#i thought they'd stay ambiguous about it

[wildflowercryptid]

i'm playing trough the unova villain arc in pokemas rn and i did not expect them to randomly drop the detail that the in-game events takes place 5 years after bw2.

[captain-huggy-bear]

A Little Misunderstanding

Pairing: Quinn Hughes x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Lil' angsty at points, but ends sweet, lots of mutual pining and two idiots not realising the other is also in love with the other, meddling mothers (for the best this time)

Summary: Your parents assume that Quinn, the man you mention over the phone all the time, is in fact your boyfriend. He's very much not, but Quinn thinks its funny to pretend he is...until it gets a little too real and maybe some truths are told and feelings are aired.

Notes: Thank you to the anon who requested fake dating to lovers with Quinn, I had this idea which is a little different from the usual fake dating so I hope its okay and you still like it 😊

Tried to keep it ambiguous as to where the reader originated from so that us UK girlies can relate as well as anyone else not from Vancouver and/or Canada.

Reminder I typically use UK spellings because I'm English so...don't come at me if you wish I spelt it the US away. If I have to read US spellings all the time, you can handle the odd UK spelling

Totally happy to take requests/ideas/prompts at the moment in my ask box :)

Writing Masterlist

"When does your flight get in?" You balance your phone between your shoulder and ear, picking up a stray sock that had fallen out of your laundry basket as you attempt to tidy your apartment.

"7am your time, sweetheart, remember?" Your mother's voice rings clear down the line, familiar and warm. It's been a while since you saw either of your parents. You having moved all the way to Vancouver, more miles than you could count from your birthplace and hometown around two years ago. You were excited to have them finally able to come out and stay with you for a week, they'd never been to see you, and it had been a while since you'd been able to see your parents, not having time to fly to see them. While you were glad for the move to Vancouver, living in a completely different place away from your family wasn't always the easiest thing in the world. You so often felt like you were having to fend for yourself without much of a support network. Luckily you'd made some good friends in the time you'd been in Van.

"Quinn offered to come with me to pick you and dad up, we'll be there waiting for you so don't worry about getting an Uber." You dropped Quinn's name casually because that's what it was, he was just another part of your existence. Your friend, who admittedly you had a small crush on, but just your friend nonetheless. Just because you thought he was beautiful and wanted to kiss him didn't mean you were allowed to kiss him or that he'd even want to kiss you. He was a friend who happened to be a man and you both happened to be single. This had not changed for two years and wasn't likely to any time soon.

"Oh, Quinn'll be there?" Your mother's voice was suddenly more upbeat, excited. She'd been eager to meet Quinn for months now, you're not sure why she finally took an interest in one of your friends but you can't help but be glad. Quinn had become a massive part of your life, a support network you very much needed when you'd first come to a strange new place all by yourself. He was part of the fabric of your life now, and you knew he'd charm your parents without even thinking about it. It shouldn't matter to you that your parents like your friend, its not like Quinn was your boyfriend, but it did matter to you. You wanted them to like him as much as you did because you wanted him around for the foreseeable future.

"Yeah, I mentioned you were coming to visit the other day and his car is bigger than mine, so he offered to come along, he has to get up early most days anyway so he's not too bothered by it." It helped that Quinn had a couple of days off, but still you were thankful. He could have spent his rare enough free time doing something much more enjoyable than helping you pick your parents up from the airport.

"Your father and I look forward to meeting him, we've heard so much about him, darling!"

There's something about your mother's tone that makes you stop for a second suddenly feeling a little awkward about the whole thing. Maybe it's just how eager she is or maybe it's something else, but there's a little red flag waving in the back of your mind with some small print on that you just can't quite read yet.

"Right...um, look I'll see you tomorrow morning then? I gotta get everything ready for you guys."

"Of course, of course! We love you!"

"Love you too, mum."

"You're sure you don't mind?" You look over at Quinn from the passenger seat, the two of you look exhausted, big bags under your eyes and even bigger hoodies to hide in because a 5am wake up to get to the airport in time was just a little much for both of you. This early in the morning it's still dark and the streetlights do something to Quinn's face that makes him even more handsome than usual, even as he looks like he might fall back asleep at any minute. It doesn't help that his scruff has grown out or that his hair is in those perfect waves he always seems to get even when he's just taken his bucket off.

"I wouldn't have offered if I did, besides the amount of time we spend together isn't it about time I met your parents? You've met mine." He smiles over at you, cheeky, the sort of Quinn most people didn't see. It's silly that it makes your cheeks feel warm, he's just your friend. You shouldn't be flustered by him.

"Your parents are at as many of your games as possible, of course I've met them."

"So are you. Sue me for wanting to meet the parents of one of my best friends."

"I'm your best friend?" You lean your head back on the headrest, tilting slightly to grin at him all silly. Quinn can see it from the corner of his eye and as much as it's ridiculous, that little grin makes you even more beautiful than normal.

"One of." He rolls his eyes at you, partly because of your silliness and partly rolling his eyes at himself. You're his friend. He shouldn't feel this way about you, men can have female friends...he just can't seem to have you as a female friend without wanting to kiss you at any given opportunity. It's becoming difficult, even more so in the early morning when the low light level puts your face in stark contrast and your hoodie, one of his, makes you look so cozy and sweet.

"That's just your way of avoiding admitting how much you love me and need me in your life."

Quinn's cheeks flush bright red, so bright that even the low light can't hide it nor hide the way he bites back a smile at you, eyes fixed on the road and the last few miles to the airport.

"...Shut up."

The silence that fills the car is comfortable, the sort that comes about from spending so much time together. You have friends that aren't Quinn, of course you do, but Quinn had been your first friend in Vancouver. He'd shown you around and made time for you in his incredibly busy schedule. You were often the first person he saw when he came off a roadie and the last person to see him before he left for one. There were nights when you stayed round Quinn's after a game or vice versa. You spent so much time together that you simply coexisted, being around Quinn was as easy as breathing. You rarely argued or disagreed and when you did it was always resolved properly. You simply worked. There wasn't ever much to think about with Quinn. You could just...shut off.

"Thank you, though...seriously." You take a moment, thinking how to word your next few thoughts, your warning as the signs for the airport come into full view, "Just, my mum seems really eager to meet you so...just brace yourself."

"Eager?"

"You know when your parents are excited to meet a new partner?" You think back to the few times you'd introduced a boyfriend to your mum, the excitement that she exuded...it was starting to concern you that she was that excited to just meet your friend. Because that's all Quinn was. Your friend. Not your boyfriend. Your friend, you remind yourself, even as he looks so good smiling over at you with his beard. He'd let it grow out just enough that he looked rugged and mature.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, she's that sort of excited which is really weird...she normally doesn't' care that much about my friends. Just, sorry, if she's really weird about it?" It's awkward enough talking about, you and Quinn have always stayed firmly platonic, you didn't talk about the fact that people assumed you were dating or even the concept of it. Talking about it felt...it felt like you were opening the curtains up, letting him see in a little too far.

"You didn't tell her we were married or something, did you?"

"Quinn! Shut up!" He laughs so loud that you can't actually be that mad at him, not when he's grinning at you like that, not when he's been so stressed as of late about the performance of his team. Even if it's at your expense.

"What? Just checking! For all I know you could have told her we got married in Vegas during one of my games or something?"

"If I'm telling my mum I'm married to you, it'll be because I'm actually married to you, you idiot." You roll your eyes at him, arms crossing over your chest as you turn to look out the window.

"Oh, so you do want to marry me?" He's joking, but he's not...he's thought about it. There's not a day that Quinn hasn't thought about what it would be like to be yours and you be his, not since he met you...and then promptly managed to land himself so far into the friendzone that he was scared to crawl his way out lest he leave you behind in the process.

"...I hate you."

"No you don't." His voice is singsong in intonation and sweet and he's right because you love him and it hurts...god, it hurts how much you love someone you can't have. Someone you see every day, someone who is so deeply ingrained in your life that removing him would be like carving a hole into your own chest.

You just sit and glare at him, even as a heavy sort of sadness hits, as he pulls up into one of the parking bays for collecting passengers.

It's okay that he's just your friend, you remind yourself as you get out of the car. It's okay because he's the best friend you could ask for, he's here at 6.45 am in the morning to collect your parents from the airport, not because he was asked or because he had to, but because he wanted to. You can live with loving him in silence, so long as you always have him around.

"I think they're over this way, probably, near gate 1?" You're just getting your bearings, trying to figure out roughly where your parents will come out at after they find their things from baggage claim when you hear it.

"My baby!" The squeal of a middle aged woman who hasn't seen her daughter in far too long pierces the air. You barely have time to brace yourself for impact before your mother is wrapping you up in a gigantic hug and pressing as many kisses to your face as possible, you know without a doubt her signature mauve lipstick is smudged all across your skin.

Your father stands behind her, rolling his eyes in amusement but the smile he gives you is no less warm, "Hey there, princess."

"Hi, mum, hi, dad," You pull yourself free from your mother just long enough to get a long awaited hug from your father, big and warm and so familiar that you almost feel like crying. How long has it been since you last hugged your dad? Half a year? Nine months? Longer? You sometimes don't realise how much you miss something until you get it back.

When you turn back around your mother is already pulling Quinn into a hug that he accepts, if a tad awkwardly, his hands patting her on the back like he's not quite sure how hugs work.

She has his face in her hands before you can intervene, overly familiar and friendly as she grins up at him like he's made her day just by existing. "You must be Quinn, Y/N's boyfriend..."

"Oh, he's n-" You're pretty sure your eyes bug out of your head, startled by the suggestion because at no point in the last few years of living in Vancouver had you ever called Quinn your boyfriend. Ever.

You're cut off by Quinn who's grinning at you wickedly over the top of your mother's head like he's just been giving the greatest Christmas present he could ever ask for and in that moment you know...you know that he is going to make your life very difficult with this tiny piece of information.

"Yeah, hi, nice to meet, the boyfriend, that's me." God, he wishes it was true. There's nothing more he wants in that moment than to be able to say to your mom that you are 100% his girlfriend, but he can't...he can, however, enjoy the roleplaying while it lasts. He can't really stop himself, not when you look so aghast at your mother calling him your boyfriend, not when he can use this to tease you for at least the next 30 years. He grew up with 2 brothers, sue him for taking advantage of the situation.

"Quinn!"

"What? Am I not allowed to call myself your boyfriend anymore?" He sidles up to you, slipping out from your mother's grip to pull you into his side. His arm rests naturally over your shoulder, yours finding his waist, and it is natural...because you've done this a million times before. The kiss he presses to your hair is new though, different and as much as your mum clearly believes the ruse, you can see your father just looks amused. Something tells you he knows this is all an act, but he finds it enjoyable to watch. Typical. No support from him when you need it most. Dads.

"Oh, she's just grouchy in the mornings, has been ever since she was a baby!" Your mother looks at the two of you with such pride that you're certain her heart actually might break when she finds out Quinn isn't actually your boyfriend. You've never seen her look so happy with your choice in a man before and you're certain she won't be able to cope when you have to inevitably tell her that it was either a) a lie or b) that Quinn just wasn't the guy for you (another lie just to make your life more complicated).

"Mum!"

"Oh don't worry, I know just how grouchy my baby can be in the mornings." This time he presses a kiss to your cheek and when he does, you hiss lowly in his ear, 'I'm going to kill you.' and Quinn can't help but laugh at you, biting his lip at how much fun he's having riling you up.

