nodded gently as she began working her healing powers.

~

“Does it hurt?” Zuko quietly asked, as he bravely let his hand wander up your face to cup your burned cheek.

You flinched a little, but soon relaxed into the careful touch of the prince.

“A little,” you mumbled, and sadly looked down into his palm. “Katara says it’s gonna feel better soon,” you added, more to yourself than to him.

“I’m so sorry,” he mumbled, and stroked the burn gently with his thumb, as a quiet tear slid down your cheek.

“It’s fine,” you sighed, and angrily whiped the tear away, and looked up at him.

“At least we match now!” You giggled, and Zuko quietly admired your ability to turn even the saddest of situations happy and hopeful. A thought struck his mind, you were exactly what him and his people needed in a firequeen.

“What?” You asked and cocked your head to the side, and Zuko realized he had been staring at you.

“Nothing, nothing, you’re just perfect..” he mumbled the last part, and even though you heard it, you decided to tease him a little.

“I’m sorry, could you repeat that?” You grinned, and by the sheer look of cockiness on your face, Zuko could tell you were teasing.

“What about I show you instead?” He said, finally feeling confident enough to make the first move, as he quickly bend his head down and molded his lips to yours.

Instantly, you responded, and wrapped your arms around his neck, as you stood on your tiptoes and deepened the kiss, making a breathy groan escape from somewhere in the back of his neck.

You giggled, as he gently lifted your legs up, one by one, making you wrap your legs around waist, and tangle your fingers in the hair on his neck.

You practically clung to him like a koala, faces so close, your breaths was mixing, as he continued kissing you more needy by the second.

He wanted to prove to you, exactly how perfect he thought you were.

Forcefully, he pushed his tongue against your lips, as you playfully denied him, making him growl into the kiss.

With a breathy chuckle, he grasped your tights a little harder, making you slightly gasp, and he took his opportunity to slip his tongue inside, instantly meeting yours and in a battle you had no chance of winning.

You sighed, and licked at his tongue, as sinful wet noises escaped the two of you, and you wrapped your legs tighter around him, making your hips grind against his lower stomach.

Zuko whined breathily, sucking your tongue into his mouth one last time, before pulling away, resting his forehead against yours.

“We better stop while we can,” he panted, looking hazily into your eyes, and you giggled.

“Do you really wanna stop?” You giggled, and lifted yourself a little higher up in his embrace, so you could look down at him, as you kissed his forehead a little sloppily.

“No, but I think Toph would really appreciate it, if we continued this later,” Zuko cheekily pointed out, and you turned your head, to see Toph standing a few feet away, with a horrifying expression on her face.

Quickly, you unwrapped your legs from Zuko, as he carefully sat you down, and you wasted no time in hiding your face him his hard chest.

“Why didn’t you say that sooner?!” You cried out, cheeks burning up as you lightly hit him in the chest, feeling his chuckle vibrate through his chest.

~

Finally, the war was over, Aang had defeated Ozai, and everyone was cheering. Quickly, you glanced over at Zuko, as you all made your way out into the big balcony, so Zuko and Aang could speak to the crowd.

As Zuko and Aang started speaking, you spaced out a little, as you noticed how big the crowd was. You gently squeezed Zuko’s hand, as you gulped slightly, trying to get the nervousness out of your system.

Suddenly Zuko stopped his speech.

“O-oh, that reminds me-“ suddenly Zuko let go of your hand, and started to fiddle with something in his pocket.

“As the new firelord, it is my responsibility to find a firequeen, a-and I couldn’t have been more lucky to find the perfect one,” as he said those words, he turned to you, making your heart race as his golden eyes met your soft ones, giving you a breathtaking smile.

“And now, I can only hope that she wants to be my firequeen.” Then it finally registered, Zuko was asking you to be his queen, and your eyes filled with tears, as you threw your arms around him and buried your face in his neck, not able to do anything but gently nod into the crook of his neck.

The crowd erupted into yet another fit of cheers, as you engulfed yourself in Zuko’s red and golden ropes, smiling and crying not carrying wether his shirt got wet.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Zuko mumbled into your ear, gently smiling and burying his own face in your hair.

To be continued...?

[monstaless]

On The Low - Part Two

Author: @monstaless​

Relationships: fwb!Bambam x Reader, some JB x reader

Warnings: angst, smut, language, my possibly incorrect Korean (which I guess in the context of this fic is okay), some Vagabond spoilers (if you haven’t watched it yet, 10/10 highly recommend)

Song - On The Low by Justin Park

Word Count: 2.2k

A/N: I’m not sure how I feel about this. I hope you guys like it though! The third and final part will be finished and posted, hopefully, soon.

Part One | Part Two | Part Three

They were going on month two of their arrangement. Bambam had no complaints. She didn’t expect much from him. He didn’t have to text her everyday. He didn’t have to ask how her day had been. Although he still did both of those things fairly often as he would with any of his friends. They still had dinner together regularly and she still watched his cats if scheduling had him out of town. The sex was only getting better with time. He had no complaints at all. Not one.

He still hadn’t told anyone other than Yugyeom about it though. If he had plans, that was all he said. Just a simple “Sorry, guys, I’ve got plans this evening.” Though they all exchanged looks, none of them pushed for more information.

Yugyeom, of course, was curious about the situation and always had questions. Were they just secretly dating? What exactly were they if they weren’t dating? Were they exclusive? Was she seeing other people? Was he seeing anyone else? Did Bambam like her as more than a friend? Did she like Bambam as more than a friend?

He didn’t have all the answers though. He’d never done anything like this before. He wasn’t even sure that he understood the situation completely. It was like they were dating, but still in many ways it was completely different.

Bambam: Netflix and chill? I can supply dinner. Y/N: I don’t really feel that great. Bambam: Oh god! Are you contagious?  Bambam: Am I going to be next? How long have you been sick? Y/N: No haha It’s not that kind of sick. Bambam: Oh...do you need anything? Bambam: We can still Netflix and chill.  Bambam: I’m bringing you something sweet. Be there in 20.

He was on his way home anyway and didn’t mind stopping by the nearest Thai restaurant to grab her favorite treat. Especially, if it would make her feel even the slightest bit better.

She opened the door and stood behind it in sweats and a sweater that was way too big. His heart stopped for a moment. He was sure of that. He’d never seen her look so cute. He almost told her, but rethought it. Was this what he was missing out on most of the time? What would she look like in his sweaters?

“Sorry, I know I look terrible.” She must’ve mistaken his silence for disgust. She brushed a strand of hair that had come loose from her braid behind her ear and looked at the floor.

“No, you don’t,” he argued, holding the bag of food out to her in order to avoid having to say more. She took it and looked up at him before even checking the contents.

“Is this what I think it is?”

“I dunno. Depends on what you think it is.”

“Mango sticky rice?!”

“Yup,” he chuckled, feeling very proud of himself. “I thought it might help you feel a little better.”

“You’re the greatest!” She pulled him inside, closing the door behind him. “Wanna watch Vagabond with me?”

“You finished A Korean Odyssey without me, didn’t you?” he asked in disbelief. She gave him a sheepish grin over her shoulder.

“I couldn’t help it. You know how much I love Lee Seung-gi. He stole my heart,” she laughed. He did know how much she loved Lee Seung-gi. She swooned over him every time she saw him: TV, magazines, commercials. All of it. It was hard not to know how much she loved the actor. “Also, I couldn’t just stop there. The suspense was killing me. Do you want something to drink? I have hot tea.”

“Sure, I’ll take some.”

She ushered him to the sofa and he took a seat to wait for her return. She handed him a cup of tea and a fork for his container of sticky rice before sitting down next him. Then cocooned herself in her favorite fuzzy blanket and reached for the remote.

He shot her a look as she pressed play on Vagabond without starting it over. He looked at her in disbelief.

“You better start this whole series over for me, if you want me to watch it with you.” He made a face at her when she hesitated. “I’m not kidding. I’ll leave right now and take the sticky rice with me.”

She pouted, but went back to the episode selection to start it over. She scooted in closer to him so that she could lean against his shoulder. Then popped open the mango sticky rice and dug in.

“Oh my god! Why would you make me watch this? That poor kid!” He protested in horror as he swiped at his watering eyes. They were still only on episode one. She didn’t answer and he looked over to find her asleep, cuddled into his side like it was the most natural thing ever. His heart skipped a beat. He’d never seen her like this. She’d never fallen asleep during a show and she was rarely this cuddly. They’d never been in a position like this. He didn’t know what to do. He could wake her up, but then he’d lose this moment. He could let her sleep, but then she might miss something in the show and she’d be mad at him. 

He turned his attention back to the TV, but now he couldn’t refocus on it. Not with her snuggled up to him like this. He made his decision.

“Y/N?” he nudged her gently. Then repeated her name a second time. She opened her eyes and then, realizing where she was, sat up quickly. “Do you want me to go home so that you can get some sleep?”

“You don’t have to. Sorry that I fell asleep on you,” she murmured. “I’m just super tired. I think I’m okay now though.”

But Bambam wasn’t okay. The image of her sleeping peacefully on his shoulder was burned into his brain. A glimpse of what he could have if they were more. Something he could have every time he was home. This was one of the things he was missing out on. This was the difference, he realized.

