#i wanna draw or write or SOMETHING but idk what
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So, to add on to Navi's post, because her whole read for the original was getting screenshots from the game to debunk what was said, of course....we are now here. I want to tell you that no one here disagreed with your conclusion about Ganondorf being a victim. What we here disagreed with was the method you used to get there. Simplifying Ganondorf down to solely good or solely evil is something this Fandom does all the time with little to no nuance. And even though you have written an eloquent essay, Published even! You twisted or outright made up parts of the game to get to your conclusion. In essay writing, that's called a logical fallacy, and the whole essay either twists what happens in the game or outright gets it wrong.
Now people are probably gonna wonder why I'm treating this like a big deal or why I'm speaking so blunt, because this is by all means very stupid fandom drama.
But I think when you're a college prof and you get an essay published and it's online for people to read everywhere without you, one, not giving the context behind Ganondorf's creation and the coding of his appearance and motivations, two the complexities of a corporate conglomerate in a notoriously socially conservative country taking aesthetics from countries who were historically colonized. And Three, The way that video games are a collaborative effort with usually no singular vision, this is very true at nintendo despite what people may think, and at any moment changes can be made for any reason by team leads or executives that would hinder or even hurt a story. It detrimental to the audience reading it that you do not provide them more of a couple of screenshots
Basically, many things go into a story and now I'm taking this more from a DOYLIST view right here talking about Nintendo. But I'm doing this because you keep trying to say..... well fuck man do I need to pull up more examples? Navi got them all, the whole essay is you trying HEAVILY to imply that Nintendo MEANT to do all of this, as in intentional in the story, idk I feel crazy, words have meaning, specific wording has implication, oh and this dosent even get into how localization can change things 😃😀 wording has meaning and sometimes translators don't have cultural contexxxtttttttt and to not even mention about Nintendo's history or even the short hand that comes from Ganondorf's design and the historical Orientalism behind it feels like a disservice to the paper, but much more qualified people then I have discussed the way Ganondorf is written and probably would love to discuss or link to previous writing again if asked.
And this is a cold take but Nintendo isn’t the place you should be looking to for deep story telling, they will always be a corporate entity first and the bottom line is a general audience, this does not mean JUST KIDS this means to a generalized population. And this is extremely cynical but a lot of people cant even handle the complexity of a female character who is mean, like Midna, do you really think people would handle a Ganondorf like how he is in Tp being portrayed in any form of film language as good????? This game dropped 5 years after 9/11, Nintendo was never gonna lose out in money like that.
And Dude people have given so much shit to HUGE fanartists and comic authors about their work portraying Ganondorf in a sympathetic light, you would of thunk more people would of picked up on Ganondorf's story being written as tragedy if there was something in the game that actually DID that. Maybe they would of written a blog post about how Midna saw Link kill Ganondorf and was ashamed of that or Ganondorf TOTALLY said the history of light and shadow will be written in blood thing before the final battle, you think people would of talked about huh why did Ganondorf say that there or something and maybe went 🤔 instead of it being argued that Tp Ganondorf had the weakest writing of the series until TotK threw a pile of flaming shit at my door with a picture of Ganondorf on it.
Navi also goes in depth on how Hyrule has not exactly stagnated like what was claimed in History of Light and Shadow by using the Goron merchants and Yeto as examples.
Rynling has stated that the cause of the stagnation and decline is due to an ineffectual leader that has "Not allowed its people to be revitalized by change and diversity."
Now I am familiar with the flaws of an undetermined national unity, I am very familiar with the subject, but I’m not going to speak like an authority. Id rather let someone much more qualified make that post and I link back to it, because i know its coming. But Navi said in her post that the idea of what could of happened at Arbiter's Grounds can completely blow over someone's head if they didn't play OoT first, and I think more or less this is accurate, certain things are lost in Wind Waker even with the recaps, but I wanna join in on this in my own way...
Rynling....you may say Hyrule has been on a decline during Tp......you may even think OoT had a more stable Hyrule or some shit.....i THINK YOU FORGOT ABOUT THE PLOT OF OCARINA OF TIME BAYBEEEEEEE
THE SUPPLEMENTAL MATERIAL THAT I CAN PULL UP TO PROVE MY SHIT ABOUT OOT HYRULE BEING DOG SHIT IN COMPARISON TO TP
Like if you're seriously gonna link me and Navi to your essay then I am about to go full BTW it's a Sativa and eat that bitch after midnight cuZ we YELLIN ABOUT OCARINA OF TIME ON THIS POST FOR EVERYONE🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
All of Ocarina of Time's narrative is haunted by the civil war, the whole reason why Link is being raised in the woods is cuz of the civil war, the Sheikah are implied to have died out during the same conflict, and well its said that Hyrule was unified during it
Civil War yet the translators use unified the country like it WASNT under a sole ruler before? Hello? I need to go back through the Japanese script for the game again to see if i missed something of the game and freak it harder. And do realize the Deku sprout in this screenshot says fierce war but every where else, including the Zelda wiki (not fandom) its CIVIL War.
The Gate to Death mountain and Simultaniously the fence at Zora's river gives us and idea that peace was....tenuous at best downright hostile at worse given relations with the Gerudo
so today we gonna do some fun comparing and contrasting the Gorons and how they are treated in OoT to TP
and we gonna start with his racist ass BHJBHDBHKCJW
I mean, damn remmeber how mad Darunia is at Link for being the supposed royal family messenger? Link Unlocking the door to Darunia's room with Zelda's lullaby, I think it's a little funny that Darunia is hung up , you know, like he knows this is some disrespectful shit
Hey wannna hear some shit? The gates at the edge of death mountain aren't guarded by Gorons and were not built by them you can tell, the only way to visit the mountain is to get permission from the King to go up and not from the people that actually live there
God and like, there is something about the way Darunia locks himself in his room, like he does it to keep the ruby safe from all the other Gorons being so hungry that he's frightened they're gonna eat it, he doesn't know what to do on how to act about the Dodongos that Ganondorf summon on him for not giving over that rock. It qlmost sounds like when Ganondorf came in and Threatened Darunia, and that he (Darunia) sent a message to the royal family asking for help, why else would he be expecting someone to come meet with him?