"Here let me take your bags, Mrs Y/L/N," Quinn's bending down before your mother can even begin to protest, her carry on backpack being slung over his shoulder and pulling up the handle of her suitcase to wheel it behind him.

"Oh, you don't have to, Quinn!"

"I insist." He knows he's making it harder on you, can see the look you give him because he's just going to make your mother fall in love with him. But, even as he enjoys riling you up, he was also raised right and he's not letting your mother carry her own bags.

Your mother hangs back with you while your father and Quinn start walking ahead with the suitcases. She slips her arm through yours walking with you to keep up, as she does so she does a very bad attempt at whispering. The sort of whispering that means you know Quinn can hear every word and is probably enjoying it immensely.

"He's such a gentleman..."

"Yeah, a real gentleman." You mutter sarcastically, watching the way his shoulders rise and fall in a silent laugh that he's no doubt doing his best to swallow down.

"Don't be grumpy, he's just being sweet on you. You should be glad for such a loving boyfriend..." Your mother scolds you before raising her voice back to normal, Quinn and your father slowing down slightly to help keep the four of you together, "So, Quinn, my daughter tells me you're a hockey player?"

"Yeah, you talk about me, baby?" Quinn's grin is wide, and you can't help the warmth that fills your entire face because you can't actually deny it. You talk about Quinn all the time, he's your best friend and whenever your mother phones, you inevitably talk about him. Whether it was a game of his you went to or a coffee place you'd visited together or gala he'd invited you to. Maybe, you talked about him too much? Maybe, it was obvious in the way you talked about him that you loved him? Maybe that's why your mother had made such a large assumption about your relationship status. Maybe this was your fault, why wouldn't she assume you were dating?

"She talks about you all the time. Quinn this, Quinn that...did you know that Quinn did this today and broke this record?"

"Mum..." You groan out, looking to your dad for help but all he does is shrug his shoulders at you, amusement bright in his eyes. Even if he could do something you know he wouldn't because he's clearly enjoying your torture.

Quinn can't help it, the tables seem to reverse. You're embarrassed still, but now he is too, bright red in the face, ears flushed the colour of a fire engine and a hand rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. All because you talk about him to your parents...you talk about him when he's not around...he feels like a twelve year old, giddy because his crush smiled at him for the first time.

"I play for the NHL."

"Vancouver Canucks, wasn't it?" Your mother asks as the four of you step out into the cold Canadian air, her attention making Quinn squirm and you smile, enjoying the discomfort being swapped around for a moment.

"Yeah, I'm the captain of the team." He smiles at your mother awkwardly as he opens the boot of the car and starts to pile in the suitcases, organising them in just the right way that they fit without hassle.

Your father chimes in as he lifts his own suitcase into the back, Quinn helping him shove it back further, "That's impressive, I used to play field hockey myself, never got out of the amateur league but got a few bruises in my time. You had an injury recently right?"

You still remember phoning your mum to talk about it, at first worried and then over time growing more and more frustrated with how sullen Quinn was being. He'd grown restless from not being able to play hockey and you'd been his distraction, a distraction that had grown fed up with his moping no matter how much you loved him.

"I've had a few this year, most recently my hand." He raises his braced hand, the brace a point of annoyance to him at this point in time. He was itching to be done with it, but put up with it because it meant he could still play hockey at the moment.

"Oh, you shouldn't have been carrying my bag then, Quinn!" Your mother fusses over him, flapping about as if she might have a miracle cure for his hand injury.

"Honestly, it's fine! It looks worse than it is, I promise. I wouldn't get away with it otherwise, this one would kill me." He nods his head at you as he closes the boot, opening one of the backdoors for your mother to slide inside.

"Damn right I'd kill you, I cannot take more days of you moping that you can't play hockey and that you're bored despite my amazing company."

"You know I enjoyed spending time with you, sweetheart...but..."

"But, you can't live without hockey, yeah, I know..."

He follows you round to the passenger side door, opening it for you like a gentleman and letting you slide inside. You find yourself enjoying the attention even as you catch your mother's eye in the rear view mirror, a little smirk reaching her lips as she watches Quinn buckle you in. Something he does from time to time when he's feeling particularly sweet...because he was a good friend.

"So, Quinn, how did you meet our daughter? I'm not sure she ever mentioned it?"

The entire ride home is filled with your mother peppering Quinn with questions, encouraging him to talk more and more about your 'relationship'. Everything from when you first met to the first date you went on (which Quinn told her was the first time he took you ice skating, you were under the impression that that was a friendly family skate event and most certainly not a date).

The conversation lulls while you set your parents up in your spare bedroom, helping them settle themselves and showing them around your apartment. They hadn't ever seen it in person and they spent half the time cooing over your choices, the photos of family and friends on the wall, the ones of you and Quinn, as well as your mother checking your fridge and telling you to buy more vegetables.

It's as you're sitting down to a breakfast of pre-bought croissants and pain au chocolat that your mother restarts her question. This time even more invasive than the first.

"So Quinn, when did you know?"

"Mm? Know what?" Your best friend looks at your mother with furrowed brows, taking a sip of his orange juice and almost choking on it when she proceeds to clarify her question.

"When you loved my daughter."

There's a long beat of silence where your eyes stay fixated on your plate, watching your own hands intently as you spread Nutella inside your croissant, far too focused on that to be anything casual or calm. You're certain you're going to be sick because he doesn't love you but you love him and your poor mother is so oblivious and this...this is going too far, it feels like it's gone too far.

"Expected answer or honest answer?"

"Honest answer."

"The second week I knew her." Your head snaps up with a start only to find Quinn looking directly at you, green eyes crinkling softly at the corners. "She heard that I had been hurt on the ice the night before and she stormed round my apartment with a bunch of food, medicine and a blanket. Spent the whole day looking after me and making me watch 90s movies I hadn't watched growing up. No one outside my family had ever done that for me before...it made me realise that if I wasn't already in love, I would be pretty quick." You almost believe him, the way he looks at you, the way he speaks so softly. Almost.

You look down at your plate, tears welling in your eyes because you know he doesn't mean it. He's spinning a yarn for your mother and it hurts that he would go that far when you both know this is all some ruse he's decided to pull. You swallow hard and take a bite of your croissant, refusing to look at him for the rest of breakfast.

You won't meet his eyes until he goes to leave after breakfast, your parents hanging back so you can say goodbye to your 'boyfriend'.

"Mind if I come over after dinner? We could watch a movie with your parents?"

"Quinn..." You go to challenge him on his behaviour today, but the words won't come out.

"What?"

"Nothing...uh, sure, after dinner?"

"After dinner, baby."

You want to tell him off as he says it, as he presses a kiss to your cheek so your parents can see because you aren't his baby and he's hurting you. He's hurting you without realising it because you so desperately want to be his baby. But, you don't. You just watch him walk away down the corridor of your apartment building and out of sight before getting ready to show your parents around Vancouver for the day.

You try to put the whole thing out of your mind throughout the day, showing your parents the sights of Vancouver, including the arena...but it's hard when they keep bringing Quinn back up and asking about your feelings. They probe you for half the day and it's emotionally exhausting balancing the truth with the half-truth, even more so knowing that they're going to be just as disappointed as you are when they realise your relationship with Quinn is just a sham, a charade, a fake.

Eventually they seem to grow bored of talking about the topic, however, and dinner goes relatively smoothly, you taking them to a nice restaurant Quinn had shown you back in your first couple of months in Vancouver. Even that feels bittersweet though, filled with memories of the two of you dining together. You can't help but feel like the whole issue needs addressing as you get them back home and pop a film on ready for Quinn's arrival.

When he arrives he continues the act as if it isn't one, greeting you at the door with a kiss to the cheek and pulling you down onto the loveseat opposite your parents, curling one arm around your shoulders and urging you to lay against him, your cheek pressed into his chest. In some ways it's familiar, not an act, because you cuddle for movies all time, completely platonically of course, but both of you are touchy feely and it's always been part of your dynamic. In others though? The way he talks to you, the pet names, kisses to your hair, that is all new, all a way to show your parents he's the 'doting boyfriend', even though he's not your boyfriend at all.

Your parents lap it up, every now and then you catch them smiling at each other and then over to the two of you and you can't help but feel heavy with it. With this feeling of unrequited affection. You love Quinn, you've known that for a while now, but it was easy to be around him because you didn't need to address it. You could love him in silence and from afar...you had never considered how hard it would become when what you wanted most was being dangled in front of you like a carrot on a string.

Quinn has a similar dilemma going on in his own head. He's always known he loved you more than a friend, even when you barely knew each other...had he been braver he would have asked for your number for a date that first day, not so that he could show you around a new city as a 'friend'. But, he'd been a coward and since then he'd continued to be. He enjoyed every ounce of affection he got from you, every hug, every cuddle, ever time you held his arm at an event, all while feeling like that had to be enough...now he's had more? He's not sure it'll ever be enough, he's greedy for you. Greedy for your affection, your attention, greedy in the way he wants to keep kissing you, keeping calling you sweet names and greedy for the way you grow bashful. Greedy for more than just being your friend...he's given himself a taste of what life could be like and now he can't forget it.

It's halfway through the movie, your legs slung over Quinn's lap and his fingers carding through the ends of your hair when your parents stand with a groan from the other couch.

"Princess?" You lift your head to look at your father, who's stretching out his back after sitting for so long.

"Yeah, dad?"

"Your mother and I are getting a little tired...we're going to go to bed, if that's alright with you two?"

"Of course, don't let us keep you up." Quinn confirms your own thoughts as well, telling your parents it's not problem at all. It's all so...so domestic.

Your dad presses a kiss to the top of your head, as does your mother, before yourself and Quinn wish them goodnight. You wait until you see the door to the spare room start to close, not waiting for it to do so fully, before turning to Quinn. You pull out of his arms, the missing warmth of you an immediate loss to him, but it has him sitting up straight and taking you seriously.

Your face is sullen, sad, eyebrows pinched, mouth turned down into a frown and he's alarmed to see that your eyes are glassy like you might cry.

"Why on earth would you let my parents think we're dating? Why would you tell my mother you're in love with me?" You're certain you're going to cry, angry, frustrated and sad all in one. Lovesick because it hurts to hear him tell your mother he was in love with you when you know he's not.

"Why not?" He frowns at you, hands reaching out but you keep just out of reach as if touching him is the last thing you want. You've never shied away from Quinn's touch and he recoils, breathing a little heavier out of anxious worry that he's upset you, that he's fucked this up. Maybe you've been uncomfortable with his touch all day? Has he been making you uncomfortable all day? Is he one of those guys?

"Because we're not dating and you're not in love with me, Quinn. My mother is certain we're going to get married and I'll stop being an old spinster! You're getting her hopes up." The unspoken words lay heavy on your tongue, 'you're getting my hopes up', you want to say.

"Who said I didn't love you? Who said I didn't want to marry you?" The look he gives you isn't the cheeky one he's had all day, it's not joking or silly, it's dead serious. He scoots closer to you, but doesn't reach out for you this time. But, Quinn can't help but want to be close to you, to be drawn into your orbit, into your gravity.

"Quinn..."

"What?"

"You're being mean..." Your voice is filled with tears, wet, pathetic sounding and you choke back a sob as a tear falls down your cheek because he's being so mean...he can't dangle that in front of you, everything you've ever wanted, not when he doesn't actually mean it.

He realises in that moment that you don't believe him. You believe he's spent the entire morning and evening telling lies, saying that he loves you when he doesn't, that you're that important to him when you aren't. You believe he's being mean because you don't believe him, that the tears are because you think he's holding this thing, this idea out in front of you, only to snatch it away.