She was hanging out with JB. She’d turned him down for JB. He tried not to feel betrayed. He knew that she and JB were friends and that they hung out regularly. He also knew that his request to hang out had been last minute and she’d been planning to hang out with JB for the past week. She’d told him a week ago about her plans and in his excitement, he’d forgotten. She’d even told him that he could join them.

He couldn’t occupy all of her time though and he had nothing to be jealous of. He’d agreed to this situation. Even if something happened between her and JB, he couldn’t actually get mad about it. He’d known all along that exclusivity wasn’t part of the deal. 

It just bothered him that it was JB. If it had been any other member, maybe he wouldn’t have felt so insecure, but he knew that she was into JB. She’d been into JB since the first time she met him. Everyone knew.

Y/N: Sorry that we couldn’t hang out today. Y/N: JB is about to leave. I can make it up to you when he leaves, if you want 😏 Bambam: You know that I’m not gonna turn down apology sex.

“Damnit, Bam. People are gonna ask,” she grumbled as she stood in the bathroom inspecting the mark he’d left on her skin. She shot him a look over her shoulder and he replied with a shrug.

“You can use makeup to cover it, you’ll be fine.” He hoped she wouldn’t though. He wanted JB to know that she was seeing someone. He didn’t know why he was suddenly so jealous of JB. Maybe it was because the other day, JB had asked him about her. JB’s curiosity was making him concerned that their arrangement might end soon. He knew that she liked JB. She didn’t try to hide it. She got all smiley when they were texting and if she was around him, she couldn’t keep her eyes off of him.

Lately, she had been spending almost as much time with JB as she spent with Bambam.

“What’s up with you? You’re weird today.” She pointed out as she sat next to him on the bed. Her annoyance about the mark had dissipated. She was genuinely concerned and he felt a pang of guilt for letting his jealousy get the better of him. “I’m sorry we couldn’t hang out earlier.”

“It’s not that. It’s just...work stress. I’m sorry,” he offered.

“You know you can talk to me about it, right?” 

“Of course. It’s just the usual stuff. I’ve got a lot of work to do. I should probably go.” He tugged on his T-shirt.

“Oh. Okay. Um, text me if you need anything,” she offered as she followed him to the door.

JB had seen the marks on her neck. He’d asked Bambam if she was seeing anyone and Bambam, still feeling guilty about being so jealous, fought the urge to lie. He told a half truth instead. That she was seeing someone, but he didn’t think that it was serious. When JB asked what he meant, Bambam explained that she and the man she was currently involved with were sleeping together, but that appeared to be the extent of their relationship. Jaebeom looked disgusted and Bambam felt a little bit of surprise that the truth had actually worked in his favor.

Until, JB spoke again and Bambam realized that it was actually quite the opposite. JB was disgusted that the man hadn’t committed to her. He didn’t understand why anyone wouldn’t want to call her theirs. Bambam pointed out that maybe she was the one who didn’t want anything more. JB made a face and stated that either way, the guy obviously wasn’t the one for her. Bambam decided to drop it before JB unknowingly insulted him more.

“You know that you don’t have to go home, right? You can stay here,” he offered as she started to get out of the bed. She laughed.

“Bam, I literally live an elevator ride away. It’s not that big of a deal.”

“I know. I just figured I’d offer. It’s pretty chilly tonight.”

She raised her eyebrows at him. “My heating system works, you know?”

“Why are we still doing this? Why don’t we just make it official? I know you said that you didn’t want something serious, but this isn’t that different. I can give you whatever you want.”

“I just am not interested in being tied down right now. This works for me.”

“You like Jaebeom-hyung, don’t you?” he questioned, immediately regretting his childish outburst, hating how rude he’d sounded. She looked at him in surprise. It was too late to take it back now though. He might as well get his answers.  It had been gnawing at him for weeks. He adjusted his tone this time though. “Why don’t you date him? It seems like he likes you. You hang out all the time. Why do you keep coming to me?”

“Really? This has nothing to do with Jaebeom. You’re an idol, Bambam! You know what that means. Why would I want to date an idol, Bam? Why would I want to hide my relationship from the whole world? Why would I choose to date someone that I can’t be seen in public with? Why would I date someone who can’t marry me or have children with me because it means putting their job on the line? You said when you started this that you didn’t want anything serious!”

“Why didn’t you go for him first? Why did you choose me?”

“I just told you that this has nothing to do with Jaebeom. You made the first move, Bam. I told you the first time that I didn’t want anything serious and you said you were okay with that. You said that you didn’t want anything serious either.”

“That was before I knew how much I really liked you.”

“I don’t think that we should keep doing this.” She took a deep breath and shimmied into her dress. “I need to go home.”

“Y/N. Wait!” He tried to follow her, but by the time he’d gotten his jeans pulled on and made his way to the door, the elevator doors were already closing. “Fuck!”

He slammed the door and pressed his back against it. He was torn between trying to talk to her and just letting it go completely. He should’ve just kept his mouth shut. Who knew if she’d ever talk to him again.

Bambam was surprised to see JB in the parking garage of his building. JB explained that he was there to see Y/N. They hadn’t hung out in a while and she’d been pretty quiet for the past week. He was quiet for a moment before asking Bambam if something had happened between her and the guy that she had been seeing. Bambam shrugged and admitted that he hadn’t spoken to her recently, but he hadn’t seen her with the guy. He skipped the part where it was because he was the guy and they’d been avoiding each other.

“Geunyoneun manggo chapssareul joahamnida,” he offered as the elevator doors opened.It was his way of apologizing to her. He knew that she didn’t want to see him. She would’ve said something if she did. Instead, it had been radio silence. “Geugosi geunyoreul giun nage hal gosimnida.”

He didn’t wait to see if JB got on the elevator or not. He was pretty sure that he’d lost her for good either way. He would’ve settled for just staying friends, but he’d lost his temper and now he’d lost his best friend.

He couldn’t sleep.

When he’d returned home, JB’s car had still been in the parking garage. His mind couldn’t stop playing through the possibilities. Had she changed her mind? Was she taking a chance on JB? Or had JB just taken his place? He couldn’t believe that he’d let it go this far. He’d known that she had a thing for JB. She and JB had hit it off from the start. He’d gone into their arrangement knowing that eventually it would come to an end. He’d known that it would never be more than just sex. He’d agreed to that arrangement. How had he convinced himself that it might ever be something more?

He had never had the right to be jealous. Especially not now. They were done. She was free to see JB if she wanted. She’d always been free to see JB if she wanted.

[berri-hopefulspouse]

-- Moonstone --

Fandom & Characters: Danganronpa, Emotionally Hopeful [Makoto X Ren], Kyoko Kirigiri, Aoi Asahina [Mentioned], Yasuhiro Hagakure [Mentioned]

TW: Suggestive Themes [Mostly implied], Flashbacks, Hallucinations, PTSD, guns, injury, 

Word Count: 9.9k words

Summary: It’s been over three years since the events of the original Killing Game...and Makoto has to ask himself; is he ready to take that next step with his partner?...And if so; can he set up the perfect date for them?

AN: This is one I’ve started to write since like...early November. Thanks Executive Dysfunction. Anyway, big story time!!! ;w; This took wayyy too long but I hope yall enjoy it! <3

The rain had always found a way to calm them down. 

It was something they had known for a long time, even with their memories getting erased. Something about the somewhat gloomy atmosphere, the sound of the rain tapping gently against the windows… It stopped their thoughts, at least for a short time. 

It was why, at the time, Ren had been sitting by one of the windows of their apartment, head rested on the windowsill and watching the sky- a softer shade of pinkish gray- swirl as the shower lightly tapped at the windows. For the first time in a while, their thoughts were quiet, just focused on the little patters outside. Part of them wanted to stand outside, take in the rain...but well, not like it was particularly safe. With so much pollution in the air, it made for really bad acid rain episodes. Without some form of protection, it could get someone really sick. And it HAS gotten them sick, numerous times.

...So maybe that wasn’t the smartest idea. Sitting by the window and letting the lack of thoughts bring them peace of mind was enough for them, anyway.

Sitting up a bit, trying not to doze off at the windowsill, they stretch their arms over their head with a drowsy little yawn, tossing dark brown locks out of their face. It had been a long while since they dyed their hair- hell, it had been a while since they even cut it...maybe they should contact Asahina about helping with their hair later that day.

What interrupted that train of thought, though, was the sound of the door behind them closing- getting a smile out of them.

“Koto!” They got up from their chair, headed over to meet their boyfriend at the door- messy brown locks falling into their eyes as they peered around the corner- earning a little laugh from him.

“Well, hey!” Seemingly surprised at their energy, Makoto barely had time to take off his work jacket before feeling their arms wrap around his torso. Chuckling some more, he ruffled their hair a bit before returning the gesture.

“Welcome back...Did everything go well today?” Their tone was quiet, yet sweet- it was the one side of them no one else really got to see but him. He was thankful for that much, and he nodded quietly.

“Yeah, the plans are going well...Everything’s going according to schedule, and if we’re lucky- the school will be open again in another year or so.” Makoto responded, brushing back their curls to lightly kiss their forehead with a smile, “I still can’t believe you of all people talked me into doing this.”

