#i told her it was scully and mulder

[wawamouse]

My sister just referred to X-Files as “the one with Scuggy and Guggy? Scuddly and Scoogler?” And I’ve been laughing for like three minutes

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

things we learn about scully in s1

she has a godson (and she told his mother that she thinks mulder is cute)

she did her residency in forensic medicine

she's good with dogs and is naturally drawn to all kinds of animals (even evil-looking monkeys)

she wants to keep her christmas tree up all year because her father always made her take it down as soon as the holiday was over

(and she was never positive that her father, who was in the navy and involved in the cuban blockade, was truly proud of her, because she joined the FBI instead of becoming a full-time doctor like he had wanted)

((and he didn't say "i love you" the last time he spoke to her. ouch))

when she was 14, she stole one of her mother's cigarettes, which she thought was disgusting, but she wanted to do something Forbidden for once

she once forgot her own birthday (which is february 23rd) when she was studying for her exams

she has a little cat sign on her apartment door <3

when challenged by the preacher's kid, she refused to deny the power of God; she was raised catholic, and remembers that "God never lets the devil steal the show"

(she's almost always wearing a cross necklace, even while declaring that she considers science sacred)

((and yes, her favorite movie is the exorcist))

she took some biology courses on bugs and is now going to tell you some bug facts

she has two brothers, one younger and one older

her dad- with whom she did not have the greatest of relationships- nicknamed her "starbuck"

(he called her this after the steady and rational first mate character from moby dick; all the more cruel when you consider he pushed her aside for joining the FBI rather than doing the "logical" thing, becoming a doctor. to cast her in a role of the dutiful daughter without her permission and then create a conditional sense of love is just. so mean. it's a miracle she didn't turn out as emotionally repressed as he did)

[pennyserenade]

thinking about mulder and scully and how gentle he was with her when she was lying there in the hospital dying. he walked into the room with a wide grin and held her hand and kissed her cheek, and spoke to her in hushed, conspiratorial tones, and everything was life or death but it was so quiet, so unimportant, as he sat by her side and looked at her. mulder looked as happy as he’d ever been, sitting there with her, and it wasn’t because he was; he wasn’t. he knew that she was dying, that they were coming upon the moment when she was no longer going to be with him sooner rather than later, and he was crushed by the weight of it, by the impossibility of it. when he came to see her again and she was sleeping, looking pallid and defeated, he slumped against her bed and cried on his knees in the dark—quiet, body wracking sobs she never knew about, because he never wanted her to know how weak her being weak made him. with the weight of impending death, mulder gave scully the most of life, all that he wished she could’ve received but hadn’t: that coddling, that affection, the beautiful mundaneness of domestic bliss. he listened to her—really listened to her. and he really loved her, loved her like a husband, or a boyfriend, loved her the way a better man would’ve.

and then when scully got better, when the cloud of death evaporated and she appeared before him with color in her cheeks and flirtation on her tongue, he took it back. gone were the days of all that soft love and affection and back was the mulder and scully of old. he sidetracked their team bonding workshop, pointedly ignored the glaring fact that scully agreed he needed to work on his communication, and got them stranded in the depths of the floridian forest. even better, he let her coddle him, let her hold him close to her chest and made her sing him a song as they shivered through the night and watched out for monsters that could kill them, because he couldn’t handle it. the idea of being anything to scully other than what he had been before — a nuisance, a challenge, a partner — terrified him so badly he went into overdrive trying to reinforce those uncomplicated roles again. it wasn’t that he didn’t love her. he did — he loved her to the point of insanity, to the point of self destruction (something she so worried about). he just didn’t know how to love scully when it wasn’t dire. he loved her so much that he could not stand the idea of failing her with anything inadequate and half baked. he was glad to give it to her when it was dire, but when it came to life long devotion, he needed a few more years.

[fringephile]

But you SAVED me.

You kept me honest.

You made me a whole person.

I owe you everything, Scully...

and you owe me nothing.

[wickershells]

the x-files — s3 e22 ‘quagmire’ | s4 e5 ‘the field where i died’

[billiewena]

THREE YEARS SINCE NOV 5TH, 2020 as summed up by Supernatural (sequel to this and this)

image ID & context below:

[image ID: screenshots of Supernatural paired with screenshots of various tweets, news headlines and Tumblr posts.

A screenshot of Ed and Harry in SPN 3x13 Ghostfacers saying "You gotta be gay for that poor dead intern" with a screenshot of Misha Collins at the SPNNJ 2023 convention saying "I got a call from Warner Bros and they were like hey uh...is there any world you just let it go?" This is in reference to an incident in 2022 where Misha accidentally made headlines after a comment that seemed to be referring to his sexuality. His comments at this year's panel imply that the studio in fact did not want him to retract the comment and make the apology that he posted, but to instead just roll with it.

A screenshot of Bobby saying "Time travel?" and Dean saying "Yeah" in SPN 6x18 with a headline that says "Jensen Ackles' Explains The Winchester's Multiverse Twist & Supernatural Connection." This is about the series finale of Jensen's Supernatural spinoff "The Winchesters", in which it is revealed Dean and the Impala somehow traveled the multiverse to the alternate timeline the show takes place in.

A screenshot of Dean in SPN 15x08 saying "He's back, and he's out of control" with a screenshot of Misha Collin's first Tumblr post in seven years, a video with him and his brother being a public nuisance on public transportation. Also included are screenshots of various Tumblr users reacting with tags from various tumblr users. becauseofthebowties: "mishacollinsofficial tumblr account back from the dead???" myboobsarentsentientbeings: "this is the first thing he posts? after nearly 7 years???" casismybestfriend: "RED FUCKING ALERT MISHA IS BACK ON TUMBLR" cannabiscasgate: "who the fuck gave you back your password"

A screenshot of two news anchors in SPN 14x20, with one (named Jack) telling his co-host "I love you" and her replying "Jack?" with screenshots of the Destiel/Supernatural Confession meme trending multiple times this year with other current events topics like Russia, Titanic, etc. There is also a screenshot of a post by saintedcastiel that says "I cannot believe that since we started using the destiel meme as a breaking news alert that there hasn't been ONE destiel news anchor AU fic where they're co-anchors on the morning news. cas confessed on accident while they're on air and dean doesn't know how to respond so he just reads the next thing on the teleprompter."

A screenshot of Dean in SPN 5x14 as Cupid says "I-I was just following orders" with a screenshot of an anonymous Tumblr ask to user luxshine. The ask says "Hey! I was wondering if you have any updates on the LATAM dub situation and if you were/will able to contact the dub director". luxshine says "Hi! Well I could get the translator (you know, our dear rogue translator) and he told me that while he doesn't remember it completely (because he translates a lot of series) if Dean said "And I you" it's because the script he got said "And" I you" and the video he saw said "And I you" because he doesn't add stuff." This is in reference to a change in Spanish LATAM dub of Castiel's confession SPN 15x18, which added a line where Dean reciprocates, which was previously suspected to be a change added by the LATAM dubbing director or translator

A screenshot of a detective from SPN 8x08 saying, "[Chuckles] Whatever you say Scully" with a screenshot of the tumble blr blog ao3topshipsbracket's poll "AO3 Top Relationships Bracket - Round 2 Side 1" with Fox Mulder/Dana Scully (The X-Files) vs. Castiel/Dean Winchester (Supernatural.) In the final results from 51,514 votes, Mulder/Scully won by 53% and Castiel/Dean won by 47%. In early 2023, Tumblr added a polls feature which has led to numerous content, debates, and bracket polls similar to this.

A screenshot from SPN 11x15 where Dean says "No money, no glory" with a headline that says "Supernatural creator Eric Kripke gets 'zero' residuals from Netflix"

A screenshot of Dean rising from his grave in SPN 4x01 with a screenshot of a post from the official CW Supernatural Instagram with a clip from the pilot episode and the caption "And the story continues..." and a comment from a user that says "THE STORY CONTINUES?? WTF ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL US?? I HAVE ANXIETY YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME." For context, no one is sure if the post was supposed to reference new content from Supernatural or not but it has led to speculation.

A screenshot of SPN 8x01, with the onscreen lyric "Another year has passed me by."

[crowwithacomputer]

there's a very clear distinction of behaviour between Mulder and Scully from before and after her abduction.

like, before that they cared about each other, or course, but when Scully was abducted? God's afraid of what Mulder would do for that woman. He almost got into a fight in the hospital and choked a guy god damnit. He was gonna resign from the job and REFUSED to work with anyone else other than Scully. He only worked with Krycek because he "believed" him and didn't question much imo.

but right after he visited her she woke up, and when he visited her and gave her back her cross that he'd been wearing all the time? that, my dear friends, is love at first abduction.

all the episodes after that, that I've seen so far (S2) have just been Mulder madly in love with whatever Scully says. He's deeply concerned for her safety all the time and he started making many more jokes. They also get told that they're a couple all the time (ofc this is just clearly what the series wants you to think) but he doesn't clarify, nor Scully does. They just look at each other and smile.

They're always looking at each other and smiling. Even the stupidest thing makes them look at the other to see their reaction. All the small things (and not so small, how dare you clean sauce off of her mouth without even asking like you do that every day Mulder) they do, the little jokes. And all these after the abduction. Before that it's REALLY noticeable how that is not as common by far.