"Look, I said a lot today...but none of it was a lie." He can't help himself this time, hand coming up to cup your cheek, thumb wiping away that pesky tear that shouldn't have been there in the first place. It's the way you lean into his touch that brings him a sense of confidence, of relief, you wouldn't do that if you didn't want him touching you.

"I know our first date wasn't a date, just a stupid family skate I was too scared to ask you out to as more than just a friend. I wish it had been a date and I wish I had been brave enough from the start to tell you I didn't just want to be your friend."

"Quinn..."

"And I was telling the truth...when your mother asked me when I fell in love with you." He tugs you closer, until your legs are back over his lap and your practically sitting on top of him, arms wrapping around your lower back and pulling you closer. The way he stares up at you is nothing short of reverent.

"Q..."

"The second week we knew each other you came to look after me when no one else did...and I knew...I knew that I was going to love you and that I was stupid for not asking you out in the first place...but I was...I was too scared to say anything. I didn't want to lose my new friend...I thought..." He hesitates, tongue coming out to nervously brush against his bottom lip, capturing your attention like a magpie with a shiny button.

"You thought?" You're whispering, quiet as if to speak any louder might scare him, might disrupt this little bubble you've found yourself in.

"I thought having a tiny bit of you...any bit, was better than having none of you at all." Quinn confesses, shifting you on his lap as your legs fall either side of his hips until you're so close your noses brush.

"Is it?"

"It was...for a bit..." It's self-deprecating, sardonic, like he finds himself ridiculous, foolish.

"And now?"

"And now I've had a taste of what it's like to love you, to be able to kiss you and hold you...call you mine...and now I'm greedy and it's not enough...Baby, it'll never be enough."

"You...you love me?" It's like even after all of this, everything he's said, every tender touch, you still don't quite believe him. It's hard to believe that everything you've ever wanted is sat in the palm of your hand just waiting for you to capture it, to take it. That your feelings, the ones you believed were unrequited for two years, were actually returned all along.

"I love you...and...um, if...if you'll have me, maybe I could be your real boyfriend this time?" His face is bright red, so warm to the touch when you're fingers reach out to trace his cheeks that you're surprised he doesn't combust.

"I'd like that...I...I love you too,"

"So...I'm your boyfriend?" He says it like he doesn't quite believe it, the beauty mark on his cheek moving as he grins up at you giddy like a little kid getting his first bag of sweets.

"You're my boyfriend." You press a kiss to that beauty mark without overthinking it...because you can now, because now it's not a lie when you tell your parents he's your boyfriend, because now you're allowed to kiss him and hold him and tell him how much you love him.

"Fuck...that sounds good."

He can't help but just stare up at you from where you're straddling his lap. The healthy glow to your skin, the soft smile directed down at him, the way you seem to curl into him like you're not close enough even now. God, you're beautiful and you're his...you're finally his and he's yours and...and he can't comprehend that the thing he wanted to happen for so long has finally happened. What had he been scared of all this time? He could have been with you for two years, instead he'd squandered it out of fear...

"Quinn?" Your voice is soft, melodic, so so sweet that almost closes his eyes at the sound.

"Yeah, baby?"

"Kiss me?" You whisper as if it's shameful to ask, as if you've asked for something more sordid than a simple kiss...your first kiss together at that.

"Anything for my girl."

He's gentle in the way he cups your neck and jaw with one large hand, thumb pressing just below your jaw bone as he pulls you in. There's nothing rushed about the way Quinn presses your lips together, the smooth glide of his bottom lip against your top. Even the way his tongue brushes against your lip until you open up for him is slow, steady, adoring. You can't help the way you sigh into him, fingers gliding through dark chocolate strands, eyes closing shut with the sense of home, sense of relief that you find in him.

The two of you lose yourselves in each other, slow kisses, wandering hands, nothing too extreme, but a new found intimacy that you're finally allowed to indulge in before you curl back up together to watch the remainder of the movie. Watch being a loose term for what you're really doing.

"Did you know?" Your father turns his eyes away from the scene outside the spare bedroom, the way you're curled up in Quinn's arms like you were always supposed to be there. Neither of you realising that the spare bedroom door had never fully closed, both your parents eavesdropping like Samwise Gamgee.

"That they weren't actually together, dear?" Your mother looks sly and devious as she looks over at her husband. The face of the woman he loves, but also fears in equal measure.

"Yes."

"Of course I knew...but I figured they could both use a shove in the right direction, I mean, look at them?" Your parents both turn to watch the two of you, the way you curl up together on the couch is the epitome of young love. There's no real watching of a movie happening, instead Quinn's fingers are rubbing circles into your shoulder, while you look up at him lovingly from where you're curled against his chest. Every now and then he dips his head down to press a kiss against your forehead, and each time you giggle, face pressing briefly into his neck. The giddy feeling of a new, fresh love, making film watching the least of your interests.

"They just needed a little push." Both your parents smile at each other even as your father playfully scolds his wife, "You're a meddlesome woman."

"And you love me for it."

"Yes, yes I do."

Perhaps it took a bit of meddling, a fake misunderstanding, but that would be their little secret...at least for now. Your mother was rather looking forward to seeing you squirm in the future as you reveal the truth, that you hadn't actually been dating Quinn as long as you said. Yes, she certainly was happy to help, but she also was still your mother and lying to your mother was certainly not the done thing. A little squirming was good for you sometimes, but first, she'd let you enjoy the fresh bloom of love...and she'd go easy on you.

[copperbadge]

how did u psych urself up to go to therapy? my executive function has been awol for like 2 years and it's gotten to the point where it's wrecking my ability to do anything. i'm scared to waste a bunch of time and money going and getting told i'm just lazy or that the problem is just me

Happy to talk about that! But this is really two issues, so I gotta do a fly-by real first on "scared of getting told I'm just lazy". :D

It sounds to me like you're aware intellectually that laziness isn't the issue. You know this is an executive function issue and not a personal flaw, but I definitely get that it's hard to internalize that. So I'm going to drop links here to some discussion of "laziness":

How do you know you're not just lazy? (ask sent to me -- it's long, but you can skim for the laziness bits if you want.)

Lack of motivation means you are avoiding pain (second ask in response to the first)

Laziness Does Not Exist by Devon Price

These are essentially my proofs when I want to remind you that laziness is a label that stigmatizes an innate behavior -- inability to act is real, laziness is not. If a therapist tells you that you are lazy, and ESPECIALLY that you are the problem, you should fire that therapist. Don't even stay the rest of the session if you don't want to, just say "I see we are not compatible," and bounce. I don't think the odds are high that you'll encounter that, but on the off-chance that you do, that's a bright neon sign that they're a bad therapist.

In fact I would open with that pitch: "I'm struggling with executive function and the self-perception that I'm really just lazy. I need help with the actual executive function issues but also with how I view myself because of them." The therapist's response will tell you a lot about whether they'd be a good fit.

So with that out of the way...

I eased myself into therapy with the speed of a small child entering an extremely cold lake. It helped a lot that all of my therapy has been virtual via Zoom, so a lot of stuff that would have been a barrier, like going to the physical appointments, discomfort in a strange space, etc. were swept away.

I didn't even want to see a psychiatrist for my Adderall prescription, but I knew I needed help and medication seemed to be my best option, so with the assurances of several people that it wasn't therapy so much as mental health maintenance, I saw a psychiatrist. And he was lovely! (I just met with him yesterday to go over my next few months of scrip.) For a while that was all I did: talked every month to a kind person who asked specific and measurable questions about my mental health -- mood, sleep patterns, ability to work, hobbies -- without getting especially personal. I thought, okay, I can handle this, I can probably handle more, so I asked him for a recommendation for a therapist.

He looked at the network of independent practitioners he belonged to (Clarity Clinic Chicago, if you want an example of a good network) and found me a couple of options. I got extremely lucky to find someone I felt was appropriate for me right out of the gate, though some of that was also knowing what criteria I had: I wanted someone who explicitly stated they specialized in adult ADHD and disability, and who seemed like they were interested in addressing a whole person and not a single issue. When we met she seemed nice, wasn't pushy or judgey, was familiar with spoon theory and disability activism because she also has ADHD, and didn't blink (or ask overly invasive questions) when I said I was very uneasy about therapy because of past experience. She was comfortable with the ambiguity I brought -- I basically said "Look, I think this is something I need but I'm not entirely sure what my goals are yet, it's just I only recently found out I have ADHD and I am rethinking a lot of stuff," and she was like fine, let's rethink it together.

It still took me a long time to start talking about anything meaningful, but she handled the non-meaningful stuff as if it was serious and important, which helped. Admittedly I have really good insurance so I pay $20 a session for therapy, which also helps; it's pretty negligible in terms of health costs for me. I can afford to dawdle.

So, all that said...my path may not be an option for you, but I think it indicates the kinds of options you have. You don't have to jump into serious and heavily emotional processing first thing if you don't want to. You can shop around for therapists and you can drop any bad ones you encounter speedily, or if you find one you immediately like you can still spend time getting comfortable before dropping into the heavier stuff.

I would suggest that if you have a prescribing psych or doctor for any kind of mental health meds, ask them if they have a recommendation. If you don't have that, ask around people you know or believe have access to therapy and see what they think. If those aren't available to you or you're uncomfortable with that, I'd do a search for licensed therapist and your health insurance, or see if your workplace has an employee assistance program that can recommend you someone.

Good luck! I hope you get what you need. Lord knows I've been there.

[nagarashi]

Well... I didn't think it would ever happen, but Rouge Trader somehow managed it.

(Some thoughts on Heinrix's romance... Lots of words.)

Going through the game I was highly impressed by the emotions I experienced. Especially the romances in the game. I never thought that I would like a character like Heinrix so much that I would go out of my way to be a Heretic for him. The unexpected and strong sympathy for him in general was a real surprise for me, as I like assholes like Marazhai (even though he turned out to be a romantic at the end).

But master interrogator, God, I was so impressed by him. He's a real knight, literally and figuratively. He says he wants to protect you, and he can do it, but the funny thing is that he makes you want to protect him so badly.

His romance is very tart and tender. And maybe it's just me, but there's something so elusively grim about it.....

Heinrix is a master of torture and it's very symbolic that in his romance with him, this very tenderness acts as a kind of torture weapon in Heinrix's hands for both of you, whether he realises it or not.

He doesn't reciprocate you sufficiently for a long time and at the same time doesn't give you a categorical refusal, constantly forcing von Valancius to smash against the wall of his commitment to duty, but then to start looking for a breach in it again. One can imagine how emotionally draining that can be. Intentionally or not, he gives you hope and at the same time takes it away time after time.

But I'm also quite willing to concede that Calcazar's interference is probably to blame. I'm sure that on his first visit to Footfall, Heinrix reported that RT was taking a strange interest in him. If I were the Lord Inquisitor, I would certainly take advantage of that to keep my agent as close to RT as possible, from where more can be heard and seen.... In bed. Ideally.

And Calcazar definitely knew about their "relationship" already at the time of Act 2, which is evident in his ambiguous words "don't forget you have an Inquisition agent in your bed", wanting to demonize Heinrix in the eyes of von Valancius, so that she stops trusting Heinrix, suspecting that all his feelings are nothing but lies, as well as stories about his sad past. Probably Calcazar began to realize that he was slipping out of his grip and decided to give up this pawn and undermine her trust at the same time.

