#i wanna . cry.
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v8mpvrse · 6 months ago
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who up thinking about matthew going from being on a team that said
“it can’t be a riot every night”
to then going to a team that says shit like
“following him into battle is something we love to do”
publicly. a team that STILL loves u PUBLICLY. SO VOCALLY. a team that understands you on and off the ice. a team u never have to perform for. even while u perform for the entire world. they perform with u. they protect u. they love u. every part of u. and you love them. always.
anyways.
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thiamblogger · 7 months ago
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i just want to know if anybody else on tumblr is taking health and social in college because i am, and today we had to fix our feedback except (this isn't me bragging.. i promise.) i didn't have any, and i am literally never in lesson - i always waffle, but like maybe it's cause of all the extra explanations and definitions??
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biirdiewrites · 1 year ago
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fuck chronic illness.
fuck chronic illness.
FUCK CHRONIC ILLNESS.
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bumblingbabooshka · 3 months ago
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Vulcan teen on Vulcan [tiktok] saying "I have just lost track of my father in the grocery store." The camera turns to show the viewers the grocery store in which almost every single older middle-aged man has a bowlcut and long robes. Camera turns back to show the teen's face which is expressionless and yet communicates all it needs to.
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mallalada · 3 months ago
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get yourself a main character whos two primary emotions are "little cunt" and "catatonic with grief"
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ameba-from-space · 4 months ago
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majoringinsarcasm · 11 months ago
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DONT BE AFRAID TO COMMENT ON OLD FICS DONT BE AFRAID TO COMMENT ON FICS IN A FANDOM THE AUTHOR MAY NO LONGER BE ACTIVE IN. IF THE STORY IS STILL UP LET THEM KNOW YOUR THOUGHTS IT MIGHT JUST BE THE REMINDER THAT MAKES THEIR DAY.
SINCERELY SOMEONE WHO JUST GOT A REPLY THAT MADE ME WANNA MAKE THIS POST
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jupiterslibrary · 6 months ago
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one of the differences between good omens the show vs good omens the book that will always fuck me up is the post-bookshop fire scene. crowley goes from picking himself up, dusting himself off, accepting the loss of aziraphale and Just Driving Anyway to completely falling apart. i do get why people have gripes with it being changed so fundamentally, and i've thought about it a lot myself, but i've never been able to bring myself to get mad about it. i always circle back to how the book was written by two best friends. that drunken, wrecked, grief stricken scene was written in a post-pratchett world. he lost his best friend.
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gatoburr0 · 8 months ago
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WAAAH WAAH WAAAH WAAAHH
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spiderziege · 2 months ago
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Mordred Manor! (with close-ups under the cut)
edit: i just put up some new drawings on my ko-fi, so if you wanna print this out as a poster or something, you can find it there at full resolution in the 'Misc Art' folder! :) (personal use only!)
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nicastamatis · 9 months ago
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this is like. a missing leg kink blog. did they rb my post because i said stump.
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notastraykid · 10 months ago
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God I hope he finds the scarf.
hiya! I noticed you have your requests open and if you don't mind, could I please suggest: "for once... I was right" with "don't you dare walk away from me" for Lee Know - maybe angsty but I don't mind you just going with the flow.
thank you!
blue hour.
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pairing: minho x reader genre/warnings: exes au, exes to ...? đŸ«ą, angst; minho's pov mostly, open ending kinda, some light cursing, unedited don't look at me word count: 2.2k (i got carried away a little bit) listen to 🎧: breathe again - sara bareilles
as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡
navigation â€ș masterlist â€ș ko-fi
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“this should be the last of your things.”
“thanks,” you say, rummaging through the box that minho hands over to you. everything that you left at his place throughout the entire time you were together; every sweatshirt of yours in his closet, every piece of jewelry on his nightstand, every bottle of nail polish that you kept in his bathroom reserved for nights where you two would pamper each other. they're all here, except for... “did you see my red scarf though? i can’t find it anywhere.”
“no, i checked,” he says. “this is everything.”