I really love this tension, this is a good sexual tension imo. It's not uncomfortable, it's not weird, they're having the best time of their lives. I think they know they love each other a lot as friends, but there's that point there, that thin line where your love for your friend becomes something more intense, but it's such a small step they don't even notice and that's the good stuff. They don't deny their love, but their romance.

[slippinmickeys]

Not a prompt, just something I've been playing with forever and actually had a few minutes last night to sit with it.

The plum-colored hollows under her eyes—even from twenty feet away—even through a window—practically took him out at the knees. 

He has to psyche himself up to walk into the room, something he has never had to do outside an autopsy bay. Usually, if she’s in a room, it’s where he wants to be, too. 

He’d hovered in the hallway, waiting for her mother and brother to leave, and strolls in with a smile and a positivity so forced it borders on hysterical. 

He can tell right away she doesn’t buy it. 

“What say the doctors?” he asks, taking her cold hand in his own, trailing tubes like an untied shoe. He’s careful not to bump her IV port. 

“No improvement,” she says, and he can tell she’s holding back tears. 

“We’ll it’s not—“

“Mulder,” she says, a warning. A plea. 

Something tight forms behind his ribs. 

“I’ve asked Father McCue to come administer last rites.”

All his muscles suddenly tense, and he feels as though if he weren’t doing his absolute best to remain as unaffected as possible, he might hyperextend into the spastic U of a tetanus patient. 

“It’s too early,” he says, and he knows it’s the wrong thing when she closes her eyes and rests them, her face looking ever so slightly pained. 

He squeezes her hand. “May I wait with you?” he asks, his voice very compact and small. 

She nods and they sit quietly. So quietly that eventually a nurse slips an arm into the cracked door and dims the lights. 

His thoughts cast off into the cosmos, rippling through space time in search of the crossroads where an atheist and Catholic might meet when all is said and all is done. 

He watches her as she drifts into a light sleep, the cannula in her nose flaring with vapor at every exhale. 

Eventually there is a soft knock on the door and Mulder turns to see her priest. The man smiles at him kindly, but Mulder doesn’t return it. Her god is angry and vengeful. Her god is unfeeling and cruel. 

“Scully,” he says gently, lifting her knuckles to his mouth again, pressing warmth into the dry, papery skin.

Scully rolls to face him, the Vermeer arc of her aristocratic cheek lined in shadow.  

Father McCue comes into the room. Speaks. 

“Would you like to stay and say a prayer with us?” The man asks Mulder politely. “I think Dana might like that.”

Anger washes over him. Anger at cancer and Scully and her god. Anger at this priest sent to speak over her soul, to shuttle it along as if it wasn’t already anchored to his. 

There are worlds she hasn’t seen yet. Stories she hasn’t told. 

It’s a crime what’s happening to her. 

It’s an atrocity. 

It’s a sin. 

“You want to know what I think?” He rises to his feet, ignores the priest. Speaks directly to her. “I think God should be asking you for mercy,” he says, bringing her knuckles to his lips before pulling away. Before dropping her hand. “I think God should be asking for your forgiveness.”

She looks at him, her face in shock. 

“I don’t think you should grant it.”

He turns from her and silently slips out of the room.

[thursdayinspace]

ficlet: muscle memory (or not)

For @graciehart because she's awesome and she asked for revival smut. So, this is after Sushi:

Scully has no house, but she has a Mulder. Killer robots made them do it. Or not. Maybe they have to take responsibility for this one themselves.

Rated: Explicit

tagging @today-in-fic

--

Scully sighs as she sinks onto the couch, Mulder echoing her sigh with one of his own as he drops into his seat next to her.

“That was an interesting night,” she says.

He laughs and lets his head fall back. “Running for out lives from artificial intelligence? Yeah. Interesting is definitely one way to put it.”

“Thanks for letting me stay here.”

“Anytime. I’m sorry about your house.”

She debates telling him that she never really liked the place anyway, but decides against it. That would lead to a whole lot of questions she isn’t ready to be asked. “It’s okay. But I might have to stay here for a while. Since my front wall is missing and half my things are burned to a crisp.”

“Stay as long as you want,” he says, and she doesn’t know how to answer that either. As long as she wants… she’s too tired tonight to deny that if he extended a permanent invitation, she’d probably take it.

“I’ll take the couch, of course.”

The look on his face as he turns his head is one of pure amusement. “And you expect me to say yes to that.”

“Not really, I guess. But how are we gonna do this, then?”

“We can share the bed.” He shrugs. “Unless you really don’t want to, in which case I will take the couch, or get an air mattress or something.”

“Air mattresses squeak on hardwood floors. You don’t sleep well as it is.” She licks her lips, staring intently at her knees. “The bed is fine.” She can’t help admitting to herself that a small part of her had been hoping to end up in his bed tonight anyway. They went on a date, for fuck’s sake. And since they used to be in a committed relationship for years before it all went to hell, she’s not sure all her previous rules about no sex on first dates really apply here. Separated or not, he’s still her Mulder and never stopped being that.

“Okay,” he says. “It’s gonna be fine. I mean, we’ll be asleep. And we can keep our hands to ourselves.” He sounds like he’s trying very hard to convince himself of that fact.

She’s not sure at all he’s right about it. Not when simply sitting right next to him makes her want to climb into his lap and kiss him senseless. But it’s gonna be fine. They’ll both be on their best behavior.

**

It’s muscle memory, she thinks, when he shuffles close to her the second they lie down and spoons up behind her. It’s muscle memory when she takes his arm and hooks it firmly over her waist, snuggling back into him. This is just how they used to fall asleep. Before. It doesn’t mean anything.

Neither does it mean anything when he kisses her neck after saying goodnight and she laces her fingers with his and lets out a content exhale.

And it doesn’t mean anything when she feels him growing hard against her and presses into him encouragingly before he can pull away.

“Scully,” he says, voice pleading, and she isn’t sure whether he’s pleading for her to stop or to keep going. But he stays where he is, and when she rubs her butt against his growing erection, he rocks into her.

Her mantra of “this doesn’t mean anything” begins to falter when she turns in his arms and he claims her mouth in a hungry kiss. But then again, it’s like she told herself earlier: they used to be practically married; the rules don’t really apply here. And they had a really tough night and deserve to end it with something fun.

Fun. That’s what this is. They’re having fun. Plus, they have needs. She hasn’t had sex since they broke up, and she’s pretty sure that neither has he. And sex is fun. They can give each other this. And they did go on a date. Although that would imply that maybe this does mean something after all…

“You’re thinking very loudly,” Mulder says, his lips brushing hers as he speaks.

“What are we doing?” she asks.

He pulls back, pauses. “Do you want to stop?”

She doesn’t even have to think about it. “Absolutely not.”

“But…” He hesitates. “We should probably talk about this.”

“I agree.”

“About what this means.”

“We really should.”

“Because this could change everything.”

“Definitely.” She moves her face closer to his until their lips catch. “We need to talk. Right now.”

“Before we go any further.”

“Yeah.” She kisses him again and lets him roll her onto her back, spreading her thighs so he can settle between them. “Talking would be a great idea.”

He hums as he pushes her shirt up, and she gasps as he squeezes one of her breasts and sucks her other nipple into his mouth. She’s throbbing with arousal, aching, and honestly, what is there to say anyway? He’s Mulder. There’s no universe in which she’s going to say no to this, not now, not anymore, not after all the hard work they’ve put into finding their way back to each other.

And when he kisses his way down her body, ridding her of her pants (his running shorts) and lowers his face between her thighs, any last remnant of doubt drops clean out of her head.

He moans as he licks her open, parting her folds and piercing her with his tongue. God, she’s been craving this. He hooks her legs over his shoulders and sets to work, lips and teeth and tongue, driving her out of her mind with need. This is not gonna take long.

She made herself bury the memories deep after they split up, tried so hard not to think of him when she got herself off at night, but forgetting this has always been impossible. Nothing in the world compares to the enthusiasm with which Fox Mulder eats pussy. He seems lost in it, enjoying himself so much he’s groaning into her as he presses his face closer and closer, flattening his tongue against her clit and making her whimper as her body tightens impossibly.

Her legs draw up and her back arches, her fingers curling into his hair, and her first orgasm hits her with such force it steals her breath away. He draws it out, sending fresh sparks of pleasure through her again and again until her body protests, slumping onto the mattress, heart racing.

“Fuck,” he gasps, lifting his head and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “I missed this.”

All she can manage is a nod; she can’t speak yet. But she’s definitely done mourning the loss of her vibrator.

“God, you’re beautiful,” He moves up so he’s on top of her, and then he’s kissing her deeply, her taste still on his tongue. She hopes repairing her house will takes weeks. Months. Forever. Hell, maybe she’ll just leave it the way it is. Who even cares anymore.

“Fuck me,” she whispers, and he doesn’t ask if she’s sure. He doesn’t hesitate. They know each other; they can read each other better than anyone else.

With one long, hard thrust he’s all the way inside her and she cries out; the incredible stretch is just on the right side of too much. He’s so big. Another thing she never got over: how he fills her completely, how she feels him everywhere, how her body loves this sensation of being absolutely owned by him.

“You feel so good,” he says, voice strained as he stays perfectly still, letting her adjust to the intrusion.

“Move,” she begs. She needs to feel this, she needs to be sore from this, she needs him to just… take her. She needs him.

“Scully—”

“Hard,” she says.

She can pinpoint the second his self-control shatters. He groans and pulls back, then slams back inside hard enough to make her slide up the bed. And then he does it again, and again.