The game unfortunately never explicitly stated this (I was hoping it would be, to be honest), but I think this sort of thing happened. The game is open to interpretation here....

In any case, the Lord Inquisitor's words become one more drop in Heinrix's already shaken psyche, which becomes especially noticeable further on...

Speaking of his mental state.

There's no mental health to speak of... It's hard to stay without "scars" when you've literally become the black sheep of the family. And the people you loved become strangers, cutting you out of their lives as if you never existed.... and now they'd be glad you didn't. You're no longer a person, but a stain on their family name that they want to wipe away. They mutilate you by stripping you of your implants, literally tearing out pieces of you, as if you were not a living being, but an unnecessary thing with useful screws. Seems to me, though, that Heinrix wasn't particularly loved as it was, considering he was nearly executed for simple childish stupidity.

After such shocks at a young age, it is hard to keep any faith in yourself (or anyone else). Obviously, this created an incredible vacuum inside, which Heinrix could not fill in any way and with anything. And even though he had grown up and lived for many years, there was still that unloved boy inside of him who longed for love (which again is seen further on). The problem with something like this is that over the years such problems get worse and can often take on a rather unhealthy form without proper treatment. To top it all off, this creates a terrible contradiction inside, in which Heinrix subconsciously desires to be loved, but this desire is constantly suppressed by a multitude of factors... His work, his firm belief that he's a mistake and doesn't deserve love, that he's dangerous because he's a psyker. Speaking of work... Given his craft, it's also safe to assume that part of his humanity was sacrificed long ago, in a sense it "turned him off".

Heinrix constantly lives in control of everything around him and himself first and foremost. It also drains a man psychologically and physically over time.

And now imagine that in the life of such a person suddenly appears someone who looked at him not as a terrible agent of the Golden Throne and not even as a psyker, but as a living person with feelings, with whom you can not just satisfy your needs, but feel something more.... A person who is attracted to you not because she finds you beautiful, but because it's you. She wants to spend time with you, talk to you, literally always happy to see you, want to touch and hold your hand, say kind words, listen to you, wants to... care for you, love you.

Heinrix, as a man who has been deprived of such things for years for his own reasons and the reasons of those around him (well, who in their right mind would want a serious relationship with an inquisitor?) this sudden attitude must be like.... a sudden downpour in a desert where it never rained!

One could only guess how it disarrayed and further brought discord inward as he saw that RT had no thought of stopping, and he had to fight himself, fight for his control, which was slowly beginning to surrender...

This was something completely new, something he wasn't ready for, but had always wanted...

The fatal step is Commorragh, the place where everything starts to go wrong.

Nothing like death to motivate. Heinrix will try to keep the line between himself and Von Valancius, but if she's a little harder, then...the interrogator will surprisingly easily throw off the muzzle and personally erase the last line that separated you from each other.

After that everything changes, Heinrix is no longer willing to hold back his desire for RT, because he has now tasted it like a wolf tasting its first blood. Whereas before he would have done anything to end it, even if RT hated him, now, you can hear how weak his voice is when he expresses doubt that RT would want to continue the relationship.... and the hot relief in his voice when she agrees to continue. You can now easily hear the change in his tone when addressing his beloved. It's obvious, of course. But how his rhetoric has also changed. There's a special adoration for her in his voice and words. It's such a contrast to the Heinrix we knew before the Commorragh. It's like he's been replaced... He says that he often thinks of her, how he is ready to neglect business in order to be with her for a while longer, revels in the thought of her touch and her beauty....

And then there's that date where he suddenly starts saying again that they can't have a future together. He says this to the woman he's asked to continue their relationship this time. What is this? Suddenly sobering up, or...  just a boy who wants to feel his beloved beating for his heart again, wanting to give him her love? Wanted to hear the words of how she wanted to be with him against all, again, one more time so that he could reward her with his closeness? Hmm...

Yes, I'm suggesting that he may well have used manipulation. Whether consciously or not, it's harder to know.

Now, with that assumption, let's remember the Freeze scene.

This scene also shows the full extent of Calcazar's influence, which may have caused RT to doubt the genuineness of Heinrix's feelings. Combined with everything that has already happened in the story, Heinrix simply has a breakdown, he finally loses what remnants of control he still had, his life literally falling apart in his hands because of everything he has learnt.... and now von Valancius, what if now she's doubting him? What is there to go back to now? How can he show how much he cares for her, how much he needs her.....

Heinrix literally comes to RT to kill himself in front of her. She needs to see how much he needs her help. He wants to be saved by her hands.... Unconscious manipulation? Maybe. A scream for help? More than that. An attempt to prove that all his feelings are true and she has nothing to worry about? Definitely. But if there's nothing to worry about, why does his "forever" sound so creepy? ..... ?

Yeah, after RT gets involved, Heinrix does something crazy.... He declares he's quitting the Inquisition, he's not afraid of the consequences... any of the possible consequences. He has literally become blind to everything except his desire to be with RT. He even ignores her concerns.

Heinrix, at this point, is more than ever like a man who has never tasted alcohol in his life and then once tasted it became a hopeless alcoholic. He's intoxicated with a feeling he's never known before, the vacuum that was inside him turned into a bottomless void that devoured more and wanted more, craving that euphoric feeling of being wanted and loved.

And when he says they're gonna be together forever. it sounds like a real unhealthy obsession, because the Heinrix we knew never said anything like that. Or maybe he's just always been like this and finally got to show the real him? He accepts his "new" self - a heretic and an oath-breaker - extremely calmly. Even with some irony in his voice, as if he always knew it would happen and just waited... It's impossible to just forget about whole decades of his past life so indifferently.

And he never once asks if RT even wants that forever? He always puts her in front of a fact that she only has to accept... whether it's him leaving the Inquisition or wanting to always be by her side, whether she wants it or not.

.... or not.

Yes, RT could break up with Heinrix and then we might hear from Idira that something is wrong with Heinrix, the voices tell her that something frighteningly monstrous is going on in his head that has never happened to him before. So you wonder what's going on in his head..... Maybe he's thinking about trying to kill himself again or... bring her back by force? By brute force or using his position in the Inquisition? There's no way to guess...

Not to mention the responsibility he puts on RT, because he gave up his past life for her and she wouldn't let him kill himself. We're responsible for those we tame, aren't we?

It's like he's thrown more shackles on her....

Even in the epilogue in which he becomes the Master of Whispers, the fact that he is always there for RT is emphasised. Not about what happened with them then, after the end of the story, not about whether he became part of the dynasty by becoming RT's companion or anything else, but again the emphasis on his desire to be with her, reminding of his "forever".

You know, there's a song one "Mir allein" by Subway to Sally, Heinrix has a good chance of being a character in that song.

It's funny, but if you think about it that way, Marazhai seems even healthier to me than Heinrix XD

I'm sure it's all just my speculations and everything is much simpler) But if it's not, then.... I will only love Heinrix more as a character, because hiding something dark under the wrapper of a knightly romance, that's what I love.

... ... and I still love him :D

[cozymoko]

Let us test your patience now! How about ROMANTIC yandere headcannon or fic for our mutual fav kaname with a human day class darling? Cucu- 🌕 anon

YAN. KANAME KURAN WITH DAY CLASS S/O

Note: Lmaooo. PS: writers block is killing me. o(╥﹏╥)

Pairing: Kaname Kuran x GN! Human s/o

WARNING(S): Yandere themes, manipulation, bad writing

Want more? → Vampire Knight Masterlist

Being his partner, you're destined to live a lavish lifestyle. Gifts have become an everyday occurrence between the two of you. It's his way of leaving his mark on you, gifting you with jewels and pricey trinkets, though he'd never tell you that. When noticing him with a matching one of his own, your relationship should be clear as day.

St. Xocolatl's Day was something he cared little about prior to his relationship with you. However, it was somewhat of an obligation to attend (to get to his classes). As he exited the gates, his eyes were quick to find you as they'd always have been. You stood near the end of his line, patiently waiting your turn. Little did you know, that was enough to make his heart swoon.

You were a bit reluctant to throw out the chocolates. This day came only once a year and you wished to eat to your heart's content. The variety of chocolates wrapped in colorful, florescencent plastics that were just as eye-catching as you'd expected. But from the looks of it, you wouldn't get to try any.

“Do these hold some importance to you?”

If you had not been his lover, you would've found it to be a genuine question. But the hint of dismay swimming in his usually calm gaze was a dead give away. He looked like a kicked puppy, an expression that was strictly reserved for your eyes. You were quick to shake away his worries, pushing the wrapped goods into his open arms.