"If I'm not mistaken, you came out here to eat the red stone too! Well, too bad! It's not here! What? That's not why you're here? You're looking for a "Spiritual Stone?" You must mean that delicious-looking red stone that was once displayed above the city! I was so hungry that I thought it would be OK to just give it one tiny, little lick...so I snuck up there. But it was already gone! I think Big Brother took it away. He always says that everyone is after that red stone! Big Brother has shut himself up in his room saying, "I will wait in here for the Royal Family's messenger!" this is a quote from the Goron that you can find on the middle of the rope bridge thing in Goron city.
Yeah so he sent a letter or something and no one answered yeesh.
contrast this all with TP where OH LOOKS WHO'S GUARDING DEATH MOUNTAIN
so in TP spoilers, this happens
Kakariko is more connected then ever! Renado here is wondering what the hell is going on with their FRIENDS. And yeah the Goron elder Gor Coron is trying to keep the last few people from kakariko left safe, and other Gorons, i mean, theyre keeping a piece of the fused shadow in there. also the way that entry into the temple goes in this game is cute, Darunia was freaking it cuz everyone is starving, but here Link wrestles his way up a mountain to ask the Gron elder whats happening since he was asked to come here by Renado, Gor Coron goes DAMN
unless......?
IDK ITS LIKE? ITS SILLY? Idk Hyrule isnt the best place but why try and act like this doesnt happen during TP?
so where am i getting at with this? the hell was going on back during OoT? If things are so odd and weirdly tense with the gates gaurds and non responses
"As time passed, the Triforce became a legend, and the different people of Hyrule forgot the laws and wisdom that the goddesses had left behind. Warfare and strife became common in Hyrule, as the armies of the Zora marched on the Hylians. The Gorons fought the Gerudo. It seemed every race of Hyrule was at the other's throat. Only the secluded Kokiri, sheltered by their magical forest and the Great Deku Tree, were spared the destruction of Hyrule's civil wars.
After 50 years of ceaseless combat, there arose a Hylian King of great wisdom, courage and power. Through his brilliant military campaigns and wise diplomacy, he was able to bring the varied people of Hyrule into a tenuous harmony. Treaties of peace were signed, and prosperity once again seemed to bloom in Hyrule. But no sooner had people declared peace in Hyrule than trouble once again stalked the land."
Tenuous Harmony, could you imagine if they dropped a line like this in Creating a champion? The tumblr side of the fandom would go fucking nuts with that info like OHHHHH SHIT WAS GOING ONNNNNN
This was ALL on the offical Nintendo Zelda website back when oot was the big game out, we have this cuz someone saved it to the wayback, THIS SCREENSHOT WAS FROM DECEMBER 14TH 2001, ABOUT A FULL YEAR AND A DAY UNTIL WIND WAKER WAS RELEASED IN JAPAN. THAT'S INSANE RIGHT???? ‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
And then it all probably got deleted once wind waker became the new thing!!! Or when they wanted to modernize and deleted it!!! THAT SUCKS RIGHT????
And what's worse is that it introduces some new info and also clarifies something. Hey you know when I made that post like damn Darunia racist as hell
"Warfare and strife became common in Hyrule, as the armies of the Zora marched on the Hylians. The Gorons fought the Gerudo."
NO WHERE IN THE GAME THE LEGEND OF ZELDA OCARINA OF TIME IT SAYS THIS, IT DOES NOT STATE THERE WAS CONFLICT BETWEEN THE GORONS AND GERUDO.....LIKE DIN GET YA KIDS.....IM LOOKING EVERYWHERE FOR SOMETHING I MUST OF MISSED.
But Like oh hey a fucking explanation to why he just fucking says that, I figure it was cuz of Ganondorf trying to almond mom all of them or that he kept talking to the King and well.....Navi already showed the GENERAL reaction to the Gerudo in castle town.
it went from oh hes just racist to dARUNIA AND GANONDORF HAVE HISTORY????
But the interesting one is why did thy Zora "marched on the Hylians."
Like sitting here like, I know a comic made in Germany shouldn't be a be all end all in shit I knew it never was and it would like. If you put this in warrior cats canonicoty categorization would be considered lower down supplementary material dubious canon, but their are things in the comic AND the Himekawa manga that behinds some behind the scenes actions given that LINK'S MOM HAS A MOSTLY CONSISTENT DESIGN WHAT THE HELLLLLLLL. And I always thought the Goron Zora war thing was stupid but Nintendo then had that out on their website, what the hell was going ON.
Because idk i didnt think much of Zora De Bon XVI and the Hyrulien King's relationship but
Now a days the Zelda website is much different and does not have lore pages like this anymore, it's more like a summary of the timeline. But yeah actually Nintendo approved shit, Hylian/Zora war.
Hyrule is progressing, its just going slowly, Hyrule is not AS stifled by its monarchy or a lack of integration during TP because Hyrule IS integrating, is people's are intermingling like is hasn't before during this game.
And this isn't even to get started on the E3 demo of Twilight princess that the trip that Link is supposed to take at the beginning of the game was to be the representative of Ordon at the "Hyrule summit
and Hyrule is described in a VERY specific way
Kingdom of Hyrule and neighboring realms? like theyre all not under the crown? so like???? FUN, that didn't end up making it in the game. the dailouge that is, But the remints is still there in the way the game is made up, like how OoT is built off is civil war bones
actually funny, Navi just got me screenshots of the way the dialouge was changed here
Like stuff clearly changed during the demo and finished game, I should of been touching more on the intricacies of how like shit was just change for no reason sometimes but uh....