“hmm, okay.”
you hold the box between your arms, and minho can’t help but feel something twist painfully in his chest. it’s like you're holding your relationship, or what’s left of it anyway, ready to make your swift exit from his life. two years of love, all dumped into one stupid cardboard box.
you both stand there in silence for what feels like forever, just staring at each other, then at your surroundings, neither of you saying anything. minho knows why he hasn’t bid you a farewell goodnight yet; it’s because he doesn’t want this to end. even though it’s a sad occasion, the finale to your story, he still wants to the seconds to stretch on, for the minutes to last longer. after all, isn’t this the last time he'll ever see you?
why you haven’t left him to his devices and gone upstairs, he isn’t sure.
another moment passes. life goes on but it seems like you two are in your own bubble where nothing moves forward. everything stays rooted to the spot.
“do you want to go for a walk?” you ask after a while. the question surprises minho enough that he lets it show, and it makes you quickly tack on an excuse. “the weather is nice and i... i don’t want to be on my own.”
yes, he does want to go for a walk with you. anything to be with you even if it’s only for a moment longer.
“sure,” he says. “let’s go for a walk.”
“okay. i’ll leave this upstairs and get my jacket.”
he watches as you disappear inside your building, only to reemerge momentarily afterward, a wool jacket draped over your frame. he wishes you’d worn something lighter, just so he could have an excuse to wrap his arm around your shoulders if it gets colder.
you walk side by side around your neighborhood, a distance between your bodies that never used to be there before. it’s strange, of course it is. but minho supposes this is yours and his new reality now.
“how are the cats?” you ask.
“they’re okay. dori had a cold a couple weeks ago, but everything’s fine now,” he tells you. “they... they miss you.”
i miss you too - that's a thought that he doesn’t say out loud, only keeps it to himself because it feels too humiliating to utter those words to you.
“they’re cats. how can you tell?”
“i can always tell.” he shrugs. “they wait by the door when i’m already home. they sleep on your-... they sleep on the other side of the bed.”
if you notice his slip up, you don’t say anything. you purse your lips and nod somberly, stuffing your hands in your pockets. “they’ll forget about me soon enough,” you say.
minho glances at you. he wants to rebuke that statement, to argue with you over something as silly as whether or not his freaking cats will retain their memories of you in the future. but he just bites his tongue and swallows down the lump in his throat, humming to let you know that he’s heard what you said. not a hum of agreement, just one of acknowledgement.
“how’s work?” he asks. god, it’s just so fucking weird to be asking you these things. you know each other inside and out and yet, you’re here making small talk.
torn apart when all you two should be is together.
“it’s alright. still the same, kinda boring. you know there’s not a lot that can happen in that place in one month.”
yes, because it’s been a little over a month since you parted ways, since you moved back into your old apartment and left his home perpetually cold and empty. he can’t blame you for leaving when he was the one who agreed to break up. he can’t blame you for his heartache when he was the one who broke your heart first.
he didn’t mean to, but isn’t that what they all say?
“do you still want to leave?”
“sure,” you reply. “if i can find something better, i’d leave that place in a heartbeat. but for now, it’ll have to do. it used to be a bit more bearable though.”
“i hope you find something that makes you happier.”
“thanks.” you give him a smile but it doesn't reach your eyes. “how about you? how’s life?”
minho almost says the first thing that comes into mind. life is terrible without you. i think about you every single minute of every day but you're not here and it’s my own damn fault.
he could lie and come up with something much more palatable, because he doesn’t reckon his truth is something you’d like to hear right now.
but he doesn’t want to lie to you. in the time that you were together, minho never lied to you, not even once, not even over something stupid and insignificant. beside, he’s got a feeling that you would see through his bullshit anyway.
his answer ends up being a sad shrug, then, “it’s life. i’m hanging in there.”
your footsteps slow until you stop completely. this makes him stop too, turning around to look at you with his head tilted to one side, confused.
“it’s not like you to sound so defeated,” you comment.