“Yes,” she whimpers, “God, yes.”

He grabs onto the headboard for leverage with one hand and curls the other around the back of her shoulder to keep her in place, and then he fucks her. He fucks her the way she tried so hard not to remember, the way that reminds her why she never bothered looking for anyone else. He fucks her like he’s claiming her, and she wonders if he really doesn’t know that she’s already his. But she’ll let herself be claimed as many times as he wants. It doesn’t change a thing, but it feels really fucking good.

She rakes her nails down his back and wraps her legs around his waist and has no voice to ask him for more, but he understands, he gets her.

The bed is shaking underneath them, slamming into the wall with each of his thrusts, and she can’t hold back her moans, doesn’t even try to. This is more than sex, more than release after a tough night, more than reconnection, even. This is an explosion, bottled up tension and longing bursting out of them with an intensity that sets the world on fire.

They don’t need to talk about this. It’s clear what it means. There’s no going back.

And the relief makes her call out his name, over and over, the only word that matters. Mulder. Mulder.

He knows how to move inside her, he knows how to get her where he wants her, how to give her what she needs. She’s burning up, the pressure in her core is unbearable, but he keeps her right on the edge for minutes, driving her wild but not letting her fall.

Flashes, hints of pleasure spike through her with every push in, and it’s so close to being enough, but not quite, not quite…

“Please,” she whines, “Please, please…”

“I’ve got you,” he pants, “Scully…”

He changes his angle, grinding against her clit, and her body comes off the mattress, her muscles tensing up in anticipation of her release.

“Come for me,” he says, and she does.

She comes so hard she screams, her nails breaking the skin as she takes his upper arms in a death grip, and wave after wave of pure bliss tears through her, making her tremble as her body rides it out underneath him.

He follows her moments later, burying himself deep inside her, spilling into her, his teeth against the sensitive skin of her neck as he gives her a few final, erratic thrusts before he collapses on top of her.

She’s vaguely aware of him rolling them over so he’s on his back and she’s lying there half draped over him. She’s exhausted. Spent. So indescribably happy she can’t stop smiling.

“Wow,” he says at last.

“Yeah.” She laughs, loud and uninhibited and delirious with joy. “That was…”

“Perfect.”

“Unexpected.”

“Unexpectedly perfect?”

She looks up, shaking her head at him before leaning in for a quick kiss. “The ‘perfect’ part was absolutely expected. It’s you, after all.”

The happiness on his face makes her heart rate pick up again. She wants to make him smile. She wants him to know everything he is to her.

“I really didn’t plan this,” he promises.

“I know. Neither did I.”

“But I’m glad that it happened.”

“God, I missed you,” she says on an exhale, and he wraps his arms more tightly around her.

“And all it took to get us here was a few killer robots.”

“No.” She cards a hand through his hair. “All it took was us. And some time.”

“Yeah, that sounds a lot better.”

He pulls her into another kiss and she lets herself sink into it; she hasn’t really felt at home anywhere since the day she left him. But right here, in this moment, she thinks maybe it’s time to finally come home.

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s6 episode 6 "how the ghosts stole christmas" thoughts

a christmas episode!! and i shall be watching it exactly one month after christmas. this does make me a little sad; i wish i could travel back in time with what i know now and watch it then. and then maybe i’d feel all festive. but! what can you do? i shall embrace it even though there stands between me and christmas 11 months.

i haven’t watched an episode in a week-ish, so i’m excited to get back into the swing of things. let’s gooo!!

post-episode thoughts: oh my god, this episode was incredible. what if we (platonically) went to the house where two lovers famously kill other lovers each christmas? and then those ghosts tormented us with our deepest insecurities? and when they tried to trick us into killing each other, our love was simply too strong and we wouldn't fall for it? would that be festive? would you hold my hand when we walked across the rickety floorboards and found our own bodies beneath them?

love... it's alive, and well. or, in some cases, dead and well <3

PLEASE tell me what you thought of this episode. i want to go into depth on each line and do intense character analysis.

but back to past me:

well, why are they in a haunted house in maryland on christmas eve?? is kersh punishing them with a christmas assignment?

(the answer is no. it was all mulder. honestly, i should have expected that by now)

let us open with some spoooooky organ music. while mulder has christmas songs on in the car!

scully pulls in late!! she was in the checkout line, buying gifts!! “if i heard silent night one more time, i was going to start taking hostages” <- lmaoooo, i love her!!!!! she is so real for that. she truly has endured so much.

he brought her here for a stakeout?! “on christmas eve.” “it’s an important date” “no kidding” <- BAHAHA, i love when she’s a smartass. now, why are they doing this!!!

she has wrapping to do!!! he looks in her car and sees she has gifts. and he sadly says "oh...." but she acquiesces and gets in his car to hear this spooky story

SHE’S GOT HOLIDAY CHEER TO SPREAD, DAMNIT!! 

(this line KILLED me. seems she does NOT play when it comes to the holiday season!)

she has FAMILY ROLL CALL at 6 am?!?! oh. god bless her poor soul.

he locks the car before she can get out and says he’ll make it fast, bahaha (loud scully sigh)

he starts talking about christmas 1917, and did he mention it was a time of “dark, dark despair?” well, it was.

oh, now she’s hooked on this story of star-crossed lovers. i heard the interest in that “go on”.

maurice was “brooding” and “heroic”, and he loved lyda, who had a “light that seemed to follow her wherever she went”; they ended their lives together so they would never be apart. and now, each christmas eve, they come back to haunt this spooky house in maryland.

AWWW, she compliments how he told the story, and says it’s a good one, but she does not believe it. 

“you don’t believe in ghosts?!” “that surprises you?” <- STOP, SHE IS SO FUNNY, LMAOOOO

“well, yeah! i thought everybody believed in ghosts” ohhhh… okay. yeah, he would think that.

she has to go now, and he starts to enter the spooky house. she asks “don’t you have somewhere to be?” and to that i ask, oh, my poor, sweet scully, where would he go? to the vineyard? last time we saw his mom, he was tripping on K, accused her of having an affair, and then she slapped him and he left scully at her house. i hope they made up for that. but i haven’t seen or heard any indication either way.

she does not want to follow his ass in: “i’m not gonna do it. my new year’s resolution” <- bahaha, but where are her keys??? 

oooo, spooky thunder!! clocks chiming eerily!!! she just wants her keys, and he claims that he does not have them!! do we believe him?? hmm… jury’s still out on that one.

scully knows the weather said there is an 80% chance of rain!! maybe even a white christmas!! oh, but instead of letting her enjoy such a thing, the doors crash and lock them both inside!!!

(something about her wanting a white christmas made me emotional in a way i cannot quite articulate. she's kind of a romantic. and i love that for her <3)

(intro time) ooooo, sooo spOoOOoky!

oh, so just when i think we’ll never see it again, they DO hit us with the full intro!!!! chris carter, i am onto your tricks. but i much prefer the full intro. it feels so right.

back to this spooky mansion.

LET HER OUT!! he is not helping her escape and is instead telling her there is nothing to be afraid of because “ghosts are benevolent entities…. mostly”

hey man. that's not super reassuring.

she tries to check the time- and the clock strangely matches her watch, which is super weird for an abandoned old house- and then declares that she REALLY HAS TO GET HOME, when some sort of figure in white appears in a crack of thunder!!!

LMAOOOO, SHE IS JUST MONOLOGUING ABOUT HOW RIDICULOUS SOCIETY IS FOR EXPECTING GHOSTS TO BE REAL. i would have copied it down, but it just KEPT going and i kept laughing.

she admits to being afraid. and i love that. i love that her method for dealing with fear is to infodump. yeah. you tell ‘em, girl! tell them about the essence of humanity and the unconscious yearnings to live forever!! 

but it’s an IRRATIONAL fear, she points out! i would be afraid, too! of spooky ghosts AND rabid bats, rotting wood, lead paint, and other dangers of creepy abandoned buildings!

she goes ahead to investigate this other room, and he says “i’ve got your back” bahaha 

she asks if maybe someone lives here, because look!! the light is on in the library!! they have a LIBRARY?? woah, i don’t even know what this room is- it's got bookshelves on the walls, but almost looks like a ballroom on the floor- but it sure is cool!!

so the clock downstairs is somehow still keeping time which is super weird for an abandoned old building, and something is… smoking, it looks like? yeah, maybe it isn’t abandoned. hmm… 

it’s the fireplace- it was just put out! “why would anyone want to live in a cursed house?” “mulder, it’s not enough for it to be haunted? it has to be cursed?” LMAOOO 

oh, he just now CASUALLY drops that there have been 3 double murders (all of couples) in the last 80 years, and all of them were on christmas eve. GET TF OUT OF THERE!!! this seems like RELEVANT INFORMATION THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN MENTIONED BEFORE YOU BROUGHT YOUR PARTNER INTO THIS DEATH TRAP!!

and then the lights go out!! and a door slams!!! and there is some weird sound and creaking floorboards…. they’re locked in!!

he’s trying to listen to the floor….

AWWW, HE SCARED HER!!!! he held the flashlight under his face and she yelled “that’s NOT funny!” <- you tell him!!

he wants to free someone from beneath the floor boards? how did he hear someone beneath the floor? but it’s just a dead body. so i guess he was half right, as he declares. looks super dead. as in dead for a very long time. oh, and there’s another!!

a man and a woman!! shot to death. and she has bright red hair. coincidence….?

well, must be not, because scully points out that the dead woman is WEARING HER OUTFIT.