But maybe @rawliverandgoronspice would want to one day like about games industry stuff if you ever want to 😭 I know you're super passionate on this and I wish I like even off hand mentioned something about how like TP is also effected by how games are made but I didn't and I'm a fool but games are complicated as hell and that post you made talking a bit about it was fun ya know 👉👈 and the Beta of Tp changes a LOT of stuff, one Rusl really is like a brother to link in the way he messes with him, it actually makes some weird Nintendo licensed shit saying hes like a big brother to Link made WAYYYYY more since with the Beta in mind, but....that also mean they tried to keep the big bro vibes....but then put the dad ones in there too like.....uh...did..someone not change his summary anywhere?
that was my big thing i wanted to talk about, navi's already touched on everything else i just think the parallels here between the Goron quest between OoT and TP changes in such a nice way.
And like this doesn't get into other shit about TP, like if we wanna deep dive into shit ya don't gotta do it by twisting the story, like I was going and talking to @blackautmedia to ask with some help when it came to like.......god idk what i even said anymore i was going a mile a minute. He wants to write his own thing on Twilight princess so im not gonna step on his toes but he has recommended Arabs and Muslims in the Media: Race and Representation after 9/11 by Evelyn Alsultany, the link I provided here is too her website and her page on the book this link here is from her own site that has a pdf of a part American Quarterly with a paper by the same name.
Anyways i wanna reflex for a moment cuz ive been up for hours finishing this because my brain wont stop unless i do. But the thing that by all means started this, was not your reblog linking me and Navi to your essay, or that there is 2 versions i found out where the paper published one had a lot more context to why you wrote your tumblr post the way you did, Navi helped me get the parts that were cut, please realize removing these does not remove the sentiment from the essay, its baked in.
fanfic, its a popular Fan interpretation that there was fighting between the Gerudo and Hylians after Ganondorf was caught trying to take the triforce, but this is not stated to of happened in the lore itself or even has evidence to back it up other then the Implications of Arbiter's grounds theory
UGHHHH AND THIS AGAIN "Twilight Princess Delivers a subtle yet poignant protest against neoliberal discourses of empire reflected in the rhetoric of heroism inform the geopolitical movements of Japan throught the twentieth century"
WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING TALKING ABOUT......
i dont mean this in a stupid ass way, im saying where the hell was about the protest thing, wait i really shouldt take from the published one cuz you actually dumbed down the line for tumblr
anyways again, where, Navi made it clear enough with her own post that, no, the way that Ganondorf is animated has no sympathy for him until the light is literally leaving him. Hell Twilight princess inst very kind to the gerudo either given that the only thing said about them is that they were thieves and nothing more. Like somehow OoT is more empathetic to the Gerudo, it doesn't just call them thieves, it aint great its not even good its just a bad portrayal of a people, and yet somehow OoT is willing to show the Gerudo in a neutral light at points then TP ever did.
but the reason i decided to just throw down a post is cuz i was pissed that you went after Ezlo for reblogging ME and NAVI's posts and purposefully misunderstood their fuckin wind waker post about ZELDA YOUTUBERS
dude you had them getting genuinely harassed by people with 0 reading comprehension that thinks a snarky reply to a tumblr post means its 100% correct. Webbed. Site.
anyways, I hope people don't take this as a right or wrong way to interpret a piece of work, as stated before, I read your essay, navi read your essay, you changed parts of Twilight Princess to get to the conclusion of you paper...And im gonna be real but it's kinda crazy that you're using post colonial melancholia for this when it's got some.....well something like idk i need someone to do a full ass review because there are point where i gently raise an eyebrow im gonna be real. but also like
like how do you read his book and then miss out on this, one of your whole big aruments is that hyrule is stagnate and not multi cultural and i had to grab screenshots and Navi had to get shit from the game.
like damn, do yall ever uh feel a strange sadness when dusk falls? i do. Idk this is one of the first and last times Nintendo ever delt with Ganondorf with some form a sympathy for him, cuz we got the dragon explosion in totk its like oh he's turbo evil now and he exploded you exploded him and yet the Gerudo probably still gotta pay for his shit from a billion years ago anyways idk idk idk pot shots at totk again.
I know you dug around a little for that post, and I understand from the numerous people that dmed me about that, you probably went on making an essay on their post so you could sound smart again.
And to be clear, I was told to drop some shit i was about to say about you because no one wants to start fandom drama, neither do I truly and any jab on the post itself would just be rude. people change and some people only learn to shut the hell up, so we'll keep it at that. I just hope you really don't truly recognize some of these people you started shit with.
So yeah tldr, uh.....idk, im going in for an autism screening in a month
also me watching the ending to windwaker cuz i wanted to say something about stong endings TP fans im sorry But Wind waker's ending hits no matter what best sequal to OoT thats isnt Majora's mask
The History of Light and Shadow
At the end of Twilight Princess, Ganondorf delivers one of his most memorable lines, “The history of light and shadow will be written in blood.” He is not wrong. As the player has witnessed over the course of Link’s adventure, Hyrule is haunted by ruins and ghost towns, a mere shadow of what it once was. The landscape is filled with numerous sites of past violence and empty spaces visibly marked by decay and wasted potential.
When Zelda tells Link and Midna that “these dark times are the result of our deeds,” she is referring to specific historical acts of imperialistic aggression. Hyrule established hegemony over its outlying territories by crushing the rebellions against its advances, but the kingdom has suffered from cultural stagnation as a result. Without the dynamic diversity symbolized by Ganondorf, Hyrule finds itself in economic and political decline, isolated from any contact with the world beyond its shrinking borders.