“what?” he asks with a sigh. “it’s the truth.”
“it’s not the whole truth.”
“what do you want me to say?”
“i want you to be honest with me,” you tell him, your shoulders slumping just slightly. “i still care about you. i want to know you’re okay.”
minho takes a step closer until he’s right in front of you, the closest that you two have been all night. his body feels the warmth radiating from yours but he has to ball his hands into fists to keep from reaching out and touching you.
“if you really want to know, i haven’t been myself since you left.”
guilt flashes in your eyes. it wasn’t his intention at all.
you bite your bottom lip, inhale a shaky breath, before you speak, “i’m sorry for leaving.”
“don’t apologize. i’m sorry for driving you away.”
then he watches the tears well up as you look at him. he’s been wondering this the whole night, how you seem so cavalier about it all, how you’re able to speak to him so casually as if you’re just old friends with some shared history, and not as though the wound is still fresh. he’s still bleeding and you’re acting like you’ve already healed.
but he sees it now. you’re just as sad as he is, just as miserable. the only difference is you’re better at hiding it, or maybe you’ve just had more time to get used to the way it hurts.
is this how you felt in the weeks, the months, leading up to your departure? every time he neglected you, prioritized something else over you, missed every date and overlooked every text message? every single instance where he was too busy for you?
he never wanted to break your heart, but alas, here you are.
he didn’t want you to go, and yet, when you felt like you couldn’t handle the loneliness anymore, he hadn’t stopped you from walking out the door. he gave up, and he gave up so easily.
nothing along the lines of ‘don’t you dare walk away from me’, no tearful argument, no explosive and definitive end to your relationship. minho just let your love slip away.
how must that have made you feel on top of everything that he did - or didn’t do - to you?
minho has been called every variation of ‘cold’ before. to everyone else, he’s callous, rough, intimidating and unapproachable. but to you, he’s kind, soft, gentle and loving. it never mattered what anyone thought of him, as long as you always knew that he loved you, that you saw him for who he was.
but toward the end, what if you saw him how the others did? what if you had deemed him cold too?
the mere thought makes him sick to his stomach.
you sniffle, wiping at your eyes. “you don’t have to say that. it’s in the past now.”
fracture upon fracture upon fracture. minho doesn’t know how much more of this his heart can take.
his fingers twitch, and before he can stop himself, he’s reaching for your hands. to his surprise, you let him.
your hands, so delicate in his, so warm.
“i should’ve fought harder for you,” he says, his voice so small that you barely catch the words at all.
but his eyes
 he hopes you can see it in his eyes - the regret, the longing, the pain of losing you dimming the light of the stars he holds there.
giving his hands a light squeeze, you say, “and maybe i should’ve held on tighter instead of letting go.”
“i made you feel like you weren’t enough. it’s the worst thing i ever did to you. i understand why you left.”
you try to calm your breathing, because you really don’t feel like breaking down in front of him right now. you don’t say anything in response; what are you even supposed to say? you told him everything that you wanted to the night that you two broke up. everything that you tried to bottle up for months was laid on the table that night. you watched as he listened to you, watched as his heart broke alongside yours. that was it.
“i
 i’m sorry,” minho stutters, and for the first time since you’ve known him, he looks scared. “i’m sorry. can’t we try again? i swear i won’t let you down again. i swear to you.”
“min
” the nickname slips out of habit and for a second there, minho thinks you would say yes. but then
 “i know you’re sorry. i know we didn’t break things off because we fell out of love. but i don’t think you’re at a point in your life where i can be the most important thing right now. you may not mean to, but there’ll be things that you prioritize over me
 and i’m not at a place in my life where i can settle for being on someone’s back burner either. the timing’s just off. it’s not your fault, life just got in the way.”
minho stares at you, the stars dying out one by one. the hurt is beyond what any word can describe but in a way, he understands. it fucking sucks, but he gets it. he has to accept it now.
he nods solemnly, tracing odd patterns on your palms. then he asks, quietly, “can i hold you? just for a while.”
please indulge me, he thinks. this is the last thing i’ll ever ask from you.
you don’t reply with words. instead, you wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him into you. you two stay there in each other’s embrace for god knows how long. it could’ve been minutes or it could’ve been hours. you always lose track of time when you’re wrapped up together.
you hold him like he - tough and intimidating minho - is made of glass, and he holds you like he doesn’t ever want to let you go.
but he has to eventually.
you untangle yourself from him to find that he’s been crying. the tears on his cheeks catch the light from the street lamps, reflecting like crystals in the night. when you wipe them away, you tell him, “for once, i was right.”