Sticking out their tongue, they pout a bit.

“What’s that supposed to mean?!”

Dropping the topic with a light little snicker, the two went further inside- Ren returning back to their little spot by the window, and Makoto headed to grab a coffee from the little kitchenette area. For a couple minutes, there was quiet- the rain and the sound of coffee brewing being the only noises that went through the apartment. Soon enough, though, Makoto walked back over and leaned over their shoulder- watching the rain outside for a moment before raising an eyebrow.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

“Hm?” Looking over their shoulder to him, they flustered a bit before quickly looking away again with a slight pout, “N-Nothing, jeez. For once, it’s...quiet.”

“Really? Huh.” Makoto gave a bit of a smile at that, arms wrapping over their shoulders- a mug gripped in his right hand, “Is it the medication?”

“No,” They shook their head, leaning back into his touch with a soft sigh, “It’s just the rain…”

“Is that why you like rainy days so much?” He asked, out of curiosity, and they nodded quietly. For another few moments, there was quiet- occasionally Makoto taking small sips from his coffee mug and Ren just staring off out the window, lost in the silence and their partner’s arms.

“Things finally seem to be calming down, huh?” They asked, after a couple minutes, “The biggest threats have been dealt with, the world’s...starting to rebuild itself. Big-stakes missions are finally slowing down...it’s finally almost over.” 

Makoto didn’t really think much about it before, until they had pointed it out- but it was true. It had been almost 3 years since the events of the first Killing Game had taken place, and for the most part since then the two had been working at Future Foundation up until the last 6 months or so. While they were still working closely with them, it was Ren who had brought up the idea of setting their sights elsewhere. The idea of rebuilding what made Hopes Peak what it was...run it better than the past… it was all on them. Of course, though, Makoto was the one who was mostly overseeing the construction of it all. 

It was really all starting to calm down. 

“It really is, isn’t it…?” He remarked with slightly widened eyes, “This war we’ve fought...everything we’ve been through… it’s almost over.”

Nodding to themselves, they quietly take the cup out of Makoto’s hand and take a joking little sip from the coffee, watching the boy pout before he quietly snatched it back.

“You don’t even like the coffee I drink!” He exclaimed in a faux offense, watching the brunette burst into a tiny fit of giggles and lean further back into him with a little smile. 

“I don’t,” They agreed, before that smile turned into a mischievous little smirk, “But I do like taking things you own.”

“Clearly,” Makoto gestured to the fact that, at the time, all they had on was his hoodie. Ever since he started working at Future Foundation, they basically had claimed it as their own. “Am I ever going to get that back?”

“Nope.” They joked, that impish grin on their face only widening, “It’s cozy and reminds me of you.”

…If that didn’t make Makoto’s face go from zero to a hundred in the fraction of a second. Trying to hide his flustered face into the rim of his cup, he huffed a bit. Of course, he didn’t mind that they wore his jacket- in fact he found it endearing. But god damnit all- if the little things they said to him sometimes sent his mind for an absolute tailspin…

Still, as he watched them from the corner of his eyes- still hiding his face into his mug- he realized something...or rather, remembered something. 

‘When all of this is over...when I don’t have to fear for our lives whenever we leave the apartment anymore... I want to be yours. I want to be only yours, and I want to marry you one day. I...is that okay?’ 

‘...O-of course… I’d love that.’ 

That was a promise made almost a year and a half ago. That was a promise they made to him... something he didn’t even think about at the time- given the circumstances of everything going on around him. And just like then- he didn’t even realize that everything was just about over. He didn’t realize until they had pointed it out earlier…

...He wanted to be the one to make a move. He wanted to give back to them, the same way they have poured everything they had to him. They had always been the one to remember anniversaries, birthdays, all of that...and sometimes Makoto was left scrambling to make sure he did something they’d appreciate.

He wouldn’t mess this up.

However, he was drawn back out of his thoughts with a quiet little yawn, blinking for a moment before looking down to Ren in mild surprise for a moment, before managing to speak.

“You look tired...wanna lay down and get some rest?” He already knew their answer, but it never hurt to ask.

Sure enough, they shook their head and tried leaning closer to him, “I’m...I’m alright…”

Quirking a teasing eyebrow, he gave a little smile, “You sure about that?”

“Mmmhm…” The rain seemed to calm them down enough to be drowsy, they could hardly keep their eyes open. Makoto laughed to himself, ruffling their hair a bit more and setting the now empty cup of coffee aside.

“You wouldn’t even come to bed for snuggles?” He teased lightly, trying to do a slight pout but instead having a look akin to a cheeky smile- of trying to hide his laughter- rather than a pout. He knew already any form of affection would easily persuade them, so it was always a bit fun to tease them a bit. 

And, like a lost little cat, they whimpered and nuzzled into his hand.

“...Fine.”

Chuckling to himself in a silent victory- all while trying to still hide his internal laughter- he helped them to their feet to get them to at least go lay down. It took a few moments- some shambling steps and Ren practically yanking off the buttoned up shirt Makoto had on, as well as the work tie. He chuckled nervously to himself- no matter how many times they reassured him...he was always a bit shy about how he looked to them. But when they sat at the edge of the bed, they gently yanked the speckled brunette into their lap, causing him to squeak.

Not unusual. Still always surprising, though, at least to Makoto.

Still, with his back to them, he felt sleepy hands trace over his stomach with a drowsy, but amused little hum.

“I love you, you know that right?”

“Uhm...y-yeah,” He was trying his best to sound as confident as he could without physically squeaking, “I love you too…”

Gentle fingertips grazed over his skin, and he felt their mouth gently press small kisses along his shoulder.

“You’re so...pretty...too pretty f’r someone like me.” They mumbled quietly into his back. If it wasn’t for the fact they were being way too adorable for their own goddamn good, he’d probably chuckle at the fact that they couldn’t even reach his shoulderblades due to their height. 

“You know that’s not true…” He mumbled, quickly adjusting the way he was sitting before their little hand movements sparked too much in him, instead turning to- unintentionally- straddle them, “You’re gorgeous too, you know.”

“Mmm,” As he cupped their cheek, gently, they leaned into the gesture, “You say that a lot for someone who beats himself up.”

“Look who’s talking,” He remarked somewhat bluntly, though managed to quirk a smile a moment later, “You know I mean it everytime I say it, Mx. Living Lie Detector.”

He felt them pout into his palm, sleepy brown eyes darting up to his with a look of flustered annoyance.

“Shhhhtt…” They shushed him, the sound muffled a bit into his skin, causing him to laugh.

“I’m right.”

“Shhhhh…” He tried to hide his laughter more, tilting their chin up and leaning in to give them a few kisses- however only resulting in the two falling back into the mattress in a fit of small giggles and muffled mumbles.

It took a bit of banter back and forth, but eventually, the two had settled into bed- Ren nestled into Makoto like the puzzle piece he had missed his entire life. They were starting to doze off, occasionally stirring enough to nuzzle towards him- or move slightly. Being a restless sleeper with insomnia, it often took a bit to get them to sleep- no matter how tired they were. Restlessness was prominent, and half of the time Makoto stirred awake in the middle of the night to see that Ren was almost going to fall off the one side of the bed from moving around so much in their sleep. Still, with one arm wrapped loosely around them, the other toyed with their hair, at least calming the restlessness down. Slowly, but surely, they settled back down, curling in a bit on themselves. He hummed softly, feeling them start to further relax and sink into the mattress. They hummed along to the mindless song with him, listening to them grow quieter...until they were silent.

Once he knew they were about out, he felt the drowsiness of work seep its way in, and with a mumbled little ‘I love you,’ into their ear- he let himself drift off to sleep as well...dead set on coming up with a plan.

»»————-　★　————-«��

The following afternoon, Makoto had headed out on one of his off-days...Of course, he usually did spend his off-days with Ren, since it was rare in-and-of itself for the two to have a day to themselves. It was rare to get a break, up until recently. Most of Makoto’s work these days was just file work, planning, and hiring other construction workers. So, it left for many off-days, usually only working on a Monday, Wednesday, Friday schedule. That day though, Ren was with some of the others- getting their hair trimmed up and re-done. Despite none of them ever really cutting anyones hair before, Ren only seemed to trust their fellow survivors. Made enough sense, with how the last three years have gone- it often seemed like they always were up against someone else. All the same, it was good for him- he had to make some sort’ve plans...and the only person he trusted enough to help was…

“Naegi?” The voice behind him jostled him from his thoughts, causing Makoto to turn around and smile towards her.

“Hey, Kiri!” He waved, although it definitely seemed a bit more lethargic than usual. He turned back to look outside… he was leaned up against one of the rails- one that overlooked the sea. It felt like forever ago he was looking out from here when dealing with the remnants- paranoid to the bone of being spotted. Kyoko slipped in beside him, gently gripping the rail before speaking up again.

“It’s been awhile...how have things been for you two?” She asked,  casting a look through soft violet eyes. Makoto smiles a bit, and exchanges a look in turn.

“It’s been going well. Of course, there’s still moments where it doesn’t seem like it’ll ever be okay again but...we’re both managing,” He responds with, “But things do seem to finally be calming down.”