As a representative of a marginalized group of people who have been attacked and driven from their homes, Ganondorf is a tangible manifestation of the horrors of imperialism. He must be defeated, but doing so does not address the underlying problems that have resulted in Hyrule’s decline. I therefore want to argue that Twilight Princess uses Ganondorf to deliver a subtle yet poignant protest against the discourses of empire reflected by the dualistic “light and shadow” rhetoric of heroism that has resulted in tragedy and regret.
Keep reading
#oughhhhhh#oghhnkn eepy time yeah never agian#i have a whole thing about the triforce i wanted to say all this shit because of corruption and power but im so tired and ucked up what if#draw like crazy tomorrow or something like oh hbhbgb but uhhhhhh anyways anyways#now that i dont ffeel like i goot wAIT THE CHAINS BREAKING MAMA DIDNT RAISE A QUITTER#but like idk i dont like fightig or anything online i was just so??????????????? when Ezlo got hit for no reason like hi dont do that they#werent apart of this like#idk maybe im just a little venomus rn too but i also uh....would not be mkaing repeat posts where you wax academic about post colonial#ghosts but can reblog more then 8 posts for palestine in over a year??? like thats mean to say but with the context of Ori....#yeesh#idk bad look. there are real people to care about and this is why i dont wanna do internet discourse no more#its just stupid as hell and i have become SOOOOO normal#god lets hope i didnt eave lose ends i look ill rn ive been up over uh..........36 hours for some ungodley reason#wasnt even writing this the whole time i was clotecting eggs and laying down some diatematious earth for these birds#oh and then i get like.....IM GONN DRAW GANONDORF#I GOT AN ASK ABOUT HIM AND HES BEEN ROTATING IN MY HEAAADDDDDD#OOOOOOOO DORFFYDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO#Anyways back to my shit i will hopefull never be this mean again because its fucking exausting#but like bunch of dudes in your dms like LOOK AT THIS and you go oh YEESH i am so sorry i was a teen when that happened#well anyways im gonna be doing my little tasks and stuff tomorrow cuz#AS I SAID THE CHAINS! I CAN FINALLY KRILL MYSELF (srimp dinner)#one of these days i need to designn this fursona i have in my head and post it#i got so many things to dooooooooo and yet#alright well that was a waste of time#maybe ill come back to this and point at myself like you should of grabbed sunset perril by the throat about the wold cock thing#okay it was average it wasnt even Terato i wanted to SCREAM#this is not normal right? dude come on get weird with that shit#oh shit i should play bloodborne agAIN WAIT IS ELDENRING CO OP A THING#oh i would FUCK SO SEVERLY IN THERE#I May get webfishing soon but after i do some stuff
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#perhaps i should go to bed Early tonight#as in rn#before midnight even#idk im feeling.... off#and we wont be going back home until next Thursday#id really rather not have a meltdown in front of my friend and her parents lol#i wanna draw or write or SOMETHING but idk what#and i also feel like shit and i *am* tired#i wish i had my cat to cuddle#idk idk idk i just feel like... like...#ugh#i wish i could remove myself from my own body#it feels so ill fitting rn I hate it#fox thoughts#☉#tbd
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cant stop thinkin bout charles and erik readin together on the couch but instead of reading with him charles is listening to eriks thoughts while he reads. Live mind commentary ……..
#xmen#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#snap chats#the rare time i post an idea of mine only because i really cant think of a way id draw this#usually i hoard my ideas cause i like surprising you guys but this aint really one i feel like drawing so. For You my friends#like i COULD but. idk just isnt particularly something im itching to draw it just seems cute#but anyways no chat let me cook alright hear me out cause i talk in my brain all the time while i read#sometimes i stop reading just to think about a bit i read yeah#i want charles to listen in on all of eriks side comments or observations he makes while reading something#like if he wanted to charles could read the whole book in less than five minutes- maybe shorter than that#and that aint fun that aint cool …. so time for Audible: Husband Edition. With Commentary#ITD BE SO COZY just hangin out by the fireplace …. maybe its snowin outisde … if snow even exists anymore atp#a light fire cracklin and the study SEEMS totally quiet otherwise and yet…..#charles has been locked in to erik’s off-the-cuff literary analysis and mild comments for the past twenty minutes. its simple but its bliss#charles doesnt have to worry about being seen as invasive .. he doesnt have to suppress his powers …#the rare occasion erik lets charles into his mind for somethin so innocent .. ive made myself sick i fear#see now i wanna try writing a fic but 1.) have written in years 2.) id have to really think hard on how erik would commentate on a book#hm…… actually i do wonder what erik’s commentary on The Fable of the Bees would be …..#IN ANY CASE. maybe - at the very least- i can draw cherik by the fireplce someday ….#thatd be cute … hm …. depends on if i get in the mood for it down the line#anyways i have to drive back to my dorm !!! boo !!!! so good night everyone !!!!!
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“Of course you have an Other Brother,” he says, waving off her denial as he opens some nearby cabinets. “Who else would I be if I wasn’t?”