(he laughs) “how embarrassing” <- LMAOOO, NOW YOU STFUUUU!!!!!

(i'm so used to his dumbass one liners, but this one really killed me for some reason)

and at first i didn’t notice, because the dead guy had a winter coat on and mulder just had a leather jacket, but he is wearing his outfit!! they put together that it is somehow them, and they RUN!!

at first i thought it was the original couple that died, but how would they get under the floor? so maybe it actually is mulder and scully in some cosmic way. don’t question it too hard.

they ran into the same room!!! well, maybe if you have one stylish room, you just make it again. and again. 

nooo!! the rooms are looping!! and they get separated somehow!! 

i wish the lighting was better; i want to stare at these paintings on the walls. they look so pretty. i wonder if they built this creepy house just for this episode and decorated it all spooky, or if there’s a stock studio haunted mansion set that gets used for lots of shows and movies. the frames are so pretty!

but back to the problem at hand. where is scully?? he’s yelling, but she’s not responding!!

he shoots th,e handle of the door and opens it to a brick wall???

A MAN APPEARS!! “who are you?” “that’s a question i should be asking you, being this is my house you’re standing in” <- GET HIS ASS!!

perhaps they shall finally face consequences for breaking and entering.

mysterious man flicks on the lights. 

mysterious man seems to be unable to tell that the door leads straight to a brick wall, or perhaps mulder is somehow seeing that. mulder says “we”, tipping off the man that there is someone else here. but mulder goes straight to accusing him of being a ghost! a bold move…

mystery guy laughs and asks mulder if he’s a ghost hunter, saying a lot of strange folks come around. he tries to deflect with a “strange folks? like those under the floor-“ but when he turns around, there is nothing there apart from some furniture!!

you know shit is going down when the mystery old man says “why don’t you have a seat, son”

oh plot twist, mystery man reveals he is in the field of mental health and specializes in “disorders and manias related to pathological behavior as it pertains to the paranormal”. okay, yeah, now i definitely believe that this dude is a real ghost and he is just doing all this to personally torture mulder.

the type of ghost hunter this mystery man encounters, and therefore he also he believes mulder to be, is as follows: a “narcissistic, overzealous, self-righteous egomaniac”; “you kindly think of yourself as single-minded, but you’re prone to obsessive compulsiveness, workaholism, antisocialism- fertile fields for the descent into total wacko breakdown” BAHAHAHA

well. yes! 

while i do support generally roasting mulder for his various qualities, i also need to know where scully is. 

“you know why you think you’ve seen the things you do?” “because… i have seen them?”  okay, sassy!

“‘cause you’re a lonely man” <- OH DAMN. that shut him up.

mystery man is really being mean now… OH SHIT, did mulder steal scully's car keys to get her to stick around with him??? i hope that isn't true, but knowing him, it probably is, and that behavior seems to match some of those adjectives that were tossed about moments before

“you know why you do it- listen endlessly to her droning rationalizations. ‘cause you’re afraid. afraid of the loneliness” <- oh man. now you’ve got him sad and pondering. he looks like he’s gonna cry, but he’s gonna try and be tough about it and smile. and say politely that he would like to find his partner.

(and i would like to contemplate these lines- do we think they are true? or do we think mystery man just wanted to hit him where it hurts? "droning rationalizations" is pretty harsh; seeing scully as nothing more than a beacon against being alone doesn't seem to capture their dynamic accurately, unless you interpret it in the most selfish light possible, which is probably what that mean inner voice of mulder's head does. hmm...)

and now the brick wall behind the door is gone and mystery man can just walk through…. but mulder cannot!!! it is just a real brick wall!! and he slams his beautiful nose!!!

so... did he imagine all of that???

scully is still yelling for him!!

NOOOOO, SCULLY GETS SO SCARED AND SCREAMS AND PULLS OUT HER GUN WHEN THIS LADY APPEARS LMAOOOOO she’s absolutely SHAKING “please, i’m a little on edge” <- yeah queen, we can tell 💜

ohhh, poor sweet scully, apologizing for scaring this lady; it’s just that they found bodies! and when she tries to show her where the bodies are… there is only furniture!!

she very rarely gets scared. must have been the combo of spookiness on a night she associated with being cozy and warm. and also seeing what she does not believe in. AND being separated from mulder. truly multiple things factoring into her fear here.

scully has her gun aimed at this mystery woman, and her hands are shaking as she asks “where’s my partner?” - and when she goes to open the door, there is also! just! a! brick! wall!

how can this keep happening?!

she circling the mystery woman, holding her gun, and i guess we’re getting some psychoanalysis on both ends of this brick wall:

“oh, you poor child. you must have an awful small life. spending your christmas eve with him, running around chasing things you don’t even believe in” oh, wow... that is so mean.........

LMAO, mystery woman is going on about the “subconscious desire to find fulfillment through another” and “intimacy through co-dependency” (which. okay. yeah, that one is accurate) and scully's dirty little secret that “your only joy in life is proving him wrong”.

but unlike mulder, who was taking this analysis sitting down, she seems scared, but still spits out “you don’t know me!" i LOVE that about her!! truly!!!

“and this isn’t your house” “you wouldn’t think so, the way i’m being treated” DAMN! these ghosts are gagging them 💀💀💀

“well, then, why is all of the furniture covered?” “we’re having the house painted” “well, then where’s your christmas tree?” “we’re jewish” LMAOOO

enter mystery man!!!! scully is telling him to NOT MOVE or she WILL SHOOT HIM!!!! she needs to know WHERE MULDER IS!! and these ghosts better MOVE OVER THERE!!!!!!!

“this violates our civil rights!! i have friends at the ACLU!!” LMAOOOO

well, she makes them put their hands up, and mystery woman has a hole blown completely through her belly. so. not great. and his hat is hiding the bullet hole through his head!!!

i mean, it was pretty obvious that these here ghosts were lyda and maurice, but i wanted to go along with the mystery bit until the big reveal. and now i shall use their government names.

SCULLY!!! SHE PASSED OUT!!!! OHHHHH, POOR BABY

the ghosts are lamenting that they used to get years to drive the visitors mad, but now they get just ONE NIGHT!!! i would be pissed, too!!! 

BAHAHA, WHAT? “look, if we let our reputations slip, they’re going to take us off the tourist literature” <- BAHAHAHA OH MY GOD. wait, hold on, that’s so fucking funny.

she picked christmas as their one night a year because that is when people have no HOPE LMAOOOO and maurice looks down and says “these two do seem pretty miserable”

they smooch over poor scully’s fainted body as they declare they must show them how lonely christmas can be!!

mulder is climbing up the bookshelves, trying to get tf out of this trap room, when lyda arrives!! she calls him a “masher” (i don’t know what this means, so i hope it is not offensive) and he fires back with “frump”, only to be met by ANOTHER brick wall

(dictionary.com says that a masher is "a man who makes advances, especially to women he does not know, with a view to physical intimacy". so now we know! she accused him of hitting on her!)

“what happened to the star crossed lovers?” “oh, let me tell you, the romance is the first thing to go” <- that is a CRAZY thing to say about the guy you ended your life with 💀💀

he realizes that she is lyda, and the man is maurice!! 

she summons books from the shelves!! and says she was young and beautiful once, just like your partner. she hands him a book telling their story. so i guess you can still age in the afterlife. who knew?

she’s sitting down and he’s standing in front of her, but the focus gets all fuzzy and weird when the camera turns to him. i can’t tell if this came from reshoots or what, but lyda is crisp and clear and he is not 💀

she assumes they came here “to be together for eternity”, which gets him giggling 

“you knew this house was haunted, maybe you two should have discussed your real feelings before you came out here” OHH! SHE IS GOING THERE!!

taunt him. he just confessed his love a few episodes ago!!! do not think i forgot!!

and lyda shows him the hole in her CHEST??? i swear it was just in her belly with scully. “i don’t show my hole to just anyone” is INSANE, LMAOOO

“oh, you’re trying to tell me that scully’s going to shoot me. scully is NOT going to shoot me” AWWW, i love the certainty with which he said that

“maybe she shoots herself” “i wouldn’t let her” ohhhh…. he is so confident… but trickery is afoot, so who knows??

(also, i think lyda's line, “if you shoot first, for her, the rest is an act of faith” is a very fascinating one. one i want to unpack for years to come. but i do not have the capacity to do it now, so i am simply noting it)

OH MY GOD??? she’s trying to tell him to end their lives together???

(he sighs) “we’re not lovers”

“and this isn’t a pure science. but you’re both so attractive, and there will be a lot of time to work that out.” (she hands him the gun) “think of it as the last christmas you’ll spend alone” 

she drops the gun and disappears

so, do lyda and maurice need people (couples, specifically) to either kill themselves or be killed in order to maintain their spooky reputation? and maybe their spooky power? maybe since they haven’t had a couple’s death in a long time, that is why they can only haunt people on christmas? like, they only have enough spectral energy from the blood sacrifices to show up one day a year? i’m trying to flesh this out here.

scully wakes up!!! she’s alone with her gun and flashlight, and she still can’t get the door open!! when maurice reappears!!

“i am quite capable of pulling this trigger”, she warns him, and we know that to be very true!!