“Tell me about it. I’m actually able to start focusing on things other than dealing with the after-effects of Enoshima’s crimes.” Kyoko mumbled with a sour little huff, “It’s almost shocking, really.”

“Seems like just yesterday we were waking up in Hopes Peak, huh?” He asked, watching his best friend nod beside him.

“It really does…” She trailed off for a moment, before glancing beside her and giving a slight smirk, “So, are you going to explain why you invited me over here in particular, or are we just going to do idle-talk for a good hour or two?”

Laughing to himself, he rubbed the back of his neck, “That obvious, huh?”

“Normally if you just wanted to hang out, you’d invite Ren with you. So I can only assume this is of the utmost importance, or…” She glances out of the corner of her eyes once more, “This is something about them.”

“Got me there, but its uh...it’s a bit of both.” Makoto mumbled shyly, feeling flustered even at the idea of explaining it. 

Kyoko remained quiet, giving a small gesture of her hand to explain what he meant by that statement, and he sighed, looking out towards the ocean in thought. 

“...Back before that whole...thing...with Future Foundation happened, during when we were dealing with the Remnants… Ren and I shared a promise,” He rubbed at his promise ring in nervous thought, gently twirling the ring in his hands, “Once everything had settled down...once we weren’t at a constant risk of losing our lives...we’d get engaged. That was almost two years ago, and...well, all the loose ends have mostly been...at least, managed.” 

“So you want to finally seal the deal, hm?”

“That’s putting it lightly but...yeah. I want to propose but I...I want it to be special. I want to just give a shred of what they deserve... I mean, the rest of their life from what they told me has been such a mess...I just want to make sure one part of their life isn’t as messy, if that makes sense?” Makoto explained, rubbing the back of his neck, “Especially considering I mean...they deserve so much. After everything they’ve been through, they deserve so much love and care...and I want to give them that.”

Kyoko listened intently as Makoto rambled, before giving a quiet smile, “I’m guessing you have no clue what to exactly do?”

“...” He shot her a look, clearly embarrassed as his face flushed red, “You didn’t need to say it so bluntly!”

Laughing to herself, she shook her head, “It’s alright Makoto. While I don’t quite know Ren as well as you do, they do confide in me often enough for me to understand why you’d choose me out of anyone else.”

The brunette gave a soft nod, nervously tapping his finger idly against the rail as he looks down, “I just don’t want to mess this up for them, you know?”

“I think you’re worrying too much,” She responded, raising an eyebrow, “They’d appreciate any sort’ve gesture you give them, putting their past into perspective.”

“Yeah, but this is different, Kyoko! This isn’t just like an anniversary, or like a date, or anything of the sort! This is going to be a proposal!” He exclaimed, a hint of frustration in his voice as he ran a hand over his face. 

“No need to be so crabby, Naegi. I’m just saying what you already know.” 

SIghing to himself, he relaxed a bit, “I know, sorry… I just don’t want this going wrong. Like so many things for the last few years, I don’t want this going wrong.” 

Kyoko remained quiet for a moment, almost awkwardly so. She never was one to handle social situations the best...all the same, she remained composed, not showing her anxiety before speaking up again.

“Well, what’s something they’ve wanted to do that you two haven’t gotten to do yet?” She asked, “Something that they’ve really wanted to do?”

Makoto remained in a quiet thought for a little while, watching as Kirigiri turned and leaned back against the rail instead. 

“Hmm...I think I have a good idea.” Makoto eventually resolved, turning to Kirigiri, “Can I run this over with you real quick to make sure it’s a good idea?”

“Hmm. Of course.” She smiled a bit. Even after all this time, he still respected the opinion of others- but he no longer let it shake his confidence. 

Still, as she listened to the idea he had in mind, she raised her eyebrows in surprise. Not only did he really think this through quite quickly, but it sounded genuinely sweet... Not to mention, likely something they would both enjoy. She found her face flushing a bit to herself, remembering her brief little crush on the luckster during her time at Hopes Peak. 

Kyoko did snap out of it, however, when he chuckled to himself and rubbed the back of his neck, “How does that sound?” 

“That...sounds like it’d probably work…” She mumbled, underexaggerating her opinion through her teeth. Jealous? A bit. They were so, so lucky they had him…

“You really think so?” The way his eyes lit up when she confirmed this however, made her settle back down. 

“Yes...they’ll love it, if all goes well.” She further assured him, causing Makoto to hug Kyoko tightly with an excited grin, “Thanks Kirigiri! You’re amazing!!” 

Surprised for a moment, Kyoko wasn’t sure how to react, before slowly- but gently- hugging the luckster in return, “Of course. You two mean...a lot to me. Anything to help, I’ll be there.”

That genuine little comment made Makoto just smile all the wider, giving another gentle squeeze before letting her go, “Anyway, that being said, how about we go get coffee before Ren’s done with their little ‘hair appointment’ with Hina and Yasuhiro?” 

“Sure, as long as you’re paying,” She teased lightly, earning Makoto gently elbowing her in the side. It, at the very least, lightened the mood and got the two to laugh- before heading off for their little outing before it got any later. 

»»————-　★　————-««

Meticulous planning, patience, and praying to whatever god might be listening that his bad luck didn’t get in the way again. That’s what the next few days looked like, between doing his own bits of research and calming his own pure anxiety. Between looking around for just the right ring- with Togami’s help- and picking out something that looks nice.

All he had to do was ask them out. No big deal. No big deal. Right?

Still, the more he thought about it...the more nervous he felt. 

All the same, he knew he did have to ask...so, he did, when they were getting ready for bed. 

Ren was in the middle of idly scrolling through their phone, eyes heavy from drowsiness. It must’ve been late, Makoto hadn’t really noticed it. He had just finished setting things up with Togami for the following afternoon, and leaning back in his chair, he sighed with a little huff before looking over to Ren over the side of his chair, head lolled slightly to the side.

They looked surprisingly so calm. They had their headphones on, quietly humming to a song on their phone and staring quietly at the screen. Occasionally, they’d smile a bit, or laugh, but it always fell back to that quiet little look. Soft, entranced, relaxed. A look he came to love, because it usually was one of calmness- which was the stark contrast from the hyper & anxious persona they usually had up with everyone else. 

Getting up from his work space, he meandered over to Ren, practically collapsing on top of their form- somewhat tired from all the work he had to put in the last few days. It definitely was nothing compared to some missions he went on, but the anxiety alone of it all had definitely taken a toll on his energy.

They looked up on that note, sleepy eyes meeting his own endearing ones. It was all he could do to keep from kissing them then and there… 

…Actually, fuck it.

Giving a cheeky little grin to himself, he scooted a bit further up to gently kiss his partner, who gave a soft little hum of acknowledgement as they gently pressed towards him. When he did draw back, they rose an eyebrow, sliding off their headphones to greet their freckled partner.

“Hey.”

“Hey!” He couldn’t help but smiling...they meant so much to him, and seeing them so calm at least calmed him down, in some aspect.

“Whatcha doin there, luckster?” They gently teased, gesturing to the fact that he was laying on their chest. He only grinned, nestling a bit further into their chest which got them to laugh.

“Not moving?”

“Mmm...No.” He responded, closing his eyes and focusing just on the warmth of their skin against his cheek. Listening to their heartbeat, he felt a bit more at ease. He hummed softly, trying not to fall asleep like that before looking to them.

“Hey, Ren?”

“Hmmm?”

“Mind if I get you up early tomorrow?” He felt it’d be wiser to play it casual, rather than make a big display of it- lest they catch on to his plans- “I wanna take you somewhere, just the two of us.”

“Oh, really?” Curiosity found its way into their tone, “Sure, darling...that sounds really-” A yawn interrupted them, sleepiness slipping into their voice, “-really….nice.” 

“Yeah...I figured it’s been a while since we had a proper date, you know? Between work and everything, I figured a little date out would do us good.” He mumbled, looking up a bit to give them another kiss. They leaned into the embrace, another low hum of contentment thrumming through their throat as their hands gently snuck under his t-shirt, and over his back. It gave the luckster a soft shudder, melting into the feeling. When he finally drew back- after realizing the slightly swimmy feeling in his head was from, in fact, the lack of oxygen- the two were breathless. For a few moments, there was quiet- aside from them catching their breath, before Ren mumbled- almost shyly.

“I wish oxygen was not a thing necessary.” 

It got a cheeky little laugh out of Makoto, who silently wrapped his arms around their neck- hands curled into their curly hair, “If you want me to kiss you more, you know you can just say so.”

“Hmm, should I get some sleep, or do I wanna be awake for a few more hours,” Ren replied, tilting their head with a faux contemplative look on their face. Makoto could only chuckle for a brief moment before they gently pulled his chin to them, a curl of a grin on their face as their mouth met his.

“I can sleep on the ride there,” They mumbled softly into his lips for the brief moment they pulled away, before sitting up to properly embrace him. 

»»————-　★　————-««

The following morning, after nearly dragging Ren to get up at a time more reasonable than noon, he was practically fidgeting on the spot trying to get them ready to go for the day. While Ren was in the shower, getting cleaned up and ready, Makoto simply couldn't help but pace in thought. He couldn’t…mess this up. 