Small WIP sketch of the Other Brother from IDKSomethingClever99’s fic “Mari in the Pink Palace”!!! OMORI and Coraline are my two biggest interests ever so this fic was like winning the lottery for me. Not to mention how good it is… please go read it ragh
#omori#omori au#omori sunny#coraline#this fic cured my artblock and writing block partially too is there anything it can’t do#Idksomethingclever99 what are you PUTTING in this thing it’s like a drug in the best way possible#Anyway this is a really lazy and terrible other brother design… I had so many other ideas for his outfit#I had wanted to keep the bug motifs the other mother has in her outfit as well as referencing the recital#Cause. You know#mari’s perfect world#Where he gets good at the violin lmao…#But I got lazy so here was a very simplified design I made#Fingers yearned for rest couldn’t draw complicated ideas I had…#Anyways anyways love this fic#So much#god#i fucking love how mewo is portrayed too#She’s like a weary mother trying to give some tough love to her kids landkrk#She’s such an asshole but I say that affectionately#Not to mention the fact that she didn’t info dump like the cat did in coralline to mari because she was more focused on getting her home-#-and safe from the beldam than actually telling her what he was doing… christttt#And yes I will still call him the beldam#Them??? Idk djdjdjej#I also love how all the other friends are gahhhh… I can’t WAIT to see their other forms when mari’s getting the eyes#Fun fact this drawing was originally meant to be a redraw of that one scene with the cocobugs#Since it’s super pretty and I wanted to draw it#But it’s not in the fic yet (next chapter I think?) and the author takes a lot of creative liberties which I LOVE so I wanna read the scene#First before attempting to draw it#But I really hope they lean into the uncanniness of Sunny of all people surrounding himself with bug imagery#Since that goes against what mari knows about him a LOT and will further cement that something is NOT RIGHT with this guy
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what if i snapped and made an oc carrd
#i mean.... i could#this isnt the first time ive thought of doing it but i drop ocs so easily its not even funny. so idk if itd be worth it#id consider toyhouse or smth but i dont have money lol. right now everythings on artfight but thats more for drawing purposes#what ocs would i even talk abt... i have some standalones like auggie and ocs i think look cool but dont plan on using#but some others have their own stories.. not like a huge thought out plot but something i pick up and twirl around in my head#like luckys whole deal is being a hiking guide who accidentally gets tied up with some werewolves pretending to be a hiking group to eat pp#and then i have the magician rivals. although i kinda wanna tie theirs with the nightguard and thief story ive been cooking. maybe in the#same universe? it would be pretty funny if they lived in the same apartment complex since a couple stories i have in mind revolve around th#its like some sort of omnibus or anthology to me. kicks my feet#and then fan characters like xin ya and sleight who i want to have their own expanded lore and stuff. i think that would be cool#im making crow a powerpoint of xins updated lore but the assignmence are making it hard. hopefully it turns out good though#i have a hard time writing personality and xins is always the hardest bc theyre probably the least like me. i tend to stick to#characters similar to myself to get in their head. but bc their backstory affects their personality so strongly i have to do some thinking#anyway. hopefully i remember this later#yapping#oc#oc talk#ive also been playing neko atsume recently for nostalgia and why did we as a society ever stop playing it. its so chill#you just take pictures of silly little cats and leave them silly little toys and treats. and the music is cute
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testing out a new style of rendering with this guy
#sud#sud atla#sud avatar#atla#me art#im love him#im not sure how much i like it but by god did i need the practice#ive been so busy lately it was kinda nice to wind down with a doodle for an evening for once lol#im at a weird place with my art (<- guy who’s been at a weird place with her art for the past few years)#I don’t like how my lineart looks no matter what I do and I wanna do more lineless but idk if I just don’t have the patience for it or what#ill figure it out. maybe#something something killing mydelf to forever change the trajectory (real?)#there’s less and less for me to do at work and the terms almost done n ill have a few days in between before i start my new one so hopefully#that means drawing time! if not hopefully writing#i have too many wips dawg 😭#oops these tags got out of control lmfao#too bad!!
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it's honestly so relieving to realize what you were missing for your creative projects no matter how dumb and obvious you think it should have been
#recently realized i should be thinking of my writing in a summary like what happens this chapter and such#instead of trying to shove my characters into a void and have them robotically go through the motions necessary to get them to the plot#like it's so obvious i should have them feel like they're doing things instead of just following the plot#the characters make the plot move to them not the other way around#idk if i'm explaining it well but yeah#the characters decide what they want to do on their own and i move the plot around their decisions#the major plot points and all are set already i just move them around what the characters are doing#also recently i learned how to draw birds kinda!#learning how beaks work with my style and such#bc i was trying something weird before but now it actually looks nice and i can actually be proud of my progress#so expect martlet sometime maybe#bc martlet is. one of the characters of all time#also a secret other character that i wanna talk about but not yet#not until i've finished a good sketch of them and publish it#i can say tho. undertale related
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Hi @pokemon-ash-aus, I hope you don't mind I borrowed Peach, yes I put her in situations sorry, I think she had a good time though. This was basically my first thought since the plushie ask and you mentioning she'd be anxious with it out and about as an easy bullying target, I took creative liberties like assuming she went to college to get her Pokémon Professor degree because like idk if she did or just went I'm a Professor now binch. Enjoy!
Plushies and Public Transport
Peach couldn't help nervously glancing around, the plush that had been a comfort was slowly becoming a source of anxiety and discomfort as she held the soft charmander in her crossed arms close to her chest. She had already been a bit concerned about going out to such a crowded place in her human disguise, she squeezed the plush in her arms and was glad it didn't have a squeaker inside.
It was a bit odd walking with her feet rather than floating and she really really didn't want to have to do any mouth speaking trying to fake it where she could and use telepathy instead. Her eyes glanced around at the sounds of chattering, did she hear someone say charmander? She wasn't, sure if she was imagining judgment or if people were talking about her. She was glad the plushy was well built because with how hard she was squeezing it to her body for some sense of comfort and soothing she was surprised the head hadn't popped off comedically to make her even more of a spectacle to these people.
She sat on a bench taking off her backpack and holding it to her side while sighing to herself, she could do this all she had to do was make it through these first few commutes and she's sure the anxiety of it all would be non existent and she'd wonder what she was ever stressed about. She watched the feet shuffle past her, the chattering of many people and some thoughts managing to be so loud she couldn't block them out were starting to make her head hurt and an uncomfortable sensation grow in her chest.
She focused on breathing, in through your nose out through your mouth or something like that her exhale passing through her gritted teeth as she attempted to calm. She heard the footsteps before she saw them, a pair of well made proper looking brown shoes stopped in front of her and Peach screwed her eyes closed tight ready for some kind of mocking question.