OH NO!!! i see where this is going… maurice is going to try and convince her that mulder wants to kill her… so she will shoot him first, and then they can be together forever or something…

she says that it is all just a bad dream, and it’s in her head, but. well. here she is. interesting rationalization on her part. i would have expected her to pull the folie a deux card.

maurice hands her the car keys, saying that mulder is acting out "an unconscious yearning from the deep-seated terror of being alone” <- so would that make him a threat? does he genuinely want to convince her that mulder is going to kill her so they can always be together?

mulder’s pounding on the door and yelling for her. she takes the keys and tells maurice to open the door. she has her gun trained on him….

she doesn’t believe him that mulder wants to kill her!!!!

mulder opens the door… and asks where scully is… AND HE SHOOTS???????

WHAT!!!!

okay, but he’s not shooting HER!!! he's shooting nearby though, so please be careful. she’s scared!!!

why is he being crazy!!! look at that physical acting!! he's deranged!! he says all that is out there is loneliness!!! AND THEN HE SHOOTS HER FOR REAL????

she falls over as she bleeds into her white blouse…. he stands over her, saying “merry christmas, scully”

but!!! it was really lyda that took his shape to shoot her!!!!

so he didn’t REALLY do any of that???? but scully thinks he did!

he runs in, finds her bleeding out on the floor!!! “i didn’t believe that you’d do it”

OHHHH, but then it must not really be scully either, because as she is bleeding out, she shoots HIM!!!

but it was really just lyda and maurice playing around???

SO IS SCULLY HURT OR NOT????? JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION!!!

scully is crawling away dying as "have yourself a merry little christmas" plays, and mulder is also crawling with a gaping stomach wound- or are they really the ghosts taking their forms? i don’t KNOW!!

they’re crawling toward each other, their blood and gore all over the floor, and here i ask: what the fuck is happening? mulder’s yelling after her, and they both have their guns pointed at each other.

she asks if he’s afraid, and she says she is, and he admits he is too; “i didn’t shoot you, you shot me!” so their stories diverge...

they’re rolling around in their blood and dying. hey guys. merry christmas.

but then he gets up, and says she’s not been shot, and neither has he!!! it was all a trick!!!!

they run outside, and there is no blood on them at all!!! they get into their cars and drive away!!!!

so, were they in pain like they WERE shot? did they feel like they were dying? or did mulder realize that it was weird he was in no pain despite being shot and then got up and defeated their ghostly tricks?

lyda and maurice lament how they almost had those two, and how christmas is another joyless day of the year- but not for them. “no, we haven’t forgotten the meaning of christmas”; they hold hands and then fade away

STOP! they’re making me sad!!!!

mulder’s at home, watching a christmas carol alone. and it seems to be his usual couch he has back, so i wonder if he managed to restore all of his things after the morris redecorating incident!!! he looks so sad, though!!!

there’s a knocking at his door…. he is suspicious…. it’s scully!!! she couldn’t sleep!!! oh, she asks to come in- she must be so nervous!! she never asks to come in!!! he grabs her by the shoulder

he poses a great question: “aren’t you supposed to be opening christmas gifts with your family?” (she did mention it around a billion times)

“mulder… none of that really happened out there tonight. that was all in our heads, right?” <- ohhh… what do you say to this… a proposed collective hallucination??

he waits a second. “it-it must have been”

(this, too, is FASCINATING. he never agrees with her rationalizations! why does he do it now? does he want her to have some peace for the holidays? i suppose a collective hallucination is less concerning than upending your entire belief system, but not by much!)

they’re both sleep deprived and mumbling about the ghosts poking at their biggest insecurities:

“not that, uh, my only joy in life is proving you wrong”

“when have you proved me wrong?”

“well, why else would you want me out there with you?”

“you didn’t want to be there? oh, that’s um, that’s self-righteous and… narcissistic of me to say, isn’t it?”

“no… maybe i did want to be out there with you”

AWWW, they have no idea wtf is going on, but look at the way he is LOOKING at her as she nearly falls asleep standing up, OH!!! i could cry!!!

they said they wouldn’t exchange gifts, but he has something for her!!! when did they say they wouldn’t do that?!! and he broke that promise anyway!!! look at his big stupid smile!!! look at her face when she sees it!!!! 

and she has something for him too!!! and they run to the couch and open each other's gifts! but we don’t get to see what they are!!! 

and as the camera pulls away, we see snow falling out of the window!!!

OHHH, MY HEART!!!!

man… 

lyda and maurice might actually be the ideal relationship. because i want to haunt people romantically forever. that is so beautiful.

oh, how did we manage to get such excellent character analysis AND silly fluff in one episode??? i feel like i’m going crazy!!!

okay, my biggest question: did he really take her keys??? no one says it outright or not!! it’s implied, but not confirmed either way!! if he did take her keys, that is not a point in his favor. but it would speak to the character flaws maurice accused him of having, in a drastically oversimplified sense. did he steal her keys and make her come out there so he wouldn't be alone on christmas? how can someone be so selfless and selfish?

hold on, i need to watch them open the gifts again… he’s shaking it around, trying to figure out what it is!!! and she’s laughing as she tries to pop it open!!!

ohhh my GOD. i need to go take a nap…….

they’re not lonely!!! they have each other!!! and even the ghosts tease them about having feelings they aren't admitting!!! 

scully was completely ready to just die on that floor, LMAO 

oh, she was so scared!! but she still meant business! she was going to have those ghosts stand against the wall and lift their hands, even if that meant she was going to faint!!

(when faced with people with holes in their body, usually she would not faint, but alas. she is used to this on dead people and dead people alone)

there are definitely some thing in this episode i am still trying to work out logic-wise (was lyda shot in her stomach or her chest? did she change where she was shot to mess with each of them? was lyda pretending to be scully for like, the whole thing after they first met? so how much did they actually experience in their own bodies? and therefore, it was the ghosts that were shooting them, not scully and mulder shooting at each other- but they both ended up fake shot in the end, and then the ghosts hoped that if they have them real guns, they would finish the job- right? how can we analyze the different strategies the ghosts used on each of them to convince them to shoot the other- telling scully that mulder is a danger to her, and telling mulder that if he does this, he will never be alone? is that a foreplay thing for lyda and maurice?)

but overall, i got the gist of it and enjoyed it very much. i think there will be plenty to turn around in my head and analyze for many moons to come. 

and i might sound like a rabid MSR truther, but i would very much like to think that they fell asleep on his stupid little couch after exchanging presents and felt each other breathe for a bit to make up for their exhausting evening before scully left to go deal with her family.

she needed to talk to him first before she did all of that family stuff… she was so bothered by it… and the way he just agreed with her that it was probably all in their heads… is he doing that to try and reassure her everything is okay, or is he agreeing because he doesn’t want to think there is any meaning to it??? 

GOD! i need to turn this one around in my brain for a bit.

the set was also super cool. i wanted to pause and look at stuff!!!

i am very pleased. i would have been likely even more so pleased had i watched this a month ago, but now i can go back and watch it every christmas as i desire! definitely a nice change of pace from the previous christmas episodes that shall not be spoken of in this post. 

but it was a very good episode, even if i am trying to crack the specific character implications (which will continue at length in the tags). some of y'all have had 25 years to do a deep dive into every line, reflect on how the characters see themselves vs who they truly are, and so on, but given that i have had 1 day, i have a lot of catching up to do!

(i would be interested in reading an analysis on this episode, or many other episodes, but those analysis posts tend to always have spoilers in them for things that happen down the road. so i shan't)

oh, scared, shaking scully, starting out apologizing for spooking lyda, then waving her gun around until they did what she said so she could find her mulder…. lifting up maurice’s hat and then passing tf out… rambling all about human nature and irrational fears as she was spooked by the scary old house… refusing to believe mulder would hurt her, and then having to confront the vision of him doing so... UGH!!!!! i just cannot TAKE IT!!! i hope they had the merriest christmas ever after this!!

it looked like she got him a video tape?? maybe a book? but it looked more like a tape to me. and what did he get her in that tube!! a poster of some sort, maybe?? i can’t think of many things that come in tubes. maybe he got her a nice print for her apartment walls. she loves her prints. 

tonight, i shall dream beautiful dreams of being a ghost with the one you love forever and making sure that you keep your scary reputation, lest the tourists stop visiting you. 

[pennyserenade]

i love fox mulder because he responded so beautifully to having a woman come to his room, stripping down to her underwear in a state of vulnerability and fear. many men might’ve let that lead to sex or at least leaned into the suggestiveness of it, but after he inspected her and assuaged her fears mulder gave her a blanket, and then took the floor while she laid on his bed. and that could’ve been enough —probably was enough to make her feel safe with him — but he went a step further and he leaned his head in her direction and told her about the monsters in his closet. scully was shaking and terrified and the whole thing was silly. she was getting spooked over something she didn’t believe in, and he could’ve teased her endlessly for it but instead he said: this was scary for me too. because he knows sometimes mysterious bumps are only mosquito bites, and that there is nothing to be found or bothered about, but sometimes you need someone to indulge you. to hug you. to be there and tell you they understand, too

[lilydalexf]

hello!!! there’s a few fics in my mind but can you refresh me - ones where mulder and scully are at the gunmens for a party?!!?! bless

Here are some very good fics where Mulder and Scully go to a Lone Gunmen party. Enjoy!

die siedler von by kittenscully "Maybe you just like me," Mulder teases. "I dunno what you're talking about." Under his arm, she shifts closer, sweet little face flushed from the whiskey.

far away to the west and south by audries @audriesfic This is what she always thinks of when they are at the gunmen’s: Where the Wild Things Are, an off-brand frat house, a basement lab, Robinson Crusoe, electrical fires, a high school AV club. Outerspace. Jail time for marijuana possession.