Would they even want this now…? 

No, he couldn’t...shouldn’t...doubt himself over this. He knew already what he wanted- as much as he knew months ago. Years ago, at this point. 

He sighed, fidgeting with his hands, twirling the promise ring back and forth...Unsure of what to do while he waited. He had freshened up not too long before Ren did- though he didn’t let them see how he looked, taking their glasses before practically shoving them into the bathroom in a fit of chuckling from the two.

Still, he felt...nervous. Sure, he dressed a bit formally for their previous anniversaries and such- but this was much different than that.

It wasn’t even that he was nervous of their response- they had shown many times in the past that he’s the only one they have eyes for- but… rather, he was nervous of not making this something they’d remember. Despite what Kyoko said- the idea of, somehow, failing them, scared him.

“Koto?” Their voice was spoken softly from the bathroom, and he made quick strides to approach with a curious tilt of the head.

“Yeah?”

“Can you help me with this? I’m not sure how well this fits…” 

“Oh, sure,” He knocked gently to make sure it was okay first, before after a little acknowledging hum, opening the door gently. 

Inside, his eyes fixated towards his partner’s outfit, feeling his face flush a bit as he slowly stepped inside. 

They adorned a maroon colored suit- one they had worn once or twice, but not often enough for Makoto to not get any less flustered whenever he saw them in it. They always thought it was cute to wear something with “his colors”, and it was cute in a way that he had to suppress an internal little yelp. The item in question they were struggling with, was the dark green tie, trying this way and that and only making it even more messed up. He saw in the mirror how badly they were cringing, and his flustered state broke into a small fit of chuckles.

“Okay, stop doing...that...and come here,” He gently came up behind them, leaning over their shoulder to kiss the side of their cheek before turning them around to fix the tie, “You do it like this…”

As he helped them with their tie, he could see from the corners of his vision as they stared up towards him, mouth slightly agape in soft awe.

“...You uh….you look...nice.” They stuttered out softly, biting their lower lip. Makoto smiled softly to his partner, adjusting the collar of their undershirt so it covered the bruises along their neck.

Of course, he had dressed better for the occasion, himself. Wearing shades of softer baby-blues and teals, with a white tie. 

“I know you can say more than that,” He teased lightly, lightly booping their nose, “Am I right?”

“What, do you want me to call you handsome, hot stuff?” They seemed to quickly rebound from his cheeky remark, draping an arm over his shoulder. Flustering up, the luckster gave a sheepish little chuckle- unable to meet their intense little gaze.

“N-now that’s...not fair,” He remarked playfully, only to finally look back over to them when they rested their head against his chest. 

“Just like you in that suit isn’t fair, but we do gotta sometimes deal with shit not being fair, huh, darling?” Smriking to themselves, they watch Makoto’s face turn even brighter shades of Red, before pushing them gently off of him.

“Now you stop that, we’ll never leave on time if you keep doing that-” He said with a little laugh, gently running a hand through their hair, “You ready to go?”

“Mmhm. Can I have my glasses back by chance?”

“Oh, right! Here!” As he went to fish out their glasses, he almost grabbed the small ring box- which he kept in the same pocket. Panic for a brief second brushed over his face, but he handed the glasses off with ease.

“You okay, angel?” Ren picked up on his anxiety easily, “You seem really...nervous.”

“Pfft, you always make me a bit nervous when I take you out like this,” Makoto quickly brushed it off, “Plus, I thought I left your glasses somewhere for a second there. Don’t worry about it too much.” 

Ren rose an eyebrow of doubt, one that made Makoto even more nervous...they were pretty good at picking at other people’s lies… was he caught already?

And it was true, Ren did pick up on Makoto’s nervousness...but, they also knew Makoto didn’t lie often without good reason behind it. 

“...Alright…?” They decided to let it go for now, “If you say so, let’s get going then!!”

 Smiling to himself in relief, he offered his hand to them- one they took with an excited pep in their step- before headed out to see what the day awaited them. 

»»————-　★　————-««

“...Darling. I don’t, persay...question your decisions but uhm...is this really the wisest choice?”

Ren’s voice came out as a soft squeak as they stared outside the window of the helicopter they were seated in alongside their partner. Makoto, knowing the reluctance was coming, put a hand on their arm.

“Okay, okay, I know what this might look like…”

“Like a bad decision?”

Outside the window, a looming figure sat just in the distance. The looming figure of construction- a construction site that was empty today. What was once Hope’s Peak Academy...the project that was being rebuilt- under Makoto’s strict guidance. 

“...Yes, that,” Makoto admitted to himself, “But... I figured...we could make better memories here. Just for today, let’s just...let go of what happened, and have some fun in the town we were going to grow up in.”

To which, he once again offered them his hand as he got up. Hesitant for a few moments, they look back out the window...ever since the Killing Game, they’ve had frequent nightmares of what happened. Of what they almost did, and who did die. Part of them knew, in their soul, that this was a terrible idea…

…But they trusted him.

So, they took his hand once again, letting him help them to their feet and off the helicopter. 

Stepping around the ‘No Trespassing’ signs, Makoto lead Ren inside. Most of the building itself was done, that was true- but there were still some things...mostly plumbing, electricity, stuff of that sort, as well as the basement and top floors.

The building itself was massive- back to its five story glory- but the design was entirely different from how it used to be. Not only allowing for more accessibility, but the ability to have the access to mental health accessibility as well- as Ren basically demanded he do for the sake of the students. 

As they meandered inside, they observed the main entranceway- which was one of the few things very reminiscent of their memories of Hopes Peak. A decorated, somewhat plain room- with places marked out for trophy cases and plaques and flags. It was oddly desolate, the lights having not been installed yet- which Makoto dealt with by turning on his phone’s flashlight. 

It almost reminded them of...that...day…

Their heart seized gently in their chest, making their face scrunch up as they tried not to focus on their panic. It’s fine, it’s okay...they weren’t there anymore, they just had to remind themselves that. 

Makoto seemed a bit preoccupied though, not quite noticing how the brunette at his side was panicking lightly. 

“It’s coming along great, Makoto…” They mumbled, unable to keep their tone any louder than that- careful not to shatter the silence that filled its newer halls. It’s less bloodstained halls.

“Isn’t it? I can’t believe we’re going to be changing the course of history together.” Makoto’s eyes sparkled at that, and Ren gave a soft, melancholy smile and leaned into his side.

“Yeah...changing history. Changing what happened in the past...we can’t erase it...but we can heal from it.” They mumbled, relaxing once more. Makoto smiled at his partner, not quite noticing the slight traces of distress in their eyes as he further led them into the halls of Hope's Peak.

Most of the afternoon was spent like that, going through the halls of Hope's Peak- hiding away in secret corners of the school to kiss, goof off; do all the things that the killing game had robbed them of- the feeling of the past being their own. The two may be adults- well past it; Ren was around twenty-one at this point, and Makoto was just a little older by a few months- but they still acted like the goofy nineteen year olds they still were at heart. 

Still, the further they followed him- the further they felt...uneasy. Not the sort’ve uneasy of a shady date, or that you were being watched walking home at night...but the sort’ve uneasiness that makes one feel quite...sick.

...The sort’ve uneasiness that came from building a school atop a graveyard.

“Darling,” Ren spoke up as they were headed back down towards the main hall, “Do you think it might’ve been a...bad...idea...rebuilding Hopes Peak in the same spot as its predecessor?” 

Looking down towards his tiny partner, he wraps an arm over their shoulders with a soft little sigh.

“I did realize that, yeah...but by then, it was definitely too late into construction to really...take it back, y’know?” He admitted, his opposite hand awkwardly rubbing at the back of his neck, “So we kinda just gotta...roll with it. If anyone does ask, we should probably be honest but...So long as no one asks, right?”

As he thought aloud on the matter, he steered them in the direction of a blacktop area towards the back of the school. Sure, they weren’t kids anymore that exactly REQUIRED a playground, persay- but Ren thought it would be wise to have the option open for those who dislike sitting during most of the school day...to at least give others the opportunity to- in between classes- get some space to be as overly hyper as they want. Makoto also designed an overhang- so that even if it was raining it could still be available. 

“I suppose so...the less people know about the history of the past Hope’s Peak, the better. It’d be bad for the reputation of the school- and of us…” Ren mumbled to themselves as they followed behind, only to slowly come to a stop in the double doors of the blacktop. Makoto had gone ahead only for a moment, only to slowly stop and look back to them.

“Ren?”

“I...ah..” The words had all but left their mouth. It wasn’t because of anything he had done, no...but the surroundings just suddenly felt so...much. Their eyes were trained to the fencing that surrounded the blacktop, struggling to clearly focus. Sure, they were able to ignore the feeling before in the main entranceway, and they were able to...ignore the unease going about the halls of the school- able to ignore the feeling of otherworldly presence. 

...What they CAN’T ignore, is the almost petrifying grip on their heart at remembering the last time they stood before a chained fence in this school.

Echoes of their own screaming rang in the distance of their thoughts, and the feeling of their palms stinging made them feel...nauseous. They wanted to look- to check their hand to remind themselves they were okay...but they couldn’t tear their gaze off from the- seemingly- middle distance. 