Slowly lifting her head she quirked an eyebrow and blinked several times in confusion at the sight of another teenager about 'her' age (according to the disguise she was using), hiding their face, poorly, behind a small Spritzee, no wait, it was a plush Spritzee judging by the button eyes the slightly misshapen head fluff and how limp the wings were. Peach blinked once more as she noticed the movement of the others legs, seeing them anxiously shuffle on the spot as their hands gently held the plushies' wings and moved them for emphasis as they spoke.
"Um, excuse me but this dolt was perhaps wondering if she was at the right terminal to get the train to the professor learning academy?" Though they moved the plush for emphasis of the plush speaking rather than themselves Peach could see that she was avoiding eye contact rather heavily.
"...ah…" Peach's voice was very quiet, more of an exhale than speech so thankfully she didn't stutter but, as she looked at this other person likely another student starting this segment of their life watching them use the plush for comfort and as a speaking aid it seemed Peach felt a little chunk of speech anxiety chip away.
She, with slight reluctance, confirmed that they were at the right spot, trying not to show her discomfort at her stuttering or how her lisp affected her words and she watched the others shoulders drop in relief, clearly having been quite tense, though still holding the plush up to hide their face as they sighed and thanked her.
Peach gave an awkward unsure smile, she hadn't been planning for anyone to actually speak to her, other than the ticket master or the person at the ticket booth, so despite the feeling of weird anxiety over something out of script happening it wasn't necessarily unpleasant either, the interaction could've been much worse after all…
They bowed in thanks to her despite already verbally thanking her before watching them look around their hands gently squeezing their plush for comfort as Peach in turn squeezed the soft charmander a bit closer.
"Do, do, do you want to s-s-sit here?" Peach didn't like how her mouth struggled for words or how it emphasized her lisp but something about this individual made her feel a bit more comfortable in her own voice. They nodded through the plush and as Peach shuffled a bit to the side to make room they sat down besides her to wait for their train together. Peach glanced over and assumed by the looks of them and context clues they were also just starting their education just like her.
She did feel a bit rude side glancing at them but she was a bit curious, why did they talk to her of all people? She could spot a few other people who looked like they would have been heading the same way so why speak to her. She noticed as well they kept the plushie up to their face, and after a few moments she was certain she heard them make a quiet chirping sound. Peach blinked but, well they didn't comment on her lisp.
"I'm honestly really glad I spotted you," Peach glanced over again they weren't looking at her she could see their hands softly squeezing the plushie likely in self soothing, "I, was kind of worried I'd have to speak to one of those guys over there," she gestured with the Spritzee plush casually and Peach glanced over at the other group of people she had spotted who must were likely going the same way as them. Her bench companion made a little clicking noise, reminding her of chittering chattering bug types.
"But then I saw you, and you had a plushie too!" Peach held the charmander plush a bit closer at it being mentioned, feeling a wave of defensiveness run through her ready to hiss and defend herself from cruel remarks, "and I thought, hey! That, that looks like someone who I could trust," the tension in Peachs shoulders stopped rising and slowly subsided as she looked over to the other again, "cause well, I don't know anybody but if you have a plushie and I have a plushie then well maybe i'd be okay if I asked you. Plus it makes me feel a bit less anxious too.." They glanced over at Peach with an eye behind her plush and she watched them give an anxious smile before moving the plush to hide once more.
"Sorry! I'm bad at looking at people."
"It's ok-o-okay," Peach reassured, if a bit awkwardly as her fingers gently brushed the fluff of her charmander plush. Maybe it hadn't been such a bad idea to bring them after all.
They sat in quiet for a bit more as they waited, the sound of the daily commute around them, the other inquiring where Peach bought her plush and Peach very proudly telling them it was in fact made by her brother. Her companion seemed impressed and mentioned her brother must have been quite talented, telling Peach that her mother made her plushie for her to help with her anxiety and that it had a button on the back to open it up to fit in a pouch of scents, saying that at the moment it had a pouch of lavender in because it's meant to be quite soothing which is why she keeps holding it to her face. Peach made an understanding 'ahh', smiling a bit as they chatted, the other even offering to let Peach have a hold and smell of the lavender which even though it wasn't said she could tell that this other person must have trusted her a considerable amount.
The lavender scent was present but not overwhelming and Peach sighed softly at the comforting aroma before carefully handing the no doubt prized possession back to its original owner. They exchanged the names given to their respective plushies with the other having named their Spritzee after the person who first recorded the species and learnt how to use their aromas for perfumes which was incredibly fitting and Peach could only nod her head in approval trying not to vibrate with the fact she knew MUCH about how the aroma was made in the Pokémon body.
Of course the other casually mentioned a did you know fact about the Spritzee and Aromatisse line and the floodgates of knowledge absolutely spilled open as Peach enthusiastically began her deep dive into the history and biology of these scented Pokémon.
Even though her companion seemed to gape at Peach in confusion, when she faltered in her confidence they very quickly jumped in with, "no please keep talking!" And with newfound confidence and assurance she continued her knowledgeable rant with the other nodding along fascinated but mentioning that she couldn't even add anything because Peach was so well knowledged she was amazed.
As they got on the train Peach had managed to go from the scent of the Spritzee line to the Salandit line and it's aromas and how they're created and engineered to be perfume and as they arrived at their stop she spoke with great enthusiasm about the Muk scandal and how it's scent when processed the right way could ALSO be made into a irresistible perfume! And did you know it is said the Oricorio line also have distinct scents along with looks and typing and it's believed that that was caused by the same flower nectar they consumed to change form and type! Her companion did in fact not know this.
Peach more proudly held her comfort plush to her as they walked the hallways to the meeting hall and did notice dotted around more people with their own plushies of different Pokémon, and perhaps bringing her charmander along hadn't been such a bad idea after all.