Here’s A Hand In Thine by leiascully @leiascully After their Firewalker quarantine, Mulder invites Scully to the Lone Gunmen's New Year's Eve party.

I Put a Spell on You by Sarie_Fairy @sarie-fairy Mulder and Scully get roped into a little moonlighting for The Lone Gunmen at an invitation only Halloween Party. They’re undercover and soon discover that everyone at the party is behaving strangely. Uninhibited. What will they do not to blow their cover? And what happens when you add a little injection of truth serum? Set somewhere around the start of season 6.

Lord of the Flies by lots_of_oranges_outside @lotsoforangesoutside A birthday party.

New Year’s Promises by ScullyLovesQueequeg @suitablyaggrieved The Lone Gunmen are throwing a small party to commemorate the new year and of course, Mulder and Scully were invited. They indulge in a little too much alcohol and share some drunk confessions and hopes for the new year.

Parabiosis by Penumbra @mashnotesofthemythopoeic Science and Mysticism conjoin

radium by Spark_Writer The basement, pencils in the ceiling, guns and monsters and case notes. Scully’s neat little mouth, her pressed skirts and trousers, the clean lines of her collar, her graceful hands moving across her keyboard, her low alto mixing with Mulder’s baritone in practiced rebuttal. Mulder watched her. He thought of Scully, her cancer, her insolvent ova, his fear of losing the X-Files, his fear of losing Scully, his feelings for Scully that ticked ruinously beneath his FBI badge like a bomb. “You,” said Frohike, biting into a burger slathered in caramelized onions, “have to tell her.” “No,” said Mulder. “I can’t. I can’t ruin her life again. I won’t.” Mulder is in love with Scully.

Roll for Initiative by leiascully @leiascully Scully and Mulder attend her birthday party at the Lone Gunmen's headquarters, and then go back to her place for some more private celebrations.

Untitled by @foxmulders times they said hello

Untitled by @soft-thrills TLG catch MSR canoodling

Untitled by @sunflowerseedsandscience First line prompt: "Mulder, I've told you before - I'm not doing that without some *serious* persuasion first - or a stiff drink."

[is-on-its-way]

a peek into mulders trauma re raising a little girl…

Inspired by this tweet:

He sighed as he put the key in the door, his face prereddening at knowing what was in store. Emily had been chattering the entire way home about telling mommy the exciting thing that happened at target. He had tried to smile along and be normal for her.    

She poked him in the chin with a tiny slightly damp five year old finger, bringing him out of his gloomy reverie.

“Poppa, are you sad?” She lifted her head off his shoulder and peered around to look at his face.

He couldn’t help but smile at her, she melted his heart. Every word, every gesture, and angle, so like her mother and yet so like her. Freer than Scully, untouched by the trauma and the heaviness of their world. His heart fluttered with the surge of adreniline he felt at what couldve happened to her if she wasnt just innocently lost and the store employee hadn’t found her. 

“No bub, I’m just a little shaken up at losing you in the store.”

“But it was fun!” She kicked her feet on his hip as they walked in. 

“What was fun?” Scully said walking out from the kitchen a spoon in her hand, her face lighting up when she saw her daughter’s smile.

The pang of guilt hit him hard.

She took Emily’s face in her free hand and kissed her cheek. “Hi my baby” 

“I got lost.” Emily said proudly.

Scullys eyebrows shot up “Oh?” 

She glanced at mulder amused, but cocked her head when she saw him ashen faced. 

“Where did you get lost?” She asked jovially her eyes lingered on him for a moment, it felt like enternity. He was supposed to protect her, scullys only child. He almost… he couldnt think about it. 

“Target!” He heard her say through a tunnel.

“Well tell me all about it while poppa puts the stuff away.” She leaned forward to take emily from him. All he could manage was ‘Thanks’ quietly as he helped her into Scully’s arms. He pulled her ridden-up shirt down and then went to the bathroom with the drug store things they’d picked up. A new pink dinosaur toothbrush and equally jarring bright pink toothpaste with cartoon characters on the tube for Emily and some stuff the house needed. 

He stood in front of the sink and held the little toothbrush in his hand. So small the tiny bristles. Kid sized. 

She was so tiny for her age. Just like Scully had been, or so she’d told him at Emily’s first pediatrician appointment after they’d brought her home. 

He sank to the toilet and held the brush in his hand as tears blured his vision. He could’ve lost her. He had lost her. He could’ve really lost her. Just like Sam. Just like Scully. Her joy, and her innocence, and her fierce fearlessness lost. And it yet again wouldve been his fault. Having to come home to tell Scully. He sat up at the thought rubbing his face, trying to escape it.

Visions of fleeing sprang from deep in his psyche as they did whenever the universe made him aware of just how much of a fuckup he was. 

They’d be better off. He invited chaos into their lives. 

They didn’t deserve that. 

He didn’t deserve them. 

A soft knock on the door told him he’d been in here way too long. 

“Mulder” she called through the door. “Are you okay?”

He wiped his tears quickly but more came. “Yeah” his wobbly voice gave him away.

She opened the door.

And when he looked up at her blinking, life falling apart in his hands, she came to him and knelt between his legs and closed hers around them, holding him together. 

A hand to his cheek, her gentle soothing whisper “Its okay.” 

“No its not. What if she had…” His voice shuddered

“But she didnt, kids get lost in stores, it wasnt anything more than that.” She stroked his hair.

“I was so scared.”

“Oh mulder.” She squeezed his fingers in hers. “I know.” 

And he was bending over to bury his face in her shoulder as she wrapped her arms around his neck. He pulled her onto his lap from her kneeling position. And she breathed an “Oh” in surprise, but only hugged him more firmly, as he tried to calm himself down.

When the tears stopped falling, he asked quietly “Where is she now?” 

“Watching Mr. Rogers or…” She checked her watch. “Lamb Chop probably by now.”

He looked up at her bleary eyed “I’m sorry.”

She shook her head slightly with a sad look on her face. “Theres nothing to forgive, except maybe yourself.” She brushed her fingers on his chin. 

“I don’t deserve you. Either of you” He wanted to give her an out.

She leaned her forehead to his. “Of all the people in the world, you are the only one who deserves us.”

He pulled her fingers to his lips, but couldn’t meet her eyes.

“I’ll say it until you believe it.” She whispered, lips at his ear.

He sighed into her collar bone.

@today-in-fic if this qualifies…

[elstabler]

when mulder comes back from his abduction and sees scully pregnant, his first instinctive reaction is to feel betrayed and hurt because goddamnit they were finally ready, finally so open to explore all that they could be. they were so close to having it all…

but then he understood: he had died! he had died and she hadn’t and she had moved on, she had to. she was right to do so, of course. he always knew he held her back and maybe she had finally learned that too. and now he was back and already sucking her back in, making her spend all the hours at the hospital by his side, not eating not sleeping. and all because she pitied him, pitied the story the scars on his body told and nothing more. he saw it in her eyes.

so he pulled back, he pushed her away the best he could (which was never much but oh gosh he tried). he was cold to her and as confused and conflicted as he felt he thought it was for the best, it was for her.

and scully tried to understand him. after all he had died! he had died and she hadn’t and she knew better than anyone what trauma like that can do to your mind, right?

she thought he didn’t want to hurt her feelings by asking for space to process it all and so she tried to not suffocate him. she gave him time and space. she checked in with him but didn’t press when he didn’t answer. she shielded him from most things from the office. she brushed off his apathy like it didn’t hurt like a motherfucker if she was being honest. she thought it was for the best, it was for him.

but theres just so much a girl can take and a disaster was just around the corner waiting to happen. the breakdown was inevitable.

it happens in one of the many nights she went to his place to check on him and got hit with his usual ‘i’m fine’ crap. she finally snapped.

“mulder stop! just stop! you have no right to do this to me and you know why? because you know exactly how i felt when you were gone, don’t you? when every second feels like an hour and every hour feels like a year. when another day passes and all you can feel when you lay your head in your pillow at night is fear and anguish and failure”

her storm takes him by surprise and he just stands there, sunken stomach and aghast. of course he knew what it felt like. he knew he could never forget the pain of the days she wasn’t with him.

“but you know what you didn’t have to see? my dead body dumped in a field. I had to see that. Did you even consider this for a second?” the rage and hurt in her eyes pierces him, her voice growing louder as she went on “I had to cry over you and beg for it to be a lie. I had to make all the arrangements for your funeral because I needed the closure of a final goodbye. I held your hand for hours till I tricked my mind it was warm again and Skinner had to physically drag me away from you. I dumped the dirt over your casket. I got anxious to go to sleep in hopes i could see you in my dreams only to have recurring nightmares about your body turning into a hard corpse crushing me. I had to go to work every damn day just to keep my mind occupied when i didn’t even know if someone really had my back because i was only ever certain with you. I had to think like you and see things only you ever saw just to make your absence a little less painful"

at this point she was shouting, angrily wiping the tears from her eyes. he made no effort to do the same to his own, eyes fixed on hers. the truth hit him like daggers. she was right, he hadn’t thought about any of that because it was unbearable and he knew if the roles were reversed he wouldn’t have taken half of what she did - he would have ended up committed somewhere or lying next to her seven feet underground.