“Ren? Ren, hey!” Makoto quickly made his way back to them, putting a hand on his shoulder, making them flinch. The fear in their eyes spoke for itself- they had to be having a flashback episode... Makoto wasn’t a stranger to this- having a few himself and having witnessed Ren go through many, many episodes of this in the past. 

He couldn’t be more wrong...Their vision was starting to warp, a distant dissociative fuzziness making their heart ache. All they could see was...blood. It stained the corners of their vision- stained him…

And all they could be reminded of, was one simple...plain fact- at least one that was plain to them.

‘If it wasn’t for his luck, he would’ve been killed. And its your fault.’

“I-I…” Makoto watched them trying to say something, no words coming out. By then, he quickly sat down on the steps of the blacktop, gently bringing them to sit with him, a hand gently tracing shapes into their palm in a weak attempt to try and get them to stop dissociating in a...non-disruptive manner...He wasn’t sure what to do- despite all these years he hadn’t quite learned how to bring them down from an episode. He knew what to do after- and how to prevent one from even happening but...what caused the episode to begin with…?

And it was only the moment after he asked himself that, that he realized his fatal error.

Sure, like himself, they had PTSD. 

What he forgot about, was how potent their emotions are...and by proxy, just how absolutely batshit cruel their PTSD and other mental illnesses were on them.

But, before he could turn to ask if they wanted to leave the school for a few hours while they calmed down and explored the remains of their city, they got up- turning on heel and bolting back off down the hallway.

“Ren!”

But they didn’t hear his call out to them, instead all they could hear was the pounding in their ears, the exclamation of a cry from the past; the blood that dripped from their hands from their grip on a rusty metal fence that they gripped too hard…

All they could feel, all that they were- was that small period of time. A small period of time that should’ve been so, so insignificant to them, compared to all the other BULLSHIT they’ve dealt with in Hopes Peak… but scarred them so deeply, that it practically haunted them in their dreams.

All they knew was to run. Run away from their feelings like they always did. Run away from their past like they ALWAYS did...but what else could they do? They couldn’t...they couldn’t just pretend those feelings didn’t exist- THAT sure as hell didn’t work before. They couldn’t face those feelings- they just...made them that much worse.

So they did the only thing they could know that worked. Run. Run away. 

They didn’t look up from their hands, simply hiding their eyes in their palms- lest they see anything else they didn’t want to see. They just...they knew they just needed to get out and away from the school. They had to get away from that graveyard....where all their friends lie.

They tripped. Many times, they tripped, and fell, scuffing up their jacket and scraping their knees against pavement. Everytime, they just as quickly peeled themselves off the ground though, taking off further into the city. Their head felt so...swimmy.

They could’ve sworn they heard Makoto behind them- calling out to them, trying to chase after them...they couldn’t bear to face him though, not at that moment- not when they still smelled blood from the previous executions, not when they failed to protect him in the past. 

How could he even stand to be around them when they were a failure?...

Their thoughts were abruptly broken though, tripping over something else and landing flat on their face. Their blood was pounding, and they tasted iron in their mouth, shaking a bit as they made a slight effort to sit back up…Their thoughts had seemingly flooded back out their ears, everything was almost...eerily quiet…

...Save of course, for a very familiar whirr of a blaster- one that, upon looking up, was aimed right at their temple. 

‘...So this is how I die. Huh. Would’ve thought I got myself first.’

Though, like many times before, this wouldn’t be their death- and like many times before, it was because of Makoto. Squeezing their eyes shut, they prepared for the inevitable- however when the sound of another blaster went off...they found they were...fine? 

Looking up, they saw Makoto behind them- not too far behind- one of the blasters in hand.

“Makoto…” The name slipped out of their mouth before they could think twice on it, “I-”

“It’s alright, apologize later,” Makoto reassured them, quickly walking over to offer them a hand back up. However, his concerned expression shifted to a stern one upon looking up from their form. More of those dual colored...creatures….? Robots?...He still didn’t quite know what the little monokuma-bots were- all he did know was that there were more of them. Pulling them to their feet, Makoto shifted his suit jacket to cover them, hiding their face into his chest as he fired the blaster again. 

“I knew they were likely still in the city, but seriously- How did it get this bad?!” He mumbled to himself, switching the settings on the blaster and firing again, successfully at least distracting them for a few moments.

“C’mon, let’s go!” He whispered to them, moving his jacket a bit more to look to them. His poor partner looked on the verge of tears… How did he manage to mess up this badly?! 

‘I can scold myself later,’ He had to remind himself, as he grabbed their hand and went to peel off- them in tow, ‘I just need to get us somewhere safe for now.’

Luck wasn’t...exactly always on his side though. As the two were making a sprint back relatively towards the school, the luckster could only have the time to hear and process the whir of another blaster from beside him, before turning and trying to yank Ren out of harms way. Of course, this didn’t get them...completely out of harm. Something he realized when they stumbled and fell back onto the ground, a hand over their mouth as they struggled not to scream. Makoto stopped, dropping down to pick them back up- and saw the tear in their pants- right by their ankle...and the searing burn mark just behind the torn cloth.

Swearing lightly to himself, he set them down only for the briefest moment to give another shock of electricity to the damn robot that dared hurt them- an almost threatening shimmer in his eyes. 

‘Whoa.’ Ren blinked in surprise for a few minutes, despite the tears now actively trickling from their cheeks and onto the pavement. Though, they had little to no time to think about it, as within the next moment the blaster was holstered and Ren was scooped back up unto Makoto’s arms.

“You’ve certainly gotten stronger…” They muttered, trying to crack a bit of a joke despite their voice cracking from the pain in their leg. 

“Ren…” He shot them a look that portrayed that, no, now was absolutely not the time for jokes. Nodding to him, they hid their face into his jacket as he quickly ran back off once again, knowing he needed to get them both out of that situation.

It took a bit, having to set them back down a few times to clear a good path back towards the school, but eventually he got them to sit back down on the steps- catching their breath and processing what the hell just happened.

But with it, came that feeling of guilt...on both sides.

“Makoto I’m-” Ren went to say something first, put he put a hand over their mouth to quiet them down.

“Don’t...I-It was my mistake to bring you here without any warning or anything...Or not noticing you weren’t feeling well.” He reassured them, “I’m just glad I didn’t lose you…”

That being said, he pulled them close to hug them tightly, needing a moment to just...remind himself that they were here. Injured, yes, but still alive. Still okay. And the way their hands shakily went to bury themselves into his back reassured him that.

...What didn’t, was the soft little hiccup of a shaky breath, and the weep that followed. 

“Ren…”

“I just...I don’t feel safe here. I don’t feel- I can’t- I…” They stuttered over themselves, hiding their face into the crook of his neck and trying to keep from screaming- from completely bawling their eyes out, “Our friends...died here. Died on these grounds...YOU almost died, I almost lost you and-”

“-And that wasn’t your fault, Ren.” He’d been here before...he had this conversation with them many times, a hand gently entangled into the curls of their hair in attempts to calm them down a bit, “I chose to do that...I chose to do that to protect you, and Kyoko, and Hina, and everyone. Because if we lost Kyoko...or even if we lost you…I don’t think we would’ve gotten out of there alive.”

Ren just shook their head, muffling a sob into his collar, “It still...it still… haunts me.”

“I know…”

“It still hurts…”

“I know…..” 

He just cradled the back of their head, gently, a familiar ache in his heart hearing them sob into his shoulder. Even after all this time, they both still had so much further to go. Even after all this time- they both still had to grow, a lot, in order to embrace the past. 

..Or rather, step within fifty feet of the past without having a panic attack, at least. 

He hid his face into their shoulder in turn, muffling a soft sigh of relief with the fabric of their somewhat scuffed up jacket. Even after all this time, he didn’t know what to say to at least assure them that...their feelings were okay. Not too much, not too little, but...okay. 

“I’m here for you, Ren,” Was all he eventually said, “I’m here.”

He felt them sigh, pulling away from his embrace only just enough to look to him, mumbling something to him that was indecipherable. Shifting his palm from the back of their head to their cheek, he tilts his head.

“What was that?”

“...C-Can we just...head home, please? I don’t...feel safe here.” They repeated, eyes slightly reddened from crying, face flushed with emotion. He watched their movements for a moment, leaning a bit into the palm of his hand, nuzzling towards his touch- the same hand with his promise ring on it. 

Though his heart sunk at the realization that his plan had completely and utterly failed, in pretty much every aspect...he can’t even say he was too surprised. His luck wasn’t always the best, and maybe...just maybe… he over-thought of how to do things.

‘Kirigiri’s going to rip me a new one...’ He thought to himself as he nodded softly, managing a soft smile.

“Yeah, let’s go. There’s a first aid kit in the helicopter anyway, we can patch up the burn there.” Makoto mumbled with a resolute little nod, getting back to his feet and helping the brunette to theirs- although having to dead-man-carry them due to the limp in their step. 

The whole time, he really did think about how to apologize for the disaster the day had ended up being- and wondered how long they had been uncomfortable but just...didn’t say anything. He remembered how they were acting even before they stepped out of the helicopter, and could almost feel the imprint of the mental facepalm he did. 