The only one that remainded was his own, marked with such intricate and neat calligraphy that only he was capable of.

~~~ To my dearest, {Name}, whom I miss terribly. ♡

Every. Aching. Moment

Kaname is not one to shy away from his feelings, especially the ones involving you. The relationship you share is ambiguous, to say the least. The adoration and infatuation in his gaze are evident, and yet he's willing to keep it a secret for the sake of your reputation. Frankly, he's quite the selfish man, and at times he can't help but act rashly when it involves you.

The Pureblood wants to possess you and everything you are. He can hardly keep his hands off you as is, and the scarce amount of time you spend together only fuels his cravings. But with a little interference, I'm sure he could pull some strings. He is a Kuran after all, what can't he do for you?

Whether he wants to admit it or not, humans are very fragile beings. If he so chose to, he could slaughter thousands with just a mere snap of his fingers. At times, he wishes to do just that. After all, you had always been surrounded by other morals who practically jumped at the opportunity to suck away your time — Leeches, that's all they are. Blood-sucking leeches (hypocrite).

It's a shame he can't stay with you for the entirety of the day. During your absence, he's grown rather irritable with those beneath him. “Sharing you,” or rather your time, is and shall remain one of his least favorite pastimes. Truthfully, the thought of turning you into a vampire has crossed his mind more times than he'd care to admit.

“It's been quite some time since our last interaction. Are you avoiding me, {Name}?” His words came out as a feeble whisper, with how close he was to you, that was more than enough. “You've been spending far too much time with those in the day class and frankly, I've grown a bit jealous.” His warm breath grazed the shell of your ear as he gently rested his hand along the small of your back.

“Can't I be a little selfish? Just this once.”

Your relationship is bound to spark the interest of the aristocrats roaming the night class. It's not everyday they see the Great Kaname Kuran grow so soft for a mere human. Only a fool wouldn't be able to see how tightly you have him wrapped around your finger. But the real question is why?

Oh what a shame, no one will truly understand why. Those who've tried weren't fortunate enough to make it back. Their death being by the hand of a Pureblood who are they to say anything? In their eyes, your situation remains an anamoly regarding the many faces of Kaname Kuran. Though it seems he's not too keen on playing nice when you're involved.

An immortal life can be a blessing and a curse. Even so, it happened to be one thing Kaname wouldn't wish to liveanything. You've spoiled him far too much, at this rate you'll be a vampire in no time!

[dollsome-does-tumblr]

some wwdits finale thoughts--

i found that okay but wasn't nuts about it. i feel like i would've liked to see it strike a more tender emotional note with most of the characters. (i get the "they never change~!" argument, but i feel like it's somewhat at odds with the show itself, and there have just been so many good earnestly touching moments throughout the years that i definitely wanted more of those here at the end!) wanted more laszlo and nadja and maybe a fond little farewell to their iconic marriage. it kind of shocked me that laszlo, nadja, and colin were left so in the background while guillermo and nandor got so much of the ending. (though i can't complain because i love them dearly and i do think of them as the two main characters of the series, and the characters who changed the most, even if they can't tell they did.)

i did enjoy the ambiguous nandermo of it all (although i wish they would've hugged 😢 they both needed a hug and i needed them to hug, okay), and i especially liked that guillermo "decided to leave" to give the documentary some closure but then immediately came back to be like, "jk, HEY BESTIE!" because guess what! guillermo's life doesn't always have to be sacrifice! guillermo can have what he wants! he can embark upon a new life out in the world AND stay in his weird thing with nandor and his vampire besties! and, i guess, fight crime and do things in the shadows with nandor in their underground lair!

also cute that nandor and guillermo ended up in bed (well, in coffin) together at the end of the episode, just like nadja hypnotized us into imagining as the most perfect ending we could possibly imagine with our simple little human minds! (that's the one us hulu viewers got, anyway!) i did definitely earnestly believe for a second there that they were gonna make out in the coffin instead of what actually happened. le sigh!

random thoughts:

was nadja dolly in this episode (aside from the rosemary's baby hypnosis) and i just forgot from finale brain scramblies? i felt like i was missing her.

feeling like they could've done more with the monster and, idk, tied that to the theme of this season a little more somehow (whatever the theme of this season was). i just feel like something got left hanging there. maybe something to do with laszlo and colin and parenthood and daddy issues.

nandor's continued crush on the guide why?? you know what, i won't stress over it. i'll just cling to the fact that he committed so hard to his life with guillermo that he somehow made the underground lair happen.

wish they'd called back to guillermo's vampire slayer powers more somehow. i just feel like we needed way more of that!

i wish we could've seen seanie and charmaine and the baron and the sire again :'( like maybe they could've thrown a viewing party of the documentary at the end!

also: omg, i want more about the documentary (or documentaries)! who are these maniacs out here making multi-year documentaries about vampires and what role are those documentaries supposed to play in society?? they should've given us at least a little bit more about that! come on!

i think we need a movie to wrap up these loose ends and finally provide a nandermo embrace. a movie and six seasons and a movie, if you will.

p.s. JACKIE DAYTONA! i am also pretty tickled by the thought that the events of "local news", perhaps the most chaotic and deranged episode, happened twice.

p.p.s. NANDERMO BAD GUY FIGHTING SPINOFF PLS!

p.p.p.s. headcanon: nandor and guillermo both watch the finale episode someday and envision the sitcom-marrieds dream sequence as their perfect hypnotized ending. are forced to confront their feelings at last.

[matan4il]

Hey! Anon from the last time here! By "Pro-Palestine Westeners" I was partially referring to all these students from Columbia and MIT who were illegally occupying the school grounds and harassing/hurting the actual Israeli/Jewish/Middle Eastern/the other generally decent students.

I know there's Pro-Palestine people who are actually decent, but all these college students are risking suspension/expulsion/jailtime because they'd rather chant pro-Ha*as slogans rather and listening to news from biased fonts rather than educating themselves on what's really happening. Some people would rather stay in their ivory towers, rather than going outside and touching grass.

I also know there's LGBT+ people in Palestine and other parts of MENA, and all I wish for them is that they live long enough to find a place where to live freely and out of the closet, without suffering persecution from their government.

Hope this clarified at least a little bit my other ask, and sorry it sounded so ambiguous. Finally, let's hope that Eden Golan gets at least in the top 5 at Eurovision 2024, just to spite anyone who booed her.

Hi Nonnie!

Thank you for sending this ask to clarify the previous one, it's what I thought you meant, and I'm glad to hear I wasn't too off.

TBH, as a gay woman myself, with gay Palestinian friends who are a part of my queer community, and whose struggles I know well, that's the first group I thought about as well. Then I thought about the fact that under Hamas law, husbands can rape their wives with impunity. I thought about the way the Christian population (the biggest non-Muslim minority under Palestinian rule) has demographically plummeted in the areas that Israel passed on to Palestinian control as a part of the Oslo accords. I thought about black people, whose ancestors were kidnapped because of the Trans-Saharan (i.e Arab) trade slave, and are still treated as lesser humans because of that (based on their skin color, they are still referred to in Arabic to this day as "Abeed," meaning slaves).

I think this last group, which most people don't even realize exists, deserves a bit more info shared about it:

Pretty sure black activists in the states, who don't know the history (and present) of the Arab slave trade, or the persisting anti-black racism that exists in Palestinian society, have no clue they're being exploited against the same Jewish community, which stood with Martin Luther King Jr. and the civil rights movement, even having some of its members paying with their very lives for this. I hope they wake up and realized they're being used for antisemitic purposes by the same people who enslaved and are still discriminating against some of their people.

But it's funny how the world's activists and human rights defenders seem to ignore the plight of these marginalized Palestinians, isn't it? Almost like, because they're NOT being oppressed by Jews, rather by fellow Palestinians, and can't be used to justify antisemitic rhetoric and action, then they don't count. So much for minority solidarity and intersectionality, right? It doesn't extend to Jews, and it doesn't extend to Palestinians who can't be weaponized against Jews.

Regarding the last bit of your ask, bless you for being hit with Apollo's dodge ball and predicting Eden making it into the top 5, despite every effort made by the jury members of so many countries, the awful people in the audience, and members of fellow delegations. It was magnificent!

Sending you hugs! xoxox

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

[musette22]

I agree with that other anon about changing scenes in Civil war. I think I read that the movie had reshoots so that's where they made the scenes less gay, and I'm pretty sure I read that the Sharon kiss was added in later, again to make the movie less gay.

Honestly, it makes me really feel, not just for all the fans, but also for Chris and Seb. Imagine working so hard as an actor, putting so much thought and effort and love into your characters and their story . . . and then the studio cuts your scenes down and gives most of your story to other characters. That interview where Chris talked about his scenes with Seb being shortened breaks my heart. He looks so annoyed, and I don't blame him. It was supposed to be his movie, his and Seb's.

I often think about what it would've been like if Chris and Seb were in charge of their characters. They care about Steve and Bucky so much, and both of them were fine with it being a love story, so I imagine they would've given them a much more satisfying storyline. I'm so grateful to Chris and Seb, for working with what little they were given and giving it their all despite that. As sad as it makes me, I do find it funny that in scenes where marvel tried to make it less gay, it doesn't really work because Chris and Seb still play them as being in love.

(And really, marvel is so stupid. Not only for wasting two talented actors with insane chemistry, but also for alienating a good chunk of the fanbase. They would've made so much money and gained so much popularity and respect if they'd made stucky canon. They should know insulting the fans never works. Even people who weren't really stucky fans saw that the natural thing to do with their storyline was to make them official. It's just so, so stupid.)

Sorry for this rant. Hope you have a good day and think good thoughts about our boys.

Oh yeah, I totally forgot about that kiss for a blessed moment there 😭 But I think I read that too, you're right. Ugh, infuriating doesn't even begin to cover it. I really do feel for Chris and Seb as well, absolutely. I know that, as actors, they must be used to having their scenes cut or something not turning the way they would've preferred it to, but that doesn't mean it doesn't still suck. They really did invest so much in these characters and that relationship for YEARS, only for Marvel to just totally disregard it all in the end. No wonder Chris was confused and annoyed about it (and Seb too, judging from some of his snide remarks about it over the years)

I don't know if Marvel would've been better off (in terms of financial gain) if they had made Stucky canon, though. I would like to think so, but I doubt that would've been the case. They made a lot of money with CW anyway, probably even more by adding more Tony because he's a popular character among the Marvel fanboys, and of course they made even more with Endgame, and look at how that treated Steve and Bucky's relationship 🙃

Of course, a LOT of people would've loved it if Stucky had become canon! But a lot of people would've also hated it, for bigoted reasons, so I never expected them to actually do it anyway. But I would've just been happy with them just staying ambiguous pals in the same bloody timeline, that would've been enough!!! But we couldn't even have that 🫠

Aaaaanyway! Time to stop thinking about this and go focus on some happy Stucky thoughts, good plan 😅💞 Hope you can do the same, lovely!

[yanderegrizzsworld]

Hello! I saw that you write for Wally Darling, and forgive me if this is weird in anyway, but, Yandere Wally Darling x Trans Male reader that doesn't really care? Kinda like;

Wally begging the reader to stay and the reader is just kinda like; alright I guess-

Yknow, no fear, doesn't mind the creepiness? Please tell me if this is off limits! I don't want to accidentally make you uncomfortable... please and thank you! Take your time.

Imagine: Romantic Yandere Wally Darling with a reader who doesn't mind his yandere behavior

A.N: Hello dear! Quick reminder that I don't write gendered reader, the reader's gender in my writing is always ambiguous

Wally's world has always had it's odd & quirky elements, be that of it's environment or it's neighbors. Because of this, Wally's odd habit of staring & way of speaking doesn't bring much if any concern from the others, merely regarding it as a part of him.

He doesn't see the idiosyncrasy of his fixation on you if you don't mind it. No matter what leaves his mouth or how long or intense his stares are, he continues with his behaviors. You don't seem to mind, why should he?

Any concern from another neighbor about his demeanor towards you has him initially refutes said nervosities, asserting that if what they're saying were true, you would've said something by now. Yet the worries of the neighbors sit at the back of his mind, making Wally question himself & how he acts around you.

Anytime thoughts like that pop up, he's initial instinct, without fail, is to immediately locate your whereabouts & asks you upfront if his attitude towards you, at the very least, startle you . No matter how many times you claim it doesn't, Wally can't help but consider that you might be lying to make him feel better. Though he does snap out of it briskly, you'd never lie to him!