“I had to curse God over and over asking how could he be so cruel and I had to beg for forgiveness when He showed me all of his mercy and He gave you back to me. I have to swallow the urge to spend every second by your side because i’m scared that when i close the door you will disappear again. Goddamnit Mulder! You have no right to shut me out now! Not after everything!”

His legs finally decided to work again and he crossed the room in a stride, picking her up in the first real, raw, embrace since he returned. she buried her face completely into his chest, craving her nails on his back, bringing him impossibly close. he wallowed his sorrows and begged for forgiveness in her ear. he held her face gently with both his hands, lifting her chin up to urgently kiss her forehead, her eye lids, her cheeks, her tears, the tip of her nose. her lips. and he promised he would never leave again.

they both knew it was a promise he wasn’t sure he could keep, but, for now, it was enough. in that moment, the true mulder, her mulder, was back to her.

[kendallroydefender]

You stayed (Fox Mulder x Reader)

It was an investigation that went wrong and the suspect had fired three shots, two of them missed any target but the third hit Mulder. He was rushed to the operation unit immediately and since then you had been sitting on these uncomfortable chairs next to your co-worker and friend Scully. Both of you didn’t talk much, too scared of what’s to come. She knew about the feelings you harbored for the man. She also knew about Mulders feelings toward you. But even though she encouraged you to talk to him about it or tried to get him to ask you on a date she couldn’t just tell the other. Your leg bounced in anticipation whe the door opened and a man came out.

"I’m doctor Smith. Are you here with Fox Mulder?“ you both stood and you nodded not trusting your voice. "Yes we’re his colleagues. Is- is he… how was..“ Scully tried and the doctor looked at you both "I can’t go in-depth about his condition. But he’s alive and we could successfully perform the surgery. He’s unconscious at the moment. But he should become conscious within the next days.“

You let out a relieved breath. Mulder was alive. "Can we see him?“ you asked hopeful and the doctor gave you a sympathetic look "Sorry, only family members.“ he said "She’s his fiancée.“ Scully quickly said and you gave her a quick look before you understand what she was doing "Yeah- Yes, we’re engaged and I know you said only family members but, look, Fox doesn’t have family that live close by.“ you two looked at the man who glanced at your naked finger for a second "She’s not wearing her ring because we’re not allowed to wear jewelry on the job. It’s too dangerous, you could get your finger ripped off.“ Dana told him instantly. He gave you a long look but the lie seemed to work because he gave a short nod and told you to follow him. Walking behind him to the ICU you turned around and mouthed a 'thank you‘ to Scully.

Tears came into your eyes instantly when you saw him laying there in the hospital bed. "Oh god Fox.“ you said so low it was almost a whisper. "I know it’s shocking to see a loved one like this but we’re pretty positive that he‘ll make it out without complications.“ the doctor said as you sat onto a chair next to him. "He’s a young man in good health - he will wake up.“ Dr. Smith told you. You took Mulders hand in yours. "Hey Mulder.“ you whispered "you really scared me out there.“. The Doc said goodbye to you but you asked him if he couldn’t make a exception and let Dana come too. To your surprise he told you he would see what he could do.

You turned back to Mulder, he looked peaceful like he was just sleeping after a long day at work. "I need you to wake up, there’s so, so much I have to tell you.“ you choked up for a second "I love you Fox Mulder.“ you caressed his hand while tears now streamed down your cheeks. Dana came into the room shortly after and softly touched your shoulder and gave you a sad smile. You two sat with him for a while. When it got late she announced that she was going to leave and asked if you needed a ride back with her but you told her you were probably just going to stay. "I will come back tomorrow. Take care y/n.“ you gave her a small smile "You too Dana.“

You stayed the night sleeping on a chair, waking up every few hours to find the man you grew to love still passed out.

The next day flew by, with check ups on his condition. They’d let you stay in his room for another day after his doctor told the nurses that you were his fiancée. The tv was on but you couldn’t really concentrate on what was going on. Dana came and brought you take out and you stayed another night.

The next morning Scully came back and you two talked for a bit but she soon noticed how tired you were. "Y/n I know you won’t go home but you can take a rest now if you want. I’m here.“ you looked down and nodded knowing she was probably right. "I know he’s important to you - he is for me too. Mulder is though he will wake up but if- if it isn’t in the next days you have to go home. You’re destroying yourself.“ you sniffled "I know but I feel so helpless and I couldn’t sleep at home anyway.“ Scully caressed your arm "What if I don’t get the chance to tell him?“ she squeezed your shoulder "You will be able to tell him, I’m sure of it.“ you nodded hoping she was right.

Scully had read the newspaper for the last few minutes, she looked up to find you still asleep, your head rested on your arms on Mulders bed while you sat in the chair next to it. She smiled sadly, she hoped everything would work out for you and the male agent. She heard a faint cough and her eyes shot up from your sleeping form to the man in the bed. "Thank god Mulder!“ she let out when she realized that Mulder woke up. She gave him some water to drink from a glass next to his bed. "Thanks Scully.“ he said once the coughing stopped. "How long was I gone for?“ Mulder asked "A bit more than two days.“ he nodded

Scully noticed him looking at you with a soft look. You two were hopeless.

"Mulder, she hasn’t left this hospital since you arrived here. She has been waiting for you to wake up for days.“ Scully told the man with an earnest voice. His eyes stayed on the sleeping woman next to him for a few moments before he looked at Scully again. "She stayed here?“ he asked and the woman nodded "Yeah. I mean she went to the coffe and snack machines and used the bathroom to freshen up but she stayed.“ Mulder felt a tug on his heart. He wasn’t used to people going the extra mile for him yet here you were by his side. He knew he would have stayed if the roles were reversed and you were hurt.

"I’ll notify a doctor and you can wake her up I think you two need a few moments for yourself.“ Scully said and Mulder nodded. They hugged and she told him "I’m glad you’re back!“. With a hand on his cheek. When she left the room Mulder looked at your resting form before he lifted a hand and softly pushed a strand of hair out of your face, his hand lingered for a second and you stirred a little before your eyes fluttered open. You blinked a few times before you looked at Mulder and instead of finding him unconscious he was looking and smiling at you. "Fox! Oh god!“ you let out as you sat up "Hey.“ he said and with that you could feel tears well up in your eyes. "Hey.“ you let out "I need to get a doctor.“ you said "Wait, I think Scully already did.“ you looked up "Is she still here?“ he nodded before answering "She left a few minutes ago.“ it went quiet for a moment between you while you were just looking at each other. You couldn’t remember when it happened but you noticed that you were holding his hand in yours. "I’m so glad you woke up.“ you said voiced laced with emotion and Fox gave your hand a squeeze. There was so much you wanted, you needed, to tell him but now was not the right time. The door opened and a doctor came in followed by Scully. "Mr. Mulder welcome back! How are you feeling?“.

While they talked and the man doctor checked Mulder you were listening. You were so relieved when the doctor said he would be fine and that he didn’t think there would be any damages or complications if Mulder stayed a while longer and took things easy for the next few weeks.

You sat with him for a hour more, talking a bit but mostly just basking in the fact that he was with you again. Mulder and you seemed to always find a way to show each other physical affection but now under the circumstances it didn’t have to be under pretenses, so you were happy to be able to hold his hand and him caressing the back of your hand with his thumb. It was just a small moment of intimacy while talking.

"You can go home.“ Mulder said still holding your hand. You shook your head but he spoke up again before you could "Scully told me you’ve been here for days. Go home and get some sleep, have a real meal.“ you looked at your intertwined hands "Fox what if-" he squeezed your hand

"Please Y/n. It’s late and you need to rest. Trust me I appreciate you being here more than I can express and we can see each other tomorrow and we’ll talk. I promise I’ll be here.“ he chuckled and you nodded knowing he was probably right. "Okay. You are probably right. Take care.“ he smiled at you and lifted your intertwined hands to lay a kiss on the back of your hand "You too.“ he whispered. You went to hug him, carefully to not hurt his wound. The hug lasted longer than usual but you were just glad you had him back. Before you could think about it too much you leaned back towards him and pressed a quick kiss on his cheek. Before you could overthink your action you stood up to leave, halting at the door for a moment sending him a smile wich he reciprocated.

This night you could relax the first time since Mulder got hurt. You went home took a hot shower, ate something that wasn’t from a snack-machine and slept in a real bed. It felt good also because you knew he was alive and better.

You went back to see Mulder at lunch the next day. The Hospital had called you earlier in the day to tell you that they were moving him out of the ICU to the regular station. When you stepped into the room Fox was up, sitting in the bed, watching something on the tv and eating a chocolate pudding. "Hey how are you?“ you asked with a smile "Y/n! They called you?“ you nodded your head "Yeah.“ he nodded with an mischievous sparkle in his eye "What’s up with that look?“ you asked cautiously squinting your eyes at him. "Nothing, nothing, just had hoped that it was you.“ he answered to wich you gave him a confused look. "This morning after the doc told me I could leave the ICU they asked me if they should call my fiancée to inform her about it.“ realization hit you and your cheeks warmed "Oh shit right, that’s what we told the doctor so I was allowed in your room.“ you explained. "I would have gotten shot earlier if I knew I would wake up to being engaged to you afterwards.“ he joked and you chuckled while shaking your head "Do not joke about that!“ you scolded him but you weren’t really mad at him.