All the same, all he could do for now was...damage control. Almost quite literally. While they were headed back, Makoto spent most of his time in the helicopter tending to the wound on their leg. Thankfully, it wasn’t too bad, just a bit of a burn...if Makoto hadn’t been paying attention, that thing would’ve definitely taken their leg out.

...Or worse.

Some antiseptic, a little bit of a cooling pad, and a bit of gauze around their leg, and they were alright. The limp in their step seemed to mainly be a pulled muscle, they’d be fine in a few days...he should thank the stars above that they seemed to have lucked out. Some cuts here, scrapes there- the most damage that was caused was to their suit jacket and pants. Which he already planned on paying for a new one, once he can afford it.

The ride was mostly quiet, Ren having put on their headphones to listen to some music to calm down on their way back to their apartment complex- a future foundation complex. And of course, that silence was accompanied with Makoto stirring in his own thoughts. To be honest- this whole idea...wasn’t his original plan. The original plan- the one he ran by Kyoko a few days prior- was one that involved visiting their hometown. But he wasn’t sure HOW they’d take that, given what they’ve told him about their family. He panicked, and threw something else together. 

...Kirigiri was absolutely going to murder him, if Ren didn’t first- once they calm down.

»»————-　★　————-««

Time passed by slowly once they got back...Makoto went to go take a shower- again- since he wasn’t also without being a bit scuffed up from chasing after them. Under the heat of the water, he just hoped that he could make it up to them for the disaster of a day...and that they didn’t blame themselves too much for the whole thing. 

Despite this, when he stepped back out from the shower- dressed back down into his usual attire of a hoodie and sweats, he found them sitting on the floor, hands running through their hair as if trying to get a grip on themselves. He found himself at their side in an instant, a hand on their shoulder.

“Ren?”

The only response he got was a low whine in the back of their throat- he hadn’t gotten them to speak much since they asked to go home...which, by then, was a few hours ago. 

“Hey,” He rubbed circles with his thumb into their shoulder, “Talk to me, please?”

“I’m sorry…” Their voice was above a whisper, “I-I made a mess of things...I made such a mess of things.”

Sighing, and having expected this, he got up for a brief moment to get them a bottle of water… he didn’t want them to get too dehydrated. 

“You didn’t make a mess of things, Ren…” He assured them as he went back to them, instead sitting in front of them.

“I fucked things up...it’s not even the same school, it’s not what it was, and yet I-” 

“-You had a flashback episode. That’s fine. Ren that wasn’t your fault. That wasn’t anyone’s fault.” Makoto quickly intercepted their train of thought, “...What you remembered...Ren, it was about my execution, right?”

“...” Their silence said enough, unable to meet his gaze as they took the bottle from his hands and took a cautious little sip of it. 

Sighing, Makoto just looked down and fiddled with his jacket, “I can’t ever ask you to completely forget about the whole thing. I can’t ever ask you to put your feelings aside, but what I can assure you of...is that no matter what, I’ll still be here for you. I’m not going to just up and leave you that easily.” 

“I...I know,” They mumbled, “I just… I almost lost you. I almost lost someone else in my life because- at least, at the time- it just...felt like someone else wanting to get away from me.”

“Ren…”

“Why did you...bring me there, Makoto?” They asked, their tone starting to lace with something he could only recognize as a frustrated desperation, “I...Fuck, fucks sake Makoto- You should’ve known better.” 

Can’t say he didn’t deserve that. Still didn’t stop him from reeling a bit in surprise.

“I-I’m….sorry, Soren,” He mumbled, a mix of surprise but guilt in his tone- remaining genuine all the same, though equally starting to panic, “I...actually had other plans for today, but I wasn’t sure how you’d react to those either and I kinda panicked and…”

“Makoto, why did you want to take me out so badly anyway? I mean, we’ve had dates out before, but not to such a...grand scale! You were always usually fine with just planning nights in and such, what happened?” They questioned, eyebrows furrowing in concern, starting to ramble as well, “Is it me? D-do you want me to do more, put more effort? A-am I not doing enough?”

“No, no!” Makoto quickly interjected, starting to panic even more at their nervous panic, “That’s not it at all- I just wanted to treat you to something nice-”

“But why?!” 

“Because I just want to marry you, Soren!”

...The silence that followed could be broken with a pindrop. Makoto had quickly slapped a hand over his mouth following his sudden exclamation, face turning as red as a tomato. 

He literally just said that, didn’t he? His luck couldn’t get much worse tonight. 

Still, as he tried to- and failed- to think of what to say...what to even respond to his own little outburst... All he could do was watch, frozen, as Ren equally froze up for a few seconds in shock, before blushing and quickly looking away with a little giggle.

“Well...o-of course I do wanna marry you too, Koto,” They sheepishly respond, before Makoto quickly shook his head.

“N-no, no, that’s not what I…” Snapping out of it, he stuttered before giving a little sigh, running a hand over his face in his own self-frustration, “...Soren, listen.”

He started rifling through his pockets, as he continued to speak, “When we met...Rather- when we FIRST actually met, in Hopes Peak...you were the only person who knew how I felt. You were the only one who understood what it felt like, to feel like you didn't belong. And we...we grew together. When we got our memory erased...It was like everything had reset. All pretense of who we were, all of our memories...and yet, somehow we were still...drawn to each other. You saved me from losing my mind in that...hell...And I saved you from actually losing your life.”

That got Ren to at least laugh, which got Makoto to loosen up a bit. 

“Even after we basically had our entire minds wiped to before we started going to Hopes Peak, we were still...always kind’ve drawn to protect and be there for eachother. You were there for me when I found out Maizono originally wanted to...betray me… and I just...I want to be there for you. Forever…”

“Makoto…” Ren giggled sheepishly, flushed a bit, “It almost sounds like you’re…”

Their voice trailed off when he took their hand, squeezing it gently to get them to look to him, to which he only gave a shy little nod. Watching them start to tear up with the realization as he finally found the ring he tucked into his pocket...Wait- where the hell was the box?...

...Screw it, he’ll just roll with it- everything else today has been a bit messy.

Taking out the ring, he smiled a bit to himself before chuckling and feeling his face flush even more.

“I guess what I mean to say is… you’re the one I want to be with. Would you...do me the honor of marrying me?”

It was then, he showed Ren the ring he had picked out- a Moonstone ring...he remembered it was one of their favorite gemstones, wrapped delicately in soft green and blue much tinier rhinestones and stainless steel. They were already starting to cry, watching them struggle to process what they were being told for a few moments before taking his hand- the one that was still gently squeezing their own- and giving it a gentle squeeze of their own before managing a smile.

“Koto…” Their voice was cracking as they tried to keep it together, “I- Jeez...t-this is what you wanted to do today?”

“Eheh...I may have...overthought the whole thing,” Makoto admitted, about to start explaining his whole discussion with Kyoko- only to get bowled over by his tiny brunette partner, who gave a soft little squeak of elation. 

“Whoa-!”

“Yes, you huge dork, yes!” They exclaimed, hugging him tightly. Makoto laughed and returned the gesture, only responding with, “You know, you can’t keep tackling me every time you want to hug me- I only have a set amount of ribs!” 

“Ehehe, sorry!” They giggled a bit and freed him of their embrace, sitting back up to let the poor luckster get back up. Still, sitting up- close to each other, he smiled, offering them the ring. 

“May I?”

Giggling like the lovesick little cat they were, they nodded, offering their hand- to which Makoto swapped the fidget-promise ring they had adorned for all these years with the real engagement ring. Ren was still teary, and embraced him again with a fit of giggles and tears. 

“I love you, you big goober…” They whispered to him, affectionately kissing his cheeks and nuzzling back into his neck. Kissing their hair, he chuckled a bit and gently squeezed them to him.

“Does this make up for the disaster of a day?” He asked them, which got him lightly smacked on the arm and only got him to laugh even more. Still, when they retreated from his neck, they only gently cradled the back of his neck before pressing a gentle kiss to his mouth.

“Angel, no amount of shitty days would make you owe me for them,” They reassured him, “However…”

They got up, despite the slight limp they had on their foot, slowly starting to back up with a very familiar chaotic smirk on their features, “This is...absolutely...not going to stop me… from telling Kirigiri how you fucked up that date~!” 

And then they turned on heel and booked it right out the door. Laughing to himself, he quickly got to his feet and ran after them, knowing they were- mostly- joking. 

“Ren, don’t you fucking DARE-!”

[arabian-bloodstream]

Gendrya Confirmation, Bitches!

OK, so technically, no, it's not confirmed, but I'm taking this bit of detective work on my part as confirmation, damnit! (Not that I didn't already 100% believe that Gendrya was happening and have been pretty darn firm in that belief all along.) So before I jump to that, I need to set it up and so I shall...

Alrighty then, I wrote a post full of happy-happy-joy-joy, entitled: "Oh, my precious babies! So endgame!" a few weeks ago. I wrote this after the episode when most of the Gendrya fanbase was not very happy. You know, that would be episode 04, yeah, the one when Gendry dropped to his knee and proposed and Arya was all, 'Nah, I'm good' and went back to her target practice while his little heart crumpled to a million pieces before our very eyes. Yeah, that one.