As Wally absolutely adores having your attention on him most (if not at all) of the time, his covetousness makes itself known if your attention is on someone else for too long. The puppet instantly implores for you to stay longer for lost time between you two & feels a smile grow on his face when you shrug & agree.

Wally relishes in your easygoing attitude with him, even in situations where if it were any other neighbor, they'd promptly start asking questions & strive to leave or keep a distance with him. He'd often laugh silently to himself, while he appreciates his neighbors concern for him, he's perfectly fine, he's just completely delighted whenever you spend quality time with him & only him!

[twisted-fics-in-wonderland]

Nightmare Comfort Scarabia

Prompt: Y/N had a nightmare and asks comfort

Characters: Kalim, Jamil

✨🌸Fluff🌸✨

I wrote this on my Obey me Blog and people liked it so I'mma feed my fellow TWST Simps one dorm at a time ( •̀ ω •́ )✧

Y/N is going to be gender neutral to the best of my abilities. They/Them Pronouns, and I’m going to try and avoid gendered descriptors <3

TW/CW: Not describing what was in the nightmare but if that ambiguity bothers you and makes your mind spiral please don’t read and have a wonderful night, 

Heartslabyul | Savanaclaw | Octavinelle | Scarabia(here) | Pomefiore | Ignihyde | Diasomnia |

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N jolted upright, holding their chest as it felt as if their heart would run away. They tried to calm their breathing and their thoughts, unable to shake the horrors their subconscious cruelly subjected them to. They took some deep breaths and manage to calm themself enough to look at the time. They squinted as the cheap phone Crowley gave them lights up and the numbers display on the screen. It was late.

They wondered if it may be too late to ask for comfort from someone. Of course they could just pet Grim but they didn't feel like dealing with the feline whining and complaining in that moment. So taking another deep breath both to sooth their shaky hands and for some courage, they opened their contacts to make a phone call.

Kalim

Y/N had no issue calling Kalim, he was always willing to help a friend in need. They patiently waited for Kalim to answer, knowing that they'd soon receive the comfort they sought.

"Y/N.." the young man whined at his magicless friend, "I'm tired..."

"I know.. I'm sorry for waking you up," they sighed softly, "I had a nightmare and I was hoping that you'd stay on the phone with me for a while?"

"A bad dream? Y/N why didn't you say so? I should come over there," he mused, excited to comfort them in their time of need but disregarding the fact that they had only suggested comfort over the phone

"You don't need to, I don't want to worry Jamil and-" Kalim shushed them by loudly and confidently talking.

"Jamil will be okay! I'll be over in no time," his cheerful voice made it hard to tell him no before he hung up.

They sighed softly, smiling a bit to themself and heading down to the front door and waiting patiently for the knock at the door. When Kalim knocked on the door Y/N swings the door open and pounced on their friend. They hugged him tightly and Kalim hugged back just as tightly. They let go eventually, taking his hand and leading him into the dorm and out of the cold.

"Y/N! I was already looking to invite you to have a sleep over with me but this works too!" he knew this wasn't a sleep over but he was going to treat it like one.

Kalim took his coat off to reveal his expensive silk pajamas. He also carried a bag with him. It looked to be full of snacks and drinks, along with some movies and a laptop to watch them on. "Wow, he really came prepared," Y/N giggled to themself.

"I thought we could put on a movie to make you feel better," he smiled sweetly at them. He was just happy to help.

"Thank you Kalim," they smiled back, hugging him once again, "lets get back to bed."

"Yeah! I brought a variety of stuff so you could pick something you liked!" he excitedly told them while heading to their room.

The rest of the night went nicely. Kalim put on the movie, it was enjoyable with all of the snacks and drinks he brought. Though neither of them lasted long before falling back asleep in each other's company.

Jamil

Y/N fought with themself internally about calling Jamil as he already had more than just a full plate with taking care of Kalim. They were sure he wouldn't exactly appreciate them making more work for him. They hesitantly, and with a deep breath, called the poor overworked man. They traced the quilted design on their thin blanket to sooth themself as they waited.

"Hello?" a tired, exasperated voice came through the phone's speaker.

"Hey," they spoke awkwardly

"Do you need something? Make it quick, I just got Kalim to go to sleep," Jamil sighed out in a harsh tone.

They froze for a moment at the sudden passive aggression Oh no they're traumatized.. Same /j, which normally wouldn't bother them as that was just how Jamil was(sarcastic, dry, blunt, etc) when he didn't feel like acting overly nice, but they felt more sensitive than normal this night. When they began to stammer out a response it came out quiet in almost a whisper.

"I had a nightmare and I was just.." they let out a soft yet frustrated sigh, "sorry. I shouldn't have called," the hung up and flopped onto their back.

Y/N sniffled softly after a while, the anger subsiding and the thought of the dream returning to them. As fast as the memories were creeping back, they were pulled back to reality just as fast by their phone ringing. They hesitated to pick it up as they saw Jamil's name, they of course answered.

"Hello...?" they spoke shakily.

"Are you okay?" Jamil huffed from the other end.

"Jamil..." they sighed and placed their palm on their forehead, "don't worry about it."

"Well, it must have been bad if you called me."

"And you made it clear you were too busy to help me so don't worry about it," they surprised themself with how abrasive of a tone they had taken.

"I'm sorry," he sucked up his pride for the time being, but it was clear it was still hard for him to say, "just tell me what I can do."

"Stay on the phone with me at least until I fall back asleep?"

"That's all?" he asked, mildly surprised they didn't need more than that.

"Yeah.. I just don't want to be alone after... all of that,"

"You don't have to think about it anymore," he sighed, switching to facetime swiftly,

The pair sat awkwardly for a while, before getting comfortable in their beds.

"So, does this happen often?" Jamil tried to ease the tension.

"More often than I want them too," they snort

"You're not going to give me a clear answer are you?" he chuckled, a small smile forming.

"Nope, goodnight, Jamil," they nuzzled into their covers.

"Goodnight, Y/N."

[katy-133]

Bluey Spoilers for The Sign (S3 Special)

This episode is so polished, not just from an animation and story standpoint, but also on a structural level.

I really wanna talk about it, so let's go step by step with this.

Early on in this episode (it's over 30 minutes instead of the usual 7), Calypso tells Bluey a story about a farmer who is granted what appears to be good luck (having a horse), which actually leads to bad luck (getting injured from the horse and is forced to stay in bed), but then leads to good luck (the military comes and takes all the young men from the village, except the farmer, because he couldn't leave his bed). It's basically the "blessing in disguise" idiom.

Good luck, bad luck, good luck.

Bluey is confused by the ambiguous ending, not understanding how an ending can be both happy or sad.

Then the rest of the episode proceeds to illustrate this idea for Bluey to better understand it.

The whole episode uses the same reversal of fortune structure right to the end. Just when I thought they'd finished using it, it would come back again, bringing more and more previously planted elements into play.

Bluey's Mum needs to find the missing bride (bad fortune), so she takes the girls to a bubble tea shop where Bluey finds a coin (good fortune). They find a telescope and Bluey has a coin to use it, but it gets stuck and she gets upset (bad fortune). Because the coin is stuck, the sheep dog family are able to use the telescope later on to spy a different house they want to buy instead.

Bluey will never realise that her actions directly affected the outcome of her getting to keep her home. asdfghjkl

There's so many other details I'm leaving out, but that illustrates the overall structure.

I love domino affect stories like that where everything's interconnected and little details from one person's life are directly affecting a stranger's. It's very Dirk Gently, it's very 428 Shibuya Scramble, it's very Good Omens. It creates this emerging narrative that our lives are more intertwined than we realise and that trying to do right by your community effects your community (and past it) more than you can even be fully aware of. I think it's an important message for kids (anyone really), because it gives you this perspective on life that urges you to try to do the right thing, even in the face of feeling powerless or small.

[deeplyridiculouslyinlove]

Ranking Wheel of Time Characters and their Narrative Arcs

I've been thinking about a post like this since probably book 8, so here we go. My ranking of the arcs of the major characters in the Wheel of Time book series, and separately my ranking of those actual characters (because they are not the same!!)

Arcs:

Nynaeve

I could say a literally never-ending amount of things about my darling Nynaeve. I think she has the most internal development of any character in the series, which makes her feel especially human to me. Getting to watch her learn that her anger is rooted in fear and a lack of control and to confront that was so powerful and it felt very real. Watching her grow from hating Moiraine to standing beside Moiraine at the end with Rand made me so emotional. And speaking of Rand, it was so nice to have one of the original Emonds Fielders with him in the later books to witness his descent--I think it added depth and believability both to her character and her position having cared for the younger ones when they were kids, and also really helped humanize Rand. While I tend to think Nynaeve's relationship with Lan is really random since they barely speak to each other when they fall over their skis in love with one another (apparently), by the end of the books I'd accepted it and it also made me emotional when she went behind Lan's back to find all the other Malkieris to ride into battle with him. I just feel really proud of Nynaeve and want the world for her and I'm glad that she was given a real growth arc the series.

2. Mat

So I grew from thinking Mat was a bit annoying and childish, to finding him fine as a character but listening to his chapters at 1.6 speed because I didn't care about carousing at inns or random bands of fighters, to having his chapters be my favorite. And I think that's because Mat really evolves throughout the series in a way that still feels very believable and true to the same person/character. He's is written so well as a character learning lessons while staying true to the core of who he was in the first book. I felt a lot of pride for Mat when he rescued Moiraine, and although I saw some chatter by folks on the internet that they'd be fine if the Daughter of the Nine Moons thing doesn't happen in the show, I actually really liked his relationship with Tuon because it was one of the few relationships we saw actually build and develop slowly. Despite being a fated relationship, they also spend time together and develop a rapport. It was a fated marriage not fated love, and I thought that worked much better than the fated loves of Rand’s polycule. I also liked that Mat and Tuan's relationship had some ambiguity until the end; although they clearly cared for one another, we never saw them come to really understand one another, which felt authentic to the situation they were in. Mat is also one of the very few men in these books who actually recognizes that there are things he doesn't know and doesn't need to be involved in, and I appreciate that from a male character in what ultimately remains a pretty patriarchal world despite RJ's structural changes to society (I can back up this statement about patriarchy, but that is a whole separate post). I think this is likely at least in part because Mat doesn't engage with the Power, which is the part of the books that most upholds patriarchal stereotypes and values. Now I'm rambling about Mat more than his arc, but I think he both has a lot of depth and grows internally in significant ways and I really appreciate it!

3. Aviendha

I love Aviendha as a character, and I think her arc is another really good example of slow internal growth. We see get to see her go from Maiden to Wise One to the person who discovers the new message hidden in Rhuidian and what that means for her entire people. We see her struggle with what it means to have left the Waste and what she feels is right for the future. And all of this without that many point-of-view chapters compared to other characters! Aviendha's relationship with Rand also feels the most authentic to me of any of his three women. We actually get to see their dynamic build and see them spending time together, it’s not just like “oh I’m fated to love him!” They also spend time apart and Aviendha doesn't spend that time pining over him, but rather focused on her own goals and the bigger picture. From the narrative, I get why they like each other and also why they are a good match for each other. I don't love her getting injured in the way she does at the Last Battle because I'm not really sure what purpose it serves (I guess it's the ultimate sacrifice for an Aiel to not be able to walk or fight?), but if my biggest qualm with her arc is only at the very end, I'll still rank it quite high.

4. Egwene

When I started reading the books and talking to friends about the gender dynamics in them and the female characters, so many of them mentioned how Egwene gets one of the best arcs in the series. And while I don't disagree with that (I have her ranked in the top 5 still!), I think the fact that Egwene is not a ta'veren in the series really hurts her arc in the later books. Once she's Amyrlin, and particularly once she goes back to the tower as Amyrlin, I feel like she starts to get plot armor that detracts from her actual development. All she has to do is talk and people are completely swayed to her side in a way that I think sort of stunts her internal growth. I loved her time with the Wise Ones in the Waste and with the Aiel and I think it really showcased her eagerness and dedication in a way I related to, and it made her growth in Tel'aran'rhiod and becoming the Amyrlin feel really deserved. Her ending was tragic and powerful and somehow it both doesn't feel like what she deserved but also feels like it lives up to Egwene and I feel really conflicted about it!! I'm was very meh on the Gawyn stuff, since I don't think it really added anything and he's a bit of a downer of a character--honestly, Egwene is the character in the books I most wish had just not had to have a romantic relationship. That said, unlike a lot of other relationships in the seires, we at least see Egwene's feelings for Gawyn develop over time in the dream world so it wasn't as frustrating for me as some other characters' romantic arcs.

5. Rand