#My writing#Not my oc#@pokemon-ash-aus oc#@pokemon-ash-aus Peach#Peach can have an infodump as a treat#I just thought the idea of someone else also having a plush and seeing Peach with one and thinking that she's safe to approach was sweet#And you know what Pokémon professors are fucking nerds you know damn well others probably have loads of plushies too#I say teenager in this fic but like idk when they'd start learning this shit I assume at like 18/19 so older teen#Peach can make a friend as a treat#I tried not to write too much actually spoken dialogue for Peach cause I didn't wanna misrepresent her stutter and lisp#Hence her mostly speaking in descriptive paragraphs#Also Peach can be something that's so autism coded whoops sorry I gave her slight overstimulation from all the noise#Also random other student can ALSO be something that's so autism coded#Honestly this was fun to write because I knew I probably wouldn't be able to draw it#But plz enjoy Peach making a fren#I realised I probably should've asked and checked it was okay to write using your oc I'm sorry
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mmm... scribbling is not in the cards today it seems...
#it may be due to the fact that i havent slept and its almost 2 pm and im Very Quickly Ascending From This Plane#sluggishly sobbing and clawing at my tablet. im in a laughingstock mood#i want to draw them... being soft... being silly... being#my attempts are Not Working#fine! ill. idk what ill do. rot ig#its a rotting day#WAIT NO FUCK ILL FINISH MY PALTRY RESUME#ugh but i dont wanna do my resume. i wanna doodle laughingstock#SOOOOOO many thoughts about them#many emotions#much feeling. yes.#absolutely unprompted#and i wanted to finish up that comm... and do that other thing for my buddy....#ill do it when i inevitably wake up at 3 am after falling asleep at 9#gonna do my resume... see if i have any asks i can answer without an added Scribble... maybe write something idk...#ive been saying 'im gonna write' for two months now. one day it wont be a lie#*gazes longingly at my dc wips. and that one snufkin wip.*#well we can subside off of the queue for a day or two longer#plany of thyme to get my shit Together and continue the outfit asks#theyre gonna be posted slowly since i want to group them as much as possible#except todays. todays is its own thing bc i went a little Ham with it#yall will see in about an hour#now if you'll excuse me im gonna grab the pickle jar and stare into the middle distance for the next thirty minutes
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tbh tho i think my art is fugly af LMFAO
#not in a '>w< eeeek! i wish i could drawww 🥺 i can only cobble such measle crap with my lowly peasant paws.. *unveils mona lisa*'#sense but like a my style makes me want to hurl whenever i look at it bcs it's a constant reminder that it can only be what i can make it be#and bcs it looks bad to me then that means i cant make things look good if u get my sense like#idk man 😭!! im just sick of being scribbly!! and not clean! i wanna ink my art! have crisp lines! dark lines!!#not have to put stupid darkening filters on everything bcs i cant color or shade so my art is just stuck with the blinding white background#well the frustration is more how i CAN color and shade.. i CAN ink my lines with a darker one#lets not excuse my laziness now cmon ted omg dumbass bitch#it's just that doing so makes me . crazy#my attention span like. crumbles when i try to add color or ink over lines bcs thats Such a commitment to me#i HATE leaving things unfinished when it seems so monumental#like unfinished sketches or prompts? fine. those are sketches. little prompts. even if u post it it's shit#but starting big things is a COMMITMENT.. with CONSEQUENCES ! ! i just want to avoid them ig#it's like im stuck between art being a fun lil past time and being a perfectionist actually so no. no it is not#but also i NEED to draw i NEED to write SOMETHING! SOMETHING!! then i realize the weight of things and purposefully hinder myself#then later hate myself for hindering even tho it felt so good and right in the beginning ORGHH or WHATEVER#idk one of my friends told me my style reminded them of the new tmnt movie (which has been praised yeah#for like beautiful ugliness tho) and like. i KNOW it's a compliment... but. why did it make me Feel 😭 like i wanted to rip my art 2 shreds#once i lined my art and my friend (an artist i admire) said smthin like 'omg finally! ted lined art! gorgeous!'#& i KNOW. I KNOW IT'S A COMPLIMENT. BUT WHY AM I THINKING LIKE. SO VIOLENT. NOT ABT THEM. BUT MY SHIT NOW#like UGHHH i just HATE feeling trapped and helpless when actually theres help available but im just DUM!! JUST LINE UR ART TED#art is like playing sport is like making good grades is like working well is like being a good friend is like being a good person#literally. just be GOOD.#it's all a performance to me ARGHARGH! I HATE THE JOKER! I HATE BEING CRINGE@! RAGGHH I HATE THIS SHIT#<- mfs when no basketball#mfw i cannot avoid enlightenment via the meaningless distractions i codepently craveRAGGHG!!!!!!1!
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As a treat tomorrow for finishing my first exam in second year I’m gonna either doodle, OR! Finish writing the cute kiyazan thing I started a while ago
#kiyazan makes me want to write#but it’s bc Kiki’s head is v easy for me to inhabit#Cals thoughts are such a mystery fhskdhsks#nd I don’t think I’d do didi justice unfortunately#but I do kinda wanna write something for them from exileverse#sometimes writing is nicer to me than drawing#words fight back but in a different way than drawing#and I know that what I need to do for drawing rn is some sort of facial construction studies#bc I think that’s the thing that’s bothering me most ab my art#but idk how to approach it :/#rambling#anyway I’m excited#also excited ab the idea of writing exile caledith#like#idk smthn ab it
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i always get invested in the fandoms that are either dead or dying but man looking back on some of the fandoms i got into when they were still alive makes me nostalgic,,,,
i don't have the time or energy to do much of anything anymore outside of when a hyperfixation hits me but there are some special anime/stories to me i will never let go of even if im like 99% the fandom is gone or very rarely active
#i wanna revive those fandoms by making writing pieces for them#but also i have the worst case of executive dysfunction that idk how to fix#so it's best for me to just focus on OC works instead with what little focus i have OTL#cue me struggling the entire day to write/draw something and losing interest in doing so :'>#now that ive consumed everything TME related i can feel myself burning out again and going back to that depressive state lol#i wanna create stories like ive seen so many other people do but then i feel depressed about doing so and it's A Cycle TM
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i have work 6 days in a row this week and i'm so mad about it (see just how mad in my paragraph's worth of tags!)