“about what?” he sniffles.
“you really are a hopeless romantic,” you smile, trying to lighten the mood. as much as you can anyway. “i knew you’d prove me right one day.”
minho wants to scoff but his eyes are burning from the tears and his throat feels like it's closing up, so he lets you have this one. the last one, right?
maybe he is a romantic, and maybe it’s only for you. maybe it makes him a little hopeless.
the walk back to yours ends too quickly. but truth be told, even if you had walked together until the sun came up, it still wouldn’t have been long enough for him.
you both stand there, two heavy hearts looking at each other, looking for one another.
there’s no goodbye, only goodnight.
and you’re the one who says it first.
minho returns your sentiment with a choked up voice, a brush of his fingers against yours, and when you finally turn to walk up the steps, his gaze lingers on your retreating figure.
then he calls your name softly. “hey, uhm... i’ll let you know if the scarf turns up, okay?”
you turn back with a knowing smile. it’s still sad, but there’s some faith hidden there.
“i hope it will.”
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all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 16.01.2024]
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ovium-sheep · 1 month ago
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Dying Star.
I forgot to name it properly oops!
Also I did indeed cook with this one.
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snakes-on-skates · 10 months ago
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oh god oh fuck oh no
nothin. nothin like eating an entire bag of chips in one sitting. again. despite all my eating and digestive problems. making great choices today friends
i feel so sick
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catcatb0y · 10 months ago
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I'll lay down at three am and think it's such a win I'm finally going to get to sleep at an ALMOST decent time, and then after laying down for ages, the sun is rising.
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nkogneatho · 10 months ago
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Toji has never once shown his vulnerability towards the scar he has on his lips. He never even talks about them. But you know he is somewhere insecure about it when he stops and stares in the mirror while shaving, green eyes scanning the scar. Or when he purposely rests the right side of his face in his hand so the palm hides it. He thought he was being subtle with it, but you noticed. You noticed how deep down he was scared to even talk about it, let alone wear it with pride. That scar was a nightmare and he hated how it was visible to him, to everyone in the most obvious place.
"Toji?" you cooed from behind, walking into the hall while he was watching TV.
"Yes, baby?"
"I bought a new gloss, and i want to test if it's transfer proof."
"Don't know what that is but c'mere, lovie. Sit on my lap while you do it." You smiled and plopped yourself on his lap. Before he could finally look at you, you pressed your tinted glossy lips at the end of his lips where the scar settled.
he tried opening his lips to catch yours but you didn't really kiss his lips. he was so confused why you were pecking one spot.
*one peck. two peck. three peck. smooches tightly*
"D'ya know? I love this." You ran your thumb over the skin. "It makes me realize how strong you are, Toji. Sooo strong. Please don't hide it. It makes you look more handsome." He couldn't form words. The sudden love bomb opened a can of bad memories. Yet, oddly, he was comforted by your words. For a man so big, he was still weak over you and your love. Because you determined his vulnerability. Which is why your relationship was perfect. He is not the kind of man to be vocal about his issues but you read him like an open book. You understand him before he even has to spell it out.
Toji rested his forehead against yours, inhaling and exhaling with his eyes closed. God. He feels so in love, it kills him. What would he do without you? Everyone picked his flesh till it was just his heart exposed in the dirt, still struggling to beat. But you found it. Not to pick anymore flesh(there was none left). But to rip open your ribs and keep that heart locked in you forever. Safe and sound.
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