For me Rand's and Egwene's arcs are really really close in terms of how much I like them, but I think there are things missing in the execution of Rand's arc that make it a bit lower for me--had it been done slightly better (from my perspective) I think it would have edged out Egwene. I really *want* to empathize with Rand starting around book 11 when his PTSD and the weight of everything else he’s carrying really starts to impact him. But because he spent the first five books whining about how everyone is trying to use him as a puppet (and particularly suspecting literally any woman with power before he had been given any reason to do so), his later arc doesn’t lead well into him then being someone you’re supposed to empathize with in my opinion. Particularly because his whole arc in the later books is about love and compassion, but I don't feel like we get that from him in the early books? I find it very confusing. I think for that progression to work we really needed a part of his arc where trusting and/or showing compassion to someone leads to serious harm, then he turns hard, and then he remembers the need for compassion. Maybe I’ve just forgotten it but I really can’t think of anything at all like that first step in the books? He distrusts the people who eventually hurt him? And things generally work out for him, even though he’s struggling internally? Anyway, this rating is higher than it otherwise would be because of how much I *want* it to work because having a chosen one who so clearly struggles with the weight that destiny places on him is interesting and the madness angle is also interesting to me. Oh also, I think Rand should have actually died at the end and that not doing so makes his arc more boring, sorryyyyy.

6. Faile

Faile is another character I really wanted more for. I hated the weird dynamics in her relationship with Perrin, but I could have liked them together without the physical abuse and if the power dynamics had felt more consensual and didn't have this whole element of her expecting Perrin to behave towards her in a way that he clearly didn't want to. Her being the lady to his lord was cute! I also liked Faile's progression from being a Hunter of the Horn to guarding the horn at the end. I like how self suffiicient she was and how she was able to find a way to combine what she was born for/raised for and what her parents wanted for her (being a noblewoman) with what she wanted (adventure and love).

7. Perrin

I have very few real issues with Perrin's arc and I’m sure other people liked it a lot. My ranking it relatively low is much more that it bored me and I left the series unsure of what it was trying to say than it being a bad arc or doing Perrin a disservice. I hated Perrin's relationship with Faile, and I hated that I hated it because (as discussed above) I think it had a lot of potential. Like Mat, I appreciated that Perrin did not think he needed to be involved in everything nor that he was always right, and I found his growth from boy to man quite believable and that it took place over the course of the books in a way that was well-constructed. I found the whole question of hammer vs axe and his contemplation of the Way of the Leaf to be really interesting! But I'm not sure I fully grasped the resolution of that debate and what the entire focus on it in the narrative was trying to say. And I feel the same about his struggle with the wolf side of him. Is the point just that violence is sometimes needed? And/or that it eats us up from inside? (But also that we have to accept that?)

8. Elayne

I want to do my best to separate Elayne from her arc, since I personally don't love her character for reasons purely of personal preference. I think the reasons her arc specifically is lower for me is that I feel like we don't get to see her growing into being a queen, since one of her primary character traits is that she is already so royal when they all meet her. I think the decision to have her win her crown in Caemlyn with a battle where they just snuck up behind the other forces was a weak one -- why couldn't they have defeated these people before if it was that easy? I also don't love that she gets no time to like learn how to be a queen before she is more focused on becoming a mother. The whole pregnancy arc doesn't sit quite right with me. She sleeps with Rand literally once and it's basically just to get pregnant? But this just builds off of what I dislike about how she just decides she's in love with Rand one day because she is fated to be. Give me the scene where they bond over war strategy and thinking like rulers like six books earlier instead of in the last book! It also seems like there's no reason she and Aviendha couldn't have become friends before realizing they both liked Rand instead of because they are forced into proximity by that fact, and I also feel like she and Rand should have spent actual time together before falling for each other--to my mind the way her part of the polycule goes down weakens Elayne's relationships with both Aviendha and Rand, which otherwise could have been interesting.

9. Moiraine

I have far too much to say about my baby Moiraine. I'm including New Spring in these arcs, and reading that made me want to reread the whole series in a new light. I love her. I love her I love her I love her. And to me New Spring makes her arc in the main series both more powerful and more tragic. Seeing in New Spring just how determined she is and also how much self-doubt she carries and how much her Aes Sedai serenity of the later books is disguising inner turmoil is so rewarding. I wish we had gotten to see so so much more of it. I know that she has to be mysterious to our main characters, but I don't think she has to be mysterious to the readers, particularly once we are more than a few books into a fourteen book series. To that end, I know why she had to go away (she is the Merlin character after all!), but I wish she had come back a few book sooner and we could have seen literally any interiority about reckoning with her time in the Tower of Ghenjei. The Moiraine in New Spring would have been going CRAZY both leading up to knowing she had to go through that archway and while stuck in the tower--even if she was being tortured, which she also would have withstood for a while. The fact that she couldn't take action that it was such a passive way of supporting Rand and his mission would have killed her, but also she would have been so very resolute, and I wish we could have seen that more. Instead, she just like shows up right before the last battle, speaks her piece, goes to help Rand (presumably thinking she's going to die??), and we see none of it from her POV! She never sees Siuan again and because we can't see into her mind that's just like...chill?? And obviously I hate the book pairing her with Thom, particularly her *offering to give up her abilities* for him. I see what it adds for his character arc, but what does it add for hers? Plus there is literally no reason to remove her powers and give her that powerful ter'angreal instead. That's just RJ's obsession with disempowering women and I despise it.

10. Siuan

Oh Siuan. My other baby Siuan. I'm only ranking her arc this high because I think it had a lot of potential to be telling an interesting story, but I think her ending was so horrible I can barely think about it. There was so much potential here to be telling a story about how you can have power and influence and be important even if you are less powerful and that the strength to manipulate and steamroll people is not the only way to make a difference, but I feel like this would have been a much more interesting message if she was the only (or one of the few) powerful women to get knocked down like this rather than it happening to literally every woman with power at the beginning of the series in one way or another. I particularly hated that with Siuan they did this knocking her down a peg in a way that made her younger and pretty for an old man (when she was only like 40 in the first place I might add!)--and she also started acting younger in a way that felt strange. I liked her teaching Egwene, but why couldn't she have some of the teacher vibes Moiraine did? And the way she dies with no one noticing or caring and it making basically no difference to the plot is so horrible. And, I'm sorry, it's not what the character deserved. Nor was it in line with the message I thought her arc was trying to send about the ability to have an impact no matter how unpowerful in traditional ways. And it happens because she doesn't stay with a man?!?! No one even knows she mattered after she was deposed and it’s all so unfair.

11. Lan

I feel like Lan doesn't really grow that much as a character since he spends the entire series basically just expecting to die in various ways at different times. Even with New Spring I don't feel like we get a good sense of what his character is meant to be doing besides impacting other characters in the series. I am not against his relationship with Nynaeve, but I don't think the books flesh it out very well. And I'm still mad he ends the series mad at Moiraine--where is their New Spring dynamic of him vibing with her even when he's annoyed with her? Obviously his leading the Malkieri into the blight really hit me in the feels and was a great culmination of his plight, however, which is why I still think the arc deserves an honorable mention.

12. Thom

Thom's arc is basically just from hating Aes Sedai to marrying Moiraine, and getting continually paired with weirdly young women. I guess he learns to overcome prejudice based on his nephew's death? I do like the role he plays with Rand and Mat and their respective character development as they grow up from the Two Rivers to adventurers, but I'm not sure that's really his arc or development. But for that I'm giving him a higher ranking than his Moiraine arc alone deserves.

13. Tuan

I don't think think Tuan gets that much of an arc. While she becomes Empress, she doesn't seem to grow or change her mind on things during the series, and mostly she puts aside things she doesn't like very much with intentions of dealing with them later. BUT I like how her and Mat challenge each other and engage with each other, and I think the internal growth is somewhat implied or is something that would have happened if we had had more time with her. I wish the entire Seanchan plot was more resolved at series end, but that's not specific to Tuan.

14. Loial

This may be controversial, but I don't like Loial's arc very much! I don't think he needed to get married! I'm glad he seems happy about it in the end, but it feels unnecessary. I loved him adventuring and writing his book and being sort of childlike in a really endearing way, but everything with his mom and with Erith took him out of the story for a long time and seemed to be sending the message that ultimately everyone wants to settle down. Let him explore and write his book and be a late bloomer! Idk.

15. Min

I am ranking Min even below the characters that only have a fraction of an arc because I loved Min so much in the earlier books and I hate the way the series treated her subsequently. When we first meet her she is determined to be fully herself, despite a talent that makes her stand out and a personality inclined against confrontation. She's brave and interesting! I hated watching her become more ladylike for Rand, and for a while essentially being absolutely nothing more than a lover and comfort for Rand. I really wish we had had more lingering payoff for the many books that Min was reading and trying to parse out what the prophecies meant, but it felt like Cadsuane was basically like "yes I agree" and then...it was no longer about Min having figured it out?

And just for fun, here would be my list of these same characters from ones I like most to ones I like least (although I like them all tbh!!)

Characters:

Moiraine (main trilogy + new spring)

Nynaeve

Egwene

Moiraine (main trilogy only)

Aviendha

Mat

Siuan (main trilogy AND main trilogy + new spring)

Loial

Rand

Lan (main trilogy + new spring)

Perrin

Lan (main trilogy only)

Faile

Elayne

Tuan

Thom

[balkanradfem]

I also watched Heretic after seeing Alyssa Grenfell's video on it and had mixed thoughts. There were things I thought were done well, like portraying how mormonism has groomed and set up the Sisters to enter dangerous situations and not know how to react i.e Sister Paxton fawning and Sister Barnes being discreet and polite about trying to leave. At their age I also would've politely gone along with anything while internally panicking.

And I know it's a mormon thing, but I also appreciate that the Sisters get called by their title and their own last name for the whole movie, it's very rare for a woman to be addressed that way. I also appreciated that for a -man kidnapping young girls- movie, it doesn't get too obscene or sexual (at least not explicitly). And I do get the point of them having an old man specifically target young women and lecturing them on religion (that negatively impacts them, not him) and setting them up to lose 'games' they never agreed to play. Very common thing men do, target young women with their complaining and psycopathic nonsense that they'd be too scared to pull with another man.

One thing that struck me though was Sister Barnes having her birth control implant violently ripped out. I saw what they were going for with how religion (men) control women's reproductive rights, but I don't think it was very well done and felt more like shock value. Even the character Mr Reed didn't seem to have a reason why he did it, it felt unnecessary. Especially given the fact I'm certain a lot of men watching didn't know those even existed, its a very inconspicuous form of birth control that you'd have to know to look for. And now they know it can also be cut out. That made me feel sick. Also the fact that Sister Barnes dies while being the one that is implied to be sexually active and less religious did not sit well with me at all.

They other thing was the women being locked in cages. They were so dehumanized that I don't think the directors even considered that the audience would care what their fates were and if they got to escape the house too.

The ending was the main thing that did it for me though. On one hand I'd like to see it as not mocking women for having faith despite religions being obviously designed by men who want to subjugate them, but it felt more like a flimsy it's okay to be religious too :) It can be a positive thing aswell :) that fell flat for me. Especially with the house being a metaphor for religion. So what, it's okay to stay kidnapped and under a mans control sometimes? If they wanted to follow through on the point of religion being a way to control women (which is one of the things I liked about it, and not something many movies dare point out) they should've kept up with the Sisters outsmarting him and having them both escape because of their own intellect and not have one die and the more 'innocent' one live through a 'miracle'. I also didn't care for the ambiguous ending on if Sister Paxton even did get out. It's overdone and I'm tired of women always getting terrible endings.

With a few changes it could've been a really great movie, and I still think it re-watchable because of Chloe East's and Sophie Thatcher's acting alone. (Thatcher singing the end credit cover of Knocking on Heaven Door was also a nice touch). But there was a lot of things that made me very aware that it was directed by a man (or men in this case). Anyway, loved reading your thoughts on the movie! Seems like we had similar opinions on it.