#i had a short shift today so i was gonna draw or write something but i just. brainrotted at my computer#i opened today and closed last night :')) i'm out here just existing ig#i'm so tired but i wanna write/draw so bad#esp because i start school again next week and probably won't be able to as often as id like#hopefully i won't keep working 5-6 days a week so i can have time for school and art/writing stuff#i'm only supposed to be 3-4 days a week so idk what's going on#i worked 6 days straight last week too 💀#i'm ready to fall over you guys#all this for just minimum wage too 😔💔#amori rambles
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i need to walk into a field and just sit for for a while.. maybe forever hbfsh...
#just me hi#turns out my brother and i share a lot of views on stuff hfbvshvfha#he was spamming me on discord the other day and i forgot to read them up til now lol#/the world has always been like this...#it's something after something after something. and horrible things may be steadfast but i think we forget about the general constant of#kindness#and why are we surprised it's there? we'll see pictures or videos of people who are not too long ago gone and be pleasantly surprised at th#joy that's found there#who said we didn't used to laugh?#forgetting the good is easy i guess. i get that hfhsvh#idk. i'm putting exploding pngs over some people's faces khfvjhvsbh :)#//anywho aside from that i think i'm gonna writeee#ik i said that earlier and i Did forget. but maybe this time i've got it hfbvhs#or nooot cuz i wanna watch a show too... oh the decisions lol.... :3#nom nom nom....#i also wanna draw smth i think.. or maybe i just Really wanna write cuz i need to get some character stuff out NOW hfhs#questions questions!!#guess i'll go see what i'll do about that now :3#.maybe the cowboy au.. cowboy au my beloved....#still tryna figure out what would be the Big Problem there hfhvs#cuz i want it to be more historical fiction than fantasy.. hmmm....#cults are a classic! always fun lol :>#or maybe cattle theft.. hmmmmm..!!#well i'd better get on it hfhs#toodles ciao :D
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the temptation to start a dawn au askblog grows ever stronger
#cause like. both b&l and rimecrest aus are higher priority in terms of me actually writing something about them#but i still wanna do Something with dawn#also it has a smaller primary cast than b&l and the rimecrest spinoffs (it's equal to og rimecrest)#idk though. knowing me ill mill over this for a long while#it Could be a way i could get into the habit of drawing more often though#chat what do you think
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...
#well. today was a nice day of not doing anything but drawing really. theres an au where i went to art school and am a happier person lol#except not really bc im sure my head would ruin that too. anyway. its a shame i have to return to the pain tomorrow. i have so much to grade#plus a paper to write plus data to work with. a protocol to figure out. and an exam to study for and a final project thatll kill me#god. i also have to get ready for lab Monday. christ. and what shall i say to my therapist Tuesday? well we could try to tackle the deep set#looming issue that prevents me from getting better in our tiny 50min session or i could be like listen. just fucking listen. let me give u#the case 4 and against me having adhd so i can stop feeling fucking nuts. just like give me feedback. ya kno?#it would b inattentive bc im not hyper unless im losing my mind and bordering on hyp0mania. but my focus is something i cant control#executive functioning has always been a problem but now im so worn down im in danger of actual consequences. and its not just things i dont#wanna do. im not just anxiously avoiding. i cant start tasks and stick with them. i flip back and forth and get nothing done. i spiral#sometimes for hours. im not doing anything fun im just not doing anything. frozen in anguish. i dont even wanna think abt how much money ive#lost by not filling out reimbursement sheets which arent hard to do. theyre easy i just never do them. why??? i dont fucking kno. but im not#forgetful. im thinking constantly abt these things. i just cant make them happen. theyre stuck buffering. i do have memory issues tho#my short term working memory is like that of a literal child. so i cant follow complex instructions. i constantly need new info. constantly#need sound. spoken words plus music at the same time. but the main reason i need an answer to this is the reading issue. which is that im#dyslexic but also my thoughts r like an interfering frequency. without realizing ill b thinking and not reading. its a problem no matter#what im reading. its severely disruptive. i will physically read out loud to try to hold my attention in place and still get distracted by#my own head. do u kno how frustrating it is to read something aloud 3 times and not know wtf u just read bc u arent thinking abt anything#interesting u would rsther b reading but u can't fucking pay attention long enough. genuinely if its not adhd and i cant get medication to#fix my focus issues i dont kno wtf im gonna do. im so bad at reading and its extremely frustrating. but is it just dyslexia? idk what i#described doesn't fucking seem normal or like a reading problem. sounds like a focus issue. so riddle me that#idk ive got adhd on both sides of my family plus my focus fluctuates with ny hormones plus homones possibly induce hyp0mania. like i mean#ive got other issues which make a diagnosis difficult to parse but like i feel like that's decent evidence for possibly adhd? my friend said#she was always worried she had a brain tumor before she was diagnosed. to me ive always felt like my brain is full of holes. im missing the#parts that would let it operate correctly. the frontal lobe is just fucked. ugh. i wonder how much accommodation i could get from the#disability office if i actually went to them. i wont bc im fucked up and i dont think they could actually do anything for me at this stage#but alas im curious. ugh. y do i do this to myself? i kno y but not enough time for that in 50min. bad attitude mostly. half my brain#just craves death. the other half is just trying to tread water but its hard with someone trying to drown u. so its all fucked#unrelated
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