He scooted over to the side against you’re protest that you would be fine on the chair and patted the space next to him for you to sit down. "What kind of man would I be if I wouldn’t let my fiancée sit next to me.“ Mulder joked and you laughed shaking your head "I will never live this down huh?“

You sat down carefully not to hurt him. "I was so worried - I’m glad you’re doing better.“

You turned to look at him and found his eyes already on you. "Thank you, you know for staying you didn’t have to. But it means a lot.“ Mulder told you "Of course I stayed. I lov-" you stopped and cleared your throat "You are extremely important to me.“ you said instead. He smiled at you "I love you too.“ he told you while nudging your shoulder softly. Even though the two of you said it in a friendly kind of way you couldn’t help your heart from beating faster. Your eyes met his green ones, just looking at the other for a moment. It felt like you were communicating without talking. He glanced down at your lips for a second. There was definitely something, it felt like a pull between you two. No teasing, no jokes. His hand circled your forearm rubbing soft circles onto your skin with his thumb. Heads slowly drifting towards each other.

"Mulder I think I need to tell you something.“ you swallowed

Mulder noticed your eyes wander to his lips for a second and he thought 'now or never' before his hand reached up to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear. "Why don’t we talk later okay?“ His hand lingered before he cupped your cheek. You weren’t sure if you had leaned in first or if he did but his nose nudged yours softly before you both stopped, giving the other an out. But neither pulled back and so your lips touched. It was gentle but it held a lot of unspoken words and even more emotions. In the beginning the kiss was careful - lips moving softly against each other before the kiss grew stronger with more need. He exhaled trough his nose as your hands went up to his hair. You pulled back for air after a few more moments and couldn’t help the grin spreading on your face.

"When I get out of here would you like to go out?“ Fox mumbled against your lips "Yeah I would really like that.“ you answered before you two kissed again.

[leiascully]

Today is the cunnilungus and cake Hollywood. Could I prompt you to write how do you think Mulder and Scully celebrated?

Ah yes, Mulder's favorite holiday.

“I got cake from that bakery,” Scully said, coming into the house and shrugging off her coat. She swapped the paper bag from hand to hand as she shook her arms out of the sleeves. “One for you, one for me.”

“What’s the occasion?” Mulder prowled over, taking the bag from her and opening it to take a whiff as she hung up her coat. “Mm.” He set the bag on the coffee table.

“No reason,” Scully said. She looked up at him, trying not to smile. She could feel she was failing, the integrity of her indifference compromised. She surrendered, smiled, leaned back against the door. He canted toward her like magnets were pulling him closer. “Just felt like a day for cake. An after-dinner treat.”

“Is that so?” he murmured. He put one hand on either side of her, holding her against the door. “What I’m too hungry to wait?”

“I suppose we could indulge,” she said, tilting her head back as he kissed her neck. For long, melting moments they explored each other’s mouths, lips and tongues and teeth and panting breath. He pushed his thigh between hers as far as the tight fabric of her skirt would allow. She undid the buttons of her blouse one at a time and he kissed lower and lower. His knees cracked as he knelt in front of her and pushed her skirt up, rumpling the fabric slowly over her thighs as his hands cupped her legs and then her ass. His eyes widened. He looked up at her, lust and laughter mingling in his expression.

“I could have sworn you were wearing panties this morning,” he said. “I remember wishing you weren’t.”

“I know all about your sweet tooth,” she told him. “I took them off in the car.”

“Scully,” he said in a pleased rumble, and nudged her thighs open. He gazed fondly up at her, stroking one finger along her folds. “You’re so damn hot.”

“Not stale after all these years?” she said wryly.

“Never,” he said, his voice firm, and then he was pushing his face between her legs, spreading her folds wide with his fingers, licking into her. Her eyes rolled back. She let her head loll against the door. Out here, they had no neighbors. She could moan as loud as she wanted. No fellow agents lurking outside, no motel manager to bang on the door with a noise complaint. She could put voice to every sensation that Mulder’s limber tongue was giving her, and it would only make him shiver and tonguefuck her faster.

Mulder ate pussy like it was his one true calling in life. Fuck aliens, fuck cryptids, and double-fuck the truth-with-a-capital-T: cunnilingus superceded them all. Maybe it was his full lower lip, or his clever tongue, or the fact that his face was the perfect shape to ride for an hour while he made her shudder with orgasm after orgasm. The beard burn had been worth it every time. The time they’d been apart, she’d only worn plain black underwear, her cunt in mourning. No toy could compare to Mulder’s magic mouth, and she’d tried more than a few.

God, she was lucky.

He made hungry sounds as his tongue traced delicately around her clit. He was holding himself back, deliberately, and she loved his restraint and wanted to break him simultaneously. She pushed her hips toward him and he drew back just enough to keep that same light pressure. Pleasure sparked through her, brighter and more intense than the warmth his mouth had already kindled in her.

“Be nice, Scully, I like to savor my sweets,” he said.

“God,” she said as his tongue stroked her again, all her witty responses forgotten. “Fuck. Mulder, please.”

“Soon,” he said. Over and over he traced shapes on her clit, patterns she couldn’t begin to understand. She was dizzy with sensation and with need. Her fingers clutched in his hair. She couldn’t understand how he held himself back. She hoped he kept going forever.

“Mulder, I want you inside me,” she said, only half aware of the words. “Make me come, please, make me come so hard.”

His groan was a promise. But he was still teasing her, his touch feather-light. When she pushed her hips at him again, he pinned her against the door with his strong forearms and she gasped.

“I wanted this all day,” she told him. “In the office. Like when we were younger. Bend me over the desk and have me for lunch. I wanted to ride you in that ergonomic chair.” Her cunt ached with the need for release. Her whole body was tingling. She let go of his hair and cupped her tits, her thumbs rubbing idly over her nipples. He growled a little, in reprimand or jealousy, and finally sucked her clit into his mouth. She yelped in delighted surprise. Heat flooded through her body. She came, just like that, shivers turning into shudders as Mulder’s mouth pulled at her sensitive skin.

Mulder picked her up and carried her to the couch, laying her flat and diving between her legs again before she’d even had a chance to come down from her first orgasm. She’d lost her shoes at some point, which was probably good given the way she was digging her heels into his back. No delicacy this time: his tongue was rough, working her smooth, licking from entrance to clit and back. She could feel his mouth sliding against the slickness of her cunt. Her back arched, lifting her hips against his mouth. He sucked harder, until the pleasure was almost pain, and she loved it, her moans sharp and breathy in her own ears.

“Fuck me,” she begged, but he wouldn’t, he didn’t, not until he’d dragged another orgasm out of her. Only when she was gasping through the aftershocks did he fumble his pants open and sink into her, both of them still wearing most of their clothes, his mouth wet with her moisture. She licked the taste of herself off his lips, nipping at him. He flipped them over so that she was on his lap as he knelt, her back pressed into the cushions. She spread her legs wide, taking him as deep as she could, one hand stroking his chest and one hand working her nipple. He had the other breast well in hand as his free fingers stroked her clit. She came again, a shallow ripple, but he groaned as he felt her muscles clutching.

“Let go,” she urged, and he surged up into her, fucking her into the couch. Something about the angle was so, so good. She could feel the pleasure building again, deeper, different. She pushed his hand away from her overstimulated clit.

“Enough?” he asked, his thrusts slowing.

“No,” she said fiercely, squeezing her thighs against his. God, he was so solid inside her, thick and hot like no one else. She could have picked him out, blindfolded at an orgy, just from the feel of him.

“Scully,” he gasped, a warning, and she opened herself to him even more. He pounded into her. She felt the shudder of his hips and the gush of heat as he came, so deep inside her, but fuck, he was hitting just the right spot. She rode him frantically, chasing her pleasure, and he strained up into her, trying to give her what she needed even as his cock started to soften. And oh, there it was, an orgasm that rippled through her like an earthquake, so deep she felt it in her bones. She cried out, a wordless sound of rapture. Mulder moaned, watching her, holding her.

“Yes,” she said, “God, yes,” and she couldn’t stop saying it. The comedown was leisurely, aftershocks shimmering through her. Mulder pulled out of her and lay down on the couch, holding her against him.

“Scully,” he said.

“Mmm.”

“I don’t need cake for my birthday this year. I just want to eat my fill of you.”

She laughed softly. “Sounds like an endurance event.”

“We’ve got time to train,” he teased.

“First, we need to make dinner,” she said.

“You’re right,” he said, though his hands stroking down her ribs suggested round two rather than three courses. “Gotta keep our strength up.” She pushed gently at his chest and he rolled off the couch and gave her a hand up.

“If you want to go clean up and change, I’ll start peeling and chopping,” he said.

She leaned up and kissed him. It had been a long, long road to this place of peace, but they deserved it. He looked at her with shining eyes.

“It’s just a simple veggie pasta,” he murmured, but his smile was tender.

“It’s never just anything with you,” she said lovingly.

“Yeah,” he said, one syllable that held decades of mistakes and mending and sin and sacrifice and joy. Most of all, joy. “Thanks for picking up cake. It’s nice to celebrate sometimes.”

“Cake and cunnilingus day,” she said. “Our new holiday. We can replace all those hodgepodge anniversaries. Start fresh.”

“It rolls off the tongue,” he said with a wink. “So to speak. Although cake and cunt has a certain ring to it.”

She sighed at him, but as she climbed the stairs to the bedroom, she was smiling. Their bedroom. Their house. Their relationship. It was all the sweet she needed.