Thank you for the analysis, I agree with you too! The grooming and women being taught to either fawn or stay polite while absolutely terrified out of their minds and in great danger, was very jarring to see in this situation and I was glad that it was presented to us how not-normal and insane it is as a learned response. I was beyond frustrated that he was lecturing them on religion when, exactly as you said, it was negatively impacting them, not him, and he did a half-assed job, and knew less than them, despite presenting himself as a great learner.

I have to admit I skipped the ripping out the implant scene, as soon as I realized he was coming at her with a knife I closed my eyes and skipped. It probably was for the shock value. I think in the movie it was so he could lie about the implant being a proof that she's not a real person? I was taken aback that that sister Paxton recognized what it was, because I actually had no clue about it, I was kinda appreciating being educated about this existing. You are so right about the implications that she was less holy for being sexually active, that didn't even cross my mind!!

I was devastated, horrified and filled with grief for women locked in cages, you are right that they were given no second thought but I was crying and grieving for them and had to take a long time to tell myself that this wasn't real and I don't need to go find a way to free them. Seeing that was incredibly painful and traumatic to me.

I agree that the ending fell flat too. What did you do all that for just to defend religion if it's a choice.

I can see that sometimes women take religion and cut out all the bad parts and turn it into something positive for themselves and the community, such as, make it about their loved ones, like the butterfly idea, or pray for others just because the act of praying is selfless and loving and kind, but in those cases I don't consider it religion anymore I see it as individual women cultivating kindness and community and love. They would have done that without religion too. It's certainly not the point of religion to have women do that, it's women going rogue and using religion as a tool to forge community in their own way, not as servants but as equals, decision makers. Religion never focuses on that.

So I wouldn't use that argument to defend religion, its an argument in favour of women. I feel like movie used it to defend religion and I don't agree with that. But I also feel like they needed to do that in order to not be portrayed as 'evil blasphemy movie that nobody should be watching because it's anti religion', they wanted to make themselves not opposed, in order to be more palatable to the masses and religious people, they wanted everyone to be able to watch it and not feel attacked for their beliefs. But now I'm just speculating, I don't know what the real goal was.

I agree that it's rewatchable because the actresses were incredible! And it would have been better if they both escaped. And i loved knocking on heaven's door too. I loved your analysis and your thoughts on it!

[shatouto]

random OC ask: what is an alternate life path your OC might have gone down? how different would their life be if they'd made those decisions instead?

ohohohoho. ohoho. oh boy

i think there are two biggest "branching off timelines" moments in solli's life, at least so far

1. running away with astarion VS staying with cazador

this moment, to be more exact. in the good timeline, solli comes down to the kennel, frees and heals astarion, and runs away with him

if solli hadn't come down to the kennel that night, cazador would keep astarion in there and torture him for another week, maybe even month, however long it takes for astarion to learn his lesson and never even think of approaching solli again. the cazador in my story enjoys making the distinction between his half-vampire heir and the spawn who are beneath him.

then cazador would rethink his approach so far and inject solli's sterile environment with more and more of his lordly venom. he will say that solli is about the right age to really learn, and start to mould solli into a second version of him.

solli is young, obedient and attached. he actually really loves his father, even in the good timeline, never mind here. he has always hung onto cazador's every word. i think once solli gets over the trauma of having to brutally beat astarion who is someone he cares about, the innocent child will truly be gone.

in this timeline solli will become a full-fledged cazador 2.0, and what he lacks in true vampire power he makes up with sadism. he will be an artillerist artificer who also makes torture device on the side (godey hates it; automation might take away his job someday!). he is cazador's second in command, often seen by his side during social gatherings, and he preens in that position. the spawn, especially astarion, hate him a lot. he doesn't care because he thinks they're beneath him

he doesn't know that he's also a sacrificial lamb when the time comes, just a little more special. he might or might not survive cazador's ascension, depending on how it goes

2. convincing astarion not to ascend VS helping astarion ascend

(this will be towards the end of the story so i haven't written it obviously lol)

this fork in the road assumes that solli did previously run away with astarion and was by his side for years before they come back to szarr palace to face cazador (like in the game).

this is basically the ascendant ending but because solli's relationship to astarion is a bit different from tav's, i still wanna talk about it a bit (also bc i've thought about it A Lot)

i think ascended lord astarion would really double down on gloating about having "stolen" cazador's heir. it's kind of sad because it's been years since he stopped thinking of solli as just a trophy and a fuck you to cazador; he's come to love the kid. but, with time, ascension will bring out the worst in him.

he has solli grow his hair out long again (so he looks more like cazador than ever), dresses him up all prettily, and keeps him locked in his beautiful chamber. solli is returned to exactly where he was as a child: a pretty doll in a glass case, to be displayed but never touched. lord astarion treats him pretty much the same way as cazador.

in my lore, solli can't really be turned into anything other than a half-vampire – he can't become a true vampire OR a dark consort. he was born being able to walk in the sun, so in return he can never have anything more than that. as such, astarion grows bored with him after a while and leaves him isolated for longer and longer stretches of time as he finds amusement elsewhere.

i'm ambiguous on whether astarion would torture him for fun at any point in time. it's possible, considering solli can look A Lot like cazador especially if you're like squinting to see that. maybe lord astarion would do it when he's feeling extra vindictive or resentful (or bored), i'm not sure

regardless, solli will just wither away in solitude and eventually die alone

[unfortunate-stranger-losers]

do quigley or duncan or their sister die? I’m on season 1 but I don’t think I’ve ever seen a clip anywhere of quigley and duncan together 😢

While the books leave it ambiguous, I do believe there is a definitive answer. Major spoilers for S3/all 13 books under the cut.

In the series!canon, Quigley reunites with his siblings on the SSHAM, and the secret code in The Incomplete History references them reuniting with the Baudelaires on Briny Beach.

In the book!canon, well... I have an unpopular opinion on this one; I believe that most, if not all of the members of the Queequeg crash survived. And this isn't just because I love the Quagmires and Fiona... I have evidence!

You see, we know that most of Snicket's knowledge of the Baudelaires' thoughts, feelings and situations were taken from their island commonplace book - A Series of Unfortunate Events- as he mentions them writing in the book. However, they could not write information they were not privy to, and all they knew about the Queequeg crash was that Kit suspected everyone was eaten by the Great Unknown. 

However, in an earlier portion of The End, when the Baudelaires are traveling to the arboretum, Snicket says that their friends (the Quagmires, Fiona probably) were "in circumstances just as dark although quite a bit damper than" theirs. "Just as dark" does not qualify death at the moment, as the Baudelaires are simply under a moral quandary and the Medusoid Mycelium has not been released yet. As well as this, they would not know if their friends were in a "damp" situation, just a "dark" one. And who would know better what situation they were in at that time than the Quagmires themselves?

As such, Snicket likely knows something we don't. As well as this, we know Kit's story doesn't always align with the truth- she claims all three Widdershins were on the Queequeg when it crashed, however Snicket stated in The Penultimate Peril that Fernald was fighting the Quagmires aboard the ship (not necessarily implicating Fernald in villainy, it's likely Duncan and Isadora just saw him and heard the kill bill sirens). 

Why would he leave their fate ambiguous? Well, considering several villains survived the Hotel Denouement, and many of them are stated to have something against the Quagmires (the Woman and Man send their eagles to sink the SSHAM home, and Esmé was in charge of their estate and helped Olaf capture them), it's likely the Quagmires want to stay as under their enemies' radar as possible. 

Adding to this, they could be trying to stay off the radar of VFD itself; VFD does not have a crystal-clear reputation, and in fact seems to have a dangerous cult-like atmosphere (best description here, but also see here, here, here). And seeing as Fernald is very disillusioned with the organization, now an enemy of both sides, he would definitely not want to be seen by them; adding to this Fiona's loyalty to him and the beginnings of her break with the organization in The Grim Grotto, she'd probably want to lay low as well. 

Duncan and Isadora also, probably, very against VFD. They found out something about it while researching, and after being captured by Olaf and the White-Faced Women, they shout to the Baudelaires that they learned about something terrible- which they immediately follow up by shouting about VFD. And considering how useless the volunteers were in rescuing them, and how they spent a lot of time with Hector, who seems to have either left the organization or be hiding from them, they almost definitely do not have a good view of it. Even though Quigley was p much successfully inducted by Jacques, he's not going to want to leave his siblings so soon after their reunion. 

All that to say, at the very least, everyone but Widdershins has good reasons to want VFD to leave them alone. So throwing out that they're alive would be dangerous for them, especially if Snicket mentioned they'd contacted him. So he likely gave some clues and left it ambiguous so as to not completely lie. 

As to how they survived? I've linked to @snicketsleuth a lot but they have a pretty good idea...

tl;dr the Queequeg and SSHAMH crews are probably alive!

[powdermelonkeg]

Hey do you think it's possible to fix how time travel works in skyward sword so that this link can be the first hero who fought demise in the distant past? The one from the legend I think Zelda tells us (but maybe it was someone else, my memory isnt that great).

Anyways, I'm curious because I think that's what we were supposed to think. That Link became the hero in the present, them went to the past, and by defeating Demise became the hero from the past.

So, for this, you've got two options, one involving Link himself being known, and the other being Link's legend. They've got different criteria, so it depends on what you're looking for.

If you want it to be Link that's acknowledged, with the caveat that you also subscribe to the belief at the end of the rapidly-fraying timeline post, then you can say that when Fi course-corrected the timeline, that that was a side effect put into motion to make sure Link still encountered the legend that would lead him downward.

However, if you want it to be the legend, provided you also want to go along with what's intended for the timeline (because I doubt they actually put any thought into all those possible splits in the chart), then you can look to the Ballad of the Goddess.

This exists, alongside the legend of the man the goddess gave a sailcloth to. And everything up until this point-

-was pre-determined. Link was supposed to win the Wing Ceremony, Zelda was supposed to hear a call for the surface, and so on.

The Ballad of the Goddess was meant to be a hint and guidance for the hero when he first starts out. He knows what his job is, what the end result should be, even with other stakes at play. So we can reason that Hylia had at least some limited future sight ability in order to generate these prophecies.

With that in mind, the above phrase that generated my whole Mudora theory could well have been the same thing—Hylia telling her people about what's to come, but either leaving out details so they think it's already happened, or time itself distorting the tale to change it from future tense to past tense as it's retold each generation. We know from Gaepora's meeting with Fi that the stories of the past are altered and missing pieces. So if you want to stay as true-to-intention as possible, I'd say go with that.

My own thoughts on this line below the cut.

Personally, it's the past tense that gets me hung up on this bit of dialogue; that the goddess gave the sailcloth back then. It throws me into speculation mode because I'm like "no, that hasn't happened yet, so that means it's happened twice!!!" which gives me a springboard to speculate what the world before Demise might have been like. It's also a line that could have been fixed with a single word.

You know, they say that the goddess promised the Sailcloth to her chosen hero long ago.

If they'd done that, there would be no room for questioning. I do kind of want to ask @sunnylaurels what the exact wording is in Japanese so I know without a shadow of a doubt that it's a dialogue error and not a mistranslation (after BotW's journal conundrum I no longer trust localizations) but-

The fact of the matter is, regardless of what's intended, I think it's more fun to speculate about an unknown predecessor to Link. Someone who tried, who failed, who was given a second chance, who was scattered to the winds of time to fulfill a purpose. It's a whole pocket where I can basically make up what I want, and the canon is just ambiguous enough to support it, which is amazing.

However, I also know that some theories, despite how they're technically canon-compliant, feel like they betray the canon to subscribe to on the basis of the Zeldevs' intentions. I know for a fact that the dialogue was intended to reference Skyward Sword Link. In a similar vein, I know that Breath of the Wild's 10k years ago are intended to happen after everything else in Zelda canon, or that nearly everything in Twilight Princess is intended to be a callback to Ocarina of Time.

I just have a serious case of "but what if THIS tho!"