Meanwhile, I was all "YES!" at the end of episode because my precious babies were clearly endgame in my eyes! True story, look at the date on that linked post. So the main reason why I felt so positive about Arya and Gendry after episode 04 was because of the first scene with the Hound and the final scene with the Hound. As I wrote in that post:

In the first scene, Gendry and the Hound were at the feast celebrating the North’s victory over the undead–Arya’s victory. And, of course, Arya was nowhere to be found.

  Gendry: Have you seen Arya?   The Hound: You can still smell the burning bodies and that’s where your head is at?   Gendry: I just want to thank her–   The Hound: I’m sure you do.   Gendry: Look, it’s not about that.   The Hound: Of course it’s about that, you twat. Why shouldn’t it be? The dead are dead. You’re not.

The Hound made it pretty clear he was well aware that Gendry wanted to *be* with Arya and when Gendry tried to deny it, the Hound called him on it and, surprisingly, pointed out that it was exactly what he should be doing. Now, let’s make this clear. Gendry wanted to celebrate LIFE with *Arya* and the Hound flat-out told him that such was exactly the thing he should be doing.

Contrast this with the final conversation the Hound has in the episode.

    Arya: You’re heading to King’s Landing.     The Hound: I have some unfinished business.     Arya: Me too.     The Hound: I don’t plan on coming back.     Arya: Neither do I.

So we have the show using The Hound to illustrate that *Gendry* is life as Gendry wanted to celebrate life with Arya–who you remember was “celebrating” by shooting arrows at a target–and on the opposite spectrum, that Arya has indeed once more chosen a life of death. Now, at the end of that discussion, he also asked that if he needs her to kill him, will she just leave him to not die again and she said probably… which means, that they probably will wind up in a situation like that, but this time she will give him mercy. However, before she does, he’ll tell her to choose life. Something like: Go get that blacksmith cunt that’s always mooning over you and have lots of black-haired babies with him. Don’t be like me. Don’t chase death your whole life. Live.

I later expounded exclusively on that theme in greater detail here in a post (not surprisingly) titled: Arya's Choice. In that one, I discussed the entangling of the Hound and Gendry in Arya's storyline throughout season 08 going back to their reunions with her taking place together. In this meta, I wrote:

The reason that Arya’s first scene with Gendry and the Hound was done TOGETHER [...] is because they represent opposite choices of her life going forth.

The Hound is death.

Gendry is life.

It’s all tied up together. Gendry (life) chose to walk away from her all those years away, and then Arya ran away and was captured by the Hound (death). Now Gendry (life) offered himself to her, but she chose to walk away and met up with the Hound (death). It’s eventually going to come down to Arya making the choice herself to walk away from death–which I believe that the Hound will push her to do–and choose life, choose Gendry.

As noted above, I even gave him some dialogue when I did think that Arya would give him mercy. (Although to be fair, I thought that Arya would do so because everyone around me kept saying she would do so. I hadn't really thought that would happen before it kept getting pushed at me. :shrugs:) But the main thing is that I thought he would give her the push to live comparing his life to hers. No, he didn't mention anything about Gendry--nor (and I can't believe I'm saying this because I'm not particularly fond of the word, but coming from Sandor Clegane it was always hilariously used) did a 'cunt' come from him all season long. He died without uttering it even once. Sad.

Anyhoo. Comparing part of my "something like this" dialogue for his parting words to Arya with what he actually said? I think I nailed it pretty closely.

My words: Don’t be like me. Don’t chase death your whole life. Live. His words: You think you've wanted revenge a long time? I've been after it all my life. It's all I care about and look at me. LOOK AT ME! You want to be like me? You come with me, you die here.

Same point getting across there. And this is what David Benioff said about the scene itself "Inside the Episode” that was on Youtube right after the show aired.

It's a small scene, but it's also, for us, one of the most important scenes in the whole episode because it's the culmination of their story together. The road to vengeance always ends in one place. Which is what the Hound is saying to her here. "I've made my choice a long time ago, and this can only end in one possible way for me. But for you, you have so many other options.

The Hound has genuinely come to have affection for Arya. I think he loves her, as much as he's capable of loving someone. And he knows that if she comes with him at this point, she's not gonna make it out of there.

So, yeah... Nailed it! And if the Hound is death... then doesn't that then make Gendry life considering how they’ve so closely entangled the two characters with Arya this season? Especially with the contrasts? Not only the conversations in episode 04, but Arya choosing to not spend her final hours with the miserable old shits (The Hound, and yes, Beric, but the Hound was the key one there) but instead having sex with Gendry. And sex well, its main purpose is to, you know, create life. And then there’s the first time she saw them both this season in episode 01, “Winterfell,” Arya spied the Hound and then Gendry arrive. The Hound rode in upon a black horse. Gendry? A white horse.

After she turned down Gendry's proposal--in my analysis, rejecting life--and joined the Hound on the road to King's Landing to commit regicide, expecting to not come out of it alive--accepting death--she rode a black horse.

After listening to Sandor's words, after choosing to let Cersei die by a means other than her hand, running through the streets of death and chaos, fighting to live, fighting to try and help others live, surviving because the God of Death declared that no, my former pupil, death was not happening, not today, Arya Stark stood amidst all of that death and she stood in the light. The sun shone upon her and she saw a way out of that darkness, away from all of that death, back to life. She saw a white horse.

And she rode on that white horse away from death. To life? To Gendry? I think so.

Now, taking all of that into account, the Arya and the tangling of Gendry and the Hound--which just had to definitively be deliberate--here's where my little detective work brought me to my final definitive GENDRYA CONFIRMATION, BITCHES! moment.  In early Spring, D.B. Weiss and Daniel Benioff helped create a new Spotify playlist: Game of Thrones: The End Is Coming. Upon doing so, they told For the Record in an email, “The answer to the ending is one hundred percent hidden in the playlist choices. No one will believe us, but it’s true.”

Well, a friend of mine and I have been going through each song to try and guess which songs apply to which characters and situations as we're heading into the final inning. And then I got to one particular song and I literally said: "OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG! GENDRYA CONFIMRATION, BITCHES!" And this is why.

This is from the official Game of Thrones Youtube channel: It is titled: Game of Thrones | Season 8 Episode 5 | The Hound's Gift (HBO).  The description of the video is: Maisie Williams explains Arya's choice. Yeah, you read that right. Uh huh, please do make note that my post written a week or so ago about the Hound = Death and Gendry = Life, and that Arya will choose life (thus Gendry) was titled "Arya's Choice" and I done wrote that on May 06, 2019! I'm just saying. Ahem, anyhoo. So, the video has Maisie talking about the "gift" that the Hound gives Arya.

This is a really important moment, the Hound realizing that "I don't think this kid knows what she's gonna get into." And turning around and giving her this incredible gift, which is the second ticket to a new life.

He's wanted revenge his entire life, and do you wanna be like him? "Is that what you want?" Just a moment in Arya where all those emotions that she’s been trying to suppress and trying to ignore and trying to focus on the task at hand all bubble up again, and this man who she cares so much about and has learned so much from and admires so much turned around and says ‘You don’t want this. You—you go.' She realizes there is another way. There is another life that she could have.

We tell real stories about real people and in this season, Arya decides against being that character that people love, and she decides to, to take her life into her own hands and take control of what she wants.

Let's break what she says down a bit first. Obviously, all of this lines completely up with where I've seen this going. Arya steps away from the whole list-friendly, death-first Arya-'assassin' that "people love." And it makes me sad that Maisie does know that so many people do love that iteration of Arya. It makes me so sad because Arya is so, so much more. *sigh*

The reaction to the idea of Arya having sex, showing interest in *that* kind of relationship--because no, it wasn't all just about the fact that it was watching a girl we watched grow up, there was definitely a lot of... but that's not Arya!, she's an assassin-baby!--shows that she definitely has a point. Still, what she says here makes it quite clear that, yes, Arya IS going to step away from that. Having Sandor basically say to her that she doesn't want to be a miserable old shit like him was a real wake-up call.

Her first "ticket" to life was obviously the coin from Jaqen Hagar. This is her second, and getting that from the Hound who has seen and been through so much shit with Arya, plus seeing the devastating horror of rampant death and destruction all around her has brought that message home loud and clear. She does not want that life, his life. Which is death. She is choosing now to take what she wants. And what does she want? Well, that brings me (finally!) to that OMG! moment.

Remember what I said above about the Game of Thrones spotify list and those clues that D&D talked about. Well, while going through the songs, and having watched this particular video clip the day before, I was pretty damn shook when I got to the end of "No One Knows" By Queens of the Stone Age. Here are the complete lyrics. However, what I want to focus on is the chorus and the outro as we close out the song.

[Chorus] And I realize you're mine Indeed a fool am I And I realize you're mine Indeed a fool am I Ahh

[Outro] Heaven smiles above me What a gift here below But no one knows A gift that you give to me No one knows

That's right.

"What a gift here below, but no one knows. A gift that you give to me. No one knows."

The Hound gave Arya a gift. Arya was No One.

Thus my "OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG! GENDRYA CONFIMRATION, BITCHES!"

Yeah. They are the ship that is promised. BOOYAH!

(Plus, yeah, all of the other reasons I’ve talked about ad nauseum over the